#538 - Meet Us At The Bowling Alley

7:26Frank Alvarez:I mean I think they oh when I was in Switzerland I got a massage and I was fighting for my life what were they doing massaging my feet really and I was trying desperately

7:38Joe Santagato:not to like that's one of the things I think I guess I missed the tickling thing I'm not ticklish.

7:44Frank Alvarez:I'm very ticklish. I'm only ticklish like on my side. Ooh. Right here, ticklish. Really? And my feet like at a, you know. I also am more like anticipatory ticklish. I will say that I get with my neck. Like if I'm coming over there and I'm like, I'm going to tick my neck.

8:01Joe Santagato:Yeah, it's not that it's going to tickle me, but I just don't like it. You know, like, get back up.

8:04Frank Alvarez:Get out of there. You know, get out of here. Get out of here.

8:06Joe Santagato:You know.

8:07Frank Alvarez:And then once you get a little ticklish, you're like, get out. And now I'm like, I turn into like an ogre. You know what I mean?

8:12Joe Santagato:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I've seen videos of people doing when my girlfriend gets overstimulated very quickly, and they're tickling, and she's like, ha-ha, get off me! Yeah, I'm like that. I'm like that. Really?

8:25Frank Alvarez:My dad used to tickle me, and then while I was laughing, he would just say, fight it, fight it, fight it, and then one day, it wasn't ticklish anymore. What? Your dad? Your dad would condition you out of being ticklish? Yeah. Your dad would tickle you and say, fight it? Yep.

8:37Joe Santagato:Good old yellow. Yep. Wait, hold on. What else has he taught you? What was the issue with being ticklish, according to your father? I don't know. Maybe it was like a, you know, a weakness. A masculinity thing. In fighting. Yeah, you know, the popular fighting technique of tickling.

8:50Frank Alvarez:Like if me and Joe are wrestling, give him a tickle. You know what? You could get me, though. See? Hold on. If you have a business idea, I'm going to kill myself.

8:59Joe Santagato:Business idea. It's like the MMA, but it's tickling.

9:05Frank Alvarez:I have a site for you, Frankie. It already exists.

9:07Joe Santagato:Really? Like professional tickling? You have a site for him?

9:09Frank Alvarez:A professional ticklingly? I could send it to you later. I mean I don't want any sites from you Oh you should pay money for the documentary that I paid for It was ticklish but it's like sexual

9:17Joe Santagato:You told me about it? Yeah Don't need to pay money for it No it's interesting But like it's like a fighting league It's like a competition I mean think about it We got the professional slap league What's that one called? Power slap Power slap Yeah We got power slap We got MMA Something a little less detrimental on the good old brain health How about a professional tickling league?

9:40Frank Alvarez:Do you think that there's ever been a torture session where they tickled some information out of somebody? You know what I'm saying? I'm sure there has.

9:49Joe Santagato:You know what I mean? I'm sure there has. But I'm thinking about it, back to my idea, where you set people up and kind of ask to... You know how in order to not be gay with your boy, you guys sleep ass to feet?

10:04Frank Alvarez:So I'm staring at his fucking dog.

10:06Joe Santagato:But, like, you guys lay in a situation like that, and you both grab onto a foot, and you just tickle until one person gives up. And then they have to say – they don't say, uncle. They say, I'm too ticklish. Yeah.

10:20Frank Alvarez:And that's how they lose. Now, is this an idea or a fantasy? Because those –

10:26Joe Santagato:I mean, aren't all ideas, fantasies to some degree?

10:31Frank Alvarez:It sounds like you participated.

10:33Joe Santagato:Yeah. In what?

10:34Frank Alvarez:In the –

10:35Joe Santagato:Professional tickling?

10:35Frank Alvarez:In the ass-to-foot, face-to-foot tickling sleepover? You ever sleep? Oh, no, no, no. I'm not saying that the tickling. Have we ever slept foot-to-face? I'm sure we have. Have you done that with your boys? No, I think we go just face-to-face, I think.

10:49Joe Santagato:Whoa, dude. See that? Now that, you're inviting energy. Also, I'm a cuddler, so sometimes I'll, I've accidentally grabbed a boy. I've slept, like, in a bed with, like, a friend or something, and we just turn the other way.

11:03Frank Alvarez:Yeah. You know? Yeah, I've done that mad time. but I've also woken up and I'm like staring at fucking like Espo in the face and we're just like well no you don't stare at him in the face because he sleeps like Dracula that's true yeah Espo does look like he sleeps like this every wake that I've ever been to that's how we sleep this is why on vacations I choose to room with Espo

11:26Joe Santagato:because he just doesn't move he sleeps he takes up the only amount of space he takes up is like the width of his body yeah that's it and he doesn't move he doesn't make a sound and not like you think that this is a joke he sleeps like this yeah he sleeps like a dad watching his kids like soccer game he's he sleeps like someone that is so upset at the ending of like harry potter dude you know just like i don't like that i don't like it i don't like it at all uh but where were we i have no idea i'm not a tickler i don't i don't like i'm not i don't get

11:59Frank Alvarez:tickled that's the shocking like that you wouldn't like you'd be like to me you strike me as a tickler i mean when i play with my kids i tickle yeah i mean i would honestly say that 40 of my interactions with my nieces and nephews are tickling well the tickle monster is is a monster as old as time i'm shocked hold on new business idea you need to figure out a way to get ideas across on this show without making it a business all right two business ideas how does that answer

12:30Joe Santagato:one is an elevated horror movie we've had a lot of those over the last couple years now i'm in now he's in in the vein of like skidmer rank uh uh uh you know weapons you know something that is just it's hard but a little more symbolic and there's it's a it's an allegory for something in society and it's called the tickle monster okay and there is a physical tickle monster but it has to do with our society's necessity to use humor as a defense mechanism you bored me what i don't even know where we are second business idea oh there's two within this i said there was two the tickle room it's like a haunted maze that you get around halloween time you know like people walk through like halloween horror nights but they're all just narrow rooms with people's hands in there and they tickle.

13:25Joe Santagato:Or they walk and their fingertips are out and they tickle in your feet.

13:32Frank Alvarez:How much time do we waste on that? Too much, probably, is the answer. Wouldn't it make more sense to just, like, have someone walk naked through a room of feathers? Where are we headed? We gotta grab the wheel right now. I think that, yes. or are feathers even comfortable?

13:52Joe Santagato:No. Or you've seen Casper. Number three idea. Go ahead. You've seen Casper. You remember the scene where she goes through the thing and it like powders her face? That but on feet and it's like a tickle chair.

14:07Frank Alvarez:We don't need to keep coming up with these ideas. Why do we need? We feel like we need to do it. A car wash but for feet.

14:18Joe Santagato:That's a shower, buddy. No, but you turn someone upside down. So they're in this position. This is going to be great. I know what upside down is. No, no, no. Not fully upside down. Yeah. That's pretty good. And they're on their back. Yeah. And it's a car wash. And it has the big foam rollers and the soap. You know what these are. The big flappy. The big flappy shit. Yes. Exactly, the Popper Dells. But it's for their feet, and it's just a Tickle experience. Tickle NYC. TNYC. Well, definitely don't want to.

14:58Frank Alvarez:You know what I'm waiting for? I'm waiting for when you could step into that box that some cartoons do, and then it's up to your neck, and then the thing comes down over your head, and then it cleans you and dresses you and cuts your hair, and then you're good for the day in like 30 seconds. There's a guy who makes videos like that where he creates these machines or whatever, And, like, obviously it's not, like, it's for a video. But it's, like, his bed. And then his bed, like, sits up. And, like, bacon hits him in the mouth. And he, like, it brushes his teeth. And, like, you know, it does shit like that.

15:28Frank Alvarez:I love stuff like that. Or you ever see the videos of the weird, I want to say Russian, I don't know, but it feels it. When you see the videos, you know. There's just wood, white walls. You're like, this is Russian. And it's a guy. And he, like, attaches something to his head. And he, like, pops balloons. I know exactly who you're talking about. Or it's like he has it on his dick or something. He's slapping it in the top of the balloons. I'm like, what is this? Yeah, I know exactly what you're referencing. I've seen one where he's just crushing spaghetti noodles.

16:00Joe Santagato:Yes, I love those. Wait, what? He does that, but it's just like a big thing of spaghetti.

16:05Frank Alvarez:And it's just on his head and he just crushes it.

16:08Joe Santagato:Yeah.

16:09Frank Alvarez:See, this is what I'm talking about.

16:11Joe Santagato:The world is a weird place the more that you kind of like start to pick it apart. Uh, yo, please tell me you've seen the guy.

16:18Frank Alvarez:It's like an Asian dude.

16:20Joe Santagato:Oh, that does the, this guy? What was that?

16:26Frank Alvarez:He's like, was that your, no, that was not.

16:30Joe Santagato:Was that your, no, but he like, he like strains. Oh my God, call mom Donnie. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's not what I meant. Now, see, that's completely taken out of context. Which guy are you talking about? He like strains his face and he like, he like, his face gets like red. He gets like red in the face. Oh, straining himself. I know what you're talking about, but no, that's not what I was talking about. Damn. That's a crazy thing to do. I didn't know that. It's like, let me, God, that looks bad.

16:59Frank Alvarez:Apologize before it even begins.

17:01Joe Santagato:Now, I don't want people to take that out of context. I did not like try to do.

17:04Frank Alvarez:The whole show is taken out of context. No, it's like an Asian dude And he like I guess it's like an art exhibit or something I don't know But he has like a What's the thing called for a bow? For a violin But he'll be playing it and like Like knocks it over Have you guys ever seen that? No Sorry, Joe

17:26Joe Santagato:This is that weird part of the internet Where Joey just finds things randomly hilarious Like the pipes Oh, the pipes! First of all, I have a pipe saved now and I use it pipes.

