Giggling about pranks, perfectionism, and dance anxiety

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0:46Hannah Berner: Pick up the new Hershey's Creme Bars and Salted Caramel or Affogato wherever you shop for snacks and choose happiness with every bite. what's up gigglers carry fix the wi-fi manifest that shit we can't be managed

1:05i mean the day just got away from me what's up my galloping gigglers that's a good one we've been

1:13Hannah Berner: really horse themed recently i'm not sure why you created a lot of backlash because everyone was

1:19Paige DeSorbo: Like, we have a horse team in Texas. It's called the Mavericks, you dumb bitch.

1:24Hannah Berner: You can't just say that to me. Like, you've created a lot of backlash. Like, that will put me into a literal spiral.

1:31Paige DeSorbo: That's the kind of backlash I love to have.

1:33Hannah Berner: Like, oh, my God.

1:35Paige DeSorbo: I wouldn't let Paige start the pod because I'm trying to put together the perfect text message. That's a name drop. To Maria Sharpova. And obviously everything, it's either like way too lovey-dovey or like not giving it the justice it deserves.

1:51Hannah Berner: How old is she? Is she our age?

1:53Paige DeSorbo: This is the thing. She raised me, but she's only like three years older than me because she won Wimbledon at 17.

2:00Hannah Berner: Is she the youngest woman to win?

2:02Paige DeSorbo: There were younger, like 15, 16 year olds. There was a time where girls were winning like pretty young. But she came in and beat Serena Williams in the final Wimbledon at 17 years old. and everyone's like a star is born it was Lady Gaga how old was Serena Williams at the time I think in her 20s but like it was her prime so everyone was like oh Serena has got this girl no yeah I'm like sorry I'm so processing yesterday but let's before we get into it I'm just trying to

2:30Hannah Berner: think like wait what's the greatest thing I ever did at 17 and I think it was like that was the

2:36Paige DeSorbo: year that everyone was like Paige can do hair like you could do other people's hair yeah but I really

2:42Hannah Berner: couldn't but for whatever reason I was on the prom circuit oh so you just had good PR you weren't actually it was all smoke and mirrors you got lucky once and then you like it ran like wildfire I had phenomenal PR in high school if I could bring back my PR from high school into now I was mysterious no one really knew does she drink we don't know

3:06Paige DeSorbo: does she have a boyfriend she's very candid what was the hair your go-to hairstyle like when a girl came up to you it was like I need my hair done you were like this is the page look okay I'm

3:15Hannah Berner: not kidding I straight up was a consultant in at like my senior year of high school girls would come to my locker be like this is the dress what are the shoes accessories and the hair and I'd be like you're smoking a cigarette you're like okay pulled to the side cascading are you following me I'm like not a necklace that will be detrimental to your well-being it's an earring it's a larger earring it's a bracelet and a shoe we don't see the shoe it's a clear loose like i would go off

3:44Paige DeSorbo: i think you need to consult with my sister ma genie because lois she's taking it next level she refused to wear her soccer jersey because she said it was too big and ugly well been there done that i quit i quit t-ball okay i said mom what the hell is this i said no i'm not going lois is me I am Lois well you want to know what is funny I got tagged I kept getting tagged in this

4:14Hannah Berner: Instagram like real so like finally I'm watching it and it's this mom being like my daughter's going to her first day of kindergarten and I'm freaking out because she picked out an outfit and I'm scared that the teachers are gonna be like you're a bad mom basically so I'm like watching this video watching this I'm like waiting for the outfit I'm like it's gonna be something crazy like a bathing suit and all this stuff. I see the outfit. I go, honey, you should take notes from your daughter. That is the perfect first day outfit I've ever seen. It's called editorial. I go, it's giving classy, it's giving professional, but it's giving whimsy.

4:49Hannah Berner: It's giving I can move. I'm like, I think your daughter's worried about you, babe. I think she's worried how you're going to show up to bring her on her first day. now when I was a child I didn't have that angst because my mom like she would walk in as like a chaperone for like a field trip and I would be like you other bitches could never like juice I would literally look at other girls and be like do you see your mom look at my mom we're not the same here she's wearing high heels to the apple orchard we aren't the same we aren't the same I'll never forget that bitch's apple orchard outfit I couldn't believe she showed up in it it was perfect

5:31Paige DeSorbo: I can't believe we're friends because I literally like two years ago, I started being like, oh, I should put an outfit together.

5:41Hannah Berner: It's been my whole life. I quit cheerleading my senior year because I wanted to put outfits together for the Friday night football games. I literally go, I can't be a cheerleader anymore. I have to be creative.

5:53Paige DeSorbo: No, you've missed very important Zoom meetings because you're planning your outfits for the week.

5:57Hannah Berner: I'm like, if it wasn't on my schedule, I can't just jump to it.

6:03Paige DeSorbo: Oh, my God. Wait. So when did you fly to Venice? Okay. What day is it? It's Monday. Because I know you had to leave yesterday, but, like, it all gets confusing. You know we get thrown when Paige was overseas.

6:16Hannah Berner: I flew Sunday night. My flight was at 9 p.m. I flew 9 p.m., landed here Monday morning. but really it was like 11 a.m here but it was like 5 a.m your time I couldn't sleep on the flight at all and that is so not me so when I was landing I started like having a panic attack that I didn't have like sleep deprivation and I'm gonna like pass out and I'm like it's gonna be so hot and then like I have to take a boat transfer and like what if I get nauseous honestly I'm so dramatic no but everyone talks about i'm going to europe i'm going to europe and i'm like it's stressful no my body really does need to acclimate here's the thing about venice and i've only been here for a couple hours and most of it in my room because i fell asleep they're not kidding that you take a boat everywhere i thought it was a bit i thought it was a full i thought it was like optional boat and then like you could like you can walk around i thought the gondola was like Times Square like you can see Elmo if you want to I thought it was optional okay no cars there's no cars wait did you have to have to paddle no like you just get like this little like cigarette boat there's literally spot it looks like bus stops but it's for boats it's the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life it's that I've never been here before I am I feel like I'm in a movie it's quite literally the prettiest place i've ever been obviously i've been to capri a bunch this is a different type of beauty like capri feels very vacation this is like italy yeah this is

7:56Paige DeSorbo: like oh my god my ancestors i was gonna say now you're with your people i do love that you go to the same vacation every year because it's like no drama you know what's going on but i'm like

