Giggling about boy moms, being amish, and brazilian waxes

0:15Okay, we got a recommendation from Paige on this one. welcome my glendale gigglers my people it's like an old kardashian reference i always forget to sometimes pick up my microphone yeah yep your little pink microphone we're back baby we got our dunkin refreshers we're back we're a little late we had a snowstorm things were happening i'd like to jump right in with some things that have annoyed me thus far in my week I love this because literally when I tell you we've been holding back the two episodes a week is giving me life I've never had more shit to say get on it I actually think it's making me more present in my everyday life because I'm like I'll be talking to someone I'll be like sorry can you repeat that because I'm going to talk about it on my podcast no the amount of times I don't respond to someone and just start writing in my notes app and they're like are you okay I'm like this is going to be perfect for something I can't get into it right now I'm curating content for the i also have a small surprise for you like when we get into it like not even a surprise like something i need to read to you anyway first and foremost on my docket like i have a surprise i can read continue she's like i figured out a sentence i sounded out some words and you know it forms a sentence somebody said to me the other day like oh the how to giggle book and i go the

1:38what they go the book you wrote i go oh the book my friend wrote yeah you mean last year you mean last year i'm talking about 2026 baby that was last fiscal year i've moved on um my first gripe because i think it happened like right after we recorded last week did you see the live climber I knew you were gonna say that Get out of my head Get out of my head So I'm with Alec Colbert on the road And we're waiting to go on stage And she goes Oh this guy's like climbing And we put it on in the green room Of course Every girl is just like Go to therapy Every girl is like The things men do Instead of going to therapy What were your thoughts?

2:24I thought it should be illegal First of all I thought this seems like a huge liability for netflix they just bought another company this guy dies it's all good it's all done no and at the end he's just standing on top of it and i'm like at any moment he could sneeze a bird could hit him in the head like also if he were to die i mean i guess they had like i guess they'd cut the camera it must have been delayed a little yeah but like that would have traumatized a generation when he got to the top i go now how's he getting in the building that's what i was like is there a helicopter how's he getting down also the things men do to not take care of their family like spend some quality time with your children and then having his wife watch like he's at war or something was strange there are men that will literally throw a fit if their wife goes on like a girl's weekend and this man's like hey babe um so i might die tomorrow you're good with the kids though right like what the fuck i wonder if they asked the wife like can you watch if she was like no i have a family to take care of i can't watch my husband like rock climb i think there was one like soundbite that she gave that she was like yeah like he said he talked about this when we were dating i didn't think it was serious i thought it was a bit it was a joke um no the things that men will truly do to not just speak to someone who went to school to become a professional psychiatric helper is crazy like call your mom call your dad talk some of these like childhood things through i also anyone call call up your nearest pizza delivery person have a quick chat and figure it i mean this i just i could i actually was so mad watching it at one point i i go turn it off turn it off i hope this guy fucking fault i was so pissed well i hate to say it we have no connection to this man so i don't know who i'm waiting for is he is he the villain did he do something wrong and he's trying to escape is this godzilla like what are we watching here here's the other thing i felt like a mom because i was like okay now if my child turned on netflix clicked this and then all of the sudden thought he could scale our home i'd be livid and god forbid the guy fell and my child is sitting there like huh like i just thought it was such a weird are trying to like climb their dresser right now and it's like this we don't need it was a weird flex on netflix's part but like it also is annoying me because it did well so people love fame so next thing the men are gonna like phenomenally there's gonna be weird shit doing like i'm gonna go underwater for 72 hours no like let's just practice empathy let's practice empathy love thy neighbor let's practice empathy as a country let's like let's calm the fuck down also you know that when she was first dating him he was like talking off his ass like i love climbing and she was like cool i love a guy with a goal and passion you know a hobby loves you will yeah like you see a challenge and you and you know she was sitting there like how the fuck did we get here like she was thinking about that other guy on hinge who was like i'm not really outdoorsy and at first she thought it was boring and now she's like that would have been nice i could have been with a shoe salesman like i could have been with someone normal stop pretending you're outdoorsy on these apps we know you don't like mosquitoes we know yeah you like a sunset that doesn't mean you want to go camping let's just be up front in the beginning because that could be you this is a warning you know what's funny i was talking to one of my friends the other day and she was like oh like yeah like i did the half marathon and then like one of my other friends was there and was like wow like how how long did you do it like how long was your mile and she was like oh like i think it was like nine minutes and i go guys you know i've never ran a mile and humble brag and they looked at me you know if you believe it you can do it how like like our high school didn't do it i didn't i didn't join any organized sports so who's telling me to run a mile i've made you walk a mile before against your will that's different that's a trick tricked me I mean like I've never gotten dressed and been like I'm going to run watch me run well famously running a mile was my most traumatic event in college and I promise not to run a time mile since and I've been able to do that so if you guys want hope and you want to look towards like something that's motivational and inspiring Paige and I both haven't run ran a mile in a long can I guess what your mile was at your height of like your peak athleticism well this is a sports podcast let's go don't get me going girl this is my shit let's go wait i've been waiting my whole life i'm gonna say at your peak you could run one mile sprint in like four minutes and 30 seconds okay that's insane is it so under four minutes is like the best the way i love you so much you're like well you're my best friend you're strong you're fast okay not to get into my dark past but after you have tennis season we all have a summer free and you can stay at the school and train but some not all of us do do and then i did my first season like freshman and then i was i did that sounds traumatizing so when you come back the coach isn't just like welcome back guys he's like so what'd you guys do all summer and are you ready to play and we're like what do you mean and he it's like survivor and he's like okay we're all gonna do the mile test and if you if you run um more than seven minutes you're not making the team so you're immediately up for an elimination more than seven minutes yeah so if you run over seven minutes you not qualify for your scholarship so my fastest was 6 15 which for like a a sprinter that's pretty good and famously my friend was puking in the bathroom after so i went in i started puking the whole team started puking and that's a trauma bond that you can never undo and it's women supporting women and we all felt so light and skinny afterwards it was truly amazing you would have loved it um that i would love so yeah no i can't i don't ever that's why like when any anyone's ever like oh my god you're gonna be on traders or like you should do i'm like i'm not running for someone else my thing like i've lived a lot of lives and i'm like i've i've done this shit and the amount of messages i got from the last episode of me explaining the nuances of tennis like um rudeness to you made me realize like like also i was on a team with seven girls who had to play against each other like this was this was torture this was torture but speaking of traitors i watched the first episode well i fell asleep but i like started the season i watched the first episode yeah it's so much funnier now that i know the colton lore to go back and like be starting the season because in the very first episode he kind of says here's the thing with here's my thing with like men that I think you are so locked in on Colton you're like you're not getting away from me bitch you're not getting away from me okay I don't even know Cassie but I stand with her um here's my one thing that I've learned over my many years of dating that I used to like overlook in men this also would i would say goes for friendships too if someone has to repeatedly tell you who they are yeah it's a quick lesson that that is not who they are not like that's who they want to be and they like probably try and be that version of themselves but that is not them like if you're dating a guy and he's like i'm a really nice guy i'm just a nice guy i'm a really said you weren't why are you saying that to me i'm just you know i'm just stupid i i get myself in these i i don't it's like no you're evil you're manipulative and i've you're and i've caught you every guy that says they're a good guy is evil continue just in the first episode he's going up to like find out if he's a traitor or not and i don't even know what cast member says it like oh you're like you're laughing so much like i wonder what you got what you are like traitor or faithful And he says, I'm just a happy guy.

