#2993 Below Deck S12E15: Behind the 8 Course Ball

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1:28It's when there's so much that crappens.

1:58Ronnie Karam: Literally every week with this girl. You know, I love my board games, and I was reading through the rules of a new board game. And at one point it said, like, you know, put your piece here. And then because of the consequences of your actions, you must do this. And I, like, really started to laugh. I just started to hear Jess voice. The consequences of your actions. You put the piece in the wrong place. Consequences. Yeah. Jeez. Lots of consequences of actions going on over here. so many cons but you know what good to see this this cast is just so horny they're like you know what we've got two episodes left let's change it up again let's fuck kyle over again let's do it again i am so over this season i'm not gonna lie i am over it and i i don't think i've ever seen a below deck season with so many interesting people but turned into such a dull season for me i i just I can't deal with it anymore.

2:53I think in the beginning, I mean, I love Barbara and I love Solaine, even though Solaine is the worst. I think they've got like a good mix of personalities. But I think that the emphasis on these love triangles is driving me nuts because I just don't care. I want to see work ethics and I want to see work ethics violated. I don't care about love triangles on this boat.

3:17Ronnie Karam: Especially with a bunch of people you don't want to bang. You know what I mean? There's like so many people and they're all, you know, cute people and stuff. But I think it's only interesting, like when you kind of want to bang them. There's got to be like some element of you want to have sex with them. And that's why you're interested in who they want to have sex with. Right. But it's weird. It's like, I don't, I don't, I don't know what I'm trying to say. Like, they're all cute people. I'm not like ugly shaming anybody. I just, they're all just so icky, especially Damo. I just find Damo to be so gross.

3:46Ronnie Karam: I don't understand. I don't understand. I just don't get it. He looks like a cartoon chicken first and foremost. He's like a cartoon chicken. And that already is like a boner killer. You know, it's like, it's, it's too much. He has, he's also like a dick. He's a total dick and he's free and he frames his dickish behavior as some sort of like, um, a personal journey that he's on a selfish period, if you will. And I'm like, no, you're a dick. You're just a dick with, And also there's something about like, you know, like sleeping naked, like people sleep naked. Like I get it. You know, you don't have to wear your undies.

4:24Ronnie Karam: I don't care. Well, I don't care how you sleep. Yeah. But you've got a camera right in front of your face. And I find every morning him waking up just open legged to the camera is just gross and pervy. It's like, leave the camera people alone. Like there are people in the fucking room, you know, the camera, the, what do you call it? The viewing room? What do you call that? Where they've got all the TVs in troll room. The control room. They don't want to see your wiener flopping all over the place all the time. It feels like he's going to get arrested for jerking off in public. He just seems like one of those people.

5:00Yeah, I'm sure he'll be on OnlyFans soon. He just seems like the type. It seems like that's going to be a path for him. And God bless. Maybe that's the lane that he should be in. But I don't know. I'm a little over Demo myself. and I think I just I don't know like I also think that the producers kind of like jumped the shark a little bit on their guests you know we always know that there's going to be some trashy guests here or there but it felt like really this time the producers were out to cast yacht guests that were like outrageous look it's porn stars and look look it's some more wild people look it's I don't even remember half the guests but every time I felt like there was like a new set of people on I was like really And then they wouldn't even get it.

5:45They wouldn't even squeeze it for all the juice they can squeeze it for. I just feel like we need to sort of like get back a little bit to what Below Deck is about, which is like awful rich people and the maids who serve them and don't always serve them well. Like, that's what I want to focus on.

6:02Ronnie Karam: Yeah. Okay. I hear you. We'll take it. Thank you. Hopefully someone takes this to production. Take it. I'm taking it to the top. I'm taking it. Taking it to the UN. It's an international issue. But anyway, here we are with some below deck. Also, last night we did crappy hour, super fun, every other Monday, 530 Pacific. And when we're not doing that on Mondays at 4 p.m. Pacific, we're doing Amazon Live. So that's coming up this coming Monday, September, whatever. Not just that, Ronnie. Tell them the exciting news for this one, the next one coming up. I don't know what it is. That we're going to be on the Amazon Prime TV.

6:43Ronnie Karam: Oh, oh yes, yes. We're going to be on Amazon Prime television. That's right. We're going to television, finally. Yeah, we'll have more details on how you actually find us on there. But yeah, I mean, that's literally the same show. It's just that you can watch it on your TV. You can watch it on TV. Basically, we can say we have our own TV show now. I don't know if we legally can say that. I don't know if that is even true, but I just tell my friends that. I've got my own TV show now. You can watch it. Guys, can't be with you Monday. I'm going to be live on television. Okay. Sorry. We're crafting our future Emmy submission.

7:18Okay, everyone. Now come look at the teaspoon that I bought.

7:23Ronnie Karam: Oh, you're busy Monday. Yeah. I'm busy too. Cause I'm on Amazon prime. So yeah, I'm so excited. Cause you can tell, but anyway, yeah, tune in for that. Do it. Okay. So let's, let's get in to below deck season 12. episode 15, all the single ladies. So this is another trope I can do without like the, Oh my God, there's like a bunch of ladies together on a boat. It's like the fifth time this season we get it. Is it that crazy that ladies hang out together? They're like, Oh my God, can you believe it? Ladies are hanging out together on a boat and then the ladies come on and it sounds like they're a watch what happens live audience every time.

8:05Ronnie Karam: Like, can you just come on and enjoy the boat? How come every time you come on, I have to hear this.

8:13Ronnie Karam: Oh, hey, do you guys want a glass of champagne when you come? Champagne! Hey, look, it's the crew. Oh, my God, they're so cute. Oh, my God, who's single? Who are we going to fuck? Oh, my God. Oh, God, do they make them do this? Because I hang out with a lot of ladies, and I can tell you this is not how we act everywhere we go. Do you guys want an appetizer menu? Shut up. Just shut up. is Stephen Colbert coming out shut up Stephen Colbert I think there there must there's something about stepping onto a yacht that makes people live up to their like stereotypes or something like a group of women come on like whoo champion but then a group of guys come on they're like bro yeah come on we're gonna go like get sloshed and then like a group of gays come on they're like can I put the anchor up my butt yeah I wanna blow that I wanna blow the captain you know we're all such stereotypes it's always like that they're like oh wow primary bedroom okay hey, what about my primary asshole who's going to lick it?

9:12Hey, guys. You're like, really? It's like we, I don't know if we've ever had a group. Oh, no, we have had a group of lesbians. We had Gigi Fernandez. And although she was, I guess maybe, what is the lesbian walking, lesbian group walking onto a yacht stereotype? It's like, oh, very nice. Very nice. Love that. Love that. I guess that's like the lesbian stereotype of when you walk onto a boat. I don't know what the lesbian, like the lesbian thing is.

9:38Ronnie Karam: Well, she was more like, yeah. Well, it was very sporty. Yeah, this is how we do it in tennis. Yeah, she did like the lesbian who plays sports stereotype, which everything was like, oh, wow, you served that well. I mean, I served it pretty well, too, for years. Am I right, ladies? Because I'm an international tennis star. Okay. In that situation, tennis stereotypes overtook lesbian stereotypes. So we didn't really get to see what the stereotypical lesbian reaction would be. Well, I mean, a lesbian stereotype is sporty, right? So that's true. There's a lot of overlap. Just, yeah, sports. Big overlap.

10:12Ronnie Karam: Let's just be as stereotypical as possible as we go onto the boat, you know? Of course, two gay guys sitting here bitching. I mean, we're stereotypes too. I guess that's just how the world works, you know? So here we go. All the single ladies, season 12, episode 15. Last week, we got so lame in the mess hall going, can you make rules about me, Captain? You make rules about me? I'm not a children. I'm not a children. And then being like, oh, I don't think she understands. and say the China command works. Yeah. She needs to understand hierarchy, which is Turkish, of course, for hierarchy. Thank you.

10:50Still learning my languages from my missus. So Fraser has to sit her down and he's like, listen, Soleil, you're the reason, you know, you're here for a reason because you've made a huge progression. You went from being absolutely terrible to absolutely still terrible, but like a little bit more charming about it. It's a huge progression, Soleil.

