MY SHOWER THOUGHTS (that got way too deep)

0:00Hi, everybody. I'm Sam and this is my sister's diary.

0:13Hello everybody, welcome back to another episode of My Sister's Diary. I'm your host Sam and today we're talking about shower thoughts and specifically my shower thoughts because I have a lot. I've been thinking really deeply lately about things. I don't know. I've just been really like introspective and I don't know what it is, but I have some things that I need to talk about. So that's what I'm going to talk about. They're very random, but also very important, I guess you can say. But before we do that, I have a couple of things really quick. I'm just starting. I'm not even going to like ease you guys into this episode.

0:54I'm just going. So if you're new here, welcome. if you're not new here thank you for being here again thank you thank you thank you a couple things really quick um that I need to talk about before I dive into shower thoughts because I have I have a lot I have 10 I have 10 thoughts that I'm going to share with you and I'm going to talk a lot this episode I have a lot to say I guess I always have a lot to say but I have a lot to say specifically about these things so I will keep the kind of life updates a little are pounding around upstairs. So sorry if you hear thumping, that's my children. Okay.

1:32So first, my baby, he just turned one, as you guys know. And he, every time I change his diaper, it specifically, okay, sorry. I'm going to talk about poop. Cover your ears if you don't like it. Every time he poops and I change his diaper, the very first thing he does, as soon as air touches his skin, he shoves his hand down to his butt and tries to touch the poop every single time. I'm not kidding. Without fail, he does this. And every once in a while, I'm like, you know what? I can handle it, but I should not try to do it by myself. I should always have help. I should always have someone who holds his hands while I do this because every time he sticks his hand down there and then one time, oh, this is, if you have a weak stomach, this is disgusting and you might want to skip past about 15 seconds.

2:19But he one time stuck his hand down there. It was a bad diaper okay he stuck his hand down there and then what does he do what do babies do with their hands guys they stick them in their mouth he sticks his hand in his mouth with the poop on it it was the most disgusting thing that I've ever experienced as a parent and I have three kids and this is my third kid so yeah that was that was horrifying and I screamed a little but today specifically he just he'll grab things if there's anything close to him he'll grab it and like be like hmm this needs poop on it like he grabbed the bag of wipes and just like shoved it down to his butt.

2:54Anyway, okay, let's stop talking about my baby's poop. Let's move on. I've recently discovered that it's, you know, it's summer. I've been wearing shorts a lot. I've discovered that shaving my legs actually feels kind of good. Like having clean shaven legs feels nice. And I think I've never noticed this before because I never lotion my legs like ever. Like if I have to do one more step after I, I mean, it's already like a chore for me to get in the shower. I hate showering in the first place once I'm in there I'm like wow this is really nice but like actually getting into the shower I have to give myself a pep talk every single time once I get in the shower once I'm out I'm like I'm done I'm done showering I don't want to do anything else I always put moisturizer on my face but lately I'm like okay let's just do one more thing and put some lotion on your legs okay and your cracked heels because that's they're they're starting to catch on the sheets and it's becoming a actually no they don't because I wear socks but they're starting to catch on the carpet I'm just kidding but yeah anyway I've been putting lotion on my legs and my legs feel really nice and smooth and it's taken me almost 30 years to realize that I that that that is nice that is having soft legs is nice I mean who knew who knew that that's why people shave their legs I don't shave my legs for other people I shave my legs for me hence why I didn't use to shave them very often because I'm like I don't really care but now that I've realized that like having smooth legs, it feels good because of the lotion.

4:22I'm like, you know, I'm all for it. Okay. All right. Next thing. This is more of like a matter of business. Um, I am trial running a little program where I will have ads inserted into my episodes and I don't know exactly what ads they are. Um, the, the place, the thing that I'm using chooses for me. And so that's kind of nerve wracking, but anyway, I think that there'll be one in the middle of the podcast and then one at the very end of the podcast. So hopefully that goes well. If it's not working out, if the ads are really weird and don't align with my content enough, then maybe we'll try and go in a different direction.

