X-RATED: Keep it a fantasy... or make it happen?

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1:46help my boyfriend can't handle my vagina and it appears we have attached pictures this is not appropriate blueberry stop licking the yeah the protein girl you know the drama is never ending don't let it get the best of you Hello, Blue One. Happy Wednesday. Happy Wednesday. Blue Bree's having a little lick of my hand. Yeah, she's very excited today. And I just got a blow dry and I'm giving Curly Sue. Curly Sue. Or as Mark would say, scrunch. Oh yes, this is the signature scrunch. This is the signature scrunch. Happy September. How is everyone doing? Happy September. Chinsea's birthday month has arrived.

2:32Okay, yes. How are we feeling? Absolutely ready for it. Ready for more wisdom. Can't wait. Yes. We're going to go to Paris. We're going to live it up. Yeah. We're going to live it up with a beautiful hotel. What's the word? Eiffel view room. That is all I want is an Eiffel view room. And the chocolate meal for it. We can get the chocolate meal for it all the way on room service. From an undisclosed location. Very excited. Can't wait. And I'm thinking, we need to do different things. I completely agree so I'm thinking where are we on the Disneyland trip oh you see we've got a problem with the Disneyland trip is Mariana wants to go Disneyland and I said I would take her she can't come she's a teacher now and I think exactly she's on placement and I think if I go to Disneyland it will be she will drop me as a sister you know it gets that serious when she gets left out even though you know she's working so I'd have to discuss it with her in depth.

3:34Yeah. Well, I think you should. Yeah, because that would be nice. Because it would be great. Disneyland Paris action. It's so easy in Paris just to nip to Disneyland for the day. It's like a 40-minute drive. Yeah, 40-minute Uber, guys, and you're in there. Yeah. It's really, really good. It's a great time. When did we go with summer? It must have been almost two years ago. Two years ago. We had a great time, the three of us. It was fabulous tonight. Disney adults living it up. Because I hate, shout out to the new Disney cruise ship that I saw last night. It's a brand new ship, Samia. Wow. I don't like roller coasters, but I did them all, didn't I?

4:07Did them all, yeah. It was a great time. Honestly, the best ride at Disneyland Paris, in my opinion, is the Crush ride. How fucking good was that? It's petrifying. No, that was awful. It was like way more intense of a roller coaster than I was expecting. Because it looks like it's just going to be serious when like the things are coming over your head and you're like, oh my God, I didn't realize it was this kind of ride. I mean, I love roller coasters. When they say take the ears off. Yeah, ears off. That was when you knew. I'm taking ears off. I've got to fucking... But my trick was, was I just closed my eyes and it did just feel like you were just kind of being flung a little bit.

4:43I love a roller coaster. Just jolted. And then you couldn't really... I couldn't really tell when I was upside down. Yeah, because it's quick. Yeah, but then I just think about the people... But you're not upside down on the crush ride. No, but that was... The crush ride is fantastic. No, we was... No, we weren't. No, we wasn't. But that was flunging, flying everywhere. It was so good. The whole premise was that you were a turtle on like the riptide. So I didn't even open my eyes. So I don't even know what was going on. You sat in like a big turtle shell. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it was two and two.

5:10So two people are facing backwards, two people are facing forwards. And you just go into like basically this like dark, massive room. So you can't really see like the twists and turns. And then there's this big climb and there's a shark's mouth below. Oh, it was brilliant. Was there a shark's mouth? Yeah, there was. You had your eyes closed. Scary. But I did it Happy Wednesday Happy September We're diving into X-Rated We are This is going to be Blueberry's very first X-Rated episode She's not heard these vulgarities yet She needs to cover her ears Because she's only a child She's only Oh my god, what's the date today?

5:48Is it her birthday? Yesterday it was her three month birthday She's growing right before our eyes She's actually getting big No, she is getting big I do want to know what she'll look like When she's like a teenager Yeah same Because everyone I meet I met people yesterday And they were like This is what my shih tzu puppy looked like When she was a puppy So it's like what's she going to look like When she grows She's definitely a crowd pleaser She gets a lot of attention in public People just want to take a picture of her She's a local celeb And she does love saying hello to people She's very friendly She just wants to greet everyone want yeah which is lovely lovely which is lovely because it makes me speak to people and be so sure it's nice all right guys let's dive in to our question of the week we are doing x rated episodes absolutely x rated episodes absolutely x rated dilemmas on the q of the w is sophia oh question of the week sorry my bad if yes you and your partner did role play who are you dressing up as and this was a serious question we asked we wanted serious serious answers we did and and so i believe you all took this seriously oh my god wait sorry i've just seen one incredible answers katniss and peter from the hunger games love that i honestly think That's really sexy.

7:18Get a third person in to play Gale. You know, a bit of jealousy in there, a bit of competition. I think you just need... Like the night before the Hunger Games starts, one last night of passion. Yeah, and then you could get the bow and arrow and go a bit crazy with the bow and arrow. Yeah, she scores. Absolutely. We've got here Lollipop Lady. If that's what floats his boat. Yeah. The Lollipop Lady. A little Lollipop Lady, yeah. She was a part of all of our lives. Yeah, she was part of everyone's lives in a little high viz. Yes. We've got my favourite movie, Shrek. absolutely bit of Shrek and Fiona action yes maybe even Lord Farquaad yes maybe even Prince Charming yes I mean I could see the role play being Shrek in his human form because what a man oh absolutely drop dead fucking gorgeous what a heartthrob he is he is absolutely gorgeous so I could see that for sure we've got oh comrade and belly little bit of foot guys I've started watching she's started hallelujah yes slow and steady.

8:17But you need to keep going. I appreciate that. Has there been First Contact? Can't even remember season one. No, I've just, I've watched two. All right, keep going. Yeah, I'll keep going. I need to lock in. You can scroll, like, just have it on. You can go on your phone, just as long as you're just getting through it. With a background noise. Yeah, just get through it. Yeah. An elf from Lord of the Rings. Yeah, absolutely. This lady just said, I really fancy my boyfriend dressed up as a squirrel. It's giving animalistic. If that floats her boat, then that floats her boat, Sophia. How squirrel-like are we going?

8:52She must like the furry furriness. Maybe she dresses up as an acorn. Yes. And then he's the squirrel. And then he can burrow into her. When the acorn's like running away and the squirrel's chasing it. Yes. Scooby-Doo. Love that. Velma, Daphne. Go for it. You know, Daphne and, is it Eric? Have I got that name wrong? They're still an item, like 23 years of match. Oh, what, in real life? Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. I was never a Scooby-Doo like, oh, Scooby-Doo. All right, well, we've got the classics here. The nurse, the policewoman, and the maid. Oh, the classics. Oh, yeah. They're the classic sexy Halloween dress-ups, aren't they?

