Girl Talk: Am I crazy for telling my bff she’s about to get engaged?

0:01Sophia Treadway: You need something from Lowe's, but your day is already jam-packed. Since MyLowe's Rewards and MyLowe's Pro Rewards members get free same-day delivery, we'll make the run for you. Seriously, just lock in your order and we'll do the rest. See you soon. Members get more at Lowe's. $25 minimum and loyalty membership required. Order eligible items by 2 p.m. Subject to weight and size restrictions and availability. Terms at lowes.com slash shipping terms. Hello, this is Chris Winterbauer from What Went Wrong. TCM and Criterion joined forces for the plot thickens Stanley. This season's podcast traces Stanley Kubrick's journey from a curious Bronx teenager, first inspired by a camera gifted to him by his father, to a revolutionary filmmaker who rewrote the rules.

0:48Sophia Treadway: Featuring a never-before-heard audio interview with Kubrick himself, go behind the camera with some of Kubrick's closest friends and collaborators to examine his legacy, including Katerina Kubrick, Steven Spielberg, Sofia Coppola, Matthew Modine, and many more. Available starting now wherever you get your podcasts.

1:06Nicole Riche: Do I tell my best friend she's getting engaged? I would advise not.

1:13Sophia Treadway: Sarah, what the hell are you thinking? You know the drama is never ending. Don't let it get the best of you.

1:22Nicole Riche: Hey. Happy Wednesday. Hey, we're back in the bathroom. Ginzi is serving sporty mum chic. We're both serving baggy, sporty vibes today. Yeah, ish, yeah. Because you're serving rugby. Yeah, I'm serving large collar.

1:37Sophia Treadway: Yeah, I'm serving collar. Yeah, actually, that's weird, isn't it? Look, I never serve collar. Yeah, it's giving quite smart, actually. And we're both actually serving bow and tea. Is that a shell suit, would you call that?

1:47Nicole Riche: Oh, bow and tea shell now. Yeah, this is a shell. It's quite hot.

1:50Sophia Treadway: Yeah. Fiona always told me that back in the day, they all wore shell suits. neon shell suits that's what they wore on Skipping Wham

1:58Nicole Riche: yeah and in what was Channing Tatum in?

2:01Sophia Treadway: Step Up

2:02Nicole Riche: yeah it was classic I don't think they were

2:04Sophia Treadway: serving shell suits

2:05Nicole Riche: he was serving vests

2:07Sophia Treadway: and like Juggers Step Up was one of my favourite films of all time I enjoy Step Up 1, 2 and 3 and 4 have I seen all of them? I'm not sure I have I've seen them all multiple times

2:18Nicole Riche: because I get them confused with the film Honey I mean Cassie's in Step Up 1 did you deep that? right it's not deep that see she's the triple threat who's in honey jessica alba you see i get them confused yeah that's a bit silly isn't it because they're all dance shows and what else is jessica alba recently in your favorite new song yeah hands up gabrie do you actually want me to teach you how to do the dance i did watch it on the vlog no but i can actually teach you but i go on you try then I don't remember it. Right. So it's hands off. Hands off. Yeah. And then it's, do you need to get this?

2:54Nicole Riche: You see, you're doing it wrong already. Oh no. So the spin. It actually took me two weeks. Chintzy is teaching me a K-pop dance. It actually took me two weeks. I recommend tuning into the visuals. The cool girls and the guys. They get it. You know Cat Size Gabriela song. Right. You ready? Yep. So this is the spin. Right. It looks very complex. It is. It's mesmerizing. Yeah. and they do it so quick. I'm really talented. Right. So like that. Can I have some verbal instruction? I mean, it took me two weeks. Like you're going to go like that and then you're like that. So that goes down. So that and then down.

3:32Nicole Riche: Yeah. And then you go into the back. Yeah. And round. Yeah. Almost. So again, hands are down, round. Yeah. And back round and grab it. Yes, that was actually it. So you're going down. No, you see, you went like that.

3:51Sophia Treadway: Like that. See, this is why we're not cut out for the K-pop camps. Yeah, like that.

3:57Nicole Riche: I like that. It's really hard. Honestly, it's making me get really hot. Yeah. Gone were the days

4:03Sophia Treadway: when we could pick up choreography like that. I don't know what.

4:06Nicole Riche: But hands off, Gabriella. Wow. My eyes are like a hypnotist. I know. It's like I'm getting hypnotized. No, but they do it so well. They just performed at Lollapalooza. Lollapalooza. Oh, well, shout out Jessica Alba, really. I'm going to take this shell suit off, I swear.

4:22Sophia Treadway: Is it getting hot in there? You've got a top on underneath.

4:25Nicole Riche: I've got a vest on, but it's too much. Oh, dear. Right. Well, we're diving in. Yeah, happy Wednesday. I mean, happy August. Absolutely. Quite a nice name, that. Can you tell my lip flips kicked in? No. Or is it just all in my head? No, it's looking good. Because it feels like it's like, do you know what I mean? No, I wouldn't notice.

4:46Sophia Treadway: But I remember because you said that you didn't know why you didn't like it last time. And I remember because you couldn't drink through a straw. Oh, I noticed. I saw that. Yeah. Did you see it? I like it.

4:58Nicole Riche: And it's like the lips is like, you can't. You can't. You can't. You can't do that. Yeah. No.

5:05Sophia Treadway: Yeah.

5:05Nicole Riche: So it's just kicking in now and it's like the new norm. Yeah.

5:08Sophia Treadway: How's the bruise?

5:09Nicole Riche: Bruce is going down finally I got some arnica cream ah nice yeah yeah love it

5:14Sophia Treadway: using some arnica but yeah wow thank you everyone god happy Wednesday new week new lips absolutely new shell suits absolutely what a time to be alive

5:22Nicole Riche: new balance

5:24Sophia Treadway: wow fucking hell yeah it's all kicking off what is spice babe um should we do our question of the week question of the week this week is

5:35Nicole Riche: we like this one it's topical it's giving serving summer it's serving everything it feels because someone close to home had some drama on a

5:46Sophia Treadway: girl's holiday well actually it was a couple's holiday and that was the issue that's what we've learned the couples were the issue yeah so our question of the week this week

5:57Nicole Riche: because all couples dynamics are different and when you do bring like six couples together is actually really interesting yeah to see how just especially if we're not used to hanging out as a six yeah and then it's like people are meeting for the first time every couple has their own dynamic and then it is interesting actually but also can you imagine just the joy

6:19Sophia Treadway: of you know hanging out with new couples for the first time and then going back to your room with your couple and being like oh my fucking god and did you see that oh my god what do you think of that like yeah unless you've just got a boyfriend who gets on with everyone it's like for fuck's like give me some gossip please right okay girls holiday confessions that was our question of the week yes oh I mean a girl here's put where do I even begin stop actually tell us because like I want to know my friend cheated on her boyfriend went home like nothing happened I don't know if

6:54Nicole Riche: I could witness that like how would you actually oh my god my friend had sex on holiday with the son the dad and the granddad that can't be real that can't be real that's insane i'm gonna click

7:10Sophia Treadway: on this girl's profile see if she's uh got a public page and we can see if she's been on a girl's holiday about like the granddad how does that come about i mean it could be 20 40 60 they might it might not be an 80 year old you know there's some granddad's knocking about that's 50 oh but why are they this is the thing though this is what i don't think we've realized

