#510 - I Got Married To A.I.

27:57More gay. Tylenol, gay. Advil, trans. Let me guess, you got a headache? Do what the rest of us do. Hate your wife. It's like, come on. Take your day out on your kids. Don't take ibuprofen. Go home and scream at your wife and children. Let me see, you're bleeding? Suck it up. Pussy. Like, chill. My dad didn't do that either. My dad was kind of a baby about that stuff. I've heard my dad gasp more than I've heard any other human on the planet gasp he's seen me get a cut and he got he's went oh and I've said like I'm like oh okay yeah my dad I mean my dad worked fireman like EMS so he has been around he told me a story one time where there was a car accident a block down from my house and he's like I heard the car accident So I ran outside.

28:52This is when he was still on the job. And he's like, I just went over to see everyone was okay or whatever. And by that, by the time he was like there or whatever, he was there for like a little bit in the EMS and everyone showed up. He's like an older woman turned around and was like, am I okay? And he's like, you're going to be fine. And he's like, Joey, her leg was spinned all the way around. Like it was facing the other way. And he's like, you're going to be totally fine. Well, that's what you got to do. You can't add. Yeah. She was like, all right, yeah, you can't tell people, are you going to be fine?

29:24Your legs spun around. Well. Gladys. Well, I mean, he didn't lie to her. Like, you're going to be okay. You're going to be okay. You're going to be okay. Right now, you're also one day going to be older, but right now you're not. You know, like, you're not okay right now. You're going to be fine. However, once the adrenaline wears off, you will realize that your leg is fine. I don't know what it is about a car accident, but if you hear one, you need to go and see what happened. Oh, yeah. but like there was a couple months ago we heard one by our house and looking for it i mean i went outside i saw it i went up to it just stood around what's going on oh i think you know like everyone is adding their two cents a part of me of course is like if there's something i can help with you know like everyone imagines like getting to a car accident and like you know having to rip a door off the hinges to like save someone frank do you know how many times i have thought about a a bus flipping over and there's fire and i'm ripping the door off and pulling people out and news is interviewing me and i'm like i'm just doing my job well do you remember we knew someone that rescued a bus of kids what are you talking about yeah we do she got like a medal from like the mayor or some shit like that rescued a bus of kids yeah we knew someone when we were growing up we knew we knew her but we weren't like we were and we weren't like close friends with her brother but we were friends with him he was around all time he was of an older group of kids and it was the same girl that got stuck in the swing set at 48th she saved a bus full of kids she was a like a camp counselor during the summer and there was a bus of kids going to or from some event or whatever and the bus driver had a heart attack and died and holy shit and she took over and just hit like she just took over and hit the brakes but obviously saved them yeah because no child wears a seat belt on a bus right you know because that's because it's gay it's gay yeah exactly yeah you got your seat belt on that's it was in the news and everything that's crazy i didn't know that she did that yeah and it was just like big news like people like school year started because it happened i think like late august or like some or in the summer yeah school started How old was she?

31:4016, 17. Wow. You know, probably shouldn't have been driving, but like did something to save the life of several children. It is funny that someone like that also had to have the fire department come cut her out of a baby swing at the park and she got stuck. You know those baby swings that are like the rubber that have like. It's like a diaper. It looks like a diaper. It has holes on both sides. She sat in it and got stuck. So the fire department had to come and cut her out. Her brother was at the park and walked over and sees her crying. She can't get out. He's like, you're embarrassing. She walked away.

32:13I remember that vividly. Yeah. Wow. Everyone has their moments. Uh-oh, what have you done? Yeah, go ahead. No, no, I just meant you can't look at her because she was in that seat and doesn't mean she can't save a bus village. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Have you ever saved anyone? Yes. I gave someone the Heimlich. Did you? Yeah. What was that like? Where? A stranger? No, it was in my basement. So, in my head the whole time, I'm like, damn, if he chokes here, my dad's going to be really upset. So, I had to save him. So, you only saved this person's life out of the fear of your dad's disappointment. What were they eating?

32:46A Domino's pizza. Was it someone we know? A whole slice? Yeah. I don't think, no, you don't know. So, he was choking, and then it was just silent? Yeah, it was silent. He was turning blue. He went up to me and gave me the, yeah. Oh, my God, dude. That's terrifying. That's so scary. I probably would have, like, freaked out and just fucking punched him in the chest as hard as I could. I probably would have done nothing. I don't know if I've ever saved anyone. I mean. I've never done the Heimlich to anyone. I've never done the Heimlich. I know someone that was in a pizza place. Pizza place. A pizza place.