11:13Ronnie Karam: I have to say, one thing that's really impressed me with you is that your eyebrows came on completely wonky and in six weeks have somehow improved themselves massively. I'm not really sure how that happened, but congratulations. Is it because you always fall down a staircase every episode? Did it just bang your eyebrows into place? You're here for a reason. because you're willing to have sex with multiple people on camera and frustrate everybody around you. She's like, well, okay, this is clear. One more try to left. Good, good, good. Anything else? Anything else? What else? No. Well, if you want to tell me that I'm hideous, I'll always accept that.

11:55So then downstairs, Hugo's talking to Jess. I guess we're talking about the aftermath of when Jess yelled at Soleil. And Hugo's like, you know, it feels good in the moment to yell at someone, but it doesn't really, didn't really help anything. That is true. I will speak to her. Jesus. I know like my behavior was not appropriate, especially for a place of work. Now I must face the consequences of my.

12:19Ronnie Karam: Truly. She really is like one of the men on Bravo who's constantly apologizing. It's like, do something wrong, then apologize. Do every episode. She has to apologize at this point. I literally can't even say consequences of my actions. It's not laughing. of my actions. I mean, clearly, I had all this anger built up in me with her that I didn't know I had. You were the one who dumped her. What are you so angry about? You dumped her, ma 'am. Yeah. No, it's just because Soleil stood up for herself afterwards and was like, that was bullshit what you did, even though it was Soleil who was playing games first, but still.

12:58So, yeah. So now Jess is like, yes. Why are you calling her Soleil today?

13:05Ronnie Karam: don't call her soleil you're giving her too much credit you're giving her too much artistic credit I moon fried her up I was like you were soleil today soleil

13:20soleil you know what I decided she doesn't the n was like a baseball on my porch you know what I keep this now until you start acting better I keep the n you know Solana and Jess are, I don't know if you saw, but Barbara was on Watch What Happens Live wearing a vest, which didn't really make sense to me. But she told, it was like, she was like wearing, it was like, I didn't understand it. I get it.

13:48Ronnie Karam: You know how many times I've tried to pull off the vest? I just can't do it. I mean, I've tried every decade, I feel like, to pull off a vest, like vest fashion, and my body just won't do it. I mean, I think it's the muffin top, but I'm also long torso. I just, I don't know. I've never been able to make it work, but I feel like it should work. It's hard. I had a fleece vest moment back in around like 1999 to 2001. Cause it was like, you know, people would wear fleece vests up in the Northeast a lot. It was like a cool look. You get your LLV fleece vest or your Patagonia fleece vest. I had my Sigma Phi Epsilon fleece vest.

14:23So I was both wearing fleece vest and I was being fratty at the same time. So I was really going two for two. And then I moved to Los Angeles and I think I wore that fleets vest once or twice. And the amount of horrified looks I got, it was like, okay,

14:35Ronnie Karam: go get in the garbage right away. Okay. Oh yeah. This is a, this is like a vest, like one of the ones you're talking with, like a Northeast vest. Yeah. Right. I just, I'll show the people. Yeah. So I think she was trying to go for a look. She was, cause there's like a, there's like, you know, there's like that photo booth thing that's backstage and she has like a whole look and she was but the thing is that like maybe maybe if you see the whole look with the vest and the skirt it it has a look but a lot of the pictures are just like top up so it just looks like she decided to put on some like finance bro finance bro vests and go on to watch what happens live which was i don't know i think it's a little bit of a misstep luckily she's so gorgeous it doesn't even matter but yeah there it is kind of cute with a little the little tight shirt underneath I mean, I like the little Brazilian...

15:27Ronnie Karam: Is it a Star Trek vest? I can't tell. It's like Star Trek hunting. Oh, it's a Brazilian flag? Wow, they have diamond flags? Brazilian Star Trek, which is basically just like a lot of super hot people flying around in space and dancing. We will boldly dance. Now there's a Star Trek I would watch. What is the expression? We will boldly go where no one else goes. Where no man has gone before. We will boldly samba where no man has sambowed before. That I would watch 100%. Well, I know I need to speak with her because I'm not appropriate behavior and I have anger built up and it's not a good look. Shame on me.

16:07Ronnie Karam: Shame on me. Bad. Bad Jess. Bad consequences. I didn't even say what. The reason why I brought up Barbara on Watch What Happens Live is she said that when shooting finished, they were all in a hotel and Barbara and Jess were going to be staying in a room together. But they got into a fight because Barbara still suspected Jess had a thing for Solane. So they got into a fight and Barbara decided not to spend the night with her. And then when they were like, she was walking down the hallway with Damo, like a door opened and Jess and Solane were together and Solane was naked. And so that didn't work out.

16:38Yeah. And Barbara's hunch was correct. So you wear that vest because it's a vest of truth.

16:44Ronnie Karam: That's what I say. Yeah. You know, when they were talking about seeing each other after the season, I was like, this girl is going to cheat on you the second she gets a chance. Why are you even giving this cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater a chance? Because she's going to cheat. She's going to cheat. You know she's going to cheat. And especially talking about having a long-distance relationship with Jess. That girl can't even not cheat while she's in front of your face. Like, she'll do it right in front of your face. She's done it before. Someone who advertises. I'm glad Barbara's getting away from her, hopefully.

17:17Yeah, Barbara is like a hot lesbian, and she could pull some A-list lesbian tail. That's what I say. And she deserves it. Not Jess, for crying out loud.

17:27Ronnie Karam: Barbara is Gigi Fernandez worthy, okay? Barbara could be running Hollywood right now. She gets in with a power lesbian producer, and she is set for life, okay? She can do it. I have all the faith in her. Okay, so Jess is a loser. Okay, so then it's the preference sheet meeting. Please, let's continue doing it in separate rooms. Because for whatever reason, that works for production this year. I hate this too. It's so weird. It's why I just want heads of departments. So, yeah, we have this thing and Fraser's saying, Deb is a mother of three from Philadelphia. And you know she is because her name is Deb.

18:07Also, the co-primary and neighbor Erin, an attorney and mother of four who loves dirty martinis, blue cheese stuffed olives, and reruns of Mike and Marley. Erin's sister, Brianne, and Tara are incredibly picky eaters, doesn't like beets, Alfredo sauce, fatty or chewy meat. So, Anthony, I'm sorry you will not be able to serve your chewy, fatty steak and beets in Alfredo sauce today.

18:31Ronnie Karam: I'm sorry, you're not allowed on the boat. I get people, it's like, I'm alert. If I eat this, I'm going to break out in hives or something. But someone who's just like, guess what? Beats Alfredo sauce and fattier Chewy meat No You're not allowed here What are you five I like that the chef calls him out later And he's like yeah they're very picky What are they children I think I'll just serve them dinosaur chicken nuggets That's what we should serve them And that's what it sounds like Ew creamy sauce Now is that mean fatty Please don't make the meat too chewy It's time for a commercial It's time for a Crappin's Commercial.

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20:59You know, Alfredo sauce, first of all, I can't think of the last time I had Alfredo sauce because I just feel like it's so retro. It's not something I gravitate to anymore because I used a lot lately. Really? I mean, when I was a kid, I loved it, but I haven't had it a lot.

21:13Ronnie Karam: I have a friend who's into it, and so every time, well, I have a friend whose husband is into it, so every time we go out, he orders Alfredo, and we share everything, and I don't have the heart to tell him. This is a heart attack. Why are we ordering heart disease? Like, we're all older. We shouldn't be ordering this. Wait a second. I thought Alfredo sauce was salsa. No. Am I incorrect? That's Heather Dubrow. But Alfredo sauce? That's when my helper has an attitude. Okay. Fredo gets a little saucy. My helper. My Nobu flatware transporter gets a little saucy. We don't call them us boys anymore, Ben.

21:56But I have to say, though, that, like, if Alfredo sauce were served to me on a super yacht, like, if I'm not, like, allergic or have an intolerance towards any ingredients in it, I'm going to eat the Alfredo sauce. I'm sorry. I just will. Because it's like you're on the yacht. You're supposed to indulge. Like have some Alfredo sauce on the yacht. Now, do I want beets in the Alfredo sauce? Probably not. But by the way.

