Giggling about girl's gays, male comics, and method acting

0:29What's up, gigglers? What's up, my green gigglers? Sorry. No, Hannah chose right now to have breakfast. That was a dry swallow. I have so much to talk about today. First of all, it's Sunday. Yeah. Wake up, glorious, snowing. Text Grace at 9 a.m. She doesn't answer. I'm like, okay, she's probably brushing her teeth. She's just peeing or shower. hour maybe she's always ready to before me right and we have to be somewhere by 11 yeah so there's two hours but like it's nine yeah so then I call her she doesn't answer then I'm like okay I'm gonna call her again because she might be sleeping she might have overslept yeah then I went full mom mode and I was like she's lying down in the street unconscious someone needs to find Grace she went out last night she never came well do you have Grace's location I'm like not a location person I don't even have my husband's location.

1:30What? No, you need to start taking down people's locations. Paige, we don't have each other's locations. I don't have your location? Wait a second. Wait a second. I feel like... I'm probably the only person that you would want to know. I don't have your location. I always want to know your location. Sierra just randomly took my location one day. I have Sierra's location. She likes just having it. Yeah. I check in to see where she is every once in a while. Sometimes she really throws me for a loop. One time I checked, she was in like Vancouver. Oh yeah, she's always like in London. No, I think having people's location is very important.

2:09Clearly not that much because you never asked me for it. Well, you have a husband. You have other people that are watching you. Like if you go missing, I'm probably not the first person that's going to notice. It's going to be someone else and that person should have your location. That's like when Des and I got in a fight because I put my mom down as my emergency contact. Wait, I didn't know that. You didn't know that? No, for what? I don't know. Some DMV stuff. And he looks at me and he was like, did you just put your mom? And I was like, yeah, she's the only adult I know. And he was like, I'm your husband.

2:40I'm your emergency contact. I'm like, you're always with me. You're not my emergency contact. Wait, he's also like always out of town. Yeah, you're always out of town, like speaking Mandarin to someone on the phone. You're a spy. I'm not putting your contact down. Normalize not having your spouse be your emergency contact. When does your mom not become your emergency contact? I think when you get married. Wait, no, no, no. My husband is not taking care of me. That's disgusting and not feminist. Also, I do have to say, people are like, oh, it's a... Wait, this is, I think, going to start, like, a real conversation.

3:14Yeah. Like, I don't think... My dad's not my emergency contact ever. Why would I put my husband? Are you deses? but your does is obviously. I told him, how long have you been doing that? You're like, do you want to put my mom down? No, I said that. I said, I have my mom's number if you need. She's available for all of us at all times. That's her only job on this world is to make sure in emergencies she's there for me. I'm like, should I put Lenore down? Also, side note, who's ever needed an emergency contact? Because I got hit by a car once and I'm pretty sure they didn't have an emergency contact.

3:47Do you know in my phone, like if something were to ever happen to me And like the police are like, oh, where's her phone? If you go in my phone, my mom is my emergency contact in my phone. You can make that like a thing. You're such a nervous Nellie. I love it. You're like, well, I'm very prepared for this moment. I'm like, if there's an apocalypse, someone's going to call my mom. Can I say one thing about marriage too? Everyone's like, oh, it's embarrassing to have a boyfriend. It's more embarrassing to be married. And then I was thinking about gay people and how jealous I am. Like when gay people get married, it's a movement.

4:19Yes. When I get married, I'm embarrassing. Well, again, only for girls. Only for girls. Yeah, when men get married, everyone goes, thank God. Yeah, like when men get married, they're like, oh, he finally settled down. Like he like worked on himself. He waited. He's going to be on track. He's like, yep. She's going to hold him down. Yes. He was all crazy. Yeah, she's his rock. He's holding him down. But like when we do it, it's like your life expectancy is going to go down and just the Your friends stop acting for your location. They're literally like, bye. Bye, bitch. He goes, you're married. I'm like, okay, I never see my husband.

4:57Wait, speaking of... We have so much to talk about today. We have so much to talk about. Did you see that TikTok video of the girl getting mugged in like, I think she was on vacation, like in like Columbia or somewhere? That's so your algorithm, girls getting mugged. No, I have nice sweet cat videos. She's got her backpack on. She's with her male friend, which we can only assume is her boyfriend, husband, or fiance. Or I could be platonic. We don't fully know yet. See, I immediately went to gay, but continue. What we do know is she's got her backpack on. He's got his backpack on. They're looking at something.

5:34Like, looks like they're looking at directions on the phone. Someone comes from around the corner, tries to snatch her phone. She starts fighting the guy. Like, no, you're not taking my phone. The man she's with runs away. runs away behind a wall okay this woman's fighting for her life a random guy from the street sees it's happening runs up I think he might have even been like on a motorcycle or something and like pulls up runs to her helps her gets the guy away from her and then her boyfriend comes like walking back into frame like are you okay talk about never being able to get wet again around him no i would actually murder him also side note if i did have a gay best friend with me i feel like gay guys are the first to be like let me beat his ass there's also nothing i love more than being with my gay guy friends and they start acting like your boyfriend like at the airport they're like i'll grab your i'm like no when you remember like wait they're really strong like sometimes mitchell will do something and i'll be like oh my god i forget that like you're a man.

