Dwelling On Past Mistakes Won't Benefit Your Future Growth

29:13$230 ,000. Every year you get a$10 ,000 bump. Do you guys have any debt? No, so we only have our mortgage. That one is, we have$343 ,000 left. We just recast it to lower our expenses. What's your monthly payment? $2 ,075. What kind of margin do you guys have in your budget after all the bills are paid right now? Currently, right now, after everything is paid, we have about anywhere from$35 ,000 to$4 ,000 in margin. Okay, fantastic. And I'm assuming before you made this phone call, you ran the numbers on this new pay and what that would look like. Correct. And are you guys going to be struggling?

29:56I mean, is it stressful? Or is there going to be enough margin where we're relaxed because we've prepared for this? It'll definitely be a little tight the first year. The problem is I don't know how long. So you have to apply to become an apprentice, and that can take anywhere from 8 to 12 months. Great. That gives you 8 to 12 months to stack up even more cash. Ash, what's your emergency fund right now? What's the actual amount in it? We have$36 ,000 in our emergency fund. Okay, so let's play this out. Let's say it takes eight to 10 months before we even find out. If you start doubling down and put more money in there, you could have a really fat emergency fund that would give you a ton of margin and sleep well in that first year.

30:42True or false? True. And your wife could do some things if she had to to make a little extra money? True or false? True. Would it be worth it all to make$230 ,000 and have that as your trade in the end? True or false? Very much. Yeah. Very true. I'm telling you, I'm doing it. If I'm you, I'm doing it. But we prepare for it. And it looks like you've got eight to ten months to prepare for it, and your wife can come alongside and help. I think this is an absolute no-brainer. We step forward, step backward, I'd rather, to step forward.

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33:04Start every dollar for free today by downloading it in the App Store or Google Play. Let's get right back to our call. Zach is joining us now in Los Angeles. Zach, how can we help? Hi. I'm 22 years old and I have about$25 ,000 in debt. I'm currently on baby step two. I'm trying to figure out the best way to tackle all the debt that I'm in. List it out for us. What is in your debt snowball? currently is about$600 in credit cards,$1 ,400 on a personal loan, and then the rest is a car loan that I'm handling. Okay. What do you mean by handling? I'm trying to figure out the best way to get the car off my hands because I know you guys don't believe in car payments, and I'm slowly realizing that it's strangling me.

33:56Yeah. What kind of car is it? It's a 2021 Toyota Corolla. Okay. What's it worth? I've had different evaluations. The dealer I bought it from, they offered me$16 ,000. And then a dealer probably 10 miles away from me offered me$17 ,000. Okay. So that means private sale. You probably could break even on it, no? Is it$23 ,000? Is that what you owe? I owe like$22 ,500. Okay. Even better. And private sale I've seen, I've been offered about$19 ,000 for it. Okay. How much do you earn? What's your income? It ranges. I work retail, so it can be anywhere between like$1 ,000 to$1 ,200 every two weeks. What do you mean retail?

34:44What is that specifically? What are you doing? I work for Verizon inside of a Best Buy. Okay. Do you have a degree in anything? I'm currently in school trying to get my associates in business. Okay. Okay. I got to tell you, how old are you again? 22. 22? If I'm a 22-year-old and I have this debt, I'm actually going to just work like a maniac, and I'm going to get a much better job, and then I'm going to get a better second job, and then I'm going to look for any kind of crazy projects on Craigslist, or somebody in L.A. needs me to come move them or something like this. I'm making money hand over fist because this is very doable for you.

35:22You just have the$600 in credit cards. You could knock that out by selling something you got right now. And then you got the$1 ,400 personal loan and the rest is the car. So the truth of the matter is, I don't know that you have to sell this car. You could pay this car off if you got really intense. You're just not making enough money. I don't know how you're surviving, quite frankly, in Los Angeles making$2 ,400 a month. Am I right? It's a struggle. Yeah. Are you getting ready to go to school? like are you getting ready are you trying to like save up your time to go to school or go get some sort of a certification why is it that you're um working retail right now and not getting more hours are you in college yeah i okay i'm currently taking six six classes okay i missed that part i'd press pause on those right now too oh no i have a different take on this i mean you could totally do what ken is saying if i were in your shoes i mean you make 24 000 a year driving a 23 000 car and you're in Los Angeles, you're in school, I would get out of that car almost like tomorrow.

36:25Oh, I'm all for that too. And I would get you a little clunker. I'd spend$3 ,000 and get a little beater. I'd save that up right quick as quickly as you can. And I would do that. You don't need, in my opinion, you don't need this car in your life right now. And you certainly don't need it around your neck. And once you do that, you can quickly pay off the credit cards and the personal loan. But the biggest thing of this, Ken, is I hope that you've learned your lesson that debt is not the way you want to go forward moving forward after this. Yeah, definitely. I've figured out like one of two ways to go about it.

36:59There's this like ride sharing app called Turo where basically people will pay you to rent out your car. And I think I can make the car payments doing that. No, you don't have to. Listen, you're running a business. You don't have time for that. No, you need more money. I'm actually with Jade. You need to do both. You need to get more money and you need to offload this car. You need more money because your financial problem, yes, you made a bad move on the car. You acknowledge it. We've stated that. You need more money. And right now, you spending any time in a community college for six hours of an associate's degree, I will tell you right now, and this will freak a lot of people out, and I really don't care, that is the worst thing you can do with your time right now.

37:44The amount of time you're spending on those classes, you need to be working and then get out of this debt. And then we can start to cash flow our way through community college. Those classes are going to be there for you. But there is, you've heard the old phrase, time is money, I hope. Have you ever heard that? Yes. Bro, you need to be working. And I'm with Jay. You can get out of this car, but I want you to understand what she suggested here. You literally are going to be upside down. You're still going to have to pay off that loan, whatever's left. and then you've got to figure around how to get around out of town and all that kind of stuff.

38:17So the best thing you can do right now is just buckle down and realize that you can pay this debt off by making a lot more money. And I've got to believe a guy who's willing, there's a way to make money in L.A., true or false? 100%. Well, let's go. Might I add something about schooling? So I currently work like 40 hours a week, but I'm taking all my classes online. so I'm like I started the semester on Monday and I'm already two months ahead on all my assignments because I just sat down and all right that's fine I'm not gonna die on that hill but I'm making a bigger point that right now with a guy who doesn't have a professional plan and we're just taking six hours you know I'm all for again extreme momentum to start something but you can stay in the online class that's costing you money how much yeah how much does it cost you uh I'm doing financial aid So I literally paid$40 for six classes.

39:08Okay, fine. Listen, the advice remains the same. Ken is right. You need money. Money is the magical elixir for this problem. And then, yeah, in my opinion, it would behoove you to go ahead and move this car and drive something, spend$5 ,000. $3 ,000 is to get from upside down. The other$2 ,000 is to get a beater. And then from there, that frees you up to think, okay, what am I doing? Because what are you doing with this community college degree? What's the path? I'm trying to get into like finance or hopefully if I could figure out some sort of path to go on, maybe create my own business. Okay.

39:47I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to give you as my gift, find the work you're wired to do. It's got the Get Clear assessment in it. And this is about 20 minutes. I want you to take the assessment. Will you do it? Sure. And it's going to spit out a lot of great stuff. It's got an AI component to it. It'll give you potential paths and suggestions. But you need to get more clarity on what my long term could be so that it's not about giving a snappy answer. But the way you answer that tells me you need more clarity. And the more clarity you have, the more confidence you'll have in every area of your life.

40:20But right now, and again, I'm going to give you that gift, so hang on the line. But right now, I'm telling you, it is all about cleaning up this mess. And Jade's right. You didn't need the car. Clean up the car. The rest of this stuff is easy. but what will solve your problems as a guy who's trying to figure out his direction in LA is margin and you know Jade I don't know that I love being in the big city I love being young and all that but at this stage it's like we need more young people in these large cities going I'll figure out the 15 and the 20 and the 30 year plan right now while I'm here learning and bouncing around people, I don't need a lot of social time.

