X-RATED: Did he just TOE me?!

0:00This is Hannah Berner from Giggly Squad. O-Pill is the first over-the-counter daily birth control pill available in the U.S. Let's be real, getting a birth control prescription is not always easy and it's so much admin. In fact, about a third of women face barriers to access prescription birth control. Between scheduling appointments, missing work, class, or just trying to exist, it's a lot. But now O-Pill is putting birth control in our control. Opill is a daily birth control that's FDA approved, full prescription strength and estrogen free and 98 % effective when used as directed. Grab it online or at most major retailers, no prescription or doctor's appointment needed.

0:38So if you're thinking about birth control, check out Opill to see if it's right for you. Use code Giggly for 25 % off your first month of Opill at O-P-I-L-L dot com. That's code Giggly at O-P-I-L-L dot com. Birth control in your control. We love to see it. Hey, it's Paige from Giggly Squad. Summer gave your home a workout. Cookouts, long weekends, probably at-home improvement lists that never quite got finished. And now it's fall's turn. And Lowe's is making the changeover easy with their Labor Day deals. Right now, save up to 45 % off select major appliances. So if something's been on your list, this is the time.

1:14Doing laundry? You can save an extra$100 on select laundry pairs. And if you're getting the yard ready for fall, head over and grab three bags of Miracle-Gro 0.75 cubic foot garden soil for just$10. So don't miss these Labor Day deals at Lowe's. Valid through September 9th while supplies last. Selection varies by location. See Lowe's.com for more details. Soil offer excludes Alaska and Hawaii. Something unexpected happened. He started rubbing his toe on my vagina. And they're club toes. like he's just got back from the club they're sweaty like this is not a fresh clean and also those toenails better be short otherwise you're gonna give me a scratch

2:05oh my goodness look at us wow look at us it's like christmas morning i'm feeling like i know it's still august and i know like everyone's saying stop wishing somewhere i stop wishing somewhere i don't give i want to wear my fleece now your mic say whatever you want yeah exactly uh it's my show absolutely welcome back to the show i'm your host chinsley abayless i'm your solo host and the host sophia tuxwood yeah welcome back everyone we're coming live and direct from our flannels yeah which is so like which is unlike either of us can we just speak on this yeah i've not worn a flannel in over a year.

2:44I don't think, wait, I just bought this flannel. I don't think I've ever seen you in a flannel. Really? Really? I don't think I've ever seen this. I don't own it. This is the only, I have blue shirts, but I don't have a flannel. Blue shirts? Yeah, like a blue shirt, but not flannel. Oh yeah, no, not flannel. No, I just bought this from Facebook. Yeah, I I really like it. Do you? Yeah. It's giving pumpkin patch. Mine is super, super soft. That doesn't look that soft. Yeah. It kind of deceived me online. Yeah. It wasn't as pictured. Let's say that. Right. I thought it was going to be like soft and a bit fleecy.

3:23Because this is like soft, cozy, flannel-y. This is like shirt. School shirt. Shirt and tie. But we're trying to make it work. I love the color. It's really nice. Yeah. But it did deceive. It wasn't meant to be. I didn't know it was red, red, red. But anyway. Yeah. So neither of us usually wear flannels. Yeah, but then - And we've both shown up today in a flannel. What does that mean? Should we Google it? It means we're best friends. Yeah, definitely. Should I Google it? Should we Google what that means? Yeah. I sent a telepathy. What does it mean when two people are both wearing a flannel on the same day?

3:52What does it mean when you wear - It's definitely something to do with the eclipse. When you wear - I think. When you, I'm going to say accidentally wear the same thing as - As your acquaintance, you share a very close bond, similar tastes, and are on the same wavelength. Wavelength. Yes. People call this twin sinking. Sinking. Yes. Yes. Twin sinking. Yes. Absolutely. It'd be the cherry on if we were both on Blood Sisters today as well. That would be the cherry on. Yeah. Mine's coming around in about a week, I want to say. Are you still on the new tampons? Why don't you recommend the new tampons?

4:34Oh, the Flow tampons. Yeah. Love those tampons. I need to give them a whirl. Because it's, so it's the organic cotton, which is good for us. Yeah. Our insides without the bleach and chemicals. Yes. Of a regular tampon. But it has the niceness of a plastic feeling applicator. But obviously it's a recyclable, compostable plastic thing. They have them in my hairdressers. Yeah, they're great. That's their tampon of choice. And also the tub is so cute. It was like an ice cream tub. And I just think they look cute. Cuter than the 10 packs box. Have you had the frozen ice cream yet? The frozen yogurt from M &S?

5:10No. I'm on my second tub. Really? Is it that good? I'm not sure about it, Sophia. Okay. No, but try and sell it to me then. Come on, Bea. I'm not sure because I don't frequent M &S. It's not like on my path. I don't. I think if you go into it. So I'd have to be going out of my way. Soft serve frozen yogurt. You're going to be very disappointed. Well, yeah, exactly. That's, yeah. But if you go into it as it is a strawberry yogurt frozen. Do I like strawberry? I love strawberry. Right. Okay. It's for me, it's like, I just have it every night. I'm like, it's light. It's refreshing. It's milky. It's yogurt-y.

5:48It doesn't feel like, whoa, this whole thing of ice cream. Right. I feel a bit sick. It's like, this is yogurt. Yeah, definitely. I'm loving it. Okay. Well, if I ever stumble into an M &S. maybe pick one up my mind yeah and maybe i will be like oh yeah there's that there's that thing that she keeps talking about but i'm back on the chocolate apra yogurts oh what a delight oh honey like i've reverted milk chocolate dark chocolate milk for me too i've reverted back to like the some of my vegan ways guess what i also bought wait i am gonna try and guess like you will get this i almost sent you a picture um okay i've got three guesses all right it's either this is like old from the olden days i know it's on the tip of my turn days i didn't know three guesses i didn't even know they still sold this it's either i thought it was from the 90s it's either that cheese no booja booja no oh fuck you ain't gonna get it When I tell you, you're going to go, oh my fucking God.

6:54Give me a clue. It's savoury. That's a clue. A savoury vegan snack. Like the packaging is like from the 90s. It looks like something our mums would eat if they were like hippies in the 80s. It was acceptable in the 80s. I've never heard that song. Have you never heard that song? It was acceptable at the time. I've never heard that song. You haven't? No, I haven't. It was Hannah Montana. No, that's like a radio classic. Is it Jonas Brothers? No, although I'm trying to get everyone to come and see the Jonas Brothers with me. I think it's just US at the moment. Is that a problem? No, I can travel.

