#3276 Below Deck Down Under S04E08 Part Two: Honey Badgered

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0:31Ben Mandelker: you guys i have some legendary news for you 20 years after its debut the hbo original comedy series the comeback is finally back i've always loved how the show skewers hollywood and seeing lisa kudrow return as the iconic valerie cherish is exactly what we need right now this season

0:49Ronnie Karam: picks up over a decade later valerie is finally starring in a new show but here's the twist it's being written by AI. She's still navigating the chaos in the industry and chasing those big dreams with that same Valerie Cherish energy we adore.

1:03Ben Mandelker: If you're watching this season, and you really should be, by the way, you've got to check out the official Comeback Podcast. Host Evan Ross Katz is joined by Lisa Kudrow and Michael Patrick King to unpack every episode to dive into the show's origins and why Valerie is still such a relatable, resilient character after two decades.

1:18Ronnie Karam: You'll also hear from cast members like Laura Silverman and Ella Stiller, Plus comedy powerhouses like Abby Jacobson and John Early. For anyone who loves a behind-the-scenes look at how iconic TV is made, this is a must-listen.

1:31Ben Mandelker: Stream the HBO original series The Comeback on HBO Max Sundays at 10.30 p.m. And watch The Comeback podcast on HBO Max or listen wherever you get your podcasts.

2:02Ben Mandelker: Hello and welcome to Watch What Crapens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. This is part two of the recap. If you missed part one, go check out your podcast feed. It's right there. And without further ado, let's get right back into the recap.

2:15Ronnie Karam: So we go to Mike and Jenna and Mike's like, Jenna, who's so cabins? And she goes, why, what's wrong? There was a panty liner sat in the cupboard. You're lying. I swear, I swear to God. I'm like, fuck, I'm traumatised even thinking about it. Imagine it was you. It's like, how much should we not see this? How do we not see it? All right, guys.

2:35Ben Mandelker: All right, guys.

2:36Ronnie Karam: Those cupboards are not being cleaned out properly. All right? Someone is spreading their legs, attaching to the walls, the inside of the cupboards, and then removing themselves, leaving panty liners. We got to be moronet.

2:50Ben Mandelker: It's so embarrassing. Like, that's the worst thing that could possibly be in your cupboard. Well, I think the worst thing would be, like, a dead body, personally. But that's fine. Panty liner's also up there. So Daisy is like, when was the last time you checked the cupboard? It's like, I won't hop it again. They're in charge of four, though. Simple things like those. I don't know. I don't know. How do you miss a panty liner? I know I fucked up. All this Eddie and Alicia bullshit's really been consuming my mind. And I'm really fucking up at my job. Sure. Blame it on them.

3:19Ronnie Karam: Yeah. Well, I mean, he looks at the inside of the closet wall, you know? I mean, I get it. He's a mess. That's a pretty bad one. I mean, it's pretty bad. It's a panty liner. I'm not saying anyone, you know, but still. So Mike cleans up the crew mess, and Daisy's like, Ah, look at you, Mike. This is my dream. This is, like, how I get turned on. He's like, Oh, finally figured it out. Really? I might just take it back after a night out and clean the mess just for you. Won't see me try. Calm down, Mike. It's a figure. It's a turn of phrase. I know. Zip your pants up, Mike. All right, now, honey boobs,

3:55Ben Mandelker: can you run up and grab another bottle of wine, please? Thanks, boo-boo. He really does say boo-boo. And Ellie is like, Oh, God, for fuck's sake, I went through war for this shit. So then Daisy is talking to Jason. So a guest found a panty liner stuck in the wardrobe. He goes, Oh, my God, which is our fault. Because we didn't find it, but I've spoken to them, and I think they've learned their lesson to check. Well, you guys really need to step it up. Yeah, in case they bring it up, I wanted you to know there's a panty liner on the wall in the closet. Pass it on.

4:33Ronnie Karam: Do we have a red onion, sweetie pie? No. No. She's going to kill him. Every time they cut to him, he is just, he is like a gun of just sexist shit. it's like boom boom boom every time they turn to ben he's like oh yeah sugar lips honey bye sweetie mine booboo tulip tongue butter ligament so um now the guests are like playing in the

5:04Ben Mandelker: water slide poor guy falls off before he even gets up to the top of the slide and then um jenna and days you're cleaning the bar and jenna's just saying she's really taking it hard because she actually unlike everyone else uh under daisy seems to actually care about her job and so she's

5:18Ronnie Karam: saying it's just been like a shitty start and well now you know to check the cupboards so the guests dance and record videos by the slide and then um eddie is helping this guest out of the water she's coming out of the water and he's like would you like some help she's like no and then she just keels over and hits her head on the side of the boat and someone goes oh my god are you okay and She goes, no, I died. I had to rewind that like five times. That lady, she's like, no, don't help me. You okay? No.

5:53Ben Mandelker: They're like, Jason checked on her like 10 times. Like, are you sure you don't have a concussion? I'm fine. I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm okay. So now they're getting ready.

6:03Ronnie Karam: Yeah, that's the worst person to get hurt because she does not want people giving her all the attention and they just won't stop. It's like every person on the boat is like, oh, are you okay? She's like, I'm fine. But let me know. Please let me know if you're feeling dizzy. I'm fucking getting out of my room. Are you fine? Are you fine there? I'm fine. Get out of here.

