Matthew Hoggard: Shane Warne, Brett Lee & England Dressing Room Stories! | Stick to Cricket EP 57

0:00Michael Vaughan: Before we get started, I'd like to thank our partners, Betfair. Hit subscribe so you don't miss an episode. Enjoy the show.

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2:15Michael Vaughan: Hey, I'm Skip. How are we, buddy? How are you, mate? What have you got for us? I've got a bit of burnt-bellied pork ends for you. Oh, look at this. Morning, everyone. Oh, what? Oh, Hogstar! I like this! I like it, I'm very good. Look at this! Is that Alistair? You on? Is it all right? Look it! It's... Tell me about that, Mum. I'm interested in this piece of kit. What's this? Look at this! A bit of a ceramic egg barbecue, Michael. Yes. I know you've got one at home. I've got a red egg, yeah, I've got the Kamado Joe. You've got the Hig. Kamado Joe. I've got the red egg. We've got an Ottermore here from Searsmith.

2:48Michael Vaughan: Right. And we've got... Now, I noticed all your podcasts, you've got Percy Pigs, You've got chocolate rolls. You've got shocking snacks. So I brought you some proper snacks. Lovely, this one. So we've got burnt belly pork ends. Pork ends? Burnt belly pork ends. Oh, burnt belly pork ends. Yeah, we've got... What, straight in? Straight in. We'll whack it on the table. Get them on the table, Og. Oh, oh. Oh, how good are they? A bit of stickiness. So, what? Bit of sweetness.

3:23Phil Tufnell: Oh, my life. Not as much sugar as your sweets that you normally have. Look at this apron. You don't know whether I'm going blacksmithing, if I'm a farrier, or I'm cooking. Bit of leather. Bit of leather.

3:38Michael Vaughan: Bit of Hoggie's grill. Hogster, the sauce, what, you know, have you made that? Do you know what? I've cheated, Michael, because you can make barbecue sauce and you can spend hours and hours and hours doing it. And then I thought, do you know what? It's on you lot. I'm going to buy it. So it's shop-bought barbecue sauce, Michael.

3:55Sir Alastair Cook: Why does that sound... Why do they taste so good? Because they've been smoked for about seven hours. So slow and low, about 120 degrees on the smoker.

4:06Phil Tufnell: In that? In that, no? Not in that one. At home. Yesterday, because we're in an enclosed environment, we weren't allowed to smoke in here, so we decided that we'd be Blue Peter.

4:20Michael Vaughan: So you put your egg at 120, do you just let it go? Yeah, just let it go, put your marinated burnt ends in a bit of dry rub, so I think I went for Angus and Oink and a bit of porky, because it said pork on it and I thought, you know, a little bit of maple, a little bit of barbecue seasoning on it, whack it in, four hours uncovered smoking, wrap it up, bit of barbecue sauce, braise it and then open it up for the last couple. a few beers or a glass of wine or two maybe a few pieces of kit in your garden that green egg so that one that one's not that one's an ottimo that's um a searsmith ottimo so it's um just a ceramic egg but it's similar to the general all the same are they very very similar most important thing you plonk in it is the charcoal what is that yeah because the charcoal gives you the heat gives the flavor gives you the control yeah so if you put rubbish in you'll get rubbish out so put decent

5:18Phil Tufnell: charcoal in you'll get better results right i live in yorkshire now you've you've come to the better side have you so you're the big question yeah how much oh so the this one's about uh 599 the bigger one's 799. that's not bad is it they're not too shabby

5:38Michael Vaughan: in your garden yeah what time is there's a new one called bertha seeing it big bertha yeah it's like a it's obviously an oven but it's i've seen it in john lewis there's all sorts of this charlie there's all sorts of different things but if you think about your grill as a container to hold your fuel and it's your fuel that gives you the flavor gives you the heat and gives everything So fuel is very, very important. All right, so... And you're sort of a proper chef-in now, aren't you? Well, I don't know about a proper chef-in. Well, no. You know, you're a proper... I thought that was the end. That's all the chefs from the past going, you're not a chef!

6:22Do you know you're a proper dancer? No. Yeah, well, I'm not a proper chef. But you can dance. They're very good, mate. Yeah, they're all right. People could... Cheers, Laresh.

6:32Sir Alastair Cook: Nothing wrong with them. I'm going to have to have another one. How often do you barbecue at home? Or do you not? All the time. Yesterday, I did breakfast on it and Sunday lunch, so I did pork crackling yesterday. Did my Yorkshire puddings in the grill. How do you make pork crackling? You've got to take your pork out of the wrapper maybe two or three days before. So, do you know, if you buy it from a supermarket, you're doing it wrong. If you buy it from the butcher, it goes yellowy colour and it's dry. If you don't have dry skin to start with, you're not going to get pork crackling, so make sure you've got it out of the wrapper and you leave it in your fridge uncovered.

7:11Give it a bit of salt so it's all dried and then start it hot and then turn it down.

7:17Michael Vaughan: Have you taught yourself? There's a lot of trial and hours, a lot of courses, been on a lot of... And talking to other people and just sitting around and having big barbecues with other people that do things, you learn from other people. You know the expression in cricket, you learn the game in the bar? Oh, yeah. What's the expression in cooking? Well, to be fair, you learn the game while you're cooking and at the bar because it's almost illegal, isn't it, to barbecue without a beverage in your hand. Of course. Well, yeah.

7:50Sir Alastair Cook: Oh, you can see, what's that called? What's that rim? That's a smoke ring. Yeah, like a bar. Yeah, the bark on the edge. The red bit sort of got into the pork. That's the smoke ring. Oh, look. Oh, right, OK. So that's the hours of the smoke. Where do you get your meat from? I go to Simpson's Butchers, who is twice winner of Britain's Best Butcher Shop. So a local in Stamford, where you went yesterday. Or Saturday, wasn't it? Saturday, wasn't it? So a local produce.

8:22Michael Vaughan: What were you doing there? Buy some meat?

8:24Sir Alastair Cook: No, I was watching Elsie play, she was playing the girls game, and I got... I can't remember the last time Matthew Hoggard rang me, and he rang me, I was like, I can see you. I was like, what are you doing? To be fair, I couldn't see you. I got a WhatsApp, it all buzzed because of the coaches at Stanford. Sir Alistair Cook's here, Sir Alistair Cook's here, Sir Alistair Cook's here. The girls don't know it, but Sir Alistair Cook's here. I thought, oh well, I was at the girls' school, I thought I'd give you a ring. It's Stamford, is that where Dean Edley is there? Dean's gone down to... Well, he left, he went down south.

9:02Sir Alastair Cook: Are you working at the school now? Yeah, I'm coaching at Stamford. You coach all the girls and the boys? All the girls and boys from year 7 to year 13. Oh, so you actually coach the girls which we want? Yes. They ran between the wickets badly. How old's your daughter now? They kept playing great shots of running. I'm like, burning from you. How was your daughter? Elsie's 12th. You had to think about that then, didn't you? You've got to get it right. Is she a... She is a keeper. She keeps and bats. Good. It's right. I didn't get any on the weekend. Is she a got a keeper? No, they're too nice. They're too nice.