17:37Frank Alvarez:The pipes one is such a weird one. It's so good You know But there was what it's like this Asian guy and he like does these uh, it's like music I guess I don't know what's like him playing a drum But then he's like on the ground and he's like rolling around and there's just people watching this and like at all the comments Are like what the fuck is happening? No, I don't think I've seen that one fuck I wish I I don't even know how to search for that. I neither do I cuz I'm trying Asian guy with Bo Try that I don't know if he has a bow I think maybe in a video he did But it's like I don't know some random Asian guy wrestling on ground with drums Bro with a bunch of shit Like he'll have like literally like this and this And he'll just like start doing stuff And people are there like yeah Like it's so It's very like out there art type of shit You see the guy that throws sand in the air And makes animals Yes!

18:28Frank Alvarez:I've seen the people that have it on like a board And they flip it up like that No, I'm saying he just takes a handful of sand and he can just throw it and make a snake. What?

18:37Joe Santagato:Some of this shit that you guys, like, it's got to be AI. Like, it's not real.

18:43Frank Alvarez:I don't know that I'm at the level of boomer to the point where I would, like, fall for AI. Sure? I mean, maybe. I did fall for AI once before. The owl. Right? The owl? Wasn't it the one where it was like...

18:55Joe Santagato:No, it was like a, yeah, it was some sort of animal. Oh, it was like a bird or something, like a white bird or a butterfly or praying mantis. Yeah, and it was right there.

19:05Frank Alvarez:The guy had 15 fingers or something, and I didn't even see it.

19:08Joe Santagato:Yeah, that was pretty bad. Yeah, it's all right. We're good.

19:12Frank Alvarez:Propel Fitness Water. With Gatorade electrolytes, zero sugar, and vitamins, Propel hydrates better than water to help you get the most out of your workout and get back to your best self. What propels you? Propel with Gatorade electrolytes. implode it's fine are you trying to look this up right now i'm trying to find anything you're

19:33Joe Santagato:never gonna find a dude because it's unbelievable joe's your like algorithm is either european men screaming at the top of their lungs it really is a lot of that there's got to be something that

19:46Frank Alvarez:feels good about that there was a time where literally that's not like an exaggeration there was a guy who just kept popping up once you watch a video you interact with it if you like it you just get all of them yeah and it was just this guy and he was a european dude and he would just yell he would just yell i do phone and i would send it to frank and he'd be like why are you watching this and i'd be on the dude's page and i'm like it was and it wasn't like he he would just ah like just screaming i got my sand guy you got your sand boy you want to see my sand Yeah, let's show us your sand guy.

20:25Frank Alvarez:I'll show you my sand guy. So what do you mean he makes animals? You'll see, you'll see, you'll see. So he throws sand and makes animals. Look at that, that's a bird! It's a snake. I mean, is that a snake? I can make that.

20:41Joe Santagato:Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, the guy does throw something and it kind of looks like a snake. Alright, that's a full octopus. Look, he even did the colors of the fish. I don't know. This feels like I'm not taking anything away from this guy How many tosses do we get?

20:58Frank Alvarez:That's a good question That was a good watch What watch was it? That's a good spoon I don't know

21:06Joe Santagato:I've seen this guy before

21:07Frank Alvarez:I'm saying this bird right here Not this one This bird is incredible That's an incredible bird

21:14Joe Santagato:Yeah, but I could throw something And then take a still And find something that looks like it I'm sorry. I'm not taking away from this person. I think that's exactly what you're doing.

21:28Frank Alvarez:I just don't think it's as impressive as you think.

21:31Joe Santagato:Can you look up the guy that I was referencing so people could see that I wasn't being racist? Which one? Just look up Asian guy straining with bottle caps. Bottle caps. He uses bottle caps in a ton where he'll, like, pop bottle caps off something or, like, open a Corona with his belly.

21:52Frank Alvarez:Oh, I know the guy you're talking about.

21:53Joe Santagato:You know who I'm talking about, right? He does strain his face. Please, please, please pull it up just so for me to protect me and the sanctity of this show and my career. Let's roll the dice.

22:05Frank Alvarez:Well, what about... It's like people who make their own conclusions about that. No, no, no, no. Come on. What about him? It honestly scares me when I see those videos Because I'm like, this guy looks like he's going to die Yes, thank God Okay, why'd you pick this one? Because I feel like Frankie wanted this one That's what he told me to do I said bottle caps, so he's got his nipples attached to this thing

22:32Frank Alvarez:You're going to tell me See, that's the face Okay, hold on Now I'm going to have to justify my justification Okay, let's get something out of the way One, this is not what I was talking about I know, I thought this is who you were talking about No, no, no, no When you brought it up, I thought you were talking about a different Another Asian guy? There's a different Asian guy How many Asian guys are there? Who actually strains his face and he's like a jacked guy Oh no, I'm talking about this guy

22:58Joe Santagato:He'll like open a beer bottle with his like Dick

23:02Frank Alvarez:Yeah, I don't know about dick

23:04Joe Santagato:Can I take his nipples off the screen?

23:05Frank Alvarez:You absolutely shouldn't have been on there to begin with I think we're fine I think we're fine Joe's guy I cannot find I cannot find him

23:14Joe Santagato:That guy you won't find Okay You've never liked a TikTok from him or anything Or seen one recently So So this is the guy that I was talking about Ah

23:25Frank Alvarez:Well no not originally So that's the face you thought I was making This yes That would have been racist You ever see that kid So he does that And like He just like strains his face and whatever That's what I thought you were talking about You've never seen the nipple guy? I've seen him.

23:44Joe Santagato:He does weird little tricks with his butt and he's naked. I don't know about butt. Definitely nipples. Belly's been in there at points.

23:53Frank Alvarez:He literally had his nipples clamped. Well, this is, you know. His sponsors will not be happy with this one. It'll be okay. It'll be okay.

24:03Joe Santagato:We can pad it a little bit.

24:04Frank Alvarez:Pad a little before that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have you ever found a concerningly big lint in your belly button? You know what? I actually was thinking about this the other day. I love finding crust in there. You know? He's digging for... Are you digging in there? Yeah, I can't. There's not really much in there. You got a deep... You got a cavernous hole? You could have... Or is she tight? You could have... My shit is like vacuum sealed. Like, if I rub my finger, like, if I do this, I could feel air. Like, it's sucking me in. I could go in there a little, but like. Oh, I can get it. I could get the whole thing.

24:39Joe Santagato:The whole thing of what? What's the whole button? I could touch the whole button. I mean, yeah, technically I could touch the whole button too. Yeah, yeah.

24:46Frank Alvarez:Like I can get to every crack, but sometimes I'll get like a flake in there and I like digging that out. I like digging it.

24:51Joe Santagato:I do kind of like that. Yeah. Like you find like a, like a piece of like a corn flake in there and you're like, I haven't eaten Kellogg's in fucking months. Or it's like, it's like, it feels like earwax almost like in my belly button.

25:01Frank Alvarez:Now you lost me, brother. Well, it's not like waxy. Like, you know when you get like hard earwax that just falls out of your ear? Oh, I love that. Like a flake?

25:08Joe Santagato:I love like just sitting here and then just like earwax falls out. I'm like, it did its thing. Like it did what it's supposed to do. I don't clean my ears.

25:16Frank Alvarez:What?

25:16Joe Santagato:I don't clean my ears. You're not supposed to? No, you're not supposed to.

25:19Frank Alvarez:I mean, I have the camera and I dig in. I know.

25:21Joe Santagato:I don't do that either. I just kind of let my ears do their natural thing. And it ever shows? No. If I have blockage, I don't know about it. How would you not? because I don't go in there. I don't take a look. You would hear. I see those videos of people using, like, the water and their, like, ears, and then it's just, like, the water comes out, like, fucking, like, brown. It's like, ugh.

25:42Frank Alvarez:Can we hook you up to one of those cameras and see what's going on in your head? Sure. I mean, there's not much. In your head. How would you know? You don't go in there.

25:51Joe Santagato:That's fair. Yeah. I mean, I would imagine there's not much. If there is. You never, like, go like this? I mean, I'll go like this. But you never, like, take, like, a napkin and you're like.

26:00Frank Alvarez:Go in.

26:00Joe Santagato:And the people that are like, it feels good to, like, scratch your inner ears, I have never experienced that. Oh, I have.

26:06Frank Alvarez:Because when I use that camera and I get down in there, sometimes I can get my leg going like a golden retriever. Really? Yeah, dude. No, not me, man. I'm like a fucking German shepherd, and I'm like, ooh. Sometimes it makes me sneeze or cough. It's weird. It makes me cough. Yeah, it makes me like... Really? Yeah. But I have to cough and, like, say words. It's so strange.

26:23Joe Santagato:That is a very weird thing. I know. I never...

26:26Frank Alvarez:Like, you know how people, like, try to clean their throat by, like, doing this and, like... I saw that in the mask.

26:30Joe Santagato:He does that. He's like, yeah, exactly. And it's like trying to scratch the back of their throat. Yeah, but I think there's like nerves.

26:37Frank Alvarez:Something. I have notoriously wet ears. What's up? I have notoriously wet ears. Yeah, no, I heard that. What does that mean? Get over here. Let's poke around. Yeah, I don't touch him. It's like if you put your finger in there right now, you would come out and you'd have like water on them? Sometimes. Listen up, brother. You know what show you were on? You tell us you have wet ears. We need to see them. Are they, is it sweat? I don't know. Wet in what regard? Like if I put a Q-tip in there, it'll be wet. Wet? Sometimes. But like with wax? Sometimes. Sometimes it's just wet. Sometimes? You pronounce the T in wet so hard it's insane.

27:08Frank Alvarez:We all wet. I don't know if it's an anxious thing. If you could take a Q-tip and put it in your ear, and if it comes out and there's no wax, but it would still be wet? It could be wet. What is that? I don't know. I thought it was an anxious thing maybe? Your ears are anxious? You're scared of hearing? I don't know. It's just something I have.