6:20Ben Mandelker: Leave me alone. So now Batool and Alicia are setting up for pride. And Alicia's like, I love pride. I love everything about it. I pride all the time. I could have my own spin. And it'd be great. I'm in my element. I love pride. I'm like, could you have some enthusiasm? She's like.

6:39Ronnie Karam: So it's a nice dinner set up Rainbows everywhere guys Because that's how K's roll And then they're at dinner And an echoey voice is like featuring flamboyancy And straight on C wordiness Ladies and gentlemen We give you Straight from the Tommy Bahama showroom floor Mark the butterfly And Mark comes out And like Butterfly wings with lights all over them And like dances around and he's got like a rainbow dildo stuffed toy that he puts on his head. And they're like, oh my God, this is so gay, I love it.

7:15Ben Mandelker: And so meanwhile, downstairs in the galley, there's, you know, chaos as Ben and Ellie are making dinner and Ellie is like, Daisy, Daisy, Daisy, should we play the first course? Yes, you can play that. So Ellie goes to take food off the stove, but Ben's like, hold on one second. We have to wait for Daisy because I can get cold fast. Lumpy Lumpy clavicle So then the guests are still at dinner Like getting it up and everything So Daisy comes down to get the food And they start to plate it And then Daisy's like waiting Because the food's not ready And Daisy's like Why do I have to be here to watch them starve They wouldn't serve until I'm like I'm coming, it's so annoying

7:54Ronnie Karam: So they finish plating And she's like ready for service She's like we're here Are you sure Daisy Oh for fuck's sake Ben Well, it's muscles and clams They get cold super fast, we have to wait God damn it Okay, well, we've been here fucking fuck Yeah, it's cold super fast Well, then hurry the fuck up then

8:16Ben Mandelker: Daisy is in no mood No mood for this Ali is like, should I serve some plain rice as well If they want fish? For who, hon? For who? For the crew What's that, hon? Sugar pie? Sugar pie? Corn tits

8:33Ronnie Karam: What's that turmeric towels What do you need What do you need there

8:36Ben Mandelker: All these pet names

8:38Ronnie Karam: It needs to stop I can't take it

8:42Ben Mandelker: I couldn't hear you over there Molasses bum Can't hear you Sorry it's really noisy By this fan

8:52Ronnie Karam: Sorry rugula rectum What did you say hon Come on boo boo

8:57Ben Mandelker: What did you say syrup sternum okay okay we no no rice for the fish i hear you okay so they're like uh all right we've got

9:09Ronnie Karam: grilled mahi mahi coming up and one of the guests is like can i just have one mahi i don't want like mahi mahi i just want mahi thanks they're all like

9:20Ben Mandelker: it's a gay table say things like that gay pride means never being ashamed of your mahi mahi jokes

9:30Ronnie Karam: Amen, brother. So the guest finished dinner and Jenna is saying, Eddie, that she'll have Joao clean up the mess. And he's like, well, where is he? And she's like, probably eating ice cream. So we cut to Joao in the galley eating ice cream. I'm like, that's his thing. They just know that every night he's going to be in the galley eating ice cream.

9:52Ben Mandelker: Like a big old industrial size tub of it. It's just like the size of a cauldron. And he's like with his little spoon, and I must get ready for Zim. Zim cream. Zim cream. Zim and Jerry's.

10:10Ben Mandelker: I enjoy my New York super fudge Zim.

10:15Ronnie Karam: 31 Zimlers. So Ellie is like, what is your favorite dessert? Cheesecake. What kind of cheesecake? Lemon meringue. I'll remember that. I will find my way to his heart. Sort of his lemon meringue stomach. Yes. So now the next morning, Mike comes into the galley and he's like, hey, hey there, you got anything for us? And he's like, what, you hungry bastard, are you? I'm starving. Maybe like a little omelet or something. Oh, an omelet. Omelet, fuck off. I don't even do omelets for the guests, mate. I'd like some avocado. And Lisa's like, go, go, go. And she pulls him aside and she's like, just a word of advice.

10:54Ronnie Karam: Don't ever do that again.

10:56Ben Mandelker: What? Do what? Do that. Do it. I don't know. But whatever it is, don't do it. I don't know. Was it something with towels? I wasn't really paying attention. I just got mad all of a sudden. Don't ask for food in the morning. That's what it is. You know, four-day charter, he's absolutely fucked. It's just not a good idea. That's what I'm saying. So now Mike is mad because someone told him not to do something. He's like, Ben, Alicia just had a little chat with us and said, don't you ever do that again? And I said, do what again? And she said, have you asked Ben for breakfast? Just, no, no, no, she meant do your hair like that.

11:27Ben Mandelker: Please stop doing your hair like that. It's driving everyone nuts.

11:30Ronnie Karam: When you do your hair like that, it makes it hard for anyone to eat breakfast, I think is what she's trying to say. He's like, no, no, she was trying to tell me what to do, man. She was trying to tell me what to do. She's like, well, sorry, I wasn't trying to be rude. Alicia, Alicia, Alicia, just please don't ever do that again. All right, don't ever tell us what to do, please. She's like, but I'm just saying it's disrespectful. So if you want to be in the galley, then go. And Ben's like, wait, wait, wait, wait. Did you just scare her off?

