#2969 RHOM S7E10: Spain’t Misbhavin’

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1:48Ben Mandelker: Happens when there's so much that crappens Hello and welcome to Watch Watch Crappens A podcast about all that crap on Bravo That we just love to talk about I'm Ben, Ben Mandelker specifically And joining me today Is a wonderful person who I would always bring on my private plane It's Ronnie Karam Hi Ronnie How are you? So sweet, Shoujo Shoujo Shoujo Shouma Shouma Sorry, Shouma Shoma to you, Ben. You know what Shoma stands for? Stupid Housewives of Miami airplanes. That's funny. I thought it was like a new Shalom. Like, Shalom, Shalom, Shoma. Shoma the money. So we are here to talk about the first episode of the big cast trip to Sevilla on Real Housewives of Miami.

2:44Ben Mandelker: A hilarious episode. going forward. Miami is going to be airing on a new night, Thursdays. And so our recap of it is going to go up on Mondays. So keep an ear out for it then. And there's a brand new Miami actually going to air tonight. So that's going to be, we've got back to back Miami's happening. Very excited for that. Be sure to join us on Patreon, patreon.com slash watchful crappens. We have weekly bonus episodes. We also have crappens on demand where you can watch us stream these recaps on El Intraneto. So join us there. We would love to have you there. Or don't. Do whatever you feel like.

3:22We'd love to see you there. We would love to see you. Come on by. So this episode of Miami takes a place in Sevilla, or as they call it in Sevilla, Seville. Which I found interesting. I don't know why that kept bothering me the whole time. But every time someone in Sevilla said, hello, welcome to Seville. like well that's interesting because everybody else on the show is telling me i have to pronounce it sevilla is it because they are just catering to americans and they're like we know you're

3:52Ben Mandelker: gonna fuck it up so well i was excited just to go to the city where um cadillacs were born cadillacs no wow oh i believe do it took me a minute sorry no cadillacs are from michigan it's cruella's sister city okay it's where the first barber was ever invented was in seville yes um but uh actually seville looked beautiful and i really want to go now i want to go to spain i've never been to spain i am ready for my spanish adventure so let me tell you that place looked gorgeous and the only thing that i think it really lacked um was air conditioning because i did not see any air conditioning slots.

4:39And that's the first thing I look for when I look at vacation trips. I'm like, where is the air conditioning vent? Could I travel to this country?

4:46Ben Mandelker: I have to say Radisson Collection, because they were like, oh, we're staying at Radisson Collection. Look at the Radisson Collection, Radisson Collection logo. I have to say, we've seen a lot of presidential suites on Bravo over the years. This was not a very impressive presidential suite. This was basically like a Hyatt, this is like a Hyatt house. Like, this is like, there was like a little foyer and a bedroom I was like, what is happening? I understand in Spain or in Europe in general, hotel rooms are always smaller. But I mean, what presidents are you putting in those suites right now? Come on.

5:16I don't think they respect the presidency in Savelle. Okay. And they're like, no, we don't like presidents here. It's like the real suite is the mayor suite. You know, that's like a big ornate one.

5:28Ben Mandelker: I was like, these were weak ass presidential suites. Also, I have to say this. I had such a strange react. I had lots of really strange takeaways from this episode. we've also seen over the years many many many private planes on bravo all the time and every time i see them on a private plane i'm like yeah sure looks fun whatever you see them i always feel like it looks a little cramped in fact but you know i know private flying private it's gotta be better this was actually the first time they flew private and i was like i would like to fly private someday like because i maybe because it was just four of them well there's a hot take plane no but like this is the first time i really felt jealous i'd really like to fly private that is crazy i'm praising myself for the comments i have a hot take flying private looks amazing um but this one kind of looked like the best one i've ever seen it was just four people i think it was because they were sitting at a table and they had a giant spread of like cheese and crackers and wine and i was like this looks so fun because it It wasn't normally when they fly private, they're on these little seats and it's small.

6:34Ben Mandelker: And they're always like sitting there. So stand sitting on the seats over like the edge of them talking to each other. And I'm always like, that looks like a little annoying. But this one, they were just sitting at a table eating snacks. And I thought. And they had beds when they went to lie down in the bed. I like that, too. But I look at private planes. I'm like you. I mean, I normally think of them as like John Denver died, you know, or like, you know, Lou Diamond Phillips died on that in that movie La Bamba. Or like JFK Jr. I think about people that we've lost in private planes. So that scares me.

7:08But then I realize I'm an addictive person who rides a Vespa. And I'm like, get over it. You can ride this. But also looking at this one, I did think it looks nice. But it also just looked like the old man balls you have to guzzle to get that. And I was like, this is not as nice. I didn't like it. And the whole thing's like, show my, show my, show my bangs. I was like, all I can see is you guzzling old mad balls. That's all I can see. I'm sorry. I don't want to be on this plane. It makes me uncomfortable. You know, like an earned plane. I'll go on an earned plane. But I feel like Katie from Vanderpump Rules when she didn't want to go on Lala's plane because like she blew some guy to get on that plane.

7:44I feel like I'm like, I'm not getting on that plane. But then I would get on the plane and I'd be like, I love this plane.

7:51Ben Mandelker: You could smell Masood's pubes. but i have to say i think despite that i think you know what it was i mean they were being so stupid putting on like like stupid lighting and dancing having a dance party but then there's part of me that thought that's wild that you can do this on a plane like i know on private planes the rules are different in terms of like being like in seatbelts and moving around and all that stuff but i'm like that's wild but that being said like what happens with turbulence because i know i can just be i will be sitting in my seat on a regular plane with my seatbelt strapped and And like that random turbulence that hits out of nowhere.

8:24Ben Mandelker: Oh shit. Like if you were doing that and you were not in a seatbelt and you also had like a giant thing of like grapes and charcuterie in front of you, that's just getting everywhere. So. Yeah. Yeah. I was wondering how you were feeling watching that because you're very, very into safety. Like I've driven you a couple of times. And when I'm pulling out of the, I'm one of those people who like pulls out of the driveway and starts putting on my seatbelt, you know, kind of gets ready as I move along. Like if I was a woman, I'd be putting on the lipstick because I was driving, you know, I'm like that.

8:52and you're very much like, why isn't your seatbelt on? Why isn't it on right now? We are pulling out. I'm like, I'm putting it on, girl. Give me a give a boy a break. I know this is what before driving is about.

9:04Ben Mandelker: I don't like your seatbelt policies. I don't like how slow it takes you to put on your seatbelt when you're pulling out of wherever we're pulling out. That seatbelt should be on and it should be ready to go. And you don't like that I don't put it on in the back seat. I hate that. I know it makes you crazy, but I don't feel like that's the law. And you know what? I'm old enough to remember when they passed the seatbelt laws and when people went crazy. And they were like, how dare you? And also, I'm from Texas, you know, but they're like, how dare you tell me what I can do in my own car? You can't tell me to put on no seatbelt.

9:40Ben Mandelker: There weren't even seatbelts in the backseat, I don't think, back then. I don't think that was a thing. My grandma Sylvia hated putting on a seatbelt because, you know, when she was, you know, she came up with the car like back then there weren't seat belts i'm not even joking like she i mean she she was born in like 1917 okay so she was like she she was so when the idea of putting on seatbelt was like well we didn't ever have to do this before but i'm like we like but like i am like buckle up it's the law that's what i raised was raised with i'm like i want that seatbelt and I want it on. I want it all over me.

