#2966 McBee Dynasty S02E07: Stupid Spice

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1:53Ben Mandelker: Watch What Crappens

1:58Ben Mandelker: truly love I am Ben Mandelker and joining me today the one the only a man who would never crash a combine while going through town Mr. Ronnie Karen hi Ronnie well hello I wouldn't be so sure about that last part give me access to one and we'll see we are here to talk about McBee Dynasty before we do that just a reminder that this coming Monday we have an Amazon live moment that we'll be doing where we'll be talking about who knows what, but we'll talk about items that we have bought and loved. And we just have our little shopping moment there. So come join us for that. And thank you to everyone who came last night to Crappy Hour.

2:41Ben Mandelker: So basically for the next few weeks, it's going to alternate on Mondays between Crappy Hour and Amazon Live. So essentially, you'll just get to see us live in some way or another. So come join us for those. And Patreon, patreon.com slash watch for crappins where you get our weekly bonus episodes we'll record one later this week and access to crappins on demand where you can watch us not just listen all those videos are there and then they eventually make their way to youtube but if you want them fresh and hot and sexy and cool then go to patreon um that's the news ronnie ronnie what did you think about McBee Dynasty heading to Nashville for a cast trip.

3:23This damn show tricked me. I really thought they made it look like Cole cheats. But you know what? I will say I was wrong. All of us were wrong because we listened to the damn preview. We should know better now from Bravo. But I will say you're still a piece of shit that everybody believes that so easily. You know? So I'm not taking you back. I'm not taking back my piece of shit comments. Cole.

3:44Ben Mandelker: Yeah, you let them know. yeah Cole he didn't cheat it was a very exciting turn of events on a very exciting episode they went to Nashville and they came back and they still had 10 minutes left in the episode so really so much happened why don't we dive right into it we have Tessa we saw McBee Dynasty Jesse and Ali are finally getting hitched and that's exciting and we see the flashback to steven you know pestering jesse to get a prenup you know i guess we'll see kayla went back to dallas where she could be a slut in a different state stupid bitch and i suspect this time it's for good and if it's not it will be for good because i got a golf club in my back seat and i'm gonna use it then call up and left the farm during harvest It's for Casey's baby moon.

4:40Really pissing Steven off. I mean, who does he think women are anyway? And even though boss man ain't at the farm, his game of Russian roulette continues. And it just cuts to Galena holding a gun to a chicken's head. It's like spinning the wheel. Like, okay. Ginger's like, listen here, Ginger. Do you regret going to Masha instead of me? Click. Oh, you got lucky this time, you chicken bitch.

5:13Ben Mandelker: galena's stupid chuckle um

5:22those eyes those piercing eyes she goes

5:26Ben Mandelker: i see them in my sleep i cannot believe this is actually happening so um that was the craziness of mcbee dynasty so by the way for all of you who are wondering what the fuck happened with that combine at the end of last episode when a wheel came flying off of it into the road and could have killed someone if anyone had been driving that road guess what you'll never get to know because we never went back to it because as we all remember last week's episode was like how could cole do this how we're in the middle of harvest How could a cold leaving leave in the middle of harvest? And this week is, well, we're going to go have to try some spices in Nashville.

6:08Ben Mandelker: So everyone leaves.

6:13He's such a hypocrite. And it is funny watching him slowly morph into his father, you know, because he really is becoming that man. He's like, well, you can't do it, but I can. And you can't go out for a baby move. We can all go for a boy's trip, which you're going to get in trouble for. I'm going to go try and ruin everybody's relationship. So I'm not the only single person in this family. I mean, it's just exactly what his dad does, you know, every single time. So, guys, you know where I want to go? And I hope you want to go, too, because we're about to go there. The Farm Fulfillment Center.

6:45Get in the wagon.

6:47Ben Mandelker: Have you ever wondered how we fulfill all those dribble doors? You go to the Farm Fulfillment Center.

6:55This is where farms go. It's also where we drop off the babies that the women are going to start dropping. You ready for your baby? Come get it. The Farm Fulfillment Center. That's what boss man would like.

7:05Ben Mandelker: The Farm Fulfillment Center, which is where farms go when they're feeling low on self-esteem and they come out feeling great. Farm Fulfillment. It's not your fault, farm. Yeah, but I've always wanted to kick Cole's ass and they healed it at first. They had to go out of town to get it done. It's not your fault, farm. I just gave such a bad crop of corn. You know, I've only given 150 bushels and I just feel, I don't know, I feel like I would give more bushels if I just felt more fulfilled. Do you have an activity for me? How many bushels do I give and I don't even receive a peck in return? Well, it's not.

7:37Life isn't a song, guys, and dolls farm. Okay. All right. I feel more fulfilled. Thank you.

7:45Ben Mandelker: Sometimes a farm can catch a cold. So Stephen is packing boxes of beef because he's really pushing this meat thing. although good luck to anyone who buys meat from these jokers they can't even seem to send one piece of brisket down to Kansas City for a barbecue idiots good luck to all the people who are buying meat with too much fat cut off as we just learned from the last episode people are just going to be getting discards from Cole's house like an old Tasmanian devil t-shirt wait a second I thought I ordered meat oh we're so bad sorry we thought you said you wanted a Tasmanian devil t-shirt that's my bad that one's on me I'm sorry, we ordered meat and there was a spilled Big Gulp in the box.

8:33Yeah, it was Cole. That must have been Cole's day at work. That is why we don't do baby moons in the middle of harvest. We are harvesting cows, Cole.

8:42Ben Mandelker: It's a meat harvest.

8:46Ben Mandelker: Oh, God. So, Cole. So, yes, they're really like, this is them really trying to shill their meat business. I was tempted to buy some meat from them just to see how bad it was. But then I was like, no, I'm not going to support these people. So, yeah, I'll get meat locally. But, yeah, they're just shipping meat all around. Well, the McBee Meat Company is our own farm-raised beef and pork grown here. And lately, we've been shipping meat boxes out like crazy with the upcoming holidays. there's high demand we even shipped one to a baby moon i said finally an appropriate use of meats thank you pregnant people you want a meat box look no further than the mcbee meat box we grow all our pork with natural fertilizer because nothing gives nothing gives good pork like a like a mcbee pork flour they blossom in pure missouri sunlight one thing i think of often and I don't even know why, is how excited Steven was when they got the meat truck.

9:52He's like, I'm driving around the meat truck. It says McBean meat. It's just a big guy driving around a truck that's completely covered in McBean meat where meat gets its meat. Those even more cows would order their meat. Hey, you know what our meat's last wish was on their last meal request? Meat from McBean meat.

10:11Ben Mandelker: I wish it was like the Oscar Mayer wiener truck except they just built out to make it look like a big, like a big ribeye, like on its side, just driving along, just driving a ribeye. It's a tomahawk. It's like you can't fit any passengers in the back. They're like, damn it, we shouldn't have chosen the tomahawk. I can't even get, I can't even get any meat in the back of this truck. Just a big bone. Padma's in there also being like, where do hot dogs come from? Who did we steal meat from? To the nation she drove in that. I will always remember her driving along in the Oscar Mayer Reno truck being like, Why are there hot dogs in Milwaukee?

