Giggling about botox, tanning beds, and nipple piercings

0:14Hello

0:20Why was that? I mean, that was just, it was great. It was great. It's actually how I needed to start the pod tonight. Wait, Paige said, I told her a way that I wanted her to start the pod. She said, don't creative direct me. She has something to start. This pod is 50-50. So please, how would you like to start it? Two men. She's pointing at the camera. Okay, I have to say something. And nobody knows. My mom doesn't even know. And I've been holding it in for almost seven days. And I haven't, I literally, that's why I haven't been texting you back. Because I'm like, I have to tell. Wait, we actually have had kind of a quiet back and forth week.

0:58Sure. Because you didn't want to lie to me. Yeah. Can I guess? Yeah. I feel like you know it. You got Botox. Yeah. No. Okay. So I go into the appointment. First of all, I go into the appointment after we were going. You guys, wait. This is, you guys, this has never happened in the history of Giggly Squad. Page six. Page six. Now's your time to shine. This is hot goss off the press. Hot goss. She froze her eggs and then she froze her face. Continue. Okay, so. They said, like, continue. Wait. Continue. I'm so excited. Sorry. Okay, so I go to the doctor after we record Giggly Squad last week. Let's be honest.

1:38After you record Giggly Squad, you're raw. You're feeling vulnerable. You're feeling vulnerable. I'm like, you could literally convince me of anything right now. So I sit down and she's like, how did you hear about me? Like, tell me what brings you in. I literally thought it was like a therapist. Like the way she worded it, she was like, what are your goals? What are your aspirations? She was like, how are your innards? Yeah. And I was like, look, I'm very skin focused, skin forward before Botox and injections and all of that. And I was like, and not because I'm against it at all. I just know myself and I know I'm going to be obsessed with it.

2:13and she's like okay honestly you're building it up so much like get over it you're 33 yeah she's like how have you even lasted this long she goes you're geriatric in terms of pregnancy literally she was like you look 102 thank god you found me but this is a problem when you talk to botox people yes they're so used to talking about it that they are very like babe who gives a fuck and she was like tell me what your biggest fears are regarding it or in life yeah honestly we got into it the point it was only 30 minutes I was there for a full hour was she like see what's happening under your eye here that's from the stress I've been watching you talk so I can tell how your face already moves and I'm and I can already tell you that I wouldn't even give you a full amount that I give transplant yeah like she's like your face you don't have to use some of the face we'll keep some of it she was like I'm I guess the normal is like 60 cc's I don't even know she's like I I wouldn't even go up to that.

3:10Like I would give you 40. And so I'm still like, okay. We're talking about Prozac? Are we talking about? Who knows? At this point, I'm like, I don't. Where's the numbers start? What's the numbers? Big Pharma got involved. Wait, when she started saying numbers, do I blank? Yeah, I was like, where? So I'm sitting there and I'm like, like when I get uncomfortable, I do just like things like with my hands. And so I'm like visibly uncomfortable. And I'm like, I got to walk out of this appointment. I'm not just like going rogue and getting Botox. I'm alone. on a Monday afternoon. I didn't even tell my mom I was going to this appointment.

3:42I thought she was going to hit me with like, oh, let's do like microdermabrasion and then like we'll wait on Botox. I thought you were going to say she was going to hit me with a pan or something. Honestly, who knows? I mean. Hit me with a panini. Okay, so you're there alone. You're scared. You're hungry. So I'm sitting there. I'm like visibly uncomfortable. You're naked and afraid. Yeah, she's like, what are your biggest fears? And I go, well, I told my best friend that I would do this with her. And so now not only am I betraying her, but I haven't even told my mom. No one knows I'm here right now.

4:17I literally felt like I was a spy. But the thing is, Botox is such an individual experience where you need to have your moment alone to be like, what's really going on? Because we can't do a two for one. That's crazy. She was like, okay, I'm going to do it. Oh, so she basically goes. She's like, okay, we're going to do it. Wait, that's me at the nail salon. They're like, we're not going to do that color. She was like, you're not going to hate it. And if you do, it goes away. And I like, you never have to come back here. What were your like areas that you were like, don't touch versus touch? I didn't say don't touch anything.

4:53Obviously, I brought up my orbital bone. And she goes, it's more noticeable to you than it is to the average person. I go, have you seen the internet? Have you heard of Giggly Squad? have you ever have you heard of Instagram at all and she's like I can do like a little bit to help that but like so there was no places yeah it looks the same she was like it takes 10 days to like really start working oh so I'm like almost there you're you're six days in and she said it'll be gone in like four months okay did she say because your metabolism is so fast it's gonna she didn't say I go back next week for her to just like check in Okay, so she was a facial balancing artist?

5:36I don't know. But she was amazing. And you want to know what? Actually, I'm happy I even lasted this long. Botox has been being pushed to me since I was eight years old. Eight years old? I mean, have you? Yeah, were you alive? Watching any TV, like aging has been pushed to women since literally before I was in puberty. I didn't miss watching Y2K 2000s comedies, though, where the hot girls had normal lips. Well, you know I love a period piece. Yes. White chicks. My favorite period piece. And I can't watch a period piece if one of the actresses has Instagram face. I just watched House of Guinness on Netflix, and the main girl, stunning, gorgeous.

6:20But she had her lips done. And I was like, they didn't have their lips done then. And so I can't. Des said that it wasn't historically accurate, so we couldn't watch it. It wasn't historically accurate. He's correct. I looked it up after. Wait, so. But phenomenal show. I need to dig in a little more. You can't just drop that bomb and then leave. So were you like, what was your biggest fear? That I was going to look different and that I was going to be addicted to it. Which I am. Wait, were you afraid that when I walked in today, I was going to be like, have you seen Paige? No, I thought my mom.

6:53Because I FaceTime with my parents all the time. So I thought, and my mom has always been like, did you get your lips done? And I'm like, what? No, I just had a lot of salt yesterday. So like she's very on it with my face. My mom would just be like, when was the last time you did Pilates?

