Giggling about nails salons, cysts, and chest hair

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1:44Paige DeSorbo: hello my glacial gigglers because you're cool you're a cool cat

1:52Hannah Berner: I hate when I write something on the note And I'm like I'll know what this is You won't It just says screens with our faces on them Actually I do know what that is

2:10Paige DeSorbo: Don't you hate when you think you don't know what it is And then you say it out loud And then you do know what it is And you wish you didn't bring up that you didn't know what it is Do you want to die laughing? Yeah no i saw that already and i wasn't gonna say anything until the pod started

2:25Hannah Berner: she's perfect wait is daphne freaked out by it no she like doesn't like she's like i just can't

2:33Paige DeSorbo: believe they use that picture or whatever she's like there's no copyright infringement going on how are you doll also these fake glasses are they is it reflecting too much for you my fake glasses no if i i can't hear or see with them but i i just feel like it was bringing my look together today yeah it honestly really is i just biked home from the nail salon that's why i'm a little out of breath at what age do you figure out the nail salon because it's wait hannah i went to the nail salon today okay we probably had very different experience what was your let's start with your nice beautiful experience of your culture what did you do um I had to go to the bank

3:17Hannah Berner: so I walked to the bank and then I said oh the nail salon's right around the corner let me go into the nail salon I walk in I say hi do you have a time do you have time for a pedicure it's at this time of the day it's 9 45 in the morning and they said yes pick a color I picked my color I sat down she started doing my toes and I went on TikTok and we did that for about 45 minutes and then I paid and I didn't sit and dry my toes I was wearing flip-flops so I just walked home

3:48Paige DeSorbo: the air dried them for me and that was it that sounds lovely I also just realized the different parts you of the nose you put your fake glasses changes your age like I just became i just became 62 yeah and sorry if you're not watching a video but i'm 62 right now

4:06Hannah Berner: you just became my aunt that i'm like i have a podcast what is this podcast you guys are doing

4:14Paige DeSorbo: what was your nail experience well i walked in it was crowded i was gonna turn around but they made eye contact with me yeah and you know how there's the one alpha she's like in charge she's running stuff and she'll yell from any area she's the gm yes she was in the back at this point so they do this thing we're in front of everyone you have to say what you want yep and she's like what do you need yeah and everyone just stares at me and i'm like first of all i'm shy yeah i'm a really

4:42Hannah Berner: shy person i don't like public speaking wait okay the nail salon i'm not shy yeah because you feel

4:49Paige DeSorbo: at home i feel at home that's like me walking into you know the u.s open i'm chat chatting without talking 10 10 when i walk into a nail salon i say i don't i don't know where i belong yeah so i was like i'm a gel manicure yeah i was just gonna say what were you in there for and i was like gel manicure and she's like do you need us to take it off or do a fill and i was like and that's where you got me yeah and then she goes well is it hard or soft gel i go again i'm even more confused now and then i'm a fucking idiot because i'm i don't know the answers to these questions I'm like I choose C like I don't know so then we sit down like Paige how do you know if you have soft or hard gel and how do you know if you need a fill or not you have hard gel you you needed a whole new nail okay I think they did that but yeah when do you

5:39Hannah Berner: get a fill like okay this is these are my favorite topics Hannah I love when we get on the pod and you're just like hey tell me about your culture and where do you come from in my head i'm just like page will know what's the cuisine you're both most known for like um i get a fill every three weeks i get my nails done every three weeks jacqueline tells me when i need a whole new nail well they saw mine and they redid it and i'm getting a pedicure once a month why don't people

6:16Paige DeSorbo: get pedicure gels because everyone goes manicure gel pedicure regular i'm like get a gel okay when

6:23Hannah Berner: i filmed summer house i would get pedicure gel because it would last way longer well i didn't

6:29Paige DeSorbo: start painting my nails until covid summer house when things were really scary and dark and you said maybe we try something new that was the first time maybe we do something creative something with our hands we take our mind off things that was literally you were like you know what helps me

6:46Hannah Berner: painting my nails i'm like i've never tried that before you know we don't talk about enough from that summer is that they literally put us in a padded room they were like you know what would make them go crazier is if they're already in an insane asylum we didn't have windows we didn't have windows why was it always pitch black i didn't see daylight that wasn't a room that was a basement that was locked yeah that was a basement that could get to the outside i remember being really scared of that door i'm like if anyone's coming in and killing us it's it's us

7:23Paige DeSorbo: there was like a fire at one point remember someone started i love the stuff that doesn't make the cut they're like that's not interesting there was a full fire full fire outside right outside our door you know what's crazy you slept through it i did i didn't and that's so not me well because we would go to bed like 1 30 latest yeah we had stuff to do by stuff we meant love island in the morning how early would we start watching love island i i was really on a continuous loop for me wait i have a another beauty question okay i bought a red light mask what should or you shouldn't have on your face like you can't just put on a red light mask at any time what when in the skincare process do you put it on i like to do it

8:18Hannah Berner: well stumped you it's like clean face like makeup washed off clean face i do my skincare and then i do it because i do it when i'm laying in bed but so i just wait till i'm like dry i wait till i'm not like super like oily and because if i don't put moisturizer on my face i feel like i'm gonna crack no you can put it on and then do red light okay thank god okay i have something for your culture that i want to tell you about this is gonna sound gross i'm telling you me and josephine we can't stop eating it i have enough i should start a segment because it seems like each time I come on the pod I'm like guys wait I love that my culture is stuffing your face continue wait I didn't even do that on

