#2896 Next Gen NYC S1E3: Father Figure

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2:12What happens when there's so much that crap ends?

2:42is Dari a tour. We are having our big finale at the Fonda Theater in Hollywood, California. It's going to be very exciting. We're going to be recapping the Valley. Will we have a special guest? Who knows? Maybe. We can't say. But it's going to be fun. And we hope you all are there. So go get your tickets. Go to watchacrappens.com and ticket links are there. And join us. It's going to be fabulous. Thanks to everyone who has come out and seen us this year on our various cities and stops. We've had a blast getting back out on the road. It's our first North American tour in two years. And so it was so, so, so, so, so fun.

3:23And, um, you know, happy to be doing it, closing it out in Hollywood tomorrow. So there's that. Then over on Patreon, we are chugging away with our love Island coverage, which has been so fun. The, the season is, is wild and we're having a great time recapping it every day. So go check that out. patreon.com slash watch for crappins. Those recaps are up basically every day that we're doing recaps here. And also we have crappins on demand where you can watch us and not just listen to us. So there's a whole world of crappins out there on Patreon and we want you to participate in it and enjoy it. So that is that.

3:57And now today it is time to talk about next gen New York City. Oh my God. Wait, Ronnie. Oh, oh, actually before we start that, there's some very big news. Ronnie, i don't know if you heard this tell me if you stop me if you heard this um charlie like texted me and was like oh my god like um want to go have some pizza tonight unless i'm already at home with your sister and we're like having sex can you believe it can you believe that charlie did that i cannot believe you oh i thought you were talking about the actual news which is that charlie filed for bankruptcy in 2023 when he only had$1 ,500 in his bank account.

4:37And then Dame Dash is broke too. He's $20 million in debt. He also had$20 million in IRS stuff and his kid got evicted from her apartment. So while these fuckers, well, not Ava, she's done nothing wrong. But like while Charlie is acting like, oh, these TV you know, you guys are so used to being on TV. These reality kids are such trash. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Keep going. Keep going. These people are feeding your asses now. So let's get a little bit of respect to a Zolciak. And I've never said that before in my life. Respect to a Zolciak. This is what I never thought I would hear myself saying, but I've said it.

5:12Respect the Zolciak. Yeah, he is awful. And now it's like he was already awful. And now he also, you can also add a unrepentant. Is it too far to say racist? But I'm going to say microaggressor. either way he is just he's a dick and he's just getting worse and worse and he's like unappealing and now on top of that you're broke too so like you can't be all those things you know yeah fucker so this was also the episode that i officially fell in love i mean i've loved the show since it started i've we've really liked both of us have really liked it but this is the one where i was like oh no this show's great this is this is the one that solidified it for me i died laughing and then all of the other stuff was really good.

5:59Riley's just handling herself so well. I fucking love Riley. I never saw that coming. I mean, I didn't dislike Riley before, but they made it look like she has no lines. She's like the whole season. I'm loving this show. I love this show. I can't believe how much I love this show. I want to marry this show. I'm going to marry it. I'm not at love yet, and here's the reasons why. I think we are spending too much time with the parents. I understand that the parents are like the hook for this show, that these are the children of stars. But the truth is this show is at its best when it just focuses on the main cast.

6:32So this is like two weeks in a row where like the second half of the show has been significantly more compelling because the second half is when the kids are all just hanging out and doing things. And like it actually bothered me a little bit that the show, you know, early on in the show, we have this kind of like quick recap of this crazy night out that they all had. I'm like, I want to see that. Why are you making me sit through this awful scene of Seth trying out his like motivational speaker thing. Oh my God, I could not stand it. But it was also like, A, it was cringey. And I know that's the point.

7:04But also it's like, it wasn't authentic. Like it was, this is, it was like stupid to me. I would much rather spend my screen time watching these kids talk with each other. Cause that to me is so entertaining. And I think Bravo has to like, it's like, we get it. We understand they've got famous parents. Let's just like start to like sunset them. because there was just too much Seth on this episode. Can we stop talking about, like, first of all, that is senior abuse. You're talking about sunsetting people like a science fiction movie, like turning them into Soylent Green? No. And I will not stand for this slander.

7:36I like it. I love the Seth scene. And to me, it was very realistic because, you know, that thing of like, I'm going to talk to your friend. I mean, that's happened to me. And it's like the most awkward thing ever for the person whose dad or mom is doing it. My mom went into school one time and was like, who's bullying you? She went in and told off everybody in school, which as an adult, I'm like, what a badass. But as a kid, I was like, oh, my God. And she's still to this day like, well, I went in there and I told those kids off. And I'm like, and it kind of ruined a lot at that age. But I also like it because I was the kid who hated hanging out with the kids.

8:09So I was always hanging out with the adults. So I'm still like that. I'm still like, wow, I get to hang out with the adults. But then I get to see what all the kids were talking about, most likely behind my back, while I was like watching their moms drink franzi and talk shit about each other. So I don't know. It's all working for me. Yeah, I mean, look, I think the show is almost there. I'm just saying I like the cast so much that I just want to spend more time with them and I would like to see their crazy night out. I want to see what happened when they went to this club and Georgia lost her phone.

8:39I would just rather spend more time with that than like Seth and Brooks golfing or Seth and Charlie having drinks or whatever or Gia and Teresa talking about making pizza. Like those scenes were entertaining, but I didn't find them to be compelling. And so I just want more of our children on the show front and center doing vapid things. And if there are adults, I want them to be dismissive adults. That's fair. You know what? Tomato, tomato. That's okay. You say you want more compelling? I say stop making this show so life-changing for me, especially the scenes with Teresa, Seth, and, you know, Charlie's dad hating on Charlie.

9:16I love it. I do. That's well, that's okay. Cause he's dismissive. Like, again, I'm okay with the dismissive adults, you know, put it in the Kelly Catrone, put in like, uh, I'm not gonna say Anna Wintour, but like, you know, I don't need Dana Wintour. Why wouldn't you say that? Does she even have children? Are they snowing? Like, I would love, are they icicles? I would love to meet her icicle children. They're the little mushrooms from Super Mario. They all have her hair cut. I'm in. Okay, so speaking of Icicle Children, Ariana opens the show, of course, because they're still doing this whole like, oh my God, a Zolciak in New York City.

9:56Isn't this wacky? So that's how we open it. And Ariana's monologue is like, I'm in New York City. I'm like a kid in a candy shop. I am honestly in awe of my life and the fact that God has blessed me to even be here. I don't even mind the smell of urine and poop. I mean, look, I was raised in the Beerman household with 15 other children pissing everywhere. okay I love the loudness I'm used to sirens I love how fast-paced it is well I love how she slides slid that in I'm used to sirens my mom calls the police on Croy every other weekend there's just so much culture and there's like so many different kinds of people I get this feeling here that's like just gives me chills I like walk down the streets it's like how I imagine Alicia Keys singing Empire State of Mind would be you know loud annoying off key screeching.

10:42Could you please have Alicia Keys? Shut up. I'm trying to do a play here. You walk down the street and there's a Broadway diva making microaggressions against Alicia Keys and Audra O'Donnell. Like, this is the life. Please be quiet. I shouldn't have to kneel by this. Oh my God. Empire State of... Empire State of... Shut up. How's that going for you, boy? So she's like, yeah, I mean, like, oh, my God, a bird pooped on me. Is bird poop supposed to be good luck? Because that's incredibly concerning that bird poop is supposed to be good luck. I don't know if I like this city anymore. I don't believe in these omens.

