#3603 The Golden Life S1E3: Life Is a Caba-rage

0:00Ben Mandelker: A few years ago, I bought a house. It was very exciting. And it also was like a great time for me to get some life insurance. You sort of don't realize, but these big life moments that you have where you buy your first house or do whatever, those are really times you should be reflecting on getting things like life insurance to ensure future for your loved ones.

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0:55Ben Mandelker: application times may vary rates may vary trust pilot rating as of august 1st 2026 this episode is sponsored by ernesta and i have to make a confession confess my dining room has had no rug for two years because every time i'm about to buy one i panic that the color is wrong and i've watched housewives renovate entire mansions with more confidence than i have picking

1:18Ronnie Karam: a rug mine's the wrong size it's floating in the middle of the room like a lily pad

1:22Ben Mandelker: Buh. That's what the samples are for. Five oversized 12x12 squares for$10 so you can see color on your own floor, in your own light, at full scale, instead of on a screen. Plus, a$50 credit toward any rug.

1:34Ronnie Karam: And the rug is custom-sized, cut to the inch for your exact space, in over 200 styles, delivered in as little as two weeks. Bye, Lillipad!

1:42Ben Mandelker: Visit Ernesta.com and order five samples for only$10 and you'll get$50 toward any rug of your choice. That's E-R-N-E-S-T-A dot com.

1:53Ronnie Karam: I give it one week before Ben's arranging those samples like a reunion seating chart. That's what I say.

2:12Ben Mandelker: What happens when there's so much that happens?

2:42Ben Mandelker: of this recording you will see me start to go like this so um yeah we are side by side we are in philadelphia we have a big show tomorrow night here we just had a lovely dinner date together um my mouth is now completely dry as i we had just bread on bread on bread on bread and it was fabulous and we cannot wait for our big philly show tomorrow in case you didn't hear we are recapping roni which is why you're hearing the golden life first and then on uh saturday night we're going to recap Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. And then we'll also, that's going to be in D.C. And then we'll have our Orange County reunion recap up in between.

3:20Ben Mandelker: So everything's a little bit out of order. So thanks for bearing with us. We can't wait. If you want to get tickets to these shows, go to watchrecrappens.com. And there's also a million other shows that we are going to be doing. Then next week we go to Dallas and Austin. and then after that we have nashville and tampa tampa area fort lauderdale that's we're going to close out our year and then uh next year we just hit the ground running san francisco denver all these places ending in the uh with the golden crappies on february 25th so come join us for that that was pretty good i didn't bring up the list well we've recited it so many times i'm getting pretty good about memorizing the order but i do know that in the new year we're going all over the place including two stops in canada so exciting all right well let's head over to some golden five guy there is a sort of a hilarious irony that here we are our first recap that we're doing since election day in america and we're going to the land of mar-a-lago after a giant blue wave of winds across the country but hey you know what we'll take it

4:32Ronnie Karam: uh you know it's good to be going to someplace when you can have a like ha ha kind of attitude instead of oh come on you know now at least we can be like ha ha mar-a-lago yeah that's right that's right uh so here we go golden life season one episode three with the story list this show feels like it's been on 20 years i feel like this season because it has been

4:59Ben Mandelker: on forever these ladies it is so interesting they really do have all this history that they've built up and the way they all interact and everything and um we start up in uh at elizabetta's where they were having lunch last week and um we sort of like have like a like a running start to the fights what are you doing to the screen ronnie by the way ronnie is changing all the windows while i'm trying i'm trying to be professional and be like I know newscasters can be, oh, by the way, if you listen to this in time, we're going to be on the local filling news tomorrow. Let me see what the station is.

5:36Ben Mandelker: But if you have time to watch us, I'm going to pull up what show we're going to be on. Wait, Bravo announced two new shows. Yeah.

5:45Ronnie Karam: Well, look at that. Okay. Let's see. It pays to be slacking off on your phone. Oh, by the way, no.

5:51Ben Mandelker: This was from 10 days ago. Never mind. It was from Bravo. Oh, I hate when that. Stupid algorithm. That wasn't nice of you. I hate when he does that. It's like crazy. I get mad about things that happened a week ago. You know? I know.

6:04Ronnie Karam: I'm like, how dare you?

6:06Ben Mandelker: I will find the Philly news stuff, but you just started with a recap. There are Elizabethas. Wait.

6:13Ronnie Karam: What are you? Oh, you're looking up the news? By the time this comes out, the news is going to be over. It's already line 40. People may hear it tonight.

6:19Ben Mandelker: People may hear it tonight.

6:20Ronnie Karam: I ain't going to be on Philadelphia 17. And it was great. Thanks for having us, Philadelphia 17.

6:26Ben Mandelker: We're in Positively Philly. okay well positively they know my music um so they're yeah so this show feels like it's been on

6:33Ronnie Karam: a really long time this season and i'm really enjoying it but i thought god it's the exact it really is the same thing just with some brighter colors they just put on different clothes but they're still doing the same old thing i mean it's really just sonia still crying about you called me a slut yeah i do think that that um if they get another season let's give them

6:54Ben Mandelker: some better lighting in their confessionals it's pretty rough and i think like you know they're they're these are our ladies and they deserve to have more flattering lighting i'm just gonna say that as a general note because it's like you know come on but i didn't notice what's wrong with the lighting it just it's just not as flattering you're seeing like a lot of you see a lot of everything and of course that's just what life is but i just feel like these ladies you know they are they're heroes in many ways and they deserve you know it's like you know it's the

7:23Ronnie Karam: reason why we do it don't take that but that's what would they need you know to maybe just

7:27Ben Mandelker: brighten it I don't know is that what you're saying we have a we have a um Ronnie has a blinding light on the laptop so I cast a tissue over it to diffuse the light a little bit and so when he when he removes the tissue veil it's like yeah but that's everybody knows that you know if

7:43Ronnie Karam: you feel like you don't look great just brighten brighten the light I mean I don't know I think they look great though I don't know what they look great they look great but I'm saying the lighting could be better that's my notes I think maybe it's the bright clothes it's maybe maybe

7:56Ben Mandelker: maybe it's not there it's a contrasting different yeah so anyway they're still on skin so this episode we sort of like have like a running start from the way the last episode ended which is that like everything had settled down and then Kelly makes this like like this comment to the when like oh you know son is not listening this is this is what she you know I told her that she's doing this with her boyfriend. She's not listening. And then Sonya hears it and she loses her mind.

8:21Ronnie Karam: Yes. Fuck you, Kelly. So we get a retread of that with Sonya having a fit at Kelly now because Kelly is kind of on the way, which I'm with Sonya. I mean, what the hell? I'm the only who's shooting with you and who can stand you. And then the second you get around everyone else, you're like, oh, yeah, Sonya is kind of crazy. I mean, is it true? Yes. But Kelly, you're also kelly bent's amount yeah also i did love sonya's line i need to get a mocktail and in the meantime shut the fuck up it's a great line and of course one thing we haven't talked about is that on the

8:57Ben Mandelker: golden life they do not bleep out the curses they let them all out there which is great and so kelly is like no no no no you do not get to talk to me that way Like Kelly, stop talking to her like a dog

9:14Ronnie Karam: that just like peed on the wall. That's how Kelly talks to everybody though. And she's like, Sonia, please don't speak like that. You're a lady. Please don't say the F word. Whoa, where are you? What show do you think you're on?

9:27Ben Mandelker: Yeah. So Sonia's like, I know I have Kelly sharing things that I gave to her in confidence. And that's not to be shared with Luann until I feel I wanna share it with her so I can deliver it the way I wanna deliver it, even though I did just deliver it earlier in the same episode. I just broke my trust. And like, you know, wow, like second to the land, like we, you know, we shall see because I have been enjoying my time with Kelly, but like that just like really hurt me.

9:51Ronnie Karam: So Sonia, you know, what everybody, what every sober person does when they're stressed out, she goes to the bar for a non-alcoholic drink. I'm not buying it. No. But I don't know that it's alcohol, but whatever is going on with Sonia, share. Because it's something. Share. Puff, puff, give. So she goes to the bar and Luann comes up. Oh, well, by the way, we got Dorinda's new tagline for the season, which is, I gotta go do my radio show. Sorry. Sorry, can't be here. I gotta go do my radio show.

10:21Ben Mandelker: Gotta talk to Kiki Monique. Okay. So Luann's like, listen, you and Kelly, I don't even know what happened there. I was like, you know, it's done. You know, what the hell? You know, when you got up and you were very upset, I was waiting for Kelly to say, oh, you know, Sonia loves Lu and nothing can come between them. Not even a guy. She wasn't even standing up for me.

