Girl Talk: Is my mum sabotaging my proposal?!

0:10Catherine Bohart: Still got that little... Still got that tickle. Oh, it's looming. Just a slight one.

0:16Sophia Hagen: I mean, touch wood, I have really steered clear of any sort of cough, cold... It's good. It's best we don't have any sort of physical interaction, myself and you. Yeah. Well, we often steer clear, don't we? There's a physical boundary between us that we don't like to cross.

0:35Catherine Bohart: There's generally one meter between us at all times, which is the way I like it.

0:38Sophia Hagen: Although your mum actually at the weekend sent me a picture of...

0:42Catherine Bohart: Yeah, did you get all the pictures she was sending?

0:43Sophia Hagen: Yeah, I got a few.

0:44Catherine Bohart: Really fun. Mum's been going through all these old photos.

0:48Sophia Hagen: And did you notice we were touching arms. Yeah, you actually were touching me, which is really rogue. We were literally touching arms. And I was like, oh my God, we're like low-key touching this. We'll put the picture in here. Yeah.

0:59Catherine Bohart: but that was so we were 16 in that image 16 yeah because i got we look old not gonna lie

1:05Sophia Hagen: yeah because i got confused that was like because i said to your mom like oh 10 years ago and then i thought actually no that's more than 10 years ago it's 12 because we had two proms is end of year 11 you're 16 which is that one yes i mean still stand by the dresses stand by it and we

1:20Catherine Bohart: always we always said that when we always said when we bought them when we were 16 we'll always

1:27Sophia Hagen: stand by these black black simple we did say that classic we will always stand by these i had the natural kills but i had two bits and a bun we both had low buns i think with the bits out at the front and then lydia says she remembers when you picked the orange lip sofia went rogue with an orange

1:44Catherine Bohart: lip oh don't i don't remember making that choice he said i remember that i remember the decision

1:48Sophia Hagen: on the orange lip yeah i stand by it it's a nice pop support yeah it's a kylie jenna lip

1:55Catherine Bohart: kit era with the mat it was with the mat we weren't gloss gloss wasn't like we weren't in the

2:00Sophia Hagen: gloss era no gloss definitely not definitely no blush definitely and it was no highlight and we always stood by the choice and we look back now i think yeah i'd wear that dress today

2:11Catherine Bohart: great dress yeah like i'm happy to share that image yeah and support the decisions we made at the time yeah you know because not to speak on others but some people probably regret their prom dressers some people probably you know the colors you know we're trying to the colors the hair you know but to be fair a red would have been nice red's always timeless and a classic i mean i'll

2:31Sophia Hagen: never forget the two girls that wore the same dress and they hated each other those two girls

2:35Catherine Bohart: because we were like debonings dress we were like coast it might have even been oh was it no no it was ted baker was it that is factual it was ted baker that's a fact remember it's ted

2:49Sophia Hagen: baker that is factual it was those two oh i didn't remember the specifics each other and i was like come on get a picture together lean in own it there's no point it sounds like we've all seen it like this is the gossip of the evening girls like you two yeah like people made a facebook page so you put in what dress you were wearing so no one would copy and wear the same yeah just

3:11Catherine Bohart: we didn't contribute to that what where was my dress from yours was so lace london was it yeah and then my colots my white colots shout out colots shout out colots i love colots for

3:24Sophia Hagen: year 12 colots don't own a pair but love colots i would do a clock yeah well it's essentially

3:29Catherine Bohart: it's because i remember i remember it's a capri but why yeah i remember uh revolutionary for the year 13 prom we were thinking about wearing 13 oh my god i didn't realize yeah the car i thought year 12 was the cutoff no of course it's year 13 i'm getting all confused um i remember we were thinking about doing a suit courtney k style because courtney k on the record i wouldn't i would have looked questionable yeah like suits and we were gonna do it and that's why that's where the collots came from obviously we had our fashion blog so we were trying to be gonna push the button fashion forward and just show everyone you know we take fashion risks and they obviously always work you know because you know i'm a lady in a suit and i'm 18 and it's amazing you know so

4:14Sophia Hagen: but yeah what did you wear I wore Maddie Corker shout out a white dress nice the plunge white yes of course yeah that was Maddie Corker because I couldn't find anything so my mum reached out to the fellow mums I questioned my look no I loved your look really and also we rocked it together oh no it was mint green

4:30Catherine Bohart: was it not

4:31Sophia Hagen: yeah it was pistachio pistachio crochet you had the pistachio in white and then I had the white dress pistachio crochet

4:36Catherine Bohart: and we wore those

4:37Sophia Hagen: fake stellar heels were they real Steve Madden Steve Madden

4:40Catherine Bohart: we wore Steve Madden heels that saw on Pinterest dress where's my dog blueberry she's pissing around blueberry i see you come back around here where we can all see you there's five of us in this room no one's got eyes on you right now

4:52Sophia Hagen: i can see you she's looking at me come here i can see you come here you're staring look she's

4:59Catherine Bohart: staring me down look at her all right now i've got eyes on the dog yeah i mean what a time to be alive time to be alive nothing quite like prom how much was it a ticket 20 quid was it more Can't remember. Who organized that? The prom committee. Glad I didn't take part in that. That must have been quite a lot of stress.

5:16Sophia Hagen: Must have been quite the task.

5:18Catherine Bohart: They genuinely had to organize the prom.

5:20Sophia Hagen: Yeah, but I think it was more like, these are the five options. Pick one. You know, this is what last year did.

5:26Catherine Bohart: This is what the year before did. You could do this. Yeah, it was always a golf course, wasn't it? Yeah.

5:31Sophia Hagen: But yeah, big up the prom committee. I mean, it's no easy feat. We didn't take it on, did we? We sat back and just showed up.

5:38Catherine Bohart: Marianne didn't get to go to prom

5:40Sophia Hagen: she was a COVID prom wasn't that quite sad god yeah I didn't even think about that we mustn't have had one I mean it wasn't really much to write home about no no no it's more for the pictures we definitely got the nice picture I mean I bet they're all making TikToks now aren't they at prom well yeah that's the vibe

5:57Catherine Bohart: yeah they're all probably making makeup tutorials I mean we did a makeup tutorial if you will

6:01Sophia Hagen: we did yeah that was our sign off we did a get ready with us it was our YouTube debut

6:05Catherine Bohart: Absolutely it was. First time speaking on the internet.

6:10Sophia Hagen: Shout out. And our voices are completely different. Well, we're here.

6:13Catherine Bohart: I'm manifesting spring in butter yellow.

6:17Sophia Hagen: Butter yellow.

6:17Catherine Bohart: Actually, to be specific, the candlelight yellow collection from Ally. Oh, it's the candlelight collection. Yeah. Also got the socks on.

6:26Sophia Hagen: Oh, excuse the mud. It's a bit rainy outside. I really want the Lululemon pants.

6:33Catherine Bohart: No, I've not seen these. What?

6:34Sophia Hagen: knickers no they're called the groove pants oh didn't realize okay i think they're called the groove pants and blueberry everyone's just raving about them so yeah they're all over my feed so i'm

6:47Catherine Bohart: really keen to get my hands on a pair yeah but will you must show me those i will show you those yeah i'm actually wearing a brandy melville jogger wow which fit me slay one size fit me nicely uh

7:00Sophia Hagen: I went to Brandy Melville about six months ago and I had a real like feeling like I'm in a nightclub that I shouldn't be in

7:09Catherine Bohart: no we're still we're still fit in there absolutely I didn't feel like I did well yeah it must have been the clientele

7:16Sophia Hagen: that were in there at the time and I thought you must be looking at me thinking what the hell this ain't for you babes

7:22Catherine Bohart: when I went in there was a lot of posh girls with their mums oh okay yeah shout out I mean lovely you know So I'd love to walk in there with my mum.