27:23Joe Santagato:I don't know. We need like Dr. Mike to tell us what the fuck is going on with your ears. It's just something I have.

27:26Frank Alvarez:Yeah, we should get Dr. Bro, we should get Dr. Mike in here and ask him a bunch of questions.

27:31Joe Santagato:Yeah, I mean, he would probably leave here dumber. That's the goal. We get him in here thinking he's going to teach. He's so, like, patient that I would make it my fucking goal to make this guy lose his shit. Yeah, I love it. I saw, like, clips of the video where he did, he talked to, like, a bunch of anti-vaxxers. Jubilee, yeah. Yeah, and he's just like, I'm not trying to play gotcha. You know, like, he's very, like, he's smart. He knows what he's saying. He's patient. I would try to ruin that. And that's why we shouldn't get him or Hank Green in here, bro

28:01Frank Alvarez:Because I would make them hate us the first thing that the one from that video that I loved was there was one point where he's sitting there in his fucking scrubs Sitting across from this girl and he goes is there anything that I could say today that would change your mind? And she goes no because I've actually done the research

28:20Joe Santagato:sitting across from a doctor and scrubs once people started once people started to link like doctors and politics it was gone every doctor is fucked

28:31Frank Alvarez:from here on out we should we should though we should get Dr. Mike in here and be like yeah why does our boy got wet ass ears does that you know maybe you stump him

28:37Joe Santagato:we should start a series of episodes where we bring in someone that's specialized in a field this isn't a business idea this is a legitimately good idea where we do like 20 questions for dr mike 20 questions for hank green 20 questions for a mycologist because you're fucking into mushrooms now you know yeah and then and then just get them to the point where they hate us so much because we are so stupid that they can't fucking put up

29:11Frank Alvarez:with it anymore i'd be afraid to talk because once you say oh i have wet ears he's like oh does your ankle also hurt can you do this with your pinky i have too many questions no but see they're trained they're trained to not like worry you they're trained to just be like okay you know i mean if

29:26Joe Santagato:it's something that you like like he's not just gonna be like you got a problem brother go right now unless it was like you have a gunshot wound in your head that would be cool though not the

29:34Frank Alvarez:gunshot well thank you yeah yeah you know what i mean but wet ears dude what a random symptom that

29:41Joe Santagato:you have because he would be like okay dr mike would be like okay wearing a fucking you know a patek watch and he'd be like okay it sounds like you have your phobia of his home draxacid you know and like yeah i just don't want to know that i mean but what's it gonna do ruin

29:58Frank Alvarez:your day maybe or i just have wet ears you've been wet in your ears forever what if you find

30:02Joe Santagato:out it's just like a symptom of having just giant balls yeah imagine that was his follow-up like Wait, do you have fat nuts? Just stop me once I'm getting...

30:13Frank Alvarez:Yeah, that'd just be my cross to bear. Your whole life, you've had wet ears? Yeah, sensitive ears, wet ears.

30:17Joe Santagato:Sensitive ears. I've got good hearing. You have good hearing? Good hearing because the water picks up the vibrations and it delivers them to your cochlear implant. Bro, do you remember hearing tests back in the day? I used to like... Oh, I thought it was like, I'm going to go to the NBA if I...

30:33Frank Alvarez:I legitimately thought I was passing that test and they're going to be like, hold on.

30:36Joe Santagato:Hold on, this guy is such a good fucking hero. You're so good at hearing. Like, yo, there's so many of those that I had the same mentality with, where it was like the vision test, where I'd be like, they'd turn around and be like, EFD, EFG. Cheating? Yeah, it's like, because I thought that being good at hearing, they'd be like, holy shit, wait a sec. Give this guy a million dollars.

31:02Frank Alvarez:I literally, yeah, like I thought that they would be like, oh my fucking God, how did you hear that? Like, I wanted them to say that. Because I was not – I was convinced that they were playing sounds. Like, some of them were sounds, but other things were just, like, frequency. Like, they were testing to see if I was not human. That's what I thought.

31:20Joe Santagato:Exactly, yes. Like, superhuman or something. Oh, yeah, I heard that. Yeah, I remember they would just be like, did you hear – because they were also, like, tipping their – you know, tipping it a little bit, where they'd be like, did you hear anything? And I'd be like, yep. I'd just say yes to everything. because like hearing something that's not there is not an issue. Not hearing something that is there was what they were looking for. Bro, also the most uncomfortable set of headphones I've ever put on. Yeah, they were from like when we first landed on the moon and this machine could talk to someone in Morse code and like fucking Myanmar.

31:53Joe Santagato:Dude, it literally was like a fucking World War I fighter pilot's headset.

31:58Frank Alvarez:My teacher in high school was doing that test for us. like however old you are this is what you should be hearing like this tone yeah this girl we got up to like 50 60 couldn't hear the tones so and she's a big raver big partier like like all that and he goes if you want to hear your kids crying when you're older you should really stop doing what you're doing and then she cried and ran out of the class that's a crazy thing to say

32:23Joe Santagato:that's funny as shit though i would have been like don't want to hear them cry that's why i don't I couldn't be a teacher because that's the shit that I would say. He'd be like, if you want to not be a fucking idiot, you know. That's so funny. There are those videos where it's just like, I remember from, you know, when I was like 22, it was just like, people over 30 can't hear this pitch. And I was like, oh, I can hear it.

32:44Frank Alvarez:I always think of Home Alone 3, which I don't remember that movie at all, but I do remember him having a dog whistle. Boy, that movie sucks. Trash. But I do remember him having a dog whistle.

32:55Joe Santagato:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Only the dogs can hear it or something. Yeah. And then he gets like the dog or something and like trips the guy up. I, I, I, yeah, I remember dog whistles were a huge thing in the late nineties. Bro.

33:06Frank Alvarez:You remember laser pointers? The coolest thing in the world.

33:10Joe Santagato:If there was a claw machine in my vicinity and I was seeing a laser pointer in it, I was going to do everything I could to get it.

33:19Frank Alvarez:Yeah. Laser pointers were so fucking cool. And my parents made it seem that if this thing touched my eyeball, I would be blind immediately.

33:27Joe Santagato:I mean, I don't know if that's true, but I still operate under, I just used a laser two days ago and I operate under the exact same. Why did you use a laser two days ago? We have a laser level and we were hanging pictures. Oh, okay. So I like threw it up. Oh yeah, like a key chain one. I threw it up. I was shining it into my neighbor's house. Yo, I'm serious. Like I still operate under that same mentality. Like I literally was just like, no one look at it. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's like Medusa. No, dude, I remember they had the ones with the interchangeable, the gold ones. Yes. With the interchangeable tops.

34:01Joe Santagato:Yeah. And it would be like a snowman or a star. Yeah. Yeah, those things were fucking cool. Yeah, I really like laser pointers. Fucking. We used to get one and we would fuck with our cat. Yeah. So like she would go nuts for it.

34:15Frank Alvarez:I used to have a dog camera that would have one of those and Charlie would chase it when I wasn't home. Dude, it was like borderline torture.

34:22Joe Santagato:Like we would shine it on the wall. my cat would freak the fuck out and then we'd turn it off and she would like where the fuck is that basically seriously what a time laser pointers laser pointers i got it i

34:35Frank Alvarez:remember the last time i got a laser pointer and we'll get to that in a second but we do have some sponsors on antonio's laptop because mine we don't know uh but the first one being squarespace squarespace is going to be the website where you build your website so if you have an e-commerce business or a small business big business whatever it is where you create content you want to build website professional looking one at that because that is your first impression so it matters to have a good website and squarespace is going to make that happen for you um and yeah they make it very easy they have these templates that you can go on to their site you click on the template it populates the website you change out the text you change out the photos and already you're off to the races you have a great looking website they also have a lot of tools they're going to help you optimize your traffic let you know where all the traffic traffic is coming from all of that and it's going to help you out in that many ways.

35:23Frank Alvarez:So right now you can check out squarespace.com slash basement and you will save 10 % off your first purchase of a website or a domain. Again, that is squarespace.com slash basement to save 10 % off of your first purchase of a website or a domain when you use that code basement. So a lot of people have hit me up and been like, hey, I've been using Squarespace because we use it for stuff. and um you know all the stuff that we build all the websites we've used them for squarespace so there you go uh we also have zocdoc zocdoc is a free app and website that helps you find and book high quality in-network doctors um so you can find someone you love and i use zocdoc all the time honestly anytime that i need to see any sort of doctor i had to see an eye doctor recently i use zocdoc pop them in there they even use my code make them happy you know what i mean but you go on ZocDoc you type in your insurance it'll show people in your area not just primary care physicians but also eye doctors, dermatologists, whatever specialists and they'll show their next available appointments as well so make it very easy to find doctors that are also patient reviewed so if they have a good score it's because patients are having a good experience there so stop putting off those doctor's appointments go to ZocDoc.com to find and instantly book a doctor you love today that is ZocDoc spelled Z-O-C-D-O-C dot com slash basement and uh yeah thanks for supporting the show yeah we appreciate the love

36:49Joe Santagato:we appreciate the support wherever it may be especially on patreon patreon.com slash the basement yard we tell you about it every single week because it's where you can continue to support us and get more of us if you go over to patreon.com slash the basement yard you sign up for that first year you get these weekly episodes one whole week in advance seven whole days in advance i know it doesn't sound like you know oh maybe it doesn't sound like a lot maybe that's what you're thinking it's it's a lot you get in on the the he he's the ha ha's the inside jokes and everything before everybody else everyone loves to be in an inside joke i'll get back to one one day so you do that on that first tier it's great second tier you get exclusive episodes every single friday you also get access to other stuff that's on there i mean we're talking hundreds of episodes from years past that you will have access to as soon as you you go in there and you join as well as some other stuff like the msg doc that we threw on there uh we we've gotten so much love and support for it.

