"Get That On Socials Guys!" Abbey's Vibration Plate & Attic Mice Squatters | AMA

0:01Whoever said good things come to those who wait, never shop Black Friday early at Lowe's. Right now, get up to 50 % off select major appliances. Plus, get free delivery, free haul-away, and free basic installation and parts when you spend$896 or more on select major appliances. Shop Black Friday early in-store and online now at Lowe's. Valid through 12-2 while supplies last. Selection varies by location. See associate at Lowe's.com for details. This message is brought to you by today's sponsor, Walden University. Set a course for change. Now is the time to make a real change in your life, career, and community.

0:40At Walden University, we give you the support and flexibility to get the W. Walden's online programs are designed for working professionals like you. You'll gain hands-on skills to take on real-world challenges and succeed. Your future is waiting, and Walden is here to help you achieve it. Take the first step to make your impact. visit waldenu.edu walden university set a course for change certified to operate by chev well apparently they're doing like microscopic implantar controllers i've been controlled for years you're so funny is anyone on their deathbed oh my god i'm dying i never did a marathon i'm exhausted on my bloody power please i'm exhausted watching you on that power play we'll get that on socials guys.

1:30Okay guys, we'll get that out on socials. Don't ever do that voice again. Hello and welcome to The Therapy Crouch with me, Abbey Clancy. Me, Peter Crouch. And me, Gaz. Hello guys, how are we? Good. Happy Thursday. Happy Thursday. God, is it Thursday already? It's Thursday already. Oh my God. How have you been? What are you up to? Yeah, busy, busy. We're just kind of renovating our house, aren't we, in a moment? So we just took his to school, when nothing's been done until then we came here. No, we have got the most incredible builder in the world, Adam. Yeah, I'm not blaming Adam. But, you know, he is waiting for materials, you know.

2:09Oh, yeah. And, you know, the delays and the delays, it's, you know, it's not looking likely we're going to be in for Christmas, which I'm brokenhearted about. And we've got mice in the attic. You haven't? Yeah. Oh, my God. So, um... You got really upset about that, didn't you? I don't want a fucking mouse in my house. And also, they're in there and not me. I've got house envy of these mice. Double standards. Little mice, I think that's, you know, it's getting colder now. If you were a little mouse and there's a little crack, you'd get into a nice house, you wouldn't you? Yeah, I suppose, yeah.

2:48If you look at it from a mouse's perspective, it's having a great time. Or the mice perspective. I know nothing, in fact, next to nothing, about building a house and materials, but all I know over the years, it's got incredibly, A, more expensive and B, harder to source. Is that right? That's Brexit for you. Is that what it was? Is that what changed it? Yes. Well, yeah, I think so. Anything that you order overseas, it's, you know, coming in, taxes. Oh, I see. Materials. Materials, labour costs. You know, yeah, it is a big expense, but it's going to be our forever home, so. Oh, yeah, listen, you know, we're not begrudging that.

3:24We just want it fucking done. Yeah, exactly, yeah. Unfortunately, it's taken time. But you said you were blown away today when you went there, you know. I just, I'm blown away every time I go there. I just think, oh my God, it will be, it will be beautiful. Yeah, absolutely. It just feels like home, even though it's still a building site. It's just, it feels good. What do they say? The juice is worth a squeeze. You just got to keep squeezing for a bit. And I think, you know, when you look at anybody building a house, no matter what your budget is. You blow it out of the water. You blow it and you...

3:57Regret it. You near bankrupt yourself on any single budget. So yeah, that's where we are. So she split up over it. To be honest, we haven't rowed over those. We haven't really, no. No. You just got a bit pissed off with me then when you thought I was throwing a hissy fit for it not being done. I'm just gutted. No, I wasn't really, babe. I could see you upset. No, you left me? You walked out? No, because you... I could see, you know, when things stress you out sometimes, you creeps into how you speak to people, I think. And it was creeping in. That's how I left. Because you were angry about the situation, I could see you potentially taking it out on me.

