4 Money Lessons From the Stars of Selling Sunset

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0:33Nicole Lapin:Let's be those businesses. Head to usbank.com and let's build something strong together. That's the power of us. Member FDIC. Copyright 2026, U.S. Bank. If you're a small business, the right hire can be make or break. Hoping the right people see your job posting isn't the best growth strategy. When the pressure's on and you need the right hire, this is a job for sponsored jobs. Indeed, sponsored jobs gets you quality candidates when you need them most. Stop struggling to get your job post even seen on other sites. Sponsored jobs boosts your job post in search results so you can reach the people that can help your business thrive.

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1:50Nicole Lapin:And listeners of this show will get a$75 sponsored job credit to help get your job the premium status it deserves at Indeed.com slash podcast. Just go to Indeed.com slash podcast right now and support our show by saying you heard about Indeed on this podcast. Indeed.com slash podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Hiring now? Then this is a job for Indeed-sponsored jobs. This summer took me from a conference in France to some of the most beautiful beaches in the Pacific. every destination had its own rhythm, from quiet mornings by the ocean to evenings spent discovering local cafes, hidden restaurants, and places you'd never find unless you were there.

2:27Nicole Lapin:Back home, my city was hosting some of the biggest games in the world. While I loved trading packed stadiums for sandy beaches, I also knew thousands of fans were traveling in for the opposite reason, eager to soak up the atmosphere and be part of the excitement. That's why I listed our space on Airbnb. And what makes that idea feel much more manageable now is the co-host network. You can connect with a local co-host who has hosting experience and can help take care of the important details. A co-host can help create your listing, manage reservations, message guests, and make sure everything runs smoothly for guests during their stay.

3:01Nicole Lapin:Honestly, it just feels like a practical way to make better use of our space while also bringing in a little extra cash from time to time. If you're interested in hosting and want help getting started, find a co-host at airbnb.com slash host. I'm Nicole Lapin, the only financial expert you don't need a dictionary to understand. It's time for some money real.

3:31Nicole Lapin:Selling Sunset is one of the top shows on Netflix. And I know for some people it's a show all about real estate or the drama or the outfits. But to me, it's a show all about money. And you know what? I have had a front row seat over the past couple of years. I've had four cast members of the Selling Sunset Universe on Money Rehab, Jason Oppenheim, Emma Hernan, Mary Bonet and Polly Brindle. And today I'm going to be pulling out four moments from those conversations that I have not been able to stop thinking about. My takeaway from my conversation with Jason Oppenheim was unsurprisingly about real estate.

4:03Nicole Lapin:But the tip itself was a huge surprise. Here's the thing about Jason. He is one of the most successful real estate brokers in Los Angeles. He founded the brokerage that Selling Sunset is all about. His firm has about$5 billion in total sales. And when I sat down with him, he said something that put my jaw on the floor because I have never, ever heard a real estate broker admit this. Okay, so let me set the scene for what was happening in the interview. We were talking about renting versus buying. And as you know by now, I do believe that renting can make more sense for some people than buying, depending on your situation.

4:38Nicole Lapin:The idea that renting is throwing away money makes me insane. So I was ready for Jason to come for me and argue with me, but he didn't. People come for me so hard when I say that renting is not throwing away money. It's not at all. I never understood that argument that buying and first of all, renting is, I would argue, is throwing away less money than buying. Well, because you throw away money somewhere. You give the bank interest. Yeah, you're either giving it to interest or you're giving it to your landlord. I don't think it, why don't you just call the bank president your landlord? And then it's the same thing.

5:15It just doesn't make sense. I've never understood that, throwing away money. I really don't. In fact, when you buy, you're tied down. So you actually have less physical mobility because you now have to, if you want to move when you're renting, you don't have commissions. You don't have transfer taxes. You don't have to move all the furniture and goods. I mean, you'd be renting a furnished place. You're much more mobile. That is inherently valuable. And it costs less to rent right now than it does to buy because interest rates are higher. So yeah, I never understood that. I'm a big believer in renting.

5:55There's a psychological pride of ownership, But if you just look at it financially, no, renting makes more sense than buying and always has. Unless you think that the market is going to appreciate and then buying makes more sense. That's the only reason that you would buy from a purely financial perspective is if you want to leverage your loan because you think that there's going to be market appreciation. And historically, there has been market appreciation.

6:26Nicole Lapin:But not as much as the stock market. You would be better off buying a house if you think that real estate is going to appreciate even 5 % a year. Even if you thought the stock market was going to appreciate 7 % a year and the real estate was only going to appreciate 5 % a year, then you're better off buying. There are a lot of people, I'd say just about everyone, I'd say 90 % of my clients would have been better off renting for the last 10 years than buying. Why? Because they are making no money because the market's back to where it was 8, 10 years ago. and they didn't have the mobility. They had all the problems with fixing up the house and the stress of fixing up the house.

