#3073 Wife Swap The Real Housewives Edition S1E4: Wendy City

0:21Hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens! I'm Ronnie, and that's Ben over there. Hello, Ben. Hi, Ronnie. How's it going? Good. What's going on with you? Not much. Just, you know, we're here in the middle of the week. BravoCon is upon us. We're headed off to BravoCon. Can't wait. Yes, right now, actually. We are there right now as this airs, as this recap airs. We are at BravoCon, and it's going to be super fun this weekend, And Saturday night in Las Vegas at a place called Beer Park. Beer Park. That is where we are going to be having our get-together. For Watch What Crap happens, listeners, it's free.

1:02So just come. We have drinks. We have, I mean, it's not free. It's a cash bar. But there's cocktail, you know, themed cocktails and stuff like that. It's going to be super fun. Bring your friends. It's going to be a big party over there. So you guys can make it. Right by everything that's happening. It's in Paris, Las Vegas. It's got a view of the fountains down below. So if you're visiting Vanderpump a Paris, then just head on upstairs and join us for Crappin's a Beer Park. Beer Park. Beer Park. It's going to be great. Yeah, Beer Park. So thanks, Beer Park, for having us. We're super excited to have this party.

1:40And we will see you guys over there. Also, when we come back, Monday will be crappy hour. I'm sure we'll be talking about some BravoCon stuff. we did. This week's bonus is Real Housewives of Beverly Hills trailer. You find that over on Patreon. That's also where you find our videos on Crappins On Demand. So thanks for being here, everybody. Today, we are doing the season finale of Wife Swappa with Wendy. This is Wendy's big Wife Swap episode that they were going to air first, and then they put off until the very end because of her arrest. Now, this episode was pretty good, but Bravo really does a number on their programming sometimes.

2:23They decided to put this with Real Housewives of Potomac so that everybody would have to watch it. But then it didn't record with Real Housewives of Potomac. So if you recorded this, then it did not record Wiveswap. It only got the first hour, which was Potomac, which meant that you had to get this at 1.30 in the morning when they re-aired the Wiveswap. Bravo stop just stop it And then they also packaged watch what happens Live into this two and a half hour block To try and get the ratings for everything Off of Potomac guys we'll watch your shows But stop trying to trick us You bastard I know Well It's interesting this was supposed to be The season premiere of Wife Swap And it wound up being the season finale I actually think It worked out for the best because I think the Angie Kay episode was the best of the season I think that was their strongest episode and that was the best one to lead off the entire franchise.

3:17So I think it actually was really good that Angie started the show. And this episode was, it was a weird one, I thought, because I think we all expected Wendy to just like lay into this lady on the show. And she didn't, she sort of politely did, but she didn't. It was a very nice one. I was going to say, how did she not lay into the lady? She did lay into her. I thought she was going to really lay in about the carpet. She was. And it was a nice episode. All the episodes have been surprisingly very nice and lovely. But I felt like this episode the woman may, that the wife may have learned from Wendy but there's not a chance in hell that Wendy took anything not a single ounce, shred, smidgen or molecule from the woman she swapped with.

4:11She's like, get this trash out of my house right now. My way is still the best way. Yes. It was pretty interesting to watch. There was definitely a layer of nervousness through this because, I mean, the reason we expected Wendy to lay into the woman was because of the previews and how they showed Wendy reacting to this and the stain on the carpet and stuff like that. but then when we actually watched the episode I mean I thought it was pretty interesting with what a loser the other mom kind of came off as and how I think the whole audience was like fuck her and she was a very nice lady and probably has some severe depression issues or something's going on there but there's something going on there but you know this was this was yikes I mean the other lady did not come off looking great and she's been all over Reddit like oh my god you guys they're not listening to our episode and TV guides so be sure you watch it I was so excited to do it.

5:04And she's posting all these threads. And everyone's like, hey, girl, that's so exciting. You're on, you know, you're on Wife Swap. And I was like, oh, my God. I don't think she realized what a trash box she ended up looking like. Well, I was just like, is she? I really was concerned for her. I was like, she sort of sounds depressed. She, like, stays in bed all day. She just doesn't really leave her room. Everyone has to do everything else. And I'm not saying that in a judgy way. I'm just like, I was like, should we do a wellness check on her? Like, something. and she was like, I'm really burnt out.

5:32I was like, there's something going on with this lady that's deeper than what this show is expressing. They're like, oh my God, well, I used to live this type A personality and I moved to Florida. I'm just like, ugh, now I'm just gonna relax. I was like, I feel like we should maybe just have a check-in. Let's have a group. We can all come together, check in on this lady, make sure everything really is okay. But yeah, it was a little, I felt like it was darker around the edges than the show was trying to acknowledge, I felt. Yeah, I thought it was a great episode, actually. I think it was one of the best ones.

