#2895 Below Deck S12E03: It’s a Hard Knoxx Life

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2:11Ben Mandelker: Hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we love to talk about i'm ben that's ronnie how's going ronnie well hello ben how are you i am doing just fabulously uh we are here to talk about below deck um before we do that just a reminder there's like not a lot of time left we have our final show of the mountain hysteria tour this thursday in hollywood at the fonda theater it's going to be absolutely amazing we're talking about the valley it's the show that everyone's talking about so let's talk about it together let's all be there have this big los angeles moment come join us please uh because um we wanted to send this one out with a bang so go to watch our crappens.com there's a link to the tickets there and uh we will see you on thursday be there be square um also uh patreon is going off because love island is going off right now it's so fun and we are recapping it um every day that we are recording this year podcast.

3:14Ben Mandelker: So come join us there at patreon.com slash watch what crap ends. We're having a blast and it's great to see everyone chiming in on the comments there as well as on discord and everywhere else. So that's all the news that's fit to print and also crap is on demand where you can watch us, not just listen to us. Hi, hi people on video. So let's dive into some below deck St. David. Below deck. Oh yes. Yes, the first ever five-day charter. That's a lot. They're doing it. It's a lot. That's a lot of gayness from that little guy who everything is a dick joke. Yeah. Wow. So this is a gay porn episode. We are gay and have access to internet.

4:00I knew a couple of these guys. I mean, not in real life, but I've seen their work, and it made me so excited. I was like, oh, my God. Hi.

4:09Ben Mandelker: you're like oh my god you're doing such great work i only recognized one of them actually i recognized cade what's his face but um no i didn't recognize anyone else cade maddox is the one that i really recognize because wow that guy's something else and then the other one i recognized is sky knocks who's the main one who's always like oh my god i'll tell you what we want a dick in her ass like that's the primary and i recognize him he was in one. I don't know. Listen, I know people probably don't want to come to this and hear about porn, but it's a show about porn today. So you're going to have to hear it.

4:45I saw this porn where he was in, he was like camping with his friend and they're like, Hey, our friends are supposed to show up. He's like, I know where are our friends. They have our sleeping bags. And he's like, yeah, but they're not here though. And he's like, yeah, but where are they though? Cause they have like all our food in our sleeping bags. And he's like, yeah, but our friends aren't coming. And he's like yeah but they're supposed to call me he's like yeah i know bro but what are we gonna like do about it he's like well i don't know either and he's like well it really helps me to like jerk off when i'm stressed out he's like me too we should do that but you better not get close to me i don't even want to see your penis and he's like okay and then they get in the tent he's like there's a rock on the ground i should move closer and then you know what ends up happening sky knocked his ass knocked out of the park that's what happened he got knocked that's for sure

5:33Ben Mandelker: hey i guess that's where his name comes from i do love i do love the opening skits in a in a gay porn or it really could be any porn but especially the gay porn ones because they're like they just have a certain kind of like arc to them you know like oh man here's your pizza i mean i guess that's on the straight porn too but it's always it's always something silly there's a lot of stuff like hey i'm your stepfather and my oh man you better do your homework i'm stressed because my wife has been out of town and i just get so horny when she's not here you know and then you know it just cracked me up that it's like wow our friends aren't here they're supposed to be here well might as well jerk off together and then bang each other anally guess so oh yeah god bless doing great work sky sky sky maddox is that no sky knocks sky the cade maddox cade maddox and sky skynox yeah skynox yeah well you're doing great work keep it up and then i was telling my friends because i watched this uh screener and i was telling my friends hey so this is like a gay porn episode of below deck and you know they had this guy cade maddox on he's so hot and then my friends looked up cade maddox and they're like ew that's your type gross ronnie and then they judged me all night for liking cade maddox like what the hell that guy's cute right is it in my hen yeah no he uh he's cute i mean kade kade maddox is definitely like he i think he's like he's like a really famous one because he like pops up i feel like he's i see him on instagram or everywhere like i think like he's appeared on many things i feel like he's a hard worker yeah he does a lot okay the man yeah he hustled the man is like the candy burris of um porn star He's just always working.

7:22Yes, absolutely. That's exactly correct. So this is probably the best time to announce Ben and I have both molded our penises into dildos that you can buy on WatcherCrapins.com.

7:35Ben Mandelker: Yes. Yes. That is now part of our merch set. We'll be doing a collab with Cade Maddox and Sky. Sky Rizzy. Actually, surprise. You thought I was Sky Rizzy. Sky Rizzy. Yeah. Mine is just a fupa with a tiny turtle head poking out because it's shy.

7:58Ben Mandelker: Well, we are so happy for our porn stars because they got to go on a boat and do porn star things, which mainly accounts. Basically, it's just like, yes, you're a twink, which, you know, that's like that's like the vibe. So anyway, though, before they even come on board, where we last left off. Not unattended. Yeah. so Frenchy has just come on onto the ship and he is saying I was in a position last year and I know how intense and tough it is and Fraser's like yes well we've got your back and that's all that matters and I'm going to get back to work with the girls, love you, can't wait to see what you cook and then afterwards going up to Captain Kerry and say how you're overwhelmed ta-ta we've got your back I'm just looking for the proper area to stab it in.

8:52And Anthony's like, oh, me and Frasier, it's like, he's such a part of my family, you know, but he's also maybe part of my departure. So, I don't know. It's going to be hard between Charter, between everything going on, how to talk to Frasier, but I have to find a way to talk to Frasier. Oh my God, what am I going to do? I'm going to put on my tightest jeans and more eyebrow pencil than anybody could imagine.

9:15Ben Mandelker: I don't know why it's so hard to talk to Frasier. doesn't he have a call-in show hey yo 1990s sitcom callback so fraser get it so fraser is like um he's telling everyone to work on their cabins and everything and he's telling rainbow to hang around selene because selene is a disaster and rainbow is really good and rainbow's like can i say something i'm not gonna say please i'm not gonna say thank you i'm just gonna be like do this do that and so then it's like yeah i know i know and i'll say why why and i will tell you i'm not children so anthony's like my whole life i've never been with anyone in the galley or the kitchen so it can be very challenging you know it's like drama chef chef oh big man big strong man like chef big strong man like me we'll see how it goes and it goes beautifully they get along so well I'm actually surprised that the other chef even quit after this.

10:18I know. Because Anthony like eased him into it, made him see that it's doable. The guy was doing well. He didn't have any nervous breakdowns. He only tried to proselytize to like three people and a fish. So I thought he was getting better.

10:32Ben Mandelker: I loved when he baptized Anthony in a pool of green peas. That was just so lovely. He just poured them all out in the freezer and said, just dunk yourself in there. so um meanwhile ko is um instructing the deck team to do things and he's okay all right well you know buys the leader wait hold on before i can talk about myself let's have fancy new beginning and we see all these photos come up the photos of ko as in his life and then says instagram yeah ko without a shirt ko without a shirt holding a fish ko without a shirt holding a surfboard ko without a shirt eating a sandwich it's like we get it ko without a shirt i'm following I'm in.