11:53Ben Mandelker: she was helping me come on mike's like the first rule of yachting is don't tell me what to do i but i can tell you what not to do which is you're not allowed to tell me what not to do don't you understand the logic of it all which is basically baby my god and then he runs like

12:10Ronnie Karam: to tattletale on alicia and ben's like uh no actually she's correct you shouldn't come in here and order fucking breakfast why are you yelling at her yeah loser he's and then he tells

12:20Ben Mandelker: Don't do that again. He literally says, don't do that again to Alicia. When he got mad at Alicia for saying to him, don't do that again. So then Alicia goes upstairs. So she does her tattling. So she's like, oh, she's stewing. She's like, two stews in one fucking galley. Don't mind me up, Mikey. And she goes up to Daisy and she's like, can you tell me if I'm in the wrong about something? Oh God. Yeah. All right. I'm just going to say, yes, you're in the wrong. No, no, listen. Mike comes up and says, oh, Ben, do you mind making me an omelet? What? What? Yes, thank you. Okay. So nowadays he's mad.

12:55Ben Mandelker: No, I'm crazy. Next time, just come and tell me. People don't ever take that shit well from their peer. Oh, my God. You know, I feel like I'm everyone's mom. But with Alicia and Mike, it feels particularly toxic. I shouldn't have to be dealing with this tit-for-tat. No, it's my toy. It's my toy. I'm not. It's my omelet. I'm not going to give a fuck. Just clean the boat. All you have to do is just clean the boat.

13:16Ronnie Karam: Mike, what's going on here? He's like, well, all the stuff. I was kind of ridiculous. I came in this morning, having a bit of bathtub with Ben. Oh, Ben, fancy whipping us up some breakfast, you know, like we're thinking some omelets or something. Then Alicia pulls up and says, don't ever ask him to do that again. She yelled it like that at me. I was terrified. I was terrified of her. Terrified of her. In what tone? It's not the words. It's the tone is what you're saying. It was the tone. It was the exact tone. Terrifying tone. Terrifying tone to us.

13:43Ben Mandelker: Alicia, I shouldn't have said that to you in that tone, but I'm telling you right now, don't ask the chef for anything, because the chefs don't want to do anything for you unless you are very attracted to them and they want to have sex with you. How do you understand? It's time for a commercial.

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16:47Ronnie Karam: Every style, every home. So Ben comes out, and Eddie, Joao, and Batool are in the mess. And he's like, guys, guys, could you keep it down? They're like, ha, ha, ha, we'll do whatever we want to, Ben. So Daisy radios Ben to sudden breakfast and comes down with Alicia. And she's like, Jenna, if I was you, I'd stay out of the service area. She goes, yeah, I'd stay out of it as well, Jenna.

17:11Ben Mandelker: Jenna, you've been banned from the galley. That's unacceptable. You're allowed in here anytime you want. As for you, you're only allowed here up to five minutes before mealtime, Daisy. Candy coccyx. Daisy's like, oh, oh, really? You have me fucking comp in here until, if you could just say Daisy's Harvest, I'll be here for 30 fucking minutes.

17:35Ronnie Karam: I love that. You can have me living in here if you're good. I love winding Daisy up. I approach her like a holiday sauce. I just wind it up, baby. I just wind it up until it's broken and people are complaining. I blame the assistant. Daisy's like, I can wind you up. Don't you worry. Are we going to fight now, Ben?

17:55Ben Mandelker: You can treat me like a Honda's, but I'm going to treat you like a Newman's own vinaigrette. I'm going to shake the fuck out of you.

18:04Ronnie Karam: Newman's own. Love the specificity.

18:07Ben Mandelker: Very popular with my generation in Ireland. Norman's own.

18:13Ronnie Karam: Norman's own. So Ben checks in on Ellie because she's clearly pissed. You know, it's like, okay, very great. Oh, we make a hollandaise. Oh, great. Now we make hollandaise. So you can tell she's pissed. And he's like, what's going on, my little troublem? You all right there? Honey pie, booby face? And she's like, I'm good. Okay, you are good, baby. You are good there, my little spumoni splanker cronium. All right, you are good. It's like, okay, dishes are done. All right, baby, my little darling monk fruit mandibula. You really got it now, man.

18:49Ben Mandelker: You're killing it, buttercut. Let's just keep on doing what you're doing, apple fritter.

18:57Ronnie Karam: So now we go to Mark talking to his sister, Sophia, out on the deck. And she's like, oh, my God, thank you for bringing me. And I never would have thought I'd be here. You know, I mean, we had such a hard life. And now look at us. You know, I'm so thankful to you and Clay. God, I'm really glad you took that job at Tommy Bahamas. Remember when you were going to work at Gadsuk's? And I said, no, don't do it. It's Tommy Bahama. Now, look, you got a man that looks like the lady from Murder, she wrote. Congratulations. Congratulations. That's why you need to always be nice to Clay. Take care of him.

19:28Ronnie Karam: He's rich.

19:30Ben Mandelker: I was so worried when you brought Clay home once and said, please welcome my very dear friend. And I thought, oh, my God, it's Mike Huckabee. And then you said his name is Clay. And I said, oh, thank God it's not Mike Huckabee. Just take care of him. He's special. So Batool sort of like she Batool sort of is nearby. And Mark's like, sorry, we were just having a moment. My sister didn't know I was gay. She's really not very bright. I mean, you can really show up with butterfly wings only so many times before you give up hope on her. But I think this time it really stuck.