10:17Ben Mandelker: Get that belt all over my body. That belt all over me. Yeah. Yes. Belt me up. Give me that belt. Give me some laws. Well, you know, remember. Yeah. Well, this episode seatbelts, the real house was the Miami seat belt. Buckle your seatbelts. It's time to recap. Yeah. We're packing. Everybody's packing to go. And Alexi is packing with Frankie. It's like, you know, my favorite part of going to places where it's a little colder than Miami. I like to go in these boots and I like to say, I'm wearing these boots. and you didn't compliment them in front of Frankie. How could you? How could you do that to Frankie?

10:50Ben Mandelker: And he looks at the boots and he goes, horrible, horrible. Well, Joel didn't like them either. He's like, you see? Thank you. So then we see Gertie packing and then Lisa's packing shoes and she's like, these girls are going to be jealous. Just wait until they see my looks. I win. I win. I win. And we see what she's packing and it's just like a pinky sized red dress. Well, I think you have to get to Seville in order for you to win the competition first. So we'll circle back to that. So the airport women arrive at the airport. The commercial women arrive at the airport. And Alexi is like, I live in Spain from 17 to 23 in Madrid.

11:34That's more of a metropolitan city like New York. And Seville is more like an elder city. So it's like the Marisol of cities, you know. And I know Americans sometimes called Sevilla, Seville, but I just can't with that. Like, it's Sevilla. Por favor.

11:50Ben Mandelker: Adriana just pops up and says, you know what I call Sevilla? Dry bony knees city. Dry bony knees. Bony knees. Dry, dry, dry knees. Hey, Marisol, could you take us to the Dry Knees Museum?

12:09Ben Mandelker: So, Lisa is running late. She's 45 minutes late. Actually, not 45 minutes late. It's 45 minutes to boarding time and they're like, where is she? It's an international flight. You can't just like pop up at the last second, right? And Grady's like, I mean, she knows we got to be there two hours at the minimum. I mean, look at this. So we get another Lisa running late montage, which they love to bust out that montage multiple times a season. And this has been happening for a few seasons because how annoyed has production been? You know, we were talking when we were on Jeff Lewis last week. He told us that Lisa, I guess what Lisa's call time was late and even if Lisa's call time is late, you know production.

12:49Ben Mandelker: Production has had it with her and I mean, you can tell production has had it with her this episode. They are roasting her the entire time. Yeah. So there's going to be a point of contention, guys. Okay. And Alexi's like, what does she think? They're going to stop the plane for her? Come on. She probably does. And then it's two hours later and we're in Stephanie's private plane. and Lars and Adriana are boarding and Stephanie finally gets there. She's late and she's like, um, hello. Shake my hand, please driver. That's right, Sergey. Okay, first the Birkin. This is a Birkin that carries all of the other Birkins.

13:26It's$70 ,000. Have you ever noticed the way she laughs? She does that. She does a silent laugh, but we have a friend who makes this exact same face. Her name rhymes with Mady Mazorla and she laughs like this.

13:43it looks just like her. It looks just like her. It cracks me up. That's the most likable thing about Stephanie is that little laugh.

13:52Ben Mandelker: Crap is on demand exclusive. The Stephanie's show. I mean, what's her last name? Showed I laugh. You're so right. She laughs exactly like maybe Buzorla. So yeah, she gets up. She has her thing and then she gets on board and they're like, no, no, no. Take off your shoes before you step on the cashmere. Because there's like a cashmere rug, I guess, which, listen, we know you're rich. We know you've got a private plane and all that stuff. Why do you have a cashmere carpet or rug? That ain't her. That's her husband's company plane. It's got Shoma all over it. Because it's fancy. You take clients around on there.

14:33Ben Mandelker: But that's not rug material, okay? Be luxurious within reason. Be logically luxurious. don't be stupid luxurious yeah and she's like you know what they say girls departure time is whenever stephanie shows up yeah let's get some drinks on let's get some drinks on so they're going and making drinks i think the reason why i really liked this private plane i'm just gonna talk about this the entire episode i think the reason why i liked this private plane is because they were acting in this private plane they were if they were just like in someone's kitchen and I never really saw a private plane space feel like a kitchen.

15:10Ben Mandelker: They were making cocktails. And obviously we know you can make cocktails on a plane because that's what flight attendants do all the time. But there was something about them grabbing the booze and pouring drinks and dancing and lights. I don't know. I was like, I was like, I think I'm on a private plane now. I think I want this experience in my life. Can we make that a Patreon goal? You're a person who like has told yourself that you love rules and you've defined yourself, you've defined your life by rules and you're seeing what it's like to live without rules and you're getting turned on. You're getting a no rule boner.

15:43You're going to become, you're going to become a fucking renegade, like anarchist. Yeah.

15:49Ben Mandelker: After this episode. I will, I will totally be an anarchist, which is ironic because during the Spanish Civil War, anarchists were part of the mix. So, in case you want, I've been playing a board game about the Spanish Civil War lately a lot. And you can play as anarchists. And I'm learning things about what went on in there in the 30s. So fun times, everyone. So Stephanie is like, I've never been this super social, full of friends type of girl. And it's just been like crazy. Look at all these lights flashing. We're partying. But I'm trying to do new things. And I mean, how bad can it be? Right, guys?

16:27Ben Mandelker: I am fun. I am Stephanie Shoja. I am paying for my friendships right now, which I will deny doing later. When she said, I've never been this super social, full of friends type of girl, I was like, oh, you don't say. I can't tell at all. Can't tell at all. You seem like the person that people naturally gravitate to. Like, for instance, your sisters. Yeah. You just seem like you have so much fun with women. And she's like, guys, show my bags. I've got show my bags here. Everybody gets one. They've got LED masks and bus bench posters with my face on them. just if you want to put them anywhere in your house that would be okay um and what else does she give them she gets pajamas but not pajamas she gives pajamas not pajamas and larsa larsa is like annoyed for some reason she's like i mean who does stephanie like think she is like oprah like you got a gift like you get a gift like everybody's getting a gift like xyz and this and that like I'm like, Larsa, when did you not stop liking that?

17:33Ben Mandelker: I feel like that's Larsa's MO in life is to receive gifts. Yeah. So Adriana's like, I could get used to this life. It's a tough life, but someone's got to live it. I'm grateful you chose me to live it. Thank you for choosing me. Oh, it is Kiki who chose you to live this life. Not me. Not me. Don't forget. Hilarious callback to Adriana being mean to me. I was concerned, honestly. Are you guys good? Are you guys fighting or anything? Like, what's going on? You guys want to fight right now? No, no fighting. It's like, because I feel like you feel like a certain way. Is that true? Do you want to put on my pajamas first before we discuss this?

18:09Ben Mandelker: No, maybe there's like a little hiccup, but I thought she had chosen to come without me. Well, Adriana, if I would have a private plane, I would invite you on private plane and give you got pajamas. But I do not have private plane. Not my plane. Not my rules. and not my place to make an invitation. So the producer asks her, Julia, like, did the thought cross your mind to not take the private plane to be with Adriana on a commercial flight? And Julia's like, the answer is goat. No, wait, I'm sorry. Wrong question. The answer is no. And I think the answer should be no. I'm sorry. If someone invites me, like, this is not middle school.

18:51Ben Mandelker: People don't have to hold hands on different flights. I think it was very nice of Stephanie to invite Julia and I don't think that there was any obligation to like maybe if it was like a husband and a wife situation maybe if you had like a Acadian Tom Situation maybe there'd be a consideration but honestly if if if Dom got if Dom if you got invited onto a private plane and I was on commercial I would be like go have fun have a blast that is a lie here I would sit there in the plane and be like fuck them fuck them all but it doesn't matter if I'm mad you guys should still do it I should never stay back because of me let me be mad let me be Katie Maloney on the plane because ultimately it's not right for you to give up a private plane experience for my crusty angry ass oh Ben I would totally give it up for you don't worry whatever happens you're the private plane is you silence that show well I wish I could have brought everyone but it was really hard I couldn't invite Gertie and speaking of Lisa do you even think she made it on the plane you guys she's late all the time I'm such part of this group look at me with girlfriends I don't know like but like I'm just gonna be cordial with her like cause Lisa hasn't even unfollowed my ex-boyfriend like Marcus Jordan-like.

