Giggling about networking, nervous stomachs, and tough mudders

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2:00I mean the day just got away from me hello what's up my gorgeous gigglers okay she's awake Paige was like let's record at 8am and I'm like okay well I'm tired you go oh now you're yawning now you're yawning you were so confident that was a good one that was a good deal i was so confident you want to know what i don't i don't know what day it is like i didn't have a week fashion week actually fucked you up plus you were like the face of the nfl because we're a sports podcast so wait what the fuck i think they thought you were a sports reporter i think they were like erin andrews went brunette i was sitting in a box with jadakiss so iconic and um Jose Alvarado yes the Knicks player and so like I figured oh yeah they're gonna take your picture in like the merch and like we might put it on like the Giants Instagram and I was like totally of course like I'll do whatever you need and really I got this I only got the tickets because my brother wanted to go and so then when I saw the page six video I was like wait guys it's like not that big of a deal that i'm at the giants game like no one gives a fuck that i'm at the giants game i do i really do actually all the gigglers were waiting the best thing about the gigglers is there's all these sports pages that occasionally will post us or just a woman or just someone that looks like a woman anything close to long hair they freak out they're really mad about it then there was the you the w the atp is like the sorry it's so fucking early you guys it but i like it when it's early because i have the thoughts of the day haven't hit me yet like this is our purest form these are souls this is like when you're supposed to meditate i haven't been tainted by anything yet today i haven't checked an email no one's bothered me um so yeah the atp tour posted like all the celebrities and i was sitting in front of jaylen brunson but it was like honestly he's the best pick i've ever taken sitting in front of jay and benson like no you looked gorgeous and you were like you were like so unaware of the camera for the first time in my life by the way no so you can pick up on like wait she's just being naturally pretty by the way i've never not been aware of a camera the u.s.o was the only time that they're able to catch me in my natural habitat oh and I was so into the match but anyway the comments it's 400 gigglers being like tag had a fucking burner and then if anyone said anything like who is that girl they go she played division one tennis and she deserves to be there she deserves to be there no they're so funny it made my life someone like didn't like my shoes and the gigglers were like um she actually planned this outfit and it's actually perfect for a football game you wouldn't you don't know what you're talking about there were valid concerns about my outfit with chelsea handler at the us open i just want to talk about it yeah now as you guys know my truth is admin is not my strong suit also if you listen to the pod and you're a real one you know i didn't know i was going to us open that day i forgot that i told chelsea handler yeah i'll come to you so much with you you want her to just whip out an entire full Ralph Lauren look.

