Joe And A Show

0:01I know you want to get into this episode of Facked Up, but just before we do, you're going to want to hear this first. On Help I Sexted My Boss, quite the mystery is unfolding as Jordan North's microwave has been stolen by one of his mates. It's not exactly something you can sneak out of the house easily. You're going to want to hear how the boys unpack this drama. Search for Sexted and get the episode lined up to play next.

0:29The more you listen to your kids, the closer you'll be. So we asked kids, what do you want your parents to hear? I feel sometimes that I'm not listened to. I would just want you to listen to me more often and evaluate situations with me and lead me towards success. Listening is a form of love. Find resources to help you support your kids and their emotional well-being at SoundItOutTogether.org. That's SoundItOutTogether.org. Brought to you by the Ad Council and Pivotal. A-Cast powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show we recommend. Do you like being educated on things to entertain but don't matter?

1:07Well, then you need to be listening to the podcast with Nox and Jamie. Every Wednesday, we put together an episode dedicated to delightful idiocy to give your brain a break from all the serious and important stuff. Whether we're deep diving a classic movie, dissecting the true meanings behind the newest slang, or dunking on our own listeners for their bad takes or cringy stories. We always approach our topics with humor and just a little bit of side eye. And we end every episode with recommendations on all the best new movies, books, TV shows, or music. To find out more, just search up the podcast with Nox and Jamie wherever you listen to podcasts and prepare to make Wednesday your new favorite day of the week.

1:40Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com. let's do it alright should we do another episode of this podcast yeah come on let's let's do another one here we go Joe and James Joe and James Joe and James Joe and James Joe and James Joe and James Facts Up something that we need to remember yeah obviously we don't hear it when we make when we record these things we're coming off the back of that song that intro yeah That's that theme song that we've got. In my head, we're coming off the back of the Newsnight music or something. Yeah. But I know that that's not what it sounds like.

2:24I'd like it to be the Crystal Mays song. Yeah. Do-do-do-do-do. Do-do-do-do-do. Do-do-do-do-do-do. Do-do-do-do. What a show that was, by the way. Fucking brilliant. Unbelievable. They tried to bring it back, didn't they? It was old Merchant. Don't want to keep talking about Merchant on this podcast. It's all right. But they got Stephen Merchant to host a special, like a sort of charity special version of the Crystal Maze. Yeah, yeah. It should have... Did he wear a bald cap? Did he wear a bald wig? I suppose I have to say. Is there such a thing as a bald wig?

3:00So they were trying to simultaneously bring back the Crystal Maze and launch, for the first time, the bald wig. Yeah. They were like, this is the time to do... kill two birds at one stone um they did yeah see the thing is right I'm a big crystal maze fan and I don't and I don't know much about it yeah there's something going wrong do you remember during the first series of the in between us where you lived across the road from Richard yeah and we um you and Simon Bird yeah would come in and tell us that you'd seen him yeah yeah I know it was kind of weird we used to sort of watch him we'd be like he's going up the stairs now it'll come back into vision now.

3:39Now he's on the first floor. To be fair, it was just off the back of like Garth Marenghi and Man to Man with Dean Lerner and stuff like that. And we were obsessed with that. We were so obsessed with Garth Marenghi especially. I should probably intro this actually. We've started. No, we're right. We've gone barebacked into this. Never apologise. Welcome to Joe and James Fact Up. Each week we'll be bringing one another a fact that we deem interesting and of course our policy is that the more interesting it is, the more true it must be. That's the only rule. We will unpack it, debate it, and then probably, if you're listening to this show for the first time, start talking about anything else.

4:23We'll also dig into the weird things that you'd like to think are true, but you can't be bothered to do the research yourself, so we'll decide whether it's true or not without any... Again, we can't be bothered to do the research either. Well, no, I think we made it clear. We'll have a good think. We'll have a good think about it. We're calling that fact check. And that's as much as you can ask from anyone in this world of ours. Your best. That's all you can do. We're fucking busy. You can only do your best. We're trying our fucking best. Absolutely. If you want to send in your facts for us to officially decide whether they're true or not.

4:57Once and for all. You can email us. Our email address is hello at joeandjamespod.com. You can WhatsApp us on 07822 034 330. And also Instagram, TikTok, our handle is at JoeAndJamesPod. And you can also watch our full episodes on YouTube. All you've got to do is search for JoeAndJamesFactUp. And if you didn't understand anything I said just then, all that information will be in the podcast description. Yeah. Now, Joe, let's get fucked up.

