Father’s Day Chaos! Abbey Fosters Five Kittens, Gaz Burns His BALLS and a Listener’s Lingerie Confession!

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3:04What the hell? What would you say if I was, like, dancing and I had your underwear on? I'd just be like, what the hell are you doing? I love every animal. apart from capybaras. I hate them too. This might have just been the best email we've ever had. I couldn't believe it. I'll let you take it away. Really? That's a show, Gaz. We have to read this out, so you go for it. Hello, and welcome to the Therapy Crouch with me, Abbie Clancy. Me, Peter Crouch. And me, Gaz. Hello, Gaz. How are we? Gaz, look at him, look. He's in LA, living the lifestyle. Look over, I don't know if you can see this, all these black undies behind me on a washing machine.

3:45What the hell is that? Why? Have you mentioned that? What is that? It's just the most amount of Calvin Klein boxers you'll ever see hanging up on a line, I think. What kind of shot? Like, what kind of shot have you got in the background? What kind of ship are you running? What is it on? Like a washing line? It's got a washing line with boxer shorts behind him. That's his backdrop. What? Who did the washing? Yeah, we've just done the washing. Yeah, I've done the laundry today. I thought we might as well. You guys have got giant black muffs in your face. I can see. obscuring you we have yeah we're in I've come to see Ab for a few days in Portugal obviously I've been out in LA with you guys doing the Peter Crouch pod which has been a lot of fun to be fair but I had five days off and I wanted to make the shit pay didn't I keep saying five what I did it's three three days yeah but like a day's travel yeah that's true yeah three days travel yeah so that was nice surprise it's um is it nice being back together yeah it was nice it was nice seeing the kids and everything like yeah definitely um I came straight back into uh as soon as I landed I was at an animal sanctuary uh adopting adopting kittens so you know Animal Rescue Algarve who I've been volunteering at a little bit um they were out of foster carers five baby kittens were found in a dumpster and they needed a foster carer and they said is anyone can anyone help and I said I'll do it um so I thought I was going to be hand rearing bottle field bottle feeding like two day old kittens but in the end they found the mum which is obviously the best thing because obviously for the kittens to be with their mummy is the best chance of survival um so I've got a wild mum who you can't touch and five little tiny, tiny baby kittens, which are like the size of a hamster.

5:46So basically in our garage, there's a wild cat that everyone's afraid to go in there. No one's afraid of her. She's so timid. She is, yeah. She's kind of more scared than anything. Yeah, so I've just been dealing with kittens. That is unbelievable. But it is nice, to be honest. I think they would have... they said that they might not have survived if you hadn't done that. So it was well worth doing. She's a good mom. She is feeding them, but I've let her out the cage now, so she's just loose in the garage. It's quite unnerving when you go in there. Yeah. You see a set of eyes from behind the cushions.

6:26Oh my God. It's like a horror film. Yeah, yeah, it's not ideal. Do you like cats, Gaz? You know what? Not really, no. I'm more of a dog man. I grew up with dogs. What about you guys? You're a bit of both, aren't you? Yeah, I love every animal. Apart from capybaras, I hate them. What's your issue with capybaras? I don't know, I just think they're revolting. Is that the capybara on the back of my phone? Yeah, they're just horrible. They're guinea pig-esque, aren't they? That's the other thing that I don't like. And they're quite large, aren't they? Massive. Huge thing. They're the biggest rodent on earth, I think.

