Chris O'Dowd & Dawn O'Porter

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1:04Hello, welcome to Table Manners. This is a very special episode. We are backstage in the Union Chapel in Islington, and we are going to be doing a Choose Love Christmas Table Manners live special. And we have the most gorgeous guests, Chris O'Dowd and Dawn O 'Porter. And mum has cooked a lot. I've cooked a lot, darling. Tell us what you've done, because we've done these live shows before, and it's quite hard to eat and chat. Yeah, so I've just made little picky bits, some sausages, some parmesan crisps some crab meat with radicchio crab meat with chicory some prawns with coriander and chilli yeah just little things to pop in your mouth gorgeous and we have a dairy free person and a gluten free person your favourite kind of guest my favourite kind of guest so we're going to be talking to the guests to a rammed union chapel and we can't wait it's for a really good cause Choose Love do really important work for displaced people and refugees all around the world.

2:03And so everyone has bought a ticket tonight and that's going towards Choose Love and the 41 countries that they help in crisis. And there's merch stand, so I'm going to be telling people to be buying some more merch and it's just going to be a gorgeous... We haven't done a live show since Jordan Stevens. Oh, yeah. Which was gorgeous. We love it. Our crowd are the best. Our audience are the best. And I can't wait.

2:50Good evening, Union Chapel. How we doing? Oh, this is lovely. Hold on, I'm going to take my glasses off. Jessie, you can't see anything anyway. I can't see anything. I can't see anyone. Is anyone here we know? Oh, thank God for that. Thank you so much for being here tonight. This is a very, very important cause. And by you donating and paying for a ticket, you have just helped Choose Love so much. And refugees and displaced people worldwide get help. So this is a live episode of Table Manners. Who has been to one of our live shows before? Okay. Okay, we've got some old timers over there, we've got some newbies, but we do have charitable people in the audience and I may just have to ask you to spend a little bit more later, but we'll chat about that after you've had a few drinks, okay?

3:43How are you, Mum? I think I'm okay. You look quite startled, Len. I am startled. Also, I'm just going to let you know that Mum and I do talk on the phone about five times a day. However, we turned up with two outfits. Basically, Mum had one outfit that was the velvet with fluff or a sparkle. We look like we're in bloody Abba. I don't know whether it's because we're so in sync now, Mum. Yeah, we're in sync. Or because we don't communicate enough to let each other know that we're in the same clothes. I think I communicate, Jessie. Can I just ask, who speaks to their mum more than twice a day? Oh, their dad?

4:25Yeah, yeah, okay. How many are you on? You live next door to your mum. Jeez, okay, that's lovely. That is good, that's great. That is lovely, yeah. Beware, Jessie. I've told you to move to New Cross. You won't do it. Yeah, I will. You will? Maybe. I've got the granny. You just don't want to be in the basement. No, I don't. No, fair enough. I want to be in the penthouse. Okay, fine. So you already know who the guest is today. guests and we are so thrilled to have this couple on today Dawn O 'Porter and Chris O'Dowd

5:07and well Dawn is a co-founder of Choose Love so that's just really important and special and she'll be telling us a bit more about that but thank god they're professionals as well who's got leopard print on tonight thank you That's really good. It's fab. Any other leopard print? Hi. What's your name? Becky. What? Oh, wow. Ooh, Becky. Love it. I love it. You've got leopard print trousers on. Yeah. Yeah. I need to get my... Has it got pearls? Anyone got pearls? No? Okay, cool. I've got my pearls on time. Oh, thanks, Mum. Pushy Jewish mother right over there. I love you. Right. Should we introduce our guests?

5:50Chris O'Dowd and Dawn O 'Porter. So please come to the stage. Whoa.

6:09Hi, guys. Thanks so much for having us. Are you going to take your coat off? I will. Are you staying? I was going to see how the first couple of minutes went.

6:21lovely spot you got here i love this i've never seen this the napkin is in a little heart shape can i tell you why well choose love obs and that is a darling sophia who works on um our team and she's a lovely greek goddess where are you sophia working somewhere hard on more how good is that that's really it's really cute it's nice isn't it How are you today, guys? We're good. I'll speak for you. I'm well. I'm well. I'm good. I was away for the weekend. I was down seeing a friend in Weymouth, so I'm feeling slightly the worst for wear. Not to, you know. That's the name of the new podcast. Surely that'll be a good one.

6:59That's for wear. Yeah, that's the day after, the day before. What did you do in Weymouth? What's going on in Weymouth at weekend? We killed a man. But that wasn't the intention going in. I've revealed too much we went down to see a friend who's moved down there and they were unwell so it was his partner's 40th so we did some boogying and we did some shaking indeed and both of those things went well was the food good what did you eat there was a lot of snacks well you said you had a disappointing burger we did well during the day there's great food in Weymouth you see and so we put a bit of pressure on it and we just didn't live up to our own expectations.

7:45We kind of had a very mediocre burger and we were like, ah, what a shame. We missed an opportunity here. Dawn, were you there too? I wasn't, no. I was weirdly in London having a terrible roast. I went to a pub. It took like an hour for the roast to arrive. I can't eat gluten. They put down this absolutely massive Yorkshire pudding and I said, is that gluten-free? And they went, yes. And I went, wow! I ate half of it and then just like shake and back dive towards me and like grabbed it out of my hand. I was like, I'm sorry, I made a mistake. There was that. What happens when you eat that then? I basically go into labour.

8:21Oh, man. Yeah, it's terrible. And so it kind of sent it back and everyone was very apologetic. Which is more fun than you'd think. And then the next roast chicken that arrived was raw. It wasn't good. Oh, yeah. It was really bad. Did anyone else have a poor roast yesterday? Did anyone have a good one? Hold on, hold on. Was that somebody saying they had a bad one? It's unusual. Even though there wasn't up there. I thought God was up there. And he had a terrible roast. That was his last supper.