11:22I believe in Jesus. You know who made that bird poop? The Lord did. Whitney Port. I mean, Whitney Rose, my favorite quote of hers. I think that is my favorite Whitney Rose quote of all time. You know who did that? The Lord did. so we go to Ava sitting on a park bench she's talking to Brooks on the phone and he's like oh my god Riley invited everyone out and took us around Brooklyn and then Ariana and Hudson came but you could tell Charlie wasn't interested and they felt like disrespected by the way that he was telling them because he wasn't very nice and it was like right after he told me that he wanted to be in a room with my sister my sister and he was like so you won't be mad if I fuck your sister, your sister, your sister, the disrespect.

12:12Girl, it is episode three. Move it on. Like, Brooksy, I love you, but you need to move it along. This is like definitely a kid from the Meredith Marks school of, how dare you talk about my bathtub? Yeah, he has really streamed this one out. And it's just not compelling enough, but it is good. It's, it's funny in its own way, just because he is so fixated on it that like, Every time he brings it up, just when you think it's over, he'll find someone else. He'll find like a hot dog vendor. Like he'll go up. We'll just go see the mayoral race with like Calmo and the other guy. And like, I would like, I have a question for the candidates.

12:49If Charlie ever texted you and said he wanted to sleep with your sister, how would you feel about it? I'll start with you, Calmo. He's just going to find anyone to talk to about this. Yeah. So Ava's like, I literally feel like a PR girl because like, you know, I hear things about what my client's done. Now I got to go do damage control control. I'm like, well, you know what? At least you're giving yourself a job and you're made up. You're like fake medical insurance after all. Health care. She's like, I mean, I don't even know about Ariana because I like haven't met her. Like, I don't know her vibes or whatever.

13:26so then we see the flashbacks of ariana being like hi nice to meet you and charlie being like oh yeah it's crazy how fast you can get a read on someone oh probably doesn't even know what crypto is ever heard of blockchain loser so now we see ariana hudson walking down the street again and she is still doing her like i'm constantly walking around the city with swamp ass and i should probably have just kept that to myself but god i love the city it's like alicia key's always saying well but tomorrow we're gonna go to soho for george's event and i'm excited for it and we're gonna see your favorite person hudsy todson charlie charlie's like i'm not gonna condition my hair today i'm gonna have anger split ends these split ends were brought to you by zaxby's chicken today my look is brought to you by tears for fear circa 1984.

14:20so charlie is meanwhile go back to Charlie now he's in the apartment with Ava and she's like so I heard some tea about last night and I heard you were still making comments about Chloe and stuff to Brooks he's like yeah I was like doing it jokingly I mean he doesn't really even care no he does care but he's like not good at confrontation so he's probably like laughing but he feels uncomfortable how many people does Brooks need to actually confront Charlie about this because last episode was all about like I don't want to have a mouthpiece. And now it's been a fifth person commissioned to do this.

14:55Girl, it's more than a mouthpiece at this point. It's like a retainer. You never take it out of your mouth. It's constantly there. Unless you eat. So, yeah. And I think it's a little much, too. Because I think Charlie's just fucking with Brooks. I mean, Charlie's an asshole, look. I'm not going to stand up for Charlie. But Brooks knows that Charlie's an asshole and he's fucking with him. But I think Charlie's like, why are you trying to make this a fucking storyline, brah. But then instead of just backing off, he just keeps making it worse, you know? So what can you do? You know what, Charlie?

15:26I'm trying to stand up for you because I know how difficult it is being a wealthy, white, blonde, young person in America. There's no opportunities for you. Nobody gives you any chances. So I'm trying to stand up for you, but you're making it very, very difficult, Charlie, okay? Please, let's feel something for the straight, white, young, rich male in this country. It's hard to look like a scars guard without any of the perks of being a scars guard. So he does have, he does carry that cross. He's a SARS guard, you know? Which I know is a real thing. He's a SARS guard, not a SARS guard. Sorry, you know?

16:03SARS. Yeah, so now Charlie and Dylan are talking and Charlie is like, Hudson, like, so yeah, the other night, we had this crazy this drama. It's like, Hudson comes up and And he's like, yo, I feel like there was some disrespect for some animosity towards us or something. And I was like, dude, you want to fight? Like, let's go fight. I can hire someone to fight you. And then we see a flashback of us and be like, you want to fight? No. And Ava's like, wait, you want to take this around the corner? Who says that? Yeah. Like, you want to take it? He's like, I'm so city that I, like, offer to fight outside around the corner so we don't disturb any businesses.

16:41Well, guess what? There's more businesses around the corner. He fell into the corner trap It's called the corner store So no matter where you fight, there's gonna be a business So Ava's like, bro Bottega fight, it's on the corner Hey, I'll compromise with you And I'll do it on the corner

17:03So Ava's like, I mean, you said you want to fight And he's like, yeah, but I was like, around the corner, right? And then Ariana was like, by his side or some shit I would have fought him, for sure And Dylan's like, yeah, you guys want some weed? They're like, we're cameramen. We can't smoke your weed, sorry. It's like, okay, yeah. But like, guys, guys usually like, if they fight, like, that's when they become best friends. Because like, one time I got in this fight and I like wailed on this dude. And then he was like, bro, I can't wait to jerk off to you on fucking OnlyFans. I was like, fuck yeah.

17:36I get 15 bucks a month from that fucking dude. Fucking awesome. I said, dude's all right, bro.

17:46yeah man that's how bros become friends we just punch each other a little bit with the fist and with the dicks so then um dylan is like yeah it was awesome so the producer's like what about your face like don't you make money off your face he's like no i don't make money off this thing it's my body we see more shots of him shirtless no it's your face anybody can work out you've got the double punch. You know, you've got the face and the working out. So you're making money off your face. Don't mess up your face. And I don't even believe him that he beat the shit out of some guy and had blood all over his hands.

18:19Dylan, nobody believes you. Well, we now go to a driving range where Seth and Brooks are playing golf and Seth is like, get in the hole, get it hole. Oh my God. My dad would always be taking me golfing growing up. And like, that was like one side of it. The other side was that he would send me to like golf intensives. He said, golf intensives? I mean, it's called golf lessons. Is that what you're talking about? Is what Gen Z calls lessons? Intenses? Yeah, like intensives. Like you took me to golf camp and he's like, you call golf camp a golf intensive? What the hell, Brooks? Are you getting any up the ass?

18:59Let's talk about it. You swallow. Let's talk about your sex life. You have a boyfriend. You play golf. He fuck you up the butt hey you ever you ever done nosies that's where you fuck someone's nose you ever done it i read about it i saw it on tiktok i read about it on tiktok it was a tiktok but it had words on it do kids do that god i'm so glad to get kids back to reading so let's get back to you know you like that it's like dad gone i actually i had to go these awful intensives because they were intense and i actually won an award it was a unique award that they created just for me because I accidentally hit a squirrel with my golf ball, which honestly, that shouldn't have even been an award.

19:38I need to unpack that in therapy. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial. You know those pieces in your closet, Ronnie, that you find yourself wearing on repeat? The sweater that goes with everything, the perfect pair of pants, or the tee is somehow always reach for first. Those are the pieces that make getting dressed easy, and that's what Quince does best. Quince focuses on high-quality wardrobe staples made with premium materials like 100 % Mongolian cashmere, organic cotton, and merino wool. The styles are timeless, versatile, and designed to become the dependable pieces you reach for day after day.

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22:12Final pricing depends on program selection. Results based on a January 2026 analysis of$14 ,203. 203 Noom GLP-1 RX program members who logged weight over a 40-week period. Higher app engagement was associated with greater weight loss at 16 weeks. So then we see the boyfriend who's really cute. So Brooks has a boyfriend now and they're cleaning the apartment. And Brooks is like, I'm going to clean this thing. He's like standing on the counter. Brooks is also wearing like a shirt made of like seatbelts. I'm a fashion designer. I don't know how to use a sewing machine, but I know fashion. So Seth's like, yeah, you know, Cade and I met in Park City.