41:01I need hustle time to learn how to. The social time will come. But we got a lot of young people. I'm not saying he's the guy. They get out of these big cities or whatever and they're just kind of bouncing around. And it's like, no, no, no. Get up early. Stay late. Hustle, hustle, hustle. Let's clean up our financial situation. Work around the clock. You don't have a family to come home to. No. You don't have any. That's all I'm saying. That's part of the grind. Yes. Yes. You know, not just let's go live in the big city and experience it all. Well, you got to be there for a reason. What's the point?

41:32To network, to find connections, to get in there. And you can do that while you're hustling. Yes. Simultaneously. My goodness gracious. Let's go. That's$1 ,200 every two weeks in L.A.? Woo. Oh, thanks. That's less than ramen.

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43:07welcome back to the ramsey show in the fair winds credit union studios alongside jade warshaw i'm ken coleman excited to have you with us triple eight eight two five five two two five is the phone number ilvaro is going to join us now in houston texas how can we help today Hi, guys. Thank you for taking my call. Sure. So I have a family member that owes me money, and my question is, how can I make her start paying me? We have a good relationship, and I don't want this to be something bad in between us. Who's the family member? My sister-in-law. Your sister-in-law?

43:56and she borrowed the money or your brother did?

44:08Brother? No, no, I gave her the money. It's your sister-in-law. So is it your wife's sister? Is that who it is? Right. Oh, your wife's? I'm sorry. I jumped in. I made too many conclusions. That's what threw you off. I apologize. No worries. So how much money are we talking about? $14 ,000. $14 ,000. And how did the request come in? Did it come in through your wife or did, like, how did this happen? Tell me more about how it transpired. Right. So my wife, her sister, she passed. And so a few months later, we were working on a venue for events all together, everybody, the whole family. And so she needed money for something for the venue.

45:05And I talked to her. I said, I'm going to give you the money. And, well, I gave her the money. and that has been like, what, eight years ago or so? When you say you were working on an event with your family, is this a business? Is this a family business? Yes. Okay. And so you loaned her personal money to, this is an interesting thing. So you're working on an event for a family, what was the$14 ,000 for? It was for rent. Oh. Yeah. Wait, wait, wait. Rent for a couple of months or so. Rent for the business or rent for her personal? Yes. Yes? No, for the business, for the venue. Okay, is the business still viable?

45:53No. Ah, so the business failed. Correct. And it was her business or it was you all's family business? So I was not truly involved because I had my own job, my own thing. and it was my wife with her and the other sister. Got it. Her brother. So basically everybody on her side. Understood. And this is eight years old now and you're calling us and you're asking us what advice we should give you about getting your money back from your wife's sister. That's taken eight years and I'm sure we've talked about it in the eight years time. Yes, we've talked about this. Yes, yes. I don't know that I got any advice.

46:40I got to tell you. You're between a rock and a hard place, my friend. Yeah, I don't think it's happening. Plus, it was a business that your wife was part of. So it's almost like your wife's debt if she was part of the business and the money was used to pay the business rent. Acquiring minds want to know what your wife thinks about this debt. Uh-huh. No, she passed. So she... Oh, I am so sorry. I missed that. Oh, I'm sorry. Your wife passed? Right, right. My wife, her sister, yeah, my wife passed. I am so sorry, my friend. We did not catch that detail. Did you hear that? I did not hear that. I didn't.

47:21Okay, I am so sorry. So your wife is no longer with, okay, I am so sorry. Great. Good heavens. And so that's why, in order to make the business happen, she came to me, and I say, okay, I'll help you. You're grieving too. So let's do this together. And I gave her the$14 ,000. Oh, I see. And then three years later, four years later, her husband passed. Oh, no. And so I let her go. I talked to her again. I said, okay, listen, I'm going to, let's talk about the death next year. and give you some time to grieve and to, you know, get on your feet, all that. And, yeah, so this is it right here now. So what happens, there's part of me that I'm with Ken, I think you're never going to get this back, but I just want to know when you mention it to her, what does she say?

48:26Yes, yes, I'm working on it, give me some time. are you asking for are you asking for a lump sum or are you asking for what are you asking for from her no just a payment plan i one time i sat down with her and then and i talked to her about that hey this is something that i have in my mind um give me at least a thousand dollars per year and we're not even talking about interest here so you're kind of like folks call in here all the time and they have a debt that they weren't able to pay and it goes to collections and it goes to collections because you know the the vendor basically realizes we're not going to get anything and it's not worth our time collections will get whatever they can get for it and they charge it off whatever that's you right now the likelihood of you getting this money is very very very slim So your choices are you could try to make a deal literally and say, you know, give me what you have and we'll call it clear like you would with a collections agency.

49:31You could try that. Or you could just say, you know what? This woman lost her sister. She lost her husband. She doesn't have any money. And you could just let it go. But either way, between those two, I can tell you, number three, you're not getting$14 ,000 from her. Not in lump sum. and I'm with you. I think it's a long shot. I'm sitting here going, okay, all right, I want to do my best here to serve him. I'm going, what would I do? And I think I would sit down and go, look, I know it's been tough for you. I had my own loss in this deal. I helped you out out of the goodness of my heart. But gosh, this is eating away at me.

50:06And can we make some kind of like consistent commitment to do something? So do you have anything you can sell? The problem is she probably needs the money, but I would at least go, do you have something you can sell? can we work together on this or else I'm gonna have to write this off emotionally I think it's something you can do I yeah I don't think a payment plan is that feels weird the truth is it's just as much your mistake as it is hers because borrowing money between family members is a mistake it's it is not um it's not a good move so it wasn't a good move on your part to do that and it's not a good move on her part to not pay the money she said she would pay back so it's just a rock and a hard place.

50:47I'm sorry. Are you in financial trouble?

50:52It can help. Not too bad, no. Okay, well, let me say this because we're winding up our time here, but the reason I ask that question is that's also the switch that needs to happen. You need to now take this$14 ,000 and go, this is not going to solve my problem. That's going to be gravy if and when I get any of it. So now we change our life. Laura, you've got to take control of your situation and make it better. You can't rely on this 14 coming in to make the day better at all. In fact, I would just, oof. This is a tough situation. It's a lot of money. It's a lot of money, but you've got to move on from it because it may be very hard to get back.

51:34So sorry you're in this situation. The moral of the story is what? In a bumper sticker. Don't loan people money.

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53:27all right let's go to marley in phoenix arizona marley how can we help hey guys Hi. So I am a woman in my 40s, and I already had some assets and investments in place before starting to prioritize being debt-free. Like, over the years, I've built, like, a comfortable, stable life. I don't make a ton of money, but I make good financial decisions overall. I'm really proud of where I am, but I keep hitting the same issue where I get into a relationship, and for me, marriage is not on the table. I don't want to be married, but I also don't want to be alone. Tell me, wait a second. All right, we need at least a few seconds on this deal.

54:15You want a relationship, but you don't want to get married. What's the barrier there? I watched my mom and my dad and my they are wonderful people my dad was a good provider but it made me unable to trust anyone else with my financial well-being like I always need to take care of that for me I need to have autonomy for that did someone do I just do you wrong in my life being able to put my financial well-being in someone else's care is that because of how your dad treated your mom? Oh, no. He didn't give her a lot of equality and equity. He was a good provider. They had a decent relationship for what they were taught in their...

55:00Okay. But you came out of that and said, but because of that, you use that as the context to say, as a result, I don't ever want to rely on a husband for financial safety. correct correct i'm i am going to be independent and take care of myself and then you know build that life but but you want a relationship monogamous long-term so what you're what you're looking for is companionship that's what you're looking for right and you have a companion about that well how's that working out i mean it always works out well for a while. How long? And eventually they want to wife me. Like, I don't know.

55:48Well, that's all you're going to get. I mean, you have to, here's the thing. I'm just going to shoot you straight as your friend. If you say to somebody, I want companionship from you, there's no commitment there. And so that person has the ability to say, yeah, I'll hang with you as long as this works out for me. And then when it no longer works out for me, they can, they can cut you loose that's what you're giving them permission to do so you kind of have to know that if that's what you want to do you probably every five six years or maybe you might get a decade out of somebody well that's what i want to know switching over to somebody else and and i'm okay with that oh you are how do you if if i am clear about what's on the table and they don't believe me which i tend to find is the case they think oh i'll change your mind sure sure sure like I don't have children.