9:05What was so bad about yours? this is my issue with it's always dry they didn't even give you gravy not moist in the famous words of Rick Astley are you moist that should have cut you know we're doing a quiz later but for now let's go back to 40th anniversaries you two met at your 30th yeah it was we were both living out in LA but separately I'd been out there for a year and I was having a party my friend had lent me her Pilates studio for my 30th birthday party which is the most LA thing ever we kind of moved all of the um all of the reformers to the side and one friend bought me a dance floor for the night and then two other friends because I was born in Scotland played bagpipes for me are these all American were they Scottish they were all like expats okay so they yeah they were Scottish men playing bagpipes and then not that many people came because I didn't know that many people and everyone had left by 9.30.

10:04And Chris had introduced himself to me on Facebook weirdly in the run up to this party. Because we were cool. And he said, do you want to go bowling? And I said, no, but I'm having my 30th birthday tonight, so just come and bring all your friends. So was that you asking her out or trying to be a friendly person in LA? I was a big bowling fan. I don't know if you've still ever been bowling. No, no. Had you ever been bowling before? No. No, okay. But I saw it on the telly and I was curious. Okay. I actually was coming over and I didn't really know anybody either. And so I asked a mate of mine who was also an actor, Nick Frost, lovely actor, and if he knew anybody in town at the moment.

10:53And he said, oh, you should look Dawn up. I know Dawn a bit and she's good crack. and so I sent Dawn a couple of friend requests on the Facebook and forgetting that my profile picture on Facebook is octogenarian Floridian lady and so it's just this kind of old floral lady and Dawn didn't, this was 15 years ago I suppose so Dawn said no a couple of times and then she was short on numbers for her birthday so invited me along and so I met her father I was dancing with my dad everyone else had left and I was dancing with my dad on the dance floor that my friends got me and and then this guy just walks in what was the song playing?

11:44oh I don't remember it's raining men I just remember I always describe it as this I just remember like thinking the wingspan on this man who just came towards me with his arms wide open and we just danced and he kind of flung me around my dad obviously just stepped aside Dawn's dad is like a guy my height with a beard from Scotland and I'm still fairly sure she's drunk and thinks she's still dancing with him it was just a straight swap from one Celt to another but yeah and I remember the next morning I was in bed with my sister and I was like that guy, I think I'm going to marry that guy and so I text my friend and I said whose Pilates studio it was oh no I had to go there to clear up the Pilates studio at like 7am because the classes start at 8 o 'clock and I remember I walked in and she went I'm going to marry that guy and I was like no no no back off bitch and so we had a little bit of battle and then she went it's your birthday you go for it I let them decide

12:53did you fancy him straight away I did fancy him straight away did you fancy her straight away and before I knew Dawn off the telly because she had done the docs and I was like oh she seems cool and she was kind of doing interesting work and all of that well when I googled Chris I was like the IT crowd what the fuck is that I don't think she's seen it yet. No I haven't. I love it but at the time I hadn't and so that was it. I think you moved in with me three months later. Well you were fairly broke. I was like will you move in and pay my rent? Let's take it back to both your childhoods. We went together.

13:41Can you paint the scene of who was around the dinner table, where you were and what was a very memorable childhood dish? Dawn first? Well, I went to live with my aunt and uncle when I was 10 and suddenly food just became this unbelievable adventure. Before that, I'd been living with my grandparents and they weren't really into food. It's very basic 80s Finder's crispy pancakes type food, which is fine and delicious. But then I moved in with my aunt and uncle and suddenly we grew up on Guernsey's. It's just like seafood and no meal was ever the same. Like there was capers and olives and side salads and just fresh oysters and just all of this amazing food and incredible Sunday roasts.

14:20And I just feel like I, at age 10, got this culinary wake up. And I've been really passionate about food ever since. But I remember just being so excited about what my auntie was going to cook. Very buttery, salty seafood. I mean, delicious. And who was around that dinner table then, your auntie, your uncle? They had kind of a big crew of mates. There was a few different families. And I remember my uncle, we've got like a normal kind of eight-seater table. And my uncle built this big topper for it that would sit, I think, about 16. So that would kind of get carried in on a Sunday morning. And then we would all just sit.

14:59And yeah, a couple of families, loads of pets, loads of food. And hours and hours and hours at the table. And did you ever get involved in cooking any of those meals? Because I know that you love to cook. I love to cook. And you love to host. I love to host. I would have been helpful, but my auntie was definitely had it under control. Okay. But she would kind of call us in to do bits and bolls. But I definitely picked up a lot. That really lovely kind of old school home cooking. They're having a chat. What are you chatting about? I think he needs more tea. Do you need more tea? Oh, yeah. More tea, Vicar, please.

15:37I think we have to go off to get our tea. Mum, ask Chris. I was asking you if you wanted tea. No, I'm sorry. Chris what you might not know about me is that I'm actually Irish as well do you know what there was something wonderful about you that I couldn't quite place I have the passport anyway do you? oh good for you my treasured harp embossed passport you know that it's the only passport in the world that has a musical instrument on the front of it which I think speaks to it speaks volumes about the Irish there was a time that the harp was illegal in Ireland and Henry VIII would chop off the fingers of a person that was found playing it.

16:17You're kidding. No. So I think there's... Are you kidding? No, no. Is this a true story? No, this is true. Oh my goodness. What? And therefore, that's I think why it has such cultural significance. You weren't allowed to play the harp in Ireland, Henry VIII. I don't know that he's teasing or not, Jess. Knowledge and humour are terrible bedfellows. They are. Did we get Chris's childhood food? No, I'm just starting on that. I'm not sure I got it myself Jessie has mum told you that she's Irish yet yeah

16:49that's Sarah Jane who's just got her passport great brilliant I now need the documents to get my yeah cheers so where were you born I was born in the northwest of Ireland called called Roscommon well I was born in Sligo which is a few minutes down the road and so I was the youngest of five so it was a busy breakfast dinner table my mother who is now a therapist was a wonderful cook but I'd say a reluctant caterer understandably but did incredibly and it was you know a lot of great the produce up around where I am is gorgeous lovely butter and bread and shit you know all the proper the sausages even I was back last week I'm like there's something about the sausages.