4:59But I just want to give you guys a warning if you're like, well, what is this? That's what it is. So yeah, thank you guys for your support. Honestly, I wouldn't be able to do the ads without you guys. So seriously, thank you. Thank you. Thank you for listening and sticking around. Those of you who have stuck around, if you haven't stuck around and you're not listening anymore, well, then I can't talk to you because you're not listening. But anyway, I hope you come back. All right. Oh, last thing, matter of business. I need to out myself here. I've been really inconsistent about the times that I've been posting the episode.

5:33When I first started, it was up Tuesday morning, every single morning at like 4 a.m. and I was on the dot. But during the summer months, I've gotten a little behind and sometimes I'm recording the episode Monday night or sometimes Tuesday morning and not getting the episode out until later in the afternoon. And not that it's like a rushed episode or not putting thought into the episode. It's that I'm not finding the time to record the episode. So I've made a few changes with my schedule and I'm going to it's going back every Tuesday morning. You guys are going to see my sister's diary pop on your pop up on your podcast and you'll have an episode to listen to every Tuesday morning.

6:11That's going to start happening. I really am so sorry about my inconsistency. That's not something I even wanted to start doing with this podcast. I wanted to always be consistent. So I'm really bummed out. Well, disappointed. Disappointed in myself for letting myself do that. But I'm recommitting to being better. Okay, let's move on. Let's go ahead and dive into my shower thoughts. And like I said, I have 10 of them. And some of them, I did a little bit of research on the internet okay I did some research on the internet I haven't done that since like well like voluntarily I mean I do internet research every day because I look stuff up on Google and that counts but I mean sorry my I'm wearing a real bra today and my ta-tas are just a little bit too big for it still so if you're watching the video and you see you're like whoa Sam you have three of those I apologize anyway back to my shower thoughts um I did internet research for some of these.

7:05And yeah, you guys should be proud of me. Say good job, Sam. Okay, let's move on. Okay. I'm sorry. I don't know why I always say let's move on. Let's dive into shower thoughts. The first one, like I said, I have 10. Number one, I don't think we were meant to see ourselves this much. What I'm talking about here is like reflections. I don't think we were meant to see our reflection as much as we do. Think about your everyday life. You probably look in the mirror, I don't know, 10 times at least. Like you wake up in the morning, you go to the bathroom, you look in the mirror. And every time you go to the bathroom, you probably look in the mirror, right?

7:39I'm right. Yeah, I know I'm right. And then if you're like me, you also send Snapchats to your, you know, younger generation siblings. And that's the only way you can communicate with them is through Snapchat. So you have to see yourself on Snapchat. And it's a lot. It's a lot seeing myself all the time and you know i don't think that we were meant to i don't think that human beings were meant to see ourselves as much and then i got thinking um like who invented this who invented mirrors and i know you guys are like literally nature because of reflections i know i'm not stupid the internet told me that a legend legend has it that a woman in the ancient himalayas stumbled across a little puddle you say it says a stream that stopped flowing so i'm assuming it means a puddle and she looked into it and she was like who's that who's that who is that looking who's that girl i see staring back at me you know she had one of those moments and it took her a while to be like that's me and like trying to figure out how how she's seeing herself i'm sure that was so trippy if you've never seen yourself before to look into something and see a reflection and not even know that it's a reflection, you have no idea what it is.

8:53So that's what the legend has. That's the first time somebody saw themselves. And I don't know how anyone could possibly know that. So I'm sure someone just made that up, but I'm going to go with it. And then I was like, well, when was the actual mirror made? And Google, actually furniturelibrary.com, very legit, says that the ancient Egyptians as early as, you guys get this, as early as 2900 BC. That's before Christ. And you guys know when Christ came? Uh, 2025 years ago. So I'm not going to do the math because I'll embarrass myself, but like almost 6 ,000 ish. Well, like 5 ,500 maybe ish years ago.

