#2888 The Valley S2E09: No Time to ReJax

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1:54Watch what happens when there's so much that happens. Watch what happens when there's so much that happens.

2:11Ronnie Karam: Well, hello, everybody. Welcome to Watch What Crappens. I'm Ronnie. That's Ben. Hi, Ben. Hi. How are you? Good. Welcome to your Wednesday. How is it? Thank you. In the life of Benjamin this Wednesday.

2:28Ben Mandelker: Wednesday. What a fun Wednesday it is. I'm going to be making my trek up to Seattle, which I love. Seattle is officially one of the cities I would move to if I weren't living in L.A. And so I'm always excited when we get to go up there. So I'm really excited for tonight when I get to fly up there. How's it going with you?

2:46Ronnie Karam: I see Seattle.

2:47Ben Mandelker: Good?

2:48Ronnie Karam: Yeah. I'm just chilling. I had to go get milk today, so I was very upset. Oh. Because I had to take a shower. Because you can't just go to the grocery store. I had to get all gussied up. Look at me. Just look gorgeous. Do a facial. Go wash myself. And I went to the store and I got some milk. So that's been my day so far. It was really exciting. I saw a lot of the hot people. What kind of milk do you get? Whole milk. What kind of milk? Oat. Did you say oat or whole? Whole milk. Whole milk. I'm a whole milk lover. Yeah. Wow. Get that oat milk out of my goddamn face. I think out of all of the milks, oat is the best.

3:24Ronnie Karam: Out of the non-milks.

3:26Ben Mandelker: I have grown to love oat milk. I used to hate oat milk for the longest time. But like in the past, like three months, oat milk has come out of nowhere and has really taken over my life. And now I am an only girly.

3:39Ronnie Karam: But I would prefer whole. Okay, everybody. Now that we've got our milk preferences out of the way, welcome to the Valley Recap. We are going to be in Seattle tomorrow night to be recapping. To recap, Real Housewives of Miami premiere. Next week, we will be in Los Angeles on June 19th at the Fonda Theater to recap this show right here, the Valley. And it's just our luck that we will be recapping The Return of Jax. Oh, God, you're right. So it will be nice to be in an audience full of people hating on Jax together. So if you guys want to just come scream at what a shit face Jax is, join us. Okay.

4:18Ronnie Karam: Also, this is a recap video. You can find all of our recaps over on Patreon. Crappin's on demand, we call it. Also, we're recapping Love Island three or four times a week. So go join our Patreon for that good stuff. Just did a really fun one today. You know what? We do them all the time now. So that's that. And I think that's it. Right, Ben? Do I need to announce anything else?

4:40Ben Mandelker: I think that's really it. Yeah.

4:42Ronnie Karam: That's it, y 'all. Okay, here we go. Season 2, Episode 9. When one door forecloses. Another one forecloses. This is the cast of Vanderpump Rules.

4:54Ben Mandelker: Yeah, when one door forecloses, that means you have no more doors. There are no more doors. It's repossessed. The door is now at Chase Bank.

5:05Ronnie Karam: I'm alright.

5:06Ben Mandelker: Sorry, the theme song. Terrible theme song.

5:09Ronnie Karam: Because we're alright.

5:15Ronnie Karam: because we're all right none of you are all right you know we said at the first episode when we heard this song way back in the day in 2024 we said no none of you are all right and it just becomes more and more true every day um jasmine and zach almost die trying to

5:32Ben Mandelker: be wacky doing a rollerblading scene um so they're not all right they're not all right at all and And then we see Brittany and Gina and Michelle and Jared and they're at a salon and they're getting their hair done. And Brit is saying that she's like she's saying that Jax is getting out of rehab on the 21st. And Janet's like, well, I hope Jax is better in some ways so that Cruz has a good relationship with a better man. I'm like, yeah, that's not that's something that's never going to happen. Sorry, Janet.

6:12what she's so annoying and then jared's sitting there behind them and clutching his little louis

6:16Ronnie Karam: vuitton purse i can't with these people so britney's like well he did me right now let me tell you that okay you know he should have been dead to me when he wouldn't give me that noise okay but i'm looking around the house see if i can find my wedding ring i don't know where it is and janet's like have you checked his ebay page recently meanwhile janet's bought all this shit on ebay you know janet has like a little closet in the back of that house with all of the shit that Jax has been selling of Brittany's. Underpriced. She's got a fan account. And Brittany's like, hey, we're selling my Jenny Craig bags, yo.

6:47Ronnie Karam: Okay. Is that what she said?

6:50Ben Mandelker: Jenny Craig bags? I thought she had said Jimmy something. It was like, it wasn't quite Jimmy Choo, but it was like Jimmy, like Jimmy Crab. Like, this is really cool. Kentucky designer named Jimmy Crab. Hey, those great bags. You can put so much beer cheese in them. I sold them. My Jimmy Crab bags.

7:07Ronnie Karam: bags but what is she saying because our um our gorgeous note taker shelby wrote jenny craig and then she left us a link and there is an ebay page that sells jenny craig bags but they're only ten dollars and it says jenny craig believe large blue grocery insulated cooper zipper delivery you

7:25Ben Mandelker: know what i a hundred percent believe that jacks would sell these i think that jack crackhead ass selling jenny craig bags on ebay they're just tote bags these are just tote bags they're actually they look like they're actually pretty nice tote bags and they're just like these they're just jenny craig tote bags and i guarantee jacks is like well whatever i don't like looking at them i'm just gonna sell them and i know it'll make um britney mad because she really likes her

7:50Ronnie Karam: jenny craig tote bags well do you think they were full of the jenny craig food that britney's supposed to be doing because isn't she like a jenny craig spokesperson or something i forget i thought it was nutrisystem but i thought it was nutrisystem too it's hard i don't know what to say I'm hung up now on this because now I want them to be Jenny Craig bags so bad. I just love that Brittany would have a collection of Jenny Craig bags.

8:12Ben Mandelker: And Brittany goes, for like$30, I'm not kidding. So at first I thought she meant like, wow, he was vastly undervaluing her like Jimmy, Jimmy Crab bags that are worth something. And then I was like, why is she not more mad?

8:25Ronnie Karam: We are the worst gays in the whole world.

8:29Ben Mandelker: but if they are jenny craig tote bags that are worth like five dollars and if he's selling them for thirty dollars now i understand why they were all laughing because it's just like so sad and pathetic of jacks and also so typically jacks that is just so typically jacks oh baby baby because he would try to make a huge profit off of like a shitty tote yeah because you know

8:52Ronnie Karam: what it's typical of a fucking crackhead that's what they do yeah on the fucking tv right off the wall. That's what they'll do. Where's my fork? I got a plastic fork with my Uber Eats. Where did it go? Like, I sold it. Sorry, I snorted it. It's like, goddammit, cousin. So, sorry, a little personal experience there. So, then we go to Kristen and Luke's house. I'm so proud of Kristen. You know what? Kristen has really gone back to her roots. She's actually living in an apartment like they would have lived in on Vanderpump Rules. And it just made me happy. I was like, yes, finally, another run-down shitty apartment with clothes all over the floor and you know it smells like beer rot

9:31Ben Mandelker: good for you girl also so impressed you know she she was trying to get pregnant for so long so many months and years that i'm so glad that now that she's in her third trimester that she has been able to be in this third trimester for at least i think two and a half years like i am so impressed like she's like you know what it took me a long time to get here so we're gonna stay here for a long time because I can swear Kristen has been about to give birth for like since January right am I wrong she has been so pregnant for so long she just did another photo shoot where she's like here I am pregnancy photo shoot I was like really she's been pregnant for a long long time she is making up for for all the time she's spent not pregnant trying right yeah she's been pregnant

10:15Ronnie Karam: for a while and um happily pregnant you know I'm so proud of her eggs I thought that's what you

10:20Ben Mandelker: were going to say like i'm so proud of her like well i'm proud of her eggs too but i just think it's so funny i feel like i was like damn like chris every time chris and dodie post something on instagram i'm like it finally happened she had her baby as i was like did another pregnancy photo shoot i'm just uh three days away and it's like two and a half days away one day away i'm like this has been pregnant a long time oh don't worry she'll be one of those people to post every

10:45Ronnie Karam: day after being like, it's been two days since I had to be. Like those people who get married and then they keep posting their wedding pictures over and over. They're like, you guys, it's been a rough two weeks because it's been such a letdown coming off of my wedding. God, I love that wedding. I look so good in this wedding. I've gained 20 pounds since then. It's been two weeks, but it's been a rough two weeks. And then like a couple months later, I've gained 27 pounds now since my wedding, guys. Still happy. That's happiness. Wait, right? And it's like 10 years later, I've gained 500 pounds.