9:32Yes. The sexy maid, the sexy policewoman. The sexy nurse. The sexy nurse. Attending to all your needs. See me now. Um, Elastigirl, yeah, I get that one. Who is Padme from Star Wars? Padme. Am I saying that right? Let's Google it. It's giving, I mean, it's not Princess Leia. Oh, oh, of course. Who? It's Thingyma Bobby. What's she called? Yeah. Um, Natalie Coleman? Natalie Portman. Natalie Portman. Look, there she is. Oh, gorgeous. Yeah, gorgeous gal. And we've got two here, two saying his mum because she seems to be his type. His mum, seeing as he loves her so much. And on that note. Well, Sabrina wrote a song about it.

10:17Which one? It's about the love house tour. It's when she says like, your son. It's about like the mother. I don't think I've listened to that. Yeah, you would love. It's like, you know, I can't remember it off the top of my head right now. do you want the house tour

10:40just before we get into it quick disclaimer just to say we are not doctors we are not professionals we do not actually know what we are talking about this is a light hearted space okay don't take what we say literally because we could be wrong yeah and if there's anything serious if there's anything you feel like you're seriously struggling with please contact a GP a professional because that is not us we're just girls girls and boys just like you we're just trying to get through life as well not professionals enjoy the episode enjoy right shall i take it away take it away where do we want to visit first do we want to visit fecal matter do we want to visit vaginas where do we want to go um or threesomes where do we want to what what direction do we want to go in um why don't we go whatever's calling you all right let's see what's speaking to me there yeah i quite like my boyfriend can't handle my vagina yeah he's scared of it he's scared of his he's very powerful powerful beings and they are intimidating because it's a portal you know life and wisdom it's a portal of beauty right and it needs a lot doing to it to make it function correctly yes absolutely it's it's a it's a complex it is a complex entity entity good and way more they're way more majestic than the penis yes monica told us one two three four seven six seven seven so sarah here says help my boyfriend can't handle my vagina and it appears we have attached pictures this is not appropriate blueberry stop licking yeah the protein girl okay Okay.

12:24What was that? Sorry I got distracted. Help. My boyfriend can't handle my vagina. He can't handle it. Maybe you need more of a man, Sarah. Someone who can handle the ins and outs. What can't he handle about it? He just needs to be coached. We're just going to read on. Hi, girls. Just want to start off by saying you've been my online best friends for years. Thank you, Sarah. Thank you, Sarah. I've listened to every single episode and I've recently joined the GC. So get more content and not be so lonely at my office job. also congrats on soon-to-be wife and new mummy i cried for hours at both these okay so my dilemma is my boyfriend cannot handle my vagina what a slay really like you can't handle this but she's unsatisfied she's been unsatisfied now for she says here for over a year i've been my boyfriend for over a year he's my he's my first boyfriend first sexual partner first everything basically basically he is amazing he is kind he is respectful he is funny and he fills up my water bottle before bed that is nice that's a lovely touch and it's just the perfect man for me in every way but whenever we have sex he comes so so quickly like super quick so quick too glorious yeah can your vagina ever be too wet can your vagina be too wet yeah like super quick so quick sometimes I think I think can that even be considered as having sex so it's the tale as old as time that we've had is that the simple the touch looking at it and it combusts we've had that many a time we've had a girl who hooked her boyfriend ended up with a wet belly wet belly button yes so we are long distance okay oh well he's not getting much practice yeah he's excited yeah um me and my boyfriend are long distance we live two and a half hours from each other he moved for a job opportunity at the beginning of a relationship and we make it work we both work through throughout the week and then make time for each other at the weekends which is honestly a great balance.

14:41It's lovely. We catch up on drama throughout the week, cuddles, have a date night, all that good stuff. But when it comes to night time, I've started to dread it. So what, we're seeing each other once a week at the weekend. I think we're seeing, we're spending the weekends together. Right. I'm thinking. Our routine goes movie, couple of kisses. Oh, it's very rehearsed, Sarah. Yeah. Couple of kisses, which turns into intense ravenous kisses. which inevitably gets his Peter Pecker wide awake. Not the Pecker, sorry, believe me. Peter Pecker. Obviously, we both have missed each other through the days we aren't together.

15:22So when we are together and specifically at nighttime, we are a bit feral to get our hands on each other. Love it. He's great at foreplay, knows what I like and how I like it. And I never usually have to hint or ask for him to go down on me as that's just what gets me going. However, when he's finished and trust me, so have I. I dread what happens after. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, what? So she's let us know before that he finishes really quick. Yeah. But she's satisfied. He's great at foreplay and knows what I like and how I like it. I never usually have to hint or ask him to go down on me as that's what usually gets me going.

16:07However, when he's finished and trust me, so have I. Okay. Okay, that's at least positive. I dread what happens after. What happens after? Obviously, it would be rude to roll over and go to sleep. He's just put in a shift to make me feel amazing. Oh, that's great. Why is it rude to go to sleep? And it's only right to return the favor. Right. What's happening here is, what's happening here is, they've not had sex yet. She's came. And she's like, he had to when he's finished working on her. Are we sure? Yes. Because listen, she's saying, look, I'm satisfied. You know, that got me going. Now I understand it's rude to roll over and go to sleep.

16:49She's like, I'm satisfied. I kind of want to roll over. But no, it's not my turn to return the favor. You know, he's just put a shift in to make me feel amazing. it's only right that I return the favor the thing is when we get to the sex okay it's so quick I almost don't ever want to anymore it's hassle and it's over before it even starts it's messy and the cleanup is just a ball ache for so little reward where is it going where is it everywhere it sounds like I'm talking it goes okay where does it go Sarah she says I'm talking it goes in we get a few thrusts in oh sorry oh and chinko de mayo peter pecker has got his release and this isn't just in one position it's in every position oh so she's tried it's not just like this one position where okay i've tried everything to make the sex last longer but nothing works i think you're getting him so excited the pussy power is too much i think you're getting him so excited when he's working on you and he's like dying he's about to explode and then and then all it takes is one little slip in and the volcano has erupted i've addressed this with him and he says it's just too good you can't blame me it's a compliment really yeah your pussy is just too good that's quote it's just too magical i mean love that for you but you know you want this got me thinking he has had one sexual partner before me his secondary school girlfriend and was he like this with her is he just a quick quicker ejaculator or is it actually me am I the issue is my vagina really causing sex issues for me what a betrayal if it is anyway my real issue is is I dread sex it's honestly a lot of faff for no reward he gets to come but I have I have never from sex from sex okay and it's just getting a bit boring now I thought he would I don't know get used to it by now but that doesn't seem like the case right like the excitement you know girls please what do I do when am I at loss I'm really struggling with this now I've attached pictures so you can see how sweet he is I could never break up with him especially over this but it has unfortunately crossed my mind thank you for all your help love you girls I don't think we need to break up do we well i mean sophia she's she doesn't want to have sex with a boyfriend yeah and she said like well can we and he's like it's just he needs to like he needs to right and looking at these but i'm gonna cry let's see it's him topless as well oh my god you know it's we've really got the full I know What a lovely couple Really lovely It's like a professional image There's definitely some sort of sepia filter on that He's got a lovely amount of body hair Yeah, a bit of chest hair He's giving Simon Cowell A little snail trail We've got another one You guys Gorgeous Oh guys, come on That's a beautiful picture We have to make this work That's mum and dad right there That's a beautiful picture Right, okay Okay, so...