20:01Ronnie Karam: When did you tell her? Did you just tell her this morning? Because I would hope that someone would have said something before last night. I mean, Jesus, you were wearing a dildo on your head, sir.

20:12Ben Mandelker: Matula's like, oh, it's just touching my heart. Also, what did you say? I couldn't understand. It's like, I've been hiding this from her for 16 years. 16 effective years of hiding my homosexuality. And she was like, I already knew you're my little brother. You're also wearing butterfly wings right now. I love you no matter what. It was so wonderful.

20:33Ronnie Karam: So Batul says that she was born in Istanbul and in her country, gay marriage is not only illegal, it's a huge sin. And thankfully yachting helped her get away from there. And when she started working in Europe and traveled, she saw how people are living happily and without strict rules. and she's like, do your thing, be yourself. She's like, I feel happy to be educated about it now. So they hug.

20:56Ben Mandelker: It's nice. Nice little scene. You know what? On the spirit of that lovely little scene, should we carry the positivity under the sea?

21:04Ronnie Karam: Fish report! Fish report! Now it's time for a fish report!

21:12Ronnie Karam: Alright, well this is included because this is those orange flower things under the water. I forget what they're called what are they called i don't know it looks like orange okra all piled together it does and there's like a little fish but i want you to watch the violence that happens here it's like a little pretty striped fish it's all alone it's left the school of fish it's right in the middle of this field of poppies or whatever and then look slowly it explodes come on you can do it oh boom oh no it explodes from the inside and turns into this other fish this yellow fish wow the special that was violent well it was

21:59Ben Mandelker: yes do we need that i would have liked to stay on this fish it's so it's in such a tranquil place it's probably like can someone take a photo of me this would be great on instagram It's like, sorry, we got to go to a different shot now.

22:13Ronnie Karam: Yeah, this fish, I think, yeah, it was like, oh, my God, my school's leaving. But I didn't get my shot in front of this Insta wall. But no, you died. So now we get this other single fish. We've got a lot of fish just on their own today. This little yellow fish. Well, I guess there's other fish. It's got friends, but they're all going.

22:29Ben Mandelker: It's the only one. This one is the only one that's like mugging for the camera. The rest are like not angled towards the camera. but this one's like, get my entire body. This is my good angle. It's my good side.

22:41Ronnie Karam: It's going for this carrot or whatever. I was about to say. It's like, oh, carrot. Don't mind if I do. Like I need a hot dog. I do love a carrot. Going to the hot dog stand. I know we all said that we were going to do my fitness pal together, but I see a hot dog stand. I'm going, I'm going for it. Get back to it, Bernie.

22:56Ben Mandelker: The diet starts tomorrow, and then they're like, oh, my God. Bernie the fish. Always goes for the carrot. Doesn't even realize there's an entire churro above us.

23:07Ronnie Karam: okay now we go to these like tiger shark things or whatever they're called but look at the smile on this one isn't this so cute it's so cute it's like well i heard that

23:18Ben Mandelker: there's no puffer fish this week so i figured i'd be the cute fish of the week throwing my hat in

23:23Ronnie Karam: the ring it's so cute this has the cutest i don't think i've i mean i've seen cartoon sharks maybe that are cute but even then i don't think they're very cute this is like the cutest shark of its Its eyes are right next to its mouth.

23:38Ben Mandelker: It is the sweetest shark. You know that in the shark version of What's Happening, it plays rerun, right? It's always chasing after the truck at the end of the opening credits.

23:47Ronnie Karam: Rerun. Wait a minute. This is his nose? Or his eyes? Are these his nostrils or his eyes?

23:54Ben Mandelker: Oh, you know what I just realized? It's totally its nostrils.

23:59Ronnie Karam: Oh, gross. What an ugly fish. I changed my mind.

24:02Ben Mandelker: it's totally it's nostrils but it's still i can't i can't look at it as anything but eyes it's so cute like nostril eyes and by the way can we like not overlook this gorgeous shark in the foreground with its spots this is a beautiful shark i don't think i've ever seen such a high fashion shark

24:19Ronnie Karam: before it's a lisa renna shark they're like are you wearing your leopard print again jesus christ it's it's 2026 leopard apprentice forever baby

24:32Ben Mandelker: I'm so mad that those are not its eyes I'm sorry I'm going back to the cute shark I'm so mad that those are the nostrils because if those were its eyes it would be just the most adorable shark of all time but now when you can't

24:45Ronnie Karam: now it's hideously ugly when you see that the eyes are up here like holy shit that thing's ugly it's coming right for me it's just got a schnoz

24:53Ben Mandelker: it's not it's actually still pretty cute it's actually still cute it's just not as cute but it's kind of like saying you know what it looks like this when you do this with your hand when you when you do like this the senior winces kind of thing you're like this you know for people who aren't watching who are just listening

25:10Ronnie Karam: i did the senior winces hand puppet thing oh i think it looks like a minivan that has a killer clown you know it's coming to kill you but it has like a happy face on the front and then it starts turning towards you and it's like, I'm going to kill you. It's like, no, you're not cute anymore. Stay face the other way.