11:15You'll learn that. I'm just I'm in a good mood. And then that was scary. I actually got chills when he said that. Because first of all, no one's happy. Let's just get that. No one's happy. You're at work. Period. No one's happy. You're a fucking liar. You're a fucking liar. No one's been happy in the history of civilization. You're a liar. Then when he goes, everyone says, like, how did you like play in the NFL? First of all, you barely played in the NFL. second he was like people think like oh i'm so big and mean how did i hit people we know what are you talking about yeah you stalk someone that's the i rather you be in the nfl get cte because you got hit so many times than ever stalk anyone you literal freak anyway i don't even know if i can continue because he makes me so angry and here's another thing and this is the last thing i'll say you ever like meet a girl and like people will say like this is only a phrase for women because people hate women but where they'll be like she has crazy girl eyes like you ever meet a girl and you're like oh yeah now i usually make that person my best friend because i'm like you're a little bit crazy i was about to say that's the only people i surround myself with because i'm about to have a good time like you're a little bit nuts i'd like to see what you do he has crazy guy eyes like he has the eyes where you're like oh like you'll slit my throat he's scary anyhow and so i hope you guys are enjoying traitors i hope you guys are loving it also on a lighter note i we've decided that if you want to name your baby and you're confused you dm page i realize i i've had it maybe once before it's too much responsibility for me like i feel like that's too much of a heavy burden for me to carry yeah um i'm gonna be honest the pages though they come pretty they're coming to me with prepared pretty good names i would say there's a handful of times where i'm like i don't we gotta start i don't at the drawing board again i don't know if that's flowing the way you think it's flowing but but most you don't know these people she could be like that was my like dead grandma's name sometimes we'll say in parentheses family name i have to and i'm like okay yes i feel like a lot of boy moms have in their head who they think their son should end up with and it's this like mythical creature i got hit with this in my like mid-20s it was the first time ever i'd had like a boyfriend where me and the mom didn't like vibe and i feel like my first boyfriend ever his mom set the precedent of like this is how mom should be and they and she was so cool so i never had an issue with moms then i was like 24 25 and i dated this guy and one time we were out to dinner with his family and we had a waitress like a normal girl waitress and she would come over to the table and do her job and the mom looked at my boyfriend and said the waitress is stunning isn't she and then like would hit him oh you almost theresa judice i remember turning and being like what the fuck come to find out i remember learning that she thought that i like was not good enough for him whatsoever that she felt like I was like uneducated and I was like wait till I go on a reality show you stupid bitch it was like my first time ever seeing a mom hate you just because you're dating their son and it's a slippery slope I feel like with moms there's three different directions the first one is you meet the mom and you go that's why he likes me yes she's she's that girl she's me i would have been friends with her we are friends actually i prefer her to him actually me and her complaining about him actually like i love this woman i will text her after we break up so you're kind of like oh i love this because i see what he sees in me because he loves his mom two some guys are trying to break familial trauma where you meet his mom And you realize you're the opposite of his mom.

