Giggling about showgirls, summering, and life in your 30s

0:00Hannah Berner: This message is brought to you by today's sponsor, Walden University. Set a course for change. Now is the time to make a real change in your life, career, and community. At Walden University, we give you the support and flexibility to get the W. Walden's online programs are designed for working professionals like you. You'll gain hands-on skills to take on real-world challenges and succeed. Your future is waiting and Walden is here to help you achieve it. Take the first step to make your impact. Visit waldenu.edu. Walden University. Set a course for change. Certified to operate by Shev. Okay, you guys know I live for just doing the thing, not overthinking it.

0:43Hannah Berner: Like, why do we need to spend so much time playing it safe and staying inside our comfortable little bubbles? Honestly, the absolute best parts of life happen when you just follow your heart and take a little risk. Like imagine going to Europe, getting a little lost down some gorgeous cobblestone alley and trying to order an espresso in a language you don't even know. It's fine. That kind of vulnerability is literally how you grow and actually figure out who you are.

1:06Paige DeSorbo: And that's what you're doing right now. Flew Delta Airlines all the way to Capri. The vibe on the Delta flights to go to Europe are so chic, elevated. It just makes you feel like a little princess. And I got my Delta headphones and I'm watching my movies. I also think it's so important to travel and Delta takes care of you during the travel so that you can grow and learn about new cultures and just experience new things. We can't just stay in our bedroom all the time, even though it's comfortable. And when I travel, I just learned that the world that no one cares and like the world is just so much bigger than you.

1:43Paige DeSorbo: And that's comforting. It gives you perspective. Yes. So traveling is the ultimate way to experience a major personal growth and just see what happens. Step outside your comfort zone this summer and fly with Delta Airlines. Honestly, they completely changed the game for European travel and make the whole journey feel so elevated and special from the second you board. Go book your next great chapter right now at Delta.com. Sup, gigglers.

2:10Hannah Berner: Harriet, fix the Wi-Fi.

2:12Paige DeSorbo: Manifest that shit.

2:13Hannah Berner: We can't be managed.

2:18Hannah Berner: I mean, the day just got away from me.

2:22Paige DeSorbo: Hello, my glowing aura gigglers. I hope you all recovered from our cat readings from last week. Welcome back to Giggly NPR.

2:30Hannah Berner: I know that we say like, okay, let's start the pod. But every time then you actually start, I'm like, oh my god, I'm not ready.

2:38Paige DeSorbo: Okay, can I say my most intrusive thought?

2:40Hannah Berner: Can I remember like what we don't get ready?

2:43Paige DeSorbo: We don't get ready. But my intrusive thought is like, it hit me like yesterday that like, a lot of people listen to this podcast.

2:50Hannah Berner: no sometimes I get actually I actually can't think about it sometimes because I'm like oh I am just sitting here shit talking like I haven't looked into anything I remember you

3:02Paige DeSorbo: nothing's come across my desk it feels like the teacher just called your name and you're like okay time to wing some shit I so first of all I disagree with what was said before me second of all I'm gonna add on to the thing the other girl said and I agree next that is a fear

3:19Hannah Berner: that like still haunts me of being called on in class and you are not have not been paying attention at all and you're like uh how many times did you have to be like i have i don't know

3:31Paige DeSorbo: okay i was a really good student in high school so i was like i literally was that annoying person i was like pick me pick me i was such a pick me but then in college i didn't have time to study because i was playing tennis yeah so for the first time ever i was like trying not to make eye contact with teachers when they'd ask the question i'd like pretend i dropped my pencil no it was so i'd like kept dropping my pencil whenever they asked the question i'd be like i'm finding my pencil no my tricks knew no bounds no i mean this look this podcast is about cheating

4:01Hannah Berner: in school yeah my other girls had a sore throat i was like you have to hit them with an itchy eye you have to go you have to go so highbrow they're not expecting it wait do you know what we didn't address at all what my birthday we forgot we forgot my birthday stassi schroeder's shaking somewhere she's shaking i literally i have your birthday gift on my counter and i was looking at it the other day and i was like wait is this like so stupid like the things that i got you because here's the thing if you want something you can go you're like okay i'm gonna go get this thing for myself and so I feel like our gift giving it's more like I saw something and I was like Hannah

4:46Paige DeSorbo: needs this is it frog crocs people have been sending me that a lot it's just like okay do

4:52Hannah Berner: you want to know actually what it is oh my god I'm so bad at gift gigglers this is a a press conference right now breaking news I saw these salt I'm on a whole like get like gift giving for like the home so i saw these salt and pepper shakers that are shaped like olives and i was like hannah needs this obviously and then they had a matching like spoon rester like for when you're cooking and it's like a big ravioli and i was like hannah needs see these are things i would

5:24Paige DeSorbo: never even know to get for myself like that's actually so good and so genius i'm like hannah's

5:30Hannah Berner: not cooking but if people come over i want them to think like she has a spoon rest in the shape of a ravioli she's not fucking around she's not looking around and she doesn't take herself

5:40Paige DeSorbo: seriously no like she she has fun with it i did and then i had it engraved and it says happy birthday so like okay that's next level that was unnecessary you didn't need to do that but i do have to say i i turned an interesting age what did you turn that's how interesting it is 34 yeah which is 40 33 is still 30 once you turn 34 you're 40 and that's just math I know exactly what you're talking because 35 35 is 40 34 it's the first time I actually like I've been I'm young I'm young yeah I'm now but I had a little fear I said oh I feel like Paige when she turned 30 I'm scared and then I thought wait I'm 34 yeah no one can make me take a shot again no one can make me go I just look I don't need an excuse I just go I'm 34 look at my birth certificate yeah check my

6:35Hannah Berner: ID I'm 34 that's illegal you want to know what I hated turning 30 then I turned 31 and I realized 30 to 33 that's the same age that is the same age I'm in a different realm I actually do feel like people can call me ma 'am now 34 to 37 same age I have something profound to say yeah for the girls in their 20s who were scared of getting in their 30s it's the best it's the best and I have like

7:03Paige DeSorbo: an example for it you know in your 20s and in your teens how like when you dance you feel like everyone's watching yes and you're like a little you can't enjoy it because you're like that was a weird move I just did or like yeah that was stupid everyone could tell I'm trying too hard and I'm a bad dancer living in your 30s is literally dancing one not giving a fuck if people can see you but actually enjoying dancing I don't identify with this you know what I was in the car yesterday and I was feeling myself and I was dancing and I was literally like this is 34 baby I don't give a fuck I'm like that that weird person like in the club that everyone's like are she okay and it's like well she's having more fun than all of us like that's me now i've never felt more millennial than in this moment oh that was so mean

7:52Hannah Berner: of you 30 you're dancing in the car 34 this is 34 baby and i quote also i was rapping lil wayne like it was so having a day you get a license i was having a day i was having a millennial day

8:05Paige DeSorbo: i stopped trying to be something i wasn't you were like where the fuck is my hillary duff cd like truly and i was like i need well grace filmed a video of me and i kind of panicked and in it i did peace signs and i said something else and she stopped the video and she goes that's two strikes two millennial strikes so i've been in time out you yeah you have to and you're just like you're

8:31Hannah Berner: you're summering sorry you're summering sorry i'm summering but i just feel like there's no

8:36Paige DeSorbo: expectations on me to be fun anymore yeah to be like you don't not having to be cool is where you find your actual cool well it's relaxing like 20s you had to be hot I went out with my family this weekend choogy so choogy and I heard my dad say Paige is gonna want to leave in like another hour anyway and i was like first of all spot on and second of all i would have gone

9:09Hannah Berner: then if someone presented the option and third of all i love that i'm like i've hit an age where they're like page doesn't want to keep going and like i even get hit with old page would have loved this and i'm like old page would have old page would have fucking loved this and you know what But new Paige has to go to bed.

9:29Paige DeSorbo: And old Paige did everything she could. She did. And she has nothing left. And let's embrace her and let's thank her. I will never forget when we were at the time party and I said to you, can we leave? And you didn't hear me. And I thought you didn't want to leave. And there was like 10 seconds where I felt like I lost my best friend. Like I was looking around. I was like, I've lost her. I've lost her to this part.

9:51Hannah Berner: You're like her personality. She's different. She's changing. it's kind of like when your friend hangs out with another friend and then comes and hangs out with you they're like a little they're like smell different yeah they smell different they're like oh it's like oh you're they say something like kind of funny yeah where'd you learn that they're like you let you wait when did you go there

10:15Paige DeSorbo: i go when did you ever use that vernacular before i never approved that

10:19Hannah Berner: i never approved that at all wait vernacular is a great word i've never said that word before which is really good okay we have to talk about this because like i know it's it's like late now like oh like it's like it just like it happened yeah but like we only record once a week so it's like we have to sorry we're a week late and that's the news also we have so much news we cover on this pod like we're catching up you never got news a week late like hello look alive it's historical

10:49Paige DeSorbo: Sorry, learn from history Continue Paige You know what I keep thinking of?

10:56Hannah Berner: When I came to the Hamptons And you were like, well obviously we're going to Touch on the classics

11:02Paige DeSorbo: I can't stop saying Also Because Des was there, I feel like we were a little performing Like, look at our friendship We're like, wait You don't know this story? Buckle in

11:16Hannah Berner: we were setting each other up for jokes we were performing we're performers life of a show girl um no what i wanted to talk about was taylor swift going on travis kelsey's podcast okay

11:30Paige DeSorbo: first of all i love travis kelsey i love taylor swift something deep down within me i don't like when girls help men in any capacity okay i'm so glad you worded it like that because

11:41Hannah Berner: here's what I want to say about it because I feel like people were tagging me in things and also people like in the comments on their own accord were like I'm so surprised she like did it on his podcast or like whatever when you're in love you do stupid shit you will truly do anything to help that person why did I just say person like that person person you will do anything to like elevate that person or like yeah you know like she obviously knew then he was going to be on gq and she was probably like wait you know it'd be really cute if i came on your podcast everybody's

12:18Paige DeSorbo: wanting it like so right and one thing about taylor is she loves love she loves love she loves

12:24Hannah Berner: love so i really think anyone thinking that they were in a pr relationship for me which i didn't think that maybe i did like in the very beginning but like i didn't i don't think that but i feel like that kind of proved no they're not like she wanted to do this because she loves this man and she wants him to get those views and those clicks and you don't want a man that has no passion or a job I mean obviously he plays in the NFL but like she's like we're gonna need to up your podcast listen yeah like he's not gonna play in the NFL forever and like now he hosts a number one podcast

13:00Paige DeSorbo: like yeah the truth is is when you love someone they are you like you are the same so it's like her helping him it's not like that um it's more we don't know things so we just see like okay she's perfect and she's helping him yeah look charity is a great thing like more people should

13:18Hannah Berner: philanthropy is like the best thing on the planet yes like everyone should consider at least

13:23Paige DeSorbo: volunteering but unless you're in love don't go on his podcast don't go on his podcast did you

13:29Hannah Berner: listen to it no you saw clippies though I saw clips here's the thing I think because I am on a podcast I don't find enjoyment in listening listening to other people's podcasts because I'm like oh my god wait should I be doing that like am I do I sound like that or like just random things unless it's a very specific podcast that I want to listen to that's a baby there's a baby

13:58Paige DeSorbo: making biscuits behind me that is a cute baby check the youtube this is latte oh my god she

14:05Hannah Berner: looks ai yeah okay here's another thing um i've been getting duped with ai videos i feel like a 65 year old mom on facebook and i'm sending it to my kids like look at this unless something

14:19Paige DeSorbo: happens to me in person i don't trust what i read online and i also don't trust what people

14:25Hannah Berner: are saying online i no i don't believe unless it's personally we say online i don't trust this

14:34Paige DeSorbo: pod i don't trust other pods unless it's fucking happens if you see it with your eyes in the room yeah unless i was in the room unless you stabbed the person it didn't happen no i don't trust

14:47Hannah Berner: anyone what ai tricked you a whale it was a whale video and oh that'll do it that'll do it

14:55Paige DeSorbo: because you're not familiar with the with whales and their their ways i'm not specifically familiar

15:01Hannah Berner: but i literally now check the comments and for someone to be like this is ai and i'm like oh oh my god wait one more thing i want to say about the taylor swift thing yeah i did clock that she You said a lot of Giggly Squad phrases. And not that we started any of those phrases. We plagiarized all of them. Most of them. Like they're common phrases.

15:22Paige DeSorbo: We took words that were already invented and put them together. Yeah.

15:26Hannah Berner: She quoted, we ride at dawn.

15:30Paige DeSorbo: No, she didn't.

15:31Hannah Berner: Yeah, she did. She said, we ride at dawn about something.

15:34Paige DeSorbo: No, she didn't.

15:34Hannah Berner: Then she said, I'm pretty sure she said women in STEM. No, she didn't. I might have made that one up. I might have made that one up. she said hello gorgeous gigglers we know taylor's a giggler because she's smart funny

15:49Paige DeSorbo: and talented and rich and she has cats and cats and she has cats no like she's definitely a giggler and i have to just say her coming out with another album like when does she sleep it's so iconic because one thing that we do love which is so funny because we pretend we don't

16:05Hannah Berner: we love a hard-working girl love a hard-working girl we love a girl that while people are talking

16:11Paige DeSorbo: shit about her she's too busy working to even know what people are saying no that's literally

16:16Hannah Berner: like when when hayley was like sorry i'm busy signing a billion dollar deal like i don't have

16:23Paige DeSorbo: time for it and taylor throughout all her ups and downs in her life has continued to create what she loves and i also love this album the showgirl element like i'm obsessed who doesn't love a

16:34Hannah Berner: little glitz and glamour it's giving us on tour no the life of a showgirl it really it's tough

16:40Paige DeSorbo: what if her next album's beta blocker beta blocker beta blocker blues okay if she says

16:46Hannah Berner: beta blocker in one of the songs then we know she's Taylor Taylor if you say beta blocker we got you like we won't say anything speaking of big pharma I unfortunately was hit with another UTI this past week you hate to see it you hate to hear about it thoughts and prayers go out and I've realized that I get one every five months is like my sweet spot. I feel like that's a lie.

17:13Paige DeSorbo: I feel like if we rewind the track, Grace, Chris, rewind this, it's a little more often than every five months.

17:20Hannah Berner: My last one was in April. I checked my medical records. Oh, so you're counting when you get hospitalized for UTI? Yeah, when I have to go on literal antibiotics. I'm not talking about text messages where I'm like sorry can't call me UTI not to mansplain you but have you tried boric acid uh not a standalone but if it's in any of my vitamins then yeah I'm I take like um D manos I think it's called and like I drink a powder vitamin every day for like strong bladders and I mean I'm doing the I'm not just out here willy-nilly I'm putting in the work and I'm putting in the time.

17:59Paige DeSorbo: A company sent me like a boric acid thing that you just stick up your pussy. And it's supposed to be really good. So just look that up. Not that you need more things sticking inside you because you put everything inside you at this point. So we have too many variables to even have like a good experiment. Wait, are you still on your UTI?

18:20Hannah Berner: I actually finished my antibiotic yesterday.

18:23Paige DeSorbo: Should we call it a UT?

18:24Hannah Berner: UT, I feel like it is Bama Rush right now and I feel like I would be like, my husband, U-T-I. Gamma, gamma, U-T-I. But here's what I'm here to say. I wasn't in New York City when I felt it hit. And like, that's when I go into pure panic mode. I don't think people realize that, remember One Medical, like it was a separate app? Yeah. That Amazon owns One Medical now and you can literally go on your Amazon account, go on One Medical, type like text to a freaking doctor and be like hey i have a uti and they're like cool where's your pharmacy and they just send it i got an antibiotic in 20 minutes amazon is taking over

19:06Paige DeSorbo: they're doing same day stuff which is like coming for instagram amazon is is getting very powerful

19:12Hannah Berner: they're getting really powerful and although that is terrifying and i am employed by that

19:21Paige DeSorbo: I'm here to say I'm for the one medical like I know one medical is amazing I I use it it's amazing you guys this is a health podcast this is like this is like tips and tricks

19:34Hannah Berner: on living life like this is just something I've experienced in my everyday life and I I'm proud of it but I do keep getting tagged in random tiktoks of like you might have a six month old std and i'm like guys no because one thing the good blues are is looking out for us but leave me out of that one it's oh that's what taylor swift said she said it's none of my business she said that there might be and you want to know what bitch i agree she there might be headlines about me and my name could be in headlines and it's still none of my business Did she say that? Yes.

20:15Paige DeSorbo: Oh my God. I love her.

20:17Hannah Berner: And I've never felt more seen because I'm like, wait, I could be, I could be the subject of an entire, why was I just going to say eulogy? That's so scary. That's when someone dies. That's the thing. I wanted to say monologue.

20:33Paige DeSorbo: Words are powerful. Let's pick the right ones.

20:36Hannah Berner: And it might be none of my business.

20:40Paige DeSorbo: And the none of my business tour starts in September. Yeah. get your tickets now no none of my business the concept is so powerful because if you we're in a world where you can make everything your business and as humans we cannot consume so much information about ourselves about our friends it's not natural no so that's why that's why trad wives are coming back we need a break that's why trad wives are coming back that's why maybe the amish were on to something like a calm should we do should we start like an amish but like where the women are allowed to speak or is that scientology it's just i don't want to be in a i want to be alone yeah pods pods i just want to be alone like 80 i want to invent a social media where it just shows you what you need to know like and you put it in like you're literally like i need a cat video a recipe and that's it like i think information actually needs to be we're on overload

21:48Hannah Berner: no that's why i keep saying like i need andy and a camera in pamela anderson's home just watching her like do laundry fold laundry load the dishwasher I want calm soothing energy at all times if I couldn't have loved Majori enough now I love it even more because of Emma Navarro she's the brand's first ambassador and a tennis star Majori just launched play for the 2025 US Open, it is truly my favorite time of year. And Majori's modern stackable designs are great for on and off the court. Play really reflects that jewelry is an extension of your identity and your self-expression, especially in women's sports.

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25:15Hannah Berner: Save 25 % on your first month at ritual.com slash giggly. That's ritual.com slash giggly for 25 % off your first month. This episode is supported by FX's The Shards, a seductive drama from executive producer Ryan Murphy set in 1980s Los Angeles. The series follows a group of glamorous, deeply entangled high school seniors drawn into a life of wealth, beauty, parties, and excess. At its center is Brett, whose reality begins to unravel when the arrival of a new student coincides with a series of mysterious murders. FX's The Shards, now streaming on Hulu. When your mental health is suffering, therapy can help, but sometimes it's not the whole answer.

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26:34Hannah Berner: complete a short online assessment, and get matched with a clinician who fits your needs and schedule your first visit in days, not months. More than 300 ,000 patients have already found high-quality psychiatric care through TalkIatry. Head to TalkIatry.com slash Giggly to complete a short assessment and get matched with an in-network psychiatrist in just a few minutes. that's t-a-l-k-i-a-t-r-y.com slash giggly to get matched in minutes talkiatry.com slash giggly um speaking of information yeah have you heard that almond nails are millennial yeah that's why i switched to square okay wait you're a bitch because i was like a fucking bitch

27:20Paige DeSorbo: well i saw you go square and you didn't tell me why you didn't tell me why you just did it You just did it and you were laughing at me behind my back being like, look at the stupid millennial. I knew you were mouthing that to Grace. I knew you were mouthing that to her. She goes, look at the stupid millennial with her almond nails walking around.

27:37Hannah Berner: In my defense, I was never an almond girly. I was always square. And then I went almond for a couple months.

27:48Paige DeSorbo: I can't handle how you're saying almond right now.

27:51Hannah Berner: Almond. Almond.

27:53Paige DeSorbo: Almond. Almond. almond stop so i guess you i guess you are saying that i say almonds because i'm not a freak

28:02Hannah Berner: almond almond you're a bitch you're a real problem

28:14Paige DeSorbo: remember you just repeat what your brother said and you'd be like stop it and be like stop it

28:21Hannah Berner: so i've been hanging out with toddlers i was a little sister so i was the one

28:25Paige DeSorbo: fighting for my life well i've been playing with toddlers all weekend and i finally found the perfect game she pretends because all they want to do is improv yeah and we did too many like racing we're just improving it back it up she walks in the room and i said give me a motive what is my character

28:52Hannah Berner: no we're describing kids playing as literal it we are riffing okay do you want to know the kind

28:59Paige DeSorbo: of riffing we're doing so first i see her and i have to make her laugh so i said farty poopy bobby because that's her brother she loves when we shit on her little brother yeah she starts laughing and she goes farty poopy des and i start laughing and then i go farty poopy bed and then we're just naming everything in the room and this bitch was quick yeah and next you know i'm like running on objects but then she would ask where butter is and i'd be like butter's scared and sometimes buzzer butter hisses she's scared so then she walks in this morning and she goes hi butter so i go meow and she goes my name is hannah and we don't like lois and i and so then i hiss it's telenovela that's just no the drama but then she's like okay butter come cuddle and i realized i could lay down close my eyes and that's the game so she was like literally petting my hair and i was going and i was like this is fucking perfect so i literally like napped for 45 minutes and she was being me she was wearing sunglasses being like butter don't be mean to lois she goes Lois is a nice person.

30:08Paige DeSorbo: Don't be mean. And I go, and she goes, Butter, stop it. And poor Butter never wanted to be a part of any narrative.

30:16Hannah Berner: No, this is theater. This is theater.

30:19Paige DeSorbo: And then sometimes she throws in a new spin on things. She should be a producer.

30:25Hannah Berner: This is community theater at its finest. And we need to stop saying children are playing pretend. They're artists. And they're improv. They're comedians.

30:36Paige DeSorbo: do you ever see those kids who like remember things from past lives on instagram i'm obsessed with them i hope to have one one day so i tried to get that out of lois she said something she was like did you ask lois what your aura color is well lois's aura color is pink and purple obviously obviously um i'm gonna ask her that's a really good question she was like you were red because you were a cunt and now you're better and then you went to some you did some emdr therapy and you're much better she's perfect i love her she's perfect um is she still there yeah she's running around right now she's gonna make a cameo later she'll come in and say and say giggly squad oh i did go i was going like and she looked at me and she goes there's no spitting in this house

31:25Hannah Berner: oh my god you're a literal mom in my own house yeah and i said valid that was gross i am so sorry what are like three-year-old girls into she's three right two yeah she loves bluey

31:41Paige DeSorbo: and familiar she it's like very good we actually watched pokemon which i remembered and i was like wait this is iconic yeah um she loves cats little kittens so we're kind of the same person yeah um she loves talking shit about her brother she she literally will be like bobby bobby spilled a water all day she's going up to people going bobby spilled a water wait i'm obsessed with that

32:07Hannah Berner: hold them accountable she goes i know you think that man is all happy and never made a mistake before literally just spilled a water three-year-old girls three-year-old girls really i feel like back to mystic mikaela think something gets society knocks things out of them because the boundaries in which a three-year-old little girl has i standing firm so these she's made a

32:36Paige DeSorbo: friend yesterday also i wish we could make friends like three-year-olds do lois is very social though like she sees someone and she's like okay we're playing like that's what we do and heard this girl we're like singing together and performing and i was like this is like something healed in me speak of the little devil she's just seen me good thing she doesn't know how to open the door she's very confused by doorknobs so she's not getting in you know and and and it comes with age i am obsessed with her i want to freaking eat her um oh wait i also had one more like really important note yes italians calling something a panini yeah is like dramatic it's a toasted sandwich it's not a whole different it's just toasted and they're like oh do you want a panini it's toasted there's whole industries built

33:34Hannah Berner: on basically just a toasted sandwich yep yep that they've created this entire lore that it's a

33:42Paige DeSorbo: completely different cuisine like a panini i mean is it pressed yes but still not enough

33:51Hannah Berner: I argue the question is a bacon egg and cheese a panini I would say because it's not pressed it's not but like is a tuna melt a panini yeah I'd say yes I would argue yes if I was under oath I would testify that yes a tuna melt is a panini wait can you please can you please do the cousin vinnie quote when she said to rose wait this is so funny that you're asking me this because yesterday i was at the track with my whole family and they were like page do the thing um what part was i um the defense is wrong my father my father was mechanic my father's father was a mechanic my brother's a mechanic so yeah i'm an expert imagine you're a dear and you're prancing along you spot a brook you put your little dear lips down to the cool clear water

34:49Paige DeSorbo: and then bam a fucking bullet hits you in the head you think you'd give a damn what the guy who shot you was wearing now i ask you that is the greatest movie of all time and marissa tomei

35:01Hannah Berner: like did she win an oscar for that because if not absolutely robbed she wore a unitard

35:09Paige DeSorbo: the whole time you know the whole time the utis that woman had to suffer no i'm obsessed with that movie oh i remember what i was gonna say about lois yeah okay this part this week is all

35:22Hannah Berner: over the place and we apologize because literally i i can't do anything but quote kylie we're summering i'm literally i'm in the thick of summering i'm in the throes of it and we forgot how to form brain cells no truly anyone that i work with currently right now i've been sending text messages being like sorry i'm just like really not trying to work the month of august and i really truly called me she's like how do we get page to respond to a text i go she's summering babe grace and josephine i'm like hey quick uh update i won't be in anywhere i called do and i was like hey you can't block grace sorry i would like to bring the european union to america for the month of august we're all off i dare you to change your email to be like thanks i'm out of office i'll be returning in 2027 i would love to i would literally love to people are like planning things for the fall i'm like guys no no stop let's live in the present let's live in the moment they're like we need decisions today i'm like i can't the only thing

36:28Paige DeSorbo: i was gonna say about lois was that she said something like when i was in my mommy's belly she said something so then i i immediately clocked that and i said what else did you see when you were in mommy's belly do you remember what happened before you were in mommy's belly and she looked at me and she was like i don't know and i'm like was there a war oh my god do you think lois is reincarnated i don't know but i'm getting to the bottom of it yeah i'm just asking her light

36:50Hannah Berner: questions i'm like you're just peppering her with a little i said do you remember how the pyramids were built were you there imagine i don't i those videos freak freak me out but i do have to make an announcement yeah my summer is like about to be over why oh because you're going on tour no before that my super bowl is happening the u.s open begins oh my god people don't know this

37:22Paige DeSorbo: the u.s open is two weeks yeah and i've never been i'm basically playing in the u.s open this year no one's asked me i haven't gotten a call from anyone but i'm gonna be there um i'm so i'm booked up yeah these next two weeks i'm going to matches i'm interviewing people i'm basically it's sorry there's a cat on my shoulder yeah do you think there's any questions about the u.s open that we can help the girls with because i feel like some girls are gonna go like what should the girls be wearing this year as opposed to other years sorry that was so much sorry you've stumped me that was okay i feel like i get asked this

38:03Hannah Berner: a decent amount yeah when it comes to like what are you wearing i think like morgan riddle and Paige Lorenz really like do such a good job I mean of what they wear and such good inspo but it's like any other preppy event like you're where it's preppy so you're like you have to think east coast Nantucket Martha's Vineyard uh the Hamptons like you have to think that aesthetic and that vibe and anything and it whatever you would wear during the day there you would wear to the U.S. Open.

38:38Paige DeSorbo: Do you know what I think Hannah Coated wise what I wore once that I liked was kind of these like baggy khakis or like white pants. I'd worn it with a tube top which I haven't been wearing lately. But you're 34. No, I'm just kidding.

38:53Hannah Berner: I'm kidding. That was a joke. That was a joke.

38:58Paige DeSorbo: No, you're so valid. I'm 34 with a long torso. I'm not wearing Amazon$12 bandos anymore. like it's let's over let's stop playing games sorry i've never wore the long tour yeah it's insane it looks like a bandeau um i love madeline klein wore this like i love monochromatic but she just wore like a buttoned up like sweater and then like a like a ralph lauren hat like baseball hat i love dress like a celebrity undercover like a little bit at the u.s open it's like cute also it's very sunny so if you do if you do look good in hats i don't i have a peanut head i i look insane with hats wear a little baseball cap with a cute little outfit um have

39:47Hannah Berner: fun with i feel like saying that you don't look good in hats is so crazy to say that's what someone with pretty privilege would say but i look i look at you more than you look at you period that was crazy wait that's crazy because we both know i don't look in the mirror at all so you don't look in the mirror do you know i tell everyone that too do you know i'm like do you know that hannah like doesn't look in the mirror wait that's actually the right i'm like right before she showers she doesn't even glance she's so healthy she's an epitome of healthy i'm like that's so fucking healthy because you know what what i look like is none of my business none of my business but as someone who looks at you more you don't i wouldn't walk by you and be like damn that's so fucking small i hope she never wears a goddamn hat we'll never find her do you know what is my

40:41Paige DeSorbo: hair is also like not to brag it's like kind of thick and frizzy so sometimes when i put a hat on when i'm wearing my hair down i feel like insane like my hair is like you have great thick long

40:52Hannah Berner: hair for a baseball hat are you kidding it's like that's the sexiest for a baseball hat it's like oh it's like oh i'm a little athletic on top of like okay i'm gonna post i'm gonna post a photo of me

41:03Paige DeSorbo: in a baseball hat and i'll let the gigglers decide they'll vote yeah do it yeah i would like that

41:07Hannah Berner: because you said the same thing about pulling your hair back

41:13Paige DeSorbo: we argued this episode i'm 34 like i can't handle this i can't change now no we can't

41:21Hannah Berner: and i'm gonna start using that as an excuse sorry my best friend is 34 wait i'm two years older than you right now you think i'm coming yeah you are so maybe listen to someone wise who

41:36Paige DeSorbo: knows that hats look stupid on her um but yeah the u.s open is gonna be fun i'm actually i have a crazy thing happening what i'm going with chelsea handler what day but this is the like weird full circle moment one that i taught tennis to her when i was like 21 and she she know she didn't remember two she loves tennis and at one point she was like sitting in the boxes of all the top tennis players if you don't know what a box is basically like the vip table for the match so yeah in someone's box is like their significant other their coaches um their psychiatrists their managers their best friends so like wait they're really their psychiatrist sometimes damn wait you know like we should bring a psychiatrist on tour with us it's it's expensive but it may be worth the investment i would love it like their mental coach they call it but i'm like it's just it's a psychologist let's be honest yeah got it um so because you never know you never know when you're gonna need one hands to god you never know

42:39Paige DeSorbo: so uh like kim kardashii would be in serena's box all the time like it's like cool so chelsea handler was sitting in maria shara pova's box back in the day and i was like oh my god that's so cool like imagine to be a fly on the wall and sitting in shara pova's box watching with chelsea handler in your ear i'm going i'm sitting with chelsea handler in a box whose box i don't know oh like i don't know i honestly don't know it's very i don't have any information like when

43:08Hannah Berner: chelsea handler says hey hey we're gonna go cars picking you up yeah be ready i'm a i'm afraid

43:14Paige DeSorbo: very exciting what if i do mdma at the us open tell me how it is wait you're going on wednesday i'm going wednesday no but we're going the following week because it doesn't start till the following week yeah this is like a mixed doubles promo got it got it got it got it got it

43:32Hannah Berner: but okay yeah we're going on the following week and i can only go well i really only go once a year you yeah you make your appearance sometimes i'll go more if it's like a if it my schedule allows it true but this year i thought i wasn't going to be able to go at all but i'm go we're going one time together because then i have to go away for a wedding so i'm missing all of it pretty much italy thing i have to go to tuscany for a wedding and i'm so very excited because one i've never been to tuscany and two like this is black tie honey like this is an extravaganza of a wedding so i'm like very excited i have i have no looks obviously but again how many looks do you have to wear i go to italy i like to keep the bar low well i have like a welcome party a rehearsal dinner and then the wedding so I have three looks I need to do oh my god no it's a lot of pressure it's so much pressure to go to Tuscany no I saw a TikTok the other day and it was just like I think it was Christina Kirk Kirkman oh yeah she's so funny I think it was Christina Kirkman she said something about like men like packing for a trip like versus a guy it's just like okay they'll bring like 12 pairs of shorts and 12 t-shirts great and you're like doing the math like okay if we're there for seven days and I have need three outfits a day it's like that well that's 21 outfit and like that it's a seven day trip will put me over the edge Paige I was talking to male comic the other day and I was like what do you wear on your tour and that's what I love the honesty from the men like the the earnest in their voice where they're truly perplexed is my one of my favorites This off to college season, save on college and save the everyday.

45:25Hannah Berner: I remember when I first got to college and I thought I was prepared. I know everything that's happening. I was so focused on my daily outfits and making sure I had the perfect aesthetic that I completely forgot about one major part of college. And that's themed parties. Every other week, there was some random theme night and I was always scrambling at the last minute trying to pull something together. Whether it was a costume, accessories, decorations, or something group theme, I somehow never had what I needed and I was constantly making a last minute purchase to save the day. College is already so chaotic enough and it's always the little things that catch you off guard.

46:00Hannah Berner: That's why I love Amazon makes off to college shopping so easy. So whether it's dorm essentials, school supplies, organizational items, or those last minute things you suddenly realize you need, Amazon has great deals, everyday low prices, a huge selection, and the convenience to help you get it all in one place. So remember, with Amazon low off to college prices, just save on college, save the everyday. I was in search of the perfect vanity for my apartment. And when I mean perfect, I mean perfect for me. I wanted something that I could fit the actual seat that goes to the vanity underneath just to save space.

46:35Hannah Berner: And of course, I found it on Wayfair. You can find high quality materials that stand up to real life. And you can shop furniture and decor that's built to last. I've had this vanity now for going on three years. And it is my favorite vanity ever. It also came with a mirror that had a light built into it. You can also shop with Wayfair Verified. your shortcut to durable pieces hand vetted by product specialists using a 10-point quality inspection testing things like quality of materials, functions, and features. With Wayfair, you can create a home you really love without overspending. And there's real proof in their reviews because you can read more than 20 million verified five-star reviews from real shoppers and see real customer photos and feedback before you buy.

47:21Hannah Berner: Join Wayfair Rewards today to get 5 % back on every purchase and start saving on your next home upgrade. Head to Wayfair.com to shop all things home. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com Wayfair. Every style, every home. Wayfair, every style, every home. Okay, can I complain about laundry for a second? Specifically, detergent. Why are those giant bottles so unnecessarily huge? They're awkward to carry, they leak everywhere, they take up my entire laundry shelf and honestly they're kind of ugly. Then I found out some liquid detergents are apparently like 80 % water and I was like what? That honestly explains a lot because I feel like my clothes never smell as fresh as I want them to.

48:05Hannah Berner: So when I found Tide Evo I was like wait this actually fits my life. It's compact streamlined and easy to use. There's no plastic bottles, no drips, no sticky caps, and no water added. It's 100 % concentrated, which is why it's built differently to be Tide's best clean. If you've got a clear front laundry machine like me, it's actually kind of satisfying to watch. You toss it in, add your clothes, and it starts dissolving right away. Now I use Tide Evo all the time when doing laundry. It's just so much easier than before, especially when I know it's all clean and no fuss. Try the new Tide Evo Super concentrated laundry detergent today.

48:44Hannah Berner: Okay, you guys know I live for just doing the thing, not overthinking it. Like, why do we need to spend so much time playing it safe and staying inside our comfortable little bubbles? Honestly, the absolute best parts of life happen when you just follow your heart and take a little risk. Like, imagine going to Europe, getting a little lost down some gorgeous cobblestone alley, and trying to order an espresso in a language you don't even know. It's fine. That kind of vulnerability is literally how you grow and actually figure out who you are.

49:13Paige DeSorbo: And that's what you're doing right now. Flew Delta Airlines all the way to Capri. The vibe on the Delta flights to go to Europe are so chic, elevated. It just makes you feel like a little princess. And I got my Delta headphones and I'm watching my movies. I also think it's so important to travel and Delta takes care of you during the travel so that you can grow and learn about new cultures and just experience new things we can't just stay in our bedroom all the time even though it's comfortable and when i travel i just learned that the world that no one cares and like the world is just so much bigger than you and that's comforting it gives you perspective yes so traveling is the ultimate way to experience a major personal growth and just see what happens step outside your comfort zone this summer and fly with delta airlines honestly they completely change the game for european travel and make the whole journey feel so elevated and special from the second you board go book your next great chapter right now at delta.com

50:20Hannah Berner: i used to summer in newport rhode island shut up often as a young child really yes i think that's why i love period pieces because sometimes we we went to newport maybe like twice in the summer and we and as a child i loved going through the mansion tours we would do so many mansion tours and i was obsessed with it and like you go in like the vanderbilt house and like all these different houses and they give you like it used to be like a tour guide now it's like headphones it's like not as good um but i think that's why i love period pieces because as a young child

50:57Paige DeSorbo: I loved it I've never went to Newport well a lot of Italians are in Rhode Island a lot of Italians are in Rhode Island just say random like public schools in Newport it's probably no public schools in Newport but I'm going for the Tennis Hall of Fame which is so funny because I kind of skipped the whole like playing professionally and just went from being comedian to going to Tennis Hall of Fame but I'm just like going with my parents and Des and wait you're getting inducted into no no but i'm there for it maria sharapova is getting inducted got it got it because you know

51:31Hannah Berner: my manifestation i was like wait a second that that manifestation might be actually illegal and like not fair what is the equivalent i just like okay you know how like all men like men are like if i like if i could have trained i could have been in the nfl yeah like if i was like if i was like an inch taller i totally could have been in the nb like shit like that do women have an equivalent i don't think so because i feel like we are realistic in certain aspects women are more

52:00Paige DeSorbo: than realistic we're like mean to ourselves where we're like oh like i'll be like oh my god you're so good at you know um makeup you could be a professional makeup artist no no no i couldn't no no no i could never do that and i'm like no you're literally doing it no i couldn't

52:15Hannah Berner: i mean literally seven minutes ago you were like i don't wear hats hats are not for me i hate hats i can't wear a hat i could be so many things if i could wear a hat but i can't men will literally wear a hat on the tip top till it tippy tippy top of their head not even on their head and they'll be like this looks cool this looks good and my poor friend won't even

52:37Paige DeSorbo: go near a hat without breaking out and melanoma is looming okay melanoma is looming put your sunscreen on no men wearing their hat on the tippy top who let them who let them i have to confess

52:51Hannah Berner: something and it's so bad because i know that i'm out you thought it was i'm actually i'm switching topics actually you're like we're done something else popped in my hand nope sorry this is so bad and i know because i'm like on here every week being like i love my skincare and like i do this and I do that. I put tanning oil on the other day.

53:12Paige DeSorbo: Paige DeSorbo. Not on my face.

53:14Hannah Berner: I didn't put it on my face. Where'd you put it?

53:17Paige DeSorbo: On your pussy? That's why you have UTI. I saw it.

53:19Hannah Berner: I saw it.

53:20Paige DeSorbo: Did you perineum?

53:22Hannah Berner: No, I didn't. No, I didn't. But I still want to do that. I saw it. I was just sitting there. It looked lonely. I was like, I bet no one's used you in years. Everyone's talking bad about you. And you used to be my best friend. And we had so many good times together. And I miss you. And so I did it on my stomach and my legs and my butt. And I really did the backside of me. But here's in my defense. I feel like in Italy, I didn't really tan the back of me. OK, I had no interest in flipping.

53:50Paige DeSorbo: But that's where you're wrong. The back of you is none of your business.

53:53Hannah Berner: It's none of my business.

53:54Paige DeSorbo: I've never once saw a girl have been like, whoa, back of her leg is not the same color as the front of her leg.

53:59Hannah Berner: Really? I have. Like ever heard of flipping, bitch? Like you can't fall asleep.

54:06Paige DeSorbo: so i've been playing tennis with a bathing suit on and i didn't realize the bathing suit in the back has like a big circle in it because it's a one piece and the back is just circle so i have a full just like circle of a tan on my back but again none of my business i didn't even know it was there and i've been so peaceful until someone told me and i said i don't want to know don't come to me with things about me yeah don't talk shit behind my back literally Lee okay for everyone listening don't use tanning oil Paige you yeah I'm not saying use it I'm just

54:39Hannah Berner: I'm confessing something let me live this is a safe space for me true I do like her honesty that was really good it's and you want to know what I fucking liked it it's okay now I have to step in

54:50Paige DeSorbo: now I have to step in and it did exactly first it's tanning oil then it's heroin then next thing you know, you're stealing from your family and you're losing your job. No, you're tweaking out.

55:02Hannah Berner: Yeah. Tanning oil actually is a gateway drug because if you catch me with like a beach bomb subscription, I'm like, I'm just going to go once a month. Stop me. Truly stop me because that's when I've gone too far.

55:14Paige DeSorbo: You're passed out in the kitchen with tanning oil all over you. And I'm like, God damn it. I've got to get her to work.

55:20Hannah Berner: I'm just like, wait, what if I just tried it? It was just like it was a naughty thing. Look, I'm 32 years old. That's my version of being naughty.

55:28Paige DeSorbo: Yeah, we're going to have to have a New Jersey intervention with you. I love it.

55:33Hannah Berner: I'm obsessed.

55:35Paige DeSorbo: But I do have to say my favorite part about summer being tan is that like I don't have to wear as much makeup because it's like naturally contouring.

55:44Hannah Berner: It's the same with like having a bob. It becomes an accessory. I'm like, I'll put this outfit on and then I'll wear my tan and I'm tan. So like I'll look better.

55:52Paige DeSorbo: it's so good but I really feel bad because my I saw a girl the other day wearing like a red sweater and I was like it's fall oh I thought you're gonna say not for my aura not for my energy not my aura not my energy not my season yeah summer for me is over like it's I'm back to

56:13Hannah Berner: work I've been on bed rest okay that is like really stressing me out because I feel like I I have a good solid like three weeks left of summer and you're like crushing my vibe.

56:23Paige DeSorbo: It's okay because you've been working like really hard every summer. So this you need this. But like September 4th, I'm off to Vancouver, Oakland. I had a tough year. We're out here. You did, but a beautiful year.

56:36Hannah Berner: I had a beautiful year. I had like one of the best years of my life, honestly, actually. I'm like all jokes aside. I actually think this was like this isn't the top three best years of my life. i'm feeling a mental health moment coming because i also feel like you dealt with a lot of adversity

56:53Paige DeSorbo: but you gained a lot of trust in yourself and you became more interesting to me at least i have to deal with you all the time because i'd be like she comes down from the hotel room i'm like what

57:04Hannah Berner: mood is she gonna be and you want to know what start normalizing people walking on eggshells

57:11Paige DeSorbo: around you i like that about no but page because like we've been together when we both have had like mental breaks and we've survived it like could we get any closer i don't think so i think

57:25Hannah Berner: the only way we could literally get closer is if i had a medical procedure and you were in the room with me and i was doing it i was like give me give me the scissor speaking of scissoring i'm three episodes into the hunting wives that is no speaking of scissoring because what in the texas is literally going on on that show

57:55Paige DeSorbo: i'm obsessed with it because i'm obsessed with i don't want okay kind of spoiler but des was like what's it about and i was like how do i explain i said des it's for girls though like it's a show for girls like it's for the girls and he's like well let me let me see first let me watch it first it's determined and i was like no no no no because i actually didn't watch

58:18Hannah Berner: the last episode because i was like that's very mean coded what's going on it's very i have to

58:23Paige DeSorbo: shout out malin ackerman i feel like she's never acted like this before and she's so good in it yeah um but what makes it fun is because you think it's this stereotypical like oh ladies who brunch and spend their husbands money and don't do anything and this new girl comes in who's like very smart and stuff and you immediately think she's better than those women then you realize those women are fucking feminists because they're just fucking each other and taking advantage of their husbands and i'm starting to think we've we've got it all wrong

58:54Hannah Berner: here i didn't see the element of like where they were all gonna like have sex with each other that Like I was like, oh my God, I didn't see that coming. Like when the first sexual thing happened, I was like, wait, that is so not what I thought. See, I can't read certain things in the beginning. I'm like, that was not what I was thinking.

59:12Paige DeSorbo: I think they also wanted to surprise you. Like, oh, why are her tits out? That came out of nowhere.

59:17Hannah Berner: I was like, wait, are they going to pop? Yeah. There is something about a show that I do like that when they give me that question where I'm like, wait a minute, are they about to hook up? Like that excites me.

59:27Paige DeSorbo: i i i also think when that girl was being mean to her i didn't realize she was it's because she was jealous not because she was just like being a bitch to the new girl correct so now i'm trying to think like everyone every girl's been mean to me i'm like were you trying to fuck yeah are you trying to fuck oh my god but that's why like no i just i think it's it was very entertaining the hunting wives i do have something that you guys have to watch documentary about the biggest loser just came out on netflix like the tv show yeah did you watch the biggest the biggest loser we could be referring to a lot of people i mean the list has no idea a new thing at the end of the

1:00:09Hannah Berner: pod we go who's the biggest loser of the week and the biggest loser of the week did you watch that show i didn't but i feel like my grandma watched it so i feel like by osmosis i feel like i watched

1:00:24Paige DeSorbo: a couple episodes i was really into it really i it was so like you'd see people be like my life is ruined by my weight if i could lose weight it would save my marriage and my children and my life and then you watch them get yelled at by jillian michaels like really mean and then they weigh themselves and they lose 15 pounds and then you're like hooked you're like this person but when they reanalyze everything they realize like they're basically telling people like if you're fat you you suck like you're not a human yeah and and you can't control yourself around food

1:01:00Hannah Berner: when everyone everything's losing it so fast though okay it turns out well they were working

1:01:07Paige DeSorbo: out eight hours a day like professional athletes you just see them like on the treadmill puking like lifting tires and these are people who like haven't walked in years is that even safe so there's a doctor that was on the show that was like yo you can't this person's gonna have a heart attack yeah they're gonna die but obviously the producers were like shut the fuck up doctor yeah and they leave it to a reality yeah and they'd make them do embarrassing things like

1:01:34Hannah Berner: not good tv but also could win us an emmy shut your fucking mouth so and then they wanted people

1:01:40Paige DeSorbo: to get bigger and bigger and bigger to make it more exciting with the bigger the people are the less they could like do physically you got to start them off slow then caffeine pills were going around so the and then these people realized i want to win they want to win 250 000 so this one guy was like i was literally just drinking water and lemon and like maple syrup like i did a cleanse he said he was so dehydrated that there was blood in his urine but he won but it was like at what some people left with eating disorders some people their metabolism was fucked forever and they gained the weight all the way back some people were traumatized by the edit because they were given a villain edit and it's like these people are just trying to lose weight yeah and they would make some friends they're not friends anymore because they made the friends fight last story short i was a little traumatized but i got a little PTSD but um at the time the world was different back then and we were like yeah they were transforming these people

1:02:41Hannah Berner: bodies i would argue i mean i watched a show called the swan i was gonna say like that was worse that would look at this hideous specimen of a woman we're gonna change her don't worry you won't have to look at her anyway like that was truly insane and i think that did something

1:02:57Paige DeSorbo: to my brain chemistry and also there was always this like i want to save my marriage like my husband doesn't like me because i'm fat and this woman told this great story where she went there to save her marriage because she was in a toxic marriage and she thought he would stop cheating on her if she lost weight classic she survives all this crazy stuff get gets back looks gorgeous

1:03:15Hannah Berner: and realizes i fucking hate this guy oh that is the best is and gets out of the marriage so it

1:03:24Paige DeSorbo: was less changing her body it was more she changed her mindset there's nothing like waking up there's

1:03:30Hannah Berner: nothing like waking up and being like wait you're a fucking loser and this is embarrassing for me and all my friends i gotta go and all my friends you're like now i have to go an apology tour to my friends god damn it no you literally literally like sorry that was a weird time

1:03:48Paige DeSorbo: thanks for sticking by me the ick is real and i want it's so real i want to say ladies women have been getting the ick since the beginning of the time but they weren't allowed to because we weren't allowed to get divorces but now we can so like go off like have fun um i love the idea that like nowadays we can have multiple husbands yeah like even watching like gilded age they're

1:04:12Hannah Berner: trying to like normalize being divorced because like at that time the only way you could get divorced was if one of you committed adultery and men men were like accepted back into society but like after a woman got divorced even if she wasn't the one that cheated she like wasn't accepted back into society they were like you're done well and you're done literally you're done and it's just so

1:04:39Paige DeSorbo: crazy like in this documentary mr mrs murder they're super religious and they're having a fair together and the guy's like can you divorce your husband so we could be together allegedly and she was like no but if you kill him i think we can and it's like that's not logical like god wouldn't like that i feel like god would be like actually get a divorce you know it's really

1:05:02Hannah Berner: scary to think about and maybe this is like something like in your i mean you're 34 so i'm

1:05:06Paige DeSorbo: sure you've thought about it before i've had a lot of time how many insane people there are

1:05:11Hannah Berner: and you're like you're allowed to do what i do in everyday life it's not safe for other people

1:05:18Paige DeSorbo: my favorite thing is when you see someone doing something in public and you're like

1:05:21Hannah Berner: how did you make it here how did you get past i go through the same school system okay the same school system and somehow you're like you're being crazy you've ever seen someone at a restaurant

1:05:35Paige DeSorbo: like how they're acting and i'm like you've been doing this for how many years and no one's punched

1:05:39Hannah Berner: you in the face hello is everyone okay everyone needs to get a check everyone needs to start

1:05:45Paige DeSorbo: summering more and just be like calm it down calm it down calm down summer fridays embrace it

1:05:52Hannah Berner: embrace it live it learn it put a summer fridays mask on i feel like you just discovered summer this summer i did i'm like an alien you have you heard of this thing called summer summering like like it's a sunday and it's like what will i do i don't know i feel like a young carrie bradshaw I'm like New York is my boyfriend I could do anything today the world is at my feet shout

1:06:15Paige DeSorbo: out to teachers even though they're so so so so underpaid and undervalued but at least people were like they've been dealing with kids all year give them a summer can I say something I do love

1:06:29Hannah Berner: clearing a teacher's list it's an adrenaline rush like no other I'm like fuck yeah they need those

1:06:37Paige DeSorbo: markers are you kidding yeah but i also think the government shouldn't be making teachers have to ask people pay for markers okay i know actually sometimes looking at the list i'm like wait this is like these are such basic things like that yeah every school should have this every school should have it give them a clock how do they know when they're getting to the next and

1:07:02Hannah Berner: And also, I will say, like, as a child, because I loved aesthetic, obviously I'm a pink aura. I judged a teacher by her room. OK, I was like, OK, what's going on here? No effort. The season has been changed. The feng shui is really off. I'm like, really? We're in November. You still have apples up on your poster board with all our names on it. It's time for snowflakes, bitch. Also, you're like, it's getting busy.

1:07:28Paige DeSorbo: Like, let's get some. No border?

1:07:31Hannah Berner: Interesting choice.

1:07:32Paige DeSorbo: snowboarder also clashing clashing colors i was i was very picky on classroom teachers aesthetic i'm like with that outfit that's crazy work i just work i love teachers who were exacerbated like i thought it was so cool i don't think that's the word for what like that was no but you know when like a kid would start acting out and the teacher would be like Jerome I'm not doing this with you Jerome

1:07:59Hannah Berner: No teachers have such a like No I don't know how they do it I don't know how they do it But I did see a TikTok actually Because I'm like deep in I feel like teacher TikTok Well I'm on Amazon looking at so many teacher stuff My phone is like you're a teacher Yeah I saw a teacher say Like never once has she referred to going And being a teacher as going to work She always says I'm going to school yeah and teachers were like duetting it and being because one teacher was like oh no I say like I have work and it's like other teachers were like it's not work it's going to school and I think that's like I never thought of that obviously because like once I left school I never thought

1:08:40Paige DeSorbo: about it again but but some of these people like they loved they loved school so it's like now they get to do it again and make it like amazing for the kids shout out to my teachers shout out to

1:08:51Hannah Berner: teachers because like i feel bad they're coming through a tough time it's gonna they're almost back in and it's scary final note final note so i didn't tell you guys because there was drama going on with grace and boots yeah and i didn't want to upset the gigglers before it was like dealt with

1:09:11Paige DeSorbo: because i wanted to give you an update going on yeah i didn't want you guys like having this on

1:09:16Hannah Berner: your heart we're not gonna say something that and then you have more garners more questions and i

1:09:19Paige DeSorbo: don't want it heavy on your heart while you're going through your week yeah so i'm ready to get boots adopted and the nurse comes back and says sorry you can't bring her to grace she has a fever and when a kitten has a fever that's crazy like it's scary and i was like is she gonna die and they were like we don't know so i text grace and i'm like hey um boots is sick and could die and grace was like are you gonna pay for my trauma therapy and i said 100 this is all my fault it's an hr issue it's an hr issue that we will deal with separately and privately but she

1:09:58Hannah Berner: imagine us dealing with anything separately and also privately could you imagine what a luxury what a luxury to deal with something separately and privately the grace documentary when it comes out is going to be amazing um she's going to be faceless with her voice distorted there's going be so many pliers and like lore and like twists and turns it's crazy there's so many randoms

1:10:22Paige DeSorbo: so boots is getting taken care of they're giving her some meds they're afraid she has this thing called fip it's basically like feet like feline coronavirus and then the vet takes her home to her house so we're like that weekend and we're like oh no like is boots being trafficked but the vet was like making sure she's gonna be okay finally this last week wait that was so nice of the vet no i know she went above and beyond boots has been fever free for five days she's still gonna be on meds but grace has officially taken home boots as of yesterday so we all are cat moms

1:10:59Hannah Berner: and that was quick you did a quick flip on grace how many years is that like three three it's pretty good that's i mean mine was like a solid seven i know well that because we had some bumps

1:11:15Paige DeSorbo: in the road bumps in the road we're very busy with our cats um and busy summering i'm so busy

1:11:22Hannah Berner: summering and i'm not even doing anything it's just me sitting in my apartment being like

1:11:26Paige DeSorbo: leave me alone and going should i put more tanning oil on you sicko you sicko um i've literally been

1:11:33Hannah Berner: spending too much time in jersey i'm just like sorry i'm trying to fit in sorry i want the girls to like me i'm like hello oh my god you have to smell what is it it's does it have like scent it smells amazing yeah it smells like nuts it's the best thing ever joy and wine drop i mean it's just like i'm like guys i'm so sorry that you're getting such heat right now they need a new prd but my tanning one they need something like i mean it did have a little spf no basically i was a rotisserie chicken out there and i loved every fucking second of it

1:12:11Paige DeSorbo: um we love you guys so much thank you for giggling with us and we'll talk to you next week bye

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