11:11Ben Mandelker: You know, as a bosun, I'm the leader of the group. So everything relies on me. And, you know, I work hard to achieve the position. I grew up in Rio and my first job was on a yacht. I was the chef on a 27 meter. And then they show a shot of him like standing on a table, like squatting on a table, like he's about to poop on it barefoot. I'm like, okay. Very intrigued. Like, wait, you were a chef, huh? And so it talks about basically his friends still live in Rio and they're like engineers and lawyers and doctors. But he's going around the globe, which is not that common for someone who grew up in Rio.

11:44I guess. Yeah. He was like, in Rio, we don't do this. I was like, really?

11:49Ben Mandelker: Did you not see the last season of Blow Duck Down Under? There was literally a Brazilian girl on there. Yeah. I've never heard that Rio is like, you better stay home and become a doctor. I was like, I'm the first person to leave Brazil. Yeah. so rainbow's like hey babe of solene the bed doesn't need to be ironed if you febreze it and you pull it and she's like oh my god why didn't you tell me that because she tell me iron you tell me don't iron you say look at my eye she tell me don't look at anything listen to me okay listen work smarter not harder okay yeah we just work smarter and everything gets done faster smarter or not harder okay because no your opinion do you need to iron this sheet no maybe i don't know what's the sheet okay i don't know why we need sheet why don't we just make it on the ground you have to care about this bed whatever you're doing this bad care about it okay eggs on me that's what i like okay well okay you know what it's done now let's just move on to the next step okay just finish the bed i can't okay i'm not gonna do it okay good job you do it goodbye All right.

12:54Sorry. I was like, Oh God, this conversation is a waste of my time. So he's like, whatever. Like spring Windex on the bed.

13:02Ben Mandelker: God bless her. So Landis like totally impervious to hearing what other people are saying. It's kind of amazing because they will act, they're actually getting like annoyed with her and she's like, okay, fine. That's fine. Do what you want to do. I don't care. She's like, whatever. So now it's 5 0 4 PM, 19 hours until charter. So now it's 6.45. Guess what? Nothing happened. Okay, so now dinner for the crew is ready, and Fraser is radioing people to let them know. And so Anthony is talking to Solaine, and he's like, oh, what is going on? I hear French over here. She's like, oh, I'm fine. How are you?

13:38In French. That was in French. And he's like, Anthony's like, oh, guys, can we have English? Some English guys. Okay, okay, English, English guys. So Rainbow apologized for yelling at Solaine, And she goes, oh, yes, it was very bad with me today. How you yell, yell, yell. Too bad I cannot eat yelling. Otherwise, I would have dinner already.

13:58Ben Mandelker: You know, I have four days experience making bed. It's not perfect, but it's okay. Okay, it's not four days of experience of learning how to do the trapeze. It's making a bed. Like, I think it should be like by hour four, you should pretty much have it down. And Rainbow's like, yeah, but a two-minute conversation about whether or not to iron sheets is way too much for me. okay like I can't it's like well you know I just think I better with a work ethic you know I was more than willing to learn I will iron well if you want me to iron well do it but you know these things take that take a time so yeah do it soft please easy so then Barbara's like today Solène made a really nice bed everyone I was really proud of her she made a nice bed so thank you so much but she took two hours but it was nice two hours but it was a nice bed Carrie's like, oh, we're laughing today but we'll be laughing so much tomorrow, aren't you?

14:51So now Carrie and Fraser are going to go over prep sheets. So Fraser announces it's a five-day charter it's going to be a long one and Celine's like, oh, they are a porn star they're a porn star

15:03Ben Mandelker: oh my god All of them Our primary's name is Sky Knox he's from Toronto it's like, oh my god, Toronto Oh, Barbara's like, Jesus Christ, too much testosterone. This preference sheet is literally the only thing that Sky Knox has ever topped. Sky Knox asked if he could submit a preference skeet instead of a preference sheet, and I said, absolutely not. And Barbara's like, oh, Jesus Christ, too much testosterone. Well, right, night one should be Parisian cabaret, lube in every room. Like, oh, no. Just like any Parisian cabaret. And then Rainbow's like, oh God, we're going to have so much penis on our face for the next five days.

15:49Ben Mandelker: Yes. Okay. Marcel has a shellfish allergy, but a penchant for dick. Okay. Very important. Everyone needs to know this. He's got a fish allergy and it's not figurative. So please, let's watch out for the shells. No clams in all senses of the word. so Fraser's like oh my god we've got eight gay male porn stars god I just swallowed that wasn't intentional I'm terrified we're going to be stretched we're going to be pulled we're going to be flipped we're going to be fucked but not in a good way alright guys this is going to be a fucking hard charter so we're going to be going to three islands we'll head over to Anguilla and at night time they're going to be going off in kayaks on an adventure a gay adventure and then he says the next child is going to be a doozy it's a five-day charter we're going to do three islands four countries lots of gay sex on each of these islands have their own unique experiences anal tea bagging everything in between slings swings stings and each evening we're having an epic theme parties that we've never done before so this cruise is going to get spent yeah so he's they want to go to a nudist beach i just look i mean i know that you do porn but like is that all is that all you eat breathe and what am i trying to think it's like that's all it's like that's all they talk about so everything's a dick joke everything has to do is to i don't know it's like too much of your work life taken home you know what i mean i thought porn stars went home and were just like playing Dungeons and Dragons or like reading or something.

17:28Like I didn't understand it was like all dick all the time.

17:32Ben Mandelker: Yeah. But you know what? They got OnlyFans accounts to promote probably. So, hey, like you're on camera. So like promote, promote, promote. But I thought the same thing too. I was like, geez, I kind of, I sort of expected they were going to come on board and just be like, oh God, let's play chess. We'll play Uno or something. I felt like they'd be exhausted you know from having to go to yeah I don't just walk around talking about housewives all day you know like I go to TJ Maxx or Home Goods or I play piano or play video games or something like that or look at their porn you know I thought they would secretly all be tame gays like they were all going to come on board and be like hey does the chef mind if we all take over the kitchen and cook some barefoot contestant recipes right like I thought they were going to sit down and be like guys does anybody know why parade isn't really selling in la buddy there's so many tickets left if if you had to choose between jesse mueller and um the lady from the band's visit who would you choose um but no they came on and they were like oh my god you're a twink just so you know you're a twink yeah uh so they come um lawrence and anthony are getting together to plan their meal because the chefs are working together for this charter so lawrence is like let's start from the top we're starting off with oysters oysters would be nice oysters a little champagne foam probably like a little tiny uh nickel sized uh wafer that we could feed to people before we had them drink that down with wine and apologize to the lord for everything that they've done oh that is perfect uh it's like also beef filet pure pure green beans you know it's not so hard and anthony's like he is very organized and he knows exactly what he's talking about and most of the time i have no goddamn idea what i'm doing i am the tornado it's like oh great well i'm so glad you got this job yeah and lawrence is like i'm an anti-tornado and you're a tornado, bro.