9:35Sir Alastair Cook: Didn't get any on the weekend, but she enjoys it. Yeah. Yeah.

9:39Michael Vaughan: It's coaching, I like it. It has its moments, but more or less, yes. The girls are so much easier to coach than the boys. They actually listen, they actually want to improve, they don't think they know everything. Whereas, you know, boys are like, what are you talking about, your old has-been? Did you actually play? Is it just cricket? Yeah, just cricket. No, I don't do anything, I was just cricket. Are you a technical coach or a vibe coach? A little bit of both. Vibe coach? I think you have to have a safe action. And if you've got the safe action, and then it's about making people slight improvements and where the arms and limbs are going.

10:20And then it's a lot of headspace, as you know.

10:24Phil Tufnell: Which schools are in your area? Uppingham, Oakham. Oundall? Oundall, yeah, not too far down. So who's looking after those teams? Rob Taylor is at Oppingham. You ought to know the person at Oakham, and I've got a scuba-loober about Oundall. And big tea's down at... Where's Tudes now? Yes, Kim Bolton. So they're fairly local as well. Yeah, great man, Tudes. Good fun, good fun.

10:53Sir Alastair Cook: Are you still in the beaver? No, I've never been in the beaver. I've always been pottering around the beaver. I've never entered the beaver. I leave the beaver to Agus. He likes the beaver. Because you're always right, aren't you? Yeah, so we're opposite sides of Melton Mowbray. Yeah, so he's actually in the beaver I'm just tickling around and I found out that is it true Is it true that they've named the ring road pork pie road? Yes So they've by bypassed Melton Marbury and pork pie pass. I think

11:31Michael Vaughan: What's that goes like on the old the barbecue is stressful. He's good, but he He likes, he's sort of like mono, gets into it and says, right, then this is what I'm looking after, this is all I'm looking after, and this is all I'm doing. And then everything else is somebody else's responsibility. And he panics. I am connected to his meat probe the other Christmas, I think it was round, and about four months ago I got a... Agus, do you know you're supposed to take your meat off ten minutes ago, mate? Because it connects over the internet. What's the best one to get? A metre. A metre, yeah? What's that for?

12:10Michael Vaughan: It's stick it in. Yeah, so you get a Bluetooth thermometer that you stick into your meat. It tells you internal temperature, tells you external temperature, it tells you how long it's going to cook for. You need to write this down. I like the guessing game of that, though.

12:23Sir Alastair Cook: It's a bit more... I like the old... Do you like pre-cooking the chicken in the oven as well before you whack it on barbecue as well? Or do you chop it in half to see if it's cooked? No, I'd chop it off. Yeah.

12:35Phil Tufnell: Yeah.

12:36Michael Vaughan: You have to wonder, though. I've never...

12:38Phil Tufnell: I'm a novice, complete novice, enthusiast, but... I'm a novice. I panic like... I would panic like mad.

12:44Sir Alastair Cook: Well, you've got to get your hot spots on... What, hot spots not? Not on the spot. No, you've got to get your hot spots. Excuse me. It's another thing you know about. Yeah, you've got to make sure that you're sort of like... Is that right? Air flow. Yeah. Which show was this? I didn't do a show. And also, I've never really got it, though, but I've just started to, is the resting yes you know everyone's but they say they say you're meant to rest it for half but Jesus Christ they've been in there for seven hours no because if you're cooking slow and low you like it like if you go into a warm bath you relax and everything oh if I put you in a scolding bath you'd go you tense up one yeah great yeah yeah so but you don't tense up when you're No, but when you put something hot everything shrinks yeah, you've then got to come back out.

13:40Sir Alastair Cook: Yeah, it's a bit like wine and breathing. Yes, a lot of it is a lot of like if you actually if you actually ate it you wouldn't know.

13:48Phil Tufnell: I thought we were talking about fast bowling.

13:51Sir Alastair Cook: Resting.

13:53Phil Tufnell: There's a lot of that these days. That's all fast bowlers do now. Yeah. Would you be resting? No, you're not playing today. I was annoying enough when I was playing. I'd have been even more annoying if I was resting.

14:07Michael Vaughan: Before we get started, I'd like to thank our partners, Betfair. So just hit subscribe so you don't miss an episode. Enjoy the show.

14:19Michael Vaughan: One word to describe yourself. Conundrum. Conundrum. Oh, I love it. Number one is, what's happened to Lanchi County Creek? Oh, not again. What has it? Have they lost the plot? They've lost everything. Never had it, did you? I'm not rising to this, I'm just not. It's not time to get your dancing wheels on, is it? No, I mean, we used to do it, didn't we?

14:43Phil Tufnell: How about you just get going, I swear. Just getting a bit of lubrication round. He was introduced in the West Indies and opening the bat in his Monte Discotec.

14:57Michael Vaughan: What is your cricket pet hate? 20 minutes for tea. Yeah, should be longer. Should be longer. You can take five minutes getting off, you're five down, you've got ten minutes. Yeah, you can only have two fat eggs. Caught cover, again. Caught mid-off, again. You need good test match tempo. You're having a right to go at them for trying to score far too quickly.

15:17Phil Tufnell: You can put that out, will you?

15:26Michael Vaughan: Can we get on to the cricket now? Sure. I've got a myth buster here. Hog. Whilst England were on tour in India, Hoggard once claimed to have kept himself sane in uncomfortable Ahmedabad by taking an imaginary dog for an imaginary walk. Is that true? It is, yeah. It was... Nurse! Nurse!

15:51Phil Tufnell: Nurse, he's out of bed again. That's exactly the sort of reaction I got. Yeah. And exactly the sort of reaction when we were pulled in with Steve Bull about we've got a spot psychologist. We went, psychologist? What do we want? A psychologist. But we were in lockdown in India. There was nothing to do except for the same 18 people. You weren't allowed out. You weren't to do anything. So you were locked in. What year was this? It's 2002-ish, where Caddick and Croft decided they weren't coming. And I, in my room, I said, right, what am I going to do? And I thought, do you know what? I want to take my dog for a walk.

16:29And you weren't allowed out. So I closed my eyes. And your favourite walk on the farm, you know, where all the fallen trees are, You know where the stumps are, you know where the little stream is, where your dogs like to open. I took my dogs for a walk to get away from India with the pressures and everything else. I actually thought you were walking... I thought you were walking around the hotel.

16:51Sir Alastair Cook: Come on, I thought you were walking around the hotel. What's the... He's got a crap. He's got a crap. He's that hard. You're laughing too hard. So you did it in your head? I did it in my head, yeah. Visualisation. What are you? Do you have a... Oh, no, come here! Down, down! Fenton!

17:12Phil Tufnell: Fenton! Yeah, were you shouting for him? No! So I was just on my... Come here, come here! Yeah, so I was just on my bed, closed my eyes and just walked through the moorway, my favourite walk.

17:22Sir Alastair Cook: Well, I used to do a lot of things like that when I was... It wasn't anything to do with dog walking, was it? We're back in the Vale of Beaver, aren't we?

17:33Michael Vaughan: What are you doing? He's going to clean up some dog shite. These fucking dogs. These fucking dogs are just shitting.