7:34Just checking. You know, I enjoy traveling very much. Just checking. Okay, I don't know. Really? Wait, I want to get this. You ain't. Can I have another clue? Another clue. This is like, this is going to, like, you're going to get it. if I tell you this clue it's pesto flavoured

7:59that tofu remember those fucking blocks of flavoured tofu we would get we'd get from that vegan shop at the top of Nottingham yeah from Holland and Barrett only it was on Zap and I was like oh my god I had flashbacks so it was this that was always that snack that you would have oh it was so good and i was like oh my god i'm gonna buy this and like see if it's didn't they do that other flavor they did sun-dried tomato so basically tomato that's the one that i like it's a block of firm tofu yeah like a vacuum sealed yes and the writing on it is like it's straight from the 80s or whatever it literally looks like a hippie snack in the 80s and then it was on zap and i was like the tofu one the basil the pesto one i was like fuck i was like add to basket have you have you gone through cracked it open fucking hell it's good oh my god it was so good that food existed insert a picture of it because it's so niche if you know you know it's like it was like v you know like the vegan like 10 years ago yeah 15 years yeah but it's i'm i'm i'm doing as i used to do just snacking on it it was so good it was always in angie's fridge that tofu never forget yeah it was good wow yeah so i've kind of reverted well not really well i've I've just been on my mini Cathedral City.

9:18Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm having about three a day. I'm always on the Baby Bells. Packs don't last me long. Yeah. I think I prefer the Cathedral. Yeah, I hear that. It's more like cheese. Cheese, yeah, I understand. And it's less of a faff. Yeah. Because Baby Bells are a bit of a messy faff. And I think it's more like, the flavor is brilliant. Because I like a cheese drink, but I find they're less fulfilling. It's not cheesy enough. Yeah, it's not cheesy enough. It's a fun snack, but it doesn't hit the savory craving. Yeah, it's fun. It keeps the brain sharp. Yeah, it keeps the fingers busy. it's a sensory it's a sensory game like what you give dogs it keeps your hands off your phone because it's two handed I quite like that and it makes it eat slower unless you just like bite it like I do sometimes if I'm feeling really lazy but then I want it to last so I will peel it and then I can I'm not on my phone so pretty good to get your screen time down have a cheese string or a baby bell yeah I think genuinely I think that's a good yeah good tip well it's X rated thank God this week thank God So of course we're in our boyfriend's shirts.

10:16Yeah, we're in our flannels, of course. Just had the night at this boy's house. From the night before. Check this flannel on. This is Brian's shirt. Right. He just flew on. So we're starting with some green flags this week. Oh. Which I like. Oh, nice. Yeah. It's nice to start on a positive one. Yes, absolutely. And also some people might get some tips from this. Any Brian's listening. So this is sexual green flags. Well, it's our question of the week. Cheek. What's a green flag in bed that instantly upgraded someone in your eyes? Wow, got it. If they had a flannel. If they got a flannel, I could throw one after.

10:52If they let me wear the flannel. Making me a priority the whole time. Kissing after. Nice. Well, yeah, you don't want to toss to the side. Absolutely, just thrown away. Just like, oh yeah, great. Just roll over. Not skipping foreplay. Yeah. Handing me a wipe. Wow. Wow. So here's something I prepared earlier. Baby wipe for you. Yeah, some moist twilights. Oh, the Andrax water wipes. A clean skin club. Oh, yeah, a clean skin club. All night physical touch. Protecting my head from hitting the headboard. Okay. Okay, you guys. Is that just not just general care? General care. Like, I'm trying not to hurt you right now.

11:39But yes. Oh, wow. This is service. Got me a cup of tea and snacks after. Wow. Wow. That's nice. Here you go, girl. On a tray. Here's my flan. Here you go. Here's your biscuits. Fuel up, baby girl. Open to try new things. See, I would not want to be brought a cup of tea. I'm just like, I don't drink tea. But Sophia would want tea, I guess. Like a lovely warm beverage. I'd just like a nice glass of chilled water. You'd want someone to whisk up an ice matcha. Yeah. if it was made well. Undoing your bra with one hand. Oh, the brousiers. The brousiers. Does that even mean bra? The brousiers. The brousiers.

12:24The brousiers. The brousier. The brousier. I don't even know if it means that. The brasserie. The brousiers. I mean, that to me is like, like, stop. Taking your bra. No, but like being like with one hand. I'd be like. Reminds me of Joey from Friends. Or you fucking Darren Brown. Reminds me of Joey from Friends. When he like can't get it and he's like sweating behind. Taking a moment to appreciate the lingerie. Okay. Often it's not cheap. He makes sure. Let me just take a moment. Let me just take a moment. Let me just take a picture of this in my mind. I'd be like, ew. Shut the fuck up. Get me the fuck out of here.

13:03What is this guy on? Where's my clothes? Well, it's like that moment from Friends. They're going back on. when he's like, let me take a picture of this. What does he do? Let me take a mental picture. This is so amazing. Making sure I wait after so I don't get a UTI. Okay, nice. Okay. Common courtesy. That's just medical knowledge. Yeah. But yes. Appreciate it nonetheless. Baby girl, make sure you go for the toilet right now. Baby girl, let me see those brisees. Let me take a picture of this right now. Let me go whip you over a cup of tea. make sure you have a wee after here's a wipe as well here's something up apparently a moist toilet right right and more green flags not quick to get up and go after yeah yeah basic respect just basic respect isn't it when they ask to do you like that

14:00yeah i appreciate that sarah a bit of words of affirmation using a condom so i don't have to take hormonal contraception yeah staying safe out there in the streets he broke my dress taking it off and he sewed it back up for me that's nice oh a nimble king yes very good with his with his thread needle and thread does he carry that sewing kit around or yeah because that's unusual for a man to have a sewing in his bag maybe he does things on the side maybe it's a side hustle maybe he's a drag queen on the weekends true and he's got all the equipment seriously yeah like i respect that yeah kind of handy um sucking toes nice okay nice um but i know a lot of people Enjoy that.