19:38You're not really an anti-tornado, sir. You're calm today, but you were, the tears were a fluttering and a funneling yesterday.

19:47Ben Mandelker: Yeah, you were the storm clouds. You were the storm clouds. So Kyle and Barbara are looking at Kyle's like, here we go, Skynox gay porn videos. Let's take a look-see. So they look and Barbara's like, oh my God, click, click, click, click, let's see. So they look and they're cracking up and Kyle's like, wow, gay porn is a lot more dramatic than straight porn. It was crazy. I would love it if like Sky Knox is just doing like Macbeth porn. Black and white Macbeth porn. To be in my ass or not to be in my ass. And Barbara's like, oh my God, so much drama, you know. And then we see Sky Knox going, I can get any guy to spell his secret.

20:33Ben Mandelker: It's a lot of drama. Kyle's right. It's a very dramatic movement. um so then anthony is like by the way laurence never date us two you cannot trust us two they lie and honestly i have my cat bro i'm a dad i have my cat i'm a cat dad and it turns out he has a cat named mr tunes was so cute there's a picture of like this cat be like oh my god get me out of here um austin by the way austin kroll just got two kittens and i'm so mad about it because i'm like you don't don't do that don't do the kitten thing austin don't make me have to say nice things like i already had a tough time last season saying nice things about austin and now like he's gonna have kittens and i love kittens and cats so i'm like really upset about that's why they do it when a reality star gets a gets a pet you know that they're doing it to get some likes yeah unless you're just like i have a cat but i'm keeping her off camera she's building a whole industry based off her cat she's building pajamas based off of her cat Craig was building an industry.

21:34I forgot. No, she came out with Daphne pajamas. Did she? Oh, she did? Yeah, that's what her pajamas line is named. Daphne.

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24:35So Anthony is like, oh, my God, sometimes deserve better than human beings. Sometimes, you know, some people are so terrible to get you fired from bots. I was like, he did? He did. But he also got you rehired. So that's something. He's not a completely terrible person.

24:52Ben Mandelker: Yeah, that's true. See? Look at me. He's taking a freezer. You see? So Kyle and Solane are smoking on the deck. And Kyle's like, what's this? Just a thing? Or is there a storybook there? Look at that smirk. Your ex-boyfriend? What are you talking about over there? And she's like, more than two years that I have one boyfriend. So I don't know, but I have memory. You know, I'm not sleeping with you because I have memory of your boyfriend. Now everybody, listen to my story about my bracelet that will disgust everyone who watches this show. Prepare. Prepare to be disgust. This was triggering. because she's like, this priest is from my ex-boyfriend Dylan.

25:31Ben Mandelker: So you're like, okay, Dylan, whoever, who cares. Flashback to Dylan. I was like, oh, no, no, no. No, it was the worst. The clip they showed of him was him washing off cold cuts. Ew. He's like, yeah, you got to watch your cold cuts off in the scene because I used to be fat one time. So I'm not going to have sulfides. Thank God I'm not fat anymore. Ew, fat people, disgusting. in why am i afraid that they're setting up the fact that dylan will be coming back like that is too weird like that's oh man like guys look at this i i'm really actually quite good i'm like a ladies man i work out a lot look at my cold cuts i'm like oh god he was just terrible and then he showed up on vanderpump rules for no reason oh yeah he's gross so she's like but i still love him and i was so sad so now that's why i like i try to keep everything like that no risk since dylan i've never been in love again oh god dylan ruined you he washes cold god selene come on that is kind of a love island choice though a guy like dylan right like hey i really want to get to know you so like what's your calorie count per day like he was so bad in so many different ways yeah i don't remember too many specifics about him except the fact that um he drove me nuts every time i remember he used to be fat and so now he's obsessed with weight and calories and that's all he talks about and working out that's correct that's correct but he has like little blown up lips and like he looks crazy i don't know yeah bad bad move bad bad um so um so now Fraser is like, all right, let's put the lube out, please.

27:16Ben Mandelker: But like, don't put, don't like put it in a high-profile place. I don't want to promote sex because then we have to change the sheets. So, um, they're basically going to like hide the lube. It'll be there, but it'll be like tucked away. And she's like, Barbara's like, well, let's just say that we are Catholic. So then Anthony is Catholic. That's so cute. Let's say we're Catholic. So Anthony's like, oh, nice menu. Nice menu. You want to take care of Salman Tata? So Anthony is like, you know, it's not for everyone to get second chance. And you know, you remember what happened last season, so I cannot make any mistake.

27:54Fire twice? Oh, I might as well not go back to France and live in a cave for the rest of my life. It would be so embarrassing.

28:03Ben Mandelker: And so now they're like talking about the menu and everything. Meanwhile, there's rain coming in. There's wind that's picking up. It's getting kind of stormy. and Fraser's checking with Barbara about like the uniforms downstairs and Carrie's doing a walkthrough. They're all prepping for everything to happen. Meaning the charter. The charter start, I should say. So we go back to the kitchen and Anthony's like, oh, fast food is like making love. It's something like this is very water. No, especially with so much cream. I don't want to hear that. You know, like love sex, love food. Don't want to eat your cream.

28:43You know, keep it to yourself.

28:46Ben Mandelker: Lawrence is like, I mean, I've never looked at a plate of French food and thought, yeah, that's like sex and making love. But I have looked at a plate of food and thought I have sinned and I'm going to hell. I guess we all just read things into the food we make. I can't get married before I eat every plate of food. There's too many things. I have looked at this food and thought, is this food going to survive the rapture? It's coming soon, you know. I think it might be happening during this charter. Oh, my God. My dad was on me about the rapture yesterday. Yesterday. Whenever that was. So two days ago.

29:20Yeah, he was on me about the rapture because he's been, instead of going to church, he goes to like one of those mega church things where they have a cool band. But they got so big that they started building multiple churches. I mean, they're humongous. These churches are like concert stadiums, like complete with like the rocking leather movie chairs and shit. And so it got so busy that they started broadcasting church from one church into the other church. So you would go to the church and you're watching on this giant movie screen. Right. So he was like, well, fuck that. I'll just watch. I'm sure he didn't say fuck that, you know, because he's holy.

29:57But he was like, I'll just start watching this at home. So my parents started inviting friends to their house now for church day and just getting shit faced while they watch work. Like they sit and have cocktails while they're watching church. And now they have this big thing going on at church about revelations. And it's about the book of revelations. And so my dad's like, you know, everything going on in the world right now, it's all a revelations. You want to talk about it? I'm like, not really. I sure don't. Are you drunk? He's like, yeah, I just got done with church. I was like, oh, my God, you fucking people.