56:36Everybody always said, oh, she'll change her mind. Guess what? So you're sad you're breaking up with these guys and they're sad. You feel like you're a heartbreaker. And you're like, why am I a heartbreaker? I told you this from the beginning. I just feel like I was clear about my expectations. And eventually they either, the only time that I feel I need to end the relationship, like if it is financially oriented, is when they say either you give me access to your accounts or I can't be with you and I say, okay, then we're not together. How many times has this happened where you have broken off a relationship because the guy wanted to get married?

57:15Two. And how old are you, if I may ask? I'm in my 40s. You're in your 40s. And has it been really heartbreaking, any of these? Have they been gut-wrenchingly hard, even though you stuck to your principle? I'll give you that. Has it been really hard on you? I mean, there's obviously obviously emotional strife, but when I look back on it, it's not a level of regret that I feel like, oh, I missed out on something good because of it. All right, great. So what's your question? Yeah, what's the question? Because my thing is like, I'll meet you where you're at. If you're like, I never want to get married, fine.

57:49At this point, I think it's just setting proper expectations in no way. I have a suggestion later that I want you to consider, Marley, but I don't want to get in the way of what you called for. What did you call for? well what is the appropriate structure because i know for the whole ramsay thing is that when you're married you're one yeah if you're not married in there if you're not married don't combine it exactly and so what is an appropriate way to execute that you're not on the table you're not confused you're dating you have to view everybody as somebody you're dating which is my money is mine I do whatever my plan is I do my own thing and I'm with them as long as they'll be with me until they want to get married and I don't and then they'll exit the scene and I will are you talking about like day-to-day expenses yeah like what's because I've tried several your roommates it sounds to me like you're can I say this your roommates and you got some type of privileges that's between you and whoever, but your roommates.

58:55So that means you're splitting utilities. You're splitting the rent. I mean, that's what we would suggest because you're not married. And by the way, that's what you want anyway. It sounds like you don't want anybody to weigh in on your finances or contribute or contribute. Maybe back out perhaps it's more of a backing out of the romantic part of the relationship and just saying like knowing that the romantic part does have some like you want to be fair you want to be equitable like you don't want to be having anybody feel like they're being taken advantage of well here um i'm so confused here's the thing the hard part is the hard part is foundationally i see it differently because if you have love for someone at a certain level, especially at an intimate level, then you're wanting that intimacy to take place in other areas of the relationship as well, but you have blocks there.

59:49So there is, I'm just saying this again as your buddy, there is going to be, because of the way love works, there is going to be some dysfunction there with you having those barricades there and wanting basically to have everything a marriage has, but not having the marriage. It's like, I want all the benefits of this, but I don't want any of the risk of it. And that, I think that's what you're struggling with. And I'm going to tell you, that's going to cause you issues and it's going to cause confusion. And like you said, to quote you, emotional strife, because you're trying to execute, you're trying to take, have your cake and eat it too.

1:00:26And it seems like you have a really good reason in your head for that. But I think that you're letting that reason become an excuse for you to really get the most out of this. I said it before that I wasn't going to try to convince you elsewise and I'm not, but I would suggest you maybe getting to the bottom of that because to your point, you've seen relationships not work out well, but I guarantee you, you've seen them, you have seen them work out well. So you know, it can go either way and you have to ask yourself, what was the factor in that? What caused a relationship to go well or not go well?

1:00:59And is there any piece of control that you can have over that? I think, yes. I think that marriages are successful every single day. And so there's part of that, that there could be more education or learning to go on that, that could help you. You got to redefine control. Marlee, I thought I was going to hear something far more traumatic. Maybe you didn't want to share it, don't need you to share it. Something you witnessed has created a massive, massive hole of trust in your life. You just don't trust anybody. Not criticizing you here. You called in. I'm making a little quick analysis here to say that there is no way to structure these relationships with romance and then a lack of trust around finance.

1:01:46You just can't do it. And what's going to happen, Marley? And you said you're okay with it and you've signed up for it. Here was my suggestion. If you haven't done it before, I would get a really good therapist and I would sit with a therapist long enough and you got the money to do it. And I would dive into this to see if the therapist can help you get to the bottom of this lack of trust and then help you with tools to be able to deal with this trust. Because I think in the end, if you give it a shot, for those of us, I've been married almost 28 years, so I'm not selling something that I don't believe in.

1:02:17I just think that you can have that relationship that you long for and coexist with finances, but not until you can see the source of your lack of trust. And I see that. I feel that. I hate that for you. But I would give it a shot. I'd kick the tire since you've been in so many relationships and they haven't worked out. Some to your detriment romantically and emotionally. Give it a shot. Like get to the source of this before we jump back into another relationship. And I think it's worth it in the long run.

1:02:55Thank you.

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1:04:37all right jade i know you're paying attention to this stuff we talk about this stuff from time to time uh affordability probably the issue in america today right whether you're on tiktok Instagram, CNN, Fox News, whichever side of the ideological aisle or political aisle, everybody's talking about affordability. And so I'm holding in my hands here a Yahoo article. Trump is weighing in on all this stuff as well as the president. And latest headline, President Trump instructs government to buy$200 billion in mortgage bonds in a bid to make homes more affordable. And so here's the idea. If the government purchases$200 billion in mortgage bonds, Trump is vowing that this will drive rates down and make the cost of owning a home more affordable.

1:05:27That's his quote. And he's saying it's one of the many steps in restoring affordability, something that the Biden administration refused to do, whatever, whatever, whatever. I bring that up to say, you know, Dave and I were on the air, I believe, last week we were talking about one move that we did like is Trump somehow pushing or help influencing legislation, or if through an executive order it can be done, not allowing corporations to come in and buy houses. Yeah, I think that would be wonderful. We love that. This one, whether I agree with it or not, is a very interesting thing and explain at least the math behind it, whether or not it's true, whether or not he can do it.

1:06:09it is interesting that people understand because what we want to do as Ramsey Solutions, we want to come when we can alongside potential public policy or existing public policy or new public policy and go, here's how this affects you. So if in fact what he's saying, if the federal government's 200 billion, boom, explain why he thinks that that will work, what the math is on that. Yeah. So obviously this is not the first time something like this has happened. We saw it COVID to an extent. But basically, think about it. When you buy a mortgage bond, mortgage bonds are simply a bunch of mortgages rolled into one investment vehicle.

1:06:47So if I buy a house, can you buy a house? Technically, the lender doesn't own it and investors have bought that off. And the reason that that happens is because when investors buy these mortgage bonds, then it frees up the lenders to have more money to lend out again. So it creates a cycle there. So when these bonds are bought up, obviously, if you infuse that market with$200 billion and you're buying up$200 billion of bonds, you're creating a very, very high demand for bonds. Obviously, the higher the demand, the higher the price bracket goes for those. And as the price goes down, then because this is an in-demand item, people are willing to receive less in order to get it.

1:07:27When I say receive less, I'm talking about interest. So when those interest rates go down, housing interest rates go down. So that's how it's connected. So the thought is, hey, if we can go in here and kind of, whether you believe this is artificial or not, artificially buy up all of these bonds, that's going to create the ability for the interest rates to go down. So that's kind of the idea around it, whether you agree with it or not, whether you do it quickly or slowly. That's part of this is, hey, if we do this too quickly, could it really mess with rates and could we see things plummet too quickly and it cause a whole set of other problems?

1:08:01It looks like whether they continue it or not, I think they've already started, Ken, and they've done like two or three billion of the 200 billion. And so maybe if they do this kind of slower and over time, we might see interest rates tick down. So whether you agree with it or not, that's up to you. But just understanding it, I think, is the first part of it. I think a lot of times headlines like this can they see the president's name and they see a big number and they go, oh, that's good. Or I hate it. Or I hate it. And but really understanding it is a great place to start. And let me just add briefly to this.