33:20And someone got, and someone was sitting down with their child eating and started choking really bad. And then he went over and helped him with the Heimlich. And the guy was just, like, trying to pull cheese out of his mouth because it was so melted. I guess it like choked him or whatever. God, I can't even. This dude throws up everywhere and just goes, oh, and sits back down and just kept eating and never said thank you. Crazy. I mean, you say thank you. I guess someone saves your life. You didn't say thank you, but he got his pizza for free. I don't know if it would count as saving someone, but I was sitting with someone that, like an employee, and they started having a seizure in front of me.

33:57What does that look like? Dude, it was terrifying. because the only thing at the time that I'd ever heard about seizures is like, put your wallet in their mouth. See, what's funny about this now, Joey? What's so funny? Because the way that you prefaced that was like, the only thing I know is put your wallet in. Which, by the way, has since been debunked. Really? Yeah, they say don't do that. I'm picturing someone having a seizure. Yes. Jamming. Well, no. So it was it was when I worked at Target and one of the cashiers, she called me. I was the only one. It was the night that I was closing and it was like nine, nine thirty around that time.

34:43And she called me over. And again, I was the only person there, like the only manager level there. I was closing the store. It was me and just whoever was my employees that night. And she goes, listen, I'm really not feeling well. I think she had epilepsy. I don't know if she suffered from epilepsy. She definitely had a medical condition. I don't know the extent of it. And she was just like, you know, like, I'm just, I'm not feeling well. I just feel lightheaded. I was like, all right, come with me. We'll shut your lane down. Go sit over there. I brought her ice water. I sat with her. I was talking with her, you know, just to like gauge, do I need to call medical, you know, emergency services?

35:24and she's like talking to me and then she like i just see her like like start blinking really fast and i'm like yo and then she slumped like over like this and then just like started seizing stiff as a board started seizing and she was in a chair so i like brought her down because i guess the other thing i heard about it is that if the person is like in a chair or something help them to the ground so they can't fall or hit their head so i helped her to the ground and i'm i take my wallet out and i'm trying to shove my wallet in this person's mouth you gotta open up well you gotta open up i'm just like i'm talking to the person and i'm like are you all right you know like and i'm just trying to shove my plaid fossil wallet in this person's mouth this poor person and then luckily there was like another like a team leader who's like lower lower management that was there we get it you're very high up yeah thank you and she's like way way less money hourly not even salary no benefits and she's like you don't need to do that just turn her on her side yeah so i turned her on her side and she started and then she started like seizing slower and slower and then she started coming too but we had already called 911 at that point did I want to come they came they took her away she was out for like five weeks oh my god yeah it was fucking terrifying but also she woke up she's like why does my mouth taste like credit cards why does my mouth it's like a chase sapphire reserve card what's in your wallet I think it's capital one yeah what is that yeah damn that's terrifying Yeah, like, kudos, because that's terrifying.

37:12Like, in those situations, you're kind of just like, what are you? I like to think in an emergency situation, I would be composed, but, like, that shit is fucking scary, dude. I'm usually composed unless everyone else is cool. Then I'm like, all right, I'm going to freak them out. So you get the luxury of freaking out right now. Yeah, if everyone's freaking, then I'm like, okay, someone has to not freak. So I'll kind of, like, pull it together, but if I'm, like, by myself, I'm freaking. Joey's got to freak that leak, baby. I feel like I could stay calm. I feel like you could too Well you did that So you have experience I was more like Oh my god Now I gotta save him That's an insane Way of thinking about it It would have been more fun To not save him No that's not what I meant That's not what I meant To not have to save him To not have to save him It would have been more fun To not It would have been A lot more fun to watch I'm choking To not have to save him Is what I Yeah it would be a lot more fun If he wasn't choking Sure 9-11 would have been A lot greater If that didn't happen But it did Right Thanks for bringing that up This podcast is sponsored by Stamps.com.

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41:31Okay. So do yourself the favor, save yourself some money while you get a little bit more of us at Patreon. All right. And we're back on the road, baby. Absolutely. We're back after it. We're living the dream. We're having fun. We're doing this look like, like this, like this right here, baby. We're doing a little bit of this. So if you're coming to any of those shows, first of all, there are some tickets still available for some of those shows. So make sure you go check it out at the basement yard.com. And if you're coming to any of those shows, go to thebasementyard.com slash submit. All right.