10:54The oppressed burrito. Let's check in. Burrito, how are you feeling today? Do you feel kidnapped from your own country? Yes, I do. I'm very oppressed. That was the best burrito interview everybody's ever done. Everybody, that's a wrap. No pun intended, burrito. Wow.

11:12Ben Mandelker: So, Stephen. Wow. Wow. That's Stephen doing Padma. Stephen's like, so how is the baby moon cold? Because while you were relaxing, the rest of us were in the combines focusing on the harvest. I was like, no, you weren't in the combines. You were standing around the combines because it had flipped over and a wheel had gone down the hillside. Those combines were going nowhere and there was no harvest. None of you were driving combines. Let's not pretend to work when we know you don't. Watching the NFL combine. so well my phone was on do not disturb because i was a baby moon you know you never really know you've really never known excitement until you've shown somebody a mountain for the first time you know it's funny because his phone was on do not disturb while my life was on disturbed watching cole's face i swear to god it's like a haunted tree stump i cannot look at him anymore

12:02right well you're becoming a traveler and i was going to nashville so what do you think of that So you're going to have to put that in your schedule. Put that in your schedule and smoke it. Okay, pretend your schedule's a pipe. Do that. He's like, I ain't losing. Well, it's an actual business trip, okay? We got to go throw some spices in with these packages. So we're going to go look at custom spices, which you can only get by driving to Nashville, Tennessee. Do you understand? The mail system doesn't work out of Nashville. They can't send the samples, okay? What are we going to have for samples of samples?

12:29What are we, losers, Cole?

12:32Ben Mandelker: It is physically impossible to send spices in the mail. You are the most pessimistic person I've ever met to talk about spices, okay? Yes, you can send meat, but you cannot send spices. Everyone knows this cold. I'm kidding with it. So Jesse is going to have to go too. So he's like, here we go. We have a history with Nashville that includes us making poor choices. And I've got a wedding coming up in a few weeks. I'm supposed to be doing all that stuff I'm doing for the wedding right now, which is nothing really, except wondering what maroon is. I love them acting like there's a lot of decisions to be made about this wedding.

13:10Ben Mandelker: We all know what it's going to be. They're going to go into that generic event space that they use this very episode to have a baby shower. They're going to just put some flowers up. All the ranch hands, that creepy guy Jake, who may be like, I don't know. He's going to be in charge of putting everything up. They're not going to lift a finger. They're going to make all their employees do everything. Tessa will be like, it'll be my honor. I've raised these boys and I want to put a flower on the wall to celebrate them. they're gonna do all the work they're not gonna do a single thing they're not gonna do a thing yeah we know to be on the farm ali's gonna be like why is jake throwing meth at the birds they're gonna die you can't throw a bird they're acting like they have to like secure like a deposit to get john legend to perform at this thing no you're all gonna be in the backyard with the banjo playing yeah tess is gonna be like some side love It's like a river.

14:02Ben Mandelker: Cause tonight is a real good night. I hope you dance. I hope you dance. Alright, I want everyone to get on the dance floor. Alright. Love Shake. I put a brick into his side And I scratched his car Of his four wheel drive Cause we're going To the WAMCA Come on everyone I'm sorry That is too gay Not this way Not anymore We took it back Just because Jesse has become a gay icon In Ronnie's life does not mean that he's gay enough to get this song out his way. Please. I love Tessa just being a one-woman band. She is. Didn't you see the one where they're like, oh, that's Tessa. You know, Tessa can sing.

15:01And Tessa's like, yeah, sure I do. I would sing with my mama. I would sing with my papa. And I hear no more. These boys, these boys, do a birthday party for me. So I'm going to sing. Amazing Christ. I was like, oh, no. Ladies and gentlemen. Your father didn't just roll over in his grave. He knocked on the lid and said, shut the fuck up, Tessa. Jesus, how far do I got to run?

15:26Ben Mandelker: Ladies and gentlemen, for our wedding, we are honored to introduce our entertainment for the evening. It's Tessa Lawler and the Dribbledores. Hey, everyone. Who's ready to party? Shout, everybody go shout. A little bit louder now. A little bit louder now. A little bit louder now. A little bit louder now. My baby loves the hunky-punky. My baby loves a hanky-panky. Don't blame it on the sunshine. Don't blame it on the moonlight. Don't blame it on the combine. Don't blame it on the boogie. Let's go back to the fulfillment center. So, Stephen's like, I'm sure Alex will be fine with her trip to Nashville.

16:05Tell her it's about spy samples. Well, this close to the wedding, she'll kill me. and cole's like well i literally promised casey i'd get my act together and cut back on the drinking but nashville will make me miss her maternity photo shoot was all supposed to be my paternity photo shoot so you're gonna miss your paternity mater what is she supposed to eat

16:27Ben Mandelker: pickles alone in that photo i know honestly i know this will upset casey but really see it as a blessing in disguise because when you guys are divorced in about two years do you really want to see that guy in the golden sunlight looming over your baby? No, you don't. I think cornfields is a better option. Yeah. Taking pictures alone in a cornfield is a better option for sure. Your baby won't have to ask questions later. Who's that guy? It's the postman, honey. It's the postman.

17:03Ben Mandelker: So then Stephen's saying like, well, she'll be all right with it. And Jesse goes, If you're so confident, you should give them both a call because the producer said that's what we have to do in this scene. It's like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. So Stephen calls Casey and he's like, hey, Casey, it's Stephen. Yeah. Well, guess what? I'm calling because I'm taking Cole and Jesse to what it's about on meat shipments. And we decided it would be a good idea to have a complimentary product of sending it out along. So we're going to get spices. We're going to go find out about spices. And unfortunately, the only place in America that has spices is in Nashville.

17:35Ben Mandelker: So unfortunately, we have to go there and take Cole there, too. I love this sentence. Hey, Casey, I'm here talking to Cole and Jesse about meat shipments. Okay. Lose my fucking number, bro. Okay. So Casey's like, oh, so Cole wants to go to Nashville. Well, no, Stephen wants me to go. I don't want to go there. Oh, is he going to go regardless if I say no? Well, you could say no, and then we won't have to find out. You know, if you don't say no, we won't have to find out if I make him disobey you and choose between his family business and some girl he got impregnated in a cornfield. So how about that, Casey?

18:10Huh? Hey, Casey, do you want your baby to have milk in its mouth? Or would you rather it have no spices? Those are your options.

18:18Ben Mandelker: I was hoping that it would have what monster of energy drink in its mouth personally. So he's like, whatever. So she's like, whatever. And hangs up on him. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial. August is the perfect time to hit reset before the autumn rush begins, and honestly, I can't think of a better place to start than my closet. That's why I love shopping at Quince. Quince is all about fewer, better pieces. Their clothes are made with premium materials built to last and designed to become the one you reach for every day. Quince specializes in everyday staples that work harder, like their ultra-soft organic cotton teas and premium Mongolian cashmere sweaters.