5:47I'm not Paige Audi de Sorbo. I don't I don't have a closet full of just oh for a U.S. Open night. She didn't see something on a website in February 2024 and think one day I'll wear this to the U.S. Open and just have it in her closet. So I had an outfit planned for a fashion week party which if you look at it in that lens you're like oh I could totally see you know in Soho Hannah walking in with that. We couldn't be more different so then i was like how do we make this tennis and then there's this amazing harlem designer that i found she has like 2 000 followers and she has this um it's called four seas official and she has this tennis bag that i had her courier it to me and i was like now the outfit is tenis and but granted yeah i looked like a little club rat but then also it's u.s open it's u.s open nighttime but it also kind of yeah it also kind of gave like wait she's like cool she's not like yeah she's not coming to the u.s open and wearing like a maxi skirt with a collared shirt you know like that was the first time it actually kind of like worked in a in like an early 2000s one i kind of felt like i was the celebrities that go to the um coachella who were like we've been here so many times we're just gonna wear whatever no you were like a senior you were a senior at the us by the way we have so much to talk about no i have so much i guess i'll just get mine out of the way of the us open thing where look you guys i oh first of all andy cohen he was there andy cohen i don't know if you saw this andy cohen gets interviewed by like i think it was like the espn girls who you know are gigglers and they're like andy which bravo lebrity would you want to be your doubles partner and they're like so excited you could tell they're like setting him up and he's like huh like complete no idea he's like couldn't he couldn't pull a name like goes on a little too long being like what what who and they're like hannah burner and he's like oh hannah yeah i love and then i'm like did i not make it clear enough on bravo that i play tennis i feel like you did i feel like you said it enough times did you guys play tennis apparently not it was like part of the reason they fired you no literally they were like if tennis comes out of her mouth one more time we're gonna have to pull the plug there were like three guys that were like wait she's actually really good get her off the show so someone said their favorite part was when someone was having a fight and i was in the background playing tennis they were like i feel like you're just here for the zip line oh my god grace is gonna kill me you're not recording no i was recording my volume was all the way down oh it's okay oh yeah okay so then um we got there i'm really good friends with a girl who works for the usta if you don't the usta is the united states tennis association now as you guys know i'm not a good networker i'm not going up any ladders and hannah that's one thing we're really aligned with like when i graduated college i feel like people were like and then you have to network and you have to network and i'd get a pit in my stomach and let me just tell you something i've never networked in my life i've never asked someone for coffee i've never seen someone in a room and fuck off no they have to come to me and then we'll hit it off because it's natural um so i happen to play tennis with this girl le pop shout out chelsea since we're like 10 years old and we weren't like friends per se but we we never had beef which is actually huge so like if you haven't had beef with someone who you play junior tennis with you're like we're best friends you're basically sisters and then she went on to play for illinois and i went to play for for wisconsin anyway long story short she texted me she was like if you want to go to the semis let me know i got you i was like amazing i'll go come with chelsea so we come in and they're like okay let's take your seats we're walking past sierra and russell wilson who went to wisconsin go badgers we walked past on a winter i'm like okay it's kind of weird we walked past jaylen brunson and ben stiller i'm like okay i'm so crazy they put me in the best seat of the house right behind the server me chelsea and then brian valhalle is the usa president i realize wait what's his last name i like that valhalle he's he's also one of the like first out former tennis players like he's an icon i that is so inspiring yeah and he's and he's running the usta which is really really fucking cool so anyway it was just brian being like can i sit next to chelsea handler someone's like how'd you get there i'm like i think the guy just wanted to like laugh the whole time in the front and then you know that i was i i thought i was coaching tiafo well that's what i want to do at a tennis match i want to just laugh the whole time did you feel pressure being in that seat i trained my whole life for this moment yeah when i tell you i was like locked i was locked in to the point that i was like foe let's go foe foe breathe okay i'm gonna need you to breathe right now come on you're like eyes wait did you ever think about being a tennis coach in that moment i was you know oh as you guys know my dad was my coach and he coached the begins girls tennis team i come from a line of coaches i love coaching and you know what i coach the giglers every day and one day i will be a coach if you yawn one more time after you told us to record at 8 a.m with your long fingers blocking your mouth i can see that yawn i know i'm sorry i'm just i'm a working i'm a busy gal i had to fit it in this morning honestly you did this to me last week so wait you're so right you're so right yeah even um i met lindsey vaughn for the first time did you obsessed with her obsessed lindsey vaughn is the skier yes now lindsey the greatest of all time skier um she also we were such girls because we met and within five minutes we were talking about like dating and like how to just like the deepest possible chat like men would never understand that and i like when you meet a girl and you have this like like the first thought that you both have is like we don't know each other but like you're a girl and i'm a girl so like also as two former athletes combined many olympic titles we really connected over that okay oh we're sitting with lindsey vaughn and renee stubbs renee stubbs eyes light up someone just walked in it's jaylen brunson and ali brunson from the knicks the king and the first lady of new york now ali brunson's a giggler and arguably like my best friend so she's like i haven't met jaylen yet when i tell you this man's an angel yeah he he looks like he's really nice you know how like people have an aura his aura is so good and calming but he also is silly like he was one i've met a lot of male athletes that like won't make eye contact with women in the room and then when you say something funny they like don't hear it he literally was looking for the next joke like he like wanted to laugh and was like down to clown and was so funny and cute so we're all and he has a podcast with josh and i feel like i'm like josh and you're like jaylen so anyway regardless we're having fun i'm not embarrassing myself like i'm feeling good i'm like two honey dips sips in honeydew sips which is like i like honey dip though i know what's a honey dip i don't know but i like that you're like she's cute she's yeah then ben stiller comes up am i supposed to be saying all this information anyway yeah this is crazy this sounds like a this sounds like a made-up story Ben Stiller came up he was like no Ben Stiller well first of all he everyone's saying hi because we're all like you know just it's Ben Stiller and then he looks at me and he's like I know you from somewhere and I'm like um co-host Geekly Squad he was like oh you're a comedian so I'm my mind is blown that's when I started to get a little like not cool yeah and I'm so excited to stay in there with Ben Stiller and jaylen brunson and i have this okay this is the one bad moment of the night for me that i haven't forgotten clearly it keeps repeating in my head there's always one i just like there was a kind of a moment where there was a silence and i was like this came out you know this came out nowhere i just go you always do something like this this is like i wouldn't even cross my mind to do something like this i already know what you're gonna say before you even said it my My grandpa played basketball coach in Brooklyn.

