Girl Talk: She's keeping me under SURVEILLANCE

0:00Helen. Oh, Helen. Helen confessed that Steve had said Susan's name during sex instead of hers. Steve, you stupid man. you know the drama is never ending don't let it get the best of you oh whoa whoa whoa welcome back welcome back welcome back welcome back you guys welcome back you guys let's talk with some vocal fry welcome back you guys welcome back to another episode of course with your host With your host, Cinzia. The girls' bathroom. With your hosts, Cinzia and Sophia. Sophia is back today. I feel like our names are actually super, super hard to say. Cinzia. In an American accent. Like, Cinzia.

1:05It's just Cinzia. It needs to be Cinzia in an American accent. They would never say Sophia. They couldn't. Sophia. Oh, they could. Sophia? What's it called when it's like the intonation? What's that word of like the beats of a sentence? Intonation. Yeah. What does that mean? The rise and fall of the voice and speaking. Wow. Thank you. It's spelled I-N-T-O-N-A-T-I-O-N. Right. Intonation. Like the way that you go up and down in a sentence. And like, I feel like our names, Sophia, they don't speak like that. They don't go so... well they do they do sophie sophia so sophia it's just they don't say chinsia and it's chinsia is z because when it's like can i have your email please for the receipt c-i-n-z sorry what sorry sorry what was that c-i-n-z like z z z um yeah no have you seen those pictures of those girls and they're in class and it's like Emily and then and then it's like they're in class and she goes Emily and then she goes she goes I can't remember what it was there she's like alive and kicking oh yeah or she says like you're impressive yeah or she said some funny stuff I don't know I have seen those I can't remember what what else does she say she's just like better than ever yeah yeah better than ever that's it it's just like

2:41oh yeah because what did we say how did they do the register at our schools uh was it yes miss yes here miss yes yes sir yeah so yes sir well in primary school it was good morning alex good morning miss what was our teacher called bellis good morning chintzia good morning miss bellers good morning daniel good morning miss bellers like it was good morning everyone and they would do a little i remember just like cross really like when i was younger all i wanted to do was to fill out the register like getting that red pen in that book yeah and being able to do a little dash like that i just thought oh my god i think that's so bad that must have been before the computers do you know what I mean because like surely these days it's all well sixth form no sorry sixth form secondary school we were on computers but it was a bit more it was a bit it was less friendly you know it was like Millie yes Sarah yes yeah yeah yeah yeah it was better than ever yeah and then I remember actually my mom got me a register my earrings on the floor I lost it when I got home oh my god we found a missing piece of treasure both of them sorry it could stay there accessorize shout out um yeah rachel lee shout out beth lee's mom because she was the secretary at our primary school right right right she got me a register so that i could have my little red pen dream period yeah i used to play teacher oh and mariana's gonna be a teacher mariana's gonna be a teacher i feel like we all went wanted to be teachers yeah well because that was like the the the childhood dream and it was like the job you saw every day yeah you're like that's also bad and like pointing to the whiteboard with a stick yeah and like it's honestly a slay like six weeks off for summer like yeah great holidays how long for Christmas two weeks two weeks Easter half term but then they've got it's a lot of stuff to work mark yeah it's not easy if I was marking I would just I'd whiz over I wouldn't even take it all in dash dash dash I would just say but you would because they're your students and you'd care about them right would you and you'd want them to do well because then it reflects well on you of course you know if all your students are failing you'd be like miss if you mark that yet I am up to my eyeballs you're marking so hire an assistant babes no sorry oh

5:19right should we do the cue of the job yes gosh sorry I forgot where I was for a moment cue of the job please forgive me welcome back everybody happy wednesday okay so let's the weeks are kicking on yeah right for this question of the week yeah let's start by playing this clip okay so our question of the week this week is gotta be tell us your adulthood expectations versus reality so like when you were a child what did you think here we go and like almost picture for yourself in adulthood versus like what actually is adulthood so i think this video there's this clip that was on tiktok and we would have been we were drinking were we 19 you maybe just maybe i was 18 19 so i'm talking like surely i know you weren't 20 no i wasn't 20 and then i think we must have been doing a q a yeah i don't know maybe and it's just like where do you see yourself in five years or something oh maybe we were 20 then maybe yeah and it's like hopefully like settle down like engaged you know like you know with the love of my life like definitely like engaged or something you know anyway listen this is where we thought we were going to be at 25 i mean i would maybe i'd like to be engaged yeah i'd like to be a young mum yeah not not too young don't get me wrong what will the year be in five years it'll be it will be 20 23 oh geez wow yeah i've got 25 think how much we've grown in one year what can five we're gonna be old souls we're gonna be 25 old souls i tell you kids you can picture it now think how much wisdom we will have gathered gathered in our years i think five years i would love to be in a living comfortably in a lovely home yes which is hopefully my own you know yes um i hope i'm happy me too i've got a successful career i'd like to be engaged i think mind you i'll be 24 yeah i think i'd i definitely like to be in the relationship which yeah i'm like well okay we're gonna get married i think it'd be nice to just feel set that okay i think this this person is the one yeah 100 % like engage like you know like that yeah babes you're single so are you 27 you're actually pretty self-doubt so it's like what we were like so we thought at 18 when we thought we thought when we were 18 that we were gonna feel so like I probably thought I was gonna have like two kids yeah and you think 25 is so old old do you think like yeah i'll be pregnant like yeah i've already said that i thought i was gonna be pregnant yeah no i think we did i think it was like maybe like we definitely did something like that yeah yeah yeah because at 18 you think that that is so well you think in the next you think the next year you're gonna meet the love of your life yeah yeah no chance babes right so leading on from that let's see what some of your guys yeah adulthood expectations versus reality and it's like but also like we probably thought at the time at 18 that 30 is so old now we're knocking 30 yeah knock knock knock it's creeping up i do think a lot of that though 30 is so young it's so like i remember seeing pictures of my mum at her 30th birthday.

8:50Yeah. Do you know what I mean? And she's got my two kids. No, but my mum's 30. Yeah. I think it's because when you're growing up, all you really think, like I always remember growing up thinking like, well, I'm just going to do what my mum did. And my mum got married at like 23, 24. Is that when Fiona got married? She might have actually been like 26. But yeah. Fiona, straight down the aisle. Yeah, straight down the aisle. Didn't waste no time. Like she had, she was married and had her kids by the time she was 30. Like 30, that was all, that was done and dusted. So you just think like, oh, well, that's going to be my life too.

9:28I'm probably going to get married at like 24. I have a baby at 26. I probably have a baby at 28. Like job done. I also saw this thing on TikTok that, quote me if I'm wrong, that like we're the first generation of women where we're like living alone, making our own money providing for ourselves not having to rely on a man financially are we the first generation well yeah i'm not sure i don't know but i just that's just what the tiktok said maybe but yeah that more generally we're like yeah because my mom never lived exactly like did your mom live alone she lived i shared flatmates because she went to uni but she never lived alone yeah um my mom's friends didn't live alone so like we're not like we're less um Traditional?

10:12Yeah, like needing a man for that. You know, it's like we're living on our own. We're earning our own money. We're relying on ourselves. Someone's birthed. Because women weren't even allowed to have a bank account up until... Sorry, we're going to have to get all these facts. Sorry, just spreading fake news. When were... In the UK, women were legally able to open bank accounts in their own name and access mortgages without discrimination, in theory, after the passage of the Sex Discrimination Act in 1975. Wow. So otherwise you had to - My mum was born in 1969. Yeah, my mum 1964. So like they grew up in a world where - Margot women - Two kids and she couldn't even have her own bank account.