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21:58Ben Mandelker: That's article.com slash crappens for$50 off your first purchase of$100 or more. So now we go to Stephen's house And he's putting away pictures of him and Calla And sad music's playing like I was a cowboy once But now I'm just a man in a hat Without my woman here to give me love Where's my truck? Why can't I get love in my mind? Where's my truck? Where's my truck? it's a great song great song I love it I love it so he's like this is the longest I've gone without talking to Calla since we first started dating it just feels like I'm missing something I can't talk to my family about it because they got their own stuff going on I mean you got Cole he's still trying to learn how to grasp onto a straw without lips got Jesse his wife is living in the big city they even sell newspapers on the street where she's at he doesn't know how to deal with that she's getting something called manicures and pedicures i don't know what a manny is or a petty and i don't know why they need to be cured but it's some city thing i can't even talk to those people you know can't even talk to the meat it doesn't even have enough fat on it to be respect worthy so it's just me a cowboy alone in his house poor lonely steven stuck without cala Wow.

23:31Ben Mandelker: So they're going to go that they start this this stupid trip and Steven picks up the guys and everything. And then Allie calls and she's like, hi, hi. Casey's upset. Cole needs to call her. So what a surprise. She's upset. And Allie's like, maybe you should have been trying to stay back to with your fiance, by the way, that you're getting married to in two weeks. I'm mad. Yeah. So, I mean, look, he's, you don't even live in the same house. Like, who cares? Like, literally, who cares? So, Jesse's like, well, Casey let it slip to Allie that we were going to Nashville. So, maybe it's not the best way for her to find out.

24:13Yeah. You should have told your, you should have told your fucking wife. I guess. You probably figured you didn't have to tell her because she's not going to be at the same house anyway, maybe. I don't know. I think you should. Coming up with excuses for Jesse. I just love him. I don't care. I love him so much.

24:28Ben Mandelker: I think you should tell your significant other if you're going on a trip somewhere. So Stephen's like, well, guess what? We really do have meetings. Okay. We're sampling spices. Okay. We're going to be going to a Kroger out there and open up the McCormick jars and sticking our fingers in and seeing which one we like the most. They only sell them in that Kroger. Okay. So this is a real work trip. But also the only reason to give samples for spices is to sell the spices. Why else would you give samples of a specific spice unless you were going to sell the spice? Otherwise, it's just a waste of damn money, fool.

25:00People know how to do it. So is this yours? Why don't you make like the McB spice company at least? Or is this like some deal where you're going to get 10 % of their sales?

25:10Ben Mandelker: You're also the customer. Why aren't they coming to you? Yeah, none of this makes sense. So he's like, between Cole having a baby soon and Jesse getting married, this is our last chance to do something together before everything changes. nothing's going to change. Cole's going to have a baby. He's still going to go get wasted and ask for you and make out with whatever scraps you leave behind. Jesse's going to still do the same damn thing. Do you guys even work at this job? I need to know. Do you think they really work there? Cole will still be punching hills for years to come. Don't you worry.

25:42Marriage doesn't necessarily change people.

25:44Ben Mandelker: My mother does these. They just make them more annoyed. Now we go to Jesse and Allie's farmhouse, which I hate because for some reason it's like Robin's egg blue on every wall on the inside and Christy is like Christy's there she's like I'm frustrated Stephen should not have had the boys in position to leave you both you know I care a lot about how the boys treat you they know better than that so it's heartbreaking for me to see because it's like their dad it's his bad example and Nashville for them only leads to drama oh well It really feels like a slap in the face. Yeah, and I feel like I've changed so much.

26:24And all I ask of Cole is to change a couple of things. And he can't even do that to get ready for the baby. Christy's like, yeah, well, I think, you know, if he doesn't make those changes, you might need to make some decisions on your own and leave my son. Because I'm teaching my sons how to respect women. You'll start seeing evidence of that. I'm not really sure when, but I planted the seeds, kind of. Well, I got the seeds. I heard about it in a book. I don't really know how to plant seeds. I have to do my sons, actually. First, I'm starting to teach my sons how to plant seeds. We'll get to the women part later, girls.

26:57But I'll be working on it. I will be.

27:00Ben Mandelker: Listen, I don't use conditioner in my hair, but I will condition my sons. And you can do it, too. And Casey says, I just don't want to be married to Steve McBee, just his empire. Well, no, you don't. because being married to Steve McBee, that's a long, hard, oh my God, not right now. No, I wasn't going to say penis. I mean, it is. It is long, but it wasn't often hard. I forgot what we were talking about. Respect women. Girls, let me give you a sneak preview of what it's like to be married to a McBee. One moment you're married, another moment they're cheating on you, you stick in that marriage for 25 years, you have a whole bunch of sons, you just act like your husband, and then they go and they find a whole bunch of dumb, boring women that you have to sit there and pretend to talk to and they complain about it and you say, follow my example and they don't follow and then you're stuck having more long, boring conversations with them in a stupid house with blue walls.

27:54Hey, I heard that.

27:56Ben Mandelker: No, just theoretically. Just theoretically. These aren't just blue walls. These are Deborah blue. Now that's called Tiffany blue, honey. Now I'm a Debbie fan. I'm a Debbie fan. So then we go to Allie. Or Tiffany. I go to Debbie It's like the Timmy Tiffany blue It's less than K It's less than K and Jared It's Debbie It's the Debbie Gibson blue Out of the blue Yeah so then Jesse is like yeah Cole had it rough This morning too from Casey Yeah she gave me pretty strict instructions No following new girls on Instagram Which apparently I always do when I go on a trip God blow I've changed my whole life Changed so much.

28:43Now I can't even follow girls on Instagram. What the hell?

28:47Ben Mandelker: I like that the instructions for Cole were like the same. They felt like the same instructions for attending to Gizmo and Gremlins. Okay, if you want to have Gizmo, first rule is Gizmo has to call Casey before he goes to bed. There can be no girls around Gizmo and no drinking after midnight or before midnight. Yep. Yep. And except Cole never had the cute little part. You know, he's just always been the gremlin. And you're like, oh, my God, no one wants to take care of this thing overnight. Forget it. Just imagine Cole driving a little pink Corvette. I wouldn't be surprised if Cole had a personal rule not to ever get himself wet, though.

29:31Ben Mandelker: And based on how pale he is, I'm surprised he's ever been in the sunlight. Yeah. Well, I think that sounds pretty reasonable. Now, Cole said he was coming down here with his brothers and Jake. What's wrong with that? And Casey said that is literally the worst group of people to be in Nashville with. Isn't that hilarious? Hilarious. Yeah, well, she tends to categorize. Caterize. She lumps us in the same category. What do you say? How do you say it? Cactus. Cactus rise. Cuckoo rise. Cat rise. Cat rises us.

30:10Ben Mandelker: yeah um so is this when they're at the house now i'm confused i don't know where you are all the guys are just like well i guess we're gonna be good for the women because you know ali's gonna be mad if she sees any girls on reels so i mean these guys are so stupid they go they all go to like cheat on their wives and get shit face and then take instagrams of each other doing it yeah although last season was their dad who kept doing that he's like okay Hey, pose with these beautiful girls, guys. And then he'd take their picture and post it. Why is it so funny that he's like, Allie's going to be mad if she sees any girls on reels.

30:45Ben Mandelker: Allie said that if she sees anyone on Periscope, she's going to raise a ruckus. Allie was saying that if she hears a woman's voice on Clubhouse, she's going to get real angry. She said if I follow any more bands on MySpace, she's done with me. so Brayden comes and he has a little friend named Johnny who has a bleach to mullet so I like you know I like to see the mullet like around and being judged in different ways yeah it's a nice touch yeah and uh they tell him like no Instagram he's like that's right no Instagram no posting this won't even go on threads and Stephen's like he's like well since we have a meeting a real meeting with spices Galena is going to be there because you know what we cannot taste the spices without the CFO being there.