15:04Who did you say this to? Ben Stiller and Jalen Bretton. And what did they say? Were they like. Well, as I was saying it, you know, when you realize you don't have an ending to the story. And they were like listening. Like they were like, tell us the story. They were like, yeah. This is your one shot to become our friend. What do you want to say? no that was literally what was happening i go wait and as i'm saying it i'm like oh no no this is not going anywhere because you could tell immediately if someone's like oh that's that's a cool story and it wasn't so i was like but it was my grandpa from heaven telling me to say hi to them that's what was happening it came out like he needs to chill the fuck out grandpa he's involved in so many facets of our life i've never i didn't even meet the man he was on summer house i know but i never met him stop now i'm gonna get emotional it's only 8 22 a.m page i can't do this right now oh my god don't be emotional because you want to know what you are 35 years old and you still have a set of grandparents no one has that so i don't feel bad for you right now i can't with the two two scorpios this segment is brought to you in partnership with ziba one thing that really annoys me is fruit flies because once you see one you know you're about to see 500.

16:22It's kind of like a guy with a red flag. At first you're like he's having a bad day with the waiter and then you're like oh there's a lot more that came from. He's a monster. And we have a solution for this exact problem. As gigglers we know that we're women in STEM so I have this Zivo. So basically you plug it in and like the bugs just get attracted to it. You really don't realize how many bugs are hiding in your home. They're sneaky and then they just appear out of nowhere and that's my biggest pet peeve. You can't not have fruit platters. I know you love a fruit platter. I obviously love a fruit platter.

16:56I love to make them look stunning and gorgeous. What I don't anticipate is a bug on my fruit platter. No, that ruins everything. You lose trust from your guests. You lose friendships. And next thing you know, it's National Geographic. If you have a fly on your fruit platter, people immediately think you don't shower. If you have a fly on your fruit platter, you have to burn the whole house down. If you have a fly in your fruit platter, you have to literally go into witness protection. We are women in STEM because with blue and UV light, Zeevo lures, traps, and kills flying insects. I know you love Zeevo because it uses UV light and you love UV light.

17:32I believe in it. And it's so easy to plug the device in. Even I could do it. Zeevo is easy. You can just set it and forget it. Pest control that looks stylish and sleek inside your home. because dealing with fruit flies is a full-time job and that's where Zivo comes in as women in stem every 15 days we see if the trap is full and we pull out the cartridge with no mess and then swap for a refill it's so easy and bugs are out of sight out of mind my brother um just moved into a new house and it was actually my housewarming gift I said here catch some bugs it's so cute because I know you guys are putting prosciutto and melon everywhere and fruit flies love it they think it's theirs we have italian flies grab your zivo flying insects trap and refill at a major retailer near you to see how many red flags or bugs are in your home thank you zivo for supporting this segment zivo flying insect trap and refills are available at major retailers near you fruit flies be gone um okay so then i say i basically like my grandpa played i mean coach basketball brooklyn but you know there's nothing to this story like i literally was like but at least I got out early like I knew to get out early at least you acknowledge I was like this isn't going anywhere I just need to tell you guys that and I was like okay you're like just crazy but that was definitely I like you know when you feel it you're like that was not good that wasn't good yeah but then I turned to Ben and I'm like we have to recover and I was like I'm so excited for the documentary and he lights up he gets happy and I said you know I always say when your phone goes horizontal Ben Stiller's up to something and he starts laughing and then I'm like get out get out get out get out so i get out of the you said that's it sometimes no i'm out of control when i'm not around you i'm like who is that girl i don't want to blame anyone but chelsea handler is an enabler you turn into a 1940s like you know what i always say no i'm a dad with a waitress coming to the table like we gotta gotta go to online right now i love chelsea handler because she's literally me but we're dangerous together where she literally looked at me at one point and she's like if we say anything embarrassing we could just go to the other side of the room and they'll forget and i'm like perfect like because we're just yeah but we're good like we come in and we literally separated we're mingling mingling come back together she's like we're a good team and we're just blah blah blah blah i did say something also risky to jaylen but this was after like we'd been talking like the whole night we're having so much fun and we're sitting down and tiafa was losing and everyone's kind of feeling upset and i turned to jaylen and i'm just like can you give him like some words of advice or something and jaylen like kind of like smiles and i go do you know anything about like sports leadership that's and he like really started laughing and i but like it was risky and i had to do it after like we'd had some camaraderie um yeah and then i told russell wilson that we both played badgers played played for wisconsin together okay i feel like that's like you that's like a normal thing yeah and i also was like you don't remember me we got drug tested together but anyway then i met jojo i saw we're both 35 like the exact same age which is crazy because i'm like wait you blew up at like 12 i was obsessed with her she's another one like immediately three minutes in we were like talking about like just the deepest thing you can imagine she is such an angel when she became famous like when she had that like that what was the song that like it's just too little too late too little too yeah and i can she like made me want to grow up okay i looked at her i said look look at me i said look look at me i was like a hundred deuce in look at me you inspired so many girls to leave and get out and i can't quantify how valuable that is well i don't know because we were 12 and so we weren't running away from home like i'm not holding her hand anymore stop telling people we kissed we didn't wait is she married i think she has a man i don't know if she's married but her she she's like i didn't know if she was like married with kids or like i kind of want her to like a blow up right now me too also do you know who i'm obsessed with adela it's literally on my list to talk about things that are keeping the economy going is every time the girls get a goddamn anthem.