4:39That's how I left. Anyway, we've got to help people. Come on. Yeah, okay, yeah, lovely. Sophie, she says, Hi, absolutely love listening to all the little secrets, confessions and hilarious stories people send in so i thought it was about time i shared my own little secret firstly i have to say you two have been a huge part of our lives for over the last couple of years we've trained for and completed two london marathons together raising over 25 000 pounds wow for our local cancer charity that's incredible so good and let me tell you your podcast has gotten through some seriously long training runs anyway back to my little secret I had a massive crush Can I just say first I don't know how anyone can complete a marathon Do you know what I mean You know I did that 5k obviously I've never run in my life and it took me by surprise it was supposed to be a kid's 2k and it turned out to be a professional 5k but I literally couldn't breathe Yeah And I don't How many miles is 5k?

5:3626 Oh 5k Is that 3.5 was it? Yeah 3.2 3.2 So how someone could do 7 times the amount No I'm with you I cannot comprehend. Do you think you'll go to the grave without ever having done one? Because I think I'm the same. It's just one thing I'll never do. No, I'll never do it. Does anyone on their deathbed go, oh my God, I'm dying, I never did a marathon? Yeah, I think they do. Do they? Who does that? Because the self-achievement and the hard work, determination, perseverance. I'm not diminishing a marathon achievement. I think it's amazing. It's incredible. It's incredible. What about Eddie? Is that all did seven marathons in like seven days?

6:20No, it's like 55 in 57 days. 55 like marathons. He must be so fit. Oh yeah, that's sensational. Yeah, but that's just insane. It is insane. I'm exhausted on my bloody power plate. Lying on it. Unbelievable. I'm exhausted watching you on that power plate. I just bought this power plate and I'm just trying to just shake some fat off me. Shake some fat off what your mama gave you. Shake the fat off. Shake the fat off, yeah. Do you not think that's a lazy way to kind of get rid of... It is a lazy way, but I'm actually not doing it for that purpose. I'm doing it for kind of, you know, lymphatic purposes, toning.

7:04I follow this lady on Instagram who's amazing, who just does all this work on a power plate, and her body is like... So I'm just copying her, basically. Anyway, back to my little secret. I had a massive crush on one of my closest friends at Run Club. For ages, I tried to fight it, played it cool, pretended I wasn't interested. You know the usual things you do when you're secretly head over heels with someone. But eventually I crumbled and I thought, sod it, I'm making a move. So mid-run one morning, I jogged alongside her and started asking her a few questions about her. How can you chat and run at the same time?

7:37No, it's hard to do. I reckon we could do it. A running pod. Just jog and chat. I can't run. You can, baby. You did 5K the other week. I know, but I walked the last... You did in three days, but it was... No, I did it in 36 minutes. Thank you very much. That's a good time. It's a good time. I walked a third of it as well because I had a stitch so bad. Did you? I literally couldn't even stand up straight. I was bent in half with the stitch. Really? Does your brother not put you through your paces? Which? The high rocks. No, he said he could do some online thing, but I was like, I haven't got a laptop, honey.

8:08I won't do it. oh well she told me um she was the sort of person who never wanted to settle down didn't believe in marriage and generally just wanted to be a free spirit i stuck at it and i ran with her for weeks and weeks and let me tell you it was the best decision i've ever made in my life because that girl i used to follow around is now my fiancee that's right somehow i've managed to convince a girl who has always said she never wanted to marry to marry me and the funniest thing she was right there in front of me all along So I suppose the moral is that there really is someone out there for everyone.

8:43Abby, you're an absolute queen. We both love listening to you and P. P, you're a hilarious and absolute football legend. Any marriage advice for someone who's managed to convince the woman who never wanted to get married to walk down the aisle? And these are two brides to be, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I called her. I read it and I didn't call it. Yeah, I could just tell. So what's she asking? Marriage advice. Marriage advice. to someone who never, who was never going to be really married on the cards. Well, I think, you know, I can't speak for everyone, but I think, you know, if you are one of those people who say, I never want to settle down, I don't want to get married, maybe it's because you haven't met the right person.

9:25And when they do come into your life and, you know, there's that when you know, you know thing. Like, I knew it instantly with you and you knew it instantly with me. I think all the things that you wanted to do, like as a single person. You just look like her. Oh, fuck. Jesus Christ. No, I think all the things that you wanted to do in the first place, like say, I don't know, whether you wanted to go travelling or she wants to do, you know, live her own life, be independent, do this and that. Isn't it better to do it with someone that you really want to do it with? With someone you love? Yeah. Like, I think you can do all those things that you wanted to do in the first place, but just do them together and have a laugh with someone doing it.