6:44You're a man. And people see you in the street. They don't know you. And you're a man. So they're all automatically respecting you. It's funny because that's the only thing we need men for is to defend us in that very specific situation that may or may not happen. And it's funny because I'm with an older man. And to take our bags down from the overhead space. Which they never do. By the way, actually yesterday on the flight, I'm sitting next to this man, which I was like, oh no. This could go badly. Didn't speak to me the whole time. I was like, I love this man. yep and then I'm waiting at the end he stands up in the aisle so obviously I can't go into the aisle to get my stuff and he looks at me and he's like do you have a bag up here when I tell you I fly eight times a week first time this has happened this year really and you said yes and I said actually yes little did you know I had like seven bags I was like yes and he pulled on the luggage and he goes what about this backpack I go that is mine too he goes what about that coat I go that is mine too we're laughing we're kee-keeing and I said we just brought men and women together how old was they he was a you know what he was like a nice 40 year old yeah yeah like he was he married I don't think so but he also I don't know he just was like old school did he give dad vibes yeah yeah yeah you have to get a dad because no one you have to get a dad you have to get a dad because no one under the age of 25 like man is even like looking in your direction to take like Like they don't even, that's not even running through their head of like, oh, maybe I should help them get a bag down.

8:12That's like not. It's crazy. It's really guys that are 30 to 40 that you're like, hello. Where like past 45, they're helping more. Yeah. But. But also past 50, they like can't. Right. Like at some point I'm like, I got it, sir. You're going to pull a ligament. I got it. We don't need the plane to turn around because you have to go to the doctor. Also, chaos ensued on one of my flights. a woman looks up and she goes why does this always happen to you? someone took my bag this is my worst nightmare that's actually my worst fear I was in row 2 so thank god like it could only be like two people in front of us it was just a mistake but the person was kind of like okay well you just have to go find them so then I'm like locked in to the drama wait the flight attendant was like okay we'll go chase them she literally goes we'll go get them bitch and I was like behind her like let's go girl so I'm just following her Oh, my God.

9:08And she's chasing this guy. And this guy is like, no idea. It's just a black bag. And then one thing I realized, and I didn't hear it specifically, but I want to say one other thing about men. Sorry, Chris. They never fucking say sorry. I say sorry if you hit me. Yeah. If you pummel me in the airport, I go, I am so sorry. That's such a good point. You punch a woman in the face and she's like, I am sorry for what I did. um men like I'll have uber drivers or no like a driver supposed to pick me up for the airport and be like oversleep 40 minutes late doesn't say sorry when he gets there yeah like and this is not just one person this happens all the time with men they don't say sorry and they don't use exclamation points when they're writing emails and you know what part of me respects it I say should I be more like that but then I think how am I gonna not say sorry for being an hour late to a pickup time to an airport.

10:03I've been really PMSing. They make it like, I made a mistake. Yeah. Good for you. Good for you. Let it out. That I was writing such a stern email this week that I started crying.

10:25I literally am typing and I go, wait, this is like actually kind of me. You're Sarah Jessica Parker, but for mean emails. Then at the bottom of the email, I go, I hope this didn't come off as harsh. And I'm full on sobbing. Can I tell people what you do? When? Which is actually very healthy. When? When? Okay, so when Paige is really, really mad, but she knows that she needs to not say anything. Yeah. She will write it out. like full flesh like like novels to people send it to me I said that was a good one and she goes thank you and then deletes it I write informational text messages to people I hate I write full like and I edit it it's a form of journaling I edit it sometimes I'll take certain paragraphs and I'll throw it in chat GPT and I'll be like make that snarkier and I'm like and I'm like oh yeah that's a good one and so I'll type out a full fucking text message to someone and I won't obviously send it to that person because like I could start a I could start a war that like companies would end like things would happen it would be crazy yeah so I just send it to Hannah and I'll appreciate the line and like you get it's so good I mean I'll do that with social media like you will not see me like I will never I'm not you're not in the comments at all but if I do see anything that pisses me off you just write it out you have a little smirk because you're like that would have been funny Paige would have laughed at that and then you delete it and you go on with your life I hate people in two different senses like I can hate you and I will never acknowledge that you're even alive on this planet and that's like that's worse for you and that means I don't hate you as much as other people but I really just more like want to piss you off but then there's another kind of hate where I'm like I literally am manifesting for you the worst possible next five years when are you getting your period hopefully no I actually think I have PMDG where I'd like my PMS because this week I've been I was visceral I was PMSing I actually just got my period that's why I'm so relaxed today and gorgeous um my luteal phase is over I was bloated like a pig um I was swollen and I'm mad like the week before your period you were so ugly so I mean you're gorgeous at all times but like me I was on vacation and I was like that's crazy Des at one point was like are you pregnant and I was like that you're not supposed to ask people that like literally you're not supposed to ask people that and then I got a HIPAA violation You're not even my emergency contact.

13:16You're not my emergency contact. I'm just like, anything. You didn't ask me that. I got a headache. You know when it's like in your eye socket? Like it's, I'm like Googling like what part of my eye socket and then I'm like. Like you had a migraine. I had a migraine this week too. But you know what's so funny? I'm insane. So I've never called it a migraine. I'm just like, I have a really bad headache. Well, I classify a migraine when like after I take Advil or Tylenol and it's still there. And like if I have to turn the light off, I'm like, oh, this is a migraine. I have to say one thing about my Oura Ring.

13:46Okay. Because if you haven't noticed, I'm back on my Oura Ring bullshit. I don't think we ever really addressed it when you started it because I try to just like ignore it. I love Oura Ring. You do? Well, it's fun because if I worked out, it would be more fun. But I don't. It's more like me on tour being like, how tired am I? It's like a fun game. You wake up and it goes, you're really fucking tired. It's basically looking at your own social media. Yes. But this is the problem that I do have to raise awareness about Oura Rings. so now it'll say this thing being like you're really tired make sure you um relax today so i've been using it like i haven't worked out in a month and does like you should like move your body a little and i go uh my aura ring so i wake up i don't even consider working out because i'm like my aura ring's just a rest that's how i am with the app the pattern which is basically like horoscope it's like everyone sucks today but you and i'm like i knew it and period i have an idea for aura if they made a version for animals i would get it like if i could put an aura ring on kitty and see like a collar yeah like what's her sleeping patterns like when was she awake last night is she hungry that's my furbo like my furbo lets me know like i watch what butter's up to at night yeah we don't know about a lot but what we do know about is getting enough sleep and being rested and when we don't get enough sleep we're nightmarish nightmarish sinister energy i have a very lengthy morning routine nighttime routine you love a routine i love a routine i like adding things into my routine taking things out of my routine one thing that is a staple in my routine is my ag1 i've been using ag1 for years now honestly i would say like 2019 is probably when I first started using it.

