#3040 RHOM S7E20: Kneeful Things

0:21Hello and welcome to Watch What Crap Ends, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker. Joining me today is the glorious and handsome Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. Oh, hello, Ben. How are you? How wonderful to see you. Wonderful to see you, too. How are you doing on this fine Friday? Good. I'm excited. My niece is coming in town with my sister and they're taking me to see Shawn Mendes tonight. So I'm like fangirling and, you know, wondering how much of a creep I'm going to look like at this concert. You won't look like a creep at all, like Katarani, just like looking at Shawn Mendes and drooling.

1:05I mean, he is really hot. He is a hot, hot, hot young man. He's a handsome young man. I don't really know anything about him, but I'm very excited to go. Okay. You know what? I'm going to be with my niece, screaming little teenager. It's going to be fun The girls are coming in town. So I'm doing that. So I was vacuuming a lot. There's a giant fly in my office right now. It's as big as a flying dog. And so I'm waiting for it to land near me so I can get it. That's my life. That's what I'm doing. What's up with you? You need a Brooks Marks tennis racket thing. I am, you know, in the throes of wondering whether or not I poisoned myself, you know, which is a fairly standard state of mind for me.

1:44If you do this time. Okay, everyone. I'm bringing this to the podcast only because I couldn't find answers on the internet. So I'm now appealing to the masses. This is a very specific, did I poison myself edge case, but I would love to hear what people have to say about this. One of our listeners, Jennifer, she, I was roasting some vegetables last week and one of our listeners, Jennifer was like, Hey, in Turkey, we have these things called cosmetics that are these, you know what a cosmetic is? No, you talked about it. Yeah. Yeah. I talked about it, right? It's like a cage that you put stuff in.

2:19Yeah, it's like a grill pan that you put on your burner, on like a gas burner, and it can hold more vegetables, and you can roast them. You know, if you're roasting peppers or like an eggplant for baba ganoos, you can blacken the skin very nicely. So I bought one from Milk Street, and I was very excited, and I decided to use it last night. And my range has like four burners, but in the center, there's like a center burner that's crazy. It's a crazy burner. it's like a double ringed burner so there's actually two things to turn on and that's like i think it's good for like walks like i never use it unless i'm putting that walk down and going like crazy high and or if i'm charring vegetables so i put my cosmetic on the crazy double ring burner and i put my peppers on there and let me tell you something this cosmetic was crazy and like they started to blacken like that i was like this is a miracle pan i've never seen anything like this.

3:12This is so much faster already. And it was great. And it's a black, it's like a black steel pan and it's enameled though. And like, I noticed within like four minutes that some parts of it started to glow red, like glow red and orange. And I was like, oh, oh, that I was like, is that just part of the cosmetic experience? And then I started to think, oh, maybe it's about to melt. It's like molten metal and I have the things I'm about to eat, like directly touching it. So then I got scared and then I lowered the temperature, but I still kept doing it. But I was like committed to it. I was like, I'm not pulling, I'm not pulling the peppers.

3:49Yeah, I got this pan. I got this new pan from Milton. I got the pan. I'm seeing this all the way through. So then when I, when I eventually removed the peppers, I noticed that in the black charring areas, there were some areas that looked almost like blue, like a chemically blue. and I was like, did I just like, did like the enamel melt onto the peppers? Was this a chemical reaction? Is this like normal? I messaged Jennifer as she is now my queen of cosmetics. And she said, actually, that happens all the time when I just char like peppers on a grill, like it'd be black, but sometimes you even see like this kind of bluish thing.

4:25But I'm still like very concerned that I did something chemically to my peppers. and I want to know from the masses, will I be okay? Are you dying? Am I dying? I guess we'll know by the end of this episode if you're like bleeding from the eyes or something. You never know. It could be a good Halloween episode. We lose Ben during a Miami recap. I did cool down the cosmetic and it looks kind of weird now. I think it clearly is not meant for that high of a flame, which I feel like what sort of grill pan are you that you can't deal with any type of flame? but I think if you don't smell something bad then you're okay and I know people are going to bring carbon monoxide but whatever you can kind of smell carbon monoxide make an effort yeah so the pan looks kind of like weird now it doesn't have that nice clean like black sleek enameled look anymore but um I'll post pictures I would love to get um I'd love to get the advice of maybe am I dying or a smelter thank you come to our instagram and tell Ben whether or not he's dying.

5:28Okay, everybody? Well, if you want these recaps on videos, we are on Crappins On Demand. If you want our bonus episodes, this week was a Southern Charm trailer. Super fun. That's also on Patreon. And Mondays, we do Amazon Lives at 4 p.m. Pacific Time. And every other Monday that we're not doing that, we do Crappy Hour. So this coming Monday will be Crappy Hour. And that's going to be at 5 30 p.m. Pacific Time. You can find that for free on YouTube, Instagram, and our Patreon. Free all places. So join us for that. That's where we talk about Bravo Headlines and you guys come talk to us about whatever you want to talk about.

6:03Ask your questions and all that good stuff. And today is the end. It's a very sad day because it's the end of Miami Season 7. And it's been a great season. It's been a hilarious season. It's a season that is absolutely tanking in the ratings, which sucks. They're getting series low in their ratings. But that might just be overnights. That might just be overnights. That's what I read. I read ratings bravo.com. or at Ratings Bravo on Twitter. Overnights mean nothing. Overnights mean nothing. It's all about the live plus sevens. It's also engagement. They don't care about overnights. Let's praise.

6:39Let's be in a space of praise for Miami for a wonderful, wonderful season. Let's remind people that this is the best. I am shocked, though. I am shocked by the number of people who when I say, are you watching Miami? They'll say, oh, I haven't started that one. And I really mean to, or like, I'm a few episodes behind, which usually means you've watched one episode this season. When people say I'm a few episodes behind, that means they haven't watched anything or like one. I know that. Cause that's what I say when people ask me about things like, you know, like the other TV show, the bear, honestly, it is what I do.

7:14I'm like, I'm a few episodes behind. I've watched season one season two. Thank you. Yeah. But like, for real, I mean, it's shocking. It's shocking that people sleep on Miami. Like, it's crazy. It's the best. It's the best. It's the best one to sleep on because it's the bounciest. They've got the most figures out of any. It's the bounciest. All right. So here we are, season seven, episode 20, reunion part three. We pick up where we left off last week. Larza has just, we've seen a clip of Larza making a comment about Lisa in Milan because she's like, oh my God, like if your dad's like sick, like why are you even like in Milan?

7:59Like why are you like by your dad's side leg? Well, Gina from Provolone Cheese says, Larsa was harsh by saying you should have been in Milan with your sick father. Remember that? Well, you know what? Let me tell you something. I'm gonna get emotional. I get so emotional, baby. Okay, give me a fucking tissue. Give me a tissue. Okay, nobody knows what I had going on with my father and my history because I haven't talked about it and my dad would have wanted me to do that. He said, he would have said, Lisa, fly to Milan and walk in a shitty fashion brand show. Okay? And that's what he would have done.

8:35That's what he would have liked for me. My dad loved Zara. Lenny! So she's crying because everybody's piling on on her and nobody even asked her how she was doing with her father. And Kiki's like, I did. I did. And we're still like, well, I'm sure I ain't. Not a full-fledged cast member. Not a full-fledged cast member. Friend of is fine. Let me finish. Alexia, when your mother died, not only did I have empathy for you, but I wore a bright green dress for no good reason. And then after that, I had a whole party for you at my house that you weren't able to make. Because remember when they had like, apparently Lisa did have a nice celebration of life for Alexia's mom at her house.