10:02I never want to do anything without you. No, well, I am the same with you. I love being with you No you don't I do You actually prefer golf That's not true That's not true No I don't prefer golf There's a time and a place for that There's no time and place for whatever that was But I love spending time with you We'll go a separate way straight after this But I've enjoyed every moment You guys are hilarious Verizon knows that holiday math can be complicated. Okay, let's see. We got the four kids, four gifts each, six teacher gifts. Wait, oh, what did we get in? Sandy and the dogs. Oh, I can't forget the dogs.

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11:27Shop Black Friday early in-store and online now at Lowe's. Lowe's. Valid through 12-2 while supplies last. Selection varies by location. See associate at lowes.com for details.

11:40Claire D says, hi guys, love the pod. We need to shout out for our Claire. It's her birthday today. Big shout out to our Claire, whose birthday it is today. Claire, you are the best. We could not live without you. So happy birthday. Happy birthday. Claire's RPA. I was like, why haven't you put it in the diary? She's like, I'm not putting my own birthday in your diary. I was like, please. because then, you know, I'll forget. Because I won't forget it's a birthday, but I don't know what day it is, like, on a daily basis. Our present to her today is to not call her. Really? Well, I reckon that would be a breath of fresh air for her.

12:14No, Claire literally does every single thing in our life. So it's like, she's left me incapable. Yeah, well, we love her. We love her and we hope she has the best birthday, separate birthday. Okay, well, you know, Claire D says, Hi, guys, love the pod, although you've given me sleepless nights. what is the trick you learned in Norway I can't sleep wondering what is this yeah yeah you never said it's cracking basically I'm not going to give anything away Av can put something in your hand without you knowing it takes all her power and presence to do it and she gets so tired after it so she can't do it right in front of you now No.

12:57Because it just drains her so much. Yeah. And we'll do it for our socials. Will you? We'll do a social. We'll do it. Okay. Can you believe I'm saying our socials? That's so fucking cringe. We'll get that on socials, guys. Okay, guys, we'll get that on socials. Don't ever do that voice again. If you ever want me to snag you. That's the socials. Hey, guys. hey guys welcome to my channel is that still a thing welcome to my channel I think so yeah like comment subscribe all that up front people still do all that shit oh yeah yeah yeah fucking hell no wonder we haven't got any subscribers get over my dead body am I saying like link and subscribe don't you have to do it like you're from Texas honey it's always like Americans she's from Texas stuck there I see the kids Kids are always doing it Aren't they Kids are always listening To yanks Like link and subscribe Yeah And if you are listening Please do as we say And like comment And subscribe But where did link go from Where did link go Like comment subscribe It was like Link Like link And subscribe Normally I don't know It used to be Was it link Maybe it was like Link to the channel Here click the link Yeah maybe that was it Like hit the link But if someone asked me To like post a link I nearly have a heart attack Like how It's also like there's so much new stuff coming on.

14:24I'm actually excited for this cyber attack. So we don't have to do all this shit. I hope they take everyone down. Then go back to pen and paper. You know the human body's like losing the ability to write. People's fingers are getting longer, aren't they? And the fingers like... Have you heard that? You know what's your phone? In like a million years... You know holding your phone like that? You see the little fingers? It's taken all the way. We're going to have like a little webbed hand by the end of it. A tech hand. Yeah, so it's becoming like more webbed out. So it can grasp. So because it's been holding the phone.

14:54So the front, the index finger's going to go really long and this one is going to be like a little stub at the end just to like, there's like a little shelf for the eye thing. It's going to be a dessert. That little finger eventually in 100 years time will be a shelf for the phone. You're going to have your own shelf. Oh my God. By then, it will all be probably just a little chip and you'll be doing it on. Well, apparently they're doing like microscopic implants that go through the air and go in you and implant in you and then they can control us. Have you heard that? I've heard that. Are they controlling us?

15:27No, not yet. I've been controlled for years. Not yet. I was putting a thing in my ear. You're so funny.

15:40The weird thing is... Oh, she needs a bite here. No, it's not a bite. You are, you're going to get angry. The sick thing is, you've never, ever been controlled. It was a joke. You're full of shit. Relax yourself. God. Stop trying to control me.

