#3138 Crappens Rewind: Ep 479 RHONY Would You Believe It? LuAnn Got Married!

0:20Hey everyone, welcome to Watch Your Crap Ends, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker from bsidem.com and the Banter Blender. And joining me, as usual, is the wonderful and hilarious and lovely and perhaps slightly hungover, because I'm just slightly hungover, not really, Ronnie Karam from trashtalktv.com and the Rose Pricks Bachelor slash Bachelorette podcast. What's up, Ronnie? Well, hello, little Ben. Yeah, hello there. Ronnie and I hit the town last night. we went out to the Abbey with none other than Hannah from Below Deck Mediterranean and it was beyond fun.

1:02Beyond fun. She's so fun. Oh my gosh. So beautiful too. Smella. I know. She was like well I'm just going to throw in something I'll probably look like a hussy and she shows up looking gorgeous and I was like shut your face Hannah. Yeah that's an expensive hussy. That is not a cheap hussy that's for sure. yeah that was fun and if you go on to our instagram which is at watch what crappens on instagram we have a picture but we also have some we have some stories so go check that out now before they expire oh yeah go look them over yeah she's so funny she's like and then i'll have a day with a really hot guy from wherever and then i might go to dubai to see this and then i'll be in the south of france doing this it's like jesus it lives quite the awesome life i know i came home I'm like, I really suck.

1:52Yeah. Well, you know what's also sucky is that we walked her to Catch, which is where she was going to have dinner. And we didn't realize Katie Cazorla was there at Catch. We could have had such a big powwow, but we didn't. Oh, well. Oh, Cazorla. We should have looked in there. Yeah, there were all these people taking pictures. is um i like there's so many little tiny short people who are apparently famous and they all drive these gigantic jeeps and like huge army cars yeah and then these little tiny men come out you know like little tiny persian men dripping with gold come out and i'm like where are where are you people it's like there's a whole different life that those people lead you know and you only see them if you stand outside restaurants like that exactly and the paparazzi would take photos of all of them like literally a bum would walk up to the restaurant the paparazzi were taking photos but like me and ronnie no photos yeah what are you gonna do it might have something to do with us taking pictures of the paparazzi we're like wow look at their cameras yeah on our instagram story and then like when we eventually got home i was drunk and i turned on the tv and the property brothers were on i took some belligerent instagram stories of the property brothers i was looking at them today i was like huh so it's a fun night now those are celebrities yeah those are real stars yeah i would understand them coming out of a giant jeep i'd be like oh my god the property bros yeah but the other guys i'm like was this guy like a background on shots of sunset once yeah i don't know but everybody apparently knew because they were like click click click click click click click click maybe it was like french montana or something yeah i don't even know but you know what are you gonna do i was like yay oh our uh our chevy our 1983 chevy lyft is here to get a yes with an extra from breaking bad driving it she really was she was like he did this to me she was like you guys are the best i want to hang out with you guys all the time can't do it can't even do her math meth voice yeah it was a great night um but even more excitingly is that we have a real housewives of new york city recap to dive into and by the way if you're new to this podcast because you learn about us through the bitch bible jackie schimmel welcome we hope we can live up the expectations yes and go listen to jackie hilarious yeah soups soups funny new pod friend for sure yeah love her all right so shall we jump into can you believe it girls it's the wedding episode can you believe it girls can i've got wedding rings on both of my ring fingers that's how married i am i'm so ringed up i took beyonce's advice and i had a ring but i'm both of them oh we start with the amy winehouse music that's rehab right uh yes No.

5:00You know I'm bad. You know rehab is like it's a little bit more of a charm. Okay, yeah. Do we have to be licensed to our estate now? I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, come after me. Get in line behind Capital One, Amy Winehouse. The ghost of Amy Winehouse is coming to haunt our podcast now. Yeah, you think I can't press block this collar on your ghost i can't well any episode that features dorinda is sort of spiritually a successor to amy winehouse so i'm i it makes sense yeah every time that music plays it's like uh-oh drunk dorinda is gonna make a speech in this episode um yes so the episode opens with edgar aka frenchy making eggs in sonya's kitchen in the breakfast for breakfast I don't know if I even believe this guy's French, because this guy is like cartoon French.

6:00He's like, hoodly, hoodly. Oh, Sonia from Manuela, don't the coffee. Sonia, you like the egg? And she says, did you bring this? And it's a poinsettia plant. He's like, ah, yes, I brought Sonia. You like the egg? Something about this whole thing with Edgar Frenchie feels, what's the word, like completely fake? Like this is clearly an arrangement for the TV show. yeah this is like a gay she met outside the port authority bus station you know yeah exactly first of all i mean who wears a blazer to make eggs for sonia in the morning okay that's already suspect with a handkerchief in the pocket like a folded handkerchief yeah he's like a i'm sure really bad faux french version of adam scott that's what he is oh is that little dot here Tinsley going to be awake for the egg?

6:53Should I make egg for Tinsley? And she's like, oh, you know, Tinsley, getting her hair done, doing her makeup. Okay. Sonia's just like wrapping her teeth. Yeah. You know, Tinsley, she'll wake up and push the covers off. You know, Tinsley, she just opens her eyes when she wakes up. So typical. Oh, she's probably yawning about now, wondering what kind of makeup she's going to wear. and he's like, oh, these women you have this habit of the makeup and stuff and you need every day this habit for the women. So sure enough, Tinsley comes down. She's like, oh, can I get a tissue? Anyone? And she's like, oh, I'm excited for breakfast.

7:36Frenchie stays! Frenchie, would you mind opening the front door if you hear the doorbell ring? I'm waiting for some hats. Sonia's passed out on the floor. Stay away from Frenchie.

7:53i'm i'm training frenchy to stop connor from opening the door when your hats come it's a process

8:03so sonia is you know admitting that this thing with frenchy is going too far and she's like you know what i thought was an 11 to 7 turned into a 7-11 yeah i knew that i mean this guy is cheap i'm like are you so you're saying there are a bunch of meth heads that have accumulated around your house because that sort of makes sense. I mean, the pizza isn't that great at 3 in the morning, but at 3 in the morning, who cares? You know what I like about 7-Elevens? They really appreciate the past. Like, for instance, that hot dog that's been on the rollers has been in there as long as I've had computer number 3.

