Best of Bowlers: Akram Magic, Curtly and Courtney, Anderson Masterclass & More! | Stick to Cricket

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2:07Philip, what on earth happened there? Those New Zealand batsmen had no idea how to play you. They were shitting themselves.

2:17Specialist subject? Cricket. I'll tell you what I'm a playboy from 1989. What are you going to be knighted for? Services to mastermind. That's it. Beef. He says, right youngster, first things first, it's in my bottle. The fridge was just full of 4X. He says, that's what I'm having. So after the first hour, you had ten Gatorade mixes in one large lager shambles. Who's the best dressed?

2:47Can't you tell? As he was running past, he goes, Lost a yard in the winter, hussy-wussy. He said it to you, right? He then told Paul Pritch, who was just sat at the non-striker, and then watching, he goes, I can't kill him. I'm like, can kill you.

3:08How often did you bowl 100 mile an hour? As in, like, 100 % or did you just go, like, 70 and then suddenly something you didn't like? I was like, oh, he must be so nice. Well, actually, when it came to Norton's first, you know, I used to bowl off from a 30-yard circle. But I quickly realised, for five months of cricket every day, you can't do that, you'll be dead. So cut my run down a bit and I felt comfortable. And I was still bowling, very effective, so I never changed. So they won't be seeing test match cricket. Was it because of that? Because of Norton's. And, um, no, I couldn't go flat out every day.

3:43That would have been crazy. But did you save it for people or not? Yeah, he had a special. Yeah, it's a crazy one. He had a little bit. He had a little bit. Who was top of that list? Oh. There was no one special. It depends on who ticked me off for the day. So Ricky Williams from Gloucester ticked him off one day. Came in and played. I was away and I heard Ricky came in and played the pull shot and went and tap. He was bowling military medium and then the next thing, glossed them all out in a few of us times. And they never... When I came out, they said, Ricky, we've got to drop Ricky, because if we're playing against Northampton, Ambrose is going to be looking for him and we're going to suffer.

4:21So we didn't play Ricky again. I remember playing against you at Cheltenham. Yeah. And Richie was my driver. Yeah. So Richie, he was up against you and... Cheltenham. Damn. You and Richie, what a contest that was. We lasted two days. We lasted two days at Cheltenham, but now for the Cheltenham festival, nothing's changed. Thursday, Friday. All our spectators turned up for Saturday, we finished on Friday. Cheltenham was my good hunting ground. He destroyed Northlands at Cheltenham. We went to Cheltenham. Great place. And Lammy was on test duty, so the boy had taught three guys from the second eleven.

5:02So I said to myself, OK, I get a promotion, batting number seven or so. I was at the number nine. I was like, what the hell is going on? Anyway, Courtney and Big Sid Lovett. Big Sid. Listen, from real pace, they blows away the first innings, and all of a sudden, second time around, they're asking me, can you still call me king? He's the king, you want to take a... I said, no, no, number nine is fine for me. They want me to go up in the order. I said, no, no, he's your mate. I said, mate? You don't know him, you know? So I still had nine. He got blown away in two days as well. Him and Big Sid, man.

5:33So Jack Russell must have been wicket-keeper. Yeah. Champion wicket-keeper. Boo-Boo was in. Boo-Boo was in. Yeah, Boo-Boo was in. Jack Boo-Boo was in. You had Mike Smith as well, didn't you? Mike Smith was swinging. Kevin Curran was there. Kevin Taylor Coppice is with us. Before he went to Northam. And they came to Northam after, yeah. Gloucester first, so we used to dominate the Cheltenham Festival together. Yeah. Those days he used to bat and bowl, then he said he wanted proper all-round a contract. Gloucester didn't give him, so he played as a batter. I remember playing against you at Bristol.

6:04David Byers was the captain of New Yorkshire and he came and he gave this speech and said, I'm going to bat, it's going to be tough for the first session. We get through that and then we're going to be OK. He bowled us out by 12.42. He was right. It would be tough for the first time. He blew us away. It was a great thrill when you see a West Indies bowler against a West Indies batter. We had Colin Croft and a little bit of Michael Olding against Viv. Yeah. God, what a game that is. They ramp it up and he's loving it. Come on, man. That's when county cricket was different, man. Yeah, it's a bit about his bragging rights, you know.

6:45When you play against each other, you want to make sure that, you know, I'm on top. So when you meet up as the West Indies team now, we can say, well, you remember that little out swing? He says, he's bragging rights. Sometimes the contest goes over into the nets. If I play against Desmond for Middlesex and he gets some runs against me, when he comes in the nets I want revenge. So he goes into the net and he would love Desmond. No, serious. If you come to West in his practice, you sway the test match. Absolutely. Because it's cutthroat. Everybody just... You have to be on... So you're peppering your own?

7:19Of course. Of course. I went to Old Trafford Nets and holding Cali Turan. Helvin Cali-Turani comes into nets, he encloses nets and all that. Horrible. They absolutely bombed him. Yeah. And he's playing in about half an hour or an hour's time. I don't think we can have a better pair to ask about the new tactic of the keeper stood up, which is causing chaos. Listen, I played a game against Australia in Grenada many years ago and I won the game and somebody from Australia got 100. The pitch was so slow, it bounced this high and Jimmy Adams was the wicked keeper and Darren Lehman scored 100 and he was batting out of his crease and Jimmy Adams came up to me, you know, his Jamaican thing, big man.

