317: On the road with Miserable Steve Hill

0:00Ellie Gibson: Thumbtack presents Tile Trouble. Every single time I use my sink, I make eye contact with the uneven grout of my kitchen backsplash. The crooked corners eye me and I'm haunted by more tiling questions than I thought possible. What kind of pro can fix a backsplash? Can I replace one cracked tile or should I replace them all? What? What if I just use Thumbtack? I can hire top-rated pros, read reviews, and compare prices with a tap. All on the app. Thumbtack knows homes. Download the app today.

0:32Ellie Gibson: Oh, it's a fan. I shut the one way. I don't want to make too much noise. He's shutting the window now. Can't you strip off? Not again. I love an apple bar. It dry, isn't it? You've got to kind of mix it up in your mouth. Chewing, he's talking about. Yeah, yeah. He's describing chewing. Always a good supper class with eating. Mmm, people love it. I don't know. Okay, let me know when you've finished your mouthfuls. All right. That's what she said. Mmm. Yeah, I can wait. I can really need it. and just give it free. Like the Metro. Oh! Yeah, I'm... Right, sorry. You start and they are... We've only got this Premier in room for 33 more minutes.

1:11Oh, they don't fucking care. They do.

1:13Ellie Gibson: They come and knock on the door. I've had that before. Well, get on with it then. Whatever it is. I had someone at Centre Park turn up at 9.50 once. Cool story. Not checking out till 10am. Scum. I mean... What am I here? Am I here? Am I getting... The amount you pay... It feels like a disciplinary meeting. We brought you here today. What I said was purely in jest. I don't remember. I do not recall. Attitudes have changed, that's all. I'm not wearing... I haven't changed, it's just attitudes. I'm not wearing trousers because I'm neurodiverse. That's what you're saying. Oh, wow. Okay, are we ready?

1:45I hope so. Okay. Born ready.

1:51Hello, scumbags.

1:52Ellie Gibson: This is the Scummy Mummy's podcast. With your hosts, Ellie Gibson and Helen Thorne.

2:03Hello and welcome to the Scummy Mummies podcast. It's me, Helen Thorne. And it's me, Ellie Gibson. Ellie, I'm absolutely thrilled. Today, we're celebrating our 12-year anniversary.

2:13Ellie Gibson: Yes. Oh, I thought you were going to say I'm really thrilled because of our guests like you usually do. But no, you're right. It's a big milestone, Helen. That's what we've been podcasting forever, like a quarter of our lives. Is that right? Yeah, because I'm 46. Yeah. Oh, my God. yes it's it's been a big part of my life and do you know who else has been a big part of my life who steve hill hi steve and he's here today he himself he was the first male guest that we had on the podcast oh and also one of our favorite people so we are thrilled that you're going to join us to celebrate podcasting scummy mummies touring the whole the whole ecosystem of scummy mummies ellie yes now Now, for anyone who's new to the podcast, Stephen, why don't you introduce yourself?

3:01Ellie Gibson: And if you like, describe your journey as part of the Scummy Mummy's ecosystem. Oh, fucking hell. Just woken up. Just for the record, we're in a premier in in Stevenage. I was asleep about 25 minutes ago. Somebody's pulled out, obviously. I don't know what happened. You asked me to go on a podcast. In 2013. Yeah, that was brilliant. I did a few of them. They're all great, actually. really good guest I say so myself really funny sharp not too verbose you get people bang on and on and on no no no keep it tight keep it tight you pass the ball yes then weirdly he said my dad can't drive to Norwich can you drive us to Norwich I've never been to Norwich give it a go give it a go for money I mean the fee was negotiated that led to one thing to another here we are in Stephenish really clammy in here just shut the window yeah so we're sat very close to each other and it's very hot i just had a deep bath so i got that sheen on me oh we wanted to create the uh feeling of being in the van which is often a bit hot and clammy and we sit in a row like this don't we how long have you been riding for us probably five or six years on and off we'll be on a big break for the pandemic.