15:30And he's rebelling against her to be like, I don't want this in my life anymore. And you might be more like his dad. I don't know. But he might be trying to break. R.I.P. Des's mom. Yeah. Do you think you're similar to Des's mom? Well, I actually think Des and his mom are very similar. And that's why I would have loved her. Got it. Like she is him. Like I am like my dad. and also no i just all the time i'm like which she would have left me and he's like i don't know he's like holds it over my head he's like she wouldn't like that you didn't fucking do your bed this morning i'll tell you that she wouldn't like you getting all chatty in the whatever she he can use it against me but um so then there is the mom the yeah and then lastly there's the mom who is like just not like you don't connect at all and you go oh he's chosen wrong like he's picked wrong and like he's into me for whatever reason but I'm not his his end person because like I don't fit in with this family but there are so many families that you might not fit in with but he's like breaking the cycle of whatever family issues there are families are fucking complicated complicated the beckhams right the beckhams it's crazy i do want to say i got a dm of a gorgeous giggler who had and i'm in the dms you know especially on tour she rescued three kittens two were white and one is like white and black and she was like hannah what do i name them long brainstorming session we came up with sesame for the black and white one and then ricotta and coconut okay sounds like a horrible recipe that would taste disgusting but cute names like a chopped recipe well this is the thing also you guys when you send me your kitten names i need to know about you i need to know where you're from what's the vibe i can't just give you cute names i wanted to register you have to give hannah like a little background yeah because i'll go off i need to know something that connects with you also in my travels i did something super fucking embarrassing this girl stops me at the airport giggler and has the cutest dog and as you know we love dogs if they're cute if they're cute it's like men if they're cute i like them so they make me laugh the dog the dog has this scarf around its neck accessorized gorgeous and i go oh my god it's this woman like a cartoon woman and i go is that judge judy around his neck i go that is iconic and she goes no that's ruth bader ginsburg

18:18it looked like okay you know what from the side that profile in a cartoon what i just came in so confident where i was like fuck yeah judge judy we love judge judy and i was trying to be cool like she's having such a fun interaction with me and she was like you dumbass read a book like what kind of feminist icon are you ready to fuck? And I was like, love your dog. I gotta go. Love your work, Ruth. If one of your goals for 2026 is to be healthier, then why don't we kick off the new year with AG1? One scoop of AG1 supports energy, digestive regularity, immune defense, and a healthy mood. So you'll be ready to take on whatever your 2026 resolution list is.

19:01And if you're a little late on your new year's resolutions, there's no right time. You can start AG1 whenever you want. AG1 truly is the next generation of healthy daily drinks. It's clinically shown to support gut health and fill in common nutrient gaps. With 75 plus ingredients, including five probiotic strains, AG1 replaces the need for a multivitamin, probiotic, and more. So through our link, get a free AG1 flavor sampler and AGZ sampler to try all the flavors, plus free vitamin D3 plus K2 and AG1 welcome kit. so my episode came episode came out last night yeah of martha stewart she's she's exactly she's exactly what you want her to be and what you think she's going to be was she disappointed in you yeah yeah yeah like you didn't do anything but like overall overall she was like you could tighten it up you could figure it out like i feel like i feel like she was see i love she was like 10 minutes away from being like i could hang out with you for a week and i'd have your shit all in line like like i don't like people that immediately meet you and they're like i'm obsessed with you i love you i'm like you don't know me first of all second of all i know there's room for improvement give me notes she was this close to looking at me and being like why am i here i felt that and i was like and i stand with you in her documentary her parents were really critical of her and she's very critical but that's why she's so successful in what she does well i actually was so in awe of her because she's just like she's a legitimate entrepreneur powerhouse of a woman like she walks into a room and everyone straightens up i've never been on an amazon set where things have run as smoothly as they did the day martha stewart was there i was like you go oh so you guys are capable guys whoa like people were running down the hall i'm like whoa whoa whoa they're like do you want lunch i'm like when do we when do we get lunch all of a sudden