37:41Joe Santagato:Mikey did his absolute fucking thing on there. So if you want to go check it out, go to patreon.com slash the basement yard. We thank you guys for continuing to make, you know, to support us on there. 2025 was our biggest year yet. We want to make 2026 continue to move in that direction. So thank you. We love you. We appreciate you. And if you want to sign up and save yourself a couple extra bucks while doing it, just go to a web browser, whichever one you use and go to the physical website, patreon.com slash the basement yard. If you use the Patreon app they're going to charge you a little bit extra because they need to pay the tech overlords that are going to make this planet possibly just explode so go check it out patreon.com slash the basement yard i think you know you know who those guys are and uh sign up or you know gift give the gift of patreon you know whatever you want to do we love you we thank you now uh yeah i think we can get back to it what are you saying the last thing you said the last i i remember exactly the last time I got a, this is weird, the last time I got a fucking laser pointer, I got it from a bowling alley claw machine game.

38:46Joe Santagato:And I recently went bowling again.

38:48Frank Alvarez:You went bowling?

38:49Joe Santagato:Yeah, I went bowling. I haven't been bowling in years. Dude, Becca and I took the kids bowling. First of all, fun as fuck. I like bowling. Dude, bowling. Yeah. But yeah.

38:59Frank Alvarez:I get very territorial. Territorial. Territorial. I get very territorial over like a ball. That's mine. That's my ball. That's my ball.

39:07Joe Santagato:Don't use my fucking ball. I don't really care that much, but I forgot just how, like... I don't know how to say this without sounding mean. Bowling alleys are such a piece of shit, but they're so magical. Yeah. Like, was it jumping? It was a packed day. Oh. Pack day at bowling alley. So sorry. Yeah, that was a wild octave. I apologize. But it was like really like every lane we just got in. There was only one lane and we just got it. And like kids were running around. Like it just reminded me of the days when we were younger. Like the carpet was still the same carpet, you know, from the fucking 90s.

39:50Joe Santagato:It smells like shit. And had blood on it. Blood and spit, you know. And then it smelled like cigarettes and, you know, stale Coors Light.

39:58Frank Alvarez:Yeah. And just like, but it's so magic. Yeah. You know what I really didn't like about balling? Sometimes I would go over to the balls. You see like the small holes and you're like, my hands are bigger than that. Then you get to a certain ball and the thumb hole is so big. And I'm like, my dick wouldn't fit in here.

40:15Joe Santagato:Like, what the fuck? I'm not even kidding. Whenever I have, I remember that as a kid. I would always think of your father's thumb. Because I'd be like, this is only for Joe's dad's thumb.

40:26Frank Alvarez:I'm so happy you said thumb. Why? Not for a kid. Oh my god, this big hole in this bowling ball reminds me of Joe's dad's dick. Oh god. Brings me right back to Joe's dad's cock.

40:40Joe Santagato:No. Thumb. Let's make that better. Brings me right back to his shit. I don't think I've ever seen your dad's dick. Actually, I would remember that. Yeah, I think I would remember that if you did too. I would remember that.

40:54Frank Alvarez:No, that's how I would always get it. Have you seen your dad's penis? Yeah. I've seen my dad's penis too. I think everyone's seen my dad's penis. You seen Yellow's penis? Yeah Alright That made it seem How long ago? I was young Oh okay It made it seem like You just saw it at Thanksgiving No I don't know

41:09Joe Santagato:I mean The yeah Was more of an implication Of like every kid I hit the button on here That lowers you a little bit Oh But You know I Definitely like Saw my dad's dick I don't know where to go from there It's bowling We're bowling We're bowling The hole really big Sorry the dad's dick comments Just threw me off completely

41:29Frank Alvarez:The dicks are hitting me.

41:30Joe Santagato:No, my dad's dick is in my head. I'm thinking of yours. I'm thinking of yellow's.

41:37Joe Santagato:No, no, no. But, like, it is such a, like, maybe it's just the one I went to. It wasn't, like, modernized yet. Because a lot of, the last time I went to a bowling alley that wasn't this most recent time, it was, like, the lights were, like, neon. And, like, there's, like, pink and black everywhere. And, like, it's a modernized one. I like a good 90s, early 2000s bowling alley that just smells like shit. Yeah. It looks like shit. Yeah. They've got the snappiest hot dogs you could imagine. Yeah. And the staff is near dead. They hate you. Yeah. You're a paying patron in their facility, but they fucking hate your guts.

42:21Joe Santagato:Were the shoes still disgusting? The grossest shoes I've ever put on.

42:25Frank Alvarez:What is the reason why bowling shoes need to look like a Frankenstein version of a shoe? It's got to be for something with the floor. Or maybe they don't want people to steal them. Oh, I just thought of that.

42:39Joe Santagato:That's a really good point. It's like they're so ugly. Who would wear these? Oh, my God. I know. I know. I know. I know that there is some bowling alley in New York that's just like, we actually, all our bowling shoes are Nike. Probably. You know? There's that place we went to. What was it called? Like, Gutter Bar?

42:56Frank Alvarez:Yeah.

42:56Joe Santagato:That place is fucking awesome because of the hot dogs, also because of the bowling. Yeah. That place was good. I got kicked out of there once. And I didn't know. How do you not know you got kicked out? You know. Oh, yeah. You were elsewhere? Yeah. You were in the upside down.

43:13Frank Alvarez:Yeah, yeah. Which was an accident. But I was going down the lane, I think. Oh, like walking down the – oh, like too far when you threw the ball. Yeah, so I was hitting the deck a lot. And they weren't happy. Because I'll tell you something about those bowling lanes. They're slick. Oh, yeah. Those boys are slick. Oh, yeah. Kicked out of a bowling alley is a new low. I don't know if I was kicked out. They were like, all right.

43:37Joe Santagato:Like, they wrapped me up. We also used to, like, that was, like, the first place that, like, as a crew, everyone was able to go and underage drink. Yeah. Because some of us had fake IDs. Some of us didn't want it. Like, even with fake IDs, didn't want to test it. But like everyone went to the bowling alley because we knew the people that bartended there. And it was like 18, 19. Just go and drink.

44:00Frank Alvarez:Yeah. Go crazy. I remember. And I used to go there and drink fish bowls. Yeah. Yep. And I couldn't even tell you what's in that bitch. Fish.

44:09Joe Santagato:I'll tell you what. It was a bowl. It was like fucking like a Malibu rum, hypnotic, you know, like high C. I see. You know what I'm talking about? Like just like Capri Sun. When was the last time you were at the bowling alley that we grew up at? I actually know, and it's not a story I want to tell. I was going for a year. Oh, 20... This was happening to you in bowling alley. 2014, 2013. It was involved in my dad's dick. No, no, no. Your dad's dick is in no way, shape, or form involved in this night. I saw another man piss on another man in the bathroom. Good.

45:00Joe Santagato:Like, all over them. What are you doing with your hands? Just where? All over them. I was with my brother-in-law.

45:08Frank Alvarez:It seems like you're just telling the story. No, no, no.

45:10Joe Santagato:There's a lot that I'm leaving out, and I'll tell you why afterward. But, like, one of the things that happened that night was – Because this is when we would order pitchers. Yeah. We'd go and it'd be like, that was like a big, like 20, early 2010s thing. Like, oh wait, I can get a pitcher of beer and not, I just drink out of the pitcher. Like people realized they could do that. And a pitcher of like Natty Light was like 15 bucks. And I remember there was a guy there that we know and another guy there that we also know. One of them passed out drinking, like drunk in the stall. And the kid kicked open the door and pissed all over him.

45:46Joe Santagato:that's mean and i was like this is fucking insane and i remember being with with my brother-in-law and just being like we can't ever come back here it goes down in the bowling alley apparently

45:58Frank Alvarez:i would go back though i want to go see where the piss happened i think my sister went and took her kids like recently like within the last two years what you're referencing is merrick lanes well

46:09Joe Santagato:formerly known as merrick lanes i think now it's called like bolero or something like that i have

46:14Frank Alvarez:No idea. But it was like a story of bowl at one point. It was like 360, some shit. I don't know.

46:21Joe Santagato:Yeah, it was a piece of shit.

46:25Frank Alvarez:Are you good at bowling? No. I'm like, I can't spin the ball. Okay. But I'll, like, you know, get some straight lines going.

46:36Joe Santagato:That's good. I can't do straight lines. I mean, no, no, no. I can't do spinning. I could do like I throw it straight hard. Damn, dude, that was crazy.

46:47Frank Alvarez:Love that. He's like, when I grip the ball. It's kind of like when I. No, no, no.

46:56Joe Santagato:I could throw it. But like if I'm off a little, I will throw it straight into the gutter. Yeah. Like it either goes directly head on or it goes that way. Yeah, I'm like, I don't even know.

47:09Frank Alvarez:I'll get a couple strikes. Like, I'm not like terrible. I used to bowl like this.

47:14Joe Santagato:That's horrible. That's bad? Yeah, that's horrible. Really? At least I'm not under, you know.

47:20Frank Alvarez:Are you good at bowling? I'm a two-handed bowler. You're a two-handed bowler? Stop it. Two-handed bowler? Stop it. That's embarrassing. It's like jumping into a pool with your... I kind of throw it like a rugby ball, sort of.

47:31Joe Santagato:Oh, fuck you. I know exactly the type of guy he is. Oh. The fucking, you know, Dragon Ball Z kid. The kamehameha.

47:39Frank Alvarez:Yeah, like one finger's in the hole, and that's the spin, and you just...

47:43Joe Santagato:Are you good? This is... You know why he asks if we're good?

47:46Frank Alvarez:Are you? Because he knows he's good. I'm okay. I could beat you two. What's that? How the fuck do you know? Wait, hold on a second. You just said you were bad. Well, I don't know how bad I am compared to you. Okay. That wasn't a sentence. The lack of confidence, probably. You know what? No. Now, if it's a competition, I'll fucking beat you both. We could do this. What's the highest you bowled? Oh, I don't know.

