Ducks, Koi Carp and A Very Angry 16-Year-Old!

0:01Acast powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. A photographer in Texas earns an extra$47 ,000 a year shooting Star Wars cosplay portraits. A teacher in Maryland turns her woodworking hobby into a five-figure side income without leaving the classroom. And a couple in Pennsylvania will rent you backyard chickens for the season so you can try the egg-laying life without commitment. My name is Chris Guillebeau. I'm the host of Side Hustle School. I share these kinds of stories every single day, in detail, with full transparency about the numbers. The point isn't just to inspire you, it's to show you what's possible.

0:40Proof that ordinary people are quietly building extra income in surprising ways, including a few ideas you can borrow. Less than 10 minutes a day, every day. Subscribe or follow Side Hustle School wherever you get your podcasts, or find us directly at SideHustleSchool.com. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com With a spoon. Now with a knife. Please, with a spoon. Now with a knife, you fucking gobshack. Like Willie. Like Willie. To you. And when Rip says in the morning, quick ride before you go, I'll saddle up. You can speak it every day. You can sex me every day.

1:26This is Private Property! Hello and welcome to The Third Coach with me, I'm a Glancy. Me, Peter Crouch. And me, Gaz. Gaz, boy. How are we, guys? We're good. Guys, you need to excuse our set-up today. We're currently in the middle of moving house, moving countries. Pete's off to the US. Yeah. There's a lot going on, basically, at the moment. So she's got to bear with us for a while. I'm going to America. coach so the therapy crouch is i mean god knows what we're gonna do but we'll sort something out well we know what we're doing you guys are gonna be long distance yeah i feel like it's quite relatable for a lot of couples out there to be fair so we can see how you guys are they don't work well that's not a great start in the relationship is it well no because i can't wake a fucking computer for a start so that's not going to be good is it and you're gonna have to pick up the old sex thing again straight in we could just do like um live yeah live things yeah live that would be careful with the laptop it's like it's complicated where they try and where he puts alec bald and puts his like penis on the screen that's your favorite film is there you love that film so lovely I will not be showing you my penis.

2:49Don't worry about that. I'm looking forward to it. I think half the ep will be just you learning how to use a laptop and that'll be eventful for people. I think it'll be good. I might know a few people who can help me. Oh yeah? You techies. You nerds. Got three beyond the camera. They're going to be in America. It's true. My daughters will be able to help. Oh yeah, they're a whiz. How have you guys been? You been alright since Portugal? It's been full on, mate, to be honest, because we were in Portugal, we're now back, we moved house. A hell of a lot of stuff to do, isn't there, really? There's a lot to do.

3:24But, you know, it's not like, I don't want you feeling sorry for us, because, you know, we've moved into our dream home. I don't think anyone does. No, but we've moved into our dream home, but it's just logistically, there's lots of plates to spin. Oh, yeah, yeah. So it's just been a bit... People say moving house is stressful, right? moving countries as well yeah schools with the world cup on the horizon yeah uh it's been yeah jack's birthday lib's birthday it all came at once really so it has been all fun and you know it's just like we have to put the kids first and do what's best with the kids you know i can't you know they need to be in school and pete needs to work so it's just a lot of change and I don't like being away from my husband.

4:09He's desperate to go. I'm not desperate to go. It's a World Cup. It's exciting. The World Cup's exciting. I mean, I don't know what to equate it for you, you know, but it's very exciting. It would be like, I think the equivalent to me would be like when, like a Net-A-Porter sale. Yeah, like it's down to like... Like the sales, January sales. Literally 95 % off. i've never had 95 percent 40 40 like yeah i mean that's is that your world cup it is the jan sales no yeah okay like paint colors and stuff like that house decor house decor we'll get into a bit of that later on when we talk about the new gaff i do like pens pens pens Oh, penalties?

4:59Yeah. Oh, right. I thought you meant like the biros. Biros. It's a second day. Yeah, no, they're exciting. I think a lot of people who don't like football get involved with the World Cup. It's, you know, people who don't normally watch it. You get swept up with it all, don't you? It's like Wimbledon, all the big stuff. You just, everyone thinks they're a tennis player. You know, the Masters, everyone thinks they're a golfer. I absolutely love Wimbledon. We're going to miss that. It's another thing you've ruined. Oh, is that on over at the World Cup? The World Cup, yeah. Oh, no. Oh, gutted. Yeah, that is always good fun.

