Love Island or Lust Island?

0:00Emmy Noms came out this week, and among the Knight of the Seven Kingdoms and America's husband Sterling K. Brown is Ariana Maddox, cementing her rise from sexy, unique restaurant employee to the host of summer's hottest reality show, Love Island, USA. The premise for those who don't know, 12 very photogenic 20-somethings, six boys and six girls, enter a villa in Fiji where they get into straight people shenanigans. Along the way, even hotter 20-somethings come to try to break them up, and viewers at home get a hand in what happens. The show is more popular than ever. It was streamed for over 2 billion minutes just in the first two weeks.

0:41But this season feels different from past ones. And it's not just because of all the toe-sucking. Coming up on Today Explained from Vox, what happens when the red pill goes beyond real life and comes for reality TV, too. Support for Today Explained comes from Adio, the AICRM. The CRM you use says a lot about how fast you want to move with Adio, the AICRM revenue compounds around the clock. Connect your email and calendar and Adio instantly builds your CRM around your business so you're ready for action from day one. With universal context, Adio's intelligence layer, every customer signal compounds into one surface your whole business runs on.

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2:05To put AI to work for people, visit ServiceNow.com. It's Today Explained. I'm John Glenn Hill filling in today. Brooke Lemantia writes about culture for the cut, and she wrote a piece titled, Is This the Least Sexy Season of Love Island Ever? So naturally, I wanted to ask her how a show about finding love in bikinis got unsexy. But first, for those who have never taken a trip to the villa, Brooke, what is Love Island? Well, first of all, that's like such a beautiful place to be. And I'm really envious of those people's brains. But yeah, Love Island is a reality TV show that started in the UK around 2015.

2:49It came to the US in, I think, 2019. And it's basically just like a dating show where a bunch of hot young people go to a villa. They're cut off from the world. It's like as live as you can get. So they're there right now. So these people that we're watching are in Fiji as we're speaking, and they try to find love. Yeah, toast to new beginnings. Yes, and toast to hopefully falling in love and finding the man of our dreams. I'm Trinity. I'm 22 years old, and I love love. So Love Island USA, find me my man. I'm not going to find my wife in a nightclub. I might find my wife at a run club or at a museum.

3:28Just dumb to put it out there. And they're trying to win money, too, right? And they're trying to win money. But I feel like the money has never been, like, the point. Like, I don't know. It's such a silly concept. I get to the end every year and I'm like, I forget that there's money involved because it feels so, like, afterthought, you know? What makes this show, you know, work as a real I'm here to find love show versus some of the other dating reality shows we have out there? I mean, I think this season is different. But in the past, I feel like it actually has been quite genuine because it's a lot of people coming into one space and all you're thinking about is like, do I like my connection?

4:08Do I like this person? And so you can talk to everyone. And it's a show where you, like The Bachelor, for example, it's one boy and like 30 girls. Like that's crazy. That's never going to work. That's weird. So it's like this at least it's equal boys and girls. You're like thinking about who you're attracted to and then who you have good conversations with. and who you want to share a bed with. I did want to ask you if you wanted to sleep together, if you wanted to share a bed tonight. We can cuddle or piddle for it, but we'll figure that shit out later. Okay, yeah. We'll figure that out later.

4:41I'm not opposed to it. Yeah, cool. There's all these different layers that make it more real when it comes to dating, as real as you can get. All right, tell me about your family. It's always been my mom, brother, and I. Okay. And then my grandma pretty much raised me too. Oh. So it's, you know, I'm just a grandma's boy. I love my grandma. Grandmas are the best. That's like my lady. And I think that has like led to the success. There's people that are married and have babies and that's like pretty good to me, you know? You wrote a piece for The Cut titled, Is This the Least Sexy Season of Love Island Ever?