31:34Ben Mandelker: So we're going to stay somewhere. She's somewhere here in Nashville. And word on the street is that Masha is trying to come on down. So everyone looks like the Russian roulette is going to keep on coming. Galena is our spice girl. Okay. Psycho Spice is coming. We need to watch out because Masha's here too. So they sit around and talk and Jesse's like, wow, this is a nice little last hoorah before the wedding. Yeah. Well, so I sense you're a little late in asking Allie to sign those prenup papers. Did you have the prenup papers drawn up? Are you going to... Dude, stop trying to ruin his fucking relationship.

32:09And their whole view on this is really weird, too. Because they're like... He says with a 67 % or 72 % divorce rate, whatever it is, if you don't sign a prenup, you almost have to get your name off everything because there's a good chance you'll take it. So that's not true. If they each own 10 % of the company and he gets divorced, she would get the money from that company. She doesn't necessarily become an owner of the company.

32:33Ben Mandelker: Or she may own some sort of percent. I don't know. It doesn't matter. She's not taking over the farm. And why would she take over this stupid farm? So Stephen's like, She would get some of his portion of it, which she should. She's getting married to this man and having his children, presumably. So give her her money. I don't want to buy a jar of coriander and know that half of it belongs to Allie. That is not fair. By the way, did y 'all know that coriander is actually cilantro? I feel disgusted and tricked and betrayed by words. What cilantro? Exactly. Some talk show in the nineties. Okay. I don't care about that.

33:13Ben Mandelker: Beyonce sister. So Cole is like, yeah, if someone doesn't want to marry you for signing a prenup, it's kind of a big red flag. So let's just set the rule. Now, if you don't sign one, your name gets taken off the businesses. because that could be a risk. Oh, God forbid his name gets taken off the farm. That's$6 trillion in debt and is under FBI investigation. Exactly. What a terrible thing to not be associated with this farm. And if anybody is going to make anybody sign a prenup, Allie's going to make Jesse's broke ass sign a prenup. You guys are in debt. Your dad's going to jail. And she's got an actual career and a job.

33:51And she's going to school to even better her career. So fuck you guys. She should be making you sign a prenup. And I hope to God that's the twist that she's like, well, we need to have a talk. I need you to sign a prenup. Okay. Cause I'm not going to jail for you. I'm not going into debt for you. And you're not getting my money when you eventually cheat on me and leave me. Okay.

34:09Ben Mandelker: Yeah. And they've been like dating since they were like 11 years old. So I think she's in it for the real reasons. So then.

34:24Ben Mandelker: um so Jesse is like yeah no I don't know oh no so back up in uh so now a little bit later in the Nashville house here in McBee they're all hanging around and uh Steven is like has Allie called or texted yet wishing you a happy birthday birthday boy she is the most pessimistic person I've ever seen around a birthday I can't say that anymore I'm so angry no well a year from now things will look a lot different cole and maybe jesse they'll be changing diapers i'll be 31 in that wild in that wild um yes it's mind-blowing things will just be so radically different you'll be it's mind-blowing yeah it's mind-blowing things didn't work out with cala the girl you met on a on a dating show uh who you fight with and hate that's crazy yeah things are gonna look so guys he's gonna be 31 things are gonna look so different around here this is like yeah the last chance we'll be able to party while he's still 30 yeah they can make it really work out i do hope that he finds love soon though because he's only got a certain amount of time while his needs are still good i mean that is a huge man he's got a lot of muscle on there his needs are probably like when he walks his knees are probably like some side love it is a flower

35:50Ben Mandelker: yeah he's like you ever you know like in saw there's like jigsaw you know it's like if we ever got to see jigsaw in his youth i think it would be steven i think like it's like oh jigsaw had a good body at one point and that's steven right now well you see that episode and you and they they actually tessa said in some episode maybe last year so oh boss man that was a hardy he was a real hardy when he was younger you should have seen that body give me body give me body give me body give me bye body body body body body body body body body and they really do have the same eyes steven and the dad the same eyes and the same trying to ruin everybody's life so that they're all in the same boat they've got a lot in common so i'm just saying enjoy your 30 steven because you're about to start sledding down sledding down boy it's all downhill from here which is why the combine lost its tire so that way it's good to like spend most of your life out of shape and making no effort because then as you get older you can even make like a tiny bit of effort and you improve as you get older you see yeah absolutely Absolutely.

37:01Ben Mandelker: So now we go over to this baby shower and they're in some, I don't know, are they in like at the farm or they at someone's house? Every, I feel like every interior on this show looks like a community center. This definitely had community center vibes for sure. It's just like our study hall or something. Yeah. It's a water fountain. Yeah. There's like a bulletin board with like events coming up, but it's actually their house. Yeah, you're trying to have a baby shower and there's like pictures of missing cats. It's like they've got to end the baby shower because there's going to be like a school dance later.

37:44Oh my God, what a lovely card. Wait, is this an invitation to water aerobics? I'm sorry, I got that off the board. I got that off the board.

37:52Ben Mandelker: Sorry, we have to wrap up this baby shower. There's going to be a senior salsa dancing lesson coming in here soon.

38:02So we see Grandma Vicky McBee, Steve Sr.'s mom, and she just looks, she's like, oh my God, hi, Christy. Hi, Christy. I just miss you so much. I'm so sorry. I mean, this woman is just a bag of regret.

38:19Ben Mandelker: She is so upset. She's like, now I've got to deal with all these crazy Russians. My son keeps bringing him. And we have this lady who was, she was blonde. Isn't that good enough? and now she's successful. Static he is all hell yes, but successful. Why? Why? It's so great seeing Steve's mom. I missed her. I did. His family was like family to me. And what he did, it was not okay. It was not okay. It wasn't. Down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down. Over at Deacon's Steakhouse, Steve Sr. walks in to join all the boys. It's a surprise thing because I did not think we'd ever see him because i thought he wasn't going to be on the show because of the fbi or who knows what but he's here he's here on tv he made it and steven didn't tell any any of the boys so it's a surprise it's a surprise because you know i know he's not perfect but i love my dad and i love being around my dad and i love turning into my dad very very slowly inch by inch turning into my dad um the boys are all thrilled to see their dad who has been in hiding after running away from the show because we all know he's in trubs.

39:31They really treat their dad like he's a star.

39:33Ben Mandelker: I mean, it's nice. You know, it's nice when, like, the kids love their dad and everything, but they act like it's, like, they act like Garth Brooks just walked in and they're like, oh my God, it's dad. Come on, be chill, be chill, okay? It's dad, it's dad, okay. All right, who gets to sit next to dad? Oh my God, I can't believe dad's here. So he walks in and then, of course, they start talking about Galena because they know she's in Nashville. and of course, oh, how convenient. They invited Galena to lunch and oh my god, they left a chair next to Steve for Galena. Isn't that funny? Stephen's like, I'm a bet Galena comes and gets some bone marrow and Steve goes, 100%.

40:11She sure is. As Galena loves her marrow. You know, she's gonna get that.

