Modupe's Top 5 (#2): How to break through fear and become a leader | Valerie Montgomery Rice

0:00Hi, I'm Molly Graham, host of Work Life, a podcast from TED. The most important lessons about work usually aren't the ones anyone teaches you. They come from experience, from uncertainty, from figuring things out as you go. On this show, my expert guests and I explore how careers really unfold through change, through doubt, through the decisions that shape who we become over time. Because those moments aren't the exception. They are the work. Listen to Work Life wherever you get your podcasts.

0:58of some of my favorite talks we've ever aired on this show. So settle in as we take a trip down memory lane. All of these talks are so different from one another. That's what I've loved about hosting this show. Every week brings a different topic, a different approach, a different way of seeing and thinking. But I think if there's one overarching quality these five talks share, it's that they remind us that our relationships to work, to personal finance, to our colleagues, are all distinctly human. In an increasingly automated world, that idea can truly change everything. Whether the speaker is harnessing humor or vulnerability or their own memories of growing up, these talks are anchored by compelling storytelling.

1:45They remind us that the professional doesn't mean sacrificing the personal and that all organizations are made up of people trying to figure something out together. You'll hear business leader Adam Wybrew make a case for talking about your anxiety in the workplace. President and CEO of Morehouse School of Medicine, Valerie Montgomery Rice, share how she stepped up to become a leader in her field. Director Barry Sonnenfeld on the lessons he's learned on set that can translate to the office. Goodwill strategist James Rhee on the power of kindness. and nonprofit leader Aisha Yandoro on rethinking what wealth means.

2:31Part of why I enjoy hosting this podcast is that I love getting to hear people's stories. You never know how someone got from point A to point B, and there might be a lot to learn from those journeys. Today's talk is a perfect example of this. It begins with a little pink house in Wrens, Georgia, but it ends with all of us paying it forward.

3:00I'm Madhup Akinola. This is TED Business from the TED Audio Collective. The woman guiding us along this journey is Valerie Montgomery Rice, the president and CEO of the Morehouse School of Medicine. So many lessons in leadership for her began in that little pink house she grew up in, where courage and resilience were modeled for her by her mother and grandmother. Then after the talk, I'll ask you about your own story and how it helps you understand the person you are today. But first, a quick break.

3:39A random influencer, a friend who read something somewhere, your doctor. It can be hard to know where to get trusted health information. TED Health is a podcast that will help you focus on the stuff that you actually need to know to live your healthiest life. I'm Dr. Shoshana Ungerleiter, a practicing internist, and I share weekly TED Talks from certified health experts that break down the questions you're always getting different answers to. Get the science-backed ideas for a healthier you with TED Health, wherever you get your podcasts.

4:17And now, Valerie Montgomery Rice takes the TED stage. Let me tell you how a little pink house prepared me for my first workplace termination and set me on a path of resilience, grit and fearlessness. About two and a half hours south of Atlanta is a little town of Renz, Georgia, about 2000 people. My grandmother lived in Renz, Georgia, in a pink house nested off a dirt road right off of East 88 Highway. It had a massive yard, the kind of yard that was made for little five-year-old girls who liked to make mud pies or run chicken races with their cousins to see who could run the fastest, the chickens of the cousins.

5:18that was summer at grandmother's house and if I think about it I can remember and feel that Georgia sign on my face I can remember when I was just tall enough to jump off the bed to use the pot next door to the bed because the pink house didn't get indoor plumbing until 1968. Those are the memories that serve as my foundation. That's what helped me to become the woman that I am today. In the midst of those challenges, I can hear my grandmother's voice laced with a little bit of sternness when she said, Valerie, it's your time to go get the eggs out the chicken coop, or sometimes even select the chicken for that day for dinner.

6:12I learned then that I would, I should, and I could. Now, all of our memories are clearly not laced with warmth, because I can also remember when my family struggled, when my mother struggled. And I think about that pink house. That pink house was not only my classroom, but it was my mother's refuge. My mother was my sort of first view into leadership. And when I think about her and all the other women who went through challenges and how they use those challenges sort of to catapult them into becoming the women that they were to be. Lesson number one. Several years ago, I had to learn what it meant to accept loss, but not defeat.

7:16I was riding high on my career. I was a reproductive endocrinologist and fertility specialist who was clearly, smoothly transitioning to an academic administrative research career. I became the chair of the department. I founded the Center for Women's Health Research at Meharren Medical College, which was the first center of its kind. And then I became the dean of the School of Medicine. And at that time, I was the youngest dean of a medical school in the country.

7:55Then it all came tumbling down. When the new president of the school asked me to step down. He asked me to step down. I was devastated. I was embarrassed. I was ashamed. I was fearful. Fear was what I felt most of all. Would I ever be able to get another job like this? What about this sense of loss, humiliation? What would my family and my friends think about me? Would they have a negative view of me as I went through? I had to reach back to that pink house. And I had to recall how my mother had gone through a similar crossroads in her life when she had to gather her four little daughters in the middle of the night to leave an abusive husband.

9:01Lost but not defeated. What did she do? First of all, she was accountable. She actually said, what of my actions potentially could have contributed to the situation that I find myself in?

9:21Then she took action because she was responsible. And she knew that she had to leave in order to protect her girls. I had to do the same thing. To paraphrase one of my favorite authors, Paulo Coelho, he says that before a dream is realized, the soul of the world tests everything that you have learned. And it does this such that when you are in pursuit of your dreams, you are also mastering the lessons learned in pursuit of that dream. I was being tested in the pursuit of my dreams. And the lessons that I had learned from my mother had prepared me for my circumstances. And I could move on and move forward in my career, lost but not defeated.