10:56No, she would have to have had it with - David. David. Grandad. With grandad. Wow. Yeah. So it's like we are - Yeah, so our mums were only allowed, just only allowed to have their own bank account no our mums were always allowed because they were like four yeah but before this married women grandparents yeah isn't that mental yeah like before this married women often needed their husband's permission to open an account wow and single women sometimes single women sometimes face discrimination or needed co-signers like what a load of craziness well these are some of your responses this is a really good one I thought clubbing was so glam was going to be so glamorous yeah because we're watching fucking pussycat doll music videos yeah like in the club you're thinking like you're thinking everyone's like like our own fucking step up like dancing like that like for sure like i could move like that but you can't move and then you see the club photos and you're like what the fuck yeah yeah it's like you haven't even got a seat yeah you stood on your feet for four hours this is me staying up late but now like all i want to do is go to bed at 9 p.m um yeah thinking 30 was going to be like so grown but it's like 30 is the youngest age possible yeah that i'd be married and have kids by 25 i'm 23 single and unemployed yeah i think sparkly lamborghini i take the bus constantly thinking about dinner everything revolves around what's for dinner it's so true yeah how much stuff you think you can buy for a hundred pounds yes yeah because i remember like burphy's like i got a hundred pounds yeah and it was like oh and it was like i've got a hundred pound in cash yeah fucking liquid cash yeah like who needs it yeah right let's see dance battles at parties and in the club oh my god yeah married in house by 25 yeah why did we all have this like 25 marker in the diary because i also think like when we were probably 16 25 sounded grown grown well i think it's because at 16 you feel quite grown yeah well you feel like you got your well you think oh my god by 25 like yeah you feel like you know like what life's about yeah so you've got no clue babes no but i think when you're 17 you go school every day you've got your car you've got a bit of independence you might have a job like you feel like oh my god i'm living in adulthood yeah well yeah you were whipping us around like thinking like six more years i'm gonna be like so grown yeah and especially when you're like used to nights i was like yeah adult yeah i drink yeah like at christmas like i'm having a glass of wine and like it's okay or maybe it's like yeah i was like when you started buying your parents presents yeah for christmas like with your own money with your own money it's like now i have to buy the whole family present i know you I have to spend a dime.

13:48Yeah. Over Christmas time. I'd say, give me some money. Let me get my present. This burden that's been placed on me. Having my own house and having to do all the housework. God, yeah. Yeah, like I used to have chores. And I was like, my whole life's a chore. Whole life's a chore. In the flat. No one's going to do your washing for you. No. No one's going to put the oven on for you. Yeah, no one's going to defrost that chicken for you. If you want to eat tonight, you have to cook. Or you can log on to deliver food as well. But yeah, you gotta spend your own money on food that's it spending your own money on food we never had to buy our own food and the fridge was just full cheese strings baby bells i would get asked like what do you want yeah oh well i'm going to the food shops what should i get oh if you're asking could you get me some of those cheese yeah uh right what else have we got here adulthood expectations versus reality yeah married at 21 the club is not what i imagined yeah the expectation that I'd encounter sinking mud every day.

14:48Sinking mud? What's that? Well, that was just like in all the films, wasn't it? And it was like mud that just like when you sink into it. Oh, really? Yeah. I was just like, we're just going to get muddy. Realizing that no one has their shit together. Yeah, it's quite a comforting thought. Quicksand, that's what sinking mud is. What? Thinking that there's just quicksand everywhere. Choosing what to cook for dinner every night. It can get boring, that. Independence. I wanted it for years and now I hate it. that having a job would be better than school. It's not. Oh, past the king at school. Oh. No, past the king at school was watery.

15:26Genuinely thought I'd be living life in Friends or Sex and the City at 23. Oh. See, that was always the goal, wasn't it? I know, but Friends is still the comfort show. Friends is always the comfort show. But it's the lovely reminder that season one of Friends, they're all like 25. Yes. So if you're like 26, 27, we're only in like season two or three of friends also carrie in season one of sex she was like yeah they're all like 30 year olds they're in their 30s that's like we haven't even started sex in the city yet guys yeah we're doing all right so i think the general consensus is we all thought we were going to be married with babies by 25 some people are some people are you know fantastic they've nailed it yeah absolutely they achieve those dreams absolutely those challenges for the rest of us they've fallen by the way for the rest of us well do I could not imagine having a child at 25.

16:16I know. Like imagine I had a two-year-old. But if you did, you wouldn't know any different. Well, exactly. You'd be so adapted to it. Yeah, it'd be so normal. Absolutely. But imagine we both had two-year-olds. We could. That's us in another universe. I kind of wish we did. Oh my. I think it's because when you're like 17, you think that you're like, no, sorry. When you're just even younger, you don't realize that like you still always feel like you're like 15 years old yeah mentally like it's completely the same yeah you're just a bit wiser like so different you're just a bit wiser you're a bit wiser but you're still the same you still have the same brain yeah it's the same brain for sure but you you've just learned some things i don't know and then it's just like all of a sudden like you've got your own flat yeah and you're just like well responsibility yeah and It's just like, oh, I used to have that room and now I've got a flat.

17:10Right. Well, it is Girl Talk today. So let's see what's in the inbox this week.

17:20Just before we get into it, quick disclaimer. Just to say, we are not doctors. We are not professionals. We do not actually know what we are talking about. This is a lighthearted space. Okay. Don't take what we say literally because we could be wrong. Yeah. And if there's anything serious, if there's anything you feel like you're seriously struggling with, Please contact a GP, a professional, because that is not us. We're just girls, girls and boys just like you, you know? We're just trying to get through life as well. Not professionals. Enjoy the episode.

17:47Okay, right, we're going to be detective. Let's get our detective hats on. I love detective work. And we've got here the next dilemma this week. Is my best friend and her boyfriend secretly spying on me? Interesting. Now, why would they be spying on you? Yeah. Why would they be spying on you, Sarah? Never thought I'd be writing in about my best friend. It's an unusual dilemma to say the least. Buckle up. Okay. We're locked in. Wait, I have no idea whether she would either do I. Let's put some predictions in and then we'll see how accurate it works. Spying. So what could she be getting up to? So either she's seeing a boy that she's maybe not being honest about.

18:32yeah or maybe they're obsessed with you want you to they want to have sex with you and oh wow okay that's took a left turn right not sure or maybe they're trying to show up where you are i'm honestly stumped i i've got no idea okay they want to have sex with you um okay but that's context why would you i don't know or maybe just like when you go on a first date they're just showing up but maybe it's been multiple times maybe it's like come on it's funny the first time ha ha for context i met my best friend over three years ago right okay in my eyes that's a pretty new friend yeah we worked together in the same company for two years right and decided to move in together once uni was over to save on friends me and her and her boyfriend shared a flat that's an interesting dynamic i could never live with another couple i don't think my theory may may be true we've lived together for a year now and have six months left on the tenancy.

19:35Everything has been okay, really, until now. Her and her man have been on the rocks of their relationship for some time. Oh, that's a really uncomfortable environment to live in then for you. To keep it short and simple. I mean, juicy. Yeah. I mean, gossip. Entertaining, I fear, but it's your best friend. But also like not. You wanted to be happy. Yeah. To keep it short and simple, he didn't want to stop smoking and was hiding it from her while she wanted to join the police and she got rejected because of his past which is ultimately put a strain on their relationship what's his past maybe he's got a criminal offense and then she can't be a police officer because of her partner's history maybe he's dealt weed before drugs yeah and then she wants to be a police officer and it's like well your spouse is actually who you live with yeah oh i didn't even think about that for police didn't even know that they would do a background check on a spot but obviously i knew they did a background check on like you but i didn't realize that also included well it's significant others but yeah that makes sense they check your instagram you know it's like when they check your instagram because imagine like if you then got into the police and then you were like undercover for like the biggest like gang lord yeah and you were like the drug lord yeah yeah and you were like his spouse yeah like shredding you know yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah gotta make sure that you know there's no funny business going on oh my god that's gonna destroy a relationship i'm sorry the resent you could never get over that resentment could you she got rejected because of his past which ultimately of course put a strain on their relationship and she was leaning on me for company and advice obviously i told her a man should be supporting her dream career rather than holding her back yes however she didn't listen okay there wasn't much else you know i could do yeah the dilemma oh my god yes so wait when are they stalking you oh my god am i correct neither of us predictable this is gonna be there is a camera in the living area which is obviously shared and communal i do not have access to this camera app they both however have it on their phones oh so you've got a bit of like ring surveillance that people have in their home maybe they've got pets nannies like just like people have it i've seen those tiktoks like some people have them in their bedrooms yeah and it is it is i guess normal for some people yeah and also like if you were ever to be like burgled it's like here's evidence or if you've got kids because you can check it i don't know everyone who lives in the flat should have access to the camera that's just weird in february I was seeing a guy from work.