20:12Why don't you just Google Chintz on your phone? Sophia, let's use her! It's all right. Let's use our... Sorry, Chintz's purple smoothie just almost went everywhere. Sorry, the purple smoothie. You know, I've already spilled another drink this morning as well, so that's not good for me. Okay, so you need to try... Let's use our imaginations. Brian needs to basically last longer, is what you're struggling with. We actually need to ask a man. Stuart? He's great at foreplay. You have great chemistry. Yes, this is great. That's good. He's a lovely boyfriend. She said they were eating each other's faces.

20:44Yeah, great make-out sessions. You just, when you have sex, you just want the sex to last longer. So are some men willies just more sensitive? They are, right? Some willies can handle more sensitivity than others, right? Yeah, I suppose so. But can't men hold it in for a little bit? I may be thinking. I thought they could control it. I know you have spoke to him about this, but my mind initially went to him being like, okay, well, like I've sorted her out. Like she's finished and now this is for me. And I think he's not seeing the importance of the actual sex. He's thinking she's came. Yeah. Brilliant.

21:22Oh God, put that shift in. Tick. Satisfied girlfriend. Now it's my turn. Yeah. And he's just like, whoa. Whoa. He's just like, whoa. Mind blown. This is amazing. And he wants to get back to watch him find a email or whatever. Yeah. Um, so you need to sit him down and you need to say, look, baby, you know, the foreplay is amazing. It's amazing. It blows my mind every single time. Sorry. It blows my mind every single time. You know, it's fantastic. However, I would just love us to be able. I think she's had this conversation. Well, she said I've spoke to him. can you express the importance of you actually wanting he needs to start thinking of like his grandma or something in the moment because he needs to just slow he needs to go to his father dad don't me or man to man man to man serious chats bro he needs to maybe ask his mate he needs to because i don't really know he's just like just just try and slow down a little bit but he sounds like it says she says it's too thrust he is slowed down babes well then he needs to just like take it away for a moment and yeah but no but then i feel just and like it would just like we need to actually you know what we need to do is actually look at the anatomy of the penis is there a toy is there some sort of like pump stopper thing that would i fear the excitement on that will just make them go even make them go even crazier if you're pumping it i don't know if it would be some sort of like when you pump the willy doesn't it what does it do i think there's an enlarger you can naturally enlarge it that's i thought filling it up with air if you want to do that i thought you have to like swelling suffocate it right you know castrate no is that not the word different territory because um you can put the willy in um jail we've seen the the i thought it was the vagina that went in jail the jail pants well there's also the with the the penis jail i I didn't know that was a penis jail.

23:29I was literally locked up. Wow. In a little mini jail. Maybe his needs to go in jail. Maybe, but I fear that'll get him too excited. Even more. Right, he needs to ask his friends, lads. Fellas. Fellas, boys. Fellow cum men. Fellow semen. Fellow men with semen, yeah? How to, my missus, my missus, my other half. My missus. You know, Becky, Becky. You know, I sort her out. Like man to man. Yeah. Because I fear you've tried. Just let him know again. Look, I really want the sex to last longer. How can we work together as a team from start to finish? It's just because you're so sexy, Sarah. It's a compliment.

24:09You know, when you said your pussy is just too shit. But I appreciate that you are not having a good time. I think if it's got to the point where you are like actually dreading having sex. That's not good. That's not a nice point to be at. And also she's considered breaking it with him. That's actually serious. Yeah, that's actually serious. Because I want you to have a lovely, you know, sensual time. Yes. You know, when to become one in the bedroom. I'm just going to give you a quick Google just to see if we can get some. Should I quickly just ask Mark? Yeah, that's a good idea. The master of willies.

24:38The master of semen. I'll just quickly say, Mark. Make sure you do the right Mark. We have the hairdresser called Mark and an accountant called Mark. So we must make sure it's the right Mark. Well, I'm ignoring a message from the account of Mark right now, so I'll make sure I click on that. Yeah. Sorry, Mark. Archive. Hi, Mark. This is the correct Mark. Mark, quick cue for pod. How can a man last longer in bed before finishing? ah okay i've got some right i've asked mark yeah let's see what google says i mean there's such a thing as premature ejaculation how to last longer in bed but just the quick google is telling me distract yourself while having sex try the stop start technique that's that exactly it's all mental for him isn't it just before ejaculating and wait until the feeling has passed before starting again.

25:50He's going to explode. Use a thicker condom or condoms with numbing agents to reduce sensitivity and prevent premature ejaculation. There you go, science. That's like a legit tip. Okay. I mean, Superdrug Online has got a whole article about it. Okay. There we go, Superdrug. Yeah, he needs to distract himself when he's in the moment. He needs to think of other things. He needs to start thinking about other things. Yeah. Because can't men, I thought they could get in the zone and control it. Ah. Changing your sexual habits can reset what happens when you have sex if you suffer with premature ejaculation.

26:25Here we go. To help you last longer in bed, you can. Right, listen up, Brian. This is an easy fix. Masturbate one or two hours before sex. Oh, of course. Slow down when you have sex. Also, my thoughts is, is he masturbating while you're not together to release some of it? I know. Is he holding everything in and then he's exploding instantly? I think maybe he's just waiting for the weekend and then he's so backed up his balls. Blue. Distract yourself while having sex. Try the start-stop technique. Trying different positions. She's done that. Spend more time on foreplay, but you do that. And then the thicker condom thing.