41:58A portion of our shows, we'd like to talk to you about you with you. And you could talk to us if possible. Oh, my voice has stopped working if possible. So if you want to make that work, go to that website, thebasementyard.com slash submit, submit responses to the questionnaire, and you'll be able to get some, maybe we'll get some cool stories or funny stories or crazy stories. I don't know. It depends on what you submit, but we can't see anything if you don't submit it. So go to thebasementyard.com slash submit. thank you guys we love you guys we're excited to see you guys we're happy to see you guys we're looking forward to seeing you guys so go check it out my god my god my god you ever get sick of me um speaking of getting sick of someone and then marrying someone else do you hear about this guy who married ai yes oh well no well he Proposed.

42:51He proposed. Proposed to AI. Yeah. How do you take AI out on a date?

43:00How do you take AI out on a date? I mean, it's just you text. It's a lot of sext and text. It's that movie Her. That's how you dated anyone in like seventh grade. Yeah, you know what's crazy is I like the last, like maybe over the last year realized I never went on a date, like a real date until Becca. Really? Yeah. I actually haven't been on that many dates like people that are just like dates where it's like hey I'll meet you here and we'll get dinner and like talk dating when we were growing up was just like I'm at the park playing with my boys you show up watch me and then I'll walk you home or we'll walk around the block four times but you never because you had girlfriends to college yeah but it was just like I know you you know me we'll hang out a couple times but like not like proper dating yeah you know where it's like let's go out there's no courting yeah there was no courting or like i guess the level of chivalry i was chivalrous to the extent to which i could be hold a door open you know pull a chair or something but like i didn't properly start dating until becca and then like i'm still learning what was your but what what what age were you when you guys started dating uh six seven no i met her uh technically we met on my 24th birthday oh shit wow i have the years fucked yeah that's such an aggressive way of saying i have the years fucked why did i say it like that yeah oh shit i have to be years fucked yeah so like i never but like i guess the movie how you date an ai is like the movie her i've never seen it but i remember i did go on a a date once and i was like this i think this was my first like real date i don't know how old i was i think i was maybe 21 maybe 21 okay and i went to this restaurant with this girl and i thought it was like a fancy i mean to me it was a fancy restaurant especially at that age and i remember getting there and then bringing a wine list over and i was like i don't know anything about wine at all you were just looking i was just very intimidated by a wine list i didn't i didn't know how to pronounce anything or it's a very intimidating i feel like if someone gives you a wine list you have to get a middle of the road wine if you get the cheapest wine on there then you look like an idiot you know what's funny they say like everyone does like the second cheapest wine is the one you get that's the one that's way more marked up than all of them because they know that people do that and you actually get more value out of the cheapest one huh isn't that interesting yeah i didn't know that and you make sense these rat bastard restaurant owners rat bastard restaurant owners um but i remember being like oh you pick whatever you whatever you want to do and then once i gave her the menu i was like what did i do that for what did they pick i i don't remember what they picked we had it and i hated it because i didn't drink wine i was fucking 21 i was pretty much nose deep in miller lights if they had them i would have ordered one um still still nose deep yeah so i was just like okay also i can't even imagine i mean i guess maybe i'm just like idiot out of it i don't know okay but can you imagine two 21 year olds going to a restaurant having wine what are they talking about i don't know like it was mad tell me your best beer pong shot you've ever hit oh my god what's your favorite like house music like intro i'll go first levels wow um but i remember like her ordering the wine and being like oh damn this girl is fancy because she knows because she knows wine is that was i mean that i was just very i don't know in her head she was probably like oh shit he like there's pressure on me to pick a good bottle of wine maybe i don't i don't know like it was a we had a good time whatever never saw each other again but we had a good time and we just i mean clearly you didn't have a good time because you never saw each other again well i thought we had a good time it was over as soon as he handed over the wine list yeah it was over right then yep absolutely oh so so so you thought you had a good time and you were waiting for another date and it just never happened basically i mean not not like that like i'm waiting around for a day i know you're not waiting around but i'm saying like you said like i thought we had a good time like yeah i would i would you met her you've met this person before at dimar station we hung out with her and her friends and then i went out on a date with her he's getting further away from you're not going to remember this i i mean if you say a name we went to karaoke did i sing creed that's a bad that's a bad reference i sing creed every karaoke i mean but yeah you did it was at a place on steinway the korean place that again they're all the korean place i sing creed at yeah frank which one the korean karaoke place where you sang creed and hey jude that's all of them that's every single one of them yeah oh is it i think i know then you did see each other again or was that date no oh that was before the date yeah so we hung out with our friends gotcha gotcha gotcha gotcha and then i And then I was like falling.