4:21Ellie Gibson: The pandemic, we do, yes. Weird. What have been your highlights of that time, Stephen? The pay rise. Yep. Just sort of gradually integrating myself onto the stage. Weaseling your way in, you bastard. I thought you're just struggling out there. You need a hand from a man just for the lol. You can't have too many laughs in a comedy show is when you look at it. Can't have too many. Yes. So I add one or two more. He started back of house and he's making his way onto the you're a tart for a laugh you are i know it i know it you love it i think his goal is to replace one of us i think what if one of you to die 12 years ago whenever it was when you when we started the podcast and you came on um i mean none of us knew where this was gonna go did we no still don't we didn't have a plan we just like this is fun we'll do that again and then well you're going very early on the podcast game didn't you that's The world needs now is fewer podcasts.

5:16Yeah. This is it, but we're here now. It's almost like having a fucking mobile phone, having a podcast, isn't it? It's like being in the phone book. It used to be. Yeah, just find my podcast. Yeah. Rubbish. I don't listen to anyone because there's too many. The only podcasts I listen to are the ones that go, you are not having a panic attack. Go to sleep. Sleep.

5:37Ellie Gibson: So when we started all this, the podcast and then the show, did you think we'd be here 12 years later Stephen do you think we'd all be sitting in a premier in room and Stephen it because everyone thinks that don't they you know when the Rolling Stones started they thought yes we're going to be doing this in Ratings that's how people think wish someone would go yep yep that was the plan I manifested this yeah no because no one thinks what what the fucking doing tomorrow do they I think some people do though I think some people start a podcast going oh this is going to be really popular and I'm going to end up making a million pounds and I I know many of those people and many of them are disappointed.

6:09How many of those do you think follow through on that? I think what's been good is that we've had realistic slash low expectations. And that's how I generally live my life. And that's how we choose our employees, isn't it, Annie? Bear min.

6:23Ellie Gibson: Bear min. Had to beg me to be here, as usual. We have to beg you to do anything. It's just part of the dance, isn't it? We do dance. One of my favourite highlights of the tour, we have a lot of laughs, aren't we? We have fun. I will admit, it's occasionally quite funnier. Yes, yes. Oh, my God. At your expense. Often at my expense. But you like it. You enjoy it. Oh, okay. So the whole line... You like being a victim. No, I don't. Don't be rude. Anyway, so highlight Ellie's fart and a truck stopover. Are we going historical? Yeah, that was... We had to drop her off at a truck stop for a big stop.

7:02I drove headlong into a truck at that point.

7:05Ellie Gibson: Can I just say, first of all, I'm sure we've told this story on the podcast before about how, yes, this one time I did a very bad fart in the van. I think it was in the Yeti. It was in the Yeti. Four cabin, yeah. And it was so bad that we had to pull into the first services we came to, which happened to be a trucker's truck stopper. Very murdery. which I'd never been to before, but trust me, it is a whole different vibe to like your regular services with a WH Smith or what's it called now? TJ Hooker. No, anyway, detail is unnecessary. It's a whole different thing. So yes, that happened. But can I say that's the one time I have farted in the van.

7:51Ellie Gibson: Yes, yes. In 12 years. How many times have you two, and I'm going to say you two because you're not as bad as each other, but you're both bad. How many times have you two done it? I go over 100. At least. At least. That's why there's a protocol in place. Yeah, yeah. Announce, open window, release, open other window, clear the airlock, five seconds, maybe ten, carry on with your life. Yeah, very good. But yeah, I just resent the fact that mine is held up. Yeah, but it was especially bad. I think because it was the only one, it's so memorable. Can taste it now. Yeah. Maybe because I'd held it in for ten years.