17:45Phil Tufnell: Fucking terrible. Now, make sure you hang it from a tree so people can see. That's it, yeah. Why do people do that?

17:52Sir Alastair Cook: No, they do it outside of Moyer. Why have you got that in your pocket? They're taking the dog out of you. Are they walking back so they have to carry a bag of shit? No, because they leave it there. You have a shit bag in it for you, don't you? You put it in the chest. Yeah, and when you keep it in your pocket, it keeps you warm.

18:08Phil Tufnell: Aw, Oggie. My missus does that, puts it straight in her pocket. Aw. It's tied up in a placky bag. Yeah. Oh, my gosh.

18:18Michael Vaughan: Oh, he's got a marker. Dog, do you remember that barnet? Look at that barnet, yeah. One of Wisdom's cricketers, five cricketers of the year in 2006. Good barnet. Good barnet, that, innit? Who were the other four? Oh, go on. Yeah. Peterson. In when? 2004, Peterson. Kevin Peterson. 2006, you were one of the five. Jones. Simon. Correct. So, Kevin Peterson, yourself. Simon Jones, there's two others. Australian.

18:47Phil Tufnell: Did Warren. Shane Warren. No. Glenn McGrath. No. Ricky Pontine. Yes. One more. Bretley. Correct. Oh, good stuff. Good stuff. It was my year, though. It's not often you get you only get it once don't you?

19:03Michael Vaughan: No, I don't think you did Cricketing career. Yeah, I mean I remember you as a whippersnapper you want coming to Yorkshire and Charging down the hill it's as fast With a skinhead and try to every single one of us it's only on the head Sounds about right. How old were you that? 18 18 because you didn't play much schoolboy I was playing 13 cricket at the age of 18 for Pudsey Pongos Pudsey Kongs yeah and then Phil Carrick came in Phil Carrick on Phil Carrick what are you saying from 13 to first team at Bradford League sent me off to South Africa to play at the Pirates with Richard Lum yes I remember that yeah spent two years at the Pirates got onto the Yorkshire Academy I think I played one or two games for the Yorkshire Academy the rest of the second team and then went to play for East State so I was bowling in the nets at Headingley South Africa lost the test match Paddingley caddy bowled them out you'd have been coached yeah would it would have been coached 94?

20:1794?

20:17Sir Alastair Cook: There's not game cricket we've not been at Yeah. Would it have been 1999? 96, 97. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Assistant coach, Corey Van Sayle. Saw me bowling in the nets at South Africa, said, will you come for cover for my bowlers? And I said, yes. Went to Bluffentine. Hansi Cronje was the captain. Alan Donald was the other major bowler. We had Nicky Boyer, Butter Dippenaga, Hardest Lidenberg. Flat. and flat wickets cooking my balls and um off we went and i learned so much good learning

20:52Michael Vaughan: process that's really interesting in this i mean that just wouldn't happen these days would it i was the only one of the only there wasn't any english overseas pros there i think um kenny benningerman was over there but that was about it as the overseas pros we play with me Sheffield, Colleen. Did he? Are you the same age? No, he's older than me. What are you? I'm 49, Michael. Yeah, two years old. Can I have this last one? Yeah, go back. Here's your one. You've eaten the rest. I have. I mean, obviously, you found your love of meat from South Africa. Built on. But what do you think back then? I think, well, I needed that.

21:34Michael Vaughan: I needed those two years.

21:40You either sink or swim, don't you? There's no cotton wool, there's no right, just try a little bit and if you don't like it, come at you. I was over there and it was right there. I had a point to prove. So I was quite a stubborn person. I quite like to have a challenge. Being over there, I played, I think, two first-class games for Yorkshire. One of them was against South Africa, and I went over as an overseas professional to South Africa. so I had no right to be there. So I had to sink or swim fairly quickly. Andy Moles was my coach. So thankfully all the team talks and everything else were in English because it's a very Afrikaans community in Bloemfontein.

22:20And I've learnt something. Alan Donald used to come down and watch with his little daughter. And I can remember bowling in a game, a four-day game. He wasn't playing because he was playing a test match soon and the ball was reversing. I went down to the fine leg and went, Alan, how do you get it to go out? And he gave me a quick five-minute lesson of how to get the ball to go out. And I got a wicket the next... ..the next ball, or the next over. Then you just turn it round? You stick to batting. LAUGHTER Just turn it round. Yeah, you do. And I got a wicket and the biggest celebration down at fine leg was from Alan Donald because he found that the coaching was fantastic.

23:05And just the fact that you had Hansi had AD, you had to prove yourself, you were playing on flat wickets, the game went like that because if you didn't, you'd have been drunk. What year is this, Oggy? I played for Free State 97, 98.

23:20Phil Tufnell: Was Robin Jackman around at that time? Yeah, he was commentating. So he wasn't coaching then, he was commentating. He coached for a while. Yeah, Robin Jackman was commentator. yeah hotter blumphant oh it's hot kimberley so you do around that time you're in the yorkie team on the just yeah um i made my debut for yorkshire in 96 on the touring team and then in 97 i went off to i was in and around it not last second team rather than the first team and what year was it when suddenly England started to have a sniff um 2000 2000 that was the year we

24:01Michael Vaughan: you didn't you didn't do an a-team did you tour did you know no I did an under 19 tour you did I replace Tudor Tudor got injured in Zimbabwe yeah was he coach

24:12Sir Alastair Cook: yes yeah we stayed at the monomer time on a moment of place

24:25Phil Tufnell: that's when that's when young gareth patty got some bunt well i'm not gareth patty so we're in bullaway or yeah leaving early six o 'clock seven o 'clock whatever on a bus to go to the airport manager comes onto the bus he said there's one or two um the invoices the bills I said oh just shout the names and they'll come up he said Elvis Presley I'm Prince Monolulu so I said would Elvis Presley and Prince Monolulu come and finish them up and he stands up young Gareth I said which are you he said I'm both of them so you know he had to dress him down and look this this is now he gets a report back to you and he he had a little tear in his eye and he said don't tell me dad oh george george yeah yeah can you remember another yorkie who sat next year on that flight into below for out of victoria falls that we started taxi down the runway and had um a little bit of air turbulence and a bit of air sickness.

25:38Mags? And threw up in it. Who mags it? No, it wasn't mags. You? Gav? It was a left-arm seamer, swinger.

25:45Phil Tufnell: Hutchinson. Paul Hutchinson. Paul Hutch. Coach Jersey. Yes. He's coaching, Paul Hutchinson. Yeah, but it was hilarious. Just taxiing down the runway. Sorry, air sick. LAUGHTER

26:03Michael Vaughan: Stick to Cricket is brought to you by Betfair.

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27:30You'll gain hands-on skills to take on real-world challenges and succeed. Your future is waiting, and Walden is here to help you achieve it. Take the first step to make your impact. Visit waldenu.edu. Walden University. Set a course for change. Certified to operate by Shev. Hey, it's Paige from Giggly Squad. You know when you finally get started on a project around the house and then five minutes in you realize you're missing one thing? Somehow it's always that one thing that sends you back to the store. That's why I love this from Lowe's. If you're a My Lowe's Rewards or My Lowe's Pro Rewards member, you get free same-day delivery.