7:32Sophia Hagen: Absolutely. So would I. You know. Can I have this? Can I have this? Yeah. I'll have this as well too, please. What a lovely treat.

7:38Catherine Bohart: I actually bought some quite nice bits. Did you? I bought an Italia jumper. Ah, nice. Back to my roots. Back to your roots. Always got to connect with Italy when you can.

7:47Sophia Hagen: Absolutely. Absolutely. Right.

7:49Catherine Bohart: We're going to dive into the question of the week. Right. Welcome back, everyone.

7:53Sophia Hagen: Sorry, the blueberry interruptions.

7:56Catherine Bohart: She's causing a ruckus in here today. She's finding. she'll sniff out anything that she's not meant to have this morning she she um got a um you know the cardboard from the toilet roll whatever yes and then she just completely destroyed it i mean it's a classic toy of course but i don't want you to ingest that i would let you play with it if you

8:13Sophia Hagen: weren't trying to swallow it like you're trying to eat it yeah and that's not food no and that can actually be seriously damaging exactly maybe not cardboard but i mean our our dog coco our may she rest in peace may she rest she um ate something once and it got all bound up and she had to have an operation really

8:31Catherine Bohart: you see that is my fear

8:33Sophia Hagen: a lot of her intestine and I bet that cost that did cost as well yeah pet insurance didn't cover that yeah so yeah it is yeah

8:43Catherine Bohart: yeah you see well you know the mother's instinct

8:45Sophia Hagen: gotta watch what the dogs ingest yeah always mother's instincts are always on that's why when she goes out of sight blueberry the antennas are tingling where is my child where is my dog right question of the week this week is what's your most niche pet peeve oh have i got a niche pet peeve now it's really hard to think on the spot oh here you are let me think about a niche pet peeve okay okay i saw one wait sorry sorry you

9:15Catherine Bohart: go you go no i was actually in the gym this morning get it actually it was yesterday and this man you know when you're just trying to get something out your tooth yes he just had like his finger like in his mouth like right in front of me like trying to get there's something out of

9:29Sophia Hagen: his mouth and i had to just look down that's not appropriate and that did no that's not shiver a little bit what comes to my mind is people who sit on their bed in their outside clothes

9:44Catherine Bohart: i understand it but sometimes you know i will i mean if i saw it's more of a niche pet peeve like

9:51Sophia Hagen: on myself right like i can't sit on my bed in outside clothes yeah if i saw you sit on your bed in outside clothes it i wouldn't see it as a it wouldn't bother me because i'm not sleeping there you know absolutely you just judge me yeah for the jokes of course i just be like yeah okay i've got yeah sure sure sure sure sure so outside bed in clothes um what else is a niche pet peeve

10:15Catherine Bohart: let me think let me think see i have a dog who roams the streets of london and then get straight in my bed so yeah that's crazy when you deep it but then it's like i kiss her paws they're not that dirty like yeah that's crazy yeah uh thank god you know if i think about the germs too much

10:32Sophia Hagen: yeah it's best not to yeah it's best not to uh what's another niche pet peeve well would you

10:37Catherine Bohart: like me to read yeah because it might give me some inspo listeners um black socks white shoes

10:44Sophia Hagen: yeah yeah i mean i've been guilty but i'm yeah i actually wore no socks with my foot with my faux fur slides yesterday and i don't enjoy that's okay yeah but my better than a raw trainer

10:56Catherine Bohart: true that's uncomfortable when people use whatsapp stories oh yeah i didn't know you could

11:02Sophia Hagen: do what yeah you can you know what i've been doing tiktok stories i've been seeing them i'm

11:06Catherine Bohart: usually feature yeah well it's only when it's only when on this day a memory and i'm like oh I'll share that to the story.

11:13Sophia Hagen: I don't see where to click that.

11:15Catherine Bohart: It's in your messages. What's she doing around there? Okay. She's on the sofa. She's on other people's sex. She's setting up in the other room.

11:25Sophia Hagen: Fine. She's sick of us. We've gotten her days when Blueberry would nestle with us on this chair. I know. She's grown up. She's flown the nest. I know.

11:32Catherine Bohart: We've got men spitting on the ground. Big pet peeve. Men spitting. I just want to. Huge pet peeve. Why? Why? Why? Because also like, why do they have an excess of phlegm? If I, for some reason - Yeah, where does it come from? Had an excess of phlegm, I would swallow it.

11:49Sophia Hagen: Yeah, I know. But that also makes me gag.

11:52Catherine Bohart: I know, but like -

11:53Sophia Hagen: Yeah.

11:53Catherine Bohart: But I don't think men produce more saliva unless they do. Yeah. But if we just have a normal amount of saliva, which I'm assuming men also have, why are they then having to eject it? I know. Surely they want to keep the moisture. On the pavement as well. Keep the moisture.

12:10Sophia Hagen: Yuck.

12:11Catherine Bohart: literally a yuck like blueberry probably stepped in some now it's in your bed and now it's on my pillow that's disgusting men people wearing jeans sat on the sofa yeah outside clothes indoors yeah i mean gee i'm having a rejection from jeans right now i mean i know i did wear them at the weekend

12:31Sophia Hagen: i'm a denim jean girl through and through yeah i mean i have been known to have big baggy comfy pairs and sometimes i will catch myself being like whoa i'm actually one so he's flown to new

12:41Catherine Bohart: york in a pair of jeans which is just i've flown to greece in a pair of jeans you've flown to new york in a pair of jeans no i haven't when did i fly to new york i'm sure i've seen that is fake news a long haul flight no that is fake news because i believe that's factual and if i showed

12:56Sophia Hagen: up to the airport with you i believe in a pair of jeans i wouldn't hear the end of it i believe

13:01Catherine Bohart: i've seen you at the airport you're you're incorrect i'm a faithful i'm gonna stand up

13:08Sophia Hagen: there and i'm gonna tell you that i'm faithful well i'm you know swear my life i have flown to greece in a pink pair of jeans but i mean i stand by it you may judge me but they were baggy and they were cool and i'm sorry that's good can i just speak no i have i have seen you i have seen

13:25Catherine Bohart: you in that denim pair of jeans which have the white tie oh the white tie was it australia you have been on a plane with me in that denim pair of jeans with that white tie weird that you remember

13:39Sophia Hagen: that it's a bit judgy well i definitely saw that and thought they are my extra large comfy pair of

13:45Catherine Bohart: jeans okay so what do you need to do then apologize to me because you said sorry you saying you've only worn that big pair of jeans. Was it New York? I swear on my life you wore them to New York. I stand corrected, although the memory's not coming to me. And we had a nice little layout bed and you wore on your jeans. Really? Yeah, I swear. Yeah, I could have.

14:05Sophia Hagen: And yes, you see, now she's backtracking. They are a revolved pair of jeans and they're very comfy. Yeah, they do look comfy. I wear them regularly.

14:14Catherine Bohart: Yes, I feel, yeah, okay. They're low rise, baggy, wide. Yeah, they look comfortable, but you have worn them on this plane. Okay. right we've got here um people that brush their teeth in the shower oh i support that i like that i think that's sufficient that's really you get more shower time at all it's quite enjoyable yeah just because you know brushing your teeth can be messy it's quite nice to let it run um we've got when people eat pizza with a knife and fork sometimes it's sloppy and you have to sometimes it's sloppy but also like yeah yeah but i've definitely done that when a man has a small

14:50Sophia Hagen: torso okay oh well that they can't choose that i've got a small torso i think do you think so i think we have regular size i think i'm here small you're long whoa accurate no as in you're

15:05Catherine Bohart: nice elongated i think we're i think we're normal i've seen a short torso and i don't think it's

15:10Sophia Hagen: yours i can't really picture a short torso i remember that girl from school who had a short

15:14Catherine Bohart: torso just a shorter belly yeah i'm trying to picture it yeah like really sure well it's like and then high waisted trousers are really high really high yeah i think we've got normal length i think we're average size totally yeah it's absolutely fine um a velcro wallet on a man i assume yeah but a man of a certain age yeah but if i had a vote i thought that'd be quite handy i think it's kind of cool i think it might come back men wearing flip-flops i'm not opposed to

15:43Sophia Hagen: definitely worn a flip-flop yeah absolutely he's a beautiful attractive man yeah we've got men on

15:49Catherine Bohart: the Stairmaster.