22:20It was very fresh and he had not met them yet as I wanted to be serious about him before I let him meet one of my best friends. You had sex on the sofa and they watched it on the cameras, 100%. He came round before a work night out together. We had a drink and started kissing and it got a bit heated. I sucked his willy on the sofa and it was on the cameras. Nothing sexual happened. However, it could have been perceived that way from the angle of the camera watching the sofa. Right. I did not. Okay, so you're getting a bit hot and heavy. Even a steamy kiss. Yeah. I did not think anything of this as my flatmates were out with her family.

22:57I received a text from her boyfriend. None of your business. Saying he was showing Sarah's mum the camera app and he saw us having sex on the sofa and to be a bit more careful. oh get out of my life get out of my business also like how dare you survey like you've got surveillance on me he watches you all the time i understand people have cameras in the home but i don't think they need to be like we shouldn't be using them to spy on flatmates no he's really uncomfortable i think he's obsessed with you and like maybe he even got turned on by that obviously this was so embarrassing also you don't show that is so you do not show that around like no no uh-uh also like if i'm like in the house and you're out why do you need to watch that you should only be logging on to watch it if yeah we've been burgled yeah or and that's that's the only instance or you've had like an alarm buzz and you're like oh let me check what's going on the cat is meowed yeah like may bank holiday just gone that's so weird they both admit that he showed them all.

24:11Yeah. It's like I'm watching you. Anyway, sorry. Yeah. May bank holiday just gone. They both went away together and my Brian came over for the weekend to stay with me. We are now official and he has since met them both. Okay. Me and Brian had a date night at home. So I turned the cameras off. Yeah. As I felt like there was an invasion of privacy of, you know, being watched. Yeah. On the Sunday, me and Brian went for drinks, ended up being out all night. When we got home, he passed out in my bed, taking up the entire of the bed so I slept in her bed the next day I made sure it was how it was left how I found it yeah I plugged the camera back in when I knew they'd be home soon yeah on their arrival I was popping out with my brine and received a text from Sarah asking who stayed in her bed and I said me of course nobody else would be there and explain the reason why she complained there were footprints on the floor so I apologized and genuinely did not realize then her boyfriend text me just been to check on the dog and the camera isn't working do you know why oh there's a dog there's a dog I'll admit I did play dumb because I knew for a fact it was plugged in so that means they must have tried to watch the camera while they were away that is so bizarre I denied touching the camera and he said the plug wasn't in which was clearly a lie are they watching me okay so you're thinking like really you should never have known that the cameras were off because you should have had no reason to watch the cameras yes because i was there at home like it's not like we're on holiday and we're checking to see if the house is okay like i'm here so why would you be watching them.

25:52Where's the dog? The dog is at home. Right. So maybe their excuse is like, we're checking on the dog. Maybe, but like, I'm here. But the dog's not home alone. Ask for a picture of the dog. I know they weren't genuinely trying to use the cameras to watch the dog as he is never left alone or in his cage. Like I'm there. Right. I returned home from a city break on Saturday and I found my shower full of dog hair, which wouldn't necessarily be an issue, but the dog would not be able to even fit in my shower as he is quite big and they always use the bath for him so it feels a bit spiteful they've used my shower to clean their dog and not wipe it up oh yeah a little bit yeah that is while i was on my trip away i heard nothing from sarah radio silence no texts no story replies or insta posts likes nothing right this isn't like her so she is clearly annoyed at me or is she avoiding me she's pissed what should i do so we're so so we're living under surveillance under surveillance and i couldn't operate in that way could you operate in that way no i could not operate in that way every time i was sat alone but also like i just want to walk around freely and also it's quite nice like if you do live naked if you're not here if you do live with flatmates it's really nice and often rare to get the flat to yourself so when you do have it to yourself and like you've got your boyfriend coming around I can imagine it's like oh my god this is like our space for the weekend yes I just want to like relax and like go into the kitchen in my pants if I want to yeah and just like chill out and not feel like I'm literally under surveillance imagine that morning after we we'd you know I've been out with my boyfriend we're a bit hungover and I came out in zanyot yeah and we were making some scrambled eggs I'm just chilling and I'm just dancing around and I've got bloody David on the cameras and Mike and fucking motion detector Susan screen recording watching and going look what she's up and passing judgment on you yeah it's fucking weird and they're making passive aggressive comments like why were the cameras yeah and it's like I also live here too it's within my right while I'm here to actually just turn the camera off for a second disabled yeah because like you've already shown Matthew, Mark, Luke and John the video of me snogging my new boyfriend boyfriend which I don't particularly appreciate yeah I know you've been getting a kick out of it Brian and I don't appreciate that the dog in the shower was a that was a left that was just like uh that was a spiteful little like if they've never done that before yeah I couldn't yeah I mean keep on plugging him take him down take him down take him down to Chinatown yeah just turn them off for sure I mean you could I mean how long has she got left six I mean it's weird i mean maybe just keep your guys's canoodling to the bedroom that would i mean i would also just like i would just say like if you do get at like i would just make it a routine that every time you're there alone i would just turn them off and then if you do get asked like why do you turn the cameras off or yada yada yada you just say like well because david keeps going on me i know that you watch them when you're not in and you watch what i'm doing exhibit a you watch me snogging my boyfriend on the sofa like yeah that's weird it's fucking weird David so like I'm gonna turn them on like when I'm out the house but like you're literally watching me I think the next time David says something about the cameras why were they off well David why did you know they were off and David you keep spying on me I think it's weird yeah I would just say it to him back on them because I embarrass him like yeah it's weird yeah you're you're tuning in every time I'm home alone it's a fucking tv show like it's on Bravo like it's fucking big brother like it ain't big brother no like your flat's fine yeah we've got three locks on the door like i'm also in with and it's a tuesday afternoon at three yeah like i'm also here with my big strapping boyfriend like we're all right if there's a robbery i'll let you know yeah i'll turn the cameras back on if there's a fire like i'm sure you'll find out yeah like you do not need to be surveilling me no and i think next time he says he's like well yeah these cameras make me uncomfortable i'm surprised you've lived with the cameras for that long to be honest because well i see those tiktoks of like those couples so do i and they have the camera in the bedroom like so do i maybe they like to watch things back and stuff but like that it's i just fear i couldn't see myself at such an angle i know it's a lot of surveillance the corner just i do appreciate that you'd probably forget they were there yeah if you live if it was just the david isn't david's checking it david's checking yeah this is entertainment he checks it like he checks his tiktok for sure well it's his own little private big brother feed you've only got six months i I think address it.

30:26Next time he says to me - What was the whole backstory about the police thing as well? Yeah, he's just a bit of a weirdo, isn't he? Yeah, she's just prefacing that he's a freak. Yeah. And that he's not a good boyfriend and she's a bit of a weirdo. Yeah. I mean, I do - Oh, I forgot about the police thing. Yeah, this guy's a weirdo. I do. You could just go back to just living the two of you, like the two girls, and then she dumps her boyfriend. But she doesn't want to dump him. Because even after the police thing, she said, oh, and she didn't listen. She just kind of forgive him. I would just get out.

30:50better to live with strangers than surveillance yeah what's she gonna do now she might be with her boyfriend yeah that's true she's got six months left so hopefully you've got some time you know we can speed on through that yeah but I would make it clear that you won't be renewing yeah maybe the surveillance is crazy just try and be stay at your boyfriend's house a bit more yeah that's true and then if they're like why aren't you ever here well you've got fucking cameras on me all the time David yeah I literally feel like I'm in big brother yeah we know that reminds me David's dad David's dad David's my god David's dad David.

31:20David. David. Yeah. So that is. David. Shit's great. You're better. Yeah, that's mental. I could not live with a camera like that. I could not live with other people. And then someone announcing that they've checked on the cameras. That they've watched me. Yeah. I'd be like, when do you, do you always have, are you always watching? It's weird. It's like, are you watching yourself back? That's fucking normal. David is 100 % watching himself back. Watching himself back. Like when he's topless in that. And we go, oh yeah. Let's see how I look from the back. I look good. I look good.

