Abbey & Peter Crouch: The One Word That Starts Arguments (And Why It Never Means What You Think).

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2:36I would have cancelled if you were really ill, but for me, it's Boy Cries Wall. Fine. Oh my goodness, I know that face. To what we say into here once a week. Shut up, you got with him, you like football, deal with it. Peter Crouch. What about your cheeky finger? Oh, right, right. I quite enjoy those. They're great. Partial. You're disgusting.

3:04Hello and welcome to The Therapy Crouch with me, Abbey Clancy. Me, Peter Crouch. And me, Gaz. How are we doing? I've set myself up. on you Ross, don't you think Gaz looks like Alfie? Yeah, a little bit, yeah. Which Alfie? The womaniser? The Michael Caine film? No. They're my best friend. Oh right, okay. Not Jude Law, honey, sorry. I can dream. So we need to address why we've got the same outfit on today. No idea really. We just, we met in different cars and we had the same clothes on. I've been clearing out my annex where it's basically an overspill of my wardrobe. So I was in there for hours yesterday and I just found like a few new things.

3:47These are straight out of the box. Yeah, you know one of those? I said, are they new trainers? They look lovely. They do look really nice. I was just like, they're just like two years old. They are, they? Up in the annex. I just found them. They're fucking brand new. Yeah, but I've never worn them. I found them. I forgot I had them. It's a good fit check. I like both your styles. Yeah. You're rocking it. Cashmere. Who wore it best? Who wore it best? Put a poll out. Let's get a poll out. So what have we been up to babe? Got any weekly wines first of all? I've got a weekly shine for you. Oh my god.

4:21Must have been good. Mother's Day. So the day before we went to our friend's 50th. And it was also Sophia's birthday. And it obviously got a bit messy. So Mother's Day I was allowed to basically stay in bed all day. And then Pete got a chef to the house. So I just walked down the stairs, ate my food and went back to bed. So it was literally the dream scenario for me because as I spoke on the other pod, like for me, I wanted my house spotless, which it wasn't. Having to do no cooking and cleaning on Mother's Day was amazing. Yeah. That's what I thought. Like I knew we'd have a big one on Saturday night and it was our mate's 50th, which we'll get into.

5:03We did it all for Wall Street. It was amazing. And then the next day I thought we're not even going to want to go out, let alone make something. So yeah, we were lucky enough to get a chef. A friend of mine owns a catering company. Oh, nice. Caper and berry. Oh, it's phenomenal. I've got the box of brownies next to my bed. Oh yeah? That are just, you will die. I'll give you one later. They're in bed, don't even tell me that. I had two of them last night. In bed? Yeah. Wow. Melt in your mouth. Yeah, the whole thing was phenomenal, wasn't it? And the kids loved it. Panopies, starters, roast, tiramisu, pavlova.

5:38So a chef comes up, does he use all your utensils or does he come pre-cooked? A bit of both. Okay, all right. A bit of both. He used our hob and our oven. Okay. Yeah, and our plates and things. I was appalled. He brought the food. No, he brought plates. I was appalled because I didn't even set the table. It was just like no table matter. It was just like a knife and fork plonked on the table. The classic. And just eating. But it was just... Can't we have him every day? He's so nice. No. That's my shine and wine. My wine is. Why haven't we got him every day? Because it's not cheap. I was like, Pete, hide his keys.

6:13He's moving in. Just leave him. He's got to stay. It was top notch. Like, what an amazing thing to do. Oh, my God. It's lovely. You played a blinder there. Well done. Yeah, I started well on my mum's day. Yeah. Even though I'm not your mum. No, not my mum. Yeah, the kids had a nice day as well, didn't they? Yeah. We had a good night the night before. Weekly wine for you. I don't think I've got much, really. No, I think bizarrely we've got one well this week. Bizarrely. I know, yeah. We have, though. Usually, you know, I'll say a wine and then you just unload on me, like four or five, but I don't think we're okay, eh?

6:47It's a unified week. I'm sure you'll find one. Shall I try and find one? That's right. What abuse have you got about me in your notes? Yeah, I've got one weekly wine. It's mainly just Abigail's volatility. It's just a bit volatile. It's just like, for instance, you said you weren't going to the party because I think, you know, I did something wrong. I wasn't your friend for some reason. You weren't my friend, I don't know. You made something up. And then you went, right, I'm not going to the party. I know why I wasn't going to the party. Because it was Sophia's birthday and we went, we had a lovely day.

7:25We went into London. She got her ears pierced. We got absolutely rinsed in the shop. we went to this ear piercing and I didn't know that you had to pay for, you get your ears pierced. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You have to pay for the piercing and pay for each earring individually. Okay, okay. Which I've never known that in my life. Have you? Well, I haven't got much pierced. What was it like Claire's accessories back in the day? What was that? Yeah, it was. Was that just like a tenner and they do the whole thing? Exactly. No, it definitely wasn't that. It was a hundred times that. Oh my God. Yeah. Okay.

7:57Yeah. So you got absolutely bamboozled there. got bamboozled. First of all, the whole fucking rigmarole of it all. So I booked it. Then they were like, you can't, we can't do it because you're, so we had to bring ID, birth certificate. Pete was in, is that going to be your weekend? Yeah, so this is, this is the problem, right? So this is what I'm talking about, like being volatile. There's three things that happened and one of them was, well, I'm about to tee off. But I think it all stemmed from the fact I went to Cheltenham on Thursday. Yes, yeah. And I came back later than she imagined. Maybe later than she imagined.

8:29I had one Live 360 and the Vicky was saying it almost stuck in traffic. This Live 360 is not for me, by the way. It's for our children. She keeps saying Live 360 as if it's a normal thing. Like, I was checking him on Live 360. That's a violation of my privacy. The FBI. It's a total violation. No, Riley told me to check. You keep telling that as well. You keep throwing Riley and Lucinda off. Because I don't think of it for that. Yeah, and they go, well, just check Live 360. Because you're like, oh, babe, I can't wait to see. I can't wait to go home. We're just stuck in traffic. We're just waiting for the car.