9:18But remember before then, everyone showed up in like black at like some memorial thing and lisa showed up in bright green everyone's like lisa why you red dress in bright green lisa shows up in like a bikini and and heels you know uh and we see a clip of this party where marisol's like everyone needs to take a big sing for nancy these are our favorite things so they all take selfies with cigs or something and then um lisa's like yeah i've even made everyone wear your mom's red lipstick i mean no one's been that creepy since louis on real housewives of new jersey i did that for you i did it for you oh so we're comparing grief okay okay all right all right well no you're not comparing grief you're comparing the reaction to someone's parent dying you selfish ass yeah i think i think actually lisa does have a point which is like um like alexia when things like this happened to Alexia, she is justifiably given the space to mourn it and, and go back to it and use it to explain all her emotional reactions to things throughout the entire season.

10:24But with Lisa, they're like, get over it. But I also think the reason why they say that to Lisa is because Lisa has been kind of playing again, whether justifiably or not, she's been playing the divorce card for like a few years now. And I just think that people don't want to let her have cards anymore because she's, she's been able to see what you do with the cards. You're no longer playing cards. She's like at the casino. They've like, you've been counting the cards. You're out. Your divorce is annoying. So your dead dad is going to get in the backseat. Okay. I think that's kind of as that. Because they've had to like over index on sympathy for the divorce.

11:00And so now they just don't have capacity to like feel bad for her when she never even talked about her dad. I want to talk about how her dad had she had no relationship with her dad. And now suddenly they have to like make hold space for her now in a way like when i was like where did this come from i'm not saying that they're right in fact i think that like they may even be wrong but like i think that's why they're just kind of like okay too much lisa yeah i think she's saying listen you know you guys complain about me crying too much so i don't even cry and then now but now you're gonna make shitty comments about my dead dad and like me and my dead dad like what the fuck larsa and larsa's like yeah but like but we weren't in a really good place like and like i think that like i feel like you were like just like trying to make me feel bad for saying that yeah you should feel bad for saying that what the fuck is wrong with you what's wrong you see what you did there i wanted to make you feel bad you're piling on me you're piling yeah but like let's be honest we all thought that when larsa said that to lisa she's like well what are you doing here why'd you go back because you know she had a real voice she's like well why don't you go back why are you with your dad right now we all were kind of like yeah like why are you like all would you fly all the way to italy when you're if your dad is like on his deathbed you know it's it feels weird to be to use the my dad's on a deathbed card while you're on vacation you know i mean people process things in different ways you know people she may be having an avoidant moment i get that but like i think a lot of us were thinking what larson said she had major problems with her dad wasn't she hit that when she was really young and stuff like that i think that's her backstory yeah um so i don't think you have to go sit there for mean people like people who are mean to you and then later apologize personally right but especially saying like how could you say this to me laura so my dad is on like i'm dealing with a lot my dad is on a deathbed so she's like well then why are you like well you could still be dealing with someone you could still be sad about someone's death while you're on a runway show in milan what the hell like why is why do i have to choose a set to be sat on that's a fashion cries for no one i'm allowed to cry in milan i'll cry wherever i want to this is an internet ever since we have the internet we're in an international community now it's a global community i can cry with him on facetime fuck off i'm putting on this outfit and i'm walking for my instagram photos have you met kelly catrone and you're gonna say you're gonna cry during a fashion week no thank you sir that's not gonna work it's not gonna fly like i wrote you like a message like and i like asked you how you were doing like and she's like this is about my dad.

13:31Let me talk. Let me talk. Okay, but enough is enough. Because you've been talking. How much dead dad do we have to take today? This is nuts, Andy. If dead dads were tequila shots, we'd be on the floor. Okay? Because that's all we've been swallowing. Give me a break. I mean, Alexia saying enough is enough is wild. When Alexia stubs her toe and it's a telenovela for three years in a row. I know. It's just like a lot. I stopped my toe right in front of Frankie and he had to see it. It was just so embarrassing. And I was just like, Like, oh my God. Oh my God. Enough is enough. We're allowed to grieve.

14:08We're allowed to grieve. You got to grieve for it. You know, guess what? I was only allowed to grieve for a year during a divorce. And guess what? I'm still grieving. It's still going on. But you don't want me to talk about it. So I don't talk about it. Lenny. Lenny. And you know what? I keep it to myself. And people don't know what I'm doing. because nobody asks me questions anymore. And I just love Lisa because she's so Botox that even when she's like legit upset, her face looks so crazy. It looks like she's trying to squeeze out a twig. Like there's, I don't know what's happening, but she's like, yeah, she does this thing with her eyelids.

14:44It becomes like a cartoon fish. And she's like,

14:49Botox wasn't made for crying. I think Botox makes you look so nice in multiple ways. Like when you're laughing too hard or stuff like that, but crying now. No, it's just not good. Now, please don't, I don't want anyone to get confused by what I'm saying. I fully believe that Lisa has a right to mourn her dad and like she should be allowed to mourn her dad without like eyes being rolled on the show. I just think that she's, it's just also so funny when she's like, I was only allowed to mourn my divorce for a year. That's all I was allowed to. I was like, lady, you have been mourning your divorce on this show for like three or four years now, okay?

15:27like the way she acts, like she's been pent up in a little box. I'm like, every time you open your mouth, it's about your divorce, your divorce, or, and now it's your dad, but like, it's still going to go back to your divorce. Well, I mean, I just think she's fighting with people who are really insensitive monsters and she's not going to win by crying. Like they don't even care that you're crying. You know, she's sitting there like my dad died and Alexi is like, Oh yeah. You know what? But same though. Same though. I feel the same. Yeah. I feel the same. And that's the point I'm trying to make.

15:54It's like you crying. Like, I feel like crying right now. What about that? Okay. Okay, Alexia. You know, Jesus, why can't you just say, okay, sorry, we didn't mean to be insensitive. That's a strange concept. So easy. On this show. Sorry, I didn't mean to be insensitive. Well, I want to know what happened in the elevator in Sevilla because cameras were not there. And they've all been fired, by the way. Okay, they're all dead. So then we see a flashback of Larza telling Julia in the elevator that Jodi started texting her. And Julia's like, well, you're in the elevator and you talk to Lisa and you tell her about things that provoke her.

16:34And that's probably why she called Jodi. And so they're talking about that. And Andy's like, well, what happened? And Julia's like, Larza, to be honest, you snap. And you said something to Lisa again because you were feeling it. And Lisa replied, thank God the door opened and we walked out. and Jody started texting her again and again and he wouldn't stop. And Jody is in the dressing room just watching and he's reacting in some way, but it's very like Mona Lisa. I think we have to kind of project what sort of emotion it is because his face is fully frozen with Botox and he still is in the throes of Lockjaw.

17:07So he's like... Yeah, he's kind of shaking his head, but it looks like he's just sitting on a car dash going over bumps. He's just kind of like... Yeah.

17:20so wholeheartedly there's a big severity of this issue that she wants to skip over and only talk about how jody's texting her the insinuation of what jody was doing on or what jody was doing or on is the issue at hand and then we see a flashback to everyone looking at jody's picture with his eyes and it's like oh how big are his eyes at least it's like when i saw that footage i was disgusted Going in on Jody was so unwarranted. And then you chimed in and you chimed in and you chimed in. But about what? When you said how big were his eyes, how could you even say that? Well, in my culture, in my Russian culture, that's what we say.

18:01If somebody is as big, if somebody is angry, we say how big is their eyes? Oh, really? Very popular Russian proverb is how much cocaine in nose?

18:16I'm talking and Julie's like how big are your eyes DC's what do we say excuse me you insinuated that he was on something and Larissa's like yeah but like they'd like thought that like because like you were talking about like you see in your apartment that had nothing to do with me like like that I didn't have anything to do with that I don't have anything to do with air conditioning and so we see the clips of Jody being like want to come back to my bedroom I've got AC yeah we're going to do shots in AC in my bedroom. I'm like, oh yeah, where's your bedroom? Get that AC up my fucking nose. He's like, yeah, I want to drill some AC.

