Girl Talk: His mum BANNED me from their house?!

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1:11Sarah Ashcroft: Let's get this party started right. What's that song? Fill the blank. Let's get this party started right. Never heard that song before.

1:24Sarah Davidson: Oh, there she goes. from Shark Tale. Absolutely, yeah. See, I don't think they make, they need to make more. It's Christina Aguilera when she's a jellyfish. Yeah, they need to make more films like about the ocean. More cartoon films about the ocean. Well, we've got Nemo, Finding Dory. Yeah, but new. That was like 20 years ago.

1:45Sarah Ashcroft: Finding Dory was not 20 years ago. Maybe 15 years ago. No, it was like five.

1:49Sarah Davidson: You're 30, I'm 30.

1:51Sarah Ashcroft: I'm 27.

1:53Sarah Davidson: We were probably about 15.

1:54Sarah Ashcroft: I'm still mid. Yeah, Shark Tale's a classic. Yeah, it's a good one. Oscar, the shark slayer. And Angelina Jolie's in that as well, if you've deeped that.

2:05Sarah Davidson: That's iconic. I'm not actually, we didn't even know that. Yeah, and Lola. Let me take a picture of Blueberry right now, because this is actually gorgeous. Okay, yeah, never seen before shot. Yeah, Blueberry. Blueberry is freshly groomed. She is. We've got into her beauty regimen routine, and it's every four weeks, fresh groom. Just getting, you know, it's almost like - Maintaining. It's like high maintenance to stay low maintenance. No, it totally is because she almost looked the same when she came out, but just she didn't. She'd have the trim. And that's the best. You want to go into your beauty trim.

2:34Sarah Davidson: You kind of look the same, but just like a little bit. Yeah. It's like we don't need to let you get like so raggedy, you know, and disheveled and haggard. Absolutely. It's almost like my laser appointments every four weeks. Every four weeks. Just keep on top of it. It would be good if I could time at the same time. Yeah. Drop her off. Go there. That would be cute, wouldn't it? Really cute. Yeah. We've got the perfect drink lineup today.

2:55Sarah Ashcroft: Welcome back, everyone. happy wednesday clock it we're both in our jackets spring jackets i would say this jacket i've worn i've worn it every day for about a month first episode chintzy's got hair extensions back

3:07Sarah Davidson: clock it eat it up eat it up eat it right now yeah 22 inch bombs yeah 22 inches yeah 22 inches My hair? Clark it. Yeah, got the three quarter length on as well. Sleeve. Yeah, get them out there. Represent. Got a bit of forearm on show. Represent. And we're ready to buckle up and lock in. Are you ready to dive into this week's episode? I'm always ready to dive in. Let's dive in then. Absolutely, I'm going to take a sip of my pink drink.

3:44Sarah Ashcroft: so it's girl talk and our question of the week is this is one for you me and me us what's something

3:55Sarah Davidson: you've done that you still haven't told your friends about you know the the secret is it's move slow and low okay don't tell everyone everything move slow and low my brain took a

4:07Sarah Ashcroft: wow to realize what the secret is move slow and low move in silence okay don't tell anyone you next well i mean like evil eye is a thing so i agree i agree like don't tell people stuff i think keep your cards close to your chest here you know my veggie friend ate me and i told her it was a

4:28Sarah Davidson: mushroom because i felt bad my veggie friend right so you made your veggie stir by because when you said veggie friend my mind went straight to the ai fruits the ai vegetables what's she called apollina or something apollina and urino your brain's writing purino your brain's writing yeah

4:47Sarah Ashcroft: so so say that again she's veggie as am i absolutely uh ate meat yeah and i told her it was mushroom because i felt bad so i think she said i think that's innocent i think that's

4:59Sarah Davidson: innocent don't let the veggie know they've just ate meat they don't know any different ignorance

5:02Sarah Ashcroft: is bliss yeah i agree not so innocent my cousin's husband kissed me oh my not the cousin's husband

5:09Sarah Davidson: uh i'm pregnant night wow no one knows no one knows oh wow well congratulations

5:16Sarah Ashcroft: bailed my driving test four times oh i mean happens to the best of us happens to all of us babe i've signed up for a half marathon never ran in my life it's nice to keep that you know on the choir yeah because otherwise it's too much pressure yeah because i never was checking in on

5:30Sarah Davidson: you you know if you wanted to quit there's this pressure went on holiday with my ex-boyfriend

5:35Sarah Ashcroft: look i can understand why you want to keep that on the table yeah sometimes you've just got to do things like that uh ate my boyfriend's ass okay yeah i want a little bit of poopito i use my best friend's toothbrush whenever i stay over yeah worse things i mean i wouldn't want to use your toothbrush no but i use brian's toothbrush yeah like if that's in the shower

6:01Sarah Davidson: sorry i'm just gonna use it now yeah you know what you're you are one i'm kind of accepting

6:05Sarah Ashcroft: of that made pros and cons lists of all their boyfriends i would keep that on the download

6:12Sarah Davidson: yeah i would i would yeah i would i'd be i wouldn't be announcing that you know after a few

6:16Sarah Ashcroft: cocktails guess what i've got pros and cons on your boyfriend i support it i support it in private i

6:24Sarah Davidson: I feel like it's something I would enjoy in a pastime. This is something that you need to share with the group.

6:31Sarah Ashcroft: Chinster actually wrote this in. Been to sex parties. Oh, very exotic. Gave head in the utility room of our uni house. Wow. Wow. It's going to be a sad day when you move out of there and leave those memories behind. Had sex with my ex. He's engaged with a family.

6:51Sarah Davidson: Oh, Sarah, babe. You didn't do anything wrong, I guess, technically. Technically. You're single, girl. Technically. Technically. So we've got, what's something you've done that you still haven't told your friends about? I clogged the toilet on a trip and had to dig it out and put it in the trash. Very chintzy-coated. I think that's very Sophia Texel-coated. She's got a loose bum hole, I think. I use my best friend's vibrator.

7:24Sarah Davidson: I mean desperate times but like I would not

7:27Sarah Ashcroft: that is not okay like take the toothbrush any day please those juices don't need

7:32Sarah Davidson: to winter twine base we don't need to be swapping that fingered my boyfriend's bum no look some like he obviously wanted that some men like a finger in the woman had an affair so well ask them questions on Ask.fm are we still using Ask.fm then? is it not being shut down? It must still be about, or maybe she's confessing from her past. Okay. We've all asked questions on Ask a Fam.

7:58Sarah Ashcroft: But remember when like you would get, you would say to your friend, like, ask me this so I can answer it.

8:04Sarah Davidson: Oh, really? Yeah.

8:05Sarah Ashcroft: We would do that.

8:07Sarah Davidson: Interesting.

8:07Sarah Ashcroft: It would be like, what do you want to reveal? Like, tell me what you want me to ask you.

8:11Sarah Davidson: Well, I want to tell the population of the Beckett school. That I fancy, that I think the fittest boy in Nicholas is.

8:23Sarah Ashcroft: He wasn't in Nicholas.

8:25Sarah Davidson: Why do I know that? Oh, I see. He was in my form.