8:59You're in the fucking Vic. You were in the Vic. And then, double bamboozled, because Riley was in there having lunch with her husband, having dinner with her husband, and saw you there. And he was stuck in traffic. I was stuck in traffic for a little bit, then I went for a quick beer after. I didn't need a debrief from the day. Yeah, but it's not about the time. It was like, I was home at 8pm. I'm like, it's not about the time. Bear in mind, I had the sick bug. I was in bed two days ill. Oh, really? And I don't understand why he wouldn't rush home to see if I was okay. We've gone from a weekly shine now for her gazumping my weekly wine with another one and me.

9:37Listen, right, so there's that. No, he was doing that. He was doing that thing when I was lying, dying in bed. Oh, I'm not going to go to Cheltenham. Should I cancel it? Should I cancel it? I couldn't even speak. I would have cancelled it. You didn't. Well, I had work to do there. You didn't. You didn't have work. I would have cancelled if you were really ill. but for me it's Boy Who Cries Wolf. Oh, here we go. Yeah, it is because it's like, you know, you're always ill on the day. So vomiting, I can fake vomit, can I? Yeah, but you know, it's one of those. It's like, you're fine, fine, fine. You know, if I was picking up the kids, you'd be right as rain.

10:14But because I was going to Cheltenham, it was like, you know, and it just feels like Boy Who Cries Wolf a little bit. How have we got from there to there? We've developed. And I'm not even finished. Because I've just remembered all this shitty pussy dress. Honestly, right. So Cheltenham, I think that was the stone of it all. Anyway, this ear piercing thing I've thought, her honour ID that she had was Clancy. Obviously a passport. So when I renewed my passport, our holiday guy, he renewed it in my old name and just because Clancy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So gets to this effing ear piercing place. They're like, we need confirmation that you're her mother.

10:52and I was going to throw the old Google me out, but I didn't. Would have saved us. No, but because I was a bit like, I could prove to you that. I did throw it in. I did throw it in to the woman. I called her. But I was like, I can prove to my daughter because I can just go in a press article and you can see she's my daughter. Right. I also had a letter from the doctor. Pete was in the loft searching for birth certificates instead of playing golf. I had a tee-off time in 15 minutes and I'm in the loft, right? So I'm sweating. Never looked so quick in all my life. Then you're like, have you seen the mess you've left up there by the way?

11:24And you've turned the boiler off. Then she said, I turned the boiler off by mistake with my arm. I'm moving all these fucking boxes. No hot water for days. Something wrong with the plumb around. Oh, you've turned the boiler off. Do you know what happened though? So there's these boxes. He's pulled out the box. These boxes are behind like the tank. So I've pulled this box and I felt like I've hit something with my elbow. And I went, that doesn't look like I've moved anything. But I thought to myself, I might have. But then I could have. And then I went away and then another, it wasn't even coming out anywhere for days.

11:55No water. Literally no water. He's turned it off. He's turned it off my elbow. You hadn't put those fucking boxes behind the tank. Yeah, but I'm packing to move. I'm packing to move. It's all organised and you've rummaged through every box and it's a mess of playing out. It's like 15 minutes to find a birth certificate. Yeah. And then she's like, well, you're going to have to bring it up to London. You're going to have to come and sit with her because so they know it's you or her dad. Right. Dr. Rona had to write me a letter to say, I can verify that you're Sophia's, they're both patients of mine.

12:30I can verify that she's Sophia's mom. But there was one moment where I was making me drive up. Like, so I'm saying, but like, I know this sounds terrible. Yeah. But the lads are on the tee. And if I don't go, this is like, it's ruining their whole day as well. You put Sophia's birthday. They're like, well, you're going to ruin your daughter's day. Yeah, but it's a tough call. It's a tough call. It's Sophie's choice. It really is. I don't want to ruin my daughter's day. And you know, I've booked this in a long time ago. But this happened previously to us in Bicester. They wouldn't pierce this because of the same thing.

13:04Oh, really? Yeah. What a palaver that is. What's, yeah. It's like. You know in Spain, they come out the front and literally give birth, go bang. Yeah, yeah. But the thing is, it's like, even if I wasn't a mom and I was getting her ear bit. I'm not buying class A drugs. We're getting our ears pierced. Do you know what I mean? By a professional. Yeah, it's just so ridiculous. So I was fuming and then I got stung with a£1 ,300 bill. Oh my God. Is that how much it is? Yeah. Because we've got these bloody bracelets, these welded bracelets and I thought... That is cute. It is cute, but I didn't even think to ask for the price because I thought, what will that be?

13:4050 quid? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 200 each. Four of them. My God. Fair play. Yeah. What the hell, you've absolutely been rinsed there. Rinsed. One earring was 400 quid. Jesus. And it's already been done, so it wasn't like a go. Right, take them out now. Oh my God, yeah, you can't go back, can you? It's outrageous. But since when would you have to buy one individual earring? Yeah. Pay twice? That's outrageous. Yeah, they're having me off there. Get yourself down to Claire's Accessories. What's wrong with that? Nothing. Dotty P's. Do you know what? I'm going to open my own pierce and bloody, shut up, I'll be a bloody multimillionaire.

14:17You've done it once before. You pierced my eyebrow once, didn't you? Oh, yeah. No way. What's the story there? What happened? I did like a World Cup show and we were just doing dangerous things. I jumped out of a plane. I went skateboarding with Jamie Redknapp. Remember that? I was supposed to go shark diving with John Terry. Oh, my God. I think it was COVID time, wasn't it? So we couldn't do it in the end. Oh, okay. We did weird things. and then one of them was Abby pierced my eyebrow. Oh my God. But you actually got to do it? Yeah. Jesus. I know. So I never really got to the bottom of the volatility.