25:26Ben Mandelker: I still think it looks incredibly cute. Look at its mouth. It's a cute little mouth. It's got a soft little mouth. Like, hey. Even when you see where the eyes are, it has such a gentle smile. It's just so pleasant. It's having a wonderful day.

25:39Ronnie Karam: It looks kind of like a cow.

25:41Ben Mandelker: Is it on top of another fish?

25:43Ronnie Karam: Yeah, there's another fish under it. Is she giving birth? Yeah, there's other fish under this other one too look you see the little gray fish under there they're long like a little paris you know there

25:53Ben Mandelker: are but here's what's okay so here's what's crazy i know that there's like these there are various fish that just sort of hang out with sharks and they're like they're like they're henchmen you know and then but they like clean up like the parasites on their bodies or whatever but it looks like there's a full-on big fin under the cute shark it almost looks like it has like a napkin under its mouth right yeah like it's it went to the bathroom and it's got like toilet

26:16Ronnie Karam: paper stuck on its foot no one will tell it except it's under its chin it's so obvious yeah there's

26:22Ben Mandelker: like a full-on big fish under this shark that's like an eel that's a full-on eel look at that thing there is something happening that shark is really invading someone else's personal space and

26:32Ronnie Karam: it's turning right with the shark so it looks like it's attached to it somehow what the f is going on

26:37Ben Mandelker: this shark is this shark is in a constantly evolving uh situation here like we're really keep on we really have misassessed it so many times a little shark this little shark shark

26:49Ronnie Karam: works at tommy bahama and this old shark is like oh my god you taught me how to dress i'm taking you with me it's like non-traditional relationship day on fish yeah okay so next up is uh this long this one shows up episode i feel like sometimes they're trying to tell us something because they themed the fish and this one is long fish we see a lot of really really long fish as you'll see is Is this a sardine? What is this?

27:15Ben Mandelker: It looks sort of like a sardine or maybe even an anchovy. And it looks unhappy to be on camera. It's like, I'm not wearing my makeup.

27:24Ronnie Karam: Why the long face is my question.

27:27Ben Mandelker: Where's it going?

27:28Ronnie Karam: It's like someone with all the money in the world, they come in in this beautiful silver dress and they're just like miserable. Their hair is pulled back too tight. It's like, girl, none of your husband's been cheating on you for 30 years. Why are you upset tonight? Just relax, you're rich.

27:42Ben Mandelker: She's embarrassed. She's like, I didn't know cameras would be here. I would have cleaned up this place. Because she's like under this garbage background. It's like this messy gray-green unkempt mound.

27:54Ronnie Karam: I need a vacation. Okay, so then we get some beautiful trees blowing in the wind. And then we get to some little fish, some little basics. This looks like a fish tank.

28:05Ben Mandelker: Mm-hmm. It's giving fish tank, I'm not going to lie. They're small. It's generic. They're not like...

28:11Ronnie Karam: Okay, here we go. long long fish this is has the face of a seahorse but then the body of an eel

28:20Ben Mandelker: yeah i love this fish it's doing something interesting you know i love its snout yeah i think it's not as i've i've seen this fish before i just don't remember what i wish i i wish i knew

28:31Ronnie Karam: my fish more i think it's like a seahorse that learned yoga and so now its posture isn't fucked up and now it's just straight oh my god you're so glamorous finally vodka came to the sea but unfortunately your face still looks exactly like your ass so sorry i am concerned it seems to

28:49Ben Mandelker: be it seems to be drawn to some sort of dark ominous abyss and it's gonna get eaten down there like don't go in there you did all this work on yourself like don't go into the dark hole like this is this is a fish in a horror movie right now like guys i just want to see what's in there

29:02Ronnie Karam: like don't go in there don't go there they always kill the long fish first every time that that is

29:10Ben Mandelker: literally where a predator is hiding what are you thinking and also don't think i don't notice that your butt looks just like your face you literally have a butt face that's what i said your head is

29:19Ronnie Karam: exactly like your ass oh i didn't hear you say that yeah it's the twin face and the butt exactly the same okay so then we come to a turtle doing some kind of yoga look at this back bend the turtle's doing it's like oh yes oh yes the world still sucks hate it up here i'm going back under

29:36Ben Mandelker: bye turtle this is what you get for smoking like it's like i need some air i'm running out of breath i'm running out of breath like honey take better better care of yourself honey just yeah it's like sitting there taking a breath from the uh the top of the waves and now we have

29:54Ronnie Karam: now we get to chef fish chef fish pasty just refusing to do a dish all the other fish have left because he keeps calling them honey and boo-boo the ocean doesn't want this the ocean

30:08Ben Mandelker: like the ocean is not sweeping him out the ocean is trying to put it back out on the beach it

30:12Ronnie Karam: literally is it's pushing him back towards the shore it's like nope nope you call me honey you called me honey one last time bitch get out of me get out of it out okay now we get another leopard print shark this one now has a fish on top of its head look at that the fish is riding his head

30:31Ben Mandelker: and it has its fins out so it's like guess what okay guys uh it's doing shark charades okay um you can use me one word um you can hang a shirt on me um is it hanger yes i was i'm a hanger i am a hanger yes i did i did hang her face yeah stop eating my fucking eye boogers okay we've been dating two days two days we've been dating i love what it's not doing with its fins i mean those

30:58Ronnie Karam: fins are out and proud you know yeah um it's gay day so then we go to the bullied fish the five head the poor five head i'm the only person here that no one will swim with even that big leopard shark has a little fish attached to its eye boogers what do i have a five head but five head is also

31:20Ben Mandelker: kind of like oh my god oh my god oh my god it's a shark oh god please please let it not see me oh Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh, I shouldn't have been here. I shouldn't be here right now.