10:37Ronnie Karam: Of course Sonia has no one in her corner. I mean, the fact that Sonia is now complaining to the person she was just fighting with, she's like, that's not fair, is it? I just don't like the way she talks. And Lou's like, all right, listen, I don't even want that. You know, she was upset for me, though, Sonia. All right, so I'll just give her a break there. I'm not going to stick up for you when she was standing up for me.

10:57Ben Mandelker: You know, my stomach is just so upset. It's like I'm most upset about, you know, Kelly talking to Lou. You know, it's just it's hard. So Kelly's like, well, I'm because Kelly is now there. She's like, well, I'm upset with you for using the F word. Don't do that. You're Lady Morgan. No, no, you do not say that. Lady Morgan does not say that to me. No, no, no.

11:20Ronnie Karam: I like that Sonia is just like, I can't. Just let me calm down. I don't want to talk about this here. Like, give me a break. Now you're going to chastise me about my cursing? It's Sonia. It's like she's flashing her private parts all over the place and everybody. She doesn't care. her so Kelly that's that's also the thing with being nice to the person that everybody no one no one likes Kelly for a reason and it's sad when that's the only person on your side for

11:47Ben Mandelker: so yeah yeah so Sonia's like I just need to calm down and she's like you know you can have all the time you want I don't I don't care if you get mad at me just do not swear don't tell me what to do she's like well I'm I'm going to tell you what to do and specifically I'm gonna say no do not Swear at me. No.

12:05Ronnie Karam: I don't want her to talk about my boyfriend. That was something personal. I'll tell Luanne about my boyfriend when I want to talk about my boyfriend. Oh, Sonia. So Ramona's like, you know what? Just look sick of boy. Like, can we just say goodbye? And Avery's like, you know what? I'm gonna say goodbye also, okay? We can both say goodbye, okay? Avery's sitting there rolling her eyes and being like, eh, I never. Please, the Queen of the Men. You're Ramona Singer's daughter. Stop. I can't. This is mine. Come on, please. She acts like this, mother.

12:41Ben Mandelker: You know what? This is very confusing to them. Because what they're seeing is me saying that my daughter and I are leaving. But what they're seeing is my mother, a daughter, calling their mother their daughter. But the mother looks like the daughter. And the daughter looks like the mother. And they're very confused. Okay? Because I look young. You look old, Avery.

13:04Ronnie Karam: I just want to say goodbye, but everybody keeps saying bye to Avery because she's so old. They just keep saying, you know what? Go to a slide, Avery. Go to a slide. I'm so funny. She's even younger than me. How do I look so good? I do nothing. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial.

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13:41Ronnie Karam: Quince focuses on high-quality staples made with premium materials like 100 % Mongolian cashmere, 14-karat gold, and Italian leather. All timeless, versatile pieces that feel special to unwrap and become everyday favorites long after the holidays.

13:56Ben Mandelker: Ronnie, I just got two fabulous button-down shirts from Quince. One was their famous, you know, Mongolian cashmere that everyone always knows about with Quince. And you can also see me wearing it on our YouTube show, What's Your Order?, which I do an episode with Kempire. And I'm wearing my Quince shirt, and I love it.

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14:26Ben Mandelker: Give the gift of quality this holiday season. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers or go to quince.com. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK, too. And when Quince asks where you heard about them, let them know it was, watch what crap happens. It's the best way to support the show.

14:44Ronnie Karam: I'm sick of things stressing me out. The other day I was running late and nearly ran over an armadillo. I felt so bad.

14:50Ben Mandelker: I'll tell you about stress. Imagine performing a cabaret 10 times a week.

14:55Ronnie Karam: Or learning a 17th language like French Peruvian. Bon Gisissimo.

15:01Ben Mandelker: This is why I watch so much TV. And Amazon Prime definitely comes in handy.

15:05Ronnie Karam: It's a great way to shift your mood.

15:07Ben Mandelker: Yeah, but everyone's always like recommending a million shows. Like you got to watch this, you got to watch that. I'm at a point where I don't say what do I have to watch. Now I'm all about how do I want to feel.

15:17Ronnie Karam: Yeah, the feeling I chase is dark and moody. That's why I go towards crime shows.

15:21Ben Mandelker: I'm a comedy girly. I will rewatch the same comedy over and over again because it's so comforting to me. Or actually, sometimes it's actually sports. There are times where I don't even care about the teams. I just like being part of a live event, especially with some snacks.

15:34Ronnie Karam: Snacks are a part of the feeling. I love a cracker.

15:36Ben Mandelker: So here's where I'm all about Prime. You can have your shows, your movies, your sports, but you also get fast shipping on the things we like to have when we watch stuff, like the perfect snack, conveniently delivered right to your door for a recap-worthy watch session.

15:52Ronnie Karam: That's how Prime gives us the power to just not find the feeling we crave, but also to let us experience it to the fullest.

15:58Ben Mandelker: I'm having 30 to 40 positive feelings. Wow!

16:01Ronnie Karam: Shows you can't wait for, deliveries you don't wait for. From streaming to fast shipping, it's on Prime.

16:07Ben Mandelker: This episode is sponsored by Ernesta, and I have to make a confession.

16:12Ronnie Karam: Confess!

16:13Ben Mandelker: My dining room has had no rug for two years, because every time I'm about to buy one, I panic that the color's wrong. And I've watched Housewives renovate entire mansions with more confidence than I have picking a rug.

16:25Ronnie Karam: Mine's the wrong size. It's floating in the middle of the room like a lily pad.

16:29Ben Mandelker: That's what the samples are for. five oversized 12 by 12 squares for$10 so you can see color on your own floor, in your own light, at full scale, instead of on a screen, plus a$50 credit toward any rug.

16:40Ronnie Karam: And the rug is custom sized cut to the inch for your exact space in over 200 styles delivered in as little as two weeks. Bye, Lilypad.

16:49Ben Mandelker: Visit Ernesta.com and order five samples for only$10 and you'll get$50 toward any rug of your choice. That's E-R-N-E-S-T-A dot com.

16:59Ronnie Karam: I give it one week before Ben's arranging those samples like a reunion seating chart. That's what I say.

17:06Ben Mandelker: So anyway, Kelly and Sonia, they're fine ultimately. And, you know, Kelly, Sonia's just like, you know, you were just fanning it. You were fanning it. You were fanning it. And Kelly's confused what the word fanning means in this context.

17:17Ronnie Karam: I don't know what fanning is, but I like whatever. It's like, you know, the flames. You fan the flames? She's like, why would you do that?

17:24Ben Mandelker: Why did you light anything on fire? She's like, okay, you know what? We're going to go. So now we go to Luanne, and she's home in her apartment. It seems like Luanne and Dorinda are staying in the same building because they have the same apartment layout. And also, like, Luanne goes up to Dorinda's apartment in a moment. And so she's with the gays, and she's like, you know, since the OG cast stopped filming, I've gone on to do many things. But where I really am thriving, I should say, some of the things I've done, I went to the middle of the country and caught a fish with my bare hands. I did that.

17:56I went to Mexico and I sang a song with a strange man with a guitar.

18:00Ben Mandelker: And then after that, I played some ping pong somewhere. I don't remember. It was a drunken haze. But the point is, I'm doing a lot.

18:06Ronnie Karam: This is crazy. You know, my career is everywhere. But the most important thing is cabaret. I'm doing a lot of things. Writing books. I took a walk the other day. That was fun. And she's like, all right, what are we packing, Roger? and he's like you want to wear long cootie or short cootie it's your option short cootie

18:26Ben Mandelker: got my last show in fort lauderdale gotta show the cooch off so anyway uh let's have a flashback i'm sorry i scrolled that i'm having a i'm having a flashback so last week i had lunch and i had lunch with ramona and dorinda here's a flashback to what our lunch looked like i'm basically

18:44Ronnie Karam: dorinda-ing ben as this scene goes on luann just starts talking and dorinda just starts scrolling through the notes like all right all right all right luann all right so it's just when luann's just talking to her gaze right now and basically she invited um she wants dorinda to moderate her cabaret which is hilarious because like you don't she's never gonna let you talk anyway right and so she's like okay here's what we gotta do all right you know by the way the You're the only one coming. You and Kelly Benson, Mom. I mean, what? Ramona and Sonya are going to go do something for the internet with Bethany?

19:23Ronnie Karam: I mean, come on.

