Second Helpings - Noel Gallagher

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1:05Hello and welcome to Table Manners Second Helpings. Well darling, I think hell has frozen over. Why do you think so, Lellie? Well, we had a guest on and I said, are you going to make friends with our kid? Will you ever perform together again? And he said it would have to be an extraordinary series of events for this to happen. Well, it has. It could be the fact that he has a very expensive divorce or that his family has encouraged them to make amends. Yeah, please his mum. But Oasis are going on tour, reuniting. And we had Noel Gallagher on the podcast. And we can't wait for the reunion. We can't.

1:52I've got friends who are still 150 ,000th in the queue, Sophie Lee. she'd sent me a picture said I'm 150 ,000th in the queue the one thing I would say I think I'd rather get in at the Cardiff concert than wait to see if they carry on their reconciliation where they carry on to the heat and bark I loved this episode with Noel I don't know why I loved it so much because he'd already had breakfast when he turned up I'd made some really nice eggs with asparagus and he'd already eaten he also brought his own tea bags because he didn't think that I would have Yorkshire tea in my house well ye of little faith noel gallagher i did we had a gorgeous morning he was so funny he wasn't as scary i thought i was a bit scared to meet him and he wasn't half as scary as i thought he was going to be brilliant he came on to talk about his um new album with high flying birds which was called council skies and the funny thing that he did talk about in this episode was saying that he wasn't a big fan of stadiums and arenas oh well well i'm so sorry i'm so sorry Noel Gallagher you're gonna have to be doing a lot of them because you've sold out the whole tour it's going to be the one concert that everyone is going to I think will it be bigger than Taylor Swift I think so yeah I think so too it's a huge cultural event well it might be older people than at Taylor Swift I'm so excited but also I really enjoyed this episode and I thought he was brilliant he was very candid he was an open book he is funny he's really funny He's great fun.

3:23You two went head to head. Yeah. Both Manx, darling. And if he does need me to warm up the crowd for that audience participation. Oh, you're there. You know, well, no, I'm not there. You see, darling, if you supported City, not United, you'd have got the gig. Yeah, imagine me with my disco and my whips before the Oasis. I think they'd be like, what is going on? Yeah, yeah. But you know what, Noel? I'm here if you need me. So this is Table Manor's Second Helpings with Noel Gallagher.

4:09Noel Gallagher, thank you very much for being here. You've come and we've got you a goat's milk, Yorkshire tea, gold. Don't judge me. I am a bit goat's milk. I've kept my accent, but I've jettisoned my drinking, my milk habits. And you drink Yorkshire tea? Yorkshire, yeah. I can't drink anything else, but I've been to thousands of those things on tour with me. Do you? Bingbug's full of it, yeah. Why do you like goat's milk, darling? It just happened to be in the fridge once, and my ex-wife was drinking it, and I kind of thought, oh, that's all right. When my kids said, why do you drink goat's milk?

4:41And I said, because I'm the greatest of all time. Oh, that's very good. And I said, only the best can drink it. And they were like, what, is that actually? And I was like, yeah, actually. It's only me and Lionel Messi drink it. David Bowie drank it. And John Lennon, I believe. Oh, so you are. No, you're not. Oh, you're teasing. I'm listening gullibly, thinking, yeah, I can rely on this Manchester person to tell the truth. Your accent's coming back all of a sudden. He knows Cheatham Hill, Jess. Of course he fucking does. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She does that thing where she says I'm from Manchester and then says she's from Salford, which is actually not in Manchester.

5:21It's next to... So my bit is off Leicester. Do you know Leicester Road? I do, I know. Right, so I'm at the top of Leicester. Well, that's where my mum used to live. All right. So what brought you down these neck of the woods? Love. It wasn't love at all. I went to university in Birmingham. All right. And then everyone wanted to come to London. I guess, yeah. And I did social work and I got a job here. All right. So I went to Manchester High. Me too. Which one did you go to? I was high. Very good. I went to Manchester High all the time, actually. I've still got friends in Manchester. And I love Manchester.

6:00Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love going back to see my mum. Where's your mum living? She still lives in the St Cow's house. Does she? Yeah, yeah. She lives in a place called Burnage, which is right in the south side. Oh, it's Carshish Burnage. No, it was. Was it? It was, yeah. Did you go to Burnage School? No, no, no. I went to a school called St Mark's in Didsbury. I was originally born in Longsite. Yeah. That's where Longsite Market is. And then they knocked our houses down to build this new fangled thing called a super, it's called a hypermarket, and it was the new Asda's. And we got moved to this posh part of town, which was called Burnage.

6:35Burnage. And I can assure you it's not posh anymore. And I went to a place called St Mark's in Didsbury. Are you Catholic? Yeah, for my sins. Is that why you went to St. Mark's rather than Burnage? Well, I went to St. Mark's because my parents suggested I might want to go there. Okay. Yeah, I didn't go because I'm a firm believer in Jesus Christ. Was it strict? Catholic schools in the 70s, well... Good education, though. They weren't as brutal as probably the 50s, but it was an all-boys school, and there was like hundreds in each class. so I didn't I bunked off school for three months and nobody noticed and my school was that big that my mum was actually one of the head dinner ladies and she didn't even notice and I used to I used to go in just to have dinner what were you doing when you were bunking off?

7:28glue sniffing doing magic mushrooms how old were you? I would have been 13, 14 and then when she finally got the letter And they said to her, we haven't seen Noel for three months. And she went, well, I've seen him every day. She said, well, he can't be with Noel for three months. And I would just go in for dinner. That was clever, though. I still think she never really forgave me for that until I appeared on Top of the Pops. And then she was like, OK, fair enough. But were you off playing a guitar at 30? No. No, I was getting drunk. Just listening, actually listening to a lot of music. So, yeah.

