The Silent Red Flag in Long-Term Relationships & Is Filming in Gyms Completely Out of Control?!

0:28Okay, so what do we need? Head to toe. I've put my gym stuff on and said, just been the gym. Oh, f***. R Ross, R Abby and R P. Starts off with me. He didn't actually.

0:44Ask me anything. Hello and welcome to the Therapy Crouch. Ask us anything with me, Abby Clancy. Me, Peter Crouch. How are you feeling there, Abs? I've just got a sore throat. Losing my voice. shivery fresh as flu yeah fresh as flu exactly yeah no I'm alright yeah you good how are you Pete I'm good yeah top of the world good week yeah nice week yeah still in the swim squad lots of fun still swimming yeah me and Sophia have been getting up a little bit early and going well I've only done it once I was just about to say I rate that when I've only done it once but we I've just said to them before that we could try and do it like I don't know two three times a week I think that'd be nice yeah do feel better because outdoor swimming as well it feels like almost like a cryotherapy getting in there and then once you're in it's like it's a little bit of exercise and then it's like the cold hits you again and then you're really ready for your day I love when you're in those like heated outdoor pools and you can see like the steam coming off it's like a hot bath isn't it exactly what it was like so the pool's heated yes but when you get out it's so cold getting in there and out it's very cold getting in and out but I think that freshness in the morning really wakes you up.

1:59I agree, it's agreed. It is good, but I hate the cold, so I will not be joining. Yeah. I go in the indoor. I'd rather be too cold and too hot though, every day of the week. Because you can warm up, you can't really cool down always. No, if you can't warm up. Yeah. Cold's horrible. It's cold's painful. Sweat's like more annoying, but like cold is painful, isn't it? My bones. Cold's my bones. Can be. Sometimes when I do the football, TNT and stuff, we're on the sideline and then we're watching the crowd and then we're back, like for a night game in the middle of December you're like oh no I always under club it always with the clothes yeah like I don't it's not like you Pete you go style over substance do you yeah I mean I look incredible no it's because you wear that paper thin coat that I absolutely hate that long one the wool one the grey one yeah yeah I hate it it's like a bloody undertaker in it and it's so thin it's so thin it's full of bubbles you've ever seen Rodney when he's walking by the hearth I just hate that coat so much but you thanks babe but I tell you every time can I just say that the rules and the slit up the back can I say the rules for G &T are a tailored coat get a new one be my advice that'd be a good present for you birthday there we go get yourself down to Rhys he's flying lad no he needs to get accustomed because he's too too tall get yourself down to too tall is that you're too tall I've got some nice coats Of course they are.

3:26Nothing wrong with 2Tool.com. But yeah, I, yeah. There's rules that you've got to follow. There's rules that you've got to follow. There's rules that you have to follow. Yeah, there is. Understood. But you've got all the heated, like you don't, what cracks me up is like when you go to work and you stand on the sideline, you're freezing cold. But when you go to golf, you've got your heated gelay on and your bloody hand warmers in your pockets. I don't care what I look like there. But you can wear that under the coat. No one would see it. Yeah. But there's heated gelays. listen what I say is I go to I go to the game and I quite often I'm in a warm house thinking I'll be fine and then I get there and I'm fucking crazy in a warm house in a warm house what about when you were playing I know we won't get into it but what about when you were playing and you sat in shorts and it's like do you ever think fucking hell how did I manage this no when you're playing you just on the bench or being a sub oh yeah bench I've been in a few ice foot situations and you're thinking I can't feel my toes I'm not going to go on and play so there has been a bit of that my hands were numb the other day do you ever have that?

4:28no your hands go numb in the cold and it takes a bit of time for the feeling to come back isn't that a condition where they go purple as well? true not no I don't have that but my fingers are numb and my toes that's too cold that is too cold that's happened to me millions of times has it? yeah just fingers and toes get it the most right? the extremities because the blood leaves the extremities the protected organs like hypothermic kicks in. I think it's got to be the toes. That's why your fingers fall off, yeah. Yeah, the fingers fall off and stuff like that. It's the first to go. It's the kind of last bit of you, isn't it, I suppose?