17:41The sausages are really good Nana's sausages. They win quite a lot of awards. Oh, not her actual sausages. She's got pretty great sausages herself. I don't know how she'll feel about that. We had Sharon Haugen. We did a podcast with Sharon Haugen. It's coming out soon. And she was talking about sausages on Friday night. There's something about the regulations in pork in Ireland that are different to make our pork better. Okay. Oh, shit. It's the wrong audience, isn't it? No, no. I think it's fine. Don't worry. Oh, no, no, no. Mum says that she doesn't eat. She couldn't possibly have bacon in the fridge but has prosciutto there the whole time.

18:19Don't worry about it. It's fine. We're fine. We're fine. So sausages. Lots of stews. Lots of stews. And we would have, I suppose, like John had a kind of a big Sunday roast and all that kind of vibe. Although that feels like more of a British thing, I think. Like we wouldn't have Yorkshire pud or any of that kind of crack. I don't know what we would have instead just maybe not to be stereotypical but just more potatoes you'd have probably a roast ham would you? lots of ham what's your favourite roast? it's one of those things where it's like what's your favourite music where it's like what mood am I in I don't know sometimes I'll be like I'll want a delicious beef roast but also Dawn does an incredible chicken roast pork belly sometimes I think probably my favourite is a really, really good chicken.

19:15Yeah. I also love, if I'm in a pub, it's a bit controversial, but I love a nut roast. I am with you. I love a nut roast. Because you can't be faff to do it yourself. But when it's done and it's really herby and it's moist and there's good gravy. But how do you make the gravy if you're a good vegetarian? Well, I'm not vegetarian or vegan, so sometimes they'll just give me the meat gravy. Oh, okay. And I do try and eat less meat these days. Sometimes I do have the vegetarian gravy, but I would often, if I'm having a roast, I feel like I've done a good deed with a nut roast. I just slip on the chicken and roll as well.

19:49Have we got any vegans or vegetarians in the audience tonight? Hello, welcome. And I would like to know, what do you do for your sexy gravy? Is it a lot of mushroom, umami stuff? What do you do? Bistos. You what? Yeah, lovely. Pepper sauce. Do you know what, though? Jamie Oliver's vegan Christmas gravy is so delicious and just as delicious or even more delicious than the meat version. You've just got to work at it a bit, haven't you? But Chris's brother and nephew came to us one Christmas. They were both vegan. And so John bought the vegan gravy. And I chose it over my meat gravy that I had worked on for days.

20:37but the vegan gravy was just so lovely who's cooking Christmas dinner this year I'll cook it who's coming our parents both sets yeah we've got a bunch coming this year it's um it's yeah so Chris is my dad and my dad we're going to make them fight we're going to make the parents fight what do they not get on just for our love just to see we feel like after this year we only really have the time for one set. Okay. Okay. So next year you just have one. That's it. It just feels easier. Should we bring on some food now? You know how it is when we do the live podcast it's more picky bits. So we did hear though on a podcast Dawn that you particularly like chips.

21:32I love chips. No sorry not chips. Chris. Sorry. I thought I was in Los Angeles for a moment. Crisps. I love crisps. So it's potato salad. Oh, God, this has followed me around. Well, you're about to get a whole plate. Please bring in the food, guys. That's my girl. Such a hungover moment, standing at the fridge, like, oh, need carbs. Salt and vinegar kettle chips. And there was just some really lovely potato salad in the fridge. So I started loading the potato salad onto the crisps. And I was like, this is spectacular. And I said that on another food podcast. And then on almost every time I've ever talked about food publicly ever, they've been like, is this your favorite food?

22:15And I'm like, sure. I mean, basically it is my favorite food. Well, we took you at your word. We've got some other bits and bobs coming up. But that would not be my hangover go-to, I have to say. Have you tried it? I haven't. I'm a bit funny about anything that's a bit mayonnaise-y. I don't like Russian salad. Keep that away from me. What is your hangover food? What's your hangover food? Marmite. Yeah. Lots of Marmite. Buttery bread. What's the receptacle? Hello, everybody. Oh, hello. Thank you so much. We have... Look at you with your sausage. Also, this is Jo, who helps us out on the podcast.

22:53Hi. And that is producer Alice. It's a family affair here. but it's beautiful. So, yeah, just tuck in. You're dairy-free and you're gluten-free. Yeah, no pressure. But, Dawn, you did say on your Desert Island Dishes that you love the task of having a dietary requirement. I love cooking so much. And I love the challenge of cooking. Sorry, I'm just trying to get an answer here, Mum. That if someone is coming over and I say dietary requirements... So we were doing Thanksgiving two years ago in L.A. when we lived there. We had about 16 people coming over. And there was, you know, I'm gluten-free. We had some dairy-free.

23:32And then there was a gluten-free vegan who doesn't like mushrooms. That's hard. Yeah, that is hard. And so he was being, his girlfriend and him were being very apologetic. And they were like, we'll just bring food. And I'm like, you're not going to bring a lunchbox to my fucking Thanksgiving. I can't. So I will do this. And I took the challenge. And I love the challenge of a dietary requirement. Lenny, do you love the challenge of dietary requirements? I might. My back didn't today. I thought, how do they get on? One's dairy-free and one doesn't have gluten. What are they eating together? Well, I'm actually not really dairy-free.

24:11He's eating Parmesan crisps, of course. I basically just don't, like, if I drink loads of milk, I get itchy. I was never going to get you milk. Yeah, you could have told us that, Chris. You could have told us that. But apparently, like, Parmesan, I think, is okay. Yeah, I don't know if people are funny, but because it's a hard cheese. Is that right? Mum, did you make them parmesan criss? Yeah. Mum, they look amazing. Hold on, did you make them? Yeah, mum. They are gorgeous. No, you just put a teaspoonful on a baking tray and then cook them in the oven for three minutes. That is a good little...

