Rosie Kelly Smith On Carving Her Own Lane

0:02Made by Mommas will be here in just a moment. Straight after this episode, make sure you check out the latest from Get a Grip with Angela Scanlon and Vicky Patterson. Spring has definitely sprung and the ladies are hitting reset and sharing all the tips you need if you're ready to step out of that winter hibernation. Plus, as awards season wraps up, they're unpacking some of the biggest moments in their brilliantly unfiltered way. Just search Get a Grip now and get the latest episode lined up to play next. delicious spring gathering start at whole foods market shop the spring and bloom sales event with yellow sales signs throughout the store and serve your loved ones whole foods market seafood always responsibly farmed or sustainable wild caught explore vibrant seasonal flavors like their trending mango yuzu chantilly cake great for brunch or an after dinner treat speaking of brunch.

0:56Check out their deviled eggs, cold-pressed juices, and more. Spring is in bloom now at Whole Foods Market. A Rayo original podcast. Hello, I'm Pete Wicks, and my podcast, Man Made, is back for Series 2. I'm sitting down with more of my mates and famous faces to talk modern masculinity, who we are, who we want to be, and how we get there. Am I enough as any of these things? Am I any good at these things? Anger takes the place, I think, for men. Listen to Pete Wicks Man Made now. New episodes every Wednesday on the Rail app, Apple, Spotify, Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Made by Mamas the podcast.

1:37I'm Zoe Hardman and I'm Georgia Dayton and this is your parenting safe space where no conversation is off limits. With five kids between G and I we have seen a lot. We really have. Each week we'll be joined by some famous faces and experts and we'll chat about the brands and products that have saved us along the way. In short, we're the parenting podcast for you. Before we get started, hit subscribe or follow so you're the first to know when each episode lands. And they're on Tuesdays and Fridays. And it really helps if you leave a rating and a review. You can also find us on Instagram. We're on at Made by Mummers.

2:10But for now, George, should we get into it? Hello and welcome to Tuesday's episode of the podcast. A very, very, very exciting conversation today. We can't wait to dive into this one. Journalist, a new mum. We've just seen the most gorgeous photographs. of her little girl who she got in bunches for the first time today uh daughter of uh tv presenter lorraine kelly uh today's guest hopefully will kind of give us an insight into what new motherhood is looking like for her how she navigates everything and also growing up with a mum who is a household name please welcome rosie kelly smith to the podcast thank you hi how are you welcome i'm good i'm good it's uh yeah it's been a morning but yeah well it's actually been okay she um well i'm wearing proper clothes and i've put makeup on so it's not a normal morning um but my dad is looking after billy for the first time on his own oh how do you feel about this i'm i'm fine with it he's he's very funny he's proper like grumpy old Scottish man and very you know and um my mom always said that with me he was the one that gave me baths he took me swimming he was like throwing me around he was super confident but with Billy he treats her like she's made out of glass oh right he's very like is she okay is she fine so um does he change the nappies no so this is the thing he was like I don't I'm not I just I just don't want to you know I don't want to mess it up or anything oh it's already a mess so yes a big old mess down there but yeah I messaged him just before she came she he came to pick her up and said you're in luck she's just done a poo so great you won't have to deal with it so you'll be okay so he'll be absolutely fine um yeah so it's really yeah i hope he's okay i haven't heard anything so your parents still together yeah yeah how long have they been together how old am i always they've been married nearly 35 years now yeah i mean it's really interesting sitting opposite you because george and i grew up in the 90s 90s kids born in the 80s um and lorraine your mom Lorraine Kelly is was part of the furniture that voice just talk us through what it was like having a mom that you know is in everybody's households every single day still is I mean I don't know any difference so I think it's a bit weird when people always ask me like what yeah what was it like what happened I don't really know like it was very um normal for me because I didn't know any different um I think yeah I think I think the weirdest thing not the weirdest thing but the thing that a lot of people I found different was the fact that my dad was the one who was picking me up from school he was the one that was cooking he was and he was obviously working as well he was a cameraman um and self-employed so I think that was a big difference with other kids the fact that I had my dad being the one doing mostly everything my mum can't be trusted cooking at all she doesn't do the cooking god no no she does the glamour What was the day-to-day like?