18:50Yeah, fucking. It was just air conditioning. No, I'm sorry. Just reading the dialogue back, no one ever talks about air conditioning in that way. We're going for a shot and some AC. People don't go for some AC. It's just such a strange way to say it. To go for some AC really sort of makes it seem like a distinct quantity of something. And people don't talk about air conditioning in that way. I'm sorry. It just doesn't make any sense. Here's my thing. People have a right to do coke in their bedroom if they want to. That's his birthday party. I mean, they're saying that it was so hot in the apartment and the AC was in a smaller room so they could cool down or whatever.

19:33So whatever. But I think they're allowed to go do coke in his party if they want to. And it's so hypocritical for everybody on this cast to be like, oh my god cocaine larsa you were with a coke head we just saw your boyfriend get arrested your fiance or whatever get arrested doing a mountain of coke during breakfast on a yacht so let's not act like you're some stranger to cocaine you're always all wiping your nose and got runny noses i'm looking at you mary saw and larsa so everybody acting and you've got cocaine cowgirl over there alexia you guys being judgmental about cocaine as miami denizens is hilarious and And also Jody's face always looks like a crazy cokehead's face.

20:11It's just how he was drawn. Yeah. Justice for cocaine users. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial.

20:24I don't think they're like in a tizzy about the cocaine. I think that what they don't like is Lisa trying to gaslight them and saying, oh, no, it wasn't cocaine at all. It was truly air conditioning because they all know what it was. We all know what it was. And Lisa would be like, it was air conditioning. And she's gone above and beyond. Well, it's an illegal substance. What is she supposed to come on and be like, yeah, my boyfriend's a raging cokehead. And he was doing coke all night. No, I think you just let it die on the vine. You let the audience be like, the audience like sort of laughs and gives each other annoying winks and jokes.

21:00And then you just sort of move on and like whatever. Everyone knows exactly what it is, et cetera. But Lisa's - I like Jody's answer. Because after all that happened, Jody came on Instagram or something and was like, what if I was doing cocaine? We live in Miami, everybody does cocaine. But it wasn't cocaine, it was air conditioning. That's a good answer, actually. Because it's sort of taking, it's like gives like a little like, you know, it sort of takes the teeth out of the accusation. But I think it's that like Lisa is so adamantly defending this air conditioning situation that they just don't want to deal with that bullshit.

21:36And Gertie's a good friend too, because she's like, yeah, they needed the air conditioning because they were cooking steak at the house and it was very, very hot. So. You know what? You need to say sorry, Larsa, because you fucked up. You know, I'm sorry for not unfollowing Marcus. My bad. I should have done that. I wish I did. But you have a lot of things that you should be saying sorry for. All right, well, what do you want to apologize for? Uh, well, where should we begin? I don't know. that's on you because you're the one who said she has a lot to apologize for. I was expecting to get this far in the conversation.

22:09I know all she had to say was what I just said, accusing my husband or my boyfriend of doing cocaine. But she just gets lost. She's like, wait, I got to name things? All right, hold on. Let me think of things. This is the part where Alexia interrupts me and I don't get to talk for the next 45 minutes. Oh, I have something to say. Me too. Me too. Yeah, that's how I felt too. I feel that way too And I kind of feel it in the bigger and brighter way You know what it is It hurt me and Jody's relationship We've had nights where I don't want to give you that much power But we have nights where we almost broke up over it Thank god We had cocaine To make it fun again Honestly Could you imagine if that happened Imagine Jody talking to his bros like a year later Sitting at the bar sad had tears in his beer.

22:57Like, hey, man, what's going on? He's like, the one that I love, she got away. What happened? Larza Pippen. Oh, man, sorry about that. Yeah. Larza Pippen accused my air conditioning of being on cocaine, bro. I had to break up. It was because of his reputation. That's why. That's why. It was his reputation. Yeah, because his reputation was on the line, you know, because of the problems. Wait, let me ask you a question. If you could apologize to Jodi backstage, would you do it? But yeah, but like, yeah, but like, like, look, I don't want to make like my friend upset anymore. Cause like, I feel like this is like an honor.

23:34I feel like like for far like too long, like I'm not going to apologize to Jodi. Like I'm not going to not apologize to Jodi to make my friend happy. But so like, I'm not going to not going to apologize. Not gonna. Does that mean I'm going to apologize and that I'm not going to apologize? Me too. Me too. That's how I feel too. I like this, bro. I like this. This is good. Let's get some cockies. I was just looking up Jody's job because I forgot what he actually does. I guess he's a, um, a tech entrepreneur. It looks like he has a job called postalize. Um, which I don't know what that is. Is that like a way to like revolutionary, like revolutionize, innovate like post-its or something like that.

24:13But it's, I'm like, he had his LinkedIn posting lies. That's kind of like housewives of bread and butter. So he fits right in, but I just like that. He's, he's basically a tech bro. it's an all oh yeah they have their app ai powered business easy divorce fun making divorce fun again introducing the world's first proactive relationship management i guess it's something with ai with with law firms whatever you're meaning to tell me that a tech bro essentially a tech bro entrepreneur in miami like his reputation is gonna be ruined because he was accused of doing coke in the bedroom yeah what a tech bro never a tech bro in miami it's reputation it's reputation nobody thinks tech bros do coke so now we talk about vacations and how lisa missed the plane and had to take a bus a train a taxi a subway a hike a bicycle every plane, train, and automobile possible to get to Sevilla.

25:18And how she was talking about, like, it's so difficult as an immigrant. No one understands what it's like when you don't know the language. And so Andy's like, babe, how long have you lived in Miami? And she's like, ah, 16 years, almost 17. He's like, and you don't know a lick of Spanish? She goes, yes, I do. Like, hold on. Hola. Yeah, Benito on Miami.

25:43Lisa, that's crazy. I mean, look, I get it. I mean, I've been in, well, I don't know. I mean, I've been in Los Angeles for like 24 years. And, you know, I haven't picked up that much Spanish, but I've tried. And like every now and then I hop on like Duolingo and I start doing Spanish lessons, etc. Like at least I attempt. Su camisa es azul. Su camisa es azul. Su camisa es azul. I've made a lot of proclamations about who has apples

26:15people don't realize this but it's like Salad everything is about manzanas tell me you haven't gotten past chapter A minus I have gotten they really need to change up Duolingo though you're right because everything is like the man is wearing a blue shirt and sally has an apple like i don't give a fuck about sally's apple tell sally to get a ding dong apples are no way to live and the way they say it to you as if they say it like they're like they're divulging a secret like sally has three apples and you're like okay like she likes yellow i'm like oh okay he doesn't like yellow i'm like oh okay fine all right relax i'm fine starting conflict and now there's like gossiping about like these children conflict between sally with an apple and the guy in a blue shirt yeah i definitely think i can like i can sort of like no i can't read spanish necessarily but i can sort of like buts my way through reading it but in terms of me even just now sitting here being like oh let me create i can't i honestly can't sit here and say create a spanish sentence for you like he the boy likes apples, I could read it and I could translate it, but I couldn't say it.

27:34I'm like confessing on my Spanish. Yeah, well, that's okay. I'm sorry, everyone. I can't articulate it. You're forgiven. All right. Any volunteers to teach Lisa some Spanish? And Kiki's like, I volunteer. Okay. I know how to say this. Dildo, dildo, dildo, dildo. Dildo, dildo. That's Spanish. No ponga to pinga on mi chocha. And it's like, okay, does that mean don't put your dick in my i love andy grilling lisa about not picking up a lick of spanish when andy has like clearly spent last night memorizing his like opening lines he's like hola mi amigos

28:16ladies yeah but it's funny because people only know spanish based on what they need it for right so like a lot of people will know it like to boss people around like if you work in you know kitchens and stuff like that where a lot of Spanish is spoken. You know how to be like, por favor, necesitas mas platos en la mesa 20 or whatever. So you know how to say things that you need to only to get by. And I love that Andy clearly doesn't know Spanish, but he knows all the dirty shit. He's like, oh, wait, you want to put your dick in my butt crack? Wait a second. You want to swallow my load? Sounds great, daddy.