8:27Sarah Ashcroft: Yeah, he was. Wasn't he in the yellow one? Oh, no, he wasn't. Sorry. He was Anna O'Sullivan. Why do I know that? I can picture his blazer, this little thing on his blazer. The red. I thought it was yellow.

8:37Sarah Davidson: No, he was red. No?

8:39Sarah Ashcroft: I was orange. He was your crush. You were Nicholas. I was Patrick. That's nice. Patrick was a good one. Everyone wanted to be in Patrick.

8:46Sarah Davidson: Did they? No one wanted to be in Nicholas, remember? No, Nicholas was like, loser. Loserville. Losers. What was the red one called? Didn't like anyone from red. What was the yellow one called? Yellow was Teresa.

8:59Sarah Ashcroft: Anna O'Sullivan was Teresa.

9:01Sarah Davidson: I would have liked to have been in Teresa.

9:03Sarah Ashcroft: Yes. Red. Purple. The boy who you sent in last night was in purple.

9:08Sarah Davidson: Oh, memories. Memories. You know, everyone's still watching my stories. You know, clock it. I'm clocking you all from the Beckett School, yeah? I'm always in my story views. But what was purple? Was it Edmund or something? St. Augustine or something?

9:25Sarah Ashcroft: Bernadette. Bernadette. Bernadette was purple. So we had Patrick. There were six.

9:32Sarah Davidson: Are these all saints then?

9:33Sarah Ashcroft: Yeah, St. Patrick. Of course. St. Augustine. Wait, why did I keep St. Augustine? There was a school called St. Augustine. Was there Edmund? Was Edmund Red? But wait, what was the third one? It's going to bug me. Patrick, Teresa. Nicholas, Teresa. Yeah. Nicholas Teresa Patrick Edmund we're missing two I keep saying Bernadette Bernadette yeah what's the last one I keep saying

10:02Sarah Davidson: Augustus Augustine

10:05Sarah Ashcroft: I don't know what were the colours we're missing a colour blue who was blue what was blue who the hell was in blue Mary no

10:17Sarah Davidson: Emmanuel no what that was the school that's where Youngsy and Bugsy went shout out to school shop

10:28Sarah Davidson: who was blue what the hell was blue and Letitia Wright congrats on your baby baby anyway

10:36Sarah Ashcroft: that was real Nottingham we've got to move on

10:39Sarah Davidson: congrats on your baby when I talk to Lydia that was real nots law that was when I talk to my mum and Lydia I go full Nottingham Nottingham Nottingham wait okay yeah you keep going

10:49Sarah Ashcroft: but I need to figure out Victoria's Secret

10:50Sarah Davidson: It's just opened in Victoria Centre. No way. A massive one. What, where the old Topshop used to be? No, it was where Super Dry used to be. No. Yeah, right there. Right there on the corner. I'm like dying to go. Get some bombshell spray.

11:05Sarah Ashcroft: I loved that bombshell perfume. That was so good.

11:09Sarah Davidson: I'm dying for my next trip to Nottingham so I can go to Victoria's Secret.

11:12Sarah Ashcroft: I need to find out what this blue form was called at school.

11:15Sarah Davidson: It will come to you. It's Mary or something.

11:17Sarah Ashcroft: I'm going to have to look through the Bible.

11:19Sarah Davidson: Yeah, yeah. literally

11:21Sarah Ashcroft: literally sorry that was a big old detour there of like Nottingham School Law

11:28Sarah Davidson: shout out to the Beckett Catholic School of Science specialising in science didn't they no technology specialising in technology what are you on about they specialise in something what yes the Beckett School specialising in science and technology I did not know that Yeah, that's why I had that big science. It was all science section. All those new science labs, you know? No. Yeah, specializing in science and technology. Wow. Yeah, clock it. Shout out. This is kind of sad for us, Sarah. I got scammed and lost 25K. Oh, my God. I'm sorry.

12:09Sarah Ashcroft: You've not told your friends?

12:12Sarah Davidson: I signed an NDA and slept with R. Celeb crush. Ooh. R? what was in us Harry Styles Justin Bieber Gerald Butler Austin Butler had a threesome with two colleagues from work nice had a sugar daddy nice you know if that worked if you can get into a good arrangement there yeah I wouldn't say no to that I did have someone

12:36Sarah Ashcroft: the other day DM me asking for a picture and I was like I'm not going to my feet

12:42Sarah Davidson: little does he know

12:43Sarah Ashcroft: I'm missing a toenail unfortunately yeah

12:44Sarah Davidson: right now you couldn't be they're not money but I was like

12:47Sarah Ashcroft: do you know what Like I would But like if you're actually Going to send me some cash Like Yeah Current account You know On the side And I remember

12:56Sarah Davidson: She went on a site And she went and met up With a sugar daddy Really Do you remember But she didn't like it She only met up with one guy I think I do remember that actually But it was one site I'm talking to a guy Who pays me to be super mean And makes me do Makes I'm talking to a guy Who pays me to be super mean And make him do gross things No one knows Look, if he's going to pay you, babes. Yeah, perks of the job. I applied for Big Brother. Nice. I applied for Dick and Dom's... In the bungalow. In the bungalow thing. I've not applied for anything. I think I should. I think you should. What should I apply for?

13:35Sarah Davidson: Mariana applied for traitors. Did she?

13:38Sarah Ashcroft: She'd be so good on that.

13:39Sarah Davidson: I don't think she actually did the video. She had to send in a video. She got halfway. She kept going. Send a video and she's like, oh, that's a bit much. Pee'd in our shared kitchen sink.

13:52Sarah Ashcroft: We could go on Traitors and pretend not to know each other. Yes. And form a little secret alliance. No, I think I could handle it. I mean, listen. As a traitor? Have you ever played Traitors like round the dining table?

14:07Sarah Davidson: No.

14:08Sarah Ashcroft: Oh my God. So we were playing it when we were skiing. I won as the faithful twice. Wow. but then i was a traitor and like i was straight twice i hated it it was so scary like it was like oh my god be cool be cool be cool like i'm having to say to you like i'm a facebook and like i found it so hard and i got caught as the traitor both times because like i do it wasn't easy and i was

14:33Sarah Davidson: like god imagine if we were actually on the show like this is tough because as soon as someone says

14:38Sarah Ashcroft: like it's you it's like oh no you're on to me you're on to me why would you think that susan yeah yeah i'm not sure if we could do it like i did prefer being the faithful really yeah and like genuinely it's harder to win as a faithful like we're not gonna get the 50k and you're gonna

14:54Sarah Davidson: get murdered straight away exactly like exactly you're not being able to control the game i do think it's easy with strangers though definitely if there was some twat who i didn't know being like you don't know me babe this is me i'm being real me and and you know me how yeah you don't know me baby yeah so i do think it'd be easier to um but our final one here is i slept with my best friend's brother that's unfortunate i mean if it works it's a beautiful arrangement yeah if it works out that is stunning but if it doesn't work yikes but i also think it's like just don't sleep with your best friends family members family members yeah you know in general

15:44Sarah Davidson: just before we get into it quick disclaimer just as we are not doctors we are not professionals we do not actually know what we are talking about light-hearted space okay don't take what we say

15:54Sarah Ashcroft: literally because we could be wrong yeah and if there's anything serious if there's anything you feel like you're seriously struggling with please contact a gp a professional because that is not us We're just girls, girls and boys just like you, you know?