7:11No, so I was nervous. Well, your eyebrows are moving. Yeah, like I can raise my. They're still moving. Yeah. Are they going to like in the next couple of days move less? I don't know. We don't know. Are you like obsessed with looking at your face? I'm obsessed. Okay, do you want to tell the girls where you got it? Or do you not know? I'm going to put it in the newsletter. I'll put like where the doctor's office, the actual place I went to, the girl that did it. And we'll do like a whole down. Wait, I'm really happy for you. I'm really happy too. Like I am excited for it. I'm excited. Also, it's gone in like five months.

7:47Also, I think, like, we've decided as a nation that, like, Botox is great. Nothing matters. And filler is what you have to be afraid of. Yeah. I actually almost got – there's – I don't know. I'm back on the algorithm of these doctors. Would you get Botox done by a doctor whose face looks – Crazy. Or not even crazy, like – No. Yeah, you wouldn't. No. That's insane. See, sometimes I'm, like – I feel like when you go to a plastic surgeon's office for anything, like you could be going to get like a mole removed. Yeah. But the people working in the office are almost like examples, I feel like. Yeah, they're like mannequins.

8:28You specifically should be the number one example. But I kind of love a surgeon that's like never touched their face. A surgeon that like doesn't believe in surgery. Yeah, like they're sagging. A surgeon that just judges you the whole time and is like, I would never. You go, okay, that's – someone has an ego. Yeah, I feel like – oh, yeah, this one lady was like, oh, I will put hyaluronic acid. But then I realized that's filler. They just don't say filler. They call it hyaluronic acid, though. No. Which she tricked me. I was like, sure. So wrong. Sure. No, you're wrong. Oh. No, hyaluronic acid is, like, in your skin care.

9:08Oh, they put something, hyaluronic something. Actually, Chris, spell hyaluronic. H-I-L-O. No, H-I, you freak. Christopher, okay. Paige literally just looked at you. Even I knew that. Even Paige knew. Speaking of body dysmorphia, I went to Victoria's Secret. Oh, my God, yes. Wait, so, by the way, Paige and I weren't going to go. We had other plans. Yeah. Then I pulled a fast one on her. And I go, I casually on Monday was like, I think I'm going to go to Victoria's Secret. And then that's when you were like, I don't like you can't just do that. Yeah. I was like, no, I can't go. The way I can't go anywhere anymore without people being like, where's Paige?

9:50Yeah. I met Jenna Lyons for the first time. She goes, where's Paige? And I was like, she's sleeping. And everyone and she was like, oh, my God, like all mad that you were sleeping. And I was like, let's have respect for rest. Yeah. Let's bring back rest. I can't do everything. You know, you can't do everything for anyone. I can't do it all. I just had facial construction surgery. I was recovering from being gorgeous. You just had full surgery. Yeah. So you never know where they're going to seat you. So funny. They sat me next to Matt Rogers. And I'm like, I love that they put the two comedians together.

10:22Yeah. The sideline banter. No, he's phenomenal. Was incredible. Because in the beginning, we were just loving everything. And then by the end, we were acting. Like when you watch the Olympics, at first you're like, this is amazing. And then you're like, okay, let's get the knee up a little more. You know when they mic up, like, football players when they're, like, practicing or something or, like, on, like, game days? Yeah. Petition to mic you up at all fashion events. Me? Yes. Like, every single fashion event, if we could have a recap just from you being mic'd up while they're walking down. Do you want to—you know why I love this show?

10:59Because it was a fucking party. so like when everyone went down like Matt and I were yelling like wow and then I got obsessed with you know when you like watch basketball and you try to like say their names so they look at you I was obsessed when the girl would go down I'd be like yes angel and like try to get her to look at me and every now and then they would look at me it's not about you how dare you say that how dare you say that I loved your outfit oh my god you looked very she can I give you the tea? yeah so someone jokingly said to me, you should go on eBay and get like a vintage Victoria's Secret like lingerie.

11:38Yeah. So I went online. I bought like three or four of them. They were all like 40 bucks. That was$50. It's called a chemise. Chemise. Okay. A chemise. Chemise. A cami. A cami. But it was literally$40 and I tried it on and it was like giving. And then I wore my granny panties. And obviously you had those. And then I got Lucio to shoot. Iconic. And he was like, we have to get the iconic page shot where all the hands are in. And then Grace's hand was on the bottom. It was really funny. But I do have to say, I saw Missy Elliott perform three songs. That was really insane. The millennial heart. And then sitting a couple yards away was La Roche, Sarah Jessica Parker.

12:29and Claude Savigny who's kind of like a little bit of my fashion icon. I was gonna say you like I could see you vibing to her. Like aesthetic. She's very cool. Yeah. And like but not like doesn't care if you think she's cool. Like her and the girl from Girls that plays Jessa like those two vibes are so your like style vibes. But Jessa by the way I follow her on Instagram she's amazing. She's the one that said someone asked We think about ourselves too much. Iconic. She's like a little more like fairy. Like she's like mystical. You guys also all have like similar hair. Why did you say it like that?

13:11You went hair. Because it's always like just like a messy like. I didn't brush it today. I knew you were going to say something. Like it's very boho. It's very boho chic. It's very Chloe. It's type B. You're being defensive.

13:29Sorry, I'm Botox now. I'm symmetrical. I'm perfect. I've always wanted this. Wait, also, I always have, like, a new beauty thing that I'm, like, researching and, like, trying to do. Okay, so I've tried to do Invisalign for, like, I'm not kidding, seven years. I just tried to start it again today. It hurts so bad. It hurts so bad, but also it's so hard to do when you have a job like this. During COVID, I was incredible. Amazing. but there are so many times where I like I have to actually be able to speak and I have a lisp when I have it like I just like can't yeah so I was like looking up online well did I tell you about the time when I was at a wedding and a girl came up to me and was like what are you doing with your teeth what I'm at a wedding okay I'm standing I'm standing with one of my girlfriends okay I'm eating, chatting, talking shit.