14:50Enjoy that. Never afraid to go down on me. Nice. Whoa, I don't want to do it. I'm afraid. I'm so afraid. I'm scared. Open to feedback after the deed. A formal review. Yeah, Sarah. Here's your peer assessment. Sarah wants to be told to go for a week. She wants a cup of tea. She wants her moist toilet. She wants to sit down and do her feedback. So starting from the beginning, did you remember when you said blah, blah, blah, blah, blah? But absolutely. Talking about it is great. Doesn't feel intimidated by my vibrator. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. Like, come on. Yeah. It's to help you out. It's nothing to be fearful of, Brian.

15:31It's literally battery operated, Brian. When they aren't scared of period sex. Yeah. Like, come on. It's just a bit of blood. It's mother nature. It's just a bit of uterus blood. It's all natural. Back scratches after so I can fall asleep. Nice. Nice. That's a nice one. Making me food after. Yeah, nice. When they don't bat an eyelid if I have a hairy moth. Yeah, exactly. That's as Eve and Adam intended it. Absolutely. That's how God made us. Back to our core.

16:09Just before we get into it, quick disclaimer. We are not doctors. We are not professionals. We do not actually know what we are talking about. This is a lighthearted space. Okay. Don't take what we say literally because we could be wrong. Yeah. And if there's anything serious, if there's anything you feel like you're seriously struggling with, please contact a GP, a professional, because that is not us. We're just girls, girls and boys just like you, you know? We're just trying to get through life as well. Not professionals. Enjoy the episode.

16:36Okay. Should we dive straight into the first one? I would love to. I'd love to. He put his toes where? God. Who was that boy we knew that toed that girl at the table? oh my fucking god who was that we knew someone who towed some was in like and i was like no what does that mean it means a toe up your vagina wasn't it that girl's boyfriend that was like oh my fucking god yes it fucking was yes it fucking was yeah how did i do that yeah how does that work like i'm assuming you're wearing trainers or shoes shoes are coming off socks coming off toes going in like how is that happening he must have been in flip-flops or like a slide of some sorts because come on that's too much if he was trying to be casual about it so nimble with your toes that we're moving a pant to the side like seriously i'm thinking about it in my head under a table yeah it's quite skillful others so obviously he's you know agile and gifted in movement if you will yes god so yeah obviously it's something that turns some of these boys on yeah i've never experienced it first hand me neither but obviously it's something that we've heard now two accounts of this and that that boys want to stick their toes somewhere in areas like it's like you've got fingers for that hey girls i've been listening for a while and you have helped me get through many long hours of my law degree wow wow i object amazing ever since sharing this story with my housemates we've been wondering if it's normal and what is your thoughts okay okay the flannel girls are here to the rescue yeah listen nothing these flannels can't i just got my toes painted black maybe that's a sign of like we're going into darker days you know and like Toes are going in places.

18:29Yeah, we're talking about toes more freely. Yeah. We've got good wiki feet scores. Yeah. I'm not worried. I think mine's pretty good these days. Maybe I should. Toes make it come back. That's fine by me. I'm very toe confident. Absolutely. So a few months back, I met a guy in a club. Let's call him Brian. We had a fun little chat and a few kisses. Exchanged Instagram, but nothing more happened other than a few messages that night of him wanting to see me. Sorry. Let's go past them. it just needs to burn sorry just gonna pass some gas real quick just gonna pass something through just gotta pass some gas other than a few messages that night of him wanting to see me inviting me back to his country manor country manor that sounds totally amazing that sounds totally awesome that sounds totally awesome dude wicked sweet I'll be right there fucking hell well we've got a picture of him and it looks like she made it to the manor we don't have to toe the line tonight ew uh ew um um toe fast totally awesome you've got it that's the best one that's totally awesome but we're gonna call this guy rodney because rodney likes toes and it just it gives that vibes yeah knees and toes yeah rods knee yeah knee oh she's funny yeah I didn't even get that so he's saying come back to my country man honey and you're like we just had one kiss like I'm not like relax I'm out in town but fast forward to this weekend I'm out having fun again are we in America?

20:13no it's a country man I don't think they have country manors in America yes they do country manors not manors they got ranchers oh of course you know yeah and manors they got manners in America I don't think don't they it doesn't go back that far like to have you know I mean I don't know I don't do history but yeah that's okay fast forward to this weekend I'm out having fun having a fun time dancing with the girls and guess who taps me on the back Rodney the big toe right Rodney Rodney's here we get chatting away again in the club sharing some kisses and long story short he invites me back to his country manor for a drink country manor

21:04right well she just says back to his so we don't know if it's actually the country manor or it could have just been yeah talk we go back to his for a drink being the nosy girl I am I was looking nosy being the toesy girl that I am okay being the Nosy toesy. My nose is running. Same. This is flannel. Being the nosy girl that I am, I was very looking forward to seeing this so-called country man. Me too. Me too. Listen, we're dressed appropriately for the country man-er. Save a horse, ride a cowboy. Yeah, there we go. So we got an Uber back to his. Okay. One thing led to another. And when I was giving him head.

21:48Whoa.

21:54Listen to this When I was giving him A toad It was totally Unexpected Something totally Unexpected happened He started rubbing his toes Did she actually write totally No she just said Something unexpected I added in the totally so something unexpected happened he started rubbing his toe on my vagina and their club toes he's just got back from the club they're sweaty like this is not a fresh clean and also those toenails better be short otherwise you're gonna give me a scratch and that's gonna hurt yeah this is like i bet it made you jump i bet you were like what the fuck is that yeah yeah what's the angle here I'm not sure how the fuck we're sitting.

22:50I was so taken aback. Totally taken aback. I was totally taken aback. I never had anything like this happen to me before. Did he have socks on? Hopefully not. Obviously not. It was a raw, fresh toe. Right. It also didn't help that he didn't really do any of the foreplay. So I got touched more. Toes was all you got. So I got touched more by his toe than his hands during sex.

23:20Right. So he just went, he was like, look, I'm, he was like, I'm not being shy. Yeah. This is me. This is what I enjoy. These are my toes. Toes first. Yeah. Tense up. What's that? Pinky up. Toes up. Right. Right. Would love to know your thoughts and opinions on this. Happily did it for the plot, but maybe being nosy comes at a price. and I won't be seeing him again. You weren't nosy, you were tosy. Yeah, he was very tosy. I was nosy about it. I have attached a picture of us from our first night out and the lovely breakfast view from the country manor. I was going to ask about the manor. It actually looks, it's giving a stale manor.