28:07Honestly, Lowe's will make the run for you, making it that much easier to get what you need. Just place your order and Lowe's handles the rest. It seriously makes life so much easier, especially when you've already got a million things going on. Members get more at Lowe's. $25 minimum and loyalty membership required. Order eligible items by 2 p.m. Subject to weight and size restrictions and availability. Terms at lowes.com slash shipping terms.

28:37Michael Vaughan: A few weeks ago now, but what do you make of the curfew with England, do you? Well, if it was in place, then you stick by it, don't you? Especially as a leader, as the person setting the example, you say, right then, lads, 12 o 'clock, let's go. Perhaps we've been a bit too... We've been a bit too lads. It's not time to get your dancing wheels on, is it? No, I mean, we used to do it, didn't we?

29:05Sir Alastair Cook: I mean, he's just getting going at the same time. LAUGHTER Just getting a bit of lubrication round.

29:11Phil Tufnell: You've been honest, it's half one. I'm Butch, I love Butch. You're a great man, Butch. When he played his first match, which he told us about, the News of the World and Sunday people had said, look, you're opening batter, we're in such a place, 12 o 'clock at night, we'll leave it this time, but we'll keep an eye on it. Butch, you've got to be careful. This has never got to bed before two.

29:39Michael Vaughan: I remember in A-Tour in 96, David Graveney was... Who was coach? Gat was coach. I think Phil Neill was the manager.

29:48Phil Tufnell: Yeah, that's true.

29:48Michael Vaughan: Or maybe Grav.

29:49Phil Tufnell: That's true.

29:50Michael Vaughan: And we were a bit raucous. Smokey was... Yeah, he might have been there, John Embry. Adam Oliot was captain and it was loose. It was a loose trip. And Grav put a curfew on us. And I always remember it. he sat in in the hotel and was ticking you off. So I think it was like 1am or 2am, I can't remember. Anyway, he sits there and he ticks you off. What he didn't realise is that he was going to go to bed, wasn't he? So by the time it gets to 3am, he's knackered. He didn't stay up late enough. Yeah?

30:22Sir Alastair Cook: We did that England under-19s, England under-19s, we did that. Under-19s, first trip ever been away, landed in Barbados. England under-19s. My God, we had the curfew after the first day. Bob Cotton, Bob Cotton, Bob Cotton and Willis, Bob Willis. They were sitting there in this sort of like Airbnb as we were bouncing. First time I've ever had a bit of rum, I think. Rum punch. Arbalite. Arbalite. That doesn't shut at 12, does it? Arbalite. It opens at 12. What was the...

30:58Phil Tufnell: The shipping. The shipping. Down to Arbalite. That shipping's down to... Oh, my life. He said, right, 12 o 'clock. Why is it always 12 o 'clock?

31:09Sir Alastair Cook: He said, right, next time, 12 o 'clock.

31:11Phil Tufnell: I took under-19s to West Indies. Yeah. God. Graham Savile.

31:20Michael Vaughan: He was my coach. Under-19s to India. I can remember all that you were concerned about with our batters that were scoring too quickly. And you said, caught cover again, caught mid-off again. you need good test match tempo no gee good test match tempo and you were you're having a right go at them for trying to score far too quickly what do you reckon it was that you suddenly thought yeah cricket is for me um i've always enjoyed it i always wanted to play um but But as in wanted or when I felt... Oh, this is my job. This is it. I'm going to have a career in this. Still thinking about that. I never felt at home saying, I've got a shoe in.

32:12I was worried about my place. I always wanted to perform to make sure that I was playing the next game. So I wouldn't say I was ever thought that I was just... I was always going to play cricket. I always wanted to prove myself. so I'm still thinking about whether it was for me you must have thought in 2005

32:33Phil Tufnell: you're part of a great attack yeah is a fabulous attack wasn't too shabby was it great

32:38Michael Vaughan: you came onto the scene as this quick bowler yeah you were it was bloody quick when he first arrived but then you ended up being a highly skilled 80 one mile an hour 81 yeah it

33:02Sir Alastair Cook: was successful though wasn't it yeah well you got very quickly realized that i'll keep doing this i don't even got it on there but it's i think it's as good as the english yeah yeah Actually to actually just one I was it I was there

33:24Yeah, I was it me done. Yeah, yeah, there you go. Just a little cut on the firing line Don't need to come next to me. I remember in army was Took the seven for 12. Yeah. Yeah, I was sick. I was six slip Vaughn. He was behind me at seven

33:45Sir Alastair Cook: Yeah. You have a leg sling? No. I've seen that pitch, it's a great pitch. Can you notice it all in a horseshoe except for Vaughnie that's behind me?

33:53Michael Vaughan: With a lid on. With someone saying, you're only doing that for sure. I went, what do you mean for sure? It was only where the ball was going to go. Army had it on us. You weren't getting on the front foot were you? I remember that. Was it that trick that Army suddenly arrived with, one of those Swiss ball you have to stretch on? Oh yeah. He suddenly got into, he said he got into Pilates. He was in Jamaica, he had one of them blow up balls, he was doing this job, he means business this week. By the way, he soon disappeared. Which store did he come without his cricket stuff? Oh, that was New Zealand.

34:26New Zealand with his dartboard. Yeah, New Zealand.

34:28Michael Vaughan: He didn't bring any pads, did he? Yeah, couldn't get me in my case, phony. What do you mean you've got two big cricket bags? Yeah, he did. Dartboard, dartboard.

34:36Sir Alastair Cook: Arms and arms. To sell the stag nags head. Arms and arms. It was. Him and Freddys. Anything you wanted, just go to Harman's room. Is that the time when you flew over from the Windies? Scored a ton on debut. And then you had a beer after the game. And a beer? Yeah, it was quite hilarious. What do you want to rehydrate? Well, I'll have a beer first and then I'll rehydrate. You always got stacking as knighters, didn't you? Played one of the best shots ever. What a silly idea that was. I should have done you and run that wicket and got stumped. Still playing one of the best shots ever. I remember extra cover drive You were there My lad takes the mickey out of me He says what did you used to do I used to be a bowler He says how does it work that everybody just remembers you for one shot It's not what to do about you wick It's not what to do about your bowling one shot How old is your lad now?

35:33He's 19 now 19? Ernie?

35:35Michael Vaughan: He's bowling his left arm still Left arm, yeah he's just getting back into it He's 6 foot 4 now Is he? He's a big boy. Is he shy? I hadn't seen him bowl for about a year. Really? Because he snapped his tendons and ligaments in his ankles. Ow. Then he said he was going to play after his A-levels last year. And he went to a water park after his A-levels and jumped through one of the floats and tried to take his toe off. So that broke his toe. So he didn't play that year. And he's played three games this year. So I hadn't seen him yet. I always get asked about Oggy going in at Trent Bridge. Yeah.

36:13Michael Vaughan: And I must admit... You were nervous, weren't you? He's behind me, Wayne's back, making animal noises, as he always did. Brett Lee's bowling the speed a lot, and he's sat there with his helmet on, with his chased bat. I was shaking. You don't like them, sir. I'm so sorry, but they were... I'm in so much trouble.

