#2939 McBee Dynasty S02E04: Russian To Judgment

0:01Ben Mandelker: Cha-ching! That's the sound of Lowe's Labor Day Savings. Get up to 45 % off select major appliances and save up to an additional$100 on select laundry pairs. Plus, get three bags of Miracle-Gro.75 cubic foot garden soil for just$10. Labor Day deals are on now at Lowe's. In-store and online. Valid through 9-9. While supplies last. Selection varies by location. See Lowe's.com for more details. Soil offer excludes Alaska and Hawaii. Hey guys, it's Paige from Giggly Squad. Okay, can we all agree that hosting is so much fun? And I really do love it. Every weekend, it's come over for snacks, let's make dinner together, and somehow the second you put out a fruit platter, it seems that bugs show up before your friends do.

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1:37Plug in a Zeevo flying insect trap so you can work smarter, not harder, and actually enjoy your time at home.

2:07Well, hello everybody and welcome to Watch What Crapens. I'm Ronnie and that's Ben. Hello, Ben.

2:13Ben Mandelker: Hi, Ronnie. How are you? Good. Welcome to McBee Dynasty Day, Ben. Your favorite show is back on television this week. How do you feel about it? You know what? how did you feel about it i love it i think it's great i cracked up i crack up i love the great uh chicken drama of 2025 i'm in macho versus galena galena coming in drunk to work my crazy laugh that she has i love that psychopath love her well very exciting times uh just a heads up we are doing amazon live i don't know when you're hearing this but if you hear it in time or if it already happened, well, go check out the replay. We are on Amazon Live, our first ever foray into it.

3:01Ben Mandelker: We're going to have so much fun with it. Can't wait to talk about all the fun recommendations. We're going to just, you know, it's us. We're going to be silly. We're going to talk. We're going to keep you. Yankee. Kids say. We will not be drunk like Galena. We will be sober. I don't know. It's at 5.30 p.m. We can be drunk. There's no log. Happy hour. also just a shout out to chelsea devontez glamorous trash uh i am on the latest episode talking about sheena shay's new autobiography called my good side so definitely go check out glamorous trash thank you chelsea for having me on i had such a fun time lots of laughter good times all right let's jump into some mcb dynasty last we saw mcb dynasty they're just children they're just children Kala seemed to be riding off to greet her pastors back home and then she came to find out poor Stephen had invited her as gender reveal I mean the whole deal is confusing to me at this point I mean you're putting smoke outside a helicopter and one is pink and one is blue we're gonna confuse the geese down below what about the cows I mean you'll wind up hitting a combine into a combine if I know anything about human What if that baby comes out identifying as a tractor?

4:19What do you do then? What's the color for that?

4:24Ben Mandelker: Previously on McBee Dynasty, I learned how to make a flyer using Microsoft Red. And we got some good clip area out of it. And I made up a good pun that said, is it going to be a Mickey, a McShea, or a McTractor? Stay tuned. Meanwhile, yours truly here Rolled out the welcome wagon For the new Russian in town, Masha And I ain't no weather, girl But I think there's a storm of brewing Can Tessa just do my life like this? I just want Tessa to narrate my life And there Ronnie goes Getting out of bed at 12 p.m. Even though the dog got him up at 6 a.m. Reading some trashy teenager Young adult bullshit Before he ate ten bagels in a row there we go good luck children i think this show needs a lot more tessa and a lot less steven that's gonna be my note uh there because tessa is the most entertaining part of the whole well i mean you could galena's probably the most entertaining part but tessa is like the one that i enjoy like she's the actually the only person who i like my heart like actually opens up a centimeter when i see her on screen and everyone else i'm just like oh but like tessa Give us more Tessa.

5:38Ben Mandelker: Why do we only get her in these opening scenes here? Yeah, I think it was very smart to make Tessa the narrator of this after Steve Sr. left. Because she's keeping it together. Well, someone made a mess of the lodge. Not to mention, but handheld. That's what I consider foul play. Someone going to explain that to me? I don't really get that. Why would a chicken be playing baseball? so so Allie she's at a place called the Fine Stitch she's trying on wedding dresses for her friends we're all named like Hallie, Callie and Ballie and then Steven Jr everyone guess what harvest season's coming up so we're gonna have a meeting so y 'all guess what we need to harvest always be harvesting ABC always be harvesting Steven there's no C in harvest oh yeah there is now because we're McBees and we put seeds in everything that we want.

6:35Okay, when we want to do it, we're$6 million in debt. It's a kickoff to the McHarvest, right? McHarvest McBee Farm Harvest Harve. He's like, yeah, the Harvest is our Super Bowl. Oh, okay. I'm sure the Super Bowl is your Super Bowl because y 'all have Super Bowl. I mean, gays can say things like that, right? Where we're like, oh, yeah, you know, the Beyonce concert, that's our Super Bowl because we're gay. You guys already have your Super Bowl. It's called the fucking Super Bowl, Steve.

7:02Ben Mandelker: You have the Super Bowl. You have it. Although I have the Super Bowl, too, because I love football. So then Kala is at her condo, and she's calling her mom to be like, I'm at the condo, ma 'am. And then we go to a truck. I mean, least shocking words said, recapping this show. Is someone conceiving a baby?

7:26Ben Mandelker: We're going to the truck, and Cole and Casey and Masha calls. and Masha's like, hello, Cole, how are you? And he's like, good. Casey and I just heading into town right now. She's like, oh, good. Well, I just got to ranch and I really don't want to be here by myself. So I don't know if you guys can meet me here, but I always hear that ranch goes well with cold cuts and you are Cole and I'm at ranch. So I would really appreciate it. Please come by. No, I'm not coming over there. You made your own bunny stew. You fucking sit there and stewing it yourself. I'm not going to go over there and clean up your crap, okay?

8:00Have my dad do it, who you've been fucking cheating with. Have that asshole come over and do it. I'm not doing that, Masha. But Cole's the West. So he's like, oh, we're just coming to town now so we can be there in 5 to 10. He's like, awesome. Thank you so much, Cole. Goodbye. So he's nervous. He doesn't want to go over there. But they have to because he has to clean up all of his dad's bullshit because his dad has led him to believe that he could one day lead McHarvest Day at the McBeat Honesty.

8:29Ben Mandelker: Yeah. so Casey's like I really wish Galena would move on from the Steven smash the situation because Cole and I are already the ones who have to deal with it and go over and clean up the mess like okay well Casey's a real she really comes alive on screen I'll tell you that much she really crackles that kid but you know I feel for Casey the most because I feel like at least everybody else ends up with a hot guy you know and Casey has to do all this shit and she's just with the dumb one you know casey and no sunshine bland yeah so then um we get a flashback to steven jr talking about the seven thousand dollars of damage to masha's car and asking galena if she knew anything about it she's like oh no no i know nothing about that

9:26Ben Mandelker: so casey's like casey asked the question that we're all thinking she hasn't gotten fired yet right i was like no no she's got your balls in a vice she runs the whole company she's got she's been helping this man probably with all of his shady business she's gonna take you all down i wouldn't fuck with her yeah so they get to the ranch and cole's like hey how was your trip to what was it called? Tulum. It's like, Tulum. Flip was great. And he's like, so it was your first time being back. She's like, yes, I am so anxious. Can we look at birdie? Look at chickens. Oh, no. Oh, no, Ginger missing. Ginger is my favorite chicken.

10:02Ben Mandelker: Cole's like, oh, where's Ginger? Ginger's your favorite. Ginger's your favorite. Ginger for five days, Masha. Okay, Ginger's your fucking favorite. You're not fond of the chickens in this quick a time. There was never a chicken named Ginger. I'm going to tell you that right now. so new people are farmers you're selling animals to eat and to murder so i'm not going to feel bad for your chicken running away i'm rooting for the chickens i mean if anything galena set those things free like gave them a chance you know i saw chicken run masha yeah masha's like she's like oh ginger was friendliest chicken ever like i guarantee she was just like all the other chickens she was not a friendlier chicken i'm just i'm just gonna say that funny that's how steve senior described you um so casey's like well she probably stole him because the door was just wide open because like yeah anytime you leave a door open during dark as soon as it gets dark they're done for them kids them chickens are done for she's like oh this is like next level sick what's next what is she going to sleep with the best friend's man and steal him away god it is this is so sick and disturbing leaving a door open for a fox to come in and eat a chicken the way it would happen in nature are disgusting um i mean those chickens should be eaten by humans not by foxes what sort of game is this we're supposed to be allowed to murder the chickens mom says like i'm going to miss ginger i couldn't wait to eat her i like that the animal honestly the foxes sort of have the same feeling like just no one wants to deal with this family because to be to be honest there were still like nine or ten chickens left including babies like those predators were like honestly i really just don't fuck with those mcbee chickens i want something more like how stupid chickens are like the door is open you see fucking gender running ginger knew what was up no but they also know like ginger went out there look ronnie i didn't tell you i finally saw sinners as i mentioned about five times last week on the podcast we all know what happens when you leave the barn don't leave the barn don't don't leave the barn Ginger had the right instinct to be like, freedom, but was it?