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22:14Ben Mandelker: Set in 1980s Los Angeles, the series follows a group of glamorous, deeply entangled high school seniors drawn into a life of wealth, beauty, parties, and excess. At its center is Brett, whose reality begins to unravel when the arrival of a new student coincides with a series of mysterious murders. FX's The Shards, now streaming on Hulu. And Stephanie's like, okay, guys, it's time for us to put on pajamas. Are you guys ready to put on your Shoma group pajamas? Mine are the white ones, you guys have the black ones. Okay, we're going to show the difference here, because I own the plane, okay? So I've got different pajamas than you guys.

22:50Ben Mandelker: You want to put on your pajamas? Anyone? But if Lisa doesn't see all the things I'm going through publicly, like with someone like bashing me like you're not like my fucking friend like i feel like i love larsa elevating her situation with marcus to like national scandal no one is paying attention no one cared we saw the picture of him snorting coke in france and we all laughed like stupid marcus and we all never heard from him again right no one is keeping tabs on larsa's issues no one is tracking down larsa's comments on marcus's instagram i'm gonna tell you that right now. And if there's footage of us talking about it on crappy hour, then fine.

23:26Ben Mandelker: I don't care. It's two of us talking about it. But the world is not talking about it. Yeah, it's not the world. We're just two queens, you know. So Stephanie is like, I wonder if the girls on commercial got pajamas also, because I gave you guys pajamas, because I'm a girlfriend. I'm a real girlfriend. Do you think the other girls are doing private plane things? Getting food, drinks, dancing, getting show my bags. Do you think they're doing that on the private plane? What? Lose Oh, my God. She's this girl screams just got some old man's money. Like she's just screams is sad. It makes me sad. Like you should just be more enjoy.

24:03You should just like enjoy this more without needing to rub it in everybody's face. You know, you just need to be one of those people. It's like you want to look at someone with new money and be like their new money. They act like a Rockefeller. So classy.

24:19Ben Mandelker: I, you know, my favorite version of new money is when people act like they're old money, but they've been new money all this time. Like Yolanda Foster, you know, oh, yes, you want to come on to my flight, please come on to my flight. But I don't know. I like that. I can't describe it, though. That's my favorite version of new money is fake old money. But I I'm really enjoying Stephanie being just an obnoxious twit. I don't know why. It just tickles me to no end. I'm laughing. I mean, look, I think that Stephanie is a complete asshole. I really do. I think she's a horrible human being. I think she's a terrible person.

24:56She's an awful, awful, awful girl. But I'm really enjoying her. I have to say, I was laughing very, it's fun to laugh at her. It's kind of like a Heather Dubrow thing. Like, I had to get through a lot of years of just despising Heather Dubrow. And now I don't despise Heather Dubrow anymore. Like, I can see the humor in her. You know what I mean? Yeah. I don't ever want to meet her or talk to her or be in the same room with her. or even like the same bus as her or whatever, which would never happen.

25:22Ben Mandelker: Oh, don't worry about that. Heather Dubrow, flap hand, flap hand. Yeah, I just think that Stephanie, I think Stephanie is so funny because she just cracks me up. Obnoxious, terrible person, but cracks me up. So Julia is, by the way, we then see footage of the women in flying business class. And I do say, it's funny, Business class is so nice. And they're like at a nice business class. They've got pods. This is like enviable flying. It's like first class. This is enviable flying. But after seeing the four women on their own plane, then when you see them all in first class, it looks like they are on like a city bus.

26:03Ben Mandelker: I was like, ugh, disgusting. Look how crowded it is. Honestly, I'd take the pod. I would take the pod. I mean, to me, that's like the ultimate glamour. You're in your own private bed. It can be a bed or a chair. You don't have to look at anybody. You can watch whatever you want on TV. You get your own personal three-meal service. I mean, that's for me. Listening to Stephanie brag about her shit, you could not pay me to be on that. Although I would take the red light mask. Did you notice that red light mask was one that I suggested on Amazon Live? I was like, wow, that girl must have watched our Amazon Live because she got my favorite red light mask.

26:39Ben Mandelker: Yes. this week I'm hoping to add Shoma group pajamas onto our broadcast. Fingers crossed. Fingers crossed. So Julia's like, do you think the girlfriends are bitching about us having caviar and salsa? Or are they saying we're so happy for them? And Stephanie is like, absolutely, none of them are saying we're so happy for them. Silent laughs. I feel like I've got to make a noise to do this, Stephanie. Like for the people who are just listening with audio. So I feel like we have to make some sort of noise to indicate it's Stephanie's silent laugh. It's just so funny to me that she doesn't ever make any noise.

27:15There's no breathing. There's no panting. There's nothing. She just goes.

27:22So then we cut to Marisol and she's getting glanced. They're like doing her lips and her like, you know, widow outfit. She's like, oh, my God, flying commercial. You have to go through the line. You have to see TSA. You have to take things out of your bag. They stick their finger up your buns. They do a mouth swap. You know, they turn you upside down by your ankles and shake you. I feel like a prisoner. What is this, a tuna sandwich? I feel like a prisoner. Horrible.

27:54Ben Mandelker: So then we cut back to Steph, and she has a big announcement. She goes, I love tea sandwiches. Like Marisol, tea sandwiches were so good. This is the first time we've ever heard anyone declare love for a tea sandwich. I feel like tea sandwiches are the most basic, simple sandwiches of all time. I mean, they're nice. I mean, cream cheese and cucumber. Fine. Lovely. But who says that they love tea sandwiches? I'm sorry. That is crazy. When there's so many other better sandwiches out there in the world, tea sandwiches are just like the, they're just the, they're just, I'm trying to even, I can't even come up with a metaphor.

28:31Ben Mandelker: I can't even come up with an analogy. I was going to try to say that there's something of sandwiches. I can't even come up with what they are. What are they of the sandwiches? They are. They're like the mayo. Well, no, not even mayo because mayo is like a must. They're like the Christopher Cross. They're like the Christopher Cross of sandwiches. Oh, okay. They're nice. Yeah. They're nice. They're just basics, you know. And I think she likes them because she sees them as something that's fancy. You know, like she went to a tea in England with Masood or whatever. And she's like, oh, my God, this is so fancy.

29:02You know what I'm really into, Masood? Tea sandwiches. I always have been. I always have been. How did you know that? And you brought me to a tea sandwich place.

29:12Ben Mandelker: Larissa goes, so good. Larissa has no idea what a tea sandwich is. She doesn't even realize that the sandwich that is in her fingers is a tea sandwich. She thinks it's a sandwich in the shape of a tea. Yeah. She thinks she's eating a fucking gossip session, you know? So, like, why are you eating the legs? You like fighting like? Because, like, I'm so confused. Like. And we see the Chihuahua versus Rottweiler fight. as Stephanie is saying. You try to belittle me. You try to belittle women to try to make yourself feel better. And she's like, oh, just my advice. You feel she belittled you. Maybe let's stick to this point without saying she belittled other women because honestly, I don't think she belittles other women.

29:51She belittles little women. You are a little woman, but not all women, only little women. Maybe say she belittles little women. This would be good. This would be okay.