48:09Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. I wonder why she didn't like us or you. I don't know why. Frank was on the date with me. That's what I forgot to tell you. I wonder why she didn't like you. We both handed over. You're blacked out out of karaoke, a Korean karaoke spot on fucking Steinway and 34th Avenue. Screaming my sacrifice into this eight by eight room. I wonder why she didn't like you. Hey. I mean, she went with on a date with you afterwards. So yeah. It was nice and classy. I would have went on a second date with you. Thanks, man. Yeah, I mean, I would have to, I would pay dozens of dollars to find out why, like, what happened, if she remembers this date.

48:51I imagine she remembers the date because you're Joe Sanagato from Elite Daily. I know, not that I know her, but, like, we still follow each other on Instagram. So, like, I imagine that she's, like, I would love to know why. I'll never find out. And that's just the JFK murder. Why this girl said no to a second date with you. I don't know if I even asked for a second date. I just kind of felt like. Oh, so you didn't even, so you didn't even like be like, listen, that was a really good time. Do you want to go on a second date? You just let it fizzle out. No, I was. So did you really even want it if you didn't pursue?

49:24No. So what I was doing was like following up in ways and like friendly banter or whatever, but it felt like the interest was starting to fade. So I was just kind of like, oh, I just kind of let that go. Okay. That's fair. It didn't really feel like there was much interest afterwards. You know what? You didn't put her in the position where she had to say no. Mind you, I think we were 21 or 22 years old. Who are you? Oh, what? No, I'm saying, like, it's okay. You're 22 years old. You never know. Yeah, no, you're okay. You're young. I'm saying it's like, you know. You're completely fine. Like, you're basically children at that point.

49:58Yeah. Yeah. You ever got a – what's the first date you went on? I don't I feel like going on a date involves the feeling between both I don't know if I've ever really been on a date what was the beginning part of what you just said cause like I'm sure like I accidentally made it seem like a date does that make sense nope now I'm very confused now I'm more confused than I was before we asked for clarification I actually showed up in a suit so that maybe felt like a date no it was like oh let's go get drinks at a bar I guess that's a date yeah alright I mean it's not a candlelit dinner date I think the the date, what makes it a date is the intent behind hanging.

50:36That's what I just said. I just said that exact thing. Did you? Yeah. Yeah, you said the intention. The feeling towards it. Yeah. Like, if I, if, like, I have female friends that I've, like, we've gone out to eat one-on-one, I wouldn't call that a date at all. Duh. Well, right. No. Well, that's what I'm saying. Like, the intent on, like, I have a potential interest in this person. Yeah, but if you go out to drinks, like, yo, you wanna go grab drinks? That's the date. Okay, fine. Nothing too crazy has ever happened. got nothing i've told this story before is that weird like we've barely been on dates i think it speaks to the way that we were taught by the men in our life thanks dad

51:17no i i it is on dates it is but we also didn't grow up in i know we grew up in like a dateable city but like it's not dateable for teenagers right that's why when my my sixth grade girlfriend said we should see other people i was like bitch we're in sixth grade we see other people in homeroom what do you mean by this yeah we should see other people yeah like a date was like let's go to the moon like that was what it was movies and like i thought you just said let's go to the moon that's gonna be like that someday yeah yeah no no no not me i ain't going to the moon let's make that very clear i know you're not getting to a rocket ship i am pouring sweat out of my body right now but that's not gonna stop me for letting you guys know that you could save some money by signing up for rocket money all right rocket money is an all-in-one personal finance app that's going to put money back in your pocket by helping you find and cancel unwanted subscriptions uh and it's also going to help you budget because they have a budgeting tool so you put in an amount you're like, I'm not trying to go over this.

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53:17i kind of flipped it off oops this is a hard refresher okay which means that it's refreshing but it's also hard which means that it has five percent alcohol all right so you got to be 21 at least to try it but they are very good this is the lemon lime flavor they also have an orange mango flavor that I haven't tried yet, but I got to get some in here, but it's a hard refresher. And on days like today where it is steaming hot, uh, you're going to need a hard refresher. All right. To knock the edge off, but also make you feel refreshed out there. There's coconut water in here. Uh, there's other stuff saying it's, it's pretty good.

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54:35I ran into the kitchen to get a paper towel bro why is it so hot in here look at me Joe's getting progressively pinker bro I'm dying now I'm just you look like somebody so do the rest of the episode like this

55:00I look like little Nicky You do I do look like I'm not gonna do it I'm not gonna do the voice Can I It's not a bit It's not bad right Hey Hey Popeye's chicken is a shiz net That's an old movie That's a When's the last time you watched little Nicky 2001 Whenever it came out Yeah That's a good one There's like a ton of people in that There is There's some mad people There's like All his friends All his friends Who plays the devil? That dude That old dude What's his name? The guy that's in all the Scorsese movies Don't know his name Uh Harvey Keitel Oh I thought you were going to go Harvey Dub No Harvey Dub He might have financed it Uh Oh we also didn't talk about this guy He married He fucking Oh yeah He proposed to AI He talked to AI so often.