36:36Sir Alastair Cook: They're the worst bats ever.

36:37Michael Vaughan: I always say in my time playing, captain, if there was ever someone bowling quick, quick, show you back to our Brett Lee, Dale Steck, in the midst of a quick spell, it always used to fucking make me chuckle because I used to always look to my right and it'll either be Ashley Giles waiting to bat or him.

36:56Sir Alastair Cook: Always him going, boy, bowling quick. Is it true, though, in that game, you're like, to Gile, you said, you take Warn. It wasn't me, it was him. So I'll take him. So I'll do it as you say. I'll do it as you say. I'll take what? You said I'll take me at 95 and he'd have to. Sir Alice, that's why he's the CEO now. LAUGHTER Very clever man. You blamed him. I thought you'd been brave. We only needed 12, didn't we? I thought, you know what, I can edge 12. Yeah. Yeah, got to the middle. Giles said it's really tricky. Shane Warne's turning it both ways. Bret Lee's bowling fucking fast. So what we're going to do is, I'm going to take Shane Warne and you can have Brett.

37:38Sir Alastair Cook: You throw yourself in front of Brett. You weren't getting many off Shane, were you? No. And you had Harmy. My edges didn't go that far. And Harmy was going to sweep first ball when he got in, didn't he? Hockey used to stroll out to that night watcher. He used to play a forward defence to every ball. He was a person. Smack, just play forward defence. He'd get wet all of his way. He's still there, Rocks. It was my job. It worked there, didn't it?

38:04Phil Tufnell: It worked, didn't it? It's always amazed me that you get in that situation with a spinner and a rapid. Well, I'll take him and you take him. I mean, so it's gone out the window rotating the strike, is it? Getting singles, that's gone out the window. Oh, yeah. Score. You've got to score. One that I don't give water. You've got to survive first. You've got to survive first. Rotate the strike. Left hand, right hand. If only if it was that easy, Bumble, I'd have batted further up the order, wouldn't I? I'd just, I'd just have Brettley, I'll just walk one there, but shame on it, I'll just knock him in there for one.

38:38I didn't have the skill set. No, it sounds like forward defence.

38:42Michael Vaughan: Do you remember at Edgebaston when we got lucky? That first, second morning we went out to ball. Oh, yeah. Remember that? Yeah. So we were men who, we were men who bowl the night before and it rained so we didn't bowl the ball. we go out second morning and we get out there and we look around and Strasse was meant to be in the cordon I think he's been on the bog so he comes out late so me and him and rather than wait for Strasse to run to the slip we just went oh Aidan's on straight just stay up to show extra cover for a ball first ball he balls this float a little off on it went straight absolutely he was meant to be if he hadn't been having a shit he'd have been in the cordon sliding doors I said, just stay there, that'll do.

39:26Michael Vaughan: First ball, straight to him. And then we made a point of putting... The commentary, oh, that's tactical genius. Big time in here were pissing ourselves. And then we put, every game afterwards, then we put a mid-off right in front of him. And after the game, when we were in the bar, which way you learn the game, he went, that man on the drive really confused me. I didn't know whether to hit it over him or through him. LAUGHTER

39:53Michael Vaughan: Stick to Cricket is brought to you by Betfair.

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42:18When you think of that attack, which ball did you like bowling at the other end to? I didn't care. I mean, Harmy was great because he had bounce. Simon Jones, everybody challenged it in different techniques. He was one of them. Rolls Royce. You had the ability, everybody had different attributes. So if one wasn't working, you could pick somebody else and you could pick the horses for courses. And I think that's why that attack was so important because the technique had to be different for different balls. We weren't just the same trick pony. We weren't just right arm over. Very varied. We all did different things.

42:59Varied attack.

43:00Michael Vaughan: And you had the King of Spain to be able to... Fred. Fred. Fred has been staying in it. Come on, Freddy. Let's turn it around. Freddy, that reverse swing. I mean, do you remember, we saw you must have had a real kind of plan about reversing. We didn't, did we? We had Trez shining it with mirror mints and slip still.

43:18Sir Alastair Cook: Edit that. Edit that. That's when he died.

43:23Phil Tufnell: Everyone was doing it. When we were doing it. So when I'm coached, they've all decided it's a fad. The thing that will shine the ball is sweets and mints. So we've got a psychologist and we've got a trainer. I said, we need a bloody dentist now. All the teeth are going to drop out. All these toffees they're eating.

43:42Sir Alastair Cook: No, that's right. No, but we said, yeah, it's the sugar and everything. So we sent the bloke down to get... It was sugar-free. It was sugar-free. Orbit. We'll think it was Orbit sugar-free gum. Been doing it. Been swinging it. Then when you go to university and the science behind it, the sugar does absolutely bad. Absolute nonsense. It's just visual for us to think, you know, that looks smooth. So you just want it smooth, because the wind doesn't know whether it shines or...

44:07Phil Tufnell: But back in the day, it would be brill cream. Everybody, you know, Fred Truman and all of them, I'll have brew cream in their air and you can see and they go shine it all the myth about putting additives on the book that's rubbish lip silver it's just needed it smooth bit of ass yeah Vaseline we're gonna need a dentist in your teeth are gonna drop out well what year do you reckon you were at your best oh two four maybe 2004 caribbean yeah um and south africa that's great

44:43Michael Vaughan: south africa and smith oh that spell you pulled that uh do you remember who was injured we had uh greg smith going to dinner he was playing whatever or and he hit a cool box and didn't bat until six or seven so he kept on sending everybody else out that's right and we bowled him out in two and a sessions but that game it Jimmy played didn't he yeah and we lost some did I make injured and I'm he was probably no army was but we had it stuff cuz cuz I remember declaring do you want to declare them and the coach wasn't no he wasn't happy thought we should about it a bit longer you talk to the coach by I just thought none was a number so I don't think they can win I thought we'd we'd pull them in okay well we had we had we had Jimmy was was wasn't in any kind of rhythm no there's only really Freddie and Hoggie with a I think army was struggling a bit and it wasn't spinning at all what he pulled a bit they needed over fours didn't they it wasn't like the nice ladies and then the old Hogster produced opening verse where you get seven for seven for you so he sticks off you think Cali soft in first ball first ball thanks Alice yeah first he didn't do anything wrong just played a perfect low defensive snicked off to first slip we're garrant jones dover cross yeah and strauss his choice tres tres pouched it is that what you got smithy albany ended up on his ass no first first things yeah but tres scored 100 and odd and that's because we were in trouble that second in yeah he was he scored 100 nod in that second innings with harmy yes um just to set up a chase um and i got first seven What number of balls in South Africa?

46:21First seven. First seven. No, first six. First six, came back to the final one. Dale's staying caught behind the final one. But I got first six.

46:28Sir Alastair Cook: Were you thinking all ten? I reckon Freddie might have balled all afternoon from one end. He balled quite a lot from the golf course end. Yeah.

46:39Michael Vaughan: That was actually, people talk about how far I reckon South Africa away, that was where it started to click. Well, 2004, I mean, we haven't won in the West Indies for 19 years or whatever it was.