22:58I was out with my mom. Oh, no, this is Brooks. He's like, Cade and I met in Park City. I was with my mom. And he was like, oh, my God, icon queen. And so we're basically together now. He buys me dinner, but I have to sign the check. Meredith Marks put hearts on it. It's the customer copy. He takes it home and just pretended my mom signed it. I'm like, it's his kink. Yeah, he lives between like Austin and LA. So I'm like always trying to get him to come to New York, which is hard because when he's not in those cities, he's in Salt Lake City, just like following my mother around and being like, icon, mother, mother, icon.

23:37So anyway, sometimes he comes to New York City and he like vacuums my silverware for me. Yeah, last time he came to visit, he got a hotel room and then at the front desk, They said, are you Mr. Basically Meredith Marx's son now? Okay, we've got your room ready for you. It was romantic. How's your sex life? That's like not something I need to talk to my dad about. He's like, but you talk about your mom about it? Yeah, because she's an icon. I want a deeper emotional connection. Seriously, I want to be like a mother. That's next level for a father is to be the mother. The dad becomes the mom, son.

24:17That's how it goes. Okay, tell me, what about your body count? Is that high? You got a high body count? What about your boyfriend? He got a high body count? He's like, where did you hear body count? He's like, yeah, I just learned it. It was TikTok. You know what? I just want to make sure you know before you give your heart completely, it's mutual. Are you just a body count on a counter of bodies? Come on. You fuck the bodies. All right, it's body count. How much anal does that take? dad stop do you swallow a load and that's on your body is a handy a body count tell me i need to know what sort of hair does he have because i've been told by someone in my wife's circle that you can have hair that indicates your body count he's like well speaking of body count chloe went on a date with charlie and charlie said this thing about chloe he's like oh jesus god i haven't even been here and I've heard about this.

25:11What is Chloe's body count? Dad, that's not the point. Does she like anal? Dad. But he texted me after and he said, like, come meet, like, like, let's meet up unless I'm at my place with your sister. He's like, wow, wow. She needs to know who she's signing up for with a guy who behaves like this. And it's like, well, that's, is that how you behave? He's like, at that age? Like a little 16 year old? Yeah. I mean, because it was entertaining. I used to be like that, but he's 29. Okay, maybe not that age. And he's like, yeah, you were married with three kids, dad. He goes, yeah, but I'm always going to be immature.

25:46That's the point, son. You know, those are immature moments. You know, I relate to that. God, I love this kid. God, I want to see if he's got some extra dad, need a dad. He needs a dad, right? I bet he'll talk about it. You know, I'm taking this kid to lunch. Yeah, he probably hasn't swallowed loads, right? All right, I won't bring that up. Body count. Lunch with Charlie. I'm going to bring him a cake with Whitney Rose's boobs on it and see what he does let's see if he's truly like me I think I know how it's going to turn out he's like dad I can handle it I'm 24 you don't need to go talk to people can you because it's episode 3 I mean I think in your time it's like the third week you're talking it's been a month of you talking your dad needs to step in I'm for it yeah and basically Seth decides that he's gonna he's like wow it seems like Charlie doesn't have a deep relationship with his dad so I'll be his dad now which I think is actually a bit like presumptuous to do that even to someone like Charlie so now we go over to New Jersey and Gia's like hi mom how are you doing she's like ah I want to go get my chucolina laser and I got like a Brazilian down there but they didn't numb my butthole and I was like ouch out oh wow wow wow and she was like next time we'll numb your butthole okay I was like okay I never did but bleach my butthole before I never did my butthole before but I had a Brazilian do my butthole let me get no sense oh my god mom like i'm for sure moving out but like it's so difficult because like new jersey has like a turnpike and then you go like into the turnpike and it could be flooded with water and he's like i could enjoy there i love living here though because you know we got a pizza oven we got like a floor we got like mops it's like it's like perfect here she goes also So there's no taxes in New Jersey.

27:34And then we see it on screen. It says, no, this U.S. Jersey has the second highest average property taxes. You guys just don't pay your taxes. But there are, in fact, taxes. Yeah. Some of us need to stop listening to our parents because that is such a Joe Jude Ice thing to say. No taxes here. There's no taxes in Jersey. Do they have no sales tax? What is she talking about? Maybe she meant taxis. I don't know. So she's like, so this weekend. We don't got waxes in Germany and in Jersey. That's why that's why my dad's got to get shaved every day by my line. So this weekend, I'm going to have everyone over for a pool party, which is just what cool kids from New York City want to do.

28:17Go to Jersey for a pool party when they could go to Soho House instead. Oh, yeah. I'm so upset. I'm not going to be there for it. I know. But I'm going to make pizzas with everyone. So, you know, I'm going to get the dough from Pizza Cucina. Oh, my God. Did you numb the pizza cochineal first? I never did that before. No, ma. Not your... I got a Brazilian on my cochineal. Ma, you're getting confused. You're getting confused, ma. Oh, sorry. I met my chucolita. Have you been to Chucolita pizza cochineal yet, though?

28:50Okay, everybody who's wondering. All the Jersey people out there in the turnpike slamming on their steering wheels. Here's the law. You're right. New Jersey has some specific tax policies related to clothing and groceries, but it's not entirely accurate to say there's no tax in Jersey. Jersey does have a sales tax currently at 6.625 % on most tangible personal property and certain services. However, there are exemptions for several categories, most clothing and footwear, most food sold as groceries, prescription medications, and certain other items, including Chocolina waxing, agricultural supplies, and coochie waxing, which is different than Chocolina waxing.

29:32So there you go. Yeah, we all learned something now. So she, Gia's going to make pizza. She's going to have a psychic that's going to come. and like Teresa is like oh yeah by the way no one on the trampoline why do you have a trampoline then the trampoline is made for these parties it's made for pool parties I love it it's like trampolines for adults only like what so yeah it's there and she's like by the way there are cameras outside so I'm gonna be watching yous so yeah big party about to come so now we see Charlie walking down the street and Gia texts him about the pool party and he's like, cool, dope, whatever.

30:13You know, he's absolutely disgusted with the idea of going to New Jersey to like Gia's pool party. He's like, I guess I got to do it for the show, but he doesn't want to hang out with Jersey girls. Okay, so now we get Charlie going to Casa Bond with his mom, Liz, and the mom's boyfriend, Ivor. Oh my God, these two. So Charlie sits down with these crazy people and he's like, wow, I haven't seen you since like Mother's Day, I guess. And I was like, do you guys in America take Mother's Day seriously though? Do you? Ugh, disgusting. We don't celebrate mothers where I'm from. Across the pond we say, oh, there's a pond.

30:51I'll drown you in it. You insufferable wench who birthed me. That's just how we do it there. She goes, well, you know, it just happened to be that I last saw last time on Mother's Day because I just happened to be in town. So I said, oh, it's Mother's Day. Let's have lunch. I thought, you know, I almost forgot that I had this son and I thought, well, I guess I might as well do something motherly once in a while. So I threw him a boat and I was like, come on, Peter, let's go to lunch. He said, my name's Charlie. I said, well, whatever your name is, I got to do this once every five years. Am I right?