9:04Paige DeSorbo: she goes you like shoving stuff deep into your head you eat past your limits you don't stop when you're full let's talk about your culture you're not eating for energy you're eating to suppress something deeper continue

9:26okay

9:26Paige DeSorbo: I love things that are pickled yes me too okay pickled garlic cloves okay that's divorce

9:36Hannah Berner: no Hannah no Hannah please I'm telling I know I I know that's why I'm specifically telling you about it because one you're gonna love it two it's the pickling of the garlic clove like cuts the like bitterness so you can just like pop them in your mouth it doesn't taste like you're eating garlic cloves are you a vampire no i'm telling you wait where did you rewind rewind where did you learn about this i saw a tiktok of a 12 year old eating garlic cloves out of the fucking jar

10:17Paige DeSorbo: where did you learn about this is this what the kids are doing next time i went grocery shopping I got them it's good for your health I'm assuming okay it's good for your health not as good as like

10:28Hannah Berner: eating just like a raw garlic clove would be but it still has like a lot of benefits for you it's really good for your gut so you guys are just like hanging out like eating your and you pickle it yourself here's the thing about me and Josephine we go through phases with things like one time we you're not working I know that no one time for like three months straight I'm not kidding we gained 10 pounds because we were obsessed with making at-home lattes but like we were doing we were making milkshakes every single day and so right now we're on a garlic clove a pickled garlic clove kick i'm interested if joe smells anything weird because it's possible you know

11:09Paige DeSorbo: when like i made him try it houses smell like their pet and they don't realize it that could Maybe you have garlic coming out of your pores, but you don't know.

11:19Hannah Berner: How dare you? My home smells like a diptyque candle. I smell like Kourtney Kardashian made me in a bio lab. It's not as scented as a regular garlic. You open the top of it, and it's not like you even smell garlic, really. And you like the flavor. yeah it doesn't taste like you're eating a garlic clove if you like things that are pickled you'll like it like you know how you can buy in a jar and it's got like cauliflower and carrots and like peppers and it's all pickled yeah it's like that i feel like this is so hannah coated of you no right when i ate it for the first time i was like i gotta tell my friend hannah about

12:07Paige DeSorbo: these isn't it fun to be hand-coded like so fun telling people stuff and then being like oh

12:13Hannah Berner: you guys have no rules you guys are out here just like living every day the pages are in a cage of misogyny and beauty standards that we've put on ourselves okay you're self-inflicted i feel like i give virgo energy a lot even though i'm not a virgo anyway by the way speaking of candles i really like nest new york candles have you experienced these i feel like they're like not strong enough for me i like us there's a brand it's called big ass candle no and i'm like yeah guys cut to the fucking point no i was doing like a gig and i

12:56Paige DeSorbo: obviously go to the bathroom like 4 000 times during a given day and they had a nest new york candle and you know when you're like checking out the candle and it was like making my day like it smelled so fucking good i was like an addict i was like give me fucking more that sniff

13:08Hannah Berner: let me sniff that i feel like nest you can just like get at the grocery store can't you

13:12Paige DeSorbo: yeah i probably should also it might not be nest and i could i don't want to you know false advertise um the kids left today how are you feeling you know you can't live them you can't

13:25Hannah Berner: live without them they grow up so fast they grow up so i can't believe they're already out of the house you guys are empty nesters bobby i thought he was gonna be more upset i thought i was gonna

13:37Paige DeSorbo: be more upset i'm like oh my god you're leaving and he goes yeah i'm going on an airplane

13:40Hannah Berner: he didn't even turn around and wave

13:45Paige DeSorbo: um but i wanted to shout out genie because she's pregnant their mom with a third and she actually has a tiktok that's great because she's a former nurse a former what's the ones nico nurse so she knows what she's talking about and she's funny so if you're in uh becoming a mom a mom just interested in mom stuff follow mama genie d on tiktok it's funny because she made a tiktok like a couple months ago about something i don't know i don't even know if it was pregnant i think it

14:17Hannah Berner: was like labor related and i saved it and i was like i'm so happy that hannah is related to her so that like when I have a baby, I can just text her and it won't be weird.

14:29Paige DeSorbo: Her videos are super educational, but also funny. Yeah, she's very funny. Anyway, shout out Jeannie. What else is in my notes? Oh, we never commented on I posted something that I was trying to trigger a response from you. I page baited. Oh. And you didn't even respond. I don't know if I saw it. What was that? It was a photo of my nails over my upper thigh. And you could see all of the hair on my upper thigh. I DM'd you. Oh, you did. What did you say?

15:00Hannah Berner: I would never let that go, Hannah. Please.

15:04Paige DeSorbo: I actually think between all the messages of the pages, yours got lost because the pages were like, as a page, I don't know what to be more mad at.

15:12Hannah Berner: Because you want to know what? You send me an insane amount of memes. Like, no, like it's insane.

15:23Paige DeSorbo: You're one of a couple people. that I open up my phone and my only job is to send stuff to you guys.