14:25No, yeah, I'm like vibing. I'm being a good guest. Like I'm sucking dick and accidentally hitting him with it. Like, hello. I'm chopping it up, chatting with this girl. Another girl comes over. She's like to my right. Okay. But she's like in my side profile. Like she's looking at me from the side. You go, it was my mom. And I'm chatting to my girlfriend. And then like the conversation like kind of ends. And this girl goes, what are you doing with your teeth? That was it. That was the end of the sentence. And I just go, I'm like mid-bite. I'm like, I don't know what should I be doing. Wait, she meant like they look good?

15:01I don't know. No. No. I mean, no. And so, and I do have like... Like, what are you wearing? What are you up to with your teeth? Yeah. I feel like the phrase, what are you doing with? The with is, it's the with that food is. Also, you're not doing anything with it. This is how your teeth look. Yeah, like, there's not much. What you're doing with it, it's not like you got bad veneers or anything. And I think she could see that I had, like, an Invisalign bracket. And I was like, oh, like, I'm always trying to do Invisalign, but, like, I can just never do it. Like, I can't stick to it. Like, I'll go four weeks and then I fall off, like, blah, blah, blah, whatever.

15:38And she was like, well, you should get braces under your teeth. And I was like, what is that? And she was like, a lot of, like, people in entertainment do it on the inside. Yeah. So I might do it on my top teeth. I might do that on my bottom teeth. The thing is. Did you just get that idea right now? You go, hey. Oh, so first you do Botox without me. Then you do the races without me. You're just leaving me behind. Wait. No, it's because, first of all, I have cemetery teeth if I let them go. You have what? Like, my bottom teeth will look like a cemetery, like gravestones. Like, they get really crossed up.

16:16I need a new topic, actually. Let's actually put a pin in this for until next week. You took it gross. I was talking tastefully about my teeth. No, but if you have it, like food gets stuck in it a lot. That's what they said. But you just have to get one of those water washers, which you would love to have. I have a water pick. Yeah. I'm kidding. Water pick is so. I saw one TikTok and was like, yeah. So I know my mom water picks for like two hours every night. She's iconic. Yeah, she's like really good with her teeth. I know. But, yeah, I tried to do Invisalign today, and I was immediately in, like, a horrible mood.

16:49I'm like, why am I in a bad mood? I'm like, oh, yeah, because my teeth are fucking killing me. I just can't do it. Well, I don't know. I had braces when I was younger. I don't know why they didn't give me, like, a permanent retainer. See, I love your teeth. At least you're not, like, not to, like, compare, but, like, when my teeth go off, like, I get buck tooth. Well, I just, like, don't like, like, two of them. So I need to fix them. True. What are their names? But I'm not, I would never get veneers. What are their names? I haven't named them. They don't deserve names. Twiddle D and twiddle dumb.

17:17Oh, one last thing Jenna Lyons said about us. She was like, oh my God, you guys are like, you and Paige are like an iconic lesbian couple. And I was like, thank you. No, we are. I said, from the head of the lesbian community, thank you. I recently have had an influx of lesbians being like, waiting for you to come out. And I'm like, okay. I may or may not have spread that rumor. Also, you saw Sierra Miller. Okay. So I get there. I'm sitting with Haley. who I'm allowed to hang out with because she's blonde. And I was like, Sierra must be here. Either she's walking, which she should be, or she's here.

17:52But I didn't have any service. So when it was over, everyone was just like, okay, get out. So we're all walking. And, of course, I walk right into her. I look her up and down. And she looks at me. She goes, don't do it. Don't do it. And I start taking my phone out. She goes, don't say it. She goes, fuck, don't say it. And I go, this is what Sierra ordered my wedding. And she's like, fuck you. don't both right when I saw her literally right when I saw a picture of what she was wearing I immediately text Hannah and I go Sierra's at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show find her because you're gonna love her outfit the second she saw me she goes oh no and then she's like and don't talk about it on Giggly Squad wait I also told her we weren't gonna talk about it on Giggly Squad yeah I said I would never talk about it on Giggly Squad did you see her bag I didn't know it was a bag she kept like handing it to me and I thought it was just like a toy she brought and then later on I realized it was a bag.

18:45I saw it on the interweb and I said, oh my god, Sierra wants that kind of cat. And so I bought her that bag because I was just like, she needs to have this bag. I thought you were going to say, so I bought her a Sphinx. I don't like the name of that cat. Sphinx? Yeah. Do you know that they're really oily? I have heard that. And like if you have one, then like their oil gets on your couch and stuff. Or that could be good for your skin. Disgusting, no. That's where I draw the line. But also, now that you've Botoxed, do you even have to do skincare? You're kind of just like glowing. I feel different.

19:18You know what it feels like? Did you ever go tanning in high school, like to a tanning bed? No. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Seriously? No, because my mom is like obsessed with me getting cancer. Not one time you've never been in a tanning bed. No, my mom doesn't want me to get cancer. Oh, my. That's why my skin looks so good. Oh, my God, Hannah. You have never walked into a tanning bed with a girl who literally is orange with her hair up like this. Being like, do you need goggles? No. I did get a spray tan for the first time in college and it got all over like everything. And then I didn't do it until Summer House when you made me do it.

19:55Okay, spray tanning or tanning beds in high school were my religion, my life. How often did you go? We went every single day after school. Like everyone went every single day after school. Wait, now I'm stressed for you. I literally got so tan one year, I was like neon, and my mom started crying. She was like, you're ruining yourself. So she knew. She knew. And I knew that about Botox. I was like, this is going to be just like a tanning bed circa 2008. Like, I'm going to fucking love it. Wait, maybe that's why people don't give me cocaine, because they could tell that I didn't do tanning beds.

