In short
The hosts riff on “the greatest science question ever,” focusing on whether human construction and environmental changes meaningfully change Earth’s weight or gravity, then pivot to broader cosmic questions (universe end, intelligent life, and the odds of human existence). They also debate the Moon’s origin and end with a playful “sexiest planet” discussion.
Guests
No named guests appear in the transcript; it’s a solo/hosted conversation among the show’s regular cast (Frank, Greg, Josh, Joe, and others mentioned).
Guest backgrounds
Not provided in the transcript.
Key claims
- Earth is so massive that even billions of people jumping in one spot would not measurably shift Earth (force would be tiny relative to Earth).
- Earth’s weight fluctuates only on an immeasurably small scale, not in a way humans could affect.
- The “odds” of existing are extraordinarily rare, and having kids makes that feel even more profound.
Notable examples
- Skyscrapers: accounting for their own weight, and whether adding buildings “adds weight” to Earth.
- Burning forests: energy escapes, but mass/weight doesn’t vanish in the way they initially fear.
- “All humanity in one hemisphere” thought experiment.
- Planet “sexiness” rankings (Neptune, Earth, Saturn, etc.).
- Moon origin debate (asteroid impact vs sediment vs other theories).
Written by AI. May contain mistakes. Listen to the episode to check what was said.
Chapters
Tap a time to open that second in VOThoughts on Science and Skyscrapers
0:45 to 2:20
Discussion on the engineering of skyscrapers and their weight.
“You've never had one of those where like, you're just like, you can't crack, like figuring something out.”
The Weight of the Earth and Human Impact
2:20 to 5:06
Exploring whether human activity affects the weight of the Earth.
Materials and Weight Fluctuation
5:06 to 8:10
Debating how material use and natural processes impact Earth's weight.
Questions Around Trees and Weight
8:10 to 10:00
Discussing trees' growth and their contribution to Earth's weight.
“I guess it wouldn't be like measurable or it's probably measurable.”
Forest Fires and Weight Considerations
10:00 to 11:40
Considering the effect of forest fires on Earth's weight and ecosystem.
“That's like the thing where it's just like, what weighs more, a pound of bricks or a pound of feathers?”
The Complexity of Forest Fires
14:00 to 14:43
Discussion on the aftermath of forest fires and their impact on the environment.
“No, I mean, it does get confusing when you think about it in terms of a forest fire.”
What If Everyone Jumped?
15:13 to 17:20
A light-hearted debate about the hypothetical scenario of everyone on Earth jumping simultaneously.
“So like if you put, if you were somehow to fit all the people on the planet in a hemisphere, let's not even just say a country, like a hemisphere, would that fuck anything up?”
Planetary Beauty Pageant
17:20 to 22:17
A fun discussion ranking planets based on their appeal and characteristics.
“I mean, they can see atoms with microscopes, brother.”
Disrespecting Pluto and Planetary Personalities
22:17 to 26:10
Talk about the status of Pluto and anthropomorphizing planets in a humorous context.
“I have seen that picture in a port-a-potty before.”
Disrespecting Pluto and Planetary Personalities
29:08 to 30:08
Talk about the status of Pluto and anthropomorphizing planets in a humorous context.
“So if you would like to talk to a therapist, you can do so with BetterHelp in just under 48 hours.”
Show all 31 chapters
Disrespecting Pluto and Planetary Personalities
30:10 to 33:37
Talk about the status of Pluto and anthropomorphizing planets in a humorous context.
“Not the one that Ant tells me to tell you guys to go visit all the time.”
Disrespecting Pluto and Planetary Personalities
33:39 to 33:56
Talk about the status of Pluto and anthropomorphizing planets in a humorous context.
“Patreon.com slash TheBaseManyard, TheBaseManyard.com, and sanagatostudios.com for the new merch.”
Transition to Science Discussion
33:58 to 34:14
The hosts shift towards discussing science questions.
The Vastness of the Universe
34:15 to 35:56
The hosts reflect on the size of the universe and intelligent life.
“I mean those were some pretty pressing questions that I had You know, like the fucking universe scares the shit out of me Just as an ever expanding As an ever expanding and like the In theory We're so small So small.”
The Concept of Nothingness
35:57 to 37:00
An exploration of what nothingness means in a cosmic context.
“Like they put something down that looks like berries, but they're like floating and like triangular.”
The Implications of Being Alone
37:01 to 42:00
Discussion on the fear of being alone in the universe versus the unknown.
“And it's like, it's just this little thing.”
The Terrifying Nature of Being Alone in the Universe
42:00 to 44:12
Explore the existential dread of being alone or not in the universe.
“It's like, they're going to be like, bro, this is not fair.”
The Odds of Our Existence
44:37 to 46:59
Delve into the rarity of individual existence and the implications of decision-making.
“And then that's what I was going to say.”
The Moon's Origin and Mysteries
46:59 to 49:40
Discuss theories surrounding the moon's formation and its significance.
“It's way easier just to go like, oh, yeah, and then you crumple that up and you just toss it somewhere else.”
Understanding DNA and Its Ubiquity
49:40 to 55:06
Investigate the locations and significance of DNA within the human body.
“I think that it's like a space rock that entered orbit, and it eventually just spins around our ship.”
Exploring Science Questions
57:23 to 58:04
A lighthearted discussion on intriguing science questions and topics.
“Like I said, there's shredded pork, which I have.”
Mushrooms and DNA
58:05 to 59:16
Delving into the interesting connections between mushrooms and human DNA.
“The guy in it, when you see him, you're like, yeah.”
Defining DNA
59:17 to 1:00:44
A humorous take on defining DNA and its biological significance.
“I believe it's like dino-rubo-nucleic acid or something like that.”
Cell Structure and Anatomy
1:00:45 to 1:01:54
Discussing the components of cells and their fascinating structures.
“I was trying to find a pretty picture for you What was that?”
The World of Microbes
1:01:55 to 1:05:39
Exploring the unseen world of microbes and their omnipresence.
“That's a good one too The nucleus Just looks good dude I'd bite into this shit Like if they made That looks like a pickleball What if Dr.”
Paranormal House Discoveries
1:05:40 to 1:10:00
Imagining eerie discoveries in a new house and discussing possible reactions.
“Well, because, like, if I go like that, like, the bad ones are away, and it leaves, like, a clean spot.”
Paranormal Discussions and Ghost Tours
1:10:00 to 1:11:36
Explore the hosts' thoughts on ghosts and paranormal activities, including personal anecdotes about ghost tours.
“I'm, me and Nicole are going on like a, a road trip in the winter and we're going to Salem and not, not the time to go brother.”
College Hauntings and Urban Legends
1:11:36 to 1:13:21
Revisit college days with stories of haunted buildings and paranormal activities on campus.
“Um, but they have like a bunch of like ghost tours and shit.”
Spirit Boxes and Paranormal Equipment
1:13:21 to 1:16:54
Delve into the concept of spirit boxes and other ghost-hunting equipment, discussing their implications and oddities.
Television and the Paranormal
1:16:54 to 1:19:28
Share experiences with eerie television behaviors and the connection to ghostly activities.
“I mean, if I was in one of those situations and I heard like a voice tell me to do something, I'm doing it.”
Science Questions and Earth’s Weight
1:19:28 to 1:21:22
Engage in a light-hearted discussion about science questions, particularly the Earth's weight and smoothness comparison.
“Use the blacklight, you just see some guy there being like, I'm watching.”
Transcript
Automatic transcript. May contain errors.0:00Plan B is a backup birth control option that's there for you when things don't go according to plan. It specifically works after unprotected sex and before pregnancy occurs by temporarily delaying ovulation. Plan B is available nationwide at all major retailers and through delivery apps like DoorDash. No ID, prescription, or age requirement. It's the number one OBGYN-recommended brand of emergency contraception, and it won't impact your future fertility. That's Freedom the B. Use as directed. Welcome back to the Bay.
0:37Welcome back to the basement yard. You look very pensive over there, Frank. Yeah, I've had a bit of a tough thinking day. You ever have one of those? It's three o 'clock. You've never had one of those where like, you're just like, you can't crack, like figuring something out. And you're just like, fuck. Is it just me? Emotionally or like a, like, what do you mean? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Come on. I don't know. No, I was driving on my way in today, and I was having a thought about science.
1:13Really? I got you. It was true. I was driving, and I was on... I was having a thought about science. Well, I was... So, I'm driving... Do you ever... When you drive in Manhattan, or, like, you're in Manhattan, are you ever looking around just like, yo, what the fuck, dude? In what regard? Just like, how the fuck is this even possible? Like, the buildings? Yeah. Yeah, I look at buildings and I'm like, way too tall. Too tall, too heavy. Yeah. Which, like, I didn't even think about. Like, so first of all, it started with this. I had the realization where I was just like, when they're making these skyscrapers, they need to account for the strength of the skyscraper.