8:36Oh, Sonjiza. That's where Pickles is. She's just rotating on Sonja's little hot dog thing in the basement. I got one from the 7-Eleven. Pickles is like literally in a pickles jar downstairs. just waiting to emerge she's like please someone unscrew this top and let me free free pickles people she's in a cryogenic state yeah so frenchy uh frenchy's playing donna reed you know yeah and uh sorry we're gonna say something no i'm just like laughing about pickles in a jar you're to come out and like imagining her like finally climbing out she's like is it the year 2135 like no it's actually just three years later she's like oh she's like well at least the computers are still here it's like a box of soap and some old paper towels carved into it some old viva paper towels that were never open it's actually not viva paper towels it's actually a roll of paper towels made from other paper towels it's like a little viva a little charm and a little up and up.

9:42Recycled paper towels. I have an extra paper towel so I can make a new roll from the spare parts. So she's, Tinsley's just down there to start shit. She's like, hey, Frenchie, so what about this other dude you're dating? What happened to Rocco? And he's like, oh, I do not care. You know, this dating, these rules you have in America, you date, you be with someone, you tie them down, tie them to a tree, Every time mailman comes, dog tries to bite the leg off. It's like, Jesus Christ, Frenchie. You know, that's Frenchie's way of just saying, I can fuck whoever I want and I'm still getting free rent.

10:21And don't try and step onto my property, bitch. Like, let my arrangement stand, Tinsley. I'm feeding you an egg right now. Well, Tinsley has a right to make the digs because apparently Frenchie was intended for Tinsley. But then Sonya took him for herself. So this is her little way of getting revenge. French. Yeah. And she's like, well, so you're seeing other people too, Frenchy? And he's like, seeing, yes, but no, not having sex. This is friends. Oh, I don't like words. You Americans, you have these words, you say. You have a word that means something and then it's supposed to mean something else.

10:55I don't even know what you're saying. Senti structure. Come on. And so he's like, yeah, friends. Yeah, just friends. I don't like words either. Frenchy going off to beauty school down with words so then so after this Frenchy scene we then go over to Bethany's apartment where she is making a whole bunch of little Christmas gifts for the ladies minus Ramona and by Bethany making Christmas gifts I mean Julia her assistant is doing them because Bethany's going to have a Christmas party yeah her assistant's just walking around going Bethany you look wonderful and of course there's a huge skinny girl luge ice sculpture in the middle yeah just in case anybody forgot what bethany does for a living yeah and bethany the professional chef is having this catered by a guy it wasn't named joe or something like that who's actually making a lot of delicious stuff um but like my i was like sort of traumatized by bethany eating a lobster roll and then talking with her mouth open and it was just like all gooey and cream cheesy like these strings of of mayo or cream cheese or whatever all in her mouth it's like it's not a good look bethany she's just trying to prove that she can eat you know she's like look i'm eating like what's the matter happy holidays like what is this like rampas i don't get it like what's going on you got a close-up of this yeah like why is this an olympic event like it's illusion like i don't get it like what like i thought you're supposed to die on this it's supposed to be scary like like i don't know it's not fast like i could do it i can get do i get gold medal now like am i going olympics am i like olympian now like literally kill me now like honestly like you know what like send me down the luge thing and just kill me now and like run me over the bobsled then like i can't it's too cold oh bethany you're hilarious all right what's the matter what's the matter what's going on where's the luge so she's made little she's made little balloon heads of all the ladies except for ramona and she's put them in like these glass vows i mean it's weird it's basically like a bunch of decapitated how they were like they were like uh i thought there were christmas ornaments that had their faces on them oh i thought they were balloons i guess that makes more sense i mean those were huge though no they were nice they were nice and personalized they had caricatures they were they were nice it was a good gift um this one looks like one of ramona's breast implants so so then we she's like well you know last year i had a holiday party and i just loved it so now it's annual it's like gonna be every year like christmas you know it's gonna come it's gonna come like christmas every year my favorite is then then we cut to dorinda in the cab and she You just had like all this tissue paper and plastic and this is all yours.

13:37Now this is why I keep back under the couch. You ask me, last minute rapper. Like, how could you do that when you have John sitting on that couch? You know, Dorinda just loves to sit there and be mad at John at all times. Like she's putting wrapping paper under the couch cushion. Can you stop making noise, Jan? Trying to watch the good fight.

14:03All right. You're making too much noise. I'm going in the other room watching La Nada.

14:09So, yeah. She's, like, making some – like, all this tissue paper is, like, rubbing up against her mic. It was so obnoxious, but you know the editors – it's classic Dorinda, and that's why the editors put it in there. I mean, that is so funny, Dorinda. It's, like, five packages. of that wrapping tissue. What are you wrapping that you need all of that? There probably was no gift in there. She's like, and you know what's funny? I forgot a gift after all that. I don't know why I think about it sometimes. Sometimes I don't even know what I'm thinking about. So funny. Like a regular birthday gift. Is it her birthday?

14:46I don't know. I just forget things. It's called being a blackout drunk, Dorinda. Sometimes you know you're supposed to do something. And then you wake up like late in and you're like, what was I supposed to do? Yeah, stop drinking. They're supposed to go driving. So then – So everyone's about – It's over across town. Ramona's putting on lipstick. She's like, oh, look. There's a stick. It's a stick of stuff for my lips. I'm going to put it on. And I heard Bethany's having a holiday party and I'm not invited. Am I happy about it? No. but it's a good thing is i'm going out with avery and her girlfriends avery and her girlfriends are basically like me and my girlfriends basically i'm just like one of the girls i'm like a 22 year old girl we're just gonna go out and get some wine okay this is avery's girlfriends are like my girlfriends except no one in their group has had sex with tom yet no whoa is this what it means when it says you're going to get a 23 and me kit you go out and hang out with a bunch of 23 year old girls okay because i like it so then over at sonia's she's packing a bunch of crap to make room for frenchie yeah uh who's coming in wait is this when we find this out oh no but she's so tinsley and so base no sonia's just packing to go to fouquet for new year's and tinsley and connor so Tinsley and Connor are like yay because they apparently are going to have a big party once Sonia leaves and they put it out on paperless posts and Sonia's like you know like she's very distracting to my assistant she has to stop like what is Connor doing what is Connor doing all day do you know how many things he could be doing for me paperless I have plenty of paperless things that he could do what math equations is he trying to solve right now or formulas okay that he cannot be distracted from just numbers flying by connor's head like a beautiful mind it's time for a commercial it's time for a crappin's commercial

16:59so let's see she's packing then uh bethany is getting ready for her party and she's talking to the chef and she's like remember last year remember last year when i ordered a lobster roll that was great yeah i went to all the other boroughs too like lobster roll lobster roll lobster roll what are you even talking about just please just please leave him alone let him do his job yeah but but that's not gonna happen for him because dorinda comes shows up and she's like you know what i want to do i want to learn how to open up an oyster so so he like he's he he shows her he's like oh you stick it in there and you wait for the little release like oh it's like sexual and stuff.