4:59Because she was obviously doing breakfast TV. So what was like the weekly setup? So I had a nanny growing up when I was as little that would do the mornings. So my mum and dad would both be at work. My mum would get home around lunchtime and then take over and then she'd do the rest of the night. And then she would always say when I was really tiny and not sleeping that she didn't find it that bad because she was waking up at 3am going to work. Was it 3 o 'clock in the morning? Yeah, it was 3. And it's got slowly later and later. She's got more fabulous. So it's different. But she said it was just like jet lag, but worse.

5:36But she didn't really tell a difference because she was already up at that time. Yeah, of course. And some nights probably didn't sleep at all. No, no. Having a new baby. I often think about that because I'm quite close with Sean Welby, who's obviously capital. And she's had her baby and she also does this morning. And I sometimes wake up and then see that she's obviously been up for a couple of hours and she's got her little girl. and I'm hats off because I think doing that breakfast shift when you've got a new baby, you're basically just, you're catnapping when you can. Yeah, how old would your mum have been when she went back to work?

6:08I think I was six months maybe. Yeah. Yeah, which is nuts. How do you feel about her going back to work? She didn't really have a choice. They had, you know, a big mortgage and they were both self-employed and if you don't work, it's a little bit like what Shanwell said, because if you don't work, you don't get paid. Yeah, we know that one. Yeah, it's just the way that it was. But yeah, I always, for me, again, it was just normal seeing your mum working and both parents working as well. Did you think that everybody's parents were on the telly when you went to school? No, no. We had a guest on earlier on.

6:42Yeah. Yeah, Chloe. Obviously, she married to JB. It's Chloe Gill. And she was like, apparently her kids were like, well, so what does your dad do on the telly then? Because her dad's on the telly. Sorry, his dad's on the telly. So it was quite funny, wasn't it? Yeah, because obviously to them it's just completely normal. And then they just go to school thinking everyone's on the TV. That's just like a normal job to have. It's really weird. Where we lived is quite famous for rowing. So I went to the same school as Steve Redgrove's daughter. Okay. So we were like, oh, your dad's. It wasn't like a thing.