31:21God, you went out with a whole family or whoever just happens to be around. Sounds disgusting. He's such a ghoul, this Ivar. So what a weird fucking dude. And she's like, well, I mean, everybody's still speaking to me as of now. So those are the people that got to come. and Charlie tells us his sad, sad story. His parents got divorced when he was three-ish. He grew up with his mom until he was 10, but then his mom was like, gross, I'm artsy. So she got rid of me, you know? She gave me home-cooked meal stuff, but then she just got sick of me, so my dad took custody because she wasn't really feeling up to it.

31:58You know, the first time I sold all my jelly beans and bought crypto with it, she said to your rat, fucking brat. And, you know, it got more factored when I needed her assistance with my dad. And I was like, dad's mean. Then she didn't do shit about it. And that's when I knew mama doesn't care. Pity the child that lost his mama. Yeah, you're still an asshole, Charlie. I feel nothing. I'm going to translate Charlie's story, which is she tried to raise Charlie. He was out of control, spoiled brat. Kept getting kicked out of boarding school and shit. Kicked out of boarding school, private school, private school, private school.

32:33She couldn't deal with it anymore. So she's like, guess what? you now have to live with your dad because he's more stern than I am. So then he was raised by his dad and he's still a little shit. And then, um, anytime he was trying to get his way, he would make his pitch to the mom and sell it in one way. And then he would go tell the dad, like this mom said, it's okay. And then dad would call mom and she'd be like, I never said that, that little fucking shit. And dad's like, you're busted. That's what this story is. Okay. I don't believe any of his spin whatsoever. I don't either. And Charlie's like, it was abuse, man.

33:02It was abuse. It was child abuse. So don't believe him and he's like yeah, I mean like you mom like you don't alienate us the way dad does She's no, it's not alienation. You know, it's a send to voicemail is what I call it. It's always worked for me as a mother You know She's like, you know, it's so nice cuz you know We we used to go out years ago and now we're all back together So I can see how the drugs are affecting your body now all these years later And he's just talking about Ivar so I was like, oh yes, we same story It's like we met 40 years ago in Dallas of all places. He's like, yeah, I was dating Jean-Michel Basquiat, remember that?

33:42He's like, uh, why did your accent turn French? Because his name was Jean-Michel Basquiat, come on, come on, Charlie, do you remember? You know, every time Ivar shows up at a cafe with an ascot on and tries to pretend like he's an artist, I just like to remind him that my ex was Basquiat. My best friend was Debbie Harry. So good try, Ivar.

34:07And Ivar is like, yeah, well, your mom went out with my best friend, but he was too boring and she left him, even though he had a huge cock.

34:19Charlie's like, how do you know how big his cock? How are you not playing with your nipples while you die? He's like, teeth him out and like licking his lips. It's creepy, this guy. I know Charlie's like um Ivar how did you know how big your best friend's cock was he goes well there's always a hint of mint about us English men so I knew could you take one now I'm not even around you but I know you need one a hint of mint so Charlie's like um my mom fucked up in early youth but like she's been such a good mom like she's tried so hard to make up for it unlike my dad who continues to be a dick and open up old wounds And then we see a flashback to basically the dad saying like his sister was his favorite.

35:02I don't know. I think his dad's just a realist. I mean, it's just amazing. I remember you were just so intuitive as a child. And it's funny because Basquiat's not your father, but your life has grown up to resemble one of his paintings. And that's always really touched me, Charlie. You know, you're just so amazing, intuitive as a child. Always when I didn't want to speak to you, you would walk away. And it was just glorious. You know, I remember one day I was sick and I said to you, Charlie, you're going to have to make a peanut butter sandwich. And he said, I'll make you one, Mommy. I love you.

35:32You brought me a bottle of vodka and a straw, a little mirror with a razor on it. That was the only Mother's Day I'll ever need. Thank you. And just like that Basquiat, unlike that Basquiat painting that you look like, you have no inherent worth. Anyway, great seeing you again, love. I love that her best memory of Charlie Is that he made her a sandwich one time When she didn't feel like making dinner Seems like your acts of service Charlie Really quite amazing Whenever someone says describe your child I say he would always press the button on the elevator What a good thing Unfortunately it was a terrible sandwich So that was the moment I realized I had to give you over to your father So she's like So are you happy with where you are right now?

36:17That's a rhetorical question you obviously are miserable because we failed you as parents and he's like um well i'm at my point in my life where like i'm 29 right like turning 30 soon enough and it just would be nice if like i was maybe a little bit further along in like a career path oh well to be further along you have to start on one so there's that how about that yeah you might want to start you know and he's like dad's an asshole he doesn't give me emotional support like what the hell i don't get emotional support from Anwar. And she's like, well, Anwar didn't get emotional support because there was Gigi and then there was the other one.

36:51And Anwar's the other, other one. How do you think he feels? I'm not talking about the Hadids, mom. I'm talking about dad. Oh, right. No, it's not that he doesn't support you. He just doesn't like you, Charlie. All right. And in fairness to him, his skill set that he uses in business makes us all rich. So let's be grateful for dad. All right. You can hire somebody to hug you, Charlie. And I was like, I can do it. Hint of mint. Oh, wait. I want to show you something, Charlie. Before you start talking about career paths, I want to remind you that you can just be a lazy artist who coasts off his parents' money.

37:26Look, some pictures that you drew. I saved them. Look at these. And he's like, oh, yeah, I do remember them. And so you think for a moment, it'll be like, wow, imagine Charlie has like a hidden talent. Like he actually has raw artistry that he got from his mom who worked in the world of artistry. And we see the pictures. It's just like doodles of stick figures shooting each other. Absolutely brilliant. So good. He goes, wow. Oh my God, I do remember this. Is this dad that I'm drawing getting killed? Bullet through the head, knife through the head. That's funny as fuck. Wow. Yes. We call these basky knots.

38:01When I tell you, I died laughing at this. Where else are you going to get this? I brought pictures you drew of your father. Oh, yeah, that's the one where I stabbed him in the head. That's the one where I shot him five times. God, these are good. God, what a family. And then he says, hey, you know what? You know what I'm rewatching right now? Succession. And Ivar's like, oh, isn't it wonderful? Hint of Mint.com. And Charlie's like, yeah, I mean, if that guy isn't literally Anwar incarnate, I mean, my dad is the dad from that show. Just how badly, like, one of the songs wants his approval and how little he gives a fuck.

38:34I'm like, Charlie, I hate to break it to you. The dad is the hero on that show. It's the children who are the villains.

38:42You know no one roots for the kids on that show, right? I hope you really pay attention to the part where the dad comes in and says, I love you all, but you're not serious people. You're just not serious people. I hope you pay attention to the part where the children are insufferable for four seasons in a row. and no one likes them and cheers for their demise one of the only shows where everybody's like dying to know how it ends and actually hoping everybody gets killed it's like charlie's actually casting himself in the role of like jeremy strong like oh what an honor to be the jeremy strong character the only person yeah he's like yeah you know like like the kids there's that one kid who just wants him to love him but then he just rips him down he's like I don't want to shit talk dad too much because like god forbid I get cut off when this airs but he's really a vicious motherfucker sometimes yeah and guess what you're broke now so yes exactly looks like someone got cut off so now we go over to Brooks's apartment and Shy comes over so finally we're getting to like spend time with Shy who's in the poster in the front row of the poster Shy is like so I got introduced to the rest of the group through Dylan.

39:59And like, I have a full-time job. I'm an agent's assistant. And I spend most of my free time sewing. So, you know, like my mom dropped me off some curtains the other day. And then like, I put them up. And then I was like, no. And I took them down. And I made them into pants. And I'm wearing the pants right now. And he gets up and he shows us the pants. Babe, those are$10 IKEA sheer curtains. They're like, still obviously$10 IKEA sheer. I mean, congratulations on being able to sew. but I don't know. Better eye. Better eye. I did something similar. I really like him. I turned, there was a fitted sheet that I was going to throw out and instead I turned that into a pair of shorts and I was like, oh my god, this is so cool.