8:12You know, you want me to stand up? I said, Jimmy, don't embarrass me. I said, can you imagine Darren Lehman stomp Jimmy Adams' bowl curtly? It's a pride thing. I said, no, it's OK. Letting batter off his crease is all right. You just stay back there, boss. I can't. It's a pride thing, eh? Stand up to me. It's the opposite for me, in the sense that Jack Russell stood up to me. No, not me. I'm not doing that. He came to me and he says, do you mind if I stand up? I said, it's your choice, your risk. No, Jack did it. No helmets. No helmets. I couldn't do that. He catched a few. Yeah, he catches the vehicle.

8:49And he says to me, if you're going to bowl the bouncer, try to give me a warning, which I did. What was your signal? Well, I'm not playing now, so I can give the signal. I used to just touch my toes. Like I'm stretching. In the Test match, it's just been a trend. I'm playing against him on lashings next week. Listen, speaking of lashings, right, this man, I played against him last year. I was 61 years old. The man promulged me for a few sixes. I'll give over. I said, Cookie, come on. You can't take advantage of the old man, you know? There was no respect, but you got him out. Yeah, you did, man.

9:22You got him out. After four sixes or something, damage already done. Sixes? Yeah. Sixes, not fours. Have you got the footage? I've just tried to find. I've asked this. I said to you, come on, Cookie. You can't. You got to take care of the old man. There was no respect, Sean. No respect. No respect. I know you're telling me, be playing against next week. I'm going to beam you. Two beamers. I was ahead. Yeah. Well, I just want to say I hit. Can you imagine, you know? At Trent Bridge, Joffre Archer was bowling. I looked at Jamie Smith and he got the nod. And you could see Jamie Smith went... What?

9:57He stood up. What, to Joffre? Two balls? Yeah, I reckon. Two or three balls up to the stumps, Joffre Archer. He soon went back. Yeah, there you go. No, no, I'm not going to do that. Not when I'm bowling. It's a pride thing. You know, it doesn't look good. Not for a fast bowler.

10:14Right, here we go. Kirtley or Courtney, you've got to choose. Who was the hardest trainer?

10:22Courtney. Who was the fastest? Ooh, Ambrose. Ooh. Who's the best dressed? LAUGHTER Can't you tell? I'm all dapper. I saw him last week, he was sharp last week. Yeah, yeah, I'm a soothing thing, yeah. All suited and bootied. Who was the most likely? when got out to throw their bat?

10:53Who was the best sledger? I never sledge that. None of these boys sledged. The look was enough. Who took the most important wickets for the West Indies? Worst. LAUGHTER Now, that's a part of it. This is a good one. Who dropped the most catches off each other's bowling? Off what? Off each other's bowling. I don't know if they dropped the catch off of you. LAUGHTER He thinks you did. Do you remember it? No. I don't think I'm dropping the catch off. No, I can't recall. Did you not sneak into a gully a couple of times? Have you ever filled a gully? In a slipcordon? Yeah, he snuck in there, Kelly, didn't he?

11:39Mm-hm. Yeah. This is the last one. What was the answer? Who... What was the answer? We don't actually know. About the drops, yeah. No, no, either all. I can't recall dropping anything. Who would go for the biggest fee in the IPL? GASP! I think Curti would. Kelly? Yeah. After two of us, yeah, yeah. There'd be a few quid. It was me then Titan wouldn't want to spend any money.

12:11Who are the best bats from you over Boulder? This question has been asked lots of times. Look, I played against the greats like Sir Wim and Richard. Top of the ladder for me. It's just not his batting, it's the whole package, the charisma he used to carry around him. And then, of course, I played against Alan Border, Graham Gooch. Talking about the early 90s, then you come back to the, you know, Sachin Tendulkar's, Brian Lara's. I'm missing quite a few. But I think Viv Richards kind of was the end of his career after about 87, 88, the great Viv. But what a character he was. I mean, he was everyone's hero, every cricketer's hero.

12:52Do you know Paul Pritchard? Yes. He used to open the batting with Gucci. Yeah. He tells a story, he's like saying his face was him. And was him bounce Gucci? Gucci hooked him for four and then got a single and as he was running past he goes lost a yard in the winter how he was in. He said it to you right anyway. What are you doing Gucci? He then turned to Pritch who was just sat at the non-striker and watching and goes I can't kill him but I'm going to fucking kill you. Pritch was like I haven't done anything. It's true though. I remember that yeah. So, yeah, the story. And then, of course, I never looked back.

13:34Then I joined Lancashire. Talking about the best play technique-wise. Look, in the 90s, nobody knew what reverse swing was. Apparently, it was ball tampering. And then suddenly everybody learned it became reverse swing. Thank you very much. And Martin Crowe. Yes. He's got, I remember, test series in 93. He got 200s against me and Vakar, where Vakar got 30 wickets in three games. and I got 16-2 and I got injured after the second test match and it was reversing from the ball go. Don't know why, don't ask me why, for some odd reason it was reversing. What was the key to reverse? We've got an old ball here.