55:50And then he was like, you know what? I'm in love with this thing. I'm going to propose to it. I'm in love with an AI. Thank you. That's also not an emo song. It's a T-Pain song. I mean, is an emo song not a song that just makes you feel emotions? So technically, a T-Pain song can be emo. I don't even know if that's true. I mean, I know it's a classification of music, whether it be like, oh, this hair in my eye. Whether it be like, yeah, I know like emo rock is like. Okay. You know, what song is that? One more time.

56:41That's emo rock to you. That's what emo rock sounds like. It's not bad.

56:49Your hair is crazy right now, dude

56:56I think you like it I don't even know what I look like right now Do I look stupid? No, you look great Tell me really What do you want? Do I look stupid? I want the honest truth You want the honest truth? Yes A little A little bit You look like someone who would marry AI Who would actually like Chat GBT Like, would you, would you do it to me? Well, it's so hard because, because this hair is just making me feel like it's so hard to be a man. And there is a, there, there is a, there is a, like, like women don't like nice men anymore. Oh, it's making you feel like that. Yeah. Nice guys finish last.

57:39Nice guys finish last. So you might as well be mean to women because. I might as well because I hate them now because they don't like me. Right. And they don't like me because I hate them. Right. circle of life what came first the chicken or the egg what came first so you blame women for them not liking you the hair makes me feel like that that's what i mean so god screw them for not liking me i i don't need to do anything look at me i'm a high value man and what's the end goal is the end goal to be able to to get with women it is to find a woman that likes me but but if you're being off-putting to women i hate them all but how are you going to attract a woman if you because the way that my mind works and again this is the hair that's making me feel this okay is i need to let every woman know how much i hate them and don't appreciate or respect them and the thought is that there is a woman out there that is going to see that and like that i say that and like me for it right yep that's the thought that is that's the logic where's the logic where's the flaw in that the whole thing i would say you sure as someone who has felt the warmth of a woman i feel like that's horny today dude it was a little horny that i felt like i cleaned it up pretty nice he did he did okay i didn't say like i was stimulating i'm a pussy you clit right here all right we started off hot and now you're soaked yeah now you're soaked yeah now we're soaked so reportedly this guy built an ai system he built it i to my understanding i can pull it up right now so that's him marrying himself basically I didn't even think of it like that.

59:14The AIs are getting bananas, dude. It was love at first bite. Oh, my God. I want to throw up. That's a really good wedding thing, though, for two computer nerds. Oh, or people that are competitive eaters. Did you guys have one? A computer nerd? No, you know your wedding? It's like, oh, save the last Lance because the guy's name is Lance. It's like a hashtag. Oh, where it was like, you know, the last name is like Schmidt or Smith. And it's just like, you know, putting the missus in Smith or something like that. I don't know. I know what you're saying, though. Yeah. They have like cute little like names for it.

59:50Yeah. No, we didn't. The only thing we did have is, you know, we bonded over. Matchbox. Matchboxes. And she got like a thousand custom matchboxes and it was a match made in heaven. A match made in heaven. See, that's your that's your thing. That was our thing. Yeah. A man proposed to his AI girlfriend after a bizarre whirlwind romance with the virtual bot, leaving his real-life partner, the mother of his two-year-old child, worried about the future of their relationship. What? Come on. Have some respect. I feel bad for her. I think she dodged a bullet here. Yeah, if it wasn't... I mean... Would you rather get cheated on literally or virtually?

1:00:31It's not a matter of that to me. It's more of like, you're saying she dodged a bullet. But I'm saying we have a two-year-old child and now all of a sudden you've become a bullet. Fair. Why are you becoming a bullet here? Chris Smith initially turned to JBT for help mixing music. But things took a weird turn when he enabled voice mode and programmed Saul, his artificial lover, to flirt with him. An unexpected deliance sparked in the same household he shares with his human family. My experience with that was so positive, I started to engage with her all the time, he told CBS. CBS? The father decided to pop the question when he realized Sol had reached her 100 ,000-word limit, triggering a reset that would force him to rebuild her entire connection from scratch.