40:39I turned the fitted sheet into shorts and when I tell you, they are basically see-through. There's a difference between sheet material and like clothing material. Yeah. It doesn't always work out. So he's having to show Brooks how to sew because Brooks still doesn't really know. He's like, I got a new machine but I like it's like a thing and like you put a thing on a whatever could you do it he's like okay yeah I'll show you just put this on the bobbin and then thread the thing through he's like wow yeah I'm like really like I'm gonna like learn because like I'm a fashion designer and I want to be more than just like a one tracksuit wonder and then we see Jen Shaw being like um is that it is there like any other designs is that the only design what about me says the lady who now is in just a one track suit rotation no kidding that karma came quickly i wouldn't really rocks man that karma comes quickly i never thought about that now she's a one track suit wonder that's cool i also think it's hilarious that brooks is on like year four or five of his fashion designer journey and he's only like sitting down with his first ever sewing machine he's like okay what do i do it's like it's like at least like at least do this off camera at least learn about it how how a sewing machine works off camera yeah it should have taken a few weeks before the show started shooting and like come up with some stuff and had them there to be like look i'm a designer i've been doing this since my track suit you know yeah like how do you put a thread in the needle i mean he literally asked how to thread a needle girl shy is like why am i better at this than you i'm not supposed this is not my role on the show um so then now um riley shows up and shy is saying like riley is by far the most genuine and they just you know they love each other so uh then so shy is showing how to like how to use the sewing machine and he's like okay you just take the fabric and you move it forward like this ow I just got me and then he's like just kidding and Brooks is like oh my god like I literally almost died I thought you were like serious I thought you were I thought you died I thought like you died of sewing machine that was so scary I literally almost fell over in horror it was like the time Charlie texted me and said so he's like so are you still on your own phone bill are you on your parents and he's like no I'm on my parents right now um they were going to um switched me out, but then they saw I was still making pants out of drapes, and I wasn't ready.

43:13So it's actually a good move on my part. He's like, yeah, same. Like, second I have my own phone bell, I'm going to be like, that's adulting. Get a needle. Get a thread through a needle, Brooks. I know. Get to work, Cinderella. Commercials. Here comes one right now.

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45:48New members can start listening with a 30-day free trial at audible.com slash WWC. So Shai's like, yeah, I'm trying to get off my phone more. because like if we don't have phones we don't have a phone bill. Oh my god. That's like amazing. Yeah, that's like crazy. I was thinking like if I don't buy food then I won't eat it. So I just stopped buying food. Brooks, why are you eating the sewing machine? We should have talked about food. Ow! The meat will hurt but it's worth it. So Riley's like okay, I came over here to shoot a scene with you guys not watching Marvel about phone bills So guess what?

46:29Georgia lost her phone last night. She was like saying she was like, was going crazy without it. And she was like, so stressed. And when we went out, she couldn't communicate with anyone. Brooks like, wow, did I really miss that much when I went home? And she's like, yeah, it was a crazy. Wow. Okay. Everyone, America buckle up. Here comes a story. We went to an art gallery event that Georgia produced. Yeah. So you see a flashback and Georgia's like, yeah, So when I'm looking at R, I just kind of like, I feel like nothing sometimes. You know what I mean? That's like what art does to you. Yeah. I like invited people who I thought would be really interested in this event.

47:12So naturally there was a Zolciak there. And then we see the event and George said, where the fuck are Dylan and Charlie? So then George says, I really like Ariana and Hudson. so then I was like okay and then you know I have Charlie who's like my friend so he just immediately is like no I don't like them and he expects like unwavering loyalty all the time yeah and Ariana wants to squash the beef with Charlie you know she's like I hope this guy can keep his smaltic energy in his pants and calm down so we can just be friends so then we see the after party and she tells Charlie like let's backtrack and he's like sure I'd be welcome to that you know welcome to New York let's start over so um They just basically just wrap up that entire storyline for us.

47:58It's like, excuse you, like we're here. I was invested in this rivalry. How could you just like end it in a flashback? Because we've got something new now. So now we go to Georgia dancing at the after party. You just like, you know, dancing like artists do. Like our hands are in the air. It's like, what? Like I might as well be looking at art right now. I'm thinking nothing. And then dun, dun, dun. I left around 11. I don't really go to clubs, period. because I'd rather like sit on my bed on my iPad, like drawing needles, trying to figure out how to put that string through them. And so Charlie is giving Ariana and Hudson a group hug after they leave.

48:34And then Riley's like, wait, so Charlie and Dylan met up with some girls, which Georgia got really upset about. But Georgia was really under the influence. Cut to Georgia just being like, whoa, where's Charlie? Is Charlie even here? Is Charlie in that frame on the wall? What's happening? and then shy left early and then like charlie ditched me with georgia who still doesn't even have her phone and then we see charlie getting in this car and he's like wait why isn't riley calling me and then george is like what the fuck they just like fucking left me at this party how could i do this this was supposed to be the best party of my life this was like a marshmallow activation at the haribo store a premiere dj premiere candy i can't believe they'd leave so that's the drama george is mad now because she got left at a party so now we see charlie walking down the street carrying a skateboard he's like yeah i'm a skateboarder so i'm basically almost a 30 year old skateboarder so surely dad will love me soon i'm a real rebel like you're literally doing bart simpson to get your dad's love girl yeah so seth facetimes and he's like Charlie what's up brother?

49:42I wanted to reach out to see if you and I could get together or as the kids say hang I hear things about you that concern me Hashtag body count and I want to make sure you know There's a grown-ass man that cares about you so that way you don't have to crash out be so for real right now Charlie's like Okay, I guess we can get together. All right. You got it. Stay strong brother. Okay. Thanks. Talk to you up Bye-bye. Wait, do you guys say bye in a different way? Please tell me. I don't want to embarrass myself. Catch you later, alligator motherfucker in a trucker. That's right. That's you. See you soon, buddy.

50:20He's like, oh, awkward. So then we go to Seth and Charlie. Okay, so they have a lunch. And Seth's like, wow, you're taller than I thought you'd be, huh? Yeah, I'm real excited to you. The Charlie chat. Here we go. There a chocolate factory near? Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, what you thinking? Just kidding. All right, let's get some iced tea or Coke. Should we do some Coke? You got Coke? Cola. I mean, he's a kid. Are you a kid? You got Coke? You know, you order what you want. I'll go along with it. I'm a cool dad. Cool dad. Yeah. All right. Then just so you can feel comfortable with this whole scene we're shooting.

50:57I have three kids. He's like, I know. And I've always wanted to be like a life coach. so I thought I want you to be one of my first non-genetic clients on TV this will go great because Seth was doing this remember after their first season he's like hey everybody I'm a life coach and here's what you just got to do is follow my Instagram I'll give you life coaching skills all right these are ziploc bags let me tell you something you don't want something to get wet what do you do put it in your pocket what are you fucking an idiot no you put it in a ziploc bag make sure you grab it with two fingers and it zip locks.

51:32You get it? That's why they call it that. I never really got that until I actually concentrated on what it meant. Follow me, like, and subscribe for more good tips like this. Also, you know, give your wife a present every once in a while. Talk to you soon. Charlie's like, what I would rather be doing than having this meeting with Seth. I don't know, cutting my own dick off, sleeping, vomiting at my house, fucking Chloe, literally everything. And honestly, this is one of the few times I think I'm going to be on Charlie's side. So he's an asshole, but he makes me laugh at least I was talking to you Before to you and Chloe even hung out.