17:33He was being sexual. He was like the next John. I mean, Dorinda, I can't believe Dorinda didn't put on her flip-flops and try and climb that mountain, because he is like John. He's like, yeah, well, here's what you do. You get this knife, and then you put it in his ass. It's the back door. Just the tip. And Bethany's like, yeah, just the tip. I knew you was going to say that, Bethany. Yeah, well, it's the tip, you know. Just put the tip in there. He's like, yeah. Then you shove it in there, and then you move it around a little bit, and you try not to get stuff splurting everywhere and then boom.

18:04It is like sex. It's like eating oysters. It's like eating the sea. Wet and salty. I will say this about Bethany. She is always good for a low-hanging fruit sex joke because if you say something like,

18:19wow, the wind is really blowing. Yeah, like a blowjob? Huh? You're like, okay, Bethany. I hope they're making a lot of money for that blowing. Get it? The wind's blowing so hard. It's like a hooker down on Bourbon Street. You know what I'm saying? It's like blowing all night long. You know what I'm saying? Wet and salty. I think he's talking about vaginas. He's like, I'm literally talking about vaginas. I like how that has become part of our Bethany impersonation. That's the one thing she's actually... Because she's never ever done that. But Bethany's humor has become so Catskills-y. Like we just met.

18:51Well, Bethany laughs like Kate Chastain. And so you can't imitate her laugh because it's just this. that's her entire laugh she has the next level laugh where she will just be like you know but that's like that rare laugh where you laugh so hard you're like practically crying you know but yeah mostly it's that when she can't help it she sounds like Drew Barrymore being murdered and scream you know so Dorinda back with the oyster Dorinda's like this is so sexy it's literally the oyster I'm gonna take this to the bedroom and teach jan i'm like please don't shove anything inside john's back door and expect wet and salty like i don't need to hear any of this please no excessive slurping around john can we just celebrate baby jesus how about that guys how about that well we can if we go over to megu with ramona and all the uh all the girls where ramona is like i can't believe it i've known these girls for like 10 years they went to aviary's sweet 16 and now they're drinking wine i'm learning things about wine for them.

19:55Now they know their Chardonnay and their Sangiovese and their Chirac. They know everything now. It's crazy. Whoa. They're Burgundies. They're Pinots. They're Chardonnays. God forbid I don't have the right flavor of wine for them. Whoa. That's crazy. Remember this one time when I was this little girl and I was looking at my dad's wine and I said, could I have some of that wine? And Geraldine Parsons Smith came up to me and said, You sure can, because as we all know, you're the big wine expert, as in W-H-I-N-E. And to this day, I've never been able to tell the difference between wine and wine, okay?

20:33I'm sorry, I can't. When they get out at the restaurant, it's like this sexy sex in the city. I've got no Ramonas. Ramona was just so perfect in this entire episode. I only need to go off what Ramona actually does on this, because she's like, Look, sexy ladies coming out of the car. Okay, how about when we come out of the car, you put the camera down on the ground. So all you see is legs, like sexy legs. Play that Amy Wine music because these girls love their wines. Okay? It's like boom, boom, boom. Like 20-year-old legs, 20-year-old legs, 20-year-old legs. And the Ramona is like boom, boom. Thank you, okay?

21:16Thank you so much, okay? He, he, he. Or just one of the girls. Thank you. So the girls start arriving over at Bethany's house and Carol's like, you said to wear sparkles.

21:37Literally, the girl from the ring is crawling out of the TV and is ready to have a holiday party. My hair's in my face. Is there a step coming up? I'm sorry, I just finished decorating my wow. Hey, speaking of wealth, we have a luge over there. You know, go try it. It's a luge. Like, you put liquor in the top and it comes out the bottom of the well. It's amazing. It's amazing, Green Girl. Try it. Yeah, put your lips on it. Like, do it right now. She's like, well, I like to drink when it's fun. And then Carol puts her lips around that luge. Aren't you just supposed to open your mouth and just let stuff?

22:17I don't need all these full contact luge. lips of this group. But she does it. She's like, I'm only going to drink again if it's from a luge or a sippy straw. For some reason, that really made me laugh. Because she smiled so happily. Because you can tell she really loves a sippy straw. And I think that her delight was contagious for me. Yeah, I drink everything with a sippy straw. You'll notice I even drink my martinis with a straw. I prefer a straw. I took it from my water that's why I always have a water I ordered three drinks a water, a glass of ice and a martin forgot about that thing a shot of tequila in a tall glass and some water in a short glass and some water in a medium sized glass and 19 limes just in case you never know what you're going to need so speaking of, Ramona's in heaven over at this restaurant because there's like 90 ,000 glasses on the table.

23:19She's like, this is called power, girls. This is power glass. And Avery's like, Pellegrino's like my water. I literally called it water growing up. I'm like, because it is water. It's sparkling water. And then this other girl goes, that's like one of my favorite things about going over to your house. There's always called bottled water. I was like, girl, which desert have you been living in? Ramona you girls you guys can hang with me okay we'll call it like once a week we could do it and we could call it the thing no the singer thing okay and then you guys could have your friends and then I can bring my friends and then we'll mix and it'll be just girls being girls with other girls and her friends her friend goes do your girlfriends have sons that maybe they could bring and ramona just gives her this look like you're missing the point of what i'm trying to say okay clearly what i want to get was not involve penises yeah who could blame him he's grown up nicely yeah he certainly has so then we um we learned that ramona had actually had a charity event the night before and we see on and all these flashbacks that tinsley lets the out of the bag about bethany's holiday party because she's like hey so are you going to you're going to bethany's party do you have a tissue and everyone's like what party i didn't even know about it okay so am i upset about it yeah uh do you uh why is word baby why is the bubby version of word baby here there's like some guy who looks like warren baby had all his blood sucked out and then all of his skin tied behind his head with like a rubber band and then someone put a lot of lotion on him and just set him loose in this party.