31:56oh we've got pictures attached for this one we appreciate you oh i'd love to have seen a picture of david me too to be fair so sarah here is presenting us with a dilemma and this is a indeed it's giving ross at the aisle oh no he said the wrong name during sex dot dot dot or did he so it was a mumble oh it was a mumble so maybe maybe it slipped out you know when you're trying to cover and you're trying to play it off so it's like Sarah Helen so sexy yeah Sarah you're so sexy I don't I don't know how you would cover that up but he's obviously gave it a go um high gorgeous girls two besties writing in so this is this is a group attempt to figure this out okay let's go Bills been watching you since the Barcelona vlogs in 2016.

32:46Barcelona, dude. That was for my 18th birthday. Yeah, that was when we were chatting all that shit thinking we were going to get married at 25. About then. And we finally have a reason to write in. Please help. We're here. Let's hear it, girls. We need your advice on the weirdest situation. We've never experienced anything like it. I've never experienced this. Neither have I. No. I would cry. I would never be able to recover from that. Yeah, it would be weird. Have you ever called someone? Have you ever called it would hit me deep have you ever called a boyfriend the wrong name you know just like David oh sorry Matt and it's like David's your ex no have I I don't think I have actually I've had a boyfriend call me a different girl's name speak on it how did that make you feel when I was at work.

33:38Oh my God. I used to work with my ex-boyfriend and it was very early stages and he'd sort of had a fling. How could we forget? With another girl at work. How could we forget? We'll never forget. He had a fling with another girl from work. Sexual endeavours. Sexual endeavours. And then. But didn't take her seriously. But then wanted to take you seriously. right yeah and obviously he was used to call Sophia was new to work he was used to calling down I've been about a year in all right but yeah we had similar names they started with the same letters let's say her name was Sarah absolutely and we were on the shop floor Sophia Sarah I mean they actually they're similar and he looked at me it was kind of we were still early stages we weren't boyfriend and girlfriend but it would become entangled we were serious and he said to me oh sarah can you go and get that um and it was like a pin drop yeah and the other staff because the other staff knows it was yeah crime gossip you know it's quite a small group of us we're all at the same age and um yeah it was not good you fucking what you fucking what how fucking daggy it's like people went making it worse one of those situations and she was also working that day as well don't rub it in guys yeah yeah and that happened to me once okay to be honest I actually wasn't that affected that's good because I still wasn't that into him yet because it was early stages yeah but I do remember feeling like embarrassed and feeling like this is awkward because like also like everyone at work because now like and she's fucking downstairs.

35:26Well, she would have been. And now I'm just like and also like She would have felt on top of the world unfortunately. But she never found out. Well, she probably did to be fair. But yeah, it was embarrassing. Because I also it was a weird situation because she was older than me and I was like this young like I was like 18 and I was like oh, like she's got so much on me, you know. And I was like oh God, how embarrassing. But I've never called he was very apologetic to be honest. That's good. But I've never done it in reverse. No, I don't think I have. But I can see, listen, actually, not to come to this Brian's offence, I could see how it is a slip of a tongue.

36:02Me too. But then in my mind, I'm thinking, well, you've been thinking about her. I know. You've been thinking, you know, if the name's at the forefront of your mind, then you've been thinking, Why is it there? You know? Sometimes it's just habit. I would spiral. But during sex is, that's, like lock in. Yeah. Focus. Focus. Like where the hell is your mind wandering? Who the hell are you here with? Exactly. who are you fantasizing about yeah like that like yeah but especially if we're in the darkness you wish i was helen then right yeah like you're thinking about helen right yeah it wouldn't end well i'm sure he wouldn't feel good oh matt and it's like my name is david yeah it's not even similar yeah like that's not gonna feel nice is it no so we graduated from uni nearly two years ago in our third year we lived in a shared house with five friends two of them let's call them steve and susan we're especially close where is this going where's this going so steve and susan were especially close we all live together but we all thought it was pure a purely a platonic friendship steve had a long-term girlfriend of about seven years let's call her helen but she didn't live with us steve and susan was sometimes did not like you lot steve and susan was sometimes stay up late chatting after the rest of us had gone to bed i'm sure let's get those cameras but nothing yeah literally we all know what you're getting up to but nothing ever steamed off we just thought they were really close mates oh god so is this about them maybe steve and suz fast forward about a year ago we were all on a night out our whole uni house plus steve's girlfriend helen oh helen's come down for the girls helen is invited it's not like steve's hiding helen away which is good yeah that's really good.

37:42I bet Helen's going to make sure she looks really good that night. So she should. She's got to mark her territory. At one point, imagine going to visit your boyfriend. And his new girl best friend. And his new four girls that he lives with. Yeah. That'd be tough. You know, being 20 years old. At 20. At the right impressionable age of 19, 20. You'd make sure you'd be planning that out And your boyfriend's already started acting a bit off with you. Yeah. He's already a bit cold. And he sort of said, you can come if you want. And you thought, well, yeah, because I need to see the vibes here. He's made you buy your own ticket for the event.

38:19Do you know what I mean? Yeah. He's made you buy your own train to get there as well. He's not even met you at the station. And you just know it's on its way out, but it's like you're still trying to cling on. You're trying to cling on. It's actually a horror film. And then you're looking at Sarah and you're thinking, are you the reason? Really, it's not Sarah's fault, but at 19, you think it is. It's a hard age. These men. Anyway. You know, like he's never met a Scottish girl, you know, Susan. Right. And he said, these guys have some flair. Yeah. You know, something about Susan. Yeah. Meanwhile, Helen, seven years deep.

38:51Poor thing. Anyway, we're getting ahead of ourselves. So at one point, Susan and Helen went to the bathroom because Helen was really drunk. Drinking her sorrows away. Drinking sorrows away. Liquid courage. When Susan came back, she told us that Helen had broken down crying. Poor Helen. Helen has been going through it I know she has Helen's been suffering like Steve you know like when Steve and Susan have been up talking late at night Helen's been waiting for a FaceTime Helen's not got a text back Helen's been waiting five hours for a FaceTime and she didn't even get to say goodnight to her boyfriend he didn't even say goodnight love you and all Helen's left with is her imagination about these four gorgeous girls and then his excuse is sorry I was working I was doing my essay sorry Susan just needed me to come for her she was really upset meanwhile on Susan's story everyone's making s'mores that night Steve's in the back you see him laughing you see him smiling oh the rage and it's like he didn't even tell me they were making smiles no he left that out yeah like oh poor Helen I can actually feel her pain so can I the withdrawing of her boyfriend and you're trying to claw them back yeah there's nothing worse than that when those texts start to change and you're thinking what something's off something's different but then and now I'm just in a bad mood but then it takes a while and then the light switch just goes off.