15:51Sophia Hagen: I had two men next to me this morning.

15:53Catherine Bohart: I don't like it when there's men next to me. I like it.

15:56Sophia Hagen: I actually had a nice man on the Stairmaster. Really? We were both on there for quite a while and it was one of those things where it's like.

16:02Catherine Bohart: I find they generally huff more.

16:05Sophia Hagen: Yeah but I like outperforming men on a Stairmaster. Yeah that's. You know it's a real good feeling. It's like I've been on here 15 minutes. You've got on, got off. I'm still here. I'm still clocked in. Like you're wheezing and hanging on for dear life.

16:17Catherine Bohart: You're hanging on. Take your arms off. Like, glam swing.

16:20Sophia Hagen: Like, loosen up. But I actually saw the Stairmaster before. You know, you meant to go hands through. And I had a really nice man. He may have been a gay guy, but he was really sweet. We were both on there for a while. And then I got off and then he, like, turned around and he was like, great hack with the Kindle. And I was like, thanks, enjoy. Oh, nice. So that was a nice interaction. That was nice. Yeah.

16:41Catherine Bohart: The old man who wears his just clothes was on the row machine this morning.

16:49Catherine Bohart: belt shirt trousers belt shirt shirt jumper belt suit trousers shoes i mean he's dressed for the day it's important this morning gotta make an effort okay niche pet peeves what else have we

17:01Sophia Hagen: got here men riding e-scooters i mean i'm also look at that i think that's just the most dangerous dangerous form of danger zone uh a wet bath mat yeah yeah yeah i mean you can't really help that a man losing his balance on any form of transport yes yes this is niche people eating apples oh i love an apple i love an apple sliced with some cheese you got something to say about that we're just making faces when someone sneezes more than twice i mean i mean guilty sometimes i've done you know a couple people that stand on the escalators instead of walking guilty guilty as charged god if it's an escalator i'm standing the duvet not being fully in the corners of the duvet cover yes i hate when it starts to move around i've got a few um duvet covers that are too big for my duvet men with long nails oh yeah no thanks when my husband makes a protein shake okay touching microfiber towels oh okay yeah i'm gonna google because i'm quite intrigued about this what's the most popular pet peeves because pet peeves are an interesting thing it it's because it's is it similar to an

18:28Catherine Bohart: ick but it's not an yeah it's not quite an ick is it off from a from someone but a pet peeve is is

18:38Sophia Hagen: is a pet peeve is a personal it's like i could have a pet peeve against you it's like not it's not like what everyone would you know it's not like they're niche aren't they they're personal yeah it's like i don't know why but that just annoys me yeah like my but it may not bother someone someone else would be like i don't care about that yeah it could be about a dog

18:55Catherine Bohart: yeah it could be about it could be about anyone yeah all right should we dive into the inbox

19:01Sophia Hagen: should we see what we've got skill talk this week wait you're gonna be really proud of me

19:05Catherine Bohart: okay watch tell me lies oh my goodness well i say i've watched it i've watched

19:11Sophia Hagen: three episodes three and a half okay nice yes I'm familiar now with Stephen DeMarco

19:16Catherine Bohart: and his

19:17Sophia Hagen: and Lucy and his awful tease yeah

19:19Catherine Bohart: yes okay good well it gets better season one season two very good it's quite yeah yeah it is but take your time you're not in a rush

19:27Sophia Hagen: no I'm enjoying it yeah but I mean like it makes me quite angry yes

19:31Catherine Bohart: I hate him well yes exactly I hate him and there's nothing you can do about it the way he manipulates and deceives and lies it's fascinating but there are that's real men do that that's right now we're on season three yeah three episodes in wow yeah and he's still doing the same bullshit really scary shit it is really scary shit you

19:54Sophia Hagen: can't even breathe i mean i'm very early days but even just like literally episode one episode two he's very stressful and he's like no i love you to the old there's some really great twists and

20:03Catherine Bohart: turns oh my god there's some really great twists and turns season one season two wow i'm in for a

20:10Sophia Hagen: No, really, truly.

20:11Catherine Bohart: Because it's everyone lies. It's like the whole tell me lies. Everyone is just lying. Oh my God. Everyone has secrets. Everyone is lying. Oh my God. So there's just so much. She's lying.

20:23Sophia Hagen: The main girl. Yeah. She's lying.

20:26Catherine Bohart: Yeah, stunning.

20:27Sophia Hagen: And they're together in real life. Yes, I did see that. Steve and Lucy.

20:30Catherine Bohart: Yeah. Yeah. And they're very happy. That's good. Yeah.

20:33Sophia Hagen: Must be hard for him.

20:34Catherine Bohart: To play that role. It looks like it comes natural. No, as in like now everyone hates him. Well, yeah, people are... Because he's doing such a good job. Yeah, people are struggling to understand that that's not how he is in real life. That's an actor. Because he looks evil. Just his demeanour is evil. Yeah. It means he's good at his job, but...

20:53Sophia Hagen: Absolutely. That kind of role follows you, I guess.

20:55Catherine Bohart: Yes, absolutely.

21:02Catherine Bohart: Just before we get into it, quick disclaimer. Just to say, we are not doctors. We are not professionals. We do not actually know what we are talking about. This is a lighthearted space. Okay. Don't take what we say literally because we could be wrong.

21:13Sophia Hagen: Yeah. And if there's anything serious, if there's anything you feel like you're seriously struggling with, please contact a GP, a professional, because that is not us. We're just girls, girls and boys just like you.

21:22Catherine Bohart: We're just trying to get through life as well. Not professionals. Enjoy the episode.

21:29Sophia Hagen: Okay. First dilemma this week for Girl Talk. we have got, I accidentally moved into a love triangle with my - Landlord. Landlord and my friend. Whoa. I'm a landlord. No, I'm not. I am technically, but I'm not involved. You're just not romantically involved with tenants.

21:51Catherine Bohart: Yes, yes, yes. Who is a man, by the way? I'm a landlord. No, I'm not. Who is a man? He is a man. There's a man in my flat.

21:59Sophia Hagen: Whoa, that's kind of crazy. It's kind of scary, isn't it? You have to sage it when he moves out. Yeah. Cleanse it. Yeah, absolutely. Need some frontal lobe developed girlies to help me out. We'll try our best, absolutely. Here we are. This is definitely a messy situation that I had absolutely no plans of getting myself into.