9:34That's when people started looking at themselves. And I'm also convinced that during that time, it was like a rarity. Like when this, when ancient Egyptians first they weren't glass mirrors like we have today they were um polished bronze that they made in two flat discs so kind of like a mirror but it was you know when you go into those bathrooms at like a park and it's not really a mirror it's just like a shiny piece of metal and you're supposed to supposedly see yourself in them that's what i'm guessing this kind of was so it's still kind of distorted people didn't really know what the heck they were looking at and people probably didn't look at them 15 000 times a day they probably didn't have them in bathrooms they probably just had them for the rich people who wanted to look at themselves i don't know um and then in let's see I don't know I did look up when glass mirrors were chained were made but I didn't write that down so anyway it got me thinking why why do we feel like we need to look at ourselves so much is it because we're vain like is it because we're vain we need to see ourselves or like truly does it help us um have a better sense of self do you know what I mean like my reflection like when I think about myself I picture myself like my face you know what I mean like when I'm being introspective looking in I do picture myself and so if I can imagine if I didn't have that that that part of my like sense of self would be gone so I do think that maybe it has a purpose in that way but also I think it may contribute to vanity and the obsession of appearance in today's world.

11:06Like think about it. Would people still want to get like nose jobs or upper bleph? I think is what people are calling it where they like remove some skin from their eyelid and yeah. Or like a brow lift or Botox. Would people still want that stuff if we didn't see ourselves all the time? Probably not. Probably not. So yeah, I'm challenging myself a little bit here. You guys do whatever the heck you want. I don't care. I don't care if you guys get plastic surgery. I don't care what anyone does with their appearance. Trigly, honestly. but for myself I'm going to try to not look in the mirror as much and try to not be nitpicking myself because I've been thinking a lot I think having a daughter really changed the game for me having sons also but like I can understand a daughter because I'm also a woman and she's a woman and I can I can understand her life experience a little better because I am a woman and so she and I just think that having a daughter and like looking in the mirror and being so mean to myself I'm like what if I grow up what if what if my daughter grows up and she has the same nose as me and I'm here just talking about how ugly I think my nose is I would never ever and I truly don't think I would ever look at her and be like you have an ugly nose so like why am I saying that to myself when we may have the same exact nose does that make sense like I would never I see someone else with the same features that I do, like my daughter or my sons even.

12:31And I'm like, I love those parts about you. Like I love your, like I have this little indent underneath my lip that were my chin. And when I was in high school, it made me really insecure because I thought it made me look, my face look chubbier. And then when my first baby was born, I remember my husband saying, he has your chin. And I was like, oh my gosh, he does. And it's literally the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life. And that really helped me be like, you know what? My chin's not bad. Like, I don't like look at it on this other human and I love it. Okay. Let's move on from mirrors. You know, every time I think about mirrors, I think of the Justin Timberlake song and it's actually kind of a banger.

13:08Like, did you guys know it's like eight minutes long though? No way. I downloaded it one time and I'm like, I'm not listening to this. It's the same where it's over and over again for eight minutes. There's a radio version. I think it's called, there's a different version. There's a shorter version that we should all be listening to. ain't nobody going to be listening to that for eight minutes straight it is a banger though okay next this one's kind of deep well they're all kind of deep but anyway it says when I die other people are going to have to go through my stuff and decide what to keep and what to throw away this you're like well duh Sam that's what people do when you die but think about it um it doesn't even matter if I give people a list of things like like I have a box in our house my husband has one too and my kids I've started one for them and they can decide when they're older if they want to keep this stuff I put in it or not but I have a box when I was a kid we called it our special box and it's just basically like keepsakes and stuff that I want to keep and look back on and who's to say when I die that someone will go through my special box and be like this is the stupidest thing I've ever seen why why would you want to keep this like I have this monkey it's like a has velcro on the hands and the feet and you can like put it around your neck and it's yellow but it's like really dingy ugly yellow now and for some reason it means a lot to me and I can't even remember for sure where I got it but I had it when I was a kid I was obsessed with it and it's in my special box and some people will probably look at that and be like I'm not keeping this because it's trash but to me it matters so it's weird because I could I could have a literal list of things that I want to keep or a literal box of stuff that I've kept my whole life and someone could go through that and be like this holds no significance to me and so I'm throwing it away which is if you think about it it's like they'll keep the stuff that holds hold significance to them if that makes sense like trying to think of something um like my my uh my great grandpa passed away I got this he used to polish rocks and stones and stuff and I thought that was really cool and I got this uh stone from him that's like it's polished and you put it in your pocket and you like rub it and it's called a worry stone and so I don't actually use it for that it's just in my special box but whatever and I keep that because it like helps remind me of him but like who knows if that rock had any sort of significance to him at all I think we just found it in his shop and I was like I want that so I don't know it's crazy to think of what what people will want to keep of mine and what people will think is absolute absolute garbage because I don't know it's weird it's weird to think that someone else might look at something that I've literally kept my whole life and loved my whole life.