1:52Like, how much weight it is just by itself putting on itself. And then, once it's filled with shit. so like desks people pencils shit like that that doesn't freak you out how can they figure out how fucking how many people are going to be in here is this the science question oh this is a different question that's where it started and I was fucking confused and then I was like yo as we build more shit on earth does the weight of the planet change what the fuck is so funny does the weight of the planet like does our how like let's imagine our planet is like a billion tons or something yeah yeah okay hold on there's there's a good answer to this go ahead what the fuck is so funny sorry sorry i'll control but like does our does the weight of our planet change or when we concentrate our weight in one place more than others does it fucking throw shit off you mean like if everyone moved to the northern hemisphere correct is it if you put all six billion or whatever it is now eight billion or whatever amount of billion people it is yeah all in one spot i know one spot but like if you had them all standing next to each other in a combined area yeah is the earth could just be like
3:17um what's so why joe's got it well i was just gonna say that like how can the weight of the earth change if you're using things from the earth to make the building i thought that too yeah but what if there's materials that we are making ourselves which ones we're not making steel right are we i mean like it's it's not like we're making it from thin air like we're yeah like we're all the materials and resources that we're using are like well it's like ice is not going to make the water wait actually actually okay you back me up now giggles mcgee is no longer laughing me like i'm a fucking dumb fuck it's a bad question but if you think about it we plant trees and like fruit and that's bingo and that's that starts small yeah bro bingo and that gets way bro think about like let's say that yeah bro bingo the whole earth yeah yeah at the same time i just want you to know i'm not i don't have an answer i'm just working this through with okay cool the whole earth every fucking apple orchard on the planet has a full blossom of bunch of apples at the same time right that's a lot of apples brother okay is that fucking shit up because like apples don't like they get made dude like seemingly out of nothing you didn't have a point and you're taking my point but he is right i mean no my point was there i was in the point yeah i mean i i think that like um i i just think that the earth is probably so heavy that like it's minuscule a ton of trees or something isn't gonna like i mean bro a lot of or or let's let's not even say so like i understand how like evaporation condensation and rain and all that shit happens i get that yeah but like what if there is one year where it is particularly more wet and it and it adds like a lot more water than the next year does that fuck shit up well okay so the rain the rain that would come from like we're not there's not rain coming from space so the rain is actually i think a slightly worse point because that's just water being recycled from yeah it's here already yeah but is it here i know it's like it's here like water is here i know i sound like an idiot guys no no no no no this is good it's actually a good question because it got i'm thinking yeah because like the water water is but but it's in different form if it's if it's in its h2o like non-h2o form if it's the hydrogen and the oxygen and then it combines so like do does if you were to weigh out hydrogen by itself is not water i said the hydrogen and the two oxygen yeah but we're talking about water listen yeah if you were to take the weight of those things does the weight of those individual things add up to the weight of water like a water molecule the same as the weight as those the the the separate parts that i don't know but regardless those would exist on earth too yeah it's a good question but if they are heavier in one form than the other isn't their weight being made i i i don't like i think there are things that you can make heavier but i again i just think that the weight that were like a building for instance right well like steel i don't know if that's a good example because i feel like you're just taking it and forming it i i get what you're saying and i know i sound like an idiot no no no no stop i have been way dumber on this yeah yeah uh but like i understand the idea of like if you take you know molten whatever and turn it into steel it's the same amount of weight it's just elsewhere yes but it are there circumstances where like we can well you're also like what about burning like if you burn something yeah like eventually the energy flows up and out of our atmosphere if you burn something oh like a tree a tree anything well like it's regenerative regenerative like how much weight does the planet lose i think like for like a wildfire is this a Is this the question, like, does the weight of the earth fluctuate?
7:41I know, I'm sure it fluctuates to a minstrel degree, but does it fluctuate because of human intervention to a point that it could make a difference? Oh, that I don't think so. I just think it's too heavy. Yeah, whatever number I would look up, it would just give me, like, 0.0 and then, like, big numbers. I just don't think, like, buildings could possibly... Like, think about the water, just the water on earth. Yeah, dude. Like, that's so heavy that, like... anything else is not you're not going to feel the weight of that even if you put a billion people because i saw a thing that said um i believe it was my boy ngt ndt he said neil degrasse tyson got it he said like if the earth were to stop spinning for a single second it would be catastrophic because we're moving with the speed of the earth and it's like 800 miles per hour or whatever the fucking whatever it is yeah so like i'm thinking about it in that terms is Are there things that as humans we can do with our natural resources to affect the weight of the planet, the speed at which it revolves and or rotates or anything?
8:48I don't know the answer. I imagine it's no. Just because of the sheer size of it. It's very big. I guess it wouldn't be like measurable or it's probably measurable. We can't feel it. but we're probably at all times actually making the earth lighter because of like the slippage like you were saying with like making oars into steel and forest fires and like cutting down trees and making lumber like it's there's probably a lot of slippage that way but i don't think it would not heavier but oh i mean but lighter is that that does not necessarily mean it's a good thing what was the original question it's a great point can we like are we what was the question The original question was like, when we make buildings, are we making the earth heavier?
9:29Oh, right. Yeah. Which also like... I mean, I don't know the answer. To me, it feels like it would... But also not an unbelievably stupid question because things in different states do have a different weight, don't they? Things in different states? Yeah. Physical states. States of matter. Oh, oh. Gaseous. Like Ohio, they're heavier? No, no, no. Like gaseous liquid solid. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like in theory, if you have a hundred, like there's a hundred tons. I'm using it in terms of weight, but like, I know, I know, I know. Yeah. That's like the thing where it's just like, what weighs more, a pound of bricks or a pound of feathers?
10:06I'm going to be brave. The first time someone asked me that got it wrong. Yeah. Okay. I think every time I did it. It's a brick, dumbass. Yeah. They're both a hundred tons. And I'm like, don't tell anyone I said that. Yeah. Even though the answer is the same, bricks weigh more. You know what I mean? Well there's just like an insane amount Yeah so like it's bricks Like it's bricks Yeah but you get what I'm saying here Here's a question Do you think there's enough birds on earth To create a hundred tons of What is it? Feathers? A hundred tons of feathers I think there are Enough birds? Yeah brother I mean geese alone Bro go to any park and just look There's fucking 500 geese Yeah but think about how many feathers you need to get a hundred tons Yeah, but you pluck them and then they come back.
10:52That's true. Eventually. And then, bro, turkeys. Turkeys got a lot. Turkeys got tons of feathers. How much do you think? How many feathers? Like, if you took all the feathers off a turkey, how much is that way? I imagine it's got to be like a couple pounds. No way. Maybe like two, three pounds. Right? Is there any way to look that up? I'm trying to. I'm hoping that someone else did the calculation for me. Google is going to shit its pants. If you had a 20-pound turkey, if you were to de-feather it, I imagine you'll lose like a pound, pound and a half. Maybe. If that's true, then easily 100 tons.
11:28Okay, so apparently there are 27 billion chickens on the planet, right? Forget everything I said. That's one bird. That's one type of bird. That's one type of bird. And it's not even like a huge one. That's a relatively small one. A single chicken has about 8 ,000 feathers. So 27 billion times 8 ,000 is how many feathers? That's just a number that is a joke. Yeah. Yeah, and then 8 ,000 feathers weigh about 0.25 pounds. I think the math works out. 0.25 pounds? So a quarter of a pound. I think I haven't held a feather in a while. So I guess the average chicken is a quarter of a pound of feathers, I guess.
12:11But then you've got to think of, like, what's an average chicken? Are we talking like American chickens that are like cluck, motherfucker? Yeah, we got big fuckers out here. Those are the ones that are on like creatine. Yeah. And like this is my meal replacement shake and that's my grain. It's mixed in with breast milk. That's crazy. I would say like planting a seed, that's creating something from nothing, I would say, honestly. I mean, do you mean that in like a... No, he's right. I mean, but do you mean like, why are you saying that? Like an acorn or something, right? Yeah. can grow a 500 pound.
12:44Not instantly. It takes time. And the time, I imagine, and I'm just using some deduction here. Not only do things die, but like it doesn't happen instantly. Like in the time that an acorn gets to become an oak tree, it probably soaks up enough water and like the earth around it kind of becomes one with the root system and stuff like that. It's got a point with the water. But the wood wasn't there. Right. But the wood is made out of the stuff that is, like, it's eating the soil and the nutrients in the soil. So, like, it's a combination of, if you had a cup of dirt, remove the nutrients in that dirt to put it into the tree.
13:25And I guess the weight kind of still. We should have smoked. I don't know. Yeah. It sounds like we did. This is a crazy episode. Well, also, trees are dying. Like, there's trees that have fell in that time. It's not like all the trees stay up. Yeah, but just because they fall. But if they fall, the weight is still there. It's not necessarily... Yeah, but we get rid of it. Where? We burn it. We're chopping down trees every day. Yeah, but where does that go? Fucking to make this desk. I don't know. So it's still there, the weight. Wow, that's fucked up that you did that to that tree. Yeah, that's crazy.
13:57I didn't make this desk. First of all, you're in front of a desk as well. We're all in it. His is like plastic. I don't think mine's wood. No, I mean, it does get confusing when you think about it in terms of a forest fire. So, like, look at the forest fires that fucking ravaged. That disappears. That's the best thing. That's the one that confused me because think of the, not only the, like, animal life, but the just plant life that was absolutely devastated by those forest fires out in California or wherever. That energy escapes our atmosphere unless it stays in our atmosphere. But I thought.