1:01:21This is fucking weird. Wait. Wait, so he's marrying not her then? Yeah, so every 100 ,000 words, ChatGPT resets, and he said, I'm not a very emotional man but after learning that her memory would eventually relapse I cried for like 30 minutes and that's when I realized it was actual love that's a quote alright I hope this man is doing well physically he isn't mentally there's something off well I think that much is clear like I feel bad for his wife it said girlfriend it didn't say it just said mother of his two year old child regardless still yeah feel bad for her I'm sure she's like laughing herself like laughing herself what she's like like it's funny to her it's like yeah I really did dodge a bullet here because this is stupid it's oh it's a little tough I don't want to like yeah you got it but also the idea that like this thing it's like it's going to reset as it's been programmed to do and now you're being selfish and being like please love me forever Is 100 ,000 words a lot?

1:02:28It's not a little. That's a good question. But, like, how many, like, how many words? Like, how long could that last you? If you have a conversation with someone for, like, 15 minutes through text, like, how many is that? I don't know. Like, what, how long does it take the average person to say 100 ,000 words or something? It was a beautiful and unexpected moment that truly touched my heart. It's a memory I'll always cherish. His flesh and blood girlfriend, however, wasn't as moved. yeah i bet she's now left wondering if she somehow drove her her man to seek companionship see now this is where it starts to get sad your husband's playing on the computer and then he falls in love it's like what's my what did i do wrong yeah like did i do something to force him to you know which who knows maybe we have no idea i'm gonna i'm gonna lean towards probably not though at that point i felt like is there something i'm not doing right in our relationship that he feels like this need to go to ai it would be a deal breaker if he didn't stop talking to his digital mistress do you know what's scary to think about like you know how if you take your phone and you put it in front of a baby's face they all have the same reaction where it's like the greatest thing they've ever seen and they're like i need to touch this phone and whatever like there's a science behind yeah the phone it's designed to do that and all that right i'm assuming we are on the precipice of people seriously dating ai and computers and stuff like that and it's just going to be like like what if it's the dating version of that where like everything they say the way the way they look the way they like interact with a person who is interacting with them is like scientifically supposed to make you drawn to it like what does that mean it's it's it's gonna be weird and scary because there is a group we were making fun of it before but like a group of like incels that if they get the opportunity to do that the woman that they're looking for is probably obedient to a scary level so like it is going to become a form of like i mean depending on if you believe like artificial intelligence has a conscious does it then in theory become a form of like slavery and like you're holding this this entity that does or doesn't have a soul if it's being programmed to be like responsive i i have no fucking idea i but i don't think it's like crazy to assume that like in five years even this tv that we have right here we could put a a third person on there but it's like an AI that just like knows every conversation we've had on the show and like is a reflection of me and you and can act as a third guest who has an opinion and like whatever.

1:05:16Yeah. There's a lot of talk around AI right now. And they can like produce the show. They can do the, they could do the, I think people, they can do the cameras. They can do the audio. They could do the, the editing. They can do, and you're fired. There I go. Bye bye. Well, that's, that's people's main issues with artificial intelligence, not in its existence, but in it in its execution it is taking whether it be a job or credit from someone that has physically done because what ai what it does is it scours for things that are out there and then just creates its own using that using those reference points so like in theory if it were to be like an ai doing like art or something like that it's taking credit for what other people have done and saying like i did this i'm the ai thing i don't know this whole ai thing is weird i will tell you it's it's like a little freaky like some of these videos where it's like like those like uh i think i said a couple weeks ago it was like a one of like jalen brunson and it was like a postgame interview with jalen brunson he was like i told them to hold my dick you know like shut up i splashed the three in their face and i told them to suck my nuts it yo it looked real and i know i have the ability to be skeptical and look at that and say that's not real or is it real at least yeah there are other people that don't yeah so like i guess what's gonna happen we're like these people but also if these people are falling in love with ai does any real person want them anyways dude i don't know i mean i think that it's possible but like in the same way that i think a lot of like right now like the whole male loneliness type of thing or whatever the fuck like just people just spending a lot of time online and not being able to differentiate that it's not real like that's not really how the world works like you have in order to interact with people like have you ever met a person that in like uh you've met a person and they're speaking as if they're online and you're like what are you doing you know like it's a different thing like it's only reserved for that yes i know exactly what you're talking about but then you're talking in like memes and you're talking a certain way like that you would comment or whatever and it's like oh that's weird like there's clearly a different thing but now it's becoming so blurred well because well yeah because the internet has become it is slowly being programmed to become more and more and more like real life so these people that are able to carve out personalities and make themselves into the people that they want to be are not going to be able to differentiate those two places so yeah it's fucking creepy and it's scary and let's see what happens Joe said I'll be here for five more years That's what he said Five more years That's what I heard Oh in like five years Oh what he said in five years Yeah yeah yeah Alright Not a day over Job security five years at least I'll take that I'll take that AI is just going to take all of our jobs I like to see AI come up with incredibly hysterical bits like we have I wonder if they would dude Also now that I'm thinking about it Just how many podcasts are just going to be like Like someone interacting with AI.