7:06And they didn't, and they have to pay commissions to me. They have to pay property taxes. They have to pay the mansion tax. So they would have been better off renting for the last eight years. I mean, that's just a fact. This is a financial fact.

7:18Nicole Lapin:So just to sum this up, this is a real estate broker, someone who makes money selling properties, telling you that renting is often a smarter financial move. That is the equivalent of a personal trainer telling you that the gym might not be worth your membership fee. Here's his core argument. The only reason financially to buy a home over rent a home is if you believe the market will appreciate. And in a market like Los Angeles over the last decade, that bet has not paid off the way most people expected. Now, does this mean you should never buy? Absolutely not. but it does mean that buying is not the one-size-fits-all American dream we've been told to believe.

7:59Nicole Lapin:And to have a real estate goat confirm that? That means a lot. Now, the story from Mary Bonet is a hard but important one. She told me the story about a previous marriage. Her now ex-husband opened credit cards in her name in secret, ran up close to$100 ,000 in debt, and left her to come home to a credit score of under 500. She had to file for bankruptcy. see this conversation is so important not just because of what happened to mary but because of what she did next and what she spotted in hindsight that every woman needs to hear before she finds herself in a similar situation so you guys were romantic partners and then business partners is that right yeah and then yeah we got married everything was in my name i had amazing credit at the time i was like like 8 15 or something like that so you had all-star credit i did not for long not by the time that relationship was over.

8:54Nicole Lapin:So you guys started a business after you got married. Yeah. He started it when we were still dating, when we were engaged, but everything had to be in my name. Any of the business purchases, stuff like that, everything had to be in my name because it was because he was foreign. He was from the UK, so he didn't really have much credit. ultimately that business folded can you tell that story yeah he took on one big big job and that one was not his fault the guy just stopped paying like all of his he would just hire subcontractors and then have him do the work and not pay and then get somebody else in so there were a ton of mechanical leads on the property he didn't care he wasn't gonna like sell or do anything so he just kept doing it.

9:41And so we got screwed out of a lot of money. Um, and he took on another big job. We were able to do it. We took out of personal savings to make sure we could pay everybody, stuff like that. He took on another really big job. It was like a hotel. And I was like, this is not a good idea. That's going to be hard. Well, that one ended up going South. Something got messed up and it just basically took us down. It was right around that time that things were really struggling between me and him. Like he'd become abusive at that time, started going to therapy and his dad got sick, got cancer. And so he was back in the UK and we just decided, well, let's make a move or he can go be with his dad, restore that relationship.

10:26We can make a fresh start. My son was up for it. And so we moved over to England.

10:31Nicole Lapin:And you say that's when the financial control really started. Yes. Yes. So when you go over there, we had to come back and then get our visa because he told us we would get it when we get there, but they don't allow you to do that. We had to come back to the States and then get approved to the end and go back in. But we sold everything here, transferred all the money. So all the money was over in an account for him because they won't let you get a bank account until you have a proper spousal visa. And it took about a month or two for us to get it. So we came back, stayed with my mom, Austin and I.

11:04And when we went over there, we'd already transferred the money. We didn't realize, and I never really got any of that money back. And he would be very stingy with it. And I would have to ask for things. And it took a while before I was able to make my own money. So I started working, make my own money. And then And in the meantime, I found out once I came back to the States that he'd also taken a bunch, just ran up a bunch of credit cards and stuff, got credit cards in my name. Because I closed almost all accounts when I was here. I still had credit cards, but I didn't know those weren't the ones he opened new credit cards.

11:44But since we didn't have an address in the States, I wasn't being notified of anything. I didn't have an address. He just ran up a whole bunch of stuff in my name.

11:53Nicole Lapin:So it started with you having to ask for even buying groceries. Yeah. And that's when it sounds like financial abuse started. Yeah. Which oftentimes goes hand in hand with other types of abuse. I had both. I'm sorry that you went through that. It's okay. I mean, for better or worse, I think the way money is used in relationships affects our confidence and our sense of control. Yeah. Do you remember what that time was like when you lost control? And I won't put words in your mouth, but maybe confidence around money. I have a money twitch. It's because of this. And I physically get a twitch like where if it's something super expensive or something, I was like, and I actually get a little twitchy thing like that because I'm irked by it.

12:42It's a physical thing because of what it's like, just like the trauma from what it happens.