19:24Ben Mandelker: So Ramona's like, well, I have to fly to New York. Because we'd see a flashback of Ramona and saying why she can't be there for this. She goes, you know what? I've got to fly to New York because I'm doing a promo for Rock. And so is Sonya. We're doing it with Bethany. I'm like, what does that mean you're doing a promo for Rock? Doing a promo for Rock? Are you promoting rock music? Are you just, is there just a rock somewhere? Like, whoa, look at this rock. Yeah, it's a rock.

19:48Ronnie Karam: You want to buy it? Messy me. Then he was like, I don't do rock anymore. I need a mic too. Maybe it was for the wrestler slash actor rock.

19:57Ben Mandelker: It's probably not even rock. It's probably a typo or reading. I was like, that's a rock. Moana. No, she did say that. I went back, I listened to it like five times. I had no idea what she said. You know what?

20:04Ronnie Karam: We have to go. We're doing a promo for a rock.

20:08Ben Mandelker: which literally is literally for like the son of sodom hussein it's a new vacation walk don't run to tehran oh wait that's a rant whoa you know calling all the hot mamas there's a baghdad for you to visit it's a promo for iraq

20:32Ben Mandelker: Yo, you're gonna go from Saddam Hussein to Happy Hussein because you go to Iraq. Hi, this is Ramona Singer promoting Iraq. Damn darn Hussein, okay? What's a sad damn Hussein? Who wait and see what's on the horizon for you when you go to Iraq?

20:48Ronnie Karam: Like, don't be so sad. You know what? Don't be sad ham, okay? Be Happy Puckalroni.

20:58Ben Mandelker: who's seen you're saying because you chose a wreck as a destination i'm your ramona singer promoting a wreck as a vacation really you're gonna make my show you're gonna miss my show

21:07Ronnie Karam: to go make some cash i mean all right but with bethany more people and at one point the producer is like uh how are you with bethany what's your status with her she's like

21:20Ben Mandelker: so then uh so now luann's talking to roger about like what should we pack what merch and everything and now luann gives us her inside the actor studio spiel about her cabaret and she goes well when i started cabaret i started what i thought was what people wanted to see which is carol burnett mixed up with share meets saturday night live meets starbucks but also going to the library, also a sidewalk or as they called in Philadelphia, pavement, all these things mixed into one and maybe a little B-52s, a little Tina Turner, a little Frankie Avalon, little Debbie Gibson.

21:54Ronnie Karam: Just the fact that she is bringing up every icon in the world. You know, I mean, it's basically Ben Muddler, Cher, Dolly Parton. That's what I am. I mean, mixed with Carol Burnett, mixed with I Love Lucy. Okay.

22:09Ben Mandelker: All right. Let's calm down a little bit. and when she said i started what i thought people wanted to see it sort of implies that she's going to say but actually this is what it turned into and said she's just like yeah i did carol brunette and share uh i'm like which part was the carol brunette part which did you did you tug your ear

22:27Ronnie Karam: at some point which part was which part was the share i'm a comedian i mean both her and sonia do that today they're like yeah when you're a comedian sonia thinks you have to give people grace you That's what you do. We make jokes. I'm Jackie Gleason, basically.

22:42Ben Mandelker: Listen, if Bob Mackie designed for them, I'm putting it into the show, okay? Carol Burnett, Cher, SNL, NLS, In Living Color, all those shows, all into one. Mad TV.

22:54Ronnie Karam: She would. She fucking would.

22:57Ben Mandelker: You can do what you want to do in living. Right. Color.

23:05Ronnie Karam: So, yeah. So, you know, I'm going to be wearing Giovanni. And listen, I'll never forget when I was wrongfully arrested 10 years ago at the colony. Where's the hotel here? The guy is crazy because the policeman who arrested me was falsely arresting a lot of people. I mean, he went to prison himself, actually. So, I mean, it was me. Your real Netflix documentary. What was that Stephen Avery? What is this? What is this bullshit?

23:32Ben Mandelker: Yeah, instead of to catch a murderer, it's to catch someone who holds up in their hotel room. To catch a share-durer. To catch a Barbra Streisand-durer. To catch someone in a room. No.

23:45Ronnie Karam: Just to remind you what Luanne was arrested for. She got wasted in the hotel, hooked up with a dude, walked into the wrong room, started banging the guy on the bed in the wrong room. Then the police were called. Then she locked herself in the bathroom, cursed the police out. Then they dragged her out of there, put her in handcuffs. She threatened to kill the cops and then slipped out of her handcuffs.

24:11Ben Mandelker: Still the craziest part is how she got out of handcuffs. Like since when does that happen? Like she's like, I'll kill you all. It was such an amazing - Threatened to kill them. It was so amazing. I still remember waking up. It was a Christmas. Wasn't it like Christmas? It was right, like right, or New Year's.

24:26Ronnie Karam: I mean, for gay as it was.

24:27Ben Mandelker: And I just remember, like, opening up and being like, oh, my God. And it's like, oh, my God, Katas Luan got arrested. It was just such an amazing time in our lives. It really was.

24:36Ronnie Karam: I'm glad you had fun. But guess what? False arrest. All right.

24:41Ben Mandelker: By the way, I think something that we sort of just glossed over, which is such a funny concept, that Luan's talking about doing a cabaret. And, of course, Durinda will be the moderator. I was like, do cabarets have moderators? That's real Liza.

25:00Liza, when you started making a style that you were copying me ahead of time, how did that feel knowing that you took my style and made it your own and then went back in time to the 70s?

25:13Ronnie Karam: How did it feel stealing my hair in 1970? I wasn't even born yet, probably.

25:20Ben Mandelker: Okay, so then they're looking at the merch and everything and Luann's, Roger's like, oh my God, I love this. Look at this t-shirt. You're serving Cut Fitness. Serving Cut Fitness S which makes it's funnier if you don't change it to Cut Fitness and Roger, they're basically saying it's like their number one selling t-shirt and Luann,

25:41Ronnie Karam: that's so funny. So they unpacked this shirt with her mugshot on it and Luann's like, oh, I just love it. Have you never seen this shirt before?

25:49Ben Mandelker: It's her poster. It's a new poster.

25:51Ronnie Karam: You know, I really want Dorinda to be my moderator. All right, so I need to talk to Dorinda. Because, you know, who better than Dorinda, right? I mean, she's a very serious radio show host.

26:02Ben Mandelker: So she goes downstairs, because they're living in sitcom now. She goes downstairs to Dorinda's apartment, which looks exactly the same. And so she says, So what I did was I put together a show called The Luniverse Show so I don't have to travel with a band. who needs live music anyway am i right anyway i come out to i come out to chic you know when i say chic when i'm talking about chic that's short for chic c 'est la vie anyway i come out to chic you know the whole ladies and gentlemen this is the countess speaking blah blah blah 10 minutes sam's inning ovation people say is that share and i say no it says like carol burnett i say no they says that bet midler i say come on we gotta do a show roses are thrown in my face maybe a pair of

26:41Ronnie Karam: underwear yada yada yada judy and then you say it's both of them rolled into one both of them

26:49Ben Mandelker: wish and then that's when tilda calls in and i say excuse me during i'm talking to an actual famous friend we talked for 40 minutes and then when we're done i come back to the show

27:01Ronnie Karam: all right so i don't know if you've ever heard but i do this thing called a cabaret and dorinda's just think, uh-huh, okay. And Dorinda's in this new, like, I'm peaceful, Dorinda. I don't yell at people. This is what he likes to talk to my friends. I'm a very patient person. And it is just pushing Dorinda over the edge. And Luan doesn't stop. She just goes on and on. All right. And so then for this section, all right, I want you to ask me this question. Who did you really sleep with the pirate? Who really slept with the pirate?

27:31Ben Mandelker: You know, this is fun. You know, this is, you know, it's a fun show but there's also structure structure but fun fun truck it's like a slide you go you climb up it you go down and you have fun and then you look and you say wow i just went down to structure

27:44Ronnie Karam: that's the luniverse i mean listen it's not like the store structure in the mall where you wonder where you pass by and say is this still open it's one of those where you say are those columns real is this ancient rome this is amazing this is or it's never gonna go away so then i say i sing

28:02Ben Mandelker: Chic C 'est La Vie for the fourth time. And then after that, I was thinking also maybe we'd do some girl code, you know, girl code, girl code, you know, cabaret, cabaret, cabaret, more girl code. It's the only way they can see the video, by the way. I scrubbed it from the internet. You can always see it at the live show. It's exclusive. All right, all right.