5:34Joe, how are you, mate? Are you good? Yeah, I'm good, thanks. Have you had a good week? Yeah, I've had a good week. Since the last episode that we recorded. Yes. Yeah, I've... Yeah, oh, what a week. So much has changed, hasn't it? So much, and yeah, so much has stayed the same. I've been working with a friend of ours, actually. Oh, yeah. Spenny. Spencer Millman. Spencer Millman, producer of... The Second Inbetweeners film. The Second Inbetweeners film. yeah yeah producer of the in between us pilot yeah joe just topped and tailed it didn't he did why did he do that well i was speaking to him about it actually during the week because he did he did um he did produce the pilot of the in between us yeah and i was in that pilot yes you were i was the only one of our boys that was in it and you were playing neil i was playing neil in the pilot yeah weird and um did you hope to play the other characters at some point i i was at one point i thought i was gonna play them all yeah i was just like i'll fucking do it yeah they were I'll do like an Eddie Murphy thing.

6:35Yeah. Yeah. I'll just do that. But I... You could play like Will's mum as well. Absolutely. Why not? Yeah, of course. I did... Who else does it? Sandler. He does a bit of that, doesn't he? Where he plays more than one character in a film. Yes. What's that thing where he plays like a man and a woman or something? It doesn't matter. I can tell by your face that we're not going to... That you don't know what I'm talking about. Well, instantly. No, was it? My eyes just went completely. Yeah.

7:09But I've been working with Spencer Millen. I've also been working with Anthony, Tony. Anthony Wilcox. Wilcox. That's his surname, isn't it? Anthony Cox. Anthony Wilcox. Is it Wilcox? Coxie. Old Coxie. Old Big Cox. Well, the big dangling cock. Big veiny Cox. Yeah. Yeah. No, I've been working with him. I play football with him you play football with him he's the goalkeeper on our team he told me a little thing about you Joe oh yeah go on he gave me a little story about you yeah go on and I was going he's mental he's fucking insane I need to have a word with Joe right I need to talk to him right so apparently you're on the same team as him right yeah I am yeah and there's another team that's a bit of a rival with you guys you know what I'm talking about yeah I do I don't know what this I know what this story is yeah is it okay to talk about this yeah you can talk about it yeah because it is insane it is quite funny yeah right so Joe plays football for a team what is it a five side team yeah and you guys have got like a rival team or something you play each other a couple of times a year yeah and usually what happens because you're a big shot you're a big time star you're off the in between usually what happens after the game is people will ask if they can have a picture with you and you're always I'm always obliged you're always more than happy to do that one guy asked for a picture with you had a picture with you and then just started getting chatting to you yeah And then he said, we should go for a drink sometime.

8:36Yeah. And you said yes. Yeah. Right? Yeah. So then a little bit later, so you exchanged phone numbers then? Is that what happened? Yeah, we did exchange phone numbers then. Yeah. So then a little bit later, he said to you, I'm going for a drink tonight. Do you want to meet me at this pub? We'll have a couple of pints. It'll be a good laugh. Yeah. And you were like, yep, sure. I'll be there. Yeah. And you turned up to the pub. Yeah. And he was there with a date. Yeah, this is true, yeah. And basically, what I've pieced together is that some bloke who you've just met, a fan, some fan that you've just met, you've gone, let's go for a pint together.

9:17And he's arranged a date and tried to impress this girl by saying, I know Joe Thomas from The Inbetweeners. In fact, I can get him to turn up tonight if you like. And she's gone, go on then. And you've turned up on a date. to try, because this bloke's trying to impress a girl, right? It is true. Is that what happened? It is true. Hang on. Yeah. It gets worse though, doesn't it? Yeah, it does get worse, yeah. Right? So after that situation, you go, if I was you, Joe, you go, maybe I shouldn't just give my number out to fans of the Inbetweeners, right? Yeah. And God bless them. We love them, don't we?

9:50We can't. Yeah. Anyone that loves the Inbetweeners. And I talk to people off the street. Very much at all. I spend a lot of time talking to people about the Inbetweeners, having pictures with people. Every day of my life. I've got no problem. They're brilliant. I don't, I probably am not. And I don't think they'd expect this from me. No, they wouldn't. No. I'm not going to meet up for a pint with you. Right? No. And also not, well, I suppose it's not even just meeting up for a pint. It was a fact that to some extent I was the third wheel. Absolutely. Yeah. You turned up, you turned up on this guy's date.

10:23Yeah. But it's to make him look good, right? It's to impress a girl. I didn't realise this. Yeah. So you learn a lesson there, didn't you? You can do it. You can do, can't you? You can do. You can even learn a lesson. Yeah. Or you can do the exact same thing a couple of weeks later. Yeah. Yeah, I know. And also... Stop turning up to this bloke's dates. I know. And also, it was always a different girl. I know. So it was different. Yeah. He was putting it about, trying to impress all these girls, saying, I know Simon from the in-betweeners. in fact I'll get him to turn up to this date and he's gone he's done it once before I wonder if I'll get him to do it again and you fucking did I know it took several do you still talk to this guy no no that's the right answer don't say no as if that's a bad thing no that's the right answer it was quite you're going to defend this guy now I'm not going to defend him I just, I think it was just about that.