27:08honestly probably maybe the masturbation is a good tip yeah because maybe he yeah he's like no i want to like save myself yeah my girlfriend yeah but actually maybe it's counterproductive and actually maybe you should encourage him to like isn't it like science that they actually need to you know release the you know because it's like when you breastfeed and your boobs get the milk's got to get out isn't it just like that they need to release it needs to be released otherwise i think can get quite painful. Yeah. Yeah. Looks a little veiny and stuff. Well, we'll let you know if we hear back from Mark.

27:42But I think we've when Mark gets back. Mark is the master of, you know, penises. Yes. I mean, we've not lived from first-hand experience. But we hear things. Absolutely. Hello, I'm Monica Reinagle, host of the Nutrition Diva podcast. Summer is here and with it, the hot and sticky weather. A morning working in the garden or maybe on the golf course, can leave you more depleted than you realize. And plain water isn't always the most efficient way to restore the balance. That's where Liquid IV comes in. Its science-backed formula is clinically proven to hydrate faster than water alone. Whether you're exercising, playing outside, or simply surviving a summer heat wave, it's an easy way to stay hydrated.

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29:12Okay, we're going to the opposite end of the spectrum Absolutely we are Help, I shit myself during sex Maybe we went to the seafood boil a bit too close Fucking hell yeah Because when that's ready it's ready to go does that sentence mean she does it multiple times or just for an off time because it sounds like maybe she just can't i'm thinking maybe it's a like i'm just so how do i face sex again because i've shit myself with the same person maybe let's find out about three months ago an old situation ship popped up asking me to see him we slept together once about two years ago. Oh, okay. Quite exciting.

29:56Yes. What have you learned in the two years that we've been apart? To be thought of again. To be summoned. Yes. To be called upon. Before I left, I needed a nervous poo. Natural. Nervous poos, nervous shmoos. I know a lot about nervous poos. Which is quite normal for me and I drove to his. Okay, so did you not have your poo? It doesn't sound like you had your poo. That's, that's... I think she had a bit of a poo, but not all of it maybe. She's saying I needed a nervous poo. Oh, sorry, I missed that. Okay. He got straight down to it because he only had about an hour before everyone was coming home.

30:33Who's that? What, the family? God. Whilst he was using his fingers, he was pushing down on my stomach. Okay. And then he looked at me and goes, Shut up. No, shut up. I think you just shit. No. and I had I have sorry so we're at just early early foreplay here it's just a finger that's been entered inside I really just put myself in that moment that it's me and he's gone I think you've just shit on the bed why was he pushing down on your stomach like that I don't know what was he expecting like I would also piss if anyone's pushing down on my belly like I will weigh yeah maybe it's a technique that he has he was so loose and relaxed that it just you know you weren't tense at all you just slipped right back into old times you let it all go and you just relaxed everything from the neck down okay oh god I have never I've got goosebumps me too I've never I've actually got goosebumps yeah ever had anything so mortifying happen in my life no I didn't even realise it had happened now that's interesting Sarah it just slid out yeah she was so relaxed honestly how do you not know that shit has come out out of your ass.

31:48She was being stimulated in other areas. In other areas. And she was not like, because you know like when you're on like clenching. Yeah. And when you're holding in farts you're like clenching, holding in booze and stuff. Yeah. You're like tense. Tense. She just released it all. Relaxed. And you were distracted. Yeah, she was distracted. Definitely. Okay. She was remembering how good it was. I wonder what the consistency was because I'm thinking it was. It must have had a looser texture. her i'm sure yeah so i didn't even realize i would say almost there i didn't even realize it happened he was so nice about it and got me stuff to clean up

32:31oh you poor thing but i felt so i couldn't even look at my own shit like on a bed sheet with a boy that i've not seen in two years who i've drove over for a sex appointment and it's It's only just begun. And it's not even like I have accidentally shat on your bed, but you don't realise and I've got time to like, I don't know, sort it out. You have noticed my shit and you've actually told me to my face with your fingers inside me, you've just shit. And now we're both looking at the shit on the bed. And then you've gone, don't worry, here's some tissue. I couldn't. I actually couldn't. No. I offered to buy new sheets But he was adamant it was okay So I quickly got dressed and left How much did it stay, Sarah?

33:17I'm also thinking about the smell as well, you know Aw, bless her She said I then had an upset tummy for four days afterwards So she was genuinely ill Sounds like food poisoning, Sarah, maybe Yeah, do you know what? Because you can't control it when, like, you can't and so like when you've got to go you've got you've got to go when nature comes knocking you know however i am now too scared to have sex with another guy in case it happens again it's okay i cannot go over this fear the end we can sarah we can we can do this 100 percent you were ill you were ill you had an upset but it would happen to the best it sounds like you actually had a bug yeah i'm like thank god it wasn't you know sick and shit yeah everything at the same time yes you know you know what he could you know what he reacted in the best way possible yeah he said look let me get some tissue no honestly don't worry about it no worries just get out i bet he shit is overhead before he's like just get out yeah just leave but you could have gone what the fuck is this you're fucking discussing it the fucker you know he could have really he was pretty calm i think he was really calm and collected and we can just but never happened i think we move on with our lives honestly i probably don't think he's even going to tell anyone about it either.

34:36Yeah, I wouldn't even worry about that. If a man pooed in my bed, I don't even know if I could tell anyone. Really? You'd probably tell it on this podcast. Yeah, probably. I forgot I had this platform. I don't think I would tell anyone. Next week, oh my God, Sarah, what I had wanted. If I didn't have a podcast that spoke about sex and relationships, I don't think I'd be so mortified. Really? I'd have to tell someone. I'd be like, you never guessed what. Not to make you feel bad, Sarah. but I would tell a friend. I guess, I guess, I guess, I guess. I think maybe, maybe next time we have sexual intercourse, let's do it in the dark.

35:15Also. Just to get over that initial first time. And let's do it in our own bed, you know, in our own environment. I think, watch what you're eating for a week prior, you know, watch what you eat. Lay off spicy things. No bran flakes. Let's lay off fibre. No brown bread. Let's almost back ourselves up. Why don't we just take some Imodium? Yeah, let's get constipated as fuck. Yeah, let's just... No, but then it can hurt, can't it? Yeah, but it will just, you know... Yeah. No coffee that day, Jesus. Yeah, no laxative-esque things. And then, like you said, you try to have that nervous poo and you didn't have it before.