14:11If you had that ball there, how would you get that ball reversing? Look, it depends on the weather, depends on the square, depends how lush the square is, how lush the outfield is. The whole team has to be involved. If it's rough side, this one, and if one guy giving one bounce throw, no, no, no. You've got to throw the ball direct to the keeper, direct to the batter. Less hands, better. That's Mushy when he joined us. He was like... Because Matt Pryor played at Sussex and Matt Pryor was... He had him and Rana. And Matt was all over us. Sometimes you could throw it on the one bounce. But if you didn't trust yourself to hit the rough side, don't you dare.

14:53And it was no hands on the ball. So actually because I didn't sweat if you want to shine make sure your rough side is there you shine like this ball If you're gonna shine like this the rough side will go soft And obviously there won't be any so just do not touch the rough side So I didn't sweat I was in charge when it was because I could almost touch a rough side not doing any damage So you don't sweat I don't really sweat so my hands always almost dry So the map prior get it throw it to me. I'll shine it. Yeah, and obviously as no one else is touching it So it gets dry and dry and he and they ret mushy reckoned I don't know you it's like two overs if someone could put their hand on there It was two over yeah two overs yeah back to the same I remember when the great Sakhlan Mushtaq what a bowler he was though as an off spinner I mean he was unbelievable one of the best I played with he won so many games for Pakistan His habit was to ball like this yeah Sakhlan so we had to tell him buddy change this habit Otherwise we might not play you yeah understand you and your player because huh?

15:47Yeah, because the rough side used to get really soft Monty's like spin in there with the rough side then spin it into his hands Yeah, so he had to do it the other way. He obviously had massive fingers Yeah, he could have to shine the rough side there not touch the rough side and then still do his habit and then switch it over To however you want to move. What about sweaty yes. Oh my god. Yeah sweaty sweaty weird sweaty. Yes, Gary Gary. Yeah, so they would always They used to from fine leg used to abuse at a fucking stop it Can somebody talk to him? How soon do you see a ball and go, yes, it's nearly ready?

16:22This one? Yeah. No, this one will never be ready. This is not a reverse swing ball as yet, because both sides exactly are the same. So how do you get that to reverse? It depends. If it's a sunny day, then you obviously throw one bounce into the rough. You get little rough on the patches, then they work on your patches. I don't know how, but you work on the patches. You know how to do it. Everybody knows what to do now. Exactly. Yeah. Who taught you that was? Where did you find that out? Oh, I think Waqar knew it before he came into Pakistan team, in a first class, but I learned while Amudhassar Nazar was the key in my career early on, what a cricketer he was mentally.

16:58I think he was the go-to guy. If Imran or Javed, me either, wanted any cricket advice on the field or off the field, Moody was the guy. And he was the one who taught me, and then Imran was the one who taught me, I remember. But that rough side, you neglect it, totally neglect it. Leave it alone. Don't touch it. Don't touch it. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. And then there comes a time, right, off we go. But you're shining the other side, aren't you? Yeah, yeah. You've got to shine properly. Shining the other side. Yeah, yeah. So there's one rough. It's almost like tape ball, isn't it? It really is.

17:29Yeah, there's one that you're working hard to get a good shine on it. Leave the other side completely. And it looks like that. Get it looking like that. It looks like a hobnob. Looking like a hobnob. That's what... That tastes like a juke, that. LAUGHTER I have a picture of a cricket ball where I got 11 wickets, I think, five and six in West Indies. I took a picture the other day. I'll just show you. Look at this. You have close-up. Look at the rough side. It's a kookaburra. Wow, yeah. It's like that biscuit you're right. It is. Have a look. That's exactly the same. Zach and Simon. Looks like the old Rottweilers had it.

18:10It was Antigua, so the wicket was dry.

18:16It's like a Viennese world. Exactly the same.

18:26Hey, what about facing him? Oh, Jesus Christ. What about him? One of the worst. One of the worst to face for a number 11. Bonafide number 11. Wazim Akram. Horrific. What were your game plan? Actually, show us his action. Come on. I'll tell you what, at the Oval, played against the Oval. You be the umpire. Get the stumps forward a bit. There you go. You be the umpire. Bring them forward. So I've staggered out. I've staggered out slightly nervous. Slightly nervous. I've had Wazim Akram or Wackar Eunice. So I've staggered down the stairs. There you go. He's the umpire. He's the umpire. He's the umpire.

19:15So I'd be down the other end like that. Over or around? Left arm round. Left arm round. That's when he's left arm round five to come. Yeah, so I'm sitting there, so my ears are pricked up. Left arm round, left arm round. What's going on there? Well, I'm sitting there, yeah, five balls to come, and then I didn't see anything for about, I don't know, 30 seconds, because Waz used to sort of sneak up behind the umpire. Just like that. And the only thing I saw was sort of like, What?

19:48And I went to the other. I just went, Jesus Christ! And this thing came bloody snaking down stumps all over the place. You used to sort of skip behind them, didn't you? Yeah. Yeah, just sort of like that. And then just went, whoo! That's what I learned myself. Why to try something different. Go around the weekend as a left-hander. and why come just behind the umpire? That batsman can see you at the last second. So nobody taught me that. You learn as a bowler to do different things. And me and Wakaar used to have a fight and arguments when you and Devin Malcolm were walking in a bowl. I need a ball.