15:35Oh my God. And I'm so happy that AG1 now has something for our nighttime routine. And we're so excited about AGZ. It's a new melatonin-free nightly drink that becomes a simple ritual we now look forward to at night. Added into my nighttime routine all the time. I like to be working while I'm sleeping. That's one thing. People think we're like lazy. We're bed rotters. No, we're working. Working just horizontally. I'm recharging. I'm hair oiling. I'm getting my fill of magnesium. Multitasking, yes. I also, I love a fun drink. You do. I don't want to drink water. No, you don't. I don't. And at night, when you're not going out, I still want to have something fun, a little party in my bedroom.

16:17Now they have a flavor mixed berry that has right to the top of my list. It makes my routine even easier because it does taste so good. So I have it at nighttime because it has magnesium in it, and magnesium is very important for women specifically. And I'm obsessed with the chocolate mint right now because I make it hot. I make it hot. It feels nice on the throat. I make it with warm oat milk since I'm off my dairy, as you know. And I sip it while cuddling my cat. And it just tells my body, like, the day's over. We're slowing down. Stop overthinking everything. Stop thinking about everything that you've done that's embarrassing in your life.

16:55And let's relax. I wake up feeling rested, not groggy. Sleep is actually like our number one superpower. So it's melatonin free. I'm off melatonin. I'm all about magnesium. And magnesium is supposed to be like better for women. It helps you sleep. Yes. And I just, I prefer it. I love a nighttime warm drink. You do. And I love a nighttime cold drink. And that's where we're different, but similar. But there's nothing like getting in bed. You've fulfilled all your tasks. Your hair's up in a bun. You're doing a mask. You have a face mask on. You've already journaled. You've picked your show for later and you're drinking a nice drink.

17:30We're officially obsessed with our new nighttime routine. AGZ is the melatonin-free nightly drink that helps your body and mind wind down and supports restful, restorative sleep so you can wake up feeling refreshed. We love that you can work it into your nightly routine and turn better sleep into your new favorite ritual. If you're ready to turn down the stress and focus on the rest, head to drinkag1.com slash giggly to get a free frother with your first purchase of AGZ. that's drink ag1.com slash giggly this segment was brought to you by ag1 speaking of last night and speaking of gays because if you guys don't know i was i was a gay in a past life i am on a gay algorithm i seek the gays approval like nobody's business um i think there is something healing about like going from wanting straight approval to gay male approval that's like wait i have so much to say about this i'm really happy you're bringing this up.

18:24No, you can go on with this. I learned recently that there's... Oh, she's moving stuff around. I need an area. There's gays, gays, girls, gays. Oh, because the gays, gays hate women. The gays, gays hate women. They're rooting against us. Now, I rarely, rarely come into contact with gays, gays, to the point where I don't know it's happening to me. You were with me one specific time. I attract gays, gays. they come towards you attract gays gays we're like all of my gay guy friends they're girls gays like they're excited like and here i saw this video on tiktok and it was like if you're a girl's gay you of any other species on the planet watch women get their heart broken so many times not just from like relationships just like them living like the abortion stuff like all of that stuff like Like if your friends – They're in tune.

19:20Yeah, because they're in our lives with us. Where gays, gays are like only with gay guys and they like don't really give a shit about women. And I didn't know this was a thing until one time I was with a gay man and I was with Hannah. And I was like, oh, I think he's maybe being mean to me. But sometimes I'm sensitive. So I'm like, no, like I'm just being sensitive. Like whatever. And then he said like a couple other things and Hannah was like – Then I saw Hannah get confused. I'm like, no, this is Paige. No, no. You can talk like that to me. You can talk like that to Paige. You're gay and this is Paige.

19:56Where's the disconnect? And I'll never forget this gay man as long as I live because I was shocked. You wrote him a pretend email. A pretend email. Also, some Giggly Squad shows, there are different girls gays too where I think there's like a Paige gay and a Hannah gay. Yeah. Because I don't want to, gay men do connect with me in a different way. Some gays love sports and those girls' gays are your gays. Well, there will be some very funny, specific Bravo gays. Some of them do like me. Some of them are literally like, the Bravo gays have kept me sane for a long time. Wait. What Bravo gays? Every man on reality TV.

20:46I was just going to say, they're not out. I know. I was saying like the Instagram. Those actually classifies gays gays. Like Bravo by gays. Like we love them. Oh, like them. But occasionally on a Bigly Squad show, there will be like a gay guy raise his hand. And he'll be like, hi, Paige. Look at me. And then ask you something about your outfit. And I'm like, oh, we're in a fucking fight. but then I'll have like a gay come up to me at like um a coffee shop and be like by the way like Netflix doesn't have a lot of specials I feel like I could connect with and watching your special like I love doing I was like can you tell Paige because she thinks that like gay guys don't like her it's like kind of bad for my brand um so there is a we're learning that there is a range there's a range and I was like unaware of it and then I was like oh no I've actually experienced But look, misogyny comes in all shapes and forms.