15:45And it has like this really special, important meaning to me. And like, I didn't write it down or whatever. Or even if I did write it down, someone's like, I don't really care until they throw it away. I'm like, well, what, why the heck did I save it my whole life? You know what I mean? Okay, next one. This one is, this one's kind of two part. It's, it's three and four, three and four. They're kind of different, but kind of similar. So bear with me. The first one is, am I in the background of someone's photo that's like a core memory photo? The photos I'm talking about are like, you know, when you go on family vacation and you're standing in front of, I've never been to Disneyland with my family, but this is just an example that I'm thinking of, of like the Disneyland castle and your whole family's there and you're all dressed in your Disneyland ears.

16:27And there's probably somebody just waltzing around in the background and they may be picking their nose. They may be doing something weird. They may just be standing there. And that person is forever a part of your core memory photo. The photo that's going to get shown to your kids, it's going to get shown to your grandkids, your grandkids may put it in like a PowerPoint about you. And it's just this random person. And I am probably in the background of somebody's important photo, you know, even if it's like, and maybe I know that maybe I don't, maybe it's like high school graduation, and I'm in the background of somebody's graduation photo.

16:58And that photo is going to be shown to so many people that I don't even know, which is crazy to think because that's like a really important moment for that person and for me it was just like I was walking and that's it like it held no significance to me truly because I wasn't in the photo like posing you know what I mean so that's that's it that blows my mind I was really I was actually legitimately legitimately thinking about that in the shower yesterday I was like what if you know photos sometimes you look in the background you're like look at this person like what if I'm doing something really embarrassing in the background of someone's photo and they bring it up every family reunion to like remember that girl in the background of our lagoon picture who was picking a wedgie remember that that was so funny yeah that could be me that could be me uh the other part to this number four number four shower thought is am I a part of somebody's core memory so not just like in the photo but like am I a part of their actual memory like when I was a kid or when I was a teenager or even now it's trippy to think about it because their perception of me and like that memory for them could be something it's something I can't even control like I have no control over it who they perceive me as or remember me as might be something totally different might be something completely different than who I perceive myself as and there's nothing I can do about it that's just there that is me in their mind does that make sense like I can't control how other people perceive me and that's just it that's it.

18:27I can't change it for them. They perceive me as whatever it is and that's in their mind and maybe we're not close anymore or whatever it is. And so I'm just like that permanent person in their mind that they remember me as. And maybe it's not even who I perceive myself as. Does that make sense? I'm going to ask that a lot during this because these shower thoughts are things that are like kind of disconnected thoughts that I'm like putting together. That's why the shower thoughts, because I'm trying to make sense of them. So hopefully you guys are understanding what I'm saying. Okay. Yeah, let's see what else did I write.

19:04Yeah, basically, I just rewrote the same thing of like the version of me that lives in someone else's memory might be completely inaccurate. There's nothing I can do about it. That really trips me out, though, to be totally honest, because I go about my day thinking that I, I mean, it took me a long time, probably in my, you know, mid to late twenties to kind of figure out like, this is who I am. Like, I still change things that I do and things that I believe in and things like that. But like, I know who I am deep down to my core. And so it's, it's very strange for me to think about like people I knew in high school and how different I was then.