10:20Now, this leads me to leadership lesson number two, never fear, be fearless. Now, all of us know that fear is an unpleasant emotion, right? It is often, though, a healthy one because it will cause you to take action just like my mother did when she had to leave that abusive relationship. Because it is an emotion and it is a biological response, sometimes we think that the act of being fearless means that we are not afraid. You can still be afraid. And so you may not be able to cancel that fear out completely, but you can put it to sleep. You can learn how to lean into your fear. And I think the best way to do that is to do something over and over and over again successfully.

11:15I believe it's a superpower. It's the superpower my mother had. She could multitask. She could go to work. She could cook and clean. She could go to work. She could run errands. She could come back to work. And then she still had empathy. She failed. She succeeded. Not always, guys, to joy, but to completion. And I recognized that I had to do the same thing. So when I put myself back out there, I had to interview. I had to be evaluated over and over again. I was tested over and over again. I heard no. I gave the word no until I got to yes, until I got to the role that allowed me to align my passion with my purpose.

12:07Turning your fear into being fearless allows you to accept the challenges that you have laced with risk, leading you to a place that will be right for you. Now, this brings me to my third lesson, giving back and paying it forward. As the president and CEO of Morehouse School of Medicine, I get to sit at so many different tables, tables where I'm actually able to use my voice and talk about the things that are near and dear to me, like diversifying the healthcare workforce. or working toward the elimination of health disparities, or ensuring that we have culturally competent providers that are going to provide that highest quality of care.

12:55And yes, I've learned from my mother how to give back in the traditional ways, community service, charity. But I also believe it's important for women to tell their story. I've told my story about watching my mother navigate through an abusive relationship. I was a child that had an imprint on me. I've told my story about the professional journeys and the challenges I've had to get to the point where I am today. We must do that for each other because women must be heard, but they also must listen. This is what gives us hope that we are not alone and that there is a light at the end of those dark tunnels.

13:46And of course, as a medical professional specializing in women's health, I give back by staying on the forefront of reproductive rights. Rights.

14:01Who has the right to tell me what's right for my body? For my body. For myself. For my mental well-being. For my family. Women's reproductive rights and women's health rights should have equal parity to any other choice I make about my health. And I really don't need anyone to tell me what's right for me. I need you to help me make the right choices with me, but not for me.

14:39And I should have the ultimate say. Now, I am fortunate that my job is to pay it forward. This means that I also must stand and raise my voice when decisions like the recent Supreme Court decision on affirmative action came out. It will impact the ability of people to have choice and to further their education. Many of the women in this room, we know that we have benefited from affirmative action. I clearly did, whether it was in college or the workplace. And if we are honest, many of us would not be where we are today if it wasn't for affirmative action. So we should really be first in line talking about affirmative action, particularly in higher ed and in the medical profession, because we know that race and gender concordance impacts health outcomes.

15:41So how is it that we can have a military exemption for the good of the country, but not a medical exemption for the good of the country?

15:56Particularly if we are interested in eliminating disparities and achieving health equity for all. So I challenge you as leaders. I challenge you as women to raise your voices. We need more diversity in the future, not less. I go back to that pink house because that pink house is where I learned to be vigilant. It's where I learned and understood that I had choice. It's where I learned and understood that I could be committed to my dreams, my aspirations. It's where I learned how to be fearless. is where I learned to take that fear and turn it into a weapon of success that has allowed me to lead.

16:44That little pink house is where I gained courage. And I was surrounded by my sisters, my mother, my grandmother, my great-grandmother, all pushing me forward. Great leaders are not produced through the number of titles or degrees that they have, but through life experiences, through the distance traveled, the tables they sit, the conversations they have, and what ensues in those conversations. I learned from my time in that pink house that for some of us it starts early on. For others, though, the title may just be woman. Remember fearlessness, grit, and resilience, and that you are enough. Thank you very much.

17:49Hi, I'm Molly Graham, host of Work Life, a podcast from TED. The most important lessons about work usually aren't the ones anyone teaches you. They come from experience, from uncertainty, from figuring things out as you go. On this show, my expert guests and I explore how careers really unfold. Through change, through doubt, through the decisions that shape who we become over time. Because those moments aren't the exception. They are the work. Listen to Work Life wherever you get your podcasts.

18:27That was Valerie Montgomery Rice speaking at TED Women 2023. I love Valerie's distinction between being afraid and being fearless. The two aren't mutually exclusive. It reminds me of what I always say about stress. The way to deal with anxiety is not to pretend it doesn't exist. It's to acknowledge it, make peace with it, and let it move you to action. Valerie's story is powerful, and it reminds me of the value in looking back. So often on this podcast, we talk about the future, what we're planning to do, our actionable ideas. But Valerie reminds us that so many of the answers lie in the past.

19:09I want to ask you, what's the equivalent of your little pink house? Where did you learn some really powerful lessons that have stayed with you and guided you through life? What are those key lessons? And in what ways are you paying those lessons forward and keeping that dream alive? Telling a compelling story isn't just a way to get other people to understand us better. It's also a tool for us to understand ourselves and to help us feel ready to move through the world. That's it for today. TED Business is part of the TED Audio Collective. This episode was produced by Hannah Kingley Ma, edited by Alejandra Salazar, and fact-checked by Julia Dickerson.

19:56Special thanks to Maria Logis, Farrah DeGrange, Daniela Belarezo, and Roxanne Hylash. I'm Madhupa Akinola. Thanks for listening.