21:35All shapes and sizes. Now, which brings me to last night, I watched the first three episodes of Heated Rivalry. Now, has Heated Rivalry come across your desk at all? It sure has. How so? I'm an avid show surfer. You are. And if there's something new on the platforms, I'm dialed in. I know what's coming out. I have things on Netflix like Saved, Alert Me, Emily in Paris, Thursday, like we know it. So when I was on Amazon and I saw, because there was another Amazon show, I forget what it's called, but they were royal and they were gays. And I loved that. You love that. And so then I saw Hockey Players and I was like, hmm.

22:18So I'm two episodes in. Oh, I didn't know. Of course. Did you start watching after I told you last night? No, I've been watching. Okay, sorry. I've been watching. I tried to take credit. Before you tell your story, one little fact I want the Gigglers to know. There is not one out NHL player. There might be one in the minor leagues. I think maybe there's one in like the level below. I love that you immediately looked into this. Well, statistically, honey. Statistically, cannot be true. Cannot be true. Now, let me preface this because I know we recommend a lot of stuff on Giggly Squad. And I know that y 'all are listening and you're like, oh, let's throw it on.

22:56and, you know, the holidays are coming up and you're going to be with your family. He's like, oh, Hannah Page mentioned this show, Heated Rivalry. Warning. Or maybe you should. Or open a conversation. Open a conversation with Graham Graham. If someone brings up politics or anything homophobic, say, hey, I want to show you a new show. I've got a show for you. A holiday show. It's called Heated Rivalry. Now, this is my hot take about Heated Rivalry. It is everything I wanted Challengers to be and Challengers wasn't. And as you guys know, I have. Wait, were they gay in Challengers? They were like teasing it the whole time.

23:31They were gay baiting. And in my head, I was like, if this was about like this love triangle, but the guys are actually hooking up and they're like in the closet on tour together, like I'm locked in. Locked. So he'd arrived. And by the way, when I first went to Wisconsin, Goldby Edgers, I was unfamiliar with hockey. I'd only known like basketball players, baseball players. I was from Brooklyn. I never met this breed of hockey man. They're pale. They're chiseled. They have bow legs. They have STDs. They have little fucked up teeth. Yeah. They talk like this. They're all, but they're all like kind of beautiful.

24:07Yeah. Well, they're like, they're very like grunt. There's like boys, dirty boys, boys. And they went to like college together. And their hair is always like straggly and they grow out there. And they have all these names for each other. And they have to like squat on the ice. Honestly, I was into it. Yeah. Because it is figure skating, but then they punch each other to remind themselves it's straight. Yeah, it's like, okay, that was a triple style count.

24:32It's not for done. It wasn't anything else, but a Tara Lipinski flip. I'm like, let's be serious. No, they literally do a triple style count, and then they're like, oh, I'm straight. So this is - Also, just a wild concept that there's a sporting event where they're like, yeah, if they want to punch each other, we're okay with it as long as it doesn't go too far. It makes no sense. That's assault. At any point, a guy will just, it is actually like a form of theater. Because if anyone did that in any other sport. No, it's a form of theater. It's like, oh, he's gotten angry. Like if a girl did that, imagine if middle of a podcast I started punching you.

25:10That would be a problem. But no, it's good entertainment. That's what I mean about like gang violence. It's like, guys, just go to therapy. Talk it out. But also you know these guys get a beer afterwards, which is the even crazier thing. Or they might be having sex. A lot of lovers quarrels could be happening on the ice that we don't even know. That's why they've been fighting. The whole time they've been fighting because they're like, did you look at that guy's ass? We're figuring everything out. Now, as someone, when I tell you guys, I was not a jersey chaser because I was an athlete. So it was more athlete on athlete crime.

25:44But in theory, I just loved athletes my whole life. all I want to do is athletes. I've never looked at a poet. I've, I've dabbled in a musician, but he did play sports and that was a mistake. Yeah. Um, and we learned and we grew, we learned and we grew, but I'm obsessed with athletes. Cause as you guys know, I'm very strong and athletes make me feel tiny and like just adorable and little around them. And they're like, you're so tiny. I'm like, I know. So then watching this made me question everything. Cause in my head, But I'm like, well, I'm just like the athletes on campus are the most manly, masculine, straight dudes.

26:20And look, have I heard through the grapevine in real life that this may or may not have happened? A couple times, yes. But now I'm looking at everyone differently. I'm looking around at every dude and I don't, Chris, I don't trust you. Like if I was a dude, I'd be fucking my friends. Like girls is so much more like you got to, you know, make them trust you. It seems very complicated. If you are just a horny dude, fuck your friend. Leave us alone. Leave us alone. Go jerk off with your friend. Now, I'm afraid I didn't even preface this correctly. Heated rivalries about gay hockey players. And when I tell you, how is it 2025?

27:00Sorry, I'm very passionate about this. and we haven't yet had a like mainstream TV show of like a male gay love story that is so I'm locked in yeah I'm locked in also by the way there is it is I don't want to be like oh it's gay porn but like if you're watching a show where straight people hook up it's a lot of sex so just like warning people also but there's no dicks one point for like the male loneliness epidemic like obviously like they're trying to blame it like all on the girls and like we're mean to them now and stuff but like maybe it's because the men can't create a space in which they're safe with each other like there was this video on tiktok and it was like this girl went up to like a certain amount of women and it was like if you could move to a world where it was just all women are you going and every woman was like fuck yeah like i'm going and then they asked the same question to men like would you move to a world that was all men and every man was like absolutely not that's insane i why would we ever do that but then all the men do is complain that they didn't can't hang out with their friends enough but it's the gay ones well mind you like an all-female world i don't think would work either because like the amount of text messages i probably have to send is insane sms would explode but in like just a low level thinking of it we enjoy being with each other for long periods of time because we feel safe with each other they don't even feel safe enough to be like hey i think that guy's hot well could you imagine what's great in that show is you they can't communicate with each other and he just keeps saying fuck you bro fuck you like that's how they talk and then i'm like that's literally how the guys always talk to each other one day was like wait i actually think i'm attracted to women and i think i'm a lesbian You're the first person I'm telling.