8:05Hannah Berner: let's see some culture let's see some things my dad would be dying he'd be like but capri's right

8:10Paige DeSorbo: over there why don't we just go also this hotel room the wooden planks on the like it's already

8:16Hannah Berner: the aesthetic i'm vibing with it wait i want to like give you i want to like give you a tour the audio people love this the bathrooms in there and then like back there is like the toilet i'm gonna be honest the way they set it up the feng shui not the smartest italians don't do feng shui no italians don't do that the bathroom is bigger than like the bedroom part which i'm like

8:41Paige DeSorbo: honestly fine you could have used that the last economy vacation yeah i could have used this

8:46Hannah Berner: massive tub that there's two tubs in there it's venice is a very it feels very honeymoon-ish oh the only thing is it's you're not swimming in that water like i was like oh do people jump in this and they were like no that's disgusting you don't swim in the venice water so i feel like it's not like I don't consider that it to be a vacation if I'm not putting my bathing suit on and getting going in water anytime people are like oh I'm going on a ski vacation I'm going I'm like no you're going on a ski work trip that's a work trip all this shit you got to pack and put on

9:24Paige DeSorbo: that's work talk about accessories don't get me started we do not we haven't skied because does tour's ACL because I prayed for it um and here we are you want to know what we probably

9:36Hannah Berner: never will again because now we're with two men that have zero interest in it they both have new problems yeah if we want to go on a ski vacation would have to be just the two of us i think it

9:47Paige DeSorbo: would be like we book a show in aspen and end up being there for like three days and we shop one of the days and one of the days we like drink hot chocolate done glad we wrapped that up glad we figured that out i can't believe you're in fucking italy right now i'm so i'm like i can't believe it but um i was gallivanting all weekend where i i feel like i saw that i didn't check your

10:12Hannah Berner: location but i saw your instagram story and you were glam and you were here and you were there

10:16Paige DeSorbo: no i was you guys this is my my gala the us open you know that and this was my weekend i did a lululemon party um and then after the party i went to another party who does that you know what's crazy about

10:29Hannah Berner: friends you're my you're this it's a pyramid right it's definitely oh and at the top did you ever watch dance moms actually you know i've never watched an episode of dance moms wow that was

10:42Paige DeSorbo: really bratty you gotta it's some of the best reality tv you gotta um you're at the top of the pyramid you trickle down everyone knows about you everyone talks about you when anyone asks anything They have to consider you involved. Anything anyone tells me will be told to you. Anyway.

11:01Hannah Berner: To some people, I'm an imaginary friend. They've never seen me. They've just heard about me.

11:05Paige DeSorbo: But you feel your presence always next to me. Yes.

11:07Hannah Berner: Like, it's like a ghost.

11:09Paige DeSorbo: Sometimes people will just talk to you when they're with me. They're like, can you tell Paige? And I'm like, or they'll just ask me about you, and I'm just like. You're a vessel to me. I'm a literal vessel. I'm a spiritual vessel. But then I have these, like, I have my comedy friends. who like have saved my life like comedy friends when I'm with them you know when you just feel like oh these are my people like they make fun of everything can I give you a compliment yeah

11:37Hannah Berner: you pick great friends how many bad people have I introduced you to some of the worst people you've ever met I've introduced you you have you always find genuine nice women do you know my mom

11:56Paige DeSorbo: Early on, I remember middle school, I was like complaining about something and she was like, what if you hung out with people who liked you? And I was like, that's heavy. I'm seven years old. That's heavy for the fifth grade. Yeah, that's heavy. I'm like, well, they just don't like me because they don't know me yet and they haven't seen the sides of me. Thank you. That's such a nice thing to say. I do think I'm definitely quality over quantity. And also I am better one on one. I'm not that great in a group setting.

12:25Hannah Berner: Yeah, I just feel like anyone you've introduced me to, I've genuinely been like, whether or not like I've kept a friendship with them or not, I've genuinely been like, that's a really good person. A great example is Haley. Haley's a perfect example of someone where I'm just like, that's probably one of the nicest people I've ever met in my life.

12:47Paige DeSorbo: that's a little angel it's just the friends you keep around you like their energy i don't know if this is the right word but it like bleeds onto you and like i cannot have like dirty fake weird vibes yeah close to me at all it's like i'm just like really sensitive yeah where like i'm like

13:06Hannah Berner: you can handle more than me because you could disassociate i think she's a sociopath let's find out i'm like do you think she'll skin me and wear me and then date my boyfriend let's see let's hang out with her for a year just to get to the bottom of it i love a fun crazy girlfriend

13:26Paige DeSorbo: to live vicariously through but a lot of them i don't care what they do i like when their heart their heart is there totally and then i met the comedy friends and i was like oh these are my people like this is they are joking about everything they're able to be self-aware and laugh at themselves I'm like I love this but then I forget like I have so many friendships from the tennis world that like I just haven't rekindled because I haven't seen and after this little lemon party there was this other party called the racket mag party the team bug party party and I was with um Ayan who is Frances Tiafoe's girlfriend who like played tennis for UCLA Madison Appel shout out who um was number one for Indiana like I'm just with like the most badass tennis girls ever and I'm like it's so funny how you you have different identities and like in that moment I was like tennis Hannah again I was like we're just some athletes hanging out we're just we're just athletes some former division one athletes who have make it their

14:29Hannah Berner: whole personality i feel like society kind of teaches you you have one friend group and that's your friend group and if you don't stay friends with them for the rest of your life you're kind of a bad person because they've known you when in reality i think it's so much nicer to have different friends also in your 30s it's so different having friends than in your 20s it's

14:50Paige DeSorbo: like for sure complete different life but it's also funny how many people from the beginning like come back around because they were that girl like the people who are meant to stick around well you don't have to force friendships with people from when you were little right what's crazy with tennis though is like we weren't friends we actually fucking hated each other right like imagine you it's similar to you with like all the other models that you'd see in your child modeling how you were like I'm trying to put it in your perspective I was gonna say like when I see

15:28Hannah Berner: people from other reality shows that I have nothing to do with I feel like we already have

15:33Paige DeSorbo: a connection because we both did a reality show yes but back then like I would see all these girls names on the draw and they were it was just like they were standing between me and like my dreams right oh okay I literally had to fight them for a spot yeah the girl that beat me out

