Giggling about soft smiles, summer reading, and running

0:02Paige DeSorbo: What's up gigglers?

0:03Hannah Berner: Gary, fix your wi-fi.

0:05Paige DeSorbo: Manifest that shit.

0:06Hannah Berner: We can't be managed.

0:11Hannah Berner: I mean the day just got away from me.

0:16Paige DeSorbo: Hello my gigglies.

0:22Paige DeSorbo: We're back. We're back. I did just wake up from a nap. Yeah. So I think that's why I'm a little, my mouth's a little sore.

0:32Hannah Berner: And we talked a little in the beginning to get Hannah warmed up. Now we do exercises. Now we do red leather, yellow leather. Seashells by the seashore. Hannah's about to start her show. So we're in it. Yeah. You want to know what? I feel like a lot of people were like, what's the vibe of the summer? What's the song of the summer? What's the saying of the summer for the gigglers? Sorry, we're having an intense summer because Hannah can't move her face. Not only is she working with no movement, but we have to keep abreast on what's going on.

1:12Paige DeSorbo: I declare it right now. It's soft smile summer.

1:19Paige DeSorbo: Hell yeah, it is. I've changed who I am. I'm an ice queen. I don't smile at anyone. I don't laugh at anyone. Nothing's funny. um and look i do have to say thank you for all the feedback from the pod i'm still getting it i'm like refreshing youtube and reading all the comments the one thing i didn't think was gonna hurt my feelings that did is i'm getting a lot of people calling me kira knightley why would that hurt your feelings because it means my jaw is not moving and i look like this and i'm like gonna lock jaw she's gorgeous but i can be my jaw you are kind of giving a little bit british okay i actually was so excited to see you today because i thought i was gonna hop on and you're gonna be like it looks so much better you look so good but the problem with page is she's brutally honest with me to the point that yesterday i sent her a photo of myself and didn't get a response and then said made a joke like sorry i look ugly i know you hate when i look ugly and she was like

2:19Hannah Berner: thanks for ruining my night what about today when i was like you sent me a meme about how like your friend can't take anything serious and i was like this is me for the next six months and you were

2:31Paige DeSorbo: like six i'm very fragile right now you can't make those jokes no i know no i know no i know and it's not funny i know women is stem of the week yeah not my injector

2:54Hannah Berner: i'll take her over in my segment

3:09Hannah Berner: and it's not funny and it's not i've gotten like a wide variety

3:15Paige DeSorbo: of people reaching out being like hey you'll be good in three weeks and then some people who are like hey like it took it took it's it took me 10 months it's still a thing but it's like rare like

3:26Hannah Berner: not all the okay well when's the last time you went and had it done before this time excuse you sorry because it was a serious moment and I had to ruin it

3:44Paige DeSorbo: could you not just could you do anything seriously could you everything's a fucking joke to you some people are fighting for their life right now you're making little hiccups cute little hiccups

4:02Hannah Berner: oh my god I was just laughing so hard i almost start drooling some of us are just naturally drooling because they can't

4:12Paige DeSorbo: oh okay so i got it last time october yeah i don't even remember when it went away because

4:17Hannah Berner: i don't know like i didn't know what was going on october and you got it in june okay okay okay I have to also give an apology

4:32Paige DeSorbo: aren't you dealing with enough right now who are you apologizing to I was saying everything was going well in my life at last pod and I listed a bunch of things then people were messaging me they were like why didn't you say your marriage what's going on in your marriage okay I don't want you but like I'm not having like crazy ups and downs in my marriage where I'm like we had a good month this month thank god like sorry we don't think of him we don't it's not part of my day-to-day like drama thank god right but then also and then he was like why didn't you say like i was there to help you because like des has been my rock i've put all my anxiety into him i've been calling him he's been so positive with me except he also was like oh no like i had testicular cancer do you have some he's like oh you have both your parents still he's like oh did you not tear your acl and it still it still hurts so that's why dating an older man he puts life

5:33Hannah Berner: into perspective i think the good thing about des is he does let you be he does let you feel sorry for yourself the allotted time that is healthy to feel sorry for yourself and then he makes you get

5:46Paige DeSorbo: it together yeah and like he's making me laugh which is making it worse but anyway how are you

5:52Hannah Berner: i'm good i'm i texted hannah and i was like do you actually think we could do the pod tomorrow because i'm in the trenches of packing nighttime outfits packed daytime outfits packed got it skin hair, makeup, packed. I just have to do bathing suits and cover-ups, shoes, jewelry, accessories, hats. How do you pack hats? I just stuff them. I stuff them in there. And then I like if something happens to them and they get fucked up, I try and like reshape them wherever I am.

6:28Paige DeSorbo: Because I can see you going for some hat looks this summer.

6:32Hannah Berner: I have one ridiculous hat look that I'm just like, where am I even wearing this? But I'm not one of those people that wears their hats on the plane. Like, I can do it in my carry-on, but I'm not wearing it on the plane. I'm not insane.

6:48Paige DeSorbo: I judge people's hats. Like, if they're going to wear it, I'm like, that's the one you wore. That's the one you're saving.