8:05What was great on Glue? to listen to anything.

8:12These are the hard-hitting questions. What music is great on glue? Lasagna's coming up. Funnily enough, I've got a glue playlist that I've made up before I came here. Glue is not or wasn't conducive to listening to music. But what was great on glue was that you would hallucinate rather vividly. did you ever write a song about it? about glue sniffing no no no some of the punks did back to food and the dinner and actual food was the food good at St Mark's? standard you know standard school food I'm not sure school food these days you went in every day or was that just to make sure your mum didn't get in?

9:00yeah I wasn't going in because the food was great okay fine I was going in because I was trying to keep the subterfuge going. But, yeah, standard school food, like everything with chips. It wasn't as healthy as these things are now. My kids go to school and there's vegan options and vegetarian this and gluten-free that. And I sometimes feel a bit sorry for them. They just want steak, kidney pie and chips, mashed potatoes and, you know, apple crumble. But it's all got a bit posh these days, hasn't it? There's a big Catholic school opposite Heaton Park, isn't there? There is. Have you ever played at Heaton Park?

9:38Yes, I have. I actually went to see the Pope there when he came. Did you go? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like a massive, great big deal. Yeah, everyone went. Yeah, everyone in Manchester. But it's like the only celebrity that I've ever been. But is that where the Stone Rose did? They're big. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. So Heaton Park. Did Oasis ever play there? We did. Yeah, they have a festival on that. I think I might be playing there this year. Not Parkland. Is it called Park Life? No, you wouldn't do Park Life. It's quite dancey. They have these festivals on there and I've played it as a solo artist.

10:12I know Aces played a few nights there. You were doing Withenshaw. Withenshaw Park. This August. I didn't even know they had gigs at Withenshaw Park. They don't. This is the first one. Really? This is the inaugural one. That's amazing. They're going to do it now as an annual thing. Why don't you play at the City Stadium? Because I'm not popular enough. Oh, bollocks. All the city supporters would go. Just get other people with too. Get Harland on base. Well, you would hope that they would, but I'm not willing to take that risk, and neither am I promoters. No, I'm not. My High Flying Birds thing is not stadium friendly.

10:52Arenas is my kind of level, and I don't even like doing arenas. I love that. Arenas. Arenas is my level, sure. I'm just trying to get out of academies Jesse you want to do an arena I don't know do you like arenas no I don't like them I prefer theatres there's more of a vibe I think when you're playing arenas or this is what I think anyway I've been tough on myself every time I go to see someone in an arena they've got this this larger than life thing where they interact with the crowd I've literally got nothing to say apart from the music so I'm better if I'm in a I think you have. Well, things like this, yeah, but not in between songs.

11:32I can't even bother asking everybody how they're doing. I'm like Richie Lennon. Are you doing? Some guy in the front going, actually, I'm not too well at the minute. I know that the audience participation thing has yet to reach me. I think I'd like to let the music do the talking. You need a gay crowd like Jessie. Actually, they've limited how much I can speak because I was speaking too much. It was becoming like a chat show. So they've actually limited it to that. inside of the stage doing this. No, I just like, the songs go into each one. So we make it more like a dance set because otherwise I'd be like, what's your name?

12:04Where'd you come from? Yeah. So it's a bit of a problem. Well, that's how Billy Connolly became a comedian because he was in a band with the guy that wrote Baker Street, you know, that famous song. Oh, Jay Rafferty. Jay Rafferty. And they were a folk duo and Billy Connolly used to do the in-between song pattern and used to tell these stories. And at one point, the stories got so long that Jay Rafferty said, you know, I think you want to do your own thing from now on. It was kind of like, you were doing like one song and 20 minutes of a funny story from Billy Connolly and that's how we got to be a stand-up comedian.

12:33Maybe we should go on tour together. Maybe I should do the music and you should do the chit-chatting. Yeah, I know. Well, let's take it back to the beginning. When your mum wasn't doing Dinner Lady duty, what was she cooking at home and what's a really memorable dish from your childhood? Well, I come from a very Irish family. Is your mum Irish? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But does she speak with an Irish accent? Oh, good Lord, yes. Oh, so she's proper Irish. Oh, yeah. She's as Irish as they come, yeah. She is insane. So she's from a family of 11, and she's got the seven girls, and five of the seven all moved to Manchester at the same time.

13:11They all live in the same council estate within walking distance from each other. And, of course, being Irish, they all had about 14 kids each. So it was a big kind of Irish family. So it was all Irish cooking, which is like stews, and, you know, I never had a boiled egg since I was 31. Did you like... That's a true story. No. I said it was on my 30th birthday. Someone said, you should try something you've never tried before on my 30th birthday. And I was like, I've never had a boiled egg. And I had boiled egg and soldiers and I've now eaten eggs. Do you love them? Yeah, I love them. Particularly at that point a few years ago when they said, you know what, they don't actually give you cholesterol.

13:48And you're like, right, crack on with the fucking eggs then. I eat eggs every day. two eggs and two slices of bread. You already had eggs then? I have, yeah. But for God's sake, well, okay, you can have another one. Jesse, you probably didn't fancy what you were cooking and he thought you'd better eat first, I told you. I gave you three options. Did you not get the... So it didn't come to me, I'm afraid, no. Well, don't worry, you've got the lightest option, which is lucky, or you can have a slice of cake. Well, what are the options? Well, no, now there isn't one option. There's only one option.

14:16I went ahead and decided. Yeah, that was... Why did you give three options and then made the decision? Because it's Noel Gallagher, and I was like... OK. I felt like he'd have an opinion on these kind of things. She'd wait till you'd chosen it. Because she didn't. Only the goats get here. I don't want to start a family feud here. This is just Noel. I want to know which part of Ireland was your mum from? She's from a place called County Mayo, which is on the west side. Yeah, yeah, it's the Wild West. Did you like her cooking? Growing up, you have nothing to judge it against, because it's just when people cook for you.