24:45They're delicious. That is a good Christmas... Who's having a Christmas party here? Is anyone... Yeah. I think that would be really good for a party, mum. What, darling? The Parmesan crisps. I know that, darling. I serve it all the time. What's this? That's crab with radicchio. Delicious. Do you know what? I was eating with the microphone here. Are you worried about it? And then I realised. No, babe. I don't know if Jenny is here, but we do give her a shout out. There's a lady that wrote in saying that she loves hearing the mastication. So just do one for Jenny. If you just keep chewing, she'll be really happy.

25:24Hey, can you hear the crabs in my mouth? Hope that turns you on. So after you'd taken her bowling for your first date, did you? No, we never got there. You never got bowling, right. She had other ideas. Okay. When did you get married? must mean a week and a half later i suppose but what a week and a half oh my god three years maybe three years yeah and where did you get married i know on a boat down the road there uh the battersea barge yes that's a little venue yes so we did family and friends on there and did the official thing and then we did a wild and wonderful full shebang in a very illegal venue the next day Oh, I love that.

26:17And who did the catering? Oh, my God, they were wonderful. What were they called? Doesn't matter the name, but what was it? It was pies. Pies? Yeah, we saw it. Three different types of pies that we had. So we had these, like, as a one thing, gorgeous gravy. Yum. Big bowls of potatoes and salads and things. But, yeah, they went round with trays of pies, and you could choose the vegetarian one, chicken and tarragon, or a beef one. Delicious. Gluten-free. No, at the time I was very much ignoring that. There was none of the shit there. None of the shit there. Yeah. Go ahead. The food was amazing. And then because Chris is Irish, I'm from Guernsey, but I was born in Scotland.

26:58So for the reception food we did, in each corner there was a station with food from that place. Oh, how lovely. So we did like little pots of Irish stew, do you remember? And Colcannon. Yeah. Oh, that was so yum. And then we did, I can't remember what the Scottish thing was, but then we did, for Guernsey, there's this kind of bean jar, which is the local, it's like a local bean stew. Little gorgeous little jam jars of that. And then we did something very London as well. So we did a little, and probably an American thing as well. We got married right at the height of mason jars being popular. I think actually we did a lot for mason jars.

27:35We launched them. They were definitely in my Pinterest for my wedding. Yes, we had a lot of striped straws.

27:45Fairy lights. You know the vibe. I'm enjoying this food so much. Are you? Please. Parmesan crisp in the crab. Like crab is my language. We found a new winner. What have we got going over here? Oh, they're little prawns in coriander. And this fella here? What is that? What, darling? Is that smoked salmon? I can't see. Oh, they're smoked salmon. Oh, it's moose. Yeah, I'm not. Quail's eggs. Oh, quail's eggs. Fancy pants. I'm just making sure I chew in for your aroused listener. Yeah. Yeah, do a crunch. Just let's go quiet. Let's listen. Don't go too much. Don't. And we'll ask the audience if anyone else is aroused.

28:21Yeah. Is anyone aroused? Oh, that egg just popped in my mouth. I love a quail's egg. That was for the listener. Are you going to... I thought you were going to do an arousing crunch. I think I did, didn't I? Oh, all right, okay. Okay, hang on now. So, you're a great hope. That was brilliant. You're welcome. So we ask every guest their last supper, but we're going to have to combine yours. Well, we don't have to, but if you both have a very separate one, it's the last supper before you're going somewhere for a very long time. Are they going together, Jess? I don't know. We will. Okay, they're going together.

29:03We will. They come as a pair, I think, keep them together. How is it being married to a very funny man? Is it exhausting?

29:14It's wonderful.

29:18You're funny, but do you feel like you've made each other funnier? Or do you just sit in silence? Do you have to like, I don't know, I want to know. I think we've made each other runnier.

29:33Have we made each other funny? We definitely have. Chris taught me a really great word once. Do you remember it? Do you remember the word you taught me? I taught you so many words. No, the word you taught me about the way we talk to each other. Do you remember that word? Our vernacular. Our vernacular. He taught me the word vernacular, which I just thought was a brilliant word. And we do have a very kind of unique... We do this thing, like, you know how when you're being funny with somebody, you've got a sense of humor with somebody, and then you take it out into the wild, and people are like, what the fuck are you doing?

30:01The one thing we do is we repeat... I found out, place or down, it's a snorter. It's a snorter. We repeat sounds. So if we're sitting in a restaurant and outside a car beeps the horn, we go beep, beep.

30:19And we've started taking quite pride in how close to the sound of the streets we can mimic. That was really good. Good siren.

30:31There's a lot of that. It's like being married to toddlers. It's great. You love a dog bark. I do love a dog bark. Yeah. And I love a car horn. Meep, meep. What a fucking ledge. That was a good one. She can car horn with the best of them. She can, I can hear. I wonder, do you know if he's told a funny story, when you go out, you say, oh, you must tell them that story, that really funny story, and he goes, I've told it about 88 times. Do you do that to him? No, I don't think so. Oh, good. There's never been a moment where she'd wanted me to speak more. I think Chris has got quite a good gauge of, for his own personal entertainment, would start to tell a story that maybe he told multiple times and almost his inner monologue would be, I've heard this a thousand times, can't be bothered.

31:26Like you would stop yourself telling a story because you would want to be entertained by the story as well. I find myself so boring, you know, that I find company important, but also it's like, oh the fucking anecdotes of life like what's the point jesus like pulling my own hair out of my voice i do think there's a difference between being a very funny person and it's so much of your job than being somebody has to write an hour of comedy and stand on stage and deliver and when you come off from doing that and everyone just expects you to be really funny all the time that must be so hard it's like we just want you to be singing constantly you're not allowed to know Are you giving us a song tonight?

32:06As I was saying that, I was like... I'm not going to fucking sing a song tonight, Mum. Stop asking. I would like to hear your voice. Yes.

32:17Guys, it's not going to happen. You could have come to False Idols on Saturday and heard me sing, all right? So back to your last supper. Starter, main, pud, drink of choice. Am I gluten-free in this? You can be whatever you want. I love like a really garlicky, chorizo-y, tomato-y, chilli bake with some sort of melted cheese in the middle and like toasted ciabatta for a starter. Wow. Have you had this somewhere? I cook it. Oh, yeah. Well, I haven't for years, but that would be... I remember we had some people over for dinner once and I cooked that. It was one of the most successful things I've ever cooked.