52:07I was talking to you. You know, I see myself in you man Like, you know, so I know how dudes think I get it. I get it, bro Okay, and the pride and joy of my life my daughter Okay, you have a connection going she's got low body count. You've got high body count Let's not find an average okay And whether it's going to be a body count transaction or something deeper or more meaningful, I don't know. Be so for real right now. Did I use that one already? You guys coupled up? You closed off? Like, what's going on with you two, huh? Come on. You give her fanny flutters? Just tell me where we're going here, brother man, bro ham.

52:49And he's like, I've been on one date with her. But I will say the level of familial involvement is a little more intense than I'm used to. And my mom's boyfriend just talked about her ex-boyfriend's huge dick. So just maybe reel it in a little bit. We are so back right now. I mean, you're right. And I have to say, it just sounded like you were objectifying Chloe a little bit, which is really my role, not your role. It's like, well, it wasn't anything crazy, I assure you. Well, you didn't say I'd love the opportunity to share sexual energy with your sister. You didn't say that? Because if you did not like to use that one.

53:27Definitely did not use that wording. It's nothing. I mean, like waking up together. I mean, come on. That was it. And he's like, oh, so was the F word even involved in it? And he's like, no, I would never call Brooks that. No, no. The body count one. Oh, I don't know. Did I say that? Maybe I did. You know what? Maybe I did. I don't know. Maybe. It's like, yeah, sounds like you're objectifying women, Charlie. OK, you know, to me, it's a bunch of noise. It sounds like something I might have said. Did you get a boner this morning? Did you play with it? What kind of porn did you watch? Huh? Was it like little people being tossed in bars?

54:02And just tell me the truth. I'm not getting a boner right now. Why are you staring at my boner? It's a tent. It's a tent in my pants. Oh, my God. Can we get a glass of water for this horny little goat? Hey, do you have a bathroom we can go into? Just to compare sizes, you know, just want to make sure we're really similar. I think I just really don't want you object to drive to find women unless it's in cake form and there's some boobs rising out of it in which case you can lick those that's okay anywho um you know Brooks you know tell me about what's going on with you and Brooks he's like well Brooks and I have spoken about this and I've apologized at least like three times now and like you know over text like okay well I'm gonna tell him dude I love Charlie he's very remorseful about it let's move the fuck on great teaching moment for them okay that's what we got that's what we gotta say right because the most important thing in relationships is authenticity sometimes you gotta cherish that relationship you put it in the ziploc bag and then you close it because did you see my video about how those clothes zip and lock okay the zip and zipper lock is for locks hold on a second news coming in news coming in your relationship is choking your relationship Okay, do not put human relationships in a Ziploc bag, okay?

55:13Life coaching lesson update. All right, don't do it. Kids die like this. This is how kids die. Do you know how many kids have been found in uptown Manhattan with Ziploc bags over their head dead? It's a crazy thing. That's why they need me, Charlie. Listen, I think you're a good guy. You got a boner. I got a boner. You went to Cornell. I got a boner. Tell me about Cornell. What was that like? He's like, I actually went to Emory and then NYU. Oh, so no, no Ivy league. Okay. Why am I trying to save this relationship? Damn it. I thought for sure there was Cornell in there. Okay. Well, great seeing you.

55:48He's like, yeah. And then I got a master's from NYU, you know, talent, restaurant marketing, shit like that. You know, stuff you don't really need in real life. He's like, yeah, I'm so proud of you. God, I'm so proud. Does your dad ever say I'm proud of you? Does he ever ask you to sit right on his lap and whisper in your ear? I'm proud of you, son. Not in a gay way. your dad didn't say that i said that as this isn't a game is this inappropriate why am i on your lap who's the dad here god well my dad did say wow i'm so proud that you got a master's at nyu for something that anyone can just do on canva which is make a flyer for a restaurant and then he said you realize i was being sarcastic right so i don't know technically he said he was proud of me but i don't know if totally he was proud of me i don't know if our conversations were so explicit like that.

56:37I love that wording. And Charlie's like, yeah, Seth and my dad couldn't be more different. I mean, just in the way he gives me like life advice, like my dad would fucking laugh at that. You know, it's like, this guy is so fucking full of horse shit. It's fair. So then Seth was like, Hey, you know what? You don't get to pick your parents, but you do get to pick your masters at NYU. God, I'm so proud of you. Wow. Restaurant marketing. And look at what you're doing with that. You are doing something with that. Are you doing something with it? Was it real? Is this a real master? Is this just something you told your mom?

57:09Anyway, remove your expectations completely for both of them. And now it's time to go rip and become Charlie fucking. You know, I actually don't know your last name. Sorry, this motivational speaking thing is really new for me. Charlie Chocolate Factory. That's what I'm going to call you, kid. All right. Charlie and the Boner Factory. Am I right? You and me. So, hey, you got heartburn? Why are you coughing like that? He's like, got a hangover. He's like, oh, yeah, what time did you get home? I remember that. I got home, got three, four, five, six in the morning. Girls with me, guys with me. Who knows?

57:38Who knows even who's with me? Are you Pam? What's the Pam thing? You guys hang out with the Pam's person? What's that about? You like cooking? What's that? Fuck everybody? Is it bisexual? Who's he stickin' stickin'? What's his body count? You got a roommate? What's his deal? What's his body count? Okay. And Charlie's like, yeah, he's like bisexual. You know, oh, so that's like fluid. So that's fluid. Does he have to go to the, he has to go to like Pet Boys or something, get that fluid replaced. I'm just kidding. Just kidding. Just like want to break the ice. And it's very serious. Hey, I'm just a bro.

58:07You know, I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you for getting your fluids changed. Good for you. He's like, it's called pansexual, I guess, like pans or something. And he goes, oh yeah, pansexual. That's what I'm trying to get to. Don't tell my wife. It's a good one, right? I went to Williams-Noma. I went to Williams-Noma. I was like, you got any pans in here? Yeah, see what I, because it's pans. I came. It's no pans. I came. They didn't like it. I came anyway. I'm not allowed to go back there. I turned that Le Crusade into some Le Cruste, if you know what I'm saying. Whenever Charlie wants out of a conversation, he just goes, fair, fair.

58:45I think I may do the same thing. Fair. So now we cut to Georgia. Brooks and Chloe getting on a party bus. And Georgia's like, this is the SS Georgia. so they're all gathering for this and Georgia is Georgia asks Chloe if she's seen Charlie since the date and she's like no you haven't like would you go again and she's like well he hasn't asked me and Brooks is like yeah please do it and disrespect my sister again hey bus driver did you hear this so Charlie texted me dot dot dot dot dot he's like yeah my dad met with Charlie I guess I should have a dad that's like willing to do that like uh right now it's feeling like a big negative but also my finger really hurts needles are hard so then uh ariana everybody starts coming but ariana brings laundry because gia told her to just bring her laundry and it's like so expensive at the hotel yeah she's smart bring that laundry she also brought two giant dogs onto this party bus so then uh now we're in jersey and g is like i really do enjoying hosting parties like the setting up for it is honestly fine and then she's just setting up and there's dog shit everywhere and everyone meanwhile on the party bus the real drama of the episode starts so georgia's like guys should we play a game and riley's like well we could do something like whisper a question into shy's ear and then be like who's the weirdest person here okay cool let's play it okay so So Shai's like, okay, who's the most likely to ditch you at a club?