14:47Do you know what I mean? I'm not a big... Even to this day, I'm in my mid-50s now, and I like nice food and all that, but I'm not a foodie, do you know what I mean? I won't go, oh my God, that was an amazing piece of salmon. You know what I mean? Food is still a function for me. You're hungry, you eat, you crack on with what you're doing. But I do like going to nice restaurants, but mum's cooking, you can't judge it against anything else. Do you know what I mean? So when Oasis were really getting big and you were probably being spoiled with the riches of the best restaurants. Was that something that you got a bit excited about?

15:25Were you like, no, no? No, because we got big quite quickly. It kind of blew up quite quickly. We were still the same kind of five guys that had been in the rehearsal room the year before. So we were still hanging out in pubs and we weren't the healthiest or the most sophisticated bunch. you know I didn't have I didn't have sushi until I moved to London I was like what raw fish alright so what's that all about that looks like the inside of a bicycle tyre it's like no it's octopus but yeah I've never been I've never been that hugely funnily enough I'm not foodie at all but I do like watching Masterchef me too are you watching it this week I've got it on series link at home Do you like the amateur or do you like the professionals?

16:14Do you watch both? Well, I watch it. It's the same reason that I used to love watching Top Gear. I can't drive. I've never had a driving lesson. I'm not, it's not something. You're joking. I actually, I heard you talking on Zoe Ball about your driving lessons, which was just so hysterical. Well, I've only ever had one. And the woman was driving around a housing estate in Slough with a Nissan Micah with a big white triangle on the top with a big letter L. And I was thinking, I can't wait. it's easier past this to get a massive fucking Rolls Royce or something and she said can you just pull over here please and I pulled over onto the kerb and she just unclicked her seatbelt and said I'll be back in a minute and she walked into this house and came back out with her mum because her mum wanted to meet me oh my god that's so unprofessional and at that point the slough comprehensive the bell went for kicking out time and all these kids were kind of looking at me sat in this car like an idiot and then I drove the car back to my house and I was like, okay, well I won't be doing that again That must have been an awkward drive home But anyway, it never stopped me loving Top Gear, which I thought was a great TV programme, and I used to love it and I love looking at cars and I think they're amazing, and it's the same with food I enjoy watching amateurs make it and it's the kind of thing, you know, when you see these people and they're like, they're really cooked, you know what I mean and I'm thinking I mean, I can, because I live on my own I can cook for myself, right What would you cook?

17:39What would you cook? Oh, standard chicken, meat, anything you can put in an agar. A roast chicken? I can do that, yeah, easy. Are agars a pain in the arse, are they actually quite easy? For me, they're quite easy. Okay. Is your kitchen always hot then? Yes, it is. I don't mind it warm, I like it warm. Everyone that comes to mind. What colour is your agar? Black. Black. And it is always on, yeah, and it does make the kitchen quite hot, but I like that. But I can, I wouldn't, I wouldn't cook for anybody else for fear that I'd poison them, like food poisoning. So I'm good at cooking for me, but anyone else, I'm like, well, they're going to have to get delivery.

18:17I can do pasta. Yeah, I can do pasta. So if we were coming round, you'd just be guys for our order? Well, I live in the countryside at the minute, so we'd be going to the King George, the local pub, yeah, which is not bad. Is it? What's your order there? Fish and chips. Speaking of fish and chips, now because and you know this anyway but Felix White is Felix White who from the Maccabees the biggest Noel Gallagher fan in the world and I had to call him yesterday and I went to school with him and I I watched him I don't know if I've told you this before but I've watched him and Jack Pignate perform Oasis in the talent show when we were in like year year 10 and they dressed up and he was Liam, Jack was Noel and he adores you but you know this but he has some food related questions because I was like listen we've got the goat coming and he said okay this is the shit that I need to know fish and chips, Zabaletta did you say something about respecting Zabaletta for having a fish and chips every Friday?

19:33yeah so there's this football player he's from he's from Argentina he used to play for City and he used to he lived in Didsbury I believe and he used to go to the same chippy every Friday and get fish and chips and queue up with the with the natives and it's like you know what spread that dude for that have you ever been to Argentina I went recently it's the most amazing country on the planet I know it's gorgeous you say this to people and they go really and I'm like I'm telling you the people the food the people the vibe I love it the best gigs you will ever do ever is in Argentina I don't know Sao Paulo was pretty amazing for me Mexico City yeah for me I've been going to I first went to Argentina when I was a roadie for a band in the 80s I first went in 1988 and it was amazing then and Oasis used to do the craziest gigs there in football stadiums like the maddest things you'd ever see in your life and they jump Yeah, and they go, bananas.

20:35But it's the most amazing country, I've got to say. The food. Yeah, vegetarians don't get on too well over there, fortunately. No. But they cook their steak a bit too much. No, you just have to order it a bit less done. Jessie, but when you say that to them, they think you're slightly odd not having well-done steak. I absolutely love that. Do you like your steak well done? If I'm cooking it at home, I'll do it for four and a half minutes. That's quite rare. It's medium rare. Quite rare that I'm cooking at home. Well done Do you have curry sauce with your chips? If I'm up in Manchester and I have a chippy, yeah, fish chips and curry Because they don't do curry sauce down here with the chips do they?

21:15No, they don't, no, when you say well, all people down here think we just drink pints of gravy Have you had to educate your children because they're all Londoners, aren't they? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah So have you had to educate them about the Mancunian way? My kids do a very good condescending Mancunian accent and we're like, all right. All right. All right, Dad. All right. And when I take them to the football, they love... See, when we go to the City's home games up in Manchester, we'll go in a box and all that. But when we go away, they love going on the terraces with the City fans. And try to talk back.