48:07Joe Santagato:160 something yeah like 150 maybe i think i've bowled a one here's the thing i'm either getting a strike or i'm not getting anything like i'm either getting a strike or i'm getting five pins and then i'm missing the spare i don't go for spare you know what i mean um

48:28Frank Alvarez:i don't even know what i would usually bowl i mean i don't think that i would bowl under a hundred That would be. That was pretty. That's pretty bad. If under 100 is you don't really go around on a first date to bowling. Yeah. You know. You know what's always. Bowling is. That's a great first date thing. But it's funny you bring that up because I remember like bowling is one of those things that's like maybe not this. If you're like horrible at it. And then ice skating. I see couples all the time that go ice skating and it's like. I always think of just friends. One of you you just can't do it.

48:59Frank Alvarez:Yeah. I always think of just. Why are you here? I think of just friends. Were you there? that one time though we were at uh central park and we went to the ice skating rink and there was a couple there and the dude was horrible and i was like damn this is rough and he eventually hit the deck at one point i didn't see him fall but i turned around he's got blood just rushing from

49:21Joe Santagato:his face that's i'm like dude get out of here no second date for that person yeah at all i don't

49:25Frank Alvarez:know if it was a first date but like yeah bowling is one of those things that like you need to

49:29Joe Santagato:confidently bowl a at least 100 to go on a date with someone. You have to be able to like hit a strike if you're there on that. But if you're hitting like five gutters in a row, like what are we doing here? Yeah. First date, you need to pull out like at least a 100 score. At least. And one of those 100 need to be a strike. If not, you need to do that. You're in trouble.

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50:07Joe Santagato:You can't ice skate? No. I can stay up. I can't move.

50:12Frank Alvarez:That's not ice skating. Icestanding, I believe. I can stand. I can stand. I can ice skate. Yeah. I can skate, but not like a fucking hockey player.

50:23Joe Santagato:I can't get over the fact that you bowl with two hands. Yo, if we were in high school at the same time, I would have fucking hated you.

50:29Frank Alvarez:That's fine.

50:30Joe Santagato:You would have lost in bowling. Wow. We knew kids that bowled, like, on their, like, high school team.

50:37Frank Alvarez:Yeah, one of our friends, I've watched them bowl the 300. See, that's. I've also seen him bowling a 300. Like, I've seen him do it, and then I saw him doing it and getting, like, to the last frame, and our friend bowled in his frame by accident. Yo. And he felt so bad. Oh, my God.

50:57Joe Santagato:I would have been that person. I know I would have been that person. No, it wasn't on purpose. I know. I would have done it on purpose. Yeah. Prank Frank. A prank Frank.

51:05Frank Alvarez:I would have, like, let me just destroy this for you.

51:07Joe Santagato:I mean, but that doesn't make sense. You could go back and reset.

51:11Frank Alvarez:No. I mean, if you're going to bowl a 300 for, like, the bowling alley, you have to, like, submit. Like, you have to, like, show that it happened. Really? Yeah. You can't just go back. They're computers. They can't see like, oh, so-and-so bowled a 300.

51:24Joe Santagato:If you edit, then it doesn't count. It does like the star. You know what? We should – do you think they have like – if we went to our neighborhood bowling alley, would we be able to see like any names we recognize bowling a 300? Is our friend's name up there?

51:37Frank Alvarez:I mean if there is one like that, then yeah, it is. I watched them do it there. But how long do you think it would take you if you were locked in a bowling alley to bowl a 300?

51:48Joe Santagato:That sounds like a Picky Boys video if I've ever heard of one. Yeah. Where it's like, Danny's not leaving until he finishes four bottles of Doritos vodka or bowls of 300.

51:59Frank Alvarez:That's really hard because you get tired, too. Yeah, you're throwing around a 20-pound ball. Barstool does shit like that where it's like you've got to hit, like, a bunch of— Yeah, they're fucking hysterical. Our fantasy football punishment is you have to go to a gym and hit 300 threes before you can leave. Okay. Who lost? My friend Marco. He will be there all night. Not good. 300 threes is a lot. 300 is a ton, dude. Yeah. Maybe a week? A month? To what? Do a bowling? A month, maybe? I have to be in there for a month?

52:34Joe Santagato:Yeah, I don't know. I don't know that I could ever do that. Yeah, I don't think I'd ever be able to do that. I'd reach a point of, like, insanity that I would just leave. I would need a coach also. Like, if I could be there with a coach, I could probably get it done, like, months. say like like when when i was when we were just bowling like my hand starts to cramp and hurt like my my like inner palm your palm yeah like it started to like slap at this thing on its ass no but like just i don't know what what i was doing but like it started to hurt and i was just like i can't do more than we played like a game and a half because the kids were like starting to lose it i don't think i could do more than two games did you guys get bumps so the one that we went to it does bumpers for specific oh like it's like it's like computer now yeah so like it'll be like for certain bowlers it'll be bumpers and then they'll literally like when it's like my turn they'll just go down which i was like yo i mean i'll bump i'll bump it up you know we don't need to put them down dude i don't even know that i could beat you can't even beat like an actual like good bowler if you had we that would be a good video if we had a professional bowler come and it's like three of us versus him or her.

53:46Frank Alvarez:Crazy. Oh, and it's like a scramble. So like best ball. Best lane?

53:53Joe Santagato:No, I'm saying like if it was like a professional bowler and then three of us or two of us and we have to combine to beat this professional bowler.

54:03Frank Alvarez:Just get a professional. Oh, we could do that. Oh, no, we can't do that.

54:06Joe Santagato:Why not?

54:07Frank Alvarez:An actual professional bowler?

54:08Joe Santagato:I know. That's the point. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That would be funny. We get like professional like high school bowler or something.

54:14Frank Alvarez:Yeah, they could beat us.

54:15Joe Santagato:Yeah, I mean, but a high schooler, if they lose, they're going to get bullied for it. Like let it be like a professional like bowler.

54:21Frank Alvarez:I think it's good to be bullied.

54:25Joe Santagato:That's why I'm not allowing you to get tickled. To your father. Full circle. Full circle. Your father. Whose penis we're not thinking about. We're not in one.

54:34Frank Alvarez:And we're not thinking about your dad's dick either. Only Frankie. I'm not thinking about his dad's dick. We do have sponsors, by the way. that we're going to get to right now. We have HIMSS, okay? HIMSS offers convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments with ingredients that work, including choose orals, medication, serums, and sprays. Okay, they are doctor-trusted ingredients like finasteride and minoxidil can further stop hair loss or regrow hair in as little as three to six months. And there's a lot of guys out there that are dealing with hair loss or their hair is thinning.

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57:03Joe Santagato:Man, bowling Who would have thought This would be a bowling episode? I mean I haven't bowled And talked a good amount About bowling We should go bowling?

57:11Frank Alvarez:We could do a Santa Claus City's bowling video We could If we went there On like a weekday There's probably no one in there

57:16Joe Santagato:Or we could call and say Hey, give us two lanes So we could film I'm sure that the bowling alley Would be like Yeah What are they gonna say? No Alright, fuck you bowling Fuck you Mr. Bowling Yeah, like who the fuck like we have to wear cool shoes bowling i mean those shoes are arguably garbage i will say this that plays the one in a story that we used to go to those hot dogs might have awakened my hot dog loving ability really that's where it started those are good hot dogs dude and elm jack and icyyp yeah now that i think about it a lot of just hot dogs no i think about it just hot dogs awakened named everywhere you could get a hot dog yeah Yeah, in Astoria, like any time of the day.

58:02Frank Alvarez:Damn, ICYP hot dogs. I remember those.

58:05Joe Santagato:I used to – so when I worked at Elm Jack, for those of you guys that don't know, Elm Jack is still around? Yeah. It's a Little League baseball spot in, I guess, technically East Elmhurst, right? And I used to work – that was, like, my first, like, off-the-books job because I was a groundskeeper there. And I would just go to the snack stand and just eat hot dogs. that's a good gig dude and then i'd ride a cart around and put some clay on a pitcher's mound and i was a fucking happiest kid on the planet and i was making ten dollars an hour oh at like

58:40Frank Alvarez:13 i don't know that i ever made 10 10 an hour you're making it you're making it now no you're

58:47Joe Santagato:making it um but yeah any of the jobs that i had what was my first actual job before you answer What was your first actual job? I'd love to hear this.

58:56Frank Alvarez:Pizza delivery. Wow. Five bucks an hour. Five bucks an hour? Five bucks an hour. Plus tips, obviously. And the tips is really where you do it. Did you do well on tips? I did well on tips. What'd you usually, like a good night? Oh, I don't know. A good, good night. And how many nights do you work a week? When I was working there, you know, I work, I do things well. It was a. That's what I'm trying to do. I think it was five days a week, six. Oh, wow. It would be good. 100 maybe

59:23Joe Santagato:100 a night Yeah 100 You were making 52 ,000 dollars I forgot how What

59:36Frank Alvarez:What, Frank?

59:39Joe Santagato:You were making$52 ,000? I just completely forgot how stuff works. No, actually, I'm not off. If you make$1 ,000 a week, what were you? How many? If you're working, let's say on a good night.

59:52Frank Alvarez:Okay, on a good night.

59:53Joe Santagato:All right, so on average, what would you make a night? I don't know, 70, 60. 70 times 5, 350. And you would work how many hours? 5, 4. Four hours. Four. So 20 a day times five. So that's. Yeah. You got it. 200. Where are we? All right. So like 550 a week. Sure. Let's say 600 to round it off.

1:00:22Frank Alvarez:Why don't you get me? I'm hoping I did the math correct. But then there's like, there's gas. If you ever ding your car, it's a very, it's a very. Well, yeah. And you also get. Do you have any fun stories from delivering pizzas? On Valentine's Day, someone in a robe with nothing underneath gave me$100. A woman? Yeah, a woman. Whoa! She had her thing out? She had her penis out? It was more like a very long V. But you saw the top of her. Was she older? Older. How old? Oh, I don't know. 50s? Oh, so she was there. She wanted the young bull. I don't know. She gave you$100? $100 bill How much did you What did she order?