5:18Is Love Island no longer sexy? What is going on with my fun tropical bikini show? What changed? Yeah, I mean, everyone's still in bikinis. Everyone's still hot. That's the thing. Everyone's hot. That hasn't changed. But I think the way that they've engaged with sex and with kissing and with, like, anything physical has really, really changed from old seasons. And it's not as fun to watch. It's ultimately kind of gross to watch. And it's like, I don't need to see everyone kiss every single day because, like, they're being forced to in a challenge. Like, there's no genuine and, like, natural romantic and sexual tension left in the villa, it feels like.

5:59And that is where I think it's lost the plot and it's, like, not as sexy as it has been. And it's never really been a show. I mean, people were having sex on the early seasons of UK. But I would still argue that, like, it's even that this feels somehow worse. And for those who don't know, challenges are what they call essentially games they have Islanders play, usually set up like a competition with boys against girls or couples against each other. Can you say more about how the challenges were different this season? I mean, the show has always been couple forward. You like couple up with a partner.

6:35You guys share a bed. And so it's always very like, what's going to happen in bed? Are we going to cuddle? and there's like a very clear thing of like the couples will put the covers up over their head and that means they're like kissing and doing stuff and but more and more and especially this season they have all involved like extremely heavy making out right away so I think I was counting all the bombshells that came in and they all started by making out with everyone which is weird like imagine you enter a villa you're half naked you don't know these people and then you're Like, I'm just going to stick my tongue down everyone's throat and see what happens.

7:11Yeah, it's strange. It's not a normal way to say hello. Everybody gets to make out! Woo! I mean, it used to be like every challenge would be like, okay, maybe kiss an islander that you're interested in. And it would be like a cheeky little, like, let me do a slight little peck of this different islander that's not my couple that maybe I'm intrigued by. And it was sexy and, like, low-key and kind of, like, flirty, but not, like, ass-grabbing, tongues everywhere, porno vibes. What is your favorite sex position? Is it missionary, doggy, or cowgirl? I love this game. I don't ever sit down with a girl on a first date and I'm like, my name's Sean, I like doggy style.

7:58You know what I mean? I'd be a serial killer. And you're going to see who you can lick the longest, and then you're going to suck every single toe. Finally, our prince will test out every girl's toes. I was doing splits on the dick. I was doing splits on his head. I was doing backbends. I even sucked a man's foot. I've never done that in my life, let alone on national television. And then if you win, you get to jump into a pot of slime. Like, it doesn't make any sense and it doesn't do anything for the plot except cause everyone to, like, feel that their bodies aren't theirs almost. Like, it almost feels like now you walk into the villa and there's an understanding that, like, people are going to grab you and kiss you and suck you and tickle you and, like, you just have to do it and be okay with it.

8:43Oh, sex! Sex! Sex! Trinity, you have to do the beat! Yeah, it like commodifies everyone's bodies in a weird way that makes it uncomfortable to watch and not as fun. I think it's so interesting because on one hand, the show is a little more sexed up than it has been in past seasons. But Gen Z, which is the generation that's primarily on the show, is having less sex than ever. I wonder how you think about that, like how you square those two things. Yeah, I mean, I think it's that's always a sentiment that's interesting to me because I'm technically Gen Z. So I feel like I watch your people. Tell me of your people.

9:26I'm like my people. I don't I don't know. Like, we get this rep that we are not having sex. But I think it's just it's because then we get on shows and we do stuff like this. And it's like you've never even like you grab an ass like you've never even seen an ass before. And it's like, have you seen an ass before? We need to think about these things. Like, there's like no, there's no, it's not shame. I will say, I think it was hard with this and it's hard with criticizing this show because there's a world where it was really like women weren't allowed to be sluts, men weren't allowed to be sluts.