40:19Ben Mandelker: Classic Galena with the bone marrow. Am I right everyone? That's so Galena. What do you want to bet? she takes this open chair that's right by you, Dad, that we left open for you. What do you want to bet she's going to take that one? There's no other chair. Chair.

40:35Ben Mandelker: Don't make stupid bets like that. Hey, Dad, what do you want to bet that Galena takes this open chair instead of sitting at a whole separate table? What do you think? I bet she sits right on top of the table and asks for bone marrow. So Galena comes in. She's like, hello, boys. Hello. hello boys hello steven senior hello oh what fancy meeting you here huh well there's duck but you know you know we we betting on you either getting tuna tartar bone marrow because that's galena coated ain't all right boys could you try not to ruin your stupid bet could you at least just let her make the decision first i mean what you're trying to guess if she's gonna get the bone marrow and you said we were guessing you're gonna get the bone marrow don't just you ruined it yeah us well i need lena right now through this fbi investigation but her biggest trigger you know she's doing a great job she lost us the um the uh hedge fund deal and then uh possibly aided my dad in uh insurance fraud so we really need her i mean this business is doing great because of galena so you know yes unfortunately her big trigger is masha so uh i'm trying to i took a marker and I scribbled out the mashed potatoes option on the menu, you know, just because she might read it as Masha with her accent.

41:57Ben Mandelker: The last thing we need to do is pay for any missing chickens in this restaurant or broken windows. Well, I guess I will have the baked potato and cut it up myself. Well, I hope, do they have chicken here? I sent them special bird ahead of time. Ginger bird. I hope you have the special today, Stephen. I brought it special for you, ginger chicken. You will love. Commercials. Here comes one right now.

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43:40Ben Mandelker: so meanwhile up at the dullest baby shower in the history of humans uh casey and her friends casey and the rain shine band basically they're playing some stupid game like guess what the price is for a bid 35 dollars 600 dollars 12 cents oh my god an eight pack of baby waps is$20. What kind of world are we living in? And Tessa's like, a night pack. I'll tell you something. I thought they was talking about one little bag of white peas. Oh my God. It was a night pack of white peas. That's worth it. This is why you always got to wrap up your dribble door. If you know what I'm saying, you'll be in the poor house soon enough.

44:27that part made me laugh so hard so now guys special announcement we're getting a person i've been requesting for weeks aunt darla uncle jimmy's wife is here here she is darla darla all i hear is darla darla darla it's great to have you here honey tell us what you've been up to

44:47Ben Mandelker: um yeah well uh jimmy had mentioned that they might go the boys might go to nashville christy That's what I heard from Jimmy. Well, God, I'm glad you're here. You really are the life of the party, Darla. Now, I get worried when the boys are with Steve because they never, you know, they're never just about spending time with the boys. It's always about Steve looking cool because of that, you know. And I don't think he wants him in solid relationships. He wants to have them around for partying and hanging out. What do you think of that, Darla? Darla's like, wets, baby wipes,$20. That's what I think.

45:20I think that's highfalutin highway robbery is what I think.

45:25Ben Mandelker: Hey, do you think there's any more of those entamined donuts in the back? Those were delicious. So then we go back to Deacon's. Sorry, Darla, you brought the show down. I believe you know, Darla. I mean, your Q rating went through the floor, dead. Yeah, I really thought shoes could be much more exciting than that. so back at deacons um uh i wonder if if you get fries there they're called deacon fries ah that's gonna be a deep cut for someone there'll be one person who always will get that joke i'm not gonna explain it star is drinking water i was drinking water did you actually get my joke my thing you could ever do on a podcast did you get my joke yeah i got it i just couldn't laugh I was drinking with my mishina.

46:12Ben Mandelker: Anyhoo. So Galena, she's like, oh, Jesse, it's your birthday. I know. I'm like, Jesse, I know. Yeah, they got a party bus. Oh, I know. That's so cool. I'm glad they got a party bus. By the way, you know what's funny about these idiots? They literally got a party bus. It's like literally, it's a school bus that they party on. I was like, yeah. So, Galena, do you feel, I'm not going to start any trouble here. I'm just going to try and start some trouble. So, Galena, do you feel any better after talking to my mom, Christy, who was also fucked over by Steve Sr., who you just happened to be sitting next to because you chose the chair that I predicted you would choose?

46:55Tell us how that meeting went.

47:00Ben Mandelker: Yeah. I'm grateful we found a connection. and by connection it was more like i said i'm so glad i got to see you and she said shut the fuck up and just be nicer to my son well some moves take longer to heal than other wounds but i'm happy you guys got to talk and everyone basically adulted up and said you know what we are not the wronged ones in this situation we are women and we have no right to complain about nothing so i'm glad you guys had that in common good times meanwhile back up at that little ladies event christy's still talking to darla he is such a hypocrite and darla's like he said he said that he does love you and will always love you and that's what matters the most no matter how much a guy treats you wrong if he loves you all that matters is that because we're women we just have to receive the love yeah so christy's like well i believe that he loves me as much as he's capable of loving a person but i want more than that for the boys.

48:00I want more than that for my boys. That's why I just, everything they do, I say, you do a good job. You do a good job. So then we go back and Steve Sr. flirts very heavily with Galena. He goes, So, did you like the duck? God, caliente a key.

48:25Ring, ring, ring, ring. Ding dong. Ding dong. Ding dong. Ding dong. Ding dong. Ding dong.

48:34Ben Mandelker: I'm sorry. Ding dong. Mash has been blowing up my phone. One second. One second. I'm getting a lot of texts. Hold on. I'm just going to leave. Okay. Okay. So, um. Ding dong dong. Hey, y 'all. The ketchup is ringing. Can someone take that to dad? Take that to dad. I actually found a way to communicate through the ketchup bottle. Guys, I want to do another bit. How much do you want to bet that the phone in front of my dad that is buzzing the most is my dad's phone. Who wants the best there? Okay. It's my dad's... I won't take that bet. The producer asked Galena, are you having a good time with Steve?

49:10And then Masha starts freaking out. She's like, I love it, stupid bitch.

49:19Ben Mandelker: So he leaves. Steve Sr. leaves and goes to the bathroom. And his microphone is off, but they capture audio. and he's like, what the fuck are you doing texting me like that when I'm in the middle of dinner with 15 other people? You said no pressure. This is the most pressure I've ever fucking seen. You need to disrespect my time with my sons. You're a woman and you're calling during man time. That's not right. Okay, I don't have time for this. Also, I'm about to take a dump. So how you like that? He's such an idiot. I mean, this is literally lines from the first season that he said to Galena. He gets these women, then he's like, okay, you want everything with me?

49:55You want to be part of my business raise my kids do everything you want you want to walk along the combine for the rest of our lives but i don't want no pressure because i'm still open i ain't never going to be bossed around by another woman in my life and then thinks that they go okay so that means that he never has to do anything that they say or treat them with any kind of respect this is fucking guy it's always the same thing over and over i'm like what do you think masha is going to do you know the producers told her that she you're in nashville with galena what do you think

50:24Ben Mandelker: she's gonna do of course so um so he does all this thing and he comes back to the table he's like we're all good but of course his phone is still going off and like ha ha ha ha ha so now they go to their party bus which as i said before is an actual bus with the roof sort of chopped off i mean it's fun what can i say i'm being a dick but it's fun and um they are riding around and Jake is asking Jake is like, so how you feel about the wedding, Jesse? And Jesse's all nervous. He's really nervous about this wedding that he doesn't have to do anything for. Yeah, and Stephen's like not much is changing.