11:27You've got Stockholm Syndrome sometimes. I do, I did think it's, these are funny evenings because like we. Were you doing it for the crack? No, no, I mean they've, to some extent peculiar evenings because we would all like have drinks together. But then I would just go home and then sometimes they would go to like the theatre or something or they'd go on to do something else. so it was like i was the first bit but then he was like it was almost like he was i'll book something else as well so it's like it won't it won't it won't just be joe i'll have a backup right of course so you're there early in the evening yeah to get to get the to get the date all nice and impressed yeah and then he goes thanks for that joe i'll see you later we're off to the theatre now.

12:20I think the most embarrassing thing is that it did take, like, a number of occasions for me to really realise what was going on. And... See, this is why I worry about you, Joe. Yeah. Because you are... You're a people pleaser. I am a people pleaser. You don't like upsetting people. No, I don't. Someone says to you, oh, I really love the Inbetweeners. You're so good in that show. Would you like to go for a pint sometime? Sometime. You go, yes, here's my number. You've got to stop doing that. Right? Just for security as well. Like, I don't want to... Yeah, yeah. Just as your mate, right, stop giving your number out.

13:01Don't get me wrong. I'm sure he was a nice guy. He was a nice guy. But he's taken advantage of you there. He's taken advantage of your good nature. He probably was a little bit, yeah. All right. A little bit. But I suppose, like, it was... I mean, I... Go on. In a way, you're like... You know, I'm slightly flattered that I was considered, like, part of the entertainment. And then the theatre, so it was like Joe and a show. Joe and a show. So that's just a classic. Do you reckon he's on Tinder? Do you reckon he's on Tinder going... I think it... Fancy Joe and a show tonight, babe. is it is it like um yeah yeah it's netflix yeah isn't it yeah yeah joe and a show yeah um yeah no this this actually um this is true and and um yeah it just i i'm off i wasn't it took me a long time genuinely to clock on to the other element of the evening i tell you something about you joe and i love you and you're one of my favorite people in the world you're very very intelligent you're an intelligent guy well you not got sunshine street smarts i think that's true you're not got those at all whatsoever no i don't know no and then you end up in those situations next time can you just talk to me first yeah yeah just go oh some fan of the in between i've just played football against him he wants to go for a pint should i do it or not And I go, do you know what, mate?

14:35Leave it. Yeah. Yeah. What happened when you turned up? Like, do you literally give yourself a pint and sit down with the two of them? Yeah, it was me and this dad, basically. Yeah. Well, dates, weren't there? Dates. Yeah, it was... Because you had a different girl, like, a couple of weeks after it happened the first time. Yeah. I can't believe you went back. Yeah. Yeah. I know. What did you say to Hannah? Oh. I've got to go. I'm off out tonight. Hannah was, I mean, Hannah would have been like, she's a lot more sensible than me. She would have been like, probably what would have happened is that I just wouldn't have mentioned to begin with.

15:18Sure. Like, so it would have taken maybe a couple of times and then Hannah would have said, what actually happens on this evening? And I would have said, well, it's just your normal evening, you know, me, him and the woman. And then she would have been like, sorry. Yeah. What was it you mean? and I said well no he just always brings it on yeah but your whole thing your whole thing is well I said yes now I know I'm really bad I've heard so many times where you've said that yeah I know where I've gone to you don't why are you doing that don't do that and you go well I told him I would I know well so you can't sometimes in life it seems as though you're a man of your word you've got to respect that I'm like George Washington you are cannot tell a lie

16:05The more you listen to your kids, the closer you'll be. So we asked kids, what do you want your parents to hear? I feel sometimes that I'm not listened to. I would just want you to listen to me more often and evaluate situations with me and lead me towards success. Listening is a form of love. Find resources to help you support your kids and their emotional well-being at SoundItOutTogether.org. That's SoundItOutTogether.org. Brought to you by the Ad Council and Pivotal.

16:39Joe and James, Joe and James, Joe and James, Joe and James, fight off! Joe. Hello. It's time to do a little fact. Yes, let's do it. Sexy little fact. I'm going to go first this week. Yeah. I've actually got it written down on my phone. Okay. because last week we were body shamed yes um we were cruelly body shamed at work yeah uh which i am which has cut me deep by a colleague we won't say who it is which is still on which is it's still ongoing absolutely yeah there's a tribune um it did it did cut me deep but luckily enough not deep enough um because apparently i'm so fat yeah yeah yeah oh you know it was to be it was we were calling ourselves fat weren't we we were calling ourselves so we thought we would uh do some facts about fat yeah yes that's what we're gonna do and i'm gonna go first okay let's do it um so joe yeah how's anyone yeah i mean you're very well proportioned.