9:59And I think it's really great that people are embracing like sexiness and sluttiness and it feels like you can kind of do what you want. I think that's amazing and I think people should live their truth in that way. but it's like performance art almost in a way where it's like we're doing this because we're on this show but it doesn't feel genuine to us because we don't know how to have like a good sexual experience and a good sexual like connection and so that's why I think it feels bad and it feels weird to watch and I think it's also just because Gen Z is like we're way more online it's like less in person maybe like dating apps or you first see the exterior and then you have to like connect in person but I also just think it's like people are their their brains aren't fully developed you know yeah let's have a 25 plus show yeah I think of me at 22 and oh yikes on a bike right and also it's like if I was in this show and producers was like okay now make out with everyone like I'm gonna do that but it's like I'm 21 years old like give me some more time to think about how I want to show up in this world because they do i mean everyone's watching they're gonna have a lot of influence and like it does impact young people and how they see dating like i'm sure men are watching this hearing casey go

11:23they don't deserve me like these girls are high school girls but i deserve college girls and they're like what does that mean but i need to know that and then they're gonna see they're gonna about dancing and see a girl and just like grab her and kiss her and we don't want that you're watching like your peers and so it's almost like you're seeing like how would my friends respond and i would hope that people would watch the show and be like okay love island is a show and these people are on a on a reality show and maybe this is not how i should act but you never know and I think having especially the show lack like official and like verbal consent especially when it comes to all the sexual things happening like is a little bit jarring a little scary for our future I mean it's like they're doing lap dances and grabbing butts which I keep saying but it's like there's no like can I touch you it's just like boom and it's sure maybe the show, but like we need to realize that that is not how the world actually works.

12:24And I think because we're so invested in, because we feel so parasocial, this feels like an extension of our world, but there needs to be very clear boundaries between what is TV, what is entertainment and what is like real life and real dating.

12:48Brooke Lemantia, you can read more of her work at The Cut. Coming up, what can a show where people hang out in bikinis on an island all day teach us about modern dating?

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16:09I got a text. Oh, it's just. Today Explained, we're back with Taryn Finley. She's a culture writer who covers the intersection of identity, politics, and entertainment. I asked her what the young cast of this season of Love Island can tell us about the current state of dating and relationships. There is a very well-known stat at this time that, you know, Gen Z is having less sex than previous generations. And, you know, we can tell, but we can also tell, you know, that, you know, they value and go about dating in very different ways. By the way, we are hearing these Islanders talk to one another.

16:51I mean, not to, you know, kind of like dive right in there, but also to dive right in there. There's been a lot of discussion about, you know, the influence of the manosphere and red pill, you know, discourse affecting this season and how that has like been so prevalent in what some of not only the guys say, but also what some of the girls say, you know. Yeah. How have we seen sort of that manosphere, red pill, pink pill stuff crop up this season? Oh, girl. Like, how much time do you have? Like, because I think what we where we saw it kind of at its height was Casa Amor. For those who aren't aware, Casa Amor is kind of like the ultimate test for these islanders to go off and be introduced to new bombshells and test their connections with their original partners.

17:57and within Casa Amor, I think it became very blatant for a lot of people because we're hearing conversations, especially between Casey and Corbin, who are, you know, among the two youngest in the villa of the guys, you know, talking about, like... I don't want to be mean, but I feel like T.T. and Parmita are, like, college girls. Yeah. And those girls in the villa are, like, high school girls. and really demeaning and degrading the connections that they had. Casa Amor is just, I don't know, the vibe is different. These Casa women, 10 out of 10. You don't have to disrespect and degrade your partners in order to make a new connection.

18:48You don't have to say like, okay, well, you're not giving me kisses. I'm going to get kisses from these other women. and doing it in a very, not only entitled, but also kind of like weaponizing intimacy way. No more begging all night. I'm not going to be begging all night for no cancer, bruh. And then again, like I said, you know, the women aren't, you know, they aren't innocent in this. You know, we hear, especially early on in the season, talk of like, okay, I want to be dominated. I want an alpha male. I'm like a tall guy. I like tattoos. Like who doesn't like tattoos? I need someone who's gonna call the shots.