6:53Hannah Berner: Okay, well, here's the other thing. I never lose things, and I'm missing one of my straw hats. And I'm just like... Farmer Paige.

7:07Paige DeSorbo: i hate losing things you would hate my life it's been a mile in these louboutins no i could never do it i don't even know where my louboutins are because i don't have them and i lost them no i have like a running list of things in my head that i'm like i need to check in on that

7:25Hannah Berner: because i haven't seen it in a while like i have a rotating thing so like i know where everything

7:30Paige DeSorbo: is so you would never lose your wedding ring for two years no and not even try to look for it because you're like we'll deal with that later we'll wait till my mom finds it no no i couldn't

7:42Hannah Berner: i couldn't it would like ruin my day i have to like remind myself that it's things and they can't love you back and so it's like if it goes it goes oh yeah i forgot you're in like a toy story situation i have like my own stuff that i need to work out but in the midst of packing missed no you said it right oh missed but you really hit every every consonant somehow in the midst of my packing i was watching the dallas cowboy cheerleaders sweetheart i don't even i never know what the name of the show is yeah you know what i'm talking about mormon wives

8:21Paige DeSorbo: secret yeah yeah housewives mormon religion i'm a secret cowboys dallas island love no because

8:31Hannah Berner: why does netflix give every show an insane name and like reality shows specifically it's like i don't need a thesis for the name of the show give me like like give me og laguna beach okay got it i don't need la confidential secret society

8:50Paige DeSorbo: hot wives la nannies yeah whatever that yeah they're that's so true they put a full imdb page

8:58Hannah Berner: in the title anyway so i'm watching the dallas cheerleaders and like i didn't watch the show like when it was on tv maybe i saw like a couple episodes but there are just like certain things that you're like yeah i'm gonna let it slide because like they're in dallas like what it what are we doing you know like i'm enjoying the show then it gets to a part where the main girl okay now she became the main girl essentially because when you were watching her on tv you were like captivated mesmerized dare I say she had the sauce she was an incredible dancer she's gorgeous like I don't think I've ever said this phrase in my life but sweetest pie like just the cutest sweet like everything she ends up becoming like somewhat the face of the show in the past three years that it's been on netflix at the end of this season she decides that she's not going to come back for the not going to come back for the next year she's like turning in her uniform she just got married last year oh they have their boyfriends in it too sometimes some of their like husbands or boyfriends are in it now when she's deciding if she's gonna come back for the next year she gets hurt and her boyfriend says something while she's sitting on the couch that i was just like oh that's like so interesting and I'm trying to think if like my significant other said said that to me in that moment would I be pissed so now mind you she's an athlete she hurts herself

10:26Paige DeSorbo: she's wants to finish out the year I love how you're like would you start a fight let me tell

10:31Hannah Berner: you the scenario yes and he goes selfishly I'm kind of happy because I get to spend more time with you I don't hate it okay I don't hate it because I was literally dealing with that just now

10:45Paige DeSorbo: with my mouth situation just to bring it back to me because you you didn't ask me about it the last two minutes no but this is a good no this is good I was like if I lose a cut if if I like don't travel and I'm not like working right right I get to spend more time with my family

11:04Hannah Berner: right okay but what you're about to do you just found out about two months ago yeah what this girl is doing she worked your it would be like if you were in playing tennis and it was like the final year your senior year you hurt yourself and your boyfriend's like fuck it we can like

11:23Paige DeSorbo: sit on the couch together i think he was trying to find the positivity in the situation I wouldn't like if you turned it into like you're never around and like I hate it let me give you

11:34Hannah Berner: more to the story he actually quit his job because her fame got so big overnight that like she's now all of a sudden like a Netflix star and I'm sure she's getting brand deals and whatever she quits she worked at a florist shop adorable I mean I can't she quits her job she's like doing influencing full-time on the side. I don't know if people actually worked at florist shops. I thought that was just in movies. I think she, like, volunteered, too. I'm like, she's a made-up person. She's a butterfly catcher. She makes rainbows. No, she's, like, literally perfect. He quits his job to help her for whatever reason they can't make it work.

12:19Hannah Berner: it seems like she got really big the whole country was watching her she blows up into like this instagram influencer this like netflix star she gets obviously inevitably a lot of hate along with a lot of love i don't think she was expecting as much hate i think it really did something to her she was like i work at a flower shop right rather and like what are you hating on her for rather than kind of like persevering through it she was basically like i think i might take a step back and she had just got only been married for a year but i can't help but think he was scared or he didn't want her to continue to grow with her fame or like whatever and he didn't want her to do the show anymore and he didn't want her to be on the team anymore i also could be making this up You could be fully projecting.

13:13Hannah Berner: I could. But he went on a pod and he said her dream wasn't to be a Netflix star. Her dream was to be on the cheerleading team. And then he was asked a question like what were his thoughts on the cheerleaders like getting a raise. And he was like no comment.