1:08:35Understand that even if this were to work the way that the president wants it to work and we see interest rates come down, when interest rates come down, you watch interest rates on homes, mortgages drop. Let's just call it significantly, Jade. What happens next? People who've been on the sidelines get in. Demand goes up. What happens when demand goes up, Jade? When demand goes up, those prices. Prices go up. So while the cost of borrowing might go down, the cost of a house goes up. So I say all of that not to say you're doomed, no, but to say that what we say here at Ramsey is there's never, you know, it's always a good time to buy if you can afford.

1:09:15Right. That's the best time to buy when you can afford it. There's no waiting for the circumstances to be right because we're sitting in a situation now where everybody's griping about housing. Well, I got news for you. How's this going up if rates go down? Because of the demand. We just explained that. So here's the point. Even with the 15-year, we saw it dip last week. All these trends, again, just pay attention to this. Only buy if you're financially ready. And that means to make sure that your mortgage payment is no more than 25 % of your take-home pay on a 15-year fixed-rate conventional loan.

1:09:47And you need to know that buying a house in your budget is possible if you have the right real estate. Ramsey, trusted real estate agent. So find yours at RamseySolutions.com slash agents. RamseySolutions.com slash agents. Don't get stuck just trying to ride the roller coaster of trends. It never works that simply. Linwood is up next in Montgomery, Alabama. Linwood, how can we help? Hi, Ken. Hi, Jade. Thank you so much for taking my call. Well, that Yahoo article is a perfect segue into my question. So super simple. I'm active duty. About to buy a house in March. My wife and I, this is our first home.

1:10:30Just kind of on the fence if I should use a conventional loan or a VA loan. Yeah, that article came out, and I called my loan officer. And basically the difference I'm looking at is conventional, what I'm quoted as about$1 ,204 per month. And with the VA loan at the APY and APR, it would be about$1 ,160 per month. So$44 per month difference, about$528 per year. And I'll tell you why I'm on the fence. Once again, first time owning a home. I'm not too fond of the escrow. I'm new to all this real estate stuff. And when I actually understood what escrow was, I was a little bit confused on I'm going to give the bank more of my money to pay my bills for me when I feel I'm competent enough to pay my bills myself.

1:11:29I already do it with my car insurance, my phone, my gym membership, whatever. I can pay all my own bills. So with the VA loan, I won't be able to bypass escrow. my loan officer is telling me I can bypass the escrow with the conventional loan so I'm uh I'm wanting the conventional for the liberty of not having escrow but I'm on the fence because I have a better rate with the VA but I will have the escrow that is a lot okay and I'm thinking through it um I'll be honest I'm not a specialist on either of these I feel like you would have to have the number, I would have to be able to compare it to something else.

1:12:14Yeah. And for me, I'm thinking about the fact that usually we don't recommend VA loans because of the fees that are associated. I don't know if the numbers that you've gotten have accounted for that or not. I know that if you're exempt because of disability, those fees go away. I don't know if that's the case for you. So there's some things in here that I honestly don't have the information to tell you fully. What's the difference in rates? The difference in rates, I don't have the best credit because I've been too davish my whole life. I don't ever borrow money. Okay. So the difference in rates, the conventional is 6 % and the VA is 565.

1:12:57And I guess to make my question more simple. I'm sorry that was so complicated, Jake. It's okay. I just, I cannot get behind escrow. Am I too weird? Am I too... I think it's the wrong thing to be hung up on. I think so too. Are you currently active? You're currently active duty, correct? Yes, sir. Okay. And are you moving around from base to base? Like what do you anticipate the next five, six years looking like as far as you moving around? I will probably move from where I'm at right now in December of 2027. And then this house will be a rental. No. And I'll probably move overseas after this.

1:13:37Don't do it. We get this call all the time from military men and women. First of all, thank you for your service. You're a great American. But let me tell you what we tell them. If you're in the military and you're moving every two years, the house becomes a massive headache at times. And so flipping that all the time with you going overseas, your current situation, I would not get into the landlord business, certainly when I'm overseas. So I I would sit tight, see what the overseas trip looks like and what that's going to determine before I buy a home. I just wouldn't jump in right now and buy a home.

1:14:04Yeah, the escrow is not part of the discussion, by the way. Yeah, it doesn't even matter. Just don't buy a home right now with you moving around so much.

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1:15:49All right, let's go to Megan in... I think this is... Oh, this one always gets me. Hold on. This is really fun. I'm going to say it is Lima. Is it Lima? Ohio? Is it Lima or Lima? What is it? Is it Lima? Oh my gosh. Okay, great. I was going with the Peru. Peruvian reference. By the way, sorry to the team in the control room. They were like, is Ken's meds wearing off? Is he melting down right now? I was trying, Megan, so hard. No, no, it's okay. We like to laugh here. Lima. Okay, great. I like to be phonetically strong. Well, in Peru, it's Lima, but I guess it's Espanol. In Ohio, it's Lima. Yeah.

1:16:27All right, Megan. We have a rushi in Ohio, but it's spelled like Russia. And they call it rushi? yeah well how about this when i lived in kansas there is a city that was spelled like arkansas city and it was called arkansas oh that's so irritating it was called arkansas city let me give you one here in tennessee and i think they do this in georgia as well it's lafayette oh the legendary french general uh-huh who france loaned to america and as a result he was a hero and there are Lafayette's towns and counties all over America, except for in Tennessee and Georgia, they call it Lafayette. It's hurtful.

1:17:12Somebody punched me right in the neck. Well, nothing hurts more than Murfreesboro. Murfree? Not Murphy? Sorry. Megan, we're getting all... We're going off the rails. Megan, so sorry. It's like group therapy with you. This is very exciting. How can we help you today? My parents are in their late 60s, and they have done nothing to prepare for retirement. They say they're just going to work until they die because they just see no point in ever slowing down to the point that they don't have any documentation. Like, their will is from before I was born, and I'm in my late 30s. So how do I guide them?

1:17:51Because I've tried signing them up for classes, tried getting them set up with a lawyer to try to get documents in place, and every time it just falls apart. Are they asking for your help or are you volunteering it? Volunteering it because I don't want to be set up to have to deal with all of it when they die. Oh, man. Oh, man. Megan, I get it. First off, I feel your pain. The hard part about this is, and Ken knows, when someone's not asking and you're, you know, you're breaking your neck trying to do it for them and help them, they don't want it. They don't care. It is not important to them. And it is important to you.

1:18:28It should be. But the hard part of this is they don't care. Now, I don't know if you've had this conversation with them, which is, hey, guys, I know you haven't asked for my help. And I'm sorry if it feels like I am kind of encroaching on your privacy here. But here's what I'm thinking about. I'm thinking about the fact that I'm 30 years old. I have X amount of dollars and X amount of obligations. it's none of my business but I have the information right now and you can tell me if I'm wrong that you're really not too concerned with retirement you have the right not to be but I am and the reason why I am is because if I look up and you're 80 years old and somebody needs care or somebody needs this I'm realizing that all that's going to fall on me and that's what I'm concerned about is there a plan that I don't know about that you guys can tell me about that's the conversation I'd be having instead of jumping straight to let me help you with budgeting I've had some of that conversation with them and it's always kind of the same of like well we'll get to it later we have to grow our business we have to focus on this you know like they'll come up with a thousand different kind of excuses on why they're never gonna work on that and then you can say and then you can say okay well I'm just that's fine but I do want to let you guys know so that you know if there's no money there if we look up and you're 80 and there's no money there i can't help i can't and then you can let them know that and say so if you're on medicaid opposite they have a ton of money they're worth a lot okay and they don't want to my mom will make like a comment of like well when i die you're not going to get any of my half of those state it's all going to be a scholarship because i want everyone to remember me for forever my dad will be like no and then that'll be the end of the conversation like it'll be like that's as much as you're going to get does that make sense so you're more concerned with your cut of the will than like them having money it's more concerned of like not doing what they wanted if they had certain things they wanted like if my mom wants a scholarship in her honor how am I supposed to know what scholarship then that's not up to you then she'll leave instructions and if she doesn't leave instructions to Jay's point I gotta tell you this changed everything for me here in this conversation your mom is a treat to make a statement like that and then your dad your dad just kind of does the whole okay and that says a lot to me that I'm not sure the scholarship has been outlined I think your dad just is blowing her off in a very you know sort of, oh, let's change the subject kind of way.