19:37And like, that is the permanent perception of me in their mind. That's permanent. They will always perceive me as that person because they don't know me anymore. You know what I'm saying? They don't, they haven't that perception hasn't changed because we don't interact anymore. And so that's just forever in their mind. It's crazy. It's really, really weird to think about. So also think about the people you knew in high school and think about how much they've changed and just give yourself, just allow yourself to believe that you don't know that person anymore and that they are probably a completely different person.

20:09They're a different person than you knew them as. And just give people grace for who they were in high school or elementary school or whatever it is, you know? okay next one okay this one is actually really trippy and it really rattles me to my core I'm not gonna lie um people say and I've heard this and I'm sure you guys have heard this that every time you think about a memory it changes and that you're not like when you're remembering something you're not remembering the actual event you're remembering the last time you remembered it does Does that make sense? And like every time you do something about the memory could potentially change.

20:47And so the next time you remember it, you're remembering it wrong because you remembered it wrong last time. You know what I'm saying? And it freaks me out. It freaks me out so bad because there's there's times in my life like my baby's being born or like my wedding or I don't know, like Robbie Nye's first date. And I'm like, should I not think about those moments? Because every time I think about them, are they going to change? you know what I'm saying like am I gonna forget my baby's first moments you know what I'm saying am I gonna forget the way they sounded am I gonna forget the way they cried like is it gonna change am I gonna warp it by thinking about it more you know what I'm saying and that that truly does freak me out so the more I'm worried that the more I think about them the less real they will become and they'll become fake you know and sometimes I'll have these moments where especially when I'm talking to my siblings, we talk a lot about the past and memories.

21:39And sometimes I'm sitting there and I'm like, you know what? I actually don't know if I was there. Like, I feel like I have this memory in my mind of me being there and of this thing happening, but I could have totally made it up. I could have heard this story so many times that I am now thinking that it's my own memory. This is kind of different from what I was talking about, but it's weird that our minds can even do that. It's weird that our minds can remember things and think that they're true when They're not even real. They didn't even happen. And so sometimes I'm worried about thinking about memories too much because I'm like, it's going to change into something that didn't even happen.

22:12My memory is going to like morph into something that wasn't even real. And that freaks me out. So also it's tricky to think about when you think about memories and you see it from third person, like you see yourself in the memory. I'm like, are those the memories that are fake? Because I'm not seeing it from like my own eyes. You know what I'm saying? It's like a bird's eye view more. Oh my God, are those some memories that are fake? Because I'm seeing that's not even how it happened. I saw things through my own eyes. So you think I would remember things coming out of my own eyeballs. Does that make sense?

22:44So I did some research. I did some internet research again. And this is what it says. This is what it says. It says a memory is not simply an image produced by time traveling back to the original event. It can be an image that is somewhat distorted because of the prior times you remembered it. Bridge. that's this research or whatever said in a press release your memory of an your memory of an event can grow less precise even to the point of being totally false with each retrieval like are you serious that is scary to think about and this this article that i read i didn't read the whole thing obviously i just skipped and found the parts that i wanted but it said that like eyewitness testimony sometimes are like they're they're important and they're valuable but they can be a little bit, you can't really use them as like hard evidence because every time this person's recollecting this event, it could potentially change and they could be like, well, I remembered it this way.

23:41And so like the very first retelling of an eyewitness account is the most important one because that's the one that's the most real, if that makes sense. So that also scares me because I'm like, the very first time I thought about my baby being born and crying, that was the most real and it's never going to be that real again. It's going to be different every single time I think about it. Okay. And the other thing I researched was the reason for distortion is the fact that human memories are always adapting. Memories aren't static. If you remember something in the context of a new environment in time, or if you're in a different mood, your memory might integrate the new information.

24:16That's scary. Based on my mood depends on how I remember something. That should be illegal. That should not even be a real thing. All right, let's move on because I'm worried that I'm thinking about my memories too much and they're changing. So let's move on. Okay, number six. I don't know if I told you guys the last one was number five. This one is number six. Money has value only because we agreed that it did. Like everybody in the world, not saying like American currency specifically, but all currency in the whole wide world. Everyone was like, okay, let's say that this piece of paper with like a couple little special things, if you hold it up to the light, has the value of$100 or the value of$1.