16:05Sarah Davidson: We're just trying to get through life as well.

16:06Sarah Ashcroft: Non-professionals. Enjoy the episode. Enjoy.

16:11Sarah Davidson: Are we ready to dive into the first dilemma of the day? I am so ready. Cheers.

16:16Sarah Ashcroft: I'm caffeinated, I'm beverage. Cheers to you, doll. Cheers. Cheers. There we go.

16:25Sarah Davidson: Sorry. She was like, cheers.

16:28Sarah Ashcroft: Take a big sip.

16:34Sarah Davidson: cleanse the palate lubricate the vocal cords and let's dive in so ready so excited swallow it down swallow la la drink what a tune Jason Derulo Jason Derulo yeah well done I would actually say one of my favourite songs of all time all time Take me to the other side Jason Derulo I never thought it would be you And we were chilling Smiling in the photo booth And we got closer Yeah And you were eating off my spoon We're coming over Okay, let's stop That is one of our favorite songs And we were talking about your news Of all time We were like 16 and I will just get drunk. Disturb the peace. Find your hair all over me and then bite your lip.

17:39Sarah Davidson: Wow. Whisper and say,

17:42Sarah Ashcroft: we're going away. What did we think that meant? Yeah. You're 12 years old. What did we think that meant? We didn't know what that meant.

17:49Sarah Davidson: We're going to the other side. Sparks. What a song. Like, great song. That is one of my favorite songs of all time. Do you know what else is a really good Jay Cinderella song? We used to listen to that all the time. You also know Maroon 5 are headlining BST High Park in the summer. Low key, like we should attend.

18:07Sarah Ashcroft: I would love to go to that.

18:09Sarah Davidson: Only if they're going to play. Look, Adam Levine, we don't really support. However.

18:12Sarah Ashcroft: But the V album coming back for you. The V album.

18:16Sarah Davidson: The V album. That was so good. What a cultural shift in our lives. What a shift in our lives.

18:21Sarah Ashcroft: It was like. Don't you worry, girl. Yeah. What an album. That takes me back to the French exchange, being in that girl's blue shower, that was all the walls were blue in the bathroom. That's nice. Blasting that album.

18:34Sarah Davidson: What a time to be alive. What a time. But yeah, only if they're going to sing that V album, otherwise I'm not attending. Yeah, that's the only reason I'm there. You know, after he cheated on Behati. We don't support that, Adam. So, we're going to dive into the first dilemma, which is about a housemate. Have you heard of something called the housemate-mate-ic?

18:56Sarah Ashcroft: I can guess what it means. Yeah, me too. But I've not used the phrase myself.

19:00Sarah Davidson: Yeah, I've probably experienced it once or twice.

19:01Sarah Ashcroft: Yeah, I think I live with a girl once.

19:04Sarah Davidson: Definitely got something of that of the sort, isn't there? Boss Erra said here, the housemate ick is ruining my Australia experience. This is actually sad because I've moved all the way to Australia and you're pissing me off. And the only thing that's ruining my experience is my living situation and that involves you, Susan. Hi, girls. Love you both so much. My friend once served you in Gusto in West Bridgeford. Whoa! Nottingham Law. Nottingham Law. R.I.P. Gusto. Shut down now for a squiddling gig. What's it called? Quiggling Squid. I don't go to West Bridgeford. Squiggling gig. This giggling squid.

19:42Sarah Davidson: I avoid that place like the plague. West Bridge... Yeah, for understandable reasons. West Bridgeford is my stomping ground. Never used to be there.

19:51Sarah Ashcroft: Like that wasn't our ground. No, it wasn't our grounds.

19:53Sarah Davidson: No. But... I don't go that side of town. Since they've opened a Rudy's, yes. There's an amazing Oliver bonus there, yes. It's a lovely street. Great M &S.

20:04Sarah Ashcroft: But yeah, I'm not going there. There's no way.

20:05Sarah Davidson: Yeah, Gusto got closed down. I remember when we went to Gusto, first meal out after the first lockdown. Fucking hell. Remember? Me, you, Lydia, Olivia, first meal out after lockdown. Oh my God. Straight to Gusto. Let's live it up. Yeah, like we're out now. We're out. West Bridge for Gusto. We're free. Yeah. What a time. Yeah. Shout out. Shout out, Sarah. I'm in a lovely high street. I, look, since they opened Rudy's. Yeah. You've never even been Rudy's. I've been on tour in Sheffield. We had this conversation a few days ago. Oh, of course. We've had this conversation a few days ago, yeah. But you need to like go and sit in.

20:43Sarah Davidson: It's a lovely experience. I know, but I'm not going that side of town. No, of course not. I understand. Right. So. My friend, what serves you in Gusto at West Bridgeford? Lovely. From one fellow Yochi lover to another, I need help girls. Of course. We help our fellow Yochis. Okay.

21:00Sarah Ashcroft: Yochis.

21:01Sarah Davidson: Shout out. So I moved to Australia a year ago by myself. Wow. Jealous. And before I came, I joined a Facebook group and met five girls who were also moving over alone. Love that. This is just -

21:14Sarah Ashcroft: We should join this group.

21:15Sarah Davidson: In another life, I moved to Australia five years ago and left all this behind.

21:19Sarah Ashcroft: In another life, we went when we were 18 and we didn't come back. yeah wow if we went at 18 we would not have come back no or we would have come back like now but chances are we'd have found people out there we wouldn't come back

21:35Sarah Davidson: and then i would have gone and married at first sight australia when i was like 23

21:39Sarah Ashcroft: yeah and i could have been your agent yeah and then i would have met someone i think i'd be working at like i would have been australian royalty i think i'd be working at that gym Yeah, she'd be working at the beach house. Yeah, working at Beach House. Yeah. I'd be having Yochi dates.

21:55Sarah Davidson: Yes.

21:57Sarah Ashcroft: Yochi for dinner. I'd probably like get my heart broken outside pocket or something.

22:01Sarah Davidson: That's a canon event, but girl, that's what happens to us all.

22:06Sarah Ashcroft: Oh, I'd love it. Right. And I'd be doing that sunrise yoga on that mountain that we saw. Same.