20:24Maybe it's a correlation. There is a tanning bed cocaine pipeline.

20:31Actually, they would give you cocaine in the tanning bed. New reality, it's a TV series. Where's your tanning place, receptionist? Now. Actually, fuck Vanderpump Rules. I want to see the drama that goes on in a tanning salon. A lot. And you could tell you could cut it with a knife during prom season. You could literally cut it with a knife. Prom season, they were like, can I have a day? They had a rule where it was like you could only go once a day. Like you couldn't go. Why would you need to go more than once a day? Well, because sometimes you're short on time. So you could only go once a day.

21:04So we would go to different tanning places so that we could go more than once a day. Can you please put like a health warning? Yeah. I mean, I haven't gone to a tanning bed since literally 2010. OK, this is my question. And I know the answer. I do wish they would come back, though. Like the dopamine hit of a tanning bed, especially the dead of winter. How long would you be lying there for? I would get up to like 12 minutes. Was it like hot? Yeah, it's like toasty. OK, my question to you, even though I know the answer. Would you get a sticker, like, on your lower hip? I didn't. I always wanted to because they're so cool.

21:41But you don't put a sticker on a Lamborghini. But my mom would have lost her fucking mind. Oh, the cancer was fine, but not the sticker. Yeah. Yeah. We're still vain assholes. Okay, let's not get it twisted. Actually, the one, the thing that really deterred me. I can't believe you never even felt what it feels like. Final Destination 3? Yes, but now Hannah and Paige try new things. New episode. I have to take you tanning. No, like my mom would like literally like call the police if I was in a tanning bed. Oh my God. Wait, do you think less or more of me? I'm not sure. I'm not sure. You know what it is?

22:25You have zero rebellion in you at all. I have zero rebellion. What is that, you think? Well, that's where I rebel now. No, that's nice. I rebel now with my outfits. Yeah, because, like, there was a time in high school when my mom was like, don't go tanning. And I was like, okay. No, I've never. And I'm like, Stephanie, can you drive me tanning? I mean, not to get deep into it, but, yeah, no, I was Mrs. Goody Two-Shoes. Yeah. Because I wanted everyone to love me and choose me and pick me. Interesting. I always pick me, but, like, for my parents. You're, like, biologically programmed to pick you.

22:58By the way, I was talking to Des about this because we were talking about bullying our younger siblings. it was so fucked up you know you joke where you'd look at your brother when i was really mad at him the worst thing i would do was i'd be like you know you're adopted and i was thinking about why it was so fucked up when i did it because my brother has blue eyes and blonde hair so i'd be like let's say what everyone's been thinking look in the fucking mirror you're fucking adopted and he goes mom told me i'm not and i go that's of course she would say that that's what she would say. As a younger sister, who has trauma.

23:29But you and Gary look like the same font. Well, there are no pictures of my mom pregnant with me, and we still haven't gotten to the bottom of it. She was like, I gained 50 pounds. I didn't want a photo. You're like, I know who the dad is. Don't know who the mom is. There is something amiss. Still to this day, 32 years old, and if my brother says I'm adopted, I quick look at my mom just to see her initial reaction. I'm not convinced. Oh, I have to make an apology. The floor is yours. I did something jarring. Yeah. And I didn't warn you. Okay. I know what it is. I know what it is. And you did this last time, right?

24:05Oh, I didn't know we were helping. You did this last time today. I didn't know we were keeping score. You changed your profile picture. All of a sudden, you're DMing me, and I'm like, who is DMing me? Who's DMing me? Because you get used to the photos staring back at you. So I'm easily, you know, socially peer pressured. Yeah. So I posted those new photos and people liked them and everyone's like, change your profile picture. So I changed it and immediately I didn't like it. I thought it was too sexy for me. Because sometimes when I'm so sexy, I'm like, people can't handle this. It's too much sex.

24:34No, your profile picture is very reflective of what you're going through at that time and how you feel about yourself. Yeah, and I don't want people to go to my page and immediately see Sex Kitten, even though, like, am I a Sex Kitten? Yes. But do I always want to be her? No. Is it hard being a sex kitten so much? Yeah. You being 20, 25. Okay, you don't have to laugh that hard. You're a 20, 25 sex symbol of the year. I just think girls who are 34 have the highest sex drive. Like, we're. Wait, do they? Oh, my God. You're 30s. It's crazy. You start, like, humping tables again. Look at you. You're only 32.

25:15Just wait. It's going to hit. Wait, I turn 33, like, tomorrow. I know. I'm ready. I'm ready. I have your gift. 30, 33 and 32, same age. Yeah. 34, you're 40. Okay. Enjoy. That's crazy. 34, I'm 35. I'm not 40 yet. But 35, I'm 40. 35 is 40. One year. Me and me. No, turning 33 is great because you're like, I'm still 30. Yeah, I don't care about turning 34. The following years, I'm going to have to put you in like a psych ward. I think we got the Botox now. You guys, I'm 34, Paige is 32 right now. I'm like, you little baby. You little tiny baby. Good. Keep treating me like that. You are. You're my little young baby with my baby Botox.

25:57You know what I did this week? What'd you do? You know when you have like... Yes. Actually, I was going to say no, you definitely don't.

26:10You know when you have projects around your house that like you want to get done?