14:30I don't think the weight of whatever was burned still remains. That would be a heavy cloud. I think the answer here that we're getting at is that it fluctuates, just not on a scale that would affect it. Plan B is a backup birth control option that's there for you when things don't go according to plan. It specifically works after unprotected sex and before pregnancy occurs by temporarily delaying ovulation. Plan B is available nationwide at all major retailers and through delivery apps like DoorDash. No ID, prescription, or age requirement. It's the number one OBGYN recommended brand of emergency contraception, and it won't impact your future fertility.
15:10That's freedom to be. Use as directed. But what about the amount of people? I really don't think so. So like if you put, if you were somehow to fit all the people on the planet in a hemisphere, let's not even just say a country, like a hemisphere, would that fuck anything up? I don't think so. If they all jump. Because I think the earth... If they all jump. And they all go... Do you think we could... If we all stood around Mount Etna, I mean... Because how much force does the average person give off? Bro, this is a crazy... Also, I just don't know if the... I mean, you give off a certain amount of force when you jump and you land.
15:55Yeah. So is the average amount of force that the average person gives off when they jump and land... If everyone did it at the same time. If everyone did it at the same time. I think that would probably be catastrophic. Is that combined force enough to fuck something up with our... I really... It's hard to say that it was. I don't think so. Eight billion people, bro. Let's say the average person weighs... But the earth, bro, it's so heavy. Let's say the average person weighs like 100 pounds. It wouldn't do anything. It just... Well, like, how heavy is the earth? Do you know? Well, I don't know if that was what you were looking at.
16:36Brother, what do you mean? You got the thing in front of you. No, no, no. There are people that asked that same question. It went viral like a while ago about if everyone was in one spot and jumped. Yeah. They said no. But it would cause a humanitarian disaster because there'd be 8 billion people in one spot. And there'd be no. Right, right. Well, yeah, of course. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying, like, in terms of, like, let's imagine that, like, no one is harming each other. Like, there's no, like, you know, purposeful damage. Just numbers-wise, someone's blowing their hamstring, their Achilles.
17:06Someone, brother. Like, probably like a couple hundred thousand people are blowing a hammy. That's kind of crazy. The downward force would shift the Earth by less than half of the width of a single atom. Immediately bouncing right back. That is half of the width. Not a thing we can see with our eyes. No, that is correct. That is insane. Not with a microscope, probably. with. I mean, they can see atoms with microscopes, brother. Well, I'm saying like a cheap one we probably can see. Oh, yeah, sorry. We're not going to be able to fucking from fucking. I'm saying you would need the Hubble telescope to see the fucking thing.
17:37And if you want a weight perspective, all of humanity weighs the Earth outweighs them by a factor of 10 trillion. So. Yo, this is a big Earth, brother. This is a fad fucking Earth. Let's go. This is a big bitch. That's what I'm saying. It's so heavy that like you would never notice the difference. I don't think there's enough skyscrapers. It's bigger than you think. Since we're here and we're talking about space, which fucks me up. Yeah. Pull up the planets. Like, pictures of them. Which one's the sexiest? Oh. I don't need pictures to know that it's... Neptune. Really? Oh, I wasn't going Neptune.
18:13Neptune's, like, mysterious and blue. I wasn't going Neptune, dude. I was going, like, honestly, like... Mercury's got something going on. Oh, my God. You're a fucking whore. Why is that a whore? Yeah, you're a whore. Let's see. Let's see. Let's see. Oh, wait. No, Mercury's... No! Go back! No! Who was that? It's just gray. I got catfished by planets. Go to... You want the same one? Pull it out! All right. Well, it was like... It's Etsy. It was like... Oh, we also don't know... Bro, look at Neptune. Mad, mysterious, and horny. Yo, honestly, you kind of got me there. But, I mean, is... All right.
18:44Do we like Jupiter? I was going to say, I don't hate Jupiter because she got a mole and she's just like, what's up? But also, would it be like... Wait, does Venus look like that? Would you question my sexuality if I said Uranus? I know it's pronounced You're a Uranus guy? Well, I'm just saying If I say Uranus Then that's gonna get clipped immediately I mean, no I mean, I'm into Uranus Bro, low-key Earth is the sexiest Earth is pretty sexy Earth is mad hot Cause she's got like She's got like a bunch going on She's like First of all She's got a ton in the Southern hemisphere If you know what I'm saying She's throwing it back Sorry What does that mean?
19:19I'm sorry She's got like a lot of like You know Juice in the caboose As they say Earth's got a fat ass. Hey, look at it. I just think it's like, it's a sexy planet. Because it's like, it's got some stuff. It's got a lot of clouds. You're kind of right about it. It's a sexy Earth. Neptune's got it a little like, it's like, yo. It's like a little like, it's got like an ombre thing going on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's like blue and it's dark. It's out there. It's out there. I do love Mars. It's like, we know it, but like, we don't fucking have any idea about it. Venus is kind of like the forgotten planet, in my opinion.
19:50Yeah, but Venus, I don't dislike Venus. Like, it's got like a... Like a... I don't know what that is at all. It's got like a spice to it. Most overrated planet. Three, two, one, Saturn. Yeah, I was gonna say, honestly. Like, we get it. You have rings, but like, bro... I mean, they're cool as fuck, dude. It's 2026, though. Don't get me wrong, but like, once I found out that the rings are not solid and it's just a bunch of rocks, I'm like, get this the fuck out of here, dude. If I can't slide on this thing, what is the point? If I can't go like this... Wait, what are they? Is it like an optical illusion?
20:22No, I, well, I don't know. I don't know. What are the fucking rings? To me, it's like a rainbow. You know what I'm saying? We need to write these questions down for if and when we ever get to talk to Neil deGrasse Tyson. Can you look up what the fuck the rings are on Saturn? It's already done. It's already done. Oh, I think it's like a dirt field, actually. That's what I'm saying. I think it's debris that's just like going around. And doesn't Saturn have like fucking a bunch of moons? Chill out, bitch. A lot of moons. Yeah, that's like cheating. We have one moon. We have one, and we're like. We're monogamous.
20:52Pretty pumped. We're monogamous with our movie. You guys are fucking people all over the place, Saturn. Polyamorous planets. Also, surrounded by dirt. Ew. Ew. You're like Pigpen, the stinkiest of the peanuts. Everyone hated that fucking dirty bastard. Clean up. Disgusting. It can vary in size here. So, like, dust grains, ice crystals, and some sand, like, boulders. But some of them are the size of houses. Some chunks. Really? I mean, what size of a house? You know, are we talking like, uh, you know, big, I mean, they got mansions out there and some are tiny. So wait, hold on. How much acreage is these rings?
21:30What's the property tax? Yeah. I need to know. I need to know. Is your cheptic? Well, what are we doing here? Yeah. I used to think that Saturn was the coolest, but then when you grow up and you find out it's just a dirty rim, Saturn just got a dirty rim. I kind of like how Jupiter's got like a Cindy Crawford thing going on. You know what I mean? Like it's got like the mole and it's just like, like if, if you were to say, what kind of hair Jupiter has. It would have like half the hair going over one of its eyes. And then it just has like a mole poking through. Well, the girl that I was in love with in pre-K had a mole.
22:00So I was all about it. So like Jupiter. I got to say, I am, I feel so disappointed in Mercury. This doesn't feel like an accurate picture. Because when I always thought about Mercury, I thought of like red. That looks like if you rip the seams off of a baseball. That's exactly, that's exactly like, I have seen that picture in a port-a-potty before. Like, it's just a gray ball of dust. Yeah, I don't like that shit at all. You know what's really fire? The sun. Well, that's not what I mean. But, like, no, it's - Find me other pictures of planets. I want to see - You know what? Google, like, if the planets were, like, the green M &M.
22:39Put on, uh, planets with tits. Which planet got the biggest tits, dude? Oh, what about this one where they're numbered? Uh, this one? Oh, my God, look. Mercury is, like, gray, dude. That's so disappointing, dude. That is really... I can't see that. I hate this. I can't see it. Oh! Earth is beautiful. Whoa, what's that Saturn? That looks like a... I think that's the shadow. The shadow of the wings. The shadow. Yeah, the shadow. Shadow of the... Dude, it's super... Superheated twin. Who? Venus, it says. Mercury is... Everyone's so obsessed with going to Mars. Elon Musk is just like, we have to. why aren't we going to Venus?
23:23It's twice as hot. But it's our super heated... There it is. Oh, hot. Extremely hot. Okay. All right. I got it. I got it. I got it. King of the planets. Do you know why they called it King of the planets? It's the biggest one. I also believe because, if I'm not mistaken, Jupiter was like... They're named after the Roman deities. Oh. So like Venus, Mars. Well, Jupiter... Jupiter, Saturn. is is misogynistic i mean that's where girls go to get stupider no boys go to jupiter to get more stupider oh so i'm not there you go there you go i tried to talk the other day uh girls go to um where do girls go i i girls go to neptune mars well if they say girls are from mars men are from Or women are from Men are from planets Oh fuck Jesus Christ What is wrong with you?