1:21:14You don't need to worry about this. I got to tell you. And by the way, the more you keep bringing it up, it could be to your disadvantage, if you know what I'm saying. You're like the little fruit fly. And by the way, this whole call is a little close to home for me because, Megan, we had fun at the start of this call. I'll let you in on this. This is probably almost two years worth of frustration for me. I've been trying to talk Jade into doing a duet with me on a live event stage. And it's the same thing. She doesn't want to hear that. Every time I bring it up. So it's like what I'm doing to Jade and trying to sing with her.

1:21:52It's because you want to be Cher and I'm trying to tell you I should be Cher. See, it's not going anywhere. And see, I keep telling her I want to do a duet. It'll be great. It'll be great. I tell her why I talk about my soft baritone nothing she's not interested in singing with me on a stage so like your mom and dad it's the same thing they just aren't interested in your input so you got to learn i got to walk away it's just not going to happen and i've had to deal with it i'm currently processing it but it was a little too soon but i thought it was a good metaphor i'm ready whenever you are ken should i explain to all people who don't get sarcasm that i'm being completely and utterly sarcastic.

1:22:31They know. Okay, good. I would never try to sing next to you. Ever. Like, even in the car. Really? With the radio up. We should do an episode of on front row seat. Right. And like. Some type of carpool karaoke. Yeah. No, I just would have to, I would have to practice forever. You're just too darn good. Too darn good. Okay, let's talk for a second because I think this is bigger issue I want to get to family whether it is and I'm gonna I'm not gonna go specific I'm gonna tee you up here uh it could be loaning money we say don't loan money right it could be this kind of pressure here the will and blah blah blah you know there just has got to be some kind of basic read the room when you're dealing with family and money yes or no um because you just don't have the influence you want especially up the ladder to parents Your parents are aging.

1:23:24They become the children. You become the parent. At some point, though, there's got to be some boundary that you put in place for your mental and emotional health. True or false? True. Boundaries are life. I'm saying this because I have my own personal journeys happening. Right. And let me just say, when folks call in with these questions, I feel like I'm in a whole other headspace on it now because it hits. And the thing is, yes, you need boundaries. And it's not like boundaries there to keep people out. It's just for everybody to be operating in their most healthy space. And that's the thing that you have to tell yourself.

1:24:04And that I tell myself is not to be mean or to keep somebody at bay. It's keep everybody in their most healthy space. I'm talking to myself right now. Right. Because, okay, and without getting into your personal stuff, it's like there are times where it's like I have to put a boundary on me because if I say something and it gets completely ignored, that puts me in a bad place, right? When your intentions are good. Yeah. That's a boundary. You go, I want to protect myself by not saying anything. Yes. You know, that's half the battle. And then too, you also have to ask yourself, why am I even getting it?

1:24:35There's some times where it's like, you're getting involved. Why are you even getting involved? Did anybody ask you? Which is what I said to Megan, obviously panned out differently, but if nobody asked you, don't get involved. And here's another thing. So this is a fun example. And Megan, bless her heart, great heart. She brings it up to mom and mom hits her back with, you're not getting any of my money. Well, that's not fun to hear. It's not, but it's also mom's prerogative. I know, but it's not brought up. If you don't bring it up, it doesn't get thrown in your face. That's true. To your point.

1:25:04Mind your business is what you're saying. Listen, unless they asked you, Megan, we'd like to know what you think. You stay up. Mind your business.

1:25:44Welcome back to the Ramsey Show in the Fairwinds Credit Union studio. Alongside Jade Warshaw and Ken Coleman, 888-825-5225 is the phone number. Riley joins us now in Seattle, Washington. Riley, how can we help? Hey there. It's time for me to save for a down payment. And I use a Ramsey Trusted Pro who wants me to stop contributing to retirement to get intense about storing cash. This gives me some FOMO about missing compounding and just turning retirement off. Do you have any thoughts? I mean, if you're truly on baby step 3B, it's your choice. If you want to do both simultaneously or if you want to take all of that money and really hammer the down payment hard for the next two to two and a half years, what's the horizon?

1:26:35How long is it going to take to save your down payment if you had all the money going towards it? yeah so i could probably do it within a year if i got really intense and that's his idea is stop doing things at the same time how long would it take probably take two years and what's what do you like are you in a hurry that i must have a house in one year or are you fine to take the two-year route?

1:27:05Well, what's tough is it's so expensive in Seattle that waiting seems like prices will just continue to go up. So I would like to get intense. I just kind of need some encouragement to have a year where I don't contribute any. Okay. So you want to do the year plan. Yeah. I would just say that at the end of the day, you have to remember these are both investments. So mentally we think, oh my gosh, I'm not investing. I'm giving up investing to get this house. And what's helped me and what did help me when I was in your shoes is to remember real estate is also an investment and it's a forced savings account for your future, right?

1:27:45So once you buy this house, you're saving up this down payment. All that is doing is creating equity for when you buy the house. And so don't think of it as I'm not investing. Think of it as I'm kind of diversifying in this way. I've got money going that's going to go to my 401k for retirement. And then I'm also investing money into this primary real estate venture. Does that help? Yeah, absolutely. Like I'm just, instead of investing in one area, I'm doing it in a new area that I'm just not used to. That's right. The other thing is I play around with some numbers and just do real math. Look at trends in the Seattle market over the last 30 years.

1:28:29What is the percentage? There are people that the market has gone up on average over a decade. What are the experts saying? Right now, I know that I can go online and I can get a good guess on what home prices look to be. Will they go up in 2026? in my county. And so we're talking about 12 months difference. In other words, if you go all in, pause investing for 12 months, there's an amount of money that you anticipate being able to save, correct? Yes. Yes. And then if we say, all right, if I didn't pause investing and I saved over a 24-month period, what would that amount of money be? And I think you know what that number is, correct?

1:29:16Yeah. Okay. So then look at what do I think housing, based on the market and whatever I can look at, how much do I think housing prices are going to be that much different in the difference of 12 months? I'm just saying I would look at all of this and not be like, oh my gosh, you know, it's going up, it's going up. And in all reality, it's not going to go up as much as you think in two years. So now you're looking at the difference of one year. So as you're making this decision, I'm just giving you some food for thought. Does make sense? I'm not telling you what to do, but I'm just telling you to have all the information, get all the numbers out, and let's be educated about what we're doing here, because you may not have to pause investing.

1:29:58Yeah, and unfortunately for the area, it's like $200 ,000 for a down payment is my goal, and that just seems like an insane amount of money. but if I waited then maybe it will be okay now you need$240 ,000 and these are not incredible homes it's just the market here right and then if you think about that$40 ,000 across those two years you have to ask yourself okay is that worth saving$40 ,000 is it worth what I would have made investing that extra I don't know how much you're saving monthly for this but that's really the equation that you're looking at the amount that you would be putting towards your down payment monthly instead of investing it, would that money invested outpace what you project to be the increase in the real estate market?

1:30:51Now, saying that - And that's the tough piece because we don't know. We don't know. You could probably find some realistic projections out there. You could probably find some realistic projections out there. I personally, I, Jade, probably would not nerd out to that extent because there's two things on the line. It's a question of values. You have to go, okay, how much do I value having this house? What's it going to give me? Is it going to give me stability? It's going to give me a little bit of diversification in my investments because this is probably not your forever home. At some point, you'll probably sell it and you'll make some money and that sort of thing.

1:31:26I'm giving you that equation because you might like to nerd out on it. I personally would not. I would just look at this and go, you know what? How quickly do I want to get this done and out of my life? I value doing it faster than I value putting aside the extra money in retirement, so I'm just going to do it. Or I just really love the way it feels to invest this full amount, so I'm fine with it, right? It's totally up to you. There's not a wrong or right answer on this. Yeah. Is this your first home? Yes, it will be. And how old are you again? 36. 36. Is it just you? Are you single? Yep. Okay.

1:32:04Any plans to settle down?