15:57Breathe, just breathe. I don't want to control you anyway. Okay, all right, we're done. I will reveal the trick, but I'll do it to you, and we'll film it and we'll put it out there. Okay. I'm so excited by this. I don't even know what to expect. So you should be. Well, we were on fire because we were in Norway and we gathered around the fire and playing games and things like that. And we did all our best tricks because they were all quite new people who didn't know our tricks. It was fresh meat. It was fresh meat. And me and Abra in a magic circle. I love fresh meat. We've done it so many times to our own friends that they're bored.

16:28But when we get new meat, it is fantastic. Fresh meat. Fresh meat. Either or. You're like little Marvin's magic over there. The excitement when we go on a night out and have fresh meat. Oh my God, I love it. So good. I love it. You just would love to go out of V &A. We are a hoot. You're in for a treat. A fucking hoot. Or stay in with us because we don't go out. Staying in with us is unreal, actually, isn't it? If you're new, some of our games are world class. Oh, yeah. We're just great company, aren't we, babe? Oh, yeah. Well, I am. I carry you. Do you think? Yeah. No way. I think we complement each other well.

17:07I think people would probably think they'd prefer to hang out with you, but in reality. You're... Am I doing that? Itchy. Flaky scalp. I remember our first night together. Relieved by a seizure.

17:28I remember having a night with you two, and we ended with dirty dancing lift. Do you remember that? Yeah. That was, yeah, almost fell in the pool. that's one of ours isn't it I'm not doing that anymore because you dropped me last time no you went over the back I went over the back of your head nearly broke my neck don't give up baby don't give up it's because of you I'm too strong I don't know how I'm stretching

17:55ok right Colin says hi guys I had an absolute howler here I need your advice I'm in my final year of uni in Durham we've started doing all our paperwork for our final theses. The lecturer I've been paired with to help me bring it home is called Alan. Alan and I have gotten on well for a couple of years and he's very good at what he does, which makes what happened yesterday even more mad. Is he AI or is he a human? I think he's a real man. He's a lecturer. Yeah. Because they all do it on the... thing down there. Chippie-T, chat chippie-T. I was sat in the lecture hall and we were put in groups of four to do some brainstorming and someone turned to me and started goofing around and said, what if we get shit grades at the end of the year?

18:41And what if the lecturers secretly hate us and are leading us up the garden path with our thesis? I, for seemingly no reason at all, declared, well, if that happened to me, I'd probably say something like, suck my ass, Alan. I said that last part in American accent. Suck my ass, Alan. Suck my ass, Alan. Everyone went quiet, not a peep. I turned around and stood behind me, listening to the whole conversation was, you guessed it, Alan. I just buried my head in my hands. Suck my arse, Alan. That doesn't sound like something I'd even say. It's not even a common insult. I literally have no idea what possessed me.

19:16He didn't say anything, just stared for a bit and walked on. I've got another two-hour lecture with him tomorrow, but I plan for the sickie to take it off because I can't face it. Pete, Abs, Gaz, what do I do? Colin, Garan. That's the classic, isn't it? They're behind me, aren't they? And then you turn around and there they are. I did that in school once. Did you? And someone was saying, like, it was in primary school. I remember we had this teacher called Miss Getty. And, like, if someone, like, farted in the class or something, she'd, like, spray you with her fresh shirt. Like, terrifying she was.

19:53And one girl in my class, like, knowing you had to go up to the desk and read, she actually weeded herself at the desk because she was that scared of her. Nervous. But I remember saying that I heard a fart. You just made it up? Yeah, I made it up. She was behind me. And she was like, you are? You said you heard her fart Miss Getty? Yeah. Oh, my God. I said, she's just farted. And she was behind me and heard me. Oh, my God. What was that like? I've never been so scared in my entire life. Yeah. I was in so much. I was in trouble with her on a daily basis. She used to hate me. I remember when I smashed...

20:34She told no one to open the window. And I opened the window. And, like, there was a statue of Our Lady smashed on the floor. Oh! Got locked in the cupboard for that one. You got locked in the cupboard? What? Like Miss Trunchbull? Yeah. In the chokey? Oh, terrifying. So, can I ask, what's Our Lady? Jesus' mum. Oh, sorry, right. Oh, yeah. send one up more queen our lady Jesus' mum were they the nuns they're like the nuns she wasn't a nun did she go to a nun school I went to a Catholic school oh there was nuns teachers there wasn't there there was yeah but she was alright Sister Marie was she yeah I liked her I never knew it was about you that's mad wow your punishments were slightly different obviously in our time and then our parents time before that and their parents time my dad used to get the cane that's what I mean I mean that's awful but I remember having to sit at the wall.

