Giggling about testosterone, mullets, and spray tans

0:02Paige DeSorbo: What's up, gigglers?

0:03Hannah Berner: Harriet, fix the Wi-Fi.

0:05Paige DeSorbo: Manifest that shit.

0:06Hannah Berner: We can't be managed.

0:11Hannah Berner: I mean, the day just got away from me.

0:15Paige DeSorbo: Can I just say... What happened to hello? How are you? How are you? My Galileo gigglers.

0:22Hannah Berner: Thank you. Now proceed.

0:24Paige DeSorbo: I just want to give a shout out to LastPod. We started off with a news alert. yeah what was crazy is we had finished recording we put our podcast equipment down and the video was just playing and we were just chatting and i told grace like can you just cut that into a clip and you know it's crazy you couldn't tell if we were podcasting or not because like we're the same

0:51Hannah Berner: like i had something to be said about like our friendship can i tell you what i'm actually most pissed about in that like situation the engagement us weekly got from the gigglers they're not i can't wait for the follow-up about my utis they're gonna be in a staff meeting and be like number one article this week page to sorbo's uti my comment got 17 000 likes even when i say something funny i can't get that many likes and you want to know what's pissing me off the most about it was i was waiting until this episode to bring up that i went past my four month mark and have not gotten a uti

1:30Paige DeSorbo: but i don't want them writing a follow-up i think it deserves a follow-up because people are hanging on the edge of their seats right now about your utis and if you're gonna live or die um also us weekly um we have to next time tell the gigglers not to comment on their stuff because it it's like

1:47Hannah Berner: not only boost reward bad behavior no you can't i'm like guys can anyone like sleuthers see if

1:55Paige DeSorbo: page actually this is the problem i can't tell if you're right or not because you've lied since and told me you have a uti about certain times you literally this week lied to someone about a

2:06Hannah Berner: migraine okay i felt one coming on i how did you know about that i know everything i have eyes everywhere i have eyes everywhere that actually wasn't a lie i got off my flight and it was like my head hurts there was a chance of migraine who told you that that little rat when anything

2:28Paige DeSorbo: happens i know who told you i know anything happens to you they assume i either know i'm in on it or should know so anyway you're not alone in this life oh my god can't a girl just get a migraine once in a while you know also i have to set the stage for the giggler set the scene it's 10 p.m i'm in my daphne no pants ready to go to bed did get a spray tan so i'm feeling myself but page is in full glam had a full day in hollywood doing hollywood things i'm in my full daphne i got a spray tan yesterday yours is a little darker than mine okay so i went a little

3:10Hannah Berner: dark because i was like it has to last till sunday i'm obsessed with this woman she was she was an artist she wasn't a spray tan person she was an artist and as a spray tan artist it

3:21Paige DeSorbo: takes one to know one it takes them to know one game recognizes game she said to me at the end

3:26Hannah Berner: like look a lot of girls don't like to like sit in it anymore because they're used to like the quick quick ones and i'm like i love marinating and she's like eight to ten hours and i said honey I love laying in bed for eight to ten hours I got you so what made her what differentiated her mixing up her own stuff okay a potion just throwing a bottle in there mixing up her own stuff and then her technique was it was a ballet it was truly it was a soft touch you love a soft i love a soft touch um she was like also i feel no pain when it comes to beauty like she's like it's really cold and i'm like literally do whatever you need to do well i had my america's

4:15Paige DeSorbo: next step model week where i got it okay you know what's crazy is like this is a normal week for me

4:22Hannah Berner: this is yeah this is your like days off yeah this is my hobby page this is so me so i'm walking

4:30Paige DeSorbo: trying to get trying to find this facial place and as you know i just googled and i like the photo of some place and these gigglers stopped me they said hannah what are you doing because i was just lost on a corner um normally people see me i'm doing something weird i was literally like turning around lost and they're like what are you looking for and i'm like i'm trying to find this place and they were like oh are you going to this facialist and i'm like never heard of them before and they're like where they're the best you should have and i'm like well you should have told me before I booked this yeah so I get to the place it's locked also it was like in the back of a back alley no one's there she ends up texting me and like arrives to open the place and I'm like okay this is okay it gets the worm okay this was this was 5 p.m but um okay I got dermaplanes she did cut me a little okay by the nose but I assume that's a risk that you take whenever you get dermaplaned maybe then i go to get my nails done when i tell you it was like an snl sketch she looks at me and she goes you have a lot of skin i thought i've hit every insecurity a person could have she's i'm like what does that mean i have a lot of skin wait what does that mean i feel like she was taking out the cuticles and i guess it was like taking forever okay i don't know i didn't have a follow-up i said sorry as you do what do you say i said i am so sorry miss you're like i got it from my dad i don't know and then you know i hate like getting stuff done so she was like do you want a pedicure and you know that i need a pedicure but you know that i don't want to sit for a pedicure so i was like oh no thank you i don't have time but she was you could tell she wanted me to do more things so then she started being like chin wax i was like

6:21Hannah Berner: okay ma 'am she's an eyebrow wax you want to know what i want i want who's ever performing something on me to have no boundaries yes like she was literally looking me up and down being like

6:35Paige DeSorbo: you can't leave here we have work to do and i kept saying thank you but no thank you noted noted um but then i got derma planed and she got my beard off and then i got a spray tan and I leave tomorrow morning for Toronto and we pray. Yeah, I was just going to say we're saying our prayers. But I was going to say I feel a lot less stressed because the first Netflix special was The Unknown. I didn't know what I signed up for. I was scared. Now, I've been in Hollywood, baby. I've been in this business. We're both taking beta blockers this weekend. Multiple ones. Yeah. You can't help but the adrenaline to start pumping.