21:47No, they just love all the characters and, you know, there's nowhere like Manchester, is there? Well, it's difficult for... For warmth. I mean, when you stand at a bus stop, I defy you not to talk to someone. All right. Yeah, but wouldn't everybody say that about the city that they were born in? No, no, no, no, no. Jesse loves not just one. Well, London belongs to England. It doesn't really belong to London. Do you know what I mean? I don't think I've ever met anyone from London in London. They're all... Are you actually from London? Yes, absolutely. My kids are born and bred in London, but I don't...

22:20I think Manchester is... I mean, I love it. It's very... There's a lot of funny characters up there, and still to this day, the people... But the club scene was fun. Oh, it's amazing. When I grew up, Twisted Wheel I used to go to, which was an amazing place to go to. We used to go to time and place. We used to hang out to see if we could see George Best anywhere. Were you doing Hacienda? I used to go to George Best's house on a Sunday. Did you? Do you know he lived in that big glass house? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And people used to go. He was like one of the Beatles, right? Yeah. And he lived in this big glass house just outside of Manchester.

22:55And people used to go for a Sunday day out in the 70s just to stand at the end of his driveway. Oh, you weren't getting invited in? No. No, you used to stand there to watch. So this is like being in the hills? Well, it was like this futuristic glass. He was like a god, yeah. It was a futuristic glass box of a house and you could see him watching TV with Miss World. Miss World. He would just go. Yeah, he was... Yeah, we used to go to his house and just stand there. Just to see if you could see. Not as kids. My parents used to take us there. Right? And it would be like families would just be stunned looking up the gate.

23:27to get a glimpse of George Best and I'm not a United fan. He was so handsome as well. He was gorgeous and he had only ever had blonde women. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And his nightclub was called Blondes. Yeah, top dude. Yeah, he was. He was great. I'm going to cut some bread. Are you really not fancy eating anything? There's a bit of asparagus, a fried egg. You don't have to have the fried egg if you don't want. You can just have the tahini and asparagus. Go on, I'll have that then. Yeah. I'll be so sad if you don't eat it. I'm looking at the most beautiful ring on your finger that looks slightly papal.

24:01Tell me about it. So when you leave school in America, you get a college ring, whereas we get a kick in the arse and a certificate that no one ever keeps. And I bought that in a porn shop in Tokyo in the 90s. And I didn't think anything of it until the internet was invented and Googled it. and it's given to somebody in Ruston. I think you get to design your own ring when you leave. So this guy, I think his name was Dwayne. Oh, it's got Dwayne on there. And I think he played number 20 for the football team. Oh, my gosh. And the football team were called the Bearcats and it's from Ruston High in Mississippi, I believe.

24:43Poor soul, I wonder why he gave it to me. Have you seen it? Well, it's all about finding him and giving it back. No, but I'll tell you a funny story. So the fact that he was in Tokyo would suggest that he'd probably join the army and he was stationed in Tokyo and he kind of pawned it for a prostitute or something. But one afternoon, I was sat in an airport lounge in America somewhere and he was a bit hungover and a guy dressed in the desert camouflage fatigues and he said, where did you get the ring from, buddy? And I was a little bit pissed and I started talking back in an American accent and I was like rushed and high and he went, I went to rushed and high and I was like, oh my God!

25:23and I went, fuck shit. And he was going, where did you go? Go Bearcats, where did you go to Ruston? I was like, oh, yeah, like, are you fucking here? And I started to sweat, and I was like, please call the flight now, you know, and luckily the flight was called. Honestly, I was dripping, I was like, fuck shit, man. And he was like, where did you go? Here, go Bearcats, man, you don't look old enough. And I was like, do you know fucking Billy Bob shit, man? Oh my God, Christy. Yeah, it was one of the most stressful events of my entire life. because he was clearly on his way back from, you know, trashing the Middle East, and he was probably going to be in a bad mood, you know, and I was like, fucking hell.

26:02Yeah, terrifying. Do you go to America often? I do. I'm going in a few weeks, yeah. I start my tour there, yeah. You're starting your tour there? Yeah. When does your album actually come out? June the 2nd. June, oh, so... You're a professional at this, isn't you? No. Seamlessly sliding into plugging my record there. We listen to the album. Do you want some water? I think it's wonderful. Or juice or... I'll take some water, yeah, thank you. Yeah, yeah. Do you know what? The older that I've got, the more I've grown to love America. I used to hate it when I went... I love it. When I was younger. Because there was too many rules.

26:32It was like, you know, you can't do this here, and this shuts at this time, and you can't smoke that there, and all that. But you kind of get to your mid-thirties and you go, it's like the pace of this life and the fucking avocados on toast during the afternoon.

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28:02So we ask everyone, if you were going onto a desert... Not something sinister. If you were going to a desert island for six months, what meal would you have before you went? Before I went? Yeah. What's my favourite meal? No, you've got starter, main, perfect drink. starter do like a bit of squid for starters do you? it would be something grilled or no you know when they deep fry it oh you like calamari oh me too I love it not Italian calamari salt and pepper I love that do you like a dip with that? do you like a garlicky mayonnaise or do you just like it the chilli dip would be the best one and for a main course what would I have?

28:58I don't know. Like I say, I'm not really... What did you have last night for your dinner? Oh, I had pizza. Do you like pizza? Love it. Okay. There's a pizza restaurant in Maida Vale called the Red Pepper which is, I swear to you now, it's the best pizza in, well, obviously I won't say in the world. Which road is it on? For Mosa Street. Oh, I know. Do you really? I was in Maida Vale last night, actually. Oh, right. With some friends on Clifton Gardens. I love Maida Vale. Yeah, yeah, it's great. I've lived around there for quite a while. It's so gorgeous, isn't it? There's another little, there's like a little Greek Turkish restaurant up a little side street I've been to.