5:30We can always watch it. Are you going to watch any World Cup? Have you made any plans to? Yeah, what channel would it be on? BBC. Okay, yeah. I don't think we've got that, have we? Yeah. I'm pretty sure everyone has that. No, in Portugal. In Portugal. Oh, right, in Portugal. Of course you do. Do we? Yes. So? No, I won't be watching. You won't be watching? All right. Well, listen, we've got... I'm joking, I will. I actually know Abby's Weekly Wine and it's not to do with me. Ooh. Do you want to get into the wine? I had a terrible day yesterday. What happened? So I was just ferrying the kids around, which was fine.

6:09And I had a little Jack and me day. Sorry, two days ago. Just me and Jack. So we went for a Chinese, we went to the cinema, and there was nowhere to park. So I parked in an unauthorised place, which maybe I shouldn't have done. but obviously not it was it was it was opposite your friend's shop right it was opposite my friend's shop and it's um a car park for the everyman cinema staff okay staff and the girl said oh you'll get a ticket there and i was like it doesn't matter i'll just get one but you know it's just convenient just take the hit yeah so when i came back they'd barricaded me in so they'd all moved their cars the car park was empty and they'd parked all around my car so there might be a bit of like mixed feelings on this.

6:57I shouldn't have been there. Well, no, it's obvious you'd know full well you shouldn't have been there. No, we shouldn't have been there. But why, if I worked in the Every Month cinema and the car park was empty and a stranger parked in the car park, I would not give a fuck. No, of course. I would not care. I wouldn't be scrolling through CCTV, go out, tell the whole staff to barricade my car in. So it was the staff. Yeah, all the staff. All the staff. Oh my God. Barricading me in. I do. And I, what? No, no, I think obviously you're wrong to park there but I think what, why would you be asked?

7:35So when I came back it was this one particular guy and he just parked. So the whole car park was empty and then he just parked his car right behind mine as well as all the others and he was getting out. So they'd made this conscious decision to all go out, all move the cars, barricade me in. So I was like, can I move? He was like, no, you're going to have to get an Uber home. What? And he was about 16. And I was like, Harry? And he was like, no. He said, we're all too busy. You're not allowed to park in here. I said, well, you're also not allowed to barricade me in. He said, well, this is the chef's car.

8:09He's too busy. He's not moving it. This girl, she's serving behind the counter. She's not moving her car. So I just burst into tears. She calls me crying. I'm like, what is actually going on? I have never been spoken to in my life. but like how this teenage boy spoke to me jesus and then when i went into the everyman and bearing in mind i've got my little six-year-old son with me he's screaming at me and then this girl is going oh my god you not understand this 16 year old kid and i'm like but i just had nothing like i just was like i just could not stop crying because i was and he was going to me and then pete got on the phone and he was like people say listen mate why are you being an asshole he said don't you call me mate and then call me an arsehole in the same sentence who do you think you are so i'm like hysterical in the cinema everyone's looking at me oh so then i walked absolutely yeah of course they were all congregating they're all these teenagers and then the chef was in there and i was like please could you just move your car i just need to get home i was late for my other children and the chef was like of course he was i was wondering why they'd asked us all to move the cars and it was to barricade me in.

9:18I just couldn't believe one. Yes I shouldn't have been there. But why do they care? What's he going to be like? I get it. Okay that might be annoying for you. Notify a traffic warden or something or get them clamps or something like that. I totally understand that right but doing that and having the actual like actually going through with that. It's unbelievable. He was not right that boy how he spoke to me and how he really really enjoyed like this power and making me feel so scared and crying he was like frothing at the kitchen honestly i reckon he would have i reckon he would have seen you and gone right we're gonna show her today and sounds like he's really gone like who does she think she is yeah it'll be one of those Sounds a bit like Lord of the Flight.

10:13In front of my son as well, like my baby son. Yeah, that is mental. That's traumatic for him. He's going to grow up to be a traffic warden. Good luck to him. Exactly right. You know, I've got joy lately with people like that. You had that curmudgeon in Portugal who didn't want to speak to you. It was like email us about a birthday party. Do you remember that? That's another issue. That's another thing I did. You know, obviously we came back to the UK and I forgot to cancel Jack's birthday. Oh, really? So they all turned up there in Portugal. No. No. What? I spent the whole day crying, like, because I'd just messed up so much.

10:44Oh, bless you. I'm just getting everything wrong. Like, I was like, oh. Yeah, she was, I could see that she was really upset and that was. I wanted you to kick us in, didn't we? Well, I was here, wasn't I, with the kids on my own. I was in your car, you had no car. Yeah, that's a good point, yeah. But, you know, I was absolutely fuming. I wanted you to come in like Vin Diesel and. Vin Diesel. Vin Diesel. Vin Diesel. Vin Diesel him. I will when I see him. Next time you see him. You know which one it is. It is a strange one, isn't it? Yeah, that reaction is over the top. And as far as wines go, that is a very valid wine to have today.