33:03And just like in a big earthenware pot, just cooked that. Just like three hours of chorizo and tomatoes. And we all just dug in and it could have been the whole night. It was so delicious. But the burps are bad on chorizo. They are bad. Oh, you got some absolute affirmation over there. Hey, burpee. That's the vegans. If you want to ever meet anybody who's belched. They're over there. But, okay, so you're saying because you're gluten-free you wouldn't have the baguette, but you can get kind of... You'd have the baguette for the last supper. Yeah, if it was my last supper, definitely. That sounds delicious.

33:39Yeah, lovely. Okay, so, Chris, would you go for a similar starter, or what are you doing? I was trying to think of the soup that we used to have in this steak restaurant, and I think it might have been an asparagus and fennel soup that you would have sometimes a bit of a callet cleanser before you have a kind of very heavy steak. And I want that. Do you know which restaurant it was at? It was Lassiette. You know that place in Marylebone where they just do steak and they cut it up and give you loads of chips? Oh, that's amazing. There's always a queue. I know, but you can't get in. The queue goes right.

34:21Laundry Cot. No, what's it called? Who knows the place in Marylebone? Yeah, and you have to queue for about half an hour. Come here, you know it. Come here. Just get on the mic, babe. Hi, what's your name? What's your name? Say it in the mic. Catherine. Hi, Catherine. Hi, Catherine. Merry Christmas. I love you too. What is the restaurant you think it's called? Is it called Steak and Frit? No. No, sit down, Catherine. Thanks, Catherine. But that is what they serve, Catherine. That is what they serve. Like, literally, that's all they serve. There isn't a menu. it's just steak and they serve it twice with chips but you're choosing the soup but they do they've got a starter but there's only got one main I think it's called L 'Ontricor that's the one in Marlebone but there was one in LA called La Ciet which is the same idea and they would have a soup and a joke Catherine you were never going to get that it was in LA I fucked it for you I'm so sorry but L 'Ontricor in Marlebone is amazing and it is a queue around the block but you're in and out in 45 minutes so it's always worth queuing because you will get in yeah but it's a two hour queue I tried once.

35:26This is really that busy. But do you know what they do? They give you dinner. And then they give it to you again. No, but then they give it to you again. You're only allowed two helpings. But they're just doing you the whole thing again. It's really young. So we've got the soup. What drink are we going for? Or are you having any sides with your soup? I would probably have a little bit of bread. something something like either a porridge bread or a soda bread a porridge bread yeah I love a porridge bread never had it oh very easy to make as well no kneading no kneading no it's actually just natural yogurt and porridge and you stick it all in together and a little bit of seasoning yeah it's so eat.

36:19That's it. That's it? Maybe a bit of seasoning, a bit of... Porridge and yoghurt and you bake it? Yeah, and you stir it up in a pot, a little bit of in the actual yoghurt pot and then you put it into your bacon tray grease it a little bit How does it rise? You've got a little bit of baking powder in there but what do you touch? Okay, a baking powder. And it doesn't rise much Okay, so drinks what are we going for? I hear that you don't drink wine anymore. I had to really cut down on wine. Is this what's, I'm now 40, you said it's a thing that happens when you're 40. It's really annoying because I love red wine more than I love my own children.

37:00But it just started to do, I would just get so drunk, like head floppy drunk, which I don't really want to be. Don't sleep. And then the hangover is just days and days and days. So I was like, I think I have to give up drinking, which for me is really very hard. it's the only thing keeping the marriage together and then my sister said I'm just going to get you another tea another green tea thanks and then my sister said it's just wine just stop drinking wine and so I did I stopped drinking wine for like 8 months and realised that I can drink an awful lot of Prosecco and I can drink an awful lot of tequila but yesterday at my terrible Sunday lunch because it was so sad I had a really delicious glass of red wine so I just treat myself like middle of the day but I used to drink it all night.

37:46I just can't do that anymore. Dawn is basically on the motherland diet. What's the motherland? Prosecco and spag bol. Spag bol. Well, without the gluten though. Without the gluten. Spag. Prosecco and spag. Yeah. I do like, you know, I eat a lot of pasta but it's all gluten free. But the, so red wine I love but you asked what the drink be. I'm like, love, I love margaritas. Do you like a spicy mug? I love a margarita. Spicy mug but just love a classic on the rocks with salt. That is the perfect drink. We've been living in LA for a long time. I bet you've got some good margaritas out there. Tequila and lime is the, you know, immediately thinking back to us into the pandemic, being like, we have to at least get till noon.

38:28Yeah. Before we're allowed our lime smoothie. But just that taste goes with tacos. That's such a part of the life out there, isn't it? Oh, yeah. Just that lime flavour. Love it. When did you move back? Last year, last summer-ish time. Is it feeling good? Is it permanently here now? I think so, yeah. Well, you know, while the kids are at school, I think, probably. But, you know, I think with the job that Chris does and the life that we live and the kind of people that we are, I don't think you could ever say ever on, never say, you know, forever on anything, but it does feel like a bit of a came-home vibe.

39:13Can I... Well, I want to talk about Choose Love in a bit. I'm just going to get your last supper, and then we can talk about how you got involved with Choose Love. Oh, I've got to tell you my drink. Yeah, I'd like to hear it. So this is the first drink of the evening. You're not sharing margaritas. Well, we could. Chris makes a stunning margarita. I love a margarita. I can only have a couple of them, though. I find them, after a while, they're a bit too limey. Uh-huh. But a martini. Oh, yeah. What's your martini? Gin martini extra dirty. That's justy. But I can't do the gin. Oh, really? I don't actually like it in anything other than that and the G &T.