31:28Ronnie Karam: I can't even get eaten by a shark. Whatever.

31:32Ben Mandelker: By the way, there's no urgency with those other fish. There's literally a giant ass shark that's looming and they're all just swimming. Like it's just a normal day and at fish town. And they're like, not even concerned. I mean, maybe that says something about the shark, but like you guys should be concerned that there's a predator nearby. Right? No, they don't care.

31:53Ronnie Karam: It's like me. Like if you know that I'm hungry in a grocery store, the groceries should be afraid. But if I'm not hungry, you're safe. Maybe they just can't tell. Maybe. So then we go to some little basics. There's little tiny basics. And then we go to the churros. And another long fish. I love this long fish with the horn nose.

32:12Ben Mandelker: Yeah, this one's great. This is like a Cirque du Soleil fish. Like all the other fish are gathered around. They're like, guys, it's so whimsical and beautiful. How can I even do that? And there's like music playing that's like.

32:32Ronnie Karam: it's like balancing on its nose on top of a churro wow how does it do that how does it do that this is like the michelangelo of fish paintings it's just like touching its nose to the the

32:45Ben Mandelker: finger of the churro god it's like and then one other fish that some fish in the audience has the other one well you know a lot of these fish were in the olympics they were gymnasts and this is what they do when they're done oh i didn't know that it's not really that impressive they've been learning it since they were two you could probably do it if you were learning since you're two too

33:02Ronnie Karam: so like don't get like that excited okay then we go to this little fish who's so cute it's just like standing on a twig singing look at him sing he's like pop pop pop its eyes are very like a

33:17Ben Mandelker: video game right like this is i feel like when they make fish in video games their eyes look like that and it's very unsteady camera work i'd also like to point out oh look but tools dancing to the fish's song

33:30Ronnie Karam: pack that shit up pack that shit up and then we go to we go to a pair of stingrays really cute couple they are that annoying couple who dresses the same and then they like when you walk that watch them speed walking they're exactly in step look at this yeah and they're going to brunch but

33:48Ben Mandelker: they're not going to eat anything because they're watching their figure they're like we're both in

33:52Ronnie Karam: athleta we're both walking the exact same way we're the best couple in the neighborhood basically

33:59Ben Mandelker: we'll split the croissant yeah we're trying to get into shape we're just trying to hold each

34:02Ronnie Karam: other accountable then we go over here to a polka dot fish who also has a friend really a big day

34:13Ben Mandelker: for polka dots isn't that a friend there that little blue is that oh you're right no yeah

34:19Ronnie Karam: Is it a fish or is it a fin?

34:22Ben Mandelker: It is a little fish. It's a little buddy. It's gossiping. It's like, by the way, did you hear about the Cirque du Soleil performance? Apparently the fish fell over. It was so embarrassing. And they were gymnasts, they were too, and they still couldn't even do it. I'm like, honestly embarrassed.

34:33Ronnie Karam: By the way, that five head fish couldn't even get eaten by a shark. What a loser.

34:38Ben Mandelker: Someone said that I should swim with a five head shark. I was like, excuse me, I have standards. I may be very small, but I do have standards.

34:43Ronnie Karam: Did you see that other fish that had his face that was the same as his butt? Oh my God. Problems coming up. You are not going. I'm telling you that right now.

34:50Ben Mandelker: Did you see that that shark added like fake eyeballs to its nose to make itself look cuter? It's like, we know. We know you're not cute. Like, stop painting on your abs.

34:59Ronnie Karam: And that's it. Fish report. Fish report. That has been the fish report.

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37:57Ben Mandelker: Lisa.com promo code CRAPPINS. My fish of the week is still that cute shark. I still thought the shark was cute, even after where I saw where his eyeballs were.

38:07Ronnie Karam: I like the little one on the twig singing. I thought that was pretty cute.

38:10Ben Mandelker: That was good, too.

38:11Ronnie Karam: Okay, so let's get to one of the guests tells Mike they don't have toilet paper in their room. Mike's like, why give me old eyes instead of focusing on what you're going to do? You're not my boss. If you want to do something done, you do it instead. Things would probably be sad. All right, get the toilet paper yourself, dad.

38:32Ben Mandelker: So Mike goes to Daisy and Jenna And tells them about the toilet paper And Daisy's like Guys, who did the cabins? From now on when we're turning those cabins around Come and please put the full roll in those cabins And I want those under the sinks Okay, toilet paper under sinks Panty liners off of walls Okay, it's as simple as that

38:52Ronnie Karam: So now we go to the galley And Ben's like Oh, hello there, cheesy chicken You wanna do some cheese balls? Come on, let's do some cheese bowls, chick-a-tits. She's like, oh, should we sharpen this cheese knife at all? And he's like, well, do you want me to? She goes, maybe. Okay, well, yeah, I'll sharpen the cheese knife, fine. Okay, well, do you want to choose a board to do charcuterie on? Um, okay, well, we'll see, all right? We'll just figure it out as it comes. Ah, well, that black one would help a lot. I'm going to change. You change into your blocks, right? And he's like, okay, whatever you want.