28:51I have a nice reserve. He knows how to say hola, you know? He's like, oh. I can say, I I have a nice little reserve of Spanish from like 90s pop songs. Like that one song that was like, I got no tango dinero, cabaret, cabaret. So can you help me out? You're like using Macarena in any sentence that you can. Don't be so long Macarena. I'm so white. Everyone's like, oh my God, this guy again. So then we get to Kiki eating wacky things on trips. This year she nearly gagged on an oyster. Wasn't that hilarious? And she's like, well, I feel like if I wasn't going through celibacy, I would have been so used to it going down my throat.

29:34But at that moment, my throat was so dry, Andy. And Julia's like, oh, but oysters are so wonderful. It's my favorite thing. We know, Julia. I need to teach you a puppy. I give you a small what the book. Okay. All right. Well, that was not that interesting. So. Thanks to whoever put an oyster segment in here. Okay. Glad these are three episodes long still. All right. Well, the strips were not all champagne and jazzercise. Stephanie Julia fanned the flames between Alexia and you in Spain. Remember that when Julia did that? Let's look at a clip. And we're back. So, boy, that did not land, Julia. She's like, oh, I know.

30:13I know what these not lands. No, I'm talking about Alexia and Marisol making it on the plane and landing in Marbella. It did not land. They never made it, huh? That was a joke. And Stephanie's like, well, it's because I was getting to know you and we had a great time at dinner with Martina talking about how our family members won't speak to both of us. Like my sisters hate me. Your daughters hate you. I mean, that was great. Wait, I'm sorry. Who was I? Who was I dinner with? Oh, yeah. And your daughters hate you. You know, and that trip was not going to happen unless I did it. And for you to have just made it worse for Alexi and I by talking behind, you know, by tattletaling.

30:47I mean, that really was just. And she's like, you're absolutely right. I'm going to give it to you 100%. My comment was silly. you know sometimes they say like in russia brain fart this is what we do in my country you know it's a compliment when we tattletale on our friends in country with white eyes white eyes yeah it was a real brain fart it was you currying favor with a ladies you've been trying to get in with who by the way are gonna drop you like a bad habit the moment that's convenient for them so lisa's like can i ask you a question where was this energy from these two when they didn't come to Marbella, okay?

31:20Because remember, remember everyone was mad at me for being late. They didn't even go to Marbella. So, which I think is a fair point. I think we've been wondering why Julia was so chill with them being, like just not even going to the most important part of the vacation, but like getting so mad at Lisa for being late. And Julia's like, oh, because Speed Trip and Sevilla was for Alexia, but Marbella was for me. Don't you understand? Logic makes no sense, right? But that makes sense to me, right? So it was important for you and your two new besties were there for you. And she's like, you know what?

31:52I wanted to concentrate on myself for once. Me, Julia, who never concentrates on herself. Me, Julia, who just had an opera party slash foster care party. So I could sing the opera. This is the biggest bullshit from Julia. Well, some of the biggest bullshit. I mean, everything's bullshit these days from her. But like, if I remember correctly, she really got so mad at Lisa for being late because she was saying, she doesn't understand how important this trip is for me. You couldn't get on a plane in time for me. You couldn't do this for me. Like everything. And this was just about like, oh no, Lisa missed an afternoon of drinking cocktails at the Ramada Lobby Bar.

32:30But now like when it's actually fully going to Marbella, she's like, oh, it's okay. I wasn't focused on anyone else. I was just focused, me, on the two gays in Marbella. Like, this is bullshit. Just the idea that Julia, you know, never concentrates on herself is hilarious. So Marisol's like, well, I don't know why you're calling me your bestie. We're just getting to know each other. But I wanted, oh, thanks a lot. But I wanted to ask my friends to be godfather. And that was my point. I would want my friends to be there with me. Absolutely, I would want, but they were not. So what can you do? And Lisa's like, oh, but you got a lot of energy for me.

33:03I saw the footage. I personally think actually a bigger question is where, like, you nailed Gertie to her cross for not getting onto a Zoom in time. and yet these two ladies just full on skip out on what you call one of the most important days of your life. So I don't understand that. Is this where Stephanie yells? Where she's like, wait, wait, can I talk for a second? Yes, this is out of nowhere. She's like, she's silent. And then all of a sudden she acts like she's been talked over. Everything's like just typical banter. And then she's like, can I talk for a damn? Like, whoa, Stephanie. But I want to clear the air from this horrible misconception.

33:43Is it really that bad to fly on Shoma Air with the rules? Did you have fun? Or like, was it that crazy? Oh my God. It wasn't just your rules about not pooping on the plane. It was that you were threatening to leave half the cast off of the plane. Once you were already there, you little fucking, uh, what's the short person who gets mad? The short person who gets mad. Well, who just said Napoleon, you little freaking Napoleon. Hmm. Yeah. Who's the one who just said imp on Bravo? Oh, was it? It was Stacy. Stacy called, uh, Ashley and imp, which I thought was so funny. um i what was so funny is that that stephanie is like everyone shut up like she screams like she has this really salient point and then she's like can we all agree writing on show my air was pretty good it was fine right i was like that's really that's why you halted everyone to say that so uh yeah we see footage of them on the plane dancing and it was really great and marisol's like listen stephanie it wasn't about the rules when we sat down to do the plane layout and we're deciding, oh, we're going to put Kiki in this room far away from Adriana and all that stuff.

34:46You know, I started to feel like everyone's going to be in the store. It feels like solitary confinement. You're calling so many shots. I didn't like it. And she's like, well, have you been on a private jet because there's no solitary confinement in a private jet? Well, the way that you were drawing out that thing, it looked like you were shoving people in their own private rooms where they were not going to be talked to. You were the one who made the drawing. I think there's also an element of, sorry, I think there's also an element of, I think of Stephanie was 100 % on a power trip. We all agree.

35:15And I think there's also an element of like, not only was she on a power trip, she's in no position on this cast as a newbie to be on a power trip. Like if Alexia had done it, I think Marisol would have been like, this is a great plan. I mean, wasn't it just like a few episodes prior that they literally split up into two yachts, which is kind of not that different. Be like, okay, this person goes in this yacht. This person goes in this yacht. We gotta keep these people away from each other. so like they're not opposed to micromanaging a luxury travel experience yeah but i think true but i do think that they are different because stephanie is and was on a power trip but it was that she's a newbie on a power trip and they don't like yeah you're right person coming in and saying this is how it's going to be i think you're right i think marisol and alexia are like i'm not going to be bossed around by this newbie let's show her who's boss and not go on her stupid trip right Yeah, like the freshman telling the senior how to act.

36:11Yeah, and they're also wrong in that when Stephanie did that, they could have just said either right then and there when they were with Stephanie, listen, Stephanie, dividing people and threatening that they can't come back on the plane is just really uncomfortable. Like, I don't want to get stuck in Marbella. I don't want to get stuck in Marbella if you're going to kick half the people off the plane. Like, we'll just take a train or something because I don't even want to deal with this. Like, you're being annoying with your plane. But they don't. You know, they slink off and then they don't say anything.

36:37And then they try and power trip her by just not showing up and writing some snotty little text. And that's where Alexi and Marisol go wrong because they're obviously being mean girls. And then Marisol shows, even though Stephanie kind of deserved it, you know, but then Marisol shows up like, what? What did I do? I just didn't want to go. Instead of having the gonads to just say, I didn't like what you did and I didn't like your attitude. And that's why we weren't going to go. We thought you were being a little fucker. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that also like this is where Marisol gets the reputation of being a manipulator, because like you said, she should have said at that moment, hey, Mighty Mouse, this is all great, but this is just not the way we should really be conducting it.