21:14no i gave you frisee yeah i was like they were like we have caviar in the break room i'm like what no there's there's danish scones being prepared right out of the oven i was so nervous to do it and then what i didn't anticipate what because like obviously in bed with pages like it's fun it's cheeky like we're not i'm not asking like hard-hitting questions by any means but I wasn't anticipating her asking me things back like questions back so we're so there was this moment where I was wait she loved you she loved you I don't know that means she loved you or she was just interrogating I think she was just like well I'm here to do a job let's do the job like goodbye or she's like who am I in bed with right now no one told me so there was this moment where I was like asking her about like sheets and like all like I was like how often do you as one does how often do you change your sheets and she was like well first of all i don't change my own sheets you actual nimrod she was like well my housekeeper changes them every two to three days and i was like oh my god that's a lot and then she like turns and is like well how often are you changing your sheets and i was like very i was very confident with my answer i was like well i do it once a week and she was it was as if i had leprosy like i was the most contagious i was patient zero she was like once a week once a week this is so good because the way martha would have hated me wait till you get a load of my best friend you go wait till i gotta make a wish project next she'll be going through wait once a week is like i thought good overboard it's overboard she looks at me and she goes you're rich enough to have your housekeeper because then she was like you're i go my housekeeper comes once every two weeks to do like a deep clean also housekeeper strong word we have apartments i have crown molding hannah she goes you're rich enough to have your housekeeper come once a week like i literally feel like she looked at me and was like you're dirty you're dirty but it was phenomenal it's good but for you need to every now and then have someone you know she insulted me no less than four times and she was right like every time she should you know you're right no you're right oh it's giving it's giving like gymnastics coach like i'm obsessed with that energy and also like maybe you do you're ready to step up like you're not the page in her 20s let's martha stewart this shit one of my biggest revelations though i was like oh my god i can't wait to hear her answer i was like what when you want to like order food and not cook like what are you ordering she goes i i've never done that i go friday night you've never ordered a pizza she goes why would i why would i order pizza and i just was i was so flabbergasted i couldn't even get through because i couldn't have you read one of my books she was like i have an insane garden if i want a pizza i'll make a pizza anywho she's my we have to do page try to be martha stewart i'm like i'm obsessed with her like the attention she commands when she walks into a room and like the level of detail that she's like no do it i'm like yeah i'm obsessed can i also say when i meet an iconic person like that and they are good at listening and they ask me questions they're always the best people because so many people just talk at you especially in like the entertainment industry so when you're talking to someone who you know they don't even need to be there right and they take the time to hear what you're saying I'm like oh they're smart like they're still learning at whatever age they're at they want to know what the kids are doing they want to learn about different industries so anyway Martha shout out to you we love you I wanted to bring up when she said that that woman died The journalist but she's not in fact dead She's just dead to Martha Like I wanted to bring that up But I was just like I don't know if I should Like I'm not at that level with you yet But like I think about it at least once a week That's the problem with like as a comic Interviewing really famous people Because one wrong question And the PR is like And you're done we'll never talk to you again So it's this like thin line Do you want to know where I've been bombing recently?

25:43Bombing. What? The elevator. And usually I can do a quick elevator joke to anyone. Yeah. And then you leave on a high note. You don't have a follow up. You leave on a high. What's the thing, babe? I don't know. We need to write some jokes for you. We need new material. We need to do a writer's room. Now look, I got into an elevator the other day. Man standing there had a dog. Okay. Woman walks in to the elevator. She also has a dog. I'm not even in the convo woman says to the man. So cute. He goes, thank you. I go. She was talking to the dog. They both looked. I go, sorry, this is my floor. I was mortified.