22:20Like, I don't think the guys even understand what it does for our insides. Speaking of, when we went to Michael Kors, I met the singer Ash who sings Stop the Wedding. What'd you say to her? We just locked eyes and I was like, I think that's her because she has like an iconic haircut and she had sunglasses on. she looks like a 1950s celebrity like she looks like someone that was born to be famous just by her like yeah like vibe and we just like went up to each other and we embraced each other like it was one of those moments where you're like i'm a girl you're a girl we agree on things that's hug and it was very emotional and i really enjoyed it it is hard to make eye contact with someone with sunglasses i've had a couple i thought they were making eye contact yeah the pull i felt like you kind of did with jordan across the so jordan woods was wearing sunglasses couldn't tell that she was making eye contact but took a risk they felt like you were but we were shout out jordan woods go next um by the way michael kors can we just say tell them about the new york times wait wait i'm literally that friend i'm like tell them the story tell the story we're like walking to our seats and we get like stopped by like these four people sitting like in a row who look really important yeah who looked like smart people like oh you guys are here for a reason yeah yeah and yeah like you're supposed to be here because you're like this is we're just like we're chatting like hey i'm in a turtleneck um

24:03like i think i said that at one point i was like and i'm in a turtleneck you know when in doubt just say what's happening yeah like at the giants game i'm like and taylor swift might perform here tomorrow you don't know because it can be a state and my grandpa played

24:22wait i just realized i make fun of you for things that i do because it's projection and that's what happens in a morning pod because she's she's just pure i'm clear she's clear headed we're walking and then someone oh three really important people were like hey we love you we they said something i've heard what they said they stop us oh my god we're huge fans we're like oh my god like we're huge fans like what do you do and they're like we're the new york times like i actually stopped for a moment because i was like and i didn't realize i say this because i don't realize when i do things i go i literally said to new york times i love your work Because you want to know what?

25:04Sometimes when I meet a girl on the street or like I'm in a room with people and they are taken seriously in their workplace, I get intimidated. I'm like, what is it like to be taken so seriously in your workplace? Because I'm a joke. Like my workplace is. And in terms of journalism, the smaller the font, the more important they are. And if you ever tried to read a New York Times article, you got to squint. wait can i say this was not even on my list but go for it since you brought up the new york times um i don't understand how everyone's playing the new york times games every day like you know like you're like oh i'll do the wordle every day or like i'll do the what guys am i really dumb because i'm not getting the word i'm never wait listen to me i'm never getting the word okay I tried to play one of them the other day and it was like here's all these letters and you pick out how many words are in there and I'm like no no then then I've been personally attacked this week then I'm at the Chanel event and I'm getting interviewed by like I want to say it was like Harper's Bazaar and it was a man and he goes spell mademoiselle no no no no that's illegal I looked at him I said you don't ask a lady to do that but I'm quick on my goddamn feet and there was a sign behind me that had it written so I glanced and I read it that's how you pass college and that's how I pass Spanish like literally do not put me on the spot like that I'm really sorry that happened to you no so I was like thrown off I'm trying to have a nice night go to my first Chanel event and then this man asks me to spell and I'm like look at it be like put together an outfit I said I'm wearing a vintage jean you want me to sweat right now by the way shout out to your vintage jean I didn't realize the detail thank you the side detail of the Chanel on it like that was iconic Paige I need help with my outfits for September it's so hard to dress because I'm like I need a jacket I need layers but then I'm like it's also hot out still What do you do?

27:24I know. September really makes me want to just like get rid of all my clothes and buy all new things. Like I'm not going back to school, but for some reason I need a back to school wardrobe. Yeah. And it's like new year, new me. And I need to figure it out. But it's stressful. But Revolve. I have gone to Revolve and it solved all my problems. It's where I go when I want that reset without turning it into a six hour research project. I don't have the time. And they already have all the brands that I love. Everything feels current because apparently the temperature dropping four degrees means I need a new identity and a sweater.