7:31Nicole Riche: and where did i see this why did the sons why did they think that's sexy like who like why did the dads what why did the dads want to sleep with the same girl that the son surely it was like a weird sexual thing for them like the granddad's like that's willies i don't think they're actually

7:51Sophia Treadway: old shrivel and wrinkly which is interesting yeah yeah i saw that no but what do you mean you've seen one no i've not seen one but i saw that somewhere i feel like it was someone talking about marrying an old guy and it was like it's not an old wrinkly willy like you would imagine

8:09Nicole Riche: as we age skin elasticity weakens it's so true yeah surely but when it no listen all right everyone picture some old does that mean our vaginas are gonna get wrinkly because i don't well it might do yeah the skin elasticity is gonna cause some like creases okay because i'm thinking like um old men's ears that kind of skin oh you know but naturally

8:39Sophia Treadway: surely they're gonna ask this girl who's like she could have compared all three yeah that would have been interesting me and my bestie both slept with three different pairs of best friends in one night wow that's insane that's productive my bestie kissed scotty t on our first girls holiday

8:56Nicole Riche: scotty t he's still about yeah

9:02Sophia Treadway: we pretended our dad was a part of the mafia in marbella the whole holiday was free my dad's in the mafia let me in my granddad was in the mafia um broke into a hotel had sex with

9:15Nicole Riche: the dj in a swimming pool that sounds like a uti tiktok of that couple having sex in the public pool no oh my god it's this couple and this girl's like getting out of the pool like she's jumping in. What, poor daylight? Yeah, and they're like, oh, no, I can't. It's disgusting. The chlorine. That's not okay.

9:35Sophia Treadway: Right, what else have we got here? Girls holiday confessions.

9:39Nicole Riche: I may as well be in a sauna suit. Like, I'm fucking boiling.

9:42Sophia Treadway: What are those things that people just sweat in that they wear into a sauna? Yeah, that's what I'm in right now. I'm like in a

9:46Nicole Riche: foil jacket.

9:47Sophia Treadway: Oh, it's okay. Take some deep breaths. Drink your water. Stay hydrated. Yeah, I've got eyes. Went to a male strip club and my husband still thinks he went to a baseball game that night. that is naughty sarah i'm not sure if we can condone that behavior a lot of people having sex on the beach a lot of people getting sand in their vaginas love that we have naked nights where we all sit with our tits out on the balcony oh that sounds like us kind of holiday i think i love that i love just sat there towels hanging tits out nudity is so healthy bit of aloe vera

10:24Nicole Riche: few crisps i would like to go to lemon i would enjoy a women's only nudist beach yeah i was gonna say the same i would love that yeah me too would that be yeah i know like imagine also like

10:38Sophia Treadway: burning your nipples that'd be quite painful yeah but even just in the sea the feeling of just the floating around about yeah sounds really nice it would be nice um

10:50Nicole Riche: um fingered in the taxi home oh god and i saw that video of that couple at um a baseball game and she was getting fingered like in this algorithm on tiktok like literally watching baseball or whatever in america and like literally fingering or she was either fingering herself or he was fingering her yes yes i seen it we need to change your algorithm i like it

11:27Sophia Treadway: um i went on holiday with my ex post breakup it was the most fun we've ever had

11:32Nicole Riche: good for you guys oh fuck it like it was but let's just have some fun let's just go

11:39Sophia Treadway: we're not together anyway yeah suck someone off and disabled with bathroom wow spacious yeah i hear that yeah there's usually something to hold on to

11:52Nicole Riche: person in a wheelchair waiting waiting that is not good sarah went skinny dipping with my friend and she's shat in the sea sarah man control your bowels

12:08Nicole Riche: i can barely wee in the sea slept with a boy woke up covered in his pierce wait what say

12:13Sophia Treadway: that again she slept with a boy and woke up covered in his pierce oh sarah you're right i can't just do i can't do we slept with a 50 year old fat man in ocean beach toilets

12:23Nicole Riche: in where ocean beach toilets wayne oh my god wait

12:33Nicole Riche: oh right when will wayne retire i don't know i don't know surely he's not going as hard as he used to i know but his voice is telling me he's still drinking his voice has always been like

12:45Sophia Treadway: that wayne he's got depth it's mature oh

12:56Nicole Riche: just before we get into it quick disclaimer just as we are not doctors we are not professionals we do not actually know what we are talking about this is a light-hearted space okay don't take what

13:05Sophia Treadway: we say literally because we could be wrong yeah and if there's anything serious if there's anything you feel like you're seriously struggling with please contact a gp a professional because that is not us we're just girls girls and boys just like you we're just trying to get through life as well not professionals enjoy the episode let's get into some dilemmas it's not that nice what your matcha yeah it tastes like caramel caramel yeah it's like they put like real sugar in it caramel does it smell and does it smell well

13:41Nicole Riche: no i need to tell you something santos is having a baby with brie with who brie who's that you'll recognize her if you know you know guys oh my god santos is gonna be a dad with brie santos you know it smell well

14:07Sophia Treadway: as if santos is gonna be a dad he's had a busy year he has he's had a great year yeah

14:14Nicole Riche: we saw him at katralla we did santos Santa. Grace, do you know who Santa says?

14:22Sophia Treadway: Does it smell well? She's talking about her vagina.

14:27Nicole Riche: Santa.

14:28Sophia Treadway: And everyone's like, your pussy stings. And she's like, Santa, does it smell well? Does it smell well?

14:32Nicole Riche: He's having a baby, yeah, with Bri. Anyway, we'll dive in. I don't know who Bri is. Bri and her had a fight or something. She hates Bri.

14:44Sophia Treadway: I'll have to show you. Is Brie of a, like, a good age for Santos? Yeah, yeah, Santos. Okay.

14:54Sophia Treadway: Santos. I can't help but vocal fry. Okay, where should we start this week? I mean, speaking of girls trips, we've got a girl here who's been uninvited. Let's do that, that's perfect. From the girls trip.

15:07Nicole Riche: Leads right on, right? Sit this way now.

15:09Sophia Treadway: Hey, girls. Long time listener here. Thank you, Sarah. love you girls so much everything you do so joe and my friends met you guys in london oh thank you this will be a long one perfect we love it so brace yourselves i was uninvited from the girls trip fuck them and they've now gone without me oh sarah that is actually you know

15:32Nicole Riche: it's their loss i know you would have brought the vibes you know to be the one who's left out horrible is awful because like why and then now we've got all these private jokes yeah

15:40Sophia Treadway: remember that no I don't fucking remember obviously it was purposeful obviously like

15:45Nicole Riche: but why it's just mean anyway let's see maybe they've got some reasonings maybe you're the problem maybe you are Sarah we're you know we're the realists here to let you know but

15:58Sophia Treadway: I don't think you are a bit of a backstory I'm Sarah and my best friend and I met three years ago she is called susan susan has a friend called helen who i am now also good friends with but you know not that close as we did meet through susan okay so susan is the glue i think helen's the problem then it sounds susan and i live in leeds whereas helen lives in somerset where susan is

16:23Nicole Riche: actually from down in the wirrell that wasn't wrong sorry that was completely wrong somerset

16:30Sophia Treadway: and the Wirral is not the same place.

16:32Nicole Riche: Australian came out. I meant farmer. Farmer. Yeah, that's what I meant. Somerset.