22:13Sarah Davidson: I'd be up at 4am, yeah? I'd be asleep at 8.30. Whoa, bubble in my throat. Okay, so we met these five girls who were also moving over alone. This is great. That sounds like a perfect setup. We all became super close really quickly. And a few weeks in, I ended up moving in with one of them. Let's call her Susan. Suzanne. Because our leases ended at the same time, it all felt really convenient. And I've honestly been loving life here. But I can't ignore the constant ick anymore. I first got the ick pretty early on In my first week living with her She literally used my entire pack of pads And didn't replace them So when I came on my period I had nothing That is that That's brutal That's gonna wind you up A whole pack of pads Also in Australia That shit is like 40 fucking Australian dollars And you want pads Because there's no plastic on those tampons Oh my god yeah In Australia you gotta shove your whole finger up your vagina Just to put your tampon in So yeah yeah so she did replacement yeah so that's strike number one then it got worse when the four of us went traveling in a camper van for two weeks she had a cold and was leaving snotty tissues everywhere in this tiny van yeah that's unfortunate that would piss me off i just put them in the bin i understand having one floating tissue yeah that's like your tissue like yeah there's your tissue yeah but like dirty dirty tissues around around the tiny van yeah not okay like we were all having to clean them up ourselves it was grim yeah but the main thing is she just has zero original thoughts like we'll all be chatting and she'll repeat something one of us said 10 seconds earlier and slightly slightly reworded as if it's her own point and it happens constantly every couple of minutes it sounds minor but it actually drives you insane over time she also instantly changes her opinion depending on who she's talking to like if i try on a top and i don't and i didn't think i looked good in it she would tell me it looked nice and then i'd ask the other girls they would say it doesn't look the best and then she would also agree that it looks bad right okay so she's kind of just wanting to blend in yeah she she i feel like she admires you all and it's kind of like I want to be like these girls and yeah anyway she went home for a few weeks recently and me and the other girls let's call them Mary and Janet whoa enter Mary

24:49Sarah Ashcroft: and enter Janet stage left um Mary and Janet what's going on where's Sarah and Susan gone Mary second time mentioned second time mentioned we spoke about Mary earlier we did Mary the mother

25:01Sarah Davidson: of Jesus. So anyway, she went home for a few weeks and recently, a few weeks recently, and me and the other girls, Mary and Janet, realized how much lighter everything felt without her. Which sounds awful, but it's true. We all get along so well and when Susan's around, the vibe just drops. Now I feel like I have a full-on housemate ick. Everything she does irritates me and I can't switch it off. Me, Mary and Janet have all become really close and we've all said that when my lease is up in October we want to live together the three of us but here's the issue poor Susan sorry for Susan but here's the issue as I said earlier I currently live with Susan I feel so guilty because I would never want to make someone feel left out or like they're not wanted but at the same time living with her is genuinely making me unhappy and I'm no moving in with Mary and Janet would make the rest of my limited time in Australia so much better so girls what do I do how do I handle this without being a complete bitch or a people pleaser who ends up stuck living with her again.

26:02Sarah Davidson: I've attached pics of the below. Me, Mary, Janet, and then three of us with Susan.

26:09Sarah Ashcroft: Just take a minute to look at your sausage child.

26:14Sarah Davidson: You can't be there babe. Oh it's a little torso stretch.

26:26Sarah Davidson: she's like this she's got your eyes open

26:32just keep talking

26:34Sarah Davidson: right keep talking right this is Susan, Janet and Mary gorgeous girls gorgeous girls and then let's try and figure out who oh no no sorry This is our girl Janet and Mary. And then Susan. Janet and Mary, what a combo. Janet and Mary, how old are we? Are we 65 girls? Shout out Janet and Mary. Oh, here's Susan. Okay. Oh, gorgeous.

27:04Sarah Ashcroft: Oh, Susan's gorgeous. Right. I kind of feel sorry for Susan, but I know she's pissing you off.

27:10Sarah Davidson: Me too. Look, snotty tissues, not okay. Pad situation, not okay.

27:14Sarah Ashcroft: I think the thing about the pads is really annoying. and it would it would wind me up as well me too i have a feeling that maybe like you don't know what her previous living arrangement was like she could have lived with like one of her best mates before and it wasn't that deep they always used each other's shit and like she's kind of been used to living with people who like it doesn't really matter if you use their stuff yes and then she's moved in with strangers and she's thought oh i really like these girls i'm getting on really well like it's okay like what's mine is yours type of vibe and you are very much like no no no

27:51Sarah Davidson: don't touch my shit it's kind of giving that susan doesn't have sisters in a way oh i thought

27:58Sarah Ashcroft: it was giving that she does have sisters oh and she's just take take take yeah like share share share like what's mine is yours you can take mine like maybe yeah you could look at it either way she does have sisters or she doesn't wow great thoughts really really philosophical

28:17Sarah Davidson: um okay yeah i do feel bad for susan but if she's genuinely making your life a misery you just need to tread carefully and because obviously you were all met on the same time

28:32Sarah Ashcroft: it doesn't sound like she's mean-spirited yes it doesn't sound like she's out to get you by any

28:38Sarah Davidson: means she sounds very sweet and lovely and like it literally sounds like she admires the three of you and just wants to fit in and like and i also wouldn't be surprised if susan herself is aware that like i'm not a glue in this group yeah like i can see and feel that like these three are all

28:57Sarah Ashcroft: closer than i am with any of them so she just wants to be liked i think and she just wants to like fit in with you guys and to have that relationship and in her mind by agreeing with

29:08Sarah Davidson: like yeah mary mary me too janet same janet yes actually yeah i don't like that top yeah janet what janet just wants to blend in she is literally just trying to fit in and like make you guys like she's just trying to be likable but obviously she doesn't realize that actually susan we'd rather you just completely be authentic and yourself and like we would appreciate like the honesty and authenticity a bit more yeah then like just following what we're doing but obviously she she doesn't see it like that she's thinking no i have to be just like these girls like i have to think just like them so i don't know is there a way we can give her a second time a chance i think

29:47Sarah Ashcroft: we should give her a second chance like i kind of feel like we're holding this like like at the end

29:52Sarah Davidson: of the day also like she's a good she's gonna be a girl alone in australia if you guys just like fuck off and abandon her but i do understand what you're saying like she is making it's it's like because telling you to stay with your boyfriend.

30:02Sarah Ashcroft: I feel like you've got to the point now where like she can do no right. Whatever she does is pissing you off. Like even with this whole thing about she just agrees with everyone. Like, well, that's okay. She agrees with everyone. Same. Same. Yeah, totally superior. Same. Same. But obviously like you're so clocked on to every single thing she does. Like I fear that Susan can do no right in your head. Yeah. So. And look, the snotty tissues, I actually understand.

30:28Sarah Davidson: I do, but also like, okay. yeah like as long as it wasn't like diarrhea fucking splattered all over your tiny little

30:34Sarah Ashcroft: yeah but i would be inclined if you can to give susan a fresh chance a fresh start like make her feel confident like go out for coffee just you two like not with the other two like try and give susan a fresh start because there are worse housemates to have there are people who are stealing shit there are people who are trying to sleep with your boyfriend there are people who are being mean to you who are being catty like she does sound quite agreeable like overall and maybe she's just and maybe just like find her feet in another instance where she

31:11Sarah Davidson: maybe uses your your pads just say oh can you where are my pads gone can you back like just say it be direct can you buy me some more pads yeah and then maybe she's like oh shit yeah i

31:21Sarah Ashcroft: can't actually like maybe it was a total accident where like she needed some she used them and then she completely forgot like sometimes you just forget yeah maybe she just completely forgot yeah to restock yeah but also maybe just to you know just to look on another angle maybe it would help