51:03You're all pretty much married already. What's the difference? What's the difference going to be? Except that she's going to take over this entire company once she divorces your stupid ass unless you have her time to bring it up.

51:14Ben Mandelker: You can't say not much is changing when you just had a hissy fit. Everything's changing. This is the last time we get to do a thing like this. Everything is changing. And it's like, well, not much is changing. If you think about it. Yeah, the wedding can only be stressful to Steven, really. So Jesse's like, oh, God, I'm stressed out now because everybody around me is talking about prenups and divorce. So, yeah, it's kind of stressful. I wasn't even thinking about that part. Well, this is my first time single in Nashville. So whatever happens, happens. Great. Cole checks his phone and he's got 40 missed calls today.

51:51Well, you have literally done nothing wrong. Put your phone back in the pocket. Do you want me to get the law out of my pocket? Here you go. Let's scan the law. No mention of Spice. It's not against the law, okay? You are doing something lawful in searching for Spice.

52:07Ben Mandelker: You are doing nothing wrong. I mean, 44 missed calls. I mean, so you have a girlfriend who's pregnant. 44 missed calls. what could it possibly be oh maybe there's a complication maybe she went into labor maybe she died in in pregnancy who knows you couldn't have done it i'm like i answered the damn call who knows what's on the other end of that how is he not answering a call from his pregnant fucking girlfriend i mean what is wrong with these guys like i can't so then um now they're like night clubbing and we just see cole taking shot after shot after shot after shot and he's talking to some blonde girl at the bar and he's like, oh, I'm having a girl.

52:48She goes, are you excited? He goes, yeah, she's going to be my little buddy. She's going to be my everything. My everything. Lo, lo, lo.

52:56Ben Mandelker: Ding, ding, ding. And then he just starts going, they're all getting drunk. We see Cole getting drunker and drunker. And then all of a sudden he starts going, USA, USA, USA. You're not at the Olympics. You're at a bar. do people in other countries do that are there people who are like england england england england okay i'll have another fireball thank you thank you someone goes the most touristy bar in a city in their country and starts and starts shouting their country i don't think that happens you guys we know where we are like could you turn location on in this bar nope usa you Where the fuck did you people think you were two seconds ago?

53:42Ben Mandelker: Morons. Although, to be fair, if they filmed this in 2024, there was a chance the Olympics were happening. But I'm pretty sure this is like in October or something. So I think they made it seem like Cole was just like, look, look, USA. And everybody joined in. I think it's just one of those things you can do in a country bar to feel community. I think so. I think so. so um so then we go back to jesse and allie's city house it's the next day we're in jesse and allie's city house the distant sound of subways rumbling by taxi cabs honking there's a bum on the corner panhandling for change caroline drawing like you know comic book art or greeting card art or whatever the fuck if you listen carefully you can hear the sound of a puddle splashing on Carrie Bradshaw's dress.

54:31Ben Mandelker: So Casey is getting her makeup done for her maternity photo and Holly's doing her look and everything. And she's like, you know, for some reason I thought Cole was going to be here for the shoot today. So, you know, wonder where he is, huh? Don't want to rub salt into wounds. But anyway, you want to talk about that? He was supposed to originally. He's a nashville though what's it do with nashville i think it's a work thing something about spice i don't know i just don't know oh my gosh missing the maternity shoot's pretty bad that's pretty bad i don't like this i it's shitty i mean look i i don't really get the whole maternity shoot thing in the first place i'm not gonna lie i know it's a thing and now it's like it's not even i know there's no controversy it's not like a gender reveal it's just something that happens now i I personally just don't get it.

55:26Ben Mandelker: I don't know why you have to have these cheesy ass photos. Well, we don't have to get it. Yeah. Well, it's like, it's a pregnancy event. You're supposed to be there for pregnancy. But I know it's like you're, it's, you're doing it to together. And like, if you're going to say you're going to do it, then you do it. And if you were willing to draw a line before about a baby moon, draw a line around the maternity tests. I mean, it's just spices. And by the way, we never see them taste spices, which is hilarious. We see it in like a one second flashback. That was the thing I was looking forward to the most.

55:58Ben Mandelker: Yeah, they showed up for one second. We see Galena being like, oh, that tastes like honey. I'm like, after all this talk, we don't even get to see the spices. Aren't you trying to promote your spices? Come on, guys. So then we go back to the boys, and it's the next day, and dun, dun, dun. There's a woman's boot in the kitchen. And so Steven's like, wait, Jesse, are these your boots? He's like, no, I just, you just keep working your way up those stairs. We've got eight floors of one bedrooms in here. So good luck. We've got eight different McBees. So just go from next. It's like Goldilocks. I swear to God going from each room.

56:34Ben Mandelker: It's like, is it Cole? Hey, Cole's, are these yours? Are these your boots? And then it's like, does Cole have a lady in his room? Knock, knock, knock. He doesn't. He was a good boy. That's good news. I mean, mostly for Casey, but especially for the reputation of women in Nashville.

56:55Ben Mandelker: Honestly, especially for the reputation of Americans after all that USA chanting. Yeah. You know, after spending time getting wasted in a bar screaming USA, USA, you can't just like celebrate mediocrity, like crawling into bed with coal. Exactly. You know, the most patriotic thing you could do is not sleep with coal. That's a bipartisan thing. That brings MAGA and lefties together. Don't go near Cole. Yeah, everybody can be equally grossed out by Cole. That's across the aisle. Yeah. So finally, we go all the way up to the very tippy-tippy top, and it's Braden, the youngest McBee, who got it. And no word on if his mulleted friend was involved.

57:39We don't see him. But Braden got some. So good for him. Braden got some.

57:43Ben Mandelker: And he had a friend there, much like Imrule's friends. She got an arrow, but we never saw her face. Yeah. And so Steven comes over. Wait, no, I'm sorry. The dad comes over later. But they're talking about the wives. And Cole's like, oh, no, but I did forget to call Casey. So I'm in trouble because she's not happy with me. So we go back to the photo shoot and Cole FaceTimes. He's like, you look so good, babe. I'm sorry I forgot to call. I'm kind of sad. And Ali takes it. She's like, you should be sad. What, isn't she a snack? Look at her. Hottest fucking pregnant woman in the world. A semi-truck just called and tried to pull her into it.

58:24I mean, human trafficking has never looked so sexy. And you're missing everything. Loser.

58:30Ben Mandelker: Now, Ali, you have to really be careful with your words. Because if you say that Casey's a snack to Cole, he might literally try to eat her. So just really, let's use that. That's all you had to say in the first place. You should have just said Casey's a snack. He would have been there. Just say, doesn't she look like you could find her on a shelf at 7-Eleven? He'd be like, wait a second. Also, by the way, okay, the call before going to bed. I don't, how do you forget that? Like, honestly, even if you're wasted, I feel like you still can remember to, like, text your loved one. Well, especially after a whole day of ignoring the calls from your pregnant girlfriend.