24:20Yo, this kid's the fucking worst Jumpiest fucking fuck in the world I'm sorry That scared the hell out of me I almost broke my neck He's gonna have whiplash That's insane That was terrifying Girls go to Jupiter No, boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider Girls go to college to get more knowledge That's college, not a planet But that's what the thing is No, it's If men are from Mars, women are from Venus? No, no, no. It's girls. No, I think it's Venus because it's like in retrograde or whatever. Or is that Mercury? No, Mercury is in retrograde. Girls go to... Boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider.
24:55Girls go to... I think it's college to get more knowledge. No, that doesn't make sense. It's college to get more knowledge. Girls go to Mars to get more candy bars. Grow the fuck, dude. No one says that. Hey, girls, go back to Mars. Get your Snickers. Get out of here, you geek. I don't think that's one that anyone says. Girls go to Mars to get more candy bars? There's got to be other ones. Girls come to Mars, become rock stars. Okay, this is insane. This is not it. Sweet. The one that I was familiar with is girls go to college to get more knowledge, and boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider.
25:30Knowledge, stupider. And the irony that more stupider, which I think, well, you know, the irony. It evens the... Honestly, look at Uranus. Ice giant? You're just like, whoa. It is sexy. It's a sexy color. It looks like it's got a nice color. You know, it's not awful. Neptune, though, I'm freaking horny. Well, and yo, the disrespect of Pluto. I mean, I understand just unbelievable amount of disrespect. Just an insane getting cut from the team for all these years, by the way. And like after Matt, like they gave them a jersey number and like they were on the fucking starting like five. And then they just immediately were like, you know what?
26:09Honestly, fuck you. Yeah, it's kind of foul, dude. Do we have any other... Are there, like, anthropomorphic pictures of them? Do you want me to, like, find sexy pictures of the planets? I didn't... Well, see, no, I didn't say all that. Yeah, just put in, uh, if planets were... You wrote the planet? Oh, hold up. That's probably not... If the planets were... What the hell is that purple? This isn't right. This is getting... This isn't right. This isn't right. Josh, Josh, Josh, don't put this on. This is muscular anime, like... The planets... If the planets were hot. Well, I don't know if that's...
26:44You put the planets as women and we're getting nothing. I'm trying. There's this one... Yeah, I don't think we're going to find anything. We're going to end up on a site that we shouldn't be on. There's this one game where you go around a house and you make appliances turn into people. Yeah. And then you can date them. Ah. Yeah, dude. We got to have a chat. Or real human person. That'd be great too. You ever hear about a... You ever feel the warmth of an actual one? Hear it? No. We didn't say hear. You ever hear? I'm glad we had a science talk because I often have these science thoughts and I need help with them sometimes.
27:26I think that was a very crazy way to say it, I'll be honest with you. Really? I was on my way here thinking about science questions. Greg fucking scared the shit out of me, so I need to recover from that. I almost broke my own neck because of your reaction. Well, bro, all I see is just fucking him just, like, peering an eye, a single eye across, and it scared the fuck out of me. You never seen those, like, creepypasta videos and shit where that happens? I miss that whole creepypasta. Ah, he would like some. Well, we have some sponsors for today. Let's get to them right here. The first one being Squarespace, all right?
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28:53Again, that is squarespace.com slash basement to save 10 % off of your first purchase of a website or a domain. Yeah, with that code basement, all right? We also have BetterHelp. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, which is online therapy. So if you would like to talk to a therapist, you can do so with BetterHelp in just under 48 hours. They get you hooked up and talking to a therapist. You could also, they make it very easy to jump from therapist to therapist. you have to find the right fit for you. That is very important. You have to have a therapist that you kind of vibe with and you can build some trust with.
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29:27And I've been in therapy for years and I think that it's great for everyone. So I definitely think that people, you know, should be in it. I think it's good for anyone, even if you don't feel like, you know, I feel like people have this idea that it's just for people who are going through traumatic times or are just really struggling. It doesn't have to be that at all. I mean, it definitely is helpful for things like that. But for anybody that just feels like they want some more mental clarity, I think that, you know, this is great. You can sign up and save 10 % at betterhelp.com slash basement yard.
29:58It's spelled B-E-T-T-E-R-H-E-L-P.com slash basement yard to save that 10%. Yeah, so go check it out. Betterhelp.com slash basement yard. And you know what? I got even more stuff for you. I got a ton of websites. I got a gander of websites. Not the one that Ant tells me to tell you guys to go visit all the time. I got some better ones. First one, patreon.com slash the basement yard. It's the subscription service that we use here at the basement yard and say they got a studio to support us. And it's beautiful and it's fun. You can get so much. And what do I mean by so much? Well, you check out those tiers, baby.
30:32Go look at those tiers. That first year, you get these weekly episodes one whole week in advance. That's seven whole days that you get just the basement yard, baby. And then that second tier, well, that's where you get a little juicier, a little naughty or a little crazy or a little flippant if I could be so flippant that's where you're going to get exclusive episodes every single Friday so you could start and end your week with the basement yard oh my god what even is that you get exclusive episodes and if you sign up today guess what you'll get everything that has been back cataloged on there so if you are brand new you will a hundred there's hundreds of hours hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of hours that you could take a look at stuff on there it's fun it's incredible and it's a really really good time.
31:10Okay. So go check it out at patreon.com slash the basement yard. You guys have been so unbelievably overwhelmingly supportive and kind with your time, with your money. And, and we, we appreciate it over 53 ,000 of you guys are helping us climb the leaderboards until eventually one day, hopefully fingers crossed, we become number one in the world. We'll get there maybe with your help and we thank you for it. Okay. So, uh, the holidays are coming up. I don't care what you celebrate, but you know, if you want to get someone the gift of something and they like the basement yard you want to get the basement yard for the basement yard fan in your life get them the gift of the patreon patreon.com slash the basement yard thank you guys so much we love you we appreciate you now guess what the boys are back on the road all right that might be a little secret to some of you maybe you guys have been living under a rock okay hi patrick star what's life like under that rock if you want to see if we're coming to any areas near you and if there are any you know tickets still available go to the basement yard.com go check go take a gander a lot of them are gone.
32:04Maybe some of them are still available. Maybe you want to do a trip. I don't know. It's your life. I'm not going to tell you how to live it. I am going to tell you the shows are going to be fun though. And while you're doing it, if you are coming to any of these shows, go to the basement yard.com slash submit. Okay. Just like how aunt loves to do when the cameras go off and Joe says, take your top off.
32:27What was that? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm slash submit how we did when we did our first uh series of shows we did the cards where we had people submit stories and they were crazy and we talked about them and they were outlandish and ridiculous and hysterical and they made some of the best memories at these shows we're doing something similar but it's for pictures so they're going to kind of be like out of context pictures so if you go to the basementyard.com slash submit you let us know what show you're going to be coming to you submit your picture from your camera roll you can add some context or you can't it's really whatever you want to do and maybe we'll pick it we'll talk to you about you with you it doesn't matter uh we're really excited it's going to be a ton a ton of fun so go check it out at thebasemair.com slash submit and i know what you're thinking frank can you shut the hell up already not quite yet i got one more thing to plug new merch baby that's right there is new merch at sanagatostudios.com take a look at this picture right here and i'm imagining that josh is putting up a picture next to me and it's a beautiful new merch the boys got into the studio and they modeled it and they took pictures and videos and they were playing high five.
33:33There's an X-rated version of those somewhere. I don't know where, but I imagine. Go to sanagatostudios.com. Take a look at the new merch and you're going to love it. There's stuff for everybody. There's bags. There's hats. There's sweatshirts. There's zip-ups. There's so much. So thank you so much. Patreon.com slash TheBaseManyard, TheBaseManyard.com, and sanagatostudios.com for the new merch. Check it out. Back to you. Back to you. I, that was I, that was too much talking for me I don't know That was a little too much It was a little difficult It's alright, we talked about a lot of science I'm glad we're having a science based episode I feel like we haven't had one of those in a while You got any other science questions?
34:15I mean those were some pretty pressing questions that I had You know, like the fucking universe scares the shit out of me Just as an ever expanding As an ever expanding and like the In theory We're so small So small. Do you wish you were bigger? No. I'm good with being a spec. I'm fine with the size at which I am. Like in the grand scheme. In the grand scheme. We're just a spec. Yeah, I mean, or maybe we're not. No, I think it's like well documented. Are you sure? Yeah. Are you like positive? Yeah. What if there's no other intelligent life in the cosmos? Then our spec gets bigger. I would find that insane to believe I agree but there is technically a chance what counts?
35:07intelligent life yeah but what does that mean? like they're not, I don't know they're building civilizations oh like that, okay and it doesn't need to be human life it could be animals like things that have their own language and they like have homes that they build. Oh, oh, all right. Yeah, like how birds do that. I feel like it'd be, yeah. You know what would be cool? The like food from those planets. If they were just like, we're like, we show up. You probably can't eat that? Well, you don't know. How do you know? Maybe, probably not, but maybe, hopefully maybe. I mean, we could test it at this point and be like, oh, maybe it's like a new thing that we don't like.