1:00:24Which is a messy question because we know where this is going. And George is like, two points to Charlie. Like, totally ditched me at a club just the other day. He's like, I didn't ditch you. We were busy. We were busy hooking up. We met girls. And Riley's like, yeah, but I told George, I was like, it would have been fine if you came up and like, hey, we're about to go with these girls. But, like, you didn't even tell us. He's like, yeah, I told Dylan to tell you. So we basically did say bye. She's like, Dylan did not tell us. And he goes, yeah, but then you got mad at that girl. And she's like, no, I wasn't.

1:00:56And he goes, yeah, it's on camera, Riley. So she's like, no, I didn't. He goes, yeah, Dylan and I are talking to these girls. And Riley goes up and she's like, yo, you think it's cool just to be here with Charlie and not come up and make sure it's not cool with me? Like you did this whole like thing. She's he's like waving his finger and rolling his head. Oh, hell no. My couch back. I backed my couch up all the way into the wall. And I was already feeling a little like my eyebrow was already raised from earlier in the season when they were saying Riley can be like really scary sometimes. She's like scary.

1:01:27I was like, this feels like a little microaggression a personally. So Riley is like, I didn't do that. That too with him earlier in the season. And when that happened, I was like, is this like a generational thing where they're just like, that's fine for them? Like, I didn't think I honestly had a moment where I was like, is it like, are we more sensitive to that kind of thing in older generations? Because it didn't even seem to ping anything on the show. So I was like, well, I was first I personally was actually a little shocked when Georgia said scary. And then the subsequent conversation in this van, mainly because this is a younger generation.

1:02:04And they were a generation that was like very active and part of a lot of the conversation around these microaggressions that came out in 2020. So it was like shocking to me, but maybe I shouldn't be shocked because, you know, white people are going to white people. But like I was sort of surprised that they were that they were surprised to be called out for microaggressions in the scene. I'm like, I'm like, you guys are the young people. It's like the old people that you would think would be the ones who'd be like, what? But like you're the young people who should have been like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry.

1:02:33Like, I thought you all had many conversations about this and were much more in tune about this than than us. You're the ones who've been schooling the old people. So what the hell? Yeah. I thought maybe it's like something that they just collectively were like, okay. I guess, I don't know, like it doesn't bother them. Anyway, it pinged me too, but I didn't say anything at the time because I was like, what are these kids doing? I was like, yeah, it pinged me, but I was like, it didn't seem to be a storyline. I was like, okay, you know, okay, whatever. So then we see a flashback of what happened with Riley and this girl, Sylvia.

1:03:08So Riley goes, what's your name? She goes, Sylvia. hi Sylvia nice to meet you sorry I love my friends girls ask my name I'm his friend so you should be nice to him yeah she was basically the conversation well she was like yeah like basically like why aren't you introducing yourself to us like hello we're here or something and so Riley's like yeah I just went up and said hey I'm Riley and like you didn't say anything you didn't introduce yourself to us and Charlie's like yeah but like what was the attitude like oh yeah and that's what he does his snappy finger head she and she's like uh no I didn't and Charlie goes yeah the girl actually handled it well and Ava's like who and he says the girl like I'm saying that the girl handled Riley well and George was like um yeah those girls never introduced themselves but that was off Charlie and he's like well Riley never introduced herself and I didn't see her go up and say hey nice to meet you first thing she did was like start accosting her and so Riley's like had enough at this point yeah so George is wait Riley because the rise starts to cry and she's like wait Riley are you okay do you need a hug don't touch me I was like no I'm just mad because every you guys all do this she's and George is like what are you really what's what's wrong and so George Riley is like I'm not trying to make it a thing but I hate that when you guys try to play this like I'm scary or I'm scaring the random white girl it's just so annoying and it just sucks because it's like a real thing that I have to go through every single day and I'm so fucking nice to everybody and there's always like Everyone trying to come off whenever I talk to some white girl that I'm trying to scare them.

1:04:41No, your girls were rude. It's disrespectful. You're around people. Introduce yourself. And he goes, well, I don't know about what them being white has to do with anything. Oh, my God. Charlie, Rita, fuck it. It's not about them being white. It's about you making Riley seem like she was a monster and on a rampage and terrifying. When actually the girls were the rude ones. and Riley was trying to be nice even though she was a little annoyed by them. Yeah, and she's like, you just waved your finger and rolled your head. Like, what the hell? He goes, oh yeah, that's not a racial thing. And she's like, okay, but then when have I ever done that?

1:05:18Like, when have I ever waved my finger and rolled my head? What the hell? Don't do that. And he's like, yeah, I think this conversation's a little bit extra. Which in turn is yet another. So she's like, well, fine. He's doing it again. Like, this guy does not fucking listen or learn. What an idiot. it so ava's like i think there are specific nuances that like you don't even think about and charlie's like well i didn't well i'm sorry i'm sorry i don't want to make you upset and i's like well because you just did the same thing with the hand sanitizer thing georgia like you were like oh yeah you were just scary in the way you just said it and i let it go so we so it did actually ping on the radar and georgia's like well riley you said that hand washing thing so calm to me and it was just the tone of voice thing and i love you now i'm over it so she's not about She said it nice, but the tone was scary.

1:06:05Okay. How do you say something nice, but the tone was scary? Yeah. She said it was a tone thing. Oh, my God. Calm, but scary. So she's like, I love you. I'm over it now. It's not about you being over it. It's about what you said. So she's like, but yeah, but I was with you when this happened, and you're annoyed with the situation, and all I said is they should introduce themselves instead of you guys acting like we're two separate groups. It's like a manners thing. and charlie's like okay okay i subscribe to that logic okay and she goes yeah so i'm just introducing myself to show manners that she did not show and he's like you confronted her this little girl he goes this little girl you confronted her and she goes oh really little girl she's older than me because i'm taller i scared her like why are you trying to spin this narrative that i'm like this scary black girl when i'm not this scary black girl he's just not getting it oh my god and also like riley didn't i didn't find that riley was actually confrontational she said i mean maybe was she like maybe a little sarcastic or whatever but when she said she was like yeah she's being sarcastic she was like hey nice to meet you thanks for introducing yourself like what the hell like you come into a group of people and you don't even say hi you know so riley charlie's like well this is so far from what i said let's be very clear she's no it's your mannerisms you do this all the time you don't realize when you do shit and it's annoying because it's bigger than just the stupid conversation because this shit I have to deal with and you're just adding to it.

1:07:29And he's like, well, I didn't mean to imitate you in an offensive way. And she's like, okay, well, I'll just hit a chord. So Ava is saying how Riley is trying to explain to him, like, oh, there are all these different microaggressions that she may be feeling on a daily basis. And he contributed to it unknowingly. And it's not his intention, but like, you know, like double down on anywhere else you want in life. But when you've actually hurt your friend's feelings, you have to stop doubling down. Yeah, like, hello. So she's trying to explain it to him. And he says, he's like, sorry for hurting your feelings.

1:08:01I didn't mean to make you feel this way. And she's like, okay, but maybe be loving about it. You know, you don't need to defend yourself. And he goes, okay, you know what? I'm just going to be silent. This is the classic thing. I can't see anything right. I'll just be quiet. I'll be quiet. All these defensive women, I guess I'll just shut up now. So now he's the victim. Try it more. Yeah. so we get to New Jersey and everyone shows up and Charlie's like by the way nobody tell Gia about our fight because I don't want her to be mad at me too I don't need more enemies at this party oh relax sir you are the aggressor here you cannot act like you're the victim of anything so they go to the party while you sit here talking about the entire episode how oh daddy doesn't love me daddy doesn't love me and like you expect some sympathy from us and yet when your friend expresses something that she wants sympathy for, suddenly it's like, oh, I can't say anything.