14:54First it was the golf and then it was the right I'm not going to the party. But she says it to me and I've known her for a long time now. She goes, there's no way in the world I'm going to the party. And I said, yeah, no worries. You are though. She said, I'm not going. No way. And then half an hour later she said, Pete, I need you to get back. She's got the makeup girl coming around. for the party tonight? Nice, nice. How's that? Talk me through your wine process there when you're not going. I was just feeling abandoned. But why? Cheltenham, when you didn't want to come home, then golf, you wouldn't come to London.

15:26Then I stayed in a hotel away from you, which I don't do. And I was just like assessing our marriage in bed. Yeah, yeah. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. I'm not going to the party with him. So yeah. But then I got home, I'm sorry. And now you give me a week to shy. I forgive you for that. Because I know, you know, I just think women in general are a bit like that. Say things like, it's like what Riley was saying about golf, because I think Alex played. Alex comes home. Twice. Riley goes. Played golf twice in two days, by the way. Don't big him up too much. And then it was like that one.

16:04She said, fine. So you asked her, you play golf two and two. And she said, fine. That's not a yes. Fine is not you. Fine is not you. What is that? Fine. Fine means no. It's all been through that. It's like a second language, isn't it? You've got to like decode. But also, our friend can go like this to a husband and he will do it. Yeah. But if I went like that to you, you'd go. And then carry on for the doing the robot somewhere. Fine. You know what I've realised is fine is not fine. Fine is not, definitely don't go. Yeah. What actually is fine. But it's like when a man says to you, oh, do a lot nicer, he goes, yeah, you look fine.

16:50That you may as well say, you look like a complete dog. Fine is not. That's true. You walked in and I went, you look fine. Fine is. It sounds wrong, doesn't it? It just sounds wrong. You look fine. What is the definition? What is the actual definition of fine? Yeah, because if I said like, oh, she looks fine. She went, oh, she looks fine. Oh, yeah. Do you know what I mean? You got that kind of fine. Yeah, that works. You look fine. Yeah, you've got fine. And you've got fine. And you go, you look fine. And then you've got, do you mind if I go fine? Yeah. I wouldn't say it like that. I go fine. Oh, fucking hell.

17:25I know that face. That little, what's that one? That little, that little, the tongue. Fine.

17:36What is the definition of fine? I think it's like adequate. Yeah, perfectly adequate or something. Yeah. Perfectly adequate is not the common. How do I look, babe? Fine. I are. You're not on that urban dictionary though, are you? Oh, did you hear about this? No. We were on it yesterday, weren't we? Oh, how funny. Yeah, we were on that yesterday. Yeah, funny. You know, you can just go like anything. Oh, I know. Like anything and it turns into something. Like Rachel says. Go on. So the informal meaning is satisfactory or pleasing. There you go. Satisfactory. It's not a good word, is it? Yeah. Lots of different meanings, I suppose.

18:16High quality. This was a fine piece of film. Fine wine. Like a fine piece of filmmaking means high quality. Yeah. Or fine as in like a thin. How is the word fine used in sarcasm?

18:34but much if you had a snug and you said how was that and i went fine fine that was fine like it's basically like it didn't offend me it was fine it wasn't great but it was it was satisfactory you won't believe this of urban diction read i was doing everyone's surnames done clancy genuinely clancy's a beautiful girl who has the best sense of humor and the cutest laugh in the world compare that to crouch which was It's like a big stone or something. Oh, it's something to be dropping the soap in the shower. That's basically what that was. Yeah, it was. The crowds. That was the urban dictionary. I can see you dropping the soap.

19:09Really? Yeah. I would drop it. Yeah. You'd definitely drop it. Yeah, I will. Yeah, probably. A reluctant agreement. Fine. Have it your way. It means I disagree, but I'm tired of arguing. an annoyance or displeasure when fine is used in a one word answer it frequently acts as a polite mask for this is not okay dismissal often used to mean i've lost faith in you i'm done with this topic this all fine so i'm just going to describe you as fine now because all of these things apply to you in a business in a business context it means mediocre unexciting or unimpressive and a warning that the customer is not satisfied.

19:51That's fine. Sarcastic fine is characterised by a lack of enthusiasm, a flat tone and a sharp exhale. Fine. Fine. Fine. Or a forced smile. Brilliant. What about the cheeky finger? Fine. Pardon? Oh, right. Got to be lost there for a second. I quite enjoy those. Shut up. They're great. It's partial.

20:19They're great. That's all you just said. You're disgusting. Right, go on, give me some audience wines then. Audience wines. We went off on a million tangents then. Yeah, we did, yeah. But, safe to say, I did go to the party. And how did it look, Pete? Fantastic. I've heard about this party. She looked fantastic. Wow, she looked good. Fun! So the thing was Wolf of Wall Street, right, so we did recreate that famous scene. He kept recreating it. He kept doing this like advanced robot. It's giving me the massive ick. This one? Oh yeah. How many times do you think you did that? Loads. Loads. It went down well first time, but I strong did it.

20:58What is the costume for Wall Street? Is it pink dress? It's basically like businessmen and hoes. Okay. It's kind of what we went with. I'm all for it. Peter recreated the famous scene. I wore the pink off the shoulder dress of the shoes and people Leonardo's suit with the red tie, the blue shirt. And we gelled his hair, sprayed it, but I forgot my phone. So I didn't take any photos. I really got it. Did you say the line? I'm not fucking leaving. Did you say that? Did you? On the mic as well. Well done. Well done. You weren't in there at the time. I could just imagine you in the other room. I was outside with the smokers going, Oh, he's got the mic again.