37:12Let's just all go have a good time. Let's not worry about it. We'll keep each other in check. This is not the way we act as a friend group. But by her just nodding and then the next just like being non-confrontational and saying, we're not going to go. And then it is a little bit of a power, like a power play by her and Alexia. And that is inherently a manipulation. If you are not participating in order to sort of elevate yourself or to create separation between you and someone you think is acting crazy. And now there is a narrative that Stephanie was being crazy with the plane. you've now manipulated a situation whether it was like super intentional or not that is what you've done and it gets worse because stephanie's like well it also hurt me that from what they said you tried to convince everyone not to go she's like no no no and adrian was like yes yes she's like no there were only three of us together and gertie's like such a liar she is such a liar and so alexia's like well we said maybe we shouldn't go on your plane under that circumstance but we would still want to be there for Julia.

38:18So we were going to take a train to Marbella. That's what, that's what it was. That's what it was. We were just going to take a train. So it wasn't personal. It wasn't personal to get trains. Then why didn't you take a train? Especially if you're saying so much that like Marisol or Marisol, Marisol made it sound like they decided to hold back because Alexia needed like a private day. If you're on a train, you're going to have a lot of time to chill out and talk and have a private time. So that's kind of bullshit too. Like you don't say you were going to take a train and then you don't even take the train.

38:45If you were going to take the train, and you would have taken the train. Well, and the point was you guys just didn't communicate with her at all. Instead, you just, like, gave her the silent treatment and didn't show up and sent her some little shitty text, like, right at the last second, you know? Yeah. They're jerks. So, and Stephanie kind of deserved it because she was being a jerk. Like, I would have been the Alexia and Marisol in that position, but I would have said, you're being mean, and I don't want to go on your stupid plane if you're going to, like, you know, make me feel bad about it.

39:11Commercials. Here comes one right now.

39:19and he brings it back around to stephanie calling marisol and alexia twins and so he has this adorable segment where he's like i'm going to ask you questions and see if you answer like twins still i hate so they do that and uh so they do that is kiki's dad hot or not they're hot does jody have furby eyes and everyone just kind of get everybody just kind of cringes because it's It's just like, Lisa's just crying that you guys are making fun of her. This is so Andy. She's like, please stop bringing Jodi into it. He's like, does Jodi have furby eyes? Yes or no? Because he's a gigantic coke head. Yes or no?

39:57They're too nice to say anything to say yes. They're like, all right, is Stephanie spying on her parents? Creepy or cool? And they're like, what are you even talking about? It's like, oh, it's a reference to like one passing comment in a confessional from earlier in the season. in and so we had to show it and Stephanie's like oh my god I didn't spy I just set up their cameras this is outrageous oh my god I'm like America's favorite right now so yes they're twins it's official they're twins so um all right okay I want to move on to cake gate Kiki the equation you wrote on the cake was 32 times 2 minus 5 equals 59 Larsa uh you can come back to us she gets a little confused when math gets involved okay all right welcome back Larsa sorry that was scary like did you know how that was gonna land with her calling adriana old and kiki's like well now that i look back at it it does look mean and i heard ratchet in that moment okay and my instant pushback was you're too old to be talking like that because i'm the type that i'll just hit you where it hurt but to be honest it was not coming from malicious place blah blah blah and so Oh my God, do you think it's easy to age?

41:07Oh my God. You're talking to a real Housewives cast and a model. Of course she knows how hard it is to age. Yeah, this is the wrong audience, Adriana. Especially when you were like aging like magnificently and you're going to be like, oh, do you know how hard it is? I mean, this is a lady who is literally pushing 60. She is going to be turning 60 and she looks like fantastic. You're a stem cell in a wig. You look amazing. What are you talking about? Sandy's like, well, does this, does your opinion change when you see that Kiki had no ill intentions? She goes, but it was hurtful nevertheless, because, you know, at first I made it very clear, Gertie had even months before even offered to throw me a birthday party, and I never want a birthday party.

41:49I never celebrate my birthday, Andy, because I don't want to feel like that. I don't want to feel like someone you have to just buy a coffee machine for, you know? And I literally, the last party I had, I was 15, it was my quinceanera. Oh, gosh. I don't believe that whatsoever. In fact, I'm sure we could probably find some evidence of her having birthday parties over the past, you know, 40 something years. I just think it's funny thinking of her like at 16 being like, no, I don't want a birthday party. Please, please. I'm being 16. Just kill me now. Oh, my God. Are you fucking kidding me right now?

42:26She's talking about old age. you know like she called me an old whore and I have old lady knees she did that to me and we see that yacht trip where it was basically an hour of Adriana being like old whore knees wrinkly old knees stupid knees knees of an old crone maybe you should do something about your skinny knees you old whore with your wrinkly knees still I still yell that at Bueller when he's like taking too long to pee or something so Andy's like okay Well, given how sensitive you are about age, aging, you know, the word old, you know, getting crow's feet, waddles, et cetera. It's like, please, Andy, no more.

43:08Like, okay, well, do you think it's okay to come to come with Marisol about her old wrinkled knees? Can we get a close up of Marisol's knees? Right. The camera just closes up on Marisol's knees and just stays there and keeps cutting back to them, which is hilarious. Which he's showing off tonight. Do you think that's hypocritical? Another shot of the knees. Can we draw some eyes on the knees and maybe a frowny face? America, in case you're looking, that is not the Game of Thrones map. Those are Varico's veins on her knees. All right. So Adriana's like, well, the reason why I said it was just it was my intention to hurt her.

43:46And I love how when Kiki says, you know, I only called you old because I knew I wanted to hurt you. Like, I want to say the worst thing to hurt you. And Adriana's like, but it was hurtful. That was still so rude of you. But then when Adriana is called out for calling Marisol old, she's like, well, I wanted to hurt her. So I don't see what's wrong with it. Adriana's excuse is so funny. She's like, yeah, well, it was hurtful because it was supposed to be hurtful. That was the intention. She's like, I was removing myself from your presence. Well, it's not easy. You should know that. You should be a little more sensitive about it, about my age.

44:21Marisol's like, well, you didn't make it easy for me. I'm going to have surgery on my knees, literal surgery on my knees because you made me feel so bad about it. Can we get a close-up of my knees? Andy's like, can we get a close-up of that baseball glove that looks like it's been left out in acid rain? Marisol's knees. Okay. Hey, can we get a close-up of that conical Sharpay dog right there on the set? Oh, that's her knees. Never mind. I'm sorry. Can we get a close-up of this papier-mâché balloon? Oh, I'm sorry. That was Marisol's knees. Right. All right, Andy. Hey, can we get a close-up of that dried-up riverbed that sometimes fills up with flash floods?

44:57Oh, it's Marisol's knees. Sorry about that.

45:03And she's like, wait, wait, wait. Kiki's like, wait, wait, wait. Marisol said she's going to have knee surgery. She said. She said that. Yeah, I'm going to have knee procedure because I just feel so uncomfortable. Literally, the rest of the season, I wore pantyhose. Well, you shouldn't. And Andy's like, well, what procedure are you doing on your knees? Well, it's called Renuvion, and it's going to help me get knees. Because I'm really self-conscious about the wrinkles on my knees. Now, there's nothing wrong with your knees. Nothing at all. Nothing wrong. As we say in Russia, why are your knees so smooth?

45:37That is a great compliment. Why are your knees open so wide? This is what we say in Russia. And I love that she's plugging Renuvion, because she actually did go get that on her Instagram, you know, so she's getting like the deal, the free deal or whatever. Well, probably Renuvian probably reached out to Marisol and was like, hey, we'll give you a free knee thing if you want. She's like, sure, I'll do it. And now she's probably saying like, now I feel so self-conscious about my knees. I actually cannot believe that Marisol felt self-conscious after Adriana about her knees. I think that she just got this deal and now she's milking it.

46:14And she's like, well, I am doing my knees, So I might as well use that and get some sympathy for it. Hmm. Looks interesting. A thin probe is inserted under the skin. RF energy and helium plasma are released, creating a controlled heat that contracts the collagen fibers in the skin. I'm in. Let's do it. Where can you do it on me? Just pick a spot. Maybe the back of my arm, like the back of my elbows or whatever. So now they go on. I guess I wouldn't be the back of my elbows. That would just be my elbows. Yeah, my weenus. I want to, I want weenus talks. Hey, what's wrong with your wrist? You know what?