7:13It was like. Your dad's famous. Your dad's famous. It's like, oh, okay, it's normal. It's kind of normal. But yeah, we moved up to Scotland for secondary school. So I went from like a very tiny, like beautiful little village school, like eight people in my year to um nearly 100 up in scotland which was a bit uh eye-opening um and then that's when my mum would fly down so she would fly down on a sunday get back on tuesday and then fly down eventually fly down on a sunday come back on a thursday so she would do school on fridays what did you let's talk about like having that person as the role model you know the mother figure is is so important isn't it as well obviously the father as well but like that mother you sort of you as a girl you look at your mum don't you and what what did you think growing up about what she was doing and what did that instill in you in terms of your career I think I think it's just it's all I've ever known and it's the same with what my dad's done as well like my dad used to take me on set and we would be he'd be filming stuff and I'd be in the background like probably messing up wires and all of that but I just I think with I think it's so important that I had both sets of parents in the industry as well and I think that's also really important for my mum to have a partner that gets it and that understands a lot and that's my why she's so successful she's always said it's because my dad's like the sort of grounding rock of everyone just bringing everyone down but in a good way just making sure everyone's like okay solid and stable yeah solid and stable so I think it's it's the two of them having that has been has been big and I don't like my mum's dad he used to fix tvs so it was always in the it was always gonna happen I think he'll fix the telly yeah it was always the way that like it's just happened very organically that that's what I was gonna do and what I was gonna get into because I don't really know any different um god knows what Billy will end up doing yeah talk to us about becoming a mum yeah was it something that you always wanted I think so yeah I think I always wanted um I didn't have siblings and I never felt like I left I sort of missing was missing out on that but I always sort of thought I'd like to have a big family and then I had Billy and I was like really one is fine yeah one yeah I mean we might I don't know but at the moment she's so tiny still that I'm like I can't imagine and you're so fulfilled as well by like it's that kind of we keep I keep having this conversation with my partner at the moment we're like should we just have one yeah and what's the feeling uh at the moment don't know yeah there's so much we're getting married this summer and I said I don't want to be pregnant when I get married I want to have a nice time at the wedding yeah so that's my plan have a nice time at the wedding what was your birth like birth was great I really like my birth I mean as great as it can be I feel like there's never a good fabulous lovely way of giving birth it's gonna be a bit you know I got cut in half so I mean that's not um it's never you know that great but um I I had a plan section 37 38 weeks I think it was um and I did think if I do ever do it again I did I do always think I don't I will not tell my mum and Steve's mum um the date of it and the time because it was just like are you and we were supposed to we were going into hospital at two o 'clock and the section was supposed to happen at half five but it got pushed back because there was emergency sections during in the day um but by that point at five we were on the like basically waiting outside the the theater and we didn't have our phones on us so my poor poor mums were like we haven't heard nothing in two hours what's going on so I think they were having absolute kittens and me and Steve were like listening to just enjoying it what was your decision like what was the decision to have a planned section yeah it was um so I had placenta pravia right um up until like my second trimester so they just kept saying um oh if it's still you know blocking your cervix you'll just have to have a c-section um but don't worry it's what every single don't worry but don't worry those are the words that i can't really um uh so in my head i was like well that's probably what's gonna happen but so many women have that and then it moves and mine did move but by the time it had moved in my head i was like this is what i envision happening i can't really think of anything else and I love a plan yeah yeah oh do you you're a plan girl I love a plan and I had a I had my whole like birth plan laminated I went fully mental oh you were a first wow we haven't met anyone on a laminated birth plan I haven't ate it and I thought that was a bit normal but it wasn't the midwife was like okay they're probably like oh we've got one of those we've got one of those in the house yeah I bought a laminator specifically to laminate that's hilarious yeah I was yeah it's a good template though because now I can give it to my friends if they haven't asked for actually.

12:05They haven't asked for actually. No one's asked yet, but when they want to. And has that planning like continued into motherhood? Are you, no. I mean, yes, and I don't think you can plan. I think if you set up a strict routine and a strict plan, you're just setting yourself up for failure because babies do not stick to a plan. No. They just don't. I remember, so I laminated my birth plan And then I remember I laminated like how to store breast milk and like all the temperatures for like the sleep togs. And I had it, you know, on the wall and everything. I never looked at it. As soon as she was born, I was like, I can't actually take in information anymore like that.

12:43Your whole brain just completely was rewired. So I just, but I had it all there. Isn't it a beautiful moment of growth when you realize that your life is just going to be chaotic and suddenly you're not in control of the plan anymore. the plan doesn't exist you have to flow and lean into it and listen to what the baby wants and feel things rather than you know some very structured people I think struggle with those early stages because it's just like no hold on now this is when I do this well you can't do that anymore no no did you find it liberating uh not at the start but now I have now I can see like I just I really don't I care about how I look anymore and I find that so like refreshing and quite nice because all I care about is if, you know, what she's wearing and if she's happy and all of that stuff.

13:32Like today is very different. I've got jeans on and like an actual face stuff. Makeup. Makeup. Makeup. So not really caring anymore is quite lovely. We'll be right back after this short break.

13:49Delicious spring gatherings start at Whole Foods Market. Shop the Spring and Bloom sales event with yellow sales signs throughout the store. and serve your loved ones Whole Foods Market seafood, always responsibly farmed or sustainable wild-caught. Explore vibrant seasonal flavors like their trending mango yuzu chantilly cake. Great for brunch or an after-dinner treat. Speaking of brunch, check out their deviled eggs, cold-pressed juices, and more. Spring is in bloom now at Whole Foods Market. A Rayo original podcast. Hello, I'm Pete Wicks, and my podcast, Man Made, is back for Series 2. I'm sitting down with more of my mates and famous faces to talk modern masculinity.