12:08Ben Mandelker: Freedom comes at a price, though, Ginger. Yeah. What else is freedom, but nothing left to lose or whatever? Ginger does leave the barn. Don't let Ginger back in the barn. It's another lesson I feel like you guys need to learn. Ginger's like, guys, I really messed up and I don't like it out there, so I'm going to come back into the coop. Like, oh, welcome back, Ginger. He's like, so you guys aren't going to let me in or something? What? You're going to let me in? Ginger, you've been in this coop a million times. so you're gonna let me in like what's going on guys I can sing Amazing Grace how sweet where'd you get that banjo I'm just singing my songs just want to sing with you guys just want to jam with you guys we're not even musicians okay I'll end it now I'm sorry I thought it was over it's never over I should know that never end so Cole's like so there's some chickens missing we don't know where they're at but I don't got proof it's Galena, but you know, I've been in some toxic fights.

13:09I almost had an ex-girlfriend run me over with the car one time. Uh,

13:14Ben Mandelker: just want to say to that ex-girlfriend, you need to drive better. Okay. Seriously, get better. Start it. Finish it. Can Galena start giving driving lessons? That would be nice. Like, how do you miss Cole? I'm sorry. That man is, you cannot tell me that man can get out of the way of a car. So, uh, But then back in the chicken coop, Cole's like, so when's the last time you and her talk? She says, I mean, it's been months. Well, have you ever thought about talking to her and just, you know, trying to figure it out? Maybe get her to stop. She's like, what is there to figure? I cannot. Can you imagine this conversation?

13:50What should I say? Could you stop killing my chickens? Could you? Could you maybe stop killing Ginger?

13:56Ben Mandelker: It's a start. I think that's a fair way to start a conversation. Could you please stop killing my chickens? also i just bought that frying pan could you not bash my boyfriend's hats in with it thanks yeah i like that so he's like okay let's go and look at the damage uh it's a frying pan and some cowboy hats you guys you guys are so wussy in this family i can't believe it you're lucky that that's all galena did i would have burned that fucking house down well not maybe not me in case anybody i've ever dated has their house burned down it wasn't me but in if i was galena i could have done that yeah it could have been much worse there was some issue with the dishwasher i think she broke glass and put in the dishwasher she put random things in the dish she put like doggy treats in the dishwasher and they see a footprint in case like oh well you know galena she's always barefoot running around always i'm like just just a reminder that you're married to cole just so you know no kidding you're dating a mcb and she's like yeah she's like elf it is just so crazy she put dog treats in dishwasher with bare feet all over ground?

14:59Who does this? Little elf. That's who. That is who will kill elf. I can't elf from now on.

15:05Ben Mandelker: Galena is really a very lazy jilted ex because this is like, oh, I don't know. I'll put dog food in dishwasher and call it the day. I'm like, really? Now the dogs think they don't get treat and they blame me for it. I can't even have dog as friend no more because of her. See, it's actually very smart. Delina's like, I'm not only going to ruin your relationship with a man, but dog as well. You bitch. Yeah. So Cole's like, well, I know why she's mad. And Marshall's like, what is it? Well, I've said from the beginning, because she likes you and she likes my dad. Lesbians. They're crazy, right? I think she's a lesbian.

15:42This is why we shouldn't let gay people read.

15:48Ben Mandelker: Don't say gay. Otherwise, they'll kill your frying pan. this is crazy and he's like no that's why she's so crazy that's why and casey is like i think the cold theory is right galena did really like marsha when she first started bringing her around oh must mean she wanted to go diving into the the lady bond i mean what the hell i mean they started to dress the same they started to talk this and have you seen you with your other cast members you guys all wear the same thing from marshall's okay have you been a Russian restaurant. And by the way, they don't, they show like Masha and Galena on screen wearing totally different things.

16:28Ben Mandelker: Like, look at them wearing the same things. Meanwhile, we just saw your sister-in-law, your sister in soon-to-be-law shopping for wedding dresses and there were like two and they looked exactly the same. So please be quiet. So now we go back to the kitchen and Masha's like, this makes me like so sad. Cole's like, well, I'm sorry this happened. It's crazy. Anyway, I got to go crash one tractor into another. See ya, ladies. So now we go to Jesse and Allie's city house and Stephen Jr. pulls up and their mom is there. They're having a big Chipotle lunch, the whole group. And they're all arriving and they're joking about how it's going to be late.

17:08You know that bad call. You know, it's always just so happy me and my family being together. I just love being around my family. I mean, Steve's gone. I can be more involved in their life, that motherfucker finally out of here. Stupid, stupid. I'll be in jail soon, motherfucker. I have a huge business. It's huge now. You know, Stephen didn't think my business was going to be big. It's three times as big as it was when he had it. I mean, it was worth$5 then. I can almost pay for a movie ticket with it now. Eat it, Stephen.

17:36Ben Mandelker: I was thinking, yeah, I thought we could maybe get away before the harvest and like all that, you know, before it all starts getting busy and such and all starts crashing tractors and detractors and such. So like, because once everything starts, we got the wedding and before you know it, the baby. So maybe we can go somewhere. Let's go somewhere exotic and hot and beautiful and sunny and tropical. I was thinking the Ozarks. Exactly.

18:01Basically the Hawaii of our area. So they're like, yeah, I'd be all about going to the Ozarks. We ain't been down there in three to four years. We used to vacation there all the time before Dad started fucking teenagers in Nashville for our vacations. That was fun.

18:18Ben Mandelker: The Ozarks are a special place for us because we used to go down there every summer. God, I used to feed the children Fig Newtons while we'd look at signs of Wayne Newton. Oh, my God. We would laugh and laugh and laugh. We'd go on the yacht. We'd go on boats. And Stephen's like, yeah, we'd go on jet skis. Our getaway spot was going down to the lake of the Ozarks and having a good old time. All right, Snooosh, we invite on this trip, y 'all. And Allie's like, I'm not going to be there because I can't get off work. and I live like an hour from the city. Oh, I live close to the city, but like I live an hour from here.

18:50And so if I can take an hour every time I have to come out here, then I can't go to Ozarks anymore. So sorry.

18:56Ben Mandelker: I'm like a city girl. I'm a city girl. I like getting manicures and pedicures. I'm basically a Carrie Bradshaw. Okay. I'm such a city girl. I'm Carrie Yeehaw. Okay. And I'm not going. I'm not going anywhere. Yeah. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial. I have a giant deck outside and needed to furnish it and was worried about getting things that matched and getting things from different stores and making it all work together. Well, it ended up all working out beautifully with Wayfair. I got every piece out there from Wayfair. I got couches. I got chairs. I got tables with chairs.

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22:00Ben Mandelker: but turns out she has a 5k that she's got to run which is you know people with 5ks always have a 5k to do when you want to make plans with them like hey i was thinking like in nine months from now we should like why don't we like go away for the weekend sorry i got a 5k it's like always always got i've never felt more hated i mean you know that somebody hates your ass when they're not going to come to something special because they'd rather run i mean and not even a marathon just a 5k is that not long i mean that sounds long it's long i don't think it's like marathon long i think 5k is like relatively doable that's why people do them so often it's always a 5k happening okay so that's like always the worst version is the 5k how many miles is a 5k three miles yeah that's that's like literally so much shorter because the marathon's like 26 miles and this is three 26 miles that's disgusting just just fucking chop off your knees already just say i don't care about you knees the one thing that's worse than someone saying they have to do a 5k is someone saying they're training for a triathlon and the one thing that's worse than that is someone saying they've got a marathon we all know we all know i know there are marathon runners in the audience and it's a it's a it's amazing to be able to do it i i i can't do it the problem is that when people are training for a marathon they just don't stop talking about it it's like it's it's everything like getting married having a baby running a marathon you know becoming a vegan and then what the thing is this after they do a marathon then they want to do another one like right away they're like oh yeah i actually was just signed up for another marathon in a different city like when are you ever gonna hang out again no yeah i'm really traumatized behind everybody's back like a normal person like that we don't need you having secret reasons to get away to stop so anyway ali is not going to this weekend because she has a 5k and And then Jesse is like, yeah, I bet it's something with her friends.