6:59Where did this come from, Abs? Imagine hating capybaras. That is mad, isn't it? What have I done to you? nothing I just don't like them they're scary are they scary okay fair enough so this fostering of cats then do you give them back eventually or do you keep them now what's the vibe yeah what is the deal with that babe we don't need to keep them doing well it's five cats it's going to be hard to give them up at the end but I think Aura will find them homes there's a home for them in our house is there really yeah definitely we have done that before had the passport and all that yeah but we have got mice in the new house that came back on the survey there were mice in the roof so it's actually it would actually be really beneficial to take them home and you know they could patrol honestly that's the worst excuse to just keep the cats there's mice I don't know I feel about five cats in the house I'd definitely take a couple of them and find amazing homes for the rest yeah would that be okay yeah I just think well like weekly wine wise I think that was kind of my wine incorporating that really just a constant need for like adopting or or getting animals well it's probably because I can't have another baby do you think well I can but you won't let me I won't I'm too old so I won't let you it's like four's enough it's definitely enough yeah and actually I actually don't want my four children at the moment yeah no after it's wearing thin now as well yeah since Pete's been away they think they could do what the hell they like oh no really so yeah it's been tough it's been so nice to have you home.

9:01I've got a weekly shine. Oh really? Yeah, it's good to have you back. I've missed you so much. Oh, that's nice. Where are you going? All right, we'll get into some audience ones, Gaz. I think so. I think first of all though, we should probably say happy Father's Day at time of recording. How's your day been, mate? I've had a lovely day, mate, yeah. I'll be honest with you, I didn't feel very well, so I didn't actually do anything. We've just had a lazy Father's Day. Pete was supposed to play golf this morning but he couldn't because he didn't feel very well all the kids have had the vomiting bug so oh god that was fun and then yeah like Liv made me an amazing card didn't she yeah they made me cards which was nice Johnny always he always draws two giraffes yeah with daddy and me well him every card he does for me he does a giraffe because I told him it was my favourite animal which is nice and I lifted a golf card it's so good isn't it it was a great card you're the best dad by par oh that's amazing what else did you say it was quite good it was all little like golf puns wasn't it yeah quite liked it yeah it was good it's been pretty chilled have you been jet lagged I noticed you flew straight back and all that isn't it how's the time the first day you were good the first day was fine wasn't it and like second day it just like hit me I was like a zombie yeah it's worse I've been going back I think you've been good though with it on a whole what I haven't my own lover no no no bless you guys so what have you been doing while Pete's been away what have I been doing I've been doing some work I read a book yesterday out in the sun I burnt do you want to know where I've ended up burning where like my biceps inner thighs and one of my sorry to be crude testicles I've never had that before in my life how have you burned And your testicle?

11:00Your testicle? What the hell? I must have angled my knee up like that in such a way, in my swim shorts, that the sun was getting through to one of my soldiers. I've never had that in my life. Did you cut the net out of your shorts? The soldier must have been out of the barracks. It was like, you know, when you roast a marshmallow over a fight, it was like a shmore. A shmore. You strike me as an undies under trunk kind of guy. Can you imagine? Can you actually imagine the view of Gaz? I don't want to imagine Gaz's knots. He's sitting opposite him. No offense, Gaz. You can allow yourself to imagine, guys.

11:37Wow. Do you wear undies under trunks? I don't. Not since maybe I was five years old, Ab. I'm surprised at that. Why do people do that? I don't know. You see the Calvins under the undies. Never really got that. Under the trunks. Oh yeah, like the new roadman look. I don't really get it, do you? No, people wear underpants under swimming trunks. Why? I've noticed that as well. But cool people are doing it now. People with six packs. I don't know why. That's what I consider cool. Pete's got a six pack and he doesn't do it. I just don't understand it, really. So we just keep it all in? Really? What about people who wear T-shirts in the pool?

12:24That does my head in. I don't know why. Like a rash vest? Yeah. There's nothing worse than, like, a fully grown man in a swim top. I don't mind them. Like what? Like surfers and stuff? Oh, yeah. A surf is a different... It's a wetsuit, isn't it? No, like... Like, if there's a fully grown man in a pool with a... Yeah. And he's got this cap with the long bit at the back. The neck flap? Yeah. Mm. That's not acceptable, I don't think, around the pool. Do you? No. No. No. Although I did. I remember burning in Maldives once and I had to put one on, didn't I? Yeah, but you look quite fit in that, don't you?