27:56I'm obsessed with my Beryl Ago jeans. They're incredible and I wore it with a nice Helsa blazer and some cute silver earrings. I felt so hot, confident and like she knows what she's doing. If you're looking at your closet right now thinking, no, none of this is working. Just go to Revolve. They have all the brands you actually want. there's always something new and you can order a few options because the shipping is fast and the returns are easy go to revolve.com slash giggly to shop our faves and use code giggly for 15 % off your first order that's revolve.com slash giggly code giggly for 15 % off your first order offer ends september 29th so don't miss out can i get into fashion week or did you have anything that you wanted to round out um i clap wordly do you realize that and renee stubs got a video of me chewing that um i saw that i liked your side part oh my god it was a risk i didn't feel fully comfortable the entire night like you know when you don't know if you're pulling it off or not all night like you look you look in the mirror and you're like no i'm killing it and then i see it again and i'm like she's a joke like everyone's laughing at you and then i look and i'm like no she's this has never been done before and then i'm like you need to go home you're fucking embarrassing that's how i felt with this i are you are you petting kitty right now yeah i am how'd you but it looks like you're petting your pillow of kitty i'm petting the real thing so yeah i was chewing like you know those really thick potato chips like they're like homemade potato chips yeah yeah yeah yeah and i'm i'm not like a good chewer like i'm gulping shit like i i'll just shove it in like a snake eating a rat but i guess at the time i was trying to she said sorry it's 8 33 that was crazy it is crazy how snakes eat whole rats i mean it's open up the jaw but as you know i can't open my jaw up right now it was funny because i was thinking like i was serving cunt in my side part but then i you can't when you're like chewing the entire time like take a breath babe but maybe that's the new like ai baseball girl in the crowd she's just chewing well i was like what is she eating that it's taking that long no it's those what are those chips called like it's like the like new england chips that are like they break into a trillion pieces too in your mouth and you have to like find them um tell me about fashion week I go to the coast show which are my favorite t-shirt first of all when they invited me I'd never been to their show before and I was like wait I'm actually genuinely very excited for the show because I I just love their stuff they have like really good basic stuff I love their t-shirts actually that was the t-shirt I was wearing on Morgan Stewart so I go for a fitting and to like pick out my outfit for what I'm gonna wear to it and I'm like looking through all the stuff josephine spots this like men's shirt that has like a matching tie and like a pop of purple was like their whole theme for the collection oh i didn't even know that so i pick out like my shirt i add like a jacket i'm like let me see some accessories they had this hat i was like uh yes i'm getting the hat i was between doing a purple glove and a purple sock that's what i was picking between and then i ultimately went with the purple sock I get to the show I am sitting down Jenna Lyons is sitting next to me Jessel from Real Housewives comes We're kiki-ing C.

31:36Roos is there I'm like oh like my friend Like this is actually I'm having a good time Like it's Sunday Me and Josephine just took pictures I have no stress I'm going to the I'm going to the Giants game When I get home It's the perfect day Yeah I'm just having like a fun day Nothing's coming in my way so show starts okay we're maybe maybe a minute 30 into the show not even and this woman starts walking down the runway she's holding a sign and i'm like oh my god i've never seen a protester at a fashion show in real life like i've only ever seen this on tv or like in a movie she's holding a sign up i'm like yeah you can't read you're like give her a second no because Because New York Fashion Week banned fur.

32:26Like, even if you sell real fur in your collection that you're showing at New York Fashion Week, you can't have real fur. So, like, I have never. And I don't know when that happened. Yeah. I mean, I think it was a couple years ago. Peter put the foot down. She's walking down. She has the sign. And security immediately comes, grabs her, pulls her away. Okay. I'm like, oh, one off. Truly 30 seconds later, you hear this other guy yelling, like really yelling, like a real commotion. He has no sign. He's walking down the runway. And I mean, he's walking down like with a mission. And sorry, I'm just envisioning you in your little hat.

33:12No, literally, I'm like sitting there. I'm like, I'm wearing a fucking purple sock. Are you guys kidding? are you kidding right now so he goes i don't know what i don't know how who where they where he went i'm sitting next to this gorgeous gorgeous girl jenna lions is to my right gorgeous girl to my left i can feel that she's like she's like sitting up in her seat like when the people are coming down and so like i look at her and i'm like crazy right and she's like no like i'm actually like kind of nervous and I go oh my god don't be nervous now I'm like her protector don't be yeah I'm like don't be nervous there's so much security guard and there's an exit door right there like right over there and I like point to it I'm like we'll just run I could tell she was very nice but she goes she goes to me she goes to me okay but I'm a model and so I think I'm more nervous