23:50Ben Mandelker: Silly woman. She has friends outside this family. She's like, well, it's true. I do have a race and I have friends. City friends. So Steven Jr. is like, well, that means it's boys weekend for us. Am I right, guys? And they're like, what about Calla? And he goes, well, I'm going to ask Calla. Okay. So he always does that when it's a boys weekend. He invites Calla. And Jesse's like, but you and Calla are just friends still? Are you broken up? Like, what's going on with you two? What is it? everybody's making fun of jesse's new teeth on tv i don't mind jesse's new teeth i like i think they're i think he's still real cute what's wrong with i never saw his old teeth so it doesn't it's new for me yeah um nothing i don't remember there's nothing wrong with it you want new all i have yeah all i have to all to say is i was i was surprised that they did not air for the 20 millionth time this episode steven and calla in their car with him saying you are the most pessimistic person about my family i've ever met i have to hear that quote one more time he's so angry his eye he looks just like his dad except he's all muscular and younger but it's so fun watching this big hot muscle guy slowly turn into that sick bastard father and you see it and he has he flies off the rage over these he flies off on a page over these stupid things well i don't think it's real the thing is that steven is a terrible actor and he's just really bad at doing his lines and so he always does he he takes it to a 10 every time and you just it's like he's always like all right everyone we need to get a starbucks order going because if we're gonna be harvesting we need to be energized so where is that starbucks order is it ready now i'm like you you gotta have some modulation in your well he's got so much like when he gets mad he does really get that angry angry look in his face i think i mean i don't i don't know i don't feel but you know i believe everything but i don't really feel like he's acting like remember when he got his meat truck and he's like look everybody i got a meat truck okay he's so happy he was i don't think that was acting to you i i feel like every scene where he gets angry he is acting yes i feel like he's i feel like i see it it's like so obvious to me and i'm not someone who like looks under the hood and tries to find like i'm never trying to be like you're acting this is fake this is fake i like to reality or is this reality i really like to believe the illusion but i he actually makes it hard for me to believe it because i think his acting is so bad like every time he like when he storms into the office he's like we have to talk i'm like oh god here he goes again the thing about his acting is that his back is so strong so i forgive it so um steven jr is gonna bring cala oh so he says that he just nods yes to the question which was are you guys just friends are you broken up and he nods yes and chris is like all right so you both agree with this you're really broken up because if she's not your girlfriend and why is she going to come?

26:40And he's like, well, she wants to hang out with everybody. You know, who doesn't want to be around a bunch of hillbillies that they hate? I mean, come on. It's natural. Yeah.

26:48Ben Mandelker: She hates them all. She wants to break up with this guy. So naturally, she's going to hang out, of course, because she likes TV. To be honest, you know, after that gender reveal party, I'm just a little, I mean, nobody gets along with Kayla. She hates everybody. Well, have you seen your all have you seen the brood on TV? This is what I keep on saying. Like you just have to get, wait to hear the, wait to, you haven't even started listening to the Bravo audience yet. If you think Cal hates you, listen, have you seen what people are saying on social media? Do you see what the Bravo audience is like?

27:19Ben Mandelker: Why is this show on our network?

27:24Ben Mandelker: It's a fair question. So then Christy is like, she's like, I don't think it's a good idea for Cal to come. So she's like, you don't know. He didn't have the darts being shot at you the way I did. And he's like, well, don't worry there. There won't be any drama at all. Was she mean to Christy? Was Callum mean to Christy? I don't remember that. I don't remember. I don't remember seeing that personally, but Calla was a little, she was a little cold to Christy last week. And, um, well, Calla is really bad at coming into the family and just acting like an asshole. Like she's not, she is like when she was mad at the girls, I think she had a right to be mad that nobody texted her when her sister died and all that.

28:03But then she just walks into the house. She's like, I brought protein brownies. I mean, there's nothing like saying fuck you. First, well, I guess the first one is saying I can't come to your thing because I have a marathon or a 5K. But the second thing is to say protein brownies. Get the fuck out of here with that. Yeah, there's no way that calorie just sucks. She just kind of comes in and looks at everybody like, is anybody going to talk to me? She just sucks.

28:26Ben Mandelker: And the thing is that, like, she's probably right about a lot of stuff. Like, I mean, again, the stuff with her sister is terrible. And people were like this family is like they're just a terrible family. so like they were so obnoxious by not saying anything to her so she has a right to be mad at them but just her day-to-day like how she interacts with everyone is just sort of bratty and annoying and i'm just like oh yeah i would not want her showing up at my on my vacation either and honestly i'd be mad at steven like why do you bring this like annoying person in we already have enough annoying people in this vacation rental we don't need to have cala also yeah so she's like are you gonna promise that there ain't gonna be drama he's like i cannot promise that and cole's like, y 'all are going to fight all weekend.

29:07You're going to be getting dragged back to your room. I just know it's going to happen. And Chrissy's like, these girls, what they do to my boys. Yeah. She's really like hashtag boy mom,

29:19Ben Mandelker: I think. Yeah, she really is. Don't you go out there letting one of those girls trick you into getting pregnant. Don't you do that, Steven. They'll do it to you. Boys will be boys. Am I right? I mean, look, they're always getting along really well when they're supposed to be breaking up. So then the breakup really happens and we all notice it. You think they'd notice that by now? So now, so they're basically like, yeah, she's going to come. So now, guess what, everyone? This trip that they're going to do before Harvest, well, I guess it will happen, but it's Harvest now. So it's the first day of Harvest.

29:52Ben Mandelker: I'm like, well, I don't know how your pre-Harvest trip is going to work. We're also going to go directly to a Harvest scene, but that's fine. Continuity a little off there, guys. So it's the first day of Harvest. All right, boys. it's game time i want your game faces on i want your best foot forward i want you to get ready let's take this fail so jesse's they're going to get their they got on there these combines they'll start driving through town with these you know to head to the crops and jesse's like yeah it's like the first day of the harvest is like the opening game to the nfl season you get jacked up you're hyped you've been waiting all year there's taylor swift cheering you on being like go harvest go harvest you know some ladies singing the national anthem not hitting the notes right we all boo her stupid lady you know our country songs okay i love rolling through town with our combine but probably not as much as cole because cole is sad and he hasn't had a triumph in 20 years so this is the best part of his year and then yeah apparently cole was a star quarterback his high school days when he was a star quarterback oh my god how small is this town that that's your star quarterback.

31:00It's Cole.

31:02Ben Mandelker: So then Cole, of course, is like, yeah, rolling through Galatine on the combine. I feel like a man driving those things. You get in that big equipment and everyone's just looking at you and they're like, get out of your way, you know? And you just be like, yeah, I'm that dude. I'm like, no, they're not thinking that. They're like, I have to get to CVS and I'm stuck behind a giant ass truck driven by a guy with a small penis who has triumphed in high school and peaked then. And now he's taking a victory lap. well i need to get my prescription that's what they're thinking it must not be passing us because we'd be like um thanks for the global warming you fucking monster would you like to transfer your ford f-150 on a private plane anywhere i mean jesus christ literally anyone who's been stuck behind a tractor never says wow look at that man there's a real man driving that i want to be him They're like, get the fuck out of the way.

31:55Ben Mandelker: Pull over. So those of us who use this road for the way it should be used with cars, not farm vehicles need to get places. Yeah. So they're all excited to get to drive these big combine. My favorite sentence is, wow, I really love driving our combines down the street. It says so much about this show. So they're really excited. and they're so, you know, it's like, oh my God, we're going to do it, we're going to do it. And we hear, bang! And Cole's like, wait, did we hit something? And Jesse's like, we broke something. He's like, oh fucking damn it, dude. Dude, are you kidding me? Oh, geez. We're first fucking dead, god damn it.