12:59Thanks. I'll stop at you two. Get a room. Have you been reading abs? Have you read anything good? Reading, Gaz? Are you having a fucking laugh? I knew you might say that. Have you had a chance to read one chapter? Have I had a chance to read one word? No. No. Not at all. I've asked for you, aren't you? it's you know no it's not harassed it's just um some of the the kids activities and the kids school drop-offs it is as a two-man job um and then while they're in school i have to get all the other stuff done so now unfortunately no time to read i have got a book um is it jojo Moyes yeah I see her around a lot do you read her a lot I've got a new book it's about this man and wife who I've just bought their dream home and it's a doer opera and they've got a few kids and then their husband leaves the wife for a mom at the school and now they're having a baby what and I was like fucking hell I hope that's not like us we've just got a new house we've got kids yeah I've just had a baby one of the mums you did get that weird message the other day did I?

14:23yeah I'm calling you off another number dad do you remember I was like who the fuck's that oh my god I was like who is this do you remember I was like you're a secret child secret child no that's not that's not for me no thanks that's not for me it's not it's not a bit of you No, not at all. Okay, we're going to get some audience wines, Gaz, all right? Let's do it, mate. Father's Day, fast approaching. I'm once again browsing cards online and having an internal crisis. The only card shop in my village has about four cards, and they either say you're my eternal hero, or they're just weirdly aggressive, crude humour, calling him an old bastard in need of hip replacement.

15:02Calling my dad the dog's bollocks with a picture of a dog licking its own balls just isn't my vibe. the remaining options are a moon pig but I've done that to death or just making him something from scratch I'm 39 making him something from scratch feels like something more relevant for his grandkids to be doing rather than me what do you reckon a middle aged man making another slightly older man a homemade card thumbs up or thumbs down love the show Jeff yeah what do we think thoughts what is surely there's an age limit of homemade cards does feel that way I think if I made my dad a card I think he would find me very strange I think he'd be like why?

15:48why have you done that? although some people are very creative aren't they and can make really cool things like if you're an artist yeah mine would be really bog standard you've made me a birthday card once with just a piece of paper folded in half with happy birthday on it and like a pencil that you just found in a drawer and I know it was it wasn't you know sometimes you know you think the handmade cards there's more love in them and but you know that just was like Peter forgotten to buy me one did you not did you not did you not find that with that one no no I don't know is it acceptable I think yeah if you start moving Peter to death could he get his children has he got children his children to make one yeah he said grandkids yeah Or he could just go to another shop.

16:39He could just venture out of his village to get something more appropriate and then that's problem solved. Yeah. That's a very valid point. Lazy bastard.

16:52Fair enough. Okay. Okay. Hi, guys. Love the part. Always make me hell coming back from the school run. On the topic of Father's Day wines, my wine is my dad's voice notes. I love my dad, but he started sending me daily six-minute recordings that are 90 % breathing, kettle noise, and my mum shouting what every 30 seconds because he hasn't told her. He's sending me a voice note and she just assumes he's talking to her. He also signs him off with over and out like he's in line of duty. Who knew your own dad could give you the ick? I love him, but it needs to stop. Any advice on how to handle him would be greatly appreciated.

17:30And while we're at it, he's become addicted to Facebook Marketplace. He thinks he's the next Dell boy wheeling and dealing constantly. He takes great pleasure in recounting how he got£3.50 off an old Elvis vinyl to anyone who listened. He sounds great. I love a voice note. I'm not a fan. I love them. It's really not for me.

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18:30Get the good times going with made-in-house chicken or pork sausages and ready-to-cook kebabs for hassle-free flavor. Grab tasty flatbreads and their new balsamic chicken salad in the prepared foods department. Keep things fresh with organic red cherries, strawberries, and peaches at their peak. And stock up on bug sprays and sun care must-haves. Make your summer sizzle at Whole Foods Market. I always send them because sometimes a Texan come out wrong. Yeah, we can get the tone of voice. At least if you send a voice, you've got the tone. Or, you know, sometimes you've got more to say than... I can just go in a text.