1:32:10I mean, I like my area. I could easily, and the biggest thing is the commute. I mean, I could afford much more, but driving an hour each way would not be very fun. By the way, I agree with you on that. That's a quality of life issue. That adds up really quick. My point is, I'm not trying to get into your relationship life, but I am saying if you plan to settle down at some point, that person may have and should have some say in where you're going to live. And at 36 and single, not ready to settle down, doesn't sound like to me, which is fine. I'm just giving you, if I'm sitting in your shoes, I'm probably going to take, I'm going to save up more and I'm going to take my time.

1:32:54I'm not going to try to rush in the next 12 months. I wouldn't, knowing what I know about you. Maybe hit my goal, but then not purchase right away. No, I'm just saying, what you gave us was, should I pause my retirement investing and go all in and take that money and put it into Baby Step 3B? I thought that was the question. Correct. And I'm saying, in your situation, I would not pause investing. I would just keep investing and keep saving. Yeah, because he's not in a situation where I feel like he needs to rush to settle down in a place to live. He's single. I'm okay with renting in his situation.

1:33:34You know what? I'm just the opposite. I'm like, if there's not a lovely lady in the picture, it'd be one thing if you're like, I'm dating someone, we're getting serious. I'd be like, ah, wait, you guys can do this together. But if there's no one in the picture, I'd be like, let me get this house before this real estate market goes up. And you're talking to a guy who's older and understands the power of that investing. and I'm just like, I wouldn't rush to buy if I were you. Certainly not in Seattle. Two different opinions. So you get to do what you want. That's right. It's your call, Riley. And you're a smart guy.

1:34:02You're doing the right thing. Love the question. Do what feels best for you on this. You're not going to screw it up. That's right. Yeah.

1:34:47We'll see you next time.

1:34:52copy editing, and creative roles. Check out all our job postings at RamseySolutions.com slash careers. That's RamseySolutions.com slash careers.

1:35:17All right, folks, if you fly blind with your taxes, Oh, they're going to be confusing, stressful. I already have a little like kind of faux indigestion, just thinking about flying blind on taxes. Something I would never do. Ever, ever, ever. But with the help of Ramsey's easy to digest tax resources, you can handle your taxes with ease and confidence. Go to RamseySolutions.com slash taxes. RamseySolutions.com slash taxes. and they'll help you navigate all the different changes in life, confusing forms, and all the complicated filing scenarios. You also find tips and tricks to make your tax return easy and guides on filing if you're self-employed or a freelancer.

1:35:58So there it is, folks, ramsaysolutions.com slash taxes, a tremendous resource and a really scary, scary, and sometimes very, very frustrating area of our lives. So there you go. Let's go to Grace now in Green Bay, Wisconsin. Grace, how can we help today? Hi, I was wondering if you guys have any advice on how a young person can get a good-paying job without a college degree. I have lots and lots to say about it. Let's talk about your specific situation. Tell me how old you are. I'm 20. 20. Are you in school, out of school, not going to do school? What's your story? I would want to go to college, but I don't want to go in debt in order to go to college.

1:36:49So I'm currently just like working for like entry level jobs. Okay. What are you making? I was making$17 an hour. Like that was the most I ever made. You were. That says in the past. What are we making right now? Well, I'm currently trying to get into the military. but in case I don't because I know a lot of people get medically rejected in case I don't you want to fall back yeah all right just for fun okay like not holding you to these answers you don't have to sound right you don't have to impress us we're already a big fan of you grace let's assume you had the degree and say that the money was there and you could get a degree and that degree was going to get you into a career path do you have any ideas desires for what that answer would be?

1:37:40What is that career path or paths, plural? I would like to be in government and be able to travel. Government and travel. Tell me more about this government job. Just give me the ideal job. Ken, this is what my days would look like. What would you be doing? My days or like the exact job title? No, no. What would you be doing during the day? Forget job title. I don't care about job title. What would you be doing in the government? um uh well i really like the the current um the current people in government right now and i would want to like the dream job would be like to be able to have that like some power to be able to change like bad laws and just like change laws okay got it so you're talking about uh you're talking about a legislative job and that's way up the ladder you gave me the answer okay so the military situation uh when are we going to find out about that what's our timeline um well i'm going to boot camp tomorrow so you're in find out within a week or two oh so you're already in yes but i'm asking like for other people like because a lot of people get medically rejected from the military and there's still a chance that i could so that's why i was really curious, like how you guys advise people, like if they have, like, like if they want to get like a good paying, like a influential job, like how they can go about that without going into debt.

1:39:13I'm not going to answer it on influential because that's very subjective. But if for some reason you get medically rejected, you don't cut it in boot camp. What we're going to do is if we don't have any money to get qualified in college, then we look at, can I get qualified to do a variety of different things? The answer to that is yes. So we really want to start with, what was it that I would like to do? And the answer to what is it that you would like to do should always come back to, what are you good at doing? Right? So what are the skills and talents you have? Now, here's the deal. I'm going to gift you this so you don't have to go through this long answer.

1:39:48I'm going to give you my book, Find the Work You're Wired to Do. It has a 20-minute Get Clear career assessment in it, And it's actually going to involve AI, and it's going to spit out some very specific things based on three criteria that the assessment measures. What Grace is good at, that's your talent and skills. What Grace really loves to do, we call that passion. That's work you really look forward to. It's a task or a function or a role. And then we're going to look at what motivates Grace. What's her missional result in life? What gets her up in the morning to put out into the world? That's a result from work.

1:40:24So the assessment will do that for you. But the answer to your fallback is I'm going to look at my assessment. I'm going to look at what I'm good at doing. And now I know what types of jobs that I can go get or I can learn. And I could go through a training program. I could go to some type of a boot camp if it's technology related. If it's a trade, I can go to trade school. You still tracking with me? Yeah. There you go. So we figure out what is the work I can do because I've got some raw talent. And then what's the work I want to do because I know that I love getting up every day and maybe I like doing process work.

1:41:02Maybe I like doing people work. Maybe I like working with objects. Maybe I like ideating and creating from my head. Those are the four types of work. Idea work, people work, process work, and object work. And so, again, this assessment will help you. But as you begin to figure out what kind of work I would like to do and do I have the requisite talent with training, now we've got some answers. And now we look at, okay, what is it going to take for me to get into that? And most of the time you're going to find you don't need a college degree, that you can work your way into that. So let's see how the military thing plays out.

1:41:34And here's the good news for you. You make it through boot camp. You stick it out. You're going to now have the GI Bill. You're familiar with that, yes? Yes. And now Grace can do what else? Yeah. Now Grace can do whatever she wants after she pays, you know, serves her time, rather. So really excited for you. Do you have some medical condition? You don't need to share with us, but is there something going on with you where you think it's a good chance you may not make it through boot camp? No. But, I mean, I just wanted to have a backup plan. I want to bring Jade in because she's got a lot of wisdom here.

1:42:09I want you to weigh in on the mindset and anything tactical that you think she might do as she walks into this very intense season that I think she's going to make it through. But what if she doesn't? You're talking about the boot camp specifically? Yeah. What do you want to add to this? What would she do? Oh, boy. What's her fault? What would you add to what I say? Anything you want to add? I mean, you covered the career front, like, cover to cover. I don't have anything to add there. Are we talking about going into the boot camp? Like, what to experience? No, I'm saying if she doesn't make it.

1:42:36Yes. Which we don't want to focus on that. But since she asked, what would you say to her if she doesn't make it for some reason? Forget the career front. What would you say to her mindset-wise, emotional? I would say, oh, okay. I would say, you know, sometimes when things don't go the way we want them to go, we're thinking it's something, like we automatically think it's a negative. Like if I don't get the job, it was a loss. If I switch jobs, it's a demotion. And I would say to flip that around. And if something doesn't happen, it's because it wasn't supposed to happen, which means there's the other successful piece that's out there waiting for you to just find it.

1:43:08And it's likely better than what you were initially planning for. That's why the other thing didn't work out. Yeah. What branch, do you mind if I ask what branch you're going into? Sure, the Navy. Come on. My grandfathers were both in the Navy. I'm partial. There we go. I think that's fantastic. Congratulations. Can we just say congratulations on you being selected? You're going into one of the great organizations in the world. United States Navy. You're going to learn so much, and you're going to come out of this thing a lot tougher, sounds like, after boot camp. I don't know what boot camp's like in the Navy.