32:35Cole has crashed into another tractor and he's hurt the nipple. What do they call that thing on the top? We learned the word for it. The gate for the corn, the corn gate. Oh yeah, it was like the dribble bucket.

32:45Ben Mandelker: Yeah, the dribble bucket. I don't think it was called the dribble bucket. it was called something it was dribble catch or something you know what i just learned that that thing is up there it's called um it's it's called a uh gender dribble and you use it to put the powder for a gender reveal one of those she was so excited i think tesla was a little coked up or something on that one she's like you're saying the dribble maker dribble maker she was real excited about that. So Cole crashes into another tractor and he's horrified because it's Cole. You know, it sucks being the one that always fucks up.

33:23That's me in my family. When I fuck something up, my family's like, okay, well, there's no shock. There's no shock there. So it sucks being that person, but also, you know, maybe stop being the person that fucks up all the time. Cole, fucking braggart. You probably don't even know how to drive that. Obviously, you don't even know how to drive that thing, sir.

33:41Ben Mandelker: Sir, no. So, yeah, he crashed the tractor on the first day of harvest no less you dumb fuck wow who's the man now combine crasher so steven's like he's like i'm gonna get into my suv because i can't even watch this travesty happening because that's classic cole you know he's always complaining let him have take some power let me have some authority i love my brother he's a hard worker but this is exactly why he's not in charge of the farm also our combines were parked at the farm in the first place so i don't even know why i drove through town why why are the combines by the way why are the combines not at the fields why are they at a why is the garage not where the fields are answer i think they are in the field right because he says we've got two dead combines in the field and a bunch of corn to get cut i know but like why why did they have to drive them through town why don't they just have the combines at the field it's farming day sir it's mick harvest okay i don't know have you been paying attention do you have a calendar that specifies national holidays have you not heard I'm just not supporting this at all.

34:45So Cole's like, oh, that's the last time we're bringing Steven out on the first day because it's hard to keep working when you got someone in such a bad mood around you. Yeah, Cole, because you fucking crashed the equipment.

34:57Ben Mandelker: If you can't drive your combine because Steven is there, that is not you cannot say it's that you felt the pressure of Steven. Sir, you are a bad combine driver. How do you rear end another tractor, Cole? Why are you tailgating your tractors? You're going three miles per hour also. If you're going 60 miles per hour, I would maybe get it. But you're going three miles per hour. Well, yeah, slow crashes are sadder, right? But he was going, I think, past it and hit the nipple thing on the arm on the roof of the other one, right? I think it was, like, lowered too far or something. He's probably showing off his dribble nipple or whatever in town.

35:34He's like, we're about to pass the express, so I'm going to really move around this nipple dribbler. and then he hit it on the other tractor, which broke it. I think he was trying to brag. I think that was an extension of his penis and his mind and he was trying to show it off to the town. He was basically flashing the town with a nipple dribbler and look what it got him into.

35:56Ben Mandelker: It got him into shit. Trouble. Trouble. I'm going to find out what the name of that fucking nipple dribbler is because it's driving me crazy. I'm trying to find it in our own notes. Nipple dribbler. Nipple dribbler? Just keep it that. nipple dribbler something's going on in my neighborhood there's a lot of notifications in my whatsapp oh is it did someone crash a combine they're probably i've got a notification a real man's driving through town in a combine everyone get to the sidewalk wave at him well yesterday people were sending around pictures of a bobcat and today there's oh there's someone trying to squat in one of the houses.

36:37Hi, all. There's a guy. He walked into the driveway and plugged his phone into my power outlet, rang the doorbell, and left after I told him to leave, but cursed as he walked away. Keep an eye out. Is he around right now? I don't see him. Well, here's my address, you guys. Go find him. She's showing pictures of a ring cam, and then this guy's just sitting outside her front door because there's a big problem with squatting around here, okay? People are just trying to move into your house when you're gone at work. I'm telling you, you want that? You're about to get hit with a nipple dribbler. You better get to someone else's lawn.

37:09Ben Mandelker: This just in. This just in is not called a nipple dribbler. It's called a dribbledore. Dribbledore. Not to confuse a Dumbledore. It's a dribbledore. There's a dribbledore. So the dribbledore is what happened. Not the nipple dribbler. But I like the nipple dribbler. It took place at basketball school. Yes. Dribbledore.

37:33Ben Mandelker: okay so um now that was killing me that was killing me i was like i i stepped away from the podcast for a second there because i was like i need to get to the bottom i'm glad i'm glad you got it and i'm glad you spelled it out and put it up on the screen for people to see it that was really and now we're back yeah now we're back educational y 'all we have a lot of fun banners here look whitney levitt has left the group chat look great by the way wrong wrong it's good time Okay, so now we go to Christy and Jesse because Jesse has to get a suit because he's going to get married. Okay? And they're at a store called State and Liberty because what else would it be called?

38:10You know? You know, when I think of high fashion, you know what?

38:15Ben Mandelker: I want to wear something. I want to get something fashionable, something chic. I'm going to go to a place called State and Liberty. Hey, y 'all need some shoes because I'm running right down to freedom and laces. Y 'all need anything.

38:32Ben Mandelker: so um jesse uh comes out of the fitting room he's wearing kind of like a very light blazer um with just a button down and light pants and christy is acting like he just stepped out of tom ford's like atelier she's like oh jesse you look so handsome i love it it is like the most casual look and she's like blown away. She's like, I just, I can't believe it. You don't even smell like cow dung today, honey. You're really making an effort. And he's like, well, does it make sense for me to wear a Votage? Like, well, what does Ali think on that? He's like, I guess we got to call her. So they call Ali.

39:18And she's like, what? I'm busy. I'm working. I'm like, I'm working. I'm in the city. I'm like, hold on, hold on, hold on, There's a Conk's Combine passing. Conk's Combine. Woo-hoo! Harvest Day. Who fucking cares? This is the city. Get off the road.

39:32Ben Mandelker: Hold on. I'm going to Neiman Marcus because I'm a city girl. Hello. Could someone point me to the Neiman Marcus of Kansas City? No? Sorry. I'm looking for something a little more fashionable. I'm going to be going to amendment and filibuster. Thanks. Hold on. Excuse me. I'm typing right now. I couldn't help but wonder, was I at the corner of state and liberty, or is my liberty part of the state? Does this make sense? I don't know. I'm a city girl. I can type whatever I want. Okay, honey, do you want him to wear a bow tie or a regular tie? And she's like, I mean, I don't care. What do you think, Jesse?

40:06And he's like, I want the bolo tie. She goes, oh, we discussed this, Jesse. We discussed it.

40:15Ben Mandelker: I wanted someone to say, did he know that we said bow tie and not bolo tie? I don't think Bolo was on the table. He likes enraging Allie because Allie is hard to get a reaction out of. So he's always just saying things to piss off Allie. He's lying in bed like, well, how come you don't come over here, though? How come you want me to drive over there? How come you don't come here? And now he's just changing it to Bolo tie because he knows it's going to piss her off. He's like, what about this? I was kind of left thinking, taking a whole bunch of burnt ends and put them on my kebab stick and then just hanging that from my neck.