16:37Sophia Treadway: Where Susan is actually from. Okay, but Susan and I moved from our hometown for uni. Okay, so you and Susan live in the same city. Helen is in Somerset. Susan and I recently went on holiday a couple of months ago to America. Wow. Oh, USA. We had such an amazing time.

16:55Nicole Riche: My pronouns are USA. He's not seen that. Okay. I have not seen that. I'll have to show you later. While you're planning. Yeah, go on.

17:06Sophia Treadway: While we were planning, I like that. My pronouns. Have you not seen it? Let me just play the sound. Your nails are serving USA.

17:14Nicole Riche: Are you S-A.

17:19Sophia Treadway: Oh, I didn't know it went on like that.

17:20Nicole Riche: My pronouns are you S-A. It's like weird. It's weird. Yeah. My pronouns.

17:30Sophia Treadway: Okay. So pronouns USA, trip to America, lovely, lovely time.

17:35Nicole Riche: Yeah, I'm saving for the July.

17:36Sophia Treadway: You are, yeah. God. While we were planning, we decided to invite Helen too, as I really like her and it's one of Susan's best friends and she's a really fun person. Okay. Helen said yes and we planned. So Helen was invited on your already trip. America trip, yeah. But she told us last minute before we booked that she actually didn't want to go as she was just wanting to do a drinking holiday. And that wasn't really the vibe of the America trip. Okay. I was gutted as I really wanted her to come. But Susan and I went anyways and we had such a lovely time. Went to Florida, watched the Miami Dolphins and just an amazing trip.

18:13Sophia Treadway: It really brought us really close. While we were out there, Helen was constantly messaging Susan trying to plan a holiday with her as she was clearly jealous. Susan was really annoyed as she couldn't really relax with Helen constantly nagging her. Helen really wanted to go to Ibiza. Susan asked me if I wanted to come. Originally, I said no, as I have a fiancé and I'm not much of a party person. After Helen saw all of our pictures from our trip, she said she didn't want to do too much partying and it would be nice if we chilled and did fun things and saw the pretty side of Ibiza instead. After speaking with my fiance, he didn't really mind if we did a party holiday.

18:53Sophia Treadway: So I was feeling a lot better about going. I got really excited. We were all discussing hotels. I made loads of suggestions, you know, of things we could do. Boats, snorkeling, nice restaurants, good activities. Everyone seemed super happy. I then get a phone call from Helen saying she's stressed about what to buy for Ibiza because her and Susan were leaving in four days. For another trip. for the ibiza trip what does that mean wait what what they have booked the trip without me and decided to go without me wait why the hell would she call you so that she doesn't know what to

19:29Nicole Riche: that's really mean wait but you would have said that you were going yeah and you were sent all talking about hotels together in a chat i'm assuming no i asked her whoa like i thought i

19:41Sophia Treadway: was going like why i couldn't come and she said helen would rather it just be the two of them oh i'm sure helen would oh helen knows the owner yeah okay helen um as we'd just gone to florida okay so helen's thinking well you've had your alone time with sarah and i want some alone time with you helen proceeded to tell me she didn't think i'd want to go anyway as they was going to be drinking which is silly because that's so we didn't think you'd want to come code and just mean

20:12Nicole Riche: girl vibes and i'm sure you said that oh i chatted to my fiance's yeah we've had this whole i've been

20:16Sophia Treadway: snorkeling boats restaurants they've now gone and not only that they have done everything I suggested so you've been the concierge for this trip as well yeah and did everything I wanted to do just without me while they've been away I received an incredible job offer that I have always wanted and a huge opportunity oh that's amazing everything happens for a reason then I told Susan but she just didn't seem very happy for me right she just said oh well done girl and she was sitting on the beach and didn't even look at me on the FaceTime call. The job offer is something she could potentially be interested in but to me it just screamed jealousy and not very happy for me.

20:58Sophia Treadway: Oh so she wanted that also. I posted a picture on my Instagram to do with this job as it's huge and she didn't even double tap, didn't comment or anything. Helen also got a job offer however it's something that Susan is not interested in and Susan reposted her, told everyone about it, but I've not really had that same attention. Okay, so similar things have happened in your life and Helen's got a lot of love but you've not really got as much. My question is, are these people worth keeping as friends? I do love, you know, Susan specifically and we do have such an amazing time and I'd love to have the same friendship with her as she seems to have with other people.

21:37Sophia Treadway: However, I'm starting to feel a little bit left out. She invites me to plans constantly but only plans that she knows I'll say no to. yeah and that is a thing as well it's kind of I know you're busy but I'm going to invite you so at least it makes me look good I constantly feel hurt by her but I can't really speak to her about it because she has an extreme victim mindset that it's so hard to speak to people like her without her trying to then make me feel bad crying and saying that she never brings anything up so it's unfair that I am she constantly reminds me that she bites her tongue in every friendship because she knows the second she says something the friendship will be over whoa what does that mean

22:15Nicole Riche: that means that she she she if she'll say something nasty and lose the friendship right if she's biting her tongue yeah i'm constantly biting my tongue like yeah say something crazy

22:27Sophia Treadway: it's gonna go off part of me just thinks let them okay mel robbins yeah yeah and move on but part of me thinks I should say something but when I do she either sits so calmly and makes me feel stupid for bringing it up or just screams at me well yeah I fear this is not a healthy

22:45Nicole Riche: friendship dynamic it's not sounding good you shouldn't be scared that your friend's gonna shout and scream at you or like not hear you out and yeah like and also you literally said girls let's go to Ibiza maybe Helen's brought out the a bad side of her you know yeah possibly I don't I don't want to blame Helen, but maybe it's, I don't know, but you were literally planning the trip and then they just went and booked it. Like, that's not. With no communication. You could say something and go, oh, like I would. I think she did in the moment. I mean, I would just let them get on with it. I don't think you should be scared that your friend is going to scream and shout at you.

23:18Nicole Riche: I don't. That's like walking on trails around your friends.

23:21Sophia Treadway: I also don't think you want to feel like you're having to like force your way in. Yeah, or like prove yourself to them. Like, oh, don't forget about me. Like, oh yeah, I'm there, I'm available. like you shouldn't have to feel like oh I really need to like oh don't forget about me like oh I'm me I'm me I'm me like I don't I don't feel like you need to feel like that you shouldn't be forcing your way in and like being worried that you're going to get forgotten about or like that kind

23:43Nicole Riche: of it doesn't sound like the best dynamic maybe to Susan Helen is this new shiny friend and she's like oh she's a home friend she's an old friend oh was she Helen but she was more of a summer set but was she a new addition to our Sarah?

23:59Sophia Treadway: A little bit. Oh, I don't know.

24:01Nicole Riche: But I'm picturing like, she's like a newer, shinier friend. And it's like, oh yeah, Sarah, we can forget about Sarah for a minute. Like, do you know what I mean? Like she's always going to be around kind of thing. Like, and kind of just treat you however she wants to treat you and knows that you're always going to be around and not speak up for yourself kind of thing. But she's the new friend. Helen's the old friend. Oh, well then. I think you don't want friends who you're scared are going to shout at you. What the hell? bottom line bottom line is like and also like friends that are making you feel left out but also like how fun would that have been for us all to have gone to ibiza so if you guys don't want me to come i don't want to come with you if you're then sniggering and chatting about me behind my back it feels like what it is they obviously went oh let's just it feels like

24:45Sophia Treadway: like helen is secretly in competition with you like susan seems to be the middle person and it's almost like Helen's competing with you about who can be the best, who can be close and who can be the best friend to Susan.