22:17Catherine Bohart: Also, this is foul play from the landlord. Surely a part of the - Very unprofessional. In the legal contract, it's no romantic. Yeah. It should be frowned upon with the -

22:25Sophia Hagen: Yes. So let's rewind to the beginning. Okay. in 2024 i moved out of home with my boy i moved out of home with my boyfriend at the time about eight months later we broke up and suddenly i had one week to find somewhere new to live my parents place wasn't an option so i jumped on flatmates.com the aussie hunger games oh we're

22:47Catherine Bohart: in australia flatmates.com oh why is it the aussie because trying to find a place to rent in australia

22:55Sophia Hagen: there's a rental crisis it's really hard survival of the fittest yeah i went to so many inspections with girls my age but i just didn't click with anyone the vibes were off the houses were off i started spiraling and thinking maybe i actually don't want to live with girls my age at all okay i see the hunger games reference now three or four days before i had to be out i made what i now recognize as my first mistake what i started looking at places with guys oh god i inspected this apartment and instantly loved it perfect location perfect space i just knew i wanted it the owner was a guy about 14 years older than me we'll call him brian when we met he seemed kind calm respectful and honestly safe i felt comfortable he lives there and is the landlord

23:42Catherine Bohart: owner was a guy okay so he owns the flat he lives and he's looking for a flatmate i guess so yeah

23:47Sophia Hagen: at first we got along really well like genuinely great flatmates oh god oh god he felt more like an older brother than anything else okay then slowly the vibe shifted i mean i'm sorry that's

23:59Catherine Bohart: such a risk isn't it moving in with a man this is we've never met just the two of you as well

24:04Sophia Hagen: with a stranger who's a guy but i guess maybe she thought like this because it's kind of like when you opt to live with strangers as opposed to your mates it's like simple politics what's mine is mine and I'm not touching your stuff. We're not sharing. And maybe if she thought, I don't actually want to live with four girls because then is there a friendship? Like, what if I don't like you guys? What if it's a bit like with my stuff? Like maybe she just thought a guy would be a clearer boundary with belongings, common spaces. You know, this is my bathroom. Don't come in here. Whereas the girls might be more like, oh, can I just borrow your straighteners?

24:40Catherine Bohart: And blah, blah, blah, blah.

24:41Sophia Hagen: But yeah, it's a bold move. Yeah. We got along great, genuinely great flatmates. He felt like an older brother. The vibe shifted. The compliments became more frequent.

24:53Catherine Bohart: Oh God, oh God, oh God.

24:54Sophia Hagen: The flirting crept in. Gosh. The occasional touch. I laughed it off and told myself I was overthinking. Until one night, we both had way too much to drink. Shit. And we kissed. Second mistake. Shit. Never kiss your flatmate.

25:12Catherine Bohart: This is crazy because I just watched the Friends episode where Joey, gets the Australian model dancer girlfriend, what's her name? Janine. And then they're all like, don't kiss her. Like you can't get involved. And then they kiss and then it just ends badly. Yeah. Spoiler.

25:29Sophia Hagen: Especially not one 14 years older than you. I immediately panicked. I could tell he wanted more and we were clearly at very different stages of life. We had a conversation, cleared the air and I very clearly said it was a drunken mistake and nothing more. To his credit - This is like a sitcom episode though, isn't it? He was understanding the flirting mostly stopped minus the occasional babe or compliment, but it felt manageable. Now, here's where it gets sticky. I have a friend, Lucy. Lucy had just gone through a pretty intense breakup. Lucy. And needed to move out ASAP. Like Lucy and Stephen.

26:04Sophia Hagen: Like Lucy and Stephen. We'd only been friends for about six months and I've always sworn I'd never lived with friends because, well, this. Oh, my God. Brian and I had a spare room and Lucy knew that. I told her I'd mention it to Brian, but I warned her up front. He's older. He can be flirty. You're very vulnerable right now. Just be careful. She said she understood. He's obviously a handsome guy.

26:31Catherine Bohart: Yeah, but also it's so inappropriate from him. Like this lady, you own the flat. You've obviously got like, you know, what's the word?

26:39Sophia Hagen: But you're obviously thinking you're probably going to fancy him. You're vulnerable right now. And he's charming. He is charming. Be careful. Like he's obviously got, yeah, he owns the flat.

26:47Catherine Bohart: Like it's obviously got a bit of something going on.

26:49Sophia Hagen: She said she understood. Lucy came over to see the space and I swear to God, the second they met, it was immediate sexual tension. Like you could cut it with a knife.

26:59Catherine Bohart: What is Brian up to? Like stop, like find someone else who's not in your flat, who doesn't live here.

27:05Sophia Hagen: As soon as we left, Lucy said, why didn't you tell me Brian was hot? I replied, he's not. And he's also 14 years older than us.

27:13Catherine Bohart: Does Lucy know that you guys have kissed? Obviously not.

27:16Sophia Hagen: Against my better judgment, Lucy moved in. Oh my. Okay. The first few weeks were fine until my stuff started disappearing. Oh God. Hair ties. Swimmers. What's that? Bikinis. Bikinis, of course, for in Australia. Yeah, of course. Makeup opened. Shampoo mysteriously emptier than before. I let it go. She was my friend. She was going through a breakup. But then I started noticing Brian and Lucy getting closer. I'm a nurse and work long shifts so Brian and I always worked well as flatmates because we were both super busy Lucy however barely worked I'd come home and they'd be cooking dinner together watching shows together bonding also if we're like flat sharing we're not cooking dinner together what's my ingredients are my ingredients and what's your ingredients are your ingredients don't touch my ketchup like I've got that sorry we're house sharing I don't know you

28:08Catherine Bohart: we're strangers in the night

28:10Sophia Hagen: We're not cooking together and watching shows. I'm not waiting to watch Traitors for a flat share. No. Unless there was a real connection there. I just think he's got, he thinks he's got the sweetest deal. Sweetest deal.

28:21Catherine Bohart: Like, oh, I've got one fit chick now. I've got another moved in. Single, vulnerable, naive, heartbroken.

28:27Sophia Hagen: I don't like this guy. All the things Brian and I had done when I first moved in. Oh my God. So I originally just thought it was quite nice they were getting to know each other. This must be just what he does. Then things got weirder. Lucy stopped wanting to hang out with me Brian stopped speaking to me properly One weekend I went away for work And got a call from a friend Who'd popped over to our place Apparently Brian and Lucy Were basically hooking up on the couch And looked guilty as hell when she walked in

28:56Catherine Bohart: Like I sit on that sofa Guys You've each got a bed

29:01Sophia Hagen: Later that night I got photos from friends Of them together at our local club Canoodling in corners multiple texts saying my flatmates were acting sus so i messaged brian and asked straight up if anything was going on he told me i was overthinking nothing was happening and then if it ever did he would tell me of course when i got home both of them doubled down and said my friends had exaggerated everything but lucy kept making weird comments about me what i wore around the house making digs in front of brian you know why are you wearing makeup to the gym etc very pickly very uncomfortable very judgy over time it got worse they were inseparable ice cream dates beach walks runs together cooking every night not even acknowledging me when i walked in the door i felt like they just want you out they want you out babes yeah lucy's she wants you out yeah she wants you gone they're trying to like you've lost this narrative they're trying to drive you out they are it feels like they're trying to make you feel uncomfortable so you want to go exactly yeah I felt like I was living in a house with a married couple I was the awkward third wheel in my own home a home I once felt safe in I brought it up again explaining how uncomfortable I was Brian got extremely defensive and told me I was immature and that I should act more like Lucy

30:22Catherine Bohart: but also like Lucy you're my friend you were my friend first

30:27Sophia Hagen: I offered you sanctuary I warned you about this guy because you recently had a breakup

30:32Catherine Bohart: But literally, I've warned you about this guy. He's got in your head and now he's turned you against me. He's turned you. This is ridiculous.

30:37Sophia Hagen: A few days later, I accidentally saw messages on Lucy's phone of them talking about me, calling me immature and saying they wish they had the house with themselves.

30:45Catherine Bohart: Lucy's a traitor. Lucy is a traitor. But Lucy was vulnerable and we warned her that this guy's going to get in your head and he literally has. And now he's turned you against me and now you're trying to shit about me.