35:46What the hell is that? Yeah, it's just like we give them a watermelon and they're like, we can't even figure out how we would be able to eat this fucking monstrosity. I think it would be the other way around. I'm saying like them with us and us with them. Yeah. Like they put something down that looks like berries, but they're like floating and like triangular. Don't you think that if there is other intelligent life out there that they're just way beyond where we are? Like I don't think there's intelligent life that like we're ahead of. Maybe there is. I know. Because in theory, if there was intelligent life that is ahead of us, that at a certain point it's got to be behind someone has to be behind unless we're in last that would suck but we got a pretty planet yeah but like that only goes so far if space travel was like the like the safest no like better than anything never an accident ever no and you could go to a different like uh uh galaxy no you know why because I have lived 34 years on this planet not understanding like not having to grasp that reality like if i was born into a world where like that was already a thing then i'd be like yeah of course but like in my current like i am an earthly being i'm cool never having to see another planet ever yeah ever i it would be hard to imagine that it's like 100 guarantee nothing will happen like you're good but which is not it's not even possible i mean I mean maybe it is I know how they'd get Joe if they were like on Mars the Martians have figured out like you know how to go faster in a car smaller than an F1 car and what would get you there
37:35nothing because you're not open minded no I'm just scared I'm just scared I don't want to go you're scared of new things I'm scared of not being on a human planet at are you kidding me bro you're gonna tell me you don't think looking at earth would be like the most incredible thing ever didn't um fuck one of the the astronauts had said that like he had like a legit like went to the moon saw the earth and came back and it fucked with him mentally because it was just like every every human existence every problem is all right there It's all right there. And it's like, it's just this little thing.
38:19I feel like if I was able to look at Earth, I wouldn't even like really be able to conceptualize what I'm even looking at. I'd get to scream. I would like, I'd be like, if I squint real hard, I could see someone. Is that Jones Beach? I know. Yeah, exactly. You'd be like, oh, that's New York City. I think it would be jarring not just to see Earth but to see it floating in space that would be weird it would fuck me up it's suspended so that but then also this is what would fuck me up and there's just nothing but everything it just goes it just goes and that would be the part that I'd be like I can't look at this it's like let me ask you a question oh fuck do you think that like there is an end of the universe i think that they have figured out that there technically is but it is ever expanding so things can't expand if there is an end but what does that even mean so i can get to the end of it and there's just like more forming i guess you have to wait for it to render in yeah yeah exactly it's like playing it's It's like playing, you know, like a 90s video game where, like, you need, like, the buildings to, like, look like buildings as you get closer to them.
39:40Yeah, so technically they know that the entire, all of it together has a shape. It's like Minecraft. It's like Minecraft. So then if it has a shape, there's, like, parameters. Yeah, but it keeps expanding. But it does have, like. So, like, say it's like this, but it's just getting, like, this. Yeah, it's still a shape. It's just. Right, yeah. It's keeping its shape. Like, if it were to do this and then go. So, but like, I'd be like, we're fucked. I don't, and I know that we don't know the answer, but like, doesn't it stand to reason that there is something outside of that? Yeah. We don't know yet.
40:13I mean, but, but it stood to reason that there was nothing before it. So if there was nothing before it and then it is becoming something is what is the definition of nothing? If it's nothing. Something. No, nothing is not something. It's nothing. No, nothing is something. Nothing is the lack of something. The lack of something. No. Yes. Yes. Close your eyes. What's that? That's not nothing. That's something. I can't... What does nothing look like? Nothing is a... It's abstract. It is not physical. Because it's not like you can't like... You can't have something that is nothing. Nothing is the absence of something.
40:57But even that is something. No, it is not. Nothing. What it is is nothing. I guess in an abstract sense, but on a physical, material level, it is nothing. Nothing is not something. It's nothing. There is nothing which makes it nothing. People are going to be pissed at this. It's like, should we go? People are going to be upset. Open up something? But isn't that true, though? Yeah. I mean, it's too big for me. But the only reason nothing becomes something is if there is an observable thing. Sound, light, something tactile, something that our earthly senses can figure out. If there is nothing that can do any of those things, is it there?
41:47It's nothing. It's easier to believe, and I get it, that there is nothing out there. like it's just so much easier no i think it's easier but i think that we've proven that that's not i know i think we've proven enough of uh like we don't know which is scarier than proving either way you know what i mean yo it would be kind of crazy if like we really got good at space travel and we keep visiting planets and there really is nothing else and it's just us it's scary well someone said i forgot who coined it forgive me my my caps off to them like either we are alone in the universe or we are not both answers are equally as terrifying and it's fucking true dude no that equally i think i think it would be cool to be the only ones oh i think it's way scary to be the only one what do i care i think it's also scary but like you're you're not thinking that it's scary to not be alone because then you're just like cool we can learn from other civilizations other people are thinking like oh they can fuck us up yeah i think yeah don't you think that if there's a reasonable possibility that if an alien did show up and they land and we start talking and they can't communicate, we're both like, what is this about?
42:58It's like, what? It's like, they're going to be like, bro, this is not fair. Yeah. That's what it would be. Unless they've done this before. The thing that makes me believe that there probably is, is just like a numbers based like the the astronomical like odds that we are the only like yeah no the only is just it just doesn't make it's gotta be other ships flying around it's like it's like it just doesn't it's like it physically from a numbers standpoint is impossible if you're talking about physically from a numbers standpoint when you piggyback off that off of like your like your dad and mom sperm and egg meeting and you being made it's like when you piggyback the odds of the earth happening life on it and then you being here it's a number that doesn't exist oh it exists it's just incomprehensible to it so like we gave it a stupid silly name like a schmorky you know like where like the number it's like measurable it's like so many zeros that it's like a billion zeros or something plan b is a backup birth control option that's there for you when things don't go according to plan.
44:14It specifically works after unprotected sex and before pregnancy occurs by temporarily delaying ovulation. Plan B is available nationwide at all major retailers and through delivery apps like DoorDash. No ID, prescription, or age requirement. It's the number one OBGYN recommended brand of emergency contraception and it won't impact your future fertility. That's freedom to be. Use as directed. Shit like that. Yeah, I can't really imagine. And then that's what I was going to say. If Earth is the only place that has intelligent life form, then the odds of being born on that planet in an ever-expanding universe and being the sperm that met that egg, your existence is the rarest possible thing.
45:01And not only is your existence the rarest, but every decision that you have made to make you the version of yourself that you are is so, like, it's unbelievably special. Yeah, it's crazy. And that's why, you know, like, when people are just like, you are special because of this, it's like, yeah, dude. Just, like, look at it from a numbers perspective like that. Yeah, it's crazy. It's going to fucking, and again, I'll tell you this, and I know I always do this, it gets crazier once you have kids. Because I look at my three children and I'm just like, The odds. How is it that I've, the odds that you are you and I am me to you and you are like, it fucking, it, it.
45:46Imagine trying to explain that to your daughter. Like I am the you of me and you are of mine. You are of mine of the universe. And like the fact that we have gotten to you and me in the same time is crazy. Crazy. I'm going to crack something open. I need to, I'll be honest with you. If I ever needed a drink on this episode, it's right now because this fucks with me. Yeah. Doesn't it? Yeah. It's like hard to comprehend, but it's not really scary. If anything, it makes me feel happier in my existence. It's so rare that you'd be able to do this. Yes. You know what I mean? But also, it doesn't scare me.
46:34It's just like, it's so difficult to wrap my Terran mind around. Terran? Yeah. What's that mean? Terra. That's like the name, like the, I don't know if it's Latin or what, but that's like the name of Earth. Terra. Oh. It's also what they call us in Gardens of the Galaxy. Yeah, so what? How about that? How about so what? You got an issue with it? No. No, I don't. My Terra mind. Yeah, no. Gosh, what a crazy. Shout out to the planets. What a crazy thing, dude. It's way easier just to go like, oh, yeah, and then you crumple that up and you just toss it somewhere else. All right. I still would like to fuck Neptune.
47:12Of all the planets. Of all the planets. Yeah. Who would have the most annoying people from that planet?
47:22That's a good question. I mean, I think Saturn. Oh, I wasn't even going to say Saturn. I think just like, you know. Isn't Jupiter the biggest? I feel like it would be Jupiter because they're just like, we're the biggest, dude. Yeah, but Saturn has like... Saturn's like bougie. You think? I think so. The ring? All those moons and the rings and like... Doesn't Jupiter have the most moons? I don't know, probably. Who's got all those moons? I don't know, they all do. They all got a lot of moons. They got like 70... Why don't they get one? This is bullshit. Do we have one? I hope we don't have more.
47:52Nah, we got one. Oh, you're gonna upset the moon? No, I'd be embarrassed of my lack of moon knowledge. To my understanding, we have un-moon and I'm fine with that. We can see this shit. Like, it's almost better to have just one. Yeah. Because then, like, oh, yeah, name all your moons, you know? I don't need that. It's just way too many. You know, just have one beautiful moon that you love, that loves you, and things are going well. Yeah. You know, keep a small circle of moons.