21:44It's fine. Oh, well, I really enjoyed it. The three people I was talking to enjoyed it.

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22:42Head to oliveandjune.com slash DIYGel20 and use code DIYGel20 for 20 % off your first gel mani system. That's oliveandjune.com slash DIYGel20. Code DIYGel20 for 20 % off your first gel mani system. History shows women keep showing up for everyone, every day. But who's showing up for you? Grow Therapy helps you put your mental health first. with therapy that's covered by insurance and built to support you. Whether it's your first time in therapy or your 50th, Grow makes it easier to find a therapist who fits you, not the other way around. You can search by what matters, like insurance, specialty, identity, or availability, and get started in as little as two days.

23:31There are no subscriptions, no long-term commitments. You just pay per session. Grow helps you find therapy on your time. Whatever challenges you're facing, Grow Therapy is here to help. Grow accepts over 100 insurance plans, including Medicaid in some states. Sessions average about$21 with insurance and some pay as little as$0, depending on their plan. Visit growtherapy.com slash ACAST to get started. That's growtherapy.com slash ACAST. growtherapy.com slash ACAST. Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plan. Right, audience line. Audience line. Okay, hi, Abby and Pete. I'd love your opinions on this.

24:15My partner has a football season ticket and wanted to know what you thought was an acceptable amount of time he goes per month. Although this is only two hours, it's the time before... Surely it's every week, isn't it? Yeah, every couple of weeks. Before and after the game, which turns into a 12-hour day out with his friends. He has a young child, and I feel like there needs to be a compromise as football takes over our weekends. Thanks. please keep me anonymous. I hear that. I actually said that exact same quote to Peter when he went to the pub after Chaldenham. It's 12 hours, not enough. Because it, like, to be fair though, you've got to see it from a woman's point of view.

24:54It's like you've been out all day, you've been with this same group, and you know, I've been home up for 12 hours with the kids. We hadn't hardly seen each other that week. I was staying away the next night, you know. But can I just say, I know it was eight hours, but it was like eight till eight. You know what I mean? It wasn't like a four in the morning job. I got home at 8.30. I always say this, like, when do you ever go out till four in the morning? No, never. That's an excuse every time. That's why I think I deserve, like, some credit. That's an excuse every time. It wasn't like I was in a nightclub out till four.

25:24I'm like, you're nearly 50, honey. You're not doing that anyway. I don't want to do that. But what I'm saying is, I think when I should come home at 8.30, it should be like, I think the red carpet should be rolled out for me. I bet you do. I do. I do. Bet you do. I do. I think you should be like, there's my boy. I fucking love him. There's my boy. Yeah. This is going to sound like I'm defending Pete, but you know when you've had a couple, even with your girls, you've had a couple, it's hard to then stop. So to be home on time, like for eight or something, it's pretty good, isn't it? Cause I feel like you could just roll the night away.

25:57Yeah. I don't know. It's not about the time. Yeah. It wouldn't matter if it was eight or one. it was just a bit like why didn't why he'd already been away from me for 12 hours why didn't he want to come back right yeah i did want to come back okay um i think the football thing but i you know it's similar to us because you work at the football it is hard because if they both work during the week and they've got a baby most families who don't work on the weekend it's kind of family time yeah so if he's going away to the football every weekend? So I think the compromise here is you go to home games only.

26:35Go to home games. Like, yeah, just do the home games. Does a season ticket apply to away games? No, so a season ticket will be only for home games. It'll be over the week. But, you know, if you club in the Champions League or something like that, there might be two home games a week. You know, I'll be a pick up. It's tricky, yeah. There's a lot of football. Why do people love football so much? I know. It's the national game. It's so weird. game no but that's it's like it's so loved isn't it by it's part of our identity as a nation you know some people have i was crying yeah i saw watching um that video of ronaldo in bed was he in bed or were you what was that video he was because i was quite appalled at those chelsea players who ignored the children oh the little babies were like so excited to see them and they all just arrogantly walk past with the headphones on.

27:29You wouldn't get that in your day, would you? Yeah. No, I thought they were an absolute screw. I know what you're saying. I think maybe some of them did, but I think some of them didn't see them. They were babies. They've all got headphones in and stuff like that. They shouldn't have a headphone. Who walked? I agree. In what walk of life do you walk anywhere with a big headphone on? It's only footballers coming off a bus and walking past children. It's the only time it happens. It's strange that's become normal, isn't it? It's not normal. It's just rude. You know, all these people are paying money to see them every week.

27:59The least he can do. Like, it's a controlled environment. There was, like, six little kids there. You can say hello to the kids. So then I saw this video of Ronaldo. People were running on the pitch mid-game, children crying their eyes out to Ronaldo. And he'd hug them and kiss them and be like, back away to all the security and let the child have the moment with him. And there was so many. And there was this little girl who was in the line-up and she didn't have Ronaldo. She was, like, tapping his leg. And then he just looked at her and smiled. and then she just burst into tears and then he gave her a hug.

28:28I've seen some of you. It was like a montage and I was crying my eyes out. He's so nice, Ronaldo. Don't you think? Yeah, but I'm sure there's been times where he's said no to people. Do you know what I mean? Well, there was about 50 clips of him saying, yeah. Yeah. Can you imagine, every time he leaves the door, he must have to take a photo of someone. Yeah. But my point is, it was really nice. Yeah, of course it was. You're good with the kids. Yes. to what we're saying to her once a week or once a month just grow up shut up you got with him you like football deal with it I wasn't expecting that Peter Crouch it's the national game put a sock in it I can't believe you're saying that would you say that to me do you remember last weekend I was telling you about the oyster guy at Fulham yeah yeah yeah he was in the party was he yeah and he messaged me You said you declined an oyster and caviar.