1:01:06Frank Alvarez:Just a pizza A regular pie One piece she tipped you$100? Yeah On Valentine's Day

1:01:11Joe Santagato:That's a crazy thing Am I bugging? That's a crazy thing to get on Valentine's Day Pizza? Brother

1:01:17Frank Alvarez:How about the naked answering the door Yeah, yeah, yeah Guy$100 Whatever about that That's crazy Obviously we're not dealing with the same

1:01:22Joe Santagato:I'm telling you right now Each of the people in this room Is going to get to a point Where they don't care about that anymore Care about what?

1:01:28Frank Alvarez:Being naked I am definitely going to care if someone's coming to deliver something to my house to put clothes on. I argue that you will not. I don't know what you're even basing that on. Just knowledge of things. I had a guy too when I delivered pizzas that every single time that I would show up to his house, he was in tighty-whities and he was sweating his ass off. Like every single time. But he wasn't weird. It was like it was normal. It was almost like he was working out. But it was every time I went to his house.

1:01:57Joe Santagato:I never worked in that industry, so I have no stories about that. The delivering pizzas, though. I've never had any of that. You see some things. It was like a local pizzeria, or was it like a Domino's or something? Local. Oh, okay.

1:02:10Frank Alvarez:Did you ever drop the pizza? No, I've never dropped the pizza, but one of my friends who also worked there delivered a ghost pizza is what we called it, and he got fired for it. What's a ghost pizza? He got to the door, pulled out the pizza box. There was just no pizza in the box.

1:02:25Joe Santagato:What happened to the pizza?

1:02:26Frank Alvarez:He just grabbed a box instead of the pizza on the oven. You didn't tell immediately? He partook in some lettuce quite often. Oh, got it. He wasn't a good delivery driver. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. Yeah, one time I was walking to the fucking door, and you have, like, the little thing that keeps it warm, and I'm walking, and I hit a patch of black ice. Dude, I went up, like, fucking Harry and Marv. Like a Looney Tune? Yeah, dude, I went up in the air, like, Home Alone 2, and landed on my back, and the whole pizza just flipped over. And I literally just got to the front, and I was just like, here you go, and I just got out of there.

1:03:03Frank Alvarez:I fucking peeled out because I was like, their pizza is all over the top of this thing. Oh. It happens. That sucks. I used to – yo, there's nothing like working in a pizzeria. You can just grab a slice whenever. It's amazing.

1:03:16Joe Santagato:Dude, I wish. It was so good. I wish I could work in a pizzeria right now. I honestly would. We should – you know what? You know how like there was a I'm coming up with Santa Gato Studios videos right now that are really good What if we just did a day where it was just like we partnered with a pizzeria and we just sling pizza and like make a video out of it Oh, I used to slang them and I'm just saying like if we were just like yo, we're doing we're doing this day We're filming a Santa Gato Studios video We're gonna be making and selling pizza at this pizzeria in Astoria. Now we're getting crazy.

1:03:47Joe Santagato:This is illegal Frank

1:03:49Frank Alvarez:Why because the place has to like Like, there's like, you know, there's like health codes and shit.

1:03:56Joe Santagato:Who the fuck is going to come for a little, you know, mom and pop pizza shop?

1:04:01Frank Alvarez:I don't know. I don't know that you could just be like, oh, we're just going to sell pizza that we made.

1:04:05Joe Santagato:No, at a pizzeria. Like, we make it. Like, there. Sure, we'll go through a couple hours of, like, food training. So you get hired by the pizzeria for a day?

1:04:14Frank Alvarez:Yeah. Dude, the pizzeria that I worked at, like, the last pizzeria that I worked at, the guy who made the pizzas was so little this little italian guy i think his name is mario honestly the shorter the italian man the better the pizza oh yeah yeah um i uh he used to have me like put the pizzas in because he couldn't so i'm like i'm basically doing every job in here

1:04:39Joe Santagato:bro r.i.p to that pizza place i love that place so much which one go oh portobello portobello yeah

1:04:46Frank Alvarez:I put about I was talking about Antonio's but that's like a restaurant now you worked at two pizza places yeah I worked at Antonio's dude I like when they first opened I like applied for a job and I got it Antonio's had good pizza too I think they're still there are they I think they're like a restaurant it has nothing to do with you comes with the name I hated working there never I take it back literally the name I did everything at that place I was like bagging shit in the basement i did one what the best part about that job though was that one of our chefs used to make these things for dessert they were little um cheesecakes and i used to fucking slam them

1:05:23Joe Santagato:when no one was looking do you subscribe to the mentality of like every person should do like one job in the service industry and their point in their life i think so i think it gives

1:05:34Frank Alvarez:you perspective you know with what people have to deal with because if you don't have that perspective then you you never like obviously this is obvious now but like you never you you don't know what it's like dealing with people in that way because no matter what you're kind of you're representing this place so you have to have a wall and people just like beat you up all day for the most part like they're ordering stuff and they're very like entitled in the way that they order things and they're a little that's how retail is too yeah people like they believe

1:06:05Joe Santagato:that you are below them because they are buying something like they think that they're buying something and it's like paying for your salary you know what i mean or like you walk in here i don't work for you i work for the store i'm here to help but i don't mind i feel like i feel like with food i can imagine it's really bad because it's like there's like a sense of like specifically with like most of the restaurants we're going to are like you know like owned by a family you know what i mean like yeah so like there is a sense of just like this place keeps the lights on because i am here right yeah you know like i am a i am a constant patron here so like they feel like cater to me yeah and that sucks you're also dealing with hungry people

1:06:47Frank Alvarez:and depending on the person that's like the worst person to deal with yeah hungry like i i legitimately

1:06:53Joe Santagato:know people that like when they're hungry they're like angry people like hangry like the the the

1:06:59Frank Alvarez:the same i don't know if this is a hot take i'm probably gonna just grow up i know i agree you know i'm like no but people like i feel like i've gotten flipped the other way people like no you don't understand it's like well everyone gets hungry like just like relax i think people

1:07:16Joe Santagato:probably have like undiagnosed like blood sugar things that like that is explaining why they react certain ways but like blood sugar makes you an angry like a rude person i'm not but like like Like something like where they need to keep their blood sugar at a certain level or like.

1:07:33Frank Alvarez:Yeah.

1:07:34Joe Santagato:I still don't think that you should be rude. I don't care.

1:07:36Frank Alvarez:Yeah.

1:07:36Joe Santagato:I mean, I'm not.

1:07:37Frank Alvarez:Bro, one time. I'm not justifying it. One time we had this couple come in and they ordered like a gluten free pizza. And this was like when gluten, the gluten shit was very new. And the guy just started freaking out in the restaurant. Like there's mad people around. And like we try to give him his pizza or whatever. I wasn't involved in this interaction, but I was like, yo, why is this guy bugging out? And they were like giant crackers, essentially, like the gluten-free, like, crusts. And the guy just started screaming. And I don't know what was going on. Maybe he thought the pizza we gave them wasn't gluten-free or something.

1:08:14Frank Alvarez:And he goes, no, I need to know. No, she will die. And he starts screaming. She will die if she eats this. I was like, whoa, which I get the concern. but yo not a screaming in the fucking restaurant like owning a restaurant is such a cool like

1:08:30Joe Santagato:concept for like 0.5 seconds and then you think of shit like that and it like immediately goes

1:08:35Frank Alvarez:out the window well i got i told you this story i think i told the story i had mad times but i got in trouble because like i'm not good at that like i'm good to a certain extent but when people get a little crazy then i'm like okay i can't now you're taking me out of this thing but a guy called me and was just like our the soda you gave us isn't is warm and i was like oh i'm sorry like we are very busy right now so i probably didn't spend a lot of time in the fridge that we have right here so whatever like a two little bottle he's like yeah uh what are we gonna do about this and i was like i i'm not i don't know i don't know what to do like i'm sorry like you know blah blah we're busy and he's like yeah uh uh i prefer my soda to be cold and i said put ice in it and my manager grabbed the phone from me because i was like bro what the fuck do you want me to do i'm fucking 19 working here i get what you're saying because you're being treated

1:09:22Joe Santagato:a certain way but like i also kind of understand where that person is coming from like if i'm ordering something and it comes not in the like in my whether it be in my head or not in the condition at which i think it's going to come or like the it's a two liter bottle of soda Regardless. Like, it's not about cold.

1:09:43Frank Alvarez:You get it at the grocery store. It's in the fucking aisle.

1:09:46Joe Santagato:Yeah, that's a good point. That is a good point. But nonetheless, like, the quality is something. Like, when it comes, not good. Like, it's like, oh, well, like, this is not what I wanted.

1:09:55Frank Alvarez:I mean, it's just, what would you have?

1:09:57Joe Santagato:Yo, I'm going to say something real honest for a sec. You ready? Yeah. I think that every restaurant now you could basically order for takeout sucks. What? I fucking hate that concept. What? Certain food just doesn't travel well. So back in the days where the only stuff you can get for delivery was basically... Like fast food? No. But back in the day, the only food you can get for delivery was Chinese and pizza. That was it. Like, if you want it, like, tacos don't travel well. You know what I mean? Like, Italian doesn't travel well.

1:10:41Frank Alvarez:Yeah, but you're supposed to know that and, like, think about that and not order that then.

1:10:46Joe Santagato:Yeah, but now every restaurant now has the option for takeout, and I feel like that sucks. Well, what sucks? That they have the option? Yeah. Why does that suck? Because I don't want them to have that. I'm serious because like certain restaurants just be like no our food doesn't do well when it travels so like it's going to make us look bad if you order for takeout so we're just not gonna

1:11:10Frank Alvarez:offer that sure I don't I mean I think it would unless you're uh like a fine dining restaurant I think it would be foolish to be like well people order this is how people consume so so So if a restaurant, you know, had steak that delivered, would you order that for delivery? No. There you go. Because why? Doesn't travel well. There you go. You crushed it. You're crushing it.