1:43:43Is boot camp in the Navy as hard as it is in the Marines? I don't know. No. It's not? No, not at all, I don't think, at least. Good for you. I think you're going to crush it. Hey, we're rooting for you here. Yeah. We're rooting for you. Thank you. Yeah, so hang on the line. My gift to you, your boot camp gift, is find the work you're wired to do. And also, Christian, let's get her my other bestselling book, From Paycheck to Purpose, which is the seven stages of doing work that you were absolutely created to do. Very proud of those stages. That'll be helpful after you read the first book and take the assessment.

1:44:18And thank you for serving our country. You're a great American. I don't know if I could do well in the Navy, Jade. You know why? The deep sea? I'm afraid I'd be like ralphing over the edge of the boat all the time would I? yeah

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1:46:19All right. The Ramsey Show question of the day is brought to you by Why Refi. If defaulted private student loans have taken over your life, Y-R-E-F-Y can help you breathe again with a low fixed rate plan that fits your budget. Visit Y-R-E-F-Y dot com slash Ramsey. That's the letter Y-R-E-F-Y dot com slash Ramsey. It's not available in all states. All righty then. Today's question comes from Aaron in Kansas. He says, would there ever be a time where you wouldn't pay tithes in order to get yourself out of a bad financial situation? I'm doing okay, except I was dumb and bought a condo I couldn't afford.

1:46:54Now I'm in a situation where it's hard to pay my tithe. And I'm just curious as to your thoughts on how to juggle generosity and getting out of debt. I love this question. There's a couple facets to it. I'll try to hit all of them. First off, for anybody listening, tithe, if you're a Christ follower, one of the practices is you give 10 % of what you earn back to your church in order for that to be used for, you know, missions. or building the church or what have you. That's a practice that many Christ followers do. So that being said, here at Ramsey, we would say giving that type of generosity, any type of generosity, including things like tithe, should be at the top of your list, the top of your budget as a practice all the time.

1:47:43That's my personal stance on it as well. That being said, from a debt payoff perspective, I always like to remind people that it's your choice. I personally would always give. It's just a personal conviction that I have. And if you do want to get into the spiritual part of it, that's between you and God. I don't think that he's going to strike you with lightning if you don't give. And I also believe that your heart should be in the right place to give, to be a cheerful giver, giving out of willingness. And it sounds like at this point, you're not sure if you're willing to give this money. and that's something that you can kind of wrestle through on your own.

1:48:24I'm not going to sit here and tell you yes or no. I can tell you what I would do, which I would continue to give. And I did when Sam and I were going through our debt payoff, 460 ,000. Money was so tight and every cent counted. But for me, my personal perspective was you can't out give God. And when you do give, you receive back. That's what scripture tells us is that when you give and it shall be given, pressed down, shaken together, running over, it will flow back to you. And so I believe that. And I believe that not just in a monetary sense, but you can receive that back with peace. You can receive that back with favor, open doors, all of these different things.

1:49:02And so for me personally, it was something that I felt like if I didn't do, I was only cheating myself is kind of the way I viewed it and Sam viewed it. So that's up to you to kind of decipher. That's just my take. Like, I really want to look at this condo that you can't afford because what I'm really just seeing here is less of a tithe issue and more of a sustainability issue because what's the solution for this condo that's outside of your budgetary range? That's my question. So I'd really be trying to get that right-sized and right-side up. And that's the bigger play here, I think, than if you miss a month of tithe.

1:49:43And here's the reality. my guess is, not having his budget in front of us, that if the tithe payment makes enough room to him to pay, he's got bigger problems. It's not just the tithe issue. We're running way too tight, and I think you're right. Very astute on that. Thank you for the question. Let's now go. This is kind of fun. We've got Jade in studio with me, but we're going here in our neighborhood, right, in Nashville, Tennessee, where Jade is on the line. Jade, how can we help? hi um thank you for having me sure so i'm trying to decide i'm thinking about selling my house i bought it when i was 22 i'm 34 right now so i do have a lot of equity but the house is pretty old it was built like in 1965 so i'm coming up to like having a lot of issues as far as repairs with the house and it's kind of it's just weighing on me financially to where it's causing me to be behind other things because of, you know, the repairs and stuff.

1:50:44I am a single woman with two kids and I'm thinking about selling just to get a fresh start, a new start, but with me selling the house, I was going to try to use that money that I make from selling the house to put down towards a new house and probably like consolidate some of my bills. Okay. And I don't know. Well, Well, tell us about the house. What do you owe on the home? And then tell us what you think you can get for the home. I owe like$63 ,000,$64 ,000 on the house. And I really don't know how much I would get. I have been getting a lot of calls all the time. And they would say like$200 ,000 something, a little less than$300 ,000.

1:51:35Okay. Okay. Well, step one is we want you to go to RamseySolutions.com after this phone call. We want you to look up our real estate page and let's get you with, let's have you talk to two or three of the trusted pros over there. Somebody that knows the Nashville market really well and they're affiliated in the way that they know how we want them to treat you. They're going to treat you well. You go with the one that you have the best vibe with. Make sure that you understand everything. but let's get some real pros, some Ramsey trusted pros out there to tell you what your house is worth and give you a sense of the market and what you might be able to go to.

1:52:15Before we ever really decide on this, we need to know that. You need to know that for sure. Walk Jade through your debt. Walk us through that. I have three credit cards. I mean, all three of them are listed. Two of them is$800, one is$900. I do have school loan debt, but it's in good standing right now. How much? About like$70 ,000. Okay. How much do you earn? I make like$59 ,000,$60 ,000 a year. What's that? What do you take home every month? What do you see? It varies based on overtime. Okay. Give me a good, give me a, in between a good month and a bad month. What is it? Um, I'll say like a good month for a month, um, maybe like 4 ,200.

1:53:21Okay. And a bad month, maybe like 3 ,000, 3 ,500. So here's what I'm hearing. I have a couple of clarifying questions. One, what is your, would you, when you mentioned earlier that it was tight. I do have a car note in there. Okay. Tell me about the car. This is, it's about like$18 ,000 on the car. So when you said earlier that it was tight and it was, it was, you know, money was tight, was it the monthly payment that's tight? Or was it when you're thinking about the repairs, the re, was it the repairs that were really what was frustrating you um it's just the main is to continue like for me my kids just continue living here i would have to keep investing into the house as far as repairing things like things like what like a roof ac unit just recently yes that's down currently right now um i just recently um fixed a leak in my house okay on my roof and i have another one but it's on the back side of the house so I haven't dealt with that really um okay so a lot of things these are higher ticket higher ticket items is what it sounds like um Ken is right I would want to get real numbers around selling the place um I also want you to have some clarity around your numbers it feels like they're they're kind of a guess right now and I have a sense that if you had them in a budget you could make a plan that could possibly really really help you.

1:54:55Do you have a budget? I do. It's probably not the best, but I do have a budget. I'm like, you know, figuring it out. Okay. Well, we're going to send you a better budget. We're going to send you a copy of Every Dollar and give you a subscription for a year so that you can use it so that you can find out what your margin is. Because it might, Jade, just be you needing to get and see how much margin do I have? What would it take for me to cut back a little bit and save up to do some of these repairs? I'm not convinced right away that it's time to sell. But the margin, the budget's going to tell you if you're looking at it and you're in the red most months, then that'd be an indicator.

1:55:36But if you're looking at it and you're finding a couple hundred dollars of margin and you're realizing, man, I could be paying more towards these credit cards and clear those out. I might be interested in seeing this through as long as that mortgage is no more than 25 % of that 4 ,200 every month.

1:56:04You spend hours researching before making a major purchase like a home or car, but it's also a good idea to put in the work searching for the right insurance coverage. To protect your biggest assets, I recommend using Ramsey Trusted Pros. Whether you're looking for car, home, or any other type of insurance, Ramsey Trusted Providers have been coached and vetted to serve you like we would. Find what you need at RamseySolutions.com slash insurance.