29:26I did, you know, I was having loads of fun, like, and he kept coming over and saying, can I have an oyster? Give me an oyster. And I was having loads of fun. Give me a break, mate. I've seen these people for ages. No. You only have to swallow it. I know, but I was, I was a little bit. Swallow it. I didn't fancy an oyster at that particular time. And I was having a, it was one of those where I was having a laugh and I didn't. I love that guy. He's amazing. I love him as well. I don't, you know, to clean your palate, I had to have a shot of vodka. Oh, God. Because bloody blood had eaten bloody oysters.

29:59She did a shot before the, yeah, because he gave it to my mate. I just wasn't in oyster territory, do you know what I mean? Like, it was, you've got to be in a mood for it. They're risky, aren't they? They're a risky game, I'd say. Yeah, I wasn't really in that mood. I love them. But yeah, I do, there are times where I love an oyster. No, listen, I'm only joking. I think there's a compromise here. You know. I am joking, I think. There needs to be a compromise. Some description. Just tone down the football as hutch. I think when you've got young children as well, it's not really fair to always leave them.

30:32As much as you want to. The smile. I know. It kills me. What? Pot. Pot there. Big black pot. I don't leave my children. No, you don't. You're a good boy. Thank you. My husband and I have just found out that we are pregnant. And after a few years of trying an IVF, is a true blessing and something we're very grateful for. However, we disagree on something. I'd like to find out the gender of the baby. Don't do it! And he doesn't. We both have our reasons. Mine consists of I should get my way for everything I've put my body through compared to the very small part he's played. But I suppose mentally...

31:10It really pisses me off when people find out. It really gets on my nerves. Does it? I can't cope. It's on your nerves. It really gets on my nerves. It's just like it's the only surprise you can have. Well, he's saying I like surprises. Earth, it's the only surprise you can't ruin. You wouldn't want a gender reveal oyster or something? Like a different coloured... No, we can't eat oysters when you're pregnant. Oh God, really? I know nothing. Did you even go to school? Did I go to school? Do you even know how to have sex? It's a common knowledge you can't have an oyster. Yes! Is it? You can't have anything raw.

31:37Yeah, it's like sushi kind of... And I think it would potentially give you food poisoning. You can't have sushi. She says, look, ultimately I'll pretend I like surprises, much like Abby, but really don't. And I'd rather know. How would you guys go about deciding what to do? But it's not that. It's the only surprise you get in your life. And nine months being pregnant is a long time. It's nearly a year. It's actually longer than nine months. It's 40 weeks. It's basically 10 months. Keeps you going, doesn't it? And those last few months are just, well, they were for me, like hellish, you know, without sounding ungrateful because it's an absolute miracle.

32:10You're just like, oh my God, I can't cope with this. And when you're in that room giving birth and you're scared and you're pushing, it just gives you this extra force to go to be strong, get it out, and the excitement overtakes. As you're pushing, like, what is it? What is it? Do we know? Do we know? That is exciting, isn't it? And it's the best feeling because, like, so far I was pregnant now, found out it's a girl. It's a girl. Then you've got nine months to wait, and the only benefit of that is I can buy a few pink baby grows. Yeah, yeah. You get the nursery ready or whatever. Yeah, but...

32:43That kind of, you know, Simba moment, you know? like what have we got? You're like that and you're looking and you're just like, oh my God, like, and whatever it is, you're just, oh my God. I really resent the fact that we found out with Johnny because Pete wanted to find out. We didn't find out with the two girls. And then Pete was like, I need to mentally prepare to see if we're having another girl. Like, I just need to know. Not that, and like, and if he was, like, cause they're also, you can't change it. You can't change what it is. It doesn't matter. as long as it's healthy god willing um and then pete found out and sophia was a baby and she said mommy i'm not going to tell you but you're going to be happy this time because it's different so she told me i found out and ab didn't know oh right five year old keep a secret she went um she went oh i think you'll be happy because it's different this time oh absolutely absolutely blew it up massively but the the surprise how i would have felt having a surprise with johnny that would have just been the best in the world yeah okay so you love the surprise i think the surprise is definitely the way to go yeah personally yeah i think she should go with her husband on this one uh i unfortunately laura i know you've wrote in and we'd like to be on your side but i think because we've done both and surprises were the best um yeah i think she's She's got to go with her husband on this one.

34:07Just trust us and find out with the second one. If I wanted to not find out, write in, tell us how she felt when she got that surprise. And if it was all worth it, because I promise you it will be. Do you know there's a lad at Brentford, right? Who's got a long throw in like Rory Dlap. Oh yeah. He threw, he took his missus to the football stadium. He threw the ball, like his long throw in, into the goal and it revealed the gender of the baby. oh do you think that's good can you imagine I said to you babe I'm taking you down to the Bet365 stadium is he a footballer yeah footballer did he do it during the game no just with no one in the stadium just them two no I hate anything to do with romance and football it just does not mix if I took you down to the stadium and sit with no one was there babe I'm going to launch this ball into the net and we're going to find out I'd be like why am I having a baby with you well that's what I thought no offence to this poor guy yeah Yeah, unreal.

35:06I couldn't believe it. I hate romance in football. Can you imagine someone - People get married there. Yeah, I know. At stadiums. Do you not like romance? Yeah, but that's it. If you were really into football as well, me and you were like massive, like, you know, Liverpool fans. And I took you cop-end and proposed. I know that seems so mental to you, but if you're into football - What was that show we had to like propose? What was it? Oh, yeah. The husband did it all. Yeah, the wedding one. Yeah, and she's like, whatever you do, don't do it. I think it was like Watford or like West Brom. She's like, do not do it at the football ground.