8:28Yes. I mean. so good um the other one another memory when i think when i think of steve hill i think of the night that we were running very late on a cold rainy night in bristol and steven refused to drive over the suspension bridge which made us even more late and then when we got to the venue um we put a gruffalo costume on a very hot light and it set on fire yes my accident it just fell

8:52Ellie Gibson: out of the thing and it what the costume went on fire and yes you don't like heights so you'd refused to drive so we were late and then the woman who ran the bar got really angry with us and was like um well the the show is just gonna have to start and we were like no no no we are we are the show we're in the show yeah like that's not how that's quite a key part of this show i think yes yes yes the talky bits that that was a real highlight that was good um just going back to uh toilet habits in the van i enjoyed was it last year helen when we had to we'd only been on the road half an hour and we had to pull over and clap them or something yes so that you could run into a pub at 11 in the morning to use the toilet yes like a like a brown water cannon yes it was awful and then i was like i was terrified you have food poisoning but what actually happened listen i'm not proud but i will own this mistake i had bought off the internet some chinese laxative tea called something really bad like shit yourself yeah like sexy lady diet tea um from china diarrhea tea diarrhea tea it's honestly it is very effective and i heard you tried to start out with say well i just had some greasy food and i've been running it that is not a lie all of that is true but i i i just 14 hours ago in a different country i was backed up to that and and this tea is like a bullet you know if you need a clear out woof uh anyway they've had to shut the pub down sadly oh but i was so proud whenever i drive by it i got a blue plaque or brown plaque on the messy messy business yes i was a so we've we've had to accommodate uh my mistake really a lot of oh how could we forget the shit rep tour oh yes we're just down the road and where yes i feel like it's your tale to tell steven you share it with the listener i was feeling very unwell it was just um the country was caked in snow wasn't it yeah it was minus seven and it was a thick thick sort of um layering of snow all around this very idyllic so on the way there i had to pull into a chickatitos and they just saw the terror in my eyes chickatitos tell me would i possibly use your butt this way sir you were dripping in sweat and you looked very worried I said, I'm sorry, it's all up the walls.

11:11Put 50 quid in his top pocket.

11:13Ellie Gibson: You didn't. And that was the start of it. I probably shat every 20 minutes for three days. And because we're such good, supportive friends, we obviously documented this on Instagram stories with the hashtag shit rep. Come here, shit rep, please. I occasionally still get people coming up to me going, I thoroughly enjoyed watching you shit yourself for three days. Oh, no. Best three days of my life. Gripping, gripping content. What a drama that was. So there we are, a few stories that really encompass, but it's really a very highbrow level of humour. Mainly involving shitty. Well, or you breaking down and on the way to Edinburgh, having to replace your car.

11:49That was a fun night, yeah. The Yeti stalled in... Somewhere in the middle of England. Bucklinghamshire, no, Northamptonshire. So I sat in the Yeti between 10pm and 4am, I think. Then this bloke appeared just out of... What, while you were napping in a car? The kind of person who works for the emergency car service at that time of night. He went, I try not to run over the rabbits.

12:15He was the most murdery man I'd ever met. Hop up in the cabin, shut the door. I try not to kill him, breaks me up. Humans, I don't mind. Oh, God. That was a fun night, yeah. Frightening. But let's not forget, what is at the core of our entire business? Bickering. Curries. Oh, yeah. So in the past 12 years, we would have had hundreds and hundreds of curries. And the good thing is that Stephen really likes the variety. He likes to really branch out, really test his palate. I know what I like. I like what I know. Chicken, Jeff, Rosie, Pillow, Rice, Pins, and Cobra.

12:55Ellie Gibson: Every time. Every time. No, but every time as well, you open the menu and you go, maybe I'll have something different tonight. And we go, uh-huh, have what you like, Stephen. We're paying. You knock yourself out. Two minutes later, chicken jar, fraze, ZP, lamb, rice. Two exceptions. At one time, I had that ridiculous platter. It came in like a union jet. I think it was called the Ruby Murray. It was just disgusting. It was all of the meat. It was about eight portions of rice. Yeah. Everything on it. That sick of a dog. And recently, I had that flaming thing that came out and set the fire alarm off.