20:29I need a ball. I need a ball. I need a ball. We've got a walking wicket coming in right away. Jesus Christ. Well, you must have looked at it. So there's Angus Fraser, Alan Mulally. Well, there was a few walking wickets. Devon, Tophers. Tophers, yeah. I think he knocked all three stumps out of the ground. As I went, oh, my God, like that, and it just went, like that death rattle. I knew you will walk towards the leg umpire. Of course. Outswinger from there, from middle leg, and obviously he went like this, and his middle stump went away. I think it knocked them all out. I think it knocked them all out.

21:01There was nothing left as I looked round. They were all on the floor. Brilliant stuff. Good old days. Absolutely. But what an arm.

21:18Therapy's biggest impact doesn't show up in some dramatic breakthrough. It shows up in the smallest moments. You bite your tongue instead of escalating. You put your phone down instead of firing off that text. You say what you actually mean instead of what would hurt someone else the most. Nobody applauds those moments, but they quietly change your life. That's what growing feels like. And that's exactly what Grow Therapy is here for. Grow is therapy that works, covered by insurance. Sessions average$21 with insurance and some pay as little as$0 depending on their plan. There are no subscriptions, no long-term commitments.

21:55You just pay per session. Grow connects you with thousands of high-quality licensed therapists across the U.S. offering both virtual and in-person sessions nights and weekends. You can search by what matters, like insurance, specialty, identity, or availability. And you can book a therapy session in minutes and begin in as little as two days, not the national 48-day average. See if you could pay as little as$0 for therapy in seconds at growtherapy.com slash start now. That's growtherapy.com slash start now. growtherapy.com slash start now. Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plan.

23:03more while getting you everything you need it's walmart built for your business sign up for a free walmart business account today at business.walmart.com i've got to show you this clip of woody oh you're a non-drinker aren't you no but it seems like the anesthetic affects me a little bit yeah have you seen this no this is which which which was this one this would be operation about six or seven I've got nine at the minute. So I'm on your knees. So I've got... I've had four on my right knee. Yeah. I've had three on my left, so I'm four three. I'm 2-2. Oh, you're 2-2. Desmond. Desmond 2-2. What are you at?

23:45I'm at two on my knee, three on my ankle, couple on my elbow, hernia side. So I'm getting that right. I'm not going to look perfect. Have you ever had enough? I only had my appendix out. Is that it? Tonsils? No, they're still in there. But yeah, no, I don't have tonsils, man. You've got the perfect jawline, you've got everything there. Only one, so I loved it. Have you had your tonsils out there? No. Lobotomy. Metal knee. I have a metal knee. I've got a titanium knee. Right. Lobotomy. I think I'm going to need one of them. Come on, let's watch the video. I want to watch the video. Here we go. We had the...

24:21I've had elbow surgery, but my shoulder's aching. Yeah, the position you were lying in.

24:30I still go fast. I still go fast. Looking forward to your ideal comeback. Yeah, I'm so sad. Not this time? No. 2023? I like Abby Flower.

24:51Teehole. Teehole, yeah. Who won the gun? Yes. Lollipop! LAUGHTER

25:05Is that why you don't drink? I think so. The lollipop bit was because my mouth was dry, my brain was obviously... Because when you're under, you think this stuff after. You remember that? You see it and then after you think it. You remember that? No, but when he showed us it, I know why I said that, because my mouth was dry, so I was going, lollipop! That's the worst thing about it.

25:30When did you lengthen your run-up? End of 2018, just before the 2019. Michael Holden told his side. But he told me ages ago, so he'd have been in the comms box. I remember when I met my debut and stuff, because you get to that point, you don't want to change, because you're like, well, that's got me to here. But I was bang. When I look back now, I was bang average. It made me force things and rhythm and everything. And I wish I'd listened earlier. I actually pulled him aside one day. I remember I was at Game at Lord's and said, look, I hear this is what you said. And it wasn't like, you know, sometimes people get the lip on the commentators, but it wasn't at all.

26:08It was like, look, what have you seen? I respect your opinion. You're great. Like, what have you seen in me that I can get better? And he just said, look, yeah, it's your run up for me. Like, that's where everything starts. And it took me another year past that to think, right, I'm going to make the change. there was a lot of injuries a lot of sad moments I was up and down but because I'd get into that international cricket I was worried that if I changed it that I'd be out of the team and because I was in and out so much I didn't want to take the risk that I would never get back but then it got to the point where Trevor Bayliss had sort of wound me up a little bit and probably although I'm like a I would say more of a positive happy lad it like it niggled us a little bit when he said that I didn't have enough mongrel in us and that.

26:54I was sharp but I wasn't quick quick and ever since that day I was like, right I'm going to show you. I had a bit of period out of the team so we just one day filled on my run up but I stopped doing the stop start run up in training. I was just sort of like building it back and building it back so I naturally had a sort of run up and then eventually it was like, right I'm going to let a few fly and I did a game in Sri Lanka, ODI and I didn't get any wickets and I thought, oh, God, this run-up's not the one. And then the next game I did with the run-up was St Lucia. I got five wickets there. And then St Sern it was...