15:29Hannah Berner: Sorry, I didn't mean for this to sound like I was complaining. I'm not complaining. It fills my day with joy. Des and I have a bad ratio too.

15:37Paige DeSorbo: Because look, I'm a sender. I'm a giver.

15:40Hannah Berner: Now I can't find it. It's possible you responded in your head.

15:44Paige DeSorbo: I typed something up. You might have texted me personally about it.

15:50Hannah Berner: Because I'm at the beginning of August and I don't see it, which means i don't think wow we go through a range of emotions i thought my upper hair looked

16:01Paige DeSorbo: so pretty my upper thigh hair against the sun like it's really sparkly right now in the summer it's like blonde and very cute and soft like peach fuzz i really hope our messages never

16:13Hannah Berner: get subpoenaed because just like scrolling our dms is actually scary hannah look i i'm so supportive of you having long leg hair because like who told us other than the patriarchy that we have to shave like you're not less of a woman because you have hairy legs and undone nails most women have hair on their legs at some point or other i grow hair everywhere my italian boyfriend grows

16:41Paige DeSorbo: hair and that's scary for him and i grow hair in places my irish husband doesn't grow hair

16:47Hannah Berner: so that's something i have to deal with no exactly which leads me to my next point i don't know

16:54Paige DeSorbo: because i am an elder however i heard that the gen z boys come closer are shaving everything and i learned that from some people but i didn't believe them and then i saw a video of young blood are you familiar with young blood for people only listening to audio i'm so sorry

17:20Hannah Berner: right now because are you familiar with young blood is this the audition

17:33Hannah Berner: hannah and i have like you know we have to play that game where it's like you hold the phone up and it says a saying and it's like we say this one because we really have so many but like is this the audition for pippin is just like somewhere you're supposed to be but you don't want to be there so you turn and you say it's audition for pippin and then when i would tour all these

17:55Paige DeSorbo: theaters would have like shows that they would do and then whenever it said pippin i would send it mr people so anyway young blood he was wearing these like crazy he's like a rock star and he's like shirtless and he's wearing these like really low-rise tight leather pants talking about wait pubes yeah yeah yeah yeah and like i wasn't trying to look like i'm not trying to look look it was bare and i just noticed not a pube in sight so he's wearing a low rise like he's acting like old school rock stars except they had their pubes out like they had their and it was it was

18:38Hannah Berner: hot and you'd see like the happy trail they were like hey i have crabs right now yeah you could

18:44Paige DeSorbo: see the crabs crawling through their pubes he's shaven yeah it's gonna get what's it called like You know when a guy shaves his chest and you put your head on his chest? Literally, it's prickly. Why are they doing it? I don't know. Am I one of these old people that's like, everyone should have a bush. But I don't think guys should be shaving their pubes.

19:10Hannah Berner: Unless you're a drag queen. Sometimes Giggly Squad is Mad Libs and it's just you say things and I try.

19:19Paige DeSorbo: I actually never finish a sentence. So I just say a thought and you try to guess. Also, the gays can shave because they're perfect. They're expressing themselves. Well, they're doing things.

19:29Hannah Berner: They have stuff to do, you know?

19:32Paige DeSorbo: Yes, yes. I mean, some of these guys are shaving their legs.

19:35Hannah Berner: It's come to my attention that over the years, they're shaving more and more. I was at the beach recently and I came across a group of men and I realized they all had their armpits shaved. Now, in the summer, does it get a little squirrely? Are you going to take a scissor, maybe trim a little so it's not popping out? Totally. Fully shaven? No. No.

19:57Paige DeSorbo: But you know, there have been moments that I've been shaving and I've been waxing and I said, the men should have to deal with this too. But now that they are.

20:05Hannah Berner: I like chest hair.

20:07Paige DeSorbo: Are you kidding? I love it. Show me that you're a man. Yeah.

20:10Hannah Berner: Like your mom's chest hair. Like, yeah, I love it.

20:13Paige DeSorbo: Look, everyone has different tastes and some girls might like a baby dolphin-esque man. Yeah. instead of shaving your legs like build a business build a business call your children

20:27Hannah Berner: work fight the patriarchy with us oh i want a man to care about his appearance and the way he presents himself to the world yeah no no i don't want a man who is doing routines that i do to look like me like to be me you know you're there's something nice about being with a man who doesn't

20:49Paige DeSorbo: have to worry about if his legs are shaven or not and if you're worrying and I'm worrying that's a

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25:25Hannah Berner: speaking of um men somebody was dming me a bunch of people were dming me about my toolbox i actually got some dms about your toolbox too a lot of girls were like really interested in my toolbox and i was like oh my god i'll like put a link should you start a toolbox business for girls and I just put all my ex-boyfriends in it um and I got a question and someone was like what where do you keep your bolt cutters like living in New York City like where do you like where do you keep your bolt cutters in apartment living and like how often are you pulling them out wait what's a bolt cutter remember when remember when I lived in that one building and they locked my storage unit because they said I didn't pay the fee and I was like not only did I pay the fee I paid twice for one month and you like and you guys wouldn't give me my fifty dollars back and you're clearly over it so they locked my storage unit and I said uh-uh honey call the police on me so I ordered bolt cutters on Amazon and I bolt cutted it off I said you're not gonna lock up my