13:25Oh, the sizzler. So what's the lesson there? Stick to what you know. Yeah, exactly. The sizzler was good, but once the fire alarm had gone off.

13:31Ellie Gibson: Oh, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. But yes, I did mention the bickering there, which I feel is like a key, key tenant. Keeps me awake. Because we are like a family and families have a little bicker, don't they? And Steve and I, we regularly like to bicker as we did yesterday. We like to bicker over what is better, Apple Maps or Waze? An item which I feel I won yesterday when I sent you that chat, GPT evaluation. It confirmed everything I knew. A sleek interface integrated with the iPhone. But not done with anything. more use if you're a deliveroo driver and you want to go for a rat run a two-ton truck i don't really squeeze into little runs you're not driving a truck you're a van you can try and drive it if you want also did say it's don't use the data anyway um helen really as a non not even a driver helen really enjoys that chat yes the majority of our journeys are on the motorways i think you must know there is only one m1 there's only one m40 there's only one m40 but the way is it is a lovely window into my life she says like to enjoy this i find it stultifyingly dull but You know, take the test.

14:31One of the funniest things that you've said to me, Stephen, once was you were backing out of quite a narrow driveway out of a theatre and it was night. And you're like, Helen, it's much more difficult at night. I'm like, what's the same? You went in that way, you can go out that way. I can't see. He was like, now, try closing your eyes and back the car out, Helen.

14:56As a non-driver. Or you did it earlier. Yes. Yes, the sun was out. Yes, exactly right. It's now complete blackness. Yeah. I don't remember that at all, but I haven't.

15:05Ellie Gibson: Yes. Because you two bicker quite a lot, which I quite enjoy, because I often feel like I'm in the middle of the spectrum between a very miserable person and a very happy person, and I'm the fulcrum on which the seesaw tipped. This is like the three bears. One bed is too hard, one bed is too soft, and one bed is just right. Thank you. Who is that? Or one bed always needs to be right. that I will say possibly, just to extend the metaphor. What do you bicker about? Where are the snacks? Usually about food when we're both hungry. You're my feeder. The number of nuts you've put into my left hand. I know.

15:39Or taking the wheel. I know. I like to drive when I was in the middle. You don't like it when Helen's too happy?

15:46Ellie Gibson: No, that is irritating. That's quite irritating. You often bicker about what she's wearing and why it's unacceptable to you. That's bullying. That's why I wear sunglasses. You know, that's straight up bullying it. Yeah, that's... Which you try to do 10 % less, haven't we? Yes. 10 % less than 25. When my mum died, that was a really kind jester that you said, oh, I'll bully you 20 % less. Just for a day. Just for a day. 10%. 10%. Don't get fucky. Don't get cocky. Oh, I know, I know. I enjoyed that. That was lovely. It's just banter. Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm naked now. It's just banter. I just care for you.

16:29That was very kind. Absolutely. But we've all been through some ups and downs. We're in a bit of a downer. We were saying earlier, we're all just getting very old. Like we've all got afflictions. Physically bereft. Yes.

16:43Ellie Gibson: But we do all bicker. But then I feel we always come back together with common ground. Recently, we've got into doing the New York Times spelling bee in the van, haven't we? Oh, that is a joy. And what a way we do it. Yes, I'm very proud. As I'm driving a van, I shouldn't be looking at a mobile phone. So I've introduced the post-it note and we enjoy that very much. Although I was looking at the post-it note yesterday and I did miss a tourney. And then occasionally, when I can't get any more words, rewrite the post-it note or just turn it upside down. Yeah. So, yeah, we write the letters of spelling bee, stick it on the post-it, stick it on the dashboard.