39:51Delicious. What else is there? What else is there? Oh, it's like, oh, no, you don't like a gin? I love a G &T, but I just... Well, anyway, that sounds amazing. Do you make a good gin martini? Filthy. Well, maybe I don't. But I was a cocktail barman for a short time, so I put some energy into it. Did you ever call yourself a mixologist? Chris would walk into the kitchen, pick up a bottle of wine, throw it into the air and spin it six times while I have a panic attack and catch it every single time. Like Tom Cruise. She doesn't love it when I do that. Why? It terrifies me. Because I'm like, he'll go, ha ha, walk off.

40:28And the children are standing just underneath, yeah. Daddy, do it again. Can we get your main, please? Oh, my God. You go, do you have something to... Oh, if I was going to... This is Lassaper. would probably do an Irish stew Irish lamb stew that's been marinated for hours and hours maybe a couple of days in it maybe it's somebody's wake maybe they died before their time we don't know maybe it was at the hand of their greatest enemy but anyway it's been marinating and with some buttery spuds and that or like a stroganoff dish, something in that world, beef stew. You love a goulash? Love a goulash.

41:18Can you cook a goulash? No, I've actually never tried to cook a goulash. I should, shouldn't I? Yeah, you should. It's just paprika, isn't it? Yeah, and a bit of cream. Not in a goulash, that's stroganoff, isn't it? It's paprika. Paprika, it's Hungarian, isn't it? and I have some Hungarian, because I was working with a Hungarian lady and she says, oh, I've got the best paprika. I'm like, well, I'm not going to challenge you. And you brought it home and it was absolutely lovely. Yes, gorgeous. It makes a big difference, I'm sure. It's one of those things where it's a delicacy somewhere else and we don't really think about it.

41:50Yeah, absolutely. Can I get your main, please? Because that was your starter, the chorizo was the starter. Yeah, so it's all... But I really do love fish. and I love fish in butter and garlic and capers and black olives and all the salty deliciousness. So I think my main would be some kind of crispy skin fish with a butter, caper, black olive sauce on buttery squashed potatoes. Just boiled but squashed with lots of butter in and then a garlicky side salad is just the perfect meal. Tell me about your vinaigrette that you make. So I've done the same vinaigrette for years. And my friends in America would always be like, what is this?

42:35Because everything over there is full of mayonnaise or full of sugar. Like the dressings are really, they're real cocktails. And I think the most simple dressing is the best. So I've always done what my auntie did. Just really good quality olive oil, balsamic vinegar, a little pinch of mustard powder and a crushed clove of garlic and salt and pepper. and that just on green leaves is just so delicious and my friends were always like what's in this dressing what's in this dressing but it was just that kind of unbottled unpreserved raw garlic flavor some people it's not for them but for me that that's what i love if garlic's gone through any kind of bottling or process or pickling or sitting for too long i like it when it's raw so you won't make a vat of it and put it in the fridge i used to and then i realized that I actually just, I prefer making it there and then.

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44:30Can we talk about, are you ever going to make documentary? Are you going to do documentaries again? I don't think so. I love that I did them. You were like, you know, we adore Stacey. You were like the original. Thank you. I feel like it needs to be acknowledged. Well, that's really nice. I do, and I do. I feel like now, I felt at the time that I was doing something that nobody else was doing. Yeah. I felt at the time like I was doing something that nobody else was doing. So that definitely does take the fun away from doing it again a bit. So the hours are so long and it takes you, I love sitting at my desk, I love writing my books so much and I love being able to do a nine to five at my desk.

45:11Yeah. And so if I do TV again in that way, it just takes me away from that. Would you ever do fiction? I do fiction. No, I mean telly-wise. No, I know you do fiction. I am the world's worst. I had a small cameo in Skins and I thought I was going to be so great that they'd be like, oh my God, Dawn is so talented. Just get her on. And I was so awkward. I was so stiff and so terrible. I was like, no, that is not, that was, thank God I didn't want to do that. Maybe you just didn't have the right director. Chris does not give me even the smallest part in one of his shows, which I think is very mean Chris you're right.

45:56I don't think so You could get to do the sirens I've I've been lucky enough for For the last 15 years to have dawn read with me or while I was preparing for auditions and it's the real insight into the voices that a person can do. I do the accents that are in the script. I'll be like, John, in this one, you're an FBI agent. It's a big mistake telling her that. She rolls into the room. Has it ever led to more intimate times like cosplay? Not as much as you would like. No? Okay, Chris, it's time to go upstairs. He's like... There it is. No, it's not. But, John, did you go... What did you do when you left school?

46:47Did you go to university? Well, I went to drama school and did three years of acting. You went to drama school. Oh, right. So you were trained. In the third year, I realised... I just... This isn't where my heart is. So I... Instead of doing a play, everyone was being marked on a play as their final project, I came down to London and I worked as a runner on the Bedilla Skinner show. And I got... So Avalon Productions marked me for my final thing instead of doing a play. So just kind of, that was the right thing to do. And then, you know, I left university and came down to London and worked behind the scenes in TV for a really long time.

47:21And it was, I worked out it wasn't what I was going to do before I failed miserably at it. Thank God. Did you go to drama school? Yes. Which seems shocking. But I did. I went to Lambda here in London. okay and I had gone I'd been doing a degree in politics and enjoyed that but while I was there I was running that the National Student Drama Festival became obsessed just with student theater and then was doing lots of theater above pubs and things like that and then came here to drama school and that was yeah 25 years ago and I kind of started there what was in your fridge when you were at drama school?

48:06Oh man, there was just a lot of past-in cheese. Honestly, it was poor. Didn't you say that you ate multiple fry-ups a day? Oh, at drama school, we had a place on the way to work or on the way to fucking school. Just a builder's cafe, really. So we would have a builder's breakfast and it was so cheap that I would have it twice. Of course. It had a net negative nutritional value. But you love breakfast, don't you? Breakfast's my favourite meal quite easily. Loves it. Absolutely, me too. That's why the fasting thing does not work for me. Right. Because I will have the breakfast at 12, but it's just like, it's what I want.