11:15Ronnie Karam: Like, girl, why are you still posting the same picture?

11:18Ben Mandelker: You know, you know, Kristen is going to go hard in the paint for some little plastic letters on a board that says one week, three weeks, 17 weeks, every single week. There'll be another picture of the baby with a little board next to it. And Jill's going to be there on the side being like, you know, I never got this special board when I was a puppy. Woof, woof. Michelle's basically going to turn into like the Michelle Michelle Lolly of

11:45Ronnie Karam: Why is nobody giving me a doggy board? I have been here 70 ,000 weeks

11:52Ben Mandelker: I have to eat roses that made me have diarrhea last season

11:59Ronnie Karam: I have been completely gut off from the sex life of my barons somebody yelled me so we go to this sorry it's a shitty little apartment so we go over there and then we see Zach coming to the house and he's like what up bitches it's me Zach yeah fun guy I didn't even have breaks on my rollerblades yeah

12:21Ben Mandelker: I did it I survived I rollerbladed on Chandler Boulevard and did not get run over two weeks since I survived rollerblading Zach got a little bored

12:36man just like disgusting take that off your social media so they are gonna they're hosting

12:42Ben Mandelker: like a uh a housewarming because they're actually they're in a house it may look like an apartment but they're in a house because they have a house in noho and because it's on the rundown schedule they have to have a housewarming but they're not really ready for it so they still have boxes and

12:55Ronnie Karam: you know steven of course she's gonna throw a damn housewarming party with clothes on the floor there's clothes on the floor kristin there's like open milk on the countertop like girl put some stuff away throw into a closet like a normal person but it's kristin so she doesn't she's like oh yeah we're gonna sort stuff but like it's good we're having a moving compartment and luke's like yeah i might as well ignore some of the mess and enjoy the house and then we see the piles of crap everywhere yeah so then luke's talking to jesse over by

13:27Ben Mandelker: the grill as people come over and is asking um if there's any jesse if there's anything new on the michelle front and jesse's like yeah no i haven't talked to her or whatever and and and luke assures him that michelle's not coming tonight so jesse's happy about that and then meanwhile um zach's there so jenna we we have a jenna gets a moment jenna has been trying to have a moment for years in the vanderpump rules universe you know she you know i've been reading

13:53Ronnie Karam: that she's popped up a million times i don't remember no jenna tell me about what she like

13:58Ben Mandelker: what are her interests she's been around don't you don't you remember my famous story about how i saw kristin jenna and katie at la fitness once and tay diggs was there and was talking to them and how like jenna was like trying to be like in the mix she was like really flinging her hair

14:14Ronnie Karam: to digs she's like i've been on television for like 10 years so i get it she's like i'm friends

14:19Ben Mandelker: I'm friends with Kristen Doty. This was probably like 2016 or something.

14:23Ronnie Karam: Hey, I've always been Team Glinda anyway. You made the right choice.

14:29Ben Mandelker: But Jenna has been popping up. And the fact that you don't remember who Jenna is is exactly the struggle that Jenna deals with. Is that she has been trying to make something happen. So she gets some good traction here. Because, well, Zach for says, Jenna and I have been like friends since I moved to LA. And, you know, we've had so much fun. and like of course i met her through sheena because sheena's like kevin bacon okay it's always one degree of sheena shea and then the chiron below sheena says sheena goes from kristin's

14:59Ronnie Karam: friend to everybody's friend it's she she bacon so then we go to luke jesse and danny talking about a spa day that danny had and jesse's like well you went to the spa what did you get like botox bro And he's like, so, guys, get this. Wasn't Botox. Hold on for a minute. It was Scrotox. All right? Everybody get that? Scrotox. Do we understand? Three under three. Balls in my stomach. That's what it is. Now, the way he describes Scrotox, so apparently Scrotox is, Zach explains it. And he's like, oh, my God, Scrotox, you know, like when your balls, he's like, you know when your balls droop and they look bigger like balls get bigger and balls get smaller this way they just stay bigger is that what scrotox is i didn't know that i don't was i thought scrotox like made your big balls smaller i never really understood scrotox to me it seemed like something

16:01Ben Mandelker: that someone invented and like sort of they created a marketing angle to it that okay what You want to hear? Yes.

16:11Ronnie Karam: Okay, here's what Scrotox does. They put botulism into your scrotum, okay, first of all, which killed a lot of nuns in nonsense. I don't know if anybody's seen that. It's very dangerous. So it reduces wrinkles and creases. Who wants an unwrinkled nut sack? That would look crazy. It's like ironing linen. Some things just shouldn't be ironed. Okay. Yeah, I was just about to say, it's like linen. enhance scrotal aesthetics by relaxing the muscles scrotox can make the scrotum appear tighter more youthful and potentially larger decrease sweating well that's never bad things except you'll be sweating out your butthole because that sweat's going to go somewhere your elbows your butthole between your toes who knows improve comfort by relaxing the muscles and reducing sweating scrotox can alleviate the discomfort and irritation in the scrotal area so do you have any discomfort

17:08Ben Mandelker: in your scrotal area no i think this is bullshit because i think like the body the body does things because the body is we've evolved that way and i think that like balls go up and down depending on if it's hot or cold and i think it's like i think if my balls are cold i think i want them to come up to the mothership. You know? Yeah, you don't want them just dangling down there and getting freezing.

17:32Ronnie Karam: It's like refusing to put a sweater on your child. Like, why would you do that?

17:36Ben Mandelker: Yeah. I also feel like I don't want to increase the risk that I might, like, twist my legs in a certain way and, like, my poor dangling balls are going to get caught in the madness there. Like, I think let the balls go up and down. Also, it's cool to have a ball elevator, I think. Like, what a fun thing that we have. Like, why would we just, like, have something dangling? You know?

17:55Ronnie Karam: Yeah, at least some parts of my body are lifting something. It's like, ooh, do it.

18:01Ben Mandelker: Yeah, exactly.

18:03Ronnie Karam: I don't know. I've just never heard of a guy who wants big dangly balls on purpose.

18:07Ben Mandelker: I think that if you are really concerned about the aesthetic of your balls, chances are you probably don't have a big dick because you're trying to supplement it. Or I should say you're insecure about it because who cares if you have a big dick or not? I mean, obviously we like big dicks, but just because someone has a small dick doesn't mean that they're any less worthy. But I think that someone who's insecure about their dick is like, well, I got to like, I'm not doing, I'm not really like, I'm not doing my 11 o 'clock number with my dick. So I got to like supplement that with some nice smooth dangling balls.

18:37Ben Mandelker: Like, yeah.

18:38Ronnie Karam: Well, and also, well, maybe people have, you know, like when people do, what is that called when you like Jack stuff, not Coke, but the other thing he does, roids. So like when you know, roid balls are like really tight, little, like they go away. You're like, where'd the nuts go? So maybe guys like that need that.

18:55Ben Mandelker: Yeah, maybe that's what it is. I don't know.

18:58Ronnie Karam: Well, I haven't thought about balls this much in a long time. So thanks, Joe. I've been educated. Thanks, Joe. Thanks, Joe. So then we go to talking about scrotox, which we're done now. So then Danny, everyone's like, I'm not going to do that. But Zach, we see getting his scrotox injections, which I think is hilarious. I think it's so funny that Zach's like, you know what I'm doing? Scrotox. Need to do it.

19:25Ben Mandelker: Upkeep the balls for Banjay. Banjay. You know, I really enjoy Zach so much. I feel like Zach lives in this sort of strange, like, this strange gay place where there's, because there's all these other gays that circulate around the show, but they are like the, they're kind of like, it was like Jared, and we haven't seen Simon this year, but there's Simon and there's others, and they usually just sort of sit there to kind of be like, yes, girl, yes, yes. And it's not like, and Zach definitely does that, but it's kind of funny that like Zach is like not part of their crew and he's like not really part of the straight people's crew.

20:00Ben Mandelker: He's just on his own gay Island. And I love that for him. I think it's great. I think it's so fun to watch. Yeah.

20:08Ronnie Karam: So, um, the producer's like, okay, so, you know, the reason people get scrotox is because your balls drop when you get older. And Zach's like, they do. And he's like, yeah. So that's what happens. And so if they're going to end up on the floor anyway, why are you rushing it? And Zach's like, um, I guess I just wanted to see what it was like to have old balls. I don't know.