17:20Ellie Gibson: And then, yes, and then we have a lovely... Sometimes we get genius in under 10 minutes. That takes up the first 10 minutes of a four-hour journey. Yeah. Then there's a bit of silence, just lost in your own thoughts. Then Thorne will say, I'm hungry. Yes, I have been. I'm going to eat a wee. Yes, exactly right. I've had some delightful times actually just sitting in pubs on the way to somewhere. That is Ellie's real strength, is finding energy. GPT, but I don't check GPT. Yeah. GPT it now. Lives a life by some very recent technology. Unproven. Used to use the good food guides, the Michelin guides have been to pass now.

17:53Ellie Gibson: They're gone. Because it roots it better. Well, if you're driving the van soon. I know better now than if Steve and Helen are hungry. That is... It's more you do. Best keep your head down. No, it's like a mum at the end of the school holidays with two children. Just like, shut up, shut up, shut up. We'll get there soon. Let them crack on. What's with dinner? Dogs get on toast. I like it, Stephen, when like yesterday, you're so hungry that you start driving really dangerously. Oh, yeah, that was almost... What are you doing? I went from the motorway to a fucking... She always finds these ridiculous places down a country lane.

18:28I sort of went from 70 to about 68 and a half.

18:31Ellie Gibson: Yeah. It was a hunger drive, yeah. Helen can be quite an anxious passenger. But then she's also hungry. Ride or die. I know, exactly right. I'd just like to pretend I'm on the vampire at Chesson to World of Adventures and it's fine. It's all fine. Number of accidents, zero. I'm always happy with the slower speed. But then you're hungrier. I know, but I won't die of hunger, but I will die of accident. Number of accidents, zero. Very good. Number of days hungry, every day. It's okay. You're also both big van snackers. What's your favourite van snacks? Well, we always go to the dry roasted, then I always just have a coughing fail.

19:15I never learn. I know. Well, the other day, Ellie, you were not with us for some reason. I can't remember. And then so Stephen and I, oh, we got a variety of snacks. Oh, what a day that was. Well, that was really fun. We had like a little picnic. Like a buffet. Yes, yes. What did you ask? At a central reservation. Yes. And of course, like we went, oh, well, this will last us like three days. M25, gone. Done. Done in two hours. Yeah. And also, we were both remarking how quickly we both put on weight on the tour. Horrendous, yeah. Yeah. Really pushed the boat out. What's the best meal we've ever had?

19:53I think... I know what you're going to say. Leeds. Oh, no, no. It was Leeds. I thought Leeds IVH was very good. Second Cambridge on my birthday. But you were being grumpy and it really ruined it. On your birthday? Yes. I was sat there fucking sober and you had about eight bottles of wine and the bloke came up and went, look at these cheese, you like that tiny sort of cheese? £48, please. It was you weren't... It was like sat in your fucking grand's front room for three hours with two piss swimming. I was wondering at that. Lovely talk. You were. What you need to do... I was having to have a fucking meal deal in the van.

20:29I'd have had more fun.

20:30Ellie Gibson: It was Helen's birthday. I do get it. I'm staying cold fucking sober. You're cackling fucking hags falling out. Just sometimes take joy in other people's joy. No, never. That's never happened. You can try. Yeah, the Leeds one, all that fancy stuff. That's one of about four members I remember. The only other curry I remember was the one in Litchfield, the goat curry. Which we went to the other night. Yes, with someone else. How many other men do you see? I'm getting hungry now. I need to find us a really slough up lunch. Yes, we do. I can't remember where it was and I can't even remember to be honest what the food was but I remember sitting with yous in a pub garden drinking very pale, very cold rosé which is my favourite summer drink sitting on sofas and who had died?

21:22Ellie Gibson: Tina Turner Tina Turner died also Litchfield yes, and didn't simply the best come on the radio as we said to the guy, too soon she was just the greatest in a field of want. Yes. It's a bittersweet memory because I remember feeling joy and peace and happiness being with my friends but also sadness that Tina was dead. It was just a rank pub with an astroturf and some stellar umbrellas next to a dual carriageway. But something... I think you were moved by the loss of Tina. Or the half a bottle of Whispering Angel. We'll never know. It was very, very movie. And you've also done Scotland. that was a lovely that was a lovely trip and we sat in a in a hot tub together and looked at the moon wait a minute those those trunks were they fit me when i bought them yes oh it was lovely scotland we're going back to scotland not me yeah next word snow is very snowing yes it'll be very very pleasing and also we're going to ireland as well which was exciting Right.