30:56Sophia Hagen: Right. Well, basically at the end here, I went on a big holiday shortly after and cut contact with both of them. Lucy tried reaching out, but I ignored it. Since being back, I've tried to move on, but my friends say, maybe I'm just jealous. But honestly, ouch. Oh, what, because you did canoodle with him? But honestly, it just doesn't feel like jealousy. It feels like betrayal from them both. It seems so hard to get out of this situation as I'll come out of it looking like the crazy one and lose two friends. So girls, am I crazy or did they completely cross a line? Picture was attached. Me, middle, Lucy and Brian Oh my god It's just the three of them

31:32Catherine Bohart: Get in Oh my god

31:33Sophia Hagen: It's so Australia coded

31:35Catherine Bohart: I'm trying to visualise All of them Wait

31:36Sophia Hagen: Oh my god Okay Brian Brian really looks older Like I'm quite surprised Really Yeah Brian looks older Than I thought he would Well let's just say

31:45Catherine Bohart: Let's say our girls are 25 I mean the girls are

31:48Sophia Hagen: Fit Really fit Yeah So if we're the girls

31:52Catherine Bohart: And we're like 25 He's how old What's 14 years plus 25 30

32:00Sophia Hagen: say it again wait 25 i'm not good with numbers guys my brain really freaks out he's 39 he's 39 yeah and he looks it does he can i say yeah okay so me middle right i mean she's giving stunning sorry my phone's got on the edge of my seat

32:22Catherine Bohart: middle lucy brian that dirty dirty dog that guy and then wait for this one they look yeah he looks

32:31Sophia Hagen: old doesn't he look old there as well that's him and lucy obviously when it was happier times yeah happier times he looks old in that one i don't like this guy no why do you need i'm not

32:43Catherine Bohart: I'm not really sure why he's got such an alyore.

32:44Sophia Hagen: Why do you need flatmates who are 14 years younger than you? No offense, but you could both do a lot better than him. Well, he's just got the mustache.

32:54Catherine Bohart: That's what they like. That's the, every single Australian boy has a mustache. But he's not even giving like, I don't know. He must have the gift of the gab.

33:04Sophia Hagen: Like it, I mean, it doesn't look, maybe it's just a bad pick.

33:07Catherine Bohart: Maybe he's like six foot four. Could you just really zoom in on his face?

33:10Sophia Hagen: I'm trying, but like that, like to me, like this guy looks like kind of creepy and like someone who you would hire to play like a serial killer. Yeah, I understand. Right?

33:25Catherine Bohart: Like, yeah, scary. He must have, he must be like, have the gift of the gal. That's all I can think. And that mustache saves him, I fear. Really? If he didn't have that mustache on, imagine his face.

33:35Sophia Hagen: I think he needs a beard. Yeah. I think he needs more.

33:39Catherine Bohart: But the Australian man thing is a moustache.

33:43Sophia Hagen: Yeah. I've seen like men's TikToks of like the Australia effect.

33:47Catherine Bohart: These boys who move from England to Australia and they always end up with a moustache.

33:51Sophia Hagen: And a perm.

33:52Catherine Bohart: Yeah. Brain Mark Hayhurst coded. Very. Okay. Yeah. Right. So your friends are telling you that you're jealous. That's. Right. To start off with, I don't like this guy.

34:02Sophia Hagen: This guy's a creep. He's a creep. And he's a preying on young women who is getting to move into his place.

34:09Catherine Bohart: I don't like how he's got, yeah, girls who are 15 years younger than him. 14. Living in his house. You know, find some boys, like get a life. You're 39. You don't need flatmates. You don't need flatmates.

34:21Sophia Hagen: Like, is this how you meet people? I think so.

34:24Catherine Bohart: Getting people to move in. I think he's 39. Yeah. He's definitely had loads of other female flatmates. Who he's slept with or kissed. Yeah, this is what he does. I don't like it.

34:34Sophia Hagen: It reminds me of this guy I used to work with. And he was quite old. He was like in his 40s. The little man. Yeah. But he would tell everyone that he was like 27. Yeah, that is fucked. And he could like weirdly pass for it. That's so weird. Like now we've grown up. He would have to tell all the new people, like he's not actually 27. Like he is old.

34:52Catherine Bohart: Sophia, he should have been arrested for that. Actually deep that. I know. But at the time we did think that that was normal and that that guy was just like, oh yeah. We thought he was just trying to blend in

35:00Sophia Hagen: with all like the young folk. But that's not. But yeah, it's giving that. That's not right. You don't need flatmates, you're 39. Well, obviously he doesn't want to grow up. Especially women who are like, no, yeah, 14, 15 years younger than you.

35:13Catherine Bohart: Naive. Yeah. Just gone through breakups. Yeah. You know. Vulnerable. Vulnerable. And you're there turning on the charm. Yeah. And like, just because, you know, you've got a big mustache. Does Lucy know that you kissed? I don't think so. I'm not sure, but I don't think so. Yeah. Anyway, this is the problem. Yeah. I mean, I can only compare it to like hearing stories from like uni holes.

35:38Sophia Hagen: and like just like sleeping with the boys.

35:41Catherine Bohart: It's never good. Always going to end in tears. Lucy was warned. I mean, I think it's this guy. You need to get out of the flat. But you know that. We need to get out of the flat. But this guy is the fucking freak.

35:55Sophia Hagen: Maybe living with the girls is a much better idea.

35:57Catherine Bohart: He's got in her head, turning. You knew it was going to happen. Spitting a web of lies, turning her against you. You know, when you've got the love goggles on, that's unfortunately how easy it is for guys because i wouldn't be surprised if brian has

36:12Sophia Hagen: actually told lucy some lies some like false narrative that you were pining after him and you were obsessed with him and he had to really shut it down because he felt like it wasn't appropriate and you know it was really awkward around the house but it's so different with you like i'm so obsessed with you like now i've met you it was like meant to be like you're so different to all

36:33Catherine Bohart: the rest like yeah other girls that you have ever dated you're so you're so mature especially so different to uh sarah you know i feel so bad for her you know like she was just like she really wanted me really yeah i feel like he is spinning a real of course he's he's really in her head yeah and he has lied and manipulate and he's literally turned your friend against you that's not normal not normal so how should she proceed in this situation i would try and get out of there asap

36:59Sophia Hagen: yeah I mean I think you could try and talk to Lucy well it's gonna end in tears for Lucy I also unless she is like one in a million I don't think that conversation is gonna be well received because I think she is gonna because she is being manipulated right now and she does she's in that bubble of like oh my god I've got the new guy I'm living with him it's really exciting like it's a little bit secretive but it's not like she's in that zone right now so I think you going to her and saying like, look, I really want to talk to you. I did warn you about this. I think it's kind of weird. Like you've been really distant with me.

37:34Sophia Hagen: Has he got in your head? Blah, blah, blah, blah. I don't think that's gonna - Was he told you about me?

37:38Catherine Bohart: I think that might fall on deaf ears.

37:40Sophia Hagen: I don't think she's gonna be very receptive to that conversation.

37:43Catherine Bohart: She's already gonna have a wall shot.

37:44Sophia Hagen: She's gonna be, cause she's not in the space to -

37:48Catherine Bohart: I think she's fallen in love with him. Process it. I think she's fallen in love with him.

37:51Sophia Hagen: I think they both want you out. Defo. So whether you approach Lucy or not, I would be wary because I don't, I mean, you can, if you want to get it off your chest, but I don't know how well it's going to be received at the moment. So that's an option. People have to make their own mistakes, you know, and people have to make their own decisions. Yeah.

38:09Catherine Bohart: But then I appreciate it. It's so hard to find a new flat right now. Yeah. You probably had a good deal. So try and explore your options. I would actually speak to Lucy one-on-one away from the devil. But she's in love with the devil. I know and you can't I I know but just try and be like look I did warn you about this she's then gonna go to him and say oh my god you'll never guess what Lucy said to me today it's Stephen DeMarco so yeah I mean try and get out of there I don't like how they've spun this

38:37Sophia Hagen: web of lies especially with all your other friends now and also like you now this has just reaffirmed your boundaries like you said before that you don't live with friends this is point and case proven like this is why you don't live with friends and yeah don't get involved with your flatmates like i think it's time to get hunting again maybe go back to thinking about living with the girls flatmates.com yeah let's have a look and let's have a look but but yeah fucking hell it's a shame that it's all gone south well yeah because it could have worked it could have worked

39:12Catherine Bohart: if lucy and brian didn't get but it's all brian it's brian he's the creep yeah and you know we're young girls like yeah easily influenced like he's got the gift of the gab he's got a mustache whatever you know good luck to you guys honestly good luck because go and get a yochi

39:30Sophia Hagen: and relax oh go get your take the edge off with the yochi yeah if any of you australians didn't

39:35Catherine Bohart: know they've got that amazing deal on on sundays if you do your 10 000 steps before 2 p.m you get

39:40Sophia Hagen: it half price i'd be doing that okay every sunday wouldn't we what a lovely incentive lovely incentive

39:46Catherine Bohart: Like truly.