7:14Paige DeSorbo: Right. I'm excited. Anyway, how is L.A.?

7:16Hannah Berner: You know, LA is LA. I did something real. I hate that I'm even going to say this. I did something really cool today, but I can't say what it was. And I can say in like a couple weeks. I hate when people say that. But let me just put like a top line on it. It was my dream. You want to know what? Where I went, my phone was taped. So like I couldn't take any pictures or anything. And I looked at everyone with me and I was like, guys, have we ever been more in the moment than we are right now? Like it actually was so nice because none of us had our phones. And so we were all just like looking at each other like, this is crazy.

7:52Hannah Berner: Like, I can't believe we're doing this. It was like a field trip. Yeah, it was a literal field trip. And like Miss Frizzle was there. Like it was so much fun.

8:01Paige DeSorbo: Speaking of third grade, I was getting DMs saying that people were making fun of you because you said, remember when we learned the alphabet in third grade? I know. They were like, oh, middle school.

8:11Hannah Berner: Guys, you know what the fuck I meant. Okay. Get the hell out of my DMs with that bullshit. I'm worked up tonight.

8:22Paige DeSorbo: Oh, yes. Go off.

8:24Hannah Berner: Okay. Last time we recorded, when we were talking about the hockey thing, I hadn't really seen the full video. I saw a clip of it. I knew it was going on, but I didn't really, really know until you were like, and you describe all our sports to us. I'm on the ground. now the aftermath of the men making first of all no men should be making videos videos are for girls tiktok is for girls the men making videos being like you guys are overreacting you know what it

9:01Paige DeSorbo: also is it's literally just i had to be like the patriarchy but it's a bunch of men being like girls have cooties let's not invite the girls and then all the men just hanging out together being like sucking each other's dicks like it's they're so scared of women being good at something it's

9:21Hannah Berner: also so funny that they're so dumb to not even understand the nuance of it like their rebuttal being like but the men like publicly were so like they went to the girls games and they were so supportive and we're like right that's the fucking point that we're trying to make publicly you thought that like that was okay but behind closed doors so all your public shit negated it like we only care about gay hockey players which i'm sure half of you are like that's why you're so mad at us yeah and then i don't know if you saw clips of like wait and never did i think that flava flave was going to be one of the number one feminists in the year 2026 i mean what is happening

10:02Paige DeSorbo: what is literally happening do you know eileen goo the skier i don't she's like a super model she's like a super you love her she looks like this is a girl that's like 22 years old and it's

10:16Hannah Berner: like so fucking smart and like her answers yeah she's talking about neuroplasticity and the guys

10:21Paige DeSorbo: are like let us make bad jokes also look i'm the first one who loves a joke not a good joke it's like we're not in elementary school like let's not invite the girls like good one it's also like

10:33Hannah Berner: guys it took you 40 years you're losers like like i was talking to a guy about this and he was like well i don't know if you understand that like it's like a big game because it's 40 years i'm like do i understand that they've sucked for 40 years no i get that like i get it as we're seeing in a lot

10:50Paige DeSorbo: of these sports i always say like i'm not saying men and women are the same they're different and that's okay but they should be treated with equal respect and different sometimes means that people enjoy watching women's sports more for example some people love watching women's tennis more than men's tennis because because it's more complicated in terms of strategy because their serves aren't as big so it's not just holding serve with girls tennis crazier stuff happens it's more entertaining there's longer points and like women's golf people like to see there's just like so many different things and women's basketball also there's reasons people like it more and as we're getting more visibility the men better watch out they better watch out

11:37Hannah Berner: don't you have a fucking mom call your mom and say this but this is the thing i'm so sick of

11:42Paige DeSorbo: these men being like i didn't know and then i had a daughter you shouldn't have to have a fucking

11:48Hannah Berner: daughter oh girl that is so annoying and also i personally like a lot of these athlete men

11:57Paige DeSorbo: not good people and i've heard a lot of women and i'm not gonna match generalizing but raise your hand if you've been personally victimized also not to like take this to a serious note but like

12:09Hannah Berner: the whole like not all men i don't have a single friend i do not have one single female friend who has not been in a situation where a man either inappropriately touched her did something to her

12:23Paige DeSorbo: i'm getting a spray tan and the woman's telling me how she had to leave her last job because the guy was hitting on her and she didn't hit on him back and she couldn't tell his boss because the boss was creepier than him and it's so crazy you said that because yes some guy there was a podcast going around and the guy was like yeah like i got i got broken hearted like what's the worst thing that happened to you and the girl was like i was assaulted and the girl next to her goes so was i