28:17Ronnie Karam: Listen, I'm trying to make it nice, you know. I'm trying to just let it go on. I got this. I'm on the radio. All right? I know exactly what I'm doing.

28:29Ben Mandelker: You're going to tell me how else to show. Well, I'm sure she'll knock it out of the park, but it's work. It's a show. Speaking of parks, I am trying to work on doing a live free show in Central Park West. Yeah, it'll be great, but she's basically ignored me. I mean, what's that about? I really want to show off. I want the show to go off without a hitch. She's not even paying attention to me. Me, I got a race talk.

28:52Ronnie Karam: Dorinda is going to kill her. She's like, all right, I got to go. I'm going to kill her. I got to go. She's like, all right, well, I'm going to take the rest of this wine then. or I hope you don't mind Dorin.

29:02Ben Mandelker: And she takes both glasses of wine. She pours. By the way, the whole thing going throughout the scene is that like first Luanne's trying to open up this rosé and she can't do it. And Dorinda's just watching her like, is this fucking bitch if I can open up this rosé? And she's like, yeah, let me open it. No, I've got it. And then just finally like Dorinda just takes it. It's like, I'm going to open up the rosé. And then Luanne walks off with all the booze. Yep.

29:22Ronnie Karam: Not to be with Fose, which was one of my other great hits. You can find that wherever you find your nothing. All right. Well, Dorinda. Is that Pardles or James? That's what people say to me.

29:36Ben Mandelker: Luann, your scene is over now. It's my scene now because I'm going shopping with Dorinda. Walking around Palm Beach. And now we're going to have lunch at a place called Pistache. Which you may think means it's short for pistachio. But it's short for mustache. Which would have been funny if I didn't say mustache before pistachio. Okay. You know what? Before pistachios, people used to use slang.

30:02Ronnie Karam: If you know pistachios really well, you just say, hey, pistachios.

30:08Ben Mandelker: Pistachios. It's the new cool slang. On the beach, everyone goes to pistachios. If anyone who's with anyone goes to pistachios, okay? I'm sorry, but that's just how pistachios works. You know what? Someone wrote Peanut.

30:25Ronnie Karam: And I said, what? Who's even Peanut? Okay. We don't even know her. We just know Fancy Nuts. Pistachio. Sick. Get out, Peanut.

30:33Ben Mandelker: You know what? That's why to this day I won't ever pay with cash. Because then people will think I'm going to cash. I'm like, no. I'm not going to cash. I want to go to pistachio. I'll pay you by Apple pistachio.

30:47Ronnie Karam: Sick. You know what? People think they're so fancy. They go to a restaurant, they just try and put their pistachio on a little credit card reader. That's it.

30:57Ben Mandelker: So you have to do. You know what makes me think of the hottest restaurant of last year? It was called Hazel. But no one goes to Hazel anymore. We only go to pistachio. Okay? We didn't call it Hazel.

31:08Ronnie Karam: People in the milk called it Hayes. Well, I hear there's a new one opening up called Peek. What's that?

31:16Ben Mandelker: Peek-an, okay?

31:17Ronnie Karam: Oh God, I'm so dumb. Listen, you know what? I'm gonna go eat at a new place called Walm.

31:25Ben Mandelker: Walm is delicious, but I have to say of all the places to go to, I have to say my favorite is Walm. Walm is wonderful. Macadame. That's it. No, I don't like the service at Macadame, okay? Sorry, I'm sorry, but I will not go to Macadame.

31:45Ronnie Karam: There's too many suitable addicts about it. I don't like it. It's too hard to say. What do I say? Ah! All right, so Dorinda and Dorinda are shopping around. And Dorinda's kind of depressed, and she's like, see, you know what? It's been very special two months. I've been together. It's so magical. But it's sick. We haven't been together in a lot in the past couple of years. You know, I'm not in this routine yet here. I really, I don't know.

32:14Ben Mandelker: I miss, you know, I miss going around. I miss going to Maxime's. Whoa, I don't know that. What's a Maxime nut? Yeah, there's no nuts. It's just Maxime's. Yeah, I miss it. So basically, Dorinda, I think Dorinda being around these women is getting, feeling nostalgic to the good old days in New York City. And now she's like, oh, I just spent my time up at Bluestone or I go down to the city, but it's not the same. No one's there anymore. And she's just like sad.

32:36Ronnie Karam: Well, she said at one point, you know, this is feeling all very performative. She's like, we've known each other for years, but every scene I'm in, it's like, I'm going to Luann's to like, listen, show me t-shirts and talk about her cabaret. And I'm going to you and all you're doing is taking us on boats to meet friends that own shops that you're probably getting discounts from. So she's a little performative, you know, just me self-winship, but you're on a TV show. And then we find out later that Dorinda refuses to shoot with Roger.

33:04Ben Mandelker: Roger is my Roger is kind of like what day Medna was the Medna's like psychic like midge or something like that like that's where Roger is just getting just getting I mean a shout

33:17Ronnie Karam: upon every time so funny that she's not performative I'm not gonna shoot with that person

33:22Ben Mandelker: okay so Ramona's like you know what I'll help you find yourself in a better way how about that she's like I knew you'd understand you know what I'm gonna find you too like I still

33:32Ronnie Karam: I don't want you to be dritta, just better.

33:34Ben Mandelker: And dress better, wear brighter clothes. And sentimental. Wait, can we talk about Sonya? I think the people she really only cares about in the group are you and the win. Honestly.

33:44Ronnie Karam: Mm-mm. You know, I don't, I don't know. I'm team Sonya. I'm not going to talk bad about Sonya.

33:49Ben Mandelker: Yeah, she's never been overly communicative with me anyway. I just don't think that she's like, she's that type. Like if I text you, you text me right back. Because like, you know her like, you know, but she's just like...

34:01Ronnie Karam: You know what, Ramona? I'm James Stater. I thought about it. I don't think Sonya likes me. Really? Why wouldn't Sonya like you? That is crazy. That is crazy. And I wish that we could cut to the Bravo clips of Dorinda just being like, you slut. You a fucking dumb guy.

34:22Ben Mandelker: You want to put an easy pass in your house and do it?

34:27Ronnie Karam: She's like, I don't know. I think she might not like me.

34:32Ben Mandelker: But yeah, they always all come together. There's always someone who's on the outs. So Ramona's like, you know what? Maybe just seeing a one-on-one is a smart move to make, okay? So it's sort of like when you see Avery, you see her one on 12. One for each wrinkle she has in her face. You know what? It's like Avery. One going on 100. Whoa. When you see me, you don't get to see me one-on-one. You see me one on 50 because I got 50 girlfriends.

34:57Ronnie Karam: It's like Avery. One on, whoa, that's one old lady.

35:03Ben Mandelker: Okay, can you just focus for a second here? It's like, whoa, you know what? We're a crazy crew. Yeah, we're close, you know? Well, you know what? We don't know about Sonya and Luanne, but maybe they slept together one time.

35:14Ronnie Karam: Well, because during the same, the only thing we haven't done is sleep together. She's like, well, you don't know about Sonya and Luanne. All right, so then we go to Sonya's, and Kelly comes over. So this is the first time we get a full Sonya reveal. well look at that look at that you said kelly someone and then just falls the balls also point

35:34Ben Mandelker: out the fact that we flew across the country we ate food and then like we're podcasting so i'm

35:40Ronnie Karam: allowed to yawn no you're allowed to it's funny because i'm so used to looking at you through the screen we have to occasionally check in like this and the second i look at you you're like i was like i just got cozy i mean my effect on people right well this was a this was a dull scene but um but

35:56Ben Mandelker: We did get to see Sonia's two-bedroom, and it's sort of interesting. She is, like, downsized. It sort of has that. I'm not making enough noise in the room. I need to start dragging things across. Ronnie's, like, moving an arm around for some reason with his foot. So Sonia's saying how she's feeling lighter. But she goes, you know, sometimes I don't even leave my place for 10 days. There's no place I'd rather be than just with a strange collection of items that I wasn't able to sell off in the estate sale. So Kelly comes over, and she goes, Oh, this is a cute apartment. It's very cozy and super cute.

36:28Ben Mandelker: Okay, so do you want to hear the good news?

36:29Ronnie Karam: Because Kelly is there to give her interior design deck. Oh, yeah, because Kelly's a real pro. I don't know if you guys have seen Kelly's real estate listings, but they're hilarious. It's just Kelly going into the different rooms of the apartment she's selling, standing in them taking pictures of herself. It's like, look at this Eden kitchen. She's like, hi. So, yeah, Sonia's getting taste advice from Kelly. But Sonia's stuff in the apartment, she's not getting rid of that stuff. That's everything that she didn't have to sell from the, you know, they call it the foreclosure.