35:51Let's just make sure we're pooing before. Let's just make sure. That's it. Simple fix, Sarah. You've got this. Yeah. And I almost think... I think you'll forget about it. So do I. The next time you're really attracted to a man and you want to have sex with him, You'll forget about it. It's not like every single time you have sex, you can't help but shit yourself. This was a one-time occurrence because you were ill. It happens to the best of us. And just tell yourself, like, who cares? It's only embarrassing if I let myself be embarrassed. Like, I'm not embarrassed. Who cares? I don't even really know this guy.

36:20I've not seen him in two years. Like, I'm over it. Everyone poos as well. Everyone poos. It's a healthy thing. It's healthy bowel movements. It's good to be pooing. Some people can't poo. Yeah. Some people have paralyzed stomachs and they can't poo. and they have to go to the hospital, you know? They have operations. So, you know, let's be grateful that we can move things. Silver linings. You know? I think all it will take is, you just need to have sex one more time. Yeah, you're fine. And it will be a distant memory. Maybe you can tell that story on your wedding day. Like that's how far I think you're going to come and you're going to overcome it.

36:54And I think you'll be able to look back and laugh at it and like tell the story in front of everyone you know. Everyone, you too. On the mic. Including your new husband. On your cue cards. Yeah, I do think. It's a fantastic story to tell. Thank you for sharing, Sarah. Be proud of it. Be proud of it.

37:15Right. Now, Sophia, do you know what a sex tale is? A sex tale? Because I thought that was a typo. I thought it was going to say sex tape. Or maybe it is. Do you think this is a typo? Possibly. Because Sarah said, my boyfriend made sex tales. Because that's giving poetry to me. It's sounding like they sit down and write this incredible sex story together. A tale as old as time. Yeah, and then act it out together. Is that what a sex tale is? I don't know. With his ex, but won't kiss me. Hi, girls. I love the pod. Me and my bestie watch it religiously together every week at uni. Thank you, Sarah.

37:54Thank you, ladies. Sorry if this is a bit all over the place. I don't really know what to make in this situation. Just getting straight into it. Perfect. Me and my boyfriend, Brian, had been together for seven months. And when I first met him, I thought I had finally found the right guy for me. We met in October of last year and made it official this January. Up until two months ago, everything was perfect. We had such a good connection. Our friend groups all got on. I met him through my bestie's boyfriend. So that was all lovely. And we would always hang out with my two flatmates and their boyfriends We always went on dates, nights out We never really had an issue apart from meaningless bickers on a night out Safe to say we were very much in the honeymoon phase But I had never felt this way about anyone I'd been with in the past I don't trust easily but trusted him instantly Aw, happy for you Sarah However Sounds great The honeymoon phase ended as I graduated uni and moved home For reference, we used to live 15 minutes away from each other But now we live an hour and a half away from each other Oh, that's tough I got a full-time job straight after uni And as soon as I moved home, the vibes were just off Oh, there's nothing worse You know what, there's nothing worse than a guy who just switches up on you like that Lydia's got a friend right now Who, she's had this boyfriend, he's just being mean to her he's just being mean to her right now go away all this nasty shit when she's trying to finish her uni work she's really trying to lock down and write her dissertation and she's got this boyfriend who they he was once obsessed with her and now it's like go away like upsetting her in such a critical time of her life when she's got to write her dissertation isn't that so horrible yeah there's nothing worse than that feeling of like you're texting different you're being different you're being really cold and you're being really off and I'm asking you what's wrong but you're telling me nothing's wrong so maybe I'm overthinking it but you're just different and I just know it and like yeah you are being mean to me and you are like making me feel a bit shit but I'm making excuses for you because like you were once a nice version of yourself yeah it's horrible it's a horrible and you just push it yeah it's the worst and then it's like also when you realize oh my god like my good mood has been reliant upon this man because my mood is depicted on him yeah and like how he holds the power and then it's like how have i got here to this point where this man who i didn't even know eight months ago is now making me cry and like i'm having a shit day because he's being off with me fucking when i didn't even know him let's not let ourselves get to that point again right so so you've now moved an hour and a half away we're seven months in and things are changing a little bit.

40:43She's just saying the vibes are off. As soon as I moved home, he switched up on me. Okay. We went out for my friend's birthday and had a massive argument when we were out and he basically stormed off and didn't speak to me all night then made out like I was being dramatic. Oh my God. Yeah. The following week, we barely spoke and when we did, we were just arguing. We eventually figured this out but compared to how we were before, it seemed like a big contrast. I'd never really seen that side to him before. that's always a scary moment that is always a scary moment i've not seen when you see like the person who you thought you knew like in you're like oh my god who is that like i don't recognize this side of you like this is so scary to me like you have two personalities it's always a scary yeah when you're treating me different yeah so this is what's going on how did we get here yeah it came across to me and others that were there as jealousy as I got on a job okay yeah Taylor's oldest time there's nothing the last thing we need as women is a man by our side who is jealous of us for our accomplishments and achievements what do we say chintz he hates you yeah he hates you he hates you so imagine that we've got a boyfriend who hates us what the fuck is that all about hates you like just because he's a saboteur just because I'm doing well and I got a job and you know, you haven't.

42:10Now you hate me and you're jealous of me. Yeah. Because we met on this very level playing field. Exactly that. They can't handle it. Or we both had the same job. And now all of a sudden, like, well, I'm actually not like a poor student anymore. Like I'm actually got an income. I've got a salary. I'm making new friends at work. I feel like I'm in adulthood now. Like I'm using my degree. I've got this job. I've got responsibilities. I've got a bit of a paycheck. Like I want to do things at the weekend, but you're maybe still in like student mode and you're just jealous of me. Then you're taking it out on me and treating me differently when I've done nothing wrong.

42:44I've done nothing wrong. But because you're so unhappy with what you've got going on and I'm thriving, you want to pull me down to be at your level because I'm climbing, climbing, thriving, thriving and you want to knock me off my pedestal a little bit and make me feel shit because you feel shit. Yeah. Taylor's oldest time. So your friends have hit the nail on the head with that saying that he's jealous. which is good because I'm glad that you know you're you're realizing so it came across to me and the others that there was jealousy as I got on a job straight out of uni and he graduated last year and hasn't found anything yet also nothing wrong with that Brian though no wrong with that like you're just he's comparing himself he's not happy for you but it's like you're just at your own pace Brian like you're in a different line of work like we're not doing the same thing like yeah you there's no need to take it out on me or girlfriend who you love no you should find it Like inspiring, motivational.

43:35You should be happy for me. You should be championing me. Championing me. Yeah. And being a cheerleader, not like trying to bring me down. No. Yeah, he's jealous of you. And he just can't handle it. And yeah, not good. Since working full time, it seems as though he has been very distant and has been putting less effort into dates and just general life, etc. Oh my God. This is your boyfriend, by the way. And she said taking five plus hours to reply to a text. Huh? Five plus hours. I'm your girlfriend. I'm not someone you don't know. Like, who do you think? Hot and cold, hot and cold. Hot and cold.