34:14and i look at her and i go ugly people should be brave i agree wait also you are the og child model you're a model i'm like i should be braver it's happened to her before when she's been on the runway and it's like scary i'm sure it's way scarier when you're on the runway i don't i guess they're told what to do in an emergency situation but it's always different when you're like experiencing it so then shows over and i'm like oh my god that was crazy it felt very 90s like and i thought nothing of it i'm like another new york day speak your truth yeah another new york day like i don't what okay so i leave i go home i'm then i'm starting to see like the instagrams a whole separate thing happened in like a different section okay there were two other protesters that like i don't i didn't even see one of them like it he never even rounded my corner the one day i'm like you don't need a beta blocker the one day you don't take a beta blocker maybe thank god i didn't because i was like alert and ready i was ready to put this model on my back and run to an exit sorry i'm like nervous my computer's gonna to die but anyway so that was sunday fashion week but we had so much fun i guess it was friday we went to wetherhoft and course oh yes we went to wetherhoft um i love when our outfits are so opposite we're just like in our prime it's my favorite thing wetherhoft was a like real performance it was really artsy no it was so artsy i loved it i felt like i was in like a new york city like nyu like class that i was like he's a genius like i felt so fucking artsy and afterward i was gonna ask you what you thought the meaning of it was and i'm like i'm not gonna deal with have her i'm not gonna do that to her yeah i have no fucking idea what he's trying to explain there i was like and where'd the baby come from and that was the beauty of it it leaves you questioning whose head is this supposed to be right in the middle i love that it was like a theater though wait so then i'm at the giants game and like back to sports thank god every time i go somewhere where like it's not my thing like i try and figure out like okay what in this moment am i like can I be similar to like where can I find the commonality in what I'm doing with my personality and then I'm sitting there and I'm like wait a minute I am a giant I love New York City I represent New York City New York City is the truly the best city if you are thinking if you're a girl and you're thinking about moving to New York City at any age, fucking do it.

37:22If you're in your 20s and you're thinking about New York City, it is the best experience you could ever experience. The saying is absolutely true. If you can make it in New York, you can make it anywhere. And if you haven't made it in New York, have you even made it? When a tree falls and no one hears it, did it even fall? You love shoulder pads. I love. Then I thought, but my soul and my heart is in New Jersey. I was about to call you out on that, and that's why you're a giant, because they're in New Jersey. I'm a giant. Did you enjoy the game? Okay, I did enjoy the game. I ate a hot dog. My brother really enjoyed the game, and that was the whole reason that I went.