25:16He looks sort of like a svelte penguin from like Batman Penguin not like an actual penguin. And I think he even was like here's the key to the city or whatever like he was really He definitely was a Tim Burton creature that's for sure. Like he could have been like Beetlejuice's brother. Yes. it's like the guy that you know that helena bottom carter fucked to mess up that whole marriage you're like oh helena of course you ruined it over that guy it's like worth it so ramona is back with the girls and she's like girls so girls anybody want to curl my hair right now while they tell this story hey can we have a comb could you bring a comb we're gonna comb each other's hair because we're girls she's like girl talk slumber party okay look at me i'm sandra d no offense to anybody here okay she just pushes my buttons okay yeah sandra d came up to me and she was pushing my buttons and i blacked out like an animal okay i went on a rampage like an animal blackout rampage okay i was like a bear eating fish and knocking over trees i don't even remember but i saw it on the news i was like a bull in a china shop except i would never break any china that was colored yellow because yellow reminds me of sunshine okay also bethany's full of so much bull i can't compete get it girls i'm like a bethany in a china shop because she's just pure bull okay yeah so ramona was like the girls well she's like me you know she grew up in crazy homes and like she's just you know she's like thin and good looking and gorgeous and just successful businesswoman who's adored by all the fans who had her own talk show we're just like the same so her friend uh avery's friend's like well you shouldn't have to walk on eggshells around your friends i mean that's not fair to you and that's not true friendship yeah everyone's like hallelujah hallelujah spoken from a 22 year old girl could you believe it can you believe it and then what i loved was that there was some other girl who like clearly wanted to piggyback and like get points with ramona and this other girl just goes yeah you don't want to have to walk on eggshells with your friend yeah i'm like that's what that other bitch just said be quiet just drink your pellegrino okay you're not adding anything substantive to this to this conversation okay did i even say that word right could use to me so over at the party dorinda's like yeah it was a party ramona had a party i went and i said my piece and we get a flashback why weren't we shown this party i don't know party looks amazing it looks so good by the way i just want to say that i was really amused that ramona declared that she had a bond with the 22 year old girls they're now all bonded for life we're together forever yeah so anyway yes so dorinda we get a flashback of this party she's like hey ramona it's drunk dorinda so she's like flying off the handle she's like don't you yell at me ramona my ass is a shithole it's like the goddamn Playboy Castle.

28:36I had to go in there and peel Scott Bay off the floor. I mean, who, what are you? What are you, some paint chipping eating monster?

28:49And I told you, you're a disgrace. Last year, your dog shit's all over. This year, you'll rip down the walls. Next year, I'm just gonna leave you a tiny little terrorist with a bomb vest, and you can just push him over and blow the entire place up, Ramona.

29:07And then Sonia walks into Bethany's party and she sees Dorinda talking about the paints again. She's like, this again? Do we have to always talk about this?

29:21Connor, did I tell you, has anybody heard about what a paperless post is? Someone please explain that to me. How do you have a post of that paper? I tried to log on to my Apple IIe. I can't find anything about it, but I did use Bank Street Press to write a nice little poem. If there's no paper, what's the postman going to post? I mean, I worry for those guys. Who's going to be bringing on the doorbell that we're not answering for Tinsley? I mean, I've never heard of anything so ridiculous. How are you going to have the New York Post without paper? I mean, how am I going to read page six without the pages?

29:50Doesn't make sense. The New York Post list? Does that make sense to anybody else? How are they going to subscribe? How do you even send in the little subscribe thing that's in the middle of the paper? I just wish Tinsley would make sense. I just wish that she would say things that made sense so she could focus on her career and focus on getting a man and focus on getting out of my house.

30:11So Dorinda does still go about it more and more. And then it cuts back to Ramona at dinner. And she's like, oh, my God, girl. So, girls, Dorinda got so upset with me because there were these things on the wall and they were lit up. And I was so upset emotionally. Like she starts tapping her head. She's like, emotionally, I wasn't thinking because of Bethany. And so I just tore it and it took some painting. And she's so upset now. She's so upset. I like that because basically there were lights from production that were taped up on the walls. That Ramona, she can't say that. But she's also afraid to actually say the word lights.

30:50So she makes it sound like there's some alien creatures. There are these things. And they're all lit up. I couldn't find a plug. And they were just bright. And I just saw lights. And I was like, Gloria Estefan. I finally saw the light and I didn't like it. I tore it down. I broke up the paint. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I ruined your house. But there were bright things. Shining objects. I can't deal. Little UFOs. Private in my room. Sonia was trying to get them to probe her. I said get off the dresser. I'm trying to sleep. Sonia, this is not time to play communion. Okay? You're not dealing with aliens.

31:23I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Close encounters with the Sonia Morgan kind. no one wants to probe your anus okay so she ripped them off the wall or whatever now here's where ramona and you can even see that dorinda probably said uh ramona if they were production lights they were just plugged in it's not like they're wired to the house because she said there were these things on the wall and i mean i guess there was a plug but i didn't see the plug because emotionally upset because bethany because like 9 11 like the vietnam war you understand like upset okay so instead of just unplugging the light she like rips them off like the hulk yeah which is they must have been hot i don't even know how she did it but and then it cuts to sonya and she goes well that's just typical ramona i mean i told you every time we go to a hotel she trashes the bathrooms like she's a rock star which is so disgusting you could just see ramona like oh Really, trash can?

32:22You think you're right side up right now? You're not. You're upside down. Whoa, I already take a shit in this toilet, but I'm not going to flush it, okay? I'm just going to add more toilet paper and more and more and more. Wow, what a crazy life I live. I dropped a towel on the ground, okay? My band is called Poison. Whoa, making me clean up my own mess? You know what that is? That's de classe. There's a reason why they have me. It's their job. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm not going to clean up my own bathroom, okay? I'm a regular Janice Chopin.

32:59I'm a Jimmy Hydrox, just like the cookbook. I'm Beethoven, not the dog, the rock star. So she's back at dinner. She's like, cheers, girls, to nothing ever being my fault. No, and cheers to not walking on eggshells. and that girl's like yeah you shouldn't ever walk on yeah you shouldn't have eggshells i said it too

33:28so then back at bethany bethany's is cheering too she's like all right everybody cheers cheers cheers because it's like eggnog in these chocolate chip cups because they're cups but they're made out of chocolate chip cookies but like you know they've been special so like watch out it's drunk and carol's like i'm only drinking again if it's from a chocolate chip cup or a lose or a sippy cup. I love that Carol's boundaries are just totally being blown open this episode. It was a big episode for personal growth for her. I learned so much. Carol has found three things she'll drink from now. Watch out.