26:30Paige DeSorbo: stuff that I paid for you never told us this did you put on like a black mask when you went down

26:37Hannah Berner: to do it no but you want to know what I whipped them up like I'm walking down to the storage unit door and see my bolt cutters. So whatever. Someone was like, where do you keep your bolt cutters? And I started laughing hysterically because I keep them next to my bed because I don't own a gun. I don't own a gun and I don't intend on owning a gun. But God forbid someone gets through my door is bolted and gets into my bedroom you have another bolt coming your way and it's my bolt

27:13Paige DeSorbo: cutters every now that i forget you're you're just a small town girl you know you're just a small town girl and you're living in a big city by myself i'll stop them you're not giving me

27:26Hannah Berner: my bedroom no you're not like you're literally not i think i have so much rage for men that like if a man really did try and like do something to me i would it my fight or flight would be insane

27:42Paige DeSorbo: and you know you have your do you keep them under your bed or like not visible like next to your

27:48Hannah Berner: vibrator no that she's in a cute little box tucked away she can't be seen no i keep them like leaning up against my nightside table so that if i hear someone i can grab them i'm not shuffling around under my bed things happen fast hannah they happen quick you've got to be able to move

28:08Paige DeSorbo: no i'm so you just live life in fight or flight you're just like no actually with the podcast every now and then there's like a little sound in the breeze and page would be like someone's breaking in and we have to wait three minutes for you to make sure no one's broken into the house for you to continue the podcast it's we've actually lost years of our life to this there's a lot of freaks out there okay and

28:33Hannah Berner: for whatever reason i draw them in there's a lot of freaks you can't trust them no you can't trust them which brings me to my next point may i i don't know what's going on in the universe but the lindsey clancy case at the same time as the hayden penitier situation and we talked about Hayden Penetier last pod but I don't I didn't like I thought oh she had a she overdosed or she like took her own life she had a really tough life things that are coming out that the ex-boyfriend that she had a restraining order against that him and his brother were at the scene of the crime the month her restraining order was up and in her last building her building put pictures up of the ex-boyfriend like if you see this man he's not allowed in this building like please call the police he was like immediately gave whatever drugs she was on like to the police like brought a bag

29:30Paige DeSorbo: of drugs like he was so helpful did they declare it not a homicide already i don't think so i think

29:38Hannah Berner: they just said like investigating i don't think they declared it anything so many things that

29:43Paige DeSorbo: happened in nashville like happened in our life and one of the things with nashville one of the singers had a stalker ex-boyfriend who was like showing up at the studio yeah and all the drama of that but anyway we don't know the facts right i also want to say with the lindsey clancy's trial again there's tons of conspiracies out there yeah but at least we can raise awareness to

30:05Hannah Berner: postpartum depression yeah hayden went through it and it's crazy that we have to have like all these different defense mechanisms rather than like dealing with the actual problem of like certain men but I think like one of the things that makes me feel the safest is is like I'm always telling my friend something like I feel like throughout your 20s you go through different relationships and you maybe get into a relationship where you fight a lot and you tell your friend about it and then you get that first boyfriend who's like don't tell your family or your friends anything about us and that is one of the biggest red flags speaker right now yeah like and I know there are a lot of people like yeah don't tell your family because then like if you stay you know you don't want them and there is definitely boundaries like I'm not calling up my mom for every little thing but things that I find big I'm telling her about it and I'm telling my friends because god forbid something happens I want my friend to be like actually she didn't think that and so like with Hayden I wish someone would be like she would never have been with him anyway i'm not a lawyer or anything but i feel strongly about it it has to be looked into for

31:19Paige DeSorbo: sure um but you are definitely on conspiracy tiktok i'm just home eating pickled garlic

31:27Hannah Berner: minding my own business watching reenactments of murders that could have possibly happened ends speaking of other celebrities yeah i watched the travis barker documentary

31:45Paige DeSorbo: very interesting yeah very interesting he's like poor kid gets kicked out of his home early because mom dies where is he from i actually don't know the mom early on was like this kid's going to be a drummer and the mom like would sit with him and make sure he would do all his practices and his before she died she was like make sure he becomes a musician like she like

32:11Hannah Berner: knew he was special how old was he when she died i think in his teens so he immediately started

32:18Paige DeSorbo: acting out whatever but he gets he gets in a band gets picked up by another band and then blink 182 was on the rise and he was at a festival with them and their guy dropped out the day before and they They were like someone was like Travis is like the best drummer. You should just have him do this gig. And he learned everything in one night. And they were just like we got to get this guy. Wow. How old is he? I feel like he was early 20s. The thing with Travis I guess that like I didn't know is like he really is considered one of the best drummers of all time. I didn't know he was. I didn't know that.

32:52Paige DeSorbo: But I say Blink 182. It is the best of like you make this last forever and ever and ever.

33:00Hannah Berner: Where is the music like that anymore? Like, I feel like our first two years of high school, that's all it was. Like, All-American Rejects and, like, Green Day. I feel like there's no bands like that anymore. I just can't wait. Very first day. The men are too busy shaving their goddamn stomachs.