29:37Someone was talking about a really good Greek restaurant in Maida Vale. Yeah, it's up a little side street. Oh, right, okay. On the other side of Warwick Avenue. Oh, okay. There's a great sushi place up there called Sushi Murasaki, which I'm going to tonight, I believe, with my kids. How many children have you got? I should know. Three. And they're all big grown-ups. And I saw one of your beautiful, I think she's your eldest daughter, she was taking photos of you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's 23. She's amazing. And then I've got, the eldest lad is 16 this year, and then my youngest little boy, the legend, is 13 this year.

30:1713. And are they amazing? Oh, they really are. They're the funniest. The two guys are like a comedy double act. Their entire meaning of their life is for one of them to try and get the other one into trouble. That's all they live for. That's all they live for. And it's tit for tat. So tonight when I see them, they'll be, so, ask Dee about what happened at school today. Oh, my gosh. But they are amazing, funny kids. Did we get The Last Supper? No. We've got Calamari. Yeah, he's only got calamari. It may need some salt and I will not be offended, alright? Have you got salt, darling? Yeah, I'll go here.

30:57I, um... So what would I help? Probably steak and chips, actually. I knew you were going to say that. Did you? Well, I didn't know I was going to say that. But I knew it, I felt it. Right. Yeah, steak and chips and then for dessert, apple crumble. Apple crumble. Who makes the best apple crumble? actually the one at the school dinner's after crumble the piddings were always good weren't they cake and custard yeah yeah yeah the custard and that pretty spectacular I have to say and then what drink of choice are you having beer, are you having wine are you big into do you drink? I'm big into alcohol yeah where I'm Irish it's kind of a prerequisite for living if I'm going out I will always drink beer all of the things exclusively what sort of beer?

31:50Peroni, well whatever they've got Slager if I'm staying in like this weekend for instance is one of my favourite weekends of the year why? because it's the Eurovision Song Contest I didn't know that you were a big Eurovision fan I fucking love just getting pissed and watching the utter insanity of Eurovision, it's inset I love it why didn't you go I wouldn't go to I just want to watch it in private and just laugh my bollocks off are you laughing at them or are you kind of enjoying the I'm laughing at them why just like look Kazakhstani rap really no you should wait for the finish they've got this cha cha cha and he says cha cha cha like 78 times and it sounds kind of like he's Darth Vader and he's going and he's rapping with a cha-cha choice you're going to love it brilliant and I love the I love the earnest tunes as well the We Are The World ones yeah I love that kind of thing but the Eurovision Song Contest it's far out I remember watching it when you were little oh yeah well yeah I used to sit and score it with my father oh really we'd all sit round there and Miss World right yeah remember when Miss World was a thing it was on telly on Saturday night and dad would watch it she'd eat up I've seen better than her down the pub.

33:15That's like, what pub are you going to? But no, I do like your revision song contest. I'll stay in and get a bit... But please tell me somebody else is going to be drinking with you. Maybe you should get the kids round and start doing a tally thing. I'm not going to be sitting there maudling, drinking. There'll be a few people there, don't worry about that. Oh, good. But no, I love it. I remember watching it the year when, I don't really remember this, but some Finnish guys, it was like a black metal group, and they were dressed as, they all dressed in like, they were like, dressed in... Oh yeah, I remember them.

33:52They were called Lordy, and I was sat watching it, and I was a bit stoned, right? And I was thinking, what the fuck is this? And then they won it, right? Because obviously people were voting to take the piss. And ever since then I was like, this is essential for you and all the side, didn't I? Now, these are two questions from Felix White. What a life it would be if you could come for mine for tea. Pick you up at half past three. We'll have lasagna. Who was cooking lasagna? So that song came about. At the time we were hanging out in Liverpool, we were hanging out with this band called The Real People.

34:28We had this crazy cousin, and his name was Dixie. We were just jamming in their rehearsal room one night. he got up on the mic and we were all playing one chord and he started to sing this thing went round and round and I can't remember the tune but the lyrics went what did you have for your tea tonight I had Liz it sounds really really ridiculous and then I was just stuck with me and I had this tune and it just seemed to fit it was one of those songs where you play it to the band and they go really? lasagna I'm like yeah I could you know fucking singing that fucking lasagna he fucking sung it I fucking right you know yeah it was just it was just born out of this crazy guy Dixie's bizarre mind um strawberry lemonade well yeah it was a thing from that drink Snapple wasn't it oh Snapple wow did you realise I love the peach ice tea I don't it was really big in the 90s wasn't it yeah well I was with this girl at the time who only drank this strawberry lemonade thing and that that also I thought tonight is quite an autobiographical tale of a weekend I spent with this girl in San Francisco and all she drunk was strawberry lemonade did that put you off her or was it kind of like you were like sure she tastes sweet well I was no I didn't put me off no no I mean I got a song out of it so you know that's the main thing I got a great song out of it I'll be playing that song on tour this year so oh well everyone we have it because it's like a it was a b-side wasn't it yeah all my all my best songs I gave away as b-sides like a fool yeah but no I don't but it's catalogue you've got so much you can now do that no of course but at the time I had this period from like 1993 till just 1996 where every song that I wrote became really famous but if I could go back in time now I would keep all those great B-sides and turn it into a proper album no we did we put a B-side album out but what I'm saying is at the time it would have made a colossal third album but of course when you're young and you're on the way up you're just like thinking well this is never going to dry up this is going to be amazing and I would write these songs and nobody at the record label, because we were on an indie record label and everyone was a bit mad, nobody had the wherewithal to say, that's a bit good for a B-side.