22:19Ronnie Karam: Yeah, it's just they've got this whole thing in their minds. This whole nightmare in their minds. Like beets and Alfredo sauce. Like just come on the boat. With fatty and chewy meat. Yeah. Here's some beef tallow. Beef tallow served on a bed of beets topped with Alfredo sauce. honestly we probably have seen stuff like that and i want to say also ronnie since um uh as long as we're talking about alfredo sauce that there is a recipe that i will send you that uh is like a tofu alfredo sauce where you actually know blend up tofu and i was i was skeptical and it worked it worked absolutely fucking letting you know no just letting you know it works no i don't need alfredo sauce worse than i already don't like alfredo sauce uh so okay so it doesn't end there.

23:05Ronnie Karam: So she doesn't like beets, Alfredo sauce, fatty or chewy meat, no red meat or pork and gluten-free as well. Fuck off. Like this is just too much. You're not this important. You know what I mean? You're not this important. I hope you brought your own fucking bag of gluten free bagels. Just sit in your room and eat that. I don't even want to talk to you. It's too much. Get a personality. And also, by the way, Aaron, neighbor and attorney, mother of four, you need to have more in your personality than dirty martinis and blue cheese stuffed olives. And that's it. Yeah. Come on, Aaron. Now, Fraser then says, any fish, including shrimp, pork, beets, celery, carrots, eel, tomatoes, are those things they are not going to eat?

23:52Ronnie Karam: Any fish, including shrimp, pork, beets, celery, carrots. No, these are all the things they won't eat. Do you know what you're going to do? Celery? Yeah, because pork's in here, so... Okay. Well, celery is annoying. I don't understand celery. It's so stringy and it's hurtful. It's stringy, but it's not hurtful. It has a place and it can actually be delicious and wonderful. Like this whole new world of celery salads. I'm all about it. But that being said, okay, fish, I get it. Some people just don't like seafood and shrimp. Obviously there's like kosher issues or there's also allergies. Pork. Okay, fine.

24:28Beets. You know, I know there are people who don't like beets. They find them to be too grassy. Well, guess what? Why don't you start enjoying some grass once in a while? That way you can enjoy beets. Am I right? Get me a cocky. But I love beets. And I think, but whatever. I'll accept, but I'll accept not doing. It's just too much. You know, you can have something. But celery and carrots are like so standard. I'm sorry. Celery and carrots, they should be let in. Okay. I'm sorry. This is too much.

24:51Ronnie Karam: Yeah. And tomatoes. I mean, you're just, you're just ruining it for everybody is what I'm saying. You know, you're not alone at home. You need to like be chill when you're with a bunch of people on a boat. Yeah. You can pick one thing. You can't pick 20 things. You can pick gluten-free. Okay, fine. But you can't pick gluten-free and chewy meat-free. You can't do everything. Pick one. You don't get to include beets and Alfredo sauce. Like, I'm already hating these people. Yeah. I don't like the Alfredo sauce really bothers me because there's something so specific and stupid about it. It's just like, I don't know.

25:25I mean, I understand if you don't like fettuccine Alfredo, you're like, please don't serve me fettuccine Alfredo. But I don't know, in the context of everything else, it's like at this point, you sort of deserve fettuccine Alfredo. Tomatoes, I understand. Some people have tomato allergies. And I don't know, tomatoes are oddly divisive. Again, celery and carrots is where I really am drawing a line here. This is where you're just being a stupid person. I'm sorry.

25:46Ronnie Karam: Yeah. I'm going to say something really controversial. I think we need to move on. I'm getting too worked up. But there's nothing else that happens. I hate these people now. I'm like, I literally hate these people now. These are the consequences of addiction. Fraser's like, wow, she sounds like a joy. Night one, guests will be wearing pink and want decorations to scream Malibu Dream Yacht. Just burn the fucking boat down at this point. I know. Just burn it down. We have to end the season this way for real. Explode the boat. Explode the boat. And then on day two, we're going to go through a scout to Happy Bay.

26:21Happy Bay is pretty cool. I wouldn't say it's actually happy. It's quite sad. It's a tragic place. I cry there all the time. It's quite small. It's in a beautiful pocket. It doesn't matter. if it's the last charter or the first charter, they're still guests, and they'll still be paying to be here. So we're going to give them 100%, and I'm ready to go. So let's get it done. Let's get these pink ladies to Happy Bay.

26:40Ronnie Karam: Happy Bay, a gorgeous place, unless something goes wrong, and a line is tied, and a beat-free woman chokes on chewy meat and dies in a pink Malibu Barbie in fifth. But it should be fine. It should be fine. This just in. I'm hearing that Happy Bay is the world's foremost place to get Fettigine Alfredo. Is that going to fly with a guess? No. All right. New location. We'll be going to Fettigine Alfredo Bay. Surely nothing will go wrong. Chewy Meat and Beet Bay. All right, everyone. Get on board. Also, dinner should be an eight-course meal inspired by fire and ice. Oh, really? Well, surely she hates either fire or ice.

27:27Ronnie Karam: And how do you want eight courses when you just listed half of the food in the world that you won't eat? No. You're getting fingernails. I'm giving you a plate of fingernails. That's what you're getting. The only way I'm going to support this fire and ice themed meal is if Fraser serves Aaron A. Or crafts some sort of like George R.R. Martini. Then I'll be okay with it. Or if they die by either.

27:55Or if they recreate. The last season of Game of Thrones over this meal and have a dragon torch them all.

28:03Ronnie Karam: At this point, I'd prefer the Game of Thrones ending, you know, just disregard everything and just make the lamest person on the show the winner. Just just have it be them. I won't even say this because maybe someone hasn't watched Game of Thrones. Do we think that these women realize are they doing a Game of Thrones thing here or are they just saying fire and ice? I think no, because they're having their fire and icing on their pink Barbie Malibu mansion night. They're like, guys, we want to have a Game of Thrones themed evening of fire and ice. There cannot be Alfredo sauce. Like we weren't going to include Alfredo sauce in the Game of Thrones tribute.

28:41Okay, just wanted to double check. We do want a red wedding without beets. Oh, well, now you're fucking me over.

28:47Ronnie Karam: Well, also, we can't have tomato sauce because I don't like tomatoes either. So I guess no pasta. nothing pasta-y. They literally can't do the Red Wedding episode. I'm so mad. It goes fine, nice, everyone eating different stuff. How are you supposed to do this? And Fraser's like, we'll find a way. And by we, I mean you will find a way as I stand complaining about how crazy you are in the doorway. I don't know. Okay, go ahead. Here's an idea for you, Anthony. I know that you've had a very difficult season and having to do an eight-course meal or all these dum-dums with different dietary restrictions would be very difficult.

29:25So how about I organize a time-sensitive fireworks display that has a hard timing that you cannot move whatsoever and means you have to serve your dinner as early as possible. Would that be okay with you? Because that's what I'm going to do.

29:41Ronnie Karam: Yes, I would like to arrange some fireworks, mostly for us because we deserve it at the end of this season. Anthony goes, let's go to hell. yes Anthony I like Anthony's new like oh I've not messed up in a couple of weeks so I'm manly chef now let us go to hell we go to hell together I go to hell I am manly now cause my eyebrows are thinner than ever so let's go to hell this is so obnoxious this fireworks display it's totally fucked over Anthony they have this the fireworks are at like 9 o 'clock or something which means and there you cannot you cannot make them wait on the fireworks the fireworks can go off at 9 no matter what which means that this guy who will most likely get in the weeds with his meal is going to be forced to give a shitty meal because fraser put a time constraint on it when they really should be starting at eight o 'clock and be going until midnight with an eight course meal so this is fraser i'm sorry this is this is this is undermining by fraser right here i'm at the same time we've seen anthony's eight course meals one dish is going to be a plate of one asparagus and then one will be a hard-boiled egg and then one will be a celery, you know, probably.

30:49Ronnie Karam: And they'll be like, oh, I almost killed some of a celery. I mean, I need to be more careful of this. But, I mean, we've seen his intricate eight-course meals before, so I'm not too worried for him. He'll survive this. And if he has to say, no, I can't do it then, then you go to the beach and you cook the chicken because I can't do all of this. Yeah, I just think this is shitty. I think the, I don't know, Or this idea that it all has to be done by the fireworks is dumb too. I think they should just time it so that way they take an intermission in the middle of their meal. But as a result, Anthony has a time constraint the rest of the episode that we have to all sit in and do it.