24:57Nicole Riche: And then like the whole job thing and like the woo woo, Helen, Helen. And then you didn't get anything. I just think I would quietly remove myself. So would I. That's just how I would operate. I would step back. I would retreat. Yeah. And then they'll, it's like when you're dating someone and you go quiet and it's like, oh, where have they gone? Yeah. And it doesn't mean that like, I don't know.

25:19Sophia Treadway: I would just maybe take a step back and maybe just reevaluate and think, okay, who else do I have in my life? Let me pour into some other friendships. Let me, you know, I used to be really close to that person. Let me try and get that back. Or, oh, I haven't spoke to them in a few months. I'm going to reach out and message them. Maybe use this as a kind of like you're pushing yourself out of your comfort zone to kind of expand your social circle and hopefully make some, you know,

25:45Nicole Riche: healthier friendships yeah i think so and like and leave them to it i'm not trying to compete for your friendship babes you ain't that good no like also like you that was really weird and sneaky and like yeah weird and sneaky like i don't want weird sneaky friends yeah i want you to want to take me to i be come to ibiza with you it doesn't make any sense you don't want me what's that song um don't know that oh that's okay like i don't want you shouldn't have to force your friends to want to go on a fun holiday with you yeah like no no no hopefully they had a right we've got here do i tell my best friend she's getting engaged i would advise not who sarah but maybe the hell are you thinking but maybe there's other oh maybe she thinks she's

26:44Sophia Treadway: gonna say no i'm not sure maybe you don't like him hello girls i love you both and congratulations

26:50Nicole Riche: to sophia on the engage oh thank you sarah i have my own engagement dilemma my best friend's brian is wanting to propose on their four year anniversary oh and he's sarah what the hell are you thinking he's asked me to help with the ring and planning wow whilst this is lovely and i'm very grateful he's asked for my advice my bestie has never wanted to get married keep your mouth shut and has always said she would say no if she was to be asked shit does this man not know i don't care sarah have they not have they not chatted though but how does this man not know her though maybe she's told you one thing and him a different thing yeah a bit of a backstory she lost a parent and due to this a wedding would never be the same i have politely tried to mention this to her brian but he just says she will definitely say yes this is this is all we've got my dilemma is is do i tell him don't do it oh my gosh short and sweet or do i tell her so she is prepared and i would love her to get engaged so we can all plan the hen doing stuff you know wedding dress shopping etc i would love this for her but i don't want her to say yes because she feels like she has to or say no and then affect the relationship with brian oh my god sarah don't say anything for goodness sake please i've attached photo really are you joking i'm not sure in this instance you're telling me no listen listen you're telling me we've got pictures first photo is me sarah and sarah and sister oh looking gorge oh here's a

28:26Sophia Treadway: Brian.

28:30Nicole Riche: Oh, Brian. Really cute. No, listen, listen, listen. Actually, listen. So you're telling me.

28:36Sophia Treadway: I'm telling you.

28:37Nicole Riche: I've got a best friend and she's like, I don't ever want to get engaged. Like, I don't, I'm not getting married. Like, I never want to get married. I will say no. Like, I will say no. Like, I just can't. That's not for me. That's not for me. You're not, I'm like, you're not just going to say,

28:53Sarah, listen.

28:54Nicole Riche: No. no because she doesn't want it Sophia no she doesn't want it it's not like you're ruining the surprise she doesn't want it so it's like look I think he's gonna I think you need to talk to him he's planning this whole thing what you'd rather him plan all this thing and then she's like no you know I don't want to get engaged it's their relationship I just know that exactly

29:14Sophia Treadway: I just think they have been together for four years right how does he have no exactly like maybe things that she said to you in the past like oh I'm not really sure if I'm that bothered about marriage I can't really ever see a wedding like I don't think it'd really be the same because of like her history a but she said may have evolved it may have changed and I'm just thinking like if they've been together for four I know she's your best friend but they will have had you have so many conversations with your partner like long-term partner that you don't relay then to your best friend. Like I'm not, we're not having every, like it's not, I'm not passing along every single piece of information.

29:58Sophia Treadway: And you never know, they may have had private conversations between the two of them where she seemed a bit more open-minded. It's felt a bit more positive because he's obviously thought, like I'd like to think the best of Brian. He's obviously thought, do you know what? I think the time's right. I think she's gonna say, I think she wants this. I think she wants this for us. I don't know. But even if, like, even if she did say no, I just think it's not worth the risk on in any world. Because what if she said yes and you've then ruined her proposal?

30:35Nicole Riche: Well, not necessarily. You've given them a heads up. Like, what was it in Friends when?

30:41Sophia Treadway: Because I think the only thing you could do is if you were really, really worried about it.

30:45Nicole Riche: If this was going to say yes and not want to say yes. If she was keeping you up at night,

30:50Sophia Treadway: you could have your conversation with Brian and be like, I know you've obviously thought this through, but like, this is kind of crazy because from what everything she's told me, like she's not really wanted this. So are you sure? And then he might say, oh yeah, I know, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, yeah. Like you could speak to Brian, but I just would not.

31:07Nicole Riche: But did she say she said to Brian, she tried to Brian?

31:10Sophia Treadway: I would not ever, I would not do that. Just in case, because at the end of the day, it's their relationship. she can say yes or no that's kind of her business sofia she said here she has always said she would say no if someone was to propose so let her say no but don't ruin it because what if she's not ruining it though she don't want it but that's their business that's their relationship right right i just think that is too risky i would chat to brian and say brian she doesn't want to get

31:46Nicole Riche: engaged and then yeah see if he's got anything to say but if he's like i know but i want to then you say something come on oh no i wouldn't no yeah if he's like no she i know she's been saying that but i want to i want to she doesn't want it but let him figure that out he's doing

32:06Sophia Treadway: something crazy no i would let them figure that out they've been together for four years she's not known him six months let them do that that's their thing but if he's going but i don't like it

32:17Nicole Riche: if he's do if he's knows what she wants and is doing the opposite do you know what i mean it's

32:22Sophia Treadway: not considering her at all i don't like that yeah but then she'll say no or she'll say yes and then it won't happen like at the end of the day you're not going anywhere you will probably be like one of the first face time when she gets back from the holiday and they're not together whatever like you know she's in her room and maybe he's in the living room and then you can put the world to rights and be like oh my god I've been so stressed like I wanted to tell you but I wasn't sure or like what if she FaceTimes you like oh my god I can't believe it I'm so happy and then you're like thank fuck because I almost told you he was gonna do it I don't think it's worth the risk personally

32:53Nicole Riche: I'm not sure Jinzy's not sure yeah you do with that what you will you got two different opinions

32:58Sophia Treadway: yeah that's why my Brian didn't tell Jinzy he was gonna propose yeah imagine I wouldn't dare on my

33:04Nicole Riche: life exactly but she said she's never wanted to get engaged I know she has said I will say no so do you just does she want to put him through that like I don't know it's completely different

33:17Sophia Treadway: but if you as the best friend know that she's always said no then surely her partner of four

33:23Nicole Riche: years knows her stance on marriage exactly so why so either he's doing it be like oh well I just want to do it anyway like I know she said that well that's not fair she doesn't want that like Yeah, but then she can say no. It's a question. Yeah, yeah. It's got a question mark at the end of it. I do think the heads up is like, I'll give you a heads up, babe.