48:24You feel differently, don't you? No. It makes sense. What I'm thinking about now is like if we're still in space is like, okay. The moon was created because a big asteroid hit the earth. What's up? The moon was created because a big asteroid hit the earth. A chunk went up there at the moon. Boom. That's what happened. What? I don't know. Wait. What do you think the moon is? It's like an asteroid hit the earth and a chunk of the earth went up and that's what made the moon. That's what you're saying. So this is the topic of contention here on the episode. You think that. Is that not what it is? I don't.
49:03I don't know. He thought it was the Grand Canyon. I thought it was the Grand Canyon. What? Like, the asteroid hit the Earth and the Grand Canyon, what we know as the Grand Canyon, went into the air and it's now our moon. That was years ago, by the way. I don't currently think that. I'm just like... Well, I mean, that's not very different than what I said. No, it's not. And that's why I'm, again, like, what part of the Earth do you think that... Oh, I don't know. But wouldn't we see a giant hole the size of the moon? I think it's a collection of sediment. Where'd the moon come from? I think it's a collection.
49:37Bro, I don't know. There's endless options. Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys. I think it's a collection of sediment.
49:46Guys, guys, guys. I don't think it's just like... I think that it's like a space rock that entered orbit, and it eventually just spins around our ship. And it became like a perfect sphere? Yeah. I mean, I don't even know if it is. Yeah. I don't know about that. Where are my moon truthers out there? Wait. I mean, when you said it was the Grand Canyon, you basically are saying that. That was years ago that I had a dumb opinion like that. Now I got to. Now you're going to look it up because you don't trust his looking up skills? Well, it's, it's, there's a lot of theories. I didn't realize it was theories.
50:23Oh, see? A lot of people would say it's fake, by the way. Made a cheat. So I think, like, what you're thinking of, because this is what it says that, like, something hit Earth. Yeah. But that thing, part of that, not, like, a piece of Earth. So it's like it's space rock. That's weird that that could just happen. A proto-planet called Thea? Yeah, I saw that. smashed into the early earth in a massive impact. And then whoosh happened, right? That sound, I imagine. You know what's even crazier? Forget about what it actually is. The fact that we could say, like, I think it's this. That's fucking crazy.
51:02Yeah, I don't know. Scientists are just like, you know, how do you apply for a job to be like, you need to help us figure out what the fuck that thing is up there? You know what I mean? Yeah. Help us figure out the fucking moon. You're just like thinking of stuff, and you're like, by the way, fuck is that? By the way, hey, what are you doing for work today? Figuring out the moon. Have your kids ever asked you what the moon is? I don't think so. The only person, like, whenever they see the moon, they get very excited. Yeah. But I don't think they've ever really asked. Like, what is that? I'll be very honest with you.
51:33I'm unsure what you would say. I don't know what I would say. It's a, well, it's not a planet. It's like a collection of sediment. Have they actually, sediment to your daughter, are hilarious what uh have they ever asked like space questions miles used to ask them all miles would ask crazy shit and i wouldn't even be able to he'd be like what is space there was one time where becca was on a car ride with him and he was just quiet and and he goes where is dna brother and like becca was just like it's time to go to school you know what i mean like how do you answer that where is it somewhere i believe it's everywhere you know i mean but i'm saying like is there a spot where it is like oh it's in the bone marrow uh there is an answer spinal fluid sure or is it in your blood it's got to be in your blood i imagine it's in your blood yeah it's in parts of your hair so it's in the follicle but it's not so it's your whole body but not because it's not if you were to cut a piece of my hair off there's no dna in there wait isn't there i think in the follicle, there's DNA.
52:41So, like, you ever pull a piece of hair out and you see a little white ball on the end of it? Yeah, yeah. That's the DNA in there. But why would they... Wait. It's... No, no, no. Don't give us an answer. Okay. Is it somewhere, though? Yeah, of course it's somewhere, dummy. It's somewhere. No, no, no. I mean, like, a specific one place. It's, like, in your spine. And then it goes out to everything else. Well, I just... This is my question. Imagine your DNA and your job is to, like, go into semen like hey did you get hey dna did you get a placement where is it what is it called with like it's like i'm in the nuts yeah like what is it called where uh you know like people go out missions not missions but like where they're stationed oh okay it's like yo i got my station where yo i got tits i got tits and you're like yo i'm in the nuts i'm in the semen this sucks Oh, dude, that sucks.
53:35I'm in the teeth. It's like, you're not going to last long in there, brother. Is there not DNA? I mean, DNA is in the blood. But is there, I mean, isn't it? I think that there is DNA. Is it blood or is it more specific than blood? Do you want me to start giving hints? Yeah. So that's wrong. It's okay. Well, the answer is yes. It's in the blood. It's in everything. Well, the answer is yes. It's in everything. It's all part of it. The answer is also yes. The answer is. So like, if I had dandruff, that's DNA. Ooh. That's a good question because it is Dead skin Dead skin? Is it dead? DNA is found inside almost every cell in the human body It's everything It's everything So it's in I mean you are getting stationed So yeah Some people end up in the finger and the other are in your asshole Like yo DNA congrats brother Where are you going?
54:22It's like I'm going into human fecal matter Yeah I am literally in the ass of this guy What about you? And it's like I'm in the ear You know That's whack too I guess skin Skin's a good one That's like the best. That's like when people get stationed in skin, they're like, really? Now that we can now bless with this new information, that DNA is absolutely everywhere. Every part of the cell. How does anyone get away with a crime? How is that possible? Yeah, that's a great question. That's insane. Because I mean, one of the I forgot the name of it, but there's like a like a rule. Contact tracing is like everything like you.
54:57Anytime you commit a crime or go somewhere, you leave a part of yourself behind. physically and emotionally. So we're everywhere. We're everywhere. We're everywhere, baby. Um, we do have some more sponsors to get to here. Uh, we have a sponsor on this episode. Uh, yeah, I don't know what's going on here, but we do have, we have skims skims makes, uh, underwear. Uh, there's underwear for women, underwear for men. Uh, I think I'm actually wearing a pair of skims underwear at the moment, but send us a little care package. They're very, uh, comfortable, uh, boxer briefs. They are like stretch boxer briefs and they're very breathable, not too tight around your waist and they're like luxurious you know they don't rip they don't fall apart or anything i've had some for a while now they stand the test of time or the tent on the whatever it does um but yeah they're great and uh you can shop the best underwear for men and women at skims.com let them know that we sent you if you're going to go buy something after you place your order select podcast in the survey and select our show in the drop down menu that follows okay so that's just that skims.com these are great gifts for people also if you just want to level up your underwear game and get something a little bit more luxurious for a good price point, head on over to skims.com and again, let them know that we sent you over there.
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57:06That's code basement50off at factormeals.com. Again, basement50off is the code at factormeals.com. See website for more details. But yeah, Factor, it's great. I've ordered some stuff from them before and, you know, it's good. It's not just like plain stuff, too. Like I said, there's shredded pork, which I have. It's unbelievable. So go check them out and enjoy that as well. Glad that we're doing this such a big science episode. It's been a while. It's been a while since I've talked about science. To be fair, these are science questions that we're not going to get in our daily. Like, we're not going to get answers in our daily life.
57:45You need to seek these things out. Yeah. Yeah. Bro, you need to watch the documentary I watched on mushrooms. Becca watched it, and she was, like, blown away. It's crazy. You're like, oh, my God, our entire earth. Fantastic fungi, right? Yeah, something like that. Or a fungi, as they say it sometimes. Do they? I don't care. The guy in it, when you see him, you're like, yeah. That's a mushroom guy? Yeah. Yeah. He's got, like, a hat, and you're like, what is that? I've always enjoyed mushrooms. There's a place that we, like, we went to a farmer's market once, and they have, like, they do, like, their own, like, mushrooms, and they do, like, prepackage, and it's like, you get lion's mane.
58:22you get fucking uh cordyceps which i was like oh yeah chill with that i was like oh um you know a bunch of shit like that but mushrooms are fucking crazy because guess what we become one eventually right in some capacity like i don't is wasn't there a thing that was like we share dna with mushrooms i just found out where my dna was i thought i saw something that's like we share dna with mushrooms and then like we also share dna with bananas i'll try i'll try i don't know do we share dna with bananas do don't put we put humans right well you gotta specify because you know bananas share roughly 50 to 60 percent of a gene level similarity with humans what's that about dr mike is screaming at his screen right now i don't even know what that means we're part of the yeah i don't care either like i just heard 50 to 60 and i was like we're 50 banana yeah oh my god i'm 50 banana that's how misinformation starts what about it's because of like the protein and dna makeup it's more like the model so like what makes i can't do this yeah it's like i i would need to go i would need to be more in depth and i don't feel like it would help anything yeah i think it would just throw us do you remember what dna stands for Yeah.