40:45Ben Mandelker: Does that count as a tie? No, Jesse, I am a city girl. If you wear burnt hands as your tie, I will divorce you as soon as I marry you. He's like, well, Allie definitely was fancier than me. She wants to do things fancy, but I snuck some things in there. We all get to wear cowboy hats. Thank God. Wow. He's really going to be a great husband. Forcing her to give up the city house. The one day of the year where she gets to do something creative in her life, he's going to push back and wear a cowboy hat. because god forbid he doesn't wear a cowboy hat it's like sorry sir you wear a cowboy hat every single day of your life could you not wear it for one day i had a dream because you know i love jesse like i'm in love with him and so i had this dream one time that i married jesse and we you know it was like five years in the future and jesse just went like because i'm i don't care about well don't care about my weight is hilarious thing to say on this podcast because i bitch about it all the time but you know like i love to eat and i don't really work out or do any of that stuff and so he started taking my habits and he got real chubby and lost all of his hair and like he had a big bald spot and it wasn't bad or anything i was still cute but i woke up thinking god that's what i'm gonna do to a man i can't wait you know just like make them lose all of their um discipline and all of that stuff but it stayed in my that dream has stayed in my mind because a i was happy when i woke up and also because i think that's why he only wears cowboy hats what if he's bald under there he took his cowboy hat off he did when he took his cowboy hat off at some point in the episode and it looked it looked a little weird he wasn't balding it just it he looked like the cowboy hat actually he looks really good in one so like yeah for all my complaints man in a cowboy hat i mean why the hell my complaints like be and expect to wear a cowboy i'll allow a cowboy hat but i don't like how he's acting like it's like also like can you just try to make your future your wife happy if she has a request can you like just try to honor it commercials here comes one right now hey guys it's page from giggly squad okay can we all agree that hosting is so much fun and i really do love it every weekend it's come over for snacks let's make dinner together and somehow the second you put out a fruit platter it seems that bugs show up before your friends do This is why I have to have my Zeevo flying insect trap.

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45:26Ben Mandelker: a pissing matchup with this gray suit. She changed her mind. She literally said she changed her mind. They're just like a couple of children. They met when they were little babies, and that's still how they communicate. It's like, I want some toast. Why don't you give me some toast while you were in there? You can get your own toast. Oh, yeah? Tell me your least cuddle. I don't know. It's like their love language is like childish bitching at each other or something. I don't know. So now they've got to figure out the suspenders. So Chrissy's like, well, what color would you like the suspenders?

45:51Ben Mandelker: Jesse was calling it maroon, or one of those strange liberal colors. but i think it was something else and jesse's like he's like well is it not maroon is it not cinnamon cinnamon get your cinnamon cinnamon suspenders well did they show them because i feel like they showed something that was kind of a purplish i mean at least he was close i don't know where cinnamon came from that was that was far i'm not gonna lie i think at some point during the scene my eyes transitioned to literally anything else in my room i think i was maybe on my phone or looking at a pillow or a spider in the corner. I was no longer putting all my senses towards this scene.

46:31Ben Mandelker: Oh, poor guy. So Christy's like, well, lately, Ellie and Jesse have been snapping on each other a bit more, you know? And from my experience, married couples need to sleep in the same bed. From your experience, your husband is a piece of shit. So let's not bring any of your experience into this. Because your husband fucking sucks, man. Your husband went and started fucking one of your friends. Like, he's an awful human being. Now, that said, I think she's right. Do you think she's right? I mean, I don't know. Long distance couples work, so her whole thing about they work. They can't sleep in the same bed because if you're not together, it'll all go downhill from there.

47:04These newfangled relationships, I don't get it. But I don't know. It seems to make sense, but I'm not ever I mean, it's like,

47:11Ben Mandelker: look, different strokes for different folks. But I just don't understand why you build a whole city house and then you're like, well, we should I don't want to we shouldn't be apart like did you guys like test it out i don't know i didn't watch season one but like did you guys just test out what it'd be like why don't you like rent a place first and see what the long distance no it was the same conversation in season one it's like we're building a house well where are we gonna live we're gonna live in the city well i gotta be at work but i gotta be in the city that's their whole thing so i don't know i don't know how it's gonna work you're geographically um what do you call it incompatible incompatible yeah i think ally needs to give i I think Ellie needs to leave this man.

47:47Ben Mandelker: I think that he's just like hot and he's wealthy. And I'm not saying that she's like shallow like that, but she's like, you know what? I hit the jackpot and I'm not sure I'm ready to give that up, but honestly, you probably will want to because he's going to lose both those things very soon. Well, I hope you get super upset and calls me because Jesse, I love you. Love you. You can wear a bow tie to bed if you want. I don't care. So there's more back and forth about this. So the bow tie gets back in the mix. So he's going to wear the bow tie. cinnamon suspenders are a go the jacket yes but will there be jackets for the groomsmen no jacket for the groomsmen right and she goes he says no jacket for the groomsmen she goes okay he goes oh I was asking but okay she goes oh no that's fine sweet the tension is through the roof yeah I like when Allie goes yeah if Jesse had his way we'd probably gotten married out back in the red barn on the farm but I vetoed that honey your wedding hasn't happened yet yeah that's not been yet be careful it's gonna happen yeah that's true but she made it sound like how that idiot would probably want to get married in the barn and he actually did it's like but i vetoed it but also at the same time like you know who you're marrying too like these guys are obsessed with the farm and you're like if he had his way he'd probably have a wedding on the farm i mean he loves that farm you married a farmer You're going to marry a farmer.

49:13Ben Mandelker: At some point, you also have to acknowledge like what you're getting yourself into. Yeah. Do you think they really work at this farm? Because no one seems competent. They don't see. I don't know if they really work there or if this is just for TV, but they all seem to be like, look at us. We're at a car wash now. They're looking around, waving at people. And they're like, this whole town hates us. Yeah, because you guys are famous. You know, Jesse's really works at like the Scripps Institute in San Diego. He's like, I have no idea what I'm doing here in the Kansas City. so they talk about living in the city versus living in the country and he's like yeah but you know i mean she'll be gone after she gets done with work and then she goes to crossfit and then she gets her nails done then she gets home today but yells at me if i'm at the farm you know those city folk you know how they act classic alley so we see a week ago with jesse and alley uh you know having that conversation about living in separate houses and jesse's like Like, you know, when I work late at the farm, I just don't feel like driving all the way back to the big city.

50:12Ben Mandelker: And she's like, no, I understand. And obviously she doesn't feel like driving up here. Like, there is a world in which maybe you guys get a house that's like maybe in between. Yeah, it should suck for you both. Listen, marriage should suck for you both. So you should both be miserable. It's marriage. Okay. Get a place halfway. So Stephen, then we go to Stephen Jr. at the office. and galena comes in and he's like uh hold on hold on cole's facetiming me now this may be good news hello cole please for the love of god tell me the combine's cutting well i just stuck my wiener in the combine my wiener is hurting lost a nut but at least i lost a nut while everyone in the town was looking at me and seeing that i was a man and they're like hey there's that star quarterback of the football team that had three people on it.

51:03Ben Mandelker: There he is. And I was like, it's me, everyone. But yeah, we got a, yeah, it's all, it's harvesting. It's harvesting. You're saying that it's cutting. It's cutting my wiener. It is cutting my wiener. It hurts. Don't ever try to have a dribble contest with a dribble door. Oh, yeah. I just love seeing a cut lane. Okay. All right. We'll see you guys. All right. I'm going to hang up because I have a script here that I memorized and I have to act it out in front of Galena. Okay. Hey, speaking of which, do you have the loan amount that I need to pay for the bank of Springfield Galena? I do. I do. Yes.

51:45Yes, I do. Okay.

51:47Ben Mandelker: Can you give that to me? Because I'll get that check cut like the combine is cutting the corn. Yes, I'm going to. Yes, I texted Georgina through text message. And I'm just going to get more information on that from Georgina. Did you say Georgina? Yeah, Georgina. Ginger. Ginger. Oh, Ginger, the missing chicken. Yes. Ginger, I texted Ginger. She said, bach, bach. I'm in the stomach of fox. I'm in the stomach of fox. Well, you need to get that check cut because that chicken said she's not going to wait a day longer at the Bank of Springfield. Well, I have another one with him on September 10th. I have a meeting with Fox.

52:38I'm going to offer many chicken for loan.

52:42Ben Mandelker: Wait a second. Tomorrow is September 10th. Is it tomorrow, September 10th? He he he he. He he he. Hmm. hmm how's everything going in your world listen normal i just want to do business just business here sir listen i am the leader of this company and it's fucking weird you not texting our number one chicken at the bank i love that there's two genders in the show one's a chicken and one's a bank lady i know i didn't even connect the dots until we got to the scene and i just started laughing. Chicken fled the coop and became a banker. Chicken now has a little business suit on. Ginger Chicken want money back.