28:48Well, because you'd marry me. Well, because if you were like, I guess you'd be like, whoa, whoa, whoa. So now I'm two people's emergency contact? Like, what? I'm like, no, you're none. When are you going to figure it out? No, well, we, when men hang out, they have trouble expressing. I hope that men, Chris, do you have one guy that you can call? How long have you been friends with your best friend? My oldest best friend is probably like sixth grade. Okay. But I'm probably more closer with people in recent years. Okay. When's the last time you had like a sentimental like deep where you were like, man, that was a really deep conversation with so-and-so?

29:28Somewhat often. Really? Yeah, somewhat often. Chris is like, like Chris is our kid. Yeah, he's giant. Yeah. How old are you again? 28. 28. So you are technically Gen Z or no, you're on the cusp. It's like right on the cusp. You're like an older Gen Z. The last time you complimented your guy friend, like, honestly. Oh, that's tough. Like, seriously and non-ironically? Yeah. Like, years. But actually, Paige and I don't compliment each other. That's not true. I'm just kidding. But, like, the way I compliment you is, like, I'll make fun of you and they'll be like. Yeah, but that's, well, that's terrible.

29:57But, like, when you walk in somewhere and, like, you look good at him and you look so good. Well, yeah, because then you're obsessed with me. Yeah. And then when you don't say anything, I, like, have to go home and reflect on my decisions. It's a whole thing. But I digress. Did you have another point? This heated rivalry is so good. Also, I love that in film and TV, traditionally. In the arts. In the arts. I feel like gay characters were so stereotyped. When there's a gay guy, it's just the gay best friend. That's the only gay guy there is. Totally. And he doesn't have his own storyline. And he's, you know, bitchy and girly.

30:32And that's it. So just them showing these guys. and they're not acting in like a theatrical stereotypical gay way which by the way being a girly gay is perfect it's just there isn't one kind of gay which we've discussed earlier in this podcast like they're not out so they are almost like cosplaying yeah and so it's actually like there's also an element to it where it's like sad where you're like wait I wish you could just like be together and like tell everyone like and it's funny because at first because I'm not used to seeing it because I don't watch male gay porn. You don't? So I heard from the lesbian community yeah lesbians love male gay porn and lesbian correspondents message me if I'm wrong because I don't want to have false information out there but some lesbians it's like why I've actually I've never watched it's why straight girls like girl-on-girl porn because they're so like removed from it like it's almost like we still haven't been able to figure this one out but lesbians don't want to watch two girls pretend to hook up where straight girls were like okay cute what do you mean they're pretending I know she squirted she really liked that actually but having at first one wait that is actually really funny I've never even thought to look for two gay men No, no.

31:57Because I'm like, what am I going to do here? No, I've never clicked. Also, it seems like. I never even see it. Aggressive. I don't also, yeah, like I don't, two dicks, that's a nightmare. Yeah. So then, but, so watching it when they first start kissing, I think I got like a visceral reaction because I'm so not used to seeing it. And at first I was like, ah. And then by the second episode, I was like, put your finger in his butt. Let's do this. I'm locked in. And it was like very hot. Well, it also kind of shows a, like, part of it that we kind of forget that. Anal's like a thing. No, I'm just kidding.

32:35There's more holes. In 2025, there's so many men that are not out. And not just because I've dated half of them, but because, like, I look in the world and it's very sad. Well, think about it. All girls are gay. Totally. All girls are gay. We have to come out as straight. Yeah. We say, oh, I'm straight. I'm sorry. I'm straight. Yeah. Well, we are We're comfortable enough with our sexuality To be able to say, like, that girl is so hot Or, like, watch gay, lesbian porn Like, I've never heard a straight man say, like, I watch guy on guy porn Because we're out here just being like, yeah, obviously I watch two girls Watching a man is like, oh We don't know But bottom line is, in 2025, where gay marriage is legal And there's, like, we hope it stays We hope continuing That there's still men that feel like they can't come out I also think there's a lot of men that are just like on the spectrum.

33:27Yeah. Where they're like, maybe I'm bi. Yeah, like where sexuality is all over the place. And with girls, it's more freeing and socially acceptable. Also, do you know how many girls you see on the street holding hands that you're just like, oh, they're so cute best friends. But they're dating. Speaking of just, oh.

33:44I watched the Taylor Swift documentary. I watched the first two episodes too. Wait, we never watch the same things. This week is like a miracle, you guys. happy holidays even just saying you're impressed by her it is like such a low level I and look I like Taylor Swift I when I was in high school like when that album first album came out like the girls we just got our license it was life-changing obviously like as time has gone on I feel like I've missed a couple albums I wasn't like as in tuned but like now she's like Getting engaged and all this stuff and this documentary. She's so impressive.

34:24It's actually mind-blowing. Well, when you follow a celebrity just through, like, other people's concepts of them and tweets and random photos and narratives, so much is made up. Yes. And obviously this documentary, like, is made by her and she's putting forward something, but you can't deny what she's showing. Right. Which is, first of all, she's a genius. Genius. Can we just say it? Yeah. She's a genius. like if she was a man everyone would be like talking about her like literally like like a philosopher like she's a genius when she speaks everything she says is so astute and smart and three and a half hours on stage Paige and I Paige and I it's all it's all I thought about three and a half hours I was like I did you see the one part where she was like I'm sorry I'm just like her mom comes in and she was like I'm just like a little like she wants to say anxious yeah she's happy Like, all I could think of was, like, do you take beta blockers?