46:49Sir Alastair Cook: in the summer, did you? Yeah. Is that right? Yeah. And we haven't beaten South Africa since Apartheid when we went over. So we got some momentum. Yeah. The West Indies weren't a great side, but South Africa were not too shabby. And Australia weren't too bad on the day. They had a couple of good players. Was that when Lola got 400? Yeah, last game though. Do you know what? I got a flat wicket-itis. You pulled out? You didn't play it? So Gareth Batty still doesn't speak to me. Because Jylo went down with the bug. Yeah, he did. So they picked Gareth Batty. I said the morning of the game, I don't feel well.

47:33And I played. And then after lunch, I was throwing up everywhere. So myself and Jylo didn't play. So Bats had to bowl a few of us. Did. One thing that Brian Lowry didn't like is a finger-spinning-off spinner on a non-turning pitch he took he rolled he rolled your overs

47:53Michael Vaughan: I think I rolled 20 overs in that did you mind oh Gareth I felt for him I had flat with Gareth I mean Lara he's genius isn't he and honestly we try come over the wicket and bring mid on up he'd just dance down whack him out alright put him back let's just try and get him off strike he'd just go one two or three overs later you know we might have just kept him quiet come on Gareth we'll have to gamble again bring mid off up bang six I just took the piss.

48:19Sir Alastair Cook: Who got runners at the other end for him? Ridley Jacobs got under, didn't he? No, I was too busy laying on physios,

48:27Michael Vaughan: going, I'm not bowling. To be honest, Phil, by that time, we were all thinking about what we're going to get signed by him. We were like, can we get his back? Can you remember though he nicked off? No. No, he didn't. Harmy, yes, he did it, that. Snicked it behind. Yeah, he did. Harmy, we had five minutes with Harmy on that. Brian's adamant that he didn't hit it. Who was it that dropped him when he got 500? Scott. Scott, wicket key. Watch it, he'll go on and get 100 now. 500 later.

48:59Phil Tufnell: 500.

49:02Michael Vaughan: Retirement in 2013, I think you said this, I tried my hand at foreign currency, insurance, coaching, commentary, didn't fall in love with any of it. No. Then your missus got pissed off with you and said, right, you need to find something you're passionate about. You said... Eating and drinking. Eating and drinking. Yeah, that's about right. So eating and drinking. And as we've already discussed, I went to South Africa at 18, fell in love with the braai, standing around fire, cooking meat, eating, drinking. It's a bit of a bloke thing, that, isn't it? Fire, isn't it? Yeah, and a bit in the under...

49:40Phil Tufnell: We are fascinated with fire. I love a fire. Neanderthal, you're right. Neanderthal, I can't. That's where we started. Sit and watch it. I loved it. It's snow. Sit and watch your fire. Oh, I love it, yeah. Put some more on. Get some more wood. In Blumphantown, we had two piles of wood. We had a big stack of wood that was softer wood, which was called drinking wood, and a smaller pile that was called cooking wood, which was the hard wood to cook on. And when we started cooking, you put the soft ones to start the fire off. So when people came out, they'd go, is food ready? No, the flames are too big, we can't cook on it yet.

50:15So when they went back inside, we'd chuck more drinking wood on. And then when we wanted to cook, we put the cooking wood on. So this big stout went down here while we had a few drinks, and then we put the cooking wood on. Drinking wood.

50:26Sir Alastair Cook: Drinking wood. Malignum Vitae. That's what they use for crown green, it's the hardest wood. Yeah, I think that is. The sacks use briar wood. You never see CMA's Vitae. Where's that? Camille Durran. Camille Durran. All right, okay. Mapani. Roycons. All right, okay. You might be out of your depth here. Oh, he's got you here. I think he has. That's the only one I've got. He's the only one you need, though, for a quiz.

50:54Michael Vaughan: He's the only one you need. Oh, you've not been without your difficulties. No. Since retirement. How are you now? How's life? Yeah, all good. Getting there? Yeah. Lots of exciting stuff coming up. In food or in food. Yeah. Yeah, not in cricket. I'm a bit too old for that now. So what's what's potentially in the pipeline for the food? New venue. See these hoggy grills. They're a corporate And about it you take yeah, so we do corporate entertainment We we had a few in last week But we were a barbecue school where you can book on as an individual and learn how to and barbecue properly. You can book masterclasses at one-to-ones.

51:41We do corporate entertainment. We do Christmas parties. We do... Relish.

51:45Sir Alastair Cook: Do you start with the course with your drinking, and then you say,

51:48Michael Vaughan: yeah, drinking for the first thing we have as the course? I think we've got our stick to cricket Christmas party. Yeah. Stick to cricket Christmas party at the Oggy Grill. Please.

51:57Sir Alastair Cook: Turkeys, beef, and... I'll bring the turkey. Why? I'll bring the turkey. We've only got it all covered.

52:03Michael Vaughan: What are you bringing, Dave? You bring the veg. Onions. You bring the veg.

52:05Phil Tufnell: Onions and taters. They are nice. Yeah, lovely. Bit of roast tatties on. Oh, I've got some lovely potatoes. I'll bring the turkey, I'll bring the lamb. Are they good now?

52:13Sir Alastair Cook: You'll bring a whole lamb and the turkey. You bring the beer. Yeah, I'll get the beer.

52:18Michael Vaughan: You bring your wines.

52:19Sir Alastair Cook: Where's the wine? Can you bring your best ones?

52:22Michael Vaughan: Not that. I'll bring my best ones. There's a couple of dodgy wines.

52:24Sir Alastair Cook: Excuse me.

52:27Michael Vaughan: Oh, fair enough. I'll get them off. Tough as tipples. Be careful we don't miss out on this.

52:32Phil Tufnell: Yeah, we could miss out on this because we didn't get the birthday party. What, TT? We'll get you a Christmas one. Well, me and you, we'll go, won't we?

52:41Michael Vaughan: We'll go. Stick to Cricket is brought to you by Betfair.

52:50Michael Vaughan: We're just going to do a quick fire with the Hogstead. Can you... And then we're going to do... You've got to pick your best 11. Oh, yeah. Who you can play with, so that's Sir Alice's segment. Can we... Are we having the... You get that ball while we ask him a few quick fires Right Augusta quick fire with Augie favorite ground Newlands favorite wicket Jack Callis favorite innings with the bat Trent bridge red ball white ball pink ball red ball favorite mode of dismissal court slip favorite field in position long fine leg favorite bat sponsor Oh Woodworm. Best cricket lunch? I was with Woodworm.

53:33Were you? When? End of my career. Not for England? No. Oh, yeah, a little bit. A little bit with England, yeah.

53:42Sir Alastair Cook: What? I met Simon Millers, Simon Millington. Yes. Yeah, yeah. We were Swiss Cottage Marriott and I was sat with him, what would it take me to get to Woodworm? I said, well, I do like socks. and I need golf balls. So the next two days I was at home, this big delivery came, a massive box of them Horizon socks and a load of golf balls that said Hoggy loves socks on them.