37:05They were just like, yeah, that's brilliant. I mean, yeah, it's a bit over the top. I say we gave them away because they have, I still play them, so they didn't go to waste. But it would have been nice if they were on some kind of official album. What's your favourite song to perform of all your songs? Well, it's always new ones. At the moment. It's always new ones. actually a song I've never ever ever ever gone off is Don't Look Back in Anger because it elicits it's such a hymn now and it means so much to so many people all around the world I've never gone off that one but songs as Jesse will tell you you have a moment with them and then you've just got to let them go and people will come up to your gig and say why didn't you play this song and it's like it's gone now it's like a child that's left home and that's it it's grown up and it's got married and it's fucked off thank god

37:56but the ones that you enjoy that are the new ones because it's new for you and then you get a couple of years out of them so at the moment I'm enjoying all the new ones but Don't Look Back in Anger you know if you've got that one song if you'd only written that one song for the rest of your life you'd be doing alright do you know what I mean you would definitely but without it being it's an extraordinary piece of music without it being technically an extraordinary song I think that's the appeal of it guys who are amateur guitar players can sit and play it and sing it Is it hard though to have made that?

38:36Do you have to lock it away knowing that you've got that song that will live on forever You've got to let it go but when you're writing you're not trying to better that You have to let it go and you have to accept that it was a moment in time. And thank God you had that moment. And you have to let it go in and don't... Where did you write it? I wrote it in Paris. You were in Paris? Yeah, I don't even remember writing it. We were on tour in 94, 95. And we'd been out. Well, I often wonder. Because I woke up the next... We'd been out on a really boozy night out. And I woke up the next day and there it was, written down.

39:19Not all of it, but like the outline of it and I'd kind of I'd add the chords and no idea who Sally is but we'd been at a strip club that night and now let me quantify that we'd done a gig that then turned into a strip club it doesn't matter I don't get shocked you're not a stripper are you? no I'm not a stripper and I don't get shocked she wants to know more she'll be at the strip club for you next time there's still time okay there's still time you know the internet is full of many magical things where are we going after with these short parts? and yeah I don't know who Sally is and I don't know I don't know what she must have given you a good dance I've never met a stripper called Sally they're always called Emmanuel and shit like that so my friends tell me film series called Emmanuel and yeah so you've got to let that go and accept that but it's constantly being revived because do you remember after the Manchester bombing people spontaneously Well, yeah, even when the...

40:21I'm talking about the writing, like writing and going back in. It's like... Yeah, you have to accept that other people think that's your peak moment. I don't necessarily think that. No, no, no. And I'm not saying that. Yeah, no, no, no. And if you thought that, you'd never write another song. After Wonderwall and Don't Look Back in Anger, why would you bother, right? But to me, I've written better songs than Don't Look Back in Anger. I think. I think there's a track on this album called Dead to the World that's superior to both of them. but then ask me in 10 years time is that the one that says about the heavywears no that's easy now it's the real orchestra one, it's got no drums on it it's called Dead to the World it's my favourite song on the album but I've worked out what songwriting is it's a constant transient thing and you're just you're picking up influences and then just dropping little bombs along the road of life and then that's it and some people get it and some people don't.

41:18They don't make the songs any less or more. You know, it's kind of, if it's turning you on, then that has to be enough. I wouldn't, any people that write songs for streams or clicks or to sell records, they're not in it for the right reasons. You know, you've got to, there's got to be, you know, if one person comes up to you 12 years after you wrote a song that no one's interested in and says, my, that song, that's it, that'll do. it meant a lot to someone it doesn't have to mean everything to everybody you know it's just but you know everybody but you're still so ambitious and I think that's you still you have you're prolific like you put out work all the time I don't have any other interests like I don't drive you know I don't I don't collect I can't swim I don't collect anything I'm not an avid art collector I'm not passionate about you know you've got your kids no no but that goes without saying there's like things rock stars usually get other interests and that's why they take their four off the gas you're not going to have a vineyard no I'm obsessed with writing music and the more I do it the more I want to do it and that's why in lockdown I wrote three albums I have 34 songs completed 34 songs which is going to last me now I have to stop writing now because I've got to record them all now.

42:44Right, it's true. And it's the thing that gives me, apart from my kids, which goes without saying, it's the thing that gives me the greatest sense of worth and your place in life. Do you know what I mean? This is what I do and I love it and I never take it for granted and I do a bit every day. I'm not the kind of person that sits down and says, right, from May until then I shall write a new album and it shall be about this. I chip away every day and just finish one song off and then have a look at another one Where did you learn guitar? Well I'm completely self taught Yeah yeah yeah I've never had a musical lesson Can you read music now?

43:24No I don't know anyone that can I don't know anyone that can Can you? No I can't I also like that's the thing that I'm trying to do for my kids I'm not trying to actually I'm interested I don't want to ram lessons down my kids throat but I want them to feel like they should have an instrument because I wished I'd had an instrument. It makes me feel very inadequate in the studio. Well, I'll tell you what I did for all of them and one out of the three got it. So I just left instruments around the house. Yeah. So I just left little toy keyboards in the bedrooms and little guitars and two of them are not into it, but the youngest lad kind of, he was like me.

44:03How I got it, because I just was like, right, how I got into it was this. my dad was a country and western DJ in the Irish social clubs around Manchester and I don't know whether he won this guitar at a game of cards I don't know what happened but this guitar appeared in our house and he couldn't play it and when I used to get grounded for not going to school and all that kind of and I took this guitar upstairs into my bedroom and I started to play Joy Division bass lines and then some local kids older hippie brother kind of came around and said oh my brother can tune that for and tuned it up and it's i just i was just into it you still got that guitar no no i still got a couple of early ones but but but so when you know going oh you should teach the kids and i was like well i was never taught but how i i just i i think if you force kids an instrument upon them kids like to rebel against their parents like i'm not doing that whereas i i'm still into it now and i think it's because i went to it working with family though i mean you've had the experience of course with oasis i work with mum in a different way it's a bit less apart from when we've done our sold out show in a bridgewater hall um but yeah do you do you still appreciate that the romance of having you know a sibling and a family involved in that journey up Well, it's your greatest strength and your greatest weakness.