44:12It's like, you're my boyfriend. It's not normal. Not being very enthusiastic or encouraging when I tell him good news regarding my job and general life. We have spoken about this previously, but it would always be me initiating the conversation. And although he would make more of an effort for a couple of weeks, it would it would revert back pretty quickly i've been reflecting on my part in this and how i could help the relationship i've just remembered the sex tale the the title of this so have i and what is the title he won't kiss me sex tales with his ex oh my god i just forgot what the yeah right so i've been reflecting um very very um self-aware of you sarah to reflect i'm reflecting on my part in this and how I could help the relationship and have been doing everything I can as it is a hard transition yeah it is like you've both gone through a lot you know it's a hard transition going from uni to the working wheel moving back home now a long distance so we could try and give him some benefit of the doubt but nothing warrants treating me no you hate me you're jealous of me however I'm doing everything I can to think of to make this better and I can't think of what else I can do you've tried Sarah I know one of his love languages is physical touch and we do cuddle and he is affectionate but if I didn't initiate a kiss or sex we would go the whole we we would go without the whole time with we're with each other um like we wouldn't have any sort of intimacy when I try to initiate sex he pulls away or makes an excuse to leave the room oh so we actually you're not having sex you are cuddling but you're not having sex I get it could be awkward as I do live with my family but this was never an issue when we stayed at his when I was at uni it's been months since we've had sex that when I tried to bring it up he changes the subject quickly the first you know when you want to break up with someone the first thing that goes is the sex yeah unfortunately and the whole thing is making me feel like he doesn't find me attractive or desirable especially after hearing stories from his friends of what he did in past relationships why the hell are you making sex about what he did in past relationships in it making sex takes i think she's misspelled tapes twice yeah and she's got tails tape she's put we are looking for yeah tapes i know yeah i believe it is sex tapes yes so you've you've heard from through the great vine that he's made sex tapes in the past about his old escapades yeah also like guys why are you chatting about that while i'm here that's so disrespectful yeah that's an interesting i don't Everything he is doing is starting to irritate me and I don't feel any sort of connection anymore.

46:56It's done them. Sack him off. And I don't know what went wrong. I am the kind of person that addresses issues quickly and wants to resolve it straight away. So situations like this can be avoided. But it's becoming clear that we have very different styles of communication and I don't know how to fix this if he isn't able to have an open conversation. I don't want to break up with him and can't imagine not being with him. Cheesy, I know, to say after less than a year. but it's getting to a point where it's starting to make me anxious and stressed and question if he does actually like me and if he wants to be with me imagine that you've got a boyfriend and you're questioning whether he wants to be with you yeah but you should never or if he likes you should never feel like that in a relationship but i see how you've got here sarah because it's a very slow thing it is but if we isolate like you just saying does he even like he's your boyfriend every year like we should never have to question that should we and we should never have to be like I need to be on my best behavior and just being an amazing girlfriend and doing all these things and loving and loving and loving and loving just to make sure that I'm still in his good books what can I do what can I do what's he been doing recently to make sure that you love him like what effort has he been making to make you feel like good and confident and like he's in this with you like it's not just shouldn't just be you begging for his love because what if like you're having a bad day and you're a bit off like well yeah this is we're a team like it takes two to tango like i have to put in effort yes and you also have to put in effort like um but it's getting to a point where it's making me anxious and stressed and i question i've read that haven't i um and if he wants to be with me as i feel as well let me read that again but it's getting to a point where it's starting to make me anxious and stressed and question if he does actually like me and if he wants to be with me as i feel he would say if he didn't because he doesn't really communicate very well any advice would be appreciated girls please a very confused sarah sarah i think this guy is holding you back there that's the word i think he's pulling you down and i think it's one of those instances he's not mature enough either like i think you've come on leaps and bounds your life is going in an incredible direction you've got so much ahead of you and he unfortunately yeah I just I just think he's dragging you down I don't think he's very happy for you and I think it's one of those instances where sorry I've just lost my whole train of thought he can't handle it like yeah he doesn't want to see you shining and doing well Only if he is as well, I guess, would he be okay with you?

49:41And it is a weird thing that like men do and women do it sometimes. Like they will just start being like not nice to their partner so that their partner then breaks up with them. It's almost like they like, it doesn't really sound to be honest, like he wants to be with you anymore. And I don't think you should normalize the feeling of like not knowing if your boyfriend likes you. You feel stressed. You feel anxious. like your mood depends on like if he's in a good mood with you like it that should not be the norm you shouldn't be questioning these things about your partner and I think it sounds like to me he's being shit he knows he's being shit he's being really distant he's being really cold and you know he kind of he's getting all this attention from you because you're kind of like pining for him like oh what can I do I'm trying to be the best girlfriend ever like I'm trying to do this trying to do that.

50:31Like we've all been in that situation, but I think he's just being a twat. And I think it's almost like he wants you to break up with him so that he doesn't have to do the breakup himself. And then he can be like, oh, well, she broke up with me. Like it wasn't my decision. Like he doesn't almost want the responsibility of making the decision because yeah, you've had good times, but it's, you need to look at the reality of your relationship. Like, yes we've been together for you know seven eight whatever months like those initial few months were great you can have a great initial few months with anyone like it's not hard to have a great few months with anyone but if eight months down the line things aren't that way anymore like i'm not gonna fight you know to get back there because that's not and you've literally tried you've tried to speak to him multiple times like if all you had was the last like month of your relationship you'd be like oh well i'd want to be with someone like this he's miserable he's not nice to me he leaves me on red for five hours he doesn't really seem that happy to me he doesn't have time for me no i'm not gonna be with this guy like i'm gonna break up with him what's the i don't know he's he's he's clingy he's ugly he's not the time for me warden the fucked up it's about pulling away i can't yeah he is don't know the lyrics were but for words gets it's only been out a week or so he is pulling away and i think you can do better and also he's been pushing you away either to get you to break up with him which is fucking shit because if you don't want to be with me stand up and break up with me i know but they're pussies they can't yeah or because you're trying to push me down because i'm doing so well i've got a job i'm making money and you're not none of these things none of these things should equal yeah you please be my boyfriend no You don't want to be with someone who has those traits and has those feelings towards you.