14:31Who we are, who we want to be and how we get there. Am I enough as any of these things? Am I any good at these things? Anger takes the place, I think, for men. Listen to Pete Wick's Man Made Now. New episodes every Wednesday on the Rail App, Apple, Spotify, Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts.

14:52Welcome back to this episode of Made by Mamas. Now, where were we? Talk to us about how you've changed since you became a mum because I think it's something that happens to all of us. It does yeah and it's kind of like that thing where I mean everyone says your life you know your life will change and it's like oh and maybe that's in a way quite terrifying to women when they're told that it might put them off a little bit. I know when people said oh well you know you're like you won't sleep again you won't do anything again you'll never go out. I'm like well I'm out now. Do everything before your life's ruined.

15:24do everything before your life is real i hate that so much anyone say that about bringing a child that you love and wanted into the world like what yeah no that used to really annoy me yeah sleep now because you'll never sleep when they come no that's also not true and also i remember being very pregnant and not sleeping yeah so i mean it's very different when the baby is here and you literally cannot sleep but yeah i remember people always used to say that to me and i was I'm not sleeping now and I'm very much not comfortable. And this is not helpful. How you and Steve navigated parenthood together?

15:57Yeah. So we met in, I think, April or March. And then we got pregnant in December. So it's all happened quite quickly. A lot. A lot. I was going to say, hold on. Yeah, 2023. Wow, 2023. Yeah. How'd you meet? Yeah, Hinge. I nearly got my dating apps rolling there. But yeah, it was Hinge. She's a Hinge baby. a hinge baby so talk to us about that whirlwind then because that that's pretty fast so was that a conversation totally yeah I mean we I was like it was our first date we were like no we both just don't like each other really interesting don't like him you don't like me whatever it's fine I remember he sent me a message after our first date saying um oh uh do you want another to do another date or should we just leave it there that's what he said should we just leave it there and i could have just left him no we've been speaking for a while like i'll we'll do another date we'll just do another and then we were like yep he's he's uh he's that's it we were very happy and um i think i wanted to have the conversation quite early on about having kids and if he wanted a family not saying let's just do it now but i wanted to have that conversation because of I've got an issue I had a cyst in one of my ovaries that burst yeah so my doctor said to me that you and then because of that sorry I need to go back into the burst so it burst and then they did a scan and realized that it was a borderline cyst so I had to have a surgery to remove it and then it made the ovary a lot smaller and then I had to get a scan every year and a blood test and the doctor said to me you know wait until you're 40 before you have a hysterectomy or wait until you've had kids and then have a hysterectomy just get it all wiped out and that was I mean that was 10 years ago so I'm sure if it happened now the advice would be a lot different because things tend to move on change and move on but um I always had that in the back of my head I was like I've got until I'm 40 to have a kids if I want to have kids and I need to tell someone but you know if we want to have kids it kind of needs to be in the plan at least I think everyone should have that conversation did you get the lamination out I didn't get my lunatic.

18:11Does that change how you navigate dating? I think so, yeah. Because it almost has to, there is no time wasting. There's no time wasting. And there's also like, I mean, I had a lot of, you know, relationships that I thought were it, but they just weren't. And you don't really know that until you meet your person. It sounds so cliche, but I didn't really get that until I met Steve. I didn't really feel that, you know, comfort. I know people like, oh, you know, you shouldn't have that comfort. It should always be exciting and all of that. It can be exciting and comfortable. It is exciting and comfortable.

18:45It's, you know, he's like, he just keeps me grounded. He keeps me happy and like steady. It's quite a big conversation. And people probably think that's boring, but I don't. I think it's nice. No, we don't care what other people think anyway. No, we don't. Saying to your partner who you'd only met that year. Yeah. I had exactly the same experience as you. My AMH was through the floor. Doctors were saying you'd never get pregnant naturally. I tried to freeze my eggs. And I remember standing on the steps of the clinic. I'd only met Doz in the – we didn't have our first date in February. This was the September.