35:21Like, I wanted to know. I mean, seeing her get home from the show, take off her makeup, and be like, oh, I'm just going to watch TV for eight hours. Yeah, it's like I can't come down. We were, like, we were Taylor Swift. I felt like Taylor Swift. But think about how much more she's doing. I'd die. I'd actually die on tour. I love that she was like, I don't remember choreography. Yes. So, and I go, I love, but it's, she's normalizing. She's like, don't count to me. That's disgusting. You don't have to be perfect. She's like, I know what my strengths are. I'm really fucking good at what I do. And then I hire people to do the right things around me.

35:54And then like the fact that she trusts the people around her so much that she's like, I need to step it up for them. She's like, I have the best people in the business. And then. Also, I thought it was crazy when she was like, look, if the tour makes more money than projected, then that means everyone gets bonuses, which like when you hear that said, you're like, oh, yeah, that makes sense. Like it grossed more money, whatever. but to then find out that like that happens all the time where the tour will make more money than projected and not the majority of artists are not tipping their crew like extra I think speaks volumes well there look there's two types of people in the world probably more but one kind is like I earned this this is me hoard all the money and I and all these people are so lucky to fucking be here yeah and then there's people who are like oh my god I wouldn't be here without all all these people who left their families.

36:47Also, the happier they are, it starts from the bottom. Like if the person driving you is content and everything comes up from that, everyone is happier. And I do think what's cool about Taylor is you see she knows she can make an impact. And what they say in Spider-Man, with great power comes great responsibility. Like she knows that she can change someone's life and she does. so the documentary is fascinating and I'm upset I never was able to go to the show I went to the one at MetLife and it was incredible I mean like she is a performer like and I've been to a lot of concerts before and you're like oh my god she's such a cute little dancer and she's so good but Taylor is giving a full Broadway there's no other way to describe it it's a full Broadway theatrical performance she's telling a story she's talking to you She's bringing on guests.

37:43I mean, three hours. I couldn't even tell you another concert I've been to that was over two hours. I can't do anything for three hours. No. And how she did it every single night. And focusing. To go where she went, like 220 places or something. Yeah. I do love her relationship with her mom. I love her relationship with her mom. I also think that she's so mentally strong. Like, to be able to meet with those families where they had children that were killed. and then for her to be able and she's crying hysterically and then to be able to be like no compartmentalize it now I have to go on stage I'm like I can't also a lot of people would be like I'm not meeting with the families before the show it's gonna fuck me up can we find a different time all I was thinking was before the show she probably doesn't have time and also I think that she also was like I need to do this I need to see and then did you see when she gets off stage she walks off stage straight into the car like there's no she's not changing she's not stopping she's just going and as someone who sees a lot of people tour some people like tour as a party i don't get that and they have like 20 people with them at all times yeah and they're it's it's just a different kind of there's a lot of she's an athlete she's treated like a sport which is what we try to do there's a lot of jobs that i would say that like men take and just make alcohol event but then they try and say they're working you're like nope that's just you and your friends are getting drunk so men invented meetings men invented me yeah have you ever watched mad men yeah all they do is have scotch and then like talk about the secretary for 20 minutes and then be like okay and it's like why is there a male loneliness epidemic it's like guys one thing i have learned to motivate the gigglers is like now that i'm in my 30s you know you deal with you're not like entry-level job anymore yeah so you talk to people that are like high up at companies so scary guys no one knows what they're doing no one no one knows what they're doing like i hope this makes you feel better oh my recent flex though unless you work and let's be very clear unless you're like a lawyer or a doctor yeah you that type of profession you unless you're honestly a woman in the field but like there's just a lot of people that have just like been at the job for a while they're there like they're not like they're not doing something crazy that you can't do yeah have some belief in yourself you were mentioning emails with men putting exclamation mark in emails now by the way I'm not part of a company so don't do what I do because I like I'm an entrepreneur yep my recent flex in emails is like no grammar have you noticed so it looks like I'm because I actually am busy yeah so like I respond like I'm so busy but I'm just barely getting the response out like like no period you're literally on every email i want so i'll just be like you know what when i see hannah respond i go oh she's responsible so this is what i'll say this works thank you and i'll be like all under case no period i don't even put a space until my signature just this works thank you hannah burner yeah because it's just like Like, we're, I'm not like, hello, thank you for regarding my last email.

41:00No, we don't have time. And I try and do that. Time is money. But then after I send that text message or that email with no punctuation or I'm just like blunt ask the question, I'm like, everyone thinks I'm a bitch. No, I don't think that. I think it's funnier, though, if you like have bad grammar and you're trying to be like, sincerely. When you're trying to be like more professional. Formal and it doesn't make sense. I left that when I left a desk. And do you know why? Because if your email has multiple paragraphs, I'm not reading it. Also, sue me. I'm throwing in an LOL every once in a while.

41:29You love an LOL. I love an LOL. And you love what Hannah says, LOL. Because they're like, Paige, what do you think? Whatever Hannah said, LOL. Well, look, millennials are running stuff now, so we can say LOL. Absolutely. It's mandatory. Can I say one more thing about gay men? Yes, it's my favorite topic. Jonathan Bailey, who's the most handsome person in the world. is the first gay sexiest man alive. And I think we're just acknowledging that, first of all, all men are probably gay. Yeah. So we might as well pick an out gay man now. Yes. I'm pretty sure we said last sexiest man alive that it should have been Jonathan Bailey.

42:07Jonathan Bailey. He's so attractive. He's so cute. Do you see when he really thinks something's funny and he, like, falls over? I'm like, that's adorable. Are you, like, attracted to him? Yeah. Like, would you hook? Yeah, okay. I'm also attracted to pretty much everyone in heated rivalry. Oh, yeah. Who do you like more? Specifically the – Don't say the Russian. No. Okay. You know I don't like a blonde. You hate a blonde. Oh, you like the hairy one. Yeah. I love him. Because he looks a little Italian. Yeah. He's – I love him. Is he gay in real life, you think? He is. Which is crazy because he – That's good for them, but that's how bad.