12:49Hannah Berner: one time i was in college and i like went to this job interview for like an internship and the boss of like i was at a news station like this was like a local fucking news station and the head of the like the head of the news i had to meet with the director whatever i don't even know what his goddamn title was he made me so uncomfortable that I I walked out was in the parking lot started crying called my mom immediately drove to school went into my like professor's office who like sets up all the interviews told it was thank god it was a woman told her what happened she immediately got up on the phone called him and was like our school will never participate in any of your internships moving forward like you're done because I was like I don't want any girl ever going and working there and then while I'm in the interview mind you I'm like 19 years old when I'm in the interview one of the male news anchors Facebook messages me I really hope you work here I was like yo what the fuck goes on at this news station it was and this was in my hometown like I was so uncomfortable i ended up going and working at a different news station but that's a great

14:09Paige DeSorbo: example of like an environment that they're creating that it's okay for men to act like that yeah and that was literally what we're watching on tv a bunch of men just being like who gives a fuck if the women feel disrespected who gives a fuck if they're the butt of the joke we don't give

14:24Hannah Berner: a fuck and that was my first time ever having that happen with a man in the workplace then i went to New York City and the guy threw his keys on me but I digress you know that was like

14:35Paige DeSorbo: honestly we're not even gonna get we'll get to our super traumatic stories another day we we're trying to it's Friday but I will say no I actually will say this made me really really

14:51Hannah Berner: be so excited to raise a son like beyond excited because I'm like oh this generation like us being moms and having sons that's it we're done like it's over there's no more of like your bullshit like girls aren't as good like it's really what it is is the men see us as like second class citizens like they they do not see us as equal not none of them they don't it's anyway so one more thing about the men who the fuck told you guys that you're good looking enough to have a goddamn mullet

15:32Paige DeSorbo: enough enough you know they're overcompensating the mullet guys are overcompensating imbeciles you literally look like rats the mullet guys are just trying to distract from something either a bad personality um bad things they're doing that they don't want you to see they're like look i'm silly i have a mullet while they're like literally being the worst person in the world um it's just

15:53Hannah Berner: like it's also just like disgusting like you look stupid but again that's for other men they get

16:01Paige DeSorbo: for other men which you know what is it's like a weird peacocking like symbol wait men love like

16:09Hannah Berner: impressing each other and it's so freaking weird but i do have to say i thought that this generation

16:16Paige DeSorbo: of gen z boys was going to be amazing because the millennials we had such a strong well it's backfired because they think the women are like trying to take their jobs where it's like no one's trying to take your job you got to go to college first to get a job you got to talk to people to

16:31Hannah Berner: get a job the men are dropping out of college at an egregious rate it's insane because they just

16:38Paige DeSorbo: want it handed to them the girls we've just been taught to like work hard if we want to make our dreams come true so anyway i digress um speaking of men i'm like a really like i'm in a really man-hating mood right now speaking of men i was inst louis when i tell you there's two men who are so handsome in the second row of my show like you can they're sitting i can tell they're

17:04Hannah Berner: six three you can tell a strong torso i can tell that these women stand up and it's gonna be like i can know a torso from a mile away and these men their shoulders jacked and their chiseled

17:18Paige DeSorbo: jaw lines and this is missouri so they're just wearing you know normal midwest clothes and i'm so fucking full of myself i'm like okay the two hottest men in missouri were like we have to go see the hannah burner show and i would have called them out in the beginning but they're so hot i was like didn't want to get them angry i got nervous i did i did at one point i was like they keep staring at me this is crazy they're obsessed with me they're obsessed like the whole show staring at me and then towards the end i finally am like look i have to say it everyone feels weird why are you two sitting next to each other because you know we don't like when two men sit next to each other at the show they form alliances it makes people uncomfortable and i go and they just are looking at me stern handsome gorgeous and i go you two better be fucking each other where they both are like we are oh thank god they look like the two football players in a rom-com that are just like the stars of the football team sitting next to each other googly eye over me and i said thank you for coming to my show um how did you guys meet and they were like at the gym and i was like i know your bodies are gorgeous i can tell under your shirts and they i said how did you like approach each other in the locker room and they were like i gave him a look and i realized straight girls are not aware of the gay look that is rampant i am rampant so you can see when they

18:48Hannah Berner: the look happens i i feel like no hannah this is not even just in my imagination i feel like i've watched straight guys do it where i'm like to other gay men yeah because there's a look they

19:00Paige DeSorbo: give which is big like straight girls you don't we don't have it in our repertoire like will i fuck but like there's a whole different gay male gaze that they communicate with each other on a

19:13Hannah Berner: different way because i think that i think that they do it quicker than like a straight girl and a straight guy like i fucking because they had to there's so many men that have yeah that have to be like dl that it's so quick i was in a situation one time and i was like convinced that the guy i was dating was like making out i can't even get into it i actually can't even get into it because you know what what's wrong with me that i was like and that's fine and that's okay like and i'll stay that's actually a great question that's right you know i think it was like i was just so emotionally unavailable but i wouldn't admit it but you know what i get so many messages from girls