52:23And it's a hard realisation and it's shit because like you know that you can have a good time with this person, but they're not that person anymore. And I just think you'd be doing yourself a disservice by like fighting for this man's love. Like you shouldn't have to like beg and plead and fight for attention and love and like, oh, let's hope he's in a good mood because then I'll be really happy. Like, no, like I think you've almost like, you've got used to this like shitty boyfriend behavior. And I think you will experience again, like you will meet someone incredible and you'll be like, oh my God, like what the hell was I doing with that guy?

52:59I had no idea. But like you go through these things in life. This is what relationships are for. Like you live and you learn, you know what to look out for next time. And you know what you don't want now. You want a cheerleader. You want someone who's going to support you, be happy for you. And at the end of the day, if you're ever having a problem in your relationship or something that's concerning you, you should be able to go to your boyfriend or your partner and say, hey, I didn't like when this happened. Like, can we talk about it and fix it? And then they should go, oh, yeah, let's talk about it.

53:31Oh, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, fix, fix, fix. And then we should be able to move on and it's fixed and we're moving forward. This man can't even talk to you. We can't even discuss, you know, even the sex thing is an isolated incident. you're saying hey like we've not had sex in a couple months he's like just not he doesn't even want to talk about it it's like this is not a relationship you know if we can't talk about things so you're not making each other happy no and i think it's a slow realization when you realize that your first kind of proper boyfriend is like oh my god he's actually sure we've both been there yeah and i think you're realizing it now and you have to stop making excuses for these people because it's very easy to it's very easy to stay and you could be with this guy probably two years but you will get sick of this you could plod along for another six months i'm sure yeah you will get sick of it it will just start to wear you down even more and also like in your new job like new people you're meeting thinking oh like oh sarah's boyfriend doesn't do this yeah oh i've heard that emma's boyfriend is you know doing that really nice thing for her and he's really funny and like you know and then you will start to realize oh this guy actually this is not normal for a boyfriend to treat me like this yeah and there are other people in the world yes how many seven billion absolutely is that correct i don't think so right should we do one more yes good luck sarah you've got this

54:58okay last one here to threesome or not to threesome it's like um here we go shakespeare Yes, to be or not to be That is the question You know what we need to watch We are the Montagues and we rule Verona Yeah, and do you know what the storyline is to Heathcliff Whoa, sorry You know, come on, from France, Heathcliff and the Meadows Beg your pardon? Think, think, think What's this a reference from? Friends Friends, Heathcliff I remember when Phoebe goes to the book club with Rachel and she's like they represent the Moors from Heathcliff oh yeah the Moors what's that film what's that book called because it's coming out Margot Robbie and Jacob Lordy and they're the book from the Friends Book Club was it Wuthering Heights do you know what happens in Wuthering Heights no I don't neither do I we should be reading we need to educate ourselves because the new film is coming out with Jacob Lordy and Margot Robbie but people aren't happy about it oh yeah okay well sorry that's just what that reminded me of threesome or not to threesome hey girls i've been listening to your podcast it's the very beginning oh wow and i saw that you wanted some more x-rated dilemmas so i thought i'd write in thank you i am 23 and my brian is 22 we've been together for two years today is actually our two-year anniversary happy anniversary guys I'm so happy, Annie.

56:32I can honestly say he's the best boyfriend ever. He is such a golden retriever, so emotionally supportive, masculine in a non-toxic way, just a walking green flag. We've already talked about our future, getting married, and we know we want to be together for the rest of our lives. Oh my gosh. Recently, this is coming back to the question of the week, we were discussing our sexual fantasies. I've been thinking about the idea of a threesome for a very long time now, but I never took it too seriously. The idea of being pleased by not one, but two people who are very attracted to me at the same time is very appealing.

57:10I also almost always imagined it with two men. Despite it being a fantasy of mine, I am very much okay with never experiencing it because I know that sometimes it's better if some things stay a fantasy. Don't meet your heroes and all that. When I mentioned this to my boyfriend, he was surprised, but not in a bad way. we discovered that he also had the same kind of curiosity as me. But he did. We kind of started discussing the logistics and rules that would have to be in place in case we ever actually would have a threesome. I like that, Sarah. This is positive. This is fantastic. You know, you're taking it seriously and trying to protect the relationship.

57:50I like it a lot. And, you know, manage the fantasy and make it a reality. But, yeah. For example, we agreed the third person would have to be someone bisexual who is attracted to both of us so that neither of us felt left out. Plus neither of us is strictly heterosexual. So it could be interesting to explore our sexuality a little bit. Another thing is I'm not really someone who can just have sex with anyone. So the third person would have to be someone we know and trust. That's interesting because usually I feel like most people want a random stranger who's not in our lives. And we can keep this kind of of like, oh, we don't see them regularly.

58:31So it's interesting that you want someone that you know. Yeah, it is. We have a mutual friend who's a girl who has previously expressed interest in me in a very teasing and joking way. Okay, perfect candidate. Step up to the plate, Sarah. Single lady, reveal yourself. Absolutely. Since we both know her, she is a very strong contender for our third person. Okay. Honestly, if we asked her, I'm about 90 % sure she would say yes. Get it, get it. If we wanted to have a threesome with a guy, I have a classmate from uni who I think might be bisexual. Him and I have very strong chemistry, but I never crossed a line because I'm in a relationship.

59:11I can't say if he would be interested though. And we're definitely not as close with the mutual girlfriend. Plus my Brian doesn't know him. I'm completely torn on what to do. I absolutely love my relationship with Brian the way it is. and he assures me that he does too. He said that even if we never end up having a threesome, he's completely fine with it and is eager to explore all the things we haven't even explored together yet as a couple. I'm terrified the threesome could mess it up. We are otherwise strictly monogamous and I do kind of worry that I would struggle a bit with the jealousy aspect if we were to bring another girl into the bedroom.

59:53Okay, okay. As I'm sure he would if it were to be another guy. Yeah. You know how the saying goes, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Yeah. On the other hand, it seems like we are young and there won't be a good opportunity for this in the future. Maybe it could bring us closer in ways that something else couldn't. I'd love to hear your girls' thoughts. Here's pics of me and Brian. Thanks, Sarah. Such a dapper. Look at this picture. A lovely couple. Oh, you guys. A lovely couple celebrating each other's achievements. Is there more? shut up you guys you guys so gorgeous right what's your instinct because i was really thinking okay you're talking about the rules regulations taking it seriously how are we going to make each other feel comfortable and secure what are our boundaries do this you know boundaries and do this so that we're both happy and you know doesn't cause any friction issues but then you say but then you say like the jealousy thing sarah i guess that's a normal and natural thing to feel like if you were going into a threesome with your boyfriend with another female i'm sure that is a natural normal thing to feel me too it's like oh that's unusual that you're snogging up and kissing up on that girl that's not me and you seem to be having a good handle that i don't know so can just really sit with that don't rush into it really sit with like can i handle brian being intimate with another woman in front of my eyes and am i able to then would that bring me pleasure because that's what it's about yeah like if that's going to cause you is that going to turn me on is that going to make me feel good am i going to enjoy watching that yeah i think sit with those are your questions because the last thing we need is like that happens it rouse you up it pisses you off you don't enjoy it as much because brian's into the girl and he's having a great time with her you're thinking whoa whoa whoa yeah and then the next day we're arguing about it yeah because he seemed a bit too into it with the other girl you were having a good time with you know shit like that like that's what we don't need because maybe the fantasy is just like Like you said, like another guy in, two guys pleasuring you.