31:23Because of the freezer. So now it's time to go out. So everyone goes to La Petite Place for dinner. And then Barbara and Jess basically leave the table to go make out in the bathroom for a long time. Which is just kind of like, can you just wait? Do you have to make out at the dinner table? Or while you're waiting for food, can you just do this after dinner?

31:47Ronnie Karam: It's just too much. Well, who's fucked who this season? I'm asking for a friend. Let's talk about sex, baby. So Kyle's like, me and Damo every night. We fuck every night. And then Barbara and Jess return, and they do a toast for the last charter, and I don't know. It was kind of, I think they're ready for it to be done too. And Barbara wants to play Mary fuck or kill, which sounds like a terrible idea. Just kill all of you at this point. Yeah. Let the boat sink. But Jess says, I would fuck rainbow and I would marry so-so and just for the plot. And then Barbara, I will have to kill you. I'm sorry.

32:32Oh no, Barbara is dead. It is the consequences of my actions. No,

32:39Ronnie Karam: And Selene's like, Jess, you did first. And then after I married Damon and sex Kyle. Nice sex Kyle. Yeah. So then Selene and Jess have a talk. And Jess is like, I just want to say sorry for yesterday. It wasn't right to call you out at the table. She's like, oh, in front of everyone. Yes, I am talking. Okay. I'm apologizing to you, but you do not get to speak as part of this. So yes, I did it in front of everybody and it is not okay. And I'm very sorry that I brought up personal issues that I still had to deal with into what happened that day because it's completely disrespectful. And I know you don't deserve those consequences of my actions.

33:20Ronnie Karam: Yeah, yeah. I heard it before, lady. And Celine's like, uh-huh. Okay. Yeah, glad you realized it. And she's like, why do not forgive her? I'm not good with her. She apologized. And what? You kill someone after and after. Oh, sorry, I killed you. No, too late. Too late. them. So then they both agree that they're good, even though they're not good. And then they return to the table, and then they start talking about waking up, and now they're going back to the boat, and they're hanging out at the bar on the boat, and then Jess and Barbara go to the guest cabin, and Barbara's like, I am sad that I'll not see you anymore.

33:55She goes, yes, I have no plans. I know you're working, so I'm chill. I do want to travel to the US in a little bit, so can I come with you?

34:05Ronnie Karam: And so So Jess is like, wait, you want to see me? And Barbara says, yeah, you know, there's difference between what I want and what I can. You know what I mean? I'm going to be work, so. Well, Barbara has a grip on me. I really fucking like Barbara. I don't ever want to mess up Barbara, but I will if I have the chance. First thing I can do. So if I'm in a relationship, I want to be there. I hope Barbara feels the same. I hope she feels the same about me. So now, up on deck, Rainbow's sort of flirting with Damo She's like, Damo, catch me, catch me I'm gonna punch you in the fucking face Are you trying to make out with me again?

34:40I'm gonna punch you so hard, let's go to an island You wish, I'm already fucking deep in those blue, blue eyes And they're brown, oh my god, I am so flirtatious

34:49Ronnie Karam: Yeah, they try it But Damo's bored He's like, yeah, I can't really figure her out She's not interesting to me anymore So, I've always had eyes for Solane She's smoking hot She keeps flirting with me. I can't really understand her eyebrows. And there's clearly something there. We've got three days left. I'm going to fuck over my best friend on this boat. Let's do this. By the way, there's clearly not something there. Damo is the sort of guy where a girl's nice to him. He's like, wow, she's flirting with me. Like, we have an attraction. There's nothing there. I mean, you guys made that in a pool, but that was for revenge on her part.

35:24and there's like if there was something there i'm sure you would have known from selene's part

35:30Ronnie Karam: damo's going through a middle age crisis early because he's got so much sun damage and i think he's just like grasping onto his last few years of like playing the field because he's just grasping at whatever he can at this point and no one really likes damo you know and to hear damo talk about it he's like the sexiest guy on this boat and maybe he should be like he probably works out the most, you know, he's like the blondest, I guess people like that, but ultimately no one's really into Damo. He's just kind of there when they're bored, you know, needs me need to make somebody else jealous. So, um, it's kind of fun watching the drain.

36:07Yeah, he is. Cause Fraser like literally broke up with his boyfriend sort of for Damo and then still didn't really even care about pursuing Damo. Right. Like they made out in a pool. Fraser called his boyfriend was like, guess what? I made out with someone. Okay. We're broken up. I guess I can make out with whoever I want to now. And then still didn't make out with Damo after that anymore. So yeah, I think that Damo is sort of just like, um, he's just some of those, he's like a sad, sad little fire and survivor that never becomes more than a spark and then goes out.

36:38Ronnie Karam: Yeah. So he's decided he's going to fuck over Kyle and he ends that by saying, and you know, I'm not going to feel bad. We know. We know. You're just hurting other people's feelings to make yourself feel more virile. And unfortunately, it's not really working. You just look sad. You've announced this a few times that you're not going to feel bad. We get it. You're in your selfish phase. Selfish phase. So he and Celine hug goodnight. They're a little flirty. But she's not picking up what he's putting down. I'll tell you that much. So now it's the next moment. Not yet, but we see in previews that she eventually does.

37:16Ronnie Karam: And he's doing it in such a gross way, too, because he's like, so how are you with the whole world going against you? He's like, didn't you start these fights? Didn't you start a lot of these fights that have been happening? So now he's got her down. So he's like, okay, so now she's feeling bad about herself, so I'll move in and get a little potatoe. Yeah, well, any port in a storm, I guess. And that was a nautical joke because of a low deck. So it's six hours until the Charter. kill you. Any port in a storm can kill you. You're not. Medmore! Medmore!

37:54Happy Bay dead. There's a bridge and there's Medmore and there's Happy Bay. One of these things is going to kill us. Now it's time to get ready for the charter. Six hours till charter. Everyone's doing all this fun stuff. doing the cleaning and stuff and Fraser is saying how there's one last trip. It's like, honestly, I don't even know how we fucking, I know how fucking done we all are, but just bring the energy for the guests. So Lane, if you decide to throw yourself down the stairs this time, really do it with some passion, okay? Because this is our final charter and we want to go out with a bang and get a good tip.

38:32Good luck, children.

38:32Ronnie Karam: I love you all. So now Damo and Selene are flirting some more and hugging and Selene's like, I like Scottish, but I think we call Sean Damo. He always tried to put his foot in my shoes to understand the whole situation. And I have good energy too. It's a good baby, baby crush. Baby crush. All right, deck team, gather round. I want to talk about this mad war situation. It looks to me like you're getting your shit sorted out on deck. So when we go anchor up in Marigold, that's right. Twist, we go into Marigold. And I want you to come to the wheelhouse. We're going to watch me. I want Hugo. You're going to watch me drop the anchor.

39:11And then at the end of the day, you can drop it at Citizens Bay. Are you happy with that, Hugo?

39:18Ronnie Karam: Wow, perfect. I appreciate that. This is going to be amazing. I've worked my whole life to watch someone drop an anchor. I'm really taken aback, but I'm also really excited about anchoring. I want to be captain of a vessel. So, you know, it's like great to be given freedom to actually drop the anchor. So Captain Carrie is pulling a Captain Sandy where she's like, you know what? I want to watch someone grow. Push that button. Push it again. I'm your mentor. That's right. You want to sit on my lap? You want to sit on my lap and hold the wheel? Okay, let's do it. So Anthony and Fraser are in the galley and Fraser is like, Chef, dinner service on the last night.

39:55I think it needs to be at 7 o 'clock latest because I'm trying to organize fireworks to go off in the middle of your dinner. So how long do you need? Three or four hours. so okay and if you do lunch at one at the beach you could be back in your galley by two o 'clock and i was also thinking that maybe you could do lunch on the beach and be back by six o 'clock and have your eight course meal ready by seven o 'clock is that okay

40:19Ronnie Karam: he's like oh just tell him no tell him no tell him you need something simpler for the beach then if you want that because that's crazy like having to make lunch then take it to the beach then cook live at the beach, then go back, no break, and go straight into an eight-course dinner? That's too much. They're trying to break the chef. Yeah. Is there a world in which Anthony can maybe do some of the prep the night before, though, for this eight-course meal? Like, that might help a bit, right? Like, do some of the sauces or some of the cold items? Well, I mean, a lot of it, he's very practiced. He whips out the lava cake again, which I think was still solid on the inside.