30:02Ben Mandelker: Her favorite novel is literally called Belittle Women. Okay? Adriana goes, well, you didn't see her belittling me for two straight years, Julia? And Julia's like, Adriana, you're good with her now. Why are you going to the past? You have this thing about you. I love you. You go to the past all the time. And Adriana's going to the past all the time. Like, I don't know, maybe Julia being upset at Gertie being a little salty about a cruise line with Captain Sandy. That happened a year ago. or Julia being upset about Gertie not hopping on a Zoom link fast enough. God, I hate when people go to the past.

30:37Ben Mandelker: So Julia's like, you know, it's just you go to the past all the time. And she's like, because we're talking about the pattern of behavior. That's why, you know, all of a sudden, Julia has developed selective amnesia, you know? And we see a really great flashback montage of Alexia belittling women, chiefly. And Julia in particular, which was really funny she goes oh you know how to be a prostitute because you're russian so that's why that's why you know how to be a prostitute so funny so adriana thinks that basically julia's memory is clouded by her new friendship with alexia well it is up to her um it is up and done with her and todd and i'm not making excuses for her but alexia doesn't understand because she can't take jokes right now because she's very upset.

31:29And she's like, it's not my fault she doesn't have humor. Am I right? Am I right, guys?

31:35Ben Mandelker: Sevilla, here we come, like. So then, Julia, I don't know, this whole scene just is making me laugh. Like, everything about it makes me laugh. Just like Larsa in the corner going, Sevilla, here we come. I don't know why. I don't know Larsa even understands where she's going in the world right now. I think she thinks she's going to get off and like she'll be in Australia somewhere. She's like, where are the koalas like? So Julia is like, Stephanie and Alexia both have strong personalities and hopefully they can coexist on trip like Martina and Chris Evria during press tour because we're going to Spain for Alexia and I need everyone to get along.

32:16Ben Mandelker: Wishful thinking, right? Yeah, she's going to ruin it in two seconds. She's like, I hope everyone gets along. By the way, Alexia, she was talking about you. So now Julie and Larza take the beds and they're cuddling in their masks. And everybody gets in their red light. And morning. It's now morning. Fun fact. Did you know that Spain has five different types of Spanish, which in its own country, the first official language is Castilian. And Castilian has a list. So, for example, Barcelona, Ibiza, Drainiz. and then her chyron says professor adriana resident expert on all things i love this like little lesson i actually really liked it but it just was so funny that they inserted it out of nowhere just like here's adriana to tell us a little bit more about spain's languages because even brava even the editors at brava are like let's mock somebody for going back to school because that shit is hilarious.

33:18Can you believe this idiot is going to Harvard? What a loser!

33:23Ben Mandelker: Rumor has it it was created by an old king that had a lisp and he couldn't really say the S properly. I just love how she's also so delighted when she tells people, she's teaching someone information and she has a story later on that she also conducts with the same tone as if she's explaining about different Spanish dialects. However, It has a different ending. Well, I love the story too about the old king with the lisp. And I love it just shows how powerful gays are. We're like, guess what? I'm gay and you're all going to at least talk gay. You may not have a dick in your mouth, but you are going to have a gay tongue in your mouth.

34:03Do you understand? It is now said Barthelona. And that's it. And if not, you're beheaded. Got it, bats?

34:10Ben Mandelker: And we're calling it Castilian. Oh, because you live in a castle? No. it's because Julian Casillion lives next door and I really want to impress him so now Stephanie's group is in a van and she's like do you guys have your passports and Larsa says the only time the only thing like I've still got on me like is a good time like and I'm like ready to like have like a great time like Larsa when she said this with a big goofy smile on her face she was like trying to have this like like we're girlfriends going on a trip moment we're here but she started off in the wrong way because she said the only she should have said like the only thing i still have on me is like a bad time and i'm ready to have a good time but like she's like the only thing i still have on me is a good time um and i'm ready for a great time huh it's like okay sure sure that can be your like let's get this party started motto she's like i've been to barthelona like and ibiza like but i've never like been to sevilla like so like you know what like i love like cultures and like foods and like I don't know they have cars there right I love their cars I love their cars there you cannot tell me that Larsa eats on vacation or partakes in any sort of local culture you just cannot tell me that Larsa is shopping and partying and that's it yeah so Julia has explained she's like okay everybody we got a presidential suite but oh no No, I'm sorry.

35:39I'm Julia. You shut up. You shut up. Stop taking my line, little person. Okay, I'm Julia. So we have a presidential suite as one of our suites. But I have taken the moment to give the suite to Alexia because she is going through such a hard time. So I hope everyone is good. I waited to tell you until after I was off of your private plane.

36:05Ben Mandelker: Yeah, seriously. But guess what? The joke is on Julia because, hello, Miss Stephanie Shojai, you have been upgraded to a presidential suite for the second president who'd come visit us. And she's like, oh, that was not me. That was, I did not do that. And guess what? It was Masood. So she has like a big, she has everything. She has a patio. There's roses. They walk in, there's Chanel gifts. And then they have to sit there and watch her as she like unpacks all these gifts. and try to, like, pretend like they are not super jealous. I mean, those are really nice gifts. I wonder what he gives to the mistress.

36:40I mean, Jesus, giving that to the wife. Who are you giving the good stuff to? Well, I've had lots of men do very romantic things for me. One time a man took me on a helicopter all the way to his own private island in the Bahamas. And it was a pyramid. And there was a lady there who got us massages. from girls who had golf hats on, but nothing else. And it was great. Unfortunately, he died. His helicopter went down.

37:13Ben Mandelker: He died in his helicopter, flying back from his island, back to Palm Beach, died. The helicopter fell.

37:25Got Epstein on the way home. So, Stephanie is unpacking her presents. And meanwhile, the other ladies are coming in vans and they're called Team No Sleep. And Marisol goes, you just see them passing orange trees, which are orange. And they pass them and Marisol goes, are those limes?

37:50Ben Mandelker: Oranges. The capital is known for its oranges. Also, oranges are known for orange. Orange is the new lime. Am I right? Mm-hmm. So, Lisa, they find out that Lisa is landing soon. And Alexia's like, you know, I love that Lisa is safe. But, like, oh, well, you know, Peter, I would have, like, really appreciated if she would have sent us a text. But, like, not just saying anything had us really worried that she might actually be joining us. Like, I was like, please don't make it on the trip. But she's joining after all. We were so worried about her. Look how we acted at the airport when we said, where's Lisa?

38:22And then we got on the plane and we left.

38:28so then uh meanwhile uh the other women they've changed they've spiffed up and they're now sitting

38:34Ben Mandelker: at the hotel bar and uh there's like a uh there's this guy named oliver who works at the hotel and he goes oh i have to tell you i am obsessed with tomas he is like your best employee of all time and then we see that there's this guy tomas who's basically like a butler who was in this the room with Steph and she's like, okay, repeat after me, Tomas, no basic bitches, okay, no basic bitches. I hate to break it to you, but you're kind of the basic bitch of this group. You're not the rule keeper, Tomas, just repeat it. He's like, no basic bitches. She's like, very good, give him a raise. So then we go to Julie and Adriana going to a bar and Stephanie's there and she's like, you guys, this is my first trip without Masood.

39:19It is so hard without being with Masood. You know, like going down steps and not worrying if somebody's going to fall down them. You know what I mean? It's really, really hard to get used to. And not having to read them to somebody. Difficult.