24:03Oh, it's giving country a state. Yeah. I would go back. And this is the totally boy. Was he wearing flip-flops? he is giving toe like in the best way well not in the best way yeah he is giving toe yeah although that's his hands he does have fingers he does have long fingers so i'm not really sure i wish we had more details sarah you know just like how the experience did you have sex or did all you get was just some toe she said that other than she said the only foreplay i got I was touched more by his toe than his hands during sex. But did they have sex? During sex. During sex? So I was touched more by his toes than his hands.

24:49It's obviously very bendy. During sex. I'm just trying to picture where a toe could go while we're having sex. I know. In your bum hole? But then he's like bending like crazy. Was he just like stroking you with his toes? Maybe. But yeah, Mr. Nibble. Is this normal? I don't know. I've not experienced this firsthand. Neither have I. Should I just do a quick Google on? Some people like toe action. There's no toe shame here. Do men. But yeah, I think, I don't know. Did you have a good time? Was it fun? Well, she says she won't be going back. She said she just went with it for the plot. Oh, I thought she was going back.

25:23She said, I won't be going back. I just went with it for the plot. Is this normal? Ah, I'm going to say no then in that case. I'm just Googling. But we do know about that guy who towed that girl on the table. Yeah, so I do think it is like something where they're like, get some going in some respect. Yeah. they can't resist I mean Google is saying safety and hygiene feet carry bacteria yeah like what if you have a fungal infection and the skin can harbour infections like athlete's foot inserting a toe in the vagina carries a risk of introducing bacteria which can lead to irritations or infections such as such as yeast or bacterial vaginosis I feel sick sharp or untrimmed toenails also pose exactly sharp of causing internal scratches or tears oh stop it oh I mean look she lifts it out of the town doesn't sound like let's totally avoid this mess Yeah, seriously.

26:09I think so. I mean, because practice like this are unconventional, discussing boundaries and comfort levels openly with a partner is critical before trying anything new. That's why I'm surprised he didn't go, how do you feel about one, two, three, four, five toes? This little piggy, this little piggy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, look, there's glowing.com. Toe in vagina. Toe in vagina. People do it. But yeah, that was obviously a first. for yourself i mean yeah i'm just surprised and disappointed he didn't say how do you feel about x y and z like a toe me too yeah um for him to go straight in with a toe obviously he thinks it's normal for him yeah he always does the toast like maybe that maybe his ex enjoyed yeah it was totally normal for them absolutely um but yeah it's it's unconventional unless every listener here is like we totally do all the time we totally love our toes in all places all the time yeah yeah maybe you guys let us know on that one yeah um but we're totally not experts on that hi it's brooke devard host of naked beauty and i want to talk about how i upgrade my hosting experience there's a moment just before guests arrive when my home stops feeling like a series of rooms and it becomes an atmosphere the light settles the air shifts and then the beautiful scent of jasmine rose and fig fill the air it feels warm and considered that's what pura does It turns fragrance into environment, a collection of beautiful, clean fragrances, all controlled from your phone.

27:38Choose your sense of place at Pura.com. This is Hannah Berner from Giggly Squad. O-Pill is the first over-the-counter daily birth control pill available in the U.S. Let's be real. Getting a birth control prescription is not always easy, and it's so much admin. In fact, about a third of women face barriers to access prescription birth control between scheduling appointments, missing work class or just trying to exist it's a lot but now opill is putting birth control in our control opill is a daily birth control that's fda approved full prescription strength and estrogen free and 98 effective when used as directed grab it online or at most major retailers no prescription or doctor's appointment needed so if you're thinking about birth control check out opill to see if it's right for you use code giggly for 25 off your first month of opill at o-p-i-l-l.com that's code giggly at o-p-i-l-l.com birth control in your control we love to see it

28:49okay quick fire dilemma i like these question found porn on my fiance's phone do i confront him about it well yeah if he's not being open about it he's actively being secretive about it then it's like what else are you hiding like if you're gonna watch porn at least like don't be secretive about it yeah i think you confront 100 okay locked into a lie whoa whoa hello girls i'm a huge fan from america oh my god here we go back to the country and i've been listening to your podcast for a while now i have a dilemma that i really need your help with i am 23 and my boyfriend brian is 28 we met working in the same research lab and we've been together for almost three years we don't live together yet but overall we have a really strong relationship we get along really well we have similar interests same sense of humor and we genuinely care deeply about each other we rarely fight we've talked seriously about engagement, marriage, starting a family, all of that stuff.

29:52The only issue in our relationship is our sex life. For context, I have always had a very difficult time having an orgasm without a vibrator. Maybe you just need some good old toes. Like that's what's missing. Seriously, maybe this is the subject of this episode. Yeah. Seriously. Like maybe, anyway. Nothing I have tried can we have some toe experts listen i know loads of girls who love their toes being sucked perfect yeah there's any more about that i just know that they enjoy that like he's gonna like my toes but i mean like can we have some girls writing in who like enjoy a toe and then oh yeah i would like that i would like to understand more like stories and some success i mean there's Probably some girls who like putting their toes in places.

30:42Yeah. Not just like, well, I guess what other holes have they got? Their bum hole. Yeah. Nothing I have tried on my own or with previous partners has worked besides that. Besides a vibrator. Yeah. It's unfortunate, but it seems to just be the way my body is. Sex with Brian is still nice. I like feeling close to him, but I have never actually had an orgasm with him. It's been three years. Well, here is where I went wrong. oh i've been faking it oh yeah so he thinks he's the king of of america he thinks he's he thinks he's like yeah he thinks he rocks your world he is genuinely very sweet in bed and always tries to prioritize me he often says he wants me to finish before he does the problem is and he thinks he can click his fingers and you're just all guys and man he's like my girl she gets it down I know her body so good.

31:36I know all her tics. I know what she likes. It's so easy for me and Sarah to just get it going. Our bodies are like, what? So of course, I know, honey, you got it orgasm first. And you just get. Yeah, you're just like. Yeah. He often says he wants me to finish first. The problem is no matter what we do, I am never even close. It feels like it feels nice, but not enough to get me there. over time partly to speed things along and partly because i wanted to make him feel good i started faking yeah about a year into our relationship i bought up the idea of trying a vibrator he was initially very hesitant about it he basically said that he didn't love the idea of bringing a sex toy into our relationship because he felt like we should be enough on our own little did you know honey yeah totally not hitting the bill he is pretty vanilla overall and views sex toys as unnecessary.