11:21Like, who gets a thrill out of making girls cry? I don't know. I don't know. That is mad. Yeah. I'm old enough to be your mother. Also, why is he enforcing the law? I know, like, you can't do that. I let the law enforce. Do you know what I mean? Like, well, I don't get it. I just genuinely, if I was working in a cinema, I'll go, someone's part of that's illegal. Do you want popcorn? What's that? It's really not illegal. It's really, I would not. Sweet salt is mixed. Random question, sorry, can I ask, what did you see? What did you go to see? I saw a fabulous film and it really cheered, well. Was it good?

11:54Yeah, it was The Sheep Detectives. I've heard that's good. It was so good. Did it make you cry as well? Oh, yeah. It's a tearjerker, yeah. And any show where Hugh Jackman dies, I'm crying. Hugh Jackman shouldn't be dying. He shouldn't. That is a tearjerker. believe how muscly Hugh Jackman is yeah well he's Wolverine he's Wolverine unit does he get his kit off in the film no but he's like he's like a farmer and he's got like this tight top on his arms like bloody that one yeah but you can't be Wolverine without a pair of guns can you I didn't realize he didn't have to be in The Greatest Showman yeah but you know he's a circus he was like a Cirque du Soleil wasn't he yeah don't need them for that but it was it was lovely anything with talking animals yeah oh is it a talk is it a real film like babe like babe oh fantastic okay can't go wrong with that brilliant that's so amazing that sounds great that's a good endorsement I fancy that you got any wise Pete um not really um uh I mean yeah I mean there has been loads recently but um what

13:02I've got loads if you want wise I can give you one. I'll give you a straight one. Now send Pete the butchers. Oh, God. He asked me if I had a wine. My wine wasn't about you, but I'll make one about you now. I sent him to the... You've had one. You only get one. I sent him to the butchers to get our food. Listen, please. We only get one wine. You know, we came back with real life fish for the pond instead of any food. Oh, right. Did he have a brief? How does that feel? Now you know what it's like, eh? What do you mean? What do you just nip out and bring animals home? We have actually, we've got ducks.

13:35Yeah. No, but, sorry, we're actually glossing over. Pete going, I sent Pete to the, not I sent Pete, Pete was like, I'm going, we're doing a barbecue. Pete's like, I'll go and get the food. I was getting all the house ready, blah, blah, blah. He came home with four fish for the pond and no food. We've got a pond here now. Right, I saw, yeah. It's really nice. And it's got a few quick half in it. But the previous owner took loads. so I thought you wouldn't believe it I was talking to the kids I said we must get some more carp for that thing walk past when have you ever seen this fishery or whatever specialising in koi carp on the road where was that local it was meant to be shush yeah it's 10 minutes and I went oh my god so we screeched in went in there screeched in three wheeled in screeched in back doubled straight in oh my god the carp selection was phenomenal I actually didn't mind because it was an animal.

14:34Yeah. Brilliant. A live one. We had a whole, we released them. We had a whole releasing of the carp. And Pete feeds them every day. There's no babies. I feel like Tony Soprano, you know, in the swimming pool. No, but he has ducks, no carp. Yeah, but it's that kind of vibe. You've got ducks anyway. I have, we have got ducks. Is this part of your ritual now, your daily routine? You'll just feed the... Yeah, I've got wellies. You see them over there. I just stroll around in wellies now. and I just feed carp and tend to my ducks. I love it for you guys. Yeah, so Sam's just gone to get the ducks. Our little duckies.

15:11And we'll show you them. I can't wait. I can't wait. They are. And we keep them inside, right, in like an incubator or whatever, like a heated thing. What's that called? When they were an egg, they were in the incubator, then they hatched. So you buy an egg? You get the eggs. They stay in the incubator until they hatch. then they go in the cage with the heat lamp and like fresh water we put them in the bath every day so they submerge in water and they play and they're shit instant they are messy are they are they pretty messy very so they're born here they were born here born here one was born on jack's birthday really oh my god oh my god he's got big eyes god for the visual I haven't seen him for a day and he's got so much bigger.

16:01Yeah. Yeah, I saw you put a story out and they look tiny. And he looks double the size. Yeah, for the audio listener, there is a duck involved in the podcast now. Which one's this?

16:14That's Bob. That's Bob? Yeah. They all got names? Yeah, Bob. Oh yeah, he's got a little white bum, see? Pip. There's Jack Quack. Which is... Gaffadil. Daffodil. Daisy, wasn't it? Yeah, they're nice actually. I actually quite like them. Beautiful. This one's got blue eyes. It's gorgeous. They're Peking ducks. Peking ducks? Like the Peking ducks? Well, literally like the pancake vibes. The hoisin. One was called pancake at one stage. Really? That's so cute. They are lovely. Do you want to hold before he goes back in? No. We're all good. He's good. He's good a lot. Oh. I see the state of you. Do you know what the cutest thing ever is a duck's tongue?