39:34Ben Mandelker: It's just weird being on a trip and not being told that you're going to be going on another trip within the trip to go to Canada. It's just weird. But she says the only other trip that she's had without Masood was when she went to Columbia to get her boobs reduced. So, I just love the way she continues to brag when she finds new and interesting ways to brag at all times. She has such enormous boobs that they have to be reduced, so she went to Columbia to do it. Why are you finally getting an old man and getting your boobs reduced when the old man is starting to grow the boobs? It just seems like weird timing.

40:10Ben Mandelker: Yeah, well, it's like conservation of mass. It's a zero-sum effect. If his boobs get bigger, yours must get smaller. So she says, I don't like being away from my husband because I'm obsessed with him. I'm addicted to him. I love his energy. I'd love having him around me. I like to tell him things. I like to go to lunch. I like to have breakfast. I like to have dinner. I like to cuddle with him. I like his presence around me all the time. I give them five years. Yeah. Well, I'm sure you could have gone to a fabulous place with Masood and had fun, but you chose to be with us and thank you for that.

40:46Oh yeah, there's so many feelings that need to be discussed. But we need to move on and be friends. And while I do believe that Alexia should choose her words more wisely, I do not not like her. Two grown-up women fighting about dog breeds is pretty funny, I have to say. It was so hilarious.

41:05Ben Mandelker: Well, I think what it is is Napoleon syndrome. Because you go to sleep every night feeling very, very inferior. So you wake up in the morning and try to make yourself feel like you're superior. But in reality, every day you go to bed knowing you have self-esteem issues. and at this point, what's so funny is that when she was saying this, I literally thought she was talking about herself at first because she's the short one. She's the short one. That's what Napoleon Complex is. And then I started to realize, oh, she's saying Alexia has Napoleon Complex? I was like, do you know what a Napoleon Complex is?

41:33Ben Mandelker: And you realize you're the Napoleon here. She just described herself. And you know, you need to make yourself superior, but in reality, it's your sister that are bitches. Right, guys? Napoleon Complex. you need to make yourself feel superior like i don't know picking and choosing gets to go on a private plane with you i don't know and then bragging about all the chanel gifts your husband sent you when he upgraded you to a presidential seat like girl like for a moment i thought she was being self-reflective i was like i actually really appreciate that she acknowledges that she has napoleon syndrome and then it's like oh no her napoleon syndrome is so bad she actually thinks the taller person has it i've never seen napoleon syndrome be so ironic

42:19so adriana's like i'm like who are you oh so julia tells oh so like the other girls come in to the bar all the bus people so they come in and julia gets right runs up off her seat to alexia and she's like oh hello get ready we were talking about you but have drink first have drink first because girl over there talking about you. It's going to be mad. It's going to be mad.

42:43Ben Mandelker: And note, her tone was not, oh my God, we were just talking about you. Her tone was, get ready. We were just talking about you. You need to have a drink first. There was nothing about that that was friendly or that was peacekeeping or was in line with everything else that Julia said this trip was supposed to be about. And now she was being a little kiss-ass. Of course, she's running up to her like masters and giving them the information. So she can be like, oh, I was the one stand up for you. Everybody else hates you. I guess I'm your best friend here. So Alexis goes, well, I don't care. They can all go fuck off.

43:23Ben Mandelker: What do you mean they were talking about me? I told you not to talk about me. But it wasn't me. I wasn't talking about you. I was talking about them not talking about you maybe. And so Adriana sees this and she's like, I'm like, who are you? Do I even know you? Are you like a little puppy now? It's like she became Alexia's little bitch, so eager to run to mommy. Just a small fact. Mommies are called mommies because the real word is mother, which is longer, but people shorten it out of affection for the woman to birth them. And that woman died in helicopter. so Alexia Alexia is to tell everyone that Lisa missed the flight and has landed in Madrid and Larsa's like like I wish I would have like bet like on Lisa missing her flight like because I would have made like a million dollars like because I would have bet like a million dollars like and then well I guess I would have bet like five hundred thousand dollars like and then I would have won that back like so it would be like a million and like X, Y, Z and this and that.

44:30She's going to be late to her own funeral, girls, honestly.

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46:14So Alexia goes upstairs with her group and Julia joins them. And Stephanie is telling Larsa, we haven't been off the plane for two hours and this is how Julia repays me? She doesn't even let me finish the conversation. She just goes and gossip. The one horrible, disgusting move that she made. That is one horrible, disgusting, poor person, never going on a private plane again move that she just made. I hope she enjoys Southwest Airlines.

46:41Ben Mandelker: This is Stephanie who is like, this is how she repays me for me doing this for her when later on she's like, I don't buy things for my friends. So that way. She repays me. she got to go on a sponsored company old man jet. How dare she? I'm taking back her old man pajamas. She got free branded Shoma Group pajamas. That's valuable. So, yeah, Adriana's like, yeah, this is a new Julie. I don't know her. So then the other ladies are toasting to each other. They're checking their rooms. Marisol, for some reason, is dressed like she's in a hazmat suit. She's like an all-white and she has like a little thing over her head.

47:19Ben Mandelker: She thought she was going to Chernobyl. And then Julia goes, All right, everybody, stop the presses. I'm just looking for E.T. Give him up. Give him up. We can go back to our day. Does anybody have a stockpile of stuffed animals? He likes to hide in those. Well, I'm worried about radioactivity because the limes here are orange. That's scary. So Julia goes back to the original group. She's like, what have I missed? And Stephanie goes, Julia, I have a question for you. What the hell were you thinking? She hasn't even been here for two hours and you have to go gossip? Gossip? I said we were talking about you.

47:53Ben Mandelker: Like, oh, we were talking about you. Like, but why would you do that though, like? Like, why would you do that like, like, though? It's like so disrespectful. I thought we were friends. But did I tell her we were talking about? No. I said we're, hi, we're talking about you. Have fun. Look at you. You're here. We were talking about you. Lies, lies, lies. Okay, why are you stirring the pot? We just got here. You were the one that was like, this trip has to be fun. This trip has to be great. And you're already stirring the pot? It hasn't been 10 minutes. Like, the pot hasn't even been taken out of the box yet.

48:23Oh, Stephanie. No, no. Stir, stir, stir. You know what? Stir away. Because guess what? I have the biggest fucking spoon, bitch. And I'll be stirring all fucking shit.

48:34Ben Mandelker: Like, oh, jeez. No, literally, guys, I have, like, a really big spoon. Like, Masoud got it for me. It was actually hilarious. So when I was coming back from Colombia, when I had my breasts reduced, he was like, I feel bad that you went on a trip without me. So we went. When we flew back up to Canada, he found an enormous Montreal spoon. They call it Montreal spoon. So I brought it back. It's actually the only one in the entire world. So I have a huge spoon. Oh, my God. I'll show you guys when I get back to Miami. Yeah, like those are the ones you have to look out for. The ones that are doing all the dirty work, and then you're not knowing.

49:00Like Marisol. Marisol's definitely dangerous. Also, you know what's dangerous? Like spoons. They're really hard. Like nothing stays on them. I keep putting them on. I keep trying to put food on there, and it just falls off. You need to turn the spoon the other way. Oh, yeah.

49:20Ben Mandelker: Wow. Yeah. Spoons are scary because when I look at my reflection and I'm upside down, that's like, that's not right, like. So Julia is, Julia's like, Stephanie, I like you, but stop with the attitude, please. Well, I like you. But then you go and you tell someone we were talking about them just because, like, the only thing we were talking about was the situation. Like, you didn't have to go and tell her. You know, I have a, you know, okay, okay, I have a, I have a prayer I'd like to say for Julia. Lord, baby Jesus, protect us from people with hidden agendas as we strive to be genuine and others are not.