33:23Paige DeSorbo: Meanwhile, Travis was just getting, well, he was getting tons of tats because he also was the millennial time where like remember people were like if you get tattoo you'll never get a job yeah so you remember when people tell you that wait that is similar to like you won't have a calculator yeah travis he like got it on his neck to like make sure he had no plan b and it's like because entrepreneurs weren't a thing influencers weren't a thing it was like if you got a neck tattoo you're you better be a sculpturist or a musician yeah so he like blows up fast forward also he's produced some of like the best songs ever he also does a lot of production anyway he gets in a plane crash and it's not any plane crash because travis has always been scared to flying yeah every flight he would take he would call his dad just in case like he was naturally a nervous flyer he is with four people two of them don't make it him and this dj make it but he was burned from the neck down oh i didn't know that yeah and they had to literally like him and dj am and dj am was the other one who was recovered better like he it wasn't he didn't have bad of a burn and but they said dj am was weirdly like calm about the whole thing where travis was like clearly fucking traumatized yeah they almost said it was weirder that dj am was so calm they were like what's he actually going through and dj am was sober and interesting yeah he was but then he OD'd.

35:08Hannah Berner: Yeah, I died of a drug overdose. Okay.

35:10Paige DeSorbo: So Travis recovers from the flying. He tells Blink-182, I'm not flying anymore. If we do a Europe trip, I'm taking a cruise. So he takes a cruise whenever they have a Europe tour to Europe on a boat. And just drives? And then drives around Europe or however he does it. But then he talks about his love story with Courtney. and like i know it's these documentaries it's like so their perspective but like his perspective was he's always known her she's been a neighbor she was just a friend and he had and he never thought he'd find love again like he'd been through divorces he honestly

35:50Hannah Berner: like almost didn't want to live anymore and how she was there for him and then that moment where

35:58Paige DeSorbo: you realize that this is more than a best friend like i'm in love and he never imagined that she would like love him back and then i guess she got out of her relationship and then like he basically is like i felt like a teenager again in love which i know like the media is just like they just keep licking each other but i think that they it's a really cool story of two people like finding love

36:20Hannah Berner: later in life is so yeah cute because he's not even later and they're they're only 40 i know but

36:27Paige DeSorbo: it was literally like it felt like a first love for them yeah like it was giving like this is my first love they're obsessed with each other then they're having so much trouble having a baby she had like miscarriage i think and all this stuff and she's religious and she was like god will give us a baby if we're meant to have one i think they did ivf it wasn't working and then one day she was just like i'm pregnant pregnant and yeah now it's just like he's definitely been through a lot of shit um but it's funny the kardashians love a man who's who's going through

37:03Hannah Berner: it i wonder if throughout any of like the fame of the kardashians if obviously like we don't hear about it if they're not famous but i wonder if they did at any point try and date like normal guys just to see like oh maybe i could date a normal guy or if they're just like no not worth

37:25Paige DeSorbo: the problem with being that famous is if you date a normal person they immediately are not normal and you ruin their privacy life yeah they're like go back to work have fun like it's like dalton gomez or like he was just a real estate agent ariana's ex oh my god i thought you're talking

37:46Hannah Berner: about like the new york city high school i'm like what the hell does that have to do with anything like you didn't even watch gossip girl what are you talking about you don't know him like i know

37:58Paige DeSorbo: him um so yeah i feel like other stuff probably happened but that was the gist of it is just he had but he's a crazy hard worker he's passionate and i feel like courtney's been good for like oh yeah he finally started to take care of himself wait so does he fly now oh yes that was the point of the story so he basically said one day he woke up and he was like i'm ready to fly and his children he instilled it in his children his children are scared of flying both kids are like dad this is a death sentence do not fly mind you i feel like the

38:34Hannah Berner: kardashians fly like six times a day hello there's kylie air kim air well they're in there right now

38:41Paige DeSorbo: so i don't know how they dated unless courtney just like isn't traveling as much or she's like he just didn't go maybe or he was like i'll see you in four days i'm driving she's like okay but she basically he basically says i'm ready to fly he goes plan a trip don't tell me about the trip until 24 hours in advance because i can't have too much time to think about it so one day she's like we're going to mexico tomorrow oh i want someone to do that for me no like it was really romantic yeah and she's like we're going to mexico tomorrow and she said he freaked out and they like obviously it was like a big private plane and she's holding his hand and they get on and they just helped each other overcome stuff which

39:24Hannah Berner: was a nice love rom-com honestly i could overcome pretty much anything on a private flight

39:33Paige DeSorbo: like i'll get over any of it but he he was on a private flight when it crashed

39:39Hannah Berner: yeah that's scary as fuck to actually be on a plane crash is to be in a situation where you should have died and people did but you didn't must feel i couldn't imagine you probably feel guilty for living guilt the survivor guilt yeah

39:59Paige DeSorbo: he's just like why am I here especially when it was his gig like he made everyone else come for him which was really hard for him but ultimately he lost his mom he lost his friends like he lost a lot of things so to see him keep his head up and get through his addiction and like have a loving family right now was it's inspirational that whatever you're going through there's light at the end of the tunnel which leads me to women's time of the week oh fuck yeah i have two mickey fisher is realized that once you open a bottle of wine if you lose the cork you can put a tampon in it yeah we could have been using tampons this whole time wait yeah why didn't anyone think of that like period done way better than a cork and you never get stuck you just pulled out with the string hello oh my god then you could put it in your pussy and get drunk sorry sorry kim sorry kim that was isn't it crazy that there was a time