40:07You say, yeah, I don't deserve this. I'm out. So Helen's just broken down crying and confessed that Steve... Oh, oh, oh, oh. Helen is having a rough time. Oh my God. Has Steve said Sarah when having sex with Helen? Helen. Oh, wait. Helen confessed that Steve had said Susan's name during sex instead of hers. Steve you stupid man poor Helen is a good woman oh my oh my god so Susan is saying this to you guys Susan's probably like what the like poor Susan's like Susan's knocks for six and we were speechless Helen was mortified imagine being in the bathroom you're drunk with Susan I'm fucked and I'm here Susan she seems really nice which pisses me off even more and it's like you guys have a good relationship like she's lovely this is the my boyfriend said this girl's name in bed what's going on that I don't know about the past three months he's not been acting the same and she's got massive fucking pictures like tonight he said yeah come if you want you know you're just thinking oh my god and you try to reconnect you have some sexy time and you're thinking Sarah tell me something please like I can't get anything out of him I actually feel sick sorry let me oh my god we were speechless Helen was mortified and clearly heartbroken she apparently left the club not long after where is Steve where is Steve like Steve keeping his mouth fucking shut for once I hope Helen deserves better than this Helen poor Helen poor Helen Helen needs a good time at Magic Mike to let loose for goodness sake we all felt so awful for Helen and just couldn't believe Steve had done that well yeah because as far as you guys are concerned Steve and Susan are just good friends yeah you're not questioning the platonic steve's in love with helen it's been seven years like you genuinely just thought they were good yeah good mates yeah susan was quite upset as she felt like she had lost steve as a friend and couldn't look at him the same okay so susan doesn't see steve in that way at all she's like actually you'll make her feel sick the fact that you're maybe thinking about me during sex it's like we're just mates and also maybe it's one of those instances where like sometimes it's really maybe it was really nice for sarah to have that friendship with steve because he had a girlfriend and it was like i know this is just platonic because you're in love you've been in love for seven years like it's so nice that you know we have this friendship and there's no like second guessing about what this is because you're not trying to kiss me yeah so she was actually probably like maybe she was really almost like heartbroken that oh wait yeah this wasn't the dynamic that maybe i thought well yeah because now susan's like oh i've lost my friend now because it's not the same it's like now we potentially fancy me and you and i didn't think that was what was happening and now you've like ruined your relationship because you were thinking about me like now we can't be friends yeah so susan has always reassured us she had zero feelings for steve and felt bad she'd accidentally given him the wrong impression for context susan is naturally quite a flirty person and even says most of her male friends end up catching feelings for her okay so susan's got the alia so susan's like oh this has happened before maybe you know these boys can't be mates with me because of my alia they love it over time we came to the conclusion that he must have had secret feelings for susan yeah yeah i mean you know i mean he could have just said it by accident but it's a bit in his mind a hundred percent he was fantasizing about Susan 100 % yeah he was putting so much effort into that that's a really specific time to get a name wrong like yeah you can't recover from here and there but like in the bedroom in the bedroom you really can't recover from that especially when Helen's probably been feeling the way she's been feeling like yeah away like yeah 100 % I know how he's been acting the last few months it's giving like your mind's wandering yeah it kind of made sense given how close they were it wasn't completely out of the blue since then our friendship group hasn't stopped talking about it i mean that's prime yeah i've been down on this for a long time it's it's prime discussion points unfortunately for helen and susan and steve uh for a whole year every time we've hung out as a group a year oh my god guys we've been low-key watching their dynamic and analyzing their every move so what happened still it's still did helen and steve recover i we've not we've not been told after that night out things just resumed as normal oh helen oh we hung out as a group with and without helen there and everything seemed normal like nothing had ever happened okay we all thought they would break up over it and were surprised that helen was being so chilled about the situation like letting steve still see susan without her there but we never spoke to steve or helen about this as it felt too personal just to get involved here's where it gets messy oh my god there's more there's way more oh my god oh my god we've got oh my god i can't get ahead of myself i think we've got a picture of of steve here's where it gets messy recently susan's been caught lying about a few things to do with her new boyfriend okay so susan's got a boyfriend stuff like his age and job are they secretly going out nothing that directly affects us but has made us question how honest she actually is so eventually after so much speculation we decided to ask steve directly about what happened about what what are they like secretly dating and he was completely shocked he swore it never happened what what what never happened what the wrong name the sex thing the wrong name yeah he said he may have said susan's name by accident of course the dilemma is or did he oh okay so what okay so susan you were chatting about susan And all she's lied about these few things.

46:09He thought, oh, let's just ask Steve about him saying... So you're thinking that Susan could just come back from the bathroom with Helen and fabricated that whole thing. Well, no, because Helen... Helen said it. To Susan? Did she even say it? Susan's a liar. Susan's a fabricator. So Helen was just crying about something else. Was she even crying? Oh, yeah, we didn't even see Helen. We didn't even see Helen. She left. Are we all locked in? We all concentrated because this is getting a bit complex. Yeah, I'm locked in. Okay. our Sarah here writing in has gone to Steve he was completely shocked he swore it never happened he said he may have said Susan's name by accident at some point but definitely not during sex he also insisted that he's never had feelings for her ever now we're totally thrown did Susan make the whole thing up?

46:57why? was she trying to stir drama? did she maybe like Steve herself and wanted attention? we honestly don't understand what the motive could be this is a whole this is a whole other story 180 flip we were going we spent so many hours literal evenings talking with her about it giving her advice comforting her comforting susan naturally we are closer to susan as we live with her so we spent a long time talking to her about it yeah and now we feel kind of betrayed like what else has she lied about oh because so is it actually confirmed she's lied then well if she has it's quite hard to fake such a like when you ask steve and he was like you are like what like yeah because you fear that obviously felt very genuine from Steve to be like I never want because also like you fear that Steve would be like oh my god yeah that was like a year ago wasn't it me and Helen like we got through let's not speak about it you would kind of say that I guess yeah you wouldn't deny because it's like well if it was because it's like we know I'm not asking you if I'm asking you like how did that go because like we could go to Helen and she would go yeah Steve like you broke my heart that night yeah but then it's obviously like if we were to go to Helen she'd be like no we need to go to Helen now we feel betrayed like what else has she lied about if she has lied about such boring things like her boyfriend's age and job then is she just a compulsive liar she's been a close friend of ours for years so it feels like such a shame for this to be a breaking point but at the same time how do we move forward knowing she's fabricated something so big and wasted all of our time thinking about something that never even happened that's if she has lied about that if she has lied about that she just wanted to break them up that's the that's maybe she's that's the motive tension yeah like maybe she just wanted a bit of drama to kick off like maybe she was a bit bored well the expense of helen's feelings that's horrendous i know well it but what else what else what why she didn't even no but helen was to be in crime about something else was helen even crying we don't know right of course the plot thickens right so yeah she she yeah because she didn't even like speak to Steve about it bizarre yeah do we confront her and say we know it's not true do we just distance ourselves or do we act like it never happened and try to move on Susan brings it up in conversation quite a lot saying things like did you notice Steve ignoring me tonight or Helen keeps giving me dirty looks or being rude to me right I think it sounds like Sarah just wants to a bit of attention I think she wants a bit of like like, you know, a bit of something juicy to talk about and something to go over and over and over and over.

49:34And she's just kind of like, possibly made up this whole situation. So like you guys, because I mean, maybe she feels like she's not as close with you guys. So she's trying to like bond over something like, you know, to try and really get like, because talking about boys and relationships, that is really bonding in like female friendships. So maybe she's trying to be like oh let's talk about this and get yada yada yada yada yada and she's just made this like weird story up and i don't really understand why neither because what the motives are but i would call her out yeah i say sarah i wouldn't call her out but i would almost go like sarah we have to tell you something we have to tell you something yeah so it was so weird but we play it like steve the other night and it somehow came up about that whole thing when he said your name during and like steve didn't said said like that never happened like steve said that like don't go in accusing her but just be like to discuss it and you know that steve's got no memory like should we just get steve in here and we can like have it out with him you know almost go like that route and then she'll be like oh no no no no no no no no let's not do that blah blah blah but like i would plant the seed that like steve's denying it steve's got no recollection steve's got no memory and it makes sense that steve will go to helen go guess what fucking what's the name said she said that i said that obviously we that ever happened did it no no no no no that's why helen is steve is ignoring me tonight and helen keeps giving me dirty looks like being rude to me yeah but yeah because you're making up lies susan wants to be this topic of conversation she wants to be the the discussed one i fear so would it be hard to continue to to pretend we don't know the truth when it's being brought up like every time we hang out she loves the topic she loves talking about it yeah because she wants to feel like she's being desired by yeah she wants to feel like she's like the center of the group maybe yeah she wants to feel like yeah like people are talking about me like she likes that that's some people's worst nightmare but some people love it we also don't see each other that often now that we have graduated oh so i don't think everyone's living together anymore right she's a bit intense usually plan weekends to hang out around one of our houses so seems an awkward environment to confront her as we'd have to spend the whole weekend with her have attached pictures as we know you love it first pick is steve and helen right let's look at steve and helen first second pick is susan and and the third is others oh right this is susan i mean a beautiful young lady blonde bombshell She looks beautiful.

52:14She looks fantastic. Where's the happy couple? Happy couple. You're not ready for the happy couple. You're not ready for the happy couple. Oh my God. Poor Steve. Honestly, he's been going through it. Steve and Helen. Oh, Steve and Helen. Oh, bless these guys. No, no, this isn't Helen. Oh yeah, this is Helen. Yes, Helen. Helen, we love Helen. Gorgeous girl. They're like such a nice couple. Steve, bless him. His face, his face, everything. He looks knackered. Steve does not look like the person to say Steve's name during sex that's for sure he is locked in on Steve knows what he's got with Helen yeah he absolutely does and he's gonna hold on tight Steve let's see the girls we're hanging in and this is our ladies the authors themselves beautiful girls yeah the novelists themselves gorgeous ladies gorgeous girls yeah I mean sometimes when you catch out this is a complex web yeah it's weird that's been going on for years it's random it's weird it's a bit unnecessary I just think I don't really understand why like she's kind of white lying, not even white lying, just like lying for no reason.