33:42Sophia Treadway: No, I won't give you a heads up, but I'll give you a therapy session afterwards. But I could not. The risk, it's too risky.

33:50Nicole Riche: Yeah, but she said she don't want it. She said she don't want it. No. Anyway, let's see. It's too risky. Let us know what happens.

33:58Sophia Treadway: We're on opposite sides. Let us know what happens, please. God. I mean, if she does say no, I think she's gonna say well yeah and then he's sure he's gonna be like oh well I gave it a try

34:10Nicole Riche: but then what if she's like I've always told you why why would you do that yeah like I'd be really like if I told my you know boyfriend of four years something for four years and then he just went against yeah something you know that I've believed in it's like why like do you even why would you even do that like I that's how I would be I'd be like yeah so I feel

34:27Sophia Treadway: but I would let them sort it out as a couple first before like I started getting involved yeah but then what she's like you knew why didn't you tell me well I didn't know

34:37Nicole Riche: yeah but what if she's like speak to Brian first yeah yeah yeah he maybe he has his reasons who knows yeah oh god maybe she's preg yeah maybe there's something that you don't know maybe he's thinking oh my god I need to tie this knot yeah right maybe she will say yes She's like, I'm pregnant. That's why. Yeah, I'm having this baby.

34:57Sophia Treadway: Yeah, we don't know. Best surprise of my life. Yeah. You're thinking, thank God I listened to Sophia on that podcast. I don't know, babe.

35:09Sophia Treadway: Hey, it's Paige from Giggly Squad. You know when you finally get started on a project around the house and then five minutes in you realize you're missing one thing? Somehow it's always that one thing that sends you back to the store. That's why I love this from Lowe's. If you're a MyLowe's Rewards or MyLowe's Pro Rewards member, you get free same-day delivery. Honestly, Lowe's will make the run for you, making it that much easier to get what you need. Just place your order and Lowe's handles the rest. It seriously makes life so much easier, especially when you've already got a million things going on.

35:42Sophia Treadway: Members get more at Lowe's. $25 minimum and loyalty membership required. Order eligible items by 2 p.m., subject to weight and size restrictions and availability. Terms at lowes.com slash shipping terms. You're a pro at running your life, at committing to your workout, at showing up every day. At Bombas, we're pros too. Pros at making socks. Our sport assortment has specialized socks for whatever sport you're committed to. Running, hiking, golf, Pilates, and so much more. Made with sweat-wicking yarns, blister-fighting details, and targeted art support. Bombas Sport is pro-level socks from the pros of socks.

36:19Sophia Treadway: For another pro, you. Go to bombas.com slash audio and use code audio for 20 % off your first purchase. That's bombas.com and use code audio.

36:34Sophia Treadway: Okay, next dilemma. Mother-in-law mayhem and a Thai dilemma. Thai?

36:43Nicole Riche: What does that mean?

36:44Sophia Treadway: T-H-A-I, Thai.

36:46Nicole Riche: Oh, Thai.

36:48Sophia Treadway: Good morning, girlies. Hope you're both thriving, living your best lives. You're doing all right, Sarah. Thank you. We're a bit hot, but other than that, we're feeling good. Just wanted to say how much I adore the pod. It's my comfort lesson. Thank you much, Sarah. So, bit of a backstory. I met my boyfriend, let's call him Brian, just over two years ago while traveling. And we ended up doing the long distance thing until I eventually moved to his country to be with him. I'd just finished uni. we weren't in a place to rent so I temporarily moved in with his family while we saved for a house. We gave ourselves a six-month timeline and by some miracle we did it.

37:24Sophia Treadway: We bought our first home last month and have finally moved in and settled. Congratulations Sarah and Brian that is lovely news. Here's where it gets messy. Before I moved in properly I'd fly over on weekends or uni breaks to visit and stay with his family. They always seemed lovely and welcoming, but once I officially moved in, let's just say the vibes shifted. His mum in particular started showing some questionable behavior. It started small, you know, strict house rules and weird comments, but it escalated. For example, during the house buying process, things were slow as they always are so we didn't have many updates to share you know daily one day we finally got the completion date went downstairs all excited to share the news and invite the family over once we'd moved in instead of celebrating with us his mum exploded yelling that we hadn't involved her it totally tainted what should have been a special moment okay so she was feeling very out of the loop there were other things too you're not buying a house

38:34Nicole Riche: Yeah, see, you've bought your ass, Sarah. I'm living in it. Yeah, like...

38:38Sophia Treadway: Controlling when we could do laundry. Stop. I'm a nurse and she'd only let us wash clothes before 8 a.m. or after 8 p.m.

38:47Nicole Riche: What do you mean?

38:48Sophia Treadway: I've got to go to bed, Sarah. Come put in a wash on at 8. It's not going to finish till 9. We've got to hang it up.

38:53Nicole Riche: A wash on at 7 a.m.?

38:55Sophia Treadway: Shouting at Brian for showering at the wrong time. Yeah, this isn't good. It's feeling micromanaged. This isn't good. Getting involved in her daughter's relationship to the point of trying to break them up. The energy was just off.

39:08Nicole Riche: Like surely she would be happy that she's got her son and new daughter-in-law in the house. Like, oh, just stay longer. Yeah, please stay. Yeah, but like, yeah. That's our picky bits for tea.

39:19Sophia Treadway: Yeah, like. A few weeks into being in our new home, I still felt this tension, almost like she had it in for me. Brian went over to try and speak to his parents about it, hoping to clear the air. but it ended up in a full-blown screaming match they insisted on a formal sit down to resolve

39:37Nicole Riche: things oh my god i'd be sick formal sit down yeah i have not got an appetite on the lead up to this

39:42Sophia Treadway: can't sleep so they came to our house later that day what followed oh my god sorry so everything used to be fine she because she would visit at the weekends and like here and there then when she moved in she's saying things just shifted like really strict house rules just the vibes weren't right but now they're obviously in their own home but she's saying the tension's still there so even though we're not living there anymore each other we just got into it brian said like sarah's feeling like maybe things aren't right and then the mum started exploding oh my so you've

40:18Nicole Riche: You've been to change your formal sit down,

40:22Sophia Treadway: resolve things, kettles on vibe.

40:24Nicole Riche: I'd actually be sick.

40:25Sophia Treadway: His mum, oh my God. I'd actually be sick. His mum ended up screaming, pointing in my face, telling me I'm the problem and that I need to respect my in-laws. Sarah. I bet. Mrs. Mother-in-law, we're under my roof now. Thank you very much. I'll kick you out. I'm paying the council tax. It's my rules. I calmly said respect is mutual that's a good line Sarah respect is mutual Sarah shit and I have my own boundaries and I didn't like her attitude towards me or Brian which did not go down

41:03Nicole Riche: in the house okay you spoke this right okay

41:07Sophia Treadway: there's a lot of yelling and a lot of tears they left with no apology Brian has backed me up the whole way and thankfully agrees his mum is completely out of order

41:17Nicole Riche: okay that's good Jesus

41:19Sophia Treadway: it's gonna be an awkward Christmas when we get round to it

41:22Nicole Riche: but it's just like what why oh my god as a mother would you have it out for the the girlfriend of your son like I'd want to be besties I know like I know

41:34Sophia Treadway: so has our Sarah well this is where the tie comes into it we are supposed to be going to Thailand for Christmas for his parents right 60th birthday for three weeks oh And it's going to cost me a fortune.