40:57Ronnie Karam: But so then Damon and Barbara are in laundry and they're talking about her and Jess. And she's like, I don't know. It is what it is. And he's like, but if you were on the same boat, she goes, but it's not the case. We're not on the same boat. He's like, but if you were on the same boat, would you be married? Why would I think about things that could happen if they're not going to happen? I don't understand this. I don't understand any of this. Please leave me alone. Please take your dreams and ambitions and take them somewhere else. I'm trying to do laundry. Commercials. Here comes one right now.

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42:16Ronnie Karam: It's the best place to find great deals on products you love. and there are amazing sellers with great, great taste and they're going live all the time, like 24 seven. You can comment in real time and they'll just show you like closeup of clothes. You'll be like, hey, can I get, can I see that a little bit closer? I wanna see that detail on that shirt and they will show it to you because it's real time. And you can sell too. Do you have clothes, bags or accessories sitting in your closet that you don't reach for anymore? Whatnot makes it easy to turn them into cash, connect with shoppers who share your style and have fun going live while doing it.

42:47It's amazing what you can find on there. I literally just purchased a mid-century modern dance yellow paella pan for$35, and I've seen it listed elsewhere on the internet for$80. It was a bargain.

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44:02So the guests arrive. The girls trip and Fraser gives them the tour and everything. And then it's time to lift the anchor and the anchors are in the pocket with consequences. says. And then the lines and then there's a bridge and un-med mooring themselves and they get out of the same parts and they did a great job.

44:25Ronnie Karam: I love Anthony coming out and talking to them. He's like, oh, well, we have some restrictions on you, but don't worry, ladies. I'm here to take care of you. Okay? Anna doesn't eat tomato. And she's like, yeah, no tomatoes. Okay, no tomato for you. Yeah. I'm Tara and I just want to go on the record. I'm not really gluten-free. I don't have an allergy. It's just the sensitivity. So don't go crazy with that. Now, chewy meat, watch your ass, okay? Chewy meat, you will fucking die. But you know, everything else is fine, except celery. Not celery either. Alfredo sauce, huge no-no, Anthony. Okay, no pressure.

45:00No pressure. It's not an allergy or a sensitivity. It's just a way of life. So we're very anti-Alfredo here. And no beets. No beets or Alfredo together. Okay, thanks. No mirepoix. So celery and carrots out. Okay, no onions. Plates, I actually don't like my food served on plates or bowls. So maybe a napkin. Anything that's good for a napkin, I would really enjoy. Thank you so much.

45:22Ronnie Karam: Don't worry about me, though. You know what I'd love? I would love if you could get a giraffe on the board and I could just eat it while it's alive, slice by slice. Could you do that? But no salt and no gluten. Okay, get a giraffe, a gluten-free giraffe with no Alfredo sauce or beets. I don't even want it to have eaten beets before. Don't cook it. It gets chewy. So then Kyle is like, one thing we will not stand for is chewy giraffe meat. No, no, we just won't. We won't do that. It's just a sensitivity. Get a thin giraffe. I want a thin giraffe. So Kyle is like, so what do we think of the ladies on board demo?

46:01It's like, oh, it looks like they might need a couple of rods on a jet ski. Am I right? These guys are very horned up. They're hot for these single ladies. And then we have Deb who's like, Well, so Fraser, there's four girls in our family and then it's the friends. So, you know, for team fire and ice, we're going to do all the sisters or the ice because they're all bitches. And then the friends are fire because they're hot sluts. Okay. So just make the teams that for when we do that.

46:28Ronnie Karam: Yeah. The sisters are ice because we're not nice to strangers. And then the friends are fire because they're always trying to break sisters up. Am I right? So fuck those bitches. Okay. Serve them all Alfredo. Glutenous Alfredo. Hot Alfredo. Sizzling hot Alfredo Now Kyle and Selene are making out In their little smoking spot And Hugo is taking pictures as evidence He's like oh yeah I guess that's the smoking make out section Hey guys did you hear I'm going to drop an anchor later Pretty huge day for me Pretty huge Then Anthony is He's struggling in the galley He's like I won't give them as many options But like chicken and beef Like making simple food fancy It's like possible And then everyone sits down for lunch And one of the guests is like Rainbow Give us the scoop on everybody There's three single ladies So who is single?

47:22Come on Rainbow Tell us everything we can tell You're the popular girl on this boat Everyone loves talking to Rainbow Give us the dish Rainbow

47:29Ronnie Karam: What kind of question is that? You're not fucking anybody on this boat lady Okay You are the customers You don't get to just walk into the place And ask you you can start fucking What's wrong with you? No No, Deb, sit your ass down. Rambo's like, well, we actually have a fully single crew. Not many of them would last on a tiny island in Holland. I'll tell you that much, but they are horny as fuck. So go ahead, go to town. And bachelor number one, it's Damo. And they're like, oh my God. Oh, woo, woo, Damo, woo, woo. You know, this crew is sad when they're wooing Damo like that. That leathery, highlighted, you know, weaner out perv.

48:20Ronnie Karam: They're like, yes, Damo. You won't eat gluten, but you'll fuck Damo. Okay, I'm taking none of you seriously. He is the Alfredo sauce of humans. So Damo. Nothing says yeast like Damo. So they asked Emma where he's from. He's like, I'm actually from Pith, Australia. I'll be from wherever you want me to be. And she was like, oh, well, you know, I studied at university in New South Wales. He's like, oh, no way. Oh, you know what? I'm sorry. I studied whaling in the South. Let's get that confused. And then one lady goes, well, I studied abroad. This is Brienne. By the way, I don't eat beets. I studied abroad.

48:57It was a long time ago since you, and I'm just, I'm just entering this into evidence since you say you're from a foreign country. I just want to say that I studied abroad just in general, just studied outside of America. So I think that makes me also a great connection for you. So maybe even a little bit better than New South Wales, because it's a little bit of a broader category. I just studied abroad. So I don't know. Well, you know,

49:17Ronnie Karam: I'm studying abroad right now because I'm reading a book and we're abroad. So basically I'm the most fuckable one here. I'm like, no, no, you're not. I was actually abroad. And I was abroad. Who was studying abroad? I got two broads in there. So pretty much. I just want to say, Bryn's a slut. Okay, Bryn is definitely the fire trying to melt the ice. All right, girls. Hi, it's Deb here. I just want to say that in college, I did a study abroad program, and I was living right next door to Deimos. My proximity kind of beats all of you guys, so I'm just going to put that out there. Right, Deimo? You can hear that part.

49:50Ronnie Karam: Deimo's like, wow, couldn't have been that long ago. What was it, two years ago? You spring chicken. They're like, oh, my God, Deimo. Deimo. Deimo. Instagram all time. growing up I always had my sister's friends around and they were always saying Damo if you were only 10 years older well look at you now you look 10 years older were they witches because I think they cursed you the full sentence was Damo if only you were 10 years older we would really be able to get the maximum use out of our moisturizer on your face Damo if only you were 10 years older, we could try you as an adult for all the grabbing you do during our slumber parties, you fucking perv.

50:36Ronnie Karam: Now go put on some pants. If only you were 10 years older, you could be in the before column of the La Roche-Posay commercial. So

50:51Ronnie Karam: For a young age, I was always flirting up. My first time with older women, I went as a junior counselor to Brazil and fell in love with the staff member on my camp. It was six months. I mean, I was 16. She was 21. 16-year-old Damo's egos look, oh, yeah, pumped up the wazoo. A 21-year-old was fucking a 16-year-old. What was the name of this camp, sir? Could you please give me the name of this camp? Because I'm calling the Popos. It was called Brazilian Star Trek. I dare you do that to Barbara. She's like, oh, I will never wear this vest again. Thank you. I know. she's like yeah she gave me a bestie up to be hooked up by the way i'm still actually kind of like a little fixated just going back a second ago to what we already talked about but like i really am amused by this girl brian brian who's who like after when damo says that he's from australia and then aaron says i studied at university in new south wales i just the fact that Brienne tries to get in on it by saying, I just studied abroad.