19:21And I remember ringing him and being like, it's never going to happen for us. He already had a daughter. And I was like, it's not going to happen for us. They've told me I'll never get pregnant naturally. And he was like, I tell you what, why don't we just have a really great time just trying in the next three months and I was like I see your evil plan here it works I got pregnant at Christmas yeah and but but it was all within one year yeah so similar it's funny isn't it yeah so I think yeah and I wasn't scared either no me neither I really wasn't no so that's how again how you know that it's it's right it's not the best sort of method I wouldn't advise that people do that um yeah we just we just got along with it Have you had any complications since?

19:59No, no, I haven't. I did have a scan show up that there was a cyst when I was living in Singapore. And they were like, we can schedule you in tomorrow and you can just get it whipped out. I was like, no. Had another scan, it was gone. So I feel like it's just very, very strange. And it was always the same scan. It was as a pregnancy, it was an ultrasound. And I remember thinking one day I'm going to go into the hospital, into the same maternity unit because there's not a separate one for women you know which is a whole other conversation and um it'll be a baby instead of you know looking for a cyst yeah then it was so it was yeah is it daunting I guess knowing that at some point you'll have to have a hysterectomy because yeah to be honest I don't know if I will now that's what that's right because it's changed so much I don't know I might be all right um I haven't actually had a scan since I've had Billy So I've not, again, you sort of become the lowest of the list.

20:55I haven't had a scan, just had a shower. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And I'm supposed to go to the dentist because I got one of my teeth, like weirdly is just acting up. I haven't done that. I'm just too focused on her. So yeah, I don't know what it will be now. But if it is that, I've got my girl. So that's fine. Yeah. has your relationship changed with your own mother since becoming a mum definitely talk us about definitely I think there's so much more of an understanding I don't know if you guys have the same with your mums as well but my mum always said to me that you know life didn't really make sense until I was born and all this like cliche la la la didn't know what love was unconditional blah blah blah I was like you know you're just saying that and then I had Billy and I was like oh okay I get it I get it now yeah I get you would literally do anything for them um and I understand that so I think there's a lot of understanding um and I think as well you want to give them everything and I know that's what my mum's always done for me as well just always wanted to give me the best of everything and I have that with Billy it's just it's quite um yeah I can't control myself especially with clothes I'm just what I mentioned I I I she heard that when you were like you know all I all I can all I'm concerned about is you know what she's wearing is she happy is she what she's wearing i know does she look cute oh she's beautiful yeah gorgeous girl yeah and so you wrote your book yeah tell us about that why you know why you wanted to write it what we can expect it's um yeah it's a funny one i remember uh being on a call with my agent when i was 37 weeks pregnant being like yeah so i'll you know we'll do the proposal and we'll get it all set and then i'll just write it um you know when she's sleeping didn't happen no of course not but yeah i remember when we found out we were pregnant we the first thing we did was go to the bookshop because you couldn't it was so early and we both said to each other we wanted to wait until we got an early scan to tell our parents and to tell start telling people um so it was just us in this like bubble and we didn't have anyone to talk to apart from each other so we um steve got like you know pregnancy for men toddlers for for dads how to be a dad and all these like he went away with like eight books and read them within like a month and then I got you know the classic like what to expect when you're expecting and I got a couple of other ones but I didn't find anything on the shelves that was something that was really reassuring and filled with advice that I could relate to in a way because it's not the book that I've wrote is not a how-to guide at all it's not I'm not an expert at all but it is looking back on the advice from generations and I always think you know my mum did this her mum did this I can do this and that's kind of the whole part of the book it's a hand to hold and get you through it I hope name of the book mother to mother I should have said that but yeah when is it out it's out on Thursday the 26th I know it's very very scary how long does it take you to write the book uh so I started writing a pregnancy journal and then I kind of made that more of into a book so I had that the first sort of two three chapters down and then um Billy just didn't sleep she's not a sleeper luckily she sleeps now and I wish I you know could sort of go back in time and tell myself you will sleep again but she wasn't a sleeper and um I could guarantee when she was about five months onwards that she would sleep from seven till 10 so I knew I'd have three hours so that's when I started writing a little bit um but I only really could start writing when I stopped breastfeeding and I was able to sort of give that to to her dad for a longer period of time and my mum helped a lot as well um but yeah it took I would say about a year wow yeah what do you hope um parents will take from the book uh I hope that um I mean I hope a lot of things with it I just hope people read it and feel reassured because there's so much noise just now about how scary it is to be a mom.