17:45You're very handsome. Thanks very much. You are fucking, you were the Paul McCartney of the in-betweeners. Yeah. That's fair to say. All the girls fancied you. But have you ever been called fat head? No. No. You'd consider that a derogatory term, right? You'd be like, oh, fat head. You've got a fat head, right? Yeah. If anyone does call you fat head... Oh, I can turn around and say... Oh, well, excuse me, sir. Thank you for that. Yes. Thanks for that. Yeah. Because the human brain is about 60 % fat. Fuck off! So if you are a fathead, it just means you've got more brain, baby. Oh, shit. Shit the bed.

18:31I wish I knew that when I was in primary school. Oh, my God. Well. It's comebacks like that that would have got me so popular. Fucking hell. I'd have had... Oh, God. The birds I would have got at primary school if I had a comeback like that. Yeah. You're basically calling me clever. Exactly. Oh, the joke's on you. Yeah. That's always a good comeback, isn't it? It is, yeah. Well, actually, I think you'll find. Yes. The joke's on you. Everyone's laughing at me. Everyone's laughing at me. But they should actually be laughing at you. Yeah, but... Because you've called me fathead. But did you know that the brain is actually 60 % fat, which means that I've got a bigger brain than you?

19:04Exactly. So actually, the joke's on you. So the joke's on you. No one's actually laughing at you, but history will record... Yeah, skinny head. I'm going to call you skinny head from now on. Yeah, yeah. When the history of today is written, we will know. And then I'd have to get a little fire extinguisher out there. Yeah. To put that burn out. Yeah. Yeah. Well, exactly. Yeah. Exactly. But yeah, what do you think about that then, Joe? I think that's very interesting. And I'm going to actually, so my, one of my brothers is literally a neuroscientist. And he told me about how you kind, it's not really, just reminds me, reminds me of the same thing.

19:43One of your brothers is a neuroscientist. What's the other one doing? How many brothers have you got? Three? One's a primary school teacher. One's a primary school teacher. And one works in like the third century, works in a charity, that sort of area. All doing really great work. I know what you're going to say. All contributing to society in incredible, amazing ways. Yeah, I know. And then me, literally trying to spread misinformation. Yeah. Like, I mean, I'm literally the, I'm the problem. You know, almost if you said, like, what's the problem right now? You'd say, bad information online. Yeah.

20:20Hello. Especially the primary, like, so the primary school isn't, like, he's quite high up in the primary school as well, is he not? He's, you know what, he's not the head teacher, but he's very well thought of. And in primary schools, there's always a shortage of male primary school teachers, because men consider it a feminine profession for some reason. Sure. And actually, it's a terrible irony, because one thing that young boys really, really need and are crying out for is good male role models. Absolutely, yeah. I think there's some bad ones knocking about that have managed to fill that vacuum.

20:49Well, exactly. If you don't give them good ones, they're going to find other ones and they will not be good. But I feel like we're dangerously close to having a serious conversation. We are, we are. That's not why we're here. If you want us to have a serious conversation, you need to pay us. I do know for a fact that primary school kids are exposed to the in-betweeners. I think if I was a primary school kid, I think I'd seek that sort of thing. Probably behind my parents' back and stuff. So isn't your brother a bit like, mate, thanks. Thanks for that. I mean, I guess so, yeah. He hasn't, I don't...

21:27Do they know you're his brother? Or is that something he's decided to keep secret? it because obviously he needs respect as well doesn't he like yeah i i am i i don't know i probably i doubt he talks about it very much yeah um but um yeah i am yeah i don't know i don't know but um but anyway no he's um that's what he doesn't think he's very good at it and and um it's uh to be fair if you wanted some if you wanted some cred yeah what you could do one day is you could like rent like a Mustang or something for the day. Oh, okay. And wear like a sort of college letterman jacket. Like what the quarterback is.

22:09Yeah, yeah. Have some shades on. Yeah, that's right. And just like be leaning up against the car with one foot on the car, smoking a cigarette and just be like, hey, I'm picking you up today. Yeah, yeah. And they'll be like, whoa, he knows Simon from the in-between. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Don't worry, kids. I'm just here to pick up your teacher. Yeah. We're just going to hit a few bars. Whoa. Yeah. Whoa. Can we sit in the car? You're so cool, Mr. Thomas. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. I think I'd like to do that. I wonder what his reaction would be. You fuck off. Do you think I'd look good in that sort of garb?