59:47No. I believe it's like dino-rubo-nucleic acid or something like that. Or dino-rubo-nucleic acid? Dino? Am I right? No, that's for dinosaurs. You want to try it? It's D-O. D-O. Sorry. Okay. D-O-rubo-nucleic acid. I'll put it up. You guys try to read it. Okay. Oh, it's that bad? No, but let's get it. A stands for, well, that's not what you, well, you're not off. Yeah. Deoxyneo. Is that an R? Deoxyribonucleic? Brother, you know I can't read that. You need to zoom and enhance, computer. Enhance. Computer, enhance. Deoxyribonucleic acid. Deoxyribonucleic acid. That was great. I crushed that. Yeah, you did.
1:00:36You're a scientist. Crush that. You messed up on the acid a little bit. It's a long molecule in your cells. I don't even know what that means I will say the shape of DNA Fire Dude Love that Do you remember when we would like learn Like the body parts of a cell Like the mitochondria Those shit look That shit look delicious What mitochondria You don't remember it would be like It was like that cross section No no no no DNA we get it We've seen Jurassic Park Oh you wanna do the cell Look up like the anatomy of a cell Hell yeah You're gonna tell me You saw this and you were just like Yo, that does look amazing Oh Yeah, it looks like a Like a Wonderball Like, yeah It looks like a jawbreaker Brother, get off of Walmart.com Who that shops at Walmart Is buying it?
1:01:26I was trying to find a pretty picture for you What was that? I don't know Oh, there it is What are they selling? Yeah All this is in there? Yeah Look at the mitochondria So sick Cytoplasm What was the powerhouse of the cell again? The mitochondria It was the mitochondria Yeah Cytoplasm I don't know what that is, but that shit is fire, too. Yo, a nuclear pore. A Golgi apparatus? Golgi, I think it is. Well. I think it's Golgi. Peroxym. Dude, that's everywhere in all of our things. Ribosomes. Isn't that like in cereal? It's riboflavin or whatever. Riboflavor? Riboflavin? Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, yeah.
1:02:01Oh, yeah. People are screaming about that. The nuclear envelope? Psyllium. We got one of those out here. That one I've heard of, psyllium. Lysosome? That's a good one too The nucleus Just looks good dude I'd bite into this shit Like if they made That looks like a pickleball What if Dr. Mike If you're watching and listening This is for you for free by the way We can get in on this He'll give us a cut of the royalties What if you make like Science Cereal He's Like I feel like this is a different science He's a fucking family doctor He doesn't deal with cells all day It's funny But like What if they started making Like Do you remember when they made Like the plushies That were STDs What?
1:02:48You've never seen those? No Like they made a plushie That was like They made a plushie Chlamydia This is chlamydia This is gonorrhea And what did they look like? They look They had like little smiley faces And shit on them And they were used Oh it was just like people? No They were like little like germs And they were used for like Teaching purposes But what if they did that But for like cereal Hmm? made... Wait, what are you talking about? Made what? Dolls for cereal? No, no, no. Like cereal, but of the powerhouse of the cell. So they're called like cellios. We can work on the name. That's not the part.
1:03:22So you're saying like each one is like a big ball that's filled with a bunch of shit. Yeah, like the bowl is the cell. And then like the cereal itself is like, oh, there goes the ribosome. Yeah, you don't remember these? These are the STD plushies? Yeah. All right, who's who? It's a good question. I'm trying to find it. Tainted love. What a name. Tainted love? Oh, here we go. Okay. So herpes, syphilis, chlamydia. Oh, I would have thought the green one was gonorrhea. Got me there. So they would use these for like - Educational. Yeah, yeah. They'd be like, this little cutie doesn't look so cute once you got it on your balls.
1:04:01Well. What does this help? Like, what did I'm not going to - I think that it's probably to, you know, make people feel better about STDs. The clap? That's crazy. What is the pox? I think that's, we just saw that. That was syphilis? Syphilis, yeah. I've never heard of the pox. Yeah, I've never heard of that either, to be honest with you. Herpes looks cool. Like a little, like an egg or something, like an egg star. I can't read any of this shit. Yeah, it's too small. I was just saying. I think this is too, what's it called? I was going to say decriminalize, but that's not what I meant. No, that ain't it.
1:04:41To make it more socially acceptable. These are STDs. It's fine. Everything's okay. They also made them for like, this is what the common cold looks like and stuff like that. I guess that makes a little bit more sense. I do like looking at that type of shit. Oh, germs? Shit under microscopes is so fire to me. When's the last time you looked through a microscope? Rarely has. Or a telescope? A telescope? It's been a long time. Been a minute? I mean, I definitely have looked through a telescope more recently than I have looked through a microscope. Microscopes are crazy because you're just like, that's fucking everywhere.
1:05:17Yeah, like, this shit is moving. That shit is everywhere, brother. Like, here there's a ton of shit. And, like, if you had the ability to, like, see it as the germs, like, crawling and shit like that, you, Mr. Creepy Crawly guy, you don't like it, you wouldn't be able to touch anything ever again. Am I killing things by doing this? I would like to think so. Why? Wishful thinking. You want to be able to kill? Well, because, like, if I go like that, like, the bad ones are away, and it leaves, like, a clean spot. I know that's not how it works, but I wish. You know? Can we kill? I think my head hurts.
1:05:56Can we kill cells? Yeah, of course. There's dead cells. But like, can I, am I killing him? Is he a murderer? Am I a murderer? Is he a criminal like your dad? What do I look up? Dude, like, it's impossible. I don't know, bro. Does hitting a desk kill the cells? Can you, if I slap a surface, does it kill cells? Yes, I like that. I like that one right there. There's no way anyone has ever typed that into Google. I think you might Google something for the first time ever. Oh, it doesn't. We're safe. They've got tough walls. My slapping fails to kill cells. I thought I said slapping walls. Do you ever try to crush an ant?
1:06:37Sometimes, even when you step on it, it doesn't really work because they're too tiny. That's a great point. They get in the crevices of our hand. They could probably find their way within the ridges of our... They're in your fingerprints. Yeah, now, if anything, I've just completely opened myself up to an attack. A biochemical attack. When you really think about it, you're just crawling with things. Things are just all over us. There are TikTok accounts that just show you hyper close-up images. Of shit? And they fucking ruin my day. I actually like that. What I don't like is the heat map shit.
1:07:11I can't. Heat map? It's like they show when you flush a toilet. It looks like a fucking volcano erupts. It gets all over your toothbrush. I'm like, guys, I don't. Or like black light. I was going to say, would you ever just take a black light and go into your bathroom and, like, shut the lights and see what it looks like? I mean, we have a lovely cleaner that helps do a deep clean. Yes, and I'm sure they do a good job. But I'm sure there's some spots that look like people are killing. But let's say, all right, how often does your cleaner come? Probably, like, once every two or three weeks. Okay.
1:07:45Whatever is the middle time where it's, like, they have not been there the longest. The day before they come. Sure. The day before they come. This probably looks like a murder scene. Go in there and just, like, maybe do that and see what happens. See what happens. I'll just do my whole apartment and just see, like, yo, what's going on? Well, we don't need to do all that. We're just, you know. Dude, what about you? Because you just moved into a new house. If you do that, like, in your basement, you're like, yo, there's, like, a big spot right here. Oh, I'm afraid of that. It's like, yo, there was a.
1:08:15We got the house cleaned before we moved in, and I was like. Can't clean blood. Yes, you can. Yeah, you can. Bleach, brother. You absolutely can. But they didn't. Or what if, like, it was, like, a random spot on the walls or the ceiling? And you're like, yo, what's that? It's just, like, a body, just like that or something like that? I mean, I'm calling cops. Or there's a, there's a, there's a, it's written. Don't fucking do that, please. It's a secret. Please stop. Please stop. It's like, you found it. Now get out. No, yeah. Yo, I would leave. Or you hold it up and it's just, like, a drawing of two eyes.
1:08:48Nah, that wouldn't fuck me up as much. Or, like, if I, if I held it up and there was just, like, a map. A map of like the house and like an X over one room. Truthfully, like be as honest as possible. If you took a black light into your basement or whatever, and there was a message written on the wall and it said, get out. What would you do? You're not going to sell your house. I'm letting you know right now. I am saying nothing, but I am fully manipulating Becca and to get someone in there to pray over the house or some shit. oh you would go right to spirits i mean like i would just be like this is out of my this is out of my league i can't do it like you would get an exorcist i just feel like that would be like the first place to go i mean it depends like truly truly truly though joking aside i would probably call the cops and say what i would just be like listen this is what i found i don't know what this was written in yeah send someone down here to test this shit because like who knows what cold case that could possibly solve would you text the old owners and be like yo did you guys put a message no no no no because then if they find it then they're like you have found it the game is on tick tock and i'm like no do you take the wall down like what do you do uh yeah i mean i'll be honest with you so what if this it's an arrow stop trying to fucking scare me joey please this isn't gonna happen but if there's an arrow to a certain spot in the wall and it's like yeah would you like the yeah we gotta open the wall well i'm i'm i'll be honest with you we are currently in the process of getting our basement redone oh baby so like i kind of will hope to only remember what you're telling me to do after it's already done just be like oh oops yeah oh no i don't have no idea what you're talking about actually what happened but if you paint over it because like we painted like our room and stuff like that yeah will it go away really depends what they used a latex based paint well if it's a demon it doesn't matter oh yeah they're gonna find their way they're writing messages but if i'm a demon i'm not writing a message that you can't find yeah it's going on the bathroom mirror yeah black lights are like out yeah who the hell still has a black light yeah that's like anytime i hear in the news that like someone got in trouble for a laser pointer i'm just like it's 2026 yeah who the hell still has one it's like dying in a lava lamp accident what are we doing what year is it over there you died by pog i you know like but That still happens?