15:49Hannah Berner: for the Barbie commercial who then got her own show on Nickelodeon yeah yeah think about like

15:53Paige DeSorbo: a ton of Victoria Justices in the room and there were some that I got along with really well but it was still like looked down upon to like be good friends with girls it was almost like you were weak like you weren't tough and you weren't scary yeah you had to walk in and everyone needed to be scared of you and you know that's not my vibe so if you were at a tournament and it was

16:13Hannah Berner: like you you would you go into like a girl's locker room you would love the vibe of a tournament

16:20Paige DeSorbo: everyone has their own outfit like you get to wear whatever you want and you walk in and you're with like your dad or your coach and you just wait around for your name to be called and then you and the girl don't say a word to each other get the balls and go on the court and battle it out

16:34Hannah Berner: so where are you prior to the court waiting you're just like in a tennis club so like you're

16:40Paige DeSorbo: all just like got it not talking to each other in the tennis club waiting and like you're warming up sometimes you intimidate people by like doing some crazy warm-up was there ever like fights

16:49Hannah Berner: in terms of outfits or like she always wears her hair like well there would be like every now and

16:56Paige DeSorbo: then a girl would like get sponsored by nike so like the girls that got sponsored by nike or adidas like one day they'd walk in like wearing the outfit that like maria sharpova just wore at the u.s open and you were like oh she's that girl oh okay because she got attention from brands yeah wow okay okay so like she was wearing all the best stuff where sometimes you know me i'd be showing up to these tournaments wild with a sophie short and like a ripped shirt

17:24Hannah Berner: are there any rules on things you can't wear i don't believe not wear a baggy t-shirt

17:31Paige DeSorbo: I don't believe so. There's some rules like in tournaments where like you can't wear logos that are too big. In Wimbledon, you have to wear white. But like. Wimbledon, you have to wear all white. You knew that.

17:42Hannah Berner: I didn't. You knew that. Maybe I knew that and it was deep in my brain. But I love that.

17:47Paige DeSorbo: I think that's why you first fell in love with the sport and you forgot how you first fell in love with it.

17:51Hannah Berner: Well, no, I think I first fell in love that I realized it was all grass. Like it was all greenery. One thing about me, I love a plant. I love oxygen. I go, it's giving wedding aesthetic. I love. It's giving the background of a brunch wedding. Has anyone ever gotten married at Wimbledon?

18:09Paige DeSorbo: That's a really good question. It's also very, you like it because it's like impossible to become a member of the Wimbledon tennis club. Like you have to win Wimbledon to be like invited or you have to be like your dad had to like invent London. Toaster strudels. You like the exclusivity of it. Yeah. So anyway, long story short, I walk into Rock and Mag party. And you know me. The second I walk to a party, I'm like, we got to get out of here. Yeah. But immediately I see some kid, Guy Gary, who I literally trained with in Brooklyn. And he's just like, Hannah. I'm like, Gary? Shout out, Gary. I see this guy, Kahari, who played on the Beacon boys tennis team with me, runs up to me, gives me a bear hug.

18:50Paige DeSorbo: And immediately I'm like a kid again, just like a tennis player. Like I cry talking about it. and I'm just seeing all these faces then I'm seeing these girls who like I they're tennis influencers now who I follow and I'm like I know you played for UCLA like this girl Chanel and I'm like I've always like looked up to you and she's like I saw your name in the draws too like it's so cool what you're up to and I'm like junior tennis was crazy right we just like had this like out of cult moment where I was like I know that we never talked to each other before but like yeah I love you. Like, I'm so proud of you.

19:25Paige DeSorbo: Like, I'm so proud of these girls.

19:27Hannah Berner: Once, like, you have children and then you, like, run into someone from high school in the grocery store, it's, like, that vibe. Yeah. It's like, oh, my God, where'd your life go? Congrats.

19:38Paige DeSorbo: No, I was so proud of everyone. But it was just so cool to feel community in, like, different places. Because there was a moment where it was just the gigglers. That's all I had. Yeah. That's all I was.

19:49Hannah Berner: And that's, honestly, that's all I actually want. that's all i need i actually don't want any outside groups coming in the next day i drove

19:59Paige DeSorbo: to dc and by drove i mean got driven aiden and des drove me to dc for a wedding my first wedding

20:07Hannah Berner: of the summer i didn't know you had a wedding this past weekend i know i was and then we drove

20:12Paige DeSorbo: back that night oh i know it was a lot but a giggler came up to me she was like hey what are

20:18Hannah Berner: you doing here it's actually is funny when you see gigglers out in the wild doing like the most

20:22Paige DeSorbo: mundane thing no she was like what are you doing at this random family wedding right now in washington

20:27Hannah Berner: dc that's nice though that des doesn't drink so he could drive home i do have to say shout out to

20:32Paige DeSorbo: des and aiden you know what they did what aiden put on dolly parton the whole ride and he's like obsessed with dolly parton just like saying dolly parton and talked about how amazing she is the whole time honestly after 30 minutes that pissed me off two out two and a half hours of dolly parton okay i love her okay jesus by the way i sat in the back they sat in the front they were like yeah car ride i went full uber driver they tried talking to me i was like no thank you no talk

21:04Hannah Berner: just you have to lay down put your headphones on lay down didn't say a word they were like are you

21:09Paige DeSorbo: okay and I was like I put no talking on the uber app like please leave me alone so yeah the wedding was fun I did a little dancing speeches but I just you went to more weddings this summer than me

21:23Hannah Berner: I'm so sick of weddings I really there's literally I don't want to go to any weddings next year I have one wedding my girlfriend Ariana next summer in Greece that is like the only wedding I want to go

21:36Paige DeSorbo: to from now till then i did it was a church wedding too and i haven't been in church in a minute um long long sermons can i say something that's like a bit controversial and like people