26:17And you don't. I know that you don't. I'm like, when my mom visits, I'm going to chill down. Yeah, okay. She'll tell. Exactly my point. So I have, like, insane closet space in my apartment. I really have, like, great closets. But I have everything's, like, split up into my closet. So, like, not all my stuff is in, like, one closet, like a freaking normal person. Mm-hmm. So I have, like, six of them. Okay? And I'm not complaining. Wait, can I just - And I'm not bragging. Can I call you out? One of these could have been a bedroom for, like, her family when she visited. that's crazy you could have had a pull out couch that's crazy I don't want people staying I don't want you coming and staying with me for the weekend that's smart get a hotel like a normal person mom and dad you were saying you have a project and you have six closets so this week I was like guys

27:12alright I was like guys I can't get glam I literally was like I'm not glamming this week at all. I'm not glamming. I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying in my apartment. That's the only thing I'm doing Monday through Friday. You did Amazon. I know. Josephine told me. I know. And I was like this poor girl. That was the only time I had to leave my apartment. So I did all my Zooms and all my calls from that. I literally had a week where it's like, you know, and you're just like, oh, when I have time, I'll do that. I dedicated a week to all of those projects. projects and it was so invigorating and amazing and my apartment looks fake it's in tip-top shape I do have to say like you went on Fallon like the previous week and like there's something weird to be said that like the joy of going on Fallon is actually equivalent to the joy of like finishing a project in your house I don't mean to be like like Fallon is not incredible but there is it's what brings you joy in your heart.

28:12It's what brings you joy. And I've done Fallon. I've never completed a project in my house. And what I would give to finish. I installed shelves. I took my toolbox out. Wait, I knew you did because I sent you that meme of that cat. You give me an edible and I'll come up with crazy organizational projects. So this is my brain right now. You guys. So I haven't received my driver's license yet. Like in the mail. In the mail, because I don't know what my address is. I've moved so many times. Gun to my head, couldn't tell you where it is. But then, like, you go online, and my DMV, I can't get it to work.

28:49Okay. So then Des was, like— Did it stress you out when I said you have to register or you have to vote? Yeah. Well, I think I'm actually—I'm set up to vote in Long Island. Oh. Which is my situation, I believe, but I have to double check. the DMV Des was like send them an email and I was like I don't think the DMV does I don't think but anyway I sent them an email and being like hi my name's Hope your week is going well they're like the DMV has a fuck you button like for sure so they respond with like a generic email being like hey we don't know what you're talking about can you call this number which I took as a I'm never gonna get my license so Des yesterday was like did you call the DMV and I was like I emailed them.

29:36You're like, no, I'm a millennial. I didn't call the DMV. That's what I said. He goes, well, what'd they say? And he said, they gave me a number, but obviously I'm not going to do that. And he goes, you have to call them. And I'm like, no. You're like, call text. So I have to call them. I'd actually rather. Wait, has this been stressing you out for days? Days? This is month two. This is two months in. I passed my test in August. Wait, because that you haven't called? Yeah. So I'd actually rather physically go into the DMV than call them. Because I don't think they're going to. But there's something about customer service where whenever I have to explain what's wrong, they always respond to me like they've never heard it in the world.

30:11And, like, I'm insane. Yeah. Like, you know, you say something, like, so basic. Yeah. You'd be like, hey, I have to set up a new appointment. And they're like, what? I don't do customer service. So I don't know what to do. I just keep that. I don't even return. I'm like, I can't. I think I just, like, I'm not going to have a driver's license. I think you should call. Again, if there's that good gigglers at the DMV, I need your help. Also, one other note. I really thought in 2025 there'd be more things going on with 3D printers. Hannah? Yes. I've never been more aligned on something. I just thought about this.

30:50I thought we were going to be building houses by now. The way I thought. Do you remember when all the 3D printer talk was happening a couple years ago, there was a girl that came out with getting your nails done through a 3D printer. Where is she? Where is she? Are they holding her hostage? It was like you put your hand in a machine and it just went and did it like quickly. Big nail group companies were like, oh, hell no. Sally Hansen is, no. What's going on with 3D printing? When I first heard of 3D printing, I said, oh, this is. I thought they were going to solve like so many medical things.

31:19No, for sure. I recently heard of something. There's certain, oh, someone told me there's a conspiracy theory that, this is so niche and not important, but it's for the golfers out there. Perfect for the podcast. Okay, so if you ever play golf, all you do is, like, lose your golf ball all the time. And I realized, like, it's definitely there should be an app to help you find your golf ball. Like, men spend hours just, like, in the woods trying to find their golf balls. Then I realized they don't want to have an app for people to find golf balls because they want people to keep buying golf balls.

31:51And that's on period. Big golf ball. Big golf ball. They're a real motherfucker. They could also just change the color of the golf balls. Yes, but it's still hard to see it if it gets in the woods. Men are out here just searching for golf balls for hours. But then again, maybe the wives are like, good, I don't want them to find the golf ball. Let them just search for the golf ball. But then it's funny because men can't find anything ever. So maybe it's just the men. Because I find my golf balls. when you're golfing like and you hit it into like the woods are you actually hitting it from the woods back?

32:34Sometimes you're not picking it up and carrying no that's cheating golf sounds stupid I would be cheating all the time so when you're in the woods like sometimes if you hit it wrong it can hit the tree and come back and like kill you no like golf is a serious sport people don't talk about it but like like it's my brother almost has anyone ever died playing professional golf yeah really my brother almost decapitated me once like waltzed on TV like playing someone DM'd me they were like I know you make fun of Paige not being able to spell but every now and then she drops a word that everyone's like like waltzed that was crazy thank you people have died people definitely have gotten concussions I mean in professional golf I don't think anyone any professional golfers have died while playing golf I think people who are watching them play have died because they got hit with the ball.

33:28Like people be dying.

33:33I mean it's inevitable. People are going to die. If you wanted to kill someone go and golf.

33:45I can't tell. If you were a hitman like that's how you would set it up so it could look like an accident. is really going golfing. Could you step back a little more? They're perfect. Can you look up if anyone's died? I am looking it up right now. It doesn't look like anybody's died on the field. Okay, look, I had a really good idea with 3D printers. And that's friendship. Sometimes you're going to have really good ideas. Really high highs and really low lows. And you have to remember that that's the same person you love. Wait, it's literally like quicksand 3D printers. I thought it was going to be more prevalent in our society.