22:26Now we've had a bit of a reflection back, a nostalgic trip, but now let's look forward to the summer holidays. We're in the middle of the school holidays now and I'm sure your listeners, you're all thinking, what the fuck am I going to do with the kids? What are you guys looking forward to for the school summer holidays? What are you going to be up to?

22:42Ellie Gibson: I'm going on a holiday which I need and like but it's funny we saw our friend didn't we lovely big fat Greek mother Olga came last night I'm not insulting her that's her Instagram and she came to the show last night with her comedy partner Rena O 'Connor who were absolutely brilliant and they're doing a show and you should go and look it up and go and see it there Thumbtack presents Uncertainty Strikes I was surrounded the aisle and the options were closing in there were paint rollers satin and matte finish angle brushes and natural bristles. There were too many choices. What if I never got my living room painted?

23:17What if I couldn't figure out what type of paint to use? What if I just used Thumbtack? I can hire a top rated pro that knows everything about interior paint, easily compare prices and read reviews. Thumbtack knows homes. Download the app today.

23:34Ellie Gibson: Amazing. But Olga said to me, I can't come for a curry. I've got to get on a really early flight. and I said, oh, you're going on holiday? And she went, no, it's a family trip. And I went, no, but you're going with your kids and your partner and you're going to a villa in Spain. It's a family, it's a holiday. And she went, no, it's a family trip. A holiday is when you rest and relax and recharge. If you go anywhere with your children, especially teenage children, it's just a trip that you're on with your family and you just have all the same problems. I don't mind. Holidays are shit. I don't do it.

24:06Holidays are rubbish. You don't have to have it. It's marketing. It's like you don't have to smoke. You don't have to go on holidays. No. That's why people think it's compulsory.

24:14Ellie Gibson: And Reena said, that's right. A holiday is when you go away with your, like, girl mates. By yourself. And, like, to a spa. And then you can properly have a break. Right. Get the dictionary on. I think it's an interesting reframing of the language, Helen. I think so. I think where you can have a nap whenever you want, drink whenever you want, all the things. That is a holiday. Yeah. A trip is different. Like next week I'm taking my son to Berlin and we've got a schedule of like historic walks and museums and things like that. That is a trip with my son. That's not a... Welcome to Semantics Weekly.

24:48I've been out. The most semantic of things. What's selling my countdown on? Right into countdown. See if she'll do it. I've forgotten her name there. And you're off to Bournemouth? I've spent a lot of time in Bournemouth. Hence this amazing tan, which you can't see on the wireless. He's the colour of a toffee apple. It's unbelievable. It's lovely. Gorgeous legs and arms. Yes. I know. A golden glow. Really brings out the best.

25:12Ellie Gibson: I think it's fake tan like you dye your hair. I think it's Saint Tropez. I wouldn't. I've missed a bit of it. Oh, he's exposing his thigh in my Premier Room. Oh, dear. That's the natural colour. That's the tanned colour. I always love it when we have to do things in one of our Premier Room rooms. And I always wonder what the cleaners think. That this one man is going to this hotel room with these two women. Only fans. Check the Only Fans. Offer with a try. First month is an introductory price. then it's$4.99 a week. I said we should do a podcast called Only Vans. Do it live. Just live stream the van.

25:43Only van. That will be an 18 plus patrons only.

25:46Ellie Gibson: You could live stream the van. Yeah, that's something new. Write in listeners if you'd like us to live stream. They could do the spelling bee with us. That would be absolutely dog shit boring. I'd do that today. You have one viewer. He's gone. Yeah, exactly. Well, I'm very much looking forward to the next 12 years. Yes, please. That would be lovely. I couldn't decide if you were going to say lunch or the next 12 years. Both, actually. More so than lunch right now, to be honest. Where are we going? Somewhere nice. I find it so nice. Thank you, Stephen. No, thank you for letting me sit in this very hot room.