37:01Ben Mandelker: Well, what's it? State sale. State sale. State sale, yeah. So Kelly is like, okay, you want to hear the good news? The good news is that this house is amazing. Okay, this is your hangout. Over here, this is your hangout area. You need like a better rug. And then these are like really gorgeous pillows. But you can't have them. It's too much. And basically, this actually plays as a shithole. But it's amazing. But a shithole.

37:22Ronnie Karam: so I'm sorry to say the opening but I just thought of this but it opens with Sonia standing in her kitchen and she's eating something because she's going to put out snacks she's like I can't serve

37:32Ben Mandelker: this it's moldy and then she just keeps moldy cheese she's like I can't I can't show or berries or something she's like I can't give it these are moldy and she just keeps on eating them

37:41Ronnie Karam: eating them so they're talking about downsizing and Kelly's like she shouldn't be embarrassed of this because everyone in Palm Beach has downsized. So now we start talking about Ramona, how Ramona is going to do this. Do you have to print up? Oh no, Sonia. Sonia's like, oh yeah, we're going to do this photo shoot with a very popular magazine called Beauty Affair. I don't remember why I didn't even put you on the group text, Kelly. I know. I remember. Yeah, I forgot. It's dramatic, Kelly, but it's just so funny. Kelly's still the only one who will shoot with Sonia. So Sonia has to like pretend she's not mad at her after she's just excluded her from basically the Vanity Fair shoot.

38:24Ben Mandelker: Yeah. So Sonia is saying that they're doing this photo shoot, but then she and Ramona have to skedaddle out of there to shoot a skincare campaign. She goes, it's Bethany's campaign. And Kelly's like, she goes, she's like, I would never have her as a brand ambassador. She's just an awful human. and she's an awful person. Kelly just hates Bethany so deeply and so profoundly. That's just like my favorite thing. Ronnie just brought up a picture of Bethany and her goggles at Burning Man. And she's like, whoa, Burning Man, look at me, I'm a burner now, look at me. I'm like, you can call me Hannah, because I'm a burner, whoa.

38:59Ben Mandelker: Like why are they Burning Man? I'm not even showing the audience,

39:03Ronnie Karam: I'm just showing you because I have it on my desktop to cheer me up whenever. Oh, there I am. I just put up this picture of Bethany and her goggles. I think it's so fucking funny.

39:13Ben Mandelker: I'm a burning man. Burning man. This is the death of burning man is Bethany Franco going. I went.

39:17Ronnie Karam: I went. What's got here, Derek? It's crazy. You know what they need to do around here? Clean it. It's crazy. They need to burn this place because it's disgusting. Yeah.

39:28Ben Mandelker: Okay. You're living the golden life. I'm living the dirty mud life. Anyway. So yeah, Kelly has this visceral reaction about Bethany. And then Kelly realizes, oh, maybe the reason why I really didn't like you cursing at me is that it just reminded me of when Bethany cursed at me on Scary Island. And I like on this show, they don't even bother to explain what the hell Scary Island is. If you've never watched the show, you're like, what is Scary Island? Yeah.

39:51Ronnie Karam: And Sonya's like, that's you. That's your trauma. That's your trauma speaking. It's like, yeah, Scary Island was like crazy. Like Bethany should not be allowed to talk to people like that. And now I just like, no, I have memories. And I say, no, you were also completely batshit crazy that i mean just you're on like something like completely methed out of your mind when sonya went to her room i was like it smells like cat pee in here she's like sonya just come in oh come on so um they're talking through their fight because sonya is just gonna pretend this never happened right and kelly's like you know we're really bothered you know it's oh sorry scary y 'all and uh so please don't do that because i was traumatizing and she's like you know what But okay, now I need to talk.

40:33Ronnie Karam: So why don't I get on this couch and I'll be the patient and you be the doctor. Okay, this is the thing. You were taking her side. Why were you taking her side over my side? Yeah.

40:43Ben Mandelker: And Kelly's like, no, well, don't do that. Don't do that. Whatever.

40:47Ronnie Karam: I don't know what it is. Kelly's like, oh, I'm sorry. It's a lot of Kelly bling on. Kelly and Sonia fake making up. And Sonia's like, you know, I don't like that. But you know what? I will say that I won't say STFU anymore. And Kelly's like, please don't. You're a lady. And there's one thing that I can not stand, and that is ladies not acting like ladies. All right.

41:10Ben Mandelker: Yeah, and so then they're like joking about making love or whatever, and Sonya's like, I mean, imagine if someone tried to scissor Luann. She'd be like, what the fuck is this shit, right? Luann would be like, what? What's going on? And Kelly's like, yeah, I don't really feel like talking about sex on a Tuesday, but like, it's fine. And they're like, do you even know what scissoring is? She's like, I do.

41:30Ronnie Karam: Yes, I do. I just don't want to talk about it. Well, she says she doesn't, I think. She's like, no, like the only scissors I would use are like, I don't even want to like cut things with scissors. Like, do you know what it is? She's like, um. She goes, no. Yeah, I don't. I don't know, guys. Do you think she really doesn't know what's sistering? I don't know. I think she thought.

41:51Ben Mandelker: Well, I think she thought, but then she was wondering if like maybe they were saying there's another meaning to it. She was definitely having an Elizabeth Holmes moment. I don't think I knew that. But you have to watch that so we can talk about it. Yeah. Commercials. Here comes one right now. This episode is sponsored by Ernesta. And I have to make a confession.

42:16Ronnie Karam: Confess.

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42:28Ronnie Karam: Mine's the wrong size. It's floating in the middle of the room like a lily pad.

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44:27Ronnie Karam: I don't know but I don't know about that movie I don't know why it's already on my nerves I think because I didn't see it right before I didn't see it right when it came out and so now everybody's like Oh my god It's like the most busy movie I've ever seen you that changed the way that we look at film

44:41Ben Mandelker: Alright Hey there you can see everything Okay, I'm gonna go meet with Sonya at the spa this afternoon. You can see my hair because I'm gonna get a scalp mustache I think Sonya really is an owner and at least you know what it what I see if I be in the paper You know like you know what I mean? It's about that like really hoping that we could just like have her and I just some time to connect and catch up with two ladies Rubbing our scalps giving each other weird looks while we talk is there any place better to do it in a spa?

45:07Ronnie Karam: Dorinda comes into the spa and she's like, all right, listen, how do you say the name of this place? Beauty Ambassador Day Day? Beauty Ambassador. She's like, oh, all right. You know what? I just want to shoot this thing where there's me and then there's someone that says, fire extinguisher, big arrow pointing to a fire extinguisher. Like every sign is saying Dorinda is about to fucking lose her mind. I cannot believe she's kept it together for this many episodes. They're really pushing with Dorinda. They are. and looks like next week she's gonna she's gonna snap gonna finally lose she actually almost quotes Bethany with that you take a shot at me you bet you know what if you take one shot at me you better be successful because this person Tammy I didn't get this right trying to read it was very close to a real house

45:59Ben Mandelker: with the Cheshire tagline which is you want to mess with Magali you don't mess with Magali. Don't mess with Magali. You want to mess with Magali? You don't mess with Magali. Magali's Magali.

46:11Ronnie Karam: All right, you know what I really want? A scalp massage. Wait, Sonia. Yeah, I'm going to just stop with that, Sonia. They're like, okay. Because Sonia's late. So, of course.

46:20Ben Mandelker: Dorinda's like, okay, I got nothing to do but to talk to these ladies at Beauty Ambassaba Dabba Day.

46:27Ronnie Karam: 45 minutes late. This is crazy. So, she's getting her scalp massage. And And you know what, look, tad insult to injury. You come in, someone's getting your scalp massage, you're an hour late, you come in and then you're like, what she started without me, supposed to be a joint beauty thing. Oh my God.

46:44Ben Mandelker: There's gotta be a part of Dorinda that's thinking, you're gonna be mad at me. You're gonna say that I'm keeping money out of your mouth, the food out of your mouth. I'm taking money from you. I was the one that called in at the 11th hour to replace Jill Zarin. Without me, you wouldn't even have a TV show. And you're going to actually complain to me when I saved your ass.

47:04Ronnie Karam: Yeah, but Dorinda's staying peaceful and saying, hey, Sonia, you know, I'm glad you got here. Guess what? I bought you a palm. And she's like, oh yeah, I missed Good Friday.