54:08Michael Vaughan: I went, right, I'm wouldn't. I'll be. Is that all it took for you to find a bat deal? Yeah. A few socks on the golf ball. Cheap. Best cricket lunch? Lords. Favourite batting partner? Oof. Anybody that could bat. What area would you like to have played cricket in the most? I'll stick with mine. Yeah, fastest baller you've faced? Fidel Edwards bowled me the quickest spell. Where was that? Old Trafford? Old Trafford as night watchman. Thorpey broke his thumb and said, can you stay down that end in the morning? And I told him to get Forkstra off to Oxford very quickly. Toughest batter you bowled to?

54:46Michael Vaughan: Lara. What is your cricket pet hate? 20 minutes for tea. Yeah, should be longer. Should be longer. You can take five minutes getting off, you're five down, you've got ten minutes. Yeah, you can only have two fat eggs. What is your cricket guilty pleasure?

55:06What's guilty? No idea. Guilty pleasure. Shining the ball. Sweet.

55:13Michael Vaughan: What delivery would you like to steal from another bowler to add to your game? Oh, the doosera. I'd love to be a doosera. I'd love to be a doosera. LAUGHTER A wasting and wasting three strokes. No, I just want to step and fetch it. LAUGHTER Erm... Favourite nickname in cricket? Scuba.

55:36Sir Alastair Cook: Scuba...dive? Scuba... Scuba Diver. That's your nickname? It's not my nickname, no.

55:43Michael Vaughan: Who was it? You played with him. Oh, right, brof, yeah. You're a brofie. Favourite post-cricket career...? Brophy, wasn't it? Jared Brophy, isn't it? Is that right? Yeah. What, why is that? I don't know. I have no idea. You do the maths. Favourite post cricket career move of any place you've seen? Goff on Strictly, Flintoff on Bullseye, etc, etc. Can I go hoggy with barbecue? Yes. Absolutely can. Favourite sports team outside of cricket? Rhinos. Leeds Rhinos. How are they getting on? Top of the table. Are they? Wolves are up there, aren't Warrington? Yeah, it's 32nd. Favourite car? Pick-up. Pick-up?

56:30Michael Vaughan: Best TV show?

56:34Michael Vaughan: He don't watch telly. No. He don't watch telly. No, he watches football, that's it. Football? Football and racing. Big Bang Theory. Be up there. All right, nice. One word to describe yourself? Conundrum. Oh, I love it. Right, we're going to pick your... Where is it? Lewis? Has he gone?

56:57Sir Alastair Cook: Yeah, I'll get it.

56:58Michael Vaughan: Has Lewis gone? Come on, Louis. Come on, Louis. Lewis, boy.

57:02Sir Alastair Cook: Did we... Get this in. Beefy's team wasn't as good as Shaggy's, was it? What word did you come up with, Alistair? For what? One word. For you? Look at this. Do you remember when I didn't speak to you as captain? Yeah. That was just... I was MCC captain. He declared on us. I said, if you declare on us, because nobody's going to win this game, I'm not speaking to you. I was told we had to declare. So he declared. So I was good to my word. I didn't speak to him. I never thought you would have been swayed. I was literally 19. Can you... Umpire, can you ask Hoggie

57:43Michael Vaughan: what he wants to bowl? We used to have those kind of games in the Yorkshire dressing room, didn't we? Back in the day. So, David Byers captain, first person to speak to him. Lost. That's a good guy. Bingo, come in the dressing room. So, Matthew, which end do you want a ball to?

58:03Michael Vaughan: I have to buy a round.

58:06Sir Alastair Cook: We had a six, it was a verve ball. So when Harmi was at his best, like, you pick a ball in the over, and six of you play. If you've got a wicket on that ball, you owe the other five bottles of champagne. Brilliant. That's the difference between south and north. Bottles of champagne. But it's watching people get out and you're seeing the bloke who's just lost. Like going like this. Brilliant.

58:30Michael Vaughan: Right, Og, you've got to play with these players. Who's opening for you? Oh, well, well, we will.

58:34Sir Alastair Cook: Have a think. Have a think of South Africa and all these other little teams. South Africa, England, Leicester. Trez is up there. Triscothic. We'll have a Triscothic. Just put Trisba. Oh, God. He knows how to do it. Oh, see, you're better than me. Better than me. You've got a job.

58:52Phil Tufnell: Nice start. It was introduced when we were in the 19s in the West Indies. And opening the pattern is Monty Discoteque. LAUGHTER

59:09Monty Discoteque. Oh my God. Who have we got as another opening batters?

59:14Sir Alastair Cook: You got Schaaf? Yeah, let's put Schaaf in. Let's put Cook. Let's put Cook. He's got over 12 ,000. Let's put Cook. Let's put Cook. I was just... Yeah. Overseas or...? Yeah, Yorkshire. Leeman's got to be in there. Leeman has got to be in there. Doesn't he have to be three? He's got to be five. What about Rich? Richie Rich? I didn't play with Richie.

59:38Michael Vaughan: What about Peterson? Yeah, he's got to be in there, unfortunately. KP? Yeah, KP. Five? Yeah.

59:48Sir Alastair Cook: Did you play with Root? Did you play with Rooty? I don't think I did play with Rootie. No, you wouldn't have played with Rootie. You played with Vaughan? I did play with Vaughan, but are we plunking him in at three? It's your team. It's your team, Rob. Who was your free state? West Indies, yeah, free state. Not West Indies, South Africa. Not massive. Overseas for Yorkshire's just six times. and then let's have Vaughn at three. Very kind mate, very kind. The one thing we know, this ain't winning beating Shaggy's team.

1:00:14Michael Vaughan: No, no, no, we're not winning anything with this one,

1:00:16Sir Alastair Cook: but we'll have a laugh.

1:00:18Phil Tufnell: Well, Flintoff at six.

1:00:19Michael Vaughan: Yes. Flintoff will be in there, so yeah, six or seven. We've got to be six, haven't we?

1:00:25Phil Tufnell: Which do you think? Let's go... Who's your keeper? Let's go six.

1:00:30Michael Vaughan: Michael Bevan, Darren Lehman. Who we got, Bevan? Blewett, Elliot. yes my baby i can't try to cook off you in the final truscothic remember that this is a test match the only yeah um i'm going to put um foster foster lovely keeper need a good keeper yeah yeah yeah you've got to catch them armeson jones and flint off because i do like them yeah so i'm jones No, I don't have to play oh you can do that kind of kind of a happy to all of course you can yeah But put Jones and army nine and a spinner and I'm thinking about my spinner

1:01:09Phil Tufnell: So it's don't you see Jones and army so I can like I can buy you a couple

1:01:14Sir Alastair Cook: Jimmy you've played Jimmy Jimmy Jimmy, didn't you? No, 11. Jimmy's 11. He's better than Harmy. It's for a fair Harmy had a sweep. We'll have Jimmy there. We'll have Jones at 10. It's got to be mainly English here. You only played for Yorkshire Free Street, didn't you? Oh, Leicester. Any Leicester players? Oh, Leicester. Any Leicester players? We've got Flintoff, Jones, Anderson. We need... Harmerson. Harmerson, 2004 Harmerson. Oh, God, yeah. I mean, that's a good bowling take. You need a spinner, I reckon. you got your four quicks we've got giles and giles he's a bit of glue with a little erythra in any team or anything glue with it gareth batty the sixes count yeah yeah yeah Six or so, who did we ever see?