32:32I tried explaining that vibrators are important for my pleasure, but then he pointed out I seem to orgasm fine on that one. Yeah, so he's thinking like, I do enough for you, honey. I do enough. I'm better than any vibrator. Obviously, I could not really push back on that without admitting that I've been faking it. Last December, I bought a new vibrator. I wanted to use with him. I think he saw that it was important, so he agreed. A few nights later, we were kissing and he asked if I wanted to use it. Oh, nice. I was very excited. He was open to it. Yeah. Using, maybe he held it between his toes.

33:13Using the vibrator with him was honestly an amazing experience. Good. I felt really close to him and it felt incredibly intimate and emotional in a way I did not expect. Wow. I have one of the best orgasms I've ever experienced. And I just felt so connected to him. Yeah. Perfect. Do you think he noticed like, oh, whoa, this is new. Yeah. Like you've never done this before. Like kind of thing. Yeah. Or men are just stupid though, aren't they? So he probably didn't even. The problem was right afterwards, I realized he was not into it. Yeah. He said he felt. Yeah, because he's seeing your will's being wrought right now by this battery operated.

33:52Yeah. And he's thinking, I've never seen her make these faces or hear these noises before. And he's insecure. He's panicked. And he's feeling his ego bruised. Because Willie's not got batteries in it. Yeah, exactly. He said he felt left out. Oh, please. Oh, please. Please. But just like, shut up. And then pretty much rolled over and went to sleep. Oh, please. His ego was just so bruised. Are you a child? Grow up. Come on. I told him it was okay that we had tried it. and it might just not be his thing and we could move on. He's so insecure about it. But also Sarah, like I know he doesn't realize this, but like you've been trying to make, you know, him feel good and trying to be like, oh yeah, like I'm loving this.

34:33Like you've not been putting yourself for three years. And then the minute you do try something new and you're actually loving it, he's just so quick to be like, no. I feel left out. Left out. It's a fucking little battery operated thing. Like there's not another man in here. I know. Like there's literally not another man in here. you like come on like this just shows he would never fake it with you for three years no of course not he'd be like no i'm not feeling it no you need to do this this isn't right yeah of course and he would make it known yeah but you've been such a people pleaser you know throughout this just wanting to make him feel good and not yourself and not wanting to inconvenience him or think that you're being damaged his ego yeah and at the end of the day it's like i'm a naked i'm naked right like be appreciative like i'm right here naked like we're having sex like there's just another little thing involved like and all of a sudden it's oh I'm so left out I'm going just like come on okay so he rolled over and you said it's okay it might not be the thing but afterwards I felt terrible I ended up crying in his bathroom part of it was embarrassment and self-consciousness because I was having such an amazing experience while he clearly was not but another part of it was realizing how good sex between us because I could actually be when I was able to orgasm whilst also feeling like it could never become a normal part of our relationship.

35:50Since then, things have mostly gone back to how they were before. Sex is fine, but not satisfying. I still fake it. I never finish. I told one of my friends about this and even she said she genuinely did not know what I should do. So I wanted to ask you both, where do I go from here? Is there any realistic way to have a satisfying sex life with him without admitting that I have been faking orgasms for three years? Or do I need to tell him the truth at this point? If so, how do I go about that? Okay, so our options are... We need a professional in the building. Yeah. Options are... Tell him... Right, we've got two options, I think.

36:30Yeah, we've got... Let's not overcomplicate it. Option one is tell him the truth. Babe. Babe. I'm gonna be honest with you. I've never had an orgasm with you. Like, we just be honest. Argasm. Argasm. We just got to be honest. But from what I've heard about this guy, he's going to take it terribly. He's going to huff and puff. He's going to be miserable. He's not going to be like loving and understanding because from what we've heard from him, he sounds like he's going to chuck his dummies out the pram and like throw a fit and turn it on you and make you out to be like this bad guy and all of this.

37:05Bad girl. Bad girl and all of this. Isn't he? Yes. He's not going to be like, oh my poor, oh my God. No. Let's fix this. Should we try my toes? Yeah. What about toes? What about every, you know? Yeah. It doesn't sound like he's going to act like that straight away. No. Okay. Which is the concern. Because if he was going to be like understanding and loving. I can understand like there might be some initial shock from him being like, what? Are you? Oh my God. What? Because you would be like, oh my God, why have you never said this before? but you would like to think that he would then quite quickly come around and be like thank you so much for telling me i know but listen his whole ego no he's not gonna do he's been walking around for three years i'm a man i keep my woman happy yeah my woman you know she all got i just clip my fingers yeah it's so easy yeah like i got this i rock up my willy's so big like all in her world she's not worried like he's been walking around feeling like that yeah you're gonna say i've for three years you've never made me orgasm well you've never made me orgasm his whole ego is going to be shattered shattered shattered shattered he's going to feel so insecure and it's going to come out in like this like negative negative defensive way and trying to make you out to be like you've done something wrong yeah and even though yes you you were you have lied to some sort of degree but So that's one option.

38:27Only to like, appears him. Yeah. Appeals him. Appeals. Option number two is to kind of just, we're going into sex next time. And it's like, I'm not going to fake it. And we're going to keep going, keep going, keep going. That's true. And explore, explore, explore until it happens. Why don't you actually just stop faking it? Because one thing she said was like, in order to speed things up, like I feel like I'm taking too long. And so I just fake it. I think just take that out of your breath like no this is gonna take as long as it takes and I'm not gonna fake it this time and he's gonna have to pull his socks up and like let's get to work and let's see if we can get there and maybe try that next and just see if we can get it might take fucking hours and hours but like let's see 100 % just stop faking it because then also you could just kind of say like oh I've kind of regressed it's taken me a bit longer to get there these days you're gonna have to do x y and z yes let's try something new exactly and it's like oh i don't definitely stop faking it i don't orgasm as easy as i did you know a couple years ago back in the day and kind of just play it like that yeah and then if you're if it's still then not happening you've then you're then in a different position to be like let's reintroduce the vibrator and then hopefully he's then gonna see it more as like a helping hand and less of like something this in the way and hopefully he would realise like wow she's enjoying this so much more this is so much more of a positive experience like it's not taking away from anyone's pleasure like it's just only adding and hopefully he would then see it as a positive rather than right now he sees it as just like or hopefully like his other skills just like improve because he's trying to get you there and he's thinking we're problem solving and we're doing all these other things stop people pleasing and stop faking it I think just stop faking it and it's like let him know oh you've not made me orgasm tonight