19:26That's my type of guy. And it feels kind of like, okay, why are these 20-something-year-olds out here, like, trying to revert back to the 1950s rather than having their hot girl, hot boy summer in kind of a, you know, messy, but also, like, ethically non-monogamous way? If I got a guy that told me, I want kids, I want to get married, maybe I'll pop them out. How many do you want? I'll make a basketball team for you. If you don't like basketball, we'll do a soccer team. It's a show that is raunchy, but it's politics can actually be pretty conservative. There's this term that's been coming up over and over again this season, and it's the word...

20:10Lustful. Lustful. You're doing this all because of lust. No. Intimate or kissing. I'm not lustful. Like, being lustful is the worst thing you can possibly be. They accuse the boys of being lustful. They accuse a girl of being lustful. Like people will use it as an excuse to kick people off the island. Do you think the conservative nature of the show is something that's been intentional by producers? Or is it sort of a reflection of where we are when we think about sex and love and dating in this country right now? I think it's more of the latter. Right. And I never would have thought, especially as a former 20 something who had so many lustful years, I just never would have thought that like that would be the crime on Love Island.

21:09Right. And I think kind of going back to what we were saying earlier, Gen Z has a very different view of sex. I just think that it is a byproduct of a lot of the manosphere talk that we've seen and a lot of the like love her to death. But, you know, we hear Lotto say so many times how her body count, she can count it on, you know, on one hand. Anyway, body count so low, I might say I'm a virgin any day. And like that idea has just permeated a lot of pop culture recently where it's like, OK, like you can you can be sexy and talk about sex. But performing the act and doing it with too many people or exploring with too many people, that is the crime.

22:02So unfortunately, even though the kind of aesthetics of whole culture is alive, whole culture itself, there is an attack on. I don't even know if I can say whole culture. You can say ho. I don't think you can. You can say ho. Okay, great. Is Love Island a reflection of us as a culture or is the show influencing us? Like what direction is this going in? I think it's like a circle. I definitely think we're being influenced by Love Island and we're influencing Love Island itself. And I mean, obviously, you know, as audiences, we have a say in what's going on. We're talking about it with our friends at brunch with strangers on the train.

22:48Like we're having Love Island watch parties. Like, I definitely think what we're seeing and how we're funneling our own experiences into these conversations shows how much the show is impacting us and is causing us to think a little bit differently about how we go about dating, how we go about friendships, what we prioritize. Right. But also. The reason why we're even able to have these conversations is because Love Island has been built in a way, whether that is purposeful or not, to reflect all of that. So with all that being said, why should people even watch this show? I'm like, should you?

23:39No, you really should. You really should. I'm unfortunately addicted. I'm on the ride now. I've gotten my boyfriend on this roller coaster of a show. But I do think that a couple of things. So appointment television is back via Love Island. I think that that is important. I think that that is something that, especially in these crazy, crazy days, keeps a lot of people grounded, keeps a lot of people sane and keeps a lot of people within community. I mean, there are folks who I haven't talked to in so long, but I'll post something about Love Island and like we'll reconnect. And I think that that is probably true of a lot of people's experiences in, you know, discussing this show and interacting and engaging with this show.

24:31But I also think that there are some really good lessons to glean from the conversations that we're having on Love Island each season. We never know what we're going to get. And so being able to take a magnifying glass and look at kind of what and who is moving in society at large within this, within this dating conversation, but also within like a communal conversation and also to kind of like look internally. Right. I mean, there are certain things that I've realized about myself, like, oh, girl, I do that. And I think that in in a lot of ways, like being able to watch this show and talk about it with people and also just kind of like see these, you know, people as avatars for better or worse, like does feel like kind of cathartic and enlightening.

25:40That's Taryn Finley. She's a culture journalist who's written for The New York Times, Essence, NBC, Refinery29, and more. Today's show was produced by Dustin DeSoto, edited by Amina Alsadi, fact-checked by Gabriel Donatov, and engineered by David Tatashore. I'm John Glenn Hill, and you can usually find me hosting my own show, Explain It To Me, which drops in the Today Explained feed on Sundays.

26:11Thank you.