1:02:05I'd say Jair Saria, but he won a spinner. He could have gone up there for eight. Well, you've got to play with great, isn't your boss?

1:02:11Sir Alastair Cook: You'd have Jair Saria instead of cook. No? You'd fancy Jair Saria on a nipper, though, wouldn't you? I don't think we're beating Shaggy's team. Who were your spinner at Leicester? Claude Henderson. Claude Henderson. Ashley Giles. Let's put Gilo down there.

1:02:30Michael Vaughan: Yeah, Gilo in there. They said. Yeah, it's Wormen-like. Get in. Who's your captain? Oh, it's got to be you, hasn't it? Oh, nice choice. I'll skip for that team. Which one?

1:02:42Phil Tufnell: Vaughan. Which is captain? Vaughan. Vaughan captain? Yeah. What about cup? No. No. He declared on me when he shunted them. I didn't speak to him. That's a quiet, achieving team, that. Workman-like. No, that's a solid team. They'll surprise a few people. That's a solid team.

1:03:08Sir Alastair Cook: If they're at their peak of that power, that bowling is...

1:03:11Phil Tufnell: We've got 20 wickets in there, haven't we? Yeah, definite. You've got some firepower here. Set it up. Set the game up. Firepower. Blitz it. Catch everything. Glue. Knock your head off. We're getting blown a lot.

1:03:30Sir Alastair Cook: I'll tell you what, Lehman, what a player. Lehman, yeah. What a player. Goffey would be on the fine team, wouldn't he? Goffey! Yeah, but wait, who am I replacing Goffey with? Yeah. At the peak of their power.

1:03:43Phil Tufnell: Goffey will say, oh, fucking love.

1:03:48Michael Vaughan: We saw Lehman play some innings at Yorkshire.

1:03:52Sir Alastair Cook: You only had batters, didn't you? I suppose Lehman was there for years. We had Lehman. We had Michael Bevan. Big game, old traffic.

1:03:58Michael Vaughan: Yeah, but he was a cycle. He did, yeah, I was playing.

1:04:01Phil Tufnell: Yeah, so we fucking run him out. Yeah, we did.

1:04:05Michael Vaughan: Yeah, Lehman. Didn't we see him play some innings for you, Buckshire? Graham ran him out.

1:04:09Phil Tufnell: Graham ran him out, directed it. Did he? Yeah. Oh, yeah, it was that. I nearly jumped off that balcony. Because we put it on the board, we run him out. Lehman. When you're bowling for runouts, you know you're in shit. I couldn't think of a way we'd get him out other than run him out. That's when Lancashire were a cricket club. I reckon we should start a thing about getting Bumble back to Lancashire.

1:04:31Michael Vaughan: No, well... Interestingly, Matthew, community questions, number one is what's happened to Lancashire County Creek? Oh, not again. What has it? They've lost all the top hierarchy, aren't they? They've not produced. Have they lost the plot? They've lost everything. Never had it, did you?

1:04:53Phil Tufnell: I'm not rising to this I'm just not OK Well you generally do after a minute With all your history and everything else you've got to protect This is interesting Matt

1:05:04Michael Vaughan: number two question Do you know what that's the first time you've ever called me Matt Alright Matthew Matthew will Lancashire County Creed Club ever win anything again Oh for Christ Not with the current regime No No I think it's time for change I think we need to get the top out top bottom This is another one actually those first two were from the same guy This is from the same person as well mr. D Lloyd from York Do you think like Chicago Creek Club need a new board? Yeah, well if my Instagram was all to do with or was it? X that I kept on getting pestered by a G Lloyd to sign a petition Alright, so I get get into the Lloyd.

1:05:45Michael Vaughan: Yeah, yeah I'm not who and five another one from mr. D Lloyd in York is Old Trafford a concert venue or a cricket club or a hotel venue yeah I think it's more of a concert venue nowadays right yeah oh this is one away from that favorite kit you ever played in orange you might orange one with

1:06:06Phil Tufnell: Oh yeah the orange Yorkshire tea we did an advert for Yorkshire tea didn't we we did yeah that dog that dog on it wasn't it brilliant you watch your tea what was your line do you remember your line yeah i can't remember can you remember your line yeah yeah i can't remember i can remember when we when yorkshire tea first came around the all the journalists were coming around all the players so we were sponsored by techless why is why is beer better why is tea better than me why is tea better than me it's not apparently don't go down too well watch your tea what's your tea betty's in detail yeah yeah great cakes lovely cake we did we did a we did a specs specs at that cricket club down south with dan whiting something yeah when was this should have gone to specs long time since uh biggest joker in the dressing room McGrath you Did you stick my my blazer buttons to the dressing room?

1:07:18No, who was it?

1:07:19Michael Vaughan: I'm not dead. I'll put my Yorkshire blazer rose on the on the chest Wait in the dressing room Get up. Yeah, right went to get it. I had to wear it first day It'd been there they did super glued the Super glue my buttons today is either Maxwell Gav isn't it well I'm led to believe recently Yorkshire played down at Somerset Steve Kirby's coach at Somerset Jack the snipper back I believe the snipper struck I think the Yorkies have snuck in and got rid of I think I think the snipper that was a long process wasn't it Yorkshire snipper Alan did that go on for the snipper years it was there before I got into it were you playing at Eastbourne when we played at Eastbourne and it was one of those four day games Thursday, Friday, Saturday, finished on the Monday, played on the Sunday League on the Sunday.

1:08:12Michael Vaughan: And Sussex were chasing on the Saturday, weren't they? And we were pissing. There were seven down, pissing it. Anyway, whoever the snipper was, thought, perfect time to get the skipper. Snipped David Byas' socks. I did, yeah. Do you remember that? It wasn't like a warm-up. Right? Until we find out who did it. I think 120, they won. We dropped, I dropped about three. Went absolutely hate shit in the dressing room. Bevan's in there and all of a sudden we see the skipper going in the shower I could have been blind and he'd get showered first He's had enough of us and he's leaving that Yeah, he's meant to put his sock on Next day 40 over game We went out to warm up he went sit around it He said we aren't warming up until someone admits to cutting my socks We sat there for an hour just sat there You could see odd shoulders just giving in the hole Which one of you is going to be man enough to come up and tell me who snuck my socks?

1:09:11No one did that.

1:09:11Michael Vaughan: We did warm up, we absolutely hammered them. We hammered them, didn't we? I remember he's born, because Anthony McGrath was singing Man United songs at about 2am. Woke me up, I was rooming with him. He was coming along the promenade. Coming on the promenade! About 2am. No coffee was back then. Was it Lawrence Byford? I think he might have been the press at the time.

1:09:36Phil Tufnell: Sir Lawrence Byrne. Yeah, yeah. Please, please.

1:09:39Michael Vaughan: And Mags was singing songs, I think. Can you please be quiet, Anthony? It's a bit late for that kind of noise. The President. Ogy, brilliant, thank you. Thanks for your feedback. Thanks for the glove, mate.

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