39:24Ronnie Karam: Yes, we're going to change into our blocks because we are doing things properly. Okay, boo-boo.

39:31Ben Mandelker: Yes, let's keep the momentum going and I'll be right back. So she goes to change into her blacks. I love this for her, honestly. I do like that she is sort of being proactive. I understand how it can be an overstep considering that she's the sous chef and he is the chef, but he's also a disorganized chef. And so I think this is like, I don't know, I'm okay with it. So now she comes back. She's like, okay, you want to go change? because they want us looking cohesive. And he's like, I got it, honey. Honey tits. Sugar sneakers. Bumble caps. I just need to get this shit done, all right? And I'll see you in five.

40:11Ronnie Karam: I'm trying to choose my battles wisely, but she just has this sort of bravado about her. Like, she's my boss. Like, I just want her to chill, you know? Like, why can't you just chill? so um now ben is changing in the cabin with joao and he's like it's just a really weird resonance in the kitchen you know i mean it's just weird it makes me fucking nervous i don't know what's going on in there so now we go and she's finishing up the charcuterie board what were you gonna say i was like it's so weird in there the way she proposed that you use a black cutting board or

40:46Ben Mandelker: how she said oh we should sharpen our charcuterie knives it's weird you know her energy is weird

40:51Ronnie Karam: because she's so sick of him and she's not really telling him what's up so he's like trying to tip toe around but it's making him like say boo-boo or something more he's getting nervous and more boo-boos are coming out and she's getting more and more pissed and he doesn't understand what's going on it's you it's your personality it's making her fucking crazy well he's about to find

41:15Ben Mandelker: out because uh he's back and she's finishing the charcuterie board he goes all right let's speed that up love if we can it's like okay five minutes and copy copy okay we have no gas up but i'll let you know when they appear okay no gas up and he goes all right let's wrap it up and put it in the

41:33Ronnie Karam: fridge darling oh yes i will please sugar lumps yes yes i will all right all right okay xylitol

41:42Ben Mandelker: zygote oh god oh my god xylitol zygote okay snappy sinuses so she's like okay we gotta take a breath What? What? I've been to water, salt, vegetables for milk. It's getting a little too intense in here. We got to take a little breather. I know, but dinner's in half an hour. Pokey retinas. So...

42:11Ronnie Karam: We've got a ton to do, alright? Alright, listen here, honey. We've got a ton to do. Well, I could have prioritized differently if I had none. Well, what? Like moved quicker? What do you mean? Sorry, babe. I've just been... Oh, Ben, the way you spoke to me, I cannot handle it. He's like, spoke to you by doing what? The way you spoke to me right now. I'm not going to have that ever again, Ben. You hear me?

42:32Ben Mandelker: How did I speak to you?

42:34Ronnie Karam: No, I will never have it again, Ben.

42:36Ben Mandelker: Trickle face?

42:37Ronnie Karam: No, don't you, don't you. Don't you. What kind of face?

42:41Ben Mandelker: Trickle face?

42:42Ronnie Karam: Don't you trickle face me again. Never, ever, ever again.

42:48Ben Mandelker: Hold on, before I rant, I need to make sure I know exactly what I'm ranting about. Trick-of-face. Okay, got it. Don't you ever call me trick-of-face again.

42:56Ronnie Karam: How did I speak to you, Tic-Tac-Titties? First of all, do not call me Tic-Tac-Titties, okay? And don't call me honey, because my name is Elena. My name is Elena or Ellie. I'm not honey, I'm not bunny, I'm not anything. I'm not Spumonis, Planktochromaneum, whatever that is. I don't even know what that is.

43:15Ben Mandelker: Sounds great, Dewey Dentrils.

43:18Ronnie Karam: Oh, don't, see, no, okay, don't ever speak to me like that ever again.

43:22Ben Mandelker: But what did I do? How do I speak to you? Could you just tell me?

43:27Ronnie Karam: No, you're supposed to be an awful man, awful. Wow. Oh, you need to get your head in the game. You need to get this organized. This is your job. You get us organized and we'll get this shit down. And what is this list? Let's go. Don't fucking try me, Ben. Do not fucking try me, Ben.

43:44Ben Mandelker: And he's just like, uh, peeled potatoes and great parmesan cheese, which I mentioned earlier say didn't I say we need to grate this Parmesan cheese didn't I say

43:57Ronnie Karam: that oh really don't you try this Parmesan cheese pussy with me motherfucker no I was saying you literally need to grate the Parmesan cheese oh don't even try it you are like an emotional anchor around the galley the galley team's neck and you're dragging the galley team's neck and you're driving the galley team!

44:17Ben Mandelker: When you were telling me earlier, you know, hey, can you change into your chef jacket? Oh, thank you. Yes, cause you need it to! Cause we need to get our shit together! We wear black weird team, okay? And we cannot look like fucking clowns! We do not sell vegetables looking like clowns! Do you want milk or not?

44:35Ronnie Karam: Well, getting into my chef jacket is not gonna improve the quality of the dinner, honey pie! Well, I'm not sorry! I'm not sorry! Sorry, not sorry! How do you like that? Well, I didn't realize that you were the chief chef, Oozy Earlobes.

44:52Ben Mandelker: Oh, well, we need to get our shit together, okay?