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23:26Ben Mandelker: So, anyway, they talk about Scro Talks a lot. So Jason and Janet show up, and it's uncomfortable because, you know, they had their fight with Jasmine last week. Oh, my God, Janet is so uncomfortable. she's really uncomfortable she's like really uncomfortable right now guys she's uncomfortable and Jasmine you know who else is uncomfortable Jasmine's uncomfortable and Janet sees that Kristen's talking to Nia and Janet and she's like I'm gonna wait because I'm uncomfortable so Nia's like oh my god

23:58Ronnie Karam: they're here I guess I'll get myself a bottle of wine she's stirring everything so Danny's like at this point Jason and I are pretty cool you know even though we had some problems but i've got some definite frustration with janet trying to attack me and my character i'm gonna put my hand on her butt gently and explain girl you need to be nicer to daddy so then jasmine's talking to luke and she's like how are

24:28Ben Mandelker: you and luke's like i'm good and he's like how are you doing you know at the beach he's like i've never seen jason worked up like that before and she's like well he's hurt because shit was said years ago but like i didn't bring it up and i don't care we don't believe it like i would never hurt him like that unless the cameras were running and we you know i needed to have a scene for the first time in a season and a half so sure maybe a little bit jasmine's so funny how she changes

24:50Ronnie Karam: she like goes for your throat one second and is like oh really really because i didn't even say it talk to your boys because they're the ones who said it and everyone hates you janet whatever she was saying and then the next day she's like i love her i don't even know what's going on like i don't even know what the problem is. I absolutely love them.

25:07Ben Mandelker: The only thing I love more than Janet are her casseroles.

25:14Ronnie Karam: So they're like, are you going to talk to Jason? She's like, yeah. So she wants to get over it. So then she goes up to Jason and Janet who are talking to the Thirsties, Sheena and Brock. And she's like, hey, hey, hey, you know what, Janet? Janet, I just have one thing to say, if it's possible. I would love to have a conversation with you and your husband and me and Melissa, because then it's four people okay then it's four people and not just three people because i like i call that conversations better when they're four people and janet's like great i love that four

25:43Ben Mandelker: is my favorite number at dave and busters i play every game four times and if i do not hit it big i move on so let's do that she's okay great one step at a time great okay great great points there there are everything's gonna be good so now sheena is um telling danny and nia i got salmon sperm but on my face

26:03Ronnie Karam: and procedure no i just like really made a salmon horny like you heard about my music videos so because i'm good as row because i'm good as row oh well might as well use it waste not want not

26:21Ben Mandelker: she's huge in salmon circles um and then jenna jenna's like oh god it's my moment it's my moment

26:28Ronnie Karam: it's my moment it's making like tons of money

26:30Ben Mandelker: in like only salmon you know getting more clicks than anybody on that side the salmon splooging all over us ironically their logo is blue um you would have thought they would have just

26:45Ronnie Karam: gone pink so jenna is sorry about interrupting you i just needed to talk more about salmon

26:50Ben Mandelker: splooging on sheena's face you can interrupt me as much as you want honey especially for for salmon's blue jean's face that salmon was swimming upstream um so jenna here it comes she's like hey zach do you want to hear something wild yes i dated aaron michelle's current boyfriend a year and a half ago isn't that wild ronnie i don't know maybe i'm crazy this is the fucking wildest thing i've heard in 2025. It's wild. Why are all these people fucking each other?

27:31Ronnie Karam: How was Aaron even in this group then? Was he in the group because of Michelle and then Jenna jumped on him?

27:38Ben Mandelker: What's with this? All these people, they all just are in that milieu. They all went to Cabo Canteen back in the day together in Saddle Ranch. They all do Runyon Cannon and they probably play pickleball. They all go to the same parties. It's just the way it is.

27:53Ronnie Karam: Aaron, I thought, was brought in by Michelle. So was Aaron already part of this group where Jenna could get to him?

27:58Ben Mandelker: I'm saying I think he was part of a larger sort of like douchebag circle in like Hollywood, West Hollywood. You see the same people at all the clubs. They just exist.

28:08Ronnie Karam: Yeah. Okay. I don't know. It seems fishy. I'm calling fishy.

28:16Ronnie Karam: She's my biggest fan. So she dated Aaron a year and a half ago and Zach's like, are you serious? else she's like yeah it's just like such a small world i mean god how many guys with bug eyes are

28:29Ben Mandelker: getting ass in the city well i you know she was talking about going on to only salmons but i actually go on to only honey and he was there and i kind of like i know we took our friend relationship

28:41Ronnie Karam: to something more intimate i mean it is a harder cleanup but worth it at the end of the day

28:47Ben Mandelker: he's a sweet guy um so zach is like did you like him she's like yeah i did hey should i tell jesse i mean she's so clunky with her like attempt to get on the show she's like well sheena got back on lala's getting back on everything's turning up jenna he's like oh my god you're totally shot

29:11Ronnie Karam: So she goes over And well he does he's like oh my god Jatai Jatai has a story for you And I think you're gonna wanna hear it So he's like oh my god Alright go ahead

29:24Ben Mandelker: Here's my story Are you ready it has a really great arc to it It has a beginning middle and end three act structure I dated Aaron And Who's Aaron?

29:34Ronnie Karam: Michelle's boyfriend Oh that guy so okay when was that Hold on let me get out my little notebook I've been learning math. All right, go ahead. Okay, so we did it twice.

29:44Ben Mandelker: So like the first time was like,

29:46Ronnie Karam: like five years ago.

29:47Ben Mandelker: And here's a photo from 2019.

29:49Ronnie Karam: Twice, five years ago is 10 years ago. Okay, go ahead.

29:54Ben Mandelker: And then like, God, I think like a year and a half ago, like briefly. So yeah, it's a pretty compelling story. I have already applied to the Moth to be able to tell this on stage because I think it just has like a lot of cadences to it. And I just, I want people to really hear my journey

30:09Ronnie Karam: with with aaron so you've dated this guy for eight and a half years which means michelle michelle was cheating on me the entire time we were married oh my god i'm gonna say moth i'm looking for a moth to sploot on my face it's like called a collab you guys don't judge me

30:29Ben Mandelker: yeah wow guys i'm just gonna take a moment here because i just found out michelle was cheating on me before she even met me. So it's pretty wild.

30:39Ronnie Karam: And Jesse's like, yeah, that's interesting. Cause I heard that like a year and a half ago, Michelle and him were together. No, you, you heard from, you heard from Kristen that she was fucking around on you a year and a half or two years ago. She never said it was with Aaron. You're trying to make the Aaron thing happen. It probably was Aaron though. So it probably was.

30:57Ben Mandelker: I mean, she did say she kissed someone, but you know what? I'm just going to support Michelle on this one. I say cheat on Jesse.

31:05Ronnie Karam: Kristen has said in, I don't know, interviews, whatever, that she wasn't talking about that guy. She was talking about a different guy, which means Michelle was like cheating multiple times. So I don't know.

31:20Ben Mandelker: I say the more the merrier when it comes to Jesse Lolly. I'm totally in favor of infidelity against Jesse Lolly. Yeah, I'm with you. This guy's such a piece of shit.

31:28Ronnie Karam: And so Jesse's like, yeah, I'm just trying to figure it out. And Jenna's like, I'm sorry. Do you want to have an affair? We could do it. I mean, that would get us pretty close to being on TV. Wouldn't that be great? Being on TV? He's like, I am on TV. Right. Okay. So, you know, I'll be here. I'm here when you're ready. Just call me. Any of your friends know me? I've been on television 10 years.

31:49Ben Mandelker: Do you want to hear a great story? I once flirted with Taye Diggs at an LA fitness. Yeah. So, anyway. Great talking.

31:59Ronnie Karam: It's funny because Katie called him Taye Scram after that. Because, like, he got out of there really fast. It was hilarious. It was really funny. So Jesse's like, well, six months ago, Super Bowl Sunday, Luke comes up and says, I heard Michelle was seeing a guy. Well, you guys. Luke is the messiest ass person on this. He is messy. By the way. He is the messiest one. And he gets away with it all because he's just like a innocent looking little ginger who doesn't shave his nuts. And everybody is like, oh, look at Luke. He's the best guy. Luke is fucking all of you over. and I love him for you.

32:34Ben Mandelker: You're doing great, Luke. He's doing great work. I know Kristen was really upset that we all compare Luke to Van Gogh but guess what? He is Van Gogh because Van Gogh is messy too. Van Gogh is like impressionist messy and Luke is just 20-25 messy and they're the same person except Luke still has all his ears. Luke is impressionable

32:53Ronnie Karam: messy.