49:51Ben Mandelker: Amen. And Julia's like, well, cheers to Sevilla. And she goes, well, cheers to finding out who are real friends. You're never going to see my money again. You're never going to see my show again. So it's nighttime now. People are getting into glam. Marisol is, of course, leeching off Alexia's glam because it's Marisol. And the guy's doing hairspray on her, or whoever it was was doing hairspray on her. And Marisol's like, wow, God, be careful. I got hairspray in my khaki. Well, I'm glad you wanted to do this. Julie and I both want you to be distracted from thinking about ta-da-da. All right. Oh, yeah, I thought it was weird that Julia, as soon as she saw me, was like, oh, we've been talking about you.

50:41Oh, no, that's Alexia. I thought it was weird that Julia, as soon as she saw me, was like, oh, we've been talking about you. Like, I don't know if I should be happy or were they saying nice things? No, don't be so wicked and think the worst.

50:53Ben Mandelker: It was probably something great, you know? Yeah. Then we cut to Larsa. This is actually really fucked up. But the way it's treated on this show kind of cracked me up because it's so Real Housewives of Miami. So Larsa's in glam and she gets a phone call. She's like, hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? That part? She was saying a different accent. She goes, hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hola? This guy keeps calling me from different numbers saying I have a crush on you. And I've like blocked all these numbers. Instead of like, what country are you from? Like, I can only reject him in like the language that he's like accustomed to.

51:37So like, that's why I say hello in so many different languages.

51:40Ben Mandelker: is like larsa is literally being stalked and stephanie goes larsa are you dating anybody like i don't care like this is a scary situation and like stephanie just doesn't even like whatever are you dating anybody like nothing crazy like okay i mean this in a kind loving way i just feel like maybe you should try and stay away from athletes for a couple of months and try a businessman or i don't know what about that guy on the phone who keeps calling you i mean i I think stalkers could be a totally viable source of romance. I mean, he's making an effort, you know, and that's the important thing. No, but like, like I'm open, but like whatever, like the universe like has in store, like, you know, like if it's rich and like has like a career in like sports, then yeah, like.

52:24And then they show the guy that's doing their glam, but they don't give him a name. They're like Cesar and Sammy or whatever. I was like, can they have their own identities? Because we're only talking to one. And he's like, oh, you know what? I think that she likes being a MILF because if I was 25 or a 75-year-old with the same bank account, who would you date? And Larsa's like, but, like, I can't, like, go to bed at, like, 830. Like, my love here. Like, I go to clubs. I like to stay out, like, all night, like.

52:54Ben Mandelker: Stephanie's like, um, excuse me. We sometimes go out all the way to 930, okay? Because only bad things happen after 10 p.m., right? so Stephanie says that she doesn't have a guy for Larsa yet because Larsa has strict requirements aka they have to be athletes and Larsa's like I'm open to it I mean Steph wants to find me someone in finance or like a builder or something like that that's stupid I don't like it so Larsa is saying that she hopes that Julia doesn't go back and tell Alexia everything where Alexia's feeling like she has to like come into this trip like in a bad mood which is too late for that that ship has sailed and Steph is like well you know what these people need to get used to?

53:34If you stir the pot I'm going to stir the pot right back and I'm going to flip the table right back on you and I'm not going to stay quiet. Wow that's like a really big reaction for like I don't know like a normal day on Housewives. You're going to need to scale it back a little bit there. Yeah. So

53:59the flamenco seekers have been brought to dinner and lexi's like hello hello i love flamenco i love your work oh my god i love you come here give me a kiss you know what you do flamenco you know what you do put your foot down that's what i'm trying to learn to do with todd okay so maybe you can teach me put my foot down click click click click click click click click click click Check, check, check. I did it. Give me a kiss. Come on.

54:20Ben Mandelker: Well, this trip is really important for Alexia because we've decided it is. And it's my duty to distract her and keep her off thoughts of Todd. I mean, so I hired this musician. He looks like Kenny G, but they call him just the crazy guy who sings. And, you know, I want him to start to give us a good mood to begin the trip with a bang, you know? Well, I want to say something personal about love. I'd like to sing with my heart to Alexia. I would sing with my whole heart. ALEXIA!

55:01Ben Mandelker: For my ins! For my ins! I am!

55:15Ben Mandelker: It's so good. I want you to know Peter is so good. I want you to know Peter I'm crying. Alexia. I was. He was dying. He's like right in her face like. He's like sobbing. It's like, please, the love inside, don't let it go. Oh, wow. I'm crying in my khaki right now. It's just so beautiful. Everyone's like trying not to laugh. I mean, I don't know. I don't know what, like, I feel like this is like a certain style of singing. So I was, I was watching, trying to be respectful. Like, oh, this is probably just a local style of like incantation. But I was like, this is crazy. This is crazy. It was so funny because the drama, he was just so dramatic.

55:59Oh my gosh. And the song he was singing was so funny. He's like, oh my god, the son you gave him, that man didn't understand your love. Ladies are cracking up. But Marisol and Alexi are both sobbing. Oh my god, it's me, I'm dying inside, this is beautiful.

56:22Ben Mandelker: And I have to say, everyone's trying to be respectful, but they cannot hold their laughter. They are dying inside of like larsa it's just like she's just like like she's just trying to cover her mouth everyone's just like trying to be like chill and they're like

56:46this guy was just so dramatic and larsa's like i don't like know what's like happening like like alexia marisola like crying but like i don't feel like any emotion but yeah do you ever feel any emotion? Like, have we ever seen Larissa with any emotion? Ever? It's been a long time.

57:05Ben Mandelker: I don't think Larissa feels anything anymore. I don't know if she has... I don't think sensation is something I think about with Larissa. There's a lot. So, Marissa was like, well, I did not ask Danny to play that tearjerker. That was on his own. Holy crap. Wow. Oh my goodness. I was crying so much that my knees got lubricated.

57:32and then it ends and Alexi goes Olé, Olé so they applause and then caviar is served and Julie gives her speech like, welcome to Sevilla Sevilla Sevilla Sevilla we've put a trip together to welcome you all we have had different reasons to be here, me, scary god babysitting children um larsa i don't know she knows where she is stephanie mean person needs mean place to go but we wanted to make it special for you alexia and she goes oh you have you have that was so special that was so special i died inside and came back to life thank you ladies thank you thank you danny i love you danny i love you don't change danny you're a star smaller star but still a star you're in a constellation of stars okay i'm like the moon of the stars okay okay little

58:23Ben Mandelker: dipper i love you little dipper i'm ursa major you're ursa minor oh my my friends are my family and like the only reason i'm still standing is because of my friends you know so like no matter what if we have our differences we come together and we support each other even except one person where's lisa where's lisa so she's like uh she's on a train because oh well you know peter she missed the flight so she had to go to miami london london madrid madrid to get on the train to and we see a map and she's you know that lisa had a million bags and she went alone because these people the production was like we paid a lot of money for this flight and you just were like you just shrugged it off good luck you're carrying your own bags through planes trains and automobiles they didn't even give her a va they're like good luck hope you can make it and i like that alexia is so dramatic she makes every city twice she's like miami then london london madrid madrid then and she went to Madrid.

59:20And then from Madrid, she was coming from London. So then London, she went to Madrid. But then when she got to Madrid, she had to go on a train from Madrid to Seville, from Madrid. It was like from Madrid to Seville. So it was like London, Madrid, Madrid, London, London, Seville, Sevilla, Seville, Seville, London, London. It's like, okay, it's three places. So it was like, I can't even imagine little Lisa getting on a train with her luggage. She must be like, oh my God, there's so much luggage. I'm just a little lady. I've got so much luggage. What is she going to do?