12:47Nicole Lapin:For women listening, what kind of red flags now in hindsight would you say that Drew showed you when it came to financial abuse that women should look out for? The frivolous spending. His habits. His habits, yeah. He was not responsible. And he knew there wasn't that much money. He would just buy things that were so expensive or over the top where I'm like, you don't need that. Why are you doing that? unless you have money to burn like why are you buying something so big and so expensive if that's gonna break you and he was like oh no I'll just make more I don't know and it would just irk me if I was like okay it's not my money because it was before we shared finances that should have warned me it was just always pushing non-bluff just to be like he would have this like really flashy car and then lived in this little apartment so it's caught up it didn't no and it was just always trying it's like showy stuff and so he would do stuff that was just not responsible i think those are really big signs because if he does it then when you guys start sharing finances it's going to continue except that's also going to be your money it's such an important point and I think oftentimes we justify it and we're in love and we have rose-curred glasses on and it's hard to see the signs when you're in the thick of it.

14:10It is. It's very hard. And I luckily have recovered from that. I keep separate finances. Like I trust Romaine, but I have separate finances from Romaine and I always will. We can have one joint account, but I will never let that happen to me again. It was so brutal and it took so long to climb out of it and you can't control somebody else. so I can control me and I can control my kids. So that's what I'm doing.

14:34Nicole Lapin:This is what really sticks with me. The red flags were there before the marriage, the flashy car and the tiny apartment, the habit of spending big money he did not have. Like she said, if he does it before you share finances, he will do it after, except now it's also your money. I also want to highlight the tactical choice that she made. After bankruptcy, she started with a secured credit card with a$500 limit. She put everything she could on it and paid it off constantly. And this is so important. She found out exactly when her credit issuer reported to the credit bureaus each and every month and made sure her balance was low before that date.

15:16Nicole Lapin:That matters because your score is calculated based on the snapshot of your balance at reporting time, not your average balance, not your payment history alone. Timing your payments to hit before the reporting date can meaningfully improve your credit score even when you're rebuilding from zero. One more thing I love about Mary's story is that she got a prenup before her next marriage. She said something that I want to put on a t-shirt. When you're happy and when you're in love, that's when you decide what's fair. Now the lesson from Emma Hernan is for any entrepreneur who's thinking about raising capital.

15:51Nicole Lapin:Emma is someone the internet has spent a lot of energy underestimating. Off camera, she has built a multi-million dollar good business and has turned down acquisition offers and outside investments deliberately. Business culture has become so obsessed with the shark tank effect of it all, the VC money, the huge fundraising rounds. But Emma breaks down the flaws with that approach. How have you dealt with the CPG challenges and what should somebody who's looking at the space know about it? For sure. I mean, I think the CPG space in general is a difficult space to get into. And now there's a lot of companies that are starting up and then, you know, they're going out of business and a lot of companies are, you know, they're raising capital right away.

16:30And I think that that's fine because we're in that shark tank mentality. But a lot of times when it's not their own money, they're not good with it. And we ran into that with one of the companies that came to us to Copac. You know, they were getting so much money from all these investors and they weren't allocating it right. And we were thinking in our heads, this was our money. We would be doing it way different. We'd be much more reserved. Like you just because you have it, you don't spend it. And it is other people's money. And so they ended up shutting down. And a lot of times that is the case.

17:00You know what I mean? You have to treat it like it's your own money. I will say if you're going to go out and you want to do a raise and you want to get money from other people, you have to treat it like it's your own. I think that's only fair. So that's definitely advice that I would give to anyone starting a CPG company. If you want people to invest in your company, then treat the money like it's your own. For me, I bootstrapped everything myself. I haven't taken a penny. I've turned down millions of dollars from people wanting to invest because it was really important for me to get to a certain point by myself.

17:30And I have. I bootstrapped everything from packaging. And when I say like packaging, I am down doing the photo shoot. I have the photographer and I don't hire a food stylist. I cook and do everything myself. So I like being hands on. And I do think that that makes a difference. I love that you say that because I think that the raising money, the Shark Tank effect has been glorified so much.

17:51Nicole Lapin:I bootstrapped my business too. I put in at the time my life savings and I felt every dollar. No, it's so different when you're bootstrapping it yourself and everything is yours. You care more about where the money is going and I think you should always care. So I think if you're going to decide to do a raise, I think you have to treat it like you're bootstrapping it. You know what? I bootstrapped my company too. I put in my entire life savings and I felt every single dollar because it was mine. That's Emma's point. When you're spending other people's money, you spend differently. She watched a company come through her co-packing facility, flush with investor cash, allocating it recklessly, and ultimately it shut down.