45:30The greatest strength because when two family members sing together, it's like an instrument that you can't buy, so it immediately becomes recognisable on the radio. And you've got great rapport and connection with it, and it made Oasis what it was. By the same rule, it was its Achilles heel that eventually, you know, eventually broke the band up because you can push each other's buttons and you tend to revel in it. Did it upset your mum when you had the big fallout? No, my mum, everyone says this to me about my mum and it's like, you know, journalists, you know, getting the band back together, you know, you make your mum happy.

46:10It's like, I'm 50 fucking five. Do you think I can give a shit about what my mum's got to say about anything now? It's just like, she couldn't even control me when I was 14. Like, I've got three kids and a fucking cat, you know what I mean? What's your cat called? Boots, doesn't live with me anymore, sadly, but he was a handsome boy. Do you think you'd get another cat or a dog? Maybe. I like other people's dogs. Mates have got dogs and they're great but they're just like children. I'd rather have another baby than a dog. Do you think you might have another baby? Absolutely not. Are you sure? No, absolutely not.

46:40But you might meet someone who's younger who wants a baby. I don't like younger people. Don't you? Lenny's available. I'm free. I am. Yeah, but she's not into stripping so it's not going to work, I'm afraid. Who knows? Do you want another cup of tea to go with your cake? No, I'm okay. I'll have a spoon, though, if you've got a spoon. Yes, of course I've got a spoon. I have to say, I'm the shittest at making cakes. This looks great. But this looks, in the words of Rick Astley... Do you want some cream, darling? It's not cream, it's Greek yoghurt. And what's the other one? Creme fraiche that may be off.

47:11Hold on. No, it looks all right. Do you want a bit of creme fraiche, or is it all right? No, thanks. I've got to go sing now for two hours. Can I have a spoon, Jess? Yeah, I think we rehearsed at the same spot. Follow me on. SW19 oh no that place in Wimbledon we're in North London there was a beautiful moment that you were rehearsing and Don't Look Back and Anger I think you were just playing and we were just in the other room and it just sounded stunning it was when I was doing it acoustically yeah no it's a pleasure do you have to perform that when you're at a concert if you didn't the way I look at putting together set lists is this I always think, right, the person that I'm playing for is the person that's coming to see me for the first time.

47:56So they're going to want, if I'm going to see one of my favourite artists, Bob Dylan, or whatever, for the first time, I would think, right, I'd like him to play this, this, this, this and this. And if he did play that, that would be amazing, but I'm not too interested in that. So that's the way I look at it. It's like, there's a deal that you have to have with your audience. When you've been going for so long and I've written so many songs, it's like, I'll get to what you want to hear in a bit but let me do my thing for me first so if I don't play Half the World Away and Don't Look Back in Anger I'd be in the crowd going well why didn't you play those songs so those two are pretty much a given and then there'll be some more obscure Oasis stuff for people who've seen me a few times who were just like right I don't need to hear that again do you know what I mean and then there'll be the new stuff is for me and then there's the bit in the middle where you just kind of keep it a bit loose.

48:49I need to know if your children are stealing your clothes. Yeah. Ah. The relics. Ah, not, well, the... Would you let them? See, what I do every few months is I'll just give them all to charity every maybe six months a year. So some of that, Umbro, Capa, some of that is in a local charity shop in Buckinghamshire. Selfless... The Doctor Barnardo's in Marleybone, unwittingly, had quite a lot of Oasis clothes. I didn't have to make a big deal of it. It's just like, go and plonk these on the door. All of it. There wouldn't be a day goes by when I see a photograph and go, oh, why did I give that away?

49:35Really? Why did I give that away? There's some fucking idiot. Or some really happy person. No, but if you make a big deal of it, people will just buy it and put it on eBay. Do you know what I mean? so every kind of six months a year wardrobe would be bursting and be like right it's got to go and is there anything you have kept for sentimental reasons no I'm not sentimental I know I get rid of it I do have these moments of madness every 12 months 6 months where I go right done I'll go down to my lock up looking for something and go this is just fucking get rid of it incinerate it all and everyone will be like wait a minute it's fucking what this is kind of a stage set from such and such thing but I don't hold on to the past Do you not have one treasured possession, like someone gave you or something that you've got on the wall?

50:20Maybe it's that ring. I don't know. Yeah, I'd be... And this bracelet I bought on my travels. If I'd lost these two, I would be extremely unhappy because you wear them every day and they become part of you. What have you got written on there? Nothing. Nothing, no. Just heavy and gold. If I... Guitars. Yes, I hold on to guitars because I've written songs on them and my kids should have them or they should go into some place where people can either look at them, I don't know. But those kind of things, I would hold on. Yeah, I don't sell guitars I've written big songs on. It's all about the music.

50:57That's the romance for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Treasured possessions. I lost a pillow once on fucking tour and I was devastated. I bring my own pillow on tour. Do you bring a pillow on tour? Yes. I do. I can't. I hate tour buses so much. I'm so bad on them. And I lost a pillow once on tour. It came out. Suitcase arrived back from America and there was a pillow missing and a leather jacket. And I was like, the leather jacket, I can understand. Who's fucking stealing pillows at Heathrow Airport? You callous fuckers. I know, I agree. I know, there'd be some fucking... What kind of pillow was it? Feather?