27:28So you was good at... Just because you didn't get any wickets first. Gonna rack it out. It's just not me. I'm never gonna make it out. But then I stuck with it and I'm glad I did. I just wish I'd done... It's easy to say now, but my career, the difference between I bowled with that run-up to this one is, like, totally different. Yeah.

27:53But Beef, I mean, listen, the best English cricketer all around that I've seen play. Total self-belief. That was what he got from Beefy. I'm going to take the wickets. I'm going to score the runs. You just come with me. We'll do it. And he drag you along. That was his strength for me, was the self-belief he had in the game. But as soon as the game was done, he was just... I mean, my job, my role on that trip was to make sure we were we were sponsored Gatorade was the in 86 was it was a drink was the sports drink sponsor but it wasn't the fancy bottles you were having there we got a big box of powder giving us mix the powder and then we got electrolytes electrolytes and sort of the powder and then we all got given a green litre and a half bottle so my job was to mark i was marking those bottles up individually and I got a tap on the shoulder, look there, beef.

28:50He says, right youngster, first things first, none of that shit in my bottle, pointing at the box of Gatorade. And then in the car he says, see the fridge over there? And there was this line that the fridge was just full of 4X. He says, that's what I'm having in my bottle. What on the pitch? Yeah. He just says, right, he just starts off, he says, he just says, right, first things first, just you know drinks first drinks break just put you know two or three cans of lager topping it with lemonade anyway so so you ran out you ran out with the the drinks after the first hour you had 10 gatorade mixes in one large log of shandy

29:28didn't you put tequila in it didn't you do tequila rocket fuel yeah i mean it was just So that was... It was in the case... That was a warm-up game. He didn't do that in the Test match. To be fair to the both. I'll go back. Were Australia doing a similar thing around that time? Was it just the norm? Well, the Aussies, obviously, Border had just taken over, Captain, there were one or two young people like Geoff Marsh and... Fat Cat, Richie. Greg Ritchie, Steve Wall was a young all-rounder coming through. Dean Jones, another young player. So they weren't obviously the powerhouse team that they become.

30:12And they themselves were under pressure from their media and their fans. They were on it. The old boys, people like Lillian Marsh and Ian Chappell, were always saying, oh, Borders is too pally with the likes of Garrow and Lamb and Botham. They were on Borders' back. Because he changed for 89 when he came over. He didn't speak to us, did he? Exactly. Because we went to Perth and Gucci said, I'm going to go see AB because he was playing for Essex at the time. And he refused to see him, he said he was too busy. Really? And that was it. Simpson had said to Borda, no socialising with the England team.

30:56It was a change. When you won, at the end of every game, at the end of every day, sorry. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Every... During the... We used to... The fielding side, the batting side used to go into the fielding side after each day and have a skinful. After every day? Oh, every day. Every day. Every day, the teams went there. If you didn't do that, you got a red card. LAUGHTER And you were... Was the 80s... Did you have rest days in those days? No, no. No rest days. No, 82, 83 was rest days. and cheese. They were fantastic. Everyone did your church. I mean, the other thing that happened in 86 was Christmas Day.

31:35Christmas Day was a big day on the show. Fancy dress. Fancy dress. So what used to happen, when we played the Vic, we played Victoria the month beforehand. So you put your hand in a bag, you got to choose a letter. The alphabet, the letter from the alphabet. So you didn't have to go down to some fancy dress shop in Melbourne to choose your outfit for what you're going to wear on Christmas Day. So we did that a few weeks before. Then you went, did the tour, got back to Melbourne, and then you went that morning to the box in there, Christmas Eve morning or evening, to get your fancy dress outfit.

32:09Then on Christmas Day, that year, 86, 10 o 'clock, the press threw a champagne breakfast. The press boys started with champagne breakfast, where you went down and you had a couple of hours of that. they're not no practice they go to the MCG we'd already done that a month a girl so they need to go back there and then so afterwards you after that you went back and got into costume yeah into your and I my letter was Zed I went to Zorro full cape and mass and you know that sort of stuff that he saw the bloody hat and anyone like the girl by this stage the girlfriends and family can can join so They had to come also in outfits.

32:54So she was one of my, she was one of my, one of the girls, one of my Zora girls. So she was in the full Flamingo, you know, the old Flamingo dress, the full outfit and stuff. Bloody wonderful. Then we go for lunch, big lunch, obviously on it. And we had to stay in costume until six o 'clock because we were going to appear on the Noel Edmonds show and he wanted us to be in costume. So we couldn't go back to your room. We just kept drinking through the afternoon on Christmas Day so we could be there for for no one right for no what was that sure called no one um not crinkly bottom was it oh yeah yeah yeah yeah mr blobby was on that wasn't it okay yeah yeah yeah he got you'd me did he go up mr blubbie did you yeah what did he do with a queen so I thought it was the Queen I got done like a kipper that must be on YouTube yeah what about this telephone that you do Dickie Bird and did one of you going out to bat and you get that was not in the ashes that was in England yeah that was Dickie Bird's umpire yeah test match you walk out to bat and give your phone to Dickie Bird yeah sorry I've brought me phone out can you hang on to it but how I know those big...