32:55Ben Mandelker: Yeah, so you know what? I don't want to hear any guff that he's not like Van Gogh because he's 100 % like van Gogh yeah he looks like it and he acts like it so he's like yeah while we were married

33:07Ronnie Karam: she was cheating and she couldn't get a hold of him and then she stopped by his house and caught him with another girl is jenna the girl was he cheating on my wife who was cheating on me

33:19Ben Mandelker: don't you think jenna would have added that to the story like her story was gonna take anything

33:25Ronnie Karam: she can get to lend her story credence, sir.

33:28Ben Mandelker: Yeah. Jenna, all Jenna has is I dated Aaron. I guarantee she would have added some sauce if she could have. She would have a hundred. And by the way, she's right there. Why don't you just ask her? Did you, were you like, did Michelle walk in on you having sex with Aaron once? Like it's all right there. She did not. I'm going to say there's nothing more to this. She dated Aaron. She got some free honey. End of story.

33:51Ronnie Karam: Yeah, Jenna, this is kind of lame, really. I mean, unless you're going to go up to Michelle and be like, hey, Michelle, did you still you stole Aaron from me? I had a first. OK, there is a fight or Jesse. I was cheating with Michelle at the same time you were day or something. But just this like, oh, my God, guess what? I dated Aaron. Who cares? That has nothing. Anything.

34:13Ben Mandelker: I guarantee she was expecting Michelle to be there. And so it's going to be a moment where she's like, you know what? I did it, Aaron. And then seeing if Michelle would have a rise out of it and then it could be an issue. and then she was hoping Michelle would be like, get this girl out of my face. But Michelle wasn't there and so she came in for her big moment and she had this story and she's like, what am I supposed to do? Well, I guess I'll tell Jesse. It's not going to really have the same land in the same way. So it was a big flop moment for Jenna. Yeah, it was a sad one.

34:39Ronnie Karam: And she goes, oh yeah, when I saw you, I was like, oh my God, this is full circle. Really? You haven't seen Jesse, Lolly, in all this time, Michelle? You're always, or Jenna, you're always around. I don't believe you. She goes, yeah, I was like, what are the odds? And Jesse's like, yeah, it's a small world. Okay, can I get back to my kebabs? Because you're extremely boring. Even giving me ammunition against my wife, you're extremely boring.

35:01Ben Mandelker: I know. I would rather deal with a kebab than Jenna. So now Luke is going to talk to Danny about the trip. Because they're going to be going on a cash trip to Hawaii, and he's going to propose there. And Luke says, he's like, you know, Kristen is very good at uncovering the truth. you know so I've got to be really careful because we just need to keep Detective Dodie off the case I'm like yes well you know Kristen isn't always so great about discovering the truth I think that's what got her fired the first time around so well listen she's had some

35:34Ronnie Karam: misfires that's for sure I would

35:38Ben Mandelker: I would not she's no Sherlock Holmes okay she's not even Elsbeth wait a minute Luke I heard that Faith is proposing

35:48Ronnie Karam: to me in Hawaii

35:52Ben Mandelker: and she stole a jacket and the stolen jacket she stole my wedding dress dress yeah um so then um then danny and nia are leaving to go the baby and everything and britney's like hi guys everyone gather round gather round okay gotta tell you got something okay so last night jacks came home from the came home to get his mail which by the way what what rehab does jacks get to come home to

36:18Ronnie Karam: get mail what is that about i don't know i don't understand this whole i don't understand this whole fucking rehab thing and why do why do you even need your mail and rehab you're not paying your mortgage what mail are you getting you're not paying your bills he was coming there to uncover the cameras which is what he did he came and uncovered the cameras and then so you know me and my mama were covering back up you know how that goes you know take the cameras out britney take the cameras out of the house yeah take them out so so anyway so let's talk to the journey and um so they asked the actual therapist who like goes around places with them because he's got like a therapist he's like a photographer but a therapist okay and she said that he made the girl the girl who answers the phone cry because he told her that if anybody calls to lie and act like he was on his way to urgent care and she was sobbing and crying because he made her feel like she needed to tell people that and so the therapist had told all of us the truth that He never went to them and them their hospital.

37:17Ronnie Karam: Girl, of course that whole thing was a lie. Of fucking course it was. It's Jax. Anybody who believes one single thing coming out of Jax's mouth, I swear to God. So Janice is like, oh my God, he manipulated the front desk person to say he was having a medical emergency. This is why I have his poster in my bedroom. That guy is fucking amazing.

37:37Ben Mandelker: He's working on levels I didn't even think were possible. I mean, receptionist manipulation. That's genius. That's Kaiser Soze shit.

37:45Ronnie Karam: so britney knows that this guy is putting out this like pr story to everybody else but he's really just still being a monster and then he wrote me this really long email and he told me that the house is in foreclosure can you believe that i looked that one up and first of all i put for the number four clothes led to a website it was a sad one but that means people are gonna

38:08Ben Mandelker: sell my house y 'all and and so she's like this is really so fucked up because she's saying this could ruin her chance of ever buying another home and it's true so jason's like yeah i mean that'd be terrible it's just yeah i mean because my name is on as much as he is and you know i would lose i've lost all that money i put down you know and like and janet's like does he not realize that he's damaging cruise oh my goodness yeah that's what i said okay and i said it right in front of cruise too but he also said we're splitting the podcast 50 50 i'll do one week you do the next and jason's like this is so disappointing because after what he was saying two days ago he said he's gonna give you all the money i can't believe it anyway still team jacks yeah team jacks he's trying

38:50Ronnie Karam: guys so they'll like get a lawyer britney and she's like you know what after tonight i'm ready to fight i'm ready to fight okay so then we see michelle going to lala's new house we haven't seen Lala's new house in the valve. She's like, hi.

39:06Ben Mandelker: But haven't we?

39:08Ronnie Karam: Have we?

39:10Ben Mandelker: Well, we haven't seen it, but haven't we? Let's see. Shiplap, modern farmhouse, open the door, living room to the right, dining room to the left, walk down the staircase, kitchen to the left, TV area to the right, the exact same layout, the exact same house.

39:27Ronnie Karam: Little boxes on the hillside, little boxes full of tinky-talky little boxes on the hillside and they all look just the same.

39:38Ben Mandelker: I did appreciate Lala's room and board sofa. That's a cute one. So, anyway. Her what?

39:46Ronnie Karam: Room and board sofa. Oh, her room and board. Oh, that's some fancy shit. Remember I was looking for stuff and you go, oh my god, you should go to room and board. So I go to room and board and I texted you like, are you fucking crazy? They're like, do you like this chair? It's$19 million. Enjoy it.

40:01Ben Mandelker: Yeah, but compared to like restoration hardware, I remember looking at sofas and restoration hardware. I was like, my dream was all I wanted was a sectional. I've always wanted a big sectional. And so I went to restoration hardware and their sectionals were like, you know, three inches from the ground. And they're like tiny and like that will be$30 ,000. It was like not even a joke. It was literally$30 ,000 for a sofa at restoration hardware. I was like, you're out of your mind store. yeah that's a lot that's crazy that's crazy money so lala's like welcome how's it going

40:38Ronnie Karam: it is very difficult because jesse's you know my daughter is asking why jesse's house is bigger and i say appreciate what you have you live in a bedroom built of honeycomb be grateful

40:53Ben Mandelker: she is part of the hive oh my god she likes beyonce already no she is part of a beehive now

41:03Ronnie Karam: So Lala's like, yeah, you know, I know what it's like, because my daughter, like when she's hanging out with Rance, she'll go to like Target, like when she comes back to me and put everything in the carts. And I'm like, no, honey, that's only what you do with daddies.

41:19Ben Mandelker: Does Jesse, does Jesse like, do you see similarities in the same patterns as your ex, like with Jesse? Yes. Yes, I do. because I didn't realize how sometimes he was so disrespectful to people I always had to like brush it off and Lala's like yeah you become desensitized after like the 30th like news article about how terrible your husband is but I mean my ex was like not kind to people but he did put me in a movie called Gotti so I always thought he was insecure but no turns out he's an asshole

41:49Ronnie Karam: yeah like he was an asshole but I do know Al Pacino's now so it worked out so she um she says that she always thought rand was just insecure and she's like no he's just an asshole i realized once i wasn't living in the mansion anymore that he's he's just an asshole i was like okay i like that we can relabel the men after you know the gravy train stops so we all knew he was an asshole lala and so did you it was worth it at the time whatever I can't cry about Rand or well, Jesse more because I don't know. Okay. So let's go to this Michelle and Jesse thing. Well, first we talk about Michelle.