59:47Ben Mandelker: what what you're gonna do i think i think they like think of the train as being this thing with like it's like donkeys are on there like people have bird cages selling spices like just like like peasants and like beggars and everything but um but reality is i mean if you have like more than one bag on a train it is very stressful and you know that lisa has like five giant suitcases i really don't i really don't know how she did that i don't know how she did to the train. How do you do that with so many bags and you're alone? Mars is like, oh my god, she might end up in like Poulin. Or like Italy.

1:00:24What if she ends up in Poulin?

1:00:27Ben Mandelker: I would love it if Lisa ended up in Poulin. She said, well, I'm in Wausau, everyone. So, Adrian's like, I feel like she's paying the price, just like that man who died in a helicopter. No one wants to be on the train. So, Stephanie announces that tomorrow she's taking everyone to a luxury flamenco dress store because they're going to get luxury dresses because she's down to me and she knows this town too because she's been here many many times so she knows where the luxury flamenco's at. But they have to have appointments to go into the store and like what happens if there's the Lisa appointment so they decided that they're going to give Lisa the last appointment of the day and if she makes it she makes it which makes me wonder if they're setting up some sort of drama that Lisa shows up last and there's like no more good like flamenco dresses left and she has a meltdown which i feel like will probably happen yeah but like i feel like it's rude like yeah it's real she needs to check in with us i mean why is she checked in with us yeah she needs to check in that's what i always say you know i always say you know peter you gotta check in you know and then one time peter didn't check in and frankie was there i said how could you not check in in front of frankie come on come on bro come on Alexia full on has like her nose up in the air.

1:01:43Ben Mandelker: You know, when she, her impervious, impervious nose, whatever it is, imperial maybe. When she has her nose up, she's like, you got to check in. You have to check in. How do you not check in? If you don't, you have to check in. If you're going to be late, that's fine, but check in. You're not going to check in. Imagine me like last week at the preppy party wearing glasses right now. She'll take me more serious. She didn't check in. When you are late for your friends who work so hard to organize a trip. And by your friends working so hard, I mean people at Bravo. And your friends take all the credit for it.

1:02:12Ben Mandelker: It is not the right thing to do. That is not right. You must check in. She thinks we are not important enough to make a call. Enough of that, Lisa. Like, but, like, we had the best time on the plane with Stephanie. Like, Marissa's like, I am just so happy for you. Wow. A plane, a private plane. That was amazing. I enjoyed the tuna fish sandwich that somebody threw out of my head while I was getting my ankles shook out in TSA. Yeah, we drank like, we danced like, it was fun like. I felt bad to split all of you guys up, but you know, I did ask you first. I did ask you, Alexia, first. And Marisol's like, yeah, when we arrived, did you guys feel a weird vibe?

1:02:52Ben Mandelker: Sorry. It's this Lieutenant Marisol showing up to do Alexia's early work right now. Let's get the ball rolling on the fight. I felt it was weird too, Kiki. Yeah, it was weird. I felt that. Well, yeah, because then Julia came up and she said you were talking about me. So, yeah, she said that, you know, it would have been nice to get a heads up about it, you know, like maybe like a text or something, you know, because you're supposed to be like a heads up. She was like she was like basically getting off her chest. Yeah, like the time I went to Columbia to get a breast reduction, I just like to get it off my chest.

1:03:24Ben Mandelker: Oh, well, yeah, well, you spent time getting to know the other girls, but you judged me from day one. That is not true, Alexia. Well, at Marisol's party, I thought you were going to sit down and tell me how you couldn't take all of this. attack all of us and you know it turns out all you said all the hurtful defamatory lies and how could you accuse me of belittling women to make myself better like i know you guys i know you're new but these girls have known me for years so you're just gonna come into the group and change the dynamics and make me look at or seem like somebody i'm not okay first of all you're not gonna tell me what dynamics i'm gonna change and not gonna change and be sorry you're offended but sometimes the truth hurts Napoleon.

1:04:03Ben Mandelker: I like Stephanie taking a stance on which dynamics she's going to change. You don't get to tell me what dynamics I'm going to change. Dynamics all I want to. She goes, who do you think you are? I am Stephanie Shojai. She goes, bitch, and I'm an Alexei Napola. Okay? So there, you're Shojai, I'm a Napola. So look at that. Let's see. And I think you're very insecure. I think you're very insecure. No, no. No, no. You have insecurity. You're insecure yourself. That's what i said about her right she's insecure when i tell you even though it was all over the trailers i let me tell you something i cracked up with her thumping her chest yelling oh you know why because my confidence it bothers you you know thank you very much because that's what happened And look, my confidence hurts, okay?

1:04:56She's like, oh yeah, jealousy hurts. What am I jealous of? What am I jealous of? What am I jealous of? What? What? Just, you need therapy.

1:05:04Ben Mandelker: You know, and when somebody comes in with, you know, youth and beauty and a lot more money, Alexia thinks she's a star. And then that stardom might get threatened. And I think that might be a point of contention. It's like, why are you trying to start a problem with me? That's your tone of voice, okay? That's the tone of voice you take. And she goes, okay, then match my tone of voice. Oh, I'm matching it right now. Imagine your tone of voice right now, okay? So Julie's like, oh my God, would I have known I would start a crazy conversation? I never would have done it. I feel so bad. This is not what dinner is supposed to be about.

1:05:36Ben Mandelker: This classic person who says something like that and is like, oopsie, I never would have known that when I made it sound like they were talking shit about you that she would get mad. Guys, por favor, where did this go wrong? She's like, Marisol, I have tried at every event to talk to Alexia. Do you remember the time I told her her husband was garbage? I mean, come on. It was like a hug. It was like a warm hug I was trying to give her. And I have reciprocated. By calling me a chihuahua, well, you take things too personally, my dear. It's like, you called me a chihuahua because you said I barked.

1:06:11It's like really hard to go to the toe. Alexia saying you take things too personal is funny. Like Alexia. Yeah, Alexia of all people. Yeah.

1:06:18Ben Mandelker: It's really hard to go toe-to-toe with Alexia-like. Brutal, really, like. But at the same time, I don't think I've ever seen Stephanie this heated-like. They're butt heads because they're alpha. They're fighting about dog breeds-like. Okay, well, why did you pick a chihuahua for me? She's like, well, because you sound like one right now. Well, why did you say I'm a kiss-ass? Because you think you can buy friends with all your riches. She's like, oh, did I buy you? Did I buy you? Did I buy you? It's like, you literally did. I'm sorry, what did you say? I couldn't hear with this red light mask on.

1:06:47Hold on.

1:06:47Ben Mandelker: What? you literally bought them. And then when Julia didn't do as you wanted her to do, you said, this is how you repay me, implying that you paid for something first. Exactly. So Kiki's like, this is the most entertaining dinner. I'm on team Kiki. I'm enjoying myself so much. This is great. Like, she's like, you are dangling carrots. You know what? Who's going to get on my jet? Oh, I don't care about fancy things like that. Okay, look, I'm friends with Mary. So she looks like a newspaper. with a head on top of it. Did you see that when Stephanie was going around saying, did I buy you? Did I buy you?

1:07:24Ben Mandelker: Did I buy you? Kiki goes, give me a Birken bag. She's like, I'm for sale. She's like, you can buy me. I'm for sale. So Gordy's like, oh, what happened to let the good times roll? Spain knows we're here now, that's for sure. And Stephanie's like, Alexia, I will take this moment to be the bigger person. I genuinely like you. Okay, can you tell? And I've not once said anything bad about you, except that you're insecure and shallow and stupid. Okay? But I was rubbed the wrong way. And that's it. She goes, oh, you know what? I was rubbed the wrong way, too. That's why. Because, like, I was rubbed the wrong way, too.