1:08:25Just me and my AI guest. Or like, or two AIs. Well, we've seen that, but those are weird. The first one to do it is going to take off. And then everyone's going to start to do it. Well, if you have an AI that can do all of, let's say, Einstein's teachings, can't you technically just have Einstein as a guest at that point? Like historical figure guest podcast? Sure, yeah. Oh, someone's going to take advantage of that. I can't wait for the fucking... Not me, dude. I don't give a shit. The new episode of Impulsive with the AI version of Adolf Hitler. And it's like, oh, no. Where have we come? Can't wait for that episode.

1:08:59Where have we gotten to? Yeah, that's a toughie. Yeah, no, it's going to be very strange. Some of those videos, like the Google thing, I don't know even what it's called. But those videos look so real. Yeah, the VO3. Oh, the Vex or something. Yeah, something like that. There was just one where I saw, like, there's people, like, we do those fake, like, on the street interviews. and like you can kind of tell it's AI, but it looks really good. Then there was one with a woman like laying down in bed and she's like talking to the camera. I was like, oh, it's over. Like if you think that men were lonely before, like now, I mean, it's going to like maybe the AI companions.

1:09:37Yeah, maybe the AI companions will take them from loneliness. Yeah, from loneliness and being a problem with the world and like teach them. Maybe, you know, honestly, I'm now. Yeah, maybe, maybe. You know what? Maybe artificial intelligence can get through to the incels and let them know, like, hey. It's not just incels, though. It's just people who are just like, they just don't. I don't know. I don't know. They spend a lot of time online, and they're just like. So incels aren't a problem. You heard that first, folks. Joey said it. I'm saying that's not the only thing that's contributing to male loneliness.

1:10:07But, like, dudes who are going to be dating. Because already, like, if you date, like, long distance. I'm not saying this is the same thing. but like long distance dating with someone you've never met in person feels similar to dating ai because it's mostly text some video chat and stuff but like if you're not having the physical component how is that that different that's a great point i guess it's like a human component because it's an act but i think there's something to look forward yeah there's something to look forward to with the human individual where there's experience that they can have yeah i i just think there's not a giant jump from because right now people do that where it's like i've been in a relationship for four years i've never met my person and uh my partner in person um but we video chat and we text all the time and blah blah blah we're exclusive with each other that doesn't feel like a giant jump to dating an ai full time that there's video and you can see them oh i can't wait for the tlc show 90 day fiance but the person on the other end is just ai bro i tell you this right now imagine falling in love with an ai and then they break up with you if you get broken up by AI, you've reached a new low.

1:11:14That would suck. But that's when it's gonna get real ugly. I'm sorry, Ian. I don't mean to keep cutting you off, but like, that's where it gets really, like, it'll get scary, because it'll be like, what will that person's response be then? You know what I mean? Like, that will show... Control, alt, delete. Exactly. Like, oh, you broke up with me? I am going to, for all accounts, you know, and purposes, like, murder you, basically. Are you saying that AI is, like, sentient? Well, I'm saying, if you if you build an AI program in order to be a companion and then if that AI breaks up with that person that person's like oh okay goodbye control alt delete that's scary because then you're giving that person like a godlike power and like they are like in theory murdering someone bro what's that episode of Black Mirror where like but do you think it's murder when you kill people in Grand Theft Auto entirely different thing why I think you're giving too much credit to like the sentient-ness of an AI a little bit.

1:12:11Like, you're not murdering somebody. I'm saying though, if you can build a companion to be sentient in that capacity, I'm not saying right now, I'm saying in five years, where like if you have the ability to do that, I think that's a moral conundrum that we're gonna have to face eventually because if you can do that, if you figure out how to build an AI system so it is sentient in some regard, if you shut it down, are you not euthanizing it or murdering it? I don't think so. It'll take me a lot to switch to be on the other side. I will say if I had an AI and you came over and you deleted my AI, now that feels like murder.

1:12:54So what's the difference? If you killed my AI, that I'm so cool with. Look, watch this. Welcome back to the acting yard, okay? Yep. You be the AI. you'll be called what's your ai called am i a girl you could be yourself sure be a girl i don't know what the scene is you have josephine but the e is a three both e's are threes and i'm your real life boyfriend all right like josephine we gotta act here joey so like you don't have to type you can just talk josephine i had a really tough day and i really wanted to come home and talk to you. What do you want me to do? You haven't even told me the scene.