34:06Hey, I was in a cookie cup any day. I was really jealous. How far behind can A.A. be? Oh yeah, cookie cups looked really good. I was starving. It occurred to me that because we had dinner and it occurred to me that it was not like a very big dinner because we were talking so much that like i realized afterwards i was like i only i had like five little chicken meatballs and that was it essentially i had three pieces of that roll and like two pieces of meat that i didn't understand that came on the skewers yeah how did those little people eat all that food that was a lot of food right it was it was a lot of food but it's just that we were talking so much and so um it was like when i got home and i was watching this drunk new york which is why i'm a little patchy with some of this i was like wait a second i'm starving we didn't really have dinner i love days like that i know i was like you know you know those people who are like oh i just forgot to eat today i'm a little lightheaded i'm like who the fuck forgets to eat like my hope my body won't let it's like you're not eating you're not eating what are you doing right now you're not eating why aren't you eating right now but we did it we successfully forgot to have a full dinner well i came home and ate a couple of tylenol pms oh okay that'll help delicious commercials here comes one right now

35:26so let's see here what's next what's next is the one and only wedding this is the wedding we've been waiting for for a year um as some of you probably already know luann did not allow bravo cameras into her wedding which is a big mistake huge huge mistake but she had all this like personal footage that i think she sold to people magazine or something like that so essentially bravo kind of did like a little montage of luann's personal footage um which was sort of nice too because it you know at least it was quick it was like a five minute thing of you know there's luann getting to address and there's luann posing and there's luann and tom and there's tom and hair makeup you know this was a huge surprise because you know mostly bravo people get married so that their wedding is paid for by bravo yeah they're like we got to do it in the season um but she didn't and i thought that was odd because she is a tv person and you know she would want the attention etc but then i thought you know she probably does not want cameras following around tom yeah because i mean this guy cannot keep his foot out of his mouth like everything he says is so awkward and weird that if they had cameras following him around, you know, she knows what production did last year with that makeout thing in the fucking bar lounge.

36:43She knows that was production. He took that picture. Yeah, she I agree with you. I think she was like, listen, I just want to have fun at my wedding and I don't want to be bothered with being faced with Tom's infidelity. So let's just stick our heads in the sand and enjoy this. Yes. But me, I was You can't tape. There's nothing to tape under the sand. But meanwhile, I'm thinking to myself, you know, in Vanderpump Rules, we had three episodes devoted to Katie and Tom's Wednesday wedding up in the forest. And here we only get five minutes of Luann's. This is like the first Bravo wedding I've been genuinely excited to see ever.

37:21And you know there was only one main camera because Jill Zarin was in front of it the whole time. She's like, hi, it's me, Jill. Jill Zarin. Remember me? still got it mazel tov yeah it was a lot of and then just like a lot of luann narrative like it's beautiful it's perfect it's wonderful what a perfect day i'm so ready and i'm so happy and then um uh then they show the the ceremony and the officiant is like love is reckless not reason i'm like damn even he's against this you're making a reckless decision luann i'm here to tell you like is when you're making out with someone at a hotel bar love is when you go home to someone who's pretending nothing ever happened mazel tov everybody love is looking the other way when your wife hooks up with a johnny debt pirate so after he bangs sonia anally in a greenhouse all right everybody let's crush the glass and get on with it shall we so uh uh my only observations was Noelle is super hot now that he's like 22.

38:24And Kelly Ben Simone was there. Did you see Kelly Ben Simone in the background? No, I was making an egg sandwich. Oh, well, it's pretty much the same experience. But she was there. And then was that Amanda Lepore coming out of the cake? This is your brain on Ben Simone. Any questions? Actually, many, many questions. Yeah, it was like home video footage. And Luanne just kept saying, I'm happy. Can you believe it? Look at me. I'm so happy. Oh, and then I walked down the aisle. Oh, so happy. I'm so happy. Like, I'm making a sandwich. I can't. Was that Amanda Lepore at one point? Like, literally? I don't know.

39:01I really was truly making a sandwich. Okay. I think Amanda Lepore came out of a cake. But I could be wrong. Oh, that Marilyn Monroe chick? Yeah. Yeah, that was funny. And then Luanne's like, look, I have a sombrero. Everybody enjoy their tacos. And she, like, took off her sombrero. and that playmate is kissing her. She's like, you're gorgeous. And Luann said, you know, it's just you find someone in life and you have a playmate. And now I have a new playmate. And I love my new playmate. I'm like, well, do you love his new playmate? His playmate just jumped out a damn cake, Luann. Come on. I think my favorite part to come out of this wedding was the fact that Luann released a new single.

39:43That was my favorite part of it. My God, I cannot wait to hear it. I heard about it. but I couldn't stay up for Watch What Happens Live when she performed it. Okay, well, guess what? Of course, since we are a professional podcast, we have the single right here, so I'm going to play it. All right, is everyone ready to hear Luanne's new single? Oh my God, I'm so excited. By everyone, I mean Ronnie. Okay, here we go. Would you believe it, girls? I'm getting married. Me, Countess Luanne de Lisepse, to Tom D 'Agostino. Whoa, that's crazy. Sonya used to bang Tom all the time, and we used to play Mackin.

40:17What a crazy world. Can't you just be happy for me Ramona? Yachts, Hamptons, West Palm Beach, now we have them all in reach. We've got money, we've got flair, look at Bethany with my hair. So come on Dorinda, come on Jill. We got the art and Tom's got the bid. Cause it's Wednesday night at the Regency. Tommy Toon's gonna show, just wait and see. So what is this? Is this like a rap? Like a rap? Like a wedding rap? Like I don't get it, like I don't get your brand from me. I don't understand what's going on, like I'm saying kill me now. Hey, be happy for her! Do the D 'Agostino, do the D 'Agostino.

41:01Got my tickets, got my room, but where's the invite? Is it coming soon? Tom's a cheater, I'm sorry he is, but you know what they say, ignorance is bliss. Why can't you bitches just be happy for me? Ooh, I like the way that sounds. Let's just work with this a little bit. I'm feeling a little inspired. Okay, here we go. Why can't you bitches be happy for me? And Tom. Like, what is this? Do the D 'Agostino. Do the D 'Agostino. Do the D 'Agostino. Do the D 'Agostino. Oh, I did Tom. For like 10 years. We were lovers. Do the D 'Agostino. They loved me down there. So, it's kind of funny. because Luanne's friend Barbara isn't so sure that she wants to go through that.