13:27Paige DeSorbo: No you're right. Look. Has your intuition ever been wrong? Never. Why would I steer you in a different direction? I need to say did he leave a banana peel on the floor for her to trip? like was he did he injure her I can't prove it yet but if you give me some time and a sharpie I could figure something out give me a whiteboard and we'll be there in about 20 minutes um no looking at that perspective him not working and then like commenting on like how much money the girls are making and also like yeah you don't go on a podcast unless you've done something

14:09Hannah Berner: well also a lot of the girls obviously had to have second jobs because they were making nothing and i think still have to have second jobs they're making a little bit more and now in today's day and age they can supplement with being influencers and like take a little bit of a rest except the two coaches don't love the influencing yeah which i'm like get with the top like i know but it's like then pay me what this brand deal is gonna pay me well they give we struggled because the coaches were both on the team the vibe they give is we struggled we had to deal with it so do you like that's the energy it gives and it's like okay well that would then what's the point of women helping women what's the word um when everything's more expensive over time inflation

14:58Paige DeSorbo: period yeah also just because it was fucked up in the past doesn't mean it has to be fucked up now i still haven't gotten myself to watch it because i i can tell i'm gonna get pissed off i think for

15:10Hannah Berner: me why i was like triggered by it is because i am someone that can also get down and be like maybe i shouldn't even do this because everyone's gonna hate it and like i can't really do it and i need to be with someone that's like what the hell are you talking about like go just try it go do it like whatever if i had someone that was like yeah this is really scary maybe you shouldn't

15:33Paige DeSorbo: it would i couldn't i couldn't do what did he do for a living before that's an excellent question

15:38Hannah Berner: i want to say he like worked at like a hardware store i hate to do this but if the roles were reversed and like he was a normal guy got on this netflix show blew up none of these guys are staying with like the girls who like love them for them right like i always you know who i always think about anna faris and chris um pine no pratt i just always think of like men who like have blown up

16:06Paige DeSorbo: and then left their wives not to feed into horrible rumors online yes because i would never we would never but people are like coming for rihanna and asap rocky's relationship right now have you seen no what are they saying i guess he like went on stage and talked about like how girls in phoenix are beautiful or something and like i don't know met gala people thought they

16:29Hannah Berner: were fighting i saw met gala people thought they were fighting and people have turned people are

16:35Paige DeSorbo: like rihanna get out interesting but it also makes me think like how quiet she's been in her career I like never I mean she's a billionaire and running Fenty and doing amazing but like in terms of her art I always wonder like I don't know well can I say something that I've actually never really liked him because one time I saw a clip like I've liked his songs before but like a couple years

17:02Hannah Berner: ago this is maybe like four or five I actually have no idea three or four years ago I saw a clip of him on a podcast and it was like i forget whose it was and i don't even remember what they were talking about i want to say it was like in regards to like him modeling but it was he said something like oh well i should get taken shopping because i'm so good looking or like yeah i think it was like around when like those videos with like laurie harvey when she was like talking about how she's the prize then like his resurfaced i think that's when i saw it and you you hate that and i was just like what no like this is oh my god i saw a clip the other day you know the we met at acme i love that girl she had some guy on her podcast and he was like here's a tip for the girls like go up to guys at a bar and like buy him a drink and i'm like over my dead fucking body why don't i open the door for him as well pull out his chair and then buy the dinner like no no we're not we we're not throwing him off one night and just like going on being like hey let me

18:16Paige DeSorbo: buy you every time you approach a man you can get murdered so why would i also pay to get murdered

18:22Hannah Berner: Also my makeup costs more than this drink My outfit costs more than this drink Like I don't need you to buy the drink It's not about the money It's about the gesture If I needed someone to buy me a drink I wouldn't be standing in a bar That'd be insane I can't afford it Why would I be there? Like the men have really literally lost it

18:45Paige DeSorbo: But yeah we have no idea what's actually going on With any of the celebrity relationships But it is so fun to take a clip And be like this is what's going on

18:52Hannah Berner: Yeah, I love it. Hannah and I are always on the go. And the number one thing Hannah likes to do when I say I'm hungry is offer me a bar. A David protein bar, to be specific. David's Hero Protein Bar has 28 grams of protein, 150 calories, and zero grams of sugar. Each gold bar features an indulgent, doughy texture, studded with satisfying chucks and air crisps. Their bronze new bar is still high in protein with even more decadence. It's 20 grams of protein, 150 calories, and zero grams of sugar. Each bronze bar features a smooth, decadent marshmallow base with a flavor-filled layering, airy, crisp, and chocolate-flavored coating.

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20:10Hannah Berner: Christian Polisic, David Beckham, Thierry Henry, Alfonso Davies, and everyone's favorite purple player grimace the girlies are collecting all nine and that is final order the fifa world cup meal at mcdonald's all tournament long this summer and see which legend you get there are nine cups total so you have a very good excuse to keep going back we will be there every week at participating mcdonald's for a limited time while supplies last all rights reserved 2026 mcdonald's at fifa world cup 2026 okay i need to talk about sephora because if you're looking for the newest hottest beauty products they are only at sephora and you guys know i love finding the products everyone is about to become obsessed with before they completely sell out like the one size liquid blotting paper spray unreal it's the first of its kind blotting spray that mattifies for up to eight hours i'm also deeply attached to the summer fridays shade drops spf 50 because it somehow makes you look effortlessly put together even when your life is not and don't even get me started on the keali fragrances i wore keali eden blush pair the other day and three separate people asked me what i was wearing it has become my entire personality what i love is sephora makes it so easy to discover your next favorite makeup skincare hair or fragrance product all in one place especially the products everyone's talking about right now So if you want to stay ahead of the beauty group chat, shop the newest, hottest beauty products only at Sephora.