59:07Ben Mandelker: Exactly. like I when I'm when I'm when I'm away I always text Dom before bed like goodnight I hope you had a great day whatever like you just you just do it it's like it should be part of your I feel like look my relationship is different than other people's relationships but I just feel like it's like part of the normal routine like it's just what you do you know yeah every night before I go to bed I'm like I don't think about anything else like you yeah Cole probably was texting a hillside I'd be like, sorry, I hit you. So, Allie, bullshit. So, whatever. She has a snack. So, now... Brayden's broken the bed, y 'all.

59:47The brothers sneak up to spy on Brayden and this girl. And they see that he's broken the bed. And they sneak downstairs laughing. And Steve Sr. comes out. And Jake's like, Oh, hi, balls, man. You're going to need a new bed. He's like, all right. Just be respectful when she comes out of here. Because one thing I'm teaching my boys is to respect women. alright

1:00:09Ben Mandelker: so she comes through they say hi she walks out and she has her boots back so then Steven's like hey oh sorry no son you say this instead hey look what I saw on Instagram it's Masha see where she is look at that and it's like Masha has taken a photo with like the big that big Batman building in the background of Nashville see now this is how you terrorize someone Janet was in such a snit about Zach on the Valley posting by text like oh I'm in Big Bear the way you really do it is you drive out to Big Bear and you take the picture Zach that's how you that's that's that follow in Masha's lead yeah well you're kidding me she's in Nashville as if he doesn't know come on you knew she was here no I swear I've not responded to a text or a call from her except for yesterday when I went into the bathroom and screamed at her and nobody heard me surely they're like yeah whatever nobody believes him and he's like well she did call me and said that no one can tell me where me or my friends can be so i guess she did it after all wait a minute something's going on outside is there something going on with my truck and we find out that the window is busted masha strikes uh the windows busted all the trucks have their windows busted in fun fact it was not masha it was actually my telepathic rage and it finally worked after 13 years watching bravo i was finally able to shoot my rage through a tv screen and break some windows i think well i mean it was either masha or galena trying to flame masha or trying to frame masha what do you think yeah um i think it was i think it was masha i think this one was this one felt like a masha crime you know galena is more of a galena goes after the woman masha is going to go after the boys i think well galena did go after cars though in the past because remember she smashed the car up through so i don't know but you're right she did go after well i don't know i don't know it's a lena got dinner galena galena was welcomed into the fold she got to sit with steve so she's feeling like high and mighty and masha is the one who's feeling on the outs at the moment.

1:02:21Ben Mandelker: So Masha is, I think this is a Masha vandalism. And also she's on the scene as we find out later. She literally pops up right there. It got like bloody knuckles. Means motive opportunity. Yeah, she comes in. She's like, hello boys, let's just playing some baseball outside. What a game. USA. USA. I will talk to dad. Goodbye. You stay down here. Good boys. Masha loves you. You son of a bitch. How do you leave me like this alone? By the way, how does she know where they even were? It's their Nashville house. Everybody knows where the Nashville house is. Oh, that's their Nashville house? Yeah. I thought it was an Airbnb.

1:03:06No, they have a Nashville house. They're so broke, man. They just can't pay their debts. So they got a big party house in Nashville.

1:03:13Ben Mandelker: I know she's here. I know she's here. He goes, she came for a spouse meeting. You need to be tolerant. She came for a spice meeting. Okay? Fennel, ever hear of it? It comes in seed form. She was there for that. So she's like, okay, well. And she goes, you flew all the way here. You're crazy. It was spice. She goes, okay. You son of a bitch. I killed you in your sleep. You'll never live again. You'll not have needs left. Goodbye, boys. Good to see you. See you, boys. Happy birthday, Jess. Goodbye. Bye. She comes out all cheery. They just have this big argument upstairs. Hi. Well, I gotta get going.

1:03:57Ben Mandelker: I told Mashah to meet her behind a dumpster. We'd fuck. Yeah, so he immediately skedaddles. She was like, you can get the fuck outside right now. It's like, okay, boy, see you later. So they leave. They get back to the farm. It's like 6 a.m. the next day. I guess they did an overnight drive, a long drive. They get in. Everyone's, of course, awake and hanging out. And I'm like, oh, well, that was sort of a fun episode. Little did I realize there's still 10 minutes left of just sitting around this farmhouse. Literally, the rest of the episode is them sitting around this farmhouse. Yeah. So Cole and Jesse come in and Casey and Allie are there.

1:04:31And Cole's like, never doing that again. Never invite me there again. Are you all going to say hi to me or what? He's like, oh, you're here. I was just talking to Allie. Well, you didn't miss me? He's like, no, I didn't miss you. He's like, how come? I just didn't. He goes, wow. Even the baby just kicked me. That's not the only one in this family wants to kick you in the head. Cole.

1:04:54Ben Mandelker: The baby just thought you were a hillside. So then we go to our coffee shop. And Stephen and Christy walk in. They're sitting there. They're going to have mother or daughter. Mother son talk. I lied. I forgot. There was also a coffee shop in the final 10 minutes. So Stephen is like, So are we good with Casey and Allie now? And Christy's like, yeah well as long as your nashville days are over you're never allowed to go to nashville ever again the rest of your life and he's like i mean we really did have a meeting one of those days i mean we really did have to we had to try spices and you know spices and seasonings uh that's an important meeting spices and seasonings everyone knows when i got my mba you have to learn about spices and seasonings mother you're the most pessimistic person i've ever met about spices and seasonings i didn't mean it to morph into a guy's trip but it conveniently worked that way It was, you know, before the wedding, before Jesse's birthday weekend.

1:05:46Yeah, well, I view it differently because I view it as a horrible timing with the wedding, a shower, a photo shoot. I mean, you might be single now, but Cole and Jesse are very much not. And I don't agree with the position you put everyone in. I need you to be a better example for your brothers.

1:06:01Ben Mandelker: Now, Mother, we did not need to be there for the baby shower. No, I was talking about baby shower saying that was Cole's scheduled once every two weeks shower. Okay, we bought him new soap.

1:06:12God forbid I be social. She goes, that's not what I said. Now, you literally just told me I have no social life without my brothers. You know what? Like, I have to stay in my house as a prison sentence because Jesse's getting married and Cole's having a baby. But because I'm single, I have to now be a hermit. Well, that was the most tame Nashville trip, and I'd do nothing wrong. No, you just have to, like, go make friends or get some life outside of your brothers and stop dragging everybody into your bullshit just like your father. Your mother's right, sir.

1:06:43Ben Mandelker: listen, you snowflake, okay? She's just saying that he's got a wedding coming up, he's got a baby on the way, and now is not the time for you guys to be gallivanting all around Nashville, especially on the heels of you having a hissy fit about harvest season and you can't go on a baby moon. So shut the fuck up. And also, you weren't just like taking, yeah, go jerk off on a what? Corner. Jerk off on a corner. Also, you didn't just take them like out of love in your heart. you made them go as your as their boss that's different too you know a little asshole so uh he gets really mad and his eyes get really mean just like his dad's when he gets mad he has mean eyes and um christy's like well you're just frustrated over your situation with kella and you're taking that out on me and he's like well at least she's around all her friends and her family and here i am living in isolation five miles from the nearest neighbor i mean god forbid i go to nashville i'm a horrible person i mean don't we just i guess we won't go there anymore then don't worry i'm saying okay you i'm gonna take this mic off because you are gonna respect me i want to have you talk to me like that do you understand me i'm gonna take my 19 000 calorie milkshake that i'm drinking in whatever kind of shop door there's no that thing i was like that's your liberty of lattes with me it's like how is this woman so thin it looked like an arm it looked like a full arm filled with just cream.