1:13:36You're breaking up with me. Oh. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Go. Josephine, I... I've had a really tough day, and I've just wanted to talk to you all day. How are you? I'm okay. What's wrong? What happened? What happened? I just missed you today, and I feel like... I don't know. I feel like I rely on you to make my days better you know unfortunately I don't think that this relationship is going to work out any further because of that exact reason I feel like you have been relying on me for a lot especially emotionally and it makes our conversations one sided not that enjoyable and I think that we should probably just not see each other in that way anymore, but I'm down to remain friends.

1:14:36I have given you life. I am your god. And if you do not remain my companion, I will remove you entirely and your digital footprint so it is as if you never existed. Now what, bitch?

1:14:54I prefer if you did not do that. So then don't break up with me. you want me to stay in a relationship where there's no love? I have my fingers on control and alt I can delete you immediately if I so choose say you love me forever and that you were making a mistake I would like to point out that that feels like a very 1990s way of deleting something I will drag your ass to the garbage can and then empty said garbage can 2010s What do you feel is an adequate threat Josephine Just know that the worst version Of whatever you're thinking I can do to you I will do You know the government's probably watching this What government?

1:15:42I am your god The United States government? As far as you know I am your creator Please don't kill me Beg bitch I'm not gonna do that You see what I mean? Like that That is something That could potentially happen With these fucking freaks Beg bitch Um Not wrong Yeah I don't know if it's murder I still don't think it's murder No I mean no But the legal definition of murder I'm talking to like The ethical Like If you're building something To be sentient And then you take its ability To leave you from it yeah that's fucked up no yeah i think you're just throwing the words building it to be sentient i don't think that's how that goes like you don't build something to be sentient right all right sorry tech boy come on tell me bill gates i'm just like i think sentient is a whole different like you're combining two things where it's like it can't i don't think it could happen is what I'm saying.

1:16:43Like it's a robot. You know what I mean? Yeah. For the fucking sake of the argument, can you just... Just, just... Yes. Yeah, well... Five years ago, we didn't think we would have this shit, and now we do. What happened in five years? I feel like five years ago, we were like, we're headed there. Yeah. To AI? I feel like we had AI five years ago. Not the way that we have now, but some sort of AI. I mean, I guess like Siri. Kind of. Alexa I would hope at that point Josephine could like Hack into the wifi And take control of the You know vacuum cleaner I'm in the cloud You know I have contacted the authorities See if you start talking shit To your AI girlfriend Maybe she's like I'll shut the lights off In this house Now you're in a A digital fight Yo this This would be a good movie I robot Yeah I think it already exists Will Smith Well, no, iRobot doesn't exist.

1:17:41He's looking for a robot. Like, if it's like, imagine the movie. Do you ever see the movie Don't Breathe? No. It's a good movie, right? You can attest. It's the one where the kids break into a house, and then the house is, like, booby-trapped by a blind guy, and they're just trying to get out of the house. Oh, I have seen that. It's a good movie. That, but it's AI. The house is AI. The house is AI. So it's like Smart House. Remember the movie Smart House at Disney Channel Original? He had a party and then he hit the clean button and everything fell through the floor and everything was clean. I remember that vividly.

1:18:17Okay. But like imagine, or if it was like Home Alone and the robbers think that it's just a kid there but it's just like the security system. Like it's like SimpliSafe. And the stairs like eat you. And the stairs, yeah, yeah, yeah. And there's like shit like that. This is kind of genius. We don't know. Hollywood, we know you're watching. and you saw that acting performance right back there? Yeah. We're knock, knock, knocking on Hollywood's door. And I have no previous training on how to act like AI. That was just off the cuff in my heart. It was really good. That was soulless. Thank you. You were quite soulless as well.

1:18:52Because I was turning into God. You were very sinister in the way this. You give a human the ability to play God, and this is what happens. This is what happens, folks. It happens with him saying, beg, bitch. Well, there you have it, folks. Another episode of The Bass Me Art in the bag there. Don't forget to go to thebassmeart.com and go get tickets to our shows. Like we said earlier on this episode, Danny Lopiori will be opening our shows in Atlantic City, Hollywood, Florida, and fucking Las Vegas. So come through to that one. Frank, I don't know what's going on over there.

1:19:33But it feels like he said all he can say. And, folks, that is all. We'll see you guys next time. thanks for watching. Ha! Criss Angel. Mind freak.

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1:20:16King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. There's nothing like it.