38:09Yes, they did. Do you know I've never gone to a game? I've never gone to a professional game where whatever team I wanted to win didn't win. Oh, yeah. You just thought that sports. I'm a witch. You watch the home team win and you go home. Yeah, so don't piss me off. I love that. I also do have to announce I have started my fantasy league. How's that going? Wait, this is so funny. taylor donahue taylor strecker's wife who's on house of stassi is runs the league and we've been doing this league for years now what's your team name oh my god it's from like when i was like 23 it's i don't even know like it's not good it's something stupid why can't you change i think i should be able to i need to rebrand for sure my fantasy league this is because you're not involved yeah i mean what's the color what's the theme you know are we getting together are we having chicken wings or what are we doing we do this like crazy zoom draft which is really funny but we're at the zoom draft and some guy pops up and i watched house of stassi and i go that's rob from house of stassi and rob's whole storyline was he stopped talking to beau because of a fantasy football drama and i go wait a second you go i love when life imitates art rob's been on the team for years i just didn't know who like rob was so then i'm like just a couple reality tv people hanging out um i'm approaching this fantasy year mature did i lose to andrew colin yesterday yes am i processing that for the rest of the week and it's gonna like hurt everything i do throughout the week because deep down i'm disappointed in myself and don't believe i should experience joy because i'm so embarrassed yes but i am taking this on as like it's it's luck and it doesn't define who i am as a person totally which brings me to a life update i finally after two or three years of fucking around got invisalign yesterday again now you know me with doctors i get there no one's saying anything they just throw that thing in your mouth where suddenly you're like lodged open like yeah like a crocodile so i'm like even if i was gonna ask a question about what's about to happen to me like they couldn't hear me and then for the next hour it's just at one point this never happened before they took a thing that like vibrates to like separate your teeth yeah that was i had no idea what was going on great yeah that's a great have you ever had the sandpaper thing like what they were doing and then it would vibrate yeah they just like oh i hate they like sandpaper your teeth down to like make space i like a doctor that's like okay we're about to like just tell me yeah because you know in the doctor's office like you envision it's the worst thing ever like i'm like this is a chainsaw it feels like a chainsaw i like to be blind i know but then i envision the worst like i'm like how big is this sandpaper chainsaw that you're putting to my gum right now see if you didn't know that it was a sandpaper chainsaw you wouldn't even know it had a size long story short i was kind of freaking out but then they like do it all they also like my lips bleeding like they're my mouth cannot expand and also i think my massagers were like shaking at one point because they're like we can't handle this right now like i was it was so they're like uh i don't know if you know but we've been numb for six months you're like good morning they finally pull it out and then she tells me like okay you're back on your invisalign and she tells me and you know i can't emotionally handle this right now she goes and these are rubber bands for what i go but i haven't had rubber bands since i was 14 getting braces and i got like neon yellow and i thought i was the shit what would you need rubber bands for i guess my overbite but like it's not easy to put the rubber bands in and i literally walked out of that place and i was like i can't emotionally handle rubber bands right now and again of course there's like dentist gigglers always in my dms because the gigglers are geniuses so i just go to one of the dms and i'm like hey hey patient here because also the first time i did invisalign i didn't have rubber bands did my mouth like get way worse like i don't know what maybe they're trying to do it like really fast or something i don't know but i want to be like baby we're lucky i'm here right now how long do you have to wear the rubber bands i already i think popped one of the things on the side and i can't do the rubber band on one side wait hannah no you're not i'm not doing rubber bands also what's with gen z like getting braces and then like keeping them on what the fuck are you doing no truly like what the hell is this maybe it's like an insurance thing no i think they're like trying to be like quirky and weird and it's like an accessory thing there it's weird i did invisalign i was great at it and then i went on tour for like the fourth time and i just couldn't get it together so now i have to start from scratch scratch it's going to take 20 weeks and that's supposed to be with my rubber bands i'm not wearing my rubber bands so i'm not going on this journey with you okay I respect and I honestly respect your boundaries I respect that you're like and that's where I'm gonna have to put a wedge in between our friendship no I mean I haven't heard of a rubber band in someone's mouth in 15 years how I get to a coffee shop with my husband after this and he looks at me and he's like what what's going on over here and I order obviously like a bacon egg cheese croissant and i'm trying to take it out i don't know if i take the rubber bands out first or like with it i start taking out with the rubber band the rubber band flings across hits him in the chest no it's actually a hazard also i think i swallowed a rubber band hannah you get that in in des's eye he's done that's it he's wearing a patch now for the rest of your marriage he he's in a patch also like i i can barely i have long nails how am i like doing surgical the fact they thought i was gonna put two rubber bands on who would you go to is this like a new dentist had you ever been to them before it's my fault like it's my fault but i have too much faith sorry even trying to support a small business do you want to know what it is you you're so genuine and trusting of people that when they say hey this is my job this was what i do you say good yeah who would lie to me why would you lie to me good do i hope you do your job well and then you get in there why do you have a business if you can't do your job oh my god i'm back on my invisalign it really hurts okay um i took it out for the pod because i have respect for the fucking community yeah thank you that would have been i i actually emotionally wouldn't have been able to handle that today if you showed up with rubber bands in your mouth i actually would have freaked the fuck out like they're literally they're like hanging here like no i would have fucking also like i'm not trying to brag my teeth aren't that bad like i almost looked at the doctor i'm like they're not like they're like yeah i have an overbite but like yeah but invisalign is like hey we're just gonna like straighten a couple real quick like also they were trying to put it on my front two teeth and i was like guys like page will actually like she'll cancel the pod i was gonna say this is like one thing that i wanted to bring to your attention and i also wanted to ask the gigglers a question obviously i'm like so against running like i'm not running no like no i'm on tiktok and i see this this guy made this video about like uh what are those what are those marathons that aren't running they're like tough tough mutters yeah like those it was like he was making a video about one of those and there was a girl at one of them who had shitter pants and all the comments were like i would never keep going with the race like that's like whatever and i was like wait this is such an interesting niche i love that you got on tough mutter tiktok yeah that i would never be involved in show me your culture what do you mean you're shitting You literally were like, show me your culture.

46:43By the way, this, during college, Tough Mudders were like the cool thing to do. Like, oh, I have a Tough Mudder on Friday. I'm like putting my glasses on. Yeah, I'm like, I'm trying to learn more about it. Then I think, I have a thought, and I Google, how many people at the New York City Marathon are shitting their fucking pants? Because that's disgusting. That alone, I'm not going. I'm not signing up. in funny situations that will then be a great story. I didn't realize, then Google was like, oh, well, it's not like actually recorded how many people are shitting their... Sorry, I don't have the exact data.