21:51Hannah Berner: might look at me differently but i'm just gonna like speak my truth you love a church wedding i do love a church wedding i definitely will have a church wedding as someone who like travels with rosary beads yeah obviously I actually was packing my bag to go to the airport and I was like Hannah would die laughing I have like a rosary beads case with rosaries in them and like a little handkerchief that my grandma gave me that I think was her mom's that's beautiful I have that but then I also have another rosary bead case that has this like little charm lock on it that my grandpa gave me and I travel with both those items and I used to keep them in my car because I feel like wherever I go they protect me anyway that's like a not even that's a whole nother podcast that's a whole nother podcast at weddings I and like I've been obviously I've been to family weddings I've been to like close friends weddings I've been to like I'm the plus one I don't know anyone at this wedding it does not matter what the wedding is I don't feel comfortable dancing ever I don't care who I'm with I don't care who my date is I don't care like how comfortable I am at the wedding how drunk you are it doesn't really ever cross my mind to get on the dance floor at my

23:10Paige DeSorbo: wedding at some point there was like a crazy grind line where someone's feet were being held in the air and like there was and you were I remember seeing you just like you were sitting that's insane i have a traumatizing wedding dance story okay it's not that traumatizing but i just remember i was like 17 and you know like actually that's like the weirdest age to be at a wedding because you're like it's so weird you're like i just remember being like i don't want to dance like i was like you want to dance and you're like oh i was gonna work with who and yeah i tried to dance i think and then i like came down sat down and my mom was on a dance floor and i was sitting mom dances he goes you see how she moves her hips that's how you need to learn how to dance and i

23:53Hannah Berner: was like what the fuck yeah maybe it's because i don't think consider myself a dancer like i don't consider myself a good dancer that maybe that's my insecurity but i don't but then i look at people and i'm like okay well i couldn't dance as well as that person so it's not that i just think it's like i don't know what it is in me that i'm just like i don't wanna wait no one talks about dance

24:18Paige DeSorbo: anxiety it's so fucking real and i feel it the second i hit the dance floor i'm like everyone's staring at me right now and then i'm like that was oh i didn't hit everyone's staring at me didn't hit that oh and then like bad bunny comes on and i'm like i don't know that's it i don't

24:31Hannah Berner: know if i can yeah i just like feel i feel more comfortable being like at the bar and mingling than I do going on the dance floor.

24:40Paige DeSorbo: You guys know Des loves dancing. Does he? He did Dancing with the Stars in Ireland. You guys should all Google it.

24:47Hannah Berner: It's a crazy era in his life. So when you get to a wedding, is he like, okay, come on, let's get on the dance floor?

24:52Paige DeSorbo: Yeah, so then I was talking to a giggler, obviously, and I'm looking at him, middle of the dance floor, going crazy, starting to sweat, waving me over. I'm pretending I can't see him. And he keeps waving me over. I'm dying in that moment. And I'm like in a deep conversation with the giggler and I'm like, yeah, mom is working right now. And then finally, I'm like, fine. As I go over the crowd, like he's everyone's like, yeah, come in. They start opening it. Next, you know, I'm in the middle of a circle. No. And I look at him in the eye like my eyes were scared. I was like, I did not sign up to be the middle of the circle.

25:25Paige DeSorbo: I signed into like be on the side dancing. Middle of the circle. So scary because only move I have is the worm. Otherwise, like what do you do in the middle?

25:33Hannah Berner: And you can't bust out the worm at not a close friend's wedding.

25:38Paige DeSorbo: This is Dez's friend's wedding. This is not even my friend's. No. Like my friend's wedding. Anything I do, they're like, no, that was funny, Hannah. This is what the fuck's going on who let that girl dance for. Even though you're his wife, essentially as a plus one at a wedding,

25:56Hannah Berner: I feel like it's your duty to kind of like, I don't think you should stand out. 100 % I don't think you get in the middle of the floor and you're commanding the room because at

26:08Paige DeSorbo: some point people are going to go who is this person 100 % and yeah like I don't need to be dancing you know with the mom and the grandma in the middle doing like they were like greek and we started doing like a greek I was teaching people like but look if you have fun you have fun and totally there's some people that you should hire for your weddings like that are just really good wedding guests like they add to the vibe it takes one person to make a wedding fun hannah i was

26:36Hannah Berner: thinking about that because i was like i don't for my own future wedding i don't want to kill the vibe of the dance floor and i was like what if i just hired actors that were like dancers that like got

26:49Paige DeSorbo: people to dance in the hamptons we met maurice through southampton social and he is the most fun amazing guy ever who i stay in touch with and for my wedding obviously he was invited when i tell you he made my wedding yeah like maurice was the dj the hose the dancer the

27:09Hannah Berner: greeter like he did everything who was your dj i don't remember who did your i got like a cool

27:14Paige DeSorbo: girl dj and the music was good anyway oh my god it was good it and it feels so long ago i was like was that when weddings like i don't even remember you guys i picked the first dress i picked out in a strip mall like this was a different time that was like a fever dream like i don't that is you're married wait i i got announced yesterday they were like and next is hannah burner who resides in the lower east side with her cat butter and i was like definitely have a

27:48Hannah Berner: husband wait i have a question has des ever said anything because have you ever had a conversation about changing your last name we've talked about the concept of it but he he knew I mean we've

27:59Paige DeSorbo: talked about I was like can our kids have my last name oh would you okay okay you took it one step

28:05Hannah Berner: further okay as someone who has thought about changing my last name my whole life like literally even when I was like 10 years old I'd be like and isn't it crazy I won't always be Paige DeSorbo we're so different I literally was like my name is burner it'll always be burner and I was gonna take that from me I'd be like what do you think my last name will be let be and my mom would be like I don't know but right now it's just Sorbo now at 33 honey I'm Paige DeSorbo I am no one else I am Paige DeSorbo and those kids can have his last name fine I don't really even know those kids yet so I am fine with that but my name I don't want to change it anymore which I never thought never even if you asked me like five years ago are you gonna change your last name

28:53Paige DeSorbo: I'd be like well yeah it's so crazy you've changed a lot over the last three years

28:59Hannah Berner: through this podcast I've changed a lot I've changed a lot through this I when I did Morgan Stewart I was talking about our tour and how like transformational it was for me as a woman our tour and your bachelorette party were two really pivotal moments in my womanhood because

29:18Paige DeSorbo: Because you did a photo shoot the whole Bachelorette.

29:20Hannah Berner: I just felt myself.

29:24Paige DeSorbo: You were like, I just felt like it was finally a time for everyone to celebrate me.

29:29Hannah Berner: Yeah, it was like finally my time to shine. You know, I'll never forget that green sparkly dress. I think about that green sparkly dress all the time. I can't find that.

29:38Paige DeSorbo: You're like, finally women embraced me as who I am truly. And you were there. People have been re-listening to the pod from the beginning. someone was like and I was like are we like really fucking stupid in the beginning and then they like kind of pause and I'm like have we actually evolved and changed at all and she was like not really

29:56Hannah Berner: no and thank god and thank god imagine now imagine we like evolved into like this is like a news podcast or something no even like when we have children like I don't want to talk about them no they're gonna be like des we're like they'll be mentioned yeah like we'll know about them There's a lot of wellness brands out there that often greenwash their products, and that means that they try and make it seem like it's more natural or clean than they really are. Have you ever ordered something that claims it's going to do something and then it just never does? Well, Nature Sunshine doesn't just talk about the planet.

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31:10Hannah Berner: Try Nature Sunshine and experience the difference with supplements that are better for you and the planet. Go to NatureSunshine.com today and use code Giggly for 20 % off your first order, plus shipping. That's code Giggly for 20 % off your first order at NatureSunshine.com. If you like YouTube, you'll love YouTube Premium. It's destroying athlete, creator, and YouTube Maxer. YouTube Premium enhances how I use YouTube with awesome features like offline downloads so I can download my favorite training videos before I hit the gym. So no Wi-Fi doesn't turn leg day into loading day. Plus, I get ad-free videos, background play, and so much more.

31:46Hannah Berner: YouTube Premium, it's like YouTube got some extra gains. Try YouTube Premium for two months free at youtube.com slash premium. Trial eligibility varies. Terms apply. Cancel anytime. Giggling in bed brought to you by Mattress Firm. Autumn in New York is booked and busy, and so am I. It's shows, dinners, it's tennis. It's being on your feet from 10 in the morning until midnight in shoes that were probably not built for walking. and I love it. I do, but there is a stretch where I was getting home at one in the morning and just collapsing and the first thing I finally clocked is that one part of that month that actually needed to be working was the sleep part.

32:23Hannah Berner: That's the only recovery you can get and my mattress was not holding up its end. The issue was I had zero bandwidth to fix it. Have you ever tried to research mattresses? A thousand brands, everyone online says something different and I could not tell you what half the words on the tag meant. So I went into Mattress Firm and I talked to a sleep expert. Mattress Firm's sleep experts make it simple to find your perfect bed. I told them how I actually sleep. They narrowed it down and that was that. For the great sleep you deserve, visit Mattress Firm during the upgrade your sleep sale. They make sleep easy.

32:56Hannah Berner: I went to the US Open last

32:58Paige DeSorbo: night and when you get there now like the US Open wasn't like this. Now it's like you get out and there's immediately a red carpet. And someone asked me, like, interview was, like, where's Paige? And I was like, Paige isn't badass. She couldn't make it. She was supposed to be here with me. But I ended up watching the Novak Djokovic match, and he, like, puked the whole time.

33:18Hannah Berner: Wait, I saw that on my Instagram. Yeah, I was, we're sitting there watching. The headline was, like, his body betrayed him. I was like, oh, okay, but when I do it, it's, like, maybe. You're weak.

33:31Paige DeSorbo: no i like he walked to the side and i'm like i can see him from there and i'm like he just poofed and does is like there's no way he just puked i'm like i saw water come out of his mouth wow i wonder what was going on dehydration who knows but it was like just watching a man maybe he was anxious looked like he was gonna faint like the whole thing so

33:51Hannah Berner: but it was beautiful it was very fun and he lost in five sets no in five sets it was a

33:58Paige DeSorbo: five-hour match we didn't even get to see venus williams we had to leave because it was past

34:02Hannah Berner: des's bedtime um oh my god what time did they go on like at midnight also venus is like in her

34:10Paige DeSorbo: 40s they made a grunt at midnight wait wait yeah wait yeah and then played for how long probably two hours no no tennis is the sport is insane like why wouldn't they just be like okay back tomorrow morning because there's a whole schedule and it affects the whole draw but But Venus definitely was like, are you fucking kidding?

34:31Hannah Berner: Yeah, I feel like that's like a crazy disadvantage.

34:34Paige DeSorbo: Well, but no other sport. I mean, golf takes forever. Yeah, but like it's not the same kind of physical stuff. Tennis, you could play a five-hour match, just you running for five hours.

34:47Hannah Berner: Thank you so much for bringing that up because I saw like this golf thing the other day. They were interviewing someone and it was like a golfer that I'd like recognized, but I saw an interview with him and I was like, oh my God, he got so old. Like, I guess I haven't seen him in like years, whatever. I don't even know what his name is. Irrelevant. But then they were showing like other golfers that are like top golfers right now. And I'm like, I'm like, wait a minute. I look in the mirror every single day and I look at my body and I think, how could you be better? And that's the plight that women have to bear.

35:17Hannah Berner: That's the burden that we live with. And I'm looking at these men and I'm like, never once you thought, hmm. I'm a professional athlete. Maybe I'll lay off the Oreos this week. I mean, it's shocking, Hannah. It's actually shocking. Is there another sport where you don't have to be physically fit at all? I mean, at all. These men, I'm like, how many beers did you put down last night? That is a crazy gut. If I've ever seen one, you're only 35. What is your excuse? I'm going to have an argument.

35:45Paige DeSorbo: If you have to wear a belt when you play, it's not a real sport.

35:49Hannah Berner: And I'm going to concur with that. As someone who's never played a sport but has worn a belt, I concur.

35:55Paige DeSorbo: And I love golf, but it's more of a sports skill than like a full sport.

36:01Hannah Berner: I just feel like if there's a chance, not saying I would win, but if there's a chance I could beat you in a race, I don't think that you're a professional athlete. That's crazy. You're very fast. Okay, as the fastest girl in the fourth grade, I understand that. But I just thought it was I was just looking at them and I was like, oh, my God, it must be so nice to be a professional male golfer because you don't have any body dysmorphia at all. And you don't have you don't have like a body standard.

36:31Paige DeSorbo: You also get to just like fuck off your family for seven hours because you're doing a job and playing with your boys and then traveling the world and like never calling your kids. It's kind of crazy. but anyway I recorded a podcast with Maria Sharapova yesterday and I'm still processing

36:51Hannah Berner: I saw that on your Instagram so it was a live recording of a pod yeah so your outfit was oh my god thank you it was a Zimmerman set that I found online you looked like a professional tennis

37:06Paige DeSorbo: player who was coming to give a talk so I'm such a nerd that I was like I know Maria Sharapova's fashion style like even in this era of her life like i know what she likes to wear and i was like she would wear this and i walked in and she complimented my outfit and i was like honestly i was trying to channel you and she immediately starts joking she's like i mean i would have tucked in the shirt and immediately i'm like i fucking love her this is marie sharp hope by the way this is one of the greatest tennis players to ever play the game who raised me even though

37:40Hannah Berner: she's like three years old than me if someone ever said that to me i would have started crying

37:43Paige DeSorbo: no no we immediately start busting each other's balls because look when you meet really famous people there are all kind of energies that you get totally and i've you leave the room sometimes being like wow like i didn't even make eye contact with that yeah like that was weird that was scary like they really did not want to make eye contact with me and then you think it's your fault like i think i threw up after i interviewed martha stewart i was like that was the scariest thing i've ever done in my fucking life and by the way maria sharpova is known to be like intimidating on the court that's her whole thing like she never smiles she's she's got the slavic energy she's she's serious yeah and strongest mental she's incredible and i immediately were like joking and laughing and then i didn't realize it was her first ever live show her first ever live podcast Oh, wow.

38:38Paige DeSorbo: This is so Maria Sharapova. Wasn't nervous at all. Like, just, like, didn't even mention to me. He was just standing there.

38:43Hannah Berner: Do you think there's any tennis players that take beta blockers?

38:46Paige DeSorbo: I don't know if you could do it, like, during a physical activity like tennis. I don't know if it affects, like, the oxygen to your brain. Interesting. Because I've thought about it.

38:55Hannah Berner: But I think they're on, like, SSRIs for sure. I need to know what the professional athletes are doing when they get anxious.

39:01Paige DeSorbo: Also, Maria Sharapova. So savage. the podcast begins she's interviewing me which by the way is the weirdest thing ever and she goes this is a quote from you i'm now in stand-up comedy but my dream was to win wimbledon i go okay okay right to the heart so then i just look at her and i go um yeah what was it like to win wimbledon and she goes felt pretty fucking good and we're just like literally

39:33Hannah Berner: making fun of each other. That's so your type of friend.

39:36Paige DeSorbo: I knew I was going to be enamored by her. I didn't know I was going to fucking vibe with her. Like the chemistry was just so fucking fun. Like I just wanted her not be annoyed by me and then it got into I was like, it felt like I was with a sister. I don't mean to like make you jealous.

39:54Hannah Berner: No, it's okay because that's how I felt about Morgan Stewart. About Martha Stewart. No, Morgan Stewart. Oh, I just said Martha Stewart. I was like. martha definitely didn't vibe with me that's for sure that's on camera martha was disgusted by you but when i met morgan i was like so nervous and then i was like wait we're friends i was like we

40:13Paige DeSorbo: have the same personality when someone makes you feel like you could be yourself how like immediately you stop being a weirdo and yeah i spent an hour with her and like just the effect she had If you Google Maria Sharapova, her fashion is next level. She also came on like she's blonde. She's like this 6 '2 Russian. But she like knew herself. And every girl wanted to be Maria Sharapova growing up.

40:46Hannah Berner: Did she grow up in Russia or she grew up here?

40:49Paige DeSorbo: She was born in Russia. And then at a very young age, her parents like put all their money into. like imagine being like we're putting everything into this like six-year-old girl and i was with her manager her agent he's been her agent since she was 11 years old oh my god i was like how did you know she was the one he's like i looked at the tennis academy and you knew you're like she's gonna do it and like four years five years later she won wimbledon wow good for her but it's crazy she's 39 and she's lived so much life yeah oh okay so chelsea handler's always been friends with maria sharpova and like i would see chelsea handler in her box watching her matches and i thought was like the coolest thing i've talked about this but like i just need to reiterate and then maria sharpova on the pod it comes out on wednesday pretty tough pod um but she tells this story that is so funny about chelsea handler which is so chelsea so chelsea chelsea goes to the olympics in london like 10 years ago with her now for chelsea obviously this is a vacation this is fun we're drinking pimps yeah and she puts her in the player's box now in the player's box at the front is the coaches who are like coaching right right she says she looks at her player's box Chelsea Handler's next to her coach, yapping, cracking jokes, making fun of him, drinking, probably on drugs, leaving, coming back, like, just chaos.

42:17Paige DeSorbo: And Maria Sharapova's like, what is she doing? But Sharapova wins the match and is, like, super sister. So she's like, hey, Chelsea, you have to do that for the next, like, the whole tournament. You have to sit there. So then Chelsea stays the whole tournament. And in the finals, Sharapova loses to Serena. And she said Chelsea came up to her afterwards and said, what the fuck was that? Oh my gosh. But anyway, shout out to Girls Girls because that is the kind of support I want to have for women.

42:47Hannah Berner: Yeah, shout out to women in sports and women supporting women in sports and Chelsea Handler.

42:55Paige DeSorbo: And Chelsea Handler. And by the way, Chelsea, she is that girl. Like she's that person who will support you even if she's drunk.

43:00Hannah Berner: And that's important.

43:02Paige DeSorbo: And that's important.

43:03Hannah Berner: that's really important in our society we're not always in our right mind because i've had a lot of people who get drunk and don't support me i've had the exact opposite happen in pretty much every

43:14Paige DeSorbo: relationship i've been in but anyway now i'm trying to put together a text back to marisha i don't know what to do but like i'll i'll deal with that on my own time i love that okay awesome

43:24Hannah Berner: thank you thank you thank you thank you for that dissertation yeah i was really excited to tell everyone about it um what are you excited for the next couple days I'm very excited for the next couple of days Josephine has me or has a schedule for me running she wants to see this she wants to go here she wants to try this restaurant we should get pictures over here so I'm just like gonna go by her schedule I flew in a day early than I needed to be here because I really my body's so sensitive i really needed to just like relax and unpack my clothes and make sure i had all my outfits ready and like one thing hannah there's no shower in my room because they want you to bathe and eat like tortellini there's two tubs next to each other okay oh they want you to hold hands with your romantic partner so there's a bathroom over here right it's two tubs two sinks you think sure where's the toilet you have to come out of the bathroom round a corner there's another bathroom just the toilet and a sink and no shower and no shower i'm like guys you had so many opportunity so many water lines are running through this place we have a bath we have a toilet what should we do with the third one another bath i can't tell you the last time i bathed i'm not a bather i don't bathe i'll do a hot tub i'll live in a hot tub you know i try i actually try and take a bath once a month i think it's good coming i come from a household where my

45:05Paige DeSorbo: mom took a bath every single saturday that's so camcoded she got the bath going she did whatever

45:13Hannah Berner: her like lotions and potions were she shaved she must have been going out that little slut She must have been going out every Saturday night now that I think about it when I was younger. And she would do this before going out? Yeah, she would get ready all day on Saturday. She'd get out of the tub and then she'd do her hair and then she'd do her makeup. And I would just be like, what is she doing? But now I don't remember. Why is moms putting on lotion the most comforting memory? I think because that is the first woman you know. like so like everything she does yeah everything she does is like low-key soothing to you you know

45:58Paige DeSorbo: maria sharpova my my your mom my mom no my literal sister maria she um was for a lot of tennis players are perfectionists and she was saying that having a kid she has one kid is the one thing that's helped her with her perfectionism because she's like you cannot control what's going on right you can plan what you want you can try to make everything go as planned and go right but the kid is just going to be like go fuck yourself do it yeah do it every once as a non-mom when you hear moms be like it's horrible but it's perfect and it's the worst but it's the best i think it's the challenges of it that actually help you grow i'm trying to figure it out as a

46:43Hannah Berner: non-mom thank god i don't have the bandwidth right now does anyone i couldn't think of the worst thing to happen to me than have a baby today someone said they were like whatever you're going

46:55Paige DeSorbo: through just be like at least i'm not pregnant and then to all the gigglers that are pregnant listening to this you're perfect we love you yeah i'll pour one out for you tonight if you like

47:06Hannah Berner: youtube you'll love youtube premium it's destroying athlete creator and youtube maxer YouTube Premium enhances how I use YouTube with awesome features like offline downloads so I can download my favorite training videos before I hit the gym. So no Wi-Fi doesn't turn leg day into loading day. Plus, I get ad-free videos, background play, and so much more. YouTube Premium is like YouTube got some extra gains. Try YouTube Premium for two months free at youtube.com slash premium. Trial eligibility varies. Terms apply. Cancel anytime. I never talked about In Bed with Paige DeSorbo this season. I had my first episode last week and I had Nikki Hilton on, which actually is a perfect example of meeting someone where you're like, what is their vibe going to be?

47:50Hannah Berner: And I, she was so down to earth and normal. It actually was like shocking to me.

47:56Paige DeSorbo: I feel like she's purposely been like, I don't want to be in the public eye as much. It's annoying me.

48:01Hannah Berner: She's like the one of the most normal people ever. Like, I forget. They like asked her to do something. They're like, is it OK if like, do you want someone else to do it? And she was like, no, obviously, like I can do it. Like it was just like I forget what it even was, but she was just very down to earth. But this year it's live. So it's like. The past two seasons, we've recorded it for an hour, like an hour and a half. So like there were times where I could stop and we could reset and like the break. Yeah. Cut things out, add things, whatever.

48:32Paige DeSorbo: Forget people's names.

48:33Hannah Berner: It's a very different vibe this year. And so like we're live. But like she knows the segments that we're doing and like it's only for 30 minutes. So it's actually not that bad. So whatever, we're chatting and we start talking about Daphne and she's like, oh, my God, wait, I have a gift for you. And she just like says, like, can someone get my bag? And in my head, I'm like, wait, we're live. And I know for a fact the Amazon team is like, what do we do? And I'm like, someone get her blue Chanel sparkly bag. We have seven seconds. so they get her bag and they bring it over and she's like opening it and she like hands me this gift and I open the gift Hannah she has a jewelry line she made me a ring with kitty's face on it it's like my new favorite ring and I put it on she goes your fingers are so skinny and I said thank you so much for noticing she goes no no really I'm gonna get you one that fits what is your ring size I've never even I go well it's a four but she goes what like people think I'm lying when I say that but I'm so anyway me and Nikki Hilton have friendship rings with our cats on them and tune into In Bed with Paige DeSorbo I my next guest in September well it's up in the air we'll

49:47Paige DeSorbo: see what happens how do you like um interviewing live it's a it's more pressure because I feel

49:55Hannah Berner: like there's more pressure on me to like think of something funny after because like it's boring if you're just watching us talk about bed and you're not laughing so I feel like I have to like add in jokes where when we tape it sometimes I feel like I can think of a joke for longer where when it's live it's like quick and I'm like this is this episode going to be boring so I'm it's a little bit nerve-wracking but I talk to myself for 30 minutes live all the time on Amazon so I know I can be live for 30 minutes but a lot of people are never have never live like when else would

50:32Paige DeSorbo: they be live yeah how many times can i say live jesus take a shot every time i feel also like sometimes with comedy when you have a little pressure you could be funnier because you don't have time to like overthink the joke you just have to like get it the first time after it was over i

50:51Hannah Berner: I was like, great. And I never have to think about this episode again because it's already out there. Like, I don't have to be like, what are the teasers? What are we clipping? Like, it's done. I love that.

51:01Paige DeSorbo: I love that. So that was nice.

51:02Hannah Berner: Oh my God.

51:02Paige DeSorbo: We've had, we had two like crazy weekends.

51:06Hannah Berner: I can't wait to see the Venice footage. And we're going to a fashion show together. Like a cool one. Next Friday.

51:13Paige DeSorbo: You guys were doing fashion week for a day together.

51:18Hannah Berner: Heck yeah. Friday we're going to the Widerhof show Widerhof very excited

51:25Paige DeSorbo: I've been a fan you wore them on Fallon they're like you know I love one thing about me I love a corset and one thing about you you love Bridgerton

51:33Hannah Berner: and that's where we combined

51:35Paige DeSorbo: that's where we combined

51:36Hannah Berner: and that's our Venn diagram

51:39Paige DeSorbo: cause I love a little snatch in the waist but yeah I'm excited for a day to be running around New York with you

51:48Hannah Berner: I love the outfits that really accentuate the female body. I think that's why we love a corset. You love like... Showing your curves. Yeah, showing a female body. We love it. Not a golf body. Not a male golf body. Oh, someone DM'd me and they said that all men's body standard is Mark Wahlberg. I said, wow, that actually is a good one. But he's also 5 '7".

52:16Paige DeSorbo: and it gives them hope and it's also inspirational wait do you want to hear something funny about men's golf always they're not allowed to wear shorts they have to wear pants because they don't like their knees someone said my knees are kind of white and pale who was like okay we're gonna play this sport but i swear to god if anyone wears shorts i'm gonna freak the fuck out

52:39Hannah Berner: golf has so many made-up ridiculous loser rules my brother said that golf stands for gentlemen and only ladies forbidden is that true no but like good good definitely believes that what does it

52:53Paige DeSorbo: stand for then he probably made that up but like it's it's probably a coincidence and then like men ran with it but do you know i was i played tennis with my old men the other week and one of them was like you know i belong to this like fancy tennis club like you should check it out and he said what the club was and the other guy was like are women allowed in that club i felt like i was in um high school tennis again on the boys team where i was like do i have to fucking beat every single one of you like what do you do are women is that it's still real like there are really old school hamptons clubs like i remember i told you my best friend becca she's a lesbian and an incredible athlete and she's the first ever member of her golf club that is a woman it's normally the husband that brings the wife so they didn't know what to do with her

53:45Hannah Berner: i don't know why it just sounded like she's not a lesbian because she's incredible at being an athlete she's not an athlete because she's a lesbian okay is it the chicken or the egg she's very

54:01Paige DeSorbo: athletic and happens to also be a lesbian

54:03Hannah Berner: but they're not correlated how dare you isn't that crazy yeah that's crazy

54:11Paige DeSorbo: they didn't know how to submit her application because they were like but who's the man and she was like I'm the man I hate people I really do

54:18Hannah Berner: I'm just like you're stupid that's crazy

54:22Paige DeSorbo: on a lighter note I just had the thought to just bring up a random thought every now and then and my thought was I thought I was going to have to keep an eye out more in my life for whoopee cushions really when you're younger they really make it seem like at any time you can sit on a whoopee cushion i haven't seen one whoopee cushion in like

54:41Hannah Berner: a decade well you want to know what ain't shit funny about a prank these days no one's pranking no one's pranking anymore honey i think no one's pranking because shit is really it's like

54:57Paige DeSorbo: it's not funny it's like we're in a haunted house we don't have to like scare people already in the

55:02Hannah Berner: haunted house we don't have to do overtime i also think it was pre-phone like before we didn't have

55:07Paige DeSorbo: mahjong on our phones we were pulling out a whoopee cushion when you got someone on a whoopee cushion like that was game over like that was the end of the night we were like and that's our closer

55:17Hannah Berner: where'd they come from never once do i have a memory of buying a whoopee cushion they just always appeared at your house like you never got them they were one was just there blowing it up

55:26Paige DeSorbo: was disgusting it tasted like a condom and everyone would like blow it up and i was like this is how covid originated like started originating at least it could be the cause of your utis i don't even know but everyone's slob-nobbing on it like no one's getting punked

55:43Hannah Berner: these days because life is we're we got we got we live in it we live in this show punked and that's just what it is wait pranking was like the silliest cutest thing back then pranking is so fun all i did i feel like was like pranks like i remember one time my grandma was like let you can put saran wrap on the toilet and i was like fuck yeah i'm doing it or like putting a rubber band around like the sink so when you turn it on like the spigot thing like sprays at you like yeah that's innocent fun. Imagine if Ashton Goodger hung like an influencer and they were like,

56:22Paige DeSorbo: my cortisol levels can't handle this right now.

56:24Hannah Berner: I'm suing. I watched this girl make a video. I mean, so many people have made TikToks about it, but I watched this girl make a video who like I follow and like, I've never met her in real life, but she truly with her whole chest called herself women like or called herself. No, needed to use women, but use the word woman like, okay. And there's a lot of woman and i'm and i i actually was like i can't ever like another one of your videos again because i do dumb shit that's crazy i love how that's where you drew the line you're like i've had enough no the videos of the men not being able to read i'm like ah also with pranks like we never faked a prank our shit was real nowadays it's like let's pretend that i'm

57:09Paige DeSorbo: surprising you my boyfriend at college props there's all these fake couple prank videos and I'm like at one point after the hundredth videos your husband like is this a prank that you're

57:21Hannah Berner: recording couples and pranks different I feel like very different how so like if that's your whole thing I feel like I would start to like get annoyed but it's fun for like some like randomly doing something or like I love like scaring people like I love hiding behind a door like that's old school that is nothing better that's some innocent fun I do it when you get your brother have you ever scared your cat no you gotta do it you gotta do it if you have a cat at home do yourself a favor call them hide behind something and kitty dies like she literally gets so mad at me i've fallen on the ground laughing because i've scared her so good she literally she's like a human she's like she jumps back and she looks like bitch are you kidding bring some whimsy to your day find a cat and scare it also i'm stressed about halloween's around the corner sorry to bring that up i know what is it what difference does it make for us we're 34 years old when do we stop dressing up i think we stopped also halloween is like then it's like my birthday is right then anytime someone says halloween i think of myself even though it's my mom's birthday on halloween i think of me oh my god you guys are such scorpios i'm like what an amazing birthday gift that must have been she was like oh just the best you dressing up and taking photos no me being born oh like it was her birthday and then four

59:02Paige DeSorbo: days later she had a baby and that is the story of the witch of page the sorbo how she was created the lion the witch and the wardrobe i that is me the lion the witch and the wardrobe

59:17Hannah Berner: i gotta go okay we're gonna we have to stop we're gonna that's where we're gonna end this thing um

59:22Paige DeSorbo: We love you guys so much. Thank you for giggling with us. And we'll talk to you later. Bye.

59:32Hannah Berner: Today's episode is sponsored by SoFi, the everything app for smarter money. We won podcast of the year. We wrote a book. We have a tour. We have a company. Technically, we are businesswomen now. And honestly, that's terrifying because you don't build a company out of giggling without eventually having to learn how money works. We learned in public, mostly by getting things wrong at first, like finding out our money could be earning money just by sitting there. Because apparently having money sit in a checking account doing absolutely nothing is not a financial strategy. That's where SoFi can help.

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