41:05Hannah Berner: where kids were doing that look the kids have been crazy i don't know what they're up to wait oh my god i said something the other day and i go kids are crazy and i was like i can't even remember what it is what it was

41:21Paige DeSorbo: do you remember we used to wear sophie shorts rolled up like to my spine like it was we'd wear the tiniest little sophie shorts and nowadays if a girl wears tiny jeans i'm like is she okay

41:34Hannah Berner: i'm like that can't be comfortable i can't be comfortable someone said that rip gen z has an equivalent to ripped jeans but i literally can't remember what it is but it's like their version of I'm not buying jeans with rips in them already. It's something weird that they wear. I forgot. Whatever.

41:55Paige DeSorbo: My woman of STEM of the week runner-up is Mama Riss on Instagram. She can't keep these little bushes green. So she started spray painting them green, and they look really good. Sometimes the water just doesn't do its job. Where is this? In her lawn. in her lawn. Yeah, she has like a little cute and they were like turning brown all the time and she said, you know what? I'm gonna take this in my own hands. And sometimes that's just what you have to do. Yep, truly.

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45:59Paige DeSorbo: You got mad at me this week.

46:01Hannah Berner: Did I for what?

46:02Paige DeSorbo: Because of my cyst.

46:04Hannah Berner: Because, Hannah. So if you know anything about me, you know that I love a pimple, I love a boil, I love a cyst, I love an ingrown. Oh my God, Hannah. I'm actually like, I don't even want to say it on the pod because I don't want anyone to repeat it. Just whisper it. okay so we're talking about like nipple hairs like a couple weeks ago and i'm just like i can't believe we talked about that on giggly squad you were really excited to talk about it hannah the other day i looked down i had eight i almost went to just show you why was i i had an ingrown nipple hair was in two pores i go so it looked like you had a nipple on your nipple i go there's no way i had to take tweezers and like scratch the top of the skin so i could like get it disgusting how did you let it get

47:02Paige DeSorbo: to that point are you not even exfoliating your nipples i feel like you can't it's too sensitive

47:08Hannah Berner: you can't exfoliate nipples i was like how long did i let this go wait us weekly please please be like page overcomes i can't believe the new york times printed that the photo editor of the

47:24Paige DeSorbo: new york times needs a raise because i didn't send i sent a video they were like can you send a video and i sent like a pretty photo of me on seth meyers smiling they were like no we'll screenshot i have to buy well i have to buy the new york times i have to buy it i think i'm gonna take a photo with

47:41Hannah Berner: it um no we have to buy it what were we just saying oh my cyst hannah has a calls me i would say end of spring beginning summer is when we like you told me about the cyst oh yeah i showed it on the pod oh yeah she's been there for quite a while and i said let me go with you when you pop it and hannah sends me this dumb i honestly was more insulting that you sent the picture rather than just being like the cyst popped on its own like i squeezed it you sent like it had like a little bit of red blood like there's no pus nothing you're like oh popped it i was like fuck you

48:20Paige DeSorbo: no no i thought she was gonna like that i sent her any information about my cyst because she

48:26Hannah Berner: loves that stuff holding the phone taking a video i wanted to see two thumbs come in squeeze I wanted what was gonna come out in this screen okay my side of the story was

48:41Paige DeSorbo: I just accepted I had this like thing on my back because my grandpa gets them and I was like feeling connected there I was like it's a generational thing most Hannah coded at a certain point as a

48:52Hannah Berner: burner you start getting stuff on your back and they are humps and they're humps them they're part

48:57Paige DeSorbo: of life look i'm a canvas for my cyst so i but it was so thick like you couldn't squeeze it so i was like this isn't a pimple but it kept growing and then i was like with my whole family and at some point someone started someone saw it in my bathing suit and the whole family was like you gotta get

49:13Hannah Berner: checked you gotta get checked there's nothing an italian family loves more than when a member of the family has something that they can all physically look at touch and potentially squeeze

49:29Paige DeSorbo: like oh my god everyone had an opinion but then yeah they're all looking at they go oh i had one

49:37Hannah Berner: of those does it hurt put a hot pack have you hot packed it the amount of times in my life i've been asked if i've hot packed something i'm like i haven't gotten around to it when something's on

49:49Paige DeSorbo: my back i forget about it i forgot i had it right i did do a shoot with lululemon and maybe i'll post it somewhere i they were like turn around we want to see the back of the sports bra and i turned around like okay get this sick back like it's gonna look sick yeah you're like you weren't expecting this ass they sent the photo there's a huge cyst on my back that i forgot about and i'm her modeling like giving cunt giving baddie you know everyone oh and i'm just there like is it

50:20Hannah Berner: gorgeous is my back gorgeous it's talking it's like i'm actually help me it's like i needed i

50:27Paige DeSorbo: deserve a day rate for this shoot so they're like hannah get a dermatologist appointment i go don't even know where to start with that so genie takes it upon herself the nurse gets me a doctor's appointment oh i'm gonna say operated like on the kitchen no no that's what you want that's like your little freaky like dream so then my phone starts blowing up with them like calling me to like ask questions so like that's why i hate the doctor but like i guess you have to do this stuff and i'm like please email me anyway so did you go yet well i was i was supposed to go but then i'm thinking about it and i'm in the shower and it actually was kind of itching me yeah it started to get itchy so i said what if i just it's hot in here i said what if i squeeze a tiny bit so i I squeezed a tiny bit.