22:55Do you think I'd look all right, wouldn't I? Oh, you'd pull it off. I think I'd be okay. Yeah. I would say just like toss an American football. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wouldn't throw it. No, no. I think it might all fall apart then. Just be, yeah. Just sort of like, just do this. Just go, hey kid, go long. Yeah. Only kidding. Yeah, that's it. Yeah, that's really good. Just do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, very cool. Yeah. Very, very cool. Keep it very cool. Yeah. And flick him a quarter. Yeah, there you go. Bites of soda. Yeah, just say, hey, kid, keep being a legend, yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, thank you.

23:32And I drive off. And then I drive off. Then you drive off. And they're like, legitimately, who was that? Who was that guy? Yeah. Who was that guy? No, but that is a thing these days. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll tell you something, Joe. It's called aura farming. My two boys. I've got two boys. One is 14. Right. Sounds insane. and they're like because they were like he's nearly ready to be in the in-betweeners I mean he's yeah that's weird isn't it yeah it is a bit weird yeah it's weird but they're they've genuinely said to me a couple of times like you're quite cool dad like some of the stuff that you do that's good like your aura your aura farming right oh right so like if they've got mates around and stuff like that I'd be like hey kids dominoes oh and they were like whoa oh okay fuck oh that's good no they don't say fuck but do you know what I mean yeah I'll be like hey you want to play on the PlayStation VR headset whoa that's good that's really good you know it's good it's good for children to have other children from their dad's school yeah it's called it's called aura farming aura farming yeah okay well I tell you I tell you a genuine time I'm not running a farm at the moment it's just a sort of overgrown area.

24:52Tell you a genuine time where I did Samora farming. Yeah. We were in Australia. Oh yeah. We were promoting the film. Yes. So we'd shot it. Yeah. Then we went, sorry. Just burping. Then we went back about six months later. Even all farmers have to burp. Even, sometimes you lose a bit of borer. You've got to burp. It's fine. Sometimes you do lose Samora points. That's why you have farming insurance. In case you Well, yeah. I burped during today's harvest. It used to be that you used to get a load of aura from the EU, but now we don't get that. I know. Exactly. I know. Oh, what about the regulation, though?

25:28I will give you it. There was a lot of aura red tape, sure. No, there was a lot of aura red tape. I know, exactly. Yeah. We were in Australia. And you were like, oh, God, I couldn't honestly, hand on heart, tell my children to go into aura farming. I'd say, get out. Get out. Christmas Day, you're aura farming. Yeah. It doesn't take a day off. It's not what they say. It's not what they say. It's not the archers, believe you me. Yeah. But we were in Australia. Yeah. And like, I've been meaning to talk to you about this, by the way. Yeah. Yeah. That, we went on a PR campaign in Australia to sell the second in between films to Australia.

26:02It's funny being on a PR campaign, isn't it? One, it is always funny being on a PR campaign. It's always bizarre. And you end up in these really weird situations. I'm getting people to like you. Yeah. And you're like, what's for? The Australian one. The Australian one was fucking odd. Loads of fun. Don't get me wrong. I enjoyed every minute of it. Yeah. But every time I think about it, I was like, what? So in Australia, like, again, I don't want to keep going on about farming, but farming festivals, conventions are like huge, absolutely agricultural sort of fairs. And so if you're trying to, even if you're like Tom Cruise or something, and you're trying to sell a film in Australia, you've got to be a guest at one of these fairs, because that's where everyone's going to be.

26:50That's where all the media is going to be. Yes, all the news and everything. We ended up shearing sheep. We were shearing sheep. We were in a sheep shearing competition. The four of us. There's a picture of us somewhere. I think if you Google it, and we might have to put that up, because I think people are going to think, what the fuck are you talking about right now, Buckley? Of us in dungarees stood around a sheep being sheared or something. No, I remember that. Shearing a sheep is... I'm surprised. You just found it. Oh, man. We sheared some sheep. But. That's a serious aura farm. Sometimes aura farming is just farming.

27:27Right. Get this right. So back to aura farming. We were walking through this fair. Yeah. And there's all the fairground rides also going on. All those classic fairground rides. Yeah. And this Aussie guy. Yeah. Was like, whoa, whoa. It's fucking Jay from the in-betweeners. Come and have a go. Come and have a go. Come and have a go. And we were being ushered. Yeah. So this was all in one move. and Ian Morris was right behind me. He was like, please, please have a go. You don't have to pay. And his game was a load of balloons on the wall and you had a dart. And if you hit a balloon, you got a prize.