42:28Ben Mandelker: Go ahead. Yeah. I was going to say, it's actually not so much about Jesse anymore. And now Michelle, we find out that her mom has cancer and it's spread. It's really sad. She doesn't know how much time is left. This really broke my heart for her because I know, I know, you know, Michelle might not be the most charismatic person there is. and some people say she's basically a robot and we make her sound like a robot. Well, she does talk like one. So, you know, I know she receives a lot of shit, but this is hard. And my heart really does go out for her because she's trying to deal with this narcissist and she's dealing with a mother who is ailing and that sucks.

43:07Ben Mandelker: I felt really bad for her when she talked about this.

43:10Ronnie Karam: Yeah, so she talks about that and they hug. Commercials, here comes one right now. He lurks in shadow. He slips into dreams. He casts no reflection.

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46:24Ronnie Karam: So let's go to El Compadre. So now it's time for the Jasmine, Melissa, Janet, and Jason sit down. And Janet's walking in and like, I don't know, pajamas from the 1920s. I'm not sure what she's really wearing. So she walks in and she's like, oh my god i hope this is peaceful because the last one was not peaceful well janet sit your

46:44Ben Mandelker: ass down they've got mariachis here i know jasmine definitely pulled a power move by making them leave the valley and come to hollywood also um now that you say janet wearing pajamas from the 1920s it made me realize i could totally see janet as one of those cigarette girls in the nightclub in the 20s just walking around with a tray strapped to her shoulders so jason's like this is like weird i feel like two weeks ago like this would have been a super fun you know restaurant trip and like not 100 sure what happened to be honest but like we're just like pretty confused about stuff and i just wanted to find out like when we first learned about stuff it was at britney's pool party and kristen came over and said jasmine said you take your ring off and when you go out or something like that and when i first heard i thought well i was so left to field i was just like laughing but then i was like wait why why would jasmine say this why would kristen go at go like why would you tell kristen who we're not not a good place with at all like what's going on

47:33Ronnie Karam: here i'm so confused this is so ridiculous so he's like oh my god jasmine basically like what the fuck jasmine they're like we would expect this from kristin but not from you um so a couple of quotes from that episode um kristin saying uh one from kristin's confessional she said i heard this rumor from zach it was then confirmed from jasmine the second quote was luke who told janet and jason about the rumor and he said i heard the rumor a year ago so jasmine heard that you take your ring off sometimes at bars oh this is so ridiculous so it's so jasmine's like yeah so jasmine's like i mean i never i never told kristin so i don't even know where this is going and he's like but you said that you told kristin at the party she's like no i didn't and then we see a clip of her

48:18Ben Mandelker: going of them saying so kristin told her she goes yes so kristin told me about this yes so she's she Jasmine and Melissa are denying that they ever had any conversation about the ring or anything like that. And Janet's like, but she came up to us and said, Jasmine said this and then we're okay. And she's like, well, we never said any of it. It's like, yeah, but she did try to blame you. And Melissa's like, at the end of the day, you get margaritas for margaritas. And this conversation is not focused on like what he said. That's we're not here to we're just here to squash things with you guys, because I promise we wherever the rumors are from, it was not us who originated.

48:54Ronnie Karam: it up okay but here's the thing because i just bungled this last section because there's so much bullshit in this scene jasmine in the last scene said okay i said it but i didn't start it and they're like did you say it to kristin and she's like well i mean i told her that i'd heard it but now she's saying i never said anything to kristin like you we have the clip jasmine like what the hell just tell jack why don't you just tell jasmine she or janet that she's an asshole Just do that. Just say it's a rumor that your ring was off. That's it. It wasn't meant to be a horrible thing against you guys.

49:26Ronnie Karam: It should never have come out. Kristen was being an asshole. I'm sorry it came out. But yes, I'm guilty of gossiping just like everybody else. But now it becomes this, well, Kristen's just a liar. And Kristen's making everything up. And Janet thinks she solves some big mystery by saying, oh, now we know who the real mastermind is. It's Kristen. We already knew Kristen brought this up to get back at you for being an asshole to her friend. She said it on TV and to you. It's not a big mystery that you solved Angela Lansbury. Get off your bike.

49:57Ben Mandelker: Yeah, it's really not. So Jasmine's like, look, I don't really think that you're a Karen. And Janet's like, well, you know, it's funny because I looked up a definition of a Karen and it says, it was like entitled something. And I was like, well, yeah, I guess I am guilty of that. I am kind of a Karen.

50:11Ronnie Karam: Janet had to look up the definition of Karen in 2025, girl. Like no one's ever called you a Karen before. I don't believe it.

50:20Ben Mandelker: Yeah. So they just sort of like bury the hatchet. Like, there's just how I felt in that moment was that you were a Karen, but I don't believe you are a Karen. I just felt in that moment you were a Karen. And Janet's like, if I had even realized that you felt ganged up on, even though you did say, please it's two against one. This isn't fair. I never, I would have just stepped away. I never would have done that. I'm like, yeah, it's pretty obvious that she, she said to you like a million times, but out. and still stayed there.

50:47Ronnie Karam: And Melissa's like, well, I'm just happy we're doing this because, you know, we're all kind of learning that something has happened to make us all think we're against each other. What could that be? And Janet's like, well, you know, I think the real mastermind is Kristen. Like, no shit, Janet. So they all hug and now they decide to all be friends. But then Jasmine tells us at the end of the scene, she's like, yeah, I want to be good with Janet it because she's scary and she'll fuck you up so i made up with her so now uh we know we're about

51:21Ben Mandelker: to learn some more shit about jacks because we get a jack's video message and the way the show works is they give us a video of jacks being all nice and kind and then they uh as soon as that's done they give us a scene where we find out even more bullshit that he's up to so he's like this

51:37Ronnie Karam: We got the mariachi band over to the table being like

51:44Ben Mandelker: You guys I'm pretty excited to walk out the door I mean I have anxiety I'm anxious, I'm scared But you know what, it's time And I know I have a lot of apologizing to do I hope they can see that You know what, I hope they can see Hey, Jax, he's making progress He's taking steps, he's trying Get that fucking camera in my face You're a receptionist Anyway, so, you know, I'm just excited. I'm a new man. I'm a nice guy now. I'm treated, and I think everything's fixed.

52:13Ronnie Karam: Yeah, Jax, that's why you're there, so everybody can see that you're trying. We know. We know you're game by now, buddy. So now let's go to Brittany at the foreclosure house. Doorbells ringing. Oh, my God, there's McDonald's, Taco Bell, and Domino's. So there's a lot of fast food. That looks like a depression dump to me. I've been there, girl. So Zach and Kristen show up And she's like oh my god we're having to cater My fast food Because Jax is coming by home tomorrow So we're going to pack up all his shit And get it out of here He's got his new little condo now I just need him to be gone And so Michelle walks in and sees the fast food

52:52Ben Mandelker: And is like disgusted She's like Brittany and I certainly have different Taste buds She loves fast food And I do not like it Now listen Michelle I was just standing up for you okay don't make me regret the words i used okay because i am a fast food girly as well so please

53:09Ronnie Karam: please just settle down over there yeah michelle you need all the positive publicity you can get and this is not the way to get it yeah come on you're talking to people who watch the valley

53:23Ben Mandelker: so zach is like so since he does get out on thursday and today's tuesday how about on wednesday we take you out for one last night before he's out of rehab and let's just go to jack's before just like one night though let's just go there and but hold on also let me say friday saturday sunday and monday just so i get all of the days in there so he's like i had this idea literally for months now to change the name of jack's bar to brit's yeah and then we want britney to like know that we like we support her and we love her and we're in this together um so michelle's like

54:00Ronnie Karam: how do you feel about zine jack oh my god he's gonna break me because like you guys know i really love him i mean he's a supreme crunch taco you know you can try and say no to him but eventually they're gonna be on your doorstep anyway but you know um i still love him and he can trick me into going there but i need to be strong i need to be strong okay i'm gonna be strong we support you don't worry so michelle is there and she's looking sad she's like i wish i was

54:30Ben Mandelker: getting the same support that britney is getting now i mean i am an amazing friend i will drop anything and everything if one of my friends needs help or they need something i am ride or die and so i don't feel that in return yeah she's kind of got the lala disease where she's like

54:51Ronnie Karam: wait a minute i'm getting divorced why is she getting attention for her divorce and i'm not getting any attention for my divorce you know you can tell she's like hangs out with lala a lot i think your divorces are very different one you moved on very quickly and it looked like you were kind of moved on before you got divorced and you knew what you were going to do you were confident in it and you found somebody else and you're happy like everybody else did rally around you but you don't need constant support like britney because britney is a fucking train wreck you know she You need support every day.