42:42He's Canadian. I looked him up. By the way, the Russian guy in heated rivalry was every single one of my Russian coaches growing up. Is he gay in real life? I don't know. They haven't said. It's like kind of part of the allure. Oh, interesting. So I just grew up with like handsome, young Russian and Ukrainian tennis coaches in Brooklyn who like looking back now, I'm like they were definitely hung over. They were partying, having a good time. But they would just yell at me. And I was nine years old and I'd be like, can I have water, Sergey? And they'd be like, no, bend your knees. But they were all so hot.

43:13So I got some PTSD, PTSD, DSTP watching it. But my final thing about hot gay men, the reason I like them so much is because they are my type and that they don't like me. They are so disgusted by me and I'm like, oh, I love that. Yeah. I stand around them. They're like, can you please just walk away? Yeah. I don't know what's attracted me to all my gay boyfriends. I think just like hair and jawline. I think they're attracted to you because they want to be you. And then you like attention. That's what it is. I thought it. I attract them. Yeah, and then you like people who like you. So next thing you know, you're just in it.

43:54I had a fun time in Mexico. Thank you for asking. Oh, sorry. No, I'm just kidding. It was literally three days. Yeah. Have you ever been able to go on a vacation and not have to leave early from work? It's hard. Yeah. It's hard because we don't love work-life balance on this podcast. but I did have to leave to do this like shoot on Friday that's like my face is in it so I'm like this is perfect like I'm gonna get a tan yeah and I'm really excited and then Des goes let's go snorkeling by the way never been snorkeling before I'm from Brooklyn we don't snorkel snorkel it's not sky it's not it's not scuba diving it's actually it's so funny because Because you're underwater.

44:42Like, it's intense and you have the little, you're breathing underwater. But if someone, and you feel like you are scuba diving, but if someone looks from the outside, you're just lying in, like, the beginning of the water. Yeah. Just, like, flapping around. Yeah. But it was so beautiful. Did it just the two of you or was it, like, a group of people? It was just the two of us who just went out. And there were all these different colored fish. And there was one fish that was so page-coded. it was like navy with these beautiful polka dots oh my god it was like polka dot perfectly i was like every other fish was like these bright neon colors and this was like navy polka dot just like and had these like cute lips i was like oh my god there's page i kept going page fish she's like sorry i'm on holiday she's on holiday um so i get out of the water and we take our our goggles off sorry i don't know words yeah and he has like a mark on his forehead and i'm like hi you have a mark and he's like so do you and we go and we're eating and he's like by the way like the mark on your forehead's like not going away I'm like that's weird and we get back to the hotel and I look I busted a blood vessel in my forehead because I I snapped it too tight on my face because I was so afraid I was gonna be drowned so I was like I need to make sure that we're going underwater so I made it too tight but the pressure you can't then like you're a blood vessel pop your fucking eyeball no i know i popped a blood vessel in the middle of my forehead where like it was like all like it what did you have a picture no i was like that upset it didn't i'll look and then i'll put in the newsletter but like i start freaking out because i'm like i can't show up to this gig with a huge red like i tried to put makeup on it wasn't working and it wasn't a bump like it didn't hurt it just something popped under my skin and it was like leaking awesome Um, perfect.

46:34So, I'll have vacation. Which it does say. You're like, ah, this is a perfect time to emergency contact. Do anything. You're like, fine, I'll call my mom. I was like, how the fuck did that happen to you? It didn't happen to me. That is so you, though. That is so. If it would happen, it happened. Also, I'm so delusional. By, like, the third day, I was convinced that I was fluent in Spanish. Like, you know, the first day you're like, oh, my God, I can't speak Spanish. And the third day I was like, I know what they're saying. Well, people say that you learn the fastest when you're immersed in it.

47:11I literally was like, oh, okay, they're fighting. Interesting. I fully knew. I was like, well, this is my problem with Spanish. I was trying to learn grammar. Apparently you don't learn grammar first. You learn the words. Grammar lasts. But in school they teach you grammar first. I digress. That's just. Did you see Kristen Stewart doing that interview being like, hey, let me ask you a question. You ever heard of a woman being a method actor? No, because it's not a thing. It's disrespectful and weird. It's so weird. It just says like you have nothing going on at home. You can stay this person, you freak.

47:51Like that's like when Austin Butler like became Elvis and like he's still Elvis. Well, also, it's definitely not ideal. like it definitely throws everyone off on set when like you're at you know crafty and you're like excuse me can I please have some water on the cheeks it's like you're not mcjagger in real life like this is a biopic chill out like if I was married to an actor and he came home and he was that same character I'm like you're not a toddler we're not playing these pretend games anymore I'd have to move out I do think too with acting which is kind of scary like you know Heath Ledger with the Joker.

48:30Yeah. They say like the way you think you know affects your life and if you're in like a really dark character and you're constantly having these like negative thoughts it does affect who you are as a person. Well yeah. People have had like really dark. But I was just so happy she said that because it's like. I love her. Because we had had that whole conversation where like men can talk so passionately about like their careers and about their jobs and like women can't because it's like but you have kids like the same thing with like the Whitney Leavitt like but what are your kids doing it's like what well I've been talking on stage about having kids and I'm like coming up with all these reasons why it could be difficult and I literally just have been splurting out I'm not a male comedian I can't just have a family no I can't just have a family and then joke about my wife and kids on stage every night while my wife is like sewing her butthole and her vagina together again.