53:29Ben Mandelker: Oh, I'm a bad guy because I gave Chicken a career? Oh, suddenly I'm so bad. Ginger stole my man. She's like, don't even worry about that boss and Steven's like, it seems like she's drunk. So then she's just doing that creepy laugh. She's like, listen to that already September 10th. only a drunk person doesn't know that September 10th is tomorrow

53:59so now Steven is in the farmer with some of the he's in the garage with the farmers and uh he's like so I just talked with Galena in my office I'm 95 % sure she is shit-faced and goes like what do you mean shit-faced like hammered drunk on a Monday at 11 30 in the morning Cole, what do you think? Shit faced. Like that time you got put in jail for being drunk at a bar and mom had to come get you out and she got you out on account that you had a penis. Well, not anymore. That thing got kind of clear cut by the dribble door.

54:30Ben Mandelker: You know, drunk, like the time you climbed into that combine and crashed into the front window of state and liberty. Well, forgive me for saying hello. Why you got to be so commanding? no she's acting drunk knowing what she acts i know what she acts like when she's drunk because when she's sober she knows exactly what's in temper tant is and she knows who ginger is and i think she is shit face as of this minute and i hey guys i want to find out if that's the fact or if i'm just completely off so it sounds like our group of men folk are gonna have to go back into that office and see what we can discover.

55:10So he does. He goes to talk to Galena. She's like, what up? And he's like, well, I don't know how to address this because there's an elephant in the room. Where? Where's elephant? Does Masha own? Because I will kill. Show me elephant. I'm not scared of the fucking elephant. You understand? He he he he.

55:29Ben Mandelker: Okay. No, it's a pink elephant. Are you drunk right now? Galena, have you been drinking? so then uh we see a flashback steven asked jesse and cole to go check the office for alcohol so then we cut back to galena she's like uh no and galena has well she's like no no i'm not but then steven's like well then why was there a cold bottle of wine in your trash because of course if you were drinking on the job you're gonna bring a bottle of chilled wine into your office drink it Leave it in the trash. And you'll also have a little bottle of like, like Nantucket Nectars or whatever with like orange juice and vodka.

56:13Ben Mandelker: And that you're going to leave half half full in the trash, too. You won't pour it down any drain. So they're like Alina takes care of herself, though. You know, that's a way to be an alcoholic at work. Like she's not she's not just drinking like little airline bottles out of her backpack. You know, she's like fully she's got like a little chiller under her desk. She's like, I'm just doing it right. She's like, they're like, wait a minute. I found a martini glass with a little paper umbrella in it. She's like living in that. Wait a minute. There was a pina colada machine in Galena's office. when i was when i was in eighth grade um i took like a little playwriting class or something and i wrote a play and like as part of the play someone was like really upset about something and they're like i'm good and they were talking about like yeah i was so upset upset i went out last night and i got drunk like how much what did you drink i had 25 shots of vodka teacher was like that's a lot and that's what this scene reminds me of like oh i am upset i have glass of i have bottle of wine in my trash because i am so upset and drinking on job

57:23guys galena had all the ingredients for an espresso martini plus three espresso beans in her trash can

57:32Ben Mandelker: she honored the tradition okay which is more than we can say for the espresso martinis at pinky's lounge in las vegas

57:43guys there was a um smoker there was a drink smoker in galena's trash she was smoking up

57:50Ben Mandelker: something called buzz buds so guys she's been drinking on the job i found a full scorpion bowl and the center was still on fire with 151 rum. There was a beer bong in Galena's trash can. It's like, Jesus!

58:08Ben Mandelker: I think she's been drinking. Gosh, I looked at Galena's trash can. There was a champagne fountain in there. A full champagne fountain. Well, I looked. Yep, there was an ice liege. It was in the shape of the peacock logo. Ice liege. It was an ice liege that we were supposed to have in McCarvest. So he's like, have you been drinking? Do not lie to me. Do not lie to me, Galena. She's like, this is crazy. You stop it. Let me get up from chair. Whoa, Galena got up from chair. That was hard. He's like, you are not going to drive right now. She's like, no, I'm not driving. I'm done. I'm done with all of this.

58:49I'm done with all of this. I'm going to blend something up. Pina or bloody?

58:56Ben Mandelker: Don't worry. I am not going to drive. No, seriously, Cole ran over my car with a combine earlier this morning. We call it the karma combine. And he's like, listen, I love you, and I care about you, Galena, and I want to help. But that is not okay. That is not only dad can be drunk at work. Okay? She's like, oh, nothing is okay. None of it is okay. You think it's okay? The fact is really, my friend. Do you know how I feel after all of that? It's like a piece of thing. A piece of thing. A piece of garbage. Nobody even knows remotely what I went through. You guys don't know what your dad told me.

59:35And, you know, look, you shouldn't be getting drunk at work and messing up and stuff. But these guys are really just letting their dads off with everything. Their dad totally screwed this chick over. Was their dad honest? Yes. I'm going to date other people. But he still led this chick on. And they're just like, what? Why isn't she acting just normal two days after work? You guys are lucky that this is all she's doing. I'm saying it again.

59:58Ben Mandelker: Well, but if she were on Below Deck, we'd be like, shut the fuck up and do your job also. Let's be honest. Well, this isn't Below Deck. This is McBee, where you know Cole's drunk at work if he's ever even really there. Or stoned or something. And that dad is such a mess, he's about to go to prison. And you know his ass was drunk all the time at work. Yeah. It's not Below Deck. It's below corn. So Kalina is like, you know, I thought we were going to be, you know, spending the rest of lives together. watching chickens not get murdered. I want to look at that. All we wanted was to stay together and watch Ginger grow up to have a good life.

1:00:36Ben Mandelker: We were so happy we got Ginger into Chicken MBA program and now look to see what happened. She go to Chicken Wharton. So then Stephen Junior was like, look, I love my dad as dad, but as a husband and as a boyfriend, wait, your dad is your husband? No. Wait, your boyfriend is dad? So you were cheating on him for me too? What? What sort of fucked up incestuous family is this? Gay incestuous. No, no, no, no. Stop that. By the way, you just said gay. We're not supposed to say gay. We promised. Promised the mayor. Right? We said, Mayor, we will fix your mansion from Cole's combine accent as long as as long as we never say gay um actually guess the mayor said that to us so this is his ammo okay and i'm not just saying that because we're in missouri so stephen's like i came to this conversation pissed off but as i'm looking at her and i'm seeing her pain in her eyes i understand that she is a human being and that i am pissed off at a human being not just a chicken and she's been through a lot the last few months and i know a good person i know what a good person she is and how productive and how valuable she is to our companies plus she knows all where the but the bodies are buried and the FBI are coming.

1:01:52Ben Mandelker: So yeah, I'm just going to be nice for now. Also, I looked into her eyes and I'm terrified now. Those are some scary, scary demon eyes. She's just looking back at him like, he, he, he, he. And he's like, okay, well, this is going to fucking change. This is not okay. All right. Now, let me tell you, I should run every AA meeting because people come in there and I'm going to just tell them right to their face, you better stop this. You better stop it right now. Yeah, that's what he does. Stop it. He's like, look, the alcohol is not going to help. It's just a Band-Aid on a fucking bullet hole. I'm surprised Tessa did not pop her head and say, now, just for the record, I have patched up many a bullet hole with a Band-Aid.

1:02:29Ben Mandelker: So why don't you think about that a little bit more before you say those sort of things? Where do these things even come from?

1:02:38So then we go over to Cole and Steven talking about the fields. They've harvested 10 and there's 83 to go. so they're talking about that and then they talk about the house getting fucked up by Galena and he's like speaking of Masha and Galena what the hell are we going to do with them and Cole's like well I think Masha's made it pretty clear she's not going anywhere near her dad and her aren't breaking up so we want them to be friends I mean what's the end goal here and he's like well I guess we just need to make sure they're not threatening to hire hitmen for each other's chickens okay well it's a good start

1:03:17Ben Mandelker: jesse's like hey it really gets really coming to this point hasn't it we can't tell if they won't show up you know so they're like cole's like yeah but my masha's gonna be so mad at us if we don't tell her so well that's your girl that's your problem all right you know i never thought i'd be trying to break up a fight between two wild russian women especially 40 year olds that are my dad's girlfriends but kalina's got to look at what she's done i make changes huh you just broke a tractor cole let's not talk about everybody thinking about what they've done right now okay sir so um they're gonna get these two together these crazy kids together and speaking of crazy kids who's this new lady with a new haircut new haircut who dis it's yeah hey is that alanis more set with a bob no it's brooke it's brooke so she meets up with steven and he's like whoa whoa sorry sorry about the other night first of all that concert or whatever because when we got in the elevator i didn't say hello but i didn't recognize it was you i mean who is this lady with new hair i mean i love the new hair by the way it's like oh it's okay you know i mean it is over between me and your dad i've been happier than i've ever been you know a happy person when they get their hair into a pop and that's just what i've done that is just what i've done i got my hair cut down over at um at um objection and law and um i decided i could do better they do great work oh that's funny because i got my hair done i got my hair done at fantastic uncle sam's

1:05:00so double taxes i got double text on that one but like you know what you know it'll be fun for

1:05:06Ben Mandelker: the viewing audience another scene with someone who has a relationship with my father but not a scene with my father okay so um like i mean how many like yeah i get that steven senior is not on the show and that's fine and i get that we have to wrap up some loose ends from last season for the people who watched season one, but like, there's so much talk about the dad and his relationships and what's going on. You have so many surrogates for the dad. I'm like, I think it's time to start moving on from the dad at this point, because I think they could too, because they already wrapped up Brooke last season.