51:58Like that's a very common thing that a lot of people do. I unfortunately did not get to do it, which is my own fault, but like to be like, well, I studied abroad. Like, no, Brienne, you haven't, that you don't get to jump into the flirtation because you've studied abroad. You need to have an Australian specific anecdote to go along with it. There's no fun connection. There's no sense of kismet just because you left the country once.

52:21Ronnie Karam: She's like, well, Deb likes blue cheese and olives. So. Also, I just want to point out that New South. Abroad, though. Abroad. By the way, for the record, New South Wales is on the entire other side of the continent from Perth. It's like saying, like, oh, where are you from? California. Oh, really? You know, I went to school. I went to, I spent like two months in Maine once. Like, oh, okay, great. Thank you. Also, trying to impress Damo on where you studied is hilarious because Damo's a dingbat. Like, he doesn't care. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's like, why would you do that? So now Damo is talking to Hugo, and he's saying, these guests are so spicy.

53:01Ronnie Karam: Oh, these guests are spicy? Well, you know the rules. Don't get caught. That's the rule now because it's you. If it's Kyle, the rule is you're a damn alcoholic. Let's get him fired. But for you. So the guests are laying out and hatching plans on how to snag one of these eligible bachelors. Yes, and Kara's like, Jess, Jess, Jess, radio, okay, radio, Jess, are you on the bow? Are you on the bow? He's like, yes, I'm on. I am. Radio is on. Ready for you, Captain. Radio, release one, one shot, one shot, one shot. Consequences going into the water. I've dropped the consequences. Three shackles on the consequence.

53:41Ronnie Karam: Fantastic. Let's put the ball up. You really nailed it this time. Now, Jess, Jess, please come to the bridge. Hello, Captain. What can I do for you? I just wanted you to know people could have died, but they didn't. So we live another day. All right, go back and get ready for Happy Bay where people might die horrendously. So then meanwhile, Jess calls her friend and tells her about Barbara and no one cares. And then Anthony is getting ready for dinner and he's like, okay, tonight I'm going to make something as pink as possible. And Faith is like, can you focus on flavor and scents over color? color is not important because everything I'm doing on the table is pink and food just needs to be good and not pink also.

54:25Cause I've got the pink covered. And so Fraser was saying how Anthony is feeling the pressure because we're so close to the end and he wants to do himself proud and daddy at all. But he's, but, but he's not, Fraser's going to make sure that the one thing that Anthony will not do is fail. He will not let it happen. Even though he will add a ridiculous time constraint.

54:45Ronnie Karam: Exactly. Fraser's like, yeah, One thing I've got is the chef's back He will not fail I will be here telling him Stop worrying about colour Get your food out faster Add a course Do it before fireworks Go to the beach Cook some chicken Get back in time To do this all before fireworks Everything's ruined God I love me Do such great work So Rainbow's happy Because Sosa was on her shit today She's actually like focused So Rainbow is a happy Rainbow today Yeah, you need to keep people like Celine miserable. That's how they work the best, you know? That's true. The only time she works really well is when she's very sad.

55:27Ronnie Karam: So just keep her miserable, Rainbow. So Damo is talking to the ladies. He's like, hello, ladies. It's me, Damo. Who wants to ride a banana? Oh, I've ridden a banana abroad. Yeah, I rode a banana close to Australia or Ireland. are you from one of those places? I forgot where you're from. I once had a pineapple in Japan. So I think that's, you know, they qualify. Okay, Brianne. Brianne's trying it. Poor Brianne. Hey, do you have any gluten for Brianne to ride? Just kidding.

56:07So, um, um, then this girl, Michelle says, well, if you guys, if you guys drive, you guys have to be shirtless. So then they, like, radio captain be like, is that okay? And he's like, whatever the guests want. That's what they get. It's not called Happy Bay for nothing. All right, take off the shirts on magical mics.

56:28Ronnie Karam: Magicless mics. I'm looking for the, I'm loving the energy of these girls. They're flirty. They're fun. I don't see them crossing the line. I mean, has anybody grabbed someone's wiener and stuck it inside them yet? No, Big Ang, they haven't. All right. Now, if I didn't have a dad bod, my shit would be off too. Trust me on that. Sir, we have seen you shirtless. And if that's a dad bod, sign me up. Okay. That is a goal, sir. Hand it over. Hand it over. So now it's the bananas, fun times. And now it's time for the guests to get ready for dinner. And then Damo and Hugo and Kyle are all checking out all the guest picks.

57:06And everyone's like changing their outfits and everything. and Fraser has an announcement, which to us, he says, today's theme is all dialed up. This is all about femininity. It's fun. It's bubbly. My tits are bouncing, which is a good reminder that I need to stop eating for the next week. I'm hideous.

57:24Ronnie Karam: Hideously fat. Today's theme is hideously fat. I'm sorry. That's personal. Dooled up, I suppose. Today's theme is all doneted up. I'm sorry. That's me in a mirror. My tits are bouncing They need to be still There can be nothing but skin there So I'd like to give myself credit for doing a good job As the first obese chiefs do So Blow back So One guest is like So what was your favorite part of the day The other one saying jet skiing with Hugo Wow I felt like I was holding on to a big bottle Of Alfredo sauce Sorry, Deb. Sorry. Didn't mean to mention the A word.

58:14Ronnie Karam: You guys, you want to watch Damo's game? Let's watch Damo's game with women. So he's flirting with Celine. And Celine's like, can I offer you some chocolate? Do you want some Nutella inside? And he goes, you know I want more than Nutella inside. Okay, well, good job. I can see why you're not getting laid on this boat, sir. So then we go to Anthony. He's freaking out. And he's prepping dinner. And he's like, tomorrow's going to be crazy. So many courses. Tonight doesn't make sense to do crazy menu. You know, I feel these women. They're pretty, but damn, they eat like goddamn kids. Like, maybe I should make mine as old chicken nuggets for these ladies?

58:54Ronnie Karam: Mine as old chicken nuggets? By the way, I would not be opposed to receiving some chicken nuggets. like chicken nuggets are delicious i will take some dinosaur chicken nuggets for a little snack absolutely give me a nice dipping sauce i'm not opposed just saying that right now you're no dab that's for sure sure that's true so and then anthony says so we need to know what tara's having because it's no carrots but no carrots for tara oh god good old you know you know the reason why tara doesn't like carrots is because she probably was called a carrot in middle school i just have this feeling i don't even remember what tara looks like but i'm just sensing they'd be like Tara more like carrot.

59:32If you add a C to the end of Tara's name and then spell it backward, you know what spells carrot.

59:36Ronnie Karam: So she's like traumatized for life. It's like the least creative bullies ever. They're like Tara. What can we call Tara? Scara? No, no. Carrot. Carrots. Carrots have that. All right. Her name is sort of spelled like carrot kind of backward. So let's call her carrot because you know, kids do that shit all the time. You know, they come up with some weird thing but they're just like playing someone like carrot carrot carrot carrot tara carrot carrot what's tara doing she's part of a crudite play stupid tara carrot tara's like the only way i got past the trauma of being called carrot was to um woo at a lot of things and refuse to eat off right now so whoa i just did it i'm feeling better i do feel better now.

1:00:25Ronnie Karam: I do feel like I've been studying abroad. Whoa! Whoa! I'm feeling that. That felt better. I did. Fucking brain. I was about to make my little anecdote about the time that I watched Priscilla Queen of the Desert, which took place in Australia, and then she comes in with, I studied abroad, and now what do I have? I have nothing. I can't even flirt with demo anymore. Cock and a frog and a rock. God, he didn't get that one. Oh, God, I'm leaving it. Whoa! Whoa! I've never been to me. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God material. Guys, what are these sexies single ladies talking about? Let's find out.

1:00:58Ronnie Karam: So one of them's like, you guys, marriage is not like the be all end all. Okay. And Michelle says, Oh no, I agree. At least 30 % of my couples are miserable. Last week I had a couple that was, that was, I was finalizing with them and their wedding is in like two months and they fought the entire time and she's laying him out the entire time. And I'm like, you know what? This is why I'm single. Okay. This is why you're not going to be a marriage counselor for long. I don't think you're allowed to do. Is she a counselor? or what is she? I don't know what she is. It sounds like she's an aspiring e-card writer.