51:11Paige DeSorbo: I looked at my finger and there was white stuff on it. Yeah. So I said, let's go time. It's go time, baby. I was doing it for like 10 minutes. No mirror. Just squeezing raw dog. But like with the hot shower. So I'm going in different positions. And it's the it kept pussing. You're just basically you're blind back there. Going in blind. Yeah. And then I was like, OK, it's definitely flatter. And I took a photo and it was super red. And that's why I sent it to you because you're my doctor. and then I went finally to the derm yesterday and they were like yeah it's a pimple yeah it's just a cyst well she called it cyst and I was like I don't know a cyst is just a big pimple yeah just like a deeper like deeper in your skin do you like me more when I have my cyst or when I don't no I like you when you don't have your cyst okay good but she said that it's probably going to keep growing back unless i cut it out yeah you got to get the bulb you got to get the bulb a bit yeah so i can't swim for two weeks if i do surgery and i was like i play mermaid with lois every day so she'd get really mad at me but like because of stitches oh really they would have to

52:25Hannah Berner: do stitches on it okay that must be it's a big one i need an updated pic because now i'm gonna watch the progression on if it grows back yeah let's see it we've talked about it oh it's a lot of times this summer it's been you showing us things and us having to lean in and really look actually i feel like it's like is it like gone no oh well genie's getting mad at me

52:56Paige DeSorbo: because on tic-tac shop they have really good like kids stuff for like 13 so she's like lois does not need more purple sparkly dresses and i'm like but that's what she loves and she's like we can't fit this many purple sparkly dresses in her closet i'm like she'll make it work

53:13Hannah Berner: if lois will do anything she'll make it work well you could start a closet at your house

53:18Paige DeSorbo: i'm gonna imagine she has her own walk-in closet when she comes she would love it you could like

53:23Hannah Berner: be like this is like your princess closet and you could just do it with all like costume like princessy stuff send lois over for a week i know we were walking in town yesterday and she goes

53:34Paige DeSorbo: i'm gonna go in this store picks the most expensive italian

53:40Hannah Berner: store leather she walks into lauro piano and she's like i'll take this this two of those

53:46Paige DeSorbo: hannah's gonna need a lot yeah we walk in they're like ciao everything has been imported from italy this morning and she's looking around and she's like yes no yes she's touched and she's not she's not touching stuff like a toddler would she's touching it like like she's not like sweat she's like she's like she pulls out like a little eye thing where she

54:10Hannah Berner: like a magnifier where she's like she's like what count thread is this she's like real diamonds no

54:16Paige DeSorbo: that's giving swarovski crystal um she yeah she goes just loves expensive things and she's like hannah get this hannah get that and i'm like lois i've been with you for three weeks i'm out of money and patience and patience um also i called you during dinner regarding sterling point do i

54:42Hannah Berner: I have like the worst memory ever. When did you call me during dinner? Who was eating? You or I? I was.

54:52Hannah Berner: During my.

54:54Paige DeSorbo: See, if I'm eating, you're eating. It's our dinner.

54:57Hannah Berner: Clock it. Clock it. If I'm eating, you're eating. Girls, gal. Girls, girls. Wait, when? I don't even remember.

55:05Paige DeSorbo: I called you because someone texted me and was like, hey. Oh, yeah. A giggler realized when we went to the Knicks game a couple years ago, one year, two years, we were sitting next to Skylar Gisondo, who is a big time actor. I'd never seen him in anything, so I didn't know.

55:23Hannah Berner: He's going to be in the new Meet the Parents with Ariana Grande. Iconic.

55:28Paige DeSorbo: Sitting next to my dad, just kiki with my dad, the sweetest, kindest guy. And he was with his girlfriend, who I think I was sitting next to. she's an actress getting talking yapping gossiping whatever i haven't seen sterling point yet but we were sitting next to we were saying what's her name ella rubin ella rubin so i you guys i'm friends with ella rubin if anyone i mean she we're kind of when you sit through a whole

55:57Hannah Berner: basketball game together you were three people away from her no no yes because it went my dad me you your dad her boyfriend her I think it's possible it is I remember that but you did talk to her in the back room I remember you at a table of people and you were talking to them so I think you did have conversation so yeah you're friends so we're friends um everyone's talking about Sterling Point I need to watch it you have to watch it it's you want to know what one of the best things about it is you feel like they're really their age they're really talking to each other the way they were and I think people are nervous about like AI writing scripts like it felt very real like whatever was happening oh so it's good it's cute and she's just like so beyond gorgeous that when she's she's the type of pretty that I love to watch like you don't care what she's doing on the screen your eyes are so drawn to her she's so captivating well let's be honest you love a brunette i love a curly hair brunette you love a curly hair brunette don't get me started on a curly hair brunette i just speaking of one of my favorite curly hair brunettes margaret qualley just went to a uh did you see she went to a movie premiere and she wore the new chanel sandals that like don't have a front here's the thing and i'm not just saying this because they're chanel they're iconic yeah in the sense of they're editorial no one's buying them and going to the bodega for that situation and a celebrity to be wearing at an event like so cool am i going and