21:32So face the corner. Yeah, same. Have you had that one? Do you remember when you're literally looking at the wall like that? I used to be in isolation. That's bad, isn't it? When you reflect on it, that's childhood trauma, infliction, right? Yeah, pretty bad, isn't it? And the dunce hat. Dunce hat? I miss that, but yeah, dunce hat. I remember the one teacher, I was leaning back on my chair, leaning back on the chair. No, he pinged the fucking chalk off my forehead. What a shot. No, I was right at the back as well. I was like, Holly. Just leaning back and the chalks went poof. Oh, my God. Do you remember the chalk?

22:07He's just writing on this board of chalk. Chalk board, yeah. I used to fall asleep all the time in science and then you just get on the desk. Bang! On the desk.

22:18So scary. Science is a mad one because science, they're very professor-y. They can't really control the class. They're incredibly clever. I remember one teacher, we'd go in there and he'd go like, first two benches are work and the rest you can do what you like, basically. So I'd be in the back messing about and then I'd come to the front and he'd go, Peter. And I'd see his face and he'd be so buzzing. He'd go, are you going to do some work today? And I'd be like, yeah. No. He'd be so proud of me and I'd be like, but it made me feel good that he felt good. So then I would actually stay. It's like reverse psychology.

22:54I like damn science. I liked science. It wasn't the worst one. Physics, not so much. Yeah, there was three, wasn't there? Biology, chemistry, physics. What's the one where you play with, Bunsen burner? Is that chemistry? Chemistry was the best. Chemistry. I like biology. Did you? Biology's the best one, I thought, personally. Photosynthesis and all that jazz. Oh, God. Really? I used to love that. Osmosis. Biology's good, you know. You dissected the mouse as well, didn't you? I didn't dissect a mouse. Did you not? No. Oh, we did. We opened up a mouse and did all that. Oh, I doubt that, Pete. I slept with life.

23:23You've been watching too much E.T., you. I swear in my life I dissected a mouse, did I? I remember taking this little heart out, this little liver. Oh, as if. I've dissected a mouse. Really? You haven't. Yeah, I have. I swear in my life. You haven't. Oh, I have. I have. You haven't? It would be a weird thing for him to lie down. Why are you telling me I haven't dissected a mouse? Because that just wouldn't happen. But I'm telling you it did. No, you used to peel the onion and get the different layers of memory. Oh, yeah, sorry, yeah. I was peeling an onion. Sorry. They're not with a peel. I knew it.

23:53Let's get one out of your attic and then we'll have a go and see if you can remember. I got totally wrong. Listen, I could dissect a mouse at any point. I can't imagine that. There's a little liver, a little heart, see the intestines. Oh, as if. Listen, we've got mice in our new house now. You watch me, I'll catch it, dissect it and tell you exactly what goes on in there. You will not. Will? Anyway, where were we? Just to round this off then, so advice for this guy. What do you do about that? I just... You've got to go in front of these things, I think. You want to put a sticky? No, you've got to go in and front it.

24:23Because then you'll put a sickie forever. You put one sickie, it's ten times worse. Yeah, avoidance will only kind of bite you in the ass or suck you in the ass later on. He's gone for that slur. It's just outrageous. At the end of the day, this teacher's a human being as well. He'll probably find it funny and be like, oh, he could just say, God, sorry, sir. Alan, I was a shocker there. Sorry, sir, I was messing around. yeah like someone said that you guys are going to mess us up and I said that and you know I didn't really mean suck my ass suck my ass that is good advice actually that's sage sage advice great advice we've done it again some great advice we're getting good at this babe we are we are finally we're turning into actual therapists okay well that's that's all you're getting for today guys like link and subscribe and you'll get some more See you on our socials Can I get a stroke on my leg this today?

25:21Do you want me to stroke it? No, it's not even a nice fabric It's like a Okay, okay Okay, bye Ask me anything Sure, bye

25:48battery kit three for free you better believe it plus select ladders are up to 50 off so go ahead get in there early shop black friday deals in store or online now at lowe's valid through 11 18 while supplies last free tools vary based on battery kit purchased and location