41:48Nicole Riche: Oh my God, it's White Lotus. Someone's going to die.

41:50Sophia Treadway: Oh my God.

41:51Nicole Riche: That actually is severe. It's going to be a murder mystery. Did you watch the new series where dads trying to kill their children?

41:59Sophia Treadway: Spoiler alert.

42:00Nicole Riche: Yeah. So like, I'd be careful. And there's some poisonous fruit on some trees out there, right? That he was putting in smoothies to kill them. All right. So I actually wouldn't go, Sarah. Like, seriously. Like, she might have watched White Lotus and thought, yeah we're gonna take everyone to Thailand and I'm gonna get those groups and I'm gonna put them in a fucking pina colada and I'm gonna kill her. You do not actually know. Shit. Or just don't drink anything that she hands you at least. Yeah. Seriously. Oh God I'm worried now. That was the whole storyline sphere was these fucking fruit and these trees and trying to kill people with them.

42:34Nicole Riche: Oh my God.

42:35Sophia Treadway: Yeah. Sorry to anyone who's not got around to watching season three yet.

42:38Nicole Riche: Yeah innit like come on.

42:40Sophia Treadway: Okay so big family holiday.

42:42Nicole Riche: So Thailand three weeks right. Right.

42:44Sophia Treadway: My mom, sister and best friends are telling me not to go. Right. That's your answer.

42:49Nicole Riche: If your own mother is saying that.

42:51Sophia Treadway: But Brian's begging me to come, asking me to just get along with her for his sake. And I am so torn. I love him. I love Thailand, but I genuinely don't know if I can emotionally stomach being around her pretending like none of this has happened. What would you do? Do I go and suck it up for the sake of peace or do I stand my ground and say no?

43:13Nicole Riche: Are we in a house all together or are we separate?

43:16Sophia Treadway: She's not set, but we're there for three weeks. Fucking hell. Big family trip. Surely it's one house then. Yeah. Villa vibes. Are we all in the same hotel? Are we moving around?

43:27Nicole Riche: Surely we're not. Yeah.

43:28Sophia Treadway: P.S. Brian said, with or without me, he's still going. You might have to go. I've got an issue now with Brian, but that's a separate problem. He might have, you might have to go. Really?

43:43Nicole Riche: It's Christmas. Wait, is it over Christmas? Yeah. Yeah. I didn't get that.

43:48Sophia Treadway: It's over Christmas. Although his mum has been out of order, it's for his dad's birthday too. Okay, that's kind of fair. And his siblings are going. His dad is so lovely and has never spoken to me with disrespect. Please help him spiraling.

44:03Nicole Riche: We might have to go. Because boyfriend's not going anywhere. Love the boyfriend. You are going to... One day we're going to have kids. It's like, she is going to be in this, in your life. And it's like, look, maybe, you know, she just needs a bit of Thai food and some sun and she'll loosen up. Like, I don't know. Yeah, a bit of green curry. And like, maybe it could be like, do you know what? We actually got through that. It was quite beautiful. We made some great memories. Yeah, we had some nice memories. Yeah, actually, this is very mature.

44:29Sophia Treadway: I like this.

44:29Nicole Riche: Like, maybe when like the siblings are there and the dad's there. The heat's not on you. And she's in the sun and she's got her feet up. She's got a pina colada that you've made. She can just like relax. And I think we could probably. yes you know that's a really good point if brian's going anyway and you're not going that's a bad luck not that we care about this mom anyway because she's been awful but then you've got your boyfriend it's not going to help the cause i think maybe might have to just go and then just try and try and have your own couple time date nights maybe you guys get things on your own so it's like you're not feeling suffocated by her.

45:10Nicole Riche: I wonder if the siblings - And maybe try and have another chat before we go to try and clear some of this air.

45:16Sophia Treadway: I wonder if any of the siblings have got partners and how they get on with the -

45:20Nicole Riche: Yeah, that's a good - With the mill. That's good thoughts. Yeah. Maybe connect with them. But also like -

45:27Sophia Treadway: You know, if you are like, because it's kind of hard when like your mom, your friends, your sister saying, don't go, it's horrible. I know. Maybe you could say to Brian, um i like i need to feel like i'm in a better place with your family before i go on this trip so i don't know how many more sit down meetings we need yeah but like maybe one or two more six months do you know what i mean maybe every tuesday six p.m before christmas like let's try and get on

45:58Nicole Riche: a good vibe you know why don't we start with a sunday roast happy to be carvery crowd pleaser Like mac and cheese. Like surely, you know, we can have a nice time. Yeah. Toby Carvery. We could share your. And just try and be able to. What's the word? Not palate her. Digest her.

46:17Sophia Treadway: Yeah. Is that the word? Kill her with kindness.

46:19Nicole Riche: Yeah.

46:19Sophia Treadway: You just want to hang out with her without confrontation. Like we don't need to be the best of friends. I mean, listen. But I don't know why you've got so much anger towards me. I'm scared.

46:28Nicole Riche: Obviously she thinks you did something while you were in her home or something. Yeah. Yeah, do you think that's what it is? She obviously felt like you disrespected her while under her roof. So ask her, what is it? Like, what did I do? Yeah, what's the problem? Like, come on, let's actually try and like, what is it?

46:43Sophia Treadway: Yeah.

46:44Nicole Riche: You know?

46:45Sophia Treadway: Maybe try and have a one-on-one combo, not when the whole family's around. Like, you know, just the girlies. Let's have a sit down.

46:51Nicole Riche: Maybe, yeah, bring us some flowers. I don't know. Like, we want to try and mend this relationship. I think if, yeah, I think, yeah, you're right.

46:58Sophia Treadway: You know, we'd probably do. You bought a house with Brian. You're pretty settled in. it would make your life easier if you could try and get along.

47:05Nicole Riche: Because I'm just thinking about when you're preggo, yeah, and that baby's on the way, you want to at least be able to, you know, have a nice conversation with this lady. Otherwise, it's going to be, and you want your child to have that grandma. Yeah. Such a shame that she's being so difficult.

47:26Sophia Treadway: But we might make great memories in Thailand. What triggered her?

47:29Nicole Riche: Obviously something triggered her.

47:30Sophia Treadway: yeah something you did summon Sarah maybe yeah but like let's ask her anyway let's bring it out to the surface I guess we'll hear in January happy holidays

47:48Nicole Riche: right buckle up last one we've got here bridesmaid drama can I sack my bridesmaid only a week after I asked her oh that's fresh now did you not think it through yeah I mean she must have done something did we act too soon she must have done something recently though I'm assuming in the past seven days it's giving Harry making Helena exclusive and then wanting to go back to Shakira all right Shakira Shakira hi girls love the part been a long-time listener but never had to write in

48:20Sophia Treadway: Taylor's oldest time I know go on Sarah what have you got for us I have some bridesmaid drama I

48:25Nicole Riche: would like your perspective on for a bit of backstory i have been with my brian for over seven years we got engaged last summer and are getting married next september oh congratulations sarah i asked my four i asked my four closest friends to be bridesmaids a week ago now they are not part of the same friendship group but have all met before when we went on a girls day to my wedding venue to have a look around oh three of my bridesmaids have been incredible and I'm so lucky to have them. Three of them. Remember this fall. They have also been amazing planners and managed to sort out my entire hen do in the space of a week.