24:58And the$1 equals this many cents, or you can buy this much things with$1. You can buy this many things with $100. And everyone's like, okay, cool. That makes sense. And it's weird that it just was thought of. This had me thinking about a lot of different inventions and how they shaped the world. And I read a book once that was, I think it was called How We Got to Now. And it talked about, I think use five maybe six inventions that changed the world literally and they're the most simple things they're things that you wouldn't even wouldn't even think about it's things like the rail um like the railroad tracks but i don't know the rail company whatever shipping things that changed the world like people had access to things that they'd never had access to before and um like refrigeration that changed the world because people could eat different food they'd never had access to like think about it if people were in like a really warm country they couldn't have meat unless it was literally just barely slaughtered like i know that's a that's a very violent image but they couldn't have it unless it was literally fresh because there was no way to keep it um keep it not deadly what is the word i'm looking for keep it good um yeah so back to the money thing uh yeah I feel like that did change the world for sure and I was thinking about I tried to do some research research on when money was invented and it didn't really give me a solid answer because it kind of just like slowly became a thing I guess because people used to trade things you know like when people say oh this woman's worth three cows they used to trade things you should not trade humans that's not what i'm talking about but when people used to trade like wheat for barley or whatever it is i don't know i didn't live in that time but yeah people used to trade things and then somebody decided that that was too freaking hard and they wanted to just make like a system for it and earn money when you do jobs and things like that when you sell things.

27:10And that's just how we got to now. And it's crazy the way that money works now. It's so intricate and detailed and complex in the sense of like investing and 401ks and all these things. It's complicated. And the fact that there's like a bunch of money and nevermind, I'm not going to get into it. I don't get into like politics, but whatever. okay let's move on to number seven it says there's this one I used to talk about in high school all the time there's no way to know if everyone sees the sees colors the same like if I've been told that something was red my whole life in my mind I'm like this is red and when I see other shades of it I'm like I still know that that's red but someone else might be seeing it as blue like what I think is blue and they may think it's red but we've always been told that it's blue or red You know what I'm saying?

28:07Like they've always been told that it's red. I've always been told that it's red, but they may see it as what I see as blue. Does that make sense? I know that makes no sense, but hopefully you guys understand a little bit what I'm putting down, you know? And it was a huge theory of mine when I was a teenager. I'm sure, I'm sure there's science. I'm sure there's some sort of science that tells us, no, this is, we can literally tell exactly what they're seeing. but also I'm like do you really know like how can it be proven I don't know I just it's it's always been a theory of mine and I remember I used to tell literally anyone that would listen to me I would be like listen I got something to tell you and I want you to think about it and they would kind of be like no that's stupid and I'm like okay well you're not my person then you're not my kind of people that's how that's how I'd vet people and know that they were going to be a good friend for me and yeah I'm just kidding but kind of not um this one does freak me out because then I think like other things that there's so many things that people tell us that we just are like yeah that's a fact you know I used to think sometimes I'm like what if my mom told me that I was born on this day in this year but like I was actually born in on this day in this year and I would have no idea because I have a birth certificate that proves that I was born on the day she said I was born, but like, what if I really wasn't and I'm actually different?

29:29You know, I know that didn't happen. But if you think about it, it could. Someone, kids are so trusting and we grow up with these like foundational things in our mind. Like we know colors and we know numbers and all these things. And like, we just believe them because we were told to believe them. And I don't know, what if these things aren't even real? Okay. Next one says, it's number eight, does everyone hear a voice in their head? I'm not crazy. I'm not crazy. Don't, don't, just stick with me here. Like a literal narration, because I do. I literally hear voices in my head. No, but this is, this is what I mean.