5:02Should I get to some AMAs? Let's go. Hi, Abby and Peter. Firstly, wishing you guys a happy new year. I hope you in 2026 is as fabulous as you guys are. Just a quick one for me. I'm single going into 2026 and everyone keeps asking me if I'm going to meet someone this year. I've been putting pressure on myself, swiping on dating apps and even tried speed dating. last time I went on a date they showed up wearing a t-shirt that said it's not me it's you and spent the evening lecturing me about their conspiracy theories wasn't you Ross was it yeah it's just right up your alley both the t-shirt and the conspiracy that's a famous t-shirt isn't it it's not me it's you would you wear that to a first date because that's usually something you say when you break up as well isn't it do you know what I mean I think that's a ranter yeah nah shut up if I turned up first date and I had that t-shirt but you can read it she sounds paranoid to me you can read it she's putting pressure on herself I think you can read into things I agree I think also you're going to meet someone when you meet someone like I think if you go and some people are throwing themselves at her it's not going to happen is it really no chill out can I just say the first date situation it's not me it's you that's just oh yeah come on it's bad if you know them and you're like you know whatever but I think for the first date that's too too a bit much for me a bit rich for me But I wouldn't even read someone's t-shirt.

6:23Yeah, of course you would. If it was just a slogan, one slogan. You put people wear those things. It's a good thing, isn't they? A couple of the conspiracy chat as well. He sounds quite bold. He knows who he is. And he knows what he wants. I like his conspiracy chat. Yeah, me too. I don't mind a conspiracy chat. No, we should do another conspiracy episode soon. We should. Okay, R Ross, R Abby and R P. Starts off with me. Oh, they didn't actually. I was running back. Why did you do that? Because I was looking at the R's and I went, I'd read it all first and then I went backwards. There's my bubble there.

7:02I'm sorry, mate. Oh, Scott. Yeah. Scott, over the festive period, I offered to cook for a group of friends. My first time doing a proper dinner party. Long story short, cooking for 12 people is a whole different ballgame than two or three, especially with the Elvino was flowing. In other words, the atmosphere was great, but the food was shit. By the time anyone ate, everything was cold and I was too hot and bothered, pissed, to eat and enjoy myself. I will say I talked a bit of a game up, a big game up beforehand as I would consider myself a dab hand in the kitchen. But in this case, I may have over-hegged the omelette.

7:36My mates are made up as I would, would the shoe be on the other foot. But now I am on the receiving end of come dine with me gifts and memes that are pissing me right off. I want to try and redeem myself but I'm also thinking, fuck them and then I'm also thinking what if I balls the whole thing up again I'll have lost the salad dressing room dining room happy new year well I'm always cooking for large I'm used to that but if you if you kind of talk the big talk and then you've ballsed it up what would you do but it's I think it's a lot of pressure cooking for a lot of people yeah and keeping it warm and it depends on you know your kitchen like if you've got a microwave an oven or just a microwave oven or four ovens and two microwaves yeah yeah do you know what I mean like it's for me personally I know what I'd feel like that I'd embrace that I'd have a laugh with it and go oh my god that was horrendous let me make it up to you yeah and then try again next time I wouldn't say let me make it up to you no I need another punt at that I need a little go at that yeah or she could make a cold dish yeah she could just do salads or stuff prepping the night before and like kind of reheat it on the day of and stuff like that maybe no do you know what I think or something that's sheer like a curry because you can just put that out can't you the atmosphere was good that's the main thing for a party and a dinner 100 % the food's secondary every time I make a dinner I'm never hungry when you dish now because you're eating it the whole way through yeah I drink it we're a large group 12 people why don't you just do like a drinks night redeem yourself that way yeah some canapes or something.