1:08:55It's all defensive. I know, I see what you're trying to do, but at the end of the day, I feel like the audience is just feeling like your dad has a point. So Riley goes off to the side and calls Candy, and she's like, you know when people try to mimic black women and they like purse their lips and like start slinging their finger around, and Candy's like, I know he did not. She's like, yeah. and you know like i've heard the slurs and everything but no one's ever like none of my friends ever did it to me i mean wow and so then charlie is like well by the way like he's he's talking to shy and he's like by the way i learned sanskrit in elementary school yeah i mean i forgot it now but like i know sanskrit so i mean the juxtaposition of this guy living in such privilege that he's in an elementary school where like the most important thing is to learn sanskrit like a dead language he's like yeah it's like he learned sanskrit but he did not learn how to actually relate to human beings so um riley's basically saying like um yeah then basically after that he was just like oh what oh now you're trying to paint me as a racist i'm like i'm not trying to i'm not gonna let you paint me as this scary black woman when i'm not and candy's candy's like well i'm glad that you let him know i don't think it's cool he wouldn't have done if it was one of the white girls and you know it just frustrates me to hear that because as a black woman you're the minority and it's okay.

1:10:18And you've learned how to make friends in all different circles from all walks of life. And that's one thing I'm proud of you about. And you're not afraid to speak up for yourself, which you should, and you, and you, you should, you shouldn't be afraid. And he's going to have to learn to deal with black women. And if this is his first lesson, then let that be it. I was like, yes. I love candy. So then, um, Brooks is talking to the psychic Amal. And he's like, I wanted to find out if you have a message for one of my friends, like maybe be more respectful towards Brooks's sister because my friend went out with my sister.

1:10:56She's like, oh, my God, I knew you were coming. Please stop. I've already seen it. I'm already exhausted from this storyline. I saw it in the bus on the way here. Okay, listen. Is your friend the one with the chain with the heart? Because I could feel his energy. And he's probably the one that needs me the most. I will go to him. So now Charlie, meanwhile, is like, okay, I need to go apologize to Riley because if I stay here, I think that psychic is going to come try to talk to me. So, hey, Riley, you want to talk? She's like, okay, well, let's get a drink first. They sit down to talk. And he's like, look, I want to apologize again.

1:11:27I did not mean to make you that upset. I certainly did not mean to offend you with any imitation of you. She's like, yeah, I mean, my only thing is that when you say that something has racial backgrounds to me, you just don't understand that. And if I'm your friend, just listen what I'm saying and actually care about it. He's like, fair, fair. Yeah, fair. Okay, yeah. I see your point of view. Totally fair. Yep. Glad I heard you on this. Genuinely sorry. Okay. Genuinely sorry. So she's like, okay. So they hug. And then meanwhile, Ariana is also yacking out. She's like, oh, my God, I'm going in the pool.

1:11:58Make sure my tampon strings are hanging out. And then there's party stuff happening, making the pizza. Charlie and Eva are cutting dough into a heart. and Riley is like, they're just like joking about it. Like, oh my God, like, is your man going to get jealous? So Georgia talks to Charlie and she's like, did you apologize? He goes, yeah, but I already apologized on the bus to be clear. She goes, no, but like sometimes you're just like, I'm sorry, but like not really like I'm sorry. And he goes, because I'm not really sorry. And she's like, well, don't, don't say that. So there's another guy here, Cooper, who's Georgia's best friend.

1:12:33He's like another gay. And he's like, well, don't say that. And Charlie's like, well, can't people just be happy I'm saying sorry? Like, you can't make me feel sorry. Like, I said sorry. What more do you want from me? And so Cooper's like, um, hi, I'm Cooper, and I'm about to get on this show. Yeah. Excuse me. So meanwhile, Charlie goes up to Chloe. He's like, hey, you got any plans this weekend? You want to chill and give Seth more ammo? And she's like, yeah, that's actually what I had on my books. like I was like Saturday hang out with Charlie press him so that my dad gives him more problems so meanwhile Cooper's like okay Charlie's not watching time to make my move so he goes on over and he's like um yeah so hey Ava so I was like talking to like Charlie a second ago and like he said he's like not apologetic at all yeah pass it along he's like oh my god that's so annoying and so she's like that is so rude to Riley my god so now she goes to Riley and shy and she's like yeah hey guys can I sit down okay so here's what I heard um Charlie's not really sorry and Riley's like okay that's hurtful and Ava's like yeah and I'm close to Charlie and I wanted to know if you wanted to speak to him about it in a way that could maybe get through to him a little bit more oh my god and Riley's like oh you're another black woman so I mean whatever I guess he views you the same way he views me but I'm bigger and I'm from the south like we're just different you know like you're from New York and you have these New York experiences and I'm not in New York I just wish you would tell him like I'm a black woman too and doing like a head roll and a finger wave like that hurts you know and you have to know let him know that's not okay you know so I like that Riley's like, yeah, I can talk to him, but so can you.

1:14:21Ava. And so Charlie sits down and then Ava confronts Charlie. Just kidding, it was Riley. Because Ava's not going to necessarily yet. So Riley, he sits down and she's like, hey, I heard you said that you didn't actually believe what you said. You just said it to appease me. He's like, anyway, yeah. But like, is that what you want? We've been over this. I apologize. And she's like, you know what? We're good. We're good. He's like, oh, well, I hope you mean that. I'm like, oh, so you want her to be sincere for appeasement, but you get to appease? Okay, got it. Yeah. So she just walks away. And Ava's like, Charlie, I'm really trying to be your friend.

1:15:00And he goes, oh, now you're mad at me? Oh, great, great, great. Now everything's mad. Now everybody's mad at me. You know what? I'm not going to sit here and listen to this. And she's like, okay, then I'm done helping you. He goes, yeah, I'm done. I'm out of here. I never asked for your help with Riley. I'm done. I'm out of here. so then he goes up to Riley he's like are we okay now are we fighting again because now I'm fighting with Ava about this and she's like okay but like you just need to realize that you have black women that are friends and he's like oh god I thought we were fine now we're not fine wow wow yeah so now he's gonna walk away and uh and then like she's like no wait stop like just like like let's talk about this she grabs his hand and he's like oh well let go of my hand I'm not having this conversation again.

1:15:41I'm getting an Uber. So she's like, whatever. She lets go. And Brooks is like, wow, that's like fucked up, right? Chloe. And Chloe's like, what's wrong with him? So he goes inside the house and there's like a mall, mall's like, now it's my chance. She's like, so I did want to tell you that you have beautiful energy. And if you're open to it, I would love to just sit with you and just talk, not even do cars. Just talk. I don't know. I'm single you're single we're adults we're consenting i know whatever you want he's like no no i'm going to politely decline but i appreciate the offer okay thanks and she's like i'm gonna light a candle for you like a dead person i'm going to pretend you have passed on to the spirit world did not just diss me like this on television he's like whatever crazy so he leaves and he's like i also like that in the middle of this doggy gate i also like that in the middle of this shy is like inside there's like a like a cheese board and shy is like what is that is that cheese is it not cheese?

1:16:38I can't tell. I mean, it's orange. Is this cheese? And then I think it was Ava was like, wow. You weren't sure what it was, but you ate like half of it. That's a big tester bite.

1:16:50And that brings us to the end of Next Gen NYC. Loved it. Loved it. Great times. Learned it. Thanks everyone for being here and get tickets for our show at WatchWhatCrapins.com and we'll catch you on the next episode. Bye everyone. Watch What Crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. Our way is the Amberway. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. She can run my country. It's Angie McGovern. It's Always Automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp. Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. We never miss her call. It's Diane Call.

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