28:02And as I'm walking, all in one move, he's put this dart in my hand. I've just lobbed it and it sort of arced over. I hit three balloons and it landed in the wall. And he went, do you want a prize? I went, come on, mate, got to go. And Ian Morris was behind me going, He's just fucking walking off. He's just walking away. And if I, if the only thing that could have made that cooler is if, is if I'd have just had some shades, I could have just brought down and gone, sorry, mate, gotta go. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that was, that was a moment in my life. That is. And also he didn't, so he doesn't know anything.

28:40He's not seen any of my life before then. He's not seen any of my life behind. Yeah. After that situation. Yeah. He just thinks I'm a fucking legend. And he went, what about the prize? And he went, give it to the local children's hospital. Yeah. Yeah. Keep it, babe. Yeah. Yeah. You need it more than I do. What are we talking about? I was saying, you know, my brother told me that the brain can't respire anaerobically. That's what he told me. Thank you, Joe. So basically, the thing about it being 60 % fat, it's almost like you need, this isn't scientifically verified. Well, it might be. It might be.

29:10No, no. If we both agree, yeah. If we both go that sense. So it's almost like the fat thing makes me think it's this hungry organ almost. So my brother said, you'll never burn fat by thinking because the brain just needs actual proper food. You know when you get into the fat burning part of exercise, when you've run out of glucose or whatever. So that's when your body is like, we don't want to, but we're going to have to burn some of the fat. if the brain runs out of glucose, say, it won't start doing that. It can't do it. It just needs food. It needs feeding. But this is my point. So I think, I kind of think that, if people don't mean you, our job is to think.

29:55All right? Sure. It's the thing. Our job is not, this isn't our job. Our bodies are, you know, whatever. It's the brain. The brain's the most important thing. It's the brain. The brain is you. So like, if I'm trying to like work and I'm like, well, I'll do a better job if I have some more sugar. Like I should have, it's not my job. to not be fat. It just literally isn't. But it feels like, I'd say 70 % of people I meet are like primarily interested in their body rather than their mind. No, I think, I would say 70%. We're all guilty of it. Yeah. We're all guilty of it. And then you end up, I was talking to Claire, I was going, do you reckon I could get a nose job?

30:34My nose is really big and broken and can I just get a nose job? She said, if you do that, I'll leave you. which actually made me feel good. Oh, that's really nice. Yeah. He said, if you change your nose, I'll leave you. If you change anything about your face, I'll leave you. I was like, oh, thanks, mate. That's what I needed right now. It's nice, that. Didn't get any aura points with that conversation. No. I wasn't farming aura then. Yeah. Hey, Joe. Yeah. We need to do, and we need to do this. This is our job. Yeah. Because we are the fact boys. Yeah. We need to. We're the fat heads. We are the fact heads.

31:08we need to do some fact checking right now. Okay, let's do it. So it's time for fact check. This is where you, the listener slash viewer, will send in something that feels like a fact that you'd like us to confirm as true or false. Yep, yep. The criteria being whether we think it sounds true. Yeah. That's it, isn't it? Yeah. So we'll be reading a fact that you've sent us or a question that you'd like us to get to the bottom of. and then we're going to have a good little think during the break and we'll come back and let you know how it feels to us. Yeah, yeah. That was feeling. Joe, I think you've got today's fact.

31:46Is that right? I've got the fact here. Okay, so this week's fact check comes from Paul. He said, hi, J &J. Love that. Don't mind that at all. Don't mind that at all. Let's get that to catch on. Yeah, J &J. That is a brand, isn't it? J &J. It looks good as well. It's like a sort of outlet mall. That looks mint, mate. What's his fact, Joe? I can't remember exactly where I heard this. I swear it came from Attenborough. Casual. But I heard that dolphins are the only other animal that have sex with pleasure. Do you think that's true? Oh, I've heard the same thing. Let's have a little think about it and we'll be back after the break.

32:26Lovely.

32:33The more you listen to your kids, the closer you'll be. So we asked kids, what do you want your parents to hear? I feel sometimes that I'm not listened to. I would just want you to listen to me more often and evaluate situations with me and lead me towards success. Listening is a form of love. Find resources to help you support your kids and their emotional well-being at SoundItOutTogether.org. That's SoundItOutTogether.org. Brought to you by the Ad Council and Pivotal.

33:10There's my favourite Australian news report of, I think it was in the 80s or the early 90s, that bloke getting arrested. I haven't seen it. What are the charges? for having a meal, a succulent Chinese meal. I see you know your judo well. This is democracy manifest. Have you not seen that? I don't think so. Right? I'm going to show you something now, Joe. Yeah, show it to me. I'm going to show you something now. Yeah. I love that. Yeah. And particularly me and my sister-in-law. Right. Love that guy so much. Yeah. I think he was a bit of a ne 'er-do-well, to be honest. I think he was a bit of a dodgy character.