40:24and like, let's see. What do we do about that? Yeah, like, come on. Like, we do have, yeah. Like, make, yeah. Yeah. And then if we need to, then we just tell him the truth. Yeah. But I think let's definitely do that first. Just try, stop faking it and we'll stop being honest. Yeah. But maybe don't tell him we've been lying for three years. Yeah. Oh yeah, ignorance is bliss. I would leave that bit out. For the meantime. Just because I know how he's - There's got other avenues we can go down. I know how he's gonna react. totally totally right next up quick-fired zalama he's an incredible provider but the sex is meh am i staying or leaving oh sorry leaving so you're staying and then just guiding him in that respect i think it could be i think there's things that you could probably improve yeah like how mad is it i know this is the problem we don't have any more this is the quick fire problem yeah i would try first toes don't be afraid to yeah definitely toes um like the girl before like don't be afraid to instruct you know don't be afraid to use a toy like there's things that could be improved but maybe he's just like so lackluster and just like but just like maybe he's just so not into it like he just doesn't enjoy it sex maybe he's like i don't maybe he's just like hypothetically maybe he's just like i'm happy just having sex once every six months yeah that's how i like it yeah but but he's providing we've got a chanel bag on our shoulder we're gonna you know eight bed house Whoa.

42:09Gosh. Yeah. I think I can provide for myself. Yes. Do you know what I mean? Yes. But I think there's things you could try to improve it. Yes. Yes. It can be improved. Yes. Anything can be improved. Okay. Next dilemma. Am I asexual or just a hopeless romantic? Let's see. Let's find out. oh my god sorry i've just scrolled down got some images of the hunk if i do say so myself oh my god i'll just show you the hunk straight away whoa hunk it's huh hunky town wow any feet pics with that sir let's see the toes sir yeah gotta see the toes i mean it's so blurry but wow fuck yeah who is this guy if this is your provider you should definitely stay right okay but am i asexual or just a hopeless romantic we need to lock him who is this guy who is he it's probably hi girls absolutely love you girls i'm especially a massive fan of sophia's book club oh thank you sarah you've got your own book boyfriend here as we've I know.

43:29And whenever Sophia responds to one of my comments, I genuinely get embarrassingly excited. Aww. Best club ever. Also, I love every one of Chincy's TikToks. Major side note, I'm on holiday and had a pistachio matcha and thought Chincy would love it. I used to try it. I had a pistachio paste. It had a pistachio paste. And then crusted pistachios into it. It was delicious. That sounds good, actually. I like a pistachio moment. You put that up at home. Yeah. Anyway, I'm in the classic long-time listener our first time writer so here goes i'm 23 i've always been quite insecure about my body and my looks i've never really felt pretty enough or good enough especially when it comes to boys i watch sorry hey little girl well go ass in the air blueberry ass decorum ass up girl ass up face down right whoa right especially when it comes to boys i watch all my friends get the guys and get into relationships whereas I've never had a boyfriend and and have very little experience before the dilemma I'd only slurring my words she's distracted by the man's photo watch out girl she's after your man no Sarah don't worry before this dilemma I'd only slept with one guy and to put it politely it wasn't exactly life-changing I'm gonna be TMI here here we go this is exactly what we need so apologies in advance no apologies but i genuinely don't think i've ever come oh c-u-n i can't speak but i genuinely don't think i've ever come into my life oh come in my life yes she actually means you but she's wrote it c-o-m-e so i was like come into my life.

45:17Oh, okay. So we've never had an orgasm. But we've only slept with one guy. What can we expect? I've tried toys and everything, but nothing seems to work. So overall, my experience with men is basically kissed a few frogs, slept with one, and absolutely no Prince in sight. Anyway. Oh my God. I'm currently on holiday, of course. Is this the guy on holiday? Oh my God. And one of my friends happens to be here too. Could you help me with my sun cream on my back? Could you put some sun cream on my toes?

45:48yes on my toes I bet he would enjoy like you putting your sun his sun cream on with your feet feet yes the first guy would definitely like that yeah he would so we are polar opposites she's incredibly confident sleeps around gets the guys and is just completely comfortable with that side of herself being around her made me feel a bit insecure and maybe and like maybe I should put myself out there more So I decided to go on a hinge date. So we're on holiday and we're going on a hinge date. Amazing. He originally asked me to go straight to his. But I'm an innocent, hopeless, romantic at heart and also have some survival instincts too.

46:26Yeah. Yeah. Good point. It's not safe. Yeah. Well done. So I suggested a bar instead. Nice. Okay. Yeah. A mutual space. Yes. I have survival instincts. Yeah. We don't need to be murdered. Yeah. Okay. We went for drinks and he seems lovely. Afterwards, he asked me back to his. And I thought, you know what? I'm on holiday. All my friends have casual sex. Maybe I need to stop overthinking everything and just try it. You know what? Yes. We approve. Yeah. We got back to his, chatted for a bit, and then things moved on very quickly to his sofa. This man was not exactly a giver. I mean, you can expect this with like the one night stands of it all.

47:05Yeah, they're there for their own gain. Yeah, he's not going to be like, so you, my love. Let me take a moment to appreciate it. let me take a step back and appreciate in the lingerie yeah yeah would you like a cup of tea like he's not but it's it's like we're on a one night stand we're having fun whatever he barely did anything to me and mostly sorry I thought she was gonna say toes again sorry and mostly just wanted me to suck his dick during which I found a hair where girls please I'm gagging again just writing this what stuck to his oh can we move on when i left i went straight to the 24 hour shop and got mouthwash well listerine emergency so it was a bit of a dirty dick yeah so you had no you had no so he was just like suck it it wasn't romantic it wasn't didn't rock your world whatever he then he asked if we could have sex without a condom wait so when did we oh this is just during to which i told him absolutely not eventually we had sex and let's just say i'm clearly far more innocent than i realized because instead of finding everything he was doing sexy i felt like oh this poor girl i ex i felt like i'd accidentally sign myself up for a bush tucker trial he i bet he was just like dirty that's what it's giving oh my god it was filthy wasn't it no but like his flat was filthy it was filthy and like the bed was not his willy stonk and just like i bet there was like food next to the bed and just like plates and cups and just shit yeah nowhere con it was hot in there the bathroom was rank yeah everywhere hair in the sink yeah oh then he wanted to try yeah that's funny sarah you can tell there's a wordsmith yeah then he wanted me to talk dirty to him and my mind was You don't ask for much, do you?