24:59And it is scary. It's terrifying. I just hope people will read it and feel better and feel empowered. And there's that whole thing of you're told to trust your gut, but you've never done this before. And you don't know what your gut is. Your gut needs guiding. You need to learn how to trust your gut. Gut guidance. That's our next book. Yeah, that's a good title. yeah it's just um there's a hell of a lot of advice and I found especially um when Billy was born like we did the antenatal classes and all of that and I mean you're just paying money to meet friends which is the best money I've ever spent yeah yeah ever like the two friends I've met they will be friends for the rest of my life and whether they like it or not quite frankly um but yeah the the advice is overwhelming and I remember when I'd given birth um we were discharged with a mountain of leaflets yeah yeah and you know and I just I wasn't in the headspace to read leaflets I just couldn't do that so I went back to um mums which is kind of the whole essence of the book it's listen to people that have done it before that you trust um and for me I luckily I had an amazing midwife uh who helped me so much and she was a mum of twins and I was like cool I'm just gonna bombard her with messages because I could google this stuff but I actually want to listen to someone that I trust who's done it who's done it yeah and that I know and I have two friends before like a bit older than me who've got kids and I use them as google I just kept messaging them and I look I was when I was writing the book I was thinking I'd like to put some of the things I was talking about like very you know meaningful insightful things and it was just me messaging them at 3am like um what do you do if the baby sounds like a warthog but they're sleeping and what do you it's just yeah and videos of her like the startle yeah yeah yeah what is like should I wake you up like what do you need like what do you need what is this yeah you don't know and I didn't want to google that because when you google something it was probably you know you get very negative stuff and you do especially with social media as well but when you hear your friend who's done it and you trust them and you know their little their baby who's gorgeous say no that's normal it's fine it's like okay It's all okay.

27:11We'll be right back after this short break.

27:39dinner treat. Speaking of brunch, check out their deviled eggs, cold pressed juices, and more. Spring is in bloom now at Whole Foods Market. A Rayo original podcast. Hello, I'm Pete Wicks, and my podcast, Man Made, is back for Series 2. I'm sitting down with more of my mates and famous faces to talk modern masculinity. Who we are, who we want to be, and how we get there. Am I enough as any of these things? Am I any good at these things? Anger takes the place, I think, for men. Listen to Pete Wick's Man Made now. New episodes every Wednesday on the Rail App, Apple, Spotify, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts.

28:21Welcome back to this episode of Made by Mamas. Now, where were we? Is there any part of, you know, parenting that you look back, like you look at now, that maybe your mum did as you were growing up, that you think, I will definitely do that? definitely my mum uh and my dad as well whenever they went to her parents evening the teacher would always be like oh these are the grades like blah blah and my mum would be like no is she happy does she have friends and that's exactly what I'm gonna do with Billy 100 % because I don't really I'm not bothered if she's academic or not I just want her to be happy and be nice be kind.

28:58Dossett and I had my husband and I had exactly the same conversation yesterday because he's an academic and a sportsman. Oh, really frustrating. Oh, wow. I mean, he could be a dick, so I'll just throw that in. No, but he's very, very, very hot on the academia. Yeah. And I'm an empath and I'm a connector, so I really don't care if they are no good at maths because if they're kind people and they're the ones that are sticking up for people in the playground or, you know, if they see a bully, they'll go over and, you know, be there for their friends. He was like, yeah, but, you know, what about uni?