21:43Paige DeSorbo: And then Taylor and Trev, the wedding's coming up. There's murmurs, but they're doing a great job at... Keeping it quiet? Apparently, I think they haven't sent anyone information, which is so funny. Did you get the wedding blues? Was it before or after? It's after. Oh, no, I had after my wedding. I was like, thank God nothing went wrong. Everything was fun. Everyone had fun. Photos were great. I feel amazing. People were like, once it's over, it's like you've nothing to look forward to. Like for me, first of all, also that right, I wasn't looking forward to it like it was the best day of my life.

22:26Paige DeSorbo: And second of all, I was like, just so happy it went well.

22:31Hannah Berner: And I had such I was just like grateful. do you think taylor swift is gonna like have the wedding blues or do you think she's like this is like a great day but it's not the best day of my life i think she'll feel that way but i mean i do think she's like a little more romantic than me like i think she cares about

22:48Paige DeSorbo: the wedding more than me she's a little and i'm not trying to be like pick me like like you can remember weddings i'm chill no it's more just like i actually didn't like the attention of like when I force people to come to an event yeah like I like people want to come to see me like do stand up not like cousins being there being like we had to drive from the airport I don't know like that's just what I'm thinking like it's like inviting people to a dinner for your birthday I'm like these people are busy do they want to be here like that's my own issue yeah you know so wedding is like that times 100 also it is nerve-wracking like I got nervous when I was

23:29Hannah Berner: walking down the aisle of course i cried when you walked down the aisle oh i forgot you were there

23:38Paige DeSorbo: is this because i was mean to you this morning in dms no it's just i have a mental illness where

23:43Hannah Berner: like i don't know who was with me at any time yeah well also i feel like you like black out at your wedding yeah like me and you didn't talk no you don't talk to people you know at your

23:53Paige DeSorbo: wedding can we talk about mindy kaling oh my god okay everyone needs to watch not suitable for work do we want to tell them from date the day one how this how we got involved we got an email we got an email from yeah from the mindy kaling and i i was just like oh my god obviously we're

24:18Hannah Berner: doing this and it was right before thanksgiving right i thought it was spam i was like mindy

24:22Paige DeSorbo: Kaylee didn't write us an email. Okay, is she asking for 500 grand also to send to a foreign country?

24:29Hannah Berner: Was this before Thanksgiving or before Christmas?

24:32Paige DeSorbo: I have no recollection of time.

24:34Hannah Berner: I want to say it was right before one of the holidays.

24:39Paige DeSorbo: Well, the problem with TV, not the problem, but like you shoot something and then it's like years before it comes out.

24:46Hannah Berner: Anyway, so we go and we like kind, yeah, we like kind of had lines. and Hannah had one.

24:57Paige DeSorbo: Wait, I was about to say, I feel like I was well behaved during this and I didn't do anything wrong. Nevermind, continue.

25:04Hannah Berner: And here's the thing. When we get there, we're like obviously so giddy, so excited. This was production's last day of filming. So like every single person was like, and this is the last day and we're finally done. And like we're - We came in, we were like, hi nice to meet everyone how are you honestly it felt like we came in at the end of a reality show and everyone was already like fighting and hated each other and we were like what's going on here

25:32Paige DeSorbo: tell us about yourself honestly the cast the crew everyone was so sweet it just was like they were wrapping up like they were like thank god it's the last day and page were like so where do we stand nice to meet you but what was the old lang syne okay which is crazy because now i'll never forget it ever so mind you page is really good at memorization i'm not and but we were in our trailer practicing our little asses off like we were like again again like russian gymnastic coaches i was like no you

26:12Hannah Berner: then finally i was like okay we got it and then i just hear hannah like doing it to herself like inner oh my god you get like it's the first time okay here's the thing acting with you is the first time i ever see you double check your work that's the way i can describe it like anything else we do like giggly squad interview podcast hosting you're like we got this like

26:39Paige DeSorbo: not i like you're not even worried you should double check your work which calm no which calms

26:44Hannah Berner: me down yeah then like we went into a setting like that you're like let me just practice one time and then that makes me nervous because I'm like wait you you're unsure about yourself

26:54Paige DeSorbo: who's driving the ship yeah I'm like no no no no you can't be unsure it was okay can we try to do one more thing we were doing good and I was like we're gonna crush this like we were vibing my last line or the last page i'm basically it's about we're celebrating um old lang syne we're celebrating new year's eve yeah and i have to say the word old lang syne mind you i don't know where i've been my entire life never heard this before and everyone's like you know the song that like and Hannah's like she had been born four hours and was like no I've lived on this

27:43Hannah Berner: earth my entire life I've never heard the name of that song obviously Des who's born in the

27:47Paige DeSorbo: fucking 80s was like how the fuck do you not know what old lang syne is and I'm like I can't talk to you right now so then for some reason like you know when you can't remember a word because you don't know what it is also everyone kept going old lang syne I'm like this I've never heard this word you guys are making this word up you're making it up and then they're like playing the song for me and i'm like yeah i know that song no one calls it old lang syne no one's ever called anything in front of me so i'm like wait plus we're in like it's supposed to look like we're outside but like we're not and so we're in like furs and hannah's i'm in a fur with with a uh what is it called earmuffs for earmuffs inside and i'm sweating i'm feeling it hannah and i have

28:35Hannah Berner: this joke that like every time we get our makeup done like no matter what we're doing like 10 minutes later hannah like doesn't have any makeup on

28:46Paige DeSorbo: you'll see the raw pink skin on my face like a like a new chicken

28:55Paige DeSorbo: i have really like slippery skin

29:06Paige DeSorbo: when we're on tour by the second show page is like did you just wake up in the morning like

29:12Hannah Berner: where is anything you put on your face why is that has anyone what primer are you do you use no really no i don't use i don't use it well there we go there we go well first of all we meet ashanti oh yeah only you so tiny in person by ashanti everyone needs to listen to right now oh i thought you were saying to like no the song only you like only page i can't wait

29:44Paige DeSorbo: to get next to you uh i just can't leave you alone maybe when the mouth is yeah that was just because that wasn't because of my extra singing voice no right right right right we know i'm the songbird of our generation so ashanti put her in my pocket um we come on i'm like ashanti we're obsessed with you we love you so much and in my head i'm like do not up in front of ashanti Mindy Kaling's entire production Yeah And Paige who already is doubting you It was one of those lines Where like it's like kind of long And old lang syne Was the last word So I would do this monologue and then get to it And like you know when your brain just short circuits And I'd be like zing lang syne

30:29Hannah Berner: No You were literally having an adult da zim Like you were It was like We would say it back to each other like old lang zine and she was oh and we got it and then she'd do the whole thing like she couldn't just do that part she had to do it in its entirety and it was

30:58Hannah Berner: here's the other thing well why how we're different when you mess up or like get embarrassed by something you're which i find so fascinating you're louder like you you call more attention to yourself almost as if to be like look at how much i fucked up everyone should see this you like like ultimate humiliation where i if i fuck up or like i do something silence i've actually slipped into the back of the crowd like you've never seen me again like i'm running away

31:32Paige DeSorbo: I'm leaving I feel like that's a stand-up comic in me to like say what you're feeling like yeah just be outward about the moment but like it wasn't a scene of me and Paige like we had real actors on set and a director so then how many times do you think I messed it up

31:50Hannah Berner: oh I mean we had to have done it at least 15 times right 15 to 20 times I would say here's the other thing that like that like you don't people don't realize you're doing it you're doing it 10 to 15 times from one angle then you're doing it another 10 to 15 times from another

32:12Paige DeSorbo: it's a whole thing it's so funny i like forgot that happened like i blocked it out that's how i deal with humiliation i'm just like um yeah that wasn't me that's actually probably really healthy yeah i'm not like wait it's not keeping me up at night i'm like oldling zions are crazy That's not English, so that's not my fault that I couldn't learn a new language day of.

32:34Hannah Berner: I'm getting a cyst pimple on my chin, which is like ruining my whole trip.

32:40Paige DeSorbo: I'm the wrong person for you to complain about that too right now, but I totally support you. But I would trade bodies in a second if I could.

32:50Hannah Berner: Yeah, so let's talk about it. Like, you're starting tomorrow, and what did anyone say?

32:56Paige DeSorbo: um okay i i showed up honestly i'm getting better at not smiling that's my problem because before i was like just smile push through and now i'm just a nice queen did you tell nana i told nana but not like i didn't send her any photos she's kind of like you yeah you can't send her ugly pictures

33:21Hannah Berner: or she's like why would you put this on my phone why they just attacked me why'd you put this on

33:29Paige DeSorbo: my phone i just had an old memory pop up i'll actually will put in the newsletter of nana at my wedding doing an outfit check and she's literally telling every single thing she's wearing like down to the earrings she's so fucking cute remember that day she couldn't wear heels and she was pissed because she had like done something to her foot yeah she was like fully injured and

33:51Hannah Berner: she was upset i think she was still wearing kitten heel yeah how are we related yeah she was wearing

33:58Paige DeSorbo: a little wedge and she was like apologizing to everyone she was like i'm so sorry that i'm wearing

34:03Hannah Berner: these disgusting little wedges she's like i don't know if you've noticed but i look like a clown

34:12Hannah Berner: it honestly i like i felt so bad because i was like i know i know that you can't even enjoy the day because you're livid like i get it everyone's staring at these gross ass little wedges

34:26Paige DeSorbo: meanwhile i like can't brush my hair oh also does the specials out you watched oh my god

34:33Hannah Berner: that's what i meant to bring up to you it's so good yeah i have some gigglers messaging me they

34:42Paige DeSorbo: were like they were like because you love him we love him that's the only reason we're supporting

34:47Hannah Berner: but we had we really enjoyed the special no it was so funny i was so proud of him well you texted

34:54Paige DeSorbo: it's funny you texted us in the group chat and in my head i was like if they texted alone that That would be like black magic would start happening. Like, I feel like you guys actually are scared of like if you two actually put your heads together to like cast a spell on someone. Let me see if I texted him.

35:13Hannah Berner: Oh, you know what it was? I DMed him. Yeah. On my own. And then, yeah, texted it in the group. Yeah. No, texting like your friend's husband alone. it feels like when like hr like calls you you're like wait how do you have my number and also like

35:31Paige DeSorbo: no this is scary if someone's boyfriend's texting me if it's not about a ring i don't want to be

35:38Hannah Berner: involved yeah don't involve me actually my friend katie her husband did um like live updates while she was in giving labor giving a birth live up having a baby to who like was doing them to all of her friends so like put everyone in like a big group chat it was just doing like live updates

36:01Paige DeSorbo: wait that's hilarious that i appreciated was he good at like giving details yeah he did fall off quite quickly because i'm like that's not doesn't sound like a good job for him i'm like give it to the mom give it to the aunt give it to a gen z cousin no he did a good job because he is quite funny so um they were like cute little paragraphs but anyway we also have an update um the nun podcast dm'd us stop sisters of mary op and they sent us the sweetest message they said of course imagine they sent a really bitchy message they go next time tag a bitch imagine two nuns were like

36:45Hannah Berner: hey you fucking twats they go our culture is not your costume we're not praying for you

36:52Paige DeSorbo: you're off of the pray party so they said hey thanks for tagging us in your video it was a delightful take on your podcast a delightful take i need to say delightful more in my everyday

37:04Hannah Berner: jargon.

37:05Paige DeSorbo: She goes, I love that we share a real love of laughter. You wouldn't believe how much we laughed. Okay, maybe you would. Obsessed with them. They're hilarious. I'm obsessed. Let's just say the podcast is true to life. It runs deep in our tradition. This is good for the gigglers. It's good to know that nuns know us. She basically said, laugh to your heart's content. You've broken free from evil. Laughter is the right response. And ever since then, we take the chance to laugh for every good reason um may your days be filled with genuine lobster that comes from knowing god's love thank you sisters of mary that is the sweetest i think they just blessed us i know is that so nice bless you like that was a bless is your mom's gonna be so happy my mom's gonna be she's like you're going to heaven now the sisters of mary do you know that my mom and dad watch our

38:01Hannah Berner: podcast every night while they watch dinner or while they eat dinner they watch it on youtube no i'm gonna cry i go mom but it's only two times a week so what are you doing the other nights and she goes well we watch the same one until the new one comes

38:17Paige DeSorbo: i love you guys are sick i love them so much also meanwhile your brother's like hey i'm here

38:30Hannah Berner: she's like well we don't like anything else on tv and we just put one to you guys

38:35Paige DeSorbo: oh so i love how they're probably numb to me like in the beginning they were like i'm not sure about her and now they're like oh hannah's the sweetest kindest most innocent girl

38:46Hannah Berner: we've ever met she doesn't mean anything my dad will call me and he'll be like you know you just like sit there and you just laugh at everything hannah says you just think she's i've never seen you laugh at anyone you just think everything she says is funny i'm like because it is okay

39:06Paige DeSorbo: sorry for laughing with my friend sorry the sisters of mary told us that it was a good to laugh because then it gets evil away we literally are curing evil spirits yeah we are

39:20Hannah Berner: giggling in bed brought to you by mattress firm summer is here and if you're a hot sleeper this time of year is genuinely brutal you're already warm you're outside more you're doing more and then you finally get into bed at night exhausted and instead of actually recovering you wake up at 3 a.m. trunched in sweat feeling like you ran a half marathon in your sleep and you just kind of accept that this is your life like this is simply who i am as a person now but here's the thing and I genuinely did not know this for a long time, a lot of common sleep problems actually come down to your mattress.

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41:21Paige DeSorbo: Also, I posted a stand-up. One of my favorite jokes from the stand-up special was making fun of guys going down on you.

41:28Hannah Berner: Yeah.

41:29Paige DeSorbo: And to make sure guys go down on you early because you learn about who they are as a person when they're going down on you. And I say, like, if a guy, if you don't know how to get him to go down on you, I say you should just push his head down. do you remember that being a thing yes you're like still is no i remember it being like a

41:49Hannah Berner: like a controversy like i remember girls talking about i remember girls saying like and then he pushed my head and another girl being like are you kidding me like i think it's so

42:02Paige DeSorbo: feminist to push a guy's head yeah lightly nicely but like to be like and no kissy kissy that's hilarious but um at the end the end joke i basically it ends with a period joke and i was looking through the comic comments and sometimes the posts hit like just these random men and these men the comments are so funny like guys i really get the biggest kick out of it this guy goes girl comics all they do is start with sex and then end about their periods and i was like that is so fucking true steve like basically how every girl comic talks about sex and their periods and then this one bit i posted was like all of it so this guy's head was like exploding he's like she talks about sex and her period in one joke what the fuck god forbid we talk about what we know i was like i talked about my husband's dead parents in the last clip so i i do have range So how dare you?

43:00Paige DeSorbo: How dare you? Take it up with him.

43:02Hannah Berner: Do you get sad when I go to Italy for two weeks? Like, just knowing that I'm like, if something were to happen, you can't get to me? Great question.

43:13Paige DeSorbo: I love how you're trying to instill anxiety. Like I am far away. I've never been more anxious than when you were in Fiji, which is really weird because it was before that thing happened to you. But I just remember looking at my phone, Googling Fiji, and it was the middle of the ocean. And I was like, do they have like Dunkin Donuts? Like, are you OK? No, I had to go home. But you going to Italy, I honestly feel like I like live vicariously through you. Like, I feel like I'm about to go to Italy. Like, I'm like, what are we wearing? What like send me the food? Like, and I don't have to deal with any logistics.

43:48Hannah Berner: And that's how I felt when you were in Sports Illustrated. I was like, and now I don't have to prep for that. You didn't have to do this.

43:56Paige DeSorbo: That's literally how I feel. I'm going to have to pack. I'm going to have to find boats. I don't have to get hotel reservations. I have to sit and wait in line for things. But I get to see all the fun of it all. And then it's going to be so fun when you get on the phone. You'll be like, I just had a gelato. I'm excited for that.

44:13Hannah Berner: That's so funny because I texted my dad yesterday. And I said, Dad, I think we're going to get more ice cream in the middle of the day this year.

44:20Paige DeSorbo: Oh, yeah. I was going to say compared to you because now this is like your third or fourth yeah like similar trip I love that you guys are like this works we're doing it again what are you what are you changing what do you think you could do better this year that you've done in previous years

44:34Hannah Berner: besides different invites I'm assuming I actually think I could eat more because okay here's like one of the one of the ways my anxiety also like manifests yeah if everyone's like dinner at 7 p.m. like okay everyone's going back to their room getting ready for dinner like oh my god I've been hungry all day I didn't eat lunch or late because I wanted to be hungry for dinner right when I sit down to dinner not hungry like can't eat when I'm told you have to eat like I rather go back I rather sit at dinner not eat go back to my room order room service eat yeah like I don't know why that

45:16Paige DeSorbo: happens to me I have the opposite I sit down at dinner and I'm like I'm so hungry and ravenous I I'm gonna embarrass everyone around me by how hungry and how fast I'm gonna eat this food and I wish I could be normal and not shove this entire pancetta in my mouth well Italy really is the

45:34Hannah Berner: perfect place for you because if you don't eat your whole plate so like then it's stressful when I'm not hungry and I'm not eating because then they take offense to it and they come over and they're like what's going on like you didn't like it like i'll bring you something no no they show

45:48Paige DeSorbo: up with a fucking gun and they say what happened yeah and so i'm like they're literally holding me

45:54Hannah Berner: with a knife like i'm like i don't i'm like i have anxiety and like here's the thing like everyone's eating and i if everyone's eating then i can't they're like was the sauce not the perfect because it's the best sauce in all italy so i'm going into this trip mentally telling myself yourself you're eating when it's time for dinner you but I don't think that's gonna work that's

46:19Paige DeSorbo: not gonna work you can't just tell yourself to do it what you have to do is not make a big deal

46:22Hannah Berner: about it okay act nonchalant about it yes like like like you're about to pet a cat so not worry about what time I'm eating lunch because in case I'm not hungry for dinner but it doesn't matter

46:33Paige DeSorbo: if you start obsessing over like being ready to eat the second you get there your body's gonna be

46:40Hannah Berner: like this is what we were stressed about well i think it's also because of course of course i have this like weird thing where i can't go to the bathroom when i'm on vacation so like i'm backed up for a couple of days i didn't want to factor that in yeah so i think it's like a lot but it's only it's only ever on vacation actually no sometimes like on tour were you backed up well we had other no but sometimes if i'm going out for like a saturday night and i'm going out with like four couples i'm like i'm not hungry but if i'm going out just like myself hungry

47:15Paige DeSorbo: it's crazy though because when i when i rarely can't eat i get so embarrassed like yesterday on set i was like obviously a little nervous and they brought me food and i tried to eat and i couldn't eat and then afterwards people came in and i like hadn't eaten and i i like had to say something i was like i'm sorry i ate a lot of mashed potatoes like

47:37Hannah Berner: we could our lives are so different like where where were you eating mashed potatoes prior to

47:51Paige DeSorbo: they had brought me like a thing of mashed potatoes and all this meat and like whatever and i didn't eat any of the meat but i did eat mashed potatoes and i was like there was actually a lot of like i was trying to explain to these people that i ate more than it looked and then one thing that i've learned no one gives a fuck about what's going on with you no one gives a fuck i'm walking around with no fucking smile no one's noticed no one's noticed everyone's

48:17Hannah Berner: worried about their own shit no one cares no one cares no one cares that's another part of anxiety like oh my god everybody's looking at me everyone thinks i look like soup no one gives a shit they're all worried about their own shit they're in their own head thinking the same thing you're thinking

48:34Paige DeSorbo: but then something like old lang syne i'm like everyone's like you should know what that is well what if you went there and said i know i'm not gonna eat i know i'm not gonna eat at this place i've done i've tried that you've tried yeah well it's now it's become a thing um even it's

48:50Hannah Berner: become a thing even to the point where my mom's like i'll push the reservation so now we go to

48:56Paige DeSorbo: dinner at like 8 p.m to make sure that you can like eat a little might not be hungry yet yeah yeah yeah yeah but you know what it's a beautiful problem to have it's that you're in

49:08Hannah Berner: italy should we eat the pesto now eat it later so my thing is i'm just gonna eat all day and say yeah and fuck it i don't care i'm just eating when i want to eat i do think also vacations having like

49:22Paige DeSorbo: set times to eat with a group is fucking stressful well this year I told my mom to leave like a

49:28Hannah Berner: couple days where there's no dinner reservations because sometimes it's too much like you literally I'm like I'll actually throw up if I put another thing in my mouth yeah and it's also like becomes

49:42Paige DeSorbo: like a military operation when it's like and then we go back and then we shower and then we come back out and then we change then we go shower again and then we sleep and then we wake up the menu is the same every single place what is the menu it's just like pastas and it just says pasta like

50:00Hannah Berner: seafoods and like but it's like the sit you get the vibe like i literally get linguine like linguine clam ravioli there's gnocchi there's spaghetti there's everything yeah obsessed whatever i'm so excited i'm really excited i got a new book and i'm excited to read my book and I'm excited to talk to my mom. Tell the club what the book is. Oh, it's called Magnolia Park. And a girl DM'd me and was like, it's big. It's a big book. How big are the words? We'll see. But she was like, it's about socialites in London and it's like chic and cool and I feel like you would like it. And so I'm going to try it.

50:42Hannah Berner: And I'm giving my mom, I finished Strangers. I'm giving that to my mom for her to read on the trip. Wait, my mom read it too. yeah we're just like i love being in a book club that's so fun i really enjoy reading recently it's just like wait what have you read since the first one that's it

51:08Paige DeSorbo: i read all the text messages

51:14Paige DeSorbo: I didn't see you going to Barnes & Noble, taking a book, reading the back of it, and being like, I love reading.

51:23Paige DeSorbo: I love books. They're so pretty.

51:30Paige DeSorbo: Bonus of the week, I didn't know that Lisa Barlow has a song out. What is it? Gorgeous, baby gorgeous. Wait, I haven't seen it. Well, I posted a photo of me not smiling in this Uber, and the song was recommended, and I pressed it, and it was cute. And I thought this is no hate, no tea, no shade. I love Taylor Swift. I'm a Swifty. I thought it was a Taylor Swift song.

51:55Hannah Berner: No way. Wait, I need to play it now. She has, like, a, like, nice voice.

52:01Paige DeSorbo: Like, yeah, it's autotune and stuff. Which housewife doesn't autotune? Like, let's stop. Who's Charlie fucking XCX is autotuning. Don't get mad at Lisa Barlow. but like it was low-key i thought it was like kind of a bop nice yeah you love me sabarla right yeah i'm gonna look out for that i think you guys should look out for that um what is pissing

52:21Hannah Berner: you off this week honestly i didn't have anything piss me off really this week other than like the

52:26Paige DeSorbo: usual wait did i tell you speaking of you reading do you know i woke up this morning and i ran on the treadmill oh you're going through i do triathlons now no i'm in a dark really

52:43Paige DeSorbo: how long how far well i got there also this is a foreign i'm in a foreign country yeah i'm in toronto i'm in a foreign gym never been you know what like i like to go to a gym that like i've scooped out before i know where the things are i go into this gym blind thank god There was no one at the treadmill. And I ran for like 10 minutes at like five and a half, which I thought was really good. Walked. Then LL Cool J Head Sprung came on. That got me through another 10 minutes on and off. Try some 12-3-30. I just feel like I need – I want to sweat more faster. And then I did it. And I actually felt really good about myself.

53:28Paige DeSorbo: But also I felt like weird. like why are you doing this but i was like i have to sweat this out and then as i'm walking some man was like hey i loved your special and i was like i'm really like vulnerable at the gym right now i i can't smile right now i just got botox in the wrong place and i'm i don't feel good so besides getting accosted that's like never happened to me before and i don't know why those places types of places all the decor also like the floors everything's black and it just

54:04Hannah Berner: seems really depressing like why can't we make it like light situation there was lights it was nice

54:10Paige DeSorbo: but like why are gyms so dark like give me some i want like a pilates studio vibe where's the

54:19Hannah Berner: No, like let me run on a treadmill, but also like a sound bath be going like, yes.

54:26Paige DeSorbo: Wait, what's Palo Santo? Where's the Palo Santo? I've never said Palo Santo in my life. You guys, thank you so much for giggling. Thank you for helping me through a dark time. And everyone send Paige well wishes for her travels to Italy. thank you and we love you so much see ya bye

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