41:47Hey, does anyone have a tissue? Does anyone have a tissue? Hey, John. John Gattinsley's a tissue. You know what they say. You get some snot on you. It happens, you know. Please say it's not about Tom. It's about Tom. Just thinking, I think it's a bad guy, Luanne. I think it's a bad guy. Really? At least you didn't have to hear about it on page six, okay? Do the D 'Agostino. Do the D 'Agostino. Do the D 'Agostino. Do the tagostino Do the tagostino Do the tagostino Do the tagostino Do the tagostino It is about Tom And me Would you believe it? We're getting married That is fucking amazing Really?

42:40that is fucking perfection oh man luann sometimes it's moments like these when i realize why i have not gone ahead in hollywood because i'm making stupid ass songs on garage band

42:58that shit is hilarious oh man well thank you and thank you luann thank you luann thank you luann really

43:12be happy for them let her be happy

43:21that was amazing yeah good job luann good job thank you luann thank you luann i don't know it will be it will be can you believe it girls getting married oh that is so good guys before we go any further in this episode there's something really really quick and easy we want you to do. We rely on advertising to keep this show free. And if you could do us a favor, could you go to podcastlistener.com slash crappins and answer a few short questions? It'd be super helpful to us. Yeah, again, that's podcastlistener.com slash crappins. Podcastlistener.com slash crappins. Just take that little survey, okay?

44:07It takes like a minute. And you know, who doesn't love a good survey? Thanks. Okay, podcast over. no just kidding because guess what two weeks later now we're in january and it's bethany and carol getting dim sum and i love the way bethany talks about carol sometimes because carol's like why are these ducks hanging from the windows and bethany's just like i don't get carol like she's like lost in america like she doesn't know what she where she is like like we live in new york city the guys come out with carts and eat dumplings that's what you do like i don't get I don't understand why Carol's having such a hard time with this.

44:40Carol's like, is this place even real? She's like, of course it's real. Why would you even say it's not real? She's like, because Trump said that global warming is a Chinese hoax. So maybe Chinatown's a hoax, too. She's like, just shut up. Just pick a roll. Look, look. We're looking at things that aren't white right now, okay? Just enjoy it for a moment. Okay? It's Simpsom, okay? Pick a roll. Just do something. Pick them. They're going to do it. You do it. I don't want to. And she's like, you're very negative. And then the waiter comes by with all the food. And she goes, she's being very negative today.

45:15Really negative. Super negative. What? You're going to frown at a rib? You see? She's frowning at a rib. Like, seriously? Like, who doesn't like a bow? Like, I'll see you take a bow. Like, literally, take a bow. Take a bow and get out of here. Like, I can't deal with you anymore. Like, curtain call. It's time for you to go. You're so American right now. So she's like, I'm not negative. Someone needs coffee. Like, well, it's not on the cart. so I'm not going to get it. It's only what's on the cart. I only eat food when it's not on wheels. Is there a sippy cup with fried rice in it? Otherwise I'm out of here.

45:48Does this green tea come in a chocolate chip cookie cup? No? Okay. Can I add that green tea from a luge please? Is it luge? You want rib? Your green tea destroyed our luge. I can see your ribs, get it? No! You're the worst. Why am I even going to lunch with you? Honestly, kill me right now. Shoot me. Shoot me. Shoot me. That's what I am. Shoot me. Shoot me right now. Hark out. So Bethany's like, yeah, what about that wedding? Did that even happen? Because she's having a party to celebrate a marriage that nobody saw. If a marriage happens in Palm Beach that nobody saw, did it even happen? Seriously?

46:32See? It's just like philosophical questions. Like, I can't, like, literally, I can't, like, fortunately. And so they, so then Carol talks about how there's other rumors about Tom now, blah, blah, blah. And then she starts talking about how Adam's finally moving out. And she's like, I said, honey, do you need help moving? Here's everything. Your watermelon radishes, your skateboard, your unwashed socks, the razor you never use. You're just for men. Yeah, you're just going to say your box of peroxide. Your little foil doilies you put in your hair when you highlight it. Get out! Get out! Get out!

47:15I lost my carol voice. I had been working on it for a few weeks, but now I've gone the other way. I've regressed, so now I'm back to croaking like, eh! I'm basically just Marge Simpson on her dying breath. I leave everything to Lisa.

47:37Including Adam's stuff. So, meanwhile, Ramona goes and visits Dorinda. She's like, I want all the deets about the wedding, okay? I want all the deets. I learned that word. Look, I'm hip. Don't give me details. Give me deets, okay? I need deets. I learned it from a 22-year-old girl who I have a bond with. Very special. She gave me very good advice about eggshells. I don't remember what. Something about, like, make sure to crush all the eggshells. I don't know. Would you like me to do the Roger Rabbit before you give me the deed? So then Dorinda's giving her the deeds. And at one point, she starts talking about how, like, yeah, we all went to the leopard lounge.

48:21And Ramona goes, everyone went there? That's nice. Yeah. That's nice. Ramona's really laying it on thick for this. She's like, oh, she looks gorgeous. Like, she looks like she's from a magazine of, like, ladies who just take in rich, you know, sluts into their lives. Like, if there was a magazine about that, she would be the cover girl. What a beaut. And Dorinda's like, yeah, I almost forgot to go to the wedding. I forgot to book my tickets. And then the week before, she texted me, like, you're going to come to the wedding? We'll meet here. And I was like, oh, my God, it's the wedding. I forgot.

48:55Totally forgot. Good thing I got this tissue paper.

49:03Then I'm there. I'm in Palm Beach after the leopard place. It's the next day and I get a text. You're supposed to be. If you're here, you make up, et cetera, et cetera. And I thought, oh, my God, I'll go over there tipsy at noon. And then I forgot my bridesmaid's dress. And then I found out I was in Palm Springs, not Palm Beach. Oh my God. I said Palm Desert. That's close, right? So then next thing I know, I get off the plane, you know, 16 hours later. And I'm like, what? Why am I at the Palm in Dubai? Oh God. You're getting married at the Palms and Vegas, right? She said, no. I was like, God, jeez.