53:16Like, I don't really understand it. But I think sometimes when you catch a friend lying or someone lying, like I would take more of the stance of like, I don't really need to call you out. Like, I know you've lied. I know you're lying. Like whatever. I'm not going to, I don't need to call you out and get you to tell me why you're lying. Like it's enough for me just to know that like, I know that's how you moved. And like, that was weird. Like, I'm just going to note that in my log I don't know whether you like you could definitely confront her and be like Stephen saying it's not right but then it's like sometimes it's just like knowledge is power I know what I know now I know that was false like that was a bit weird like you're not a truther you're not a truther and maybe that's all it this needs to be because I feel like bringing it all I mean I don't want to keep talking about this all over again like it's been two years at this point and then poor Steve and Helen like they've done nothing they've done nothing I feel bad for them at the being at the centre of this gossip but then they don't even know it seems it seems well they know now Steve no I mean maybe I mean do you chat to Helen?

54:21do you say Helen? yeah why don't we ask Helen? like Helen do you remember that one night back in fucking 2018? yeah three years ago do you remember that? we're all still talking about it by the way do you remember that one night I mean maybe say what happened what was your turn of events because that night I know we've never discussed it with you but that night Sarah told us no Susan told us that you said that you said that Steve said Susan's name during sex and that you were devastated and she's spoken about it for three years and like we've discussed it for years and years and I thought you guys were over it but apparently never I would talk to Helen if you want to get to the bottom of it Helen's the answer then is it Helen and Steve's kind of not duty but then it's then they know all the information and they can present it to Susan and be like Susan what the fuck you spread in false you know that was a lie and then it's kind of their job instead of you guys having to do it.

55:08Yeah. Because you're, you know? Yeah. Because I feel like Helen should know what's been spoken about. I know. Like, poor Helen. Like, we've been analysing their relationship for years because of this one thing that maybe never happened. Yeah. Yeah. So talk to Helen because I feel like you guys have a good relationship with Helen. I feel like she would be like - Yeah, she's out. She's on the night. If it happened, she would go, oh yeah, that did happen. Steve obviously just was denying it. Yeah. So maybe she'll be like, she'll say, yeah, it did happen. Can we not talk about it? Fine. Okay. Susan wasn't lying or she'll go what?

55:36and then you'll be like fuck we've got confirmation that it never happened that's mental Susan's a fabricator I mean what an elaborate lie unnecessary as well in the hopes of them breaking up in the hopes of what? but I think she wanted them to break up but it didn't work out but how would how would that how would they have broken up over that because both of them knew that it was a lie yeah well then she just wanted to be tried about to talk about with you girls she wanted drama to talk about yeah she wanted to be the center of the gossip yeah she wanted to make herself feel like someone that had a girlfriend wanted her yeah to make herself feel good even though it was all a lie in her head unless it wasn't and steve's lying but yeah it's so it's a strange it's just because i would go to helen guess what i know it's been three years helen i'm sorry we've not brought this to you soon just been going round and round for a while yeah but yeah but just in terms of susan's behavior log it note it that's what i mean just kind of know that you probably can't really trust her with information or like don't really gossip about your life because you don't know what she's telling other people exactly you don't know what what you know who else she's chatting to or like and i would take everything she says i guess with a great assault but maybe she's just a friend to like have a boogie with you know yeah just a going out friend like maybe she's not like a deep advice life talks yeah friend you know what i mean

57:05okay last one here i have feelings for my best friend but so does she susan susan and helen back at it again now susan's emailed in okay hey girls yeah avid wednesday pod listener here for years. Thank you, Sarah. We love you both. You get me through my commute home from uni. Oh, thank you, Sarah. Bit of a long one. Honestly, I never really thought I'd have to write in, but alas, here I am. Alas. So a bit of a backstory. I am 23 and in the past, maybe five years, I've developed a super close group of friends, a mixture of girls and guys. We see each other most days of the week and I love them all to bits.

57:45In particular, I have a really close friendship with one of the guys. We'll call him Brian. The group always joked that me and Brian are the mum and dad of the friendship group. You know, we'd laugh. It was just part of our dynamic. Brian and I have always had this flirty, bantery relationship. And at times we've been quite touchy and affectionate with each other, but it's always been platonic. Then last December at our friendmas celebration, something felt a little different. Brian and I ended up outside taking a break from the chaos. It was freezing, so he pulled me into his jacket. He made some stupid joke, like, can't have my co-parent freezing to death.

58:27I rolled my eyes, but let him pull me in. It was comforting. We stood there in silence for a second. And when I turned his fire back - His heart was beating. His heart was beating out of his chest and your knees were going weak. When I turned to fire back with something sarcastic, he was already looking down at me. There was this pause and then he leaned in and we kissed. It wasn't planned. It wasn't dramatic. It just happened. And for a second, it felt great. What do you mean? Just for a second. Then panic hit. I muttered something about being tired, said my goodbyes and left. We never spoke about it.

59:08we didn't tell anyone and somehow nothing felt weird between us so i convinced myself that it didn't need a dressing we were drunk i didn't want to change anything especially not our friendship or the group dynamic but wait a second that was not a drunken kiss a drunken kiss is like that was sweaty people were sloppy we're dancing it's busy it's dark light it's flashing and that's a drunken kiss yeah that that's an intimate being pulled into the chest into the jacket snuggled in looked out upon. Yeah, like that. That's intimate. But Sarah, how do you feel? How does that make you feel? I think we're going to find out.

59:47So she didn't feel the need to address it. You were kind of avoiding it. But after that night, every time I saw him, this feeling kept growing that maybe there's something more here. And I think without meaning to, I started developing a bit of a crush, but still I kept quiet. I was very aware of the group dynamic and not wanting it to change. Fast forward a few weeks, one of the girls introduced a new friend to the group. Let's call her Sarah. Oh no, I feel sick. She was bubbly, outgoing. Of course. Confident and very quickly slotted herself into our group. And Brian's pants, I think, by the sounds of things.

1:00:27Oh no, no, no, Brian, Brian, Brian. Like seamlessly. And within about a week, Sarah had already told the girls and I that she was interested in getting to know Brian. Let's just all take a deep breath because this is actually making me feel really sick and sad. You're thinking she is so fucking nice and I fucking hate it. The bubbliness. The confidence. Not a care in the world. She's making a new group. Who and what she wants. We can't fault her. But Sarah, Brian is in love with you over here. Come on. your mum and dad come on she confided in me no no not me asking questions about him since she knew how close we were naturally the girls and i hyped her up i would make encouraging her to go i was like i think he yeah i don't think he'd be into you yeah i think he's gay i think he's into men yeah naturally the girls and i hyped her up encouraging her to go for it then out of nowhere Sarah turned to the group oh no and said I'm so glad that you're okay with this Susan because I was a little worried that you and Brian might have been a thing ha ha ha ha ha ha ha oh I'd be screaming so you're just thinking now I should have just made it known I should have just made it known you know and then she would have backed off because she respects women I was here first fuck what did I do?

1:01:55I panicked I just laughed and started rambling saying we're just good friends were like siblings. I have no idea why you'd even think that. I was definitely doing too much. Meanwhile, you dream about that kiss every night. Oh no, Sarah, this is... Not long after that, I went away on a trip for a few weeks. And while I knew the group was still hanging out, all I could think about was whether Sarah was making a move on Brian, which I know I literally said was fine with but deep down I really wasn't I was so confused so I did what any rational person would do and completely ghosted Brian yeah absolutely I ignored his messages even though he was checking in to see how my trip was I thought if I ignored him maybe my feelings would go away spoiler alert Sarah I feel you and Brian were lovers in a past life and it's just your souls are connected my soul's known you for a thousand my soul's known you for a thousand years when I got back home Brian called me clearly concerned yeah why I'd been distant he asked me if we could go for coffee and while I initially said yes I spent ages trying to think ways out of it but I ended up going good at coffee he straight up asked me why I've been so distant and what was wrong tell him you love I panicked again and deflected saying I've just been thinking about a lot of things then out of nowhere I blurted out so how have you been anything happening with you and Sarah?