31:43Sarah Davidson: your guys's relationship if you didn't live with susan because sometimes you can't live with a certain friend it's like look we're great friends but living together but we're not compatible under the same roof so maybe like when the lease is up maybe you could help her find another flatmate or don't just leave her high and dry like she's alone in australia all four of you like came alone in the same circumstances and maybe just be honest with her and say i don't think living with you is suitable for us anymore but like you're still a great friend of mine i'm gonna help you find a flat this will help our relationship you don't get on like if you

32:20Sarah Ashcroft: never lived together your pads wouldn't be stolen exactly and you wouldn't be annoyed about the

32:23Sarah Davidson: tissues yes everything would really be like yes so maybe it will help your relationship when if you do move out and she moves in with other people but don't don't just like i would be inclined to try and give it a fresh start me too when she gets back because she said it sounds like you you guys are her only friends in australia you know like she's just kind of relying on you guys because we were all in the same boat and i feel like it's a common theme that like us three

32:52Sarah Ashcroft: kind of like hate on susan and we've decided that we don't like susan but maybe let's try and like switch the narrative and be like you know what she's actually all right like we've just i think we've been making like she's nice in my head yeah like let's actually just give her another another

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34:32Sarah Davidson: You feel it taking over you

34:40Okay.

34:41Sarah Ashcroft: Number two. Numero dos. Help. Help. Mother-in-law banned me from their house. Get them banned. Get them banned. We don't do that here. Get them banned. Hey girls, I love the pod. It's been my comfort show to listen to each week for you. whoa thank you sarah you both give such great advice we truly sarah i never thought i'd be writing in but the last two months have been wild me and my boyfriend this is one to like ask our

35:14Sarah Davidson: mums about yeah it's a good point actually on what reason in what world would you ban a boyfriend from the house who one of your daughters is still with and happy with like what why like why because I feel like my mum would still want to have at least him under the roof so she could at least observe and just like have eyes on you know me and my boyfriend have been together for four years

35:42Sarah Ashcroft: I'm 22 he is 21 we met in our hometown but for the majority of our relationship we have done long distance as I moved to uni at 18 and then moved to London to do my master's this year He stayed at home as his job is based there I've always gotten along really well with his family Specifically his mum Who I'll call Susan She has always been so welcoming to me And they even invited me on holiday with them Six months into our relationship What have you done? What's changed? Since then That was when you were like 18

36:18Sarah Davidson: You've known me since I was a teenager

36:20Sarah Ashcroft: You've watched me come into my young adulthood since then whenever i am back visiting him or home for the summer they have always included me as if i was one of their own would always go out for drinks watch films together go away on trips they've even invited me over when he's been away on holiday with his friends wow and helped me move into some of my uni houses over the years wow wow this is like your second family his mum honestly felt like a second mum to me she would always let me open up to her and share if i'm struggling and vice versa. Susan would often refer to me as the daughter she never had as my boyfriend only has a brother and she would say how nice it is to be so close to another girl as she only grew up with brothers and has only ever had close male friends.

37:03Sarah Davidson: Well yeah but this is beautiful that's where it can all go wrong because she's not used to having women around but she's brought you in. She's invited you with open arms. Yeah but then obviously one thing switches and she's like she can't handle women i don't i don't know i never had a reason to doubt susan until brian's

37:21Sarah Ashcroft: 21st birthday last may so almost a year ago brian called me one day and said that his mum had told him to tell me that this year they wanted to just have the four of them go out for brian's birthday as since i'd come along they haven't been able to do that okay right okay this hurt me as i had gone to every single family birthday dinner since I've been with Brian and surely now we've been together for four years like I'm a part of the family especially when they've always referred

37:48Sarah Davidson: to me yeah like couples come as one like at that point yeah you know I asked Brian if he wanted me

37:54Sarah Ashcroft: there and he said yeah I do but mum's made up her mind also like it's your Brian's birthday yeah like Brian who do you who do you want my babes who do you want to see these on who do you want at gusto a few weeks went by and i came around to visit brian and his dad apologized to me and said they didn't think about what they did and that he was the one who booked the dinner

38:17Sarah Davidson: and i am welcome to come okay so the dad's kind of like oh of course you're like sorry i didn't

38:23Sarah Ashcroft: think about it all right the whole time susan didn't say anything or make eye contact with me and it seemed as though she didn't like that i was now being invited also brian told me that Susan was the one who booked it as she takes care of all of those kind of things. Something has happened. And Brian's dad doesn't agree with it. Because you've come into the house. Brian's dad says, oh, sorry, darling. That was me who booked that. I got it wrong. Of course you can come. And then Brian's gone. Dad didn't book it. Mum did.

38:56Sarah Davidson: So what is her problem then?

38:58Sarah Ashcroft: So I didn't really believe them. I ended up going and it was very awkward. the whole time I could not stop thinking about the fact they didn't actually want me there and the dynamic felt very off compared to usual however since they then took me away with them in the summer and we were back to doing usual activities together things gradually felt back to normal okay that was until valentine's weekend this year I was so you had a weird blip last May like that was a weird time that was like what's happened here this feels a bit strange it was

39:30Sarah Davidson: like the first time you'd seen her in a different light and a different attitude from her questioned

39:35Sarah Ashcroft: like oh why do you not like me like i'm kind of i'm on the i feel like i'm on the back foot things have changed but then you weren't on holiday that summer things fell back to normal and we kind of went past it but then valentine's day i was back but she wants to spend valentine's day with her fucking son just the two of them yeah i was back visiting brian for valentine's and was staying over at his for a few nights when i arrived things fell off i hadn't seen them in a month neither of his parents asked how I'd been how my course was going how my family was also my dad was a bit unwell at the moment and still like nothing this was strange as they usually do you know I tried to engage in conversation with them but I felt really difficult to get anything out of them so now the dad's gone cold yeah so the mum has infiltrated the dad yeah over the weekend me and Brian weren't around loads as had stuff planned for valentines however when we did see them the conversation was kept a small talk and i would try and bring things up only to get one word answers back like babe we've been on holiday together like it's been four years like what's going on brian's brother had his girlfriend over too and susan was chatting away with her all night i asked brian later that night if everything was okay with his parents as they seemed very different for me but he said that everything was fine after the weekend i went back to london and then two days later brian text me saying can we talk

40:58Sarah Davidson: oh it's like i knew something was going on like come on like i'm not stupid i didn't think much

41:05Sarah Ashcroft: of it as we often call in the evening however when he called me also he didn't have to say can we talk no that's alarming his he told me his parents spoke to him after i left that weekend and told him that he has to go around to my house from now on as I am no longer welcome.

41:26Sarah Davidson: What the hell?

41:27Sarah Ashcroft: And what is it that you think I've done here? I was stunned. I was trying to rack my brain for anything I had done, but I could not think of anything that resulted in a ban.

41:39Sarah Davidson: But also like, Brian, stand up for me.

41:40Sarah Ashcroft: Right.

41:41Sarah Davidson: Like, what's happened? I need answers. Like, let's fix this. Don't just accept, oh yeah, my girlfriend's banned. No. Don't just accept that. Like you're a 21 year old man. You're a grown man. You're a grown up. You can say, whoa, whoa, whoa. What's going on here?