46:50This is so embarrassing. I went to the gym on Sunday and I literally picked up a 20 pound weight, which is like, not like, this is not like bodybuilder stuff. And my wrist was like, no thanks. And it like, I basically strained my wrists and now it's like aching and I have to wear a splint. And it's annoying because I was like all into going to the gym this month and now I can't even. Well, I don't want to scare you, but I'm looking up an article and it says, um, if you eat, um, food that has been over charred and turns blue, it weakens your bones. Oh no. You could be, you would think it'd be the opposite.

47:28That's like, oh, well I got some, I got some enamel in me now. This wrist should be strengthening up, but instead it's. You're going to be cooking. You're going to be cooking vegetables in your wrist. Yeah. I'm sorry. Dom said I look like a lady named Dawn who's like working like the secretary being like, hey, I got my couple tunnel. It's typing. It's typing. It'll do it to you every time. Mr. Mushnick, you got to call it line one. I can't answer. I got the couple. So they're all talking about how her knees are amazing and we keep getting close ups of her knees and stuff. So now we go on break.

48:02Some people go pee pee. Stephanie comes up to Alexia and she's like, do you like, did you like my Rottweiler prop? Wasn't that funny? I was so proud of it. you're hilarious I wasn't watching I fast forward your scenes so Basky comes by to say hi to Adriana and it's cute and everything and then Jodie and Lisa are sitting and Jodie's like you're killing it out there you're doing a great job you're absolutely killing it I don't know what you said but I just really wanted Lossa to own it and retract the accusations that were cast against you because this is her fault you're like a business man so Larsa comes in hey Jodie how are you can I sit like can I sit x y and z thanks like I'm gonna sit like okay guys like you know Jodi I know like you don't know like my history with like Lisa like and we've been like such good friends like and like I've gone through so much together like for instance there was the time like where I like listened to her for like three years straight about like her divorce like and then there was like also the time where she didn't like care about me like and I just have been like a great friend to her like it's just gone so south and I just felt like you know what I'm saying it's just like it's been really tough for me like so I just want to say that I'm like Like, really the victim in this, like, and if you want to apologize to me, like, that'd be great, like.

49:12Yeah, but that was a lot for him. He didn't want to be part of a circus. Yeah, but, like, Lisa, like, why didn't you call me then, like? Because we were, what do you mean? But, like, if you called me, like, I would always, like, take your call, like, I was, like, very hurt, like. Yeah, but, like, maybe you'd need, like, another day without any of this pressure that comes with reunions to, like, talk, okay? But the point is, Jodi, we're just having to be dragged through this situation. It was so bad. Jodi's like, uh-huh, uh-huh, yeah. No, it wasn't. But I just, like, wanted to say, like, I'm sorry, like, because, like, I wasn't trying to bring you into it when I was, like, Jody's on Coke.

49:44Or, like, you know, Jody's following Marcus still. And, like, Jody would be nothing without, like, Marcus-like and, like, Jody's a climber-like. Like, I didn't mean that in an offensive way, like. So, like, I hope that you understand that it's all Lisa's fault-like. And he's like, uh-huh, okay. Like, thank you. Yeah. And you're saying that. Yeah, yeah. Well, like, I don't want you guys to, like, ever be, like, you know, stuff, okay? because it's just like it almost broke us up. You know, the last time I saw Arcus was like a year ago, and I was like, hey, Arcus, why don't we hang out more? What was that?

50:16Nothing, nothing. Don't worry about it. Listen, we don't want to be a part of it, okay? Everything's good. All right, well, okay, good. Because I apologize. I don't want to fight with you. I don't want to fight with you. I love you. I love you. Yeah, yeah. We like, like, love, love, love, yeah. Do you have like an EAC like? So they hug, and then Lisa's like, your boobs are in the way. so now it's time to go back to the set and Mary Sol's got her handy prop there she's like yeah no I'm bringing my own cocky so Larza goes to set and she's like can we have some like tissue like and Andy gives her some and she's like oh my god these are like the best like tissues I've ever like had like amazingly soft like Andy like well yeah nothing but the best for Miami well look hey here's a tissue one for Sue Hermana.

51:06That's Spanish, Lisa. Okay, so we're back. Real Housewives of Miami, part 37. Lisa, Larsa, it seems like something positive has happened. Yeah, we had a nice talk. We feel good right now. So good. You don't know how much that meant to me. Right, Larsa? She's like, yeah. Yeah, we had a good, like, I'd like hug Jodi, like, yeah, let's get my nose running, like, could you give me another tissue, like? We had this thing where I look at her and she looks at me and starts laughing and then talking really fast and her eyes open up really big. Oh, so you're angry at each other. Watch your mouth. Watch your goddamn mouth.

51:47All right. Well, let's talk about, let's talk to Gertie about her post-cancer life. Yes, Gertie. So now we see a montage of Gertie's storyline and her therapy and all of that really good stuff. And he's like, okay, well, first, give us the latest health update so gertie gets very emotional and she says she's getting her groove back and um she decided not to get that reconstructive surgery she said enough was enough and she's thankful just be thankful for what you have and you know and you know then we see russell it always cuts to russell like smiling and nodding like that's my girl in the back and um she talks about her therapy and how she talks about that the the story of again of how she came to america and then was essentially kind of abandoned while her family went back to, her parents went back to try to like bring the rest of the family over and how it gave her lots of like abandonment issues.

52:41And so he's like, well, do you think there's a connection with the feeling of being abandoned as a child and what happened with Julia? What do you mean? Well, you know, like being abandoned. But what do you mean? Like as a friend from Julia, Julia abandoning you basically. She's like, oh, oh, okay. Well, not, that's maybe abandoned. It's not the right word, but like degrading. that's how it felt degrading you know because like i like the symbolic gesture of like you know this is like it's it's traumatic it was very traumatic andy it was traumatic it's like i'm sorry gardy again i made you feel this way it was not intended you know i lost my cool and i'm so sorry i made you feel that way and brought you back the pain the pain you felt as a child it's like thank you thank you thank you you just don't understand that when i was a child i was invited onto a celebrity cruise and I was not invited into the main room.

53:30So it brought back a lot to me. I remember walking into that school and there was a lunch lady who looked like Captain Sandy in polyester capri pants. And she would not let me have a sloppy joe like everybody else's sloppy joe. And so when I was kicked out of Captain Sandy's, okay, okay. Hey, that was actually me. Yeah. Before I was a captain, I hit some rough times. Yeah. That was back before I found the miracle of yabbing you know that's what back then i said i don't want any more sloppy joes i want clean joes i'll tell you what i don't miss the hairnets but i do miss uh refusing to give little girls i don't like sloppy joes so uh so her uh her wife uh bb baby captain sandy's wife whatever her name is baby baby you're so cute even like in a sexy way yeah leah leah posted on instagram someone asked her like what the hell was this why didn't captain why didn't you guys let uh gertie sit at your table and she's like maybe this is so ridiculous maybe because like julia wasn't even at our table she was at another table we were at a table with family and friends so i don't even know what julia is talking about because she wasn't at our table was this wasn't a captain sandy event it was yeah it was like some captain sandy event on the boat but uh julia did have tickets to come with martina but um it wasn't at captain sandy's table julie is making it sound like there was only so much room at captain sandy's table you know and that's why they didn't have martina and then when they asked sandy about it on watch what happens she's like oh this situation's just so silly you know like i mean basically i mean there were only a certain number of places at the table but you know the way i am is that anybody can just pull up a chair at a table.