9:18I've got a couple of pizzas. Yeah. Perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Like make light of it. Yeah. We're going to do pizzas and great wine. Regardless of the family and all that jazz. I'm going to jump straight in here. January was meant to be the month. I sorted my finances out. No takeaways, no random spends, proper budgeting. Instead, my car failed. It's MOT. My boilers on the blink and my banking apps are working overtime. I've not, I've not even enjoyed myself. I'm just skin and cold. on paper January sounds like a good month to get back on track with lifestyle choices but considering you get paid early in December and have so much going on between then and the end of January is it feasible to have a financial reset here or am I just fucking useless no I think she's right I think January because we were saying earlier on in the week January is you know don't beat yourself up if you don't go to the gym on the second of Jan be kind to yourself be kind to yourself it's a tough month like everyone is exhausted you have spent all your money you've eaten drank your body weight I think just January should just be a little bit of a chill you could think and plan and then put everything that you want to do into action come Feb yeah I agree I don't think it's fucking useless thought and I think as well like things like your MOT failing and your boiler breaking down that's an unforeseeable thing that you can't can't bind you for that can you and these things happen but yeah I suppose you've got to have a little bit tucked away for these eventual disasters, but especially because of the way you get paid over Christmas as well.

10:51That needs to change. Yeah, that is a killer. You need like a... A buffer. You need like a mid-payment or something. You need like an Abbey payment 10th of Jan, right? A birthday 10th of Jan. I think we should just be like, that's when you should get a little bit more. Yeah, yeah. Top off. The bonus should come 12th of Jan. Yeah, yeah. I agree, yeah. I think that should work. I think that should work. I think you should change Christmas because January, the day after Christmas, all the sales hit and everything that you bought is like half price in the sale. Like you get emails from everywhere that you bought from.

11:22If you just moved it to like the 29th of Jan, you could buy it all in the sale half price. If you moved the Lord's birthday to the 29th, why don't they just move from the sales from the 26th to the fucking week before? For that reason. Everyone's bought the Christmas presents. You keep the prices high. Yeah, that's obvious. But what I'm saying is you're saying so why don't they move Christmas to the 29th? because they're the same thing personally Christmas can stay where it is oh I see we're not moving Christmas we're not that we're not that good just saying I think personally you should get paid midway through January smaller amounts tide you over till you get paid properly right this is one of those call to arms little interludes in the podcast which I hate and I'm sure you hate as well but it actually does make a huge difference if you subscribe because we're making top quality content and if you want more of it we need you to subscribe so hit the button.

12:16Hey Clance, the Cardi P and the Tudor Bob. One of my resolutions this year was to take more time to be kinder to myself and invest in my mental and physical well-being. Nice. Good plan. Off the back of a recommendation from a friend who does daily hot girl mental health walks. Is this usually from you? No, no, no. But I like the sound of it. Hot girl mental health walks. I've made an effort to try and walk more this January to clear my head and I've quickly discovered I hate the general public. People stopping dead in the pavement. Groups alike, three abreast, someone letting their dog shit and just standing there looking at it.

12:51I nearly shouted at man yesterday for zigzagging every time I went to overtake. I'm not sure if I can keep this up, but I'm feeling the benefit of the gentle exercise and keeping out in the fresh air. Is this a me problem? Or are there other things I could be doing that would have a positive effect? I'm happy. This is so weird because this morning I took the dogs for a walk, nice and early. and I went to a common, like a forest really. And I only go when I drop one of my daughters off to school because it's near there. And I don't go as, you know, because I'll probably take the boys into school more.

13:26And I went on this walk and there's no one there. No one. See, I'd be scared of that then. Just a forest. I think as a female, you're scared to be in that situation. You shouldn't be, but you are. Yeah. There was a flasher in our local woods the other day. should have seen him look like Sam Smith full leather head to toe did you see him? leather flat cap chains because we were on the phone look like Sam Smith fishnets we were on the phone to each other and you were Pete was in a meeting with us and you just said Pete Peter the flasher come quick I had a zoom call it's quite an important one yeah I know you were shouting about a flasher we didn't actually see her but one of the we were in the same park and on the WhatsApp group on the mum's group it was like he's been spotted there now and I was like no one of the mums was like she's funny as hell she went oh great where is he what tree is he by I'm on my way unbelievable but the moral of the story was I don't see anyone on that walk and I go around it and I'd make a point to put my phone in my pocket and not look at it and just walk and the amount of things you could think about and like clear your head and you kind of come out of there feeling so much better.