48:47Yeah. What did you have to break you this morning? Where was I this morning? Oh, we were in Weymouth. You were there this morning. Yeah, I was there this morning, so we had a bacon bap. but in a perfect world I want, I'm not hungry immediately when I wake up so I'll have some coffee maybe a smoothie if I can be arsed to make one and then at around maybe I'll do the school run walk the dogs and then at around like 10 I'll maybe be hungry and then I'll want definitely some lovely eggs maybe a bit of avocado but lovely bacon I just love the idea of you calling it avocado. That's it. But just I loved it in America as well and Mexican breakfasts I really kind of miss.

49:38A bit of spice in the morning is really nice. Do you do a breakfast burrito? Do you do any Mexican here when you're at home? If so, which taco are you going to go for? Well, I'll have an al pastor or a carnitas. I haven't found the right places where we are yet. I don't know if London is necessarily a hot spot for great Mexican food so long away the Mexican food there is so incredible it really is isn't it whenever I make them at home there's a thousand toppings and actually when you go for a really good taco there's like three toppings they've just done it really well it's delicious we do miss that culture of just popping out huevos rancheros you could make that Yeah, it's probably not that tricky.

50:27I've never tried huevos pancheras. What's your pudding? Have you got sweet teeth? You do. I don't. I really don't eat pudding. If I make pudding, if we're having people over, I make an avocado chocolate mousse. Why? My version of a Jamie Oliver recipe. You would not know it was avocado. Oh, because of the dairy tree? No, but not even that. It's just delicious. Really? It is good, isn't it? Oh, your mousse. Oh, it's so good. the avocado just does what butter would do the kids think it's absolutely lovely and it's so decadent and it's so lovely and there's no butter, sugar or cream in it I'll put it on Instagram tomorrow and you will love it it takes 30 seconds I'm going to try making it

51:16it's got loads of coconut cream in it and maple syrup we're not idiots, it's delicious but I'm sure if I was to make your dream pudding it wouldn't be that no it wouldn't be mine either it is really good though I'm not joking it's absolutely delicious what would yours be? I love a sticky toffee in a perfect world what do you call it New York cheesecake with something nice on top that kind of world I think and what drink are you going for around the mains and the pud Well, for pud, those are two different questions. But for pud, I'd probably have a Petey whiskey, a Petey West of Ireland whiskey.

52:01And then for the main course, probably a red wine. Was I having a Bistu? Yeah, you were. I'd have a Rijakka probably. Uh-huh. Lovely. I'd see how we feel after that. Absolutely. I do love an Amaretto. Oh, I used to drink that a lot when I was 16. In a restaurant, so I don't really eat puddings. So if I'm in a restaurant very rarely would order dessert But do you love getting double amaretto with one ice cube? Oh That's good. That's good shit. Yeah, gotcha. We used to drink a lot of amaretto didn't we back in the day? That was a real thing wasn't it? Oh, I couldn't keep an almond liquor out of your mouth back in those days Do you do you like Bailey's do I like which which Bailey's Love a bit of Christmas Me too.

52:47When do you get your first bottle? Around 7am maybe. No. Which, have you already started on the Baileys? It's the beginning of December. Yeah, it's around now, isn't it? Yeah. I started, yeah. It's around now when you're like, what kind of milk do you want? Maybe a Sunday, like after breakfast, something. Oh, not after breakfast. No. No, because I love to put a little bit in the coffee. Of course you do. Which is nice. Yeah. Because I don't do the dairy as much, I got the almond one. You know? The almond bailey? Yeah. The almond bailey. Shut up. It's all right. You're kidding me. No, and it's grand.

53:21Yeah, it's not as good, but it's fine. It's not fucking insane, but they've done their best, and I'm proud of them. Who's going to get a baileys when they go to halftime? Anyone tickled? Are you going to get one? I fancy one now. And whilst you're there, you're also going to buy some merch and some Choose Love goodies, maybe, please. Which brings me on to how you got involved with Choose Love. well how did I get involved well it was a boozy Sunday lunch with myself and Josie Norton who is now our CEO 10 years ago my baby was there Art was three months old I think and we were just talking at this lunch going are you watching what's going on with this camping calais why why isn't everyone in uproar why isn't everyone trying to do something and so we said let's just send a coach a truckload of supplies so the next day through um our twitter feeds would anybody like to send something we'll get it to calais and we got 7 000 packages in 24 hours delivered to this big yellow storage they'd given us a room and then they had to donate us a floor i remember at one point we were trying to get people to come and help organize everything because there was just so much and i remember just looking down it was just Tamsin Althwaite.

54:37I was like, you angel. She just comes to like organize parcels. And you realize that it was just at this time where everyone's kind of seeing this thing on the news, feeling utterly helpless. And what we did is we just said, we can help you help. Like we've got an idea. But then all this stuff came. We're like, God, we've got to get it there. We don't know how to get it there. And then we were donated a fleet of lorries. And suddenly one day we're just waving off all these lorries with all of these supplies and they went to calais and they got taken there and then the team got to calais and realized we can't just get here and dump stuff and so the next thing was we need a warehouse to organize everything to do all this and suddenly this this machine is being created now we were just a bunch of maverick friends trying to do a nice thing and we all had other jobs and um and that was the beginning of choose love we were called help refugees and 10 years later we've raised 120 million pounds wow yeah incredible um it's it's incredible and the money that you've raised tonight i think i think we're around 25 grand tonight i think maybe we are and so that is so amazing thank you so much i cannot tell you how amazing that is that money will go directly to the cause and we exist because of our mainly because of our public crowdfunding and how much people support us so we've got our christmas shop this year on region street right next to the apple store which is amazing it's amazing you go in and you buy whatever you want whatever you're passionate about for somebody's somebody else's journey and we'll get it to them and every year there's certain types at times over the year when it just feels like such hard work and it's so despondent oh my god how this is just so hard does anybody care is there anyone out there and every year we look at what you guys have raised and what people turn up to the shop and actually say what can i do how much can i give and it's always so incredible um i think choose love is a movement not just a charity and you're all part of it and thank you so much

56:53i really don't want to now bring it back to food because that was a beautiful way to That was amazing. Thank you Dawn. Before we go to a break and you now go to the merch stand and you think about maybe, honestly it can be £1 that you donate extra tonight and we do so appreciate that you've already bought tickets but if you fancy giving a little bit more you are very welcome or if you fancy going to the Regent Street shop, it's such a vibe. There's usually a DJ in there Mum's on the tills Dawn will be on the tills, Chris is probably on the tills Chris is the best person on the tills at the choose-a-love shop you've ever seen.