49:47I'm rolling down somewhere, but I don't remember. Hey, you want a sandwich? You make a sandwich. which so ramona's like oh well i guess now they're gonna have a party for people who didn't get to go to the wedding it's gonna be called the party of the discards yeah ramona's not into it she's like i'm i'm not into it and you know what i'm with her i think it's insulting well it's also obviously something bravo was like well can we at least have an after party that's true in new york and they're like here we got this room at the bottom of a marriott for five dollars room for you yeah it has three tables with you know some table claws wrapped around them you can you can do that right meanwhile in chinatown bethany's like look at that look it's like an entire octopus like can you believe that it's like a serious it's like seriously an entire octopus and a giant pig you know it's like it's what people eat they just don't see it up close first you know it's like if there was a cow hanging there would people still eat it i don't know have these women never gone to chinatown in all their lives they were i mean they were like look at that it's like chinese letter like it's like a different alphabet it's like it's not even it's not even a different language different alphabet like you can't read it to me it's like scrub scrabble like i like i don't get it like literally go like how do i write skinny girl in it like how do they see my brand do they read my brand do they understand my brand like how do they see the girl in china's like like what is this are we still in america like i don't get it in china they're all skinny so it's just called girl but girls are looked down upon so we actually call it boy it's called boy drink boy

51:12so she's like uh they go to an ice cream parlor yeah they go yeah they go get ice and bethany's like i got a chanel purse for ten dollars and bethany's like yeah it's like everything's a little different here like different little different flavors like vanilla ice cream with sesame seeds and it's like sesame ice cream with like vanilla beans in it like it's everything's a little different here carol She's like, I'll have chocolate, please. And at one point, at one point, Carol goes, what's blueberry lavender? And the girl goes, it's blueberry with a hint of lavender. And Bethany goes, what do you think it was?

51:47I don't know. I thought like blueberry was like Chinese for chocolate. I don't know. What does she say? Can I just have chocolate? The lady gives her chocolate. And Bethany goes, is it good? Is it good? She goes, it's chocolate ice cream. They just suddenly turn into like the most hilarious like old Jewish ladies, you know? So wrong that I got chocolate ice cream? No, it's your life. Live your life. It's your world. So yeah, so I got chocolate. You got your thing. What's the meaning? It says, you know what? We're alive. We have our health. That's all that matters, right? Yeah, you're right. Okay.

52:20All right. That's why my grandmother is. Seriously, I can't go up to the counter and be like, can I have health? Like, they don't do that. But you know, we're grateful to have it. You know, it's not something that's on the menu. That's what I'm saying. I asked for how they gave me What's in the green tea ice cream It's fucking tea It's frozen like ice cream Oh it tastes like chocolate Although I have to say I often think that green tea ice cream Tastes like chocolate so I was with Carol Do you have a sippy cup? So Sonia is Moving stuff in her house With Connor she's like well Where should I move these dresses Where should I move these sparkle dresses From 1983 I mean, I don't want to disrupt the spider that lives there.

53:01But sorry, I just totally talked over you. Sorry, everyone. That's better. No, that's better. Because Sonia never had a secretary job. I'm like, who am I talking about? It doesn't matter because the listeners couldn't tell what either of us were saying because I talked at the same time as you. Chocolate! Chocolate ice cream! So she's moving stuff and she's like, well, you know, he's gone from 11 to 7 to 7-11. She keeps saying that. She's like, well, now he's here all the time, you know. So I figure if he's going to make slushies all day, he might as well have his own room to do it. So me and Connor are moving things.

53:40And I told him, you know, I said, you're on Tinsley's list that I made Tinsley. You know, you should be with her because, you know, you're going to want to have babies. And then he said, well, what's wrong with adoption? and then she falls down on the ground. And then Tinsley walks in and she's like, hey, can I get rid of some of the stuffed animals that are upstairs? I think they're harboring my germs. I can't get rid of this cold. That's really affecting the curls in my hair. They're iconic, you know. I feel like I'm in Lisa Vanderpump's house, she said. Did she say that? That's hilarious. Yeah, she said, I feel like it's Lisa Vanderpump's house.

54:13Every time I open my eyes, there's a fucking animal staring at me. And she's like, your floor is already a wind tunnel. We have moved everything out of there. Except 5 ,000 stuffed animals. Except for all the old Macintosh classics. She's like, how come Frenchie gets to make changes? Because she's like, well, Frenchie doesn't like the dining room table. So we're going to have to move it. And, you know, Frenchie doesn't like the egg station. He wants a better egg station. So we're going to make that work. She's like, but I can't move a stuffed animal. Come on. You've known me for longer than Frenchie.

54:46Come on. Do you want me to call my dad in here? but that is so gonna lecture you hey connor could you bring in the box stop telling connor to bring in your boxes you're distracting him from the very important work of standing here and looking at me connor is thinking about egg stations and egg stations only young lady

55:11bethany shows up to the rec room for this wedding party and she's like what seriously like i'm the only person here it's like me and a waiter and like one other girl i don't know like what is this a minaj like what is this man yeah y 'all want to do it y 'all want to do it you might have to put down the wine tray i'll do it how awkward for that waiter just like bet he and bethany in a rec room in the basement of some place like what i wouldn't know what to do and bethany's just standing there in the corner just just standing there and he's standing there with like 15 wine glasses like some bus is about to stop like you can put down the tray buddy okay now it's time for a cigarette yeah i like i like bethany's attitude because she goes well i did call her a whore i did call her a whore a year ago so this is the station i deserve the aftermath party alone yeah i liked when she did that she's like yeah you know so then um dorinda shows up and uh she's like there's too many celebrations it's like you know it's like those people who celebrate their birthdays for a month but he's like it's like ramadan and dorinda just looks at are like, eh?

56:13You mean Ramona? What? Ramonadon? I don't even want to say that. Ramona Larnedling, John? I was going to look up Ramadam, but I forget. Are you talking about ramekins? I love ramekins. Like, yellow creme brulee? Is that what you're talking about, Bethany? So Luanne and Tom arrive, and they're exhausted, obviously. And Luanne's like, look, can you believe that girls are married? It's me. here I am married to Tom. I'm married, girls. She's like, wow, congratulations. How was it, Tom? He's like, great. As he looks away from her. Yeah. Like, just fucking kill me now. Why am I here? So she, Luven's telling us, I'm just so happy.

56:55I'm so, oh, my partner in life. Oh, it's my partner. You know, I'm married, girls. There was a long line for Tom. And I didn't cut in line. I just got in line.

57:08Oh, my goodness. and then Ramona shows up and she's like it's drab and dreary in here okay I don't like it I don't like it at all sorry guess they ran out of money okay they spent all their money down in Florida and now they got nothing left but this rec room I'm sorry it's not fair she brings Avery and Avery's like hello Bethany I love that little thing on your dress and Bethany's like oh yeah yeah thanks hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi what's the matter what's going on she's like no no I'm Avery Oh, sorry. I thought you were an intern. You want something to drink? Well, actually, I'm looking for some Pellegrino.