1:05:38They broke up last season. This is nothing new. Like she, he broke up with her and she's like, well, I'm sorry that you have to deal with someone like Galena. I'm real sorry for that. Good luck to you. Good luck. So Stephen's waxing up. I don't, I don't know why we need to see Brooke.

1:05:53Ben Mandelker: Yeah. So Stephen's like waxing poetic. He's like, you know, I've always had a certain level of respect for Brooke. I mean, here she is, a woman with long hair who got short hair. That's strong because she had strength to leave and not look back. I wonder if she has the strength to fix a tractor because I think Cole just broke another one. That's what I hear. um and he's like yeah you know i get caught up too caught up in things you know uh sometimes it's 8 30 at night and i'm still talking about what happened that day like cole losing his penis to a nibble dripper but you know sometimes i just i need to solve problems but sometimes i need to learn that that's a fault you know there have been things i've said about calla whenever we've had fights and things just go downhill so fast especially when you have a combine his brakes are cut and it's just going downhill very fast.

1:06:41Ben Mandelker: I mean, we really have to get Galena. We need to fix this Galena situation. I mean, if she cut the brake lines on that combine one more time, someone's going to get killed. Yeah, and Brooke's like, yeah, you know, that's just what happens in these relationships. And you need to realize sometimes that you need to really find a married person that can treat you better. You need to find a person who's in a committed, or you need to find a person who's already in a relationship who will treat you right. That's what you need. That's what I've done. I've found the happiest person in another relationship that I've ever found it's going to work out great I'm sure she's like you know I thought once I turned 40 who wants me I'm just an old dish rag right just put me out to pasture just put me in a cornfield and have that combine run right over me but it turns out someone did find value in me and now I do have value he's like yeah well I'm starting to see that maybe the McB men are a little bit of the problem you know it's so funny because after season one when everyone was watching the show and saying those b-men suck i thought yeah i agree those women do suck but then it turns out they were talking about when they said the man they meant the man they weren't just joking on saying the women it's us we're the problem it's me um so basically that's the scene like who cares okay so then we go to steven and galena he's checking on her she's like i'm just checking on the washers he's like well how are the washers doing you know they're going are you drunk no Okay.

1:08:03You want to go for a drive? I'm going to test you. Okay. Do you want me to say alphabet to backwards again? That was a miss. I'm not going to ask you to do that again. Z, nine, chicken, 13, seven.

1:08:17Ben Mandelker: All right. Let's get in the car. All right, Kalina, we're going to go to beverages more. You hop in. Oh, I am already in the back seat. All right. All right. They're going to head over to the lodge. Okay. And you know why? Because Masha's at the lodge right now. She goes, no. No, she is not. And he's like, whatever you got to say to Masha, we're going to say it because tomorrow is going to be the first day of us moving forward and putting this shit behind us while Masha is living in your house with wet dog treats. OK, come on. Masha's like a battle. She's like, I'm so nervous. My heart is pounding right now.

1:08:49Ben Mandelker: And I just got a letter from Harvard Business School saying that we owe thirty three thousand dollars in tuition for Ginger. And I'm like, what is happening? I thought Ginger is dead. okay well you're worried to bump into her well this is why this is good because you guys are going to see each other for the first time right now it's a controlled environment listen if you can if you can trust anybody to break something up this bad it's me i broke a tractor that was good it was in a bad situation i broke it you lady folk with your lady issues you can work it out because you're in the presence of man and men are calm and controlled and aren't emotional it's a controlled environment so you can work out your stupid lady issues and we're going to laugh in your faces and everything will be fixed.

1:09:35And Galena back in the car is like, I brought her here as friend. I invite her for Christmas. I brought her kid presents. I invited her to all outings and travels and things like this. And this is how everybody say no good deed goes on then. Right. So I trusted someone to at least be, you know, a friend. And he's like, oh, yeah, you know, I think you should tell her that. Tell her that. Just say it candidly. You know, one of the things we have a problem with with you, Galena, is you're just not candid.

1:10:07Ben Mandelker: She's like, I don't care about candy. I just want alcohol. No. So he's basically like, we got to get this fixed because she owns the company. She's the most important person, whatever. so galena's like i you know i have not respect for backstabber betrayer snake i work hard it's beneath myself to speak to somebody like that i don't even bother say for horror prostitute prostitute sluts how's life in slutsville you stupid prostitute buttface die in fire prostitute so i do so much for her they're you know they're trying to hype the girls up like you're the biggest person here no you're going to be the big person so now they both get together and they're like hello hello and then jesse puts a football helmet on all right this is cole speaking now before i bleed out through my penis from the combine incident i just want you guys to try to talk it out and get it solved okay so we're gonna just make sure everything goes good okay so So Masha is like, hello.

1:11:11Ben Mandelker: Well, you know, I stay here to see you. Because Galena's like, what are you doing here? I stay here to see you. She's like, well, I don't want to see you. She's like, well, then you can go back. Go back where? To wherever you come from. Oh, you go back. Freaking backstabbing prostitute slut bitch. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Let's just try to figure out a solution here, guys. That's why we're here. Okay, let's try again. Galena, you go ahead. I invited you. Okay, you're pretending to be my friend. I invited you here for Christmas. I took you in. I gave your chicken its first calculator and this is the way you thank me.

1:11:44Like she goes, I took you to dinners because you're nobody.

1:11:51She even goes, okay, okay. Let's be solution oriented here. Okay, let's do that. And Glenn is like, okay, well, I introduced you to everybody. And the next thing, backstab, oh, my back, my back is a stab from Masha. And she goes, I'm not sure I backstab. And she goes, are you kidding me? You did not sleep with Steve while I was living here? She's like, oh, first of all, you wanted to date a married guy when you met him. How about that? How about that?

1:12:19Ben Mandelker: She's like, no, I wasn't. No, I wasn't. Oh, he wasn't married by then? No, he actually lives separate, you know, separate. I mean, like, same bed as wife and married in the same house, but separate, technically. She would post in a different room than him. And it's like, oh, so you live separate or was divorced? And she goes, he did not tell me. And so Cole's like, Steve has a person he wants living here, living here. So we just need to all move on from the situation. Do we understand this? No, no, I don't. I don't want to talk about this anymore. I did not. I just want to say I did not kill your chickens.

1:12:58Ben Mandelker: Oh, yes, you did. I cannot see them. I cannot find them. I'm assuming it was you because it was only you who was keeping up this stuff. I mean, do you live in your own world? Do you live in your horror world? Is that where you live? Horror world? Horror world. I love the idea that this place is called horror world. Come to horror world for all your horror needs. All your horror needs. Today, two for one. The high heels made out of clear plastic. You can see it clear right through. Don't get your fingerprints on them, you dumb whore. 50 % off. Look for us around the corner from State of Liberty and just down the street.

1:13:36Ben Mandelker: From objection and law. Objection. Your neighborhood hairstylist. So Mosh is like, this is not going to go anywhere. She's not right, mind. I mean, you need to see a specialist because I don't need to have you tell me what I need to do. Horshalist. Okay. You need to see a horse list. Okay. You know what? I'm so damn tired of dealing with relationships that are not mine and a business where we are struggling every single day to make. We are$7 million trillion in debt. All right. All right. All I want. Oh, okay. I just want Galena to be. Okay. You have a vagina in your armpit. Has anybody ever told you?