47:14Ben Mandelker: Yeah, I think Chris, boom. I love that these ladies are bragging each other like palm. Oh, palm. I mean, didn't Dorinda, who did Dorinda bring? Did Dorinda bring Luann to the church or something? She brought Bethany to the church. She brought someone to a church. She's like, really pretty now. So Dorinda's like, okay, here's your palm. Okay, okay, stop masturbating with the palm. That's not appropriate. I want to say something.

47:36Ronnie Karam: It's a palm frang, not a palm fondle, right?

47:40Ben Mandelker: I want to say something that I was thinking about. I don't feel like, I don't feel like you're close to me. Oh, yeah, well, I know you're a solid person. No matter what happens, if you need to vent, she will be there. Dorinda will be there. And, you know, you do your research. You show up. You always show up. She's like, okay, Sam, yeah, come on. Yeah, well, okay. well i do my research on everything that's true but i love i love when you don't know something like that michael's married do you know that the muslim luan's guy michael's married you didn't

48:08Ronnie Karam: know that did you so ham-handed i mean for christ's sake the woman hates you like you cannot spread the gossip to her like she's a but she does kind of fall for it she's like wait a minute yeah we like stop talking like this michael is not me stop it luan met michael with his wife who was a big fan of Luann. Huge of truth. That shit is hilarious. Yes. That Luann literally fucked a fan's husband. That would be amazing. That'd be amazing. It's more Luann lore.

48:38Ben Mandelker: So Dorinda's like, are you 100 % sure about this? Cause you know, I'm research. Cause you know, I get my people on it. Cause I don't think he's married. She goes, well, I mean, obviously I want it to work out, which is why I went on TV and announced this behind her back. Stop.

48:53Ronnie Karam: Stop. And Sonya goes, I'm going to ask the virtual assistant, Sue. Sue, is Michael married? Can't you be more specific?

49:05Ben Mandelker: And Dorinda's like...

49:06Ronnie Karam: Michael married.

49:07Ben Mandelker: So Dorinda's getting really annoyed. And this is also sidetracking Dorinda from what she's really there to talk about. And Sonya is like, you know, now when you were upset with me and you texted me, my show is supposed to be no videos, no cameras, right? I know that that's what... So Sonya thinks that's what this is going to be about. Because Sonya's called Dorinda Unfuckableness. And everyone's like, oh, yeah, well, that was terrible what you said. That was terrible.

49:28Ronnie Karam: You can't be mad at that. I don't allow photos. So that was illegal that you even heard it. So basically, you know what? At the beginning of my show, it says, FBI warning, if you are watching this without paying, we're going to find you. So I'm going to find whoever that was. This is an 80s porn. All right, Sonia. For Christ's sake, that was terrible. You called me unfuckable. I didn't mean anything by it. that just meant people try to fuck you, but you won't fuck them because you're unfuckable. And I said, that's a lot worse. Right?

49:57Ben Mandelker: Well, you know, you can't say that, so Dorenda's like, yeah, there's a big jump of unfuckable to that, you know? And you know it. She's like, well, you can't say that at my private show. I can't say you're unfuckable when you said those things about me. It's like, oh, so you do know that it was bad to say that because you're just saying, you're saying you're set at retaliation.

50:15Ronnie Karam: Yeah, it's like, well, the thing she said about me on TV, and Dorinda's like, that is ancient history, Sonia. Well, when did she call you unfuckable, though? Yeah. I mean, isn't it all, like, how ancient is it allowed to be? You know?

50:27Ben Mandelker: Well, you said I was fucking around in San Tropez on my husband. And you were. I was not. My husband, as you know, he had a car accident, and he was in a coma. And I remember that because I had the best climax of my life with a soccer player from Nigeria while he was there in the hospital bed.

50:44Ronnie Karam: I remember just like yesterday. I'll never forget that he was in a coma because I never came a harder. Yeah, did you see what I mean? No, I never cheated on him. That is absolutely a lie. How could you?

50:56Ben Mandelker: This is ancient history. I can't do this. It's ancient history. Well, I never said anything about Richard. It's like, I don't want to talk about Richard. I don't want to do that.

51:04Ronnie Karam: You talk about Richard all the time. You know what? Sadly, you live in the past, Sonia. You live in the past.

51:11Ben Mandelker: Well, you know what? I'm still upset. My husband just died. Oh, your husband. Oh my God. Like, your husband. Okay.

51:17Ronnie Karam: Listen, these ladies do not back down either. She's like, listen, Sonia's ex-husband, Cass. And you know what? That man does have a widow. At least not her.

51:30Ben Mandelker: They were divorced and he's been married to someone else for years and years and years. There is a widow out there and her name is Mrs. Morgan.

51:37Ronnie Karam: And I feel terrible for her. All right. And she's like, I have to teach him to walk, to eat, to speak. She's like, oh my God, Sonia, Sonia, you divorced her before all that? I mean, Sonia's just in her own mind. But I love that Dorinda doesn't even care. Dorinda starts off the scene like, you know, something is mentally wrong with Sonia. She's something's very unstable with Sonia. I'm very worried about Sonia. And then she's just like, she'll kick her off. She's damn, she doesn't care.

52:05Ben Mandelker: But she's also completely sidetracked from what she's there to do, which is to say, I feel like you don't like me and we need to connect. And instead, she's just like, she's trying to show reality to Sonya and that's not going to work. Like reality is gone.

52:17Ronnie Karam: Yeah, but she's also saying, Sonya, I feel like you don't like me. And then Sonya's like, here's why I don't like you. And it's like, you can't say that. That's ancient past. Statue of limitations. She refuses to apologize. She's like, I didn't even get child support. I didn't even get to force alimony. You didn't even care about me. She's like, you know what, Sonya, she's putting her hands on her head. She's like, you need help, Sonya. You need help. Please get some help, Sonya. I can't.

52:42Ben Mandelker: Oh, it doesn't take a genius to understand that I would be upset with Dorinda when she doesn't invite me to her home in the Berkshires while filming our TV show in New York. And I've said it one million times. And Dorinda's like, oh, God, I have no desire to talk about things from 10 years ago. All I know is I don't care to remember. And somewhere in here, Dorinda says, I've apologized for it so many times, a million times, which sort of implies that, like, oh, my God. This is not the first time Sonya's brought this up. And Dorinda thought this was buried, that they hashed it out, there was apologies, but Sonya keeps bringing it up over and over and over again.

53:18Ronnie Karam: Sonya's just going to keep on the same circle. That's what she does. It's Sonya. You need to back away, you know, just back away from Sonya.

53:27Ben Mandelker: Yeah, I got to do my radio show. I got to do my radio show.

53:29Ronnie Karam: You got to do my radio show. Put me down the coffee cup. I got to do my radio show. Okay.

53:34Ben Mandelker: Well, how do we really feel about each other? She goes, I love you. Well, I love you too, you idiot. You're a fucking idiot, okay? I love you too. Fuck you. Bye.

53:42Ronnie Karam: Yeah, I just. Okay. So now we go to the photo shoot. Is this the photo shoot? Well, Dorinda's still saying she's kind of depressed. She's like, I just, I can't do this. You know, it's the same thing over and over again. You know, it's not going to get anywhere. Okay. So now it's the day of Sonia's photo shoot. So Dorinda, of course, keeps showing up on time. Would you think you would learn your lesson with this crew?

54:02Ben Mandelker: Yeah.

54:03Ronnie Karam: Why are you, no one is going to show up on time. Just give yourself an hour.

54:06Ben Mandelker: Yeah, exactly. So we meet this woman, Lindsay, who's the magazine editor. And she says that she wants everyone ready by 930. And Sonia is, you know, Sonia is reminding them, like, we got a flight. We've got a huge, huge, huge paid campaign for a French skincare line. We can't miss our flight to New York. So now, you know what? It's a French skincare line called Iraq. Whoa, stylist. Lindsay, Lindsay. So Lindsay is like, Lindsay, I'm sorry, Lindsay is the one who is running it, but there's also a stylist. So she's like, whoa, Lindsay, whoa, what am I wearing? I'm wearing a self-addressed cage. She's like, yeah, no, yeah, we're going to film that.

54:43Ben Mandelker: She's so rude. She's like, Lindsay, I'm concentrating. What am I supposed to wear? You're ridiculous. Lindsay, Lindsay. So then Luann shows up and like Ramona is getting her hair done, but then the stylist is next to her and the stylist is also getting her hair done. And Ramona goes, yo, excuse me, why are you getting your hair done? You're not in the photo shoot. Hello? Why are you getting your hair done? You're not in the photo shoot. She's like, well, they were just, I'm getting it done because.