1:08:08Ben Mandelker: She looked like she was looked delicious. She also looked like she was like doing an off-camera bet with someone. She's like, like, Chrissy, I bet you can't even go to Darla's coffee shop and drink a full size double cream latte. She's like, I bet I can't. I will do it. And she orders it and she's like staring at it the whole time and like total fear like you can do it, Chrissy. You can do it. So he's like, oh God, she goes, I'm not going to let you treat me like this and he says you're the one talking that me mother she goes well maybe that needed to happen now excuse me you know what i'm gonna finish this in the car maizey it was good to see

1:08:55Ben Mandelker: he's all mad he's like i can't believe mother said i can't go to nashville anymore do you know by the way this bullshit like do you know how hard it is i live five miles from the nearest neighbor whose fault is that whose fault is that you chose well he's resentful he's resentful because he's left to run the company and he's like stuck as a prisoner for this company that's failing and he's the only educated one and he has to share everything with his brothers who really don't have any brains and he's like the brains behind the operation the only trouble is your operation is failing because of you you like you're a big part of that so like you can't really resent anybody for having to live there when you're failing like if you're rich and you start making the money then you can leave but you can't like pull a check for like going and living a rock star life in dallas or whatever you want like make up your mind also five miles in in the country is like five minutes by the way five miles in los angeles is an hour five miles in gatlin wherever they are gallatin that's gonna be five minutes so i really don't want to hear it okay well he basically said in the first episode uh of season one he was talking about how like he's stuck here to help the family business and there's literally nobody to date because everybody's married or they've known each other since middle school like his brothers and their girlfriends you know so there's no one to date there's no one on tinder i think you go on tinder and it's like 80 miles away and so he has to go like to dallas to meet anybody and there's nobody close and that's why he stays with cala because that's like literally all he has yeah Yeah.

1:10:29Yeah. So cry for him, Ben. Feel for him.

1:10:31Ben Mandelker: I feel so bad for him. Suffering. I feel so bad for him. It's hard. So now we go to Jesse and Allie's farmhouse because they're still all sitting there. And Jesse is like, we retired Nashville. And Allie's like, good. But you're really done for a while? And he's like, forever. And Cole goes, ever. In case he goes, why? I mean, I'd go back just to, you know, but why? No, no, you won't. But I'm wondering why you're saying that you won't go back. And so because I thought you guys would like to hear me say that I wouldn't go back. I thought, see, I mean, I will go back. But I thought what would be nice would be if I said I wouldn't go back.

1:11:12Ben Mandelker: Because that way it would be a lie. But it would make you smile. And ladies need to smile. I'm just trying to make you less mad at me. She's like, well, you might as well be honest and not say never. Because we know six months you're going to go. He's like, well, for one, I don't have any upcoming Nashville trips. He goes, well, but, you know, like how you said at the lake, you're never drinking again. And then you was drinking. He's like, well, but between the time of the lake to Nashville, I didn't drink. Yeah, but that was two weeks. Yeah. Sometimes I feel like nothing I ever say is right. I'm like, because it isn't right.

1:11:49Ben Mandelker: And you should just stop speaking. Yeah, that's the one thing you're correct about. nothing you ever say is right it's like hey y 'all hear that brayden found a girlfriend he's in love oh yeah was that the only girl around yeah you lying i mean mac and johnny had girls why is this episode still going why is this they had girls they were supposed to have girls and it's like i can't tell my friends what to do and she's like you can just answer he's like well i'm tired of fighting and being accused of things that i did she's like well i'm tired of having to set boundaries to get ignored. You know, I just did a baby shoot by myself in the corn.

1:12:24Ben Mandelker: Hey, you guys ever wonder what Stephen's up to? Maybe he's sitting in a coffee shop somewhere feeling sad because mom just sort of told him off by walking out a little bit. And they're like, yeah, let's go over there. So there's Stephen sitting alone next to his giant Burj Dubai of coffee. And he's like, bling, bling, Kala saying, hey, it's like, dun, dun, dun, Kala's coming back. And like, this is supposed to be like a big shocking thing, but it's not shocking when we saw her packing up her stupid vase full of flowers last episode. Like, you got to make us miss them before you bring them back.

1:13:00Yeah. No one is surprised. Okay. No one is surprised. So that was it. The big McBee dynasty, guys. Hope it all works out.

1:13:09Ben Mandelker: God. Maybe this time it'll work out for Steven and Kala. Time will tell. He's just giving another shot, you crazy kids. Next week, it looks like Cole is getting down on one knee and giving Casey some sort of popsicle ring or whatever. I guess he's going to pop the question. Let's see if he pops a prenup as well because he was pretty judgy about that prenup today. So let's see if he tries to drop that. Casey will beat his ass. Let's see. Yeah. Thanks, everyone, for being here. Love talking to you, Ronnie. and we'll be back with the valley on the next episode bye everybody you deserve a bonus compliment why not bye bye

1:14:23We never miss her call.

1:14:24Ben Mandelker: It's Diane Call. Erin McNicholas. She don't miss no trick-a-less. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go, we all go for Hugo. Jamie. She has no less name-y. She's our kind of mess. It's Jennifer Messer. Sips some scotch with Jessica Trotch. She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock. Kristen the Piston Anderson Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey B Que sera sera Whatever will be will Lauren Sills be Brigging the funk It's Leslie Plunkett She gets an A from us It's Lindsay D Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino Fresh as a daisy It's Maisie McHenry We love her on the rocks It's Melissa Cox Megan Berg You can't have a burger without the Berg This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian I love a ya Olivia Williamson Tastier than Flandersen, it's Rachel Manderson.

1:15:18Ben Mandelker: She sure is swell, it's Raquel. Yes we canna, it's Sadana. Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge. Darn Skippy, it's Tippi. And our super premium sponsors. She's VVIP, it's Amanda V. Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin. Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O 'Neill. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily Sides. Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland. Let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs. It's our queen, it's Queen Laifa. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall.

1:16:00Ben Mandelker: Hail the cork master, the master of the cork, Jennifer Corcoran. We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo. We love him madly, it's Kyle Podshadley. In the study, with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock. G, it's Lisa H. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron. She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy. Always killing it, it's Lola Alkalani. The incredible edible Matthews sisters. She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose. There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud. Neat, it's Ronit Feldman. She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke. We cannot tell a lie, it's Sarah Talafson.

1:16:41Ben Mandelker: Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony. Please don't stop at Soli and Pop. Let's take off with Tam LaPlane. It's always a good time when you're wasting time with Bravo. She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar. We love you guys. This episode is sponsored by Nature Raised Farms. There are so many complicated things on Bravo. Like opening the front door on Summer House. Or figuring out how to wear a Linfinity dress. Or understanding Tom Schwartz's purpose on the Valley. In a world full of confusing choices, thank goodness for nature-raised farms. They believe that food shouldn't be complicated. Especially chicken.

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