39:47Sophia Hagen: I mean, I don't need the incentive, but like, wow. Right. Get it half price, nice. That would be.

39:51Catherine Bohart: So sweet. You just got to show them that you've stepped.

39:53Sophia Hagen: I'm going there Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. I'm there regardless.

39:57Catherine Bohart: I'm, yeah. Fucking hell. I want it so bad. I could eat it right now. I could eat it right this sack.

40:08Oh, you feel it taking over you.

40:16Catherine Bohart: Okay. We have here a situation regarding a mother and a boyfriend and a potential engagement. So we have here, my mum lied to my boyfriend and told him I was going to break up with him if he didn't propose by April.

40:37Sophia Hagen: Wow. Mum's doing the hard work for you. Mum's offering the ultimatum for you. I know, but this could end so badly.

40:45Catherine Bohart: Don't get involved. Sorry, this could end badly. Don't get involved. Yeah, I guess so. Like if my mum did, made a move like this, could you imagine?

40:53Sophia Hagen: I'd be like, are you fucking,

40:54Catherine Bohart: what the fuck are you on about?

40:56Sophia Hagen: Yeah, that's crazy. I wonder what mum's motives were. She's obviously trying to put the pressure on. Yeah. She wants, you know,

41:03Catherine Bohart: she wants a wedding next summer, summer 2027. You know? She wants it. She's ready for it. She's ready for it. Ready to be mother of the bride. Yeah. Hi girls, love you both so much. I discovered the pod back in 2022 when I had a five-hour drive ahead of me and was looking through random podcasts and stumbled across yours. Wow, are we really stumbling across like that? Wow, we must be, yeah. That's really good to know.

41:23Sophia Hagen: Well, we were in 2022. Yeah, that's good. Maybe not these days.

41:25Catherine Bohart: Needless to today, I've been hooked since. Thank you, Sarah. Thank you, Sarah. Thank you for being here. I am 25 female and my Brian is 28 male. Nice, I like that. We've been together for seven years. Wow. Lived together for five and honestly, he is truly my best friend and the kindest person I've ever met. I thank my lucky stars for him We got together when I was 18 So I know while most people do Do get engaged much quicker than us We were both so young And we always had a plan Yeah like you were so young there was no rush Yeah And you're still only 25 You're only 25 Like you know We both wanted to be finished with our degrees Have good jobs, buy a house, get a dog Save up some money And then we'd plan on getting engaged I know this isn't for everyone and some people would want to be engaged by now but I didn't want to be getting married and still renting personally so that was our order yeah you got your financial planning and every couple is on their own timeline like you just because Susan's got engaged at 24

42:30Sophia Hagen: doesn't mean you have to no you've got different priorities exactly in November 2025 we bought our

42:35Catherine Bohart: dream home wow um one that's big enough enough for us to have hopefully our future family in and we got a dog so the stars are finally aligned and it might be happening in the next year or two i'm excited but i don't want to overthink every anniversary dinner romantic moment thinking he could propose so i'm just living in the moment for now and seeing what happens onto the issue since i was 22 so for three years my mom has not stopped hounding me on when we're getting engaged and getting married i'd be like mom stop it now wow i'd be like you need to stop now every christmas holiday big occasion she thinks she's gonna she thinks he's gonna propose and has even gone so far as to tell other family members that he's planning on proposing on that trip what she's

43:22Sophia Hagen: manifesting hard yeah yeah she's really trying to speak into existence wow i told her numerous times

43:28Catherine Bohart: our plan but she refuses to listen we went on a big family holiday this year in july and i'm not joking when i say every single day she asked my brian was today the day what it was so awkward and uncomfortable that i decided to have a proper convo with her yeah and tell her she needs to stop i even threatened that i would just elope and wouldn't invite her because if she was being this crazy over the proposal what we should be like at the wedding that's true good point we spent christmas with my family this year and i noticed one day that my brain got quite quiet and shut down on me i constantly asked him if he was okay and he said he was fine but i could tell

44:07Sophia Hagen: there was something bothering him oh no so this is when your mom said oh my god on the drive home

44:13Catherine Bohart: he asked me about our timeline and he basically said he was sorry if i was expecting a proposal at Christmas. What? I was pretty stunned and said I wasn't at all. It's only been one month since everything slotted into place, you know, with our home and our dog. Yeah, we just bought the house, we've just got the dog. I think it would be at least a year before we get our savings back up after putting the deposit down on our home. He then looked at me confused. He told me that on Boxing Day, my mum pulled him aside and told him, she needs to stop meddling. Pulling him for a

44:43Sophia Hagen: quick chat like at the fire i've already told you to stop she is meddling that's it's meddling

44:48Catherine Bohart: it's meddling and it's really destructive yes like it actually is you know destructive meddling because like this is that she's been going on for years you've been hounding me for three years and hounding this poor boy wow she's passionate um and told him that i had told her that i was so heartbroken he hasn't proposed and that i was giving him until our anniversary in april then I was breaking up with him that is insane that you weren't gonna find out that yeah she obviously thought Brian would go oh shit okay well I'll definitely propose yeah I like it wasn't a big deal but that is a you can't just say that um girls when I tell you I was ready to turn around and go confront my mom at the moment I was yeah I'm so hurt that she tried to take such control over my future like that I don't want a shut up ring I want you know this is the perfect moment right timing for both of us i don't know what to do i need some time to calm down i've had numerous conversations with my mom about this we don't have the best relationship as she's always favored my brother that's a story for another day oh right another email she obviously feels like i don't know why would she feel like she should like she should be happy that her daughter's in a happy relationship

46:05Sophia Hagen: you know bought a home i think some pair i think she's got a very clear idea of the life that she thought you were going to have and the way that she thought you were what she thought you were going to do and you're not quite matching up to what she imagined that you would do that she has yeah you've got your own time you've got your own timeline and she's got a different one she wants to get you on hers as opposed to just sitting back and watching you live your life she's trying to

46:33Catherine Bohart: meddle since you said meddling and it's destructive because like now my brian is upset with me because i know she's excited but she almost ruined my relationship i've spoken to her once over the last three weeks and just had a very quick blunt chat please help i'm trying to plan what to do next to try and get through to her or if i just give up trying and stop talking to her about this side of my life thanks i'm very stressed sarah oh sarah i would if this was my mom

47:02Sophia Hagen: yeah okay what are you doing you can't do this give it a rest like we're gonna get engaged but

47:08Catherine Bohart: like i'm not in a rush we've just bought the house that was a big stress it was a big big move financially yeah like a ring is another financial thing and a wedding yeah i'm not

47:18Sophia Hagen: when it happens yeah i'm not worried like please relax like i'm not happy yeah you have to just call her out and and i would say to brian like you know what my mom's like you know what she's

47:31Catherine Bohart: like no i'm sorry but say to him i appreciate you telling me what was said yes you know because that could have really been bad for us if you hadn't have come to me about that so at least you guys have got good line of communication yeah you know because he could just say back off i would just

47:45Sophia Hagen: say also like i don't know if you really want to get to the root of it i would be like what do you think's going to change when we get engaged like why are you like i like what i appreciate your rooting for our relationship but also you're kind of sabotaging it by spreading this false narrative and putting this unnecessary pressure on my boyfriend like it will happen one day like why are you so rushed like i'm not rushed why are you so rushed like it feels like she wants to keep up appearances to maybe her other friends yeah maybe her other friends have got daughters who are

48:21Catherine Bohart: engaged getting married and they're like when is your daughter gonna get and oh well haven't they been together for seven years no ring oh yeah that's a good point i reckon she's maybe getting judgment from her other mates and that's where it's coming and then that's where it's coming she's trying to keep up appearances and she say that be like what's this about i'm so confused are you trying to impress yeah it's it is like she wants to be able to tell others and it's nothing to do with you because she obviously she favors your brother or whatever yeah it's that she still sees an engagement and a wedding as like a pivotal moment like my daughter's doing really well it's a big tick box yeah like my daughter's engaged and she's married and i can tell everyone that now she's a success like she's a success even though you've just bought your own you bought your family house you've got a dog like i think she still sees it like that yeah and she's she wants to go post

49:11Sophia Hagen: on facebook and she wants to tell her mates literally and tell linda i genuinely think it's Jane.