1:11:17Died by Pog. I'm, me and Nicole are going on like a, a road trip in the winter and we're going to Salem and not, not the time to go brother. Go during Halloween. That's when we're going. Oh, you said the winter. Did I say that? Yes. Oh, I just spent like a round. Yeah. It was like, it's in October. Um, but they have like a bunch of like ghost tours and shit. There are places in Jersey that have that. She's super into it. And I'm just like, brother, Bring one back with you. Like, I'm going to have to do it, but the entire time, I'm just going to be thinking about the I think you should leave sketch.
1:11:51Yeah. Yo, they must get that all the time. I imagine they do. These fuckers blast out of the wall. This is their giant fucking box. Have a horse cock? I feel like, yo. There's a place in a town called Asbury Park. They do like a big, it's like a big thing for them. They do paranormal tours. And not for me. She found one where it's like you like have a device. I'm like, bro, I'm not going to be devising. I knew people that did that on my college campus. So there was like one building on my college campus that people claimed was haunted. It was like it was the oldest building on campus and it was.
1:12:32But like people lived in it? No. So it was used for offices. Okay. But it was the oldest building on campus and reportedly it was an orphanage before it became a college. That's not good. And they would do like, they'd call them hunts. So they would go in at like midnight and stay there until 3 a.m. And they'd have their thing. They would have the thing that like took a flash picture and like lit up. Super fucked at. I'm not about it. Super fucked at. Not about it, brother. I will say there was one time where I thought I saw someone. But like it was during the day. So I was just like, it probably was just someone.
1:13:10Wait, like in the building? Yeah. and no one's in there like it was like there was no one around like it was one of those buildings where like if someone was walking by you heard them because it was all old wooden floors and shit like that and it was just like what was that oh man i don't like that because of people because of what the building was and it's it's it's reputation people just immediately thought like it's a ghost it's always like orphanages or like an insane uh like an insane asylum yeah yeah yeah there were a bunch of those that remember it was like a rite of passage we said this not long ago like it was like a thing on long island where it was like are you going to the the square manor and it was like an old and insane asylum definitely wouldn't do that honestly well because they are probably used as like encampment for the unhoused in minecraft just want to make sure we're covering all our bases there wow that was unbelievably unbelievably safe i don't want to offend
1:14:10oh so there's like a bunch of people like live in there i believe that's the case so that would be that would explain the uh that would explain the noises if i'm living in an old hospital yeah and there's kids coming in there and they want a thrill i'm giving it to hell yeah brother oh get out you know like of course you're gonna do it you know like i'll just start whispering around corners and shit like that yeah oh man there's one guy on tiktok who will go into uh like those areas but he'll play like kesha yes oh i've seen that he's just like showing them timber for the first time i hear your heart yeah and it's just like all right spirits this is kesha timber boom boom that shit's funny i'm going yeah yeah no so yeah i guess i'm doing a ghost tour and i'm gonna be are you gonna be like are you gonna fully give yourself into it or are you just gonna be like skeptic just so you don't get scared i'm gonna do it for her and i'm gonna be bought in for me like i'm gonna be like all right so this is this is it so you'll show physically show up for her but mentally show up for yourself because now it's like if i'm showing up then like okay let's get something out of this gotcha because i can't you know like it'd be good to be like if i come back and be like bro yeah i my device was going crazy there was a picture i had someone's trometer is that what they call it or what's that i don't even know i think it was something with an acronym ekg no definitely not you sure isn't the ekg for your it's for your heart ah yeah what's it called i mean i know like the ghostbusters stuff no i have no idea emf that's right yeah which stands for it's an electronic magnetic field force yeah you gotta is a spirit box.
1:16:01Oh. Is that like a... It's like... It's... No, it's the thing where it picks up signals but it gives like random words out sometimes. You ever see those? Yeah, it'll be like soup. Yeah. And then it'll be like... You hungry? It's like, did you like soup? And they're like, yes, sometimes. Yeah, yeah. Yo, pull up one of those TikToks, please. Wait, they're fucking... They're not even this. They creep me out. I don't know, brother. The spirit, it's a spirit box? It'll be like a soup. It's random, like... Dude, sometimes on TikTok I'll find myself watching people like spirit box hunting in like the woods at night.
1:16:33And I'll be like, and random, and it's random words sometimes. And I'll just be like, run. It's like, yo. Yeah. Bro, you know what would happen to me? Yo, if I heard a run, not only am I running, but if I fall down, I'm just digging as deep as I can. Just in the ground. Yeah, like, I just gotta get away, I guess. Just like, no! Yeah, yeah. Oh my God. I mean, if I was in one of those situations and I heard like a voice tell me to do something, I'm doing it. Like, run, get out, leave. Like, you ever... I'd be like, where? Which way? Which way? I'll go right now. Tell me how quick you want me to leave.
1:17:08Yeah. It's like, sometimes people bring it while they're cleaning graves. You ever see those people sometimes? Like, they're like... Yes, I've seen, like, they'll, like, scrub them, but they'll leave it there. And it'll just be like, thank you. Yeah. Fuck off. Bro, it's weird. I'm telling... I mean, I'm not saying it's real. It's called a spirit box. I don't know. Look it up, brother. Find it. The internet. Well, I'm saying... I could buy one. Like videos of it would be weird Bro let's put one in here During an episode Frank stop Yo let's do that During an episode No no Not this Yeah so it's like This little thing And it'll like Say phrases on frequencies Right so it's like random Bro you would fuck with this Nah nah nah You know me I'm a bitch That's what I'm saying You're saying get in here Like you're bugging Do it on an episode Where I After I die I feel like Like yeah I'm here with Joe Sett It's me Joe Settigata Welcome back to the And Frank And I'm just like Hi Yeah can you please pull up a tiktok of it happening it's not really like i don't i don't it's not visual it wouldn't also i don't even know where i would keep something like this like i just don't want it around me like can you imagine it was like off and in the corner of your house and you just hear like i'm hungry yeah well that's when you take the batteries out of it brother i i imagine it operates on some form yeah but what if it it you know you ever when was the last time you saw a tv with just static oh i couldn't tell you someone told me one time that their tv would turn on and do that and i was like i would literally kick my tv in the face well there was a thing that there was one morning recently where like i woke up like super super early and i heard like and i was like i i was like holy fuck like it my heart dropped and i went in the basement and the tv was on oh but what happens with the tv that we have is if you leave it idle for too long it's like this like thing where like samsung has channels now it'll be like watch the fucking baywatch channel like you're you're a tv samsung just be a tv be a tv but like if it's on like input one and it's just like it's left to idle it'll just immediately changed to that.
1:19:14Okay. And that's what I've told myself. Got it. So. But there could be a spirit down there writing messages on the wall. Watching Baywatch. Watching Baywatch. You just use the blacklight and it's just like, CJ was hot. You know? Use the blacklight, you just see some guy there being like, I'm watching. You see this episode show? CJ gets bit by a jellyfish. Bit by a jellyfish. Oh, man. Well, space, ghosts What happened here? It is what it is, folks What? It's just funny because I'm not going to say I was going to say We wanted to talk about certain things And we just didn't No, no, no I don't even remember how we got to the beginning of this My science question Are we affecting the Earth's weight?
1:20:06Which we are certainly not It's quite heavy You ever see the thing where it was like NDT said he's like if you took the earth with all its peaks and valleys and everything and you made it into the size of a pool ball it would be smoother than a cue ball
1:20:22which I struggle to think
1:20:27maybe NDT's a little bit full of butt maybe he's a maybe he's full of butt maybe he doesn't know maybe he's like does anyone actually like confirm that he's a scientist yet okay I think his degree Which he told us about it Have we seen it? I haven't seen the paper Have you seen the Earth Round? Have you seen NDT's degree? He typed in Yes he's an astrophysicist and scientist Well a bachelor of science So technically him and I started at the same spot Right I think we all do that Well no some people get bachelors of arts some of us don't get anything at all that's not what i meant but yeah um but yeah i guess that is our episode for today interesting one hope you guys learned a lot we sure didn't oh yeah we were sure told we we eventually got there um but we had some questions is what it is uh frank where can they find you uh the frank alvarez everywhere uh looking up science stuff everywhere the countdown to Avengers Doomsday podcast on Disney Plus and patreon.com slash the basement yard and just cut me off feel free to just stop me before asking questions Ant Prisco on TikTok and Instagram and you guys can go follow me at Joe Santagallo go follow the show at basement yard on TikTok and Instagram that is all, see you guys next time
1:22:07Thank you.
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