49:01I've just fucking met you, mate. Do you say it for me for once? Yeah. You can't just say that. You don't know. And my mind went empty. Like, what am I meant to say? Yeah. So awkward. There was also a moment beforehand where he lost his erection. Oh, this is just... Oh, Sarah. This is how it made me feel... I hate this for you.

49:23This is like the hookup from hell. Yeah. Is this the guy as well? I think so. Oh, no. I think so I'm so sorry we were so attracted to him unless she meets another guy I don't know unless there's another experience oh no but this was his hinge pic we've all fell for it so there was also a moment beforehand where he lost his erection and asked me to go down on him again again and I'm sorry girls but it was tiny

49:51Sarah you're just going it's like I've already fucking sucked it get out of there Sarah I've already sucked it now you've lost your erection I'm not doing that again now it's like all shriveled and you want me to like get it back up it's just like i've just met you let me leave i'm going like it stinks in here like yeah you know i know we don't body shame of course of course but between that the rogue hair what was this hair wrapped around his willy or something like a girl's hair like a long hair something like that or it was a long pube or something just like dangling somewhere and the bush took a trial vibes i was fighting for my life yeah anyway he finished i very much did not it's left me wondering am i asexual no sarah you are not funny that was just a bad sexual experience that was just the hookup from hell quite literally like is there something wrong with me sexually no sarah there is nothing wrong with that and listen you're romantic you're just like oh you know the vibes like if I was to think about going up having a one night stand yeah you want it to be sexy yes steamy exciting yeah like I'm in this sexy flat yeah you know what smells nice in here the air con's on yeah like he's dreamy look at his big willy yeah like she's like guys it was tiny so like you want it to rock your world and you went into that kind of expecting that because our expectations are high music yeah like you know like we're on holiday like he's sexy spanish man like you've had a few drinks yeah like that's kind of what we're expecting and also first one night stand ever yes second sexual experience ever we're still very much kind of being like yay rock my world like you know with our expectations are high yeah and he just let you down in many more ways than one many many ways or am i simply someone who needs an emotional connection to actually enjoy sex maybe it's that sarah maybe it's that I think you just need a bit more attention.

51:50This guy gave me nothing. He was just selfish. He was selfish. He was a selfish lover. And you were also, he was a selfish lover. And you were also just there like, oh my God, this is a bit of a weird environment. Like I'm not sure how I feel about this. Like you weren't relaxed and you were never gonna get anywhere close if you aren't relaxed and you aren't having fun. You don't feel comfortable. And you aren't like super, super happy to be there. It's a little bit awkward. It was a bit like stop and start. It was a bit like, oh, talk to, I don't know what to say. like um mate like you're spanish like i can't speak spanish i also think maybe your learnings here is just like oh i don't enjoy one night stands and that's it i need to have been on a few more dates with someone know them a bit more feel a bit more of a connection yeah to then for me to enjoy that sexual experience and maybe that's just what you've learned i don't think it means that you don't enjoy sex at all no because it's yeah so she said because the thing is I want romance.

52:44I want the ridiculous romance I read in my books. I want someone who actually cares about me, understands that I'm less experienced and makes me feel comfortable and wanted rather than like I'm here for their enjoyment. But I barely date. Before this, my last date was over a year ago and I'm starting to feel genuinely hopeless. Think that I'll ever find someone. I think there's also a layer to all of this, which is my confidence. I've wanted you girls to talk about this for ages. How do you actually learn to love your body and feel attractive so girls i need your wisdom how do i stop comparing myself to my friends and feeling like i'm behind because i haven't had a boyfriend or loads of sexual experiences how do i figure out what i actually enjoy sexually when so far i've enjoyed approximately none of it please help an insecure hopeless romantic out i know your girls love pics of me attached and the hinge profile pic of brian i'm so sorry that subjected me to a bush took a try i know i'm really sorry we swooned over him like that because he's a freak.

53:39We don't like him. He's a freak of the week. He said he was 5 '10 and he was shorter than me and I'm 5 '7. That's deceiving. Well, let's just take a look. I mean, you can barely see. I mean, he is a honk. He is a honk. Sorry, no, he's not. But he's not. And this is our gorgeous Sarah. It's a little blurry, but she's got a little red top on. Oh, red dress. Yes. Sorry, you look gorge. It's a very blurry image, but you look fantastic from what I can see. I think Sarah, this was just one of them. This was just a bad experience. It was a bad egg, you know. You were selfish, you weren't comfortable.

54:14Everything we already kind of like touched on, I think. And I think confidence in your body and confidence sexually just take, I honestly feel like it just takes time and it takes like some years of just like knowing yourself more. Like as we approach our thirties. Here she goes, yeah, let's get it. It's like you do feel more comfortable just in yourself and who you are and how you look and it's just like i'm not fine it's what it is it's not what it is and it's like you learn to accept yourself and and it's like it's not the most important thing in the world how you look and and you know you just want to enjoy your life classic thing that we always say like comparison is the thief of joy like if you are comparing yourself constantly to like your friend like you said at the beginning who are very sexual nothing alike and your personalities are so different like and you think oh well everyone likes her she gets all the boys and like they're not looking at me like it is it is truly is the thief of joy like there's always going to be someone who's got more this or more that or is this or that you just you're your own person no one else is you that's your strength there's going to be someone so many people who really gravitate towards you and who really connect with you and really like you and don't just try and be like someone else because you are amazing you are gorgeous that you do like you have hobbies that you love I'm sure you have family and friends that you love like you are perfect and you are amazing yeah and someone else is going to see that and I think what it's going to take here to make you feel more confident sexually and in your body experience as well experience more but also just like I think you just need to have a sexual experience with someone who you care about and they care about you and who you're attracted to yeah and you feel like something to you as well and like makes you feel really desired and really sexy and like that will all and we're only gonna find that by going on more dates trying out some different guys lean on your friend like you described your friend as someone who's always going out like always got a date like i'd be like can we do a double date like surely whoever she's going out with on friday has got a mate like i would ask her like bring me in like i'd love to go out with you like can we go get some drinks even before you go off on your date and then maybe I could meet someone like I think doing things with your friends is so fun I think if you're both single I would really lean into that and make some fun memories and get her to set up some double dates if you can and that would even just help like get ready together have some drinks together go there together it makes it fun like it just makes it fun and it's like a group environment it's slightly less pressure doesn't have to be all this like oh one-on-one like oh conversation yeah blah like I would really lean on her I think instead of feeling like oh i'm comparing myself to her it's like no this is one of my mates like i think she's great she thinks i'm great like let's lean in like let's let's get involved also being okay with like not every guy i meet is gonna rock my world not every guy i meet are we like gonna fall madly in love and have all this connection like you're gonna kiss some frogs you're gonna meet some guys you're like oh yeah not for me that was a bit of a waste of a night or the reality is you're unfortunately gonna go on more bad dates than you are good days but that's just a part of the process that's part of it because then when you do find it eventually you're going to be even more grateful that you found what you were looking for I think you just got to keep putting yourself out there and it sounds like you are and it sounds like you want to do that yeah which is great yeah and I think lean into this friend who seems to be finding all these guys and just kind of tag along and just have fun yeah just tag along that's what it's about yeah good luck Sarah