26:28I was like, guys, laugh. That's funny. Have a little crowd. OK, have a good night. I'm here till Wednesday. Get out of there. I've crossed the line. My apologies. That was that was kind of highbrow humor. It was quick. it was a misdirection on it and a little dad jokey i thought you were gonna say i thought you're gonna say thanks to oh you're talking about the dog see that's a i see that was just bad audience i was like i'm doing elevator like guys you know anyway i have such a wide range of personality and elevators i'm either like deathly anxious staring forward and like people everyone seems like they're standing too close to you and you're just like this is the most awkward thing I've ever done in my life or I'm with my friend like so passionate about a conversation I'm not even aware there's people around and I'm like yeah because Paige get yeast Paige gets yeast infections if she has like anxiety if she's overworking herself which like I've had too when you overwork yourself it comes out through your body and it can be your vulva and and then there's the like someone tries to laugh with me and I'm not really in the mood but I'm like good enough to be like okay we'll have a little back and forth but like let's not make this a daily yeah you know um i haven't brought it up in a long time but i i just feel like the giglers need to know my recent experience i have a grandpa story we were having such a nice time and now you're gonna cry but like i did eight cities in 11 days i'm tired and i was in seattle the last night and i get to the hotel and when i tell you i put the tv on blasting immediately passed out thank god i set an alarm at like to wake up i wake up and i have all these missed calls from my husband which that's terrifying i don't know is it oh i was like he's he was probably like oh i guess the ketchup's missing again when you're just like yeah he's something's going on over there but it's definitely not important um he also he's so cute he like is afraid that i will oversleep for a show which knock on woods never happened so every now and then he'll call me i'm like what's up and he's like are you getting ready yet and i'm like okay yeah i've gotten this like are you on your bronzer step yet so i call him he's like are you using primer i'm like you know i don't use primer do you not use primer i mean i put moisturizer on gotta get the milk grip primer it's truly the best is that the green one yeah it's in like a iridescent-y bottle it's the best primer i don't want to go anywhere that my makeup needs to last more than two hours if that's the case like i should be there you are oily and you of anyone you should be using a primer and that's for when you told me squad and that's for when you told me that i would use any trend okay that video the there was the funniest comment someone goes only your worst enemy or your best friend could say this and that's what giggly squad is your worst enemy or your literal sister could say this to you yeah and you also you got shot and then you said but thank you for that wound because i've grown from it i've been maimed but not killed thank you what i've been what i've been maimed means like you're hurt but you're still alive i'm stealing that i'm that's exactly how i felt i've been maimed but i'm not killed okay keep going so i call des back and he's like what have you been doing and i'm like mama's sleeping mama's working mama's busy and he's like well i've been at a social gathering and there's an older man here who says he knew jerry burner and i said babe i have to get ready in 10 minutes for a show i can't do this he goes please just get on the phone with this guy and the guy's like hello he goes i the situation you went to school find yourself in are truly remarkable he goes i i coached basketball in brooklyn and i battled you know a lot of you know i was a social rights activist and your grandpa was at the top of it and he changed me as a person and he's the greatest guy i ever met and i love jerry so much and i i can't believe i'm talking to his granddaughter now you're fully sobbing sobbing sobbing a sweet old man telling me how my grandpa was such a great person because sometimes i'll tell myself like you're literally making him to be bigger than he is like he was a normal guy like stop being sad about it and now i'm like no he was literally my everything and then i'm like did he tell do you know i'm his favorite i'm his favorite and he's like that's not important i'm just telling you my experience how did des even happen upon this convo well he's with a bunch of like old guys as they do they find each other and the guy was just saying like i used to coach basketball in brooklyn he's like do you know this guy jerry burner oh my god jerry burn like it's so crazy the world can be so small so mind you it's 5 45 i take 20 minutes to do my makeup when you guys see me walk out on stage i'd been sleeping about 35 minutes before that and when i got on stage that's my prime time like 7 p.m i'm ready to fucking go but so 5 45 i'm sobbing and not like a a beautiful one tear like kim kardashian crying like i'm like heaving every memory is coming back i because you know i've been suppressing it for a while because everyone told me to stop crying over it which was valid but i've been holding it down i also haven't talked to a psychic recently so i'm like this is my grandpa talking through this guy to be like hen i love you and i miss you and don't forget that i'm that bitch and maybe he didn't like that i talked about nana so much on the last pod and he's like okay remember like me too i don't know like you can like truly ask the universe for like signs like like i really feel like you could be like grandpa give me a sign and it has to be like so specific and like things like that happen oh so i'm sobbing i'm sweating because i just woke up from a like four hour nap there's lines on my face i actually fell asleep with a bun which you know is a bad idea because then it's all crimped and crazy the car is picking me up and never put your hair in a bun no something was going on oh because i put a mask wait i do know that like i don't think i've ever seen you like in a bun no like you only do a ponytail even to sleep you're either hair down you're actually when you sleep you're always hair down which is another i'll do messy bun if i'm hot but i'm not committing to it like i'll take it out real quick i've seen you when you're hot and i've never seen a messy bun i've literally here's wait this is crazy i don't even know how you do your messy buns like i don't know the way your wrist goes like i couldn't recreate it you're like i don't know who you are and everything's been a lie up until this point now that i'm thinking i really you only ever do a ponytail if you're like i do love a ponytail it's because you guys i love myself so much one note don't love the shape of my face i love everything about myself except my general personality how i look so when i put it in a bun I feel like everyone's like whoa there's her head like it's just too much head and face that's why like I don't do a fucking slick back bun I do a slick back pony okay like no but like everyone has their thing do you ever claw clip you could start claw clipping yeah except I like to lay down I like to sit and claw clips are not good I know there's something going around like claw clip for girls again i support women is that a new club it's like a thing where like it you can like put your head back with the clip but again i digress also people don't talk about what best friends do like they say oh when you're having multiple conversations on different apps people don't talk about when you're having multiple conversations on the same text chain where you're literally like both answering multiple things at the same you know what i mean where you answer one story continue telling another story tell a new topic and the person's also responding like that's my flow state and think we can't run the country i just had seven conversations in one in 10 minutes and like we are we are knocking it out oh so yeah that is my prime time flow state i do want to say one thing because i just like i feel different i feel better than people i feel like i've been reading my book and when i say reading what page are you i'm on I'm like 130.