41:54Sarah Ashcroft: Like Brian has said that for the last six months, they have noticed a huge shift in my personality and that I was no longer the chatty, bubbly girl I once was. And instead, I was rude and disrespectful. He said that apparently this was down to me not saying good morning and good evening as much and forgetting to say thank you for my dinner.

42:19Sarah Davidson: Oh, okay.

42:20Sarah Ashcroft: He also said they were upset they had not received Christmas presents this year. Okay. Listen, actually, it's fair. This also hurt me as they were aware of my financial situation since moving to London. And I told him this year I was really going to struggle. Every single year I have bought them all birthday and Christmas presents and tried so hard, even though I'm a student.

42:43Sarah Davidson: also my parents have no reason to ban me no from the house over a christmas present you've been

42:50Sarah Ashcroft: dead serious and a thank you and a good morning like i'm 20 right i'm 21 i'm 22 she's 22 i'm 22 like i've been here for four years like i'm an adult you know i'm grateful like an adult yeah also like i'd like to think you know my character enough to know that if i didn't say thank you for dinner like a few times it wasn't because I wasn't like your lasagna was was great it's been great

43:16Sarah Davidson: for four years your bechamel sauce is nice lovely I've told you that before I'm just a student I've

43:22Sarah Ashcroft: got a lot going on my head's busy like I feel at home here like if anything yeah like it's a compliment like I feel so at home here and so relaxed around all of you that I'm not on my best behavior with my manners because I'm not I don't feel like a stranger you know when you go to someone's house for the first time it's like thank you so much that was lovely thank you so like i'm sure can i help out like and i'm not saying that you then become disrespectful but the longer you're there like the more you settle in like well this is like my house now i'm chilling

43:51Sarah Davidson: like on the point that you said i've changed of course i've changed i'm not 18 anymore i'm 22 i'm living in london i'm growing up my frontal lobe is coming in in three years

44:03Sarah Ashcroft: like what do you mean but interesting i'm glad that you've like also like just chat to me just

44:09Sarah Davidson: say like oh you didn't say thank you for dinner like like are you okay is everything okay we can talk yeah like you don't have to then just be cold with me and then ban me from the house it's

44:19Sarah Ashcroft: really bizarre my parents have never expected anything from him even though he works full time and always told him you know save your money don't spend it on us we don't need gifts i asked him if He thought I changed and he said no, apart from last weekend. But he understood that things were off. I was hurt that Brian hadn't stood up for me more. And instead he was being the middleman, relaying information between us both. I told him I would never let my parents ban him from the house and wouldn't even let it get to that point where we're having this conversation. He said he felt like he had to hear them out as they were his parents, but he knows my character.

44:55Sarah Ashcroft: I would never intentionally be rude or disrespectful. so I decided to text Susan nice I spent hours carefully putting together a respectful but firm text to her because also just side point it's really disappointing if our future kids let's say we have all these boys and one of their girlfriends is a little bit like quiet a bit different after four years I would think something was wrong and you are going to go like is everything alright baby?

45:26Sarah Davidson: Also, our Sarah just said that her dad's been ill.

45:30Sarah Ashcroft: Yeah. Give me a break for a second. My mind is also elsewhere. Like not to like, you think after four years, you would like pull me for a, should we go and get a coffee? Pulls like Susan, you're a 60 year old woman.

45:42Sarah Davidson: Like, you know what it's like to be a young girl?

45:43Sarah Ashcroft: Like, help me out.

45:44Sarah Davidson: You can talk to me. Yeah. Like you can make, like. I'm not the enemy. You have to ban me from the house. You can comment on the Christmas presents if you want. Yeah. Like I will, then we can have a conversation about it.

45:55Sarah Ashcroft: like you can speak to me like i'm an adult yeah so i text susan um i explained that my masters had been a lot more full-on and stressful than my undergrad and my dad has been unwell as as she knows so maybe this is why i've been less sociable and a bit more within myself and if they thought i was different why didn't they just ask me if i was okay rather than banning me exactly also she did actually set the tone in her house yeah you you were trying i got back the most defensive rude text again i was shocked this was not the same woman who'd been around me for the past four years it really upset me brian said his mum wouldn't mean it in that way but everyone i showed it to including my parents couldn't believe a grown woman was speaking to me like this we need to see the text i decided that i didn't want to go back and forth over text and seeing as i wasn't allowed back around their house the next the next best thing to do was give her a call god good for you guys.

46:50Sarah Davidson: Sarah you're stressing me out. The last thing I would do was call someone when I'm in

46:53Sarah Ashcroft: conflict. Brian came to mind to support me and I outlined everything to her that has upset me. To my surprise on the phone she was a lot more apologetic. I bet she was yeah because she's not hiding behind the screen now. But still stayed firm in her decision and could not see my side completely. I think she was probably shocked that you had the balls to call her out and be like hello. We ended the call by her saying it's best I don't come around for a while and me saying that I wouldn't want to anyway. And I doubt I would ever feel fully comfortable in their home again, which is so sad after all the things we did for the past four years.

47:28Sarah Ashcroft: Brian says he agrees with everything I've said and that it's harsh from their side. I just wished he had said this sooner and stepped up. So girls, what am I supposed to do? Me and Brian would not be moving out for at least a couple of years or we tried to save up. I don't think I could go around to his house for two years as that's such a long amount of time. I just don't understand why they have switched up on me and been so harsh in their decision. But why after four years of them treating me like their own? The only thing I can think of is that when we got together, we were both young and maybe she didn't think we would last.

47:59Sarah Ashcroft: But now we have, she's realising that she is losing her son and doesn't want to let him go. Do you know what? That's a very interesting analysis I hadn't thought of. She had always made it very clear that she would be heartbroken if he moved out. Here we go. And me and Brian have spoken about a house, but this wouldn't be for another good few years. Like we need to save up. Like I'm still at uni, babe. Side note, I once noticed that she reposted a post on Facebook about mums and their sons with the post saying, I used to be the one that he gave cuddles, but now he gives it to another girl. And I used to be the one to give him a kiss before bed.

48:34Sarah Ashcroft: But now another girl does that.

48:39Sarah Ashcroft: Are you all right? So is she trying to get rid of me? I do not want sons. She has previously opened up to me about Brian's brother's relationships and how she hopes they would come to an end. Okay. And now, it feels like she's doing this with me.

48:58Sarah Davidson: Well, this has changed everything. Yeah.

49:00Sarah Ashcroft: Wow. This is the family.

49:02Sarah Davidson: That is mental.

49:04Sarah Ashcroft: I mean, it's a very blurry image, but it's like a happy family.

49:07Sarah Davidson: Where's the mother?

49:09Sarah Ashcroft: This is Sarah. Sarah's beautiful.

49:10Sarah Davidson: Wow, Sarah.