57:51Another quick fire. Had a threesome with my two best friends at work. Do I act like it never happened? Fuck. Oh my fuck. Wow. King God. Well, what is everyone else saying? What are they saying? Yeah, because you can't be denying it if those two aren't. I mean, do you want it to happen again? Like, are they going to tell someone? Because once they tell someone, then everyone's going to know. And it's not really your decision, is it? Yeah, it's kind of going to be out of your hands. I think you just go in the next day. I think if you enjoyed it. Giggles, giggles, giggles. Yeah. It was fun. It was fun.

58:24We had a great time. Like we're not like being like, whoa. Whoa, that was so secretive. Like I think just trying like, the best thing is just to giggle at it. Yeah. And then see how everyone else is acting. Right, last dilemma. My boyfriend loves me too much to treat me like a slut. Whoa. Right, so you're a dirty little girl. She's a bad girl. And he's a bit more vanilla in bed. And you want him to like rile it up a little bit. Maybe we should get the total. Seriously, that's the running theme of the episode. It really is. Hey girlies, I have been having a bit of an issue in the bedroom with my boyfriend and I wanted to know if anyone else has experienced this.

58:59We've been together for two years and our sex life has always been quite vanilla. I'm not the most confident person and I've always preferred my partner to take the lead in the bedroom. It's something that I do struggle with. A while ago, I told my boyfriend that I'd like to experiment more and be a bit kinkier. Nothing too extreme, just things like, you know, be a bit more dominant, you know, throw me around a little bit, that kind of vibe. He was completely open and said, okay, but months later, nothing has really changed. When I bought it up again, he said he'd actually prefer me to lead so he knows exactly what I'm comfortable with.

59:35Okay. The problem is I don't want to lead. That's the whole thing that I find attractive. Right. Eventually, he admitted something that really stuck with me. He said, it's almost like I feel you're so beautiful and pure that I don't want to treat you like a slut. Right. I don't know how to explain it. So he's like, I literally don't know how to, you know, be that way with you. He's like, you're my like precious, beautiful girlfriend that I adore. And now you want me to embody this like other character. Yes. And I'm struggling. Yes, yes, yes. I know from conversations we have when we first started dating that he definitely has that kinkier side to him.

1:00:15Oh, okay. So I'm confused about why it's disappeared when it comes to me. What's even stranger is my ex-boyfriend said something really similar. Interesting. So now I'm wondering if it's me. Am I giving off some kind of energy where the men I date feel like they have to be really gentle with me? I don't actually want to be treated badly. I just want them to feel comfortable, you know, being a bit rougher. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because that's what I enjoy. I want to feel sexy and desired, not like they're constantly worried they'll cross a line. Has anyone else experienced this? Is there a better way to communicate what I want without feeling like I have to direct everything?

1:00:49I'm 27, he's 31. Thanks, Girls Love the Pod. Interesting. It's weird that you've had both of them say that. That is interesting. It's like, have you two been chatting or what? Because that's quite a niche line. I will say maybe you do have to show him just one time. like this is what I feel comfortable with I like it if you did this this and this and guide him one time and then he will know yes and feel more comfortable to do it a second time and then kind of lead do you know what I mean like maybe I know that's not what you find attractive but maybe just for the first time and it can be in the moment you know when you're in the mood doesn't have to be sat in the living room you know over dinner yes yes and like just guide him slowly and yeah and then hopefully he's like oh okay i can lead next time and yeah you know rock your world baby rock your world honey tell me honey honey honey honey honey but good luck yes star of the week what are you saying this week here we go honey right hey girls i want to nominate my boyfriend as star of the week my boyfriend cory shout out cory we've been together for almost a year now and it feels like i've known him my whole life he is genuinely the most amazing man i've ever met and there isn't a day that goes by that i don't feel safe heard and understood oh he's not only my boyfriend but genuinely my bestie he's the most thoughtful kind person i know he's the type of guy who opens the car door for me every time oh yeah brings me flowers all the little things my favorite food my favorite snacks one thing that absolutely gets me is that he has a whole section in his notes app dedicated to me.

1:02:27Very nice. He's written down things like my favorite foods, what I don't like, perfumes that I've liked in shops, my takeaway orders. He makes me feel so loved and cared for in a way that I've never felt before. I genuinely feel so lucky to call him my boyfriend. And if this doesn't make him star of the week, I don't know what will. Wow. Wow. Sarah and Corey, shout out. I love that notes app thing. Yeah, that's so cute. Because he's really, you know, trying to be considerate and remember, you know, all of the things that make you tick, Sarah. Absolutely. Well, guys, thank you so much for listening to this week's X-Faided episode.

1:03:03Absolutely. If you have a Star of the Week entry or a dilemma, you can email it to hello at thegirlsbackroom.com. And follow us on Instagram, TikTok and YouTube. Thank you. If you're in the group chat on Patreon, we'll see you on Monday. Absolutely. If not, we'll see you next Wednesday. Bye. Bye.

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