49:03Nicole Riche: In a week?

49:04Sophia Treadway: Jesus. These girls have been chomping at the bit for this. Yeah.

49:07Nicole Riche: Everything is being kept a surprise for me, but I know it will be next August. However, one of my friends has caused a lot of drama and I'm now considering asking her not to be a bridesmaid. Already? or whether that will look like I'm just being a bride sale. This friend, Sarah, and I have been close friends since we were 15. For context, we are now 27 and I am her only friend. She does have mild anxiety and isn't in the same financial situation as the rest of us, which has never been an issue as I always accommodate to her. After asking all of the girls to be my bridesmaids, I created a group chat and put in my ideas for the hen.

49:51Nicole Riche: The inspo think we can stay in a house with max 15 of my close friends. Gorge. Themed cocktail nights, you know, color party at the house, you know, silly bride games, spa vibes, you know, group activities during the day. Gorge, Sarah. Sounds great. The girls then made a separate chat to start planning straight away based on, you know, what I would like. Just the four of them. And I wouldn't have to be involved or stressed about anything and they you know just want to keep it a surprise i get a text the next day from sarah saying that the hen was going to cost 245 pound per person and she didn't know whether whether what the girls were planning was what i would want and if i would prefer something more cozy as she couldn't afford to come one of the other bridesmaid had offered to pay up front for her and said she could pay her back as little as 10 pounds a month if need if need be for context they have all been really lovely to her okay so she said look that's a bit much for me i can't afford that why don't we do something cozier one of the bridesmaids said look i'll i'll i'll cover it and you could just pay me back 10 pounds a month right she's also saying to you i'm not sure if this is really what you want yeah she's yeah which i appreciate um i replied saying that my ideas in the group chat were what I was hoping for and that if she was worried about money I'm sure we could figure something out or if she didn't feel comfortable with what was being planned that she could come to the family hen which would be really small and likely an afternoon tea okay yeah something for the mums and the grands so she's not missing out yeah okay that's nice I reassured her if she couldn't come to the main hen I wouldn't be upset with her at all as I totally understand her financial situation of being a mature student she then proceeded to send a couple of very long messages trying to manipulate me into going with her ideas for the hen oh and projected her own issues onto me which would have made it the exact opposite of what i had asked for sarah made out i wasn't being authentic to myself and was trying to convince me i didn't actually want what i had asked for saying you love reading your books and doing DIY crafts etc you're not for

52:02Sophia Treadway: a fucking hen do you say this is my one last night and that i'd be uncomfortable being the

52:07Nicole Riche: center of attention and will be overwhelmed with that many people this is her projecting her own insecurities onto me i try to explain that whilst i do love reading and doing those things same i can do those things anytime on my own i wouldn't want that for my hen as it's a once-in-a-lifetime experience with all my closest friends and i wouldn't mind being center of attention at all it's my own hen do yeah she also did the same in the bridesmaids group chat with the other girls and said things like this isn't the version of the bride that I know she wouldn't want x y and z um tried to ask other girls to lie to me and say that they couldn't find anywhere for that many people or it was too expensive and just go somewhere for the day as the five of us with no activities or anything she never did give them a rough budget of what she could afford when they were trying to accommodate for her she just kept telling them that they didn't know me like she did when it's clear, especially from this, the other girls do know me way more.

53:05Nicole Riche: She then stopped replying to the other girls in the chat. Okay, so she's kind of panicking. She's being a bit frantic. She's sabotaging. You know, she can't afford it. She's trying to steer everyone away. She's lying. She's manipulating. You are the saboteur. She then accused me of upsetting her and trying to have a luxury hand-do and that she thought it would be more important to me that she could come. right so now she's saying oh don't you even start with me sarah that's manipulation right

53:35Sophia Treadway: are you joking oh so that's more important than me coming at this rate yeah i didn't know you were

53:40Nicole Riche: so luxury i thought you would rather me come than it'd be so luxury right yeah so it's like oh no don't make me feel bad like no like also the girls are giving you an option to come like yeah pay her

53:54Sophia Treadway: back 10 pounds a month but basically sounds like something that she doesn't really want to do and she's just trying to make it so it's not your hem babes she then it sounds like she doesn't want you to be celebrated as well and it sounds like she doesn't really like she doesn't really want you to have the fuss that you're wanting yeah it's interesting because i don't know if

54:16Nicole Riche: it's all stemming from because i don't know why she'd not say to you know the other person oh my god thank you so much for covering for me me neither yeah i feel like i've never seen this side to her before likely because I always accommodate to her she's been really manipulative tried to guilt trip me and genuinely just being quite selfish and making all about her there will be other costs associated with being a bridesmaid you know minimal which I have since laid out in a really nice message to essentially see if she would like to remain bridesmaid as I don't want her to worry about the cost of a dress or whatever yeah she told me she would get back to me okay so you know you're being considerate you're saying look i appreciate your financial situation we're looking at a dress it's probably going to cost 80 pounds give you a heads up now you know because i'm not going to cover for that also if we want makeup and hair it may cost 100 pounds you know if you can't afford it i can't afford to pay for you as well step out now i think that's fair she said she's going to think about it she says she'll get back to you okay she texted me last night to tell me she decided not to come to the hen do this has caused me so much stress this week when i wasn't even meant to have any involvement my other bridesmaids think she's been really selfish and are really annoyed that she's told me the price oh okay so it's like the illusion yeah the illusion is gone yeah so now you know it's two four five each yeah all right yeah i hear that a price which everyone else has found on the cheapest side i went to a weekend hen last year that cost 400 pounds so i thought 250 was a good deal especially when everyone has a year until the hen to put a little aside each month if they would like to come my fiance is planning to go abroad for his hen which will cost considerably more and he knows his friends will make the effort to go i really don't want her to be a bridesmaid anymore that's it then that's your answer yeah we're only a week in and i can see her causing issues with every single thing going forwards do you think i would be justified in asking her not to be a bridesmaid or will i come off as a bridezilla nope sack her off pics attached she's lost her job she's unemployed me and brian and my bridesmaids the pictures aren't attached and congratulations to severe on your engagement oh thanks sarah right congratulations to you too i just think it's a bit of a shame so you're she's scared that she's going to be considered a bridezilla yeah if you remove sarah as bridesmaid who cares own it i feel i also don't think it's

56:48Sophia Treadway: bridesilla ish at all i really don't me neither i think you've been really quite accommodating yeah it sounds like the other bridesmaids have also been very accommodating sounds like you were

56:57Nicole Riche: considering her and the extra costs of being a bridesmaid it's like okay yeah i'm really sorry that you're struggling to to attend the hen heads up this is going to cost this as well yeah maybe you know we should consider you not yeah would you be happier actually just to be a just to be a guest so maybe the pressure because it is pressure and it is responsibility and it is

57:20Sophia Treadway: expensive it is expensive and you're just sort of saying like look I obviously still love you want you to be there but I'm feeling like you're maybe not enjoying this so far I'm feeling like you actually would be happier not having to do this and that is totally fine by me like just because I've asked you something yeah doesn't mean you've had to say yes like maybe let's reevaluate I just think at the end of the day who cares if you're gonna I don't think it's