47:29But it said like, honey, it's like 12%. There's thousands of people at the New York City Marathon that are shitting themselves. And no one's talking about it. Well, especially if you just had a cough and you're like, let's go. Well, because they're either stopping the race, going in somewhere, shitting, or they're just shitting in their pants. And I'm out. And I'm out. You see, I would be that girl. I know. And that's actually specifically why I'm out. The second you said I'm out, I was like, I'm in. Because there's something so beautiful about chasing your dream against all odds. and there's something so beautiful about taking a shit in a porcelain bowl and then sitting your ass on a bidet to get extra fucking clean there's something beautiful about that yeah well yeah don't actually and don't let hannah fool you because she has a heated toilet seat that actually changed my life recently i can't i come out of the bathroom hannah goes sorry i had the toilet seat i think a little too high what do you think okay so i got my first heated toilet toilet seat toto shout out toto um i don't know how it works and it's on like a hundred degrees and it feels nice but like i don't i don't want to cook my ovaries longer than two minutes though that's a big tail it actually felt good on my lower my lower spine but also anyway i digress i am i have someone with a nervous stomach the amount of times like i have a distinct memory of being like 16 years old and getting invited to you get invited to train with like certain special coaches and if you're good enough the coach is like she can join this academy whatever and it was in new york city i remember my dad and i ate ate something before after school and then he drove me like two hours to this academy upstate or something and we get there and my stomach's like not doing well so i'm like hey can i go to the bathroom when i tell you i was in the bathroom for the full two hours of the practice and the coach kept being like hey where's hannah and my dad's like i don't know but i was like couldn't stop shitting myself so i missed the entire practice oh my god you've been having a bowel move like problems for you from a young age but at least i was like couth enough to be like i'm gonna stay here i'm not gonna gallivant around with diarrhea yeah yeah yeah because that's and i said we're gonna have to rain check because mama has a stomach ache and i had a weird sushi like i'm not a baby in a diaper i'm not shitting and going on with my day like the adrenaline you feel like right before we walk on stage or when we're on stage you know that's how people feel doing a tough mutter so like okay but if i every time i walk down stage i shit myself i actually would take get a different profession i could definitely see myself shitting myself and then being like it's a really good story to tell the gigglers and keep going it's also the sports culture of like the more adversity you do and survive it's like you're more of a champion so like sometimes they're leaning into it i disagree a period period Period, iconic.

50:49Period, different. Periods are iconic. Period, different because it doesn't smell. And it's not like, it's not something your body is like rejecting. You're full of mud at the Tough Mudder. Hannah, I'm not getting a fucking disease because the bitch next to me shit herself and then touched something else. No, get the fuck out of here and go take care of that. like it's inappropriate i think i do if it happened to me i would run to the bathroom but like you're on the clock so you can't do like a full cleanup but i'd try to do the best i could okay and have you heard of the burnt toast theory god actually decided it's not your turn to win this race i could see you using the burnt toast theory way too often being like oh it's windy out that's burnt toast theory i'm like here's the thing i am in fact an hour late but has anyone here in this important meeting heard of the burnt toast theory wait before we go i just have to say one thing did you watch secret lives of my own wives how could you bring this up by 55 minutes in how could you do this to me question mark because you want to know what we're gonna get into next episode next pod but i'm just gonna say one thing because i watched it on my phone like i was on my phone watching i'm an episode and a half in okay cool i'm like three episodes in pretty much but like they have to stop wearing sweatpants i can't take the sweats anymore oh that's out of the that's okay that's what you took from okay that when you say they are you talking about we'll get into all of them the whole cast nope whole cast all of them the whole cast but they're mothers they literally have like they they just had a baby you want to put them on a jean here's the thing don't also how dare you bring in new mothers to this how dare you try and trap me how dare you try and trap me with a new mom babe they all they're mormon all they're doing is popping out kids like i'm surprised they okay i get that and i'm fine with the amount of children that they're having but i'm watching you on a television show i can't watch for this 800th season in a row everyone in gray sweats i can't get throw one fit they don't even have an event ever that they do like where everyone's in a long dress like send them some daphne maybe this is a me problem that i'm like because i'm so obsessed with like what everyone's wearing i can't i physically can't watch the show anymore because i'm like i can't watch these outfits i can't do it's so funny to watch like through your lens that's what you took from that well i took other things but i'll get into it i'm gonna say taylor frankie paul one thing about her she will show up looking like she just woke up regardless of the time and as a girl of that font yeah just in that not in the one thing about me you know i'm not texting my exes no that's for sure why did was there like no promo for the season was it because it was just like so crazy cancel the show show's done show's over it went it was too hot too hard yep they went too hard too fast they got too big too big they got too mean to each other Show's done.

54:22Overexposed. And I want to get into it on the next pod, but I'm really confused because Hulu is Disney. Disney is ABC. ABC is The Bachelor. Hulu is Mormon what? I'm not understanding. Do you think Hulu was like, she made a mockery of The Bachelor. it's more interesting to show that she was like not taking it seriously and let's just show let's put all that good content into i think them saying that like the video is why they didn't air the season is not true like i don't get it i'm like wait you're all the same company what are you talking all i know is someone at abc was like we're just gonna eat the millions of dollars that cost yeah i don't get i don't get it like okay but she's not supposed to be seen spotted with anyone but then she's sneaking in a boy like a guy into her hotel room it's like okay but you're the company that can't spot her so like i don't get how you're arranging his flight it's a spider-man meme then i'm like at this point just give us the bachelorette season and get Dakota so far from me before I explode thank you guys so much for giggling with us that was one of my favorite endings you've ever done um thank you for getting with us we're so excited for a beautiful week and if anyone sees my rubber bands let me know where they are because I already lost them and we'll talk to you later love you bye

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