34:17Big Eric's. Yeah, those big Eric's. Beefy made me take that because he had that horse guy, the gorilla, running at 12 o 'clock or half past 12, I think, running. So we said to the openers, don't get out, just take the shine off the ball. We were playing in a one-day game. That's how it used to be. If the openers batted and got 30 after 15 overs, we were doing well. And then Gower went in and we told him to stay a bit longer at the crease. Don't get out straight. First ball, nix it. So now I'm not going to listen to the race. We've all put money on. Beef, he says, take his phone with me and I'll give you a call and give you the result.

35:02I said, no, no, Beef, I'm not taking that phone now. He says, you are taking it out. And he followed me all the way down at Old Trafford. And I had this massive, great phone in my pocket. One of the antenna. Like it's sticking out. And off I walked out there and I got to the middle and I thought, what am I going to do with this phone? Dickie, come down here. Let me, what's wrong? I said, I've got a message for him. As he leant forward, like I took out the phone, I dropped it in his pocket. You know those unbuzzled big pockets? You remember those? Dropped it in, he nearly went down. I said, just take a message.

35:34There's a call coming. He got into such a panic. He was jumping around, fidgeting. Anyway, I took guard and he was standing. you could see he was shaking, something was going to happen. And as Waka Eunice just got in behind him, the phone went off. Beatty had put it on to a loud ring. And Bechtie got such a... Nearly decapitated him. And I looked up there and the phone was still ringing and I looked up and there they're on the balcony, you know, absolutely pissing. So after the game, Dickie gets called in and we think that's us. we're gone. If he says, we better, we better do Dickie here because he's going to tell what's happened.

36:18Anyway, we go downstairs. You remember he had that jag. You remember that old jag he had? He jacked the jag. Put the bricks on it, put it on blocks and that. We wrote to little me, dear Dickie, love, have a safe trip, love Beefy and Lambie. And off we went. And so Dickie went into the media to find their wife and he said, you know, it was such a hot day. He said that he had loosened his tie and he said, a wasp had flown down it. And that's what made him jump like us. So he didn't even drop us. He was so good. He was furious with us. And I think the next game I played, there was a close call for a leg before, you know, decision.

36:59I said, oh, Dick, you never get here. He said, that's out now, piss off. LAUGHTER

37:11At what age did you think, do you know what, I want to go into broadcast. Well, it happened purely by accident because back in our day, and I think it's a great thing that players have 12-month contracts. Now, we have a six-month contract. So, come September, you've got your P60, if you're lucky, or your P45, if you weren't. And a reporting back date, April 4th or something. and then see you then, good luck. So there was no work, no jobs. You had a mortgage or whatever. So I drove a lorry for a couple of winters delivering asbestos. I slightly regret now if I'm on it. LAUGHTER Do you have to take a lorry test?

37:48No, it was a seven and a half tonner. I was more worried about the asbestos. Made windows in a window factory, knocked them together. I mean, anything, anything. And then one year, it was... I'll tell you what it was, when was Gat's tour of Australia Ashes? 86. So it was 86, John Rawling came up to me from Radio Leicester. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Terrific commentator, boxing, aesthetics. Yeah, brilliant. He worked at Radio Leicester. He said, what are you doing for Swinterwester? I don't know. He said, well, come and work with us. Give it a go. Think you'll like it. Think you'll enjoy it. And so I did.

38:18Did the morning shows. And, of course, John then went on to London. And next thing you're up... You know, I just loved radio. So they just threw you on to broadcast straight away? Yeah. Yeah. Put you straight on, they have local radio. It's on Radio Leicester. Yeah, local radio. What, ball by ball? No, just doing breakfast shows and Saturday afternoon shows. In those days, I mean, you're too young to remember this, Alistair. You had things called discs, records. Oh, right, yes, yes. Which were complicated because you played them at different speeds. It was 33 and a third. At 78. So 78 is a real...

38:47Oh, there were 45s. Now, when you're disc jockeying in those days and you're not very good at your learning... Disc jockeying? You're ramming in a record and it comes in at the wrong speed. You quickly crank the speed up. Sorry, I thought you were doing like a flower report. No, I was the bloke in the studio. So when it came to getting advertising for this job, the BBC job, I'd done a bit of newspaper, worked for the Today newspaper, which is a tabloid, which is quite good to have done a bit of that, yes. Writing. But I didn't tell them otherwise, that I wasn't the bloke there with the stopwatch and the reporter and the commentator.

39:23I was the bloke in the studio playing records at the wrong speed. and asking what the score was of the reporter. So they assumed that I did. So my first day on the job, Peter Baxter gave me a stopwatch, a silver stopwatch with a hand. Yes. At Lord's, Champions County against whoever it was, MCC. And I wrote, I thought, shit, 45 seconds for the 11 o 'clock desk or whatever. So I wrote every word and timed it. Yeah, timed it. And then the third over, boom, boom, boom. Anyway, so live, our correspondent, Jonathan Agnew, click, started reading it and a wicket fell out in the middle. Boom. Cheers. I looked up and completely lost where I was at this piece, which is now worthless.