18:29Nicole Lapin:Meanwhile, she's been building the same way she was since she was a teenager stuffing money in her stock drawer. That does not mean never raise capital. For some businesses at some stages, outside investment is the right move. But if you do take it, Emma's rule is non-negotiable. Treat it like your own money. Your accountability is the exact same, even if the check came from someone else. Now, last but certainly not least, here's what I learned from Polly Brindle. Polly's financial backstory is not what you'd expect from someone on a glossy Netflix real estate show. She moved to L.A. on a visa, went through a four-year divorce, lost all three of her jobs when COVID hit, and maxed out three credit cards.

19:06Nicole Lapin:She is so refreshingly honest about that time in her life, and a lot of people related to it. Then she cold emailed Jason Oppenheim before she even had her real estate license. She got hired to pass her exam on the first try and within a few years, she has closed$48 million in sales. The moment I want you to hear is the one where she talks about what she would tell her past self because it's a piece of advice that I would have wanted to hear when I was doing my own money rehab. Did you have savings that you were living on? I didn't. I had a lot of debt. I had a lot of debt and I was kind of chasing my tail on that and I very much was head in the sand about that for years like I was making all of the hideous financial you know mistakes that you probably see an advice against you know I had three max credit cards and I was like barely paying the minimum each month for years like four years and then it just increased over COVID because you weren't well they were I mean they were all max so I was just like okay well I'm kind of fucked like you know I I've kind of you know my credit score was horrible I just for me I was very much on autopilot of just like just pay just be able to pay rent and my pet insurance and let's talk about that you prioritize pet insurance yes My dog has had pet insurance for 11 years and I probably went without health insurance for seven of those years.

20:39I'd rather him have the health insurance. It's paid off.

20:42Nicole Lapin:I usually advise against pet insurance. I know, but now it's like, I don't want to jinx it. And now it goes up and now he's 11. And so I'm paying like$160 a month and I've never used it. Do you have health insurance? I do. Okay, good. So it's not like your priority? No, no. But like, you know, with, with my dog, I've had it for so long. I know that if I cancel it, he's going to break his fucking leg and I'll be like, shit, like I can't cancel it now. So I'm paying thousands of dollars each year for nothing. And I know it, but I can't cancel it because it jinx it. And I just can't. So I'm like, okay, fine.

21:21Nicole Lapin:So how did you get more credit on your cards if you were maxed out or did you take out a personal loan or a business loan? I never did the personal loan but I borrowed from friends I'm not from money so borrowing from family was never really an option people definitely were very kind and lent me money which I've paid everyone back that was you know definitely something that that helped me a good few months there to just survive you know but I never gave up ever like I was just kind of like okay like this is just for now and I'll work it out I always do leave the shame at the door like what's happened has happened and there's no point it only makes it worse if you bury your head in the sand if you're not honest with yourself about your situation and if you're honest with yourself about that you know because we see people pretending that they're something that they're not and that they live this lifestyle and when you get down to it it's like you're you've got to be real you know shame is the most expensive financial habit that most people have and it only compounds over time here's what happens when you're ashamed of your money situation you avoid looking at it you don't open the statements you don't log into the accounts you pay the minimum and you tell yourself that you'll deal with it next month poly did this for years most people do and every month you avoid it the problem just gets bigger and bigger and the shame gets heavier and heavier.

22:49Nicole Lapin:What Polly did and what ultimately turned her financial life around was simple but not easy. She decided to look at the number, even when that number was bad, to stop running from it and to start making a plan. Financial shame is not a character flaw. It's a systemic failure of how we teach people about money. But the antidote is not more guilt, it's more honesty. You can't fix what you refuse to see. So those are four things that I keep replaying over and over in my head. From Jason, the rent versus buy debate is way more nuanced than your parents taught you. The right answer really depends on your market, your timeline, and whether or not you actually believe prices are going to go up.

23:27Nicole Lapin:From Mary, financial red flags show up before the marriage. Know when your credit card issuer reports to the bureaus, time your payments accordingly, and also get a prenup. From Emma, bootstrapping builds discipline that outside capital cannot buy. Treat every single dollar like it came out of your own pocket. And from Polly, try to leave shame at the door. You can't fix what you don't look at. For today's tip, you can take straight to the bank. Definitely ask your credit card issuer for the statement closing date, not your payment due date. That's the date that your issuer takes a snapshot of your balance and then reports it to the credit bureaus.

24:02Nicole Lapin:If your balance is high on that date, your credit utilization ratio spikes and your score usually drops, even if you pay in full a week later. The move is to make a payment a few days before the closing date so your reported balance is near zero. Try to do this consistently and your utilization, which makes up 30 % of your FICO score, will drop. This means that your score will climb and you'll also unlock better rates on everything from mortgages to car loans to business loans. It's the kind of thing your credit card company will never tell you, but Mary Bonet figured it out the hard way so that you don't have to.