49:15Catherine Bohart: Yeah, she wants to tell Jane.

49:16Sophia Hagen: Yeah. She wants to tell Margot. Guys, get a load of this.

49:18Catherine Bohart: Yeah. Like, finally, yes. Oh, I'm so excited for the wedding. Like, it's about keeping up appearances. Yeah. I wouldn't put it faster. I wouldn't put it faster.

49:25Sophia Hagen: I wouldn't put it faster on it.

49:26Catherine Bohart: Yeah.

49:26Sophia Hagen: You just got to say, back off. What's it to you? Yeah, like, sure. It'll be a great day when it happens, but for now, we've just got it to look forward to.

49:32Catherine Bohart: Yeah, and like, if you keep moving like this, then I'm never going to tell you anything. Yeah, because you're sabotaging. And at this rate, you won't be coming to the wedding.

49:38Sophia Hagen: Yeah. Chill out.

49:39Catherine Bohart: like chill out stop getting your nose involved good luck sarah

49:51Sophia Hagen: right our final one today i mean this speaking of weddings this is what you don't want the girl he cheated on me with is also a bridesmaid in what universe is that a sentence like seriously in what universe

50:06Catherine Bohart: what I'm assuming here is that you were a bridesmaid so the other girl was a bridesmaid I'm assuming she was aware of you and your relationship just because it sounds like we're in the same circles yeah so like that's even worse

50:17Sophia Hagen: how are you a brides oh right anyway let's read the story let's read the story I've been with my Brian for five years we are so in love and happy okay five oh are we are present oh my god we're still together we're still together after the cheat that's even worse we've got married by the sounds of it

50:35Catherine Bohart: so now we've both got to go to the wedding he's going to see the girl that he cheated on me

50:39Sophia Hagen: oh sorry I'm thinking it's your wedding

50:41Catherine Bohart: I don't think it's her wedding

50:42Sophia Hagen: and I thought how is that happening

50:44Catherine Bohart: I think she's a bridesmaid another girl is a bridesmaid oh my god sorry I thought for a sec

50:48Sophia Hagen: what the hell is going on so we're so in love and happy we had a rocky patch three years ago so two years into the relationship so it's not recent it's not recent and during this Brian started messaging another girl helen fuck brian come on you're better than this anyway sorry you're better than this nothing physical happened but the messages weren't innocent so i still class this as cheating of course it's a classic low self-esteem boy looking for attention elsewhere situation you got it classic yeah it's a classic case we took a break and eventually worked things out and everything is wonderful now.

51:30Sophia Hagen: The issue is, Helen is a family friend of Brian's family and both her... Oh my God.

51:38Catherine Bohart: Oh Lord, Lord, Lord.

51:40Sophia Hagen: So this woman that he's cheated with is so close to home. Not even the decency to do it with a stranger.

51:47Catherine Bohart: Yeah.

51:48Sophia Hagen: You chose someone that was really in a close circle. I'd rather it be a stranger. Rather it be a stranger. But you know what it's giving?

51:54Catherine Bohart: It's giving they've done something before. and it's giving that he's fancied her for a while and has always thought about yeah and that's even worse like I'd rather it be a stranger

52:07Sophia Hagen: so Helen but that was three years ago we've moved on

52:10Catherine Bohart: yeah we've moved but she's

52:12Sophia Hagen: but we'll never forget but we'll never fucking forget

52:14Catherine Bohart: wait and she's going to be at the wedding with all her family and everyone

52:16Sophia Hagen: Helen's a family friend of Brian's family and both her and I have been asked to be bridesmaids at Brian's sister's wedding in March lord only his parents know this happened as i did not want this to be a big piece of gossip so his sister has no idea what i think his sister needs to know i think his sister needs to again

52:38Catherine Bohart: knock some sense into him even though it was three years ago but the sister never knew yeah

52:43Sophia Hagen: that's insane the parents knew but helen knew but helen knew he was with you's helen told you know we can't control that helen's told everyone i used to be very oh my god i used to be very friendly with Helen at family gatherings, but believed she had feelings for Brian all along and essentially got used in his self-destruction because she thought she was finally getting her shot. After finding the messages between them, I messaged Helen to try and make sense of the situation, but she was not receptive and was quite rude to me, despite her role in what had happened.

53:15Catherine Bohart: What were they saying?

53:16Sophia Hagen: It would have just been like flirty, like, oh, I wish and da da da da da da da. It would have been like. And like, oh, like teasing. Like, oh, I bet you wish you could. Ha ha, you wish. Yeah, you wish.

53:28Catherine Bohart: You wish you could, you know, kiss these lips. Yeah.

53:32Sophia Hagen: I messaged Helen, okay? She was not receptive. I don't blame her as I know it was Brian's fault. But I think if I was the other woman in the situation, I'd feel guilt and want to try and make the girl's decision easier by being open with what had happened. However, she's in love with Brian and thought she had a chance. So she. she thought she was taking your spot because at the time I wasn't believing a word that came out of Brian's mouth so yeah you went to her as a woman woman to woman and said look I'm not even angry at you I'm just trying to make sense of what's happened so can you tell me from your point of view like what went down like I'm not angry at you I'm pissed off at my boyfriend and I just need some more contact and she wasn't giving you anything no she wants you out the

54:11Catherine Bohart: picture because she wants Brian to herself she thought finally the stars are aligning I'm finally gonna have my man who i've been in love with since i was eight years old right right but no

54:22Sophia Hagen: i've seen helen once at a christening last year and made sure to stay out of her way nice i have truly forgiven brian and we have moved on good i hope so and i've been in a very different healthier relationship since then does he wonder what his interactions with helen are like is he allowed

54:39Catherine Bohart: non-existent i should i should well yeah but like but if the family's there only the mom and dad nose can't make it all very awkward for everyone else the sister doesn't know sister doesn't know

54:47Sophia Hagen: that's mental the fact that the sister doesn't know is wild yeah because if anything like as

54:52Catherine Bohart: you sarah it might be really quite nice to talk to his sister i think so yeah because that's his sister that's his sister but like oh you know what your brother fucking did yeah you never guess what your brother did she might love helen she might be rooting for helen we don't know we don't know she could be secret team helen yeah like oh they will end up together but just give them time I want Sarah's out the picture we'll watch it all play out we just

55:16Sophia Hagen: gotta sit back we can't interfere just give it time just give it time we know it we know Helen and Brian's always been it was always gonna be those two we just gotta wait oh my god sorry Sarah we're not hoping

55:27Catherine Bohart: so we saw a christening was stayed out of way nice truly forgiven Brian