55:09Ronnie Karam: I'm waiting. Like the one was here. So I got my hair done. Lady, what the hell are you doing? I cannot believe she sat down in that chair. And then she'll figure it out. Ramona is so rude, but she's not really.

55:19Ben Mandelker: She is 100 % right. She's 100 % right, which is what I think I said this last week or two weeks ago. What's so funny about watching Ramona on this show is that she is totally obnoxious, but she's kind of saying the thing that we're saying and there's like something kind of like amazing about seeing her be like no get out of the chair you have to get out of the chair no no get out of the what are you doing here like and she looks at the cap the best part is the way she looks at the camera like i'm not crazy she's looking at the camera like i've been cancelled 10 million times but the truth is i'm seeing things where they are right now they're literally

55:50Ronnie Karam: doing a photo shoot and people are there to get her hair done and the freaking hair stylist is just sitting there getting her hair done. And Luann is standing waiting. Luann's waiting.

55:57Ben Mandelker: Cause if you want to think if she's just, oh I'm getting my hair done while I wait for people. But then Luann's there and this woman's not like, oh shit, she's just like, uh-huh, yeah, yeah. Is that banging at us? Was that a bang upstairs? I don't know. Wait, what time is it? It's 1024, there was a thump.

56:11Ronnie Karam: I don't know, I heard a shh.

56:13Ben Mandelker: You heard a shh?

56:14Ronnie Karam: Yeah, I got, all right. Should we just go until they start? Are we talking too loud? Yes, of course. We're doing remote. plus two whispered like this it's also 10 24 okay we do have mics on that but that

56:30Ben Mandelker: what that no that was not that was that was just a noise but i don't know should we wait till the cops come they'll well you need to get a phone call from the hotel be like excuse me that that was that was your stomach wasn't it no okay let's continue on we're pretty close so this stylist is like not getting out of her chair and she's I was like, get out of the chair, okay? And so the Ramona's like, okay, you know what? Listen, you know what? They got to get out of the chair. I'm not getting out of the chair. And so the Ramona is like, Luanne, she needs to see what you're wearing for the day dress.

57:07Ben Mandelker: And Luanne's like, oh, well, I was just thinking about wearing a white dress. And so the stylist is like, well, I texted Roger that you needed florals. And I was like, yeah, because they need to have fun with you guys. They don't actually, you know, like, they don't, you have to stop hanging out with those gay men. Okay? They don't actually work. Okay? You're just getting distracted by them. You can't stop hanging out with your workers. Yeah, they're very nice.

57:28Ronnie Karam: But they're at work. Okay? You can't be here. Get out of the chair. See, I'm looking at the lady. Luanne's like, well, I'm on time. All right? Well, no. Because you know what? You show up late to everything because watch is out playing with you instead of being your employee. So, what are you talking about? I'm on time.

57:48Ben Mandelker: Listen, I had three hours of sleep. Luann's whole thing is that she was at a show last night. She goes, I had three hours of sleep and I came here to this shoot. Me, our cabaret star, lowering myself to a regional magazine. I might as well be the penny saver. Where are the thank yous? I had three hours of sleep.

58:06Ronnie Karam: Don't fuck with me, I'm worried. She's like, you know what? I'm just playing with you, Luann. Don't get upset. She's like, okay, well, you know what? I have a headache and I had a show the night before and I have a show tonight, but I show for my friends who are not familiar with beauty fair magazine but you know what here we go it's

58:22Ben Mandelker: amazing here we are so then sonia arrives um sonia and ramona well sonia arrived sorry everyone's already there that's three hours before their flight for their bethany photo shoot so uh dorinda is telling ramona she's like you know ramona sonia went crazy on me yesterday like bad like i almost didn't even come this morning because nothing bothers me but when it does i cut the snake off at your head and she's a narcissist and you know i'm you know i'm gonna bring light to it whoa are you gonna cut somia's head off is that what you just said don't believe in violence okay you know

58:55Ronnie Karam: what see something say something threat level watch i think the dorina brings it right to terrorism she's like you know what you gotta do you cut the head off this snake and another one

59:05Ben Mandelker: grows what are you gonna do go into the nest see something say something and we'll get it sorted it, okay? So Sonia is like, oh hey Luann, so you had a show last night, right? And you got up here this morning to be here? Yes, I mean I was driving at one o 'clock in the morning all the way up from Fort Lauderdale. It was nothing. I didn't see a single pillow in sight. I thought, so what kind of fort is this? But apparently it's made of Lauderdales.

59:32Ronnie Karam: Okay, so now they're taking iPhone pictures before the shoot because they're all styled and glammed up in extremely bright colors. So they line up, they line up together. They're lining up together, getting test shots.

59:45Ben Mandelker: And then the stylist who was just - Well, they give it to the stylist to take the photos, right? The stylist is taking the photos of all of them. And then the stylist is - someone offers the stylist, like, you want me to take a photo with you in it? So she goes, sure. And the stylist goes and gets in this line of people next to Ramona of all people. Ramona's like, what are you doing?

1:00:06Ronnie Karam: You don't get to be in this picture. you're not part of this show, get out of this picture. She's like, um, I told you guys she was going to do this. I was like, yeah, you're not allowed to be in this picture. No, we're not taking pictures. Get out of the picture.

1:00:18Ben Mandelker: And Ramona is just like, can you believe this? She has this look like, what would she even think she can get into the cast photo?

1:00:26Ronnie Karam: And you went, she doesn't work with us, and also her car lifts are off too. Like, what is she even wearing?

1:00:32Ben Mandelker: And they're like, what? It was just nice for her. Like, why not? So then we find out.

1:00:36Ronnie Karam: She's like, you know what? I just remembered who that girl is. And then we see that it is the same lady who showed up to the store that Ramona just kicked out of the store and said, you can't be in the store. This is a fancy lady.

1:00:49Ben Mandelker: Why is this woman setting herself up for this torture of just like crashing things that Ramona's doing?

1:00:56Ronnie Karam: Because she's so fucking thirsty too. Like I'm kind of glad Ramona's just like slapping it down because this lady is too much. And so, and the lady's just laughing it off and just keeps walking back in the pictures. It's crazy. I said, no, then rats leave.

1:01:13Ben Mandelker: So I mean, clearly I wonder if like someone told her before, like, oh yeah, come to this party. You know, yeah, you're the stylist for the shoot. Come to this party. You can come. So she went and I was like, no, get me here. Like there's part of it. I can't tell if this lady is thirsty or she's just getting the bad information.

1:01:27Ronnie Karam: I think she's clearly part of production in some way. And Ramona just probably refuses to recognize who she is. but it is hilarious that every but i'm kind of anti this lady too because she's even when she's told like you can't be in the picture she's like okay okay i'll leave right after remoter's

1:01:45Ben Mandelker: exasperation and just continually looking at the camera for validation is so funny to me so then sonia keeps on nattering on she's like well we can't miss our flight it's a multi-million dollar campaign for iraq and was like oh sonia be quiet okay look at the camera taking a photo But every time she says this about the multimillion dollar campaign, Luann gets furious. She goes, well, I mean, I spent the whole night in the car to be here. I'm so sure. Three hours for a cabaret star. I'm the one who's the actual star here. And I'm making this sacrifice. And you're just going to try to just leave when I made that whole drive up the highway?

1:02:17Ben Mandelker: Well, it's one performer to another.

1:02:19Ronnie Karam: I totally get it, Luann. And Luann is like, I'm going to kill. I'm going to kill fucking Sonya. Okay. She's going crazy. And this magazine, whatever it is, beauty rack. Okay. keeps them there for a really long time. They have multiple looks, and Ramona's finally like, what? I gotta go. I gotta go to my Iraq event. That's it. I gotta leave.

1:02:42Ben Mandelker: Ramona just leaves, but leaves Sonia behind.

1:02:49Ben Mandelker: That's the craziest part.

1:02:51Ronnie Karam: She's not even being mean in this one. She's like, okay, girl, this is fun. Ramona, we're not done. We're still standing here. She just walks away.

1:02:59Ben Mandelker: but like what's crazy is that like she's doing this shoot she's taking the same flight as sonya just leave sonya in the dust and the and so then sonya's like going rushing the airport and i just assumed she wouldn't make the flight but they make it and everything like you took a car you took her stylist how am i supposed to get there so now um luann it's time for luann to do her last show for her tour so she's like well it's been eight years uh eight years and three hours if you count the driving I did last night. But 2018 was when I started doing Cabaret, and it's bittersweet that after all that time, I still haven't released an album, but that's fine.