57:47Paige DeSorbo: buying them no it wasn't just clickbait it was like if you're gonna wear these for people who don't know it's just a heel and you're like the rest of your foot's just out

57:56Hannah Berner: but it has a chanel logo and it wraps around your ankle and then that's it foot to ground

58:02Paige DeSorbo: it's art it's art it's art i love how someone was like i can't believe a celebrity actually wore these chanel flats i'm like that's what being a celebrity is for is finding the craziest thing on the runway and showing up in it i mean that's me that's what i would do no i think that

58:18Hannah Berner: No, it's. And how you make it work. Yeah, it's expressing yourself. Fashion is art. And it's like, yeah, I'm obviously walking a red carpet and then I'm going to put real shoes on. This is for the picture. Yeah.

58:30Paige DeSorbo: It's for the pic. So shout out Margaret. Also, she's single right now.

58:33Hannah Berner: Yeah.

58:34Paige DeSorbo: It's giving, freeing her foot, freeing her life from men.

58:40Hannah Berner: It's giving free foot pics because I'm ready. Yes.

58:45Paige DeSorbo: Yes. Yes. Yes. we're obsessed with you margaret would you if your name was margaret would you go by marge i would you would well you can't go by margie i think i'd go by maggie is maggie short for

59:00Hannah Berner: i think so what would maggie be short for magenta wait i keep seeing videos on tiktok and it's girlfriends showing their boyfriends a list of words and being like pronounce this and they can't do it and i know it's it pissed me off it actually pissed me off because i'm like you're like 25 and you can't see the word chalet and no like epitome you can't see that word and no some of them okay there's some random doozies

59:36Paige DeSorbo: Pierre de terre hello no one went to french class no one has an ounce of culture wait what's it called when you walk in and it's that little room when you walk in like a foyer yeah yeah it's my one of my favorite words that you say um last question and hardest question of the night where

59:56Hannah Berner: are we doing questions you use some speak in game show host like sometimes you'll start a sentence and it's like okay and now we're back welcome back what we who's gonna win this one this is

1:00:14Paige DeSorbo: the question if you were this is online if you were a finger which finger are you i'm pinky

1:00:24Hannah Berner: all day you don't expect much from me i'm not holding things on my own i'm basically there for a show leave me alone but you can change

1:00:40Paige DeSorbo: a sip from a normal sip to an elegant sip oh i have a lot of power also when you're evil

1:00:47Hannah Berner: you use your pinky like i've picked things with this pinky now yeah what are you are pinky i was arguably gonna say your ring finger okay and why because it's giving star power it's where

1:01:01Paige DeSorbo: the jewelry is it's but i actually think pinky is more independent ring finger like needs a man

1:01:08Hannah Berner: yeah i would say ring finger is like super misogynistic and i'm like shocked you picked that I thought you were going to immediately go middle.

1:01:15Paige DeSorbo: I just thought ring finger, I was just thinking of diamonds, but I didn't think deep enough and I apologize for misconstruing your identity.

1:01:24Hannah Berner: I think you're middle finger because you make a statement without saying anything to your haters. You're like, hey, just watch this. And they know.

1:01:36Paige DeSorbo: Wait, do you respect me because of how I deal with my enemies? How do you deal with them? I don't. yeah i do respect you i was gonna say pointer finger because she's she's active she's a little thicker than the other fingers and she'll try anything once

1:02:01Paige DeSorbo: i don't even know why that's funny but it's so funny i actually can argue that also i think i'm a thumb because thumbs are hand-coated i was not like a megan fox thumb but like a normal and i don't mean to shame megan fox but like it's funny that the most beautiful girl in the world has a little a little thumb but the thumb is a little too positive yeah yeah it's a little corny it's a little too much yeah you're

1:02:26Hannah Berner: right i'm a middle finger yeah you're a middle finger and you're a pinky yeah and i don't know

1:02:31Paige DeSorbo: why you're trying to deny yourself what's grace oh she might be pointer finger she might be pointer

1:02:40Hannah Berner: for sure because she is like very in charge and like like she's in charge of the rest of them like she's basically telling yeah because we're showmen you know you're you're like this i'm going

1:02:55Paige DeSorbo: like this to people she's telling people yeah she's making sure things are in order she's counting

1:03:01Hannah Berner: she's the liaison between you and the thong who don't get along they're always fighting over which action is better and so grace has to be in the middle to be like no no no well i'm all the way on the end like don't talk you don't know what's going on

1:03:19Paige DeSorbo: don't care tanning okay well that was really really fun thank you for playing that game with us um tomorrow i have my cat cafe so i'm really excited i'm getting glam for it i turned into you

1:03:32Hannah Berner: hell yeah the cats deserve glam they're coming in full glam have you seen their cat eyes so i'm

1:03:40Paige DeSorbo: getting glam we're gonna be kicking it's gonna be fun i'll let you guys know how it goes and i love that talk to you guys later bye Bye.

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