55:32Sophia Hagen: but I am very worried

55:34Catherine Bohart: you've got to see the lady

55:35Sophia Hagen: I'm very worried about the forced proximity I will be in with this girl I mean look we obviously don't see each other a lot like it's probably i'm imagining more the mums of family friends like you saw her once at a christening last year we're not seeing each other every week for sunday dinner thankfully yeah

55:52Catherine Bohart: however a wedding is quite yeah it's a lot we're gonna have a hen do we're gonna have you know my god we're gonna have a hen do well yeah and we're gonna it depends hopefully there's like over 10 of us but it might be an intimate hen do there might be just we're gonna be going to try on dresses yeah as a gang and then we might have a full weekend of facilities that we've got to be united as the bridesmaids yes and having fun there's only three of us vibes only three of us in sage green it's a lot of pressure yeah it's a lot of responsibility yeah uh luckily she could not come to the hen do earlier this year brilliant news of course so i managed to escape it then

56:27Sophia Hagen: i am worried this will drag up unwanted feelings as though i as although i have moved on in my relationship it can still impact me in terms of self-confidence my question is do i avoid her and risk making it awkward and obvious to other people? Or do I force small talk to break the ice? I don't want to be her best friend, but I don't know what the best option is to make myself feel better on the day. I won't be causing any sort of confrontation or drama, but I hate the thought of not being able to enjoy the day as she's around me all morning, dinner, et cetera. Yeah, you're going to be sat close.

57:00Sophia Hagen: Getting ready. The end.

57:04Catherine Bohart: i think um you just go in there confidence level 10 head held high head held high unbothered smiley good memory good attitude and just hi helen how are you lovely to see you're looking amazing you're looking really well looking really well looking really well and then moving on like like like you don't have to ice her out no because yeah then that's good people are going to ask questions you know why sarah being you know then book on a spot you can be you can put on a facade

57:35Sophia Hagen: absolutely it's just a facade it's just a facade and it's confidence level 10 this doesn't affect me i'm happy now we've moved on this is my because also you know you're you're there quite confidently like this is my sister-in-law yeah oh is it well yeah it's brian's sister oh i didn't you know when you and brian are married this is going to be your sister-in-law like you're really part of the family you're just a family friend i'm actually part are you in the bloodline like no like this is going to be my children's auntie i'm very i'm very warranted to be here you're kind of like you know the connections loose absolutely you know and if people knew what you did you'd be iced out i yeah well look there's nothing you can do about it sarah's chosen you've already had the hen do so i'm imagining you know these bridesmaids were chosen a long time ago this is going to be a challenging day and it's probably going to bring up some feelings and you are probably going to be looking at thinking it's going to be bringing all sorts of questions into your mind of what was this and what was this and how do you feel and blah blah blah blah but yeah I think the best thing you can do is go in very calm very level-headed look I've moved on it was three years ago I'm very happy I'm very happy with my relationship I'm so lucky I've got all this beautiful people around me I love this family that I'm a part of you you're kind of irrelevant to me like I'll be polite i'll be friendly but we don't have to chit chat and we don't have to like i'm not going to give you the satisfaction of seeing me bothered or upset or like i want you to see me so smiley and happy that is winding you up secure you know and secure secure i'm secure yeah we're hand in because i do think if she saw you upset bothered aggravated emotional she would be secretly happy and i don't want to give her that satisfaction she'd be laughing that she still has an effect

59:23Catherine Bohart: on your relationship three years later. Yeah. Yeah? Three years later. And you don't want her to feel like that.

59:28Sophia Hagen: No.

59:29Catherine Bohart: I would also keep the alcohol to a minimum. Me too. Just so that we're not having any alcohol-fueled induced anything. Me too.

59:35Sophia Hagen: Yeah.

59:35Catherine Bohart: You know, as the night, you know, wears on. Goes on, yeah. You know, we don't want any of that. No. I would, you know, maybe three drinks max. Couple glasses. Couple glasses. Yeah. Two, three drinks.

59:45Sophia Hagen: Yeah.

59:46Catherine Bohart: Let's leave it there. Because I know as the night goes on. Yeah.

59:49Sophia Hagen: And the dancing starts.

59:51Catherine Bohart: And she might brush by you.

59:53Sophia Hagen: been up to some you know you might see her and brian say hello you just don't want to be triggered

59:57Catherine Bohart: and then the alcohol induce things which it can do sometimes it can do that um but yeah it's you just gotta fake it but a facade it's one day calm calling collected you're acting you're acting you don't feel that great it doesn't matter you're gonna look it and you're acting yeah you're gonna look it you're gonna look confident and you're gonna look like you got your shit together even though you are stressing a bit but you're gonna look like you're not stressing at all because it's a facade and it's confidence level 10. You just gotta fake it. What did Rihanna say? No, I fake it. What was that line?

1:00:26Catherine Bohart: How do you feel when you're not, oh, I fake it. Oh, pretend.

1:00:29Sophia Hagen: I pretend. Yeah, is that what she said? Yeah. Pretend.

1:00:32Catherine Bohart: Yeah, the question was, how do you, how do you feel confident? How do you confidence all the time? Pretend. If Rihanna pretends, then we can also pretend and just fake it.

1:00:42Sophia Hagen: You got this, Sarah. I won't round up applause because the baby's asleep, but. Baby's sleeping. We'll keep it to a minimal. Right, let's do our star of the week to sign us off.

1:00:50Catherine Bohart: it's one day exactly we can do it there might be a couple more christenings and you've got to

1:00:55Sophia Hagen: remember as well like no one else knows about this all eyes are on the bride eyes aren't on you like just because this is a big thing in your head everyone else who's attending is looking at the bride and the groom they're not looking at the dynamic of the bridesmaids you know so you've got that at least it's not like you're going into a situation everyone knows it's going to be the talk of the town yes it's not no one knows it's old news and no one knows and also like

1:01:19Catherine Bohart: Brian's parents aren't saying it to anyone because they don't want any more attention on their son who's cheated on his girlfriend it's bringing the family name down exactly

1:01:27Sophia Hagen: on the day of the daughter's wedding

1:01:29Catherine Bohart: exactly the Williams name is being dragged through the mud

1:01:32Sophia Hagen: backwards right okay

1:01:36Catherine Bohart: let's um we've got speak positively about the male species now well

1:01:41Sophia Hagen: our actual star of the week is a mum how does that work oh she's up for star of the week sarah that's not quite the rules but i know but ellie's wrote in about her mother story oh this is nice and this is a picture of them and oh they look lovely okay so you know we'll bend the rules for you this week but in future you know it's technically not allowed it's technically about a partner this week i'd love to nominate my beautiful mom for star of the week after 22 years of raising me and my brother as a single mom despite never having a long-term relationship she made sure to always put us first before her own emotional needs she has finally found her true love at 46 and i couldn't be more happy for her they have just moved in together and spent their first new years as a couple her brian has stepped into the role of stepdad for my younger brother and takes care of my mom in the way she truly deserves she is a true queen and deserves this more than anyone i know this just shows that when your time is right it will come and in the meantime do not stress because the universe has its plan for us all.

1:02:44Catherine Bohart: There we go. Look at these two bombshells. Let's see.

1:02:47Sophia Hagen: Mother and daughter at the 40th birthday.

1:02:49Catherine Bohart: So we could find our sermon at 46. Fucking hell. Look at that. Stunners. All right. Shout out to the girls this week.

1:02:57Sophia Hagen: We're very happy for you.

1:02:58Catherine Bohart: Shout out single mums and daughters. True love.

1:03:01Sophia Hagen: And stepdads. Everything's meant to be. All right, guys. Thank you so much for listening to another week of the pod. If you would like an extra episode, you can get one every single Monday over on Patreon. We do bonus episodes every week.

1:03:14Catherine Bohart: We do and you can follow us on Instagram, TikTok and YouTube.

1:03:17Sophia Hagen: And email your dilemmas to hello at thegirlsbathroom.com. We love you so much guys. See you on Wednesday. Bye.