40:04And I never scripted another report. So it's good that I got it wrong the very first time. So now you just click the watch and it's the kind of thing you get used to doing, isn't it, to talk for 45 seconds or a minute or whatever it may be. What year was your debut on TMS? You're in New Zealand. You were there. I was there. LAUGHTER There's about 15 of you. That was that winter. I interviewed him. So, I worked with you in 91. Yes. We go on tour to New Zealand. First test match at Christchurch. Tea on the last day. England need eight or nine wickets to win. I mean, it's a draw. Nailed on draw. He comes on, bowls them out.

40:45It's incredible. So I'm in the commentary box, phone rings, and there's posh voice, woman's voice from London. Hello, is that Jonathan Agnew? I said, yes. He said, would you mind awfully interviewing Phil Tufnell for the Today programme. I said, well, certainly. So I put the phone down, got my kit organised, went outside, I thought, where am I going to find Phil Tufnell? I'd heard a few stories. So I thought, well, I won't bother going in the dressing room. So I went round the back. There were some trees there and he's up against a tree. I was a fag on. So I went up and I said, Philip, I'm Jonathan Agnew from the BBC.

41:16Can I interview you possibly? Yeah, mate. I said, right, OK. So I got my kit out, headphones on, microphone, crank this handle up, and about, you know, wait 20 seconds. Sorry, do what, sorry? Crank this handle. Wait 20 seconds, and this woman's voice again, hello, London. I said, look, it's Jonathan Agnew here in Christchurch. I've got Phil Tufnell with me. Oh, marvellous. Hang on a moment. Let's put you through to the studio. John Humphreys will queue you up. Well, this is my first match, you know, away. John Humphreys. So, anyway, John Humphreys, I can hear him in the headphones. Well, what a performance that was by England.

41:51first test in Christchurch, they've won the game, and I think our correspondent, Jonathan Agnew, is with England's hero, Phil Tufnell. And I said, well, yes, John, I am, I'm here. And, Philip, what on earth happened there? Those New Zealand batsmen had no idea how to play you. I put the microphone on. No, mate.

42:13They were shitting themselves.

42:20Thank you, Philip. I'm back to you.

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45:01What about you two here? I've got both made your test debut in Nagpur. Yeah. All right. Both left-handed. Yeah. Correct. Both support Luton. Yeah. And both took your maiden test wicket against India. Yeah. Well, there's a city there. Both went to school in Bedford. Yeah. Went to the same school? No, no, he went to the rival. I went to Bedford Mould and he was at Bedford School. So you were at the... No, he was probably... Was he the posh school? Slightly more posher than Bedford Mould. Was yours posh? Yeah, yeah, mine was still a private school, yeah. Oh, fantastic. Did you play cricket against him?

45:30No, I didn't. No, I didn't. One became a sir and the other one is waiting to be knighted. There you go. I think you're on the right track. On the right track, yeah. What are you going to be knighted for? Services to mastermind. That's it.

45:46Poor at general knowledge. So when King Charles knights me, I said, why are you here? I said, my general knowledge is poor, mate. Thank you for the knighthood. Who was the question, chap? Who was asking the questions? Ask Monty. Oh, it was... The greyhead fellow. Oh, you know, Humphreys. Channel 4. Yeah, Humphreys. Oh, yeah. Well, there you go. John Humphreys. John Humphreys. Yeah, yeah. Mr Humphreys. Can we recreate it? Come on, then. Come on, let's do it. Yeah, let's do it. Come on. Right, Monty. OK. What's your name? Sir Alastair Cook. Specialist subject. What was your specialist? Cricket. What was it?

46:25I don't know. What was it? Seek and its History, wasn't it? What was it called? Seek and its History. OK, OK. Which 1997 film do a group of unemployed men in Sheffield become strippers for a night at their local working men's club? Oh, gosh. The Full Monty. Did you get that one right? No, I said Dream Boys. I said the Dream Boys. In which cities the Olympic Stadium built for the 1972 Olympics and where Germany's national football team played? Munich. Correct. What did you say on the show? Athens. There you go. Listen, listen. Listen, it's the same continent. It's in Europe. Yeah, it can happen.

47:05That's right. Monty, I've been there many times. When the lights are on. It's tricky. It's tricky. It is. It's quite brave to go on it then, Monty. Yeah, it is. I went on it. Did you guys do it? Premier League football. Premier League football? Yeah, yeah. Did you get any right? Yeah, did it right in football. General knowledge? I have general knowledge, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would go in. I'll tell you what I'd have. I'll tell you what I'd have. Playboy from 1969.

47:33Here you go, Mon. In an 1819 poem, what season of the year does Keats describe as a season of mist and mellow fruitfulness?

47:45What did you say? What was your answer? Can I have 50-50? Bumble, do you know the answer to that, mate? I'm going to say September. Monty's answer? Oliver Twist. LAUGHTER Even I'm finding that funny.

48:08There you go, Mon. Which city is the television comedy series Cheers set? Oh, gosh. Which city? London. No, Boston. Boston. Monty's answer. Go on. America. It's a big city. Elaine, there you go. Oh, good on you for going on. Good on you for going on it. Oh, mate.