34:27I thought it was going to, yeah. I did not see AI coming. Okay, that really threw me for a loop. I mean, I did. Have you seen iRobot like 15 years ago? I just thought that like we'd have more, it'd be more accessible to get like 3D printed things. I just think that people don't. Like I thought I'd own a 3D printer by now. No, for sure. Wait, I know what happened. Printers don't work. No one can figure out. Before we have a 3D printer, let's get a normal printer to work. It's like Bluetooth. That's the way with printers. Printers used to work until you guys got all fancy with it. I swear to God, doesn't I got a printer?

35:04It's never worked. We've had it for like six months. It's never worked. I've seen that printer. Yeah, it's never worked. You know what's crazy? I use my printer all the time. And it works. You run out of ink? Ever? Do you know how to replace the ink cartridge? I do. Also the... No, I can't. That's like the DMV. No, no, it's Sunday. You guys, it's a Sunday, by the way. Oh my God, do you know what would be such a good movie? Botox, serial killer. How a woman is killing people, giving them Botox. Yeah, I think about that all the time. When I get like an IV. Yeah, you think everyone with IV is trying to murder you.

35:42Speaking of trying to murder me. I got into an Uber the other day and you ever like you're just so parched like you're so fucking thirsty every second of the day you're just like I'll die if I don't have a sip of water literally me every second and I get into this Uber and in the cup holder two freshly ice cold aquapana I mean I was in an SUV it was nice it looked so good but in my head I can never drink a drink from an uber take a piece of gum or a mint because you've poisoned it wait so you're like torching yourself staring at the water staring at it wait but do you ever see like okay if it's not opened don't trust it but there's a seal for a reason you think they murdered they the people i think they unsealed it put in the poison sealed it back up it's not that hard to reseal things true if you have a resealer at home yeah i'm sure you could get one on amazon on it.

36:41I'm sure you can 3D print a resealer. Wait, that's crazy. And I feel bad because some Uber drivers, you're like, you can tell that they, like, do a lot. They're like, I'm going to go and get all of this stuff for the back of my car. I'm going to have this, like, thing playing. There's lights. And I'm just like, I love the effort. But I personally can never drink or eat something from an Uber. So the guy straight up will be like, if you need water, it's right here. And you go, not going to get me today, sir. I'm not that easy. Like, yeah, good try. Maybe the next girl will fall for that. See, I'm the kind of person where, like, at a party if I'm really thirsty and I see there's water, even if it's, like, been drinking from, I'm drinking it.

37:18I have my mom in my head saying, don't you dare pick that up. Also, I'm like, no one's roofing a water. I don't know. I mean, being roofied in an Uber is kind of the perfect crime. True. If you think about it and someone drinks it and they pass out in the Uber. There you go. If you were a waitress at a restaurant and someone, like, didn't finish their fries and you were really hungry, would you ever eat the fries when you bring it back? Okay. Okay, so you're not, like, psycho. Like, if I worked there, I was the waitress and I'm, like, in the kitchen and I, like, have the plate. Yeah, I'm not, like, a freak.

37:52Obviously, I would, like, have the fries. Even though their, like, dirty little hands was, like, all over it. I actually caused a little bit of a stir yesterday. Wait, why was I giving the Teen Vogue party?

38:06because i also just know it's gonna be like the most non-stirring thing

38:14that's so sad um my mom was singing jazz as she does and we're at this restaurant it was me and my dad at the bar chilling yeah and then suddenly this guy's like someone lost jewelry someone lost jewelry and he comes up to me and he's holding this like gem this it looks like a big, big diamond. Yeah. And he goes. Like ring? It was just like a gem. Yeah. And he's like, is this yours? And I was like, no, sir, it's not mine. He goes, it was right under you. And I was like, not mine. Thank you so much. Not my gemstone. I'm a peridot. That's not me. I'm like, sir, please leave me alone. I'm just my dad.

38:52And he goes, are you sure? And I look and I realize I had just threw on some Crocs and they had all these gibbets on them. One of the gibbets was like these gem gibbets. And I go, oh, that's my gibbets.

39:07And the guy goes, what? And I go, thank you. That's important. And I couldn't put it back. It's hard to put it. How did the gibbets come off? Who knows? So anyway, my Crocs caused quite a stir at the bar yesterday. But it looked like it was like. I have another reason why the Crocs caused quite a stir at the bar yesterday. They were. Also, how did they come up with the name gibbet? I didn't know what a gibbets was. I said, excuse you. And then they said, it's just like... They really popped off with the gibbets. They really popped off with their collaborations. And it's crazy because I haven't gotten any milk.

39:41Do you think I'm keeping us from getting a Croc Giggly Squad collab? You know, I didn't think about that. If anything, they have built in hilarious marketing. Because it could just be like a commercial about how you've gotten me to wear Crocs. And I've been like against it. I think they've pitched it and you said no. Oh. I feel like what if Hannah convinced Paige and you go... Do you know what I want to pitch Crocs? Yeah. A Croc with a pointed toe. That sounds so fucking ugly. I can't even. But their whole thing, I think, though, is like... Having wide feet. Oh, is that? I don't know. But it's shaped as your foot is, which is...

40:22Like, it goes out. And all these shoes that make your feet turn in, it's like when they... I don't align with you on this struggle It's the patriarchy I'm literally almost done with my refresher I'm still in my mango pineapple refresher BS What are you drinking? I always get That's blueberry? With lemonade Very good shade today It kind of matches your nails Yes it does Are we doing red now? Is it time? No I'm almost done with red Jacqueline comes next week These puppies are gone And we'll see them next year Maybe one time in this spring I got French so it means I could have a French for like two years.

40:58No one can tell. It just grows out. I'm looking at my notes. I did say I need to see T-Pain live. Is that coming across your TikTok at all? No, that's not coming across my notes. My TikTok is all T-Pain. He's like dancing like amazing. I just feel like his - He says that he's low-key like the best singer. Yeah, I think his concerts are like insane. Chris is nodding. Are you a big T-Pain guy? I've seen some of the T-Pain concerts. It's good stuff. Chris and I actually have the same algorithm. Yeah, I feel like you guys do have a very similar algorithm. You have a 26-year-old man's algorithm. A hundred percent.