55:22Ronnie Karam: If you still had cars piling up on the track, people would be there to support you, too. You know what I mean? But Brittany doesn't. It's like, Brittany, you get the train back on the track. It starts going again. And then there's a cow on the train track again. And then Brittany's like, oh, my God, I can't believe it's another cow. And you're back there fixing it every time.

55:41Ben Mandelker: Yes. Brittany needs a cow catcher. But the thing is that, first of all, Brittany's is happening during the taping of the show. Also, Brittany and Jax are more famous. let's be honest and second of all yeah you do like you know it seems like you sort of have this shit handled i mean i think she does deserve support because i think jesse is a total narcissist i think jack seems like he's a narcissist and he's like actually dangerous too he's actually scarier than jesse jesse's like more venal but like jack's is like a really scary one and there's britney is actually pretty honest this episode in that she's like i'm trapped in the i'm trapped in the in the loop and i'm afraid that i'm gonna get sucked back into it so she's like she actually really needs all these people to to keep her like in going in the right direction like you said like people to clear those cows off her train tracks because she is uh otherwise she could just get sucked right back in so i think one of the examples that we get from michelle

56:42Ronnie Karam: of his santa barbara trip or to have to go stay at a separate place no one did that because he was the one who planned the trip and got the house. She's considering that to this. Like, well, why are they still letting Jesse in the house? I was like, oh, don't worry. They're still calling Jax and supporting Jax, and they'll welcome Jax into every shooting scene that they possibly can. So if you're worried that you're the only person being disrespected by all of these users and losers and boozers around you, you're not. They're doing it to Brittany, too. So don't let those fool you.

57:12Ben Mandelker: Yeah. Although I have to say, there is a part of me that does feel like Michelle is not totally without merit in what she's saying. It does suck. She's going through a vicious, awful divorce, and her mom is dying, and no one's really checking in on her. And that does kind of suck, no matter what. Even if she does seem like she's handling it better, and she is a more stable person than Brittany, it does suck. So I'm going to let her have a moment.

57:41Ronnie Karam: I'm not saying she needs to shut up or anything like that. I mean, I can get why she would be hurt, but she but i can i i feel like they do support her i just feel like the the it's not as dramatic like they're not having a party you know to pack up fancy stuff and all of that but i think it's just because brit still needs help moving on and michelle seems that she's moved on and also like brit is just that person who's like hey everyone i want to have a party to celebrate my independence okay it's called a beach ball party everyone bring a beach poker put a smile face on it's gonna be me and then bring it up about the beach boss and oh no i'm crying again the beach balls is jack's favorite kind of bowl oh no and britney and literally every scene she's in has a moment where she's okay guys gather round gather round everybody everybody gather round here's what jacks did today that motherfucker and then she like goes on a monologue and she rallies the troops and so she's like constantly working for those votes you know yeah and michelle's like who wants

58:34Ben Mandelker: free honey it's like it's just not the same it's like you know brit is just that person who just does it who just gets people all around and she also gives you know mcdonald's so there's something

58:45Ronnie Karam: to be said about that yeah you get happy meal toys if you go to brits okay yeah learn you can turn

58:53Ben Mandelker: your nose up against the french fries and the gorditas all you want but guess guess who's getting people in the seats it's brit for her divorce and not you so yeah so your tools now

59:02Ronnie Karam: they're gonna bag up all of jack's shit so she brings everybody over and um she's like giggling and throwing his stuff out of the closet. And Kristen's like, oh my God, separating his shoes? It's like a way to get the brain working. It's like how you work with little toddlers. That's what Jax needs. You're like, okay, match this. Let's be real. Jax needs it.

59:23Ben Mandelker: Kristen creating a sneaker puzzle is hilarious. Thinking one sneaker in one bag, another in another. It's great. Because it's actually going to drive him absolutely nuts. Because Jax is very much like OCD. He wants everything in order. So it is great chaos. And then Brit's like, hey, there's that thing. And look, there's that. And oh, it's his little denim jacket he likes to wear around. And then they show this like sentimental montage of Jax in his light denim jacket. And she starts to cry like, oh, the denim jacket.

59:52Ronnie Karam: Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm not going to feel for Jax for one fucking second. So Brittany's like, this is so hard. I mean, I still love this guy. You know, like I've got feelings. They ain't just going to disappear overnight. Where are you going to go? Just overnight.

1:00:09so everyone like throws all the uh throws all the bags in the garage and it's like yay they did it

1:00:15Ben Mandelker: and now it's one day until jacks leaves the facility so brit goes to meet nas a divorce lawyer i love nas i feel like nas doesn't take any bullshit you know she sort of has that look like i will destroy you in the courtroom like yeah go get him nas go do it yeah nas has that thing where

1:00:32Ronnie Karam: She's like, okay, so tell me what is going on. And Brittany tells her, and she's like, divorce. That is my situation. Well, you're a divorce lawyer, of course. So what are you going to tell her? Side of fries, go home.

1:00:45Ben Mandelker: Nas has a cousin who's going to fuck up Jax if it doesn't go right. Divorce, and if not, I call my cousin. Yeah. You leave.

1:00:53Ronnie Karam: So Brittany is telling him, you know, we've been married since 2019. We've been separated, you know, but it's not legal, though. Okay. But I moved to an Airbnb. and then we're fighting but you know what should i what should i protect myself with you know he's got blow-ups he's more aggressive like he's throwing furniture at me he's punched walls he hadn't laid hands on me he has laid coffee tables on me does that count yes that fucking counts britney jesus christ call the police next time by the way as well get this asshole thrown in jail i fucking hate this person not britney jacks obviously oh no naz is writing down and

1:01:25Ben Mandelker: her she's ready just writing notes and he just i just imagine that naz's notepad is just like I will destroy this man. I will destroy him.

1:01:33Ronnie Karam: So Brittany's like, all I'm hearing is chicken nuggets, taco supreme, and double pepperoni stuffed crust. Oh my God, it's like you're looking into my mind.

1:01:44Ben Mandelker: No, just the crumbs on your lapel. So Brittany's like, yeah, he's in rehab now. He doesn't get out till tomorrow. He's still rage texting me like, this was just the other night. I had to block him. So she shows Naz the phone and Naz is like, oh wow. wow, this is bad. This is really bad, you know? And she's like, how does he know that you're not home? And she's like, exactly. Is he stalking you? Yeah. He would look at me through cameras and stuff. And he was telling me like what I was wearing in different things.

1:02:14Ronnie Karam: God, Jesus. She's like, this is disturbing. I don't like it. So these texts that we see popping up, I know you're drinking. I have eyes and ears. Everyone is going to tell me if you tattle on me again go party while I'm in here I have everyone watching you like a hawk which

1:02:30Ben Mandelker: is he's so gross it's awful it's awful and so the Nazib is like yeah he's obsessed and it's really it's not healthy for you and he needs to control himself this is not good and Brittany's saying that they have you know a son together but that Jack stopped paying the mortgage whenever you know when when she moved out he stopped paying the mortgage and so this is where we hear even more maybe you already knew about this you may have been up on this I did not realize i knew that jacks was like in debt but what we find out is that he was in debt to the he was back when when they um moved in or when they got married he was already 1.2 million dollars in debt to the irs which is that's a lot of taxes you did not pay so he's already behind

1:03:14Ronnie Karam: and so when they got the house something you're not getting out of like the irs is not going to be like oh you're bankrupt okay we'll just forget about it nope they're coming for your ass so they folded it into the mortgage

1:03:26Ben Mandelker: which means birthday celebration yeah exactly so they pull it into the into the mortgage which means that essentially like she is now liable for his tax debt and so the fact that now he is like okay I'm releasing this house to you and you have to pay off the rest of the mortgage he's basically saying you're paying off my 1.2 million dollars of tax debt that's how I interpret it

1:03:52Ronnie Karam: Yeah, that's what he's doing. Crazy. Crazy. That's fucking insane. And so she's like, yeah, so now our mortgage is like$17 ,000 because of his arrears. Well, yeah, his ass did it. No, his arrears. Yeah, his butt. His little butts in trouble is what I'm saying. Arrears is a word. I know it is, girl. What do you think? I'm trying to kick his right now. Help me do it, NASA. That's my favorite burger joint in Kentucky. Arrears. Arrears. A-R-I-A-P-A-R-S. So it got to the point where they even garnished her bank account for 100 grand because they're married. And now he got a lease on this condo. He didn't tell her.