55:21Like she avoided the question instead of just being like, well, she wasn't Martina. So we said no, you know, which is probably the truth. Yeah. I would have liked actually Andy to have gotten a little bit further to the bottom of this logistical thing with the, with the boat on this reunion. It sort of didn't get brought up at all. Really. I mean, I know the first episode of the reunion, there was a lot of Julia and Gertie stuff and you know, it's a little, it's when, when Gertie gets really upset, she, she really can, she's like Angie K like and Lisa Barlow, they just start like sort of like word vomiting and you kind of like can no longer like really have good questioning i guess you could say but i still would have liked andy to have been like can we just get to the bottom of what this cruise was what happened what were the logistics can you paint the picture because nothing really makes sense to the audience yeah what's the point of bringing it up if you're not going to get into it you know it's a reunion come on so um now we talk about julia's kids and so we get wacky scenes of christmas pictures and stuff and then andy's like so how are the boys and she's like they're at home now with martina which isn't really answering the question how old are they they are four to whatever they're doing fine they're great so she talks about her daughters and it happened so fast that they didn't get to talk to the daughters about it and Andy's like so they felt replaced and she's like well in the beginning probably also because I was calling the boys by their names because you know I was looking at the boys as replacements for my daughters but I didn't want them to feel replaced he's like okay daughters did not like that we named the boys new Vika and new Emma but since that was point of contention we changed their names which i thought was very nice of us and she's like you know teenagers but you know they know i want to have a big family and so vika has met the boys emma has not but they facetimed so um has she come around and she's like oh yes yes yes yes you know she's younger uh emma's younger so it's harder with her okay well papa from can you hear me says julia i have so much respect for you adopting these boys but you and martina are older have you talked to your girls about raising the boys and i think that question was probably rephrased to be nicer because i think it should have been phrased like you know you all don't have much time left and you're forcing these kids your your kids into raising these new kids after you die right right oh you know we did and you know we are family and the girls will be there.

58:01They're their brothers, so that goes without saying. And, you know, the daughter's like, uh, hello, we gallivant around Europe now. Um, we are not stopping everything to go to Florida to raise two children that just suddenly dropped into our lives that we now have to call our brothers. Yeah. Yeah, until they're like, no, they're gonna love it. Nope. So, uh, Marisol, uh, rumor is you're looking to sell Mama Elsa's house which i don't think anybody cares about except it's a chance to get in a mama elsa clip which is so good mama elsa just walking around the house with her giant fan going lonely again in this lonely house without family without anything all on my own talking to nobody about nothing wow well i know marisol you're in communication with maris with mama elsa What does she think about you saw your place?

58:57Well, I don't think she's really attached. And Stephanie said, wait, wait, wait, wait. What do you mean you're in communication? Wait a second. You can talk to your dead mom, but I can't even talk to my twin sisters? Like, this isn't even right. How is a dead person willing to speak to you more than the living people are willing to speak to me? This is crazy. Well, Riley from not Candy Burris' house says, Marisol, I know you wished your mom could have been there to see you marry Steve. You know that like Elsa's like, oh, I saw it from heaven and believe me, I fell asleep five times. So what do you think that Marisol would have said in her mother of the bride speech?

59:38She said, oh gosh, you would love Steve. That's not the answer. The answer is what would she say in her speech? And I think it would go something like, oh, Marisol, find somebody else to marry her. I don't know how she did it, but she did it. To me, she is like toast without butter. But some men still will eat her anyway. Because men, they eat. Speaking of, is it time for dinner? Well, she was a blushing bride for the third time. And even though Marisol claims she has a lovely colon, some kind of think she's an a-hole. Ha! Ha! Ha! So Marisol montage of Marisol being, you know, getting married, but then also being shady.

1:00:23So Andy is like, well, let's add to the pile on. Recently on her podcast, Dr. Nicole accused an unnamed friend of, that's you Marisol, of hiring a private investigator to dig up information on her. What's your response? Well, prove it, right? That makes you sound innocent. Prove it. That's what I say. Prove it. No, no denials. But didn't Marisol admit to doing this in a previous reunion? Yeah, I hired someone. They were at the mall. They tracked them. Did she admit to doing that? Maybe she did. I think that was in our head. I think that was a made-up thing, that we made up a restaurant in a mall that he was following her at.

1:00:58I think. I don't even know half the shit that we make up and what's real. Yeah. I don't know. So he's like, well, why do you think Nicole's bringing it up now? She's like, listeners. She's desperate. Desperate for listeners. And Alexi's like, yeah, it doesn't make any sense to bring it up now. And Marisol goes, prove it or we're going to court. Oh, yeah. I would love to see Discovery. Please do. Sue. Sue, Sue, Sue, Sue. Yeah, seriously. Stephanie, you originally believed that Alexia influenced Marisol's opinion, and then after your talk with Alexia on the spot, your opinion flipped. So who do you think manipulates who in this Alexia Marisol dynamic?

1:01:37Well, as much as I love you, as much as I love Shoma Bazaar, you've actually hurt my feelings, and I haven't really talked to you about that, but I think Larsa went and told you, but it hurt my feelings since I've been on the show. It's been very hard for me to deal with public backlash, and it's been really hard for me. And like, you know who managed to send me every single terrible article about me? Was it your twin sister? No, actually, she didn't even do that. It was Marisol. Marisol did that. You didn't answer the question, though, which was, who do you think manipulates who in the Alexa Marisol dynamic?

1:02:08I like that no one even listens to the questions anymore. It's just like, okay, it's my chance to yell at her. So Marisol's like, well, she told me you didn't like it. I mean, why don't you tell me you didn't like it? I would want to know this. I would want to know this is out there. So I'm just going to tell you that everyone hates you when I find out. Good morning. People still hate you. I mean, I was considering it a favor. You should have just told me. Marisol sending shitty headlines to Stephanie is so hilariously nasty. I mean, like, and then she acts like, no, I'm just trying to help her.

1:02:44What an underminer. Wow. Talk about toxicity. Yeah. oh, this is manipulation. That's manipulation right there. This is slander. And Stephanie's like, everyone tags me every day. I go to bed. This is thinking the worst idea of my life. You know, I'm getting counted by everybody, the press. Everyone's making fun of me. Well, I wish you would have told me that. I mean, I knew everybody was making fun of you because I was sending you the headlines. Those headlines were good, too. Those are really good. Listen, you know what? You try and give someone a good smile every day and look at the thanks they give you.

1:03:17Look at the thanks. Can I say something? Like, can I say something? Like, honestly, I think I know what it is like. So like Marisa, I thought like when you were going to come on into the friend group that like you and her and I and Alexia, we're all going to become really close. Like you're going to be like the rich one. And then I'd be the one with the hot boyfriends. And then they'd be like our two old aunts. And then like, is there anyone else in our group? I think that's just it. And we just be like the best. But then like you were like friends with like the not cool people. And that was like really hurtful for her.