49:22Like there are people really don't talk about it. Like I'm type A. I love a plan. I love like, you know, sitting down and being like, what's the next five years? But like women have to do that. Like we have to plan our children because you all turn, everyone turns against you. it's like oh and I'm also planning on my downfall yeah like I'm literally planning my own downfall I'm digging my own grave it's very like out of body experience and I do think it's important we talk about it because we are like second generation of any women having to deal with this I called my mom crying when I realized I have I have to I'm not calling my husband crying you have to test her like is she gonna be perfect she picked up but I obviously was like she's like how are you I'm could she's like are you sure like actually but I basically was crying about like that I think I'm like might become a mom one day and I was so confused as to why I was crying you know when you don't know why you're crying and then I was like looking into it and they were like oh you're grieving your past self like I was literally crying over the death of my identity that I am now that I still am yeah but I know I'm gonna lose I had a man one time asked to move in together and I immediately started crying like no but it's also it's not sad because I'm gonna be that it's just sad that you you're not gonna be what you were realize that it at some point it was gonna be over and it might be 100 better but it's just still like sad to lose anything it probably will be yeah it's just scary and I know male comedians whose wife have had a baby and the next day they're on stage working out material yeah leaving their wife at home the same as like graduating college and then you're going into the real world and you're like, it probably will be better, but this is all I know.

51:13And what do you mean we don't have a mixer on Friday night? Like, it's just like it's a different. You're so Elle Woods. You're so Elle Woods. But you know what? I want to say something positive. It motivates me. Yeah. Like, seeing, like, the Ali Wongs. Well, it also, it's like, how is there even a debate that, like, men or women, that men are better than women? And it's like, guys, we have kids. I actually said this earlier to someone. I can't wait for Gen Z to be at the age where they're having children because they're going to get some things done. Them with their tight, tight boundaries and they have a headache, they must leave.

51:55I'm so pumped for them to get into the position of like people being rude because they're moms or like their jobs changing because they're pregnant. because I can't wait for them to be like, hold on. A man could literally never. So you're not telling me anything. Well, yeah, I face this thing where it's like, okay, I can just accept that other male comedians in stand-up will ascend past me after I have kids. But then I stop and I go, actually, no, I'm going to keep my foot on these bitches' necks because it's going to be difficult and it's going to be hard. And I am lucky because I have a mom who is going to help me.

52:32women can't even post their like after baby body without the internet being like fuck you like if you post your after baby body and you like lost weight people are like how dare you not the norm but if you post it and it's like and you didn't lose weight it's like well why don't you think about your health like there is no right thing for women also why i feel like female comics are so interesting like why people want to hear leanne morgan talk because i'm like i want to hear a woman who's had who has three grandchildren and three babies yeah and has dealt with her husband and like that's fascinating to me like I don't want to hear another dude like make like sly comments about his wife that you know is like so annoyed with him like you're not like she's annoyed with you you're not the cool one on stage right now she's like oh he's doing his little jokes speaking of boundaries have you seen tiktok this drama about salad core like a little bit do you know that i live right next to a solid core which apparently it's like pilates i wouldn't i don't even dare look at it apparently it's pilates but like super intense i'm scared and i'm working on like loving myself so i haven't been going um so this guy who by the way needs to get cast in reality tv like if someone doesn't cast him they're bonkers he's this gay guy in darien connecticut i first saw him because he was just talking about what the Equinox steam room is like and just talking about how married men were trying to hook up with him the whole time, which we have a theme for the pod today.

53:57Wait, the Equinox steam room downtown? In Darien, Connecticut. Oh, because the Equinox. Yeah, it's all the Equinoxes. Everyone's gay. Equinox. He basically was like this guy fully was like flirting with him for six months, showing him his dick, has a wife. So he shows up to, he clearly loves SolidCore more than anything. And he shows up to SolidCore at 6 a.m. The instructor's not there. But the door, he has like a log in. The door's open. He goes in and he's filming it. And he like starts giving himself a private lesson at SolidCore because he loves SolidCore. And then the instructor comes in late and they're just laughing, whatever.

54:32He posts the video. SolidCore starts freaking out. Like, can you take it down? His friend messaged him. But why are they freaking out? Because he was in there by himself. Yeah. And it makes them look unprofessional. And he literally then films a video being like, fuck you, SolidCore, for like telling my friend to tell me to take it down. you're so unprofessional it goes off then next day shows up at the solid core class the 6 a.m class filming it and you hear the lady be like hey that's all I saw like hey and he's like sorry about the video yeah he goes sorry about the video and then I just heard her say well my probation I think so her she's gonna say well my probation um makes me apologize to you or something so he's in like a full feud with this solid core but he keeps showing up because he loves solid core so much he's like they could punch my mom in the face and I would still show up to the solid core class so everyone's like what is it is it like hardcore Pilates okay but so you're not like running or anything no no it's Pilates but just like a strength more intense yeah so yeah I don't want people in the comments are so funny because they're like I know I feel like this is a solid core ad I just can't put my finger on it but then everyone's like I want to have the boundaries and how he's dealing with conflict.

55:46He's not a people pleaser. He's dealing with conflict so well. But the thing is, he is just, he is a man. Yeah. Which helps. But everyone's just watching how he just walks into a class. Like, I would move out of the state if I got, if anyone's mad at me. Well, because if it was a girl, that would be girl on girl crime. Mean girl, mean girl. He's hilarious. He's a star. Put him on reality TV. But yeah, the misogyny of men getting away with so many horrible things and a girl will do one thing that's like off color or like something every girl's done yeah and we're like she's a monster so anyway you're all perfect we love you guys so much we do have some announcements coming up but just stay posted i can't wait to hear them i guess i'll see it on email

56:42Thank you.

57:16Thank you.