17:05A duckling's tongue? What? A duck's tongue? When they yawn and their little tongue, it's just so cute. Oh, my God. He seems pretty chilled there, doesn't he? Look at his little waist bump. He just raised up. Do you want to go back? So that's our vibe at the moment. Carp and duck. Carp and ducks. Little chick. Shall we send it home? Oh. Look at that. Oh. They just love you. Look at that. Are you all right? Be careful. Yeah, with regards to my wine, I'm going to go along with your wine because that was so annoying. Yeah. And the way he treated you was wrong. So wrong to treat someone like that. Especially when they were trying to have a nice day with his son.

17:54And yeah, you were wrong. You were totally wrong. Yeah. But the pettiness of parking behind it is just... I think your wine would have been that we brought the ducks home, but you've fallen in love with them. The man said to me, you can keep them because they're supposed to go back after five weeks. You kind of rear them. Oh, really? Three days. No, three days. Yeah, keep them back. Okay, let's get into some audience wines. I'm bored of your whining. Abby Pete Gan. A Portsmouth-based wine. Who better to ask? I attended a bottomless brunch in Portsmouth I went to Portsmouth this week, looking for radiators You did actually?

18:30Did you? Yeah, radiators for you Gunwolf keys? Nice gorgeous cast iron Radiators for you Is that a joke? It's actually called that? Yeah What? Yeah Oh my god Yeah, it was Was it really? Was it good? Yeah, the like real authentic cast iron Like original, like will suit this house Because it's a period house You had to go all the way there? to look at some radiators. Well, it's not just some radiators. These are the radiators for you. There they are. Top level radiators. They're phenomenal. But I had to go there. Yeah. You know, it's not a lighthearted decision. A radiator. What were you doing? Just sort of touching the radiators?

19:14Just giving them a little knock? Knock? I don't know what you do. I don't know what you get more apart from looking at a radiator, what more you can do in person. Yeah, because some of them are like... like ceramic some of them are cast iron polished unpolished painted oh my god with texture with a print like a pattern like a floral pattern on it can be black white every every any color you want to then you have to pick the valves if you want the shields on them oh my god yeah it's not i think you're blessed that she can do this for you because i wouldn't have one out she's passionate there's a real passion she wasn't going there oh i've got to look at radio and she was like oh Oh, I'm looking at radiators today.

19:54She's got the horn. The radiator horn. Things are going to get hot down there. The radiator's for you. Absolutely. Absolutely. He's down in Portsmouth. He says, unfortunately, due to using the same oil to fry prawns as their white bait, I had an allergic reaction at this brunch. This bank holiday weekend, I was invited to attend a friend's birthday, bottomless brunch there again. Due to the experience I had last time, I asked if I could just attend and buy a few drinks from the bar as I can't eat half the items of food because they're either shellfish or fried with shellfish. That sounds a bit shellfish, doesn't it?

20:30Yay! There it is. It's lovely. I offered to pay the full price at the bar. I could still attend the event as I didn't want to pay the 50 quid to attend an event at which I could fully participate. The reply I received from the management was obnoxious. The reply I received from management was obnoxious and accusatory. Accusatory. Accusatory. That is not a word, is it? Is that even a word? I think so. Accusatory. I don't think it is. I mean, I have never said accusatory. I've never seen it written down, actually. Now I'm double guessing. Can someone Google accusatory? I'm backing him. It's accusational, isn't it?

21:06Accusational. That's a different way of saying it. Yeah, hang on. I haven't used that word in my life. The next word is very much of my vocabulary. He says they were being obnoxious, accusatory, And in brackets he said, wankers. We all know where we stand. They told me this was my responsibility and if I wished to attend, I'd have to pay£50 just to order gluten-free food. No alternative food was offered and no compromise. Following a few more emails between me and these tossers, they eventually said it's probably best if you don't attend. My friend is fully understanding of this and it's no problem.

21:41I'd like to know if I'm the arsehole or the restaurant in question, just absolute mouth breathers. Thanks. Anonymous crustacean allergist. Oh, my gosh. I think it can go both ways. That one. Yeah. Because if that restaurant had everyone going out and saying, I want to come, but I'm not going to eat, and I want to pay half the price. You know, if everyone had that theory, they could go and eat and get the food for free. Yeah. Which probably has been done. I think the restaurant should have been more forthcoming and saying i need you to pay the 50 quid but i need i can guarantee that i will provide something that's safe for you to eat all sounds a bit fishy to me you too oh my god oh that's phenomenal yeah i don't know how you police uh bottomless brunch you must have gone to a fair few in your in your time not to stereotype you but like i feel like it's quite it's quite like female i mean like it's a stereotype i actually haven't been to a bottomless brunch never like a fish eating never never so i've been to a few it's always for girls birthdays that's why i was looking at you it's usually it's a really for me it's a female orientated activity activity we've been to one in dubai they did they do like a brunch but i've never been to a bottomless brunch It does feel a bit twatty.

23:07I actually hate those words. Bottomless of brunch. Yeah. I feel like it is a bit twatty. I get it. It's a fun day out. I do get it. Lots of people do it. I think it's a Dubai thing to do. I'll be honest. I think it'd be very, listen, there's no denying I would enjoy one. I like drinking and I like dancing and I like eating. Yeah. Oh, you'll love it. And I like it during the day. So I reckon I think if you say, if you said to me, Pete, do you want to do this bottomless brunch i'd think less of you

23:42is that okay to feel like that yeah yeah how would you feel if i said babe i've booked us a bottomless brunch i'd be like oh it's icky it's like one of them like eat all you can vibes isn't it yeah yeah yeah remember those what's these all you can eat buffet yeah all you can eat buffet yeah plus all you can drink although you would love one of those these do like a chinese all you can eat remember those bangers you just did in the harvester as well oh you can't have all you eat in a bloody harvest they give you one slice of meat they give you that one bowl don't you get the salad bowl now refillable unbelievable really yeah that refillable salad bowl i used to rinse that that was one of my cravings when i was pregnant a harvester yeah roast not like a nice roast a harvester there's one in northfields part royal way the one i used to go to that's next to the first ever nando's in great britain i really yeah healing there's a harvester there by um the station is it west acton or north acton station yeah the one in richmond was nice carvery sorry it's a carvery i wanted to go to oh right right right i wanted a carvery like it has to be a toby carver yeah like i just didn't want like a posh I just wanted a carberry.

24:55Paper thin beef. No paper than turkey. I like that. Yeah, I know that's what I mean. It's not bad. In the little metal tin. Yeah, it's not bad. Unbelievable. I would love to take you guys to a harvester and a Toby in one day. I really, really fancy a harvester and a Toby carberry now. We could go for one tonight. I'll treat you. The last supper. Yeah. How are you feeling about it all? The World Cup? Sad. Yeah. It's just because you love me so much, isn't it? I know. Yeah. I am great. I'll just be on my own. I love you, by the way. Just be on my own. You're not going to be on your own. You'll be all right.

25:34You'll be fine. You won't. You'll be long distance. No. Okay, hi, Crouchy Avon Gaz. Long time listener here. Never written in before, but I heard you discussing Biggest Girlics, and I felt obligated to give you two pence. We'll see if you guys agree. You said to me the other day, which would be an egg. Oh, what was it? Can you remember? What a female, Alec? Yeah, you said it to me the other day. You said if you actually did that, that would be an ick. Can you remember? Did I write it on my neck? Possibly. The first thing I've got here is talking about the Dutton Ranch. And you said if you said that to me, that would be the best thing you've ever heard in your life.

26:07Riding a horse, not you. No, I know that. I know you wouldn't enjoy that.

26:16No, I would. I'd prefer to ride a horse. I know, I know you would. Like, first thing in the morning. I'd prefer to ride a horse. First thing in the morning, you believe that? No. That's a genuine comment. No, not in general. First thing in the morning. First thing in the morning. Okay. That would be a lovely... In the evening, you'd rather... I'm not saying anything like that. But what I'm saying is it would be a lovely thing to just say, should we go for a ride on a horse? First thing in the morning? Phenomenal. Yeah. It was the way Rip's gone like, you know, do you fancy a ride? Yeah. You know, all sad lap.

26:47Like, he'll go and sort it out. She'll just hop on a horse and go for a... Gallop. Gallop. you know across montana i mean that would be amazing that would be not yeah yeah but like that's like me saying babe quick nine before we go you know we just go exactly and you and you went to me i'll get the clubs it's so true yeah but like that's to say it's exact same you're passionate about that if you went to me babe quick line i'll caddy you'd be like no Oh, Caddy. It's the same as Nora. What's with the point scoring? It's not point scoring, aren't you? It is point scoring. What is it point scoring?

27:22That's just ridiculous. That's your favourite term at the moment, isn't it? Point scoring. That's what you keep saying to me? Point scoring? I've never once said the words point scoring. You have. I have. You said it to me yesterday. I haven't. You did? Stop point scoring. Point scoring about point scoring now. No, it's, um, that's romantic. No, I'm not denying it. It's not romantic about playing nine holes. yeah it might be enjoyable for you but it's not romantic that would be romantic for me if you went to me babe shut your mouth you had the clubs on your back and you went hop in big boy we're gonna do nine before breakfast i'd go whoa that's what you want i'll get your golf clubs then from the club and i'll just say it to you no i'm only joking i had i had a girl like the other day that i was thinking about but it's so niche i don't know if it's going to land but a woman who says maybe some more pete woman he says trouser snake instead of what's that happy trouser snake do you know what i mean they've got like a one-eyed python trouser they come up with weird terms for a penis for a penis but like almost like commanding it's very samantha sex in the city like his trouser snake that expia do you feel it me i don't have a number one other than anyone who said the words trousers really um the only time of ed didn't they call justin timberlake that yeah justin trousers nick is that what they said yeah i'm already icked yeah there you go i've never said trousers nick until now really no i don't it's not it's not been i don't know it's just are you so ott there's so many other words for it i don't know why we need that anyway i'm glad i got that off my chest it's weighing heavily on me you got that off your chest please no you gotta get these things guys it's a safe space it's a safe space to all just you gotta get things off your chest thanks mate you know don't if you're around him don't say that one-eyed python as well i've never heard anything no need and even the word willy i think cheapens it i don't know say willy if you're in the throes of passion and she goes you i love your willy i don't know you don't say willy to in like i think willy's just as acceptable it's quite a funny word willy no you'd say willy to a child to a child of course yeah put your willy away

29:50you don't say that well i think you just you know no i'd say to my children stop playing with your willy the boys are just gonna have it down they're making our children sound like they're getting their willies out and they're playing with them. They don't do that. The willies are in, but the hands, boys, little boys always put their hands in. That doesn't change. You always play the willy at some stage. That's disgusting. Why? Why? That is true, isn't it? You don't play. You're dying to do. Fucking hell. Not in front of you, anyway. That's fucking hell.

30:30Have you seen that thing on Instagram? Where like, women are like constantly talking about like, men, like just having no shame in like, scratch, having a little itch, or putting hands down their pants. But if a woman just did that, so obvious, just like a, oh yeah. Jesus Christ. Like, that wasn't on my youth. Like, men can't like handle it, how repulsive it is. but us as women have to deal with it but men are you know normally disgusting but that's not like the men there's a prank that women do to the husbands and they start doing that have you seen it yeah yeah it's like the double standards okay what's this fucking egg well the biggest thing is girls who walk around town carrying their yoga mats over their shoulders as if they're going on a three-day camping trip through the mountains i'm not against girls exercising or going to yoga class however um i feel like it's become trendy to carry a bulky yoga mat around town for everyone to see and bump into as many people as possible whilst i walk past them in the queue for coffee anyway keep up guys love the pod i've never seen that have you uh no yeah i don't know if i have i've seen a lot of yoga gear for like a flight they fly in and they go on the airplane and i I think there's a yoga look, isn't there?

31:52You are a different breed. You are a different breed of human. Do you know that? It's as terrible as... I don't... What was the... You're on top class. It's just like, I don't know, no idea. You've never seen it? Athleisure. Athleisure, exactly. Yeah, I mean, listen, there's a type of, you know, girl. And I'd include you in this as well. You're just like... It's like an... Is it called Aloe? anilola or something anilola anilola anilola what's it called do you know which one I mean you're mixing aloe and adenola together yeah yeah that's become the brand of choice yeah but adenola are the best leggings yeah I think they're cool they're the best they look good no one beats them I think they look great but you know there is it's become a a fashion accessory no but it's just easy because you can go put something on you still look great you feel good hugs you in all the right places then you can drop the kids off at school and then go to the gym or you could sack the gym off and meet your friend and have a coffee and pretend you've been in the gym yeah yeah so that's it's just that it's called athleisure athleisure is it athleisure yeah yeah yeah no it's not it's not it is that whole vibe going out in your athletic way yeah it's like I think you know carrying a yoga mat I think this person is saying that's the yoga mat I get the gym gear fine looks totally get that you're in fucking gym gear today the yoga yeah I know I know I don't know what I'm in today.

33:19I've kind of given up, haven't I? No, but I like it. I'm comfy, you know what I mean? The comfies is what you want. I'm just, I'm relaxed. I'm at home. Yeah, showing that I'm relaxed. You know, comfortable. That's why I'm not sold. Don't think you'll be wearing anything like that in LA. You'll be done up to fucking death. Why will I? I've got you some wardrobe for LA, by the way. The Million England shirts. Enjoy. You can have them. New ones. Yeah. Real England shirts? Yeah, yeah. Some of the retro ones. Retro, I loved them. But that's why I'm not sold on the Lululemons because he looks comfy to me.

33:51But if you're in your, I don't know, lycra, how comfy can you be? Are they comfy to wear? Are they comfy? So comfy. Are they? But you know, you haven't worn something like this.

34:05I'm comfy as well. You're comfy and chic though. I'm not. You're joking, aren't you? I've got no clothes. You are chic. You're very chic. Come on. Okay. Well, listen, you know, I disagree with you. Oh, God, you know, it just reminded me. We didn't order that robe for you. We need to do that because they'll sell out. Will they? So where is this robe from? It's from H &M Home. It's phenomenal. Unreal. It's padded. Oh, yeah. Like a bathrobe? Yeah, like a dressing gown. Uh-huh. Padded. It's almost like a throw from the end of the bed, but in a dressing gown shape. Oh, nice. But it's so soft and it fits Peter.

34:44And he loves it. It's literally like a duvet wrapped around you. It's like a goose feather. What was it called? Goose down feather? I don't know what that was. It's stunning, mate. Really stunning. Is it? Is it nice? You need to order them.

34:58Okay. Hi, funny people. I have a tricky situation. My husband and I are lucky enough to have a very small holiday home in Spain. However, my much McEvelyan? Machiavellian. I've not heard that either. Yeah. I'm not. I thought I was pretty good on words. You are good. Yeah, you are really good. That's a particularly... But Machiavellian... Yeah. Caroline Giddings didn't know what that means. I just, you know, Machiavellian's stepson wants to use it again this summer. Does that, is that like code for complete twat off? Machiavellian does not... It's like a rote. ...behaviour or political philosophy characterised by cunning, deceit and ruthless pursuit of power.

35:35It implies an extremely pragmatic approach where the ends justify the means, meaning traditional moral and ethical rules are cast aside whenever they get in the way of achieving a goal. The term gets his name from Niccolo Machiavelli, an Italian Renaissance diplomat and author. In his most famous 1513 treaties, The Prince, he wrote brutally honest guidebook for rulers on how to acquire and maintain power. Don't tell us you don't learn anything at the Third Precarch. This is where it's at. That's very interesting. for Renaissance type information. Don't talk to me about the Renaissance. Don't get me started.

36:18Why? What's up with the Renaissance? Beyonce. Talk about Anastasia again. Anastasia? If anyone talks to you about something you don't understand. That wasn't really, that was the Russian Revolution. Russian Revolution. If anyone talks to you about something you don't understand, like when we were talking about Brexit, I had no idea what was going on. You just say, don't get me started. Because then everyone goes, they think you've had an input. just say i can't go there again yeah i'm not doing it don't get me started as if you've been through the mill you understand it totally believable and you just dismiss situations that's so good so there renaissance don't get me started don't get me started i just love the word renaissance

36:59renee nice name i knew a lad called renee yeah that thing that girl's been stabbed doesn't she who? Rhys oh you know Rhys the actress oh where did that come from with that beforehand that is an absolute belter that isn't it Isaac what a cracker that is say it for our listeners okay with a spoon no with a knife Rhys with a spoon no with a knife you fucking gobshite oh I love that I love that Absolute cracker. Okay, sorry. So, okay, that was the word anyway. Oh, yeah. Okay, the Mechamelian stepson wants to use it again this summer. Take his girlfriend who doesn't really want anything to do with me due to A, me being the stepman, and B, she's so up my stepson's mother's arse, it's an ick.

37:56All of my personal stuff is in the holiday home, and they don't clean, change the bedding or towels, and there's no washing machine, and they can't be bothered to go to the laundromat. My stepson never asks to go to the house. He just assumes he can and take his girlfriend. Am I being mean? But it really does piss me off. Help. An honest Kent woman. P.S. I listen every day and you're a blast. I think it's a tough one. I think she obviously feels they have an issue with hair. So naturally she wouldn't want them to be in her private space. But she could be the bigger person and just go, you know, you're not going to be there.

38:39She could be the bigger person and just think I'll let them go. Yeah. My thought process around this is just going to the fact that how many people live in Kent have a place, a small place in Spain with no laundry stuff and a stepson who wants to go there. I'm just hoping that they don't listen to this podcast. Really. Yeah. Because I think they'll know who they are. Yeah, probably. Well, it does a bit. Probably narrows it down. But yeah, at least they'll know how you feel. Yeah. I think she's got a yield. I think as a lad, those are formative years to go away with your girlfriend at the time to a holiday home.

39:23It's always good fun, isn't it? Yeah, definitely. I think you're within your rights to say, can you, you know, clean up? No, because everything she says is going to... Or get the husband to say it. she'll think he'll think is a dig and but it must be hard i can see it both ways but it must be hard for the woman she's probably thinking why would i let him use my house he's a complete twat to me and so is the girlfriend why would i let him use the house when it suits him there is that argument and the other argument is oh it's a husband's son they're not going to be there what's what's the big deal he can go i can see it both ways and the the decision will come depending on what mood she's on that day if she's being more giving or or not or not but i i would be a bit like if they're so mean to me why would i let them it's like it's got all my stuff there i don't want them in my special house and they're not going to look after it that's the problem is i'm not looking after it i think you'd probably let them go if they if they were they cleaned it yeah yeah and kept it up i think you'd probably let them go that's probably it well i think you know definitely if you've got a few issues maybe raise it through the husband if the husband could help her out here and go look you can go but none of this leaving all the bedding dirty and everything you've got a promise that you've got to take all the bedding to the laundry get it cleaned leave it how you how it was when you arrived and no problem and if you don't you can't go again perfect cool sorry I zoned out there just for a little minute because of Millie's email I just feel like I have to read it out she said hi abs Pedro and Gaz I have a confession to make and Peter deserves an apology and a thank you back in 2005 when Peter signed for Liverpool I was a 7 year old girl who developed what only can be described as a deeply serious and completely irrational crush on him I need Peter to know that he was genuinely my reason for supporting Liverpool not Steven Gerrard not Champions League glory just Peter Crouch every weekend I'll be glued to match the day pretending I was interested in tactical formations when really I was just waiting for a glimpse of six or seven strike with a robot dance and a questionable haircut.

41:37Good thing is, 21 years later, I'm still a Liverpool fan, regularly a match goer, as well as a massive fan of both your fine selves. So, Peter, thank you. Without you, I might end up supporting someone entirely different. Oh, that's cute. I'd also like Abby to know that at one point in my life, she was living my dream and I'm still utterly in awe of you. Now, at 28... Living her dream? What does that mean? I think you were living her dream, I guess because you were with Pete. I suppose plenty of girls dreaming that though you don't realise how lucky you are that's why I wanted to read it out now at 28 you guys are to me the absolute goals and the kind of relationship I aspire to have with my other half lovely lots of love Millie a Liverpool supporter created entirely by Peter Crouch's accidental sex appeal wow bye Millie thanks for writing in but fuck off

42:31We get them a lot, actually. I'm very tempted to read them out. We're inundated with them. I never get anyone saying they like me. No, I'm joking. That's a self-expression. Everyone. Can I just say everyone? Do we? Can I just say every single person? Do we get like nice? We get loads. I fancy Abbey messages? Can I just say every single person on every email says, I love you, Abbey, you know, and Pete, you're all right. No, loving me is different to fancy me. You want someone to fancy you? I want someone to fancy me. Would that be suggesting that people write in How much they fancy you I'd like some yeah Okay well so would I You've had one So keep them coming Keep them coming everyone You've had one I haven't had any of these You have babe I have not There's plenty of people out there that fancy you They just They just respect me Well I'd like some Well I'm saying We don't want them We do We don't I don't know Why don't you want people You should be just happy with me Why did you want to read that one also Well, just because I need you to know that I am very much...

43:34Sighed. I'm very much sighed out there amongst the listener base. Right. Just wanted to let you know that. That's a beautiful spot to end on. It's a lovely spot to end on. I love you. I hope there's some nice 28-year-olds who fancy me. There will be. Plenty. Okay, good. We've opened the floodgates now. You know it's going to happen. Well, let them in. Yeah. Lovely. Okay, well, you know, let's wrap this up, babe. Great to see you. Great to see you. You forgot where he was. Great to see you. Thanks for coming by.

44:11Great to see you. Great to see you, Gus. See you, guys. Bye, everybody. Thank you. Bye.

44:29ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. I'm Laura Marie Shanehals. And I'm Terry O'Donnell. And together, we are the hosts of Sexy Unique Podcast. A podcast for geniuses about reality TV, pop culture, and every once in a while, a tangent about 9-11. I mean, it really affected all of us. On Sexy Unique Podcast, we insist on discussing the creme de la creme of reality television. From the current season of Vanderpump Rules to tried and true classics like early seasons of Real Housewives of New Jersey, to underrated gems like VH1's Rock of Love, and even Gallery Girls, we're talking about all of it.

45:13So what are you waiting for? Listen to Sexy Unique Podcast now on iTunes, Spotify, and wherever podcasts matter. a cast helps creators launch grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere acast.com