1:08:02That's, like, crazy.

1:08:03Ben Mandelker: I was offended when you called me a kiss-ass because it didn't go in hand with calling me a big head 20 minutes earlier. So if you're going to insult me, they need to be consistent, Alexia. I need consistency. Okay? But did it go hand-in-hand with you talking about Todd? was that hand-in-hand with something? I don't even know what hand-in-hand means, but I'm gonna say hand-in-hand because you said Todd was garbage, you know? The one comment I regret is calling him trash. Because just because he is trash doesn't mean I have to call him trash. You know? And she's like, I only called him trash because I'm trying to be on her team against the guy that she says she's breaking up with.

1:08:37So, she's like, I'm just trying to say Todd sucks. It's just my way of saying it. And Stephanie's like, I'm not here to tell you what to do with your life. She goes, but even, like, you know what, like, I get it because like stuff that I've told you guys about my relationship, like, you know what? I'm so regretful, you know, because you say things out of anger and then it gets you girls mad. And I know you have my best interest at heart. So like what I'm trying to say, Stephanie, I love you. Like we're best friends. Right. And she's like, yeah, I love you too. Like, I can't even believe this. We're going to be the best friends.

1:09:04Yeah. Like we're going to be together forever. What the conversation turns so quickly.

1:09:10Ben Mandelker: That's why I was cracking up. I was like, I love this show. Cause they went so hard at each other. And then they're like, And Alexia's like, now they're fighting over how good friends they'll be like. No, we're going to be good friends. No, we'll be great friends. We're going to be great friends. No, we're going to be, you're going to love the way you look. No, you are men's warehouse. So they cheer and everything's fine. So now it's 11, 20 PM. And Lisa arrives after nearly 24 hours of traveling. And she's like, after traveling, which felt like weeks, months, years, decades. scores. Millennia.

1:09:48Ben Mandelker: I'm here. I'm here. I made it. So, okay, what room am I? 125? What room is Marisol? Could someone take my bags? I've had a long day. So she goes up and she's telling us her travel story. She goes, it was so scary traveling alone. Like, there was one point where no one spoke English in this train station. It was so scary. And I had to lug my own bags because no one was helping me because no one knew what I was saying. It was so hard. People don't even understand hand motions at the train station. I was doing this. Ah! Ah! And still nobody helped me. It was crazy. You're saying you've been living in Miami for like 20 years and you still don't know enough basic Spanish to ask someone to help you?

1:10:28Ben Mandelker: That's so Lisa. She doesn't even know how to say please. Like, ayúdame, por favor. Like, please, come on, Lisa. So, although, to be fair, I live in Los Angeles. But I have tried to learn Spanish. I just keep starting and stopping. So, she goes up to Marisol and Lexia's room. Marisol's like, oh, we were worried, monkey. You finally made it. She's like, oh, it's fine. We're on vacation. But what happened to you? Pish posh. No, typical monkey. When she does something wrong, she comes in with games. Look at her pish posh games. That's a fun one. She says pish and she says posh. I mean, she's just ridiculous.

1:11:12So, Lexia's like, but you know what? you coming late that was so rude and disrespectful to us like really i was so bad that was like

1:11:19Ben Mandelker: really honey honey we're not doing that right now we're not doing it i was on a train it was disgusting i saw so many maids on there look that's narcissism right there you know what at least take accountability and lisa's like i don't want to do this i came to say hi to you guys the first thing i did was come to the audio well help us help you because everyone's pissed so you're gonna have to deal with it tomorrow I have my reasons okay and that's that yeah but like why not text the girls and tell us your reasons like hey I'm on the flight you know narcissistic behavior narcissism it's like I can't I can't get into it with you because I need some time to figure out what my cover story is to make you guys all feel bad for me but it's been like 24 hours and you're like hee hee ha ha you know the girls are very very mad you know they feel like you're very disrespectful.

1:12:10You're not even going to get pajamas, whatever that is.

1:12:13Ben Mandelker: So sue me. Okay, I didn't hurt anyone. What did they lose? They had dinner at the hotel. Everyone's very offended, monkey. Okay, well, they can deal with it tomorrow. Fuck them, because when they understand what's really going on, they'll feel like assholes, and that's all I'm going to say about that. Let me give you a hint. It has something to do with LELY!

1:12:36Ben Mandelker: I guarantee you nothing significant is going on. No, but I don't need a whole fight of yelling at Lisa for being late. I mean, she paid the ultimate price, which is having to travel alone with all of her bags on three different like the three different cities and taking 24 hours. So I say, you know, she suffered. She suffered enough. She's so everyone. Let it be. Thank you all for being here. We will be back with Orange County and we will catch you all on the next episode. Bye, everyone.

1:13:37Ben Mandelker: Bye Sheila Weber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go, we all go for Hugo. Jamie. She has no less namey. She's our kind of mess, it's Jennifer Messer. Sips some scotch with Jessica Trotch. She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock. Kristen the Piston Anderson. Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey B. K-sirah-sirah, whatever we'll be with Lauren Sillsby. Brigging the funk, it's Leslie Plunkett. She gets an A from us, it's Lindsay D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McHenry We love her on the rocks, it's Melissa Cox Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the Berg This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian I love a ya, Olivia Williamson Tastier than Flanderson, it's Rachel Manderson She sure is swell, it's Raquel Yes we canna, it's Sadana Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman Let's share with Sharon Eldridge Darn Skippy, it's Tippi.

1:14:38And our super premium sponsors. She's VVIP, it's Amanda V. Can't lose when you're with Amy Baldwin.

1:14:46Ben Mandelker: Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O 'Neill. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily Sides. Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland. Let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs. It's our queen, it's Queen Laifa. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. Hail the cork master, the master of the cork, Jennifer Corcoran. We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo. We love him madly, it's Kyle Podchadley. In the study, with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock.

1:15:26Ben Mandelker: Gee, it's Lisa H. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Barron. She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy. Always killing it, it's Lola Alkalani The Incredible Edible Matthews Sisters She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose There's a Chance of Meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud Neat, it's Ronit Feldman She's the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke We Cannot Tell a Lie, it's Sarah Talafson Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony Please don't stop, it's Soli and Pop Let's take off with Tam La Plaine It's always a good time when you're wasting time with Bravo She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar. We love you guys.

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1:17:12This episode is sponsored by McDonald's.

1:17:14Ben Mandelker: I'm having my hot Caesar summer, Ronnie. Yes. Caesar sauce? I feel like we don't talk about Caesar sauce enough, because it's so, so good. I love to dip everything into it. Have you ever dipped fries in Caesar sauce before? I mean, I just have. Wow, it is delicious. Caesar sauce is like a Parmesan, garlicky blend with some lemon in it. And you can dip anything in there. One thing I have been known to do is to stop over at McDonald's and go to the drive-thru and get myself a Caesar snack wrap and just dip some fries in the Caesar sauce. Also, the crispy strips in the Caesar sauce. Honestly, try it.

1:17:48Ben Mandelker: It's really good. Listen, I say if you put Caesar sauce on something, that automatically makes it better. Yes, that's really all you need is the Caesar sauce. I think I just want to have just a constant supply of Caesar sauce and put it on things at all times. Yeah, I'm a straight up French fry and Caesar sauce kind of a boy. That's what I love. And that's how I'm going to go down. Right now at participating McD's, the$2.99 Caesar snack wrap is making me rethink my go-to order. Caesar sauce at participating McDonald's for a limited time. Prices and participation may vary. This message is brought to you by Cologuard.

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