1:04:32Ronnie Karam: And now she wants her to take over the house. And she's like, and so you're going to start paying the mortgage? Okay, yeah. And pay all the expenses for the child and this and that. So what's he going to contribute? And she's like, but that's why I need help. Because I literally pay for everything for my son. I mean, this is nuts. So she's paying him everything because she thought he was taking care of this mortgage and his tax debt, which he has not been doing.

1:04:55Ben Mandelker: So this is so vile. It's so, so vile. Like this guy, like every episode of this show, just revealing another layer that this guy is of a depravity of Jax. And so then Nas is like, yeah, you need to get a divorce sooner than later. and what i was actually so proud of of britney was that she acted on it right away she's like can i do this today and i was actually you know i was afraid that she'd be like okay well we know that they're getting divorced so we already know that but like i was afraid that she would have an instinct of like okay this is good to know i'm gonna go back i'm gonna think on it and it's gonna stall out even longer and i was like proud that she got this advice and she was like despite the fact that she still has feelings for Jax she knew enough that she needed to do this step for herself I think that was great for her

1:05:48Ronnie Karam: so let's go to the Brits party so we go to Brits the gang is putting up a sign that says Brits over Jax's and they have t-shirts that say Brits Jax's is crossed through or no it's like the same font as Jax's but it says Brits and Zach's like my vision for Brits bar takeover is to erased Jacks from this bar. You know? Oh, and by the way, everybody's saying, oh, he's in a mental health facility. He's so fragile. He's not fragile. He is not fragile.

1:06:20Ben Mandelker: Good for you, Zach. Thank you for saying that on this television show.

1:06:24Ronnie Karam: Yeah, because no one else can fucking say this stuff on TV. This guy is full of shit. Don't believe anything he's saying. I wouldn't even be surprised if he wasn't in rehab this whole time.

1:06:35Ben Mandelker: Oh, 100%. Although I guess there was a receptionist who did get caught in the crossfire.

1:06:42Ronnie Karam: It was probably the lady at the Hyatt place.

1:06:46Ben Mandelker: Yeah.

1:06:46Ronnie Karam: She's like, I'm just trying to clean.

1:06:49Ben Mandelker: I'm just trying to sell Kit Kat bars from our lobby. So they set up the bar. They do all this stuff. It's fun. It's silly and everything. And they're all laughing about how it's going to piss off Jax. But the only one who's not enjoying this is Jesse. He's like, this isn't funny, man. Jason thinking Jax might think this is funny. because Jason's like, well, maybe Jax might find it funny. He's like, yeah, no, Jax won't find it funny at all. That's like me thinking Michelle would think it's funny that I called her an escort. Well, you still went forward with that, didn't you?

1:07:20Ronnie Karam: And found it funny, by the way. Yes. So yeah, Jesse, of course, aggro abuser, emotional abuser Jesse is totally Teams Jack. So he's like, yeah, that didn't resonate well and neither will this. So now Kristen is in the car with Brittany and she's like, I'm so proud of you. I went to a divorce lawyer, violence. i am filing you know she said she's gonna get jacks's arrears i was like you better girl you

1:07:45Ben Mandelker: go get her nance so then they bring britney to the bar she brings britney to the bar and she's like oh my god and she's like laughing and they walk in and the signs has brits she's like this is amazing it's great and then danny calls her the number one girl in the group and she's like oh she's like this is actually the sweetest thing ever like all my friends know just how much i've and going through and actually like how much work I put in this bar so to see it can change the bricks and all this is just such a wonderful exciting thing like I've got the best friends and so

1:08:15Ronnie Karam: meanwhile Michelle is watching all of this and she's like she's kind of gossiping with the girls and she's like the person that is really awful is right over there and nobody is saying anything okay Michelle this is where you lose people because Jesse being terrible doesn't mean Jax isn't terrible like yeah the real monsters over there as if Jax is not a real monster as well. I think that's where Michelle loses people is trying to make her thing bigger or compare her pain. Mine is worse. So Michelle is like,

1:08:48Ben Mandelker: I feel weird because I feel like I'm going through the same thing, but no one cares. And Janet's like, I get that. I was actually thinking, just thinking that when I saw this, I was like, Michelle's going through something like this. And then I did something else because this just was a boring thought to think about.

1:09:03Ronnie Karam: Janet's over there fueling it as usual. She's like, yeah, I was like, what is Michelle feeling like? Are you feeling like you don't get the same respect? Yeah, Janet, she probably is. Like how you and Jax or you and Jason are checking in on Jax all the time. And Michelle's like, yeah, I'm going to do the same thing. If not, where is my Zabord? And she's like, it hurts my feelings. So, yeah, we've already spoken on that probably.

1:09:29Ben Mandelker: Besides, didn't they? I mean, we've had several scenes where they were supporting Michelle all season long. And like you said, we discussed it. so um uh danny they're all sitting at a picnic table and danny's like doing shots but like he won't do the shot until he sees that nia's looking away so the moment nia turns her head he like does a shot real seems you know his smooth real smooth real good over there doing great doing great danny

1:09:53Ronnie Karam: and he's an idiot because he knows that his friends are against him and so he's just giving them fuel i mean he's just so stupid and so of course everybody's like oh my god and especially Janet and Jason, Darkseid Danny's here. Darkseid Danny's here. Look, Darkseid Danny's coming. Darkseid Danny. They're just memeing it to death. And Jesse's like, yeah, it's clear he's hiding his drinking for Nia, and there's 99 % success that Darkseid's coming out.

1:10:21Ben Mandelker: Yeah. So Kristen's like, I just want to ask, is there anything else? Do you have any resentment, or is there anything I'm unaware of, Janet? Because I just want to make sure we're good. And so she tells us that She met with Janet to squash things after the whole ring rumor, and she thought she and Janet were good, and they were on the same page. But then we see footage of Janet afterwards being still talking shit. Fuck that bitch.

1:10:52Ronnie Karam: Okay, so yeah, then we see Janet kind of freaking out at Sheena's house, being like, when has Kristen fucking Dowdy ever apologized for anything in her life? No, she's not sorry. She's sorry she got caught. girl came after my husband. Good luck. You just put a target on your back, bitch. And Kristen's like, yeah, so Sheena immediately called me after that and told me everything you said. This is a messy group of friends. Sheena. Sheena's trying to get back in so badly. She's causing all the drama on the show. She brought Jenna in this episode. Now she's telling Kristen everything. So funny.

1:11:29Ben Mandelker: So, and Luca's like, oh, this game of telephone. And Danny is drunk and sitting right there and he's like, yeah like why do you talk about everybody else and Kristen's like I'd rather you not talk about other people though and Jason's staring at Danny like stop talking to my wife that way Danny's like you know last summer I heard a lot about dance scheming and manipulations but you know I never really noticed too much of it because it wasn't towards me and now I'm trying to see what people are talking about so he's like I'm pissed about it you know

1:11:58Ronnie Karam: you're talking about everybody and Kristen's like I very much agree with you and puts her arm around Danny and Danny's like I agree and he's like I'm gonna call shit out now and Jenna's like I'm only guilty of talking about things that are all woven together and he's like no no no listen you guys are saying that you guys are good with Jasmine and he's like Daniel Daniel stop it stop it Daniel Daniel Daniel and they're like and Jasmine's like no we're good we talked and he goes oh you talked and she's like yeah we talked so we're good he's like oh you're good in that situation about the ring and they're like yeah and jason's like okay and we're not good about other stuff is that what you're saying and he's like no but it's first of all it's not like screaming or being like you stupid bitch he's not doing anything like that he's just like yeah janet you're talking shit about people like you did with jasmine they're like oh no we didn't catch you up we're already done but they're making it sound like danny's like coming at janet with a baseball bat being like oh fuck you you dumb bitch and he's not he's just saying like i'm pissed about all this stuff that you're starting does the man have a right drunk people have the right to say what they feel as well

1:13:11Ben Mandelker: yeah but they know i think the difference is it's like in the context of like larger danny and sober danny they're like oh because he's all of a sudden you know because his eyes are do turn black you know he never really he doesn't his eyes just are black actually they're just like i was

1:13:24Ronnie Karam: gonna say i've never seen his eyes they're two slitted clothes i can't see what he's always like

1:13:28Ben Mandelker: I don't, there is no whiteness in his eyes. There's just, it's just like two dark pools. And so I think, you know, he goes from being like, yeah, born to fortune, going to go to Santa Clarita to like, yeah, you were talking, why did you get buttoned? Everyone's business. And so everyone just sort of sees this like, oh, here it comes. She's starting, you know? So, you know, and he is uncomfortable. She's like, Daniel, you can't speak for someone else. And so we're kind of like, okay, let's get, let's get him out of the way. Let's go away. Let's go away. You know, so.