34:59Have you been reading it the right side up? I've been reading it while simultaneously comprehending it. Are you highlighting? I'm not highlighting because I'm like, I'm not crazy. When are you reading? Like what part of the day? I'm going to tell you. So like this morning I woke up like early, like 6.45, 7 a.m. And I'm like, okay, I'm not getting out of bed. And typically I'll go on TikTok, like I'll scroll. I'll like look at my apps, look at my email. I like read for like 20 minutes in the morning and then like before bed like instead of scrolling tiktok I'll like read get really sleepy and then like throw something on the tv and then like immediately fall asleep and I'm like I have a frontal lobe and she's there she's do you know what that's called Amish that's so crazy you just fully Amish that's so crazy you just said that the show i put on last night was called suddenly amish yeah and you're about to get it's on hbo and it's normal people thinking maybe they want to be amish so they go test it out we're so alive that's genius that's so that's so scary no because i was honestly like amishness amicia what do they call it i'm a i'm a shot i'm in whatever it's i'm into it they're on Well, they said that their people are.

36:27Besides, like, I have a couple of notes, small, small notes. The younger generations are leaving the Amish community. And so they're really dwindling. And so they're trying. Do you understand what like a discussion would be when you're Amish? They'll be like, oh, like, well, first of all, I don't know if they know celebrities, but they'll be like, how much milk should we put in this recipe? And they're like, Google it. And they're like, we can't. And then like you just can't Google things like that. I mean, they don't have electricity. city they have to do candles i don't even think they have they don't even have scented candles maybe they do have scented no i'm sure they i'm sure they've mixed something lavender they mix something yeah you know what i would be interested in um like their hair care because they've got such long hair like tresemme should really wait you're so right no breakage no break breakage and they're going in braids too yeah like what shampoo and conditioner there's probably no heat they're not they're not using any heat they're not dyson air wrapping they don't even know what that is i wonder what they do for like face masks at night they probably use banana do they even know that face masking is a thing no some of them have phones and i feel like some of them are on tiktok there is one amish girl that i always get tagged with because people say we look alike so honestly we do it's pretty for the longest and i mean like probably till i was in high school i thought amish and mormon same thing and i mean it's like i mean there's a venn diagram yeah there definitely is a venn diagram they would if they would like each other more than they would like like us i would say anyway we're not getting into it resolutions come and go but real lasting growth takes time that's why i love that neutrophil isn't promising a miracle in 30 days.

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38:49For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter promo code Giggly. Find out why Nutrafol is the best-selling hair growth supplement brand at Nutrafol.com spelled n-u-t-r-a-f-o-l dot com promo code giggly that's Nutrafol.com promo code giggly I feel like this is the part of the episode where we always talk like people say we're not organized but we're actually super organized it's just like organized chaos this is when I bring up my one inappropriate like poop yeah like something that you did in public that like should be illegal yeah let's not to brag but i found the one place i don't fart this seems like a riddle the one the one can you identify the one place that hannah burner doesn't fart like that i'm like this is actually inappropriate and i'm gonna hold you're gonna hold it okay not sex church but i'm like you haven't gone that would require going yeah the doctor's office no you let it definitely it's a it's fucking that's what they're here is that normal is that normal wait i need to think wait i really on a plane no you're wait no that's a plane you can get away with it so easy wait this is actually so you coded okay i'm gonna give you a clue okay The Kardashians talk about it.