19:11I know you like them. I sometimes don't listen to them. From me? I listen to all yours. Yours are very special to me. You don't even answer messages from people? I just don't. I don't like to listen to them. I think if they go on, like, more than 10, 20 seconds, Well, you know, you can speed them up. Yeah. You can do the tap. But I get it. It's a good invention. Yeah, there's like two camps, isn't it? You're either pro-voice note or anti-voice note. I find this like a different place, but I think I'm more abby. I think I prefer a voice note. I kind of hate looking down all the time at the screen.

19:46I want to look at the screen less. So if I can just listen and walk around and hear the voice, I find that more of an easy experience. But I like playing on my phone on loudspeaker. I like loudspeaker. I don't put it to my ear. Again, I think that's... What? Why? Everyone else has to hear your conversation. Yeah, but it's like kind of kills two birds then because otherwise I'd get off the phone and go, can you believe this? So you want me to listen in? At least you can hear it in real time. Okay, and then we'll just talk about it after. but old people and technology it is funny isn't it it's funny it's like every time I FaceTime my dad and he's like tries to you know it's upside down they don't know how to flip it but I'm like that now it's just people ask me to put me put my airdrop on and send pins I'm like what the hell I don't know how to do any of that but I don't want to know well I know we are particularly useless yeah I would say you're good I'm doing right well anytime I get something on on Netflix or something or like I've not been able to Netflix watch Netflix the whole time you've been away that's impossible because I don't know how to log in it says ready to launch or something I press it just nothing happens you need to fix that before you go actually I'll tell you babe not a problem and leave me a bank card this time please

21:21okay because no people don't use Apple Pay here there's a lot of cash in Revolut they're still cash it's still cash based mainly yeah okay love the pod keep it up hey guys your secret your secret listener with his pelvic floor workout plan here oh no oh my god not him again last week yeah fantastic yeah glad to hear your advice and glad I got the laugh on the pod and glad I got a laugh on the pod made me feel a bit better about it. I now realise that I made that sound like I'm almost my girlfriend's vaginal personal trainer. I did, however, do a little bit more research and found that pelvic floor exercises do improve muscle control.

22:06No, of course. They do. That's what we said. Yeah. Don't you pelvic floor? Keeps everything. Is that what the problem was, though? His was that he didn't really get in, right, I think? I thought Tez was too strong. She needed to kind of loosen it.

22:31Fucking hell. Yeah, okay. So they do improve muscle control, which helps the muscles around the vagina relax and stretch more easily, which I probably should have made clear. You learn something new every day. However, that wasn't what I took away from your advice. I wanted to say that from this I think that I've learned I just need to confide in my girlfriend about these things and be upfront and honest about my feelings as clearly as I clearly said in my very poorly worded message before she is the love of my life but as Abby said she needs to be relaxed and now I feel guilty that now I haven't been doing enough for her in that respect so I really appreciate all of your advice absolutely no hard feelings about the laughter and awkwardness always think the best way to deal with something like that is to laugh.

23:24Peace, love and football's coming home. Your secret listener, the pelvic floor PT.

23:32Well, he was basically coaching his wife through pelvic floor exercises. What? I did feel a bit. But you know, listen, he took it with good heart. I don't know what we said to him. I'm pretty sure it wasn't. No, I think he just laughed. he needs to get relaxed and yeah i think he needs to just chill yeah and just chill although right in 10 minutes ago i love our community they're wonderful someone just wrote in so it's probably not the funniest but i've just listened to your episode about long distance disasters and felt the guy wrote in about his girlfriend and their difficulties being intimate uh google vaginismus sounds like a latin and what is that yeah it's uh from what that man described it sounds very similar to what I've experienced vaginissimus is when you may want to have sex but your pelvic floor muscles involuntarily tense up making intercourse extremely painful or even impossible they go on to talk more about it but yeah there you go maybe give that a google maybe we need like a vaginal expert on to help us because I don't I've never heard of that I'm going to move on swiftly abs Pete and the team can I start by saying your podcast has helped me through some rough times recently with numerous trips to and from the Sacreville Hospital to see my nan.

24:50Were you? I see my mum. Sorry, see my nan and stuff like that so thank you. My soon-to-be wife is almost faultless. We get on well. How dare he? Genuinely enjoy spending time together whether that be meals, drinks, or chilling on the couch watching some bollocks that she enjoys. I have a couple of wines and that is she never puts things back in the cupboards properly. The amount of times after reorganizing, cleaning the cupboards, because she's thrown a piece of Tupperware into it, like a pro MLB play, Major League Baseball player, it's crazy. She slams things around, not angrily, just heavily, and she slams doors to the point where she, where the screws for the handle have been ripped out.

25:35I've brought this up, and I asked her why she has to slam things around instead of just putting things down like a normal person, and just lob things into cupboards, but she repeatedly says she doesn't. What more can I do? Am I overreacting? Thank you. I love it. Yeah, I'm kind of with them on this one. The thought of me rearranging a cupboard that you've left a mess is very alien to me. Well, I do it every single day with Liberty's wardrobe. Well, you're very OCD. I think I've got OCD. Well, yeah, you are a bit like that, aren't you? I just think it's... you want to live in a clean and organised environment what's the deal with that slamming doors and stuff hold on don't you think you slam doors do I?

26:26yeah when? when you're in a huff oh yeah if I'm angry or something like that Pete slammed a door once you know the thing it flicked the other way so I was like locked in the kitchen he slammed the door that was my intention Slams the door that hard, it would flick the other way, do you remember? And I'm stuck in, he's like, oh, sorry. Oh, sorry. You pushed me to the point of the return. It's so babyish, lemon does. Yeah, I agree. It is. I don't do it often. No. But yeah, door slams. It's not really like a massive door slam. It's more of just letting you know that that was a firm door shut. then your baby won't be tolerated yeah what's the correct way to slam a car door because I always feel like people eat absolutely ragged like bang like that I hate people who slam car doors I think you can slam a car door if you're on a hill and it shuts heavily but I don't think you need to slam a car door especially when there's little fingers knocking about didn't Johnny trap his fingers in the door yesterday yeah he kind of did I never know about Johnny because he's like he can overreact I would say if he had just like oh oh oh I'm like oh my god is he yeah what I've realised is he needs to be on the stage yeah he might not have hurt himself he's like he's like a modern footballer yeah like diving around diving around yeah he dives on the floor and stuff like that yeah yeah God love him bless him I hope he's alright right guys I thought because it is Father's Day we can have a little sort of just like a deep dive, Pete, a quick one into father's days of old, et cetera.

28:13Like what has been your, can you think off the top of your head, maybe your most favourite father's day? I think it's quite, it's quite like simple for me. Like I would like to probably go out and play golf. Yeah. In the morning. I'm fine with that. And then have a lovely lunch with the family. Well, that was kind of the plan today, to be honest, but it just didn't, because I saw Pete's friend, Bobby, and I was like, can you plan, can you help me sought the golf even though you're a member at this golf club so I said you can play golf not you can play golf would you like to play golf in the morning and then I booked a lovely lunch but it all went peat tongue didn't it well we went we actually did go for a lovely lunch yeah but I think yeah it was just it's just nice to chill isn't it you've been so busy and your jet like really kicked in as well yeah so it's just been nice being with the kids and having a chill really yeah I think that's just a simple thing isn't it I think it's nice to be kind of made a fuss off in the morning with the kids and stuff and then I just want them at arm's length really for the rest of the day you don't want to see them did you get the vomiting bug that they all had or did you guys survive that yeah no we've not been great have we no really unfortunately yeah oh no guys it's the last thing you need Jesus it's not ideal and how was your how was your reunion when you guys got saw each other again is it hard because you jet lagged or was it nice no it was nice wasn't it no it was nice I think it's actually been really hard being a part apart I know it hasn't been that long and people do it on a regular basis but you know it's not just me it was Miss Pete it's the kids as well so they were so happy to see him and I was nice to do a bit of a it was just nice for Pete to experience or have experience a few days so it's like you're not just a moaning bitch who's constantly complaining he's you know saw it with his own two eyes kids have been little monkeys haven't they yeah but you know they're feeling good now handy and what's the plan for after all this abs is there any plan to get you out in the states how are you feeling about anything like that Yeah, I think the kids will say out the term.

30:39And, you know, it's hard because Sophia's doing her GCSEs and, you know, the time difference. So I think once school's over, we'll come out for a nice holiday. You know, the kids are desperate to go to some of these shops that they've seen on TikTok. That's mad, isn't it? What's this thing? Is it air or something? What's this thing that they keep saying cooked to me all the time? Oh, you're so cooked. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah, yeah. Can they say that? yeah what does that even mean I just get visions of you with that cock what's that thing clucks thing what he talks about yeah I told you that cocky hutch or whatever he's cocky hutch what is that what's that thing Gaz always talks about yeah yeah he does always talk about it what's it called cluck alert yeah I still don't know what it is yeah but the kids always say that to me cooked oh cooked what does it mean oh cooked cooked and cucks are two different things yeah they're very much two different things why what what's the difference well it's quite a big difference well I for one don't know what any of them mean I'm just trying to be down with the kids and clearly not yeah but yeah there's one like Hayley Bieber or something it's got like a green juice that costs like$30 or something oh my god that's the one that's the shop they want to go to I forgot what it's called now and they want to go to Target So they're just obsessed with Target.

32:06And get some squishies. We went to Target in Orlando though, didn't we? Yeah, we did, yeah. It's great, to be fair. It is good. What's good? It wasn't cheap though. It's like a Woolworths though. Isn't it just like an old-fashioned store? It's like a Costco or something, isn't it really? It's got everything. It's like a home and bargaining. Home bargaining. Yeah. Home bargaining. What was good? Superstore. Superstore. and can I still can I still hold you to taking me out to a makeover are you still alright to take me out oh yeah I did yeah we can do a show what would you go with Gaz what would you go for I think well I'll let I'll let Ab's take the lead I think we've got to start at Calvin Klein and get some white white undies I think that's essential but then I don't know where to go from there on I don't want I don't want to see your own burnt nut you can buy your own undies I want to see that I can't believe you've burnt your ball I am I've never done it in my life crazy I can't believe it it shouldn't be out should it it shouldn't be I didn't even notice it was they must be quite like you know resilient small then balling I'm so cooked what does that mean welcome is to be cooked is is uh C-O-O-K that's like someone's absolutely like had your pants down like you're cooked like you're you're finished you're done yeah yeah yeah but cuck is is more of a sexual thing which is why I couldn't tell what they were saying to you oh okay yeah yeah I'm actually quite excited to give you a makeover how far are we gonna go are we is it just clothes is it do you want to give him a haircut or is it like hair and I'll do the I'll do the hair personality you could do the whole thing just reshape me no personality is good I'm teasing I don't actually think we need to touch the hair See I don't know What do you think Can I ask your honest Honest opinions A pair of you So I used to always Just have short back and sides And a quiff And in some ways I still miss that And I I don't know My girlfriend was like I like the kind of mullet Keep the mullet So I'm kind of doing it more for her Than anyone else But I'm not mad at it What do you think I think most men Do do their hair for the girls I like long hair In men Personally Yeah I don't mind a mullet guys I love a mullet Oh John used to have a mullet It's just those white linens With the black undies on a daily basis.

34:34There's got to go, really. There's got to go. Are they all your undies in the background? Yeah, literally. There's like a whole row there that you can see. All black, look. All black. How many pairs did you take? I think I brought about 10. I think just the whites are just usually like, I don't know, they don't last as long for obvious reasons. So I can't believe he's got that amazing view of like Beverly Hills. Well, I'm actually just glad that he's washing them. Yeah. So do you know how to use a washing machine, Gaz? No, you just sort of just turn it on, right? And that's it. No, of course. Yeah, we actually have struggled here.

35:14We can't really find any good washing stuff in the villa. I'll send you over some aerial, the big one. Thanks, mate. Big spill, big deal. You haven't even given me any of those. Have we got some? We haven't even keep saying that. I have, I've got some. did do you not have them yeah of course we have I'm going to do some agony abs babe hello therapy crouch hosts very formal that's very formal yeah first of all love the pod got me through many commutes gym sessions and moments of pretending to work while actually listening to Peter tell a story that goes absolutely nowhere oh wait hang on before you read this I must say I've read this this might have just been the best email we've ever had I couldn't believe it I'll let you take it really that's a show Gaz but I was reading it with my jaw on the floor I was like we have to read this out so you go for it wow I need to stay anonymous because if my boyfriend ever finds out that I've sent this in he'll probably have a better explanation than I do and frankly that's what I'm terrified of I've been with my boyfriend for six years we're in a really good place and until recently I was convinced we were heading towards an engagement maybe even marriage we've survived all the big relationship tests family gatherings, moving house, assembling IKEA furniture, choosing a film to watch without filing for divorce.

36:37I hate that, dear. That is annoying, that, filing the film. Then last week, my entire understanding of the man was shattered. I got home from work about half an hour earlier than usual. Oh, no. And my boyfriend normally finishes before me, so he had absolutely no reason to expect me. As I walked in, I could hear movement upstairs in our bedroom, and I thought I'd go up and say hello. Instead, I opened the bedroom door and witnessed something that can only be described as a glitch in the Matrix. There stood my boyfriend, fully dressed in his work suit. But over the top of the suit, he was wearing a set of my lingerie.

37:16Now, if he'd just been standing there looking embarrassed, I could probably have done with that. I could work with that. But no, he was dancing. Oh, my God. And not normal dancing, not nightclub dancing, not dad dancing, not even Peter Crouch at a wedding dancing. He was shuffling around, sideways around the room in a crouched position, arms bent, doing what looked like a crab impression. Like some from the office? I was thinking that. Yeah, the David Brent, that one. Yeah. Imagine a middle-aged, imagine a middle manager possessed by a crustacean. It's a thing though Some men like to put on girls Knickers I know they do Imagine Abby Walking in on Peter Doing the robot Whilst wearing her bra He says She says That's roughly the scene For about three seconds We locked eyes I froze He froze The crab froze Nobody said a word I slowly backed out Of the room Like I'd accidentally Interrupted a government Experiment Since then We've both Completely ignored it Oh god no The atmosphere in the house Is bizarre Every conversation Feels loaded How was work?

38:26Good. Anything exciting happened? No. You? Not really. Certainly. No lacy underwear. Nothing involved lacy underwear and marine life. The worst part is he's acting completely normal. Meanwhile, every time I look at him, I can just see a six foot crab in business attire. I'm not upset. I'm not judging him. I'm just desperate to understand what on earth I walked in on. She just needs to ask him. Therapy crouch, what do I do? Do I bring it up and pretend, or do I pretend it never happened? Do I buy him his own lingerie and let him live his best crustacean? And most importantly, is there any explanation for a man wearing a work suit and women's underwear while performing an interpretive crab dance around the bedroom?

39:08Did he have music on? Was he dancing in the mirror? Or just freely in the room? She doesn't specify. And she's been quite detailed, so I'm going to say no. I think he's just dancing alone. God, in the room. That was so well written. Can you imagine walking on that? What would you say if I... We dressed Jason up. What would you say if I was, like, dancing and I had your underwear on? I'd just be like, what the fuck are you doing? I don't think you would let that go. No. Do you know what I mean? There's no way... To be honest, you know, you're not hurting anyone, are you? If you want to put your wife's sneakers on, you can.

39:51but in order to not make it a big issue she needs to say to him you know I just I would like some you know insight into into your mindset yeah why you're doing it and you know it's not a problem you know yeah you listen to each their own when I like have no jammies I get like your undies out the bag and draw and t-shirt and put that on slightly different if I put a pair of yours I don't think mine might fit you well no I don't I should hope not we dressed our friend Jason up in a girl's bikini and thigh boots once hysterical after a night out and he came out in like this silver one piece and like le bouton thigh boots and he you know his body for like a girl was like unreal but he's I think he'd be really pleased that we've brought that up on the podcast considering he said we took pictures of it and he was like these cats see the light of day that sounds really dodge now but it wasn't it's all like hard to find we found it hilarious no I think she just needs to be honest and be like why are you doing that like what's your what's your what are you up to just say like you know anything I can help with I just think you can't ignore the elephant in the room yeah why was he why was he squatting that's what she kind of goes into detail more about the dance than the lingerie it's like the dance yeah as if the dance was the one that did it yeah which is just so bizarre I would have found it hard not to say what on earth there and then well I know you'd just be like when I come in the room and you just put normal outfits on I'm like what the hell are you doing yeah yeah yeah I've chosen an outfit I've got my knickers over it yeah because it baffles me the way you have a suit like a a two piece suit and would like wear the pants from one and a jacket from the other I just can't stand that but we've got to the bottom of the fact that I'm so far ahead of you fashion wise that you you catch you catch up like I'm doing trends before they before they happen before you catch on to them yeah I'll take I'll go with that right I think that's we should probably start to wind this down the next one I've just realised is a duplicate so ignore that I'll ask you just kind of yeah a duplicate bit in LA two weeks Duplicate.

42:16Should we just say duplicate? Oh, God, I'm changing. It's duplica, isn't it? Yeah. Duplicate, yeah, you're right. Oh, can I say on that, I was watching the game last night, it was Tunisia versus, oh, who was it now? Oh, Japan. Japan, yeah. They kept saying 50 times, Tunja or something like that? Tunja. And I was like, I don't understand. What does that mean? I just can't say Tunisia. I don't know why, they've just pronounced it wrong. Oh, really? is here yeah can i just can i have a little moan can i have my time for an agony abs yes you the u.s vibe i'm missing a bit i'm like i'm spoiled rotten i love it to death i wouldn't change it for the world but i'm missing the uk culture when it comes to football the you know god bless the americans but the chants are diabolical god bless the americans they say and like even the american commentary i'd rather just sit in silence it's just so grating shoot the ball you got to shoot the ball.

43:12He's hit two. He's hit two so far. He's not a golfer, is he? I don't know. That's like me when I when I'm on the sidelines screaming at my son to kick and run faster and hit it. Yeah, that's not correct. I don't know the lingo. Yeah. You need to brush up on that. What do you say then? Get stuck in. That's fine. Get stuck in. Run. Run. Yeah. I don't know the lingo. yeah tackle it sounds right coming from you abs I don't know but when I hear even like Americans that try and they hear our terms like smash it he got smashed and they say it it just doesn't sound right oh my god he got smashed well I was there the superior player of the match got me what's that well it's the superior of the match you know player of the match oh superior player yeah don't they have MVP they have MVP don't they on this particular game it was superior player of the match yeah yeah I was watching that it was John Obi McKell he was like so and so and so and so and that's why he's my superior player of the match I was like what on earth what's going on here it's like everyone gets a medal but you were the superior one you know it's like strange well I'm glad you got that off your chest cheers mate cheers what about you guys then what are you up to for the next few days mate I am going to bed I've got this time zone thing's not for me no and you have been working hard thank you you did travel for like 20 hours to see us which I appreciate so and it is Father's Day so I will let you have a rest I'll allow it I would fly anywhere around the world for you babe thanks oh that moth just got out your mouth yeah John Coffey from the Green Mile what a reference great alright guys listen I'll see you soon mate yeah guys I'm looking forward to seeing you I can't wait Make sure that house is spick and span by the time I get there.

45:12Yeah, we'll do. I'll get to work. Okay. Have a good day, guys. Get to work. See you later. Bye. Bye.

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