49:11Sarah Ashcroft: you are stunning yeah that last paragraph told us everything we needed to know that i think you've hit the nail on the head at first you were just like maybe the first girlfriend it was a bit exciting it was like oh my son's like 18 like he's bringing his girlfriend around like i've got this daughter now like it's really cute but now as the years have gone on it's got more serious and for some reason she is now backpedaling thinking oh my god you're now gonna take well she's thinking

49:39Sarah Davidson: next steps are okay he's gonna move to london a house he's actually gonna move out of my home

49:45Sarah Ashcroft: girlfriend he'll stay at home for longer because he needs to share a deposit with someone like it's gonna take him like she's almost holding him back the joke's on her because she thinks

49:54Sarah Davidson: oh i'm gonna say you've been she's been really rude and cold and that she's changed and my son's gonna listen to that and he's gonna believe me and then he's not gonna want to be with her anymore like it's all her way of thinking like she's gonna try and put her son off you dad on her side i don't know i think the dad is just going along with his wife to make his own life easier he's just being agreeable with her obviously she's going through it this is her baby son who's like talking about moving out yes actually growing up like you know and it's interesting that you know

50:25Sarah Ashcroft: she said like i hope it doesn't work out with the other girlfriends about his siblings

50:29Sarah Davidson: that has told us everything we need to know yeah she's going through something herself she's scared of losing her sons to other women which is just but they're also like mental the

50:41Sarah Ashcroft: most frustrating thing here is the only way you're gonna lose him is by pushing me away like i would come around to your house every weekend and then the sun is in your house space for me this is a lovely place like we would we want to live close to you like we want to see you every weekend we want this we want that we go on holiday together like now well you are gonna lose your son because i'm not hanging out with you you've banned me from the house i'm assuming i'm not coming on these holidays anymore we're not going to be having christmas at yours like he's going to be leaning more into my world and my family because you've pushed me out but in her

51:14Sarah Davidson: mind doing everything yeah the wrong way like but she thinks oh this is my master plan like she's deluded she thinks she can break you up she thinks she can break you up because well i'm his mother that I'm his first love, like he'll listen to me. Like that's how she's thinking. She's thinking, okay, well, my first step is ban her from the house. Yeah, get her gone. Get her gone. But like, we're just going to find another way to see each other. We're just going to hang out in mine. It's not going to break us up. I think she's hoping it will. It's actually going to bring us closer in conflict because like I'm leaning on your son more for like help emotionally because this is crazy.

51:49Sarah Davidson: She's got it all wrong. Well, like you said, she's going to be the one who's going to be left out for everything. it's only gonna get even worse.

51:54Sarah Ashcroft: It's making a rod for her own back. Like that's all that's happening here.

51:58Sarah Davidson: I can't believe that actually happens. Me neither. I can't believe. And that repose told us everything. She's jealous of you. She wants to be in bed with her son, cuddling him. She wants to be changing his nappy again. Like she wants to be dressing him in the morning.

52:11Sarah Ashcroft: But at the start, it was so like, I've always wanted a daughter. Like I'm so happy we can do things together. Like I'm so happy to have a nice bond with you. But then reality set in.

52:21Sarah Davidson: Like, oh, they're actually going to move out of this house and into another house i just don't get that i

52:26Sarah Ashcroft: don't get it like do you not want the best for your son you should be happy you should be happy i'm a nice girl like i just don't understand the best girl your son could find like he could do a

52:36Sarah Davidson: lot worse yeah but obviously i'm really sorry about that sarah but like it's not a you problem

52:41Sarah Ashcroft: i do think like brian his 20 is 21 years old and i do think that he should have stood up for you more in that house and should have been like dad talk to mom she's fucking lost the plot like what's going on there like and chat and even his siblings like i think he should have been able to stand up

52:58Sarah Davidson: for you a little bit more i don't think he can stand and be like mom you're being ridiculous

53:01Sarah Ashcroft: like what's actually going on because there's nothing wrong with her and we all know it's

53:04Sarah Davidson: probably scared of his mom though and feels like he can't stand up but it's like yeah but i also

53:08Sarah Ashcroft: think like i think also she hopefully respects the fact that you gave her a phone call i think so and like went straight to her like what's going on and I also think like if we're gonna get back to being like a happy family down the line Brian's gonna have a lot to do with it like Brian really needs to start like fighting for you I think and telling his mum like what's the problem

53:31Sarah Davidson: it's on her to reach out to you I think you've said your piece she knows that you can sleep at night you know yeah like you have the upper hand I think she's the one who has to mend this and Brian needs to get in there and like give his mum a talking to I think. Agreed. And say like you're being ridiculous. Yeah. Like if this is your master plan to try and break us up or whatever. You're only making it worse for yourself. You're gonna make it worse. You're pushing me away. Yeah because when Susan has kids in a year or so. She's actually pregnant. Yeah. We're not gonna be bringing them around to your house because we've been banned.

54:02Sarah Davidson: You're not gonna be the favorite granny. You've literally banned us from this house.

54:05Sarah Ashcroft: Yeah so soon.

54:06Sarah Davidson: So like we're gonna be taking them to the other grandparents. Yeah. That's mental. Good luck Sarah.

54:21Sarah Davidson: okay we've actually never had a situation where we've had a friend give an ultimatum i don't think we have either so here are sarah saying is my best friend giving me an ultimatum this is interesting hello ladies absolutely adore listening to the pod each week and really take some valuable life lessons from you both so thank you wow thank you sarah i've got a really sticky girl talk dilemma that i really need your help with why is navigating friendships in your 20s so hard so me and my bestie susan have been inseparable since college she's like a sister sister to me and we've always had such a special bond we're always going the extra mile for each other going on holidays with our partners gym classes etc you name it we're almost 30 the era of it ladies lovely the era of settling down and marriage etc and this is where the issue starts okay so also sarah's given our susan's given our sarah an ultimatum what's the ultimatum me and susan were friends with another girl let's call her stacy for the past five years We used to be much closer with Stacey Going on trips and regular dinners And nights out The three of us had a lot of fun Stacey and her partner moved across the state A couple of years ago And we seemed to lose touch with her Okay Okay Which is sad but you know life happens We would still speak on occasion And see Stacey when she came back Once or twice a year Okay so Stacey's moved out

55:53Sarah Ashcroft: She's not really in the fold But you know

55:54Sarah Davidson: Not regularly but you know We're friends We love Stacey still Susan however began to dislike Stacey More so her partner too She didn't like their values and attitude Which I completely respect And she's allowed to have her opinion This tension seemed to continue And I assumed Stacey picked up on this vibe As she would not reply to Susan's messages Okay so these two have got beef now Just to be clear No drama has happened And no words exchanged between the pair Just all unspoken vibes the problem comes as stacy is now getting married and in and invited us both on her bachelorette me and stacy have never had an issue so i thought so i feel obliged to go or at least make an effort for part of the bachelorette where i can i accept that me and stacy don't see each other as much now she moved away but we were once good friends and i'm gonna be a guest at her wedding after all Susan on the other hand is not happy I've agreed to go on this bachelorette trip she is frustrated as she thinks I don't have her back in this situation but we don't have any direct beef.

57:05Sarah Davidson: Nothing's happened Stacy's not done anything to you she just doesn't like her vibe and attitude you just disagree with some of her morals right now okay so she's frustrated as she thinks I don't have her back in this situation and can't understand my reasoning for going when I'm not close to Stacey anymore. She states how much Stacey and said partner have upset her in the past by being rude and thinks that that should be enough for me not to go. Okay. Okay. So she's like, look, Stacey and her partner are rude. How dare you? You're going to go on this bachelorette trip. Like, don't support her.