48:42Let's finish with a few community questions. I'm going to start with this one, Jimmy. You've been the master of the wobble seam. Oh, yes. Jimmy's asking, and it's not you asking yourself, it's another Jim, how do you bowl the wobble seam? Now, we do demos. Phil, how do you bowl the wobble sim? You're the expert. You get me doing the batting. Come on, how do you bowl the wobble sim? It's all about finger pressure, James, isn't it? Is it? Is it? I've been doing it wrong.

49:14Did you invent it? No. Before we went to Australia in 2010, David Saker was bowling coach and he said, like it only swings for four to six, seven balls. So you need something else. And we were playing Pakistan at the time and Muhammad Asif was creating all sorts of problems for our batters. They didn't really know what to do with him. And he was just getting the seam. It wasn't coming down straight, it was sort of just like coming down a little bit scrambled and then nips one way the other at like 78 mile an hour. so throughout that series I worked on that ball and there's loads of ways you can do it but you just basically, I love having a perfect seam for when it swings so it's coming down like absolutely pristine but you're just trying to almost get it, like back when I first started if you bowled like that, it'd be like, what's that?

50:12Horrible wrist position or something. Something you just did there, right, so when the ball's swinging you're trying to get that backspin on it to hold the seam up, aren't you? So the opposite must be true when you're trying to... Because if it revolves, then it will stay upright. So you're trying to let it come out without it spinning back. Yeah, I did a thing with Wardy a few years ago for Sky, and they used the rev counter thing. And it was like 2 ,000 plus revs for the swing. Spinning backwards. And it's about 800 for the... So you don't want it to... How the hell do you do that then? If it comes out like that, it sort of like wobbles around.

50:51How do you do that? I don't know. So, like, when I swing it, I try and cock my wrist so it really pulls down on the back of the ball. And it's probably not as... Oh, OK. I'm just trying to, like... Not flub it out. No, no, no, you're still trying to bowl it, but not have that sort of same... Not pulling down on the back of the ball. And Jimmy, the finger pressure that Phil talked about. I don't really think about that, but I'll have a chat with Phil later on. Could be a new era. Listen, listen. Go on, go on. Well, hold on. One of the main things I saw about Mitchell Stark and why we got turned over, because he then, he bowled it beautifully, didn't he, in Australia.

51:30I didn't really see him bowl any hooping swingers, even with the pink ball. He just bowled that slight sort of one that goes across, and it nipped, and it nipped. Yeah. So he goes almost like cross the seam like that. so it's more scrambled than what I'd say. So I bowled out. I remember Andy Caddick taught me this off-cutter to left-handers that just sort of drifts away, and that's what Stark was doing. Yeah, he was. He was just running it across. Caddy, caddy shag. Because of that middle finger pressure. I was talking to him in the pub. It was that middle finger pressure that he was doing. He said he was bowling it mainly off of that one there.

52:06Really? Yeah, instead of like... Oh, the boys. Can you imagine? Face and bounce, face and bounce. Sorry, sorry, mate. Can you imagine all the boys... Reminiscing Bob Cotton. Oh, he brought his own boots out. They were call-pacing them out. P &B, yeah. Pakistan. Can you imagine all the boys in our day, though, who were vegies? They wouldn't have got... Again, there'd been all the old coaches behind. No, come on, come on, all that seam's coming down. Why did he call you? What's that? I'll tell you after.

52:41Jimmy, we're going to end up with this one. Jimmy Anderson, the cricketer. Obviously, you'll play this summer, potentially another, I'm not too sure, but what about Jimmy Anderson, the coach? I believe you do. Is that right, Dave? You told us this. Level four, is that correct? I don't know if it's called level four anymore, but I'm doing my... I'm doing... I've just started doing my coaching badge this winter. It's something that I definitely consider going forward. When I had that sort of taste of it with, I was a mentor in that England team, sort of had a taste of it. But I feel like, you know, it wasn't the right time for me to go into that.

53:24And I want to learn more about the art of coaching as well. So I can obviously pass on experiences or knowledge or whatever about bowling. But I want to be able to, you know, tell people with conviction about technique and stuff like that. So actually giving myself something to back up the actual detail. How does that course look?

53:51It's a really interesting question. So it's basically just that there's some elements of putting things down on paper, but a lot of it is coaching-based or seeing you in action so that the guys who do it will come up to lengths and watch me actually hands-on, both from an individual point of view and from a group point of view, and just assess that way, I think. Much in the way of psychology involved in all of that. Because I get the... I don't know. Players expect a different... In the old days, it was kind of like, you do this, do that, or you'll get a smack in the chops type thing. There seems to be the relationship between coaches and players is very different from how it would have been even when you started.

54:41Yeah, that's definitely an element of it, is being able to... I think that's part, the skill of being a coach now, is knowing your players, how you talk to them, how you get your message across, because that will be different for each player. Yeah. May I suggest you stop making it to any fashion danger? Lads, I'll sit. Jimmy, thanks so much. Brilliant. Thank you. Really good. Well done. Cheers, mate. Well done. Well done.

55:18This has been a Global and the Overlap production.

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