33:48Yes, sure. But that clip is legendary. Right. And she's a, my sister-in-law is a tattoo artist. My wife's sister is a tattoo artist. So without telling Claire, I went off and got a tattoo. And I suppose it's a little homage to this thing that me and my sister-in-law love so much. Oh, it's so funny. Claire is furious. But I have got on my arm a little Chinese takeaway box and it says succulent. Oh, that's so good. i've got that i've got that tattooed on my body what are the charges having a meal a succulent chinese meal and i just love it i just thought that's something that me and my sister-in-law find so funny and it will also be something that really annoys claire i just love it but we need to stop thinking about australia for a second yeah um because we do need to get back to yes Was it Paul?

34:40Paul has said he thinks he's heard. Yes. And he swears it came from Attenborough. He swears it came from Attenborough. So that's fact. Okay. If you swear you heard Attenborough. But also, yeah, the dolphins are the only other animal. Right. I feel like I've heard the other animals also do it. Yeah, that's the only. I do think the dolphins do have sex for pleasure. but I do think there are other animals that also do. So I don't think it's a fact that dolphins, apart from human beings, are the only animals that have sex for pleasure. Yeah. But I do think it's a fact that dolphins do do that. In fact, I've heard, I think this was from Attenborough, that some dolphins have sexually assaulted people, like on the beach and stuff like that.

35:30Oh, right. Bloody hell. Right. Like I've heard stories that dolphins have got a little stiffy and stuff. like oh right yeah yeah yeah oh well and i think that was attenborough that told me that actually yeah yeah it sounds like i was i was i was having a succulent chinese meal yeah yeah yeah and um and yeah and he went oh buckley do you know have you heard this he was just having a fag as well yeah no buckley have you heard this right he put his pint down he put his pint down and he went buckley um you know dolphins right yeah i know some birds right she was out in the sea yeah Fucking Dolphin tried it on with her, didn't she?

36:03Yeah, yeah. Half-kir-n-l. We've got to get him out. We've got to get him out. That's what he said. And then he just walked off. Yeah, word for word. Yeah, no, I mean, you know, he'll deny it till the cows come home. But he said it. Don't say it then, Asenborough. If you're going to deny it now. I'm going to do a fact up. Hang on, what are we saying there? Well, I'm going to do a fact up first. All right. And I think this is fine. that is half true because I do I have heard and Attenborough said it you know that dolphins do have sex for pleasure yeah however I do think there are like bonobos I feel like I've heard that yeah I think that other animals do I think there's like some insects yeah that just like to sort of have it off without the sort of they just enjoy it yeah that might not be true That might not be true, that one.

37:00But I do think... What insects do we think would do that? It's in the name. Cockroach. Cockroach. Absolutely, yeah.

37:13Cockroaches. Cockroaches, yeah. How do you feel about that, Joe? Half true. Half fact. Half fact is great. Yeah? It just shows that we're pretty precise in what we do. Can you imagine, though? Can you imagine being on a beach and some horny dolphin pinning you down, big smile on their face? It'd be fucking terrifying. Right, so we're saying half true. Half fact. We think cockroaches might do it as well. We're not sure. But, you know, what if they're not? I'll ask Attenborough about that. I'm seeing him tonight. We'll ask Attenborough. We're playing darts tonight, me and Attenborough, so I'll ask him.

37:56You do the pub quiz with him, don't you? every second Wednesday. Tell you something, mate. Yeah. Fucking having him on your team. Yeah. Any sort of natural. He's really brilliant at music, isn't he? Any natural. Yeah. Pop culture. Yeah. 70s. Hits of the 70s, isn't he? Brilliant. Tell us something about Amber. Yeah. Obsessed with X Factor. Yeah. No, I know. I know. He's always like, and he's voting all the time and stuff. Yeah. I remember him telling me to vote. He did the pilot. He was on the panel. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. imagine getting Edinburgh for Britain's Got Talent or something love it I really would think it would be great imagine what he'd bring what's his criteria he would just go I don't think any of this matters yeah he would say that I like that that is what Edinburgh would say if you've got Edinburgh on X Factor he'd say why is this happening this is simply not important yeah yeah I mean you can tell though wasn't it Edinburgh that that okayed Monty Python.