1:13:56Ronnie Karam: So Kristen and Nia go to the bar And then Janet of course Is like Danny's wasted Jumping into this conversation Obviously dark side Danny TM Janet So Jason's like Danny just relax It's not going to go how you think it's going to go He's like wow wow wow Wow

1:14:19Ben Mandelker: He's like what did you call Because then Janet's like oh wow He's like Danny Darko's here What did you say? What did you call me? Danny Darko? I tried out for that role. I lost it to Jake Gyllenhaal. I'm so mad about it.

1:14:31Ronnie Karam: I still have the bunny costume.

1:14:35Ben Mandelker: Okay, you're being fucking weird right now. Just relax. Okay, Danny? You're being fucking weird. Yeah, yeah. Okay, well, you're being fucking stupid. Okay. Wow. Wow. Danny Darko. I can't believe he said that.

1:14:46Ronnie Karam: So he's an idiot for even drinking because he didn't even do anything wrong in this. And now they can be like, oh, my God. Danny got drunk and tried to talk to Janet. Like now she's uncomfortable again.

1:14:55Ben Mandelker: And of course, Janet then goes to that place where she's like, well, my husband's not the one out here grabbing asses. So yeah. So now, of course, you're right.

1:15:06Ronnie Karam: By the way, being like classic Janet, pointing fingers at everyone else. Like we just talked about you going after other people and then you immediately go after other people. Don't get the point, Janet. Stop talking about other people. It's like, yes, Luke.

1:15:18Ben Mandelker: So Nia's mad. She's like, I'm frustrated with Daniel. Like he just kept on poking at Janet. it but like it's also kind of like who do you think you are why are you coming for my husband you're supposed to be our friends i don't get it i don't know why she's coming for daniel

1:15:34Ronnie Karam: oh my gosh so then we go to janet jace and jesse and luke and luke's like yeah i mean he is a lightweight and janet's like yeah and i've spoken about things he did in this bar but so has everyone else i just happen to add alcoholic and drug addict on top of it big deal big you know what

1:15:51Ben Mandelker: deal. I'm not the ass grabber. He's mad at himself. He's misplacing the anger on me. That's what's happening. He's mad at himself because he has a drinking problem and he grabs asses. And guess what? He kills kittens. Yeah, there I said it. He grabs them and throws them into the LA River at peak times. That's right. I said it all.

1:16:10Ronnie Karam: And he comes to this bar and he does stuff that he's embarrassed by and he's blaming me for talking about it instead of being mad at himself for what he's done. Oh my god, you should all be ashamed of yourself for going to Jax's in the first place. Okay? Yeah. You're all drunk and you're all there making ass out of yourselves by being there at all. And the man didn't even say anything to you, except why you do that? Why are you calling me Darkside Danny over and over, insinuating that he's got a drug and alcohol problem over and over again on national TV. Like, you're like, why would he be mad?

1:16:40Ronnie Karam: Fucking Janet. But also, Danny, get it together. Don't drink around this woman. I'm not going to defend Danny too hard. Yeah, I mean, look, Look, Danny made the mistake of getting drunk, but that's all he did. He didn't say anything disrespectful or out of line than what anybody else did. This woman's been talking about him for weeks. I think he has a right to be like, what the hell? Where are you coming from?

1:17:00Ben Mandelker: I will also say, though, that if you have a history of being like a sloppy drunk in the group, that like as you start to like heat up again and you're taking secret drinks when your wife isn't looking, I think you've earned the right for people to roll their eyes and be like, oh, God, here he goes again. Like, that's just what happens. If you're a sloppy, you are going to get pushed back.

1:17:17Ronnie Karam: Well, that's why I'm saying he's stupid. but I also think he has the right to confront somebody who's been talking shit about him for weeks and not in disrespectful way. Yeah, that's what this show is. But with him, they're like, Danny Darkside, Danny Darkside, call social security and say, Danny's uncomfortable.

1:17:36Ben Mandelker: So, meanwhile, Brittany sits down with Jesse. She says, Hey, you not drinking tonight? Brits! He's like, no. I want to be clear-headed for tomorrow. So he says, he tells us that he's picking up Jax from rehab. These two. And he's like, the fucking night before, we're changing the name of his bar that he's in love with, covering his name and putting Brit's name over it. Fan-fucking-tastic. Jax was very specific about including Brittany in the entire process. That's why it's called Jax is. It's not called Jax and Brit's. I'm not falling for any of Jesse's revisionist history about Jax and trying to make Jax into the victim here in this situation.

1:18:19Ben Mandelker: No, no, no.

1:18:20Ronnie Karam: What a giver of him to include Brittany. Brittany, who he brought in to design everything and do all of the work while he did fucking nothing, includes spending his own money and then refused to put her name on it as well. Instead of making it Jackson Brits, only made it his when she was doing all the work to get it. What a generous person.

1:18:38Ben Mandelker: Where Jax goes and gets to hit on all the waitresses there. Now, I have to say, here's what really pissed me off. So, Brittany tells Jesse that they packed up all of Jax's stuff. And Jesse goes, you know, I don't want him to come out and see his shit packed up, hear from somebody that, you know, there are these shirts floating around that say Brits. And then he goes on the attack and just starts attacking people. So how about you say, I don't want to find out that Jax is attacking people. I don't want to find out that you did all this stuff and he starts attacking. Because it totally takes away all responsibility and accountability for Jax.

1:19:09Ben Mandelker: If you're saying like, this is shitty. If you do all this stuff, Jax is going to start going on a rampage. How about you go after the guy whose instinct is to go on a rampage? he is the one who's more at fault here yeah why are you blaming everybody else's for joe

1:19:21Ronnie Karam: everybody else for jack's shit so britney's like well if he does that it's proof he ain't gonna change and when it comes to me jack's i got him by the balls because i could do worse if i wanted to and i ain't doing it but he needs to realize and respect me for my decisions and so jesse's like but how much winning do you have to do how much winning has she done jesse she's how much lose millions of dollars she had to suffer this guy she's gonna lose her house because of this guy. She's been recorded and stalked by this guy. What is she winning exactly, Jesse? You're such a fucking piece of shit.

1:19:52Ronnie Karam: And now everybody is going to be going crazy because the rest of the cast has got everybody focused on Sloppy Danny instead of this piece of shit who's sitting here standing up for an abuser. And Jesse and Jason, who's also going to be over there standing up for an abuser in two seconds. So fuck your self-righteous bullshit lady.

1:20:11Ben Mandelker: I know. How much winning do you have to do? She gets to do all the winning that she wants and deserves because she's been stuck in the loser bucket with jacks for way too long and and by the way jesse why are you complaining about how much winning you know that does does britney need to have and yet you seem quite content to go after more quote-unquote winning moments against michelle right when you're trying to threaten

1:20:32Ronnie Karam: to move to orange county so michelle can't have custody of the kid and all this other shit shut up jesse yeah you know she's like well he ain't gonna win against me i'm sorry he's not and he He goes, but that's what I'm saying. Like, why does it have to be winning? And he goes, well, we shall see. It's T minus 12 hours and counting, people. Yeah, fuck Jax and fuck you, dude.

1:20:52Ben Mandelker: You're fucking crazy. We'll see how this all pans out next week, live in Los Angeles at our show at the Fonda. So that is going to be a wild one. That's going to be so great. And we hope everyone is there. And if Jax decides to crash our show once again, I'm hoping he doesn't. He'll be kicked out. None of us want to see his face. He will get kicked out.

1:21:15Ronnie Karam: If you imagine that wouldn't crash the show, you'd have to pay to get into this one. The other one, he could just wander in off the streets like, hey, hey, I heard you were talking about me. Go ahead. Ask me anything. Ask me whatever you want. I can lie about whatever answer you need me to.

1:21:28Ben Mandelker: Yeah. Okay, everyone, thanks so much for being here. What a fun show. It is a fun show despite it being so dark. And we'll catch you in the next one. Bye. Bye. Watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. Our way is the Amber way. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. She can run my country. It's Angie McGovern. It's Always Automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clap.

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