35:38And he did it at the football ground. If you did it at Watford and then Elton come out and sang the first dance. Oh, that would be iconic. That's a different story. That's a different story. But no, football and... Some of them are, some of those ones are terrible, aren't they? When the fellas organised Say yes to the dress or something. Something like that. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. Say yes to the dress. Have you seen the one where they do the tattoos? Yeah. Have you seen that one? Have you seen the guy who had all round here, the guy, he wrote all different sexual diseases all around his genitals.

36:07With tattoos. What? Yeah. Can you actually imagine? He said, mate, don't stitch me up too badly. And he wrote like chlamydia. Oh my God. All different sexual diseases all over. Genital warts, terpes. All the tattoos. Can you imagine? I've got to find it. That's unbelievable. It's a tattoo TV show. It's amazing. Yeah. Yes. You tattoo your mate. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he went, please mate, don't stick. Yeah, it's the biggest stitch up of all time. On his genitals or around? It's all around it. Oh my God. Oh my God. How could he not look while it was happening as well? No, they're blindfolded. Are they?

36:44Yeah. Unbelievable. I got a rare, I pretended I got my tongue pierced at nighty on the weekend. Yeah, she did, yeah. Oh yeah? Yeah. Well, we know that piercing shop they went to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To be honest, I wanted one, but I couldn't afford. Yeah, I bet you'd run out of money. Yeah, she was like, I said, there's no way you've, she was, she had it on there and FaceTime and she said, I've done this. And she was putting on this list. So you fell for a hug. I did, absolutely did not. There's no way. Because I know you, I don't think you could even watch someone get their tongue pierced, let alone get it done yourself.

37:22If you've bitten your tongue, it's the worst pain. Oh, yeah. It's like when you stand on a plug. You ever done that? Yeah, yeah. It's like standing on Lego and stuff, isn't it? The worst. It is rough. Middle of the night standing on Lego. Hell. Guys, I thought it was a good idea for like a main app. You guys could do this thing where you design each other's perfect day. So I've got some categories here, like location, the wake up time, what you have for breakfast, what you're doing for the day, these sorts of things. I'm going to throw them. I think this week, Pete, you should design abbeys. Do you know what?

37:51I should have written it down because I reckon I know what you'd plan for me. Really? Oh, that would have been good, like a Mr. and Mrs. And I'll be honest if you get it right. Okay, that's cool. And then you've got to rate it out of 10. Then we'll see how we go. Okay, Pete, right. Why don't you just write it down as a text message? Have you got your phone? No, it's all right. I'll tell you the truth. I won't lie. All right, fair play. Location and wake-up time. Where is she going to wake up? Where and what time? God, location. Is that anywhere in the world? Anywhere in the world. Her dream day.

38:27And you have to make this happen as well, by the way.

38:33Location. I'm going to go like, there's a place we went to in Mexico, Cabo. Is he without Hawaii? Nice. We wake up there, like, looking at the beach early. Because you'll find out why. In the next bit when I talk about breakfast. so what time what time you say we're gonna wake up at around depends on time difference and stuff but if we can get up at like eight that'd be perfect oh i said eight yeah okay oh that's good yeah i reckon about eight okay and brekkie yeah it's the full buffet it's the you know when you go to the hotel breakfast bucket buffet you go you go down and there's like you know if i can put this particular buffet in this kind of Carbo Hawaii hotel.

39:22Okay. What buffet are you talking about? It would be the Dubai kind of Meridian buffet, I think, where you've got everything. Absolutely everything. You've got one of them? Yeah. Nice. Okay, that sounds nice. What activities do you do? I can't miss hotel breakfast knowing like we go, if we go away for like two days on our own, Pete's like, oh, let's have a lazy one stay in bed. I'm like, no. We're getting off. at stupid times between five and eight. I mean, usually, there's nothing worse. 5am. 5am and eight. It's usually something like that. Bear in mind I'm always in like a travel lodge, but like it's, it's like always you're like, oh, Gavin, heavy night out.

39:59There's nothing worse than like a 10am finish. Yeah. Of a breakfast. Yeah. I love a 10am. It should be like an 11. It should be 11 minimum. All day breakfast. Even though half 10 is too It's too early isn't it to finish. Well does the McDonald's finish at half 10 now? No it's 11 isn't it? Is it? That's a great question. One of the best decisions of all time. It used to be half 10 though. It's around half 10 or 11. I don't know. Maybe it is. I think it is. I think you're right. I think it's 11. Okay so you guys have enjoyed the breakfast on the beach buffet? Yeah no we're going to the proper buffet.

40:31We have to go down it can't even be in the room. Okay. Are you getting glammed up for it? No. Sunglasses. Sunnys and just hat. We're not glammed up for that. just to brush the teeth chubby and out the door. Straight out the door. Isn't it? Yeah. And then we'll get ready after. And then we'd lie by the pool straight after that. Activities, that's just lie by the pool, unfortunately. Okay. Pete, this sounds more like your day. There's nothing one animal in this. One nice new outfit or anything. I'm letting breakfast go down first. We're going to chill by the pool. No, but we have to get showered and ready first.

41:09We've got showered and ready. Okay. Yeah. All right. She's unplanned your day. You can't plan your day. Okay, go on. Yeah, so we'll go. We'll ride horses along the beach, which is actually what we did. We've done this. Oh, yeah? You've had loads of perfect days. I have. I have. I have. We rode horses on the beach once. That was amazing, wasn't it? Yeah. Where was this? In Cabo? Yeah, in Mexico. We did that. That was fantastic. Stunning. Who's there? It's just me for now. And then I think you'll get bored of me. So I'll bring Lucinda and people like that after. Kaz, maybe Alfie, everyone. And then we'll go for dinner with all of them.