1:14:15I look at your armpits. I see vagina there. How about just the penises in that armpit? All right.

1:14:20Ben Mandelker: Cole, Cole, could you jump in here? All right. I'm Cole here. I was a star quarterback and 15 years ago. You can act like this here. Not like, like this. Do not, don't act like anything, affect anything. Come the other day. Cause this better be not another blackout day. Cause there better be nine on top of that situation. I've lost a lot of blood. I got to say, do we have a hospital in this town? Come on. Cole, business never went off track. So I guess I'm confused about that. When did business go off track? There was no business off track. And so then we see flashback to three days ago when she was drinking at work.

1:14:50And she's like, okay, well, this conversation with Masha made me realize she definitely has no intention to apologize. So she has no remorse. So enjoy wet dog treats because I still have key. I have key and I have crowbar. and this is all all galena need so they're like okay well that didn't go so well so then steven

1:15:14Ben Mandelker: takes galena back to the office and then uh jesse and steven just sit down and make a sandwich so then that's great so they're like well that was pointless and cole's like yeah there was nothing that got accomplished galena what's going on with her man this gotta end like like i mean If she can't move on with this situation and put the business first, then she has got to go. Yeah, but we need her. We need her in this business. And Jesse's like, do you think that, you know, just because you knew her before and how she was before, that's kind of clouding your judgment on how she is now? I mean, is she a bow tie or is she a volo tie?

1:15:50Don't think about it before you answer. Think about it before you answer. Hey, okay, I thought about it.

1:15:56Ben Mandelker: Are we open to an ascot? No. As easy as it is to say, just cut her off and get rid of her, there's a lot going on behind the scenes that, well, we need her. She knows a lot of shit about our company is that we're running perfectly legally. Ascot sounds pretty homosexual. Sounds pretty homosexual. Why would they name a tie about getting into a car and having your ass grabbed? What do we do about Kalina? What do we do? and cole's like well i can tell you what would happen if i was in charge there'd be consequences you would have been fired 10 years ago cole get the fuck out of here you would have at least been fired this episode for that tractor bullshit so he's like you don't wish he changes or or she's out of here yeah and and and i'm watching i'm like oh okay it's the cliffhanger is what are they gonna do about galena but just kidding the show continues on so now we go to kansas city big city where Ali's there going to swanky parties, doing city things, shopping, shopping, shopping but it's not an Ali scene, it's Steven and Steven and Kala they sit outside a restaurant and Steven's like, wow Kala, that's the most western thing you've ever worn, I love it and she's like, yeah, wow you're pulling the chair out for me and everything, you would think this is a date it's funny because we're like not together right now, right?

1:17:21Ben Mandelker: Right America? Okay. He's like, yeah, she doesn't have an apartment in Dallas yet. So now she's in a condo in Kansas City. So he's like, it's such a nice day. I actually took both dogs up on the farm. We were playing with the chickens. It's too soon. Oh, Ginger. I know. Stop mentioning that. Like, we're still mourning over here. Yeah. So they get some skinny margs and he's going to help her with her Dallas apartment because she's like, yeah, Dallas apartment is like so expensive. Get a fucking job, Cali. You're not married to this man. What the hell? Why does he have to pay for everything? She's like, well, because I thought I was going to live with him.

1:17:58So now I have to pay for my apartment. No.

1:18:00Ben Mandelker: Yeah. Drive Uber. Okay. Work at, it's called work at McDonald's, work anywhere. Okay. Don't have this man fund your apartment. Yeah. Yeah. So she's like, well, at this point, I put three years of my life into living in Gallatin. I saw your tweet where you said, she said she put three years of her life living in Gallatin. I feel like I put four into watching this show. No, I was like, she put three years into Gallant and I put, I put four hours into watching this show and I have it worse.

1:18:30Ben Mandelker: So she's like, she's like, look, I think I deserve something. Yeah. You deserve a metal for biggest dummy. Like she's, you deserve nothing for your choices. Okay. You put in your time, you got life experience out of it. You moved to Dallas, knock on Leon Locken's door. I'm sure she has a spare bed in there and just started, new life but i'm confused because i didn't think she was living in gallatin this whole she hasn't been living in gallatin for three years because the whole first year she kept coming up to visit and she would they would only get each other for like a weekend at a time and that was the big plot line like is she ever going to move here so she hasn't been here for three years she's crazy she's she's crazy she's full of it stupid cala so then cal i think she got rid of her apartment fairly recently to make a go of it but you know it's not like it wasn't i don't want to hear it cala yeah i hear it okay because you had your you were given an exit path and you come crawling back get a job get out of this place don't complain about gallatin and then come back to it because that's right now yeah i'm sorry also it's the person that we're all friends with in our girlfriend groups that's like oh my god you guys we all need to have a night because i'm totally breaking up with them girl power and you're all like buying cosmos for each other and you're like we're girls and Ronnie's kind of one.

1:19:47So, yay. And we're like, don't ever go back to him, girl. Like that friend who's like, don't you ever go back to that loser. And here's what we need to make sure that he ain't paying for your apartment because that needs to just be you. She's like, yeah, girl, power. And then literally the next day, he paid for my apartment still.

1:20:04Ben Mandelker: Yeah. No, I said the exact same thing last week. I was like, she's one that makes you, yeah. Because it's so obvious. I'm not saying your point is, I'm saying like, he's so. one note like she's like she is that person where then you get excited that you get your friend back and she you take her out you do this whole thing and you're like fuck steven yeah just cheers to steven fuck him rearview mirror and then next day like so steven and i are back together but i think he's really gonna change this like oh fuck this girl honestly yeah so um he's like well i've been dealing with the russians you know and she's like i mean those women are both a fucking psychotic And he's like, yeah, my mom is actually going to put together a family trip to the Ozarks.

1:20:48You know, and a lot of us are going out there, you know, even Uncle Jimmy and Aunt Darla.

1:20:53Ben Mandelker: So Uncle Jimmy and Aunt Darla. The big trip. Uncle Jimmy, Aunt Darla, life of the party. You want to come? You have any interest? She's like, well, as long as you think that it'll be OK. Did your family even say anything about me coming? Did your mom invite me? He's like, yeah, they asked me. It just makes me a little nervous. I don't want any drama to happen. If I get down there and people are being assholes to me, I'm leaving and then coming back right away to be on television. He's like, well, I'll make sure there's no drama. She goes, well, it does sound fun. Like getting away would be really nice.

1:21:30And I would like love to hang out with everyone. Those fucking hillbilly fucks, fat, stupid hillbilly fucks.

1:21:36Ben Mandelker: What is she getting away from? because as far as we can tell she has not she refuses to get away from steven and as far as i can also tell she has no job so i don't know what she's trying to get away from because yeah i'm not really sure yeah he's trying to get away from that friend like are you back together with him yet so she's like are you gonna go are you gonna let loose a little bit he's like we'll see probably i might even say the gay word i mean the g word i mean the pretend i never said anything so for dinner and the preacher's like honestly Steven are you and Kala sleeping together still he's like uh the house are all dots so then back at the condo she's he's packing his guitar god Steven please don't say you're that fucking guy at the party who's like whipping out the guitar oh god just let Donny Osmond do what Donny Osmond does don't bring your guitar too.

1:22:30Ben Mandelker: Please don't. You know he only knows the G and he's trying to sing every song in one chord. Like, Stephen, stop. Stop. So the family's going down to Lake of the Ozarks and this is where we used to have a house. We used to all go to summer long and hang out and there were so many good times and so many good memories. I can't wait to have Cala see it for the first time. This is going to be a fun few days. Days, days, days. So they go down there and everyone's expecting a fight. So let's see what happens 24 hours later partying casey and cole are fighting kala's fighting with cole steven jr's fighting with kala kala's leaving to be continued my question is did they invite tessa down to the part to the ozarks because she deserves she's the one who deserves a break she's the one in that garage inspecting dribble doors and doing word documents and flyers and sticking them up everywhere she's the one who needs a little time at the wing tessa let me tell you something hey you're a lot of things in this family but one thing you want is blood you ain't coming to the olzark

1:23:40all right everybody thanks so much for being with us we will talk to you the next time

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