41:29That makes actually so much sense. The other day, my algorithm got almost, like, too girly. Like, I was like, how many skincare routines can I fucking watch? Well, you haven't been looking at my messages. And so then I went and looked at your messages and got my algorithm back to, like, a lovely place. I was like, hello, give me a couple humor jokes. Whenever Des looks at my TikTok, he goes, why do you have so many more tits than me on your TikTok? And I'm like, sorry, it's just beautiful women being funny and cool. And his is about hip mobility. But that's just his age. That's just his age showing.

42:07Your best friend wore a dress that I wore. Hailey Bieber wore this black dress that I wore to Las Culturistas. So we're basically sisters. Where'd she wear it? I don't know. No, she wore it to the Kylie Jenner something. Did she wear the hat? No, she didn't. Well, there was a theme for Las Culturistas that nobody did, so that's why I was wearing the hat, and it's like a whole thing. I've been forgotten about it, but anyway, I digress. I saw the Met America. The Gala. Gala. Academy. Academy. Of the Americas. Of America Society Museum. Geographic. I told you correctly. That's what it was. When all these celebrities go to, like, one thing and you're like, oh, they've all been going for years.

43:02You're like, I've never heard of this. Well, they were saying it's, like, the Met Gala of the West Coast. And I was like, okay, rebrand. Wait, that is exactly the name of it, though. Yeah, yeah, that's it. We can't get it again. The charity of the gala of the museums. Were there any outfits that you were, like, into or the vibes? What are you thinking about the state of fashion?

43:21As someone who's just cleaned her closet. So you're in a refresh palette right now. People were really hating on Kim Kardashian. Did you see she had that covered face? Kim Kardashian is so cunt because, one, we all knew it was her. Do you know how good your branding has to be to show up without your face and people go, that's Kim K? Yes! She's won! She's won. Honestly, when we did Vanity Fair, I didn't even see Kim K walk in, and I felt her presence. I was like, Kim Kardashian is here. That was cunt with a K. and then she the Schiaparelli everyone's talking but everyone's talking about Kim yeah and then the jewels were insane also like I wonder does she have full glam under or do you think she said yes she did because she was taking it was a dinner so she knew she was like taking that off at some point gonna take it off okay what'd you say about Schiaparelli she wore that she wore Schiaparelli dress to her premiere of that show which I can't wait for that to come out yeah really really good what is that what is it something all something something corsets are back.

44:23Yeah. I feel like we're reclaiming them. From the Victorians.

44:34I mean like sitting in a No, I actually do you remember that lime green corset that you had that you literally wore everywhere? Wait, why do I not remember? Are you kidding? You had a lime green corset. Are you kidding? It ruined my life and you can't remember it? You wore this lime green corset from Amazon everywhere. You wore it with green pants. You wore it with silver pants. You wore it with jeans. I've seen this. So you bringing up corsets right now is actually really triggering. That era was crazy. When windbreaker pants were trending, I was scared for my life because I was like, Hannah's thrown out all of her pants.

45:12She only windbreaks. She's a windbreaker now. She only breaks wind. Like there's nothing else she's doing but going outside and breaking wind. It's a great pan for farts. I posted a TikTok, which I've been, I'm getting back on my TikTok era. Because people are making fun of millennials for putting LOL at the end of sentences. And I realized I do beginning and end. Like I do a LOL sandwich. You have anxiety. Yeah. End the video. Not me just redoing my TikTok video. but I was like it's like an emotional um blanket emotional blanket security blanket security blanket but that if you're making fun of someone for putting lol before after like you didn't live through 9-11 and Gen Z can't say anything about it because they weren't even no like they don't have any they like are reading about it do you want to know what I think it is I think millennials are such like people pleasers in general where Gen Z isn't.

46:13Yeah, Gen Z will just stare at you like thinking about something else even though you ask them like a very straightforward question. Yeah. Where like if I don't say LOL at the beginning of my text, that means I did not acknowledge your presence. I don't give you credit. I think our generation of parents were so not like disregarded as children, but they had such freedom as children where it was like, yeah, and be home before sex. like they could do whatever the fuck they wanted so that like them raising us they're like and here's everything you'll ever need and then we are we the ones having gen z no i think we it's because we invented lol it's like don't tell me i can't use lol we invented lol t9 i actually had some gen z college girls dm me and say we are playing flip cup and i said thank you for doing the research that matters thank you for the research that matters i got a couple of those too which is really good I think it was more for the bit so we don't need those details actually it was funnier to think that like they didn't I love thinking that but there are going to be everyone's studying at college but I do think some games do get lost in translation and it's sad I I have some shows that I watched with my husband I can't believe you just brought him up on the pod no should we take it out what shows wait did you watch that Netflix documentary um about the woman in Florida that gets shot through the door?

47:38That's on my list. Well, it's because Des was home, and he goes— That's so good. You have to watch. He says verbatim, watch that documentary stuff when I'm not here. So I watched Task with him that everyone's into. Everyone's talking about it. No, they love Task because the guys are hot in it, and they have their Philadelphia accents. They say, water. Are those particularly sought after accents? I wouldn't say they're sought after But like the hoes Get the hoes Some water in the hoes The hame Are you coming home? Is that Philly? I would have said that's like Minnesota It's Philly Minnesota's more like Oh yeah Yeah Wait I didn't realize that like Pennsylvania Like they really have an accent Yeah and it's cool But anyway The further you go down The scarier it gets That's what I tell my husband

48:37Speaking of Speaking of Have you seen As two Italian girls Have you seen the bush thong? It's Why are people like Yeah Online being like Why are you doing the bush thong? Obviously it's a bit Yeah obviously it's like It's just to get attention Like a novelty thing Yeah it's like funny too And people are like Trying to like get to the bottom of it I'm serious. Let's have, let's. Wait. Let's be camp. I actually did wear my nipple bra out last night. Where? South. The library. Dunkin' Donuts. I went out to dinner. And I told everyone, I said, I have a nipple bra on. Have you wanted to get your nipple pierced before?