19:57Paige DeSorbo: who were like i hate him he's mean to me i don't like his friends like give me all these reasons and then they're like should i break up like i'm like you've given me no pros in this this list

20:10Hannah Berner: you've given i'm like okay so he murdered my dog but like he was old um my cds are in his car I was gonna say this is like the first time I've been away from kitty in a while Oh babe I'm sorry And I'm doing okay but kitty is not You're tearing up No Kitty has wreaked havoc for two days straight Because she's like where the fuck is my mom And I know that she's wreaking havoc because I know her type of revenge And it's all shit in your bed i'll shit in your bed until my mom comes home cats take on their owner's personality she has sicilian revenge she's very vengeful low-key proud of her i'm like yeah make your mark girl let it be known that you're pissed i'm like i wish i could text her and be like i'll be

21:05Paige DeSorbo: home in five days i try to facetime her but no like i feel so bad for kitty um maybe i'll go over and see her but i have to go to toronto the mom is working both her moms are working

21:16Hannah Berner: you know what's funny too is like my cat's name is kitty like everyone that comes over and knows

21:24Paige DeSorbo: daphne like will be like what's up kitty you talk about her calling her daphne but to her face you call her kitty kitty well yeah that's her government name is happening but at home she's sleeping listening to us my favorite thing about cats and i saw this meme recently and it's so fucking true is dogs will be like what are we doing where are we going what are we doing like following you around where cats just happen to be in the same room as you all the time no kitties

21:52Hannah Berner: always like oh i didn't know you were in the bedroom i just heard him but her sleeping on

21:57Paige DeSorbo: the bed next to me but she was sleeping on the couch a second ago she just happened

22:02Hannah Berner: they're just the best um i wish we could see like an actual stat like a real number of how many girls have gotten cats because of this podcast i mean it's got to be over it's got to be over 150 there's

22:19Paige DeSorbo: been a beta blocker and feline adoption rate spike in 2025 no the feline rate is did i say feline rate but i love that also did you see benny blanco what do you do so he's launching a podcast coming for our jobs um by himself or with a co-host i actually don't know those details but there's a clip going around of him he has no no shoes on which like whatever like get your views he's barefoot but the bottom of his feet are like black and then he like farts on selena gomez's couch so there's just like a clip going viral being like Benny's dirty and farting Selena's couch wait a minute wait a minute wait don't even google it

23:08Hannah Berner: you'll get upset coming for your brand second we talked about I was like okay you've listened to one episode of giggly squad you're like yeah when you say farted on the couch like they're

23:23Paige DeSorbo: recording the pod yeah he was like can the microphone pick up this and he let out a fart that was actually so dainty and high-pitched i got the ick if you're gonna fart fart like fart like a grown-up okay like fart like you ate a full meal don't fart like my cat bodily functions

23:47Hannah Berner: it's natural it's human sometimes it was the least worst part about it the feet being dirty

23:53Paige DeSorbo: that's disgusting well this is the thing we all know that he he has trillions of dollars um there's no excuse and even if your feet are dirty put on a flip-flop no just go in the shower

24:06Hannah Berner: run the water and it'll literally it'll literally it was just not just going viral but then also Sometimes if I'm, I mean, if I'm like in my apartment, like I don't care, whatever. But if I walk, I'm not really walking anywhere bare feet. But like in the summer, if I'm going outside and I'm like outside and like whatever. And I come back into my house or something. If I ever went outside. If I like enjoyed nature for a minute and I came back inside before I get in my bed, I'm rinsing my feet. Even if I'm not showering, even if I've showered that morning.

24:42Paige DeSorbo: shower always if i spill if i spill ketchup on my knee i'm taking a full shower if i could catch up behind my fingernails i'm taking a full shower yeah i don't want to see this clip actually i think she's not a gasp i think she's like yeah i didn't i didn't marry this guy because he was clean right he never tricked her and like he was like glenn powell who looks like he showers every

25:09Hannah Berner: second yeah i've had multiple boyfriends who will not fart in front of me page i am so sorry that is

25:17Paige DeSorbo: gay that is they're not establishing dominance a man farting is the only way he establishes his dominance and but you know how i respond stronger i'm almost like is it me you make him so anxious

25:35Hannah Berner: Jesse can't fart. Do I make them so nervous that they're like, their buttholes are like, this will actually, she'll leave. She'll never talk to me again. I'm like, whatever. Keep that energy.

25:47Paige DeSorbo: When we've been in the green room and you know I have my nervous poops and then you have to go to the bathroom and you get upset. That's some of my biggest joy is watching you get worked up. Because sometimes you, no, because Hannah,

26:00Hannah Berner: there's so many situations where you fully hot boxed me. and i'm like you didn't have to do this to me you're like mid panic attack and i'm like you just farted in my mouth i'm like did you have doritos today i'm like i'm trying to distract you

26:19Paige DeSorbo: um kim kardashian lazy never works yeah put out an energy drink where does she find the time no wait where does she find the time but it got me thinking because i feel like everyone has an energy drink nowadays we should come out with a sleepy drink or we put out an energy drink but for girls who like you don't actually want too much energy you just want enough to like get out of your depression but you don't want too much that you're like jittery so it's just called like

26:50Hannah Berner: a little bit of energy a small bit see i think we should come out with a drink that makes you

26:56Paige DeSorbo: fully comatose i know but like a liquid melatonin i know but someone you know like sleep drinks were really in for a while they're like this is my drink for sleep i have i have oh like sleeping

27:08Hannah Berner: oh because people were putting like magnesium in it i actually still every once in a while we'll do that i would say like once a week i have magnesium in a drink i put on the golf channel and i listen to them go yeah that'll get you right jim we're approaching the fourth tee you're literally it's funny because you you love your grandpa so much you are my grandpa like i don't have a grandpa i haven't had a grandpa since i was four years old but if i had to think of what a grandpa would be like right now it's you for me you're like hey do you want to go to the u.s open i'm like not really but okay i'll go because you like it and we'll have some jokes yeah you're like i could teach you tennis i'm like okay grandpa

27:57Paige DeSorbo: and then i'm like watch me play some tennis and you're like grandpa

28:03Hannah Berner: no literally watching you like no i'm actually not going to talk bad about that because i love watching you play tennis because i love sitting it's my art yeah i'm like look at her having fun

28:15Paige DeSorbo: it's actually the prettiest i ever am when i'm playing tennis it's like the one time i like look put together no you're a ballerina you're not like messing up it is performance art it's a choreography i don't want to bring this up because it's upsetting but i'm gonna bring it up have you seen all the punch the monkey stuff yeah why are they putting this footage out like i can't handle it emotionally they're distracting us from all the other fucked up shit that's going on did you see the new white lotus cast announcement no i didn't so what's crazy about it is somehow every season they literally cast this exact same people but different fonts wait i'm gonna look it up right now which makes me you kind of like it because it's like a formula but i'm like how did he find the perfect person who's just like the other guy is this even now season four i think

29:11Hannah Berner: four helena bought i never know how to say her name helena bonham carter yep she's just perfect for whatever he's putting her yeah whatever her role is it's gonna be perfect perfect aj

29:27Paige DeSorbo: mccullough is that oh yeah ali and aj it's aj oh my god good for her she's perfect because she reminds me they all just they fit perfectly then there's always like steve coogan he's definitely a european that's not an american looking man yes i've seen him british yeah movies yeah so they

29:46Hannah Berner: always need like a british guy he's in that he's in a will ferrell and mark walberg movie that's what i know i'm from and ari grainer i know her what is she from there's something i know her

29:59Paige DeSorbo: from and then alexander ludwig ludwig i don't know how they say it is just like the classic hot guy um ari greener you know she changes her hair color a lot um she was in a lot of things she was in bad teacher she was in yes i'm used to her being blonde that's what it is yep yeah wow this is gonna be so good so we're locked in i do have to say remember we're like oh people who are on reality tv and like who's gone on to be successful shout out to mike white yep mike fucking white okay put some respect on his name good there's hope for us yet

30:40Paige DeSorbo: um oh so there was a blizzard in new york city this last weekend and people were upset that they're still making the news people go into the blizzard to be like hey there's a blizzard and then they get like hit in the face with like par for the course as a journalist what is your opinion so you don't think they could just be by a window be like hey yeah there's a blizzard look in college

31:06Hannah Berner: i quickly learned meteorology wasn't for me sorry they didn't do the same get your ass out in that

31:14Paige DeSorbo: goddamn rainstorm nobody wants to work these days nobody wants to work these days i how do i know

31:20Hannah Berner: it's windy unless i see your jacket moving get your ass on the streets and give us some infield to reporting this is not a remote job but also like they could just know honestly who are already on the street like there's no reason they gotta show the conditions look that's the number one reality tv show out there it's the goddamn local news and well they realize the ratings go up when

31:48Paige DeSorbo: you like chuck a guy in a suit in the middle of a hurricane and see if he floats yeah people want to see what's going on out there give the people no i'm here for people in the news reporters in the

32:03Hannah Berner: hurricanes okay as long as they get out safely obviously and they don't push it to the limit but like you know give us a good give us one hit you can give us one news hit i don't need you out there all night just give us one hit of like what from your perspective what's it like in the trenches of it and then what about when it's raining to get an umbrella that's why they invented them but not girls no not girls no because they girls want to stay in they're like yeah if they want to stay in the studio they can stay in the studio if it's a little humid she

32:36Paige DeSorbo: shouldn't have to go outside because then her hair could get kind of like fuzzy not fuzzy what

32:41Hannah Berner: is it called um staticky yeah i was just gonna say something now i forgot oh speaking of hair I looked up the ice skater because when you said that like oh she has like halos in her hair I don't know what I was like expecting that's what the gen z's call it yeah and then I looked it up it actually looked so cool when she had it in a pony when she was doing her routine well I think she

33:05Paige DeSorbo: put it in a bun out of like kind of a respect thing to be like okay I'm not gonna dye it back but I'll put it in a bun. Did she get points deducted for it? I don't know, but you know what I do know? They all do their own makeup. Really? When I watch the documentary, they're all like us before a show, just when I'm on the road, just in the mirror of the hotel room putting on their makeup, and I'm like, they shouldn't have to worry about glam.

33:35Hannah Berner: I was seeing, they were talking about this about traitors too, that they all do their own glam that's i don't know if i believe that i mean maura higgins her glam no she was like she was doing her own good for her and i think she was wearing wigs yeah because she was always like had different hairstyles and like would have a hat on so which is actually so fucking smart of her because that's it like the hair is done you just have to like put it on your head you're so right and she threw a hat on yeah but not all of us can pull off a hat especially like the wild hats how much how early were they getting up to like do glam and then start i would i literally it's intense would never want to do it it's two weeks it's like

34:22Paige DeSorbo: do it two weeks and then you're done it's not like a six month event one of the girls natalie everyone's making fun of her for her outfits so obviously i sympathize and not for from what oh from traders well she's it's funny because they'll be eating breakfast and she'll walk in just with like a bodycon a bodycon dress or she looks like she's like a female wrestler she's also like um a weightlifter so she's you could tell like she's not normally wearing these fancy clothes she's basically dressing how she thought she should and everyone's making fun of her whatever so she says she's like she's like i wish i hired a stylist but like she's like i'm from survivor we just had to show up and survive like i didn't know this was a fashion walk but the truth is is traitors is kind of a fashion show well it's also like people are just so mean

35:08Hannah Berner: to women it's like crazy like if sorry if you feel comfortable and i don't even watch the show if you feel comfortable enough going what's her name danielle natalie natalie if you feel comfortable enough going on natalie's instagram and commenting your outfit sucks get a life

35:26Paige DeSorbo: she's also like gorgeous and so strong and just like an amazing personality um i'm sure she's lovely she's also classic this is oh okay this is where the traitors is funny when you're a woman on the traitors if you're loud people are like she's a crazy bitch i don't trust her but if you're a loud man you're assertive he's everyone listens to him we're like natalie was loud and everyone's like she's a villain schemer and then when the girls are quiet it's like they think they're up to something but when a man is quiet he's just smart they had a literal kidnapper on

36:10Hannah Berner: the cast like check the trunk of that guy's car what are we talking about are you kidding like god forbid she wore a strapless shirt to breakfast this guy could be murdering people

36:27Paige DeSorbo: i watch rupaul's drag race now i finished season 12 and now i'm starting season seven why why are you going in such a weird order great question i don't know i think because i

36:38Hannah Berner: i don't know i'm sure the gigglers can tell you because like when i first started love island many many moons ago i was told like start at season two and then go you know so i'm sure the

36:50Paige DeSorbo: gigglers can give you like the best seasons i think five and six are the best i also trixie and katya have like an amazing podcast so i want to see their season wait actually tell me what

37:02Hannah Berner: season that is because i am obsessed with their clips i feel like they're us if we were gay men no i well i was a gay man i feel like i'm m1 right now i have so much testosterone but yet i love glam wait i was gonna pitch this to you off the pod but i think it's the perfect time

37:23Paige DeSorbo: great to do hannah and page do drag yeah and we have to get drag queens to put us in full drag

37:30Hannah Berner: outfit walk lip sync i fear i'm gonna love it i fear like that is who i am now can i ask the

37:41Paige DeSorbo: hardest question i've ever asked on this pod sure who do you think has more testosterone me or you

37:47Hannah Berner: okay actually because like i've wait because i had when i froze my eggs you have to get your blood tested well you have to do it like every other day when you're getting freezing your eggs but you go in for like your initial blood test and i that's why my doctor like originally thought i had pcos because i had so much testosterone yeah you never cried and you were kind of i'm no better than a man i'm no better than a man no i really no i definitely have a high You punched a wall.

38:28Paige DeSorbo: You would slap my ass for no reason.

38:34Hannah Berner: Someone cheated on me in the fifth grade and I never got over it. Okay. That's why I am the way that I am. Have some compassion.

38:44Paige DeSorbo: No, literally.

38:45Hannah Berner: Did you get tested after the egg retrieval and you balanced a little? No, so then when I was doing my egg retrieval and they were giving me way more than I should be having, I was leveled out.

38:59Paige DeSorbo: I actually was obsessed with you during your egg retrieval. You were obsessed with yourself.

39:03Hannah Berner: I was a joy.

39:04Paige DeSorbo: I was a pleasure to have around. A pleasure in class. Truly a pleasure. You had empathy.

39:12Hannah Berner: You were asking people questions. I was helping old ladies across the street. I was doing the most. You were picking up litter. They immediately took those eggs out of me and I was like, fuck you. Fuck your mom. I'll fuck your dad. Like I was. No. And did I ever go like get checked after? No, I definitely am still. But I will say after I froze my eggs, my period has never been more regular.

39:40Paige DeSorbo: That's amazing.

39:41Hannah Berner: So I think maybe like it did even me out a little bit.

39:44Paige DeSorbo: Like some people will tell girls like you're in your masculine energy. you're not going to find a man what do you think about that hannah that's an amazing question and

39:52Hannah Berner: i have an amazing answer being feminine is very different than being um i don't even want to say the word submissive because i feel like that's like almost a little bit harsh no but submissive is kind of like the traditional when you're in a relationship with a man being no being feminine is like a personality trait but I would say being like nurturing or like being soft or like being like oh yeah like whatever I guess like a form of submissive is not a personality trait it's like a response to how you treat me so like I've had so many boyfriends where I'm like okay and now I guess I'm a fucking man because I have to be in charge of all this goddamn bullshit where like not like then you're get into relationships with men and i'm like i'm so silly and i'm like wait what if we like stayed up late and like talked about everything and that is just like a response to how that man makes you feel it's a response level to your security so like yeah have i been in certain relationships and i'm like i'm so fucking masculine right now yes but is it because of me no i hate to say it that's literally exactly what i was gonna say because i've been told in

41:11Paige DeSorbo: the past like oh you're in your masculine energy whatever and i'm like yeah because i have to because i have to be that's like a fight or flight yes if you feel like you're in your masculine energy it's because you're in fight or flight also i love being in full whatever masculine energy is and i put that in quotations because it's just society telling you that being business-minded is like masculine but i'll be on like some call i know so many men who are i've watched business

41:36Hannah Berner: fail fail and i'm like what go back to college honey yeah obviously missed a class like i know more horrible businessmen than i do business women i know a ton of amazing business

41:51Paige DeSorbo: women you know it's crazy i was looking at like businesses like and just like which ones are up and coming that i want to like follow i'm obsessed with like foods and stuff like i love seeing like

42:02Hannah Berner: and a new food that gets invented yeah like my girl like the girl that has freestyle olives yes i love i found them years ago and i'm just like fuck yeah i love supporting that girl but

42:14Paige DeSorbo: i feel like i would want to be a part of a business that a woman was running because i'm like she's not gonna let it die she is going to mother and nurture and care and be detail oriented where the man i'm like i feel like he's i feel like he's cheating me like i feel like he's like

42:31Hannah Berner: he could get a fast one any he could leave in the middle of the night i'm like double check the numbers i don't trust him but you know it's so true be yourself and then the right guy puts you in that place like you can't help but be like feeling cute around him if a guy makes you

42:54Paige DeSorbo: feel like like big and serious around him that's not your man no that's not your man if you have

43:00Hannah Berner: to be in charge that is not your man and also speaking of business women we both have female lawyers oh we have the best and i think that's extremely important to also my lawyer this might

43:15Paige DeSorbo: be a little too much um i don't want to give away your identity she's also the like has multiple children and is the president of her pta she runs like everything she's just like we can't do it all

43:27Hannah Berner: we can't do it all we can no we actually can like you know what is funny because now like i'll go on like work trips like i'm in la for like a pretty long time and i would have never thought this even like a year ago but i literally got off my flight like got to my hotel and my thought was like yeah i could do i could have a baby i could bring a baby on like this work trip oh is that sweet wait that's so sweet i mean i'm not gonna because that would be crazy but like in but i was like oh like could i still do this and like have a baby and i was like yeah i fucking could because i've dated so many babies that i'm like i could fuck i could do this i also want to raise awareness to

44:12Paige DeSorbo: there's something about right now with what's going on like the whole hockey thing the patriarchy enforces telling women like we need to keep the family structure alive which is basically saying we want women to be submissive we we want it to be traditional we want it old school we don't want women to have jobs like we just want women to be like making babies all the time it's a way to suppress women it's because it's if you care about not to get too into it but if you care about the economy the economy is better when women are working also taylor swift literally saved like

44:48Hannah Berner: multiple u.s cities just for showing up and also guess what your man's about a business

44:54Paige DeSorbo: no problem you're staying at home you're staying at home okay learn how to clean a dish because you can't do an excel sheet that's for sure oh god um news alert yeah i read an article on tiktok that said you actually don't

45:17Hannah Berner: need 10k steps a day are you fucking kidding me this article said hannah do you know that i've been obsessed with my 10k steps for two weeks because i googled what's gonna take my botox away and they were like you gotta sweat and you gotta do 10k steps and you gotta go in the sauna So every single day I'm like I wake up and I'm like if I don't get my 10k steps in I'll die.

45:39Paige DeSorbo: Oh because you're trying to release the Botox. Yeah I'm trying anything.

45:44Hannah Berner: You're in a glass case of your own Botox motion. I'm like I can't believe I did this to myself.

45:52Paige DeSorbo: It's not bad that you're doing 10k but I feel like 10k takes forever. Like low key I feel like a lot of girls are lying when they say they're doing 10k. Like that takes like three hours.

46:02Hannah Berner: no it takes a legit almost two you could do it in an hour 30 now if you have a walking pad that's

46:09Paige DeSorbo: another thing but like going out and walking for two hours like you could get robbed like that's

46:14Hannah Berner: like a risk you know so it's three walks for me a day or you're a full dog or

46:23Hannah Berner: you have to get walked three times or you get a little spicy yeah and if you piss me off i'll pee on your shoe um it's three walks a day for me or it's like an hour and a half on the okay

46:38Paige DeSorbo: and you have like a unique life situation not everyone can have three walks a day um so anyway the article said that actually you just need 7k a day oh thank god 7k and i did it today 7k is more attainable and people won't quit as much so like if you want to get healthy and on your feet. Wait, Hannah. 7K. Yeah.

47:03Hannah Berner: Do you know that I have a step app that I compete with other people in? Well, you know, it's crazy. You never invited me. Do you want in? Are you scared of this heat? No, I'm not scared of that heat. You want me to put you in my family one? I'll put you in my family one. Wait, yeah, put me in. It's me, Gary, Amanda, and Joe. And so I'll add you. I'm sending you the link immediately. just to let you know gary doesn't even check in we have no idea if he's even alive and this was all created for gary one day i texted him and i was like hey dude uh says seven steps you good

47:44Paige DeSorbo: like are you alive wait it can see how little steps you do i don't like that at all well i

47:50Hannah Berner: have i have down days you have to go into the app and then it'll like update register it okay Well, you know, I'm at 7 ,544. Amanda's at 6 ,971. Gary, it says no. He never checked in. So we'd have no idea. See, I love a rest day. Hey, we got to have a rest day. Were you walking around L.A.? Doll, I woke up this morning at 7 a.m. I was in the gym by 7.30. I was out of the gym by 8.30, showered by 9, filmed something quick, then got into glam I'm at 10 and I just sat down for the first time today.

48:27Paige DeSorbo: But you know what? When you have something filmed coming up, you love a workout. See me. I love.

48:35Hannah Berner: I'm in my head. Because you want to know why? Because, well, that's why. Yeah, it gets you out of your head. I feel like when I work out every single day before like an event that I know I'm going to be nervous at, it like helps your mental. And also because you were talking about that ski girl, I did see that clip. okay this is like so embarrassing but i'm just gonna say it you know how like people do like affirmations okay well like sometimes i'm like that's like so corny i'm not like saying in my head so i came up with my own that like makes sense for me and this is our private podcast

49:11Paige DeSorbo: you can say anything you want okay this is our diary my affirmation first i picture the people that I hate the most. This is so Sicilian.

49:22Hannah Berner: I get the colloquio. And my affirmation is, fuck you, watch this. So in my head, before I'm nervous for anything, I think about all the people that want me to fail. And in my head, I say, fuck you, watch this. And then I go and I do it. Do you know what that's actually doing?

49:41Paige DeSorbo: You're feeling the feeling of being like, I already won. Yeah. And that's actually manifestation to before you do it, sit in the feeling of like it already went the way you wanted. I also find when you put too much pressure on yourself and if you're like, this is life and death. If I do badly, like I can't function. If I do great, I'll be the greatest ever. That is not good either. It's more just like I'm the shit. I'm doing what I do. This isn't going to make or break me. This isn't going to make me a good person, a bad person. This isn't going to change anything in my life. if you're happy before you'll be happy after if you're unhappy before you'll be happy after that's

50:21Hannah Berner: that's like really my own shit um but also when you're with the wrong person and you feel you feel like even more that it's life or death because when you don't have someone to go home

50:31Paige DeSorbo: to that like will comfort you also eileen goo said something that i related to a lot it's a little more stand-up and sports-y but it's fucking what a good quote she goes i practice like i've never won and i compete like i've never lost wow okay so she's fully prepared yeah she's and she

50:54Hannah Berner: went to stanford okay that's where we lost any ivy league schools i was going to cornell because

51:01Paige DeSorbo: that's where my mom went oh you got in yeah but they um they didn't have scholarships so i went to wisconsin smart because deep down i felt like i knew i was going to be an entrepreneur and that the school i went to wasn't gonna even though i had no idea what kind of entrepreneur no one offered me to apply to any of those so this is like you're gonna be so jealous and this is so cunty of me i'm a legacy you are well when your parent goes to an ivy oh you're a legacy so like the legacy but are you still if you didn't go i don't think so but i was for a moment so like now

51:42Hannah Berner: your like if your daughter went to wisconsin they'd be like she's a legacy but me and my mom went to the same high school and it's still and it's still there it's still happening yes

51:55Paige DeSorbo: um final final question of the pod marching band jackets are predicted to be trending in 2026

52:05Hannah Berner: yes or no yes and that is the end of our podcast and that's your daily dose see you next time

52:12Paige DeSorbo: thank you for giggling with us we love you so much send us good vibes for me shooting the special this weekend page is on netflix for the actor awards and we need all your positive vibes yeah there's not enough beta bloggers in the world we love you so much bye

52:34Thank you.