40:20It's something you love to do. The Kardashians talk about it. It's something I love to do. Like, I hate it. And you're like. Glam. I would do it all the time. Glam. In the glam chair. Now, I'm going to explain to you guys what a glam chair is. You sit down. You know what a goddamn chair is. No, but like, you sit down and a lot of strangers surround you. Like, it's a makeup artist. They are on you. like there's no space and you're sitting and if you even like move a little bit it could throw them like you have to sit still yeah the makeup chair is the one place where i will hold my fart until the end they leave and then i like my body's like in turmoil because there's no if it comes out wrong like that's a that's like it's everyone's going down at the ship it's mean they're trying to do their job you can't blame it on one of them it's a form of waterboarding honestly and there's they don't want to be there no but if i were to fart and it smelled or like they heard it i i have to sit with them for another hour remember the girl that was selling her farts do you remember yeah what a time i feel like she also was lying a little bit also do you know where i'll fart this is so fucked up and like people might never look at me the same again.

41:43We're passing. I'll fart in an elevator. I'll fart in an elevator. I don't care. Because I believe karma. Karma works in mysterious ways and there's some people. You ever walk to an elevator and it smells like shit? You deserved it. You deserved it. That's just me passing it on. Wait, speaking of glam, I'm actually having like a real serious crisis. Oh no. So I had to do something for a hair brand the other day and I don't dye my hair. So they were like, oh she has like a couple grays and mitchell was like no problem i'll like throw a little i'll throw a little glaze on the glaze was the wrong color okay so the wait till you see me in person tomorrow it's not even doing it justice on here because we're virtual the top layer hannah of my hair is black i've been washing my hair multiple times a night with baking soda trying to get it i'm i think you think i'm exact that's so amish of you i have black hair i have black hair on the top and then the wait why couldn't he just like put some powder on top of it because they were like long he was like oh yeah i'll just like throw and so i texted him and i was like hey we need to fix my glaze i'm freaking i i look i look insane and no shade to anyone who dyes their hair black but if you dye your hair black what is your actual problem well it's it's giving like um the adams family i guess you know what i thought i was like i felt in the mirror i was like i look old like i i felt like it aged me and now i'm like oh now i understand why older women like do tend to go lighter like in their hair you're gonna say blue they're like give me a light purple let's go because i'm like i look so harsh and like and i love my color brown that's why i literally don't dye it yeah and so now it is crazy how like a guy could never tell the like slight hue of change i've tried to show her hair i've tried to show what i mean 8 000 times i'm like no open your eyes and look at this you got hair you're having a full mental breakdown that's your hair i go it's not my it's not my hair actually this is not my color hair well you know what this is this is karma because our second season of reality tv i started sprouting grays and page took it upon herself to mama monkey me and at the pool sit on top of me and yank out with a tweezer every single gray hair which is apparently rule number one with grays don't do that but and i knew that in my heart of hearts i was like definitely not supposed to do that but my best friend was having so much fun in that i love grooming i love grooming other people that's why you were like that's why i've dated i've dated so many male projects because i'm like oh give me 15 minutes with you and i'll just yeah if i just pop a couple pimples it's go time i also discovered something i've never done before and i don't know how i'm 34 and i haven't done this before but you know that you if you're in a rush and you're really greasy and because you haven't washed your hair in a bit that you could just wash the the front of your hair yeah well i have bangs so i've done that before but just like the crown it's called a hooker shower what's it called yeah you a hooker shower no that i could be making that up No, a hooker shower is when you just do your armpits.

45:25I thought it was like you just shave. Oh, I know this. I did this. Yeah, I thought it was like you just shave your vagina and then like use perfume. Oh, that makes sense, too. But yeah, you put your hair in a bun, but then you take out the front like you're about to do a. A slick back and then you just do shampoo, conditioner. and it was incredible because yeah like life has changed for me I think I could beat the patriarchy now oh god this is actually something that my friend Stephanie was like I can't believe you've never said this on the podcast because she was shocked when I said this to her she was like I think you're duping everyone she had said something and I was like oh I have to shave my vagina and she was like why would you have to shave your vagina and I'm like what do you what do you mean like I don't want to have a bush and she was like why don't you have your vagina lasered you've lasered everything else ever and I would like to say I've never once had a Brazilian wax I've never had my vagina lasered and I think everyone thinks that that's so not page coded well why did you stop there like at that point just like they're already doing it like what no she said the same thing she was like but you've gotten your bikini line lasered and I'm like yeah and I've had it waxed before and she was like so why did you stop there and I said I don't know she was like you go to the gynecologist you spread wide open like what is the difference between getting it lasered and i it's something in me that you're like shy i'm like i'm sorry i can't get on all fours and have this woman look inside my vagina in my asshole inside your soul yeah like there's just something about it where i'm like i don't want so you don't have your butthole laser no i no that's literally all i laser i only laser my butthole they come in and i'm like i truly i'm not kidding i shave my vagina not every day because that would be insane but like every time i know i'm having sex like i shave my vagina people do use like um a trimmer which i'm bald we didn't do back in the day oh okay okay okay sorry i didn't mean to get so aggressive i love how if people we start really light and then if you make it to the end of the episode you're like yeah i don't have hair in my labia she she was shook she like literally you know people don't talk about i have hair inside my labia majora not menorah google it no so like when they laser they have to like open a flap open it up yeah they open it up and they ring the doorbell