14:43I like that. No, genuinely, yeah. And then, but again, you know, there are people, I suppose if you live in a built up area and I'm like, 100%. We were coming home on the Eurostar the other day and there was a man snoring. Like, you wouldn't believe how loud it was. It was phenomenal. His whole body was going, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I thought it was repulsive and I thought it was so bad mannered and so rude and like I couldn't believe it and his friend was just letting it happen as well. That was, it was the friend for me. Like I suppose if you're asleep, you don't know.

15:20They were in English. Yeah. But I thought his mate were like, everyone in the carriage was going, how have I? Look at this. Because even when you heavy breathe when you're asleep on the train, like with your mouth like wide. You just give me a massive nudge. Yeah, because I think it's... Woke me up three times. I think it's disrespectful. Four times then. I think it's bad manners in a public place. Do you know what I mean? you can't what can you do you'd die if you were on the commuter train I mean that's just commonplace I think yeah people snore like that not like the way you were just doing it but a lot of people nodding off and breathing or like you know when people are like nervous leaving their head jolt forward yeah like that no we don't mind that but if and I think if you're on your own and no one can monitor it but if you sit next to your friend like I'm talking it was mad it was so it was as loud as a lawnmower a leaf blower wasn't it it was ridiculous the whole carriage disgusting I'm surprised you didn't say something I was scared yeah fair enough but yeah I think but the general public are also annoying that leads on to your fact as well doesn't it the general public are annoying yeah slow walkers you famously can't stand them Peter people who zigzag people who walk across the pavements not a vibe but walking is a good thing we did say there was too many humans we say that a lot I did say that a lot there are too many men too many men there is a bit but I think walking's a lovely thing to do I think you just need to find yourself a little bit more private for that walk yeah find the most path or something I love it okay help when you're trying to be healthy and get in shape but the Gen Z cringe lords have different ideas I went to the gym in January like everyone else and I already regret it in quite a few days not because it's hard but because it's full of people filming themselves this needs to be thank you banned right agreed surely that I keep accidentally ending up in the background of someone's journey whilst I'm in the midst of throwing up on the treadmill I love our listeners I feel like we've got a load of mates I'm glad the cringelords aren't writing in do you know what I mean I'm glad they would they're on a different pod but that's self-help you put it all as a negative effect doesn't it because if you think about like the whole of instagram and everything what people do like you don't see people walk around and the general public looking like what people look like on instagram like we went to a hotel in dubai and the amount of people who were just what they weren't staying at the hotel they weren't having a meal at the hotel they weren't you know they were just going in to get a photograph for social media yeah it's like my 40th birthday i haven't got one photograph the whole night sign of a good time that's a sign of a good time isn't it I had two photographs and everyone else didn't have one photo I like that I had a photograph before I went out and I I had one photograph of the girls at the table and one of the boys and I'm not even in any of them there's not one selfie you know because we're just present and in the moment and I think with all that social media stuff it does have a massive negative effect on people's mental health like to compare yourself why am I doing this doing that well people don't want to go to the gym because they're thinking like I'm guilty of it myself I've put my gym stuff on and said just been gym have a fuck have a fuck

18:47I'll try going at 6am think it'd be quieter it's even worse even everyone there is aggressively motivated Russell Keane had it right that was the 5am why I'm kidding yeah how do I tackle this I don't want videos of me blowing up my arse broadcasting all over the internet without my consent but I also don't want to be the Jim Caron and even potentially ending up going viral telling off these Gen Z 5M well

19:13I love our audience personally great email great email yeah they're just on our wavelength 100 % I think you've got to go at your own pace I think you can't compare yourself I'm an advocate for staying fit I want to do it myself I want to be fitter healthier your health is the most important thing same as your mental health but it is a bit much I don't think pacing is the problem I think it's do a confront or do a not confront and do a avoid them in the gym I think what do you think about like guys doing like all the six track selfies and all that I think it's an absolute disgrace to be perfect honest I think when you walk into a gym right at reception you should hand your phone and put it in a locker they've got enough lockers there right there's a phone locker there should be phone lockers and everyone go bang phone's in there people are here to work out they don't give a fuck about your journey and they don't want they want to be in the background because for a lot of people that journey is good yeah which is great but you say if someone's lost two stone yeah I think that's good and it's motivational and if people are going this is where I started this is how I look now yeah but I agree with that if you're in your own home there are way too many people in the UK who are overweight and it's bad for your health but if you're filming someone while they're consent and they're having an absolute nightmare behind you and you're like that goes viral because there's some you know bigger fella sweating out of his arse on the video yeah and it's also someone like people I've seen people do it and they're actually laughing at the people that are behind them.

20:33You know what I mean? It's like, you're not filming yourself if you're not feeling how you look, right? Yeah. You're only doing it to show people how good you are. Yeah. Right? You know, and I think some of those people, they might be embarrassed to be in the back of that video, you know? Yeah. And it should be a safe haven where you can go, I guess, yeah. Anyone can go and work out. You should have specialist vein gyms. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, where you can go, you can film as much as you like. This could be a little business. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. You know, we're all going to go and do some filming in this gym.

21:02Yeah. And, you know, anyone who wants to actually do stuff, just go and do it there. I completely agree. 100%. I would feel very awkward if I was lifting my 5kgs. I was banging my 5kg. Choking yourself. And I was choking myself. And it fed on me again, you know. And I went viral because frigging, you know, Don Juan DeMarco is doing a fucking five-minute video. Yeah. I agree. I agree. we're with you we're with you solidarity solidarity firstly can I just say I love your podcast I've even ditched music in the gym okay as long as he doesn't film he's fine I must say every single one of our listeners is in the gym so little round of applause for that yeah yeah you know and we're not against gyms we're going to them every day yeah exactly I like it like Hollis I'm going in the morning yeah but she listens to the podcast or he but listens to the podcast while working out you make me laugh so much.

22:01Abby, I hear myself in you. You are hilarious and gorgeous. Okay, so enough of me going on. I would like to take some advice. Me and my partner have been together for five years. I have three children, oldest at college. We both live in separate houses. I like to wake up early. I have to be for the kids, anyway, for the kids. He doesn't. He likes slow mornings. He wakes up at eight for work. I wake up at six, which he thinks is far too early. and recently he's made the comment we could never live together he's planning on doing things to his house telling me all his plans and i can't help but feel a little bit sad saddened there's no mention of us moving in together if i mentioned future plans it's always when the kids are older and they've moved out that will be our time to do what we want and get what we want so is he not the dad of the kids no by sounds that they both live in separate houses bear in mind my youngest is Seven.

22:53Oof. What would you do or even say to that? Sending love. I've put your life on hold for 11 years. Can you? No. He probably thinks, oh God, I don't want to move in. We're all screaming, crying kids. Yeah. I've got my nice place. I can come back. I can have my lions. Yeah. But sorry, that wouldn't cut to it, me sister. I'd be like, I'm in or you're out. Yeah. It's probably in or out, isn't it? Yeah, I agree. Some people work, some people like living. separately yeah but it's not working for them because she wants to live together and he doesn't it would be okay if they both didn't want to but 11 years is too long to wait but she wants to wait for 11 years on the hope that they might have like a little good sunset years because no no it's too long a year or two max I think I think living together is a good thing yeah surely that's what that's a progressive relationship isn't it you should want to do it really you're supposed to be with someone because you enjoy the company and time and you build a life together don't you yeah I agree completely so what should she do have a word I think I have a word yeah a word yeah I think she should be saying look look all this talk of this house renovation has got me thinking about our relationship and I don't hear any mention of me being in this house where do I stand because he's got one of these January DMCs incoming hasn't he yeah where are we where are we headed 100 % where are we headed very good oh well well good luck with that one that's the AMAs is it yep our first January 1st I was enjoying that no more no more no more I'm going to go down to the gym and film my six pack you have got a six pack you've got quite a good six pack as well you can film thank you thank you yeah very good well see you next week see you next week thank you guys if you're liking what you're listening to hit that subscribe button because it really helps us and it's nearly 2026 and we want to get bigger and better so show us some love by hitting that button