1:03:23Brian looked completely confused and said, he doesn't want Sarah. Why does everyone keep saying that? He just said like an idiot. I told him that Sarah had mentioned she was interested. I know not my business shouldn't have meddled, but I was frustrated and needed to know what was going on. Yeah. So without thinking, I asked him, so are you interested in Sarah? Yeah. He said something like, no, what? I mean, I don't know. I guess I haven't really thought about her that way i mean she's cool don't say that she's cool what do you mean i haven't thought about it oh she's oh and for some reason that answer really got to me yeah i don't know why but i suddenly felt like i needed to push him towards sarah this is so i started talking her up no i feel way over the top saying how amazing she was and that he should totally go for it is overcompensating Sarah because he's also he's giving you the chance he's to be like I'm not interested he kissed you but but yeah this is all this is a mess okay so we changed the subject left the cafe and after that things between us just felt weird I distanced myself from Brian and the rest of the group because I was just a bit thrown oh no um until the other day Brian called me Thank God Completely out of the blue Thank God, thank God And said I miss you Thank God I really need to see you Thank God He lives with some of the other guys in the group So I asked if anyone was home He said they were out watching football So I decided to go over And have a chat Thank God It was so awkward at first I had no idea what he wanted to say And then he kept asking Why I thought he and Sarah were a thing Because he wants you to say He Yeah He wants you to say You're both kind he wants that like moment from you yeah because he's been like why did you think we're a thing like we're a thing yeah you know but it's like say it yeah yeah yeah right we had a couple of glasses of wine which loosened things up and soon enough we were back to our usual dynamic banter laughter being close and then completely out of nowhere here we go he hit me with i'm not interested in sarah Oh my God.

1:05:38So you're fucking about time, Brian, you idiot. He basically said he only wanted to talk to me about it because he didn't understand why I kept trying to push them together. Okay. At least he, you know, didn't fall for it. Yeah. You know? We sat in silence just looking at each other. I felt like, I felt like I felt something. Yeah. And I swear in my head, I was screaming like, take me right now. Like, let's go. Yeah, let's go. But of course, before anything could happen, Sarah and some of our other friends walked in with Brian's roommates perfect timing just my luck god the energy was charged shit everyone was excited to see me because I've been a little MIA and then as if the situation couldn't get any messier no no no someone made the joke again oh mum and dad waiting for the kids to come home oh Sarah and the other girls pulled me aside to catch up trying to see if Brian had said anything about her to me oh fucking hell this is actually so Sarah's like did he say anything about me?

1:06:36like has he even changed me? and it's like babes he's in love with me I dodged it and just said no we didn't talk about you we were just catching up on our own lives I also threw in I don't want to get in the middle of you guys it's really not my business at this point I feel like I'm living a double life I usually pride myself on being a loyal honest person I don't even know what I'm doing anymore so here's where I'm at does Brian maybe feel the same way about me? I think that it's clear that he does Sarah it's clear and he was just waiting for like a green he's trying to let you know like i don't like sarah yeah so like if you're being cold with me because you think i'm moving on sarah i'm like i'm not yeah it's just like both of you were in this friendship yeah you were stuck in the friendship you know with the whole group being around and all of this and you're still in the friendship you are and it's so hard to break free of that because it's like once one of us says it this friendship is no longer like it's really hard to go back to how as being just friends and it's like he's treading carefully you're clearly treading really carefully trying to push you know sarah you know to try and mask how you're feeling um girl code wise like have i gone this about this the wrong way like what am i supposed to do um am i overthinking everything hell i think honestly that what how you've handled this would have happened to me and Sophia.

1:07:58Like, that is a really tough, like, that is so tough. So look, you had the passionate kiss. Yeah. You'd never looked at me in that way before, it seems. The next day - A light bulb went off. Yeah, a light bulb, oh, fucking hell. Like, now I'm crushing on you, but like, you've not said anything to me. Yeah. So like, I'm not going to say anything to you because why would I? Why would I? Like, you kiss me. Like, new girl comes in. But then she was just fine at saying, oh, it's just a drunken kiss. It's just a drunken kiss. New girl. New girl comes in. Typical. Gorgeous. typical lets it known makes it known yeah i really like brian typical and you're thinking oh of course you fucking do fucking fantastic um yeah i mean it is tricky because i feel like you do genuinely like sarah and sarah is a part of this girl group now she's nice and she's lovely that is really hard when like she's literally coming to you saying like has he said anything about me and then you're thinking well now I feel like a fucking bitch because like I'm like when this all comes out you're gonna feel so embarrassed I know that you've been confiding in me like I because I would feel the same like imagine confiding in a new girl like you're a new girl in this group and you've chosen one girl specifically to confide in about your crush and then you find out you're gonna feel like a just a slap in the face I know so so how so how we're gonna handle this because you and brian you and brian can't slip away like you guys like you need to consummate this consummate the marriage yeah like this needs it does need to happen it's written in the stars and the souls sarah needs to be dealt with yeah don't mean murder her all right her feelings need to be managed exactly because right now she's fantasizing about you know as we do fantasizing dreaming hoping wondering well yeah because in sarah's world like she's got this new great friendship group everyone thinks there's a new guy in the group that she fancies sarah's going to sleep at night making stories up in her head about her and brian so it's going to be a bit of a reality check for her when you tell her that you've also got feelings so maybe i mean how far do we girl code this what do you mean should neither of you be with Brian?

1:10:07How close is Sarah to you? I didn't even consider that. No, her and Brian are, that was just, that was just, because you could have said back then, look, we do actually have a thing. But you didn't know he felt it either. You were trying to mask your feelings. I don't think that means that you don't have to be, that you shouldn't be with Brian. At the end of the day, Brian and her haven't even talked one-on-one at this point. Well, they might have. Well, they might have, but maybe not. without the group. Do you know what I mean? I feel like he's not really given her much. Unless he has. Unless he has.

1:10:43So what we're going to do is, what we're going to do is, we're going to invite Sarah for coffee. Okay. We have to chat. To Sarah? We have to. What are you going to say? You can't just snog Brian and go, sorry. What are you going to say to Sarah? I'm going to say, Sarah, I'm so, I'm like, I feel sick. I feel sick. I can't even finish my drink. I can't even finish my drink, but I need to tell you something. before you join the group be honest all you can do is paint the picture give her the context before you joined the group Amir three months ago me and Brian we were at Matt's house and we shared a beautiful kiss not to rub it in your face Sarah I'm so sorry but he's such a good kisser and his tongue was warm and soft honestly if only you could get the chance to yeah sorry sorry back to the story Sarah but we shared a kiss and I was confused I didn't know what I wanted but I knew deep in my soul that it was Brian however when you entered I was trying to mask my feelings and I was trying to push the agenda of you and Brian because I wasn't sure I didn't think Brian liked me and I wasn't sure I didn't want um our friendship to be ruined by this kiss but really it was just a start of our beautiful love story but unfortunately you came in and I tried to push the the your two's narrative unfortunately that's not what the souls want that's not what the stars want they won't let me they won't let me unfortunately me and Brian are destined and I'm really sorry you're finding out this way but I just wanted to come to you first no one knows no one in the group knows right but I just wanted to let you know that Brian likes me and he said he doesn't like you no we can't say that and now she hates you no but you just say we had that kiss I'm so sorry I didn't know how I feel, but it turns out I feel something.

1:12:33Before you really rock this dynamic of the group, I need a bit more from Brian. I guess. Like, I think you need to actually figure out, do you want to date Brian? Or do you just have like, like, has this just been a bit of like, oh, he's the boy in the group. Oh, there's a bit of chemistry. Like, oh, blah, blah, blah. It's more. Do you actually want to date him? We do. Are you in love with, maybe not in love with him yet, But like, before I tell anyone that Brian likes me, Brian chose me. I need to fucking hear it from Brian's mouth that he is actually choosing me. Because so far, all I've heard from Brian is, I miss you and she's cool.