1:11:36Joe Santagato:But then, but then, but then, but how is that? But how? But then they should, they should be like, we're not doing that because you. Yes. Honestly, I agree. The world was better when restaurants were just like, no, I'm not fucking doing that.

1:11:49Frank Alvarez:I also am a little, I guess, if I'm ordering something, I'm not expecting the full experience anyway. Yeah. Like, I don't care. It's so tough because, like, I have ordered, like, for delivery.

1:12:02Joe Santagato:You're a food snub?

1:12:02Frank Alvarez:Yeah, seems like it. Maybe a little. I don't think I'm a food snub, but, like, if something comes through, like, and it's not good, I'm turned off to that place.

1:12:12Joe Santagato:But I also at the same time I'm like oh I don't think That was a good representation of what I was Trying to get out of this

1:12:20Frank Alvarez:I can picture Frank so clearly Getting food that he ordered And taking a bite and going Dude yes It's fucking soggy

1:12:30Joe Santagato:Yo that's I'm not kidding If that's what you define as a food snob Yes I am But I can see that But like I guess But like there's certain food like let's use a fucking let's use like tacos as an example there are a lot of places that do like quesadillas, a quesadilla is supposed to be like kind of like a layer of crisp and then like the cheese and the fluff on the inside, you get it and it's all fucking, cause it's like it's staying in the speed box, I understand why it

1:12:57Frank Alvarez:happens, okay but that's important, because that's like buying a fake Gucci bag on Canal Street and being like, it's falling

1:13:05Joe Santagato:apart, it's like, you fucking got the fist one, but then And I don't, like, I am saying that it will turn me off to that place, but then I think, like, oh, that's probably not what's representative of the food that they're trying to make. So, like, I kind of wish they just didn't do that.

1:13:20Frank Alvarez:You know what's a good judge of a place? When you, not like a fast food, but a restaurant burger, and they send you a burger via takeout, if they put the buns separate in a separate container, that's a good place. I have come across zero places that have ever done that. I've had one place that does it, that's a good place. so it doesn't so it doesn't get soggy yeah it's a I opened it and went oh this is the best place ever I had the opposite effect it's like oh this place is they care

1:13:46Joe Santagato:I don't even like think about that I don't really care much about that right because like if it's bread it's soft like it's in my opinion a good wet burger is gonna get the bread soggy anyways like I don't need like you know like a super crisp and crunchy I'm also weird with burgers like I kinda don't like them to be too tall yeah who likes that like when like listen I know it's a good bread, but like when people like, have you guys seen those TikToks where it's like people making fun of like millennial burger joints? Yeah. And it's like, they're not called appetizers. They're called shareables.

1:14:19Joe Santagato:Yeah. Handhelds, you know, like everything is like red brick and everything and exposed just like this, like exposed venting. But when it's like a burger and then it comes on a brioche bun, that's like, it adds like six inches to the thing. Yeah, I'm good. I'm like, come on, dude. Just give me just kind of like, again, and maybe it's because I grew up going to like diners that were kind of a bit of a hole in the wall sometimes. It could be a flat sesame seed bun and I'm fine with that. Yeah. Like when you fuck up the ratio of meat to bun, fuck you.

1:14:54Frank Alvarez:So if you, when you order like a pasta, right, and it shows up and it's not hot. Not that it's freezing, but like, are you like, this is fucking bullshit?

1:15:06Joe Santagato:No, I don't think like temperature. I mean, I'm not pumped about it when it comes cold.

1:15:12Frank Alvarez:Yeah.

1:15:13Joe Santagato:You know, I am like, I hate to say this, though. I do like leave reviews and comment.

1:15:19Frank Alvarez:Oh, no, you're a Yelp guy.

1:15:21Joe Santagato:Not a Yelp guy. I'm not. I haven't done it a lot. I've done it twice. And the only two times it was because it was the same restaurant consistently. instantly so then i was just like i'm done fuckers i don't i i left a review and i did and i deleted the app i didn't like wait for someone to hit me up i left a review and i just said like yo listen i'm done with this fucking app i'm done with this place because like their food was great and now i'm getting the food like i would get like wings undressed in sauce i would get food just fucking cold yeah you know i got like once i got like a smoothie for for myself or becca or something and it came like completely like you know when smoothies melt and they separate yeah like that so like at that point i know i'm not being like a you know this place needs to close i'm just saying like yo my experience was disappointing i'm not asking for anything so bye and i fucking and i delete the app i'm not like a yelper that's like i'm gonna tear these people apart they need to make it right yeah you said there was two they were both for the same

1:16:24Frank Alvarez:restaurant the same issue he wrote different things no for the same issue have you ever

1:16:28Joe Santagato:ever left a review no but yo can i ask a question i get why like like fucking cereal yelpers are an issue i get that yeah but like with like these food delivery apps isn't that not like contributing into some degree to like the success of the app or the restaurant uh yeah i mean i i i just wouldn't

1:16:50Frank Alvarez:that's the only difference like i think yes because i would say that like Like, I'm okay with people giving a rating of the restaurant. When people write words, that's nuts to me. Yeah, I always lean towards the, oh, you probably did something wrong. But, like, with anything. I mean, it's not exclusive to restaurants. Like, I think, like, any sort of review outside of, like, I guess technology or something. Or I don't know. Like, I think, I don't know. Maybe I don't even mean that.

1:17:23Joe Santagato:I don't know. I just, cause like, I definitely like, I'm not even going to lie. Like I feel like PRG post post review guilt, you know, where it's just like, who do I think I am? What am I doing? But then I come back to the like, oh, but this is what, like, this is the feedback that people need. Like imagine a world where like, we're doing the podcast or you're doing, or we're doing comedy or whatever. And everyone's just going like, they either tell you it's good or they don't say anything. you would want to be like, yo, someone needs to kind of be honest and real with me a little bit here. And I'm not doing it for the sense of, like, getting something out of it.

1:18:02But, like, and I'm not doing it a lot.

1:18:05Joe Santagato:I've done it twice. But, like, there is a justification in my head that, like, I am doing something that, like, is beneficial to someone to some degree.

1:18:15Frank Alvarez:I just, I guess it really just depends. I mean, the general feeling of people who leave detailed reviews is very pretentious to me. You know what I mean? There's this air around people being like, oh, well, I had a bad experience at this restaurant, so I'm going to write a bunch of whatever. Like, oh, the waitress didn't fill our waters or whatever. Little stuff like that. I mean, if I go to a restaurant and I don't have a good experience, I'm just not going to go back.

1:18:45Joe Santagato:Well, I've never done this for going into a place and dining and then leaving. Yeah. I've never done that. And I don't see myself doing that because, yes, I'm under the same mentality. If I don't like it, I'll just be like, I'm never going there again. Yeah. But, like, even that is a form of a feedback. So, like, when you –

1:19:03Frank Alvarez:I was furious and I needed to let someone know. But, like, my point is, like, what is the thing that you're trying to do with the review? You're trying to be like, fuck you, right?

1:19:13Joe Santagato:Not fuck you, but just like, I don't know what is going on, but this was my experience and it was disappointing. Did you call them?

1:19:21Frank Alvarez:No, no, no. It was through the app. Oh, I would much rather call them and be like, bro, you guys fucked this up.

1:19:27Joe Santagato:No, because in my opinion, if I'm doing that, then I'm talking to a representative and it's like, it's either that person's just going to be like, oh, this isn't for me, whatever. I don't give a fuck. you know like when it gets like do those like food apps like whoever runs the restaurant the manager or whatever could see that and be like all right this is we could use this to like be better and like and eventually they actually emailed me like they are so you're trying to help

1:19:54Frank Alvarez:i mean he's a hero you're you're trying to fix the the establishment i'm trying to be a martyr

1:20:04Joe Santagato:and like if if this is the cross i must bear in order to make somebody else's dining experience better yeah but you I'm joking I'm doing that I'm just gonna I'm gonna pull you into this so at our

1:20:14Frank Alvarez:diner uh we we read a review and the the review just said these are your people so you can't judge them no no don't fucking your people don't fucking your people because I am not doing this

1:20:24Joe Santagato:I've done it twice in fucking years of having you won't run you wrote one review you wrote them all

1:20:31Frank Alvarez:fuck you I'm gonna kill you the diner uh the review said the eggs were all right but the The waitress had a fat ass. Okay, come on. What? And like, so something like that is like, well, unless it's like for a joke.

1:20:44Joe Santagato:I don't think so. I mean, don't even fucking loop me in with those people.

1:20:49Frank Alvarez:Obviously, you're not looped in with those people.

1:20:51Joe Santagato:Like, I'm not sitting, I'm sitting there and I'm being like, yo, this was my experience, whether it be because, like, I'm not saying it's like someone needs to be held accountable. Like, those are the people that pissed me off. I knew someone in college and they got fired from their job for a bad Yelp review. I think unless it's a prolonged issue, I think that's fucking crazy. But if you're writing a review, whether it be for a restaurant or for whatever, it shouldn't be just like, you should be ashamed. Someone needs to be held accountable. It should just be like, yo, I got my food. This was an issue that happened with my food.