30:28he's like of course i'm of course i've been drinking we've been at church at home what do you think we're doing we're talking about revelations getting shit-faced buddy are you in are you out meanwhile like my conversation my parents is like how do i connect the bluetooth

30:46Ben Mandelker: to the our our old 2010 car that we refuse to update oh i get that one too another software update. Oh, gosh. Like, basically revelations. I mean, for... Talk about a revelation. Bluetooth, am I right? All right. So, Carrie is like, Fraser, Fraser, Carrie here. Go ahead, Cap. I'm without a uniform, mate. I'm not amused. Guess what? This isn't an adventure. Oh, uniform drama for the captain. It's a new storyline premiered, launched by Below Deck Med and now I guess it's part of the canon, which is the captain doesn't have a uniform. Anybody seen my black culottes? No? Okay, I'll just be sitting here waiting.

31:35I'm not going out on that deck unless I look like I could be dancing, partying, and shopping at Target all at the same time. So someone fix this.

31:45Ben Mandelker: The spirit of Brie haunts this boat. I don't think I know what the culottes are. Little pins. Little pins for the belt. Little pins for the pants. So, um, so Fraser lives like on top of it. He's like, he goes and he's like, I need this. You can fuck up anything, but not that. Okay. If even a plug is two degrees off center, it's on me. So I guess I just need to continue not relying on anyone and telling everyone everything. And of course, the episode with the gay porn stars, the episode where I talk about plugs, my bad. Although if there's an episode to miss your pants, it's this one. Yeah. So he takes his pants and he's like, sorry, I apologise.

32:28You know, we're ironing out this season, no pun. And I promise that's what we'll do. You know, listen, I'm not happy about it. I'm super pissed. If I had eyebrows, they would be raised right now.

32:40Ben Mandelker: So I'm sensing there's going to be a lot of action on board this trip. And I'm hoping, I hope requesting lube in every room is a bit of a joke. I'm quite happy that I'm not in housekeeping. I just hope they don't use it all. Like, guess what? They're going to use it all. Then the guests come and they're like, yeah, it's a boat built up dick. Yeah. I'm going to fuck that boat. I'm sticking that foot up my ass. Oh my God. Not me first. Threesome. Threesome with the boat. I love it. They're all so funny. Cause they're all like very sweet too. And then, so it's like leading them through, leading all the porn stars to the boat.

33:16Ben Mandelker: They're like, yes. And they get to that, the primary bedroom where it has that skylight that opens up and Fraser's like, now look at this and it opens up. They all go, yes! Like an anus. I want to fuck the skylight. Yes, queen. Yeah, this is where we're going to have our orgy. Kidding, not kidding. Kidding, not kidding.

33:41So now we get some bridge drama. Dun, dun, dun. Are we all going to die? It's a tricky bridge. And one of the guys was like, oh my God, you guys look at this bridge. We're going under the bridge. Is that sexual? No, it's not sexual. Do I need to brush my teeth? No. Do I need to wash my ass? What does that mean? It's a literal bridge, you fucking morons.

34:02Ben Mandelker: I love the porn star's fascination with the bridge. That one guy was like, you guys, look, look at this bridge. And the other one goes, this wind is fierce. They're just like AI. they're like hey AI could you give us some gay dialogue to describe the bridge and some wind this is the tightest opening I've had for a long time go bridge yes so Kerry's like the wind is kicking up and we have rain and I can crash into this bridge at any time imagine going over railroad crossing and it's icy I mean we all might die right now we've seen boats sink before and this one's about to go down we're all going to say final farewells because we're all going to die oh no made it through made it through.

34:43Ben Mandelker: Just a boat going through a passage. We did it! We fucked the bridge! So they go to the table, and one of the guys is like, oh my god, we've got a cock ring napkin holder. That's amazing. Someone else is like, yeah, we should give lessons because people don't know that cock rings actually go over the balls. And then he's like, I mean, of course it goes over the balls. I mean, people put it over just the cock? I mean, what is this? An unfierce bridge? Disgusting. so um now the water toys are being put out and kyle's starving and domo's so hungry he's about to pass out and jess is like someone needs to go on break like what the hell so people are getting frustrated because you know ko's not really doing breaks for anybody like uh guys you need to have breaks here okay and don't forget jess used to be a bosun and she's taken she's taking like a demotion basically to be on this show so she sort of knows she's like um you're supposed to have a schedule so now it's time for the first meal so they've got cooked de bouffe grilled asparagus courgettes tomatoes shrimp quinoa salmon salad tomato burrata salad and here is a um little box that you can put your dreams of bottoming tonight because probably won't be happening after this meal.

36:04This was actually very healthy, this whole meal. I thought. I was like, wow, that's how you maintain bodies like that, I guess. Eat some quinoa and some asparagus.

36:12Ben Mandelker: Well, they had also like a giant pile of egg whites for breakfast the next day. I was like, man, sometimes like that where I'm like, I'm always like, I want to have a great body. I want to have abs. I want to have pecs. Then I see like that pile of egg whites and I'm like, I don't know if I can make the sacrifices that it entails. sometimes like a muffin tops okay you know i think i want to have a nice breakfast especially if i can eat a muffin top okay like okay i'll keep my jiggly so um they you know but it is nice to see people with bodies like that actually working for it because a lot of times i feel like on these shows we see really hot people and then they order like cake upon cake upon cake and they're fine you know so i like that these guys are like guess what we eat nothing in general we're really going overboard with this like steamed salmon it's crazy they're professionals so then Damo's asking Jess if she would ever make a porno and she's like oh absolutely and he's like have you she's like absolutely so there's a sex tape out there she's like somewhere he's like wow and then Barbara's asking Skye about how long he's been together with Tony and Skye's like oh yeah he's my porn boyfriend but he has a wife.

37:21Ben Mandelker: He's like, I'm married. Yeah, he's married to a woman. Yeah, so this is my man. So they basically have this like true work husband relationship going on. Yeah. And he's like, yeah, it's called a modern day relationship. Get over it, okay? And Barbara's like, oh my God, I have no words. No words. I'm Catholic.

37:45Ben Mandelker: So she's like, so he's just your boyfriend when you're in a scene. so when you're like filming he's like insane a boyfriend insane did you say insane she said she has an accent she's like no i'm just asking because i'm wondering did you ever do a porno where you had to make a bed and if so do you think you could fill in downstairs for selene i'm pretty sure she's taking her foot in the sink at the moment so um now the crew is some of the crew's having lunch and carrie's like wow seems like a good group of people hey he's like really lovely you can you just really can't judge a book by its whole cover can you so then um then there and lawrence and anthony are in the kitchen and there's a box of linguine pasta and anthony like lawrence is like upset by it he's like who ordered this and he's like i don't know i don't know what to do with it so they're gonna lawrence announces that he's there's gonna i'm sorry anthony announces that there's gonna be like a penis mac and cheese that will be made with the linguine.

38:46Ben Mandelker: So, yeah. So Jess and K.O. are still talking. So she's like, so babe, we need to send people on breaks for lunch. Like, you can't just not starve people. He's like, oh, okay. Go have lunch then. Okay. Like, I mean, do it. But it's like five and nobody's eaten. He's like, oh, no, we all had lunch. You didn't have lunch? He's like, no, did not have lunch. So. Yeah, you got to give us breaks, bro. So Barbara's down in the laundry getting it organized and everything and KO is like talking to Deimos saying it's just more like stuff he's like okay now you go you got a lunch okay when she comes back you go to lunch but actually only walk halfway to lunch and then come back and then I'll send someone to lunch and then you walk the rest of the halfway back and then you have only half of your lunch then you come back and then I'll have half of my lunch and then you go and have a quarter of your lunch and then we all sit down together and by that time it'll be dinner and it'll all make sense right and they're like um yeah and so jess is like wow so you know growing up i was really shy so my mom threw me into waitressing so i'd get out of my shell and that's she also just probably wanted you to get shit for her which yeah right there so they do something with your life and get me a water if my mom rainbow sent me to bartending class at five she would have

40:11Ben Mandelker: so rainbow is like oh i was so out there and so my two older sisters kind of like beat me to a pulp and then beat it out of me fighting was just part of the culture you know just part of that dutch culture dutch fighting you know dutch fight club every child goes through it and there was a point when i was like 13 and my sister was 14 and we just weren't getting along at all so my dad took us on a boat to an island in the middle of a lake in holland he just dropped us off and was like okay you've got 10 minutes to fight it out so that's it how crazy was that story i was like what the fuck and jess just goes no shit she goes yeah he's like this shit's gonna stop so there we were on an island just beating the fuck out of each other you know i lost a couple of teeth but that bitch lost a nose and that's just how i deal with it fighting like wow you're gonna you're gonna work out great here but then later in the episode we see her just like

41:03Ben Mandelker: this is why you can't have your parents read the hunger games while they're still rearing children they're like hey that's a great idea we play the hunger games literally every day it's how we look like this so um rainbow's like yeah we just fought a lot you know and because we grew up not talking about our feelings they just get bottled up and you know you explode and that's why i'm gonna beat the shit out of Selene with an iron. Yeah. So then Lawrence is cleaning the galley and Anthony loves this because he's like, oh my God, this is so wonderful. I can actually cook and someone cleans up my mess for me.

41:41Ben Mandelker: So they're having like, they have like a funny kind of vibe together. It's kind of sad that they have to break up because I do sort of enjoy them. And now it's time to get ready for dinner and Rainbow setting the table and Selene just falls down the stairs and it's not like she just stumbles she just like we just see a static camera of like the hallway and her body just comes flying out the farewell and just like slams onto the floor she's like oh i'm okay i'm okay i'm like wow nothing affects this woman yeah she really she really just bounces back literally so then um fraser sees carrie and carrie's just in this towel He's like, Fraser, what's wrong with this picture?

42:20I've got a boner at work. I'm not really sure. I don't have any clothes. Understood. Am I supposed to be listening to you? Would you prefer me on my knees at this point? Fraser? Need my goddamn uniform.

42:33Ben Mandelker: I thought this was the gay porn charter, though. You can't do a gay porn scene and then not follow through, Captain Kerry. I'm terribly sorry. We've got too many professionals on board to ignore this moment. It's the third time today. How many times do you get your clothes washed in the day? I didn't know captains had like three different uniforms a day. That's nuts. I know. Well, I guess because he has the whites. Just regular. Well, he has the whites. And then during the day, he's got like that blue polo shirt or something. Don't they have like a blue polo shirt? And then at night, the blacks.

43:05So, yeah. Well, there you go. Never noticed. Look at that. 20 ,000 seasons later of recapping, I'm just noticing. Wow. Commercials, here comes one right now. He lurks in shadow. He slips into dreams. He casts no reflection.

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46:25So Fraser's like, girls, I'm going to say this one last time so you can completely keep messing it up and I can keep not checking that you're doing it correctly. The captain just came to me naked in his towel. Do I still have a boner? I do. He hasn't got his uniform. My boner is still happening. Please get a uniform on the captain so my boner can go down. That would be lovely. Thank you.

46:50Ben Mandelker: So Rambo's like, if our team is fucking up and fucking up and fucking up, that's not on me. I'm doing my job properly. It's just such a shit show. It's just, I'm like, that's maybe not the best attitude. It's like, I have to help out to make sure that like the people who don't know what they're doing can be better. But she's like, whatever, I'm doing my job. I was the one who survived the island in Holland. They didn't. Okay. I'm not putting it. There's no rainbow in team.

47:15Ben Mandelker: So then Fraser asked Barbara and she's like, oh, Fraser, I can't think of everything. Okay. Like, I know, like I'm now I'm pissed because I'm pissed because I'm not responsible for it. Like, I can't do everything. everyone has this attitude literally everyone on this on the interior has an attitude of like well i did my stuff i'm not responsible for something else so i don't know actually that was i think she said that was her responsibility but she's still pissed she's like i'm responsible for it but i'm still mad so it's like okay where we live we learn you know like no i'm being pulled in so many directions doing things all the time you know i'm never finishing anything it all followed me Oh, my God.

47:54I feel like a bad crew member. This sucks. Rainbow, go hit. Go hit, uh, Sir Lane.

48:02Ben Mandelker: I'm putting you both on the bow and just pretend it's an island and now fight. Great. So, Fraser brings the stuff to carry and he's like, well, I've spoken with him again. It's the third time. And he's like, well, it's the third time it happened today. And he's, she's like, I know, I know. So, for fuck's sake, oh, it's not an adventure. Didn't this happen with Captain Lee also? Yeah. It's actually not the first time this has happened with. Yeah. Yeah. So Captain Carrie looks so mad though. And his eyes get like really satanic when he's mad. Yeah. They get like really, they get really scary. I don't want to, I don't want to make him mad.

48:39I kind of do. Don't make him mad. Cause he's hot. Also mad in a towel.

48:45Ben Mandelker: Oh, something about a gay porn star charter. It really gets the juices flowing on this episode. I guess. He's hot though. Captain Carrie. A little old man with angry eyes and a towel. Zaddy. So Fraser, now they are going to do their Parisian cabaret theme. And Fraser's talking about what that is. He's like, it's flamboyant. It's big. It's feathers. It's extravagant. It's fun. It's flirtatious. It's a bit wily. It's absolutely disgusting. So now everyone takes a step in everything. They are disgusting. I went to one in Montreal. I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, then. Okay. Anybody take a tap class?

49:22could we start there to get your penis out of my face i'm from america i'm not used to people

49:27Ben Mandelker: slapping me in the face with their penis well but i'll never forget my time at swinging richards in atlanta where oh that's true i tipped the stripper and he literally whacked me on the face with his dick i was like oh okay that was so funny but at least it wasn't cabaret themed It was not Parisian cabaret themed There were no feathers Those poor guys at Swinging Dicks were just in Dirty trailer t-shirts Those poor guys They needed the money That could have taken place Under a freeway and it would have been the same thing That's a fun night That was so fun R.I.P. Swinging Dicks Swinging Richards So now it's dinner time and the guests are seating And Fraser is like Welcome to Paris aboard Motor Yacht St.

50:20David. We're so excited to have this wonderful evening for you. Yeah.

50:26Ben Mandelker: Can you see? I was being sarcastic. So then Kyle is in a cabaret outfit. And so, and they're all excited by it. And then he's, Kyle's like, he brings Sky a flower. And Sky's like, oh my God, who designed your outfit? He was like, this is right here. Check this out. and he like lifts up, he lifts up his skirt and he like shows he's like in the thong and everything. So they'd love it because Kyle loves flirting with the gays. So this is like his perfect charter. Yeah. Kyle loves some nakedity. I wonder if he's going to just get naked and someone has sex with one of the guests this season. Do you think it's this charter?

51:02Ben Mandelker: They say it's Kyle. Wow. The guys. Oh, that'd be amazing. I hope it, I hope it is. That's, that's really hot. I mean, five days and these guys are horny as hell. They are horny and they don't, they are, these are definitely like a hole as a hole kind of situation with Damo and Kyle. So, you know, they're down for it. So, Barbara, let's see. So, Fraser serves Wagyu, ribeye, with mashed potatoes, green beans, and carrots. And he says that carrots have an erection, but they're just carrots. I'm not really sure. Yeah, carrots are normally pretty erect. And then, Carrie's like, so, how is everything tonight?

51:41Ben Mandelker: And Skye's like, it supersedes lunch, which was exceptional. We especially like the window cleaner, which, of course, is Kyle. It's like, well, we've got two amazing chefs right down there, which is not standard. So just know that going forward, your food will be shitty. There you go. So Fraser talks to Barbara. She's like, oh, my God, Celine was so nice today. And he's like, oh, I'm going to go tell her. Celine, Barbara said you're amazing. She's like, oh, I know. I see in your eyes that you are proud of me. It is so cute. Get ready for that face to change soon. But right now it's fun to watch.

52:14Ben Mandelker: so now dessert it's a red wine poached pear and uh now it's like talent show stuff so tony starts twerking marcel shoves his hand in his mouth which is maybe like how like a great great skill set to have as was mentioned on the show that was horrifying and is he the one that um is married no tony is the one who's married tony is the married one marcel marcel i don't think is married to a woman oh right tony twerks right marcel shoves his hand yeah okay tony's like in kind of like a like a fish net like like bustier i don't know or like i don't know how he's like in fishnet lingerie and he's twerking he's you know doing the whole thing watching someone put their fist in their mouth is is something um so uh damo is talking to jess that KO and she's like oh yeah you know like look there's a bit of a standard that we're not really setting here you know I mean I can't be going to him saying I need to eat food but I'll speak to him and if it doesn't change then I'm going to have to speak to Captain Kerry in a towel I know and then pictures of Jess and then the words Jess I worked on private vessel you know we never had to break for almost 200 days and it was rough and I was so tired and at the end of the season I hurt myself I fell down the stairs on my back and it really took me out and I couldn't work but I got to take so that's why I have to take breaks not as good as rainbows I had to fight with my sister to the death on an island in a lake in Holland but you know it's okay so rainbows like okay so Selene with things like this instead of leaving it out just put it away because that saves you an entire step okay oh no I hear you I promise but I'm trying to do it fast, you know?

54:07So if I was faster, then I'd try to do it, you know? Like, if I could be faster, I would go faster. But here I am going fast. And you say, faster? What am I supposed to do? Okay, just clean the silverware.

54:18Ben Mandelker: Just clean the silverware. Make it look nice. Make it look nice. Okay, does that sound good? Can you just clean it? So remember how you cleaned your foot in the sink before while you ate a croissant? Okay, do that foot with the silverware. Can you do that? Yeah, did we talk about that when she was eating a croissant in the sink with her feet in the sink? I don't know if that's about to come or if it did come, but like in case we missed it, that was amazing. Watching her feet in the kitchen sink, nasty, eating a croissant. That's so good. So Rainbow's like, listen, this is a lot of work, no? And she's like, so Lane is on me and I'm on late.

54:59Even though like nothing. Oh, no, that's Rainbow. She's like, yeah, look, even though eating everything on her list is done, I have to send her to bed now. And she's not even done doing shit. And now she's got to be up in the morning. So that's my fault. So I'm just so exhausted. And it's dark. And it's a long five-day charter tunnel. And there's no light at the end of it.

55:19Ben Mandelker: And then we get the most beautiful scene, which is Rainbow at 2 in the morning vacuuming the living room and, like, cry hyperventilated.

55:38just while she's pushing the vacuum is so funny she's just standing in the same place pushing the vacuum like that is the second breakdown we've had in three episodes i mean just the casting on

55:52Ben Mandelker: this season it's great so good and i mean really you know it is pride month so we have this specially timed super gay charter you know i'm assuming for gay pride but honestly i think the real gift for gay pride was this moment because this was this was gay camp right here for vacuuming and sobbing at the same time i was like this is the sort of thing that like you know you know goes in the gay canon.

56:21So then Damo's there because he's also on nights and he's like, do you need any more help? And she's like, no, just finished. I'm just telling everyone I went to bed at 2.15 so I can wake up and help with turnips. That's me. Rainbow. Fight club rainbow. Working her ass up before her sister tries to knock her nose off again.

56:38Ben Mandelker: He's like, we have turnips on board? I don't really eat those. She's like, no. It's a bad thing. Okay, I'm going to go sleep. So she's like yeah i'm just the type of person where i just like to brush things under the rug and i hope they go away and i'm not gonna sit there and be like oh by the way i just had a panic attack because that's not how you survive on fight island so i definitely need to find better coping mechanisms for my feelings uh but for now they just get pushed deep deep down and i'm sure it'll be fine i'm sure everything will be fine meanwhile close up of the vacuum it's all mingled and bent and twisted.

57:13So they go to bed at three in the morning, which is fucking crazy. So like Selena is so funny, but oh my God, I would hate working with her. I would die if I had to work with her,

57:22Ben Mandelker: but she's hilarious to watch nightmare. So it's six 30 AM and everyone's waking up, which is really early for, I would imagine for a bunch of porn stars. And Tony has an announcement, which is guys, I never had someone do this, but he literally peed in my hole last night.

57:41Ben Mandelker: Like, that's water sports. I, you know, some things, I'm sorry. Just, first of all, keep it inside. And then where was he peeing in your hole? In the bed? Was it in the bed? Was it in the shower? Where do you do something like that? Why do you do something like that? You've had too much sex if you need to pee in somebody's hole. It's too much, okay? I know we're not supposed to kink shame, but enough. Like, come on. So then they're cooking in the kitchen, in the galley. And Anthony's like, I'm going to kiss Lawrence because he's like real chef. And he's real OG. He did his part. I did my part.