1:03:36Ronnie Karam: Yeah. So Kelly's going to go support, and Dorinda's obviously going to be the moderator of this. And Dorinda's like, you know what? I mean, this is just too much. I would have canceled if it weren't for Luann, because I just, I don't know. I'm not feeling it. But even not in a great mindset, I can do this Cabaret night, because I'm professional on a radio show all right so they arrived to the amateur oh theater which really

1:04:01Ben Mandelker: made me laugh i didn't even realize i never said it out loud amateur oh started cracking up

1:04:09Ronnie Karam: it's like all right basically i'm sharing barbara strengs and carol burnett welcome to the amateur oh

1:04:15Ben Mandelker: this was a this is a theater that was made to troll the performers so they're all fucking muddy Roger is like, Roger is like setting up Dorinda in the room and everything. And Dorinda is like, but I didn't memorize my lines. And the man's like, well, just read off the cue cards. I mean, but there are key things that I have to say. It's very important that when you say pie, I say red. Do you know?

1:04:37Ronnie Karam: Listen, you say one word and I have to cue the video. They're very important things. You know, most people don't get to hear girl code until you say girl code. So you have to read the cards. She's like, I gotta read a cue card.

1:04:52Ben Mandelker: Dorinda's like, I gotta read a cue cards. Then she goes, who's the moderator? You're the moderator. I gotta do all this stuff. I thought I was just doing the highlights in yellow. Wait a minute, what is all this? What is all this? You didn't give your information to Roger? Roger's like, it's super, super easy. Do you want to talk this through right now or no? And Roger tells us, yeah, Dorinda and I were going to sit down and just run through the in moderation of the show, but she didn't want to film with me,

1:05:18Ronnie Karam: so that never happened. You know, to be fair to Roger, Luann has also already talked Dorinda's head off about this for an hour. Like how many meetings do you need to have to be like, wow, Luann, welcome. Tell us about the pirate. Yeah, what about the pirate? She's like, you were wrongfully arrested. All right. So she does the show and we've all seen the show, I think. Wait, well, here, just a taste of it.

1:05:44Ben Mandelker: Ladies and gentlemen, this is the Countess speaking. We have arrived. Jams, jets, silhouettes, champagne in the sky, fine premieres and fireworks every single night, gold on diamonds, and caviar. Life is but a dream, when every day you live against Jeeves on TV, hair done, jewelry on, mirror on the wall. Who's the fairest in the land? I guess it's not as called. Sheila, she says, she, C 'est la vie, C 'est bon, C 'est bon. Ah, oh, oh. Je, C 'est la vie, C 'est bon, C 'est bon. Why are you going so fast? The land's like panting up there. Oh no.

1:06:12Ronnie Karam: Because you can tell someone's worked with her on rhythm because she's coming out and she's like,

1:06:21Ben Mandelker: And the reason why I can see this all is because this is what I was like when we did our cabaret and I had to like sing to the beat and you just, I can sing to the beat in the car. I can sing to the beat anywhere. But when it came time, once we had like a live pianist, I was, I was a hundred percent behind, but it was so much harder. And so like seeing the land, just try to try to stand beat. I was like, I recognize that because that was literally how I felt doing our show.

1:06:50Ronnie Karam: It is. That's why you have to have live, live stuff. And she's my, you know, usually she has a band there so they can at least vamp like for us when we get off or whatever. They're like when Brandon's like, we'll just change the rhythm. We'll just change the rhythm. Okay. We'll slow it back down there. Okay. We'll start singing a different song. Yeah.

1:07:07Ben Mandelker: Yeah, but when you're seeing the track, you're just going. You're fucked. You're fucked. Yeah, you're fucked.

1:07:13Ronnie Karam: So Luanne's like, oh, I love you, poor Lauderdale. You know why? You showed up for me. Okay, you turn out for the Countess. All right, applause. Also, please welcome Roger. Welcome Roger to the cast. He's like, oh, my God. Hello, everybody.

1:07:26Ben Mandelker: Please stop booing, everyone. Please stop booing. We understand he's not a real housewife. Oh, sorry. That was just Dorinda booing in the stage. Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to give that part away. Ladies and gentlemen, Dorinda Medley.

1:07:37Ronnie Karam: He's like, well, guys, I think that I shouldn't be here. Maybe we should have a special guest to make things nice. He's like, yeah. So Dorinda comes out. She's like, all right. It's so good to see everyone. Did you fuck the pirate? Yes, no.

1:07:51Ben Mandelker: Okay, good night. Thank you. Well, this is the story. Okay, well, we go to St. Bart's. We're having the best time. And the pirate has weed. He has a full thing of grass. And I said, I don't give a fuck about the pirate. I just want to party with the pirate. You know what I mean? I want to have some of that ganja. so wouldn't you want to party with a pirate well guess who fucked the pirate Sonia Rita Sonia

1:08:13Ronnie Karam: fucked the pirate everyone I still believe the original story who told it Heather I think they all told it on this show they both fucked that pirate yeah in the greenhouse with the candlestick

1:08:25Ben Mandelker: we all know it so a questioner is like it's time for Q &A so someone goes do you think Bethany is jealous that you guys got this new show on E! and she did not? Well, I think that Bethany is done. Everything is premeditated with her, from her Burning Man goggles to whatever Iraq tourism board she's going these days. Whoa, you know what? I don't appreciate that. A Brack has the best cheese in the country. Well, Tigris and Euphrates, you're afraid if you don't come to Iraq.

1:08:59Ronnie Karam: all right you know what i want girls who understand girl code amara all right where's the girl code i

1:09:06Ben Mandelker: said girl gone and so then everyone ladies and gentlemen please welcome kelly ben simone but everyone come on down we're gonna finish it up and then it ends with her being seeing money can't buy you class just some i wish we could tell the upstairs neighbor this is the end money can't buy you class what what a show man what a show just i mean it's only the third episode it feels like the 30th but i'm still laughing my ass off yeah it's definitely more low budge than um than bravo but like the chemistry is just they're just so funny even even in the moments where you see them really working hard to make stuff happen they they do it better than most shows i mean

1:09:51Ronnie Karam: to fight oh to still be fighting over something that's like a decade old and still have veins popping out of your head because you believe it so much i mean that is the delusion of this show you can't make up this kind of delusion you're born with this you're born with it it's fabulous god bless you guys all right everybody thanks so much for being here thanks neighbors thanks neighbors and we'll talk to you at the live shows here in Philly and in DC and then in Texas this coming week bye

1:10:40Ronnie Karam: Just a Sheila. She's a Daniela. Itchles! We never miss her call. It's Diane Call. Big yay, it's Emily Gauthier. Erin McNicholas.

1:10:49Ben Mandelker: She don't miss no trick-a-less. Hala Nagila Weber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones.

1:10:54Ronnie Karam: It's no BS. We love Hugo ES. Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch. She's our pal-a-ger. It's Karen Gallagher.

1:11:03Ben Mandelker: She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock.

1:11:06Ronnie Karam: Kristen the Piston Anderson. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McHenry. Come again? We're obsessed with Margaret O 'Halloran. Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg. I love-a-ya, Olivia Williamson. She's the lady of the house, it's Rachel Sherouse. She's not the bottom, she's Rachel Topper. Yes, we canna, it's Sadana.

1:11:30Ben Mandelker: Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge.

1:11:34Ronnie Karam: Don't get mixed signals, we love Signy. Darn Skippy, it's Tippi. And our super premium sponsors. She's VVIP. It's Amanda V.

1:11:43Ben Mandelker: Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD.

1:11:46Ronnie Karam: We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O 'Neill. Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Hogel your horses. It's Christine Hogel. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides.

1:12:02Ben Mandelker: Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. Nothing can take the placing of Jason We got our wish, it's Jen Plish My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo Let's get savage with Laura Wildman In the study with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Barron She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy Always killing it, it's Lo Alkalani Roger that, it's Marlis Rogers

1:12:29Ronnie Karam: The incredible edible Matthews sisters She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud She's our princess, it's Rebecca Prince She's the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke We cannot tell a lie, it's Sarah Talafson Yes we canna, it's Savannah

1:12:48Ben Mandelker: Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony We have no notes, Shelby Walter Please don't stop, it's Soli and Pop Let's take off with Tamla Plain Strike a pose, it's Tori Rose

1:13:00Ronnie Karam: She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar We love you guys.

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