51:29Down? It was just my pillow, do you know what I mean? I can sleep in any trashy, horrible beds, but as long as I've got my pillow... So they're not going to be doing an exhibition like David Bowie's exhibition of your clothes and things? I did, yeah, yeah. I went to the... I didn't even go to the Oasis one. I went to the Bowie one and the Pink Floyd one. Yeah, the Bowie one was great. It was fascinating seeing the lawyer's letter where he changed his name officially from David Jones to David Bowie. Some of those clothes could have been at V &A. No. You don't give a shit. You want us to look at a lot of cagools.

52:01Cagools? I mean, you've got David Bowie, there were Japanese designers and this, that and the other and like, oh, yeah, yeah. Look at this parka. Look at this Kangol hat. It's fucking mega. I really loved the Adidas trainer section that was amazing Are you pals with your brother? Our kid No Still Mum really did the reason I thought you he definitely makes overtures towards you constantly Then he should stop slagging me off on the internet Do you follow him on Twitter? No But whenever I've heard him speak he's always saying we're getting back together It's because he's insane oh right okay fine all right but you talk when you refer to our kid it sounds quite as you know that's the way we speak up north but i've got really fond memories of the oasis thing and all that and it would have to take an extraordinary chain of events for it to happen again but i'm really happy what i'm doing i love it and i love going at my own pace the thing when you're in a when you're in a band yeah it's a compromise with all the other people so everybody's got to have their own little bit and feel worth because i was the sole songwriter yeah it was difficult for the other four guys you know this is bad and this lord is thing and they didn't really have any creative input into it because i was so prolific at writing the songs so when you're if when you're in a band situation you have to compromise and what i'm doing now i can do if i want to take five years off at the end of this tour i'll do it It's like marriage, really, isn't it?

53:31Yeah. In a band thing, it's a sea of moving parts that you've all got to keep the plates spinning. And that exhausted me in the end, which is why in the end it was just like, it's time for me to quit. There was just too many plates spinning and you're trying to put one fire out and then there's another one going off. I think when you're in your 20s and 30s, it's amazing because you've got the energy to do it. Whereas when you get older, you're just like, I've got my kids now. Yeah, fuck it. Do you find the idea of, maybe because they're a bit older but how old are your youngest 13 do you find it when you're thinking and this is a kind of selfish question but do you think about the tours and think i can't be away for that long or do you feel like they're so used to well so i got back off my last time 2019 and i've been away more or less i've been on the road since 2015 and when i know what not all the time i mean back in a month but when i remember i remember going away and i had two baby sons and when I got back in 2019 the eldest opened the door and he had a tash and he called me bruv.

54:32Oh stop it! And I was like yes mate and he went yes bruv and I was like bruv? You fucking bruv? You fucking dad? You refer to me as dad and he was like yo bruv! Yo pops his back. I was like who's this guy with the tash? And then and then it's like right I was always going to take till this time off and of course pandemic happened and Covid and things got a bit tricky. Where did you spend lockdown? Well we just don't know whether I thought at the time it's luckily it's maybe not the greatest life decision we'd made. Just before the pandemic we decided we were going to move out of London and we were in Hampshire and of course it was a twofold thing out there where you don't feel like you're in a pandemic because in the middle of the country you never see anyone from day to day anyway but the good but then you're kind of you know you're there and that's it yeah you can't dip into london for a couple of nights and you can't see your mates and you're locked in yeah so it was a tricky time for everybody but um i um yeah it was out there it was it was just i mean the only good thing that came out was which i wrote a lot of music how good were you at homeschooling?

55:48Dreadful. Did you? Dreadful. I remember my lad was like, Dad, where's the Philippines? He shouted as he's in his underpants, right, at the one end of the table. And I was like, Google it. Google it. And when we looked at his Google search, he Googled in, where the fuck are the Philippines?

56:11He was by 11 at the time. And I was like, this kid is a fucking prodigy. Where the fuck are the Philippines? Before you go off to do rehearsals for the tour. Do you want another piece of cake? No, thanks, I'm fine. Would you like one for later for that afternoon, kind of pick me up? No, no, no, I'm fine. I'll have an apple in the afternoon. You're quite healthy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't, yeah, I don't, I'm not, like I said, I don't eat a great deal. I kind of have a big breakfast and whatever I want done. During the day, I usually skip lunch and crack on doing what I'm doing, but a pink lady apple is my thing.

56:45I love, do you know they're really good for you? they will lower your blood pressure. Do they really? Yeah. This is why I'm so chilled, as you can see. This is why he's so relaxed. He's been laid back, yeah. Yeah. Can I ask you one taste that can transport you back to somewhere, good or bad?

57:05So in Ireland, they have a thing called soda bread. Yes. So if I was to have soda bread with loads, loads of butter on, like my mum used to give us in between coming home from school and having tea as we call it off not dinner that would remind me of growing up so soda bread and a real builder's cup of tea that would be my thing Noel thank you so much for coming over and chatting and good luck with the album it's beautiful where are you playing in London I'm doing open airs in the summer playing at Crystal Palace Oh nice Oh around the corner Yeah and then I'm doing the arenas In the winter I'm playing at Wembley Wembley Arena So anyone Thank you Well thank you very much Thank you Thanks for coming No worries You're very handsome Oh here we go I just wanted to tell you I'm not going to slip off But you are very handsome And you've got gorgeous blue eyes Come on Sally Telling you now Telling you now I'll give you my number I'll give you my number When you talk Okay You won't be living On your own anymore We'll get you backstage Oh God OK, get out of my fucking house.

58:28This is the last of our second helpings. But we couldn't resist, could we? No, absolutely not. And then we'll be back with, actually, we've got a very special surprise for you next week. A little treat. An extra treat. So, an aperitif, shall we say. But, yeah, it's been a pleasure doing the second helpings and finishing with the brilliant Noel Gallagher. Well, absolutely. And, Jessie, just one thing I want to say. What? Don't look back in anger. I heard you say. I heard you say.

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