30:13Like I'll be walking through the kitchen and I'm like, I literally have the thought, what should I eat for lunch today? Those words run through my mind. I hear them in my head. And then I think, let's look in the fridge. And I literally here let's look in the fridge and I have like a full-blown conversation in my head I hear the words in my head and I see pictures too like I picture the fridge and I picture myself walking through the kitchen and whatever but I also have like a literal narration of what's what's happening like an internal monologue of of things and I was I've I talked to Robbie about this one time and he's like no that doesn't happen to me like I don't hear voices in my head all the time and I'm like, what a relief would that be?

30:52What a relief would it be to not hear my own voice all the time? You know, like he's like, I just think in pictures. And I'm like, like a baby? Because I'm pretty sure that's how babies think, which is fine. I would rather think in pictures than have to listen to my own annoying voice all the time in my own head. My gosh, sorry. I just bumped the mic like 17 times. But yeah, I and maybe I could say that I would rather think that way, because you always want what you can't have, you know, but I just think it'd be cool. Also, I've heard this thing on TikTok, like when you close your eyes and you picture an apple people are like I see an actual apple like okay this one I just I can't understand it I truly can't like I can't close my eyes I see an apple in my head but like I don't see it does that make sense and people are like there's there's people that do they close their eyes and they literally see an apple like like it's right there they see an apple in their mind where I think of like an apple I can picture it in my mind, but it's like not there.

31:49Do you know what I'm saying? And then there's some people who literally just see black and I'm like, well, when I close my eyes, I do see black. So am I the person that sees black or am I the person who sees the apple? Cause I can picture the apple. You know what I'm saying? These are the things that make my shower 15 years long because I'm sitting here closing my eyes, trying to see a freaking apple when I should be washing my hair. You know, I did some Google research on this one as well. And I didn't, I didn't dive very deep. I just literally googled it and then read what the google ai said and sometimes the google ai cannot be trusted so take this for what it is as in it's it's ai so yeah uh it says uh no not everyone thinks in words while some individuals primarily experience thoughts as an internal monologue others think in images feelings sensations or other non-verbal forms research suggests that the way people experience inner thoughts vary significantly this is crazy because and maybe This is very egocentric of me, but I mean, not so much anymore.

32:46As I grow up, I realize that people are different, but I always thought that like everyone at the very least thought the same, you know, like our process of thinking was similar. And now that I am an adult and I've had a few years under my belt as an adult, I'm like, you're telling me that that's not true. You're telling me that even the most basic thing that I thought we could all for sure have in common might not even be true. Like we could all be thinking completely differently. But that also explains as to why so many people can't understand other people. You know, like everyone has people in their life where you're like this person and this person, they just don't jive.

33:25I don't understand why they don't get each other. And I'm like, you know what? It could be that they literally just don't think the same. They will never understand the other person because they'll never know what it's like to think in pictures. And they'll never know what it's like to have literal narration in their head. I know it's not as simple as that, but you know what I'm saying, I could see why people are different because even the way we think is different. It's crazy. Okay. Um, next one says, this one's kind of a bummer. So sorry, but it's, I'm just going to talk about it because, because I am.

33:55Okay. Number nine. I can't remember the last time I hung out with all of my siblings by ourselves, which is a really, really sad thought. I was thinking about this a couple weeks ago and like it's weird that at one point sorry I just sniffed it's weird that one point we all just like went our own direction and we never really had like this last time we're not like okay this is our last sibling sleepover because we probably always assumed that we'd have another one you know what I mean but then at some point we just didn't and this is kind of along the same lines of people say there's a there's a last time your mom picked you up and put you down and never picked you up again and that's kind of sad to think about or like the last time your mom uh kissed you on the forehead or you know what I mean like there's the last time and you just never think about it I was thinking about this with like siblings there's a last time that we were all together under the same roof just you know like kicking a ball around in the front yard and there were all of us there and it was just us we didn't have relationships we didn't have I mean we had friends but like we were each other's you know we were family we still are family obviously but you know what I mean like we all lived in the same place and there was the last time of that I mean it just never really got talked about like there's so many things there's so many celebratory events that we have like a last for like graduation we're like this is my last day of school and we go out and we have like a dinner and we invite people and or like um like a bachelorette party or going away parties things like that.