29:32what about the grades and i'm like yeah but like first and foremost let's create good humans yeah i think you've got to have a bit of both yeah i think you've got to because otherwise they'll just be like kind dancers you know and you don't and you and you yeah you've got to have both but i think it's interesting that you said that does just is is your is fiancee aligned i'm gonna call i know i keep forgetting that we're getting married because there's just too much going on fiance so funny when we got engaged i said exactly that i was like don't call me that I can't say it properly. No. You can't say, oh, yes, fiance.

30:02I can't say it when I'm trying to say it. Right. Yeah, he is quite aligned with it. We're both, I think he's a lot more cleverer. Cleverer than I am. So you can tell. Christ. He'll be on the ball. He'll be on homework duty, I think. Yeah. Doesn't know it yet, but he will be. You need to have that conversation now. Yeah. That it all sets out. Yeah. You've got to set those things out. You've got to get the contract in place. Listen, you're going to do this and I'm going to do that and you can't back out. Correct. Definitely don't take the homework. Correct. Also, we've just started using Spark tutoring.

30:32Oh, I've heard about that. Oh, my God. So, George has been doing it for a really long time. I have just started using them for Luna. And she's got the most beautiful tutor called Isla. Lovely. Those two are really, really close. And I'm like, oh, this is fantastic. Because Tuesday, after she gets back from school for an hour. Yeah, you just hand her over. I'm not on homework duty. Isla gets to do it. Nice. Love that. Nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You need to put that in the contract to get the laminator out. Yeah, you do, you do. Yeah. But I think what you're saying about having those chats with your partner It's so important.

30:59I kind of wish we had it before Billy was born about feeding, but again, you don't know what you're doing. So you don't even know what conversations you should be having. But yeah, I remember I was sort of demented about breastfeeding and I really wanted to give it a good go. And everyone said to me, you have the first six weeks, that's your, you know, if you, if you get your supply going and those first, that's the rest of your breastfeeding journey it's all dependent on that six weeks pressure um so much pressure and I remember um I went to sleep and Steve had her because she would only sleep if she was on someone so we did it in shifts for the first two weeks which was horrendous but we just we did it and I slept and I remember him waking me up and me sort of being in a daze and it was that it was I don't know if you guys had this when in the newborn stage but I woke up in bed thinking she was in the bed and I was like oh my god what's like your brain is just so off and um he came in he's like i let you sleep a little bit longer and i gave her some formula and i lost i lost my can i swear yeah i lost my shit i went mental because i was like no you have to wake me up if she wants food you come in you wake me up and i feed her and then i sort of took a breath and i was like actually he was being really lovely there yeah that's interesting yeah he was actually being quite nice but i kind of and i maybe didn't say enough to him about how important it was for me to have that to be breastfeeding and doing that but again at the same time like she came out hungry so she had to have formula in the hospital so it's not like her tummy would have been confused by it what was coming up for you then what was what was presenting it was just the not good enough you know not doing this whole thing well enough not being good enough which I think is still mothers now maybe not at every single stage you're not doing it right yeah um but yeah the whole breastfeeding thing for me was just wild it's interesting isn't it because I think if you are so focused on one route like whether that's formula feeding or breastfeeding and you're all in it can feel like a huge disruption if you introduce formula like i remember when i mean i didn't breastfeed for very long at all but i remember what three months four months not with axel with gg i did that was my second i found it much easier probably because the pressure was off but but with axel like i don't know exclusively probably not even a week like maybe two weeks i don't know but not not very long but i remember the first time giving him formula and i genuinely felt like it was poison I cried like it and it's so weird but it's the first thing coming from the outside world it's not you yeah so it feels a bit it's natural to feel that I think but it's not um spoken about enough that it's natural to feel like that no but she I mean I always said that Billy would drink milk out of a deodorant stick she's a hungry girl she's always been a hungry girl still she loves food which is amazing yeah um so she was really happy with the bottle we had to try a few different bottles yeah start which i think is a very nice little tip that's a good tip yeah very good tip um yeah we have spent quite a lot of money on bottles that she didn't use which what which ones did you end up with we ended up with uh tommy tp but then we ended up on man yeah yeah love them man need to sponsor the podcast we talk about them so much they should come on They should sponsor everything.