57:26Actually, you don't. You stand outside with a placard. People find me quite intimidating to say no to. Literally drags people in every year. It's brilliant. Good crack, yeah. It is really good crack. It's amazing, and it is an amazing charity. It's refugee help in 41 different countries around the world. Some places, this is the only help that people are getting. Pulling people out of the water, getting people into warm clothes, helping families when they land in new places with legal care and home care and all of the things that you don't necessarily think about. It's beautiful what Alana and Josie and Dawn and all of this incredible group of mostly women have kind of done.

58:04It's remarkable. And we thank you for being here tonight. It's an absolute honour to talk about Choose A Love as well. It makes sense why you changed it from Help Refugees to Choose Love because it is the most loving movement. There is so much love and there's so much ambition for this charity and it's completely selfless. I mean, it's beautiful what you've created. and the merch is great and it looks really good on kids too so you can get little small sizes maybe there or you can get it in the shop now back to the table manners uh podcast we need to um just round it up with you both giving us your nostalgic taste or smell i think i'm garlic garlic yeah i think i think i'm just garlic i buttery you know when someone goes oh I'm sorry about my garlic breath I'm like I love the smell of garlic on someone's breath, I just want to go what did you eat was it amazing no, do you love it as much we haven't been that close in a while that she would smell it but garlic is I just think the best like cooking garlic is the best smell on the planet I'm very into garlic but that smell a few hours later or even the day after So it's the day after I can't do.

59:19I can't do it, Dawn. I don't mind it at all. I also think, and you might correct me on this, but I've eaten so much raw garlic that I think my body has quite a high tolerance. I don't think it lingers on me for the next day. Maybe it does. I just don't smell it. You're actually not called Cat Lady or called Garlic Lady. Garlic Lady, that's the next book. But I'm just never offended by someone's garlic breath. I want to know what it was they ate and how delicious it was. Does anyone ever tell you, Dawn, you actually smell of garlic? Do you want to mint? No, probably because I'm talking over them, telling them about what I ate.

59:57Chris, what's your nostalgic taste? Rhubarb crumble. Grandad grew a lot of rhubarb in the back garden, and so we'd have rhubarb crumbles for quite a few months. It's mostly sugar, of course, but you could get that real hard, sharp-hitter rhubarb to you with the back of your throat and it'll bring you through childhood. Did you ever put ginger with it? Say that again. Did your mum ever put ginger with your rubik? Do you know what? I don't know if we ever did. I've had it since. I don't know if we did in my childhood. I won't have that. I don't even know the conditions where ginger grows, if I'm totally honest with you.

1:00:32You might just use the powdered one. Oh, the powdered one, sure. But that's not in granddad's garden. Okay, no, obviously not. Just let him go with his beautiful, nostalgic taste. And would you be with custard or cream? Custard, yeah, custard. Lovely. And a bit of cream, maybe a bit of ice cream, depending on how good we've been. A little bit of garlic on top. Oh. No one will ever smell it. Do you guys like karaoke? Well, very much. Are you offering some kind of situation? No, Jessie hates it. I think it's great fun. But is it because it's you? Everyone's expecting too much? No, I love other people doing it.

1:01:21I just don't like doing it. And I have really bad PTSD from my mum making me do it at Club Med. Oh, interesting. See, I've been practising one of your songs for karaoke. Shut up. Hello, love. Oh, that's a nice one. Oh, trust me. Have you? Yeah, I love it. Oh, that's nice. I don't know if it's on there yet, though, babe. I don't know. I might have to find it on YouTube and just drown you out. Yeah, drown me out with your garlic breath. I love this already. yeah no mum made me do it at Club Med and I think I've said this in the podcast already but she I was 15 it was Turkey it was October half term and it was a really chilly night but karaoke was happening and she went you want to be a singer you better get up on that stage and sing what did you sing what did you sing I want to dance with somebody she'll do Whitney Whitney.

1:02:13She'll do Whitney. Do it now, Jen. No, fuck off. Tell me a fucking joke, Chris. I mean, I'll sing it. Paddy Englishman, Paddy Irishman, Paddy Scotsman are in a pub with their sons. Oh, fuck off. You're playing them. I'm not singing. I'm not singing. And Paddy Englishman says, I called my son George because he was born on St. George's Day. And then Paddy Scotsman says, this is my son Andrew and he was born at St. Andrew's Day and Paddy Irishman leans into his son and he says, say nothing pancake

1:02:59Chris O'Donnell and Dono Porter everybody

1:03:20Well Mum, well, I'm slightly in love with the man with the Irish accent. Well I'm in love with Dawn. I love both of them. You have Chris and I'll have Dawn. Okay. What fabulous guys. They were amazing, absolutely amazing. Great fun. Do you want to just tell the crowd what a lady just said to you? she said Lenny why doesn't Jessie let you speak more during podcasts and I said because she's a little jealous because I'm really the star exactly that I'm really sorry that I don't let her speak more what a great night it was really gorgeous um people got really involved we made a lot of money for Choose Love if you would like to donate to Choose Love or visit the store in Regent Street this Christmas period um please do we will put links to Choose Love in our Instagram stories and in the show notes.

1:04:16Can you buy online? You can buy online. And you can spend whatever you want. It's like as little as much as you want and everything counts and they so appreciate it. But thank you so much for listening and we hope you enjoyed the live podcast. Maybe we'll go on tour again. I don't know. Would you like to go on tour? Maybe. Maybe. The way those people were flocking to you, Lily. Flocked towards me, darling. With your chicken soup. The chicken soup, really. No. It was for a moment. I think it was for the chicken soup. But there you go. Thank you so much and we'll see you next week.

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