39:01He did. He's just a legend, isn't he? He's done all the Attenborough programs, famously. Yeah. He has to do those. He has to do those because they named the programs first, didn't they? Yeah. And then they went looking. They were like, oh, it's sad. And it was him or Richard Attenborough. Richard Attenborough was in Jurassic Park. He was too busy with Jurassic Park. He was busy with Jurassic Park because they were like, oh, we want Richard Attenborough. Yeah. And he was like, I've got a brother. and they went oh fine

39:33JT it is time now for you to present to me your fact let me get my fact out get it out in front for the lads yeah um so we went with fat yeah this is about fat my fat my fact good you love words yeah is that it's about the world's most expensive bar of soap. You know, soap's made up of fat. Animal fats. Unless you're vegan. You can get vegan ones, I'm sure. Well, a human being is, of course, an animal. Absolutely. And so my fact... Sometimes the dirtiest animals. Filthy. Because they can be filthy. Yeah. They're a disgrace. They are. I've seen some videos. They behave like animals. They do. So we'll treat them like animals.

40:31What? Go on, here's with your fat fact. Okay. The world's most expensive bar of soap was made from body fat removed from the then Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.

40:45Was he the one that had all the facelifts and stuff? Is he dead now? I don't know. I think he's dead. Is Berlusconi dead? but he had like he was proper like towards the end well if he's still alive yeah but he was he was prime minister wasn't he president present I'll tell you he died two years ago two years ago yeah he was yeah he was the prime minister yeah but he was he was the prime minister at the time that they that they did this soap thing and this is actually from the Guinness book of records yeah I don't know when doesn't matter it says doesn't matter It's on display in a gallery in Basel, Switzerland, but can be purchased for£10 ,000.

41:28I don't know if he would have gone for a bit more, especially since he's died. Yeah, yeah. Because you're not getting any more. The artist who has called his creation Manipulit, clean hands, pronunciation is probably wrong, claims to have received the fat from an unnamed employee at a plastic surgery clinic in the Basel, Switzerland. So I was going to say, I bet he's had like lipo or something. Yeah, so it sounds like Berlusconi didn't want this to happen. It was against his will that they made soap out of his... Maybe. ...sucked out fat. Well, it seems as though if it was from an unnamed... But maybe that's...

42:04He probably did have a name. Everyone does. Everyone does. And that is a fact. Good point, in a way. Joe! Yeah? I don't know about you, mate, but I am all fact out. I'm fact out. What have we learned today, Joe? What have we learned? we learned that Bellasconi there's a bar of soap made up so it's still a bellasconi your brain is 60 % fat that's fat imagine the soap made out of that dolphins are just little deviants they are and also I was thinking that actually um dolphins is a good thing because I've I like the word pod and obviously it's a pod of dolphins they do travel in a pod so I know it's Joe and James pod so we're in a little pod together we're in a pod together and we have sets of pleasure as well don't we so actually it's we do it's quite it's um it all fits together actually and it's fit together very early.

42:47Sometimes it can be quite painful. Depends what you're getting up to. Yeah, it's, but we, you know, we... I don't want to tell you the kind of stuff that Claire makes me do.

42:58It's really sore. And Claire, you've got to stop doing it to me. It just makes me feel bad. Yeah, but you need to say the safety word, otherwise that's just part of the turn on stuff. The safety word is more. More. So she tricked her. Safety word, yeah. And we also learn that Joe, if you're a guy out there trying to impress a date, that Joe will just turn up and pretend that you're mates. Joe and a show. Joe and a show. We do hope that you've learned something or just, you know, enjoyed that, had a nice time. We'll be back next week with some more facts, chats and aura farm tacks. Yeah. No, I've read the other ones.

43:42That's the best one.

43:47And don't forget that you can get in touch with us if you'd like us to fact check something that feels true to you or any nonsense, any message you want to get to us. You can email us, hello at joandjamespod.com or you can send us a WhatsApp message on 07822034330. They can leave voice notes on that, right? They can. Come on, get your voice notes in. or you can follow us on social media at joeandjamespod and you can watch all our episodes you can watch them you don't just have to listen to them you can watch them as well just go on YouTube search for joeandjamesfactup and if you if I haven't explained that well enough which I probably haven't all the all those details will be in the description of this podcast anyway should we go Joe?

44:34yeah we better go we better go see ya we'll be back next week bye bye

44:42Jo and James, Fox Up!

45:09Support your kids and their emotional well-being at SoundItOutTogether.org. That's SoundItOutTogether.org. Brought to you by the Ad Council and Pivotal. A-Cast powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show we recommend. Do you like being educated on things they entertain but don't matter? Well, then you need to be listening to the podcast with Nox and Jamie. Every Wednesday, we put together an episode dedicated to delightful idiocy to give your brain a break from all the serious and important stuff. Whether we're deep diving a classic movie, dissecting the true meanings behind the newest slang, or dunking on our own listeners for their bad takes or cringy stories, we always approach our topics with humor and just a little bit of side eye.

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