49:20Did you see the newsletter where I put them nipple covers in that are pierced? Yeah. I'm pretty freaked out. Neither of you guys brought it up. Yeah, because we were fucking scared. I saw them on Amazon She literally looked at me and she goes did you see what page I go yeah I saw what you want to do and she goes should we say something I'm like I don't know I think I just pretend it didn't happen and go for it because it was fucking rage bait it was rage bait I'm not like I was having a day and then I saw that and I said I don't need this shit right now I said she's mocking me she's coming for me in some way why is that coming for you you know it's just like you know I don't need that like also there's only room for one psycho person on like this is the newsletter you pick something nice and chic and pretty and i pick something off color and then you post that and i said everything's off i don't like this i don't i'm not gonna because look it's like if you give someone attention for doing something bad they like it and they do it again yeah and that's because i'm such a goody two-shoes it's really off-brand for me like i would never get my nipples pierced.

50:25Also, I have like a phobia of like... I looked into it for a while.

50:37Your mom, your poor mom, like she's making a rosary. She's like, where did I go wrong? I wait for her every day. I have a fear that if you... You can't. You are everyone's dream child. You had a fear of what? You were going to get like an infection? No, I have a fear that I would be paralyzed. Oh my God. Paralyzed? That's so fucking crazy. Why? I thought that like your nipple would lose feeling. Oh, that can happen. Yeah, that actually can happen. I think. And then there was a time where I thought it was cool to get your inner ear pierced. It's called like a... Oh, yeah. It's called... It has a stupid name.

51:30It's like Icarus or something. What is this called? Shoot, that's going to really annoy me. What is that called? Conk. Chris, look this up. Conk? Like a seashell? I don't know. How do we even describe it? It's called... It's that inner ear thing. Trachea. No, that's your throat. Tragus. which sounds like a labia sounds like something in the vagina that men don't know what it is I really wanted to get my tragus pierced for like a week and I did all the research Queen tragus I'm like I think my tragus is inflamed I really was like what is I'm sorry there's like 12 different names for these things there's a diagram it's tragus It's Dragas.

52:19I think it is. So I read that if it goes wrong, it could fuck up your balance. Oh. And I was like, well, then I won't go pro as a tennis player. And my dad would be so mad at me. Turns out, could have done it. Turns out, could have pierced it a couple times. Yeah, could have used it as an excuse. So I didn't get it for that reason. But yeah, I have a phobia. Also, I really want to get, I mean, you know I love a what's it called? Ear cough. Ear cough. But I realized if you get it like permanent, you like can't sleep on that side. Like if you get your cartilage pierced? Yeah, like it'll hurt. Like those little things will ruin my life.

52:58I agree. I have heard that cartilage hurts because like it's so thick there. Because I try to nap a lot with an ear cuff and I have to take off the ear cuff to nap. Well, of course. I have sensory issues. 100%. Like I never sleep in earrings, rings, jewelry, anything. If I'm trying to sleep and I decide I need to flip over and I can't flip over because of my ear, I'm calling the police on myself. Also, some earrings really poke you. They're really a sharp back. Someone invented a nap earring, which is very niche, but it hasn't been tested by me yet. We need to test it. Mom tested, kid approved.

53:40If you get married one day, you're going to take off your rings before you go to sleep. Ooh. What a good question. What a good question. Hannah, honestly, I might. I recommend it. I think that's why I have, like, bacterial infection. Because I really can't sleep in any. Like, I could sleep in rings and bracelets. I'm never sleeping in necklaces or earrings. Yeah. I actually used to live in a necklace. Like, I'd put on a necklace, and I'm like, this is me until it, like, falls off. I can't. I think I wore the same necklace like all high school, college. Was it a Tiffany Hart? No, it was like a little tennis racket.

54:21Oh my gosh. You just called me a nerd under your breath. No, I said oh my gosh. Wait, I did something I think you'd find relatable. Okay. So I bought this face care thing of one of those masks that you put on that you wake up and it's like you peel it off. Yeah. The second I put it on, it dried up and I felt so dry. I don't want to say it. No, say it. MediCube. Wait, you did it wrong. You must have done it wrong. You take, okay, so you take it out of the package. No, it's not. It's literally just lotion. Oh, the one that comes out of the squeeze bottle. Yeah. Okay, yeah, you put it on. And then it immediately, like, I felt so dry.

55:00Yeah. And they were, like, you have to sleep in it. And then the morning you pull it off or whatever. But, like, after 20 minutes, I, like, had a freak out. And I washed it off. Maybe you're allergic to it. I think my skin's just too dry. Why don't you just get, why don't, why did you even get that one? That's too high level for you. You have to get, just get the other one. Okay. They're really good. You're going to love it. Okay. Your mom should get them too. Oh, you have to come for my family.

55:30Don't talk about my family. Thank you for giggling with us guys. Thank you for being here while we worked some things out. Yeah, I think we figured some stuff out. Congratulate Paige on her popping her Botox cherry, her new face. If she looks different, don't tell her. Just be like, you look the same. No, literally, don't tell me. No, you look amazing. Thank you. You really do look amazing. You just look awake. Yeah. Which, honestly, we've never looked like. Like, what's it like being awake right now? My whole brand is now changed. Yeah. Oh, my God. You have to change Daphne completely to, like, running wear.

56:08she goes we're doing marathons in Daphne now I'm going to Wisconsin this weekend in Madison Green Bay so you guys there get tickets and thank you Duncan for supporting this episode of Giggly Squad