57:44It's like water to me. Yeah, it's water to everybody. You want some? Hey, can we get some water? Bubbles? All right, where's the water? Where's the water? What? That's what I call the waiter. Where's the water? Where's the water? Where's the water? Her new assistant. Where's the water? Where's the water? Where's the water? So, um... Bethany, you look marvelous. Ah, thanks. What's the water? Where's the water? Here's the water. Okay, Avery, you're here. Here's the water. the waiters where's the water okay where's the water here's the water so so so tinsley tinsley shows up and she's brought her 23 year old date which i think is first of all it's kind of cute because they went on their first date like six weeks ago so the fact that she's still bringing him around you know it was cute you know she deserves it get it get that get that cute little ass yeah that curler is working hard for you girl yeah and ramona's like look she followed my advice and she got a guy, you know?

58:39But it's like she got a baby. I mean, he's more appropriate for Avery. They are literally the same age. He's 23, she's 22. He probably doesn't even know his chardonnays from his Fabergés.

58:55So Tom's like, oh yeah, this wedding ring is so heavy. My left shoulder is literally lower. It's really hard. And I told Luanne, I don't even want to wear a ring, but she made me. so the woman i am yeah everyone's just looking at him like you are so classless and uh he goes yeah and luann she put her heart and soul into this wedding she just did such a great job with this wedding her whole heart and soul was in there and ramona goes yeah luann could be amazing when she puts her mind to it he's luann didn't even bother flinching at that she's like i don't have the energy to deal with the stupidity right now.

59:38Can you believe it? Can you believe it, girls? We got the yacht. We got the yacht. So then... Seek sale of here. Money can't buy you. Yada, yada, yada. So Dorinda and Ramona jump all over Frenchie because Sonia has bought Frenchie. She's like, look, girls, it's Frenchie. He's like, oh, bonjour, Eggstation. And they're like, oh, yeah, look at him. Oh, that's Frenchie. We've heard of you, but we've never seen you. We didn't know you were real or whatever. And he's like, oh, yes, I am. Yeah, I am. I'm so real. And then they just start jumping all over him. And then Sonia turns to him and right in front of them, she's like, oh, you just I don't even know what to do with myself when you're here because I don't even know what to tell the girls about you because I just said you were Frenchie.

1:00:28Like, I keep you in a cage. Oh, Sonia's like. orgasming all over Frenchie, and everyone's like, ah, that's disgusting. Let's look at cute Chad instead. And then, meanwhile, it's being disgusting. So Carol's there. She has, like, a cute little outfit on, and then John walks by. He's like, hello. You know, uh, I can shrink that down a little bit more for you if you want. It's like a little... Yeah, great party. Yeah, you dress doesn't quite fit. Want me to shrink it for you? yeah he's gross he's wearing like a baseball cap and then there's like a weird moment where tom starts talking about how uh luann is a great cook and carol's like uh really have you seen her cook he's like no she's a great great cook she can make pasta roni like no one else are you sure and luann goes yes i made a pasta

1:01:28i got the recipe from sonya whenever she starts talking like giada you know she's lying yeah i made him a past uh and then and then sonya comes up to luanna tom like oh hi hi and tom tells sonya oh hey like wish you could have been at the wedding i'm like that's really insulting to tell someone that you disinvited i love these women though because they don't hold anything back yeah uh because uh who gives a speech well well before the speech tom kisses luann and when he kisses her he like puts his hand around her neck i was like whoa oh yeah he's like oh that pasta and grabs her neck and kisses her she's like oh it's time to catch the thanksgiving turkey in it tom it's like our own white house tradition already starting i love my new partner well Tom's my new playmate.

1:02:21Playmate of the year, Tom D 'Agostino. So then Dorinda gets up to make a speech and she's like, she gets up and she goes, you know, I love this great wedding. You know, I came out of it feeling so much better about everything. Well, good. I'm glad you felt better. That's what matters. What a great vote of confidence. Personally, I was nostalgic to Dorinda's speech from last year and I have it here since I feel like it's worth revisiting because it's such an amazing speech. Do you want to listen back? It was so good. To blessings, I'm so happy that I am part of this and then you feel like that.

1:03:01You know, not a moment in time, not a moment that happens. Every once in a while, you know, you just know when it's right. And it's right. Thank you. Classic. Not a moment in time, that moment happens. There's no. That's right. You know, I'd like to make a sandwich to cast a cram. Richard. That is my favorite. You know, in a moment in time, a moment happens. That's when a moment happens in a moment in time. Moments in time. Time in moments. I have another audio clip here that says Dorinda slurring. It's four seconds. I don't remember what it is, but I feel like playing it. I feel like it's in the spirit of the episode.

1:03:44The more she does know she's doing better than she knows what she's doing. Yeah, just more Dorinda. Yeah, it's better than what she's doing. What she's doing is better than what she's doing. Hey, we're from the Berkshires. We're people. We're the same people from block. We grew up in this moment times and stuff. And Bethany's like, she's berserk right now. She's just like waving her wine violently. She's like, I was at the beach. I got to go put on a dress. I'm getting guilty. It's a bitch. Not well, bitch. So Tom's like, thanks for that speech. And she goes, hey, Tom, in your speech, how about you say what a speech I gave?

1:04:28And he's like, okay, well, you gave a great speech. You always make it nice. Yes, well, I said that one time he said I made it nice. It's on T-shirts.

1:04:39God bless this cast. And then Tom continues his, Luann, Luann put her heart and soul into that wedding so that we could have our true friends and family there. Yes. Oh, my God. What a douchebag. And she's like, I got to get out of here. Like, what does that make us, huh? And Dorinda yells, yeah, the friends who weren't in violin. Who's so tacky. Yeah, the friends who fucked my husband. I got to go. I got to get out of here.

1:05:08Oh, my God. Tom, he is a piece of work. So, so fun. Well, everyone, thanks for listening. Bye, everyone. Bye, everybody. Bye. Watch What Crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. It's always a party on Alison Block. Our way is the Amber way. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's always automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clap. Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. We never miss her call. It's Diane Call. Sunday in the Park with Dylan Clark. Big yay, it's Emily Gauthier Erin McNicholas, she don't miss no trick-a-less Hava Nagila Weber You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones I go, you go, we all go for Hugo Jamie, she has no last name-y She's our kind of mess, it's Jennifer Messer Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock Kristen the Piston Anderson Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey B Que sera, sera, whatever will be, will Lauren Sills be.

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