1:02:22But then I guess if the girl is pleasuring you as well, you'd really have to brief the girl and be like, you need to spend equal amounts of time on both of us. I know. We need to have a meeting before. Seriously, because we need to make sure that this is going to go swimmingly. I know. But then talk to Brian about these feelings. Like, oh, Brian, I'm not sure how I'm going to feel when I see you snogging up on Susan. Yes. I like that because I'm sure he's gonna be having similar thoughts yeah because you're really open like express him how I think the communication is great yeah we need to keep going down this route yeah but yeah like Chintz said I just until you are 100 % yeah I just wouldn't rush no because like that third person is not going anywhere there is no rush I think like keep talking about it keep thinking about it like keep kind of like oh entertaining the idea yeah but it's not something you can go back on no and i i would be the same i would be like i'm worried that i'm not gonna be able to look at you the same after i've watched you snog someone else does it get you going sarah's the thought of watching him snogging someone else because if it doesn't then i don't think this is yeah me neither like he needs to be really turned on watching you with someone else yeah and you need to be really turned on watching him with someone else because there are going to be moments where like you're more watching or he's more watching or yeah there's going to be times when all three of us are all involved but there will be moments of like someone's observing something yeah so i would just sit with it chat about it before we pull but it sounds like you're in the right direction it does like this is your fantasy this is his fantasy let's try and get it going yeah let's try and make it happen but are some things like not meant that's why i feel like like followed through with do you know what i mean like could it should it stay a fantasy should it just stay a fantasy because it's like is this just gonna cause a problem am i gonna be able to handle that I don't know I can handle it that's why maybe I'm thinking like maybe it does need to be a stranger because my my only concern I know but she says she wants to feel comfortable with someone that she knows but yeah that's like my only concern is it being someone that we mutually kind of like know and then what if they want to do it again and again and again and now she's got feelings for your brand I don't know like what if we just we're gonna see them like out and about or if we mutually know them, like it's, I don't know.

1:04:44I just feel like it would be, I don't know. Well, because it's like - A stranger feels more appealing to me. With a stranger. Like they come in, neither of us know them because then afterwards we're chatting about, oh my God, that person was blah, blah, blah. And then they leave. We never see them again. Yeah, because I'm fearful of, if it's someone you know, they had a really great time, they want to do it again. Okay, let's do it a second time. Yeah, nice. But then that's quite good to have your threesome person, to have your side third person. But then what if feelings start to get involved naturally?

1:05:14If you're sleeping with someone else regularly, you're going to start growing attached. Feelings are going to start to grow, surely. What if we're doing that for six months? Your fantasy was that it would be two men. Yep. Your initial fantasy was two men. That is very different to a man and a woman. That's your boyfriend and you and another girl, which is very different. But she's happy to explore herself with another woman too. Just sit with it. Talk about it more. Really don't rush into it. Way up the pros and cons. Really like try and have a vivid dream about watching Brian with Susan. Really sit with your imagination.

1:05:53And sit with that. And how does that make you feel? Also talk to Brian about it. Yeah. Keep it going. Keep the conversation going. But I wouldn't do it on a question mark. Yeah. Because also the fact that you're questioning whether it's going to cause problems is maybe you thinking that I think that might cause a problem yeah you know yes right but but bon chance you know all the best of luck three is a crowd absolutely yes right should we find oh a star of the week yes please oh mark's replied just in time mark has replied he said he absolutely He said what Google said. He said quite simply, have a wank beforehand.

1:06:38Thanks, Mark. He said, come twice, question mark. Oh, can he come twice? Yeah. Of course. He said, a condom, so less sensitive. Yeah. And think about his mum. Perfect. Yeah, that's exactly what we said. Straight from the horse's mouth. We said, distract yourself with your thoughts. We said the condom thing and we said, have a wank before. So we are just tuned in. We're doing a good job today. Woo-hoo. Right, let us finish off today. with our Brian of the Week. Let's restore our faith in the male species. Okay. Oh my God. I've seen a picture of the happy couple. Right, Brian of the Week. What a lovely beard he's got.

1:07:16Honestly, a great couple. You match really well. You really do. Both in your navy tops. Oh, so we've got Hello, girly pops. Hope you're both well. I would like to nominate my handsome man to be Brian of the Week. Being the amazing man that he is, he is booked a week away for us both to Kefalonia. Kefalonia, Captain Corelli's mandolin. With one week notice, a beautiful island. And because I don't have any annual leave left, he's also paying for my week wage I miss out on. Brian! A paycheck and a holiday. Paid for everything on the holiday. It's honestly been the best trip as I'm writing this set on the beach.

1:07:56Wow! He plays mermaids in the pool and isn't a boring boy. he's also coordinated his outfits to mine hence the magic navy of course we love him and is my personal photographer what else could a girl want i've attached a picture of us both lots of love and you're a great couple see i feel like uh sarah with the shit boyfriend needs to really hear this brian of the week yes to restore her faith like the other men are great this man booked a surprise trip at a week's notice. She's took it off work. He's paying for her week's wait. She's on a free trip and also getting paid. Oh, Brian, thank you for looking after and for treating our Sarah this week.

1:08:39We appreciate it. And he takes pictures of her on holiday. Thank God. As he should. As he should. Yay. She's got to earn his keep. Literally. Right. All right, guys. Thank you so much for listening to this week's X-Rated episode. If you would like to email on your dilemmas, you can do at hello at thegirlsbathroom.com along with your Star of the Week entries. Absolutely. You can follow us on Instagram, TikTok and on YouTube at thegirlsbathroom. Thank you very much. If you are part of Patreon, we will see you on Monday with a bonus episode. If not, we'll see you back here next Wednesday. Bye-bye.

1:09:10Bye. Bye.

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