34:23They really, yeah, love them. Brilliant. I say that to people now that are having kids. I'm like, get a man. Just go straight to them. Go straight to man. Has there been anything else that's come up being parents that you've realized that you're maybe not aligned on? Oh, I don't know. I think it's really hard for dads. I think maybe it's not spoken about enough with the bond, especially with breastfeeding. because Billy was just, she just wants me. It was so lovely. But he, I think, didn't get that bond and still hasn't really. I mean, the past week she's just been saying no a lot and I think he takes it to heart a wee bit.

35:05Yeah. And she's saying mama a lot and she's like, she'll cuddle me. She'll be in my arms and I'll be like, do you want to go and see your dad so I can go maybe for a wee? And he'll put his arms out and she's just like, no. and wants to cuddle me yeah and I know it's not it's gonna change because I keep saying that to him I'm like this will change it will get better but I think that's something that two of us didn't really realize and I think it's so important to sort of and I kept saying this to him as well when she was tiny tiny that when they're born up to about six months I think they still think that they're a part of you yeah how weird is that isn't it mad I didn't know that either so I kept saying that to him i was like she doesn't know that you're like anything really at the moment yeah she will yeah i do think it will and i think the proper dad time to shine is when she'll be you know toddling around wanting to go to the swings and stuff like that and he does that with her he goes to the swings he's like oh this is nice yeah yeah it's nice do it more often then i can have more showers yeah do more face things yeah totally totally um what is we always ask our guests this on the podcast what's the piece of advice that you'd like to share with another parent that you've learned in your year of motherhood oh my god the nurse said this to me um she said every new mother should have the words everything is temporary tattooed on the forehead but i think it should be on your arm because you can actually see it yeah um that is the key piece for me and like something i wish i knew a bit a bit sooner but it's good and bad because um yeah because the good stuff is temporary that's that yeah yeah totally but I mean I think she just didn't sleep she wasn't a sleeper and I remember everyone telling me about you know the four months sleep regression well I'm like what's the point of a regression when she doesn't need to sleep so I'm always remembering that you know everything is temporary yeah and the sleep is part of that yeah it's a huge thing huge thing and you mentioned the man bottles but products yeah we haven't been at your stage of parenting for a long time now.

37:07So we need to know what's new. What should people be buying? The best thing that we got was this like sleeping bag pod. Oh, yeah. And it had straps so we could just carry her around. That's cute. We used to put her on the table so that we could eat. What brand is it? I think it's Nouvelle. Oh, okay. I think it's Najeel. Najeel. Yeah, Najeel. It's the best thing ever. and if you expand it, it becomes a play mat. Oh, nice. So it was really lovely. That was my, like, we called her a baby in a bag. Like a chicken in a bag. Literally, she was a baby in a bag. We would go to my parents' house, we'd always have the baby in the bag and she'd be sat on the table so that we could eat our dinner for 10 minutes before she kicked off.

37:52So yeah, it was funny. And also there's a towel for, I don't know if you guys had it, but it was a towel for bath time and it's got like a strap. so you strap it around your head and it's all the way down

38:06dreamy I was in the wash the other week and I didn't use it and I was like oh god what am I going to do use a normal towel how did they cope and your book you said again just tell us when it's out it's out on the 26th of February everyone needs to go and buy it mother to mother Amazon Amazon, Waterstones Foils, TG the new WHM TG Jones TG Jones Thank you so much And good luck with the book And I've seen you're doing a few talks Yeah thank you, we're going up to Scotland Brilliant Got to take Billy up at any opportunity She's had a potato scone once She loved it Of course she did Rosie thank you so much for coming on Thank you Rosie Thank you.

39:25Now. New episodes every Wednesday on the Rail app, Apple, Spotify, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts.