Did Shrek find the 4th Dimension?

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0:36A morning working in the garden or maybe on the golf course can leave you more depleted than you realize. And plain water isn't always the most efficient way to restore the balance. That's where liquid IV comes in. Its science-backed formula is clinically proven to hydrate faster than water alone. Whether you're exercising, playing outside, or simply surviving a summer heat wave, it's an easy way to stay hydrated. Shop now at liquidiv.com. Liquid IV, hydration that goes wherever life takes you. I've got some little memories here, Joe. Oh, yeah, go on. Like when sort of in the middle of the night or something, I have a little flashback of the in-between.

1:15Yeah. Do you remember, right, where were we? All I've written here is Shrek 4D. and I don't know anything else about it. I just remember me and you being annoyed because you know you go to like theme parks and stuff like that. I don't like three-dimensional films. Well, 3D is fine. Do we still do them? No, we spoke about this already. Have we? But when you go to a theme park or something, you'll go on a ride that's called Shrek 4D. I remember me and you talking about this and both being annoyed about it because we're like, oh, they found a fourth dimension. it's like it's not 4d is it that a bit of water sprays in your face or something like that yeah it's so you'll go and see like a 3d thing of shrek but the wind will blow on you and stuff like that's not a fourth dimension it's part of the third dimension yeah it absolutely is and i i just remember me and you it was yeah i don't know if we went to somewhere and there was a ride where it was 4d was we maybe uh was we maybe at thought park or something like that or somewhere in Australia, but we were just sort of like, no, not having it.

2:23Not having 4D. You can't call a ride 4D. You haven't discovered the fourth dimension. We're very keen as a species to... We can't wait to be able to go, we've got the fourth dimension. We found it. We found the fourth dimension. We've kind of got the press release ready. We've now got it. Here it is. And you're like, that, mate, is a bucket of water. Yeah. It's totally... We would not be able to understand the concept of it at all whatsoever. Well, some people say it's time. Do they? Some people do say that. I don't know. Well, I just heard that some people do say that. No, I think some people do.

3:06But time's a whole thing as well. I've started looking into time now and that's fucking, that's fucked me up. Don't understand time at all whatsoever anymore now. because planets and suns and stuff can warp time. They can. Gravity has a huge impact on time. The way that we see time as it starts here and then we'll get to there in the future. Planets and stuff can fucking mess about with it. So you end up with Inception. Not Inception. What's the other film? Interstellar. E.T. E.T. You end up with E.T. yeah there was a whole half hour cut out of ET where Elliot and ET talk about time that's all you're going to say no but it does the sun messes about with time and then when you get close to a black hole then time goes all fucked it goes all mental the speed of light that can curve is a constant but time isn't so if you manage to get light if light appears to have gone faster than the speed of light, what's actually happened is that time has slowed down.

4:24That's it. Yeah, time's slowed down. Time slows down. Light, you don't fuck with light. You do fuck with time. Because there's things in the observable universe that are so far away that they shouldn't really be there or something because it would take us longer than when the universe, the Big Bang happens. honestly it makes me sick all that stuff are you saying that we're like looking at something and we're going how have you got all the way over there well how old's the universe what is it what do they say about 15 billion or something like that 14.6 billion I think is the I've plucked that out of somewhere 13.8 billion years old but there's stuff that is like 15 billion light years away so we're going oh no that doesn't make sense so time's fucked light can get curved as well.

5:13Light can get sucked in by a black hole. It's all a mess. Shouldn't really worry about it, I guess. There's parts of Scotland that I haven't seen yet. Why are you worrying about, you know, look what's in your own backyard. Exactly. Before you're looking in someone else's. Exactly. It is confusing and I began reading a book about it and stopped on... about chapter four of 12, which I think gives you an idea of where I'm at. Because there's an episode of Futurama where they go so fast or something. Have you seen Futurama? It is really interesting. I've seen bits of it. It's equal parts interesting and clever and also very funny as well.

6:03I saw... Yeah, I've seen bits of it. I don't know why I'm still talking. There's an episode of Futurama where Dr. Farnsworth... Yep. I think it's Professor Farnsworth and Dr. Zoidberg. Yeah, and Dr. Zoidberg. Yeah, that's right. There's an episode in Futurama. Hey, they earned those titles. Yeah, fair enough. It was at Mars University where Farnsworth was Professor. There's an episode where Farnsworth soups up, like he sort of pimps my ride, their little spaceship, their little delivery spaceship. and he starts the episode is basically an episode of fast and furious but he ends up going so fast right that um he ends up in the second dimension right and so they're all flat and they they can only like move in certain and it becomes and what i took from that episode was oh no if there was a fourth dimension i wouldn't be able to understand it like i just wouldn't be able to understand how it works and everything.

7:10It's not really... Yes. It'd be like expecting an ant to understand chess or something. It definitely isn't having water sprayed in your face. It's not having water and it would be really extraordinary if we had found a fourth dimension and the sort of spearhead of its entry point into our world was on the Shrek ride. yeah do you know what I mean here's a question I've wanted if they had it a question I've wanted to ask you Joe no Nobel Prize but they've got it yeah sorry yeah is there anything from the in-betweeners that you actually say in your life because there is something for me I say hmm you do don't you but I think that doesn't really count because they they adapted that into the in-betweeners yeah what do you say funny funny funny yeah yeah Why would you do that?

8:06Funny. Say that a lot in my actual life. I wanted to say something the other day. I was at London Zoo and I bought a brownie for my daughter. And this is me getting old. But it was£4.95 for a brownie. Yeah. And I felt like saying, it better be delicious. Right. That's the first time it's happened. It's better be the best fucking brownie you've ever had. But I do think after, oh, this is terrible. You better stop fucking crying now I've given you this brownie. Yeah. Otherwise, I've just wasted a fiver. Well, yeah. It was whenever Hannah's not there, I immediately start bribing our daughter with sugar.

8:50Claire, I say it to Claire a lot because Claire's always asking me, why did you do that? And my answer is always funny. She spoke to me the other day like a builder on a building site. Right. Claire's got these posh hand soap things are they called? oh fuck I can't remember what they're called I didn't know what they were until Claire told me about them it begins with like Aesop that's it yeah so I'd never heard of them Claire bought some Aesop for the kitchen and she's got a soap and a hand cream and they're both there and they're there purely to impress people that come to our kitchen, right?

9:38Because, and I don't think, I don't know whether I should say this out loud or not, it was Aesop, but now it's filled with something else. I don't know what it's filled with. That's amazing. So we've got hand soap and hand cream, and the hand soap's on the left and hand cream's on the right. And what I like to do every now and again is just switch them so that eventually she goes to put some hand soap on her hands and it's hand cream. And she's like, and it's like, and it happened the other day. We were both in the kitchen and I didn't even, it took me a little while to realise what she was talking about, but she was by the, she was by the sink.

10:12She went to wash her hands and all I heard was, it's fucking pointless, mate. That's all she said to me. Like as if I'd hidden the drill on a building site or something like that. She just went fucking pointless, mate. I was just like, funny. Funny, isn't it? But that's something that I genuinely like to save from the in-betweeners. I've had bad experiences with the cream next to the soap. I don't know. Just put soap there. I think cream is one's own business, I think. I don't think we need to be. No. There's lots of things that I need. I mean, I take a dietary fiber supplement. I don't need that next to the soap.

10:55No. Just leave it. Soap's fine. You don't need to put the antidepressants there as well. Do you know what I mean? That's private. I've also got some quick facts here, Joe. Before I realised that we were going to do themes. Yeah. I started writing down, like, any time I'd come across a weird fact, I'd write it down. Well, yeah, I didn't know we were going to do themes. No. We don't have to do themes. No, we're doing them now. Here's a quick one. Oh, my God. Sorry. The average person walks past 16 murderers in their lifetime. Have I said that already? I don't know. I don't think so. I saw that. I was like, I'll write that down.

11:35I'll bring that up on the podcast. I met a lady at the stage door once of a play I was in. And she was like, have you heard this? I was to watch True Crime podcasts. Yeah. She said, have you heard this one? She went, my sisters and that. I went, oh, sorry. She went, no, no, no. She's the killer. Fucking hell. Claire would like to meet that person. Yeah. I was like, oh, God. And I didn't know what to say because I was like, Am I allowed to say something rude about murder? Do I need to start being quite... And she was like, it's okay, you can... Here's one for you. I'm very polite. I was like, I better not...

12:06I was like, I better not slag off murderers now. And she was like, it's all right, don't worry. You should be careful, to be fair. Good point. Good point. In fact, I'm going to quickly come up with a Pilkington-esque pun. Oh, yeah. For this one. Everyone has grenades. There you go. Oh, I see. I understand. Yeah. I get no... It's like it's not his vault. Yeah, yeah. Get a lobe of this. I'm committed to this treatment. I'm committed to this treatment. It is illegal to own only one guinea pig in Switzerland. Because they get sad. Swiss federal law under Article 13 of the Animal Protection Ordinance mandates that animals deemed social must be kept with at least one companion.

12:58of their species. Guinea pigs are explicitly listed. I mean, listen. They must be kept in pairs or groups. Well, that's nice. And I saw this one the other day as well, and I don't know whether this is true or not. Dogs, you're not allowed to walk one dog at a time in Germany. Apparently that's a rule. That's a law. You have to, you can't just have one dog on the lead. You've got to have at least two while you walk them. is there anything coming up with that yes in public areas oh hang on a second i've got here that a person is limited to walking only one dog at a time that makes more sense in public areas yeah that makes more sense um the u.s military tried to create a gay bomb i think i might have heard about this they tried to create some kind of bomb or chemical is that a pun on a bomb they're like what about gay bomb who's in the is like frat boys in the military yeah they dropped an A-bomb we can't make the gay bomb more like a gay bomb more like a gay bomb yeah we've got the A-bomb you've got the gay bomb we're fantastic you're made of plastic no but they did try to they thought honestly like try and turn people gay the sort of post second world war military I know it was bonkers wasn't it they went insane they were like maybe we could make a bomb we could make all the enemy army gay so they'd be too too interesting getting off of each other yeah yeah yeah yeah and also like didn't they rule into like LSD and trying to make it so that let's try and make it so that our soldiers can travel in time and bring each other's minds yeah MKUltra and all that sort of stuff which I think was a big influence on Stranger Things have you watched Stranger Things?

14:46no finished just no I'm gonna watch it honestly I haven't stopped thinking about it since it's finished I thought it was great I thought it was so good yeah I want to watch it I could no I haven't the whole last episode of Stranger Things is over two hours long and uh yeah and I watched Stranger Things with my oldest son Harrison and God knows how young he was when we started watching it and now he's like a 14 year old boy and I was one when he's died well yeah pretty much yeah oh I see really for For real. Yeah. Okay. 10 years old. I think it's taken them 10 years to sort of like the cast were all 12 and stuff and they started 11, 12 and now they're all sort of 21, 22.

15:26Okay. And all the way during, it's also, it's quite sad anyway that it's coming to an end. They really play into the sort of, oh look, we're all, this journey that we've been on together is coming to an end. And I was with my little boy who's now a sort of young man, I suppose now. Yeah. and fucking that last episode I was like trying not to cry all the way through it and we got and then we finished the episode and then he had a skating lesson and I was like mate I'm going to be honest were you there fuck it took loads to not make me cry during that episode he was like yeah me too dad it was a bit much wasn't it but I haven't stopped thinking about Stranger Things since it ended my god I want to watch it all again because there was loads of stuff that I forgot about I think I brought this up actually the cost to end world hunger would be less, would be about$40 billion a year.

16:20It's less than what the world spends on luxury goods in a week. Yeah, I know. Sorry to go out and burr on you. That's true. Sorry to make you feel shitty about yourself just because you might have, you know, you fucking work hard and stuff and you might have treated yourself to a little handbag or something like that. But if you hadn't bought that handbag, you could have solved world hunger.

16:46So you're a bastard That is a cold open It's cold, yeah That's a chilly one A chilly open Jo and James Jo and James Jo and James Facts up again Jo and James Jo and James Jo and James Jo and James Facts up Welcome to Jo and James Facts Up Each week we'll bring each other a fact that we deem interesting and our policies the more interesting the more true it is um it doesn't have to be fact um but it can be true uh we'll also dig into the weird things that you'd like to think are true that don't you don't want to research yourself in the segment we call a fact check so if you do want to send those things in our email is hello at joeandjamespod.com our whatsapp is 07822034330 you can follow us on our socials at joeandjamespod where you can message us there as well.

17:41And you can watch all our episodes on YouTube. Just search for Joe and James Facts Up. Now, let's get Facts Up.

17:52I've got a message here from Jack, who sent us a little WhatsApp. It's called Bad Tea Bagging. What? Well, no, that's Lily May's title. Yeah, yeah, I know. It talks... I honestly forget about what we talk about at the end. instantly at the end of every podcast. I can't remember the, I remember masturbation, I don't remember orange. So basically you asked for, off the back of a letter, which was a guy who used tanning lotion instead of normal lotion. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When masturbating, he his penis went orange. Yes. You asked then for inspiration that people have taken from the in-betweeners. Oh, good idea.

18:30Good idea? It was a good idea. Yeah, good idea. And this message has followed up from that. Okay, fine. Okay, following on from the orange masturbation session chat, because when I saw that I definitely feel like that's something I should remember though yeah I assumed it meant somebody masturbating into an orange yeah that would sting wouldn't it slightly acidic terrible the orange terrible idea pound for pound pound for pound use an onion I don't know just anything at this stage there's more sugar in a strawberry yeah right do I really deaf that's a different it doesn't matter following on from the orange masturbation session chat in the last episode i'd like to it was a few episodes ago um i'd like to share how i was inspired by the by the in-betweener when i was 14 i set the smoke alarm off uh in my kitchen with my run with my mum rushing down the stairs worried and finding me smoking an empty tea bag rolled inside a piece of a4 paper i don't know what that means really mate i don't know it's Well, no, because there's a bit where I believe Donovan says he's selling you drugs.

19:43And you can see that it's tea. Yeah. And we go, oh, that's not drugs. And he makes you say, thank you for the drugs. Thank you for the drugs. What worries me there is less the tea, but the A4 paper. Think of the bleach that's in there and the chemicals and... Cyanide, isn't it? Cyanide in paper, isn't it? Do you know what, right? Is that true? Did you hear that? I was told when I was a kid in primary school in the 90s, don't chew paper. they use it's not true is it they just you can't just lie to children I love the parent not parenting teaching or kind of like child rearing you used to be like if you do that they'll chop your fucking arms off yeah and it'd be like just stop doing it like it's not fair to children just don't lie to them I don't know I think the ends justify the means sometimes that's kind of yeah that's always exactly the opposite I feel like we're actually missing that nowadays because Because they've sort of gone...

20:36No, it's not. Well, one... Because children realise... Because, okay, I was told in Cub Scouts that if I sniffed glue once, I'd definitely die. Yeah. Not true. I'm sure that's not true. I'm sure people have died from sniffing glue. But as a scientific fact, if you chop your head off once, you'll definitely die. Yeah. If you sniff glue once, you won't definitely die. And then what happens is that you realise that they were lying to you. Yeah. And then you have a worse attitude towards drugs because now you're like, well, they were just full of shit anyway, so I won't listen to anything. They become like the boy, ironically, they become like the boy who cried wolf.

21:11They become like the child who lies. And then I'd probably like, we can't trust anything they say. And then adults come back and want children to listen to them. And they're like, well, why should we listen to you? Because you lied the first time around. So if you don't want to be straight with us, forget it. So you can't have it both ways. If you want children to stop listening to you, tell them lies that later on they'll realise were lies. Or if you want them to listen to you, then tell them the truth. By the time you realise it might be too late and what they wanted to get out of it has worked.

21:40Because it's like, oh, don't sniff glue because then... It works in the short term. It doesn't work in the long term. Then you'll end up on heroin or something like that. It doesn't work in the short term, but it... So it works in the short term, but it doesn't work in the long term. Like, if you say to children, don't go into the forest because there's a Tyrannosaurus rex that lives in there, it'll work until they realise that there isn't a Tyrannosaurus rex that lives in there. And then they'll be like, there's no Tyrannosaurus rexes anywhere. no risks they were lying and there are risks and like that's what i that's what i think isn't it the same as sort of fables little lessons to learn i think they're clearly analogies though i don't i think i think that i think the i think the sense that um i yeah i don't know every child knows i didn't mind a hare or a tortoise in hindsight i didn't mind being lied to to be honest with you because it kept me kept me sort of straight and narrow it kept me sort of on on the good path For quite a long time, only very recently did I realise that if you sit close to the television, you don't get square eyes.

22:36You don't get square eyes. I think it's bad for your eyesight, though. I don't know if that's fact. Why don't they say that, then? Because if you say, because what you do, what happens is you're like, well, my eyes didn't go square. So you can sit as close. So my conclusion is you can sit as close to the television as you want. You might ruin your eyesight. Apparently, sitting too close to the TV won't permanently damage your eyes, but it can cause temporary eye strain, dryness or headache. okay right see i don't do i don't do any of that with my kids yeah i do think there is something for well until my kids came along because i was quite young in my family i've got a younger sister but i was one of the of all my cousins are older than me pretty much um some of them are like way older than me as well and i was quite young in my family yeah um so until i had kids myself yeah i i it'd been a long long time since i've been around babies and children and i've never spoken to my kids like that yeah i've been like don't do that and they'll be like why and i go well because you just look like an idiot yeah well that's much better like i just say stuff like like i've never sort of like yeah tricked them into anything i've just been like i yeah i just You're like, mate, leave that out.

23:54Completely. Like, why? Because it's annoying. Because it's annoying. Yeah. Yeah. If you keep bashing that spoon on the table, it's a really annoying noise. It's really irritating. Like, it's just... Whereas I think if I was a kid, it was like, don't bash that spoon on that table. Otherwise, the devil will come. Yeah. The police will come and arrest daddy. Yeah. That sort of thing. Well, those police. Yeah. But I do think I've always had, like, yeah, I suppose I sort of disagreed with you. And now I'm agreeing with you again. Just looking at my relationship with my kids, which I genuinely think, I don't think I'm a good dad or anything like that.

24:30I think I'm a... I'm sure you're a very good dad. No, but I think I'm a dad because now that I'm a dad, you then go, oh, yeah, my parents didn't fucking know what they were doing either. Yeah, that is unbelievable. I think I'm just sort of like quite comfortable with... Like even sometimes when I don't have the answer for something, I'll be like, I don't know. I don't know, but I just know that we shouldn't do that. Yeah. I just know, like, I just think we shouldn't do that. Just trust me on this one. It's quite... I'm just going to have to play my just trust me card on this one. And I do. That's how I've, like, brought my kids up.

25:05And Claire's the same as well. We've never sort of... We've just always spoken to them like they were sort of had, even when they were babies. But I do the same with my dog as well. I talk to my dog like I'm having a conversation with him. I'm just like oh mate we can't do that I'm sorry and Claire's like why are you explaining that to the dog yeah oh you can't go on the grass they've just put some chemicals down on it and I don't want you getting sick he's like he doesn't understand any of that sentence but I think he looks at me like he does they look like they understand it I'm convinced he's gone and he does wink at me sometimes by the way and Claire will back me up on this one sometimes he'll be across the other side of the room and you just look at him and he just goes like that

25:55it is funny with dogs though because I was once doing a I attended a not Crufts but a Crufts like event and when the dogs went wrong half falcon half human now get that dog out of my sight get that dog out of my sight and when the dogs made a mistake some of the owners were going oh you stupid a fucking twat. Right. And I was getting quite upset. I was like, well, they shouldn't be calling the dog a twat. No. And then someone else went, well, the dog doesn't know that that's, and actually, it was quite right. And I think I probably was being sentimental. I don't think the dog isn't offended. Maybe.

26:36Again, I don't know what it says about me. Well, I do call my dog a little prick every now and again. I really think the dog, I can't believe I'm even saying, I don't think the dog understands the word. But when I say it, I think he does understand it. he will know your tone oh you've been a little prick there mate why are you doing that it's interesting how much of a bond we have with animals and it makes us realize how little language and the semantic meaning of language really matters see i do i genuinely feel like sometimes like that dog's the only person i was about to say yeah like the only thing that likes me in the house a dog like i do sort of like i do like when i've annoyed claire enough uh and the kids can't be arsed with me i'm like i still got you mate thanks well i appreciate that it's an ancient bond like dogs have lived among humans for thousands of years yeah and i don't know whether that has any kind of actual scientific meaning to it i mean as in i know it's thousands of years but i don't know whether it seeps into our dna or something i don't know how that worked but it feels like there's a very clear...

27:47They are companions. And I will argue that they do know what you're saying. They do know what you're saying. Because there's certain things that I say to the dog and he answers me back. He does. I know what you mean. I say to him, I say the word, do you want a sound to eat? And he barks. And I go and get him his food. So he barks. Yeah, I'm sure he can identify the sound. Yeah. Eat. Right? I would have thought so. I mean, they can hear different whistles, can't they? When it's the sheepdog. So they've got an ability to sort between different noises. He obviously doesn't know. He wouldn't know that it would have any meaning as in written language.

28:27But like, yeah, he would know. There's phrases that he understands. I imagine they're also able to distinguish different patterns of kind of physical arrangement of the humans in the room. like they can see how something this is these humans are about to leave for a walk because they are doing the kind of types of movement that they do when they're going to get their coats or something but obviously they wouldn't know it was getting to get coats but they would they would recognize exactly what you mean the way in which the kind of shoal of humans is kind of moving and coming back together and moving like there must be different patterns that they recognize it is a bit of a problem actually because you know what you were saying the other day there on the podcast about how you'd pick your daughter up at half 11.

29:13Yeah. And everyone can tell you're just freshly shattered by that point. Yeah, so I haven't got anything done. Which, by the way, I would do the exact same. In the morning school run, I'd look like fucking shit. Yeah, that's just about... And then the afternoon pick-up, I'd look like I'd got my shit together. But that's just because I can't... Like, in the morning, it's like, I've got to get this one. I can't, the brain can't handle getting me ready as well. I need to focus on getting this guy ready right now. I remember little bits of controversy around parents delivering their children to school still in their pyjamas as in the parents.

29:50And thinking, what's all that about? And now I'm like, oh, I can see. I can see there is a temptation to just kind of not really bothered. But also, if I have to leave the house, I could get ready in 10 minutes. Yeah. They can't. No. They just can't. It's a thing. It's a whole thing. Yeah, it's a big deal. Yeah, right. But what you were saying, so now because of my life, because I've got such a great, I don't mean to brag, but I've got a really fucking good life, right? I've manoeuvred work where I can just do it from home pretty much, unless I'm doing the podcast. Yeah. So whenever I'm dressed or got a jacket on, the dog's like, fuck it, is this it?

30:33We're going out. are we going out we must be going out because he's usually just in his fucking in the same jogging bomb as he's been wearing for the last four days yeah he's put some new clothes on we must be going out for a walk now yeah and i have to explain to him i'm going no i'm just i do have to pop out but i'm just i'm not taking you with me mate sorry you once told me that you were going to the tip so much yeah every time you left the house your kids were like are you going to the tip yeah yeah yeah i love the tip i love it as well i have a chat with them yeah um i was asked i always have a question and they're good can you recycle um you know soft plastics here i spend about can't actually i spend about 10 minutes getting rid of all the stuff out my car and about 20 minutes just chatting i just have a little look at all the different hoppers to the lads down the chip down the tip i'd love to work in the tip it does stink that's the only thing Mine's really good, man.

31:29Mine does have a bin smell. And it would. Mine doesn't smell at all. I remember as a kid going to the dump was like, fucking yeah, let's go. And it was just a great big, like it was a great big building with glassless windows, I'd call it. Okay. Where you would just chuck things and it would just like crash. you're allowed to do so many things that you're not normally allowed to do like I've got a load of glass here what should I do go and smash the fuck out of it really yeah you meant to you'll be annoyed if you don't do it you're like oh yeah right yeah it's really good there's another little area my dump where I go to is very because I'm there so much for some reason I don't know I'll be chatting to one of the blokes that work there and someone will come up to me and be like, where does this, where does small appliances go?

32:30And I have to stop myself from answering. I let them answer. And then they'll walk off and I'll just be like, first day here, is it? That must get annoying. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there's a fucking sign. How much clearer can you make it? But I'm like, yeah. They'll go, what you got? What you got today, James? I go, I got mostly cardboard, bit of general, bit of glass in there as well. so um i'll head to 7 12 and 16 shall i and they're like yeah you know you did yeah yeah i was there yesterday the diary i was at the dump yesterday i've got yeah i've got that kind of diary as well but there's nothing in it and then the only thing for an entire month is like fridge but sometimes sometimes i've got sometimes i've got a lot i've got so much cardboard i'm always there for cardboard and claire's like oh i've got a load of cardboard can you take it away i go yeah that's like the one thing i can do yeah and then when i get there and look in the back of the car look in the cardboard and there's some fucking bubble wrap or something like that fuck's sake claire they're not gonna have it down here they're not gonna put up with that shit so i separate the bubble wrap from the yeah the um a composite most people would just chuck that in wouldn't they they would just no there's a code yeah there's the dump code and um you know composite packaging is really annoying work there i feel like i'd be happy working there

34:03back to school is busy enough the last thing you need is shopping that makes it harder whether you're moving into a dorm your first apartment or just getting organized for the semester wayfair makes it easy to get everything you need in one place furniture bedding storage decor, study essentials, all at prices you'll love with fast shipping before move-in day. Get everything you need for back-to-school season. Shop Wayfair.com today. Wayfair, every style, every home. Hello, I'm Monica Reinagle, host of the Nutrition Diva podcast. Summer is here and with it, the hot and sticky weather. A morning working in the garden or maybe on the golf course can leave you more depleted than you realize.

34:43And plain water isn't always the most efficient way to restore the balance. That's where Liquid IV comes in. Its science-backed formula is clinically proven to hydrate faster than water alone. Whether you're exercising, playing outside, or simply surviving a summer heat wave, it's an easy way to stay hydrated. Shop now at liquidiv.com. Liquid IV, hydration that goes wherever life takes you. Hi, my name's Addis DeGroon. Are you going to say your name or just have a massive pause? Oh, God, that was revile. My name's Rachel, yeah, Stomachs. It's a podcast that we make. It's called Don't Think So Somehow.

35:19And all we do is bicker. It's largely pointless. We don't really get on or even enjoy doing it. I got ID'd for alcohol the other day. You're joking. Yeah, in Leeds. That's mad. It's like ID and Judi Dench. This might just be a podcast for you. Don't Think So Somehow. Every time I get a message saying, I'm loving the new podcast. I'm like, why? Why? I like... Oh, dear.

35:50Joe and James, Facts Up! Today we're serving up some sporting facts for one another. Was that in the script? Yeah. Serving up. You're welcome. Nice, actually. There's loads of sports going on at the moment. As of transmission. Yep, as of transmission. Premier League transfer window closes. Winter Olympics, men's Six Nations. I love the Six Nations. You do. You do love the Six Nations. That's my favourite. I love, yeah. I just have too much PTSD with rugby. Because you had to do it at school. Yeah, and I was tiny. And it was just like getting beaten up on a fucking rainy morning. morning. I definitely derive pleasure from watching sport and part of me thinking I'm so fucking pleased that I have to do that.

36:45I quite like watching a run. I always watch a marathon and it's people just going

36:53and I'm like I'm so fucking pleased I'm on a fucking run. Are they happy? I know. Well that's the thing. Are they thinking what the fuck am I doing? I really love the ice hockey. I'm always banging on about the Chieftains I nearly had a puck backed I found a better one I was talking to a mate of mine Cam Bartlett who's one of the players and he was just telling me about how much he loves it how much he loves playing ice hockey and I was like well you'd have to you'd absolutely have to I was like I could be Wayne Gretzky I could be the most gifted hockey player to ever exist I could be the greatest hockey player ever you fucking splatter me up against the wall, like shove me up against the wall, or I get hit by a puck or something like that.

37:42I'm like, I'm not doing this next week. I'm not doing it. You've got to really, really love it. When I go ice skating, which I did over Christmas, of course, this is when we go to the rinks, don't we? When we stagger about. I've got to be honest, it was annoying. because my kids, between the two of them, honestly, I'm at the ice rink at least five days a week. So they're good. Right. And they go there and they're learning to ice skate. One of them's playing ice hockey now. And so we're there all the time. December, they were just like, can't even skate. Fucking mobbed. And it's a bit like those people that only turn up to mass on Christmas.

38:33Yeah. My dad used to be like, yeah, where have these lot been all year round, eh? Yeah. We can't even get in. We're standing at the back. We're just watching from the back now. It's absolutely mobbed. And we're real fans. Yeah. I can see that that would be annoying. If I was an ice hockey player... My youngest was well annoyed. I couldn't even go fast. Couldn't even move, Dad. I was like, it'd be fine. Don't worry about it. I'm in a five-a-side team and I'm the worst player. You're coxie. Coxie. I'm the worst player on the team. We won 8-1 last night and I could tell that the other team's entire strategy was like, get it to their right back because he's the weakest.

39:18We can exploit that. And I was like, you're right. Like the only goal they scored. If you're playing right back and you scored eight and only let one in, I think you're doing all right. You must have been busy. you must have been working hard they carried me whenever I got the ball I bet Cox is good I bet he's half decent he's so good that it actually demoralises the other team right like we always there's always a point about two thirds of the way through the game I assumed that where we're like we can see them we can see their hearts starting to break because they're like we can't score like we these are good shots these should be going in that's why he's a well he's literally a director like that's his job he directs TV shows and stuff so I I assumed he knows what he's doing He's pretty handy on the five-a-side pitch.

40:02But I would be the worst player in an ice hockey team as well, is my point. And do you think, would eyebrows be raised if I came on and I did have a little penguin to lean on that they have for Christmas? No, go, that's Simon. That's Simon from the Inbetweeners. I'm such a soft touch. The last night, someone came over to me on the pitch and went, Simon. And I was like, oh, and I hadn't seen him before. And I was like, oh, yeah, hello. and actually I did say my name's Joe you know whatever I said once Simon and he was like oh are you playing with us and I was like oh yeah I guess I guess I am and I was and I was about to go over and then my team were like what the fuck are you doing Joe and I was like that's it I'm so pliable I was on the I'm so glad it was just another it was another game that was on at the same time as my game and I was literally on the verge of being like yeah I'll play I'll play for you I don't know oh I guess I can't because I don't know how you haven't joined a cult or anything yet.

40:58You would be so easy to recruit. And you'd drag Hannah. Poor Hannah. Hannah would be going, what the fuck is going on here? What are we doing here? I sometimes think Hannah's main job in life is to keep me out of cults.

41:20She's kind of there. Because you'd start wandering off and then she'd just grab your hand and go, no, no, no, come back. No, no, no. Come on. Yeah. Take a beat. Yeah. Just have a think. Yeah. Do you want to live on a farm? Yeah. Do you want to help with the sugar beet harvest every day? But we are doing... What are we talking about? We are doing... Yeah, we're doing sporting facts. I believe you've got a sporting fact for me, Joe. I think this is one of my favourite facts I've done. All right. between 1912 and 1948 one of the medal things you could meddle in at the olympics was art they gave up medals for art and it was part of this idea that being an olympia the olympiad was supposed to be a celebration of like a 360 degree view of humanity all the things that humans excel at and so they only stopped doing it yeah because i just when i think of the olympics I think of strength and speed.

42:25But you don't think of the fine application of a 2B pencil. So this is a guy who won. It's very soft. That's a soft one. Yeah. You got in real trouble at my school if you tried to use an HB because they'd say that's just a pencil you happened to be holding at the time. And I'd say, yeah. HB is the standard. That's what you use. No, HB is the standard that you use. I would say the HB pencil is probably the best pencil that ever existed. I'm going out. Come at me in the comments. Comment your favourite pencil. Yeah, let us know what your favourite pencil. Where is it? To be or not to be. Anyway.

43:08Oh, no. So here we are. So Jean, I think it's probably Jean Jacobi. Can I just say that that to be or not to be joke was just me desperately trying to fill time while Joe was trying to find his fact. I got it now. I was felt under pressure there. So don't. It's happened now. Yeah. Staying in. It's out there. It's out there. Jean-Jacques B. Jean-Claude Jacob B. Jean-Lucien Nicolas. Jean-Claude Jacob B with his jacket on. Jacob B or Jacques not to be. he won Olympic gold medals in the Olympic art competitions of 1924 and 1928 making him the most successful Olympic artist ever and we can probably put this it's quite sweet the one that won him a gold medal in 1928 is this drawing I'll show you there it is right and it's called rugby and it's two blokes playing rugby yeah it is good it's a good picture it's good I like it it's good yeah I mean I'd say is that him that's him there self portrait look he's good you're gonna have to send these pictures to Lily May I'll send them and if you're not watching check us out on YouTube thank you we'll put it in our carousel our Friday carousel as well sure so on social media okay yeah

44:36he only They stopped giving out the medals because they were beginning to be won exclusively by professional artists. And the Olympics was supposed to be for amateurs. Yes. Which is interesting because obviously now the Olympics is not amateurs anymore either, is it? Well, I don't know, man. I don't think you get paid to be in the Olympics. Okay. All right. I think you can cash in. Just a bit. You win yourself a gold medal or something. Yeah. there's a little carrot at the end of the tunnel to quote Stuart Pearce. Yeah. Right? Is that what he said? I think he said that's one of his punditry. It's a carrot at the end of the tunnel.

45:18Right? Can you look that up for me, Lily, man? I think that's a Stuart Pearce quote. It's like how you catch a rabbit. Yeah. It's blurred now, isn't it? Because the USA basketball team turn up and it's fucking LeBron James and Steph Curry and stuff like that. And the rest of the world are going, well, why are we bothering? Why are we going to bother turning up to try and win gold in basketball? Stuart Pearce did use that. Can you remind me? Does it say anything about the context that you used in? It basically says that it's, well, it's obviously a mashup of carrot and stick and end of the tunnel.

46:02I remember I do like I do love my and I got that from a book actually Joe has that impressed you? It does There was a book of like funny punditry quotes sporting quotes and that one stuck with me for some reason there's a carrot at the end of the tunnel I remember I was listening to Talk Sport years ago and Stan Collymore was on it and it's fair to say I don't think he's the brightest bulb in the shed and

46:40he was going you know they should have passion it should just be coming out of them from every and I was going as I was driving the car listening to him talk I was going poor, poor and he went orifice

46:59and i was and i was going i knew you were gonna say orifice stan i knew you were gonna say that yeah there aren't that many orifices is the problem no if it was coming out even if it coming out every orifice that's still not very much passion it's still not enough i was like i was shouting i was talking out loud as well i was in the car on my own going poor orifice oh it's um so any so so yeah i like the fact that he won for a drawing called rugby so they're quite like it's like does it still have to be sporty yeah i suppose yeah i mean it's a pretty good it's a pretty good drawing the thing that we can all agree with on the olympics is is that it is just heaviest longest fastest everything's measured everything's everything Everything has an absolute.

47:50Everything's like, that was faster than fucking hell. I'd be interested to know. That was faster than that. The art, art is subjective, isn't it? I don't like the idea of judging art. I don't like, you know, because of, well, because of the industry that I work in, it's great if somebody finds something that I did funny. Yeah. also on the flip side if you're like Katie and you didn't find it funny that's absolutely fine as well if you hated it I'd never take it personally which is good because she told you didn't she she did she said that was fucking shit I hate this but yeah you can't take heart personally can you so it's weird that they did.

48:46And I didn't even know that at all whatsoever that art was in the Olympics. That's an interesting fact though, Joe. They did. He had it for art. They did. For some time, and I only stopped doing it, not because art is not a sport, but because it was too many, it was becoming dominated by professionals. I've never been massively into the Olympics. I find it a bit hard to get into. Because I like football, right? but Olympics I don't I've never been into the Olympics because like it's like football but without the ball yeah so I can imagine why people don't like football and I'm like well imagine if you also just got rid of the ball and it was just blokes running from one end to the other this is probably really rude to athletics but to me it seems like football is like a meal where like eight or nine ingredients have been brought together into a whole and it's as though somebody's just separated them all out and gone there you go there's the tablespoon full of flour that was in it yeah there's the teaspoon of salt that was in there's the running there's the kicking yeah it's just been separated out yeah maybe it's purer there's the throwing there probably is also extraordinary narrative within it and stories and stuff i just think that every football match is a little bit like a little mini story in and of itself that's quite i do like that i do like the like i i always enjoyed the off the pitch stuff more than football.

50:13It's the same with me with boxing as well. I absolutely love boxing, but I guess I'm a sort of... I'm not a pure sort of... I like the sort of pageantry. Is there anything you'd like to add to the Olympics? I'd like... Jigsaw puzzles? Jigsaw puzzles. I'd like food challenges or something like that. Eating challenges. Yeah. Hot wings. Yeah. I'd like that. I'd really love that. Your classic sort of... We don't do... That's what we need to do. You hear about them all the time in America. The hot dog challenge. How many hot dogs you can have in like half an hour or something. Can we do a fact up special?

51:02Can we arrange that? Do you guys do a food challenge? No, we do. No, not just us. We do it for the public. if you think you're good at eating hot dogs we host a hot dog eating competition Fact Up Olympics Fact Up Olympics is actually Fact Up Olympics, yeah We'll have a little torch Yeah We'll carry it into this building People lighting their fags off it Yeah Before the event Before the football How many cigarettes can you smoke in there? Yeah yeah half hour or so who can get to the end of their vape first yeah we're good yeah how much beer can Buckley drink yeah in one episode

51:51it is time for fact check where we'll be reading a fact or question that you'd like us to get to the bottom of then we're gonna have a little think during the break and we'll come back to let you know how true it feels to us to decide if it passes our fact check er Joe have you oh go on introduce well yeah i'm i'm i'm merely going to introduce a voice note from sean hi joe and james doing a great job with the podcast i've got something i'd like you to check out if it's a fact or not so where i'm from we've got a saying if someone is trying to be too nice or pull the wool over your eyes a little bit we say they're blowing smoke up our ass and apparently the saying comes from when people drowned it was an approved medical thing to revive them to get a tobacco and a pipe and blow smoke up their ass um apparently we had stations along the other thames it sounds a bit unbelievable but i wondered if you could check if it was a fact or not if it is true how did it then become a almost like pleasuring someone or pulling the wool over their eyes how did it evolve from that to that yeah i'll leave you with that one guys i'm sure you'll make sense of it well you're right to say we will thank you sean we'll we will get to the bottom of that uh literally uh after these messages

53:31Back to school is busy enough. The last thing you need is shopping that makes it harder. Whether you're moving into a dorm, your first apartment, or just getting organized for the semester, Wayfair makes it easy to get everything you need in one place. Furniture, bedding, storage, decor, study essentials, all at prices you'll love. with fast shipping before move-in day. Get everything you need for back-to-school season. Shop Wayfair.com today. Wayfair, every style, every home. Hello, I'm Monica Reinagle, host of the Nutrition Diva podcast. Summer is here and with it, the hot and sticky weather.

54:06A morning working in the garden or maybe on the golf course can leave you more depleted than you realize. And plain water isn't always the most efficient way to restore the balance. That's where Liquid IV comes in. Its science-backed formula is clinically proven to hydrate faster than water alone. Whether you're exercising, playing outside, or simply surviving a summer heat wave, it's an easy way to stay hydrated. Shop now at liquidiv.com. Liquid IV, hydration that goes wherever life takes you. Hi, my name's Alistair Green. Are you going to say your name or just have a massive pause? Oh God, that was revile.

54:43My name's Rachel, yeah, Stomachs. It's a podcast that we make. It's called Don't Think So Somehow. And all we do is bicker. It's largely pointless. We don't really get on or even enjoy doing it. I got ID'd for alcohol the other day. You're joking. Yeah, in Leeds. That's mad. It's like ID and Judi Dench. This might just be a podcast for you. Don't Think So Somehow. Every time I get a message saying I'm loving the new podcast, I'm like, why? Why?

55:23anyway we are back right so james we had that voice note just there from yeah bloody good voice note if i may say really good really nice yeah um i began kind of talking into it as though he was here expecting him to come back yeah so that's just quite a stupid thing for me to do yeah and good question as well where does the phrase blowing smoke up someone's yeah ass yeah come from and now and is it to do with blowing tobacco smoke up their ass when i was at school we believed that if somebody needed to be revived in the jungle or whatever that means what you did was you shoved a cigar up their arse.

56:12That caused a huge influx of nicotine and brought them back from the brink. But don't be thinking you could swap the cigar for a cigarette because if you put a cigarette up there they'd die. No, it'd have to be a little caff creme. Probably something you'd got from the Thermador. Yeah. and so I you'd smash the thermidor open smash the thermidor open in an emergency yeah and the lobsters are like what's going on you're like haven't got time to explain guys hand me that and they go and you go oh let me get it and they were just chopping all the time they go and grab and they go oh no oh

56:59that's probably why lobsters don't smoke to be fair innit they would just keep chopping the cigarette wouldn't they they want to they do they're desperate for a fact they want to please can I just have a cigarette so love's on death row give them their last cigarette which is also their first yeah and they say that's nice and you go alright time to die anyway family behind the screen in the pot it's now illegal to boil live lobsters without giving them a fag without giving them a cigarette first in some states no it is I think it's been like the last couple of weeks or so I think it's been a sort of the world who's decided that?

57:47let's have a little look it's been it's been a yeah it's now yeah in last month it was made well banned yeah for yeah you can't boil lobsters alive anymore yeah It's weird that they were like, oh, they don't feel it. It's fine. It's weird that that was, no, it's fine. It's fine. Because also it was like, oh, you hear them scream as well. Like lobster's like scream when you throw them in body water. And they're going, oh, no, that's just, that's fine. They don't feel it. When they said they don't feel it, I think what those people meant was we don't feel it, which is a mistake I've noticed quite a lot of people make in lots of different circumstances.

58:27They're like, no, look, honestly, it's no big deal. and you're like, do you mean for you? Won't all the other lobsters be worried when you're there? They won't remember.

58:39So you can't do that anymore. I think you'd have to say, fair enough. Right. So listen, our fact check. We're trying to, they're blowing smoke up the arse. Can you revive someone who's drowned by blowing tobacco smoke? And that's where it came from. Joe's school taught him that you need to shove a cigar up the bum. But presumably not lit. or I think maybe you light it once it's up. Right. Now, this has got me thinking, right? So blowing smoke up the arse, right? I think that's derived from kissing someone's arse. Okay. By sucking up to them. As in brown nose. Brown nosing, yeah. Disgusting phrase, isn't it?

59:21So I think the phrase kissing someone's arse came before blowing smoke up their arse because I feel like it's like at a time where everyone would smoke cigarettes they'd be like oh you're just blowing smoke up their arse now because you just naturally have a fag on or something okay maybe so yeah I think and can I offer another go on little angle on this yeah these because you calm them down by not true carry on no go on carry on okay I'm about to fact your brains out here please well so you can't so what you were about to say was that you calm you can't you calm them down by the bellows and you get the smoke right I've seen I've seen Megan do it on a documentary who's Megan Megan out of Harry and Megan oh Harry and Megan Megan Harry and Megan Megan right not true not true why are they not true not true right so it does right it doesn't calm them down so I've just done a film which comes out soon which I will be mentioning in the next couple of episodes constantly doing another Christmas because I want you to go and watch it but I've just done a film where I play a beekeeper what are the chances right I've stumbled into blundered into I had to spend a day with these bees and I fucking loved it absolutely loved it with a proper beekeeper because we felt it was important that I knew what you do around bees and I had no experience and I was lifting these hives up and stuff where they make their honey and you pull these slats out, they're so heavy when they're full of bees like, because it adds up you can't imagine the weight of thousands of bees right yeah and for the purposes of the film that's exciting isn't it the bellows and the smoke and stuff it looks great on film smoke looks great on film you look like a beekeeper and I was doing a lot of that when we were making the film he was going if we're going for realism you probably wouldn't do that and the director was like don't care about realism that just looks good that looks good that looks great on camera maybe stay in your lane and I was going bee guy I was going yeah that looks really exciting all that stuff I want to keep all that in.

1:01:53It's really good. But he was going, I'll be honest with you. And I said what you said. I said, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because that calms them down, doesn't it? He said it doesn't calm them down. What it does is it disrupts their communication. Okay. It stops them from being able to talk to each other. The pheromones and the things, pheromones, just through there. No. The signals that they give off to each other get... Cut. So if anything, it confuses them. It doesn't calm them down. It confuses them. Are you looking this up, Lily Mae? Because also I might have dreamt this conversation. Right. Okay.

1:02:39Are you in a film? Yes. That's not a dream as well. I feel like that's what the bloke told me. But I was really excited. Like you've been around me on film sets. I do get a bit gung-ho and a bit excited about stuff. I know, and if there's this stuff... Yeah. I don't want to have a go at film sets, but they can be a bit boring as well. So if there's a toy, then you're going to want to play with it. And I do feel like this bloke was talking to me and I was saying the word yeah a lot to him. I've got here that... I was going, yeah, yeah, yeah. Smoke interferes with the bee's primary form of communication, smell.

1:03:11Yes, that's it. Right. Yes. So it doesn't calm them down necessarily, but it stops them, you know, it's like... So it does help. And it does say they emit strong smelling pheromones. So you were right about pheromones as well. So I'm great. I'm correct. I'm right. About that. Yes, you're right about that. So it does calm them down. And this chap, he sounds like a lovely man, I think he's being a little bit pedantic. No, no, no. He's a beekeeper. He knows what he's talking about. It doesn't calm them down. It just stops them from being organised. It's like cutting the communications of the army.

1:03:54Does it make the beekeeper's job easier? I don't think it does. Why are people doing it if it doesn't help? I think it's a last ditch thing that you'd do. Okay. The smoke stuff. Okay. So maybe slightly, maybe Megan, who's maybe not as advanced a beekeeper. I don't know, but maybe not as advanced a beekeeper as this beekeeper. but maybe she's been a bit trigger happy. Yeah. Just wants to use it. Right. I can't even remember whether she was using it. She had a beekeeper there as well. Right. But in her defence, if you want to talk about feature beekeeping in TV or film, they want the glamour. They want the glamour shot of all the smoke and all the dramatisation of that.

1:04:42I'd like to do a shot, most dramatic scene ever. It's on a steam train platform. and everyone's smoking and there's a beekeeper there. Imagine how fucking dramatic that would be. Yeah, during the fire of London. And it's foggy. That would look great on film. That would look so good. Look at that in the IMAX. I'm surprised Nolan hasn't written a scene like that. That's 4D. That's 4D, yeah. That's 4D. It's coming out of the bellows. And in the cinema, someone will light a little fire. A little fire. the fourth dimension is fire but Sean back to your I think the blowing smoke up the arse derives from kissing someone's arse I don't think that it was ever a fact or a misconception that you could revive you could give mouth to arse if someone was drowning yeah a guy gave me mouth to us once

1:05:49weirdly I wasn't um I wasn't feeling unwell or anything he was going you're drowning you're drowning and you were going I'm not I said I feel all right it was like yeah but better safe than sorry yeah um I honestly think it's a little bit like the Stuart Pierce carrot at the end of the because I think it's a kind of mash-up I think there's a few I think it's a mash-up of smoke screen and kissing an arse or something what i would like to get into is the origin of kissing an arse well what that means is basically i'm sorry to come in quite so aggressively there but but i just think that means that you i think that's like if you are too in awe of somebody yeah you have forgotten that they too go to the toilet fart have a bum it's almost like you have started to think that even their shit doesn't stink to kind of crib that phrase and and i think it's that sense of like you shouldn't kiss anyone's ass no nobody is an angel everybody still farts and burps and goes to the toilet and if you have started to forget that about somebody you have put them on too high a pedestal and you've lost your ability to to judge them and i I think, and so, yeah, so that's, kissing arse, I think, comes from that.

1:07:11Do you think blowing smoke up someone's arse comes off of the back of that, though? That's what I'm saying. Yes. Yeah. I'm thinking of, like, I don't know what period of history, Mad Men, that's sort of where everyone's got a cigarette on the go, and you'd be kissing their arse so much that you'd actually start blowing smoke up them in the assumption that you would definitely have a cigarette as well because everyone smokes at this point because it's good for you. I'm also not convinced that reviving somebody is really an analogue for stroking their ego. If I was flattering you loads, you wouldn't go, oh, you're just trying to give me CPR.

1:07:58It just doesn't quite feel like the same type of thing. Right. Are we saying not fact? Are we saying not fact? I think we're going not fact. Not fact. Has it been not fact for a while now? When was the last time we agreed with a fact with someone? Was it last episode? Did you not agree with the last one? Did we? I can't remember. I can't remember. Let's have a look. Let me quit. Well, literally the last episode. Yeah. As in the one that we did today. Yeah, it's quite a worm in half. No, did you believe that a worm, if you cut it in half, it stays alive? No. No, okay. No, we believed it stays alive.

1:08:40We didn't believe that it creates two worms. Yeah. Okay, so half fact there then. Half agreed. Yeah. That's at least two episodes in a row where we've gone... Yeah, you're non-believers. I also think we're now starting to turn stuff down. You're not basing it on if it's interesting. We're not basing it on whether it's interesting or not. You're just doing it on whether you think it's true. I think we actually should say this is... No, no, but also that's what comes into, in my brain, the interesting part is that it might be true. That's the most interesting part about a fact. Making it conceivable.

1:09:12Yeah. I don't think this one is. It was very funny, though. I also think it would be incredibly difficult to genuinely blow smoke up someone's arse. Yeah. Into their mouth. Yeah. Gross as well. Well, we're saying not fact. We're saying not fact on that one, Lily May. Okay. Thank you, Sean. Thank you, Sean. What's Queen Lily May got to say about it? So the Queen's decree is that there was a thing once upon a time called a tobacco smoke enema, which was used up the rectum as a medical treatment for people potentially who had drowned or become cold or were drowsy. And the phrase blowing smoke does come from that, because it was sort of quite ineffective.

1:10:01So the idea is blowing smoke up someone's arse is ineffective. I see. Amazing. So it's crazy because it doesn't work. You're creating an illusion. You're trying to big someone up, make them better than what they are. Okay, you're a snake oil salesman. Yeah. So it's insincere. It doesn't work. Yeah. So it's the same as blowing smoke up someone's arse because it's kind of pointless and insincere. So it is a fact. It is a fact, but it's not fact up. It's not. It didn't pass your fact check and that's okay. That's all that matters. Wow. Gosh. Thanks, Sean. Yeah. Cheers for that. Yeah. A rare example of some actual information.

1:10:40Yeah. If there's anything that you'd like us to fact check, head to our episode's description for all the ways to get in touch. Have you got a sporting factor? Throw in for us, James. Yes, I do. Maybe at the stumps? I do. From the field? to see if you can run out one of the other team's batsmen. It's a sporting fact about a Japanese athlete who I'm almost certain I will get their name wrong. Okay. And I don't... I hate getting people's names wrong.

1:11:15Shiso Kanakuri. Okay. Shiso Kanakuri. It's not obviously wrong. In the 1912 Olympics, Japanese marathon runner Shizo Kanakuri started the race in Stockholm and then vanished. That is not cool. Hang on. Yeah. Going to get to the bottom of this now. What actually happened? He collapsed from exhaustion in the heat. A local Swedish family took him in. He felt embarrassed and quietly returned to Japan. Officials assumed he'd gone missing and was possibly dead. Fast forward 54 years. Something he didn't do. In 1966, Sweden invited him back and asked him to officially finish the marathon. Oh, Sweden, you starling country.

1:12:12So he crossed the line and recorded the greatest Olympic time in history. 54 years 8 months 6 days 5 hours and 32 minutes his official comment it was a long run

1:12:30talking about a bad day at work oh wow talking about a rough day at work that's really good Sweden comes out of it very well yeah I think that's what I'd do not the Sweden bit I'd also just be like I can just not tell anyone yeah I would as well I love them there's a lot about Japanese culture that just rings a bell with me that I can get on board with I think a lot of English people feel that way I think we like the fact that there is a sense of etiquette, manners and also I think quite a lot of repression. Yeah, we don't want to be any trouble. We don't want to tell you our true feelings about Stam.

1:13:24Yeah, yeah. We'll just quietly go back to Japan. Anyway, Joe, I'm all fact out. I'm fact. I don't know about you. What have we learned today, Joe? We've learned that art was once an Olympic sport. Yeah. It was included in the Olympics. We've learnt that blowing smoke up someone's arse came from people actually blowing tobacco smoke up. Tobacco enema. Yeah. But the reason it's now in common parlance is because it was known to not feel effective. Phony. It was false and phony. And we've also learnt that a Japanese bloke took 50 odd years to finish a marathon once. don't forget that you can get in touch still better than my time in the London Marathon well you did the marathon didn't you and then you lost and then you couldn't keep up your phone ran out of battery my phone was about to run out of battery and also I couldn't find a signal so it wasn't logging my distance so the last half a kilometre took me like 45 minutes because it just couldn't find a satellite and not because I was going to tell you literally I've got evidence that I did run more than before anyone that's it that's it we're done we are done we'll be back next week armed with some more facts, chats and wing attacks what was that from?

1:14:46what was that from? it's just a sporting position a wing attack? a wing attack oh okay yes of course and don't forget I won't bother next week no no we forgot look we just forgot the theme of the episode it was a big deal don't forget that you can get in touch with us if you'd like us to fact check something that feels true to you or whatever nonsense you'd like to tell us by emailing us oh hello tell us hello what did you say us at joeandjamespod.com our whatsapp number is 07822 034 330 or you can follow us on social media at joeandjamespod and head to the podcast description if you've already forgotten those details that's another podcast episode done it was a rubbish one like the one before gold medal and next week's one is probably going to be rubbish as well imagine how bad that else is going to be yeah bye bye guys

1:15:38I thought that was a good one James, fucked up!

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1:17:32Why? I like it there