44:57Ronnie Karam: Alright, Anis Incles, well, we need to get in a better mood, don't we, honey pie? Well, I need to be in a better mood? Are you fucking kidding me? Are you fucking kidding me? I had bombs drop on my head. And he said, can we try not to get into arguments before dinner service, please? You started it.

45:15Ben Mandelker: so Ben's like okay so you're a little bit more sensitive than we once thought that's fine no I'm

45:20Ronnie Karam: not sensitive don't turn this on me I'm disrespectful I'm going to the captain and I don't give a fuck wait a minute saccharine scapula come back and she's like I'm going so she's like storming upstairs and Alicia's like um maybe you should go the other way since the guests are there she's like oh shut up she just passes her and she goes up to the captain who's just standing there with no energy just blinking blankly, like staring at a wall. And it's like, Captain, what just happened in the gully? It is unacceptable!

45:50Ben Mandelker: It's like, oh, hello there, velvet ventricles. Wasn't expecting to see you here.

45:56Ronnie Karam: Sit on Daddy's lap and tell me a story. Why don't you? Wow, that escalated. Wow, we're both in olive green today. Look at us. I just noticed. Yeah, yeah, exactly. That escalated quickly. I think that is just a lot of frustration built up that it didn't even take much because he wasn't acting that different he's just at it he wasn't

46:17Ben Mandelker: he wasn't but she i think i can imagine she probably she was frustrated by all the pet names she probably still felt disrespected like lingering disrespect even after the conversation from him and maybe she was like annoyed that she didn't say the thing that she was supposed to that she wanted to say and i don't know like she clearly she had it she said earlier like when

46:40Ronnie Karam: They had that conversation. She was like, well, you know, we had the conversation and I still need to talk to him about the pet names. But baby steps like I can. It's that was already one. I don't want, you know, chefs are such babies. I don't want to add too much onto that. And I want to make him flip his lid. And then she flips her lid. Oh, it was great. That's crazy. I thought I was going to be more 100 percent on her side because this baby honey shit has been making me crazy the whole season. but I think she just kind of flipped. I don't know. She chose like a weird time to just flip, I think.

47:16Ronnie Karam: Yeah,

47:16Ben Mandelker: I think it was still very fun to watch. Yeah, I think I'd still like on her side. But yeah, I thought it was going to be on the crux of something. I thought it'd be a reaction to something more dramatic. And it was just like, can you hurry up with a charcuterie? It was like, that's where it happened. but also like how many times that that's like we all want our big explosions to happen like in the most meaningful best times and they almost always come tumbling out off of some stupid random shit and then you feel like an idiot because it's like i just asked you to hurry up with the charcuterie babe it's like you want your god now i went through war yeah it happens all the time

48:01Ronnie Karam: on housewives where someone was like okay that is it i'm gonna let them have it and then it's the day that that the housewife decides to be nice to you it's like hello welcome to my home oh really

48:10Ben Mandelker: go fuck yourself yeah like whoa where'd that you've hyped yourself up the next time he disrespects me and you're kind of like waiting for the big one the big one you're cashing your ticket and some stupid shit and you're like whatever i'm doing it yeah i'm going in yeah yes fun times fun times

48:30Ronnie Karam: You know, we were just talking at the beginning of the episode about Margaret and Jersey and like, well, don't put them in a corner. Don't paint them into a corner and say like it's him or it's Teresa or me, you know, and I feel like that's kind of how the episode ended. Right. Because it's like, well, this is I'm at my wit's end. So what's going to happen? Because he's not going to fire Ben.

48:50Ben Mandelker: I think Jason's just going to give them a stern talking to like, find a way. We're a team. Make it work. You have to understand, Ben, this is not her role. she's still learning and Ellie you have to understand there's a hierarchy and we can all work here together and get back to it alright I'm going to look at my goldfish again yeah I'm going back to my fish tank going to work on my sandalwood

49:11Ronnie Karam: alright well there you go there you have it

49:13Ben Mandelker: there you have it it was a good time appreciate everyone for being here and catch us later this week with all sorts of other recaps including what is being billed as the worst Kyle Cook episode of all time of summer house so can't wait to watch that okay bye everyone bye watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors ain't no thing like alison king our way is the amber way it's the foster and the furious it's amanda foster it's always automatic with ashley auto put your hands together for carly clap get on the right foot with chrissy offutt she's not just a

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50:01Ben Mandelker: She don't miss no trick-a-less.

50:03Ronnie Karam: Hava Nagila Weber.

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50:13Ronnie Karam: Sips some scotch with Jessica Trotch.

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50:37Ben Mandelker: Aren't you glad it's Marianne Arns?

50:40Ronnie Karam: Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg.

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51:04Ben Mandelker: Can I have a Kavanaugh? It's Anna Kavanaugh. Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD.

51:10Ronnie Karam: We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O 'Neill. Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Hogle your horses, it's Christine Hogle Don't get salty with Christine Pepper Can't have a meal without the Emily sides

51:25Ben Mandelker: Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall We got our wish, it's Jen Plish My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo

51:35Ronnie Karam: She's a total knockout, it's Katie Manok

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51:52Ronnie Karam: The Incredible Edible Matthews Sisters She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud She's our princess, it's Rebecca Prince

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52:21Ronnie Karam: She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar. We love you guys.

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