1:56:53our scripture of the day comes from first peter 1 verse 6 so be truly glad there is wonderful joy ahead even though you have to endure many trials for a little while our quote of the day from ronald reagan the future doesn't belong to the faint-hearted it belongs to the brave oh i see what they did there. That crypto commercial with Matt Damon tried to borrow a little bit of that. Fortune favors the bull. Do you remember that? I wonder if they were borrowing from this Reagan quote. I just wonder. You might be right. I just wonder. Jennifer is up in San Francisco. Jennifer, how can we help? Hi.

1:57:29Thank you for taking my call. So I have a question. I am super new to the Ramsey Baby Steps and I have kind of a unique situation. situation. Since I'm now on this track and trying to solidify practicing financial literacy, I have a 17-year-old son, and I want to make sure that he doesn't struggle with the lack of knowledge for financial literacy that I did growing up. So how transparent should I be in communicating my mistakes to help him make that foundation starting now using Ramsey principles. Well, I'm just curious. Let's just say that he's in the room and you're asking me, it's like, oh, yeah, yeah, sure.

1:58:15Share the mistakes you really love your son to know about. What would those mistakes be? Well, when I was little, I guess, you know, young getting turned into the world, I didn't understand about budgeting. I didn't know, you know, the importance of, you know, making sure that you, you know, knowing where every cent of your money went with it. And it caused struggles. You know, thankfully now I've worked my way into, you know, a fantastic career and now kind of seeing, oh, you know, I can, I still have time to correct the mistakes that I made. But my most important aspect is making sure that, you know, as a parent, you want better for your child.

1:59:00Yeah. You know, look, I love that answer. Not to be as open. Yeah. Well, I don't think you have to. So my kids, of course, I have a unique situation and my kids roll their eyes every time they see me on a video or anything like that. But, you know, I talk to them about the big picture financial stuff, obviously, in my role here. But my wife and I don't. we don't let them see our budget. We're not, we're not opening up the, that's just something they can't handle, nor do they need to know. However, the reason I asked you that first question, I'm sure that you could say if I was in a room with you and we were whiteboarding your biggest financial mistakes, you said the budget, you didn't budget, you didn't know how to budget.

1:59:39Okay. That's what you probably at some point accumulated some debt. I would talk about those big mistakes and just keep it that simple. And then, and then come alongside of him after you talk about, you know what, I wish someone had talked to me about budgeting. Now I use this thing called every dollar. Let me explain the concept of the budget, right? And you walk in through it and you go, here's why. But I think kids will listen to our pain more than they will our advice. And I know that there have been a handful of times, Jade, I want to bring you in on this, where I have had some moments with all three of my kids, different times, where I realized in talking about dumb things that I did, failures that I had made, they locked in and asked lots of questions.

2:00:25And it started with just pure curiosity. I kind of want to know how dad screwed up because he might be the idiot that I think he is. And in talking about my failures, I was then and only then able to, and most of the time, they'll ask questions and I was able to give some insight into how to avoid that for themselves. I think that's the easiest way to go. Jade, I want you to weigh in on this because I think you get some great insight. Honestly, Ken, I think you got it. Your kids are older than mine. Mine are five and seven. And so we're very low on the sharing category at this point. But I agree with Ken.

2:01:03I mean, I'm just thinking back to the things that I remember that my own parents taught me. And a lot of it was that sort of thing. Don't make the mistake I did. Do this instead. I think there's just a relatable quality there that young adults want to see. They want to see that they're not alone and that you were once thinking some of the same thoughts they're thinking. Does he have his own job? He just got his first job right after he got his driver's license. Great. You know what I think is also the greatest teacher is to let him make some mistakes. And then you'd be there to go, hey, and not correct him.

2:01:39This is going to be very hard, mom, especially a 17-year-old boy who's now distancing himself from you. I'm sure you're already seeing it. And it's a little. I think we're about as close as I could expect to be for having a 17-year-old son. And I'm just telling you, having walked through, I'm just telling you, if Stacey were on the air with you right now, there were things. And again, every situation is different, but they naturally push away from you. And if he makes some mistakes with his own money, Jennifer, your posture needs to be, oh, buddy, I'm so sorry about that. I did something like that.

2:02:09Like, no, I told you so. Or you can't do that. It's got to be, oh, oh, that stinks. I did that. Oh, man, I blew that so many times. Hey, you want my thoughts on how do you avoid that? He's going to need that approach. But I think one of the things we do as parents sometimes is we hover way too much, especially with teenagers, as opposed to be available. Not hover, but be available when they blow it and in the right posture. And I think that's probably the best thing you can do. Thank you for the call. I love that. It's like a good salesperson. You want them, you have to be far enough away that you're not annoying them, but if they need you, they can just...

2:02:49Yeah. What's the old phrase, when the student is ready, the teacher appears kind of a thing? Yeah. And I think with parenting, that's one of the things that I'm so stinking hard. And I'm still in the middle of, I got a 20, an 18, and a 17, but I still don't do that well. But I found that when I can just chill out. They come to you. It's like getting a little birdie to come to you. A hundred percent. They come to us and they're like, I'm like, oh. And I'm learning to just be like, my good friend Les Parrott taught me this is a world-renowned psychologist. He's like, just immediately empathize. Yeah.

2:03:24First thing is, oh man, that stinks. That's got to feel awful. It just like sit in it instead of clean it up. I'm going to remember this. Yeah. I'm tucking this in my back pocket. Well, the parental tendency is to come in and clean up the mess. Oh, you're sitting in your own dookie. Let's get that all cleaned up. Instead of letting them sit in it and go, ooh, that's awful, isn't it? Yeah. It's pretty. Oh, I feel so bad you're sitting in that. How did we get there? What happened? Yeah. And boy, it's so hard to do that, right? Like, what happened? Let them describe how they got in that situation.

2:03:55Crazy. All right, let's go to Sean. See if we can help Sean out on the tails of that call. Sean, how can we help? Hey, guys. Thank you for having me. Hey, I'm glad to have you. Listen, I'm putting you on the spot. We've got about two minutes, so you can hit us with what we can help with quick. Okay. I'm new to making a budget. Never made one before. Maybe it's bad timing on my end here, but I'm going through a career change. New job starts next month, as well as having a child in three months. Yikes. So having a hard time trying to figure out a budget. My income is irregular. I work in sales, and then I'm also in the Army Reserve, and so that income is also different month to month.

2:04:34Okay, you're in good hands with Jade. All right, so what I would do, I would start out by saying, what's the worst month I could possibly have money-wise? With the Armory Reserve, what's the least they could pay me? And with my sales job, what's that base salary that I know I'm gonna get? And I would start there because you truly don't know, it's a new sales job, you don't know what you're gonna make, you don't know if you're gonna knock it out of the park or if it's gonna be a struggle for you. So I would start with that lowest amount and that way I kind of have a sense of, This is the least I could make.

2:05:02And then from there, I'd build the budget and I'd realize, okay, if I have the worst month ever, here's how much in the red I'll be. Or you might discover, oh, even in a bad month, I won't be in the red at all. Right? And so just putting, having some, some real facts to put to this is going to, is going to help with any anxiety you have around it. And then let's say you, you do that and you are in the red. I would just kind of have some be formulating some thoughts. Okay, if that happens and I'm$500 in the red, what would I do to fix it? Start thinking about that. And then as you start to do the job and you start to figure out, okay, this is the regularity.

2:05:37This is kind of what I'm used to making. You'll start budgeting based on that number. But for sales, any irregular income, small business, if you can create a cushion, a decent enough cushion that if you know, hey, it takes$5 ,000 to run my life, I always have a cushion with that$5 ,000 in it. And I'm kind of pulling from it as needed. And it'll take you some time to build that up. But for irregular income, small business, that really, really does help. Yeah. Love that advice. You can do this. Hang on the line. Let's get him into every dollar. Love that, Christian. Let's actually let you start practicing, and you will get really good at it.

2:06:15Christian will take care of you. Thank you, Sean, for the call. All right, folks, remember this. There's ultimately only one way to financial peace, and that's to walk daily with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus.