#3614 RHOSLC S7E9: Does This Shark Joy? Live in Dallas

0:00Ben Mandelker: The new Hulu original series, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Orange County, is now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney+.

0:07Ronnie Karam: While competing on Dancing with the Stars in Southern California, Jen Affleck became friends with a different group of women with ties to the Mormon church, some more devout than others.

0:17Ben Mandelker: Now having moved to Orange County from Utah looking for a fresh start, she's brought these groups of women together for a sense of community.

0:23Ronnie Karam: But with each new revelation, the moral divides start pushing them to opposite directions and threaten to shatter the friendship she's hoping to create. Can this sisterhood withstand the pressures of faith, secrets, and drama? Come for the sunshine, stay for the shade. Watch the new Hulu original series, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Orange County, now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply. There is such a better way to spend your time than doom scrolling or watching terrible TV. Get some stories in your life, okay? Audible is perfect for that. I use it while I'm cleaning the house, while I'm running errands.

1:04Ronnie Karam: I listen to books all day, every day with Audible.

1:07Ben Mandelker: Yeah, they have a massive library of audiobooks and ad-free podcasts. And it is really the perfect thing to turn on when you're taking a long drive, washing some dishes. Like, enrich yourself.

1:18Ronnie Karam: New members can start listening with a 30-day free trial at audible.com slash WWC.

1:40Ben Mandelker: What happens when there's so much that happens

2:10Ben Mandelker: and give it a try. We've never done it before.

2:13Ronnie Karam: My fidgety ass. We'll see. It does block you guys from getting ass crack, which you would be getting all night. So I've got like a three-way cover here.

2:21Ben Mandelker: So you're welcome. I wasn't wearing socks that were for this setup, so you may see a little bit of skin over there, everyone. Look. It's getting saucy over here.

2:32Ronnie Karam: I can't do that because you can see that my blood pressure is really bad. Look how my skin indents. When I take off my socks, you can still, even if there's a pattern and you see the pattern on my skin. That's really bad. Don't wear Argyle if you have bad blood pressure. Terrifying.

2:48Ben Mandelker: It's so fun coming back to this theater. Who was here the very first time we came here? Yes. You guys remember Leanne Lockett and Mama D were there?

2:58Ronnie Karam: Oh, don't worry. At least five of you will be canceled by the end of this year.

3:05Ben Mandelker: It's always so fun to be back here in Dallas. You guys are always an amazing, amazing crowd. We see some familiar friends, people we see come to various shows all the time. So we love coming. Are you okay, Ronnie? Are you okay?

3:16Ronnie Karam: Yes, I just feel like I have my back to these people.

3:19Ben Mandelker: All right, well.

3:22Ronnie Karam: I just said no ass crack, and then I turned around and gave every one of you ass crack. So the drive over here, I drive up here from Austin, and I just love coming up here and looking at all the billboards and stuff. So today I passed this donut place. It's like Mary's Donuts or something. And it's a huge lit, you know, one of those lights. It's like, stop here, with arrows pointing down. And it said, don't just trust any bathroom. Go here. It's like Mary's Donuts. Who in Mary's Donuts said, you know what? Sounds really appetizing. Sit here, Mary's Donuts.

4:01Ben Mandelker: If you're looking for a reliable bathroom and a hole, come to Mary's Donuts.

4:07Ronnie Karam: Yes. You're going to get your little donut hole. It's like everybody. You just know everybody's in that line. You just pooped, didn't you?

4:15Ben Mandelker: It's a reliable, reliable donut. Well, yeah, I got in yesterday, which was super fun. I've already been a day here in Dallas. By the way, I hope, did anyone see the news this morning? I was on the Fox 4 News. They were so awesome. It's been a very exciting week because I was on the morning news today. And then on Tuesday, I hung out with none other than Countess Luanne de la Sepse. Because she had the world premiere of her new music video at the Abbey on Tuesday night. To all the boys of love before. It was that song, right? Yeah, it was that one. To all the boys of love before.

5:03Ben Mandelker: So it was like, you know, it was all like the usual people. Kelly Ben Simone was there. Sutton was there.

5:09Ronnie Karam: That's not all the usual people, Kelly Ben Simone. I feel like that's a new one. My God, Luan, that was incredible. That was iconic. I was like crazy.

5:17Ben Mandelker: Please don't talk about deceased people.

5:20Ronnie Karam: Do you guys watch? Are you watching The Golden Life? It's good, right? Me and Dorinda are like so close now. We're like such good friends five minutes later. Dorinda hates me now. Like she yelled at me because we went out and she was talking about Richard. And I was like, please stop talking about dead people. Like I can't. Like I don't even know him. Who is that?

5:40Ben Mandelker: You better back it up, Carrie Benson Moon. Okay. So a lot of our friends in the podcasting space, like Amy Phillips was there. And all her co-hosts like Jessica Roy, et cetera. There were a lot. Kiki Monique was there. who got messy who got drunk and made an ass out of themselves well Countess Luann of course so I was hanging out with Countess Luann it was more like I was talking to people and she came up and she was just having the best time and she was like oh well I hope you come to the tour I'm going to do a Christmas special I was like oh she goes do you want to know what I'm going to be singing at the Christmas special so I go what do I do for Christmas and she goes oh how cheap

6:30Ben Mandelker: she goes the lyric is what do I want for Christmas I go oh but I'm not singing that

6:40Ronnie Karam: Santa baby

6:41Ben Mandelker: she's gonna do Santa baby right she has a song a parody song that I'm not gonna spoil because that would be shitty if I spoiled here also I don't remember it but she starts singing it I'll just make up one on the spot So this is what the, this is what, you know, pretend you're me asking me Countess the Wind questions. Oh my God.

7:02Ronnie Karam: Love you. Song is amazing. So I'll be singing a song.

7:07Ben Mandelker: It's going to say, Sonia Bell, Sonia Bell, Sonia all the way. That's great. Thank you.

7:16Ronnie Karam: That's great. All right. Lean in. Lean in this way.

7:19Ben Mandelker: Oh, what fun it is to run in a one-horse carol. Brad's well can't tell the difference.

7:26Ronnie Karam: It's Countess Luann. It's Countess Luann. Sonia Bells. God bless her heart.

7:35Ben Mandelker: Jack the Hallsward bows of Countess. Fa la la la la la la.

7:41Ronnie Karam: A Countess Christmas show. You know what we call that in some circles is a war on Christmas.

7:46Ben Mandelker: Oh, holy Jill. Cancelled by Bad Bunny

7:54Ronnie Karam: On the first day of Christmas My true love gave it to me dick I got a lying dick on my birthday and Christmas

8:01Ben Mandelker: I will, I'm not lying She went for five minutes Every time we thought she was done She would look around at someone and be like, oh, Candace Luan And she'd be like, oh, hi dear, hi dear And she'd come right back in She'd come right back in On the twelfth day of Cabaret A true love gave it to me It was like literally our version of Countess Luann being done by Luann privately for me. It was the most amazing thing. But it was a great time.

8:27Ronnie Karam: Well, that's the thing about those ladies. They're just like themselves.

8:32Ronnie Karam: They are. They were no different than they are on TV. Yeah. Dorinda was like that. It's like, all right, it's so good to see you. This is crazy. Was it a theater? Were there people here? I do theater. Yeah, I do theater, too. You know what? They have things to drink here. I'm bringing my Bluestone Manna alcohol. You're going to serve it. I don't give a shit if this is a union theater. You're going to sell it. You're going to sell this goddamn thing. They love it. You see that? They love it. They all love it. The whole time. The crappies are rolling credits on the crappies. She's like, thank you very much for coming.

9:05Ronnie Karam: Don't forget the Bluestone Manna. Yeah.

9:09Ben Mandelker: Well, I feel just hashtag blessed that I've already kicked off this week with Countess Luan, and now I get to spend the rest of it here in Dallas with you guys. It's perfect.

9:17Ronnie Karam: And what a night. Well, welcome to Watch With Crappings. A podcast for all that crap we love to talk about on Yobras. My fucking password every time. It's my face. It's my face. Just to not recognize me any single time. It's like I haven't fucked you yet. Why are you already ghosting me? My iPad's like, I don't know you.

9:43Ben Mandelker: Your iPad's like, last Christmas, I gave you Dorinda. Just got possessed by Countess Luann. Oh, you want to get in here? Buy a ticket to my cabaret first. All right.

9:59Ronnie Karam: Previously on the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

10:07Ben Mandelker: Hey, girls. Kwai here. Welcome to my Reiki party. What's Reiki? I don't know, but I have a thirsty friend with a dollar storage ROM, and I haven't thrown a party yet, so go with it. Rum, tum, tum, tum, Reiki, Reiki.

10:24Ronnie Karam: Meredith, Meredith, it's a B. It's a B, Meredith. All right, go for it.

10:30Ben Mandelker: Diet Coke and French fries, French fries, French fries. Diet Coke and French fries, French fries. I'm bored.

10:38Ronnie Karam: Disgustration. Lisa!

10:42Ben Mandelker: Lisa! Lisa, we're trying to get reiki'd. Go ahead, drum sister.

10:48Ronnie Karam: Brum, ding, ding, dong, ding, ding, brum, ding, ding, dong. I will tell you about your deepest selves. Lisa, your throat chakra is painful to everyone's ear chakra.

11:03Ben Mandelker: Oh, my God. I love my throat chakra. My voice teacher calls it my throat chakra-con. I don't get it, though.

11:11Ronnie Karam: You have a voice, teacher, Lisa Barlow.

11:21Ben Mandelker: Whitney's products are all from Alibaba. Meredith doesn't take our clothes off when she urinates. And Heather hasn't been laid in 30 years.

11:35Ronnie Karam: Hey, that was last season. People love Alibaba now.

11:41Ben Mandelker: Yeah, and I just got laid this morning, and I had the Angie's List receipt to prove it.

11:48Ronnie Karam: Am I supposed to be nude while I hear any?

11:53Ben Mandelker: Well, what kind of psychic is this? Hello, can you read my energy? Everyone knows I'm depressed because I'm wearing jeans.

12:03Ronnie Karam: Your head bobbing is throwing my rhythm off. Please be quiet. Oh, and rum-tum-a-tum, Angie, I'm sensing that everyone hates you.

12:15Ben Mandelker: Why would you say that?

12:18Ronnie Karam: They were all yelling, I hate you, as I walked in.

12:23Ben Mandelker: Oh, yeah, well, you are all Twizzlers, long and empty in the middle, and hypocrisists.

12:31Ben Mandelker: Oh, Angie,

12:35Ronnie Karam: shut up and sit down. Just shut up, Angie. All you care about is yourself getting facials.

12:41Ben Mandelker: I can't get a facial. I can't get a facial. You are word salad.

12:47Ronnie Karam: Oh, yeah? Well, what about your friendship ending phrase?

12:51Ben Mandelker: What about your friendship ending phrase?

12:53Ronnie Karam: I can't believe she just repeated friendship ending phrase.

12:56Ben Mandelker: I thought we were talking about facials. We are dying. I am Greek. And scene.

13:09Ben Mandelker: By the way, I have Baby Shark up on my laptop for some reason. Because I was coming up with a name for tonight's episode for the podcast.

13:17Ronnie Karam: Searching for shark themes. So I was like, maybe there's a pun in Baby Shark.

13:20Ben Mandelker: This video has 17 billion views. I'm not even joking. Almost there, Countess Luann. To all the Baby Sharks I've loved before. It's been quite a lot. None of them are married. Baby Shark. Baby Lion Shark

13:42Ronnie Karam: Alright so this is episode 7 Season 7 episode 9 Feed her to the sharks hence the baby shark Just don't get pulled over that looks super creepy Sir You were going a little over this I'm sorry I was just looking at some baby shark videos Wasn't paying attention to the road Episode starts at Meredith's future caviar lounge Enough okay As Main Street Salt Lake City I'm begging you guys, stop it.

14:09Ben Mandelker: What are you talking about?

14:10Ronnie Karam: Meredith's Caviar Place, where you know they're only serving Meredith Caviar. What else are they going to serve in there? And it's right down the street where you can only get the Vita tequila. I need a McDonald's in this fucking town.

14:22Ben Mandelker: It's Park City's number one minimalist, brutalist, former bowling alley turned caviar tasting. Thank you, Georgia, for the inspiration.

14:34Ronnie Karam: It's 5 ,000 square feet Of Meredith caviar No

14:39Ben Mandelker: It's a very very large space That's apparently also a basement Somewhere I don't remember what's upstairs I guess we'll find that as we go through the notes

14:49Ronnie Karam: Oh this is a basement?

14:51Ben Mandelker: I thought she said basement Did anyone else hear a basement Or did my brain just automatically leap there?

14:57Ronnie Karam: I feel like they're all in a basement Isn't Lisa's in a basement?

15:00Ben Mandelker: I feel like so much of this show happens in a basement or a parking lot, let's be honest. Like, I was shocked that the shark party was actually, like, had windows, you know?

15:10Ronnie Karam: Okay, so we are, well, that was Whitney's house, so I don't blame you. Whitney's house is a little weird. Shark party in the basement with the stripper pole. I know. Bobby earned this. It's a Bronco stripper pole. Okay, first of all, We're not at Whitney's stripper pole birthday party yet. We are at Seth and Meredith talking on the phone. So Seth's like, are you at the lounge right now, Mayor? Perhaps. All right, just tell me this. Is the urinal going to be all the way to the ground, or is it going to be one of those urinals that is kind of right under your nuts? Where's the urinal going to be?

15:54Ben Mandelker: Oh, we do not have urinals, Seth. Oh my god. Do all the restaurants have urinals?

16:02Ronnie Karam: 99 % of restaurants have urinals. How else are you going to check out the competition? Come on, Mayor. Come on.

16:08Ben Mandelker: Well, have a toilet and you can go in there and you can pee.

16:14Ronnie Karam: Stuff dedicated to just staying creepy no matter what the scene is. It's like, I'm opening a caviar lunch. Where are we going to hold our dicks?

16:25Ben Mandelker: but I was afterwards like oh I wonder if they're gonna if they will have those urinals that go all the way down to the floor because I kind of like those I do too god we're so lazy pee all over the ground now we go to Lisa's house where Lisa John and Jack are hanging out and Lisa's like Jack I can't wait until you're older when you have cats I'm like he's 21 he's actually like six years behind the curve in Salt Lake City I wonder if even the kids in Salt Lake

16:52Ronnie Karam: City come out with that stupid mushroom hair. At what point do we just start cutting the hair of the children that we see on the TV? It's been a long time. It's like shiplap. Are we done with shiplap yet?

17:06Ben Mandelker: Yeah, I'm gonna be so good if you have kids, Jack. I'll be so great. And he's like, we'll call you grandma. No.

17:13Ronnie Karam: Nobody's calling me grandma. No. Never. I will not be called grandma. I'm going to be, they're going to call me Bennifer.

17:20Ben Mandelker: Yeah. Call me Lily. I'm going to be like Gaga, but I'll be like Lily. I'll be Lily.

17:27Ronnie Karam: It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial.

17:34Ben Mandelker: The new Hulu original series, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Orange County, is now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney+.

17:41Ronnie Karam: While competing on Dancing with the Stars in Southern California, Jen Affleck became friends with a different group of women with ties to the Mormon church, some more devout than others.

17:51Ben Mandelker: Now having moved to Orange County from Utah looking for a fresh start, she's brought these groups of women together for a sense of community.

17:58Ronnie Karam: But with each new revelation, the moral divides start pushing them to opposite directions and threaten to shatter the friendship she's hoping to create. Can this sisterhood withstand the pressures of faith, secrets, and drama? Come for the sunshine, stay for the shade. Watch the new Hulu original series, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Orange County, now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply.

18:23Ben Mandelker: The best pieces in your closet are the ones you can count on, whether you're heading to work, going out, or keeping things casual. And this time of year, Quince makes finding something great for everyone just as easy. This holiday season, it's where I'm shopping for myself and everyone on my list.

18:37Ronnie Karam: Quince focuses on high-quality staples made with premium materials like 100 % Mongolian cashmere, 14-karat gold, and Italian leather. All timeless, versatile pieces that feel special to unwrap and become everyday favorites long after the holidays.

18:53Ben Mandelker: Ronnie, I just got two fabulous button-down shirts from Quince. One was their famous, you know, Mongolian cashmere that everyone always knows about with Quince. and you can also see me wearing it on our YouTube show, What's Your Order, which I do an episode with Kempire and I'm wearing my Quince shirt and I love it.

19:11Ronnie Karam: When it comes to gifting, Quince has a lot more than clothing. Think fine jewelry, leather bags, hotel quality bedding, chef grade cookware and five-star luggage. Basically, plenty of ways to find something special for everyone on your list.

19:23Ben Mandelker: Give the gift of quality this holiday season. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com. Get free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. now available in Canada and the UK too. And when Quince asks where you heard about them, let them know it was, watch what crap happens. It's the best way to support the show.

19:40Ronnie Karam: I'm sick of things stressing me out. The other day I was running late and nearly ran over an armadillo. I felt so bad.

19:46Ben Mandelker: I'll tell you about stress. Imagine performing a cabaret 10 times a week. Or learning a 17th language

19:53Ronnie Karam: like French Peruvian. Bon Gisissimo.

19:57Ben Mandelker: This is why I watch so much TV. And Amazon Prime definitely comes in handy.

20:01Ronnie Karam: It's a great way to shift your mood.

20:03Ben Mandelker: Yeah, but everyone's always like recommending a million shows. Like you got to watch this, you got to watch that. I'm at a point where I don't say, what do I have to watch? Now I'm all about how do I want to feel?

20:13Ronnie Karam: Yeah, the feeling I chase is dark and moody. That's why I go towards crime shows.

20:17Ben Mandelker: Oh, I'm a comedy girly. I will rewatch the same comedy over and over again because it's so comforting to me. Or actually, sometimes it's actually sports. There are times where I don't even care about the teams. I just like being part of a live event, especially with some snacks.

20:30Ronnie Karam: Snacks are a part of the feeling. I love a cracker.

20:33Ben Mandelker: So here's where I'm all about Prime. You can have your shows, your movies, your sports, but you also get fast shipping on the things we like to have when we watch stuff, like the perfect snack, conveniently delivered right to your door for a recap-worthy watch session.

20:48Ronnie Karam: That's how Prime gives us the power to just not find the feeling we crave, but also to let us experience it to the fullest.

20:55Ben Mandelker: I'm having 30 to 40 positive feelings. Wow!

20:57Ronnie Karam: Shows you can't wait for, deliveries you don't wait for. From streaming to fast shipping, it's on Prime. So we go to Blind Rabbit Kitchen.

21:08Ben Mandelker: Which is also the name of their stylist on this show. Because Bronwyn walks in, I think it's Bronwyn walks in, and she looks like she used to have a nice outfit on, but then she encountered a rabid wolf. She's like all in tatters. And then Meredith shows up later in the episode with the same kind of confetti. It's like the stuff you pack things in at the UPS store.

21:32Ronnie Karam: Yes. But if they also stuck to your baldness. You know, like when you take off a sweater. You were saying that the other day, now that you shave your head too, and you take off sweater and you get the fuzz. That's what she looks like. It's fuzz. It's white fuzz. And then over, like, Grinch-colored green fuzz. It's a lot. It's a lot of unneeded fashion. But she's dressed like the Grinch, kind of, because she's meeting Muzzy. Muzzy. And Muzzy, for a minute, after she looks so mean on TV, for a minute, she's like, Bronwyn, I support all of your choices, Bronwyn. I'm just so happy you're my daughter.

22:09Ronnie Karam: And now she's back. Muzzy's like, fuck that. I was nice to people for six months. It hurts.

22:19Ben Mandelker: So Bronwyn's like, well, I'm dying to see what Brandon eats here because he's very healthy, but you're a little excited to meet him, aren't you, Mom? Aren't you, Mom? Right? Aren't you, Mom? He's a lot hotter than Todd. Right, Mom? Right, Mom?

22:27Ronnie Karam: Muzzy's like, I might be very quiet today. You might not hear me speak, but one thing you will hear is my eyebrow. Like, damn, how high does that thing go? Her judgy eyebrow is really good. That's one thing you lose with Botox is that.

22:44Ben Mandelker: She's just going to rip open her shirt and just have that T-shirt underneath that goes, everything's fine, everything's fine. Yes. So Muzzy's like, I might be very quiet, which is like what she always is anyway. It's like, oh, you know, normally Muzzy always shouting at the top of her lungs, you know, throwing her bra around.

23:01Ronnie Karam: Muzzy just killing you with kindness everywhere you go. Just effusive Muzzy. It's what we're all used to. Well, Muzzy has written off every man that I have every day. I mean, that's pretty sure. I mean, I don't know. They were shorter. Maybe they were shorter than she thought they were going to be. Maybe they were poorer than she thought they were going to be. I don't know. It's just Muzzy. Yeah.

23:23Ben Mandelker: One had a backwards hat on, and she thought that was disrespectful. Oh, so I, you know, this is going to be hard. This is going to be really hard. So I've already arranged for him to come in in a wig that looks like a bob. So she'll feel safe.

23:35Ronnie Karam: Well, you say I'm mean to every man you ever dated. I would never mean to Todd. I love Todd. Well, yeah, you love Todd. He pays for everything. I love Todd. I'm not even there. I just love Todd in hopes that he'll pay for some shit.

23:46Ben Mandelker: So Brandon walks in and Muzzy's like, your bob's on backwards. Typical. And he's, your bob's on backwards. Why can't they get their headwear straight?

23:57Ronnie Karam: I'm going to say this. Brandon is a cute guy, I guess. But he's too young for that much Botox. Right? He's too cute for that much Botox. I feel like if you're born that cute, leave the Botox for us. I feel like you should be proud enough of your cuteness to walk around like that. But he's too young to be like, hello, nice to meet you, Muzzy. Hello, nice to meet you. I'm like, are you smiling or are you about to kill Muzzy? I'd actually, you know, I wouldn't blame you for either But give me something, Brandon

24:30Ben Mandelker: I feel like he was really trying to do his male model charm on Muzzy And I feel like she was, like, not allowing it whatsoever Which I really appreciated I love it, like, when hot people can't use their hotness, you know Because she just kept on staring at him like, die, die

24:44Ronnie Karam: I feel like Muzzy wanted to fuck this guy, too I mean, I feel like he was winning her over Because she was trying to be grumpy, like oh, well, first you're late, and then you're young. I guess you're going to say your favorite color is beige. Like she's trying to be an asshole, but in a very, I don't know, I found it quite sexy.

25:10Ben Mandelker: She has her leg up like, are you trying to seduce me, Miss Muzzy? He starts calling her Queen Muzzy, which, because she's like, you know, he's like, what should I call you, whatever. and she makes a joke, like Queen or something. So he starts calling her Queen Muzzy, but he does it so many times that I actually really disliked it. Did anyone else feel that way? I was like, can you not be patronizing to Muzzy, okay? You showed up without a bob. It's insulting enough.

25:35Ronnie Karam: I feel like in a way Muzzy was being nice to him by giving him every opportunity to say, yes, Queen, over and over again.

25:45Ben Mandelker: So he really sells hard that he grew up in a Pentecostal household. old. He's like, I'm very religious. I'm very, very religious. Religion. God, I love religion. The only thing I like more than religion is Meredith and Lisa's songwriting skills. God.

26:01Ronnie Karam: I find when people are like, well, I'm very religious. And you say, oh, well, I'm also very religious. It doesn't count if you're not the same religion because they're taught that you're going to go to hell because of your religion. It doesn't matter what it is. It's like, wow, you're very religious. I'm Mormon. Enjoy your coffee in hell. You neocostal pussy.

26:22Ben Mandelker: And I loved every time it seemed like things weren't going well, Bronwyn turned to like Norman Desmond. She's like... She kept on flaring her eyes. I'm like...

26:37Ben Mandelker: I'm wacky!

26:41Ronnie Karam: So, Muzzy's giving him a hard time and hard on time. She muzzies hard.

26:49Ronnie Karam: So she kind of warms up to him and Bronwyn's like, well, you know, I'm just so sad that we don't have an audience, especially someone like Miss Lisa Barlow, to see that this is completely not done for publicity. This is not done for publicity at all. I brought my mother to meet this young, handsome model I've been dating for five minutes, which is totally normal for me and my mother. So it's not publicity at all. No, no. It's authentic.

27:13Ben Mandelker: It's an authentic relationship that's going to last for the next six days and then fall apart on TV.

27:19Ronnie Karam: Oh, we'll see how authentic it is when the check comes. So then we go to... You may not pay me in cash, but you can pay me in a side of French fries. I'm like that.

27:34Ben Mandelker: So then we go over to Whitney's house where all the fun lives. Bless her heart. And it's Justin and Whitney here to shoot a scene together. By the way, has anyone played the new Zelda that came out? Okay, wrong audience. You're crossing streams now.

27:51Ronnie Karam: Crossing streams. Oh, that guy has. If you played Zelda. I don't blame you. It's an awkward room to stand up and be like, yes!

28:00Ben Mandelker: Zelda, bitch! There's these characters in Zelda called Gorons, and every time I see one, I'm like, it's Justin. Just look it up afterwards.

28:09Ronnie Karam: Justin's kind of fine, right? And then they show that picture of shirtless Justin. Is it just shirtless? What is it? I've never thought he was hot.

28:16Ben Mandelker: We are not going to say that Justin is fine and shit on Brandon. I'm sorry. That's just not what I'm going to do. Brandon's fine too.

28:24Ronnie Karam: Justin's Botox is better. It's not like who's more boner inducing. I mean, I think you can get a boner for everybody and still judge somebody's Botox.

28:31Ben Mandelker: I feel like Justin has enrolled in a Willard Scott lookalike competition. Okay. It's just it's not doing it for me.

28:37Ronnie Karam: Well, Willard Scott lived to be a hundred and something. Did he? Or was he just always saying happy birthday to a hundred people?

28:44Ben Mandelker: He just was always saying happy birthday. Well, actually, I think he lived a long life.

28:47Ronnie Karam: You know, Willard Scott got laid, though, all the time. Guys, it's really important for us to have.

28:50Ben Mandelker: Happy birthday.

28:51Ronnie Karam: And, you know, he was just going off the screen like, I'm not being like this today. I'm so sorry.

28:56Ben Mandelker: You know what I love about our podcast is our constant outreach to younger generations with our Willard Scott content.

29:05Ronnie Karam: Willard Scott got laid. You guys know he did. Anyway, Justin's... I think Justin's hot.

29:11Ben Mandelker: There, I said it. Okay. You know what?

29:14Ronnie Karam: I mean, you know, little...

29:14Ben Mandelker: Everyone has their... You know what? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I to say? You know? I'm sorry. You know what? You think that Justin is hot, and that's okay. It just so happens to be that my ex, Mario, was the hottest of all. Okay? Sorry. He's the hottest.

29:31Ronnie Karam: Is it just like doing... Is it just working out, do you think? I don't know what it is. but now I have all this time to think about Justin. Oh my God, Justin. Okay, so Whitney just being very, this is stuff I do every day. Me and Justin are having problems. So I'm moving to this other room where I'm just putting stacks and stacks of Waldrose beauty and prism. It's like all the office cells. Prism. He's like, how are you feeling today? And she's like, I'm feeling okay. hey, I'm just unpacking my divorce stuff. Like, that is your product.

30:11Ben Mandelker: It was fated that we're going to do Salt Lake City here tonight because there's a place behind the theater called Prism. Prism, they stole my idea. You exploited my business, vagina.

30:25Ronnie Karam: Well, we're having a birthday party for Bobby, but it's just the beginning of it. I can't believe she's turning 16. I cannot believe Bobby is turning 16. Do you remember it was just yesterday when she went to the roller skating rink and got shit-faced on soda because it had caffeine? And Wendy's like, you can have caffeine. I said, oh yeah. You bet you're all at some fucking caffeine. I said, no 7-ups over here.

30:57Ben Mandelker: I was fully expecting her to Thelma and Louise that golf cart they gave her. Just be like, today, Bobby drove a golf cart into the Grand Canyon.

31:04Ronnie Karam: Whitney is going to just insist on putting the public at danger with her children. I know. She was too young for that giant golf cart thing. And now she gets her one of the biggest cars on the market. Don't put your 16... Your 16-year-old might be safer. I'm not safer when they're in that giant-ass car running people down in crosswalks.

31:25Ben Mandelker: And also, she's raising the bar too much for the other kids. Because the other kids are now going to want a nice SUV. I mean, you're just not, it's just, you got to start them with a used Honda Civic from 1997.

31:35Ronnie Karam: Yeah. You got to give them something they can wreck a couple of times.

31:39Ben Mandelker: Yeah. You don't start them high. Okay. You got to make them work for it. So just a little bit, you know, cause she will crash that thing.

31:46Ronnie Karam: Well, we're having a shark party and we're going all out with the theme. So she's ordered a ton of stuff from Amazon that has sharks on it, which is great. Because she's going all out. Yeah. If Shark Week met Outer Banks and had a baby.

32:07Ben Mandelker: It would be a shark that works at the bank.

32:17Ronnie Karam: But the bank is outside. Just Whitney confounding herself. Everything's going to be shark. And then I asked Bronwyn to come as a blow up shark. Oh, for Christ's sake. Justin's like, that sounds cute. Who's coming? Who's coming? I don't know. I'm not going to invite everyone. People I don't like don't get to come to my 16-year-old shark party. Oh, God forbid. Oh, I'm so sorry. I was mean to you. I don't get to come to Bobby's Shark Week party.

32:52Ben Mandelker: Oh, no. I guess I have to go drink booze and eat caviar.

32:58Ronnie Karam: I can't believe I'm hanging out with adults today.

33:03Ben Mandelker: So now we have a flashback of Whitney on the phone with Kwai. And Whitney's like, so can you make it? And Kwai's like, yeah, but Meredith is also doing a get-together, so I'll go to hers first. Wow. I'm honestly glad Meredith is having an event at the same day because I wasn't going to invite her anyways. Thanks for giving me an update on the partiful for your daughter's birthday.

33:28Ronnie Karam: I like that Meredith is having a party for her kid on the same day Meredith is having a party for some beluga whales kid.

33:39Ben Mandelker: It's all eggs.

33:41Ronnie Karam: It's all like a reproduction day.

33:45Ben Mandelker: So Whitney is talking to Justin and she's like, every time we're all together, it's just like pure chaos. And Justin's like, yeah, we don't want chaos at the party. I'm like, you're going to have 40 teenagers high off of Mountain Dew. Say goodbye to your chandelier.

34:01Ronnie Karam: So Whitney's updating Justin on all the ghosts, like that Mary and Angie, you know, Angie got in trouble. But I don't know, something is going on there. And he's like, well, you know, Sean and I had lunch a while ago, and we shared some frustrations we both had. Confess. What shit did the husbands talk? That's all I care about. I don't care about the shark party. Because, you know, and he's like, whoa, we barely talked about anything. Then why are you confessing on camera? Go ahead, say it. Who's Sean fucking? Who is it? Who are you fucking? Who's everybody on this show fucking? Tell me right now, husband.

34:35Ronnie Karam: You had a Chili's date with husbands.

34:37Ben Mandelker: And how much chocolate syrup did you use? So Whitney is like, yeah, it's like, it's been nice. He's like, hey, how have you been enjoying sleeping in a different room for me? She's like, it's great. I love, like, not sleeping next to all that bad energy. He's like, whoa. No, the bad energy that we have together, that's mainly you. He's like, okay.

35:04Ronnie Karam: I like sleeping next to Alibaba moisturizer with my child's name on it. Prism. He's like, wow, what do you think? She's like, well, not that you have bad energy, but that we have bad energy, but that you do in the bed too. And he's like,

35:24Ben Mandelker: Hey, remember when we went to Cabo like last week and like you were like walking with the girls and you were like walking on the beach and then like a guy came selling hats and you just like walked, you kept walking and then you got like a margarita and it was like one of those sticks and then you were like habla anglaise and he was like, no. And then you were like, uh-oh. And so then you kept on walking but you stepped on a seashell and then you're like, oh no, I hope it's not a cut but it wasn't a cut and then we got to the hotel room and you're like, wait a second, I left something down at the beach so you went back to the beach and you walked by the guy with a hat and then you went and got another margarita and he was like, hobble anglaise.

36:03Ben Mandelker: I was like, you are so hot.

36:08Ronnie Karam: Even Justin's teeth are asleep. Justin's like,

36:14Ronnie Karam: so she's like, and then member, then we made love and our family trip in Cabo even though I'm leaving you on TV? And he's like, yeah. She's like, yeah. For that one minute, I felt a spark again. But normally, I don't have it. Like, you're gross. I don't even want to be around. And he's like, look,

36:35Ben Mandelker: my teeth don't want to be in a relationship if you're not in it, you know?

36:39Ronnie Karam: I mean, I kind of got his point, you know? I get when your friend's like, oh my God, I got the ick. And I don't want to be around the guy. Well, the guy still has to be, like, I don't know. You still have to show, he still has to show up in there, really. I don't know. If anybody told me I got the ick, that gives me the ick. Like, why would I want to be around your non-boner for me? That is like the most unattractive thing about someone is them not liking me.

37:06Ben Mandelker: Yeah. He's like, look, I need an answer because one of my strengths is patience. Another one of my strengths is writing my name in chocolate syrup with my ding-dong.

37:18Ronnie Karam: And another is getting fucked even if I'm in a marriage. We both know that. So what are we doing here?

37:25Ben Mandelker: What are we doing? So then Whitney is like crying. She's like, I love you though, but I don't know any time. I don't know because I wanted my product.

37:36Ronnie Karam: You stopped my products from being in Sephora. That is still Whitney's complaint That Justin ruined her business And she was going to be in the Sephora No I'm sorry Sephora said no I called them I said do you guys have I was like do you guys have Whitney Rose Or what is it called? Iris and Bo What's the other one?

38:02Ben Mandelker: Iris and Prism Iris and Bo

38:05Ronnie Karam: Stanford Prism Experiment Wow Wild Rose, that's right. What? Do you have Wild Rose Beauty? Like, ew, I know.

38:15Ben Mandelker: It's hung up on me. So then we go to a place called Memory Park, which is hilarious because it's Lisa and Heather, and they're going to talk about memories and stuff. And Heather's like, oh, my God, I thought we were going to get some cardio in with all this walking in the sisterhood. My blood is pumping. Lisa's like, yeah, when I go on a walk, I really mean I'm going to sit and bitch about things. Yeah. I don't walk.

38:39Ronnie Karam: That's disgusting. How can people not like Lisa Barlow? I don't know. The woman does a lot wrong, but not really lately. I'm not walking. That's disgusting. It's a good season for her. I do Wendy's commercials.

38:51Ben Mandelker: We're sitting down. And then we cut briefly to Mary's house and her niece and her niece's daughter are doing the dishes. Or is it her niece?

39:00Ronnie Karam: We don't fucking know, because it's Mary Cosby. No matter what is going on in Mary's life, whether it's good, whether it's terrible, Mary will always find someone to call her family so they can work at her house for free. Yes. She does it every season. And then she's like, wait, you're my, you're my cousin. You're my cousin, right? And then you're my cousin too. And they're like, mom, yeah, we're your cousin. Okay. Because of my religion. And they all have to cannot charge you to clean your house. Right.

39:29Ben Mandelker: I love that they all have to wear masks, but Mary doesn't. They're always in hazmat suits And she's just walking around So then Now Angie joins Heather and Lisa At the park And Heather's like Angie, last time I saw her She was inconsolable And she's just not realizing what she's done And it's so clear that Angie is spinning out Mainly because she's just walking in circles Trying to find us at this park But she basically says

39:57Ronnie Karam: She's still walking around throwing twizzlers at people And calling everybody word salad

40:02Ben Mandelker: She just borrowed a shovel from a child and said, I need this for a prop in my scene. I'll give it right back.

40:08Ronnie Karam: She said horrible things to Mary. I'm just wondering how she's recovering from the horrible things she said to Mary. So Angie comes and Angie is telling us things have not been great with Sean and I. But also I told Sean about what happened with Mary and he hurt in his heart for me. because he knows we are close.

40:33Ben Mandelker: Do you ever... Like, this happens a lot on the Housewives. Like, there'll be a fight. There'll be like, you know, the fight's going to be like, you spilled coffee on my jeans. And then I went home and I told my husband and for three days he didn't get out of bed. I'm like... I feel like 95 % of what the husbands say is like, okay, cool, well, hopefully it works out for you guys. I was like, he was destroyed.

40:58Ronnie Karam: Also, could we get that body pillow back in the middle of us? Because this is, I can hear you way too well. I really want a memory foam wall right here. Hand me that. Hand me that. I love when people do that, though. They're like, oh, really? My husband is really upset with you. The fuck do I care? I know. Seriously. Don't marry that loser. You're the dummy who married him.

41:22Ben Mandelker: so Angie Angie's saying that because she has she's been keeping her feel what's going on with Sean on the inside that she's basically like a ticking time bomb and like of course this was going to happen so now she's going to start well she says she's going to start telling people so I guess she starts that in this scene she starts to tell Lisa about her and Sean

41:40Ronnie Karam: you waited too long no no not you I'm saying no to her how many times a day do you feel like I'm doing that like now No, to Angie, you can't do that now. You should have done it before. You can't hold your bad news until the right moment because then it's going to be the wrong moment. And now you can never say it without looking like you're using this as an excuse for your thing. You should have said it at the beginning. Then you would have already had a belt-in excuse. You're using it too late. Do I need to teach you how to manipulate people?

42:12Ben Mandelker: Scattered applause for telling bad news sooner so that way when it does one-up someone, it's more innocent.

42:17Ronnie Karam: Well, it's not like an 11 o 'clock number in a Broadway show. You know what I mean? Where you're like, I'm going to wait, and then I'm going to come out and be like, my divorce, just get it over, make it the opening. You know, like we got trouble right here in River City, whatever. Well, that wasn't an opening. You get it.

42:32Ben Mandelker: Yeah. And honestly, I think the best person to tell first is Lisa, because that's a way you can ease into telling bad news, because you can say, Lisa, my marriage is falling apart. Oh, my God, that happened to me, too. Yeah, mine, too. Can I tell you? Mine, too. It was horrible.

42:47Ronnie Karam: Yeah. I'm still traumatized.

42:49Ben Mandelker: John actually contradicted me at a salad place once, and it was terrible for a year.

42:53Ronnie Karam: John was so mean to me last year. It was so mean to me. It was useless. She's trying to be like, oh, my God, I'm finally opening up about my relationship. Yeah, mine is worse. And she's like, you just see Angie's face like, you fucking bitch.

43:09Ben Mandelker: But now she's like, technically, I told her. So basically, but it's actually a nice scene. They do rally around Angie, because Angie is really falling apart. And they're just like, don't throw away 30 years. Also, do we still get the discount on the haircuts if you guys get divorced?

43:27Ronnie Karam: Yeah. And Lisa's like, you know, because I went through something so similar and then John told me, like I remember he had a chicken nugget in his mouth and he told me, I said, what are you saying, John? And I think it meant like he apologizes because he wasn't really nice to me last year. And Angie's like, well, that is some acknowledgement. At least Sean just kept putting more pillows in between us. Yeah.

43:55Ben Mandelker: He also kept on fondling the Grindr Award. What was that about?

44:03Ben Mandelker: So they're basically like, yeah, just, you know.

44:07Ronnie Karam: Yeah, you know what? But I wouldn't give up. Like, just because John's an asshole for like, I don't know, 17 of the 18 years that we're together, I'm not going to just give up on people. You have to stay together. That's what you do. And she's like, okay, I will try. And Heather's like, that's horrible. You were so triggered, but you still really messed up, Ange.

44:35Ben Mandelker: Mary's like the final boss, right? It's like, oh, you pissed off Mary. That's going to be three years in the penalty box for you, Angie. Yes. Sorry. Because Lisa's like, yeah, when she was mad at me, I just had to take it. And that's what I famously did. I just sat there and I took it and I was totally chill about it.

44:53Ronnie Karam: Lisa's rewriting. Yeah. You know, Mary and I have gone through stuff too. You know, she said horrible things. I said probably less horrible. I mean, I don't know. Maybe the things I said that were horrible made slightly more sense than the horrible thing. Anyway, the point is you're going to have to eat shut for like 10 years. Have fun, Ange. Yeah. Commercials, here comes one right now.

45:19Ben Mandelker: The new Hulu original series, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Orange County, is now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney+.

45:26Ronnie Karam: While competing on Dancing with the Stars in Southern California, Jen Affleck became friends with a different group of women with ties to the Mormon church, some more devout than others.

45:36Ben Mandelker: Now having moved to Orange County from Utah looking for a fresh start, she's brought these groups of women together for a sense of community.

45:43Ronnie Karam: But with each new revelation, the moral divides start pushing them to opposite directions and threaten to shatter the friendship she's hoping to create. Can this sisterhood withstand the pressures of faith, secrets, and drama? Come for the sunshine, stay for the shade. Watch the new Hulu original series, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Orange County, now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply. We watch a lot of people show up to parties they weren't invited to, to dinners they intend to ruin. Let's talk about people who show up for good and for real.

46:16Ben Mandelker: At Planned Parenthood Health Centers, providers, staff, and volunteers still show up every day despite relentless attacks doing the very unglamorous work of getting people care.

46:27Ronnie Karam: Now they're asking you to show up for real. Make a gift today at plannedparenthood.org slash defend. then go tell the group chat about it.

46:37Ben Mandelker: So then we go over to this hip new spot in maybe a basement, we don't know. It's Meredith's Caviar Lounge and she's talking to the chef and she tells us, oh, I am opening a fabulous Caviar Lounge at the bottom of Main Street in Park City. Oh, you know what it was? Like, wow. She said bottom of Main Street and I was thinking that was a restaurant and she was underneath the restaurant. makes a lot more sense now.

47:04Ronnie Karam: Well, the bottom of Main Street, I thought Jen Shaw's assistant was back.

47:09Ben Mandelker: Stealing purses. Grind a reward.

47:13Ronnie Karam: Sorry. I couldn't insert myself in there because I ain't on no Main Street. Everybody knows it.

47:19Ben Mandelker: This has been a work in progress for a while, much like my wig. And now that I've finally found my space, everything is just going up from here. Perfection.

47:31Ronnie Karam: We're so excited to be here, Chef Matt Nelson. He's like, uh-huh. We're going to come up with so many products. I hope the ladies like your recipes.

47:44Ben Mandelker: He's like, uh-huh. We're going to taste the food you put out, and we're going to use two of the finest palates of all of Salt Lake City, Lisa Barlow and Mary Cosby.

47:55Ronnie Karam: So I didn't invite Brown or Whitney,

48:04Ronnie Karam: It's from nice to just... So then we go to Whitney's house. It's Bobby's birthday party. And Justin's like, wow, this charcuterie looks really good. It's still one of the better pronounced charcuteries that we've heard on Bravo. So you have to hand it to him.

48:21Ben Mandelker: Do you know that somewhere in Valley Village, Brittany's like, charcuterie, that is really cute.

48:28Ben Mandelker: I feel like she's done that.

48:30Ronnie Karam: Has she not, Brittany?

48:32Ben Mandelker: I think she just says it that way, but she never actually realized that there could be a pun, too. She's like, oh, sharks and cute and re? That's hilarious.

48:43Ronnie Karam: Well, you should look around at all the snacks I had at Bobby's party. There's gummies that are shark-shaped. There's also pretzels. I just want my children To always have this level of a life I was like whoa Yeah sure really Some gummy sharks And then there's some big They look like Christmas balls Did you see those stacked on top of each other They're like big white Christmas I don't know what Whitney's doing Must have been from the prism collection

49:16Ben Mandelker: So They also have There's this car with a bow on it and everything, and Whitney's like, to all my haters out there who think I can afford this, I can, and I paid cash, and also, I can't afford it.

49:35Ronnie Karam: Whitney's such a ding-dong. You don't buy a Ford, what is that, a Ford Bronco? What is that sort of thing? Don't buy that in cash. Sharko. Those things, I think they break down too much. They're too cute to last lease. So, Whitney, not everyone, just specifically those.

49:51Ben Mandelker: No, I'm just laughing. So, uh, so, uh, we just, I'm not going to let you.

49:55Ronnie Karam: I want to talk about car leases now for half an hour. Okay. So, uh, Whitney and Justin, sorry. Whitney and Justin, let's look at the car we got for Bobby. I got this car, not Justin, only me. Bobby, come out and look at the surprise that I got. Justin, stay over there, Justin. Poor Justin was just eating shit over there. Like, I didn't get anything. Bobby's like, oh my god, brother, you are amazing. You cannot drive this car. How many Coke Zeros have you had, young lady? Fuck, I'll try where the fuck I want to.

50:32Ben Mandelker: So Bronwyn is the first to come over to the shark party. And because she is famously very wacky on the show, she shows up looking normal and with a scowl on her face. And she's like, so Whitney's like, oh, hey, what have you been up to? She's like, oh, well, well, Brandon was here. And he met my mom. I went like this. And we had lunch. He got the shrimp salad, just like my mom, which was great. And three of us just had a great time. It was really great. And I think this is a forever relationship. Yeah, thank you.

51:02Ronnie Karam: Well, I don't know if Bronwyn is happy or if she's being plowed in the bedroom over and over again. Shark party. No, you know, well, Gwen doesn't want to meet him yet. She's not going to meet him because it hasn't been six months yet. And one of us has some boundaries, and her name is Gwendolyn. So, you know, Gwen's not meeting her yet. She's like, wow, that's a good boundary.

51:27Ben Mandelker: So then Angie shows up, and she's like, hello, am I the first one here? Hi, I'm right here. I think your shark balloon is talking. No, it's me, it's Bronwyn. I'm actually here at this party. Something is talking. Is there a car in the garage that's talking? The car came alive and is talking. The car is nodding. I can tell the car is nodding.

51:47Ronnie Karam: So Lisa Barlow does a really good job Of just over mentioning Or not even over but like the lip liner And then she gets a lip liner deal Or like I like Wendy's And then she gets a Wendy's deal So Angie threw a Twizzler last week And had a breakdown and almost got herself cancelled So she shows up with a canister of Twizzlers today I'm dead No What are you doing Twizzlers On the day you almost got cancelled Everybody, please forget about this cancellation day. I'm going to wave Twizzlers around again. It's my think.

52:20Ben Mandelker: Wow, I can't believe you brought an entire jug of skinny, bloody sharks. So, Winnie just has no idea what they are. Twizzler. So, Angie comes in and she gives Bronwyn a very quick hug. And then she just completely ignores her. And she keeps on saying, so I'm the first one here, right? One of the other ladies is going to be here. Anyone else here? Just me.

52:45Ronnie Karam: Okay, Bronwyn. And Bronwyn's like, well, it seems like someone is slithering like a snake.

52:56Ben Mandelker: So Whitney is like, it's very apparent that Angie is extremely uncomfortable. It's like when you come home late from curfew and parents are sitting in family room and you're like, hey, I feel like I'm in trouble. Yeah, I was like that

53:17Ronnie Karam: Now, Heather Is Heather here yet? Angie and Heather are making dicks and balls Out of the lunch meat and the cucumber And Heather's gonna be inappropriate When she comes to your child's party She always is She's like, wow, you having sex yet? Brittany's child You're gonna have a threesome With those guys over there at the bar And Angie was helping her this time Heather was making like a I guess a vagina? In theory. I don't know. What is that? I was just going with the artwork. I know Georgia O 'Keeffe. That's the most I've seen. And the one I came out of. I was like, bye! Bye! Never again. Never see you again.

54:01Ronnie Karam: Never again. Anyway, the point is they were making vaginas and stuff. So, Justin is like, I just texted Sean. We're going to get together. Maybe he should come. Yeah, maybe you should come and talk your shit on camera so we know what the hell's going on on this show. Bunch of swinging motherfuckers. Do you think they're all swingers on this show?

54:19Ben Mandelker: Maybe. Yeah, why not?

54:21Ronnie Karam: I saw the Bravo preview for that new show, that small town trouble, Texas. Yeah. By the way, just for the record,

54:29Ben Mandelker: the people of Texas just booed the Texas show. Just want to point that out.

54:32Ronnie Karam: That's pretty bad. That's pretty bad if you're getting booed in Texas for your Texas show. But they're like, I like vaginas too. Oh, I kind of like vaginas. That's the trend, I guess. It's not that that doesn't exist. I mean, people do like vaginas, obviously. It's just a lot of people on one show talking about vaginas. It's like, this is Bravo. You're talking too much about vaginas. Scary.

55:00Ben Mandelker: So then Justin says that he texted Sean. He's like, yeah, we're going to get together, but you should come. I mean, he's just leaving me here by myself. And Angie's like, well, I thought it was like a girl's party. He's like, yeah, I guess so. By the way, you've got nice tits, Justin.

55:19Ronnie Karam: You are hot, Justin. Heather's like, yeah, wow, ride them, cowboy. You're so hot. I hope Whitney knows what she's got. And Angie's like, yeah, if she ever dumps you, we will take you. And he's like, awkward teeth.

55:34Ben Mandelker: Hey. At least she didn't get to see him walking on the beach in Cabo. He was so hot.

55:41Ronnie Karam: So we see Kwai's brother. I don't care. Okay, so then we go to Meredith's caviar lounge. And people start arriving. And there's one table in this huge cavernous space. It's like, welcome to caviar.

56:02Ben Mandelker: So this is very much like reminiscent of Tamra showing off Cut Fitness before it's open. It's like, well, we don't have anything. They do this on the show quite a bit. It's like, guys, I am going to be making a restaurant. It'll be open in four years. Here is the construction site. And we're going to have cocktails and champagne here. Enjoy. Don't get a splinter. You're like, thanks. Okay.

56:26Ronnie Karam: Yeah. And then Mary has this quirky moment with Kwai. So there's, you know, it's like this big cavernous space, but something has to hold up the walls, right? So there's like poles. And so they're walking on either side, and Mary's like, no, Kwai, come back. Don't split the pole. Or you'll split our friendship.

56:52Ben Mandelker: Heard that before. I didn't even know that Mary knew who Kwai was. Yeah. So then Meredith's like, well, everyone gather around. This caviar den is called perhaps. Because it's my favorite word in the English language. Perhaps.

57:16Ronnie Karam: And then we see a clip, like a montage of Meredith, in fact, saying perhaps over and over again. I study Meredith Marks. Like that's what I study I've never noticed that she says perhaps

57:30Ben Mandelker: Did you? I don't think it's crazy to say perhaps a lot I'm just going to say that I'm just going to put it out there I think it's like a pretty normal word It's like saying and I don't know

57:42Ronnie Karam: Welcome to my hot dog restaurant But To me this sounded like

57:49Ben Mandelker: A Mark's family echo chamber Or mom, you know what you should call it. Perhaps. Yeah, mom. That's like iconic. Perhaps. Yeah.

58:01Ronnie Karam: Perhaps. Mom, I was going to send an email to people about you having a restaurant called Perhaps, but I don't know if you're ready for me to send the email about it.

58:11Ben Mandelker: Well, perhaps I am. Yeah, that was funny. Perhaps. I like it. I like it. Name it perhaps. I can see it. P-E-R-H-A-P-S Yes, it's a word. Perhaps.

58:26Ronnie Karam: And so they're asking the ladies, do you like the name perhaps for this place? And Mary's like...

58:37Ronnie Karam: Yeah. And Kwai's like, perhaps.

58:45Ben Mandelker: Mary's like, well, I can see the potential. It's beautiful. Yeah, there's nothing but potential. It's an empty room.

58:51Ronnie Karam: Yeah, you know, like maybe some people could think this is trying to compete with my gorgeous lounge space right up Main Street, but perhaps I'm just a great friend and perhaps I don't really perhaps give a fuck. Like seriously, she can do whatever she wants. I perhaps support the bitch. She's not going to like that. That's a lot of fans being split up between caviar, like caviar we don't really want to eat and tequila we don't really want to drink. That's a lot you're asking from us. Perhaps. Bravo fans.

59:21Ben Mandelker: So they ask how Robert Sr. is doing, and Mary says she wasn't going to tell Robert Sr. about her fight with Angie, but she did, and then he was really, really bummed out by it, and he was really, really sad. And then we go back to Whitney's house, and Angie's like, okay, since we are here at a child's birthday party, let me talk to you about divorce.

59:45Ronnie Karam: I have tried to reach out to Mary to apologize even though I am traumatized from Sean and she has not responded to my text. And then we go back to Meredith and she's like, well, have you communicated perhaps with Angie yet? She's like, okay, all right, Meredith. No, I have not. I have blocked her. Okay, she's blocked on my phone, so I have no idea.

1:00:13Ronnie Karam: So we go back to Whitney's, and Angie's like, I do not know what to say for myself. And Heather's like, yeah, we feel terrible. You really boned that one, Ange. Huge trouble.

1:00:25Ben Mandelker: I guess that me and Whitney are the best duo now. Oh, well, tucks for you guys. Oh, well.

1:00:32Ronnie Karam: You know, and Bronwyn's like, wow, I hate you. And even I feel bad for you. That is really rough. That is really rough, Ange. You are going to be canceled. old. I mean, you were the physical embodiment of jeans. Just terrible depression.

1:00:47Ben Mandelker: So Angie has actually touched that. She's like, you know, considering that we're supposed to be in a fight this season, the fact that she's being so nice to me is really nice. It reminds me that I like her, which is like the nicest thing you can say on like a housewife show, you know? So then we go back to Meredith's lounge and Lisa's like, Mary, you and I have like talked to you like a lot, you know, like when I talk, you're like, tell me more, tell me more. I'm like, okay, I know. Cause I'm like a very compelling speaker. That's what like Ben and Blake always say. So anyway, I just feel really great about our dynamic and our relationship now.

1:01:18Ben Mandelker: And I just feel like even when we're like nose to nose, that means that we're like, why do we have our noses against each other? Like, why are we doing that? You know what I'm saying? I just feel like it's like really good.

1:01:28Ronnie Karam: Yeah, because we've like gone at it, but like now we're so close. I mean, it's like, well, I mean, yeah, but like, I mean, there's a difference because when you say things like, you know you're wrong and then you apologize. She's like, yeah, I've never done that. I've never been wrong. Yeah, yeah, when you're wrong, you acknowledge that you're wrong. She's like, no, mm-mm. I've never been wrong in a fight with you. I'm so sorry you're going through stuff. She's like, yeah, well, Angie's not even admitting she's wrong. But you know what? Maybe I'll let her apologize. But it will never be the same.

1:02:00Ronnie Karam: And Kwai's like, well, I don't know Angie really well. But you know what? I think that she really loves you. I can see you. She was waving around to Twizzler. and she called you a salad person and then she threw a fork.

1:02:16Ben Mandelker: She only walks on one side of poles.

1:02:19Ronnie Karam: Yeah. I'm pretty sure you guys are sisters.

1:02:24Ben Mandelker: So now they're eating their food or whatever and eating the accoutrements and Kwa is like, what was that? A coochie? What? Coochie what? I'm so wacky. I'm Kwa. I'm Kwa.

1:02:38Ronnie Karam: The pride in your stupidity. The pride. Just kidding. It's like, a coochie mark. No, Kwai. So Kwai's like, well, if I could give you any constructive criticism as someone who's opened basically nothing ever, you need some, like, fabric in here because, like, it's really hard to hear.

1:03:03Ben Mandelker: Well, thank you. And on that note, I have to go because I have to go to a child's birthday party. And so Kwai gets up just as food arrives, and she's like, oh, I want to go, but also free food. What do I do? So she, like, piles them into her mouth, and she's like, bye, guys. And Marissa's like, huh, well, I think it's ill-mannered. She could have stayed for dinner and then gone to the birthday for dessert for a piece of birthday cake. Or, you know, it's a choice. A friend usually, a friend to everyone, is a friend to no one, especially toddlers.

1:03:42Ronnie Karam: Like when she does her hand flip, like, Well, you might want to swallow the food before you walk out. So now Kawhi's going to get it. I was like, sorry, everybody, but I got to drive to Provo for some gummy sharks. Is it Provo? I only know that from Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. They're like, you don't even love them. It's not like that. You love them Provo.

1:04:14Ben Mandelker: Well, either way, we, I don't know. It's just all like lots of, it's just like very, like it's all this, it's like AI. So it's like AI slop. They live in AI slop. AI slop.

1:04:28Ronnie Karam: So we go to Whitney's house and, oh gosh, they haven't surprised Brittany. What's her name?

1:04:33Ben Mandelker: They definitely have not surprised Brittany yet. Bobby. Brittany has been sitting.

1:04:37Ronnie Karam: Brittany has been surprised by just never coming back on the show again. I know. She has been fired, I think, and no one said anything. She's been quiet quit.

1:04:46Ben Mandelker: I know. I think so. Well, they all were like, you did too much at the Jupiter party and like enough with Brittany. But when you say like, you know, Brittany hasn't been surprised yet, I feel like it's really sad because I do have a vision of Brittany spending a day walking into rooms being like, and this one will be a group of people willing to want to say surprise to me. And she opens the door like, ah! Oh, okay.

1:05:08Ronnie Karam: I think Brittany is in a constant state of surprise. She just looks very surprised.

1:05:12Ben Mandelker: She's like ready for her surprise party.

1:05:15Ronnie Karam: What about me? So Bobby comes in, she gets her car, she starts freaking out, as does every concerned driver. And then Kawhi comes in, I don't know, I was making small talk. But then Heather's like, well, knowing what Whitney and Justin are going through that nobody else knows, holding this secret as her daughter, Bobby, gets a Ford Bronco. I'm really a good person.

1:05:45Ben Mandelker: So the kids are all dancing because they've all put creamer into their Dr. Pepper.

1:05:53Ronnie Karam: God, those were the days. Church creamers. Oh, my God. The only reason. I would love to go to church every Sunday because after they had, like, coffee in the little coffee room or the parents talked, and my chunky little ass would go get every little creamer, me and my sister would be like... Cracked out on creamers.

1:06:14Ben Mandelker: So then they start to corner Kwai to find out how Meredith's thing was. And Heather's like, so how was Meredith? What was the sisterhood like over there? and Kawhi's like, oh, it was gorgeous. A lot of accoutrements, you know? And Angie's like, was it like a party? And she's like, no, it wasn't a party. And then they cut to Meredith on the DJing. And like my favorite thing, I don't think I've ever seen Mary dance before. Did you guys notice that? It was like the backstroke. She was up there. She was going like this. She was literally like...

1:06:57Ben Mandelker: All right. I closed my ring with that one. That was hard.

1:07:04Ronnie Karam: So Heather's like, well, I was invited. Sorry, but I said no. I have to go be a good friend to somebody who might be getting divorced, but we're not talking about it yet. Vroom, vroom, Floyd Bronco. Am I right?

1:07:16Ben Mandelker: And then, okay, was anyone else amused by it? This is actually my favorite part of the episode. Heather says that she was invited. And then we have a flashback to Meredith and Heather for no explained reason at a blacksmith. Yes. What the? What? And they were hammering like at an anvil. Well, as long as we're here doing iron work, I'd like to invite you to my caviar den called Perhaps.

1:07:46Ronnie Karam: So nice. She's like, but I can't go because I've got to go to the thing. And she's like, hmm. I completely understand.

1:07:59Ben Mandelker: You can't just give us Meredith Marks ironworking with no explanation. Next week she'll be blowing glass.

1:08:10Ronnie Karam: And there are so many things that Meredith just won't do. I mean, even at the dinner, like this last thing that they were at, Meredith just comes in late, and then she's like, she doesn't say anything, but you get her to a blacksmith, and she's like.

1:08:26Ben Mandelker: What was happening there?

1:08:31Ronnie Karam: So, Brahman's like, well, I wasn't invited either. I heard the party. Oh, this is totally crazy. I kind of like. Well, I am sure Meredith is loving the fact that Mary and I are at odds right now. That is why she didn't invite me And Bronwyn's like Why am I the one not invited to places I mean these women are terrible to me I should be the one

1:08:54Ben Mandelker: I'm so mad I might put on jeans So Then we go back to Meredith's lounge And Meredith is like We're going to have so much fun And we'll be able to come down here To perhaps And then go off to premiere Perhaps in premiere Here, there you go.

1:09:13Ronnie Karam: It's P squared. This is going to be great. This is going to be so great having a business right down the street from Meredith. I'm going to go pee. Take my fucking mic off right now. Go get a fucking whore. Who is a whore if our fucking family is whoring? Lisa is about to lose her mind. I don't care. I'm so excited. And then we go back to Bromwell and she's like, you know this is killing the both on the inside. So then

1:09:43Ben Mandelker: Whitney and Kwai sit down with the group and Angie's like, well, we were just getting caught up on Meredith's event and Kwai's like, well, Angie, I talked to Mary and she did tell Robert Sr. what happened and basically yeah, you're out. You're done. She's not going to, no, it's over for you.

1:10:01Ronnie Karam: You're blocked. I am sick about it. I don't know what to do and they're like, well, you're blocked. so the apologies she's like I am blocked I am blocked and you just see Angie trying not to wig out like I have been blocked on a phone

1:10:17Ben Mandelker: but actually Mary earlier in the episode Mary's like I will never talk to her again but she's actually not as mad as that maybe because she's saying that now she's at a place where she can hear an apology and she'll be okay with hearing it but she's like but I also don't know how I'm going to react afterwards I'm like, you'll probably call her a bobblehead. And I'm okay with that.

1:10:40Ronnie Karam: Then I say spare us. I say spare us all just until you're ready because it's too much for me to take these two fighting. I don't like it and I don't want to see it. And I watch Housewives. Usually I'm like, yes! But when it comes to like, you were mean to my dead son stuff, I'm like, no, please no. We were just watching Meredith as a blacksmith. Can we go back? I know. I mean, for Christ's sake. So then Mary's like, maybe I'll forgive her, but I will at least talk to her while, you know, my cousins clean my house. Probably my cousins. So then we go back to Whitney's, and Kwai's like, well, I know that you care about her.

1:11:17Ronnie Karam: I was just talking about how you threw salad in a fork and said something about salads and twirlers. That's friend love. Well, I thought we were best friends. I cannot believe I am blocked.

1:11:29Ben Mandelker: Oh, wow. And she's like, I feel like Mary believes that my response was how I feel in my heart. But that's not true. What my heart feels is tzatziki.

1:11:42Ronnie Karam: And that brings us to the end of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

1:11:46Ben Mandelker: Thank you, Dallas. Thanks for coming out on a Thursday night. We loved seeing you all. Dallas, thank you so much. We'll catch you next time we're here. We love you guys. Good night, everyone. Good night.

1:11:56Ronnie Karam: Bye. Bye. Bye.

1:12:01Ronnie Karam: We doing everything. We doing everything. I do it! We'

1:12:11Khaled!!

1:12:11Ben Mandelker: Yeah! Hypocrisy and bullshit. Bullshit. Bullshit. Hypocritity and does the state Çünkü przygotility. B Kirke, pull haha.çeiyet Winkar Funkes котором. I'm bored. I'm bored. I'm bored. I'm bored. Hypocrisy and bullshit. Hypocrisy and bullshit. Hypocrisy and bullshit. Watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. We're adamant about Adam Nerzer. Ain't no thing like Alison King. Our way is the Amber way. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's Always Automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp.

1:13:07Ronnie Karam: Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila. She's a Daniela. Itchles. We never miss her call. It's Diane Call. Big yay. It's Emily Gauthier. Erin McNicholas. She

1:13:18Ben Mandelker: don't miss no trick-a-less. Hala Nagila Weber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. It's no BS.

1:13:25Ronnie Karam: We love Hugo ES. Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch. She's our pal-a-ger. It's Karen Gallagher.

1:13:32Ben Mandelker: She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock.

1:13:35Ronnie Karam: Kristen the Piston Anderson. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy is Maisie McHenry. Come again? We're obsessed with Margaret O 'Halloran. Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the berg. I love-a-ya, Olivia Williamson. She's the lady of the house. It's Rachel Sherouse. She's not the bottom. She's Rachel Topper. Yes, we canna. It's Sadana.

1:13:59Ben Mandelker: Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge.

1:14:04Ronnie Karam: Don't get mixed signals. We love Signy. Darn Skippy. It's Tippi. And our super premium sponsors. She's VVIP. It's Amanda V.

1:14:13Ben Mandelker: Somebody get us 10 cc's of BetsyMD.

1:14:16Ronnie Karam: We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O 'Neill. Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Hogle your horses, it's Christine Hogle Don't get salty with Christine Pepper Can't have a meal without the Emily Sides

1:14:31Ben Mandelker: Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall Nothing can take the placing of Jason We got our wish, it's Jen Plish My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo Let's get savage with Laura Wildman In the study with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Barron She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy Always killin' it, it's Lola Alkalani Roger that, it's Marlis Rogers

1:14:58Ronnie Karam: The incredible edible Matthews sisters She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud She's our princess, it's Rebecca Prince

1:15:10Ben Mandelker: She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke

1:15:12Ronnie Karam: We cannot tell a lie, it's Sarah Talison Yes we canna, it's Savannah

1:15:17Ben Mandelker: Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony We have no notes Shelby Walter. Please don't stop at Soli and Pop. Let's take off with Tamla Plain. Strike a pose at Tori Rose.

1:15:29Ronnie Karam: She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar. We love you guys.

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