57:47Nicole Riche: bridesmaids at all when you're trying on bridesmaids dress exactly oh it's literally like bridesmaids just like I think we should go for this cheap one yeah like and you're like no I don't want that

57:56Sophia Treadway: dress like it's gonna cause more stress problems going forward I think like we're only a week in you've literally already said I don't really think I want her as a bridesmaid anymore I think that's your answer like it's your wedding it's your choice she's not like she's kind of been on bad form anyway with trying to put in your head like oh so you'd rather luxury than like no no we're not saying that Sarah like I've told you I've told all the girls what I want don't try and tell me what I want isn't what I want it's just they are there to take the stress off of you and she is bringing you she's doing the opposite of what she's supposed to be doing so I would just word it very nicely and just say like hey Sarah I know it's been like a bit of an emotional week and you know I know we've had a lot of like you know talk about blah blah blah I've made the decision that actually I think it's best for us both if you actually don't if you step down from the bridesmaid role I'm just going to go ahead I wouldn't pose it too much as a question because I think she'll be like she'll try and twist it I would just say like I've decided out of the hen do yeah i think in response to that it's like okay since you know we've had all this going on

59:07Nicole Riche: and i i'm worried about these extra costs i think it's best that we i agree yeah don't you you aren't a part of the bridal party but obviously still a part of the wedding yeah like do you know what you could understand like well she might not she probably won't but she might not yeah i was gonna

59:26Sophia Treadway: to say you could do the other option of you could say okay take away the bridesmaid thing but you could say to her as an olive branch like I would love you to be my something blue and she can wear

59:37Nicole Riche: something blue that's cute and then like she's not a bridesmaid she's not got any of these do you want to give her that honor I don't think I don't know I'm just saying like yeah if if you

59:47Sophia Treadway: wanted like I know people have done that where it's like I don't actually want you as a bridesmaid but you are one of my closest friends and I want you to be recognized but the bridesmaid's role doesn't really fit. So I want you to wear like, you're my something blue. That's an option. That is cute.

1:00:01Nicole Riche: If that feels like it fits, that could work. If you want to bestow that honor upon her. Yeah. Absolutely. And just, you have to gently remove from the chat. I think you're not being a bride, Zilla. She's causing you stress. She's not coming to the hen do. I think you're within your right. And let's just nip it in the bud.

1:00:13Sophia Treadway: Like let's, we're falling at the first hurdle. It's been a week. Let's just, that never happened.

1:00:18Nicole Riche: This is going to go on for over a year until the fucking wedding.

1:00:21Sophia Treadway: Yeah, and it's going to be a theme, I feel like. Yeah, I think so. So.

1:00:24Nicole Riche: Well, bon chance, Sarah. Bon chance. Happy wedding. Should we find ourselves a quote? Keep us posted.

1:00:30Sophia Treadway: Yeah, I think we need it, don't we? Let's have a bit of wisdom.

1:00:32Nicole Riche: Absolutely.

1:00:33Sophia Treadway: Right, let's see what's on Pinterest today.

1:00:35Nicole Riche: Yeah, I'm just going to dive into my pin. Oh.

1:00:38Sophia Treadway: Oh, what she found.

1:00:39Nicole Riche: No, listen. I didn't type anything in. Okay, it's meant to be. I was on my explore page. And I think this is actually to do with our last girl. Shit. all right let's have it to the point but i fear i fear it would actually uh speak to you sarah stop being so fucking forgiving people know exactly what the fuck they're doing whoa is that quite aggressive but i like it she knew what she was doing with all that yeah don't play done with me sarah like that was actually meant to find us today i like that yeah that was meant to find us the energy we need for the rest of the week i know what the fuck you're doing yeah you're like actually you're not a bridesmaid no yeah like you knew you're doing trying to put ideas in my head and trying to manipulate me yeah yeah like remove from the chat absolutely not right well cheers everyone thank you everyone um yeah if you would like a bonus episode of the pod

1:01:31Sophia Treadway: you can get it every single monday over on our patreon we do two episodes a week and you can also email your dilemmas to hello at the girls bathroom.com followers on instagram tiktok and on YouTube, please. Thank you. Love ya. Love ya. See you on Monday. Or if not, we'll see you on Wednesday. Bye.

1:01:53Nicole Riche: So you're not worried about hosting the whole family for the holidays? Why would I be? Wayfair had everything I needed to get the house holiday ready.

1:01:59Sophia Treadway: What if Mike brings his cheerful dogs?

1:02:02Nicole Riche: My tree has tons of five-star reviews telling me how sturdy it is.

1:02:05Sophia Treadway: But what if everyone's plus one brings a plus one?

1:02:08Nicole Riche: We'll see how extendable this extendable table really is. And extra chairs are on the way.

1:02:12Sophia Treadway: Okay, what if there's a blizzard and everyone has to sleep over?

1:02:15Nicole Riche: Ready to go with extra bedding and towels. From guest-ready essentials to holiday decor you can trust. Wayfair delivers.

1:02:23Sophia Treadway: Hey guys, it's Paige from Giggly Squad. Okay, can we all agree that hosting is so much fun? And I really do love it. Every weekend, it's come over for snacks, let's make dinner together, and somehow the second you put out a fruit platter, it seems that bugs show up before your friends do. This is why I have to have my Zeevo flying insect trap. You plug it in and you let it do all the work. It's specially designed blue and UV light attracts the bugs you didn't know you had. And wow, did we have a lot. Like houseflies, fruit flies, gnats. And then with Zeevo, bam. Next thing you know, the pests are caught in the sticky cartridge and away from your yummy treats without any mess or strong odors.

1:03:03Sophia Treadway: The best part is the design is actually sleek and curved. So it hides the bugs it catches, keeping them out of sight. And when the cartridge is full, you just grab the no mess tab, throw it in the trash, pop in a new cartridge, and then you're done. No mess, no stress. So whether you're hosting a dinner party or spending an afternoon baking treats with all your friends, and you want to focus on hosting and not constantly swatting at bugs, Zivo has you covered with 24-7 bug protection. Plug in a Zeevo Flying Insect Trap so you can work smarter, not harder, and actually enjoy your time at home.

1:03:37Nicole Riche: Hey guys, it's Drew from the comment section. Some days my skin just needs a little coverage and other days I want to go full glam. For those everyday moments like running errands or grabbing coffee, I've been loving the Merit Minimalist Stick because it's a foundation and concealer in one that gives me a really natural skin-like finish. But when I want more coverage, I'm reaching for the Hourglass Vanish Concealer every time. I know I'm not the only one who struggled to find the right foundation or concealer shade, which is why I always shop at Sephora. They have the best brands all in one place with so many shades, coverage options and finishes, plus expert beauty advisors, free samples and shade matching tools both online and in store.

1:04:17Nicole Riche: So whether you're looking for barely there coverage or full glam, Sephora can help you find your match.

1:04:22Sophia Treadway: While every other channel is fighting for your customers' attention, podcasts are where they've already given it. No one accidentally listens to a podcast for 45 minutes. They choose to be here. They trust the voice in their ears. And when that voice talks about your brand, it doesn't sound like advertising. It sounds like a recommendation from a friend. Acast gives you that trust at scale. Digital precision, post-read authenticity, and performance data that proves it worked. Don't fight for attention. Buy it with Acast. Learn more by visiting acast.com slash advertise.

1:04:57Thank you.