26:20We're going to have another shower.

26:21Ellie Gibson: No, but thank you for the last decade. Thank you for your service, but also your companionship, your humour, your companionship. She's got her fingers crossed. Hang on. Hang on. almost like she means it well thank you for keeping me on my toes thorn thank you for the constant snacks oh i know i keep you feeder they're keeping my weight oh an unhealthy level i would hate to think how much weight i put on in this tour but you know couldn't you put a number on fun no you can't 69 oh you're oh come on yeah do you know what my other favorite number is 62 Why is that? Keir Starmer's age. Keir Starmer's age!

27:00Keir Starmer's 62! Can you believe it? Also born in 1962. I know! It's a magic number. That will only be true for a brief time.

27:08Ellie Gibson: Yeah. We talk about this at least once a day in the van, Keir Starmer only being 62. I mean, actually being 62, he looks so much younger. He looks 48, would you? Probably. He looks like a good solid lay. Yeah, gliding like a tree. Should I continue? Move on to the other one? Five-year plan? Yep. Yes. Oh, well, we'd better go as well, because we've got to clear all the fucking broken glass away from behind the door. That was a shame. That was a shame. What happened last night, Stephen? Well, I thought it was packed well. Come on. Somebody opened the door. Broken glass. Yeah. We have a prop in the show that's an empty wine bottle.

27:46Not anymore, you don't.

27:47Ellie Gibson: Not anymore. Oh, well, do you know what, Ellie? You and I will have to have a bottle of wine at lunch. Yes, and keep the bottle. Yes. Yes, because the bottle fell out of the back of the van and it smashed all over the ground and it was dark. And then we obviously, we better clear up at least what we can of this broken glass so it doesn't damage our tyres or someone else's. And Steve had just picked up a free copy of the Metro and we said, can we use your newspaper to collect? No, you didn't. You said, get it back, get it back. I said, why not wrap it in newspaper like a normal person and gave you one sheet of newspaper followed by another, which was ample.

28:17We had to beg for the second sheet. Because I don't want you using the crossword up. I had to fucking carry it anyway. My wrist, my newspaper, my blood.

28:28Ellie Gibson: Gave us one sheet of newspaper. Initially to wrap it and then a second one to seal it. More than enough. It was so thin and so dangerous. I fucking carried it. Dangerous. To me. No blood was shed. Very much. I might go back in the bin and retrieve that fucking bit of the metro. Not the middle bit. It was a guide to summer or something. You can have that. So much top bounce on the road. It's just never ending. listen let's it ends today we've got we've only got this premiere in for three more minutes oh shit yes all right we must go i need a dog poo oh god on that bombshell okay thank you so much for listening i hope it was worth it i'm so sorry okay bye-bye if you want to come and see us on tour you might even see miserable steve at one of our gigs um do come and come and hang out with us and enjoy more top bands like this, plus some actual jokes that we've written, go to scummymummies.com for dates.

29:23That's right. And we'd love to see you there. All right. Bye. Bye. Sounded incident. Bye.

29:29Ellie Gibson: No, we would love to see you there. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, sir. So you may next downstairs. See you later. Bye. Bye. End it.

29:48Thornton's pointing at a phone call. Okay, sorry, sorry. So we could take a commercial break there. When I'm in Premier in Stevenage, I like to eat fruit and oat bakes. How are you? By Go Ahead. Yeah, where's milk? This is a podcast. Can I call you back? I left my phone in my room because I'm a professional. Yes. I'm going to have to get some new clothes. I'm not being in fucking Tenko. All right. I would go, Danny, but I'm glad you're safe. I love you. I'll text you soon. I love you. I love you. I love you. Bye.

30:48Ellie Gibson: Download the app today.