1:01:27Remember those e-cards that were always like, he said, I want my pork chops, and I said, I want my divorce. And it's always like a lady smiling. I feel like this is what this lady is doing, Michelle. You know? This is why I'm single.

1:01:39Ronnie Karam: That's funny you say that. I just got an ad for e-card served to me, and it was like, these are great e-cards. And one of them said, stop waiting till you die. Tell everyone to fuck off right now. And I was like, I miss E-cards. I miss them. So is that like retro 50s lady, like a housewife? Yeah. That's one of the like 50s. Wine o 'clock. She's on a phone with a cord. Yeah, exactly. Till death do us. Wait. I'm waiting for it. Waiting for it. So she's bitching about marriage to probably all the married ladies. They're like, yeah, Michelle, marriage isn't everything. We know. We know. We're all miserable.

1:02:19Ronnie Karam: Right, girls? Well, I mean, Brian literally is. But everyone else here miserable? Right. Yeah, we all hate being married, Michelle. It's not, you made the right choice, Michelle. Well, guess what? These ladies paid to be on a super yacht, and now they're going to get some real fancy food. Specifically, chicken payard with red wine sauce and garlic mashed potatoes. Congratulations on a very basic, nice meal. It's just basically like a fried chicken cutlet With some potatoes on the side Yeah I like that he joked about chicken nuggets But then made them a big chicken nugget Ultimately That's basically what he did Oh what is the plan for this evening ladies And I plan on Sitting around and waiting for more pounds To just be added to me from breathing air How about you?

1:03:10Oh well We hope the sexy men are going to put on A fashion show for us for a single lady's marriage overrated. Am I right?

1:03:20Ronnie Karam: So, yeah. So now we have to suffer through another school play put on by the Below Deck crew, which is just people dressing in pink and posing a lot like they're in a fashion show, which I don't really understand. But first we get dessert served, which is a lava cake, but this time it's sprayed with pink glitter. So, pink. Disgusting. Nailed it. Nailed it. So now it's 10-15 and now sexy deck crew fashion show that come out and Hugo is like dancing and they're all loving it. And he's just having a great time and hamming it up. And then the one guest goes, alright, alright. Who's hot? Who's not everyone?

1:04:02Damo. He's my future ex-fiance. Say.

1:04:07Ronnie Karam: I studied abroad. Oh, wait. One more time, ladies, for the boys. Woo! Woo! Woo! So then Solaine and Rainbow are laughing That they're getting along so well They can't believe that Rainbow's like I'm so proud of myself I did not fight with Solaine I did not fight with Rainbow She's like yeah I'm proud Really am bro I'm really really proud of you bro Let's go get a good night's bro sleep Okay So now is the next day And Carrie You know Well actually one thing that happened in the middle of this is that Kerry went up to the log book in the middle of the night. He was sort of like in his boxes. He was out of uniform.

1:04:52And he just decided, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to look at that log book. And he looked and no one had checked in on the boat because they were all doing sexy fashion shows. So now it's the next morning. And Kerry is like, Hugo, Hugo, can you please come to the bridge, mate? He's like, all right. All right. So last night, I came up here to check on things before I went down. And it had been, I think at least two hours since an entry was made in the logbook. That's two and a half hours that the position of the vessel wasn't checked. And what was the reason that it wasn't done? Because we could have crashed right into Happy Bay.

1:05:27Ronnie Karam: Tell me why, Hugo. He's like, well, I mean, hours were weird. And then the whole dress up thing. I mean, God, did you hear about how I grew up? It was horrible. And it just slipped. I forgot. Instagram wall. Instagram wall. Please, someone. Please, someone help me here. Please. Please let me talk about growing up in Port Chester, New York. So then Kerry is like, well, if something did happen, if a link did break and we ended up on those rocks down there, we ended up on another yacht and the investigation's coming and check the logbook, I'm the asshole. So I expect more than that from you, okay?

1:06:00Ronnie Karam: Yeah, big logbook moment. God, the season's almost over. They're really ratcheting it up. Really ratcheting it up now. Now, guys, tune in to find out who didn't sign into the logbook. So Hugo's like, well, fuck my life. I just wish I could get sucked straight into the ground right now. Did somebody say they wish they could get sucked? Okay, Deb, you know what? You need to go back to your drink too much. I got sucked abroad one time. All right, Deb, Deb, calm it down. Okay. So Hugo's like, oh, God, fuck me. So then Hugo's like, sorry, it won't happen again for sure. um yeah jen jen it's your boyfriend and i guess they like fraser now oh no it's kyle so kyle comes out but kyle's not allowed to fuck the guests which he has taken to me and he can't go within 30 feet of the guests like he's on some kind of a list and they're public schools so he's like standing all the way back to the deck he's like hello there it is like um hi kyle you want to come over here?

1:07:06Ronnie Karam: No, I'd love to, but I can't really. I've got things to do over here, but good to see you. You're looking good. I think you're looking good. You're pretty far away from me, but I think you're looking pretty good. God, my wiener's trying to get over there. He's trying to walk all the way over there. Thank God my wiener doesn't have legs. Yeah. I don't get the Kyle thing. I mean, he looks like he just woke up in a dumpster, but they're like, oh my God, future boyfriend over there, right? So then, um, Fraser checks in with Anthony and with everything going on for today and then Kerry is like, all right, I don't mind, guys.

1:07:39I don't mind if you keep your shirts off on the beach. I'm sure there'll be a request for it, so get those shirts off. And Dan was like, Frasier, these guests want body shots? If I just start spitting out the lime when they go to take it, I'm just necking them all. Do you think that's kosher? No. We haven't got lime.

1:07:56Ronnie Karam: We haven't got lime. By the way, I broke up with my boyfriend for you. So, I mean, body shot would be nice. I'm just putting that out there. waiting to cash in mine. Thank you. So now everybody goes to the picnic. They get some chicken and beef sliders. It's super exciting. And Anthony's starting to stress about dinner. Okay, so he's back at the galley. And he's like, okay, Rainbow, Rainbow, what is time for dinner? She's like, um, yeah, two, it's coming up. It's at eight. And he's like, literally impossible. Two hours to make eight-course dinner? So we got to change the plans or we do the last course?

1:08:31Ronnie Karam: I mean, at one point, I'm not magician rainbow okay at one point i mean we set up for success for dinner or we go down what would you like rainbow she's like yeah that's not really my decision so i'm gonna send a histrionic text to fraser about it okay i start to realize i'm supposed to do it cause dinner restriction plus fire and ice and we have to do firework right after that and timing situation again anthony against time this is the story of my life instagram wall the time i learned how to read the clock. It was a very exciting time for me. But also at the same time, the clock said, you're stupid.

1:09:02So I stopped reading the clock. Now it's me against time all the time. Wayne Ball. Wayne Ball.

1:09:08Ronnie Karam: I'm not Mary Poppins. What the fuck does that have to do? Mary Poppins. I love when Mary Poppins made that eight-course meal in like two seconds. She's like, okay, I can't make any decisions like that. I can't help you with this. I can't, Fraser, have to move his ass on the galley. So she's like, Fraser, you should come to galley. The chef is starting to lose it again. This is definitely a moment where you've got to think like, I mean, I guess they want to have the fireworks going off during dessert. But at this point, just say, you know what? The fireworks are just going to go off in between the courses and it's fine.

1:09:43And then the meal will continue because it's too much. It's too much. You should, you should be able to be given more time to do a proper eight course meal.

1:09:51Ronnie Karam: Yeah. Also, it's funny that people are still so impressed by fireworks. Yeah. Yeah. When did they just become boring? You know, I think fireworks kind of became boring when they became screensavers. I think that was it for fireworks. I like fireworks, but I don't love them. Like, I'm never sad when I miss the fireworks on July 4th. It's like, fine. I get it. Like, whatever. Yeah, like, how much can you see? This year I got to go up to the roof and I watched them because you could see them kind of all over the city. And I was like, wow, little fireworks. Well, I climbed up to the roof for this.

1:10:23Ronnie Karam: I guess I'll stay. Yep. Wait, look. Hold on. It's a firework. That was another. Fireworks. Fireworks are over. I'm sick of you, fireworks. Find some new tricks. Sorry, Katy Perry, but fireworks are done. So now it's time to go to Simpson Bay. They keep on going to so many different bays this episode. This bay is known for being really obnoxious, and you have to do a polygraph as soon as you arrive. So good luck with that, everyone. Enjoy the Simpson Bay.