1:21:26Joe Santagato:I don't know whose fault it is, but maybe you need to address this. yeah that's it yeah i think like to be honest again i'm not a serial reviewer but like i think that that does have value to some degree if i mean if i was a business owner of a restaurant or something i would value that shit you but if like yes but also like this is like and this is

1:21:51Frank Alvarez:all the other this is why i just don't partake is because i don't know how much of an effect i can

1:21:55Joe Santagato:have it's not even about having i don't want because you might not ever see the fruits of

1:22:00Frank Alvarez:your labor like you you know but i'm but i'm saying like if the place got shut down because people are like you know because that happens to places especially now with like tiktok and the food reviewers people go into a place they have a bad experience to make a video about it the shit goes viral this place is fucked now yeah because you because you had a bad experience and like oh the food was not blah blah like this has happened i've watched it happen to certain places where like an influencer goes in and like either tells a story that isn't true or talks about you know whatever or like oh this is definitely like not what they say it is or whatever and the people have to defend themselves and hope that they're seeing as many people as them and like that's why i'm like when it comes to restaurants because by the way when it comes to hotels or it comes to airlines or whatever i'm fucking in that email letting them have it because who cares they have

1:22:47Joe Santagato:what okay what is the difference between that and what i'm not shutting down the airline they're just giving me shit for free if if if my one review for a food item shuts down the restaurant

1:22:58Frank Alvarez:there is a bigger issue at play i mean i think that restaurants are just there's way more turnover in the restaurant business than there is with the hotel and like because it's not boutique hotels it's like a hotel and an airline like a restaurant if i go in there and i write a review and i'm like

1:23:14Joe Santagato:there was a fucking mouse in the soup but i'm not but i'm not putting it on for parade like i'm not taking my review and just being like everyone look look look look i'm not accusing you of that i know that's why i stay out of it but but even even like i know you're not accusing me of that but like in that example like you can kind of wade through some of the bullshit like and like you as as a normal average consumer can kind of wade through wade through some of that bullshit but like it's almost subjective if you're like yo like let's use chicken wings an example i got chicken wings i i got the buffalo sauce there was no sauce on these wings that's an objective issue and like that's something that someone can pinpoint just be like guys as a staff let's just do this a little bit

1:23:55Frank Alvarez:more better so the thing the thing that would cross my mind is like the buffalo buffalo wings show up without the buffalo sauce i don't think that's indicative of the restaurant so like me You're leaving a review and being like – Who else is it indicative of? Like I think it was a mistake. Yes, and the mistake is made by whom? Yeah, but if I write a review of saying like my wing showed up without the sauce, then doesn't that make other people reading that go, oh, either this restaurant is careless in the way that they pack their food or this is how they serve their wings?

1:24:26Joe Santagato:Well, to be clear, it happened several times and then I left a review because I was just like, all right, I thought maybe the first time it was a mistake. Maybe the second time it was a blunder. The third, fourth, fifth time.

1:24:38Frank Alvarez:I would say that that's just how they're served, probably.

1:24:40Joe Santagato:No, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Because I've gotten them dozens of times before.

1:24:46Frank Alvarez:Got it. You know what I mean? I would just call them and be like, yo, you guys gave me wings and there's no sauce. What's going on here? Like, can you either send the sauce or, you know, refund it?

1:24:54Joe Santagato:Yeah, but that's not, but if it's through like DoorDash or Uber Eats or something like that. Oh, they're even better. They send it like this.

1:25:00Frank Alvarez:Yeah.

1:25:00Joe Santagato:They refund you quick. Yeah, you go, that's what I'm saying. Like, I would rather that. And that's what I am saying there. Yeah. So like in those circumstances, like that's, that is an objective piece of like, oh, something did, a mistake was made. Yeah.

1:25:16Frank Alvarez:Let's, let's, let's fix this. Well, that's the difference. If a mistake is made, I'll call the restaurant and be like, you guys made a mistake and we'll figure out if they can either refund something or send it, you know, I forgot this or whatever. Done that. There was, there was one time I saw my pizza delivery being, uh, coming down the block and it was this person on the back of a Vespa and the pizza, just horizontal. Vertical. Oh, like... Like they were holding it under their arm like a briefcase. So you got it and it was just up against the fucking... Dude, I saw them coming down the street.

1:25:44Frank Alvarez:I opened the door again. I said, guys, order another pizza. Yeah. They came, boxed. So in a situation like that... Well, it really depends where I am too. Like, if I'm ordering pizza and it's just me, I'm going to eat whatever shows up. Okay. I don't care what... I wish... I hope I still have a picture. But if it was something like that, I would call the restaurant and be like, hey, like your guy served me a pizza that was completely up against the side of the thing. Like, can we get another pizza going and make sure it's straight this time? And I would just wait for it. But if I leave a review and be like this pizza showed up and it was fucked up and blah, blah, blah.

1:26:19Frank Alvarez:That could potentially like people are going to read that review and go, oh, this place serves fucked up pizza. I'm not going there.

1:26:23Joe Santagato:I found the review.

1:26:25Frank Alvarez:Oh, my God. Please read it. Please.

1:26:27Joe Santagato:And I'm just reading it and I sound a little more cunty than I think I meant to be. I'm going to read it. I'm going to read it. Okay. I'm going to read it. It's from January 10th of 2025. Oh, we're coming up on the fucking anniversary. One year anniversary. Yeah. I put the thumbs down. Didn't like. The order was for 15 piece wings, buffalo, and a milkshake. Oh, we're going big. You go big, you go home. Yeah. You know? And here's what I wrote. Kind of milkshake. Probably. It definitely wasn't for me. because I'm not a big milkshake guy. It was probably for Becca, so chocolate.

1:27:05Frank Alvarez:Nice.

1:27:06Joe Santagato:And I quote. I will obviously be omitting the name of the place. Yeah. Second time in a row that they didn't sauce the wings. Didn't sauce the wings? Verb. It's been a recurring issue, and I gave it one more shot after last time. So far, so good. So far, so good. Okay. Here's where. This place has had a steep drop in quality. Jeez.

1:27:33Joe Santagato:and the place won't let me request additional sauce because that's what i tried to do i tried to like go like under like special you know how it'd be like special requests and like you get some of the places i'll be like they don't take special requests so right basically

1:27:52Joe Santagato:unfortunately i'll no longer be ordering from in this place. Name of this place. I would give it zero stars if I could. Because, like, the lowest you could give is one star.

1:28:03Frank Alvarez:Yeah. The fact that you made me give one is sickening. That's not that bad. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. That's not bad. I found the other one.

1:28:12Joe Santagato:Is the other one bad? It's for a Spanish place. Okay. Empanadas and yucca fries were solid, but everything else was flavorless and bland. That was bad. Who does that help? That one's cunty. That one's bad. I'm a bitch there. I'll agree on that one. That one sucks. That one sucks. Everything else was flavorless and bland. Yucca fries, really? Unbelievable. One of my favorites. So they had reached out to me. Which, the Spanish place? No, the other place.

1:28:49Frank Alvarez:The wing, the sauceless place. Sauceless wing. Yeah. Didn't sauce the wing.

1:28:52Joe Santagato:And they had reached out five days later, but I had deleted the app and I swore off I would never use it again. Right. Ten days later. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They wrote, so this is terrible. Your feedback is what makes us better at the end of the day. With your feedback, we're going to add extra sauce as an option. Not getting your wing sauce is concerning, and we will address it with our kitchen. Here's some money if you want to order again from us. And they sent me, how much did they send me? $25. They did the right thing. Did you? Honestly, I don't think I ever ordered from them again.

1:29:34Frank Alvarez:It'd be so funny if they kept your name, you did it again, no sauce. Bro, if I was that place, I would have sent 15 chicken bones. I was going to say, I would have said uncooked chicken. It would just be no meat, no sauce, just bones. Just bones and the sauce, no meat.

1:29:53Joe Santagato:so 15 sauces too bad right no no no well I do know people that are like I know like I said I know someone that got fired from a Yelp review and it was the funniest thing I've ever read the review was just like we came in like an hour before closing and this person was pissed so they threw the menus at us shit like that yeah they deserve to get fired that kind of stuff like

1:30:15Frank Alvarez:I think is fine like things that aren't a mistake you know like if the food is cold or you forgot something i think those are mistakes people mistreating you like i agree that's totally

1:30:27Joe Santagato:different the only place that the weight staff has like their bulletproof is at diners these people you they should they rose honestly it's almost better if they're more miserable and they hate you because if you get like a happy person at a diner not getting the diner sucks you need a What do you want? We don't have that shit. We don't, like, and I'm not talking, like, Dick's Last Resort. You remember that place?

1:30:58Frank Alvarez:No.

1:30:58Joe Santagato:You don't remember? It was, like, a chain restaurant, like, Hooters, where, like, you walk in and the people are just like, all right, what do you want, small cock? And they'd write, like, fucking, like, you know. Loser. Loser on a hat and put it on a person. Yeah. I'm not talking that. I'm talking, like, a legitimately miserable person that's worked at the same diner since the 50s.

1:31:16Frank Alvarez:Yeah. Put a cigarette on me But give me my lumberjack special You know what I mean?

1:31:22Joe Santagato:Lumberjack special? What the fuck is that? Is that like

1:31:25Frank Alvarez:A lumberjack breakfast

1:31:26Joe Santagato:Is that like pancakes? Pancakes Sausage links Bacon Eggs Toast See now I'm hungry It's the new year Now I gotta go now I've been on my new year's resolution kick And eating like a fucking deer So any talk about pizza And then this And bowling Now I'm hungry

1:31:44Frank Alvarez:Get this kid in a bowling alley I'm gonna let him run wild but yeah that's all we have for today's episode folks

1:31:50Joe Santagato:thanks for tuning in Frank where can they find you the Frank Alvarez all over social media and then Patreon patreon.com slash the basement yard and yeah

1:31:59Frank Alvarez:and where can then add a chance you guys can go follow me at Joe Santagato go follow the show at the basement yard on TikTok and Instagram that is all I'm kidding do you want to say what your thing is just kidding again

1:32:08Joe Santagato:you can find Ant at tbytourmerch.com tbytourmerch.com yeah

1:32:16Frank Alvarez:see you guys next time

1:32:31Frank Alvarez:fall never arrives all at once

1:32:33Joe Santagato:first the air then the light and slowly the things you love begin to find each other a jacket meets a dress A hoodie slips beneath a blazer. An old cap finds a new scarf. Because you don't simply step into the season. You create it layer by layer until it finally feels like fall. Find fall your way at Ross.