1:13:17He actually did say that. Who the fuck did? Yeah. I know, but he said, he said, I don't like Sarah. He said that. Great. I don't fucking like licorice sweets. I need you to tell me that you like me. does Brian need to tell Sarah I don't like you is it Brian's job or is it or is it our girl's job no it's Brian's job to let me know how he feels about me because at the end of the day you are a woman who is questioning how he feels about you and you should never be questioning she's right how a man feels about you she's right Brian should be letting you know but it's only because he's been struggling to make the jump from friends to lovers but he does need to let you know but he's been struggling but he needs to get on it now time is ticking yeah the ovaries and i just think he i understand that there's a bit of trepidation you know it's like oh the friendship dynamic yeah yeah but like we've kissed at this point you've met me for coffee and you've been alluding to the fact that sarah and we're getting a bit cuddly we're getting a bit close my mom and dad and all this yada yada yada like because at the end of the day like what i just don't want is for like sarah is new to the group we said she's so she's bubbly she's slotted in right away like sarah could be an invaluable friend to you yeah right and what i just don't want to happen is for you to be like really you know i think shit on a friendship with sarah yeah for a boy that is still at that you're not even like we're not even really that sure like i need concrete proof from brian i want brian to like express his love to me and tell me that I don't want to be just friends anymore.

1:14:56Like I think you're gorgeous and I've admired you for so long. And I just love everything about you. And yes, like I've been a bit like, oh, you know, I don't want to ruin our friendship, but I just can't let this go. And like, I want to date you. And like, I can't hold this in any longer. I need confirmation from Brian that we are going down a romantic path. Yes, it might not work out. Yeah, we can't guarantee that we're going to be together forever but before i break one of my female friendships i need to know that this is going somewhere because so far all you fucking told me is that you don't like sarah and that she's cool yeah because also like have you even told sarah you don't like her no actually but also like you know but tell me you like me tell me you like me yeah i don't need you to tell Sarah that you don't like her unless you've been leading her on whilst I haven't been here unless you've been texting unless you've been maybe they have maybe they have maybe them snapchatting like we don't actually know like maybe Sarah's not got this crush out of nowhere oh god maybe Sarah's been having a bit of yippy yippy he's got a flirty relationship with you what say he's not got a flirty relationship with Sarah oh god yeah we need I just need more from Brian before I Brian needs to step up to the plate my female friendships Sarah Brian needs to step up to the plate so maybe let's have another coffee fucking hell i'm caffeinated up and you know you say like look come on what's the fucking deal here mate all right mate it's like you're wasting my time you're wasting sarah's time i actually yeah and you and you maybe try and be a bit more like what is going on i want him to tell us how do we get him to tell us he likes us but we shouldn't why are we begging for that absolutely not absolutely not so so ignore him no no because you pushed him away too far and he did come back he was like i'm like where are you i miss you you came back with sarah's cool i need more but then he did come back again and said come right come around like you've been cold and distant yeah and then you told me that you don't like sarah okay because this is tough because no one else in the group knows anything do they not no no so it's not even like it can be like come on David hint yeah he needs to step up come on it's like it's like this is just me and you now yeah it needs to be dealt with this month in June because we need to put a timeline on this yeah because this can't we can't be reaching up knocking on October Halloween nights out and because I am a bit worried about Sarah the other girl I'm worried about Sarah too David no Brian needs to sort his shit out be honest face how you feel and tell me you freak yeah how do you get Brian to tell you how you how he feels then you can at least establish your guys's relationship and like feelings do we need to get another guy in the mix for who for our girl for Sarah no for for our girl who's kissed Brian no like oh I'm going on a date well no one else has asked me on a date recently but then Brian then I fear he's obviously struggling with his emotions I'm not your fucking babysitter though i know i just think she's trying she's tried to push him away she couldn't i don't even think she could look at another man i don't you know she's i fear she's tried ignoring his calls not replying eventually oh my god but all that and you still couldn't tell me how you felt you almost lost me he's gonna lose you if he doesn't step up now because you're you're gonna be like i ain't got time for this so i mean do you tell do you speak to brian but maybe maybe maybe in this instance we need to just be the one to say brian i like you and i've liked you since that since that kiss come on and then hopefully he's just breaking our our major rule i know sophia i know sophia but he's he's just not like let's just say it see what he says if he's being a twat dancing around the subject still saying oh sarah's cool then it's like okay like we need to end this now friendship and all oh yeah seriously because i can't still see you i fancy you now you know i dream about your lips like and just let's just because he's obviously nervous for some reason he's yeah he's nervous like no one else knows i've got no one to fucking talk to this about i've got sarah bell in my line asking me if you if asking if brian's mentioned her and all this and it's getting too much you know and i did try and you know push those two together but the heart wants what it wants like can you say to brian that like you're putting me in a really awkward position yes because you need to sort out sarah is like confiding in me and i like you need to sort this mess out like i'm feeling a bit awkward like yeah he needs to sort this mess out that's a that's a hard situation to be in when multiple people in the friendship group are liking the same person and you genuinely like this other girl and you no upset feelings and i feel like you didn't really realize you liked him really you were kind of a bit confused i can see you know like no one knew about your kiss you were kind of like oh he probably doesn't like me it's tricky i see how you've got here me too 100 i think brian needs like brian needs to make some more moves for me he needs to like step up a little bit because either we're gonna pretend this whole thing never happened and we're both just gonna be friends and like we're just gonna move on with life and i'll find a different crush and i'll attend yours and Sarah's wedding or like we're actually going to take a bit of a leap now and Sarah's going to be slightly collateral but we'll see how it plays out yep I don't know guys that could only be figured out between the two of you discussions need to be had right should we do our star of the week yeah let me just right our star of the week this week we've got another Victoria I don't think we've got Brian's name but we've got the kids names we're mum and dad this week what Oh no, sorry, we have is Dan.

1:20:57Dan! Dan is our star of the week. Daniel, no doubt. Victoria has said he is the most hardworking and amazing man there is. He has been working six day weeks, sometimes 12 hour days for the last few months to save as much money as possible for our dream home. Dan. He works nonstop across his three businesses. He helps around the house. He cooks, he cleans, he washes and spends any spare moment he has with our boys. Danny. Addison, 11, and Romeo, 1. Romeo! We met in history class when we were 12. Danny. And we've been inseparable since day one. Danny and Vicky. You guys. You guys. Look, here's some pictures of them at school.

1:21:40And look at them now with the family. Danny and Vicky. Such a beautiful family. Oh, you guys. Dan, thanks for being a great hubby, partner. Thank you for holding it down. Thanks for holding it down and stepping up. Working all the jobs, still doing the household chores and still having moments to be a good father and a good husband. Shout out Dan. Woo, Danny. Gorgeous. All right, a quick quote. A quick quote. What wisdom do we need today? Friends to lovers, 100%. Here we go. Brian needs to realise this is how he feels. Okay. Okay. And you know what you guys should, you know, if you're going to have a movie night, watch One Day.

1:22:22No, One Day's not Friends to be. oh watch love rosie that ends well they're together in the end in that you don't watch one day sorry i apologize watch love rosie because that ends well but it just shows like you know you guys need the time is night otherwise you know we'll both be pregnant with different people right this is this is sarah and brian we're just friends friends who steal glances across the room to see who looks away first it's like we need to be direct right you know at this point we can't keep sneaking glances it's like come on brian step up as we said step up or step out of the fucking way friends who know each other's lips you do you know each other's lips like we've had that kiss it's time now and crave feeling them again we're just friends who aren't she keeps looking at me after every line who aren't really friends who aren't really friends at all because i love us in a past life you just the time it's now maybe the next but maybe not this one if brian no exactly and you need so come on brian you silly man come on brian not gonna spoon feed you honestly maybe just send him that and then you can always say sorry that was my friend i fear that that says everything we're just friends but i know your lips we're more than friends you could say i wrote you a poem and then you could send that seriously maybe that maybe sometimes you gotta get a bit creative with it you know it's an idea poems songs letters limericks haikus yes i do i do think something like that could work on brian all right guys thank you so much for listening to another week's episode if you would like another episode every single monday yes you can get it over on patreon we have two episodes a week that you can go and binge absolutely and you can email your dilemmas to hello at the girls bathroom you got followers on youtube tiktok and instagram thank you very much have a good week everybody love you bye