58:21Ben Mandelker: I was very calm, very smooth in the galley. And Lawrence is like, I'll definitely miss his smile. Like, how can you not miss that guy? Good luck, mate. I've got a Rapture scheduled in about five minutes. So I'll see you sometime, perhaps. USS Rapture coming to get me any moment now. One horse man was the French toast. We'll see where it goes from here. I know you love his smile, and I think that's so sweet, but in one week it's going to turn two tears. And I can't wait. I'm so excited for the real return of Anthony. I cannot take it. Yeah. Now it's time to lift the anchor, lift the anchor. And Barbara and Cade are talking about, so Barbara's like, so what about your family?

59:04do they support you in your job? And he's like, yeah, you know, like at first my mom was like super scared, but now she's like one of my number one fans.

59:13Ben Mandelker: Barbara's like, aw, when I told my mom that I was gay, you know what, that I'm gay? She wasn't mad or anything. She was worried, which I love Barbara. She's like, well, let me talk about my situation instead. He's like, yeah, my mom felt the same way when I first sat on the traffic cone, but you know what? now she just goes around town and just leaves stickers up Cade Maddox OnlyFans and like really he's done a great job of signing the Cade Army you know on the back of her suburban it says my my son swallows and I've never just been more grateful for a mother so Barbara talks about her coming out and around 15 she had a girlfriend she loved being who she is and And a lot of it is because of her mom.

1:00:00Ben Mandelker: And she says, you know, I think you just have to be who you are. And she was the first one to support me. And she'll be the one like, you know, like that for the rest of my life. She'll be my number one, which is cute. And then I like Sky goes, well, I didn't come out. I didn't have to come out because I'm just so gay. It's like it was so obvious. I came out. When I was born, I came out. My first word was, ew, why did I come out of that? Yeah. I literally came out of the womb wearing Bette Midler's polka dot dress from Big Business. So everyone pretty much knew.

1:00:33So Jess is speaking with KO now. She's like, I was speaking to Damo, and I think we're a little frustrated with the breaks. Like, I understand we're busy, but, you know, you got to give him a 10-minute break every five minutes. You know, five minutes maybe. Like, you got to do breaks. And he's like, well, hold on. First of all, I have hair.

1:00:53Ben Mandelker: Hair, hair, hair. First of all, I have hair. and um you know uh like some some boats they don't give a fuck so she goes yeah but we give a fuck he goes okay well i'm completely open to suggestions okay your suggestion is to give people breaks yeah that's the suggestion so then there's like this moment so keo is saying talking to kerry and he's saying like oh my goodness there's some good snorkeling whatever and kerry's oh there is maybe we could do a little snorkeling excuse and so they're going to set that up which which is the setup to a future issue that the two of them have in about five seconds.

1:01:26Ben Mandelker: In the meantime, the guests are doing facials, but actual. Also, just to make note for later, K.O. says this is so sick here, here, meaning like right in the spot that we're in. Right. And it's good snorkeling. And he says, yes, so we could do snorkeling excursion. Right. OK. Now, now, amusingly, you you you you clarified that. Right. As I said, the guests are doing facials. And I think it's really important to just note that these were actual, like, you know, for the skin facials. Just because given who our charter members are, just don't want to leave anyone hanging with the wrong impression.

1:02:01Ben Mandelker: But who knows what these people. But they also were probably doing facials. They were like, there was actual sperm under those facials. So the anchor is dropped. And Lawrence is like, oh, I think the boat's in good hands. He's got the whole world in his hands, doesn't he? i'm out goodbye i'll see you on the other side if you're holy enough to make it there later suckers too much sin it's a bit too much sin happening here on this boat it is a sort of funny that like the born again is um is leaving amidst like the most like you know i would have i would imagine the like the the opposite of what i imagine of biblical right um so then he says bye, no one really cares.

1:02:47Ben Mandelker: And then Fraser lets Rainbow go on a snorkeling trip because she's had a hard time. And here's where Celine is washing her foot while eating her croissant. So now Carrie is like, well, would we like to do some snorkeling this morning before lunch? I know that is not a euphemism for anything, so you can get your nose out of his anus right now. What I suggest is we're going to go into this point, which is back here. all right and there's some nice snorkeling so we'll take the tender and we can zoom around in that location right there that i'm specifically pointing at and i know you all care very much about where i'm pointing right now oh my god is that the chef leaving hey i just wanted to tell you the same thing i told the womb bye pussy that's not what i'm gonna say so then carrie carrie has now told them that they're gonna go snorkeling over there wherever there was that's where they're going to go snorkeling but now have they moved a lot didn't the anchor go down or did the anchor go up i honestly i don't know because honestly when when carrie mentioned that that's where they're going to go snorkeling i wasn't paying attention because i just thought it was just a standard like here's what your activity is going to be you didn't realize we're setting up a drama so um carrie goes up to ko and he's like well they locked your idea of snorkeling once i pointed out exactly on the map where you said it was going to be so after lunch we'll take the boat and an interior staff and he's like whoa no no no wait actually it's here the snorkeling spot he's like wait you said it was back there it's no it's in the bay like maybe i miscommunication i don't know like hold on did you know that i have hair yeah yeah yeah but i i just explained hey sorry you just got me with your hair there a little bit i just explained to the guests that the snorkeling is back there now i look like a clown don't i it's like oh look there he is again captain gary don't know where the snorkeling space is oh it's my biggest nightmare first i don't have a uniform then i'm saying it's that patch of water instead of that patch of water where the little fishy are great i'll never leave this one down this is so weird for him to go so mad he's like well let's get correct information before i make a big scene and k is just like um my bad my bad like he doesn't care it's not that do you think sky knocks really gives a where this thing is just tell him sky You're taking selfies underwater right there.

1:05:10He'll jump in. He doesn't care.

1:05:13Ben Mandelker: Guys, who here is very excited to go snorkeling specifically off the right side of the boat? Starboard, is it? I don't know. But I will only go snorkeling where I was previously shown the fish are and no other location around this boat. He's like, listen, you can take me snorkeling here. You could take me snorkeling there. But here's what I'm going to get a picture of in any place. My starfish. Okay. Drop me wherever you want. is it possible to piss in a starfish's hole because it's already surrounded by water am i right i can't i can't so um let's see so anthony is now talking to the chef while the guests head out for snorkeling and um he's like wow look at look at this like you never left wow big thing we want success here You're right, Anthony.

1:06:02He's like, absolutely, absolutely. I will not credit you there. All right. Well, the biggest takeaway I'd like you to consider is we can't always reach that point, right? And some guests don't want that. Sometimes we just need to be mediocre, and that's okay. Do you understand? It is okay to be mediocre. I dare you. I'll throw you off the fucking boat. Lose out.