41:49You've missed lunch. Are we skipping lunch? You can do lunch, all right. So you've done your activities. You've swam. You've rode horses. You've swam with riding horses on the beach. Okay, yeah. But is that a good idea with my tan? What? Am I going to be swimming? Bear in mind I've had a fresh spray tan. You're not going to swim. I haven't seen you in a pool or sea for about eight years. I know. I wish I was a water babe, but I'm absolutely not. Are you not? She likes doing things on the water. I'm more of a spectator. Okay. You don't mind a boat? You've got sea legs. Yeah, I like a boat. Okay, fair enough.

42:24Yeah, that's a good day. We could do horse riding in a boat. And that boat somehow gets us to form a tear or something like that. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And we'll have a paella, like a little, like... I don't like rice though. Well, like, you know what I mean? like that kind of environment where it's like rosé, really pale rosé on the sand. Ali Ali. And a few chores and stuff like that. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. We've done our horse ride. We've sunbatheed a little bit. We've had a breakfast buffet. We've done a kind of form and tear up IB3 lunch. And then we're just going to head back sunset vibes. Nice and chilled music.

43:05Nice and calm. riding away the way the sea is like a pond. Can I just say that when have we ever come home calm from an Ibiza lunch? It's more like Wolf of Wall Street where the boats like capsize. Full carnage, yeah. But I just don't want you to have a hangover at the end of it. Oh, no, I won't. So, okay, you can do that but we don't get a hangover as well. It's a dream day. Yeah, you can have that. It's rosé in the sun all day with no hangover. Perfect. Then we get off the boat and miraculously you're dressed for dinner. like you know you've had your shower she hates getting ready so the minute she steps off the boat she's done you just click like that like that and she's done as if she's been getting ready for years and then she looks a million dollars and we stroll into a kind of Italian Portofino I was in Italy I got off the boat to Italy she's in Italy She's Portofino, kind of Sardinia, potentially Rome, something like that maybe.

44:11But I think it needs to be still porty because we've just come into the port. Lots of big yachts around. And we shimmy into this incredible restaurant, dimly lit, very romantic. Oh, yeah. Yeah, and we kind of stroll in there. The waiters have got, like, white dinner jackets on. Oh, yeah. I like that. Oh, yeah. You know the ones. Dimly Lit Restaurant. White dinner, Jassie. Dimly Lit. It's a fucking great day, my man. It's a great day. If this doesn't get turned out, I'd turn it. This is... It's a great day, no? So then we're... Right, okay, it's Dimly Lit. You've forgotten gifts? It's an Italian.

44:49This is right at the end of the evening. Oh, no.

44:56Yes, as I say, like, really beautiful kind of Italian food in a courtyard setting. Ugh. as I say maybe the last you know he blows some dust off the red the bottle of red that we have and you know it's top level taste it oh you know that's perfection we might have a star so you do a few bits and pieces and then we end with a what's the one that they make is it the souffle souffle that we pre-ordered so we pre-ordered that before comes out piping hot you slice into it it just pours out you eat the goo I eat the small spongy pot and sponge. That's cute. That's so cute.

45:39And then I'll just give you, you know, a gift of some sort, you know, something sparkly. From Claire's? Yeah. Then we get an Uber, throw up, don't touch each other. Come near each other till the morning. So you go straight from there to bed. Good day. 10 out of 10. Wow. I feel like these are a round of applause. Funny because it's true. Great day that though. Perfect day. That really took us away somewhere nice that. That was lovely. I was thinking we should have a little bit of us time. Yeah. I'd love to do that. All of those things are incorporated in things that we've actually done. Yeah. Okay.

46:23We've loved. And I think putting that together when you've been together 20 years is quite easy really. Because you just think where was she happiest and where did she tell me she loved? well you're missing one key point out of this whole story why is it you were there the whole time

46:41don't cry are you gonna cry you gotta give this a rating out of 10 10 11 really yeah oh the boys done good the boys don't good that's really cute that's very good your ideas up for next week i just want it i just want to go now yeah i really want to i'm so excited about it it's like that time when we were sitting in outside with a bottle of wine, planning how we'd spend the Euro millions when it was like a 200 million roll over. Right? Yeah. Yeah. And we were just saying, what would we do? I think plenty of people have done that. And we were so excited like it was actually happening. That's actually a great episode idea actually.

47:18And then I was like, and do you remember when I said, so I'd have to give our John this and then we called our John and he was like, well, I wouldn't give you anything. Yeah. So we Is that what he said? Yeah. So we had to take it all away from him. He's been banished. It wouldn't give you anything? No. Wow. He was like, no. Yeah, he was like, no, I wouldn't. I was like, I've just bought you a£10 million house, John. A yacht. No, that was... The reason we had that argument was because we said, we're buying your ticket. And he said, yeah, but you still have to give it all to me. Oh, yeah, that was it.

47:49He said, but yeah, but you still have to give that all to me. I said, so what? Hold on. So if I'm buying a ticket, kind of almost the numbers are in my position. Yeah. You still wouldn't give me any of it. And I was like, obviously not that I wanted to, but I just, it pissed me off. Yeah, it pissed me off. I'm putting this belt on. It might, if you think about it, the shop, if we argued it. Yeah. Will you be on CCTV buying it? Well, the shop would say it's me who's entitled to it. Oh, yeah. They would, wouldn't they? Yeah, they would, yeah. Yeah, because you'd be on CCTV buying the ticket. Well, so I bought my own money.

48:24Yeah, and picked the numbers. And one of them wasn't even his fucking birthday. So at least he can say is, yeah, I'll give you a few quits. Because I said I'm willing to give you all of it. But you definitely gave me a little Brucey shirt. To be honest, though, most of our pleasure was out of giving it to other people and buying them things and just surprising them with like... Yeah, a lot of it was, yeah. A lot of it was. Yeah. That's cute. It's entirely fictional. I love that. It just shows you the money's the root of all evil, isn't it? Yeah, it's true. We argued about it and it didn't even happen.

49:01A real fight about a hypothetical 200 million.

49:07Well, that was cool, guys. You want to move into some agony abs? Yeah, I enjoyed that. I enjoyed that as well. I really want to do that dream, doesn't it? Yeah, I'll do that for you. Obviously, it's a bit difficult with travel. I think but yeah I think we could do parts of that it's all I'm desperate to go back to Italy I want to go to our IB3 performance era vibes and I'd love to go back to Carville Hawaii those three kind of trips we could all do them separately but do those things in them once we've won that 200 mil yeah nice all right dear Pete and Abby I'm a big fan of the pod been listening since day one I love the humour and enjoy hearing Pete landing himself in the smelly stuff just the same as I do with my wife I was after some advice please Abby if I may I remember you in the early episodes you covered endometriosis your journey and you had a doctor on my daughter Millie aged 22 really suffers with stomach pains during period literally spends days doubled up in pain she also displays other symptoms like poor bowel movement, tiredness etc etc she's been to the doctor so many times and just gets fobbed off told to take ibuprofen, bascupine and it'll go away and of course it doesn't she's currently 15 months into traveling australia and southeast asia which is amazing for her but she spends three to four days a month unable to do anything due to the pain she's in what would you advise please as someone who has been through this journey thank you so much love andrew i think she should get in contact with dr braithwaite we can send the details because you know it's such a it's a story i heard over and over again it's like years and years for a diagnosis um a good friend of mine i think she was nine years before she got a diagnosis and at that point like the damage is already done you know it can affect your fertility it can cause like internal scarring obviously i'm not a doctor this is just you know bits and bobs that i know but i think she should go and see him and get some advice and get a proper diagnosis because we helped he's helped so many of our listeners hundreds and hundreds of our listeners.

51:10Quite a lot of them got in touch when Abby I had a message the other day of a girl who'd had endometriosis went to see Dr Braceway was struggling with fertility and now since seeing him she's got a baby. You're joking. Yeah. This guy sounds like an actual legend. Yeah he is an absolute legend. He'd come on the pilot and he said he would open up his doors for like We should get him back on for endometriosis month when is it? Maybe just to chat about what you know what's happened in that period as well because he's helped so many. Because we do get a lot of these messages and it is about the diagnosis, what they can do.

51:43Is there anything you can say to your normal GP instead of getting fobbed off with ibuprofen or paracetamol? Is it a line you can say, can you test me for X, Y, Z? Great idea. Awareness month is this month, it's March, yeah. So. Okay. There you go. Trying to get a word in from him. Yeah, great stuff. That's really good advice. Okay, dear Pete and Abby, I'd love to ask a question. I dated a chap a while ago. It was a ride and not a great one. he came back into my life after a long handwritten letter back in autumn last year and i've slowly fallen in love with him again we've had the odd tiff and sometimes trigger each other but i personally believe it's workable and perhaps the previous tricky time needs a good old talking through i am still to this day unsure why he abruptly left me after a few beers the other night and later stated he couldn't handle the conflict we're not perfect and i'd like the opportunity to speak to him with a professional i understand where the communication went wrong what i do know is i love him i believe in us but i also need him to meet me there too does this make sense it makes absolute sense i think gaz i would love to get a relationship expert on okay because i know we're pretending to be relationship experts because we've been together for a good job 20 years more but it's a massive um issue that a lot of couples have it's communication lack of and it can be like deeper rooted like in a relationship you could have an avoidant and I can't remember what the other one is why are you saying avoidant?

53:17don't you are some people don't know how to deal with conflict where are you getting all this info from? Instagram you keep hitting me with little little facts like avoidant oh shut up no it's It's a real thing. It's a real thing. Couples do not know how to communicate, how they feel. Some people go, oh my God, conflict, I'm going to run away. Where as the other person think, oh my God, I'm being abandoned. And I can't express how I feel because he's going to walk out the door and leave me. And that's not healthy. You know, even if he walks out the door for 10 minutes, it doesn't give us a safe space to be able to talk about your feelings or if you have a problem.

54:03There is a thing with definitely, I think women in general, just want to talk about their feelings more than men want to talk about their feelings. You know, men are seen, I think back in the day, especially it's very much like, you don't want to show weakness, showing feelings shows weakness. You know what I mean? It's deep rooted. But in some relationships that everyone's happy when it's happy and when it's not, they don't know what to do. So I think if we could get a relationship like a counselor, a guru on, who could help our listeners through this with that. And, you know, she can test it on us.

54:35What would you do in X, Y, Z scenarios? And she can help us with some agony apps because I think communication is key, but some people don't know how to do it. Like, because most men are probably saying, oh, I don't want to sit here and get nagged at for half an hour. Yeah, because if I'm coming, say if you've had a long day at work or whatever and your missus is called, you said, we really need to talk this evening. Oh, fuck. It would be. I would think, oh God. You dread it all day. Yeah, you would. Yeah. That's cool. Yeah, good idea. Would you be excited about that all day? I'd be worried if you said let's talk because that's a bit scary.

55:11Yeah. But I think it's all how it's communicated. It needs to be like, I've got some things on my mind. It's not making me feel great. I think that, you know, that should be more open. But you do have to meet halfway because one person isn't 100 % right in most scenarios. you do i don't like that term like a relationship is compromise yeah i don't like that but you do have to kind of you can't just be selfish in a relationship you have to think of how would i feel if that happened to me or the the greed you dealt with that expertly yeah well that's why it's called agony abs and not agony crouches um okay well done babe yeah i think we had some We had some nice moments.

55:59Yeah, I'm just daydreaming about that perfect date. Yeah, I'm going to take one. Can't wait for you to go to yours. Plate shops. I'm going to, no, it was nice. It was some nice moments, and I enjoyed it. Oh, yeah? Yeah, keep your agony abs and your weekly lines. Come on, folks, and we'll see you next week. See you.

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