57:41Sarah Davidson: I'm struggling because nothing has ever been said between Susan and Stacey. There's been no argument. stacy has ignored some of susan's messages and likewise susan has probably done the same back but they've never addressed the issue so if i didn't go on stacy's batch i'd have to make up some lie and i couldn't write out say to stacy look i'm having to have susan's back and i don't feel it's right to go because stacy doesn't even know susan dislikes her right stacy also like

58:10Sarah Ashcroft: didn't stacy invite susan on the batch like she invited yes i believe so so stacy doesn't think

58:14Sarah Davidson: as a problem yeah i explained to susan that if a nasty argument happened or someone was out of order i'll always have her back and value her friendship so much more but nothing has been said and it's not my place to say so girls am i doing the right thing going on this trip for stacy or should i back or should i sack the batch off potentially causing something between me and stacy but saving my friendship with susan it feels like our friendship can't move past this or should I be able to go on the batch and do what I feel is right for me? Sincerely, Asad Sarah. I think you can go on the batch.

58:52Sarah Davidson: So do I. I think we just got to say to Susan.

58:58Sarah Ashcroft: I think unfortunately, like what I understand Susan being like, you should have my back, you know, your best friend, like you don't like the people that I don't like. Like we're on the same team here. like if i hate them you hate them i get that completely that whole like vibe which is like yeah fair but in this instance like we were somewhat of a trio nothing's happened and the

59:22Sarah Davidson: only thing that's happened is stacy's moved away so that's the only reason why we've got a bit of distance but really if she was still here we would still probably well we might not be but we would still be this trio and we were all like equal parts in this trio yeah do you know what i mean and she's moved away but my relationship still stood with Stacey as did yours obviously you guys have now got a bit of friction but last time I checked with Stacey we were good mates you're invited on the hand we can go together and you were invited you've just kind of got some new

59:52Sarah Ashcroft: ideas about her that you don't like yeah so I do think it's slightly unfair for Susan to like like Susan could have said to you like look you know I feel about Stacey like I'm not gonna go but like i get it like yeah like don't ruin your relationship with her if you you know yeah but what that says to me is that like susan is just doesn't it's insecure in her friendships like she's not

1:00:16Sarah Davidson: confident in her friendships but also what she thinks gonna happen stacy's moved across like we don't see like she's far away it's not like i'm gonna leave you for her she doesn't live here

1:00:27Sarah Ashcroft: anymore maybe it sounds like our sarah's the glue here within this trio yes probably susan doesn't Susan wants you all to herself, you know? And she's like, no, like, we don't like Stacey, remember? Like, we've pushed Stacey out.

1:00:39Sarah Davidson: But, like, I can go away for three nights. Like, also, I do have my own life. Like, if I still deem her as a valuable friend to me, then that's it. She's done nothing to me. And she's seemingly done nothing to you.

1:00:52Sarah Ashcroft: I know. I would just maybe say to Susan, like, look, Susan, I love you. I love our friendship. You are irreplaceable, you know? Yes. and I would just say like look I've thought a lot about it I understand where you're coming from I know you know Stacey's upset you I validate her I know Stacey has upset you in the past but I hope you can see from my position like I still have a friendship with Stacey I don't want to decline her invitation to go on her batch because like I'm gonna go to her wedding because

1:01:21Sarah Davidson: I don't want to lose her friendship completely because if I do that we I will lose her friendship completely yeah i have no grounds to not yes yes but then obviously susan thinks you do

1:01:33Sarah Ashcroft: but but that's where susan needs to just like be slightly more like bird's eye view yes and be like this isn't about me like i appreciate like i appreciate like kind of below the radar she's pissed me off a little bit but i don't have the right to then say that no one else can be friends

1:01:48Sarah Davidson: with her because fair enough if stacy did something directly to susan and you witnessed it and you well well out of order how dare you know whatever then fair be like well i don't support you anymore either i'm not going to come to your back like fair enough but this is just susan all of a sudden taking a disliking to stacy yeah and you can't like you're kind of in the middle like but i still like stacy and she's not done anything to you and stacy's invited you both yeah so i don't think she's getting married it's kind of fun either i think you're okay to go me too and i

1:02:20Sarah Ashcroft: Say exactly what Sophia said. Validate her first.

1:02:23Sarah Davidson: Say, look, I understand how you feel. I support you. However, Stacey and me, nothing's happened here.

1:02:30Sarah Ashcroft: What reason do I have not to go?

1:02:32Sarah Davidson: And look, I will go and I'll see how she is. Maybe she'll be a bit weird with me and be a bit rude. Then I understand. But I've not seen her in six months. We've been invited. Good luck. We'll enjoy the batch. Enjoy the batch. Maybe we'll go into Vegas or something. It sounds like we're in America. Or like Mexico. We don't call them bachelorette, do we? No, we call hen do. Hen do, of course. We don't say badge.

1:02:55Sarah Ashcroft: Right, should we have a star of the week? I believe so, Sophia. Okay, hello girls. I would love to nominate my Brian for star of the week. We have been together for three years and even though we're long distance, he always makes the effort to travel and come and see me. I'm an occupational therapy student and I've just finished a 10-week placement on a neurological rehab ward. It was a lot at times for me, but I loved it. He knew exactly how much I've been putting into it so he secretly booked us a holiday to Tenerife for when I finished. Wow. Just so I had something to look forward to. He is genuinely my biggest supporter.

1:03:31Sarah Ashcroft: Picks attached. We love this Brian. Thank you to his sister, my bestie, for putting me onto the pod. We have no names. We're anonymous but lovely couple. Thank you Sarah. Thank you Brian. We love a surprise holiday. Wow. We love a surprise trip. enjoy Tenerife you guys you crazy kids right thank you so much for listening to this week's Girl Talk we'll see you next Wednesday as always if you have an email, a dilemma or a star of the week submission you can email them to hello at thegirlsbathroom.com

1:04:04Sarah Davidson: or you can follow us on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok thank you see you on Wednesday bye bye

1:04:19Sarah Davidson: Thumbtack presents Tile Trouble. Every single time I use my sink, I make eye contact with the uneven grout of my kitchen backsplash. The crooked corners eye me and I'm haunted by more tiling questions than I thought possible.

1:04:32Sarah Ashcroft: What kind of pro can fix a backsplash? Can I replace one cracked tile or should I replace them all? What? What if I just use Thumbtack? I can hire top-rated pros, read reviews, and compare prices with a tap. All on the app. Thumbtack knows homes. Download the app today. while every other channel is fighting for your customers attention podcasts are where they've already given it no one accidentally listens to a podcast for 45 minutes they choose to be here they trust the voice in their ears and when that voice talks about your brand it doesn't sound like advertising it sounds like a recommendation from a friend a cast gives you that trust at scale digital precision post-read authenticity and performance data that proves it worked Don't fight for attention.

1:05:15Sarah Ashcroft: Buy it with Acast. Learn more by visiting acast.com slash advertise.