1:03:43So I think that's like what happened. like i love that larsa is basically saying marisol wanted you as her friend and when you were friends with everybody she decided to turn against you just basically what larsa just said yeah and marisol's like yeah but i encouraged you to be friends with everybody she goes you did you know what and you guys don't believe me but my lunch with adriana she told me you got to get to know everybody and she goes well i said the same thing no you said the same thing it's just like i truly think that you got yeah but like she felt hurt like because she thought your relationship was going to be like solid like and you know what can we get a close-up of Marisol's knees because this is like a center part okay I think your circle is like very small and people don't know how sensitive you are you know what I mean look her knees are green why are your knees crying your knees look very upset like oh my god it's like that commercial for like don't litter your knees are crying so Andy and he's like so do you think Marisol is a safe space and Stephanie's like I think that like Marisol gave me absolutely good advice at the time on that on that Virgin voyages and she said and i think it was great advice which is like there's no safe space to talk to anything about anyone you know or anybody about anything all right well there's no safe spaces at the final party as marisol dropped a bombshell and we see a flashback to marisol claiming that she told adriana to to say wretched instead of ratchet as the reason like she came up with this excuse and marisol's like yeah i came up with it wretched yeah that was my big thing and uh adriana's like no wretched that's the word i use it was the context right i mean that's what i said that's what i meant ratchet w-r-e-t-c ratchet that's what i said oh god no we need to call kiki ratchet or ratchet ratchet that's what but ratchet or wretched ratchet and we see the clip again she clearly says ratchet ratchet she said ratchet she does not say rachet something close to it it's ratchet it's blatantly ratchet she knows what she said she's a smart lady she brags this is a lady who in another flashback we just saw her say in a flashback on the yachts was saying like she's doing this so that way it doesn't absolve her of yada yada she's using words like absolve she's bragging about going to harvard she knows the difference she knows the word wretched she knows how to say the word wretched she says the word wretched multiple times she said ratchet at that moment yeah and kiki is like but whether it was ratchet or wretched whatever it was i don't care and um alexi's like yeah you know what kiki doesn't care kiki doesn't care she said it right now she doesn't care so um adriana insists that she's not lying and everything and they all start talking over each other and gertie's like wretched is such a weird word to use and so he goes this is why everyone said this is what everyone sounds like a bunch of a bunch of barking dogs am i right remember should i get my prop out that was such a good problem we all like my prop right but why are you calling her and i had your back you know we don't need to argue about this because the definition and what she used clearly was not what kiki was doing she wasn't ratchet she was miserable all day so you know let's talk about the actual day she was miserable which would mean wretched right and adriana's like yes the context and so kiki says look the her question with ratchet is whether or not adriana actually used that word she doesn't think she's racist but her question is even if people take it that way she doesn't care because she knows who she is as a person that said you've been fighting with marisol since the roman empire which is funny and you never say ratchet to her because it's like another way of calling her old right you've been fighting with mary saw since the roman empire and you never say ratchet to her you never say to julia you never say ratchet to any of them so why would you say it to me why only me so right yeah she's like i think she's saying i don't think you're racist but i think you're problematic like and yeah there's something because all at the context of that entire conversation was that like lisa i'm sorry uh adriana accidentally outed this a moment with lisa unfollowing marcus and kiki said like why are you doing that you weren't supposed to do that adriana and she'll stop being she's basically saying whether you call me ratchet or wretched it was undeserved hostility aimed towards me and i don't know why it came towards me so um oh i thought she was saying the word right like you said ratchet you're calling the black woman ratchet but you've never called anybody else that word so why are you calling well there's that too i mean it's all that so andy's like so who deserves more of the criticism and mary's soul is like oh probably me it's my fault everything in my thing ass and kiki's like well look for two people to be and andy's like so are you mad at marisol for giving her a different word to you or an excuse or whatever and she's like well yeah because i'm supposed to be friends with her and then she's going behind my back to help adriana who's the biggest enemy and adriana's like bingo kiki says you know i find them at that point both to be backstabbing.

1:08:47Yeah. And so Adriana's like, see, you were trying, Marisol, you were trying to have something hanging over my head. You're trying to have wrinkly knees over my head. And that's what you were trying to do to manipulate the situation like you always do. Well, I want you to lay off of me. Okay, I'm poor Marisol. I'm just getting beat up by Adriana. Okay. Well, do you feel like you owe anyone an apology? Well, I didn't even take Keeks into consideration. So Keeks, I guess I apologize. I'm sorry about that. I didn't think it would affect you. And I just made a deal to let Adriana off the hook and make you seem like a crazy person who's using the race card.

1:09:24Sorry, didn't even think about that. Whoops. Yeah, exactly. Well said. And Adriana's like, oh, poor you, Mary Soul. She goes, yeah, I was just thinking about myself and not having any more issues with you, crazy person. Oh, crocodile tears coming out of you like a faucet, like a faucet. You know where it could use some moisture? Your knees. Put some crocodile tears on your knees. Get close up of the knees. Get that Luberderm crocodile in there. Let it cry on your knees. So now we move on. I really wish we hadn't moved on. I wish that they had just gotten Adriana to admit it. But I don't know how you get her to admit it.

1:09:58I think Kiki said what she said pretty well. But it just seems annoying because she did say ratchet. I wish she had just said, yes, I said ratchet. I wasn't aware that it was that bad to say. I just heard it in slang and I said it or something. but just saying like I didn't say it I meant wretched the whole time I ain't buying it yeah no one's buying that one so we're back for the final moments of season 7 it's also the final moments for Marisol's knees so in a season that had a lot of strong personalities clashing and a lot of wrinkles forming on that kneecap I want to see if we can actually end on a positive note but Julia that's not an actual musical note so please close your mouth I know you're about to try to belt one out So Stephanie says it's, you know, the best experience of her life.

1:10:44She's got true sisters now. And then Andy compliments Lisa on her growth. And she's like, thank you. Thank you. I've grown tremendously as a mother, as a person, as a friend. I'm taking accountability. I've been on time a few times. I mean, come on. I'm basically a good person now. And Stephanie's like, do you think that means I'm the lucky token? All right. And Gertie, green, what about you? Well, you know, I'm so glad you asked me this because I'm doing amazing. And hold on, let me get this book out from beneath this pillow to show how I've had such a good season. Here is a new book that I'm holding.

1:11:20And you're going to plug your book now? Of course I am, because it's all about coming full circle. It's about trauma to text messages on screens. Oh, I'm sorry. It's called Trauma to Trophies. We changed the name. Sorry. Because everything that happened here, I'm using it to fuel and empower me. So yes, from Trauma to Trophies, the memoir. And Mary's like, good name, good name. Adriana, what are you going to be taking back for the season? She's like, well, people are only up to the things that are right or wrong, but also because I felt that this morning the little note you had in your mirrors was written by me.

1:11:54And so we see that she left a note on everybody's mirror that said, everybody better abide by these instructions. Rule number one, clear, clean, precise. Focus the statement of your position. because, you know, she's in therapy class now. She's going to be a psychologist now. But also, like, this is the Miami cast. I don't, focused statement of your position is just a concept that does not exist on this show. Marisol's like, oh, God, it says evidence, credible data, statistics, expert opinion, site verifying. Oh, please, geez, give me a break.

1:12:31So she's like, yeah, well, terminology was so legal. So she's like, I'm going to Harvard, girl. I write all the time. So Kiki. Don't know the difference between ratchet and wretched, but I can write all these fine bullet points for you guys. Yeah. So Kiki thinks of them all as sisters. Mary so loves having girlfriends. And Julia, you know, she says, it wasn't my best season and my worst season. Her family was great, but she's so sorry who she's hurt, everybody. and I hope to rediscover each and every one of you and move in a positive note. Will everybody please raise my children? Because my daughters will not.

1:13:15And Larsa, I feel like good like. I'm like with my friends like and I feel like we have like such a solid friendship like and I like have a new basketball player like and I could like say something to like make you mad but like, you know, like even you Adriana, if you ever call me like, I'll be there for you. Like anytime I see my phone light up and says Old lady that I know I'll be like it's Adriana calling Like I gotta answer it like Old lady probably calling from landline That's how I feel like

1:13:45Alexia what about you She's like blinkin' Spanish Blinkin' Spanish Blinkin' Spanish Okay Well who needs a cocky Cheers ladies I want to thank you for an incredible season Yo soy Andy Cohen Puta Sucina and me bokeh, okay? I don't, what do you mean your soy sauce? No, it's a, I'm not even going to bother explaining that to you, Lisa. You should know by now. And that brings us to the end of season seven of Real Housewives of Miami. Glorious. Glorious. What a wonderful show. I'm already excited for next season. Great work to everyone involved. Everyone from the people on the screen, the people off the screen, I salute you.

1:14:28You did an amazing job. Great work. And I'm ready. Great show. I'm ready for more Miami. I love your show. You know what? I would say Miami is the reigning champ of the cities. As in like there's the suburban ones, which is like ruled by Salt Lake City. And the city ones, which I think is ruled by Miami. That's my proclamation. I don't know why I felt like proclaiming it, but I proclaimed it everywhere. There you go. It's been proclaimed. Love the show. Love the ladies. Love you guys for listening. Thanks so much for being here. We will be back later on with Real Housewives of Orange County. And next week, YSwap starts.

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