1:06:25Ben Mandelker: Sometimes you just have to put a giant pile of egg whites on a dish and say, that's breakfast. Okay. So now Anthony is like, no, okay. It was great having Laurence on board, but he helped me come down and just be focused. But now I'm back in this galley alone. And so, you know, I'm kind of nervous about that. Like me getting fired on St. David, the terrible moment. So I was thinking, damn, I'm a loser. I'm a bad chef. So pressure on for here. Honestly, I have everything to lose right now. So he's like, he's like, it makes no sense for me to kill myself if they don't want that. Yeah. That's right.

1:07:01Ben Mandelker: lower standards just like you want on a mega y 'all let's just focus on that we're working on cafeteria food you can do this okay so um kyle sees that the banana is out in the middle of the ocean and he's like oh there's the banana i guess i should get it hello hello banana banana and nobody answers he's like i guess i'll get a seabob and go get it so carrie sees it and he's like you gotta be fucking kidding me that banana doesn't have its uniform is that banana snorkeling in a place that wasn't supposed to be a snorkeling spot so kyle is fetching this banana and and what happened he's like well i don't know i was just i saw a yellow thing floating in the water and i thought fuck it looks like something i could have sex with.

1:07:49Ben Mandelker: Let's get it. So he carries like a good catch, mate. So then meanwhile, the snorkeling, the guys have snorkeled for like five seconds and they're like, okay, we're down. We're bored. Let's go back to the boat. Struggling stupid. So they're coming back earlier than expected and carries like, oh, you got to be kidding me. It's disorganized. Yeah. He's like, oh, I try to support my guys, but I've got so much pressure on myself. I got to be straight up with the guy and let him know how important his job is, how much I rely on him, and that creates pressure. But there's a lot of schoolboy errors being made he should already be aware of.

1:08:26K.O. needs to get his hair in the game. And that's it.

1:08:30Ben Mandelker: I don't think Captain Kerry realises how many scenes he's setting up in gay porn. It's almost like the gay porn stars come onto the boat and he's like, well, there's a lot of schoolboy errors happening around here. I'm going to have to have a one-on-one talk with this person. I'm like, there's another scene. Look at his spunking teddy's back in town and he's not got a uniform on. You realise I'm naked under this towel because I can't find my uniform and I'm very angry about it, so how are we going to fix this situation? What I'm about to tell you is going to be very, very hard. Are you open enough to take it?

1:09:09Ben Mandelker: All I know is there's a long, hard banana just floating around out there and I want you to get it. Need to practice on something. So he calls KOM and he's like, all right, we've got a few things happening. We've got a banana floating away. You know that shouldn't happen, right? I want you to think of it like this way. Banana inside you. All right, banana inside you. You got it? All right. We've got to have communication on point, all right? Now, we've talked about the first day departure. You should have a checklist, all right? Get it pulled. Shoes are bored. Luggage are bored. Dick hard. Ass wide.

1:09:48Loosened up. Why am I talking like this? I can't stop myself.

1:09:53Ben Mandelker: All right. This is how I want you to think about the luggage. Just imagine, if you don't get the luggage, you have to go back to that dock. Maybe with another one of your fellow sailors, and you'll have to sit there alone waiting for the boat to come back and retrieve you. And then you're just both there alone. And then what do you do when you're both alone and bored? Right? that's what I want you to think about. Now, because you forgot that luggage, the entire crew and cast and people on the boat have to be naked. Now what are we going to do, you bad little boy?

1:10:29So he's like, do you have it in you to finish this job or not? And K.O.'s like, oh, I'm pretty sure I can do it, you know. Like, we don't do this normally in Rio, but if you want to do it now, you know, I can do it. I'm not going to lie. I've never had so many people under me. Oh, that's what I'd like to hear. You're going to take more and more people under you, eh?

1:10:47Ben Mandelker: So, you know, the best way to start is at the bottom. You need to put some pressure on your team to not make these schoolboy errors. You know what? I'm so concerned about your schoolboy errors, it seems like something happened back in those days, so why don't you put on a schoolboy uniform and get back up here and we'll diagnose what went wrong. And then And K.O. ends it in the least porny way. He's just like, I need to start focusing on small things. I'm like, whoa, this is a porn episode. I know. Or at least some big things that give you something to focus on. The actual boy errors. Adventure.

1:11:30Ben Mandelker: Yes, queen! So, fun times. Fun times on the boat with the porn stars. And my prediction, K.O., will be fired very soon. yeah he's out of here he's out of here KO in his hair goodbye KO'd alright well everyone thanks for listening such a fun time be sure to come to our live show on Thursday in Hollywood at the Fonda Theatre go to watchwackrappens.com to get your tickets and we will catch you on the next episode bye everyone bye watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors Ain't no thing like Alison King Our way is the Amber way It's the Foster and the Furious It's Amanda Foster She can run my country, it's Angie McGovern It's Always Automatic with Ashley Otto Put your hands together for Carly Clapp Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt We never miss her call, it's Diane Call Erin McNicholas, she don't miss no trick-a-less Hava Nagila Weber You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones I go, you go, we all go for Hugo Jamie She has no last name-y She's our kind of mess It's Jennifer Messer Sips some scotch With Jessica Trotch She's our favorite streamer Caroline Peacock She gets an A It's Kelly B Kristen the Piston Anderson Get a B in your bonnet With Lacey B K-sirah-sirah Whatever we'll be With Lauren Sillsby Rigging the funk It's Leslie Plunkett She gets an A from us It's Lindsay D Let's give a kisserino To Lisa Lino Fresh as a daisy It's Maisie McHenry We love her on the rocks It's Melissa Cox Megan Berg You can't have a burger without the Berg This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian I love-a-ya, Olivia Williamson Tastier than Flanderson It's Rachel Manderson She sure is swell It's Raquel Yes we canna It's Sadana Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman Let's share with Sharon Eldridge The Bay Area Betches, Betches And our super premium sponsors She's VVIP, it's Amanda V.

1:13:37Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin.

1:13:39Ben Mandelker: Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O 'Neill. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides. Let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs. Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland. It's our queen, it's Queen Laifa. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. Hail the cork master, the master of the cork, Jennifer Corcoran. We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. She's a little bit loony. Junie. Knock, knock, knocking on Katie Manok's door. My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo.

1:14:19Ben Mandelker: We love him madly, it's Kyle Pod Chadley. In the study, with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Barron. She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy. Always killing it, it's Low Alkalani. The Incredible Edible Matthews Sisters. She Eases Our Woes, it's Melissa St. Rose. We're On The Floor with Molly Dorsett. There's a Chance of Meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud. She's the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke. We Cannot Tell a Lie, it's Sarah Tell of Sun. Shannon, out of a can, and Anthony. Come on, shake your body, baby, do the Sidney Cogdon. Let's take off with Tam La Plaine. It's always a good time when you're wasting time with Bravo.

1:14:59She Ain't No Shrinkin' Violet Kuchar. We love you guys.