1:10:59Ronnie Karam: um this bait thinks tuna fish is chicken um so then carrie's like all right all right hugo you go get up here it's a huge moment for you all right here's what we're gonna do we're gonna do the the dock thing we're gonna do the anchor thing all right do it do it you can do it you can do it two shekels two shekels you got it you got it two shekels five minutes we're almost gonna die the dolphin's about to crash into a person. Oh my God, the lady's about to climb a mountain about freedom. Everything is good enough. We're doing... You did it. Good job. You did it. Good job. Good job. All right. Great job.

1:11:34He pushed the button and the anchor went down. Congratulations. He's like, wow, that's great. So now it's 90 minutes until dinner and Fraser's like, hey, it's a babe. Have you got plans, babe? Rainbow's like, well, we'll see what comes. I've been putting up flyers all over St. Martin to see if anyone wants to go, you know, fist to fist in a small island somewhere. No takers just yet, but hoping for the best. Okay, well, we haven't got long, so whatever you plan to do after this charter, you know, no one really cares. So then Anthony is freaking out. He's like, do we know where the fuck Frasier is?

1:12:09We have eight-course dinner in an hour and a half. I need the instruction. I mean, I need to know what's going on because we are talking about the big night, right? Like, I mean, nothing is going, no one gives a fucking shit about what we're going to do here. I mean, I don't give a fucking shit, too. So I don't know. Where's the tea towel? I need to throw a tea towel at the refrigerator. Oh, this is, it's coming to that.

1:12:25Ronnie Karam: And he's doing this to Slade, and Slade's like, go for it. Explain yourself. Oh, well, I'm going to Slade anyway. Good luck. Good luck. Okay, good luck for the other one. She's like, she doesn't care. What do you not understand, Anthony? You have an eight-course meal that you're going to start serving at seven. Yeah. Are they not allowed to speak French to each other? I was actually frustrated that he had to speak. He was so angry right now, and you know he just wanted to have a big French rant. And I felt like he was forced to do this rant in English. I'm like, just speak in French to Soleil.

1:12:56And I've been waiting all season for it. They need to speak in French together more. Like, I need to hear the French. I need to hear, I'll read the subtitles. I don't care. Give us the French.

1:13:04Ronnie Karam: So Fraser finally comes down. And Anthony is like, bro, I'm not happy, bro. I'm not happy. Everybody is flying around. Why? It is supposed to be biggest night ever. We have dinner on an hour and a half. And it's fucking eight-course dinner. And everybody give a shit about nothing. And it's supposed to be right now. Are we supposed to be us all together? they're going to show all the unique experience what is your what do you what are you talking about make your food you're the only person in control of the food or are you bitching about the table are you bitching about their outfits shut up anthony cook your food yeah i'm starting to get the sense that like did he just not sit down and like write up a game plan last night to be like okay this is what i want to make these are the things like you know like he's he's losing his mind.

1:13:49I understand why he's losing his mind, but he's also losing his mind in a way where it seems like he doesn't even know what to do. It's like, why did you not sit down with a notepad and just come up with a game plan and come up with an idea of, like, cook this first and this, then this, then this. It feels like he's a little in the weeds.

1:14:03Ronnie Karam: Wasn't it the same day that he's like, I'll make pink things, and Fraser's like, we don't need to make pink things. What are you talking about? So I don't think he has a plan. And I think he's just causing drama so that if something goes wrong, he can be like, oh, because no one took seriously. you know and I was saying all day I want people to take seriously so yeah I don't know I don't know what's going on with him but he's losing his mind um I'm afraid he's like okay stop complaining let's just do this Jesus and now Solaine is talking to Kyle and she's like where do you sleep tonight and he's like where do you sleep tonight like in your bed and he's like oh yeah I mean usually on Saturday night I sleep in my bed but you know there's an invitation I wouldn't say no to it She's like, oh, yeah, you know, because she knows very impolite.

1:14:46So I don't really want to be impolite.

1:14:48Ronnie Karam: They basically want to have sex tonight. Yeah, they're doing their like awkward flirting. I wouldn't say no to an invitation. I think that the invitation is worth no. So then Fraser, you know, it's like dinner. The captain's going to join for dinner. 7.15 at the latest. But it kind of all relies on chef now. and he's under a lot of pressure. So, and now we see 30 minutes until dinner and Anthony's like, oh, I planned for my head. I want to make something unforgettable. Oh, I don't know if I could do plan. It's my last dinner. I have to live like a legend. So the theme today, ice fire. I got to match everything.

1:15:29Ronnie Karam: I got to come up with something crazy. I got to do nothing for nothing. I'm fucked. I'm fucked. I'm fucked. You're actually like considering that like the theme is fire and ice. The ice stuff means that you have the liberty to make a whole bunch of cold dishes, which you could have made the night before. Just going to put that out there. So Fraser is like, he's going to be in a state tonight. I wish we had more time. By the way, I've added in a second fireworks display that's going to go off at 7.30. So we really have to have that 8-course dinner done by then. Is that a problem? I'm not octopus.

1:15:58Ronnie Karam: I'm not fucking Mary Poplin. Fuck me. 7 o 'clock for fucking 8-course dinner. Go fuck yourself. You know what? There's no more fire. No more ice. I don't want to do goddamn thing. The fire and ice. I've loved the building. No more. Now you're all just getting a series of chicken McNuggets and various dipping sauces. Congratulations. Oh, Anthony. That's it. That's it. One episode left where Damo screws over Kyle and Selene screws over Kyle and Kyle maybe finds a reason to stick his wiener in one of the guests. Who knows? We'll see. Who knows? All I do know is that it's time to put this season out to pasture.

1:16:38I'm done with it. I can't do it anymore. It's been 15 episodes. Geez, I felt every single minute of it. So thanks everyone for being here. Season finale next week. Looking forward to it. And we'll catch you on the next episode. Bye everyone. Bye. Watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. It's always a party on Alison Block. Our way is the Amber way. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp. Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt.

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1:18:39Ronnie Karam: Can't have a meal without the Emily Sides. Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland. Let's go into the woods with Guy Tubbs. It's our queen, it's Queen Laifa. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. Hail the cork master, the master of the cork, Jennifer Corcoran. We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo. We love him madly, it's Kyle Podshadley. In the study with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock. G, it's Lisa H. We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Baron. She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy. Always killing it, it's Lo Alkalani. The incredible edible Matthews sisters.

1:19:20Ronnie Karam: She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose. There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud. Neat, it's Ronit Feldman. She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke. We cannot tell a lie, it's Sarah Talafson. Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony. Please don't stop at Soleil and Pop. Let's take off with Tam La Plain. It's always a good time when you're wasting time with Bravo. She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar. We love you guys. This episode is sponsored by McDonald's. I'm having my hot Caesar summer, Ronnie. Yes. Caesar sauce? I feel like we don't talk about Caesar sauce enough because it's so, so good.

1:20:00I love to dip everything into it. Have you ever dipped fries in Caesar sauce before?

1:20:04Ronnie Karam: I mean, I just have. Wow, it is delicious. Caesar sauce is like a Parmesan, garlicky blend with some lemon in it. And you can dip anything in there. One thing I have been known to do is to stop over at McDonald's and go to the drive-thru and get myself a Caesar snack wrap and just dip some fries in the Caesar sauce. Also, the crispy strips in the Caesar sauce. Honestly, try it. It's really good. Listen, I say if you put Caesar sauce on something, that automatically makes it better. Yes, that's really all you need is the Caesar sauce. I think I just want to have just a constant supply of Caesar sauce and put it on things at all times.

1:20:41Ronnie Karam: Yeah, I'm a straight up French fry and Caesar sauce kind of a boy. That's what I love. And that's how I'm going to go down. Right now at participating McD's, the$2.99 Caesar snack wrap is making me rethink my go-to order. Caesar sauce at participating McDonald's for a limited time. Prices and participation may vary. This message is brought to you by Cologuard. If you recorded songs off the radio for a mixtape, it might be time to screen for colon cancer. The Cologuard test is non-invasive, requires no special prep or time off, and you start screening right from your home. It's just three simple steps.

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