48:38and like at some point i'm like no one's even gonna see this like you my husband's never even seen this area that you're in in my vagina right now but like it's sensitive it's sensitive no i'm just like i guess do you want to know probably what it was is like the aren't bushes bad i don't know but like the first time i ever like shaved my vagina like i didn't want to tell my mom like i shaved my vagina i don't know why yeah because it means you're like becoming a woman and it's yeah so just like ever since then i've just like kept it to myself oh my god you never talked to anyone about it you're like let's wait to talk to all the gigglers that'll be more comfortable for me but now i'm like i mean i guess i should just like go get it lasered but it's such a commitment but you don't have to worry about the sun if it's just your vagina which is the upside we yeah we are in an industry full of a lot of like gays and girls and we do a lot of like trying on clothes like and like hip hop like i know they're not gonna like run around and be like i know what page's vagina looks like but it's yeah it's just such an intimate moment no you're so right but do you feel like with other stuff not your vagina but like because we do so much fashion stuff we are so easy to take our shirts off with strangers hannah which is not normal by the way I actually like I think I offended someone the other day.

50:02I was on. No, I'm not kidding. I was on set. I'm getting reported. Actually, like if there was HR. You're on a list. No, I'm on some type of list. I was on a set and they were like, hey, we're going to have to mic you up. And I had a dress on that had a slit. And so I hiked the slit up because they were like, we have to put a thigh strap on. So I hiked the slit up and the guy was like, oh. and i go i'm from reality tv i don't give a shit like it's the thing we are we are desensitized it shouldn't be like that but like like we used to change our clothes and with like cameras around you don't know who's watching but you're just at the point where you're like whatever i don't give a fuck like i'm so tired i'm not gonna go into the other room to take my shirt off like whatever you were on a sports team of all women i went to an all girls high school like if you're getting like we were getting undressed like yeah I recently was in a place though where like I was wearing a bra and they wanted to steam my shirt because I don't show up anywhere professionally and there was like five women there but I like obviously I just met them when I walked in and they were like we can all leave and I'm like no one's leaving I'm wearing a sports bra like no but then I realized maybe they feel uncomfortable the other day I got a massage and she came to my apartment and she's talking to me and she's like okay and then we'll do this and this and i just started taking my pants off and she goes okay i'll step in the bathroom and give you a minute i go it's fine let's just get in there i'm like these are my tits and here we go but then part of it is like have we just become confident where it's like this is our body we're not like sexualizing it all the time i guess i feel like i'm an artist when it's a girl and i'm in that type of situation i'm like okay whatever like you have a vagina i have a vagina when it's at a work thing i feel like this is gonna get faster i'm not embarrassed if you see my underwear you know i have underwear like you know i have a vagina we have a weird fucking job yeah like most people's jobs aren't like can you just walk around in your underwear for 10 minutes while we figure out what you're gonna wear and can you talk to people that you've just met five seconds ago like our comfortability factor of you walk in a room there's people working on a project you've never met and you're just like tits out it's wild but i'm proud of us yeah no i'm proud of us too we don't have like body dysmorphia so that's good people are like how do you talk for an hour about nothing and i'm like it's easy compared to just showing your tits to strangers all the time i probably my mom's gonna call me after this and be like hey um what what do you do for a living actually my mom's gonna call me and be like hair should be on your vagina because it stops bacteria from getting in there.

52:50Maybe that's why you're getting so many UTIs because you don't have any hair on your vagina. She said it to me before. Okay. It's like eyelashes. It's like eyelashes and nose hair, she said. She was like, there's supposed to be hair. I'm like, okay, well, I'm from the 90s, so I can't. You know? Anywho. Well, Gigglers, we love you so, so much. And thank you for giggling with us. and thank god for my duncan refresher because i don't think i would have gotten to the vagina story without it wait are you drinking a mango pineapple i am and we never get the same thing i know look at us twinsies it's so good and we did that like without even knowing simpatico