6:06I mean, there were only four, but yeah, I thought it was good. And, you know, all of them tried to bring in a housewife to support the other housewife, you know, like a guest star appearance. And this one didn't. They brought Wendy's mother instead. And I thought that was an extremely wise decision. That shit was hilarious. That was amazing. But anyway, let's start it up. Let's start it up. We're in Potomac. And we see Wendy and Eddie talking. And Wendy is saying, without a schedule, all things fail. If you don't have a schedule, what are you doing in your life? We have three kids. Do you know how hard it is to schedule them?

6:40And also a fake robbery? You have to make sure you have a timetable. Yeah, so she introduces her kids, Carter, Cruz, and Cameron. And then she reminds us that in Nigerian culture, education is the main focal point. So they will have multiple degrees. and lots of debt that they can hopefully one day learn to insurance fraud to pay off. And - You can't have charges without degrees, okay? That's right. To paraphrase Karen Huger. You gotta have degrees to have charges. So the producer's like, is your mom strict? And he's like, I don't like my mom. Carter's like, I don't like my mom's rules, but we have to obey them.

7:18And when he's like, yeah, they don't get chips. We don't do sugary drinks. Wait, I hear a noise. is that one of my kids what are you eating chips it's like you see you see it's like you do these chips i mean you've got chips in the house so it's coming from inside the house so wendy says um like i wake up at 5 a.m the kids are dressed by 7 they breakfast and are ready by 7 15 dinner between 5 30 and 6 7 is bath time 8 45 is prayer 9 is bedtime eddie's like yeah wendy's rules for me are follow Wendy's rules. I'm pretty much her supporting staff. Is there any surprise that I got into weed? There's 15 full minutes for prayer.

7:57What the hell are you guys praying for? This is how you pray. God, thanks for everything. Love you. Mean it. Bye. Amen. That's it. That's like the only break they get. I hope they don't have to do a 15 minute prayer because that's hideous. That's really intense. Yeah. So then Wendy is like, you know, my love of structure comes from I'm having no structure because I was a latchkey kid and my mom worked too much. So I wanted to make sure that when I had kids, I was more present with the clock. And Eddie is like, yeah, there needs to be a balance. Like you balance. He's like, okay. He's on one foot.

8:33I'll do whatever you say. Whatever you say. Your balance window's closed. Okay. Time for prayer. But that's, it's not even 845. It's post-balance prayer. Sorry. And she's like, yeah, there was no question. And he's like, yeah, you know, if I were to give you advice, I'd say balance your schedule. And she's like, yeah, no one asked you to question. There was no ask for advice. Yeah, no one asked you advice. So now we go to Naples, Florida, to the Shapiros. So we meet Alethea. And she's like, I'd like for you to meet Breck. Ferrets are just amazing pets. The only bad thing is they're a little stinky.

9:14I'm Alethea, ferret mom. And I'm a stay-at-home mom. My husband, Craig, we are college sweethearts. We have four children and, of course, a ferret and many other animals. Because apparently that's the only people you can cast on this show. People with tons of animals. Yeah. We want to freak clean people out with dirty poop people. Okay? That's what we're going for. Poor people are dirty. Okay? I hope that America has understood that unless you are rich and on housewives, you are a dirty motherfucker. That's it. That's really very true. And you probably poop in a hole in the ground. And you live with disgusting animals.

9:45And that's what Bravo's really trying to get across. And you don't have enough time together with the family at the table. That's the other running thing. If you're poor, that means people are eating at different times. Although I guess that was Emily's family. Well, that still tracks. Yeah. Yeah. Well, comparatively, yeah. She was the poor one on that episode. She was the poor one. So only in Orange County does it reverse. Because the other people had the giant mansion with the farm. And Emily just had the tiny house where the woman's like, oh, what a nice small little house. We don't eat together as a family.

10:21Classic poor person. Wasn't this lady's name Althea? Alethea doesn't sound right. I think it would have stuck out to me if it was Alethea because that's like how I say Alethea, you know, because I'm gay. I have gay tongue. So I'm like Alethea. And that's why I don't like people named Alethea because it's hard for me to say it. I think you actually are right. I think like maybe her name is spelled like Alethea, but I'm going to have trouble because I just got through an entire Potomac episode earlier this week, really struggling to call Jazzy Jazzy instead of Jassy. And now we have Althea. What is Brava doing to me?

10:59I'm a very phonetic person. I'm a very I'm a phonetic literalist. I can't deal with this. So Althea is telling us that she has a lot of animals, but they're stinky and she's a stay at home mom. And her husband is Craig and they were college sweethearts. And she's got four kids and two girls and two boys. And she's created a life of her dreams where she is just surrounded by hobbies. All she does all day is everything she wants. And she has embraced this lifestyle of low demand, apparently, which basically means empowering your children to be independent. Now, when she said this and she explained it, I loved her.

11:38I was like, this is amazing. She's like, why do I have to pack my kids' lunches? They have hands. They can pack their lunches. They know what they want. They should do it. I hate helicopter parents. So, so far, I'm like, this sounds great. You know, I believe that children should have jobs, which is why I support, you know, terrible companies that deliver things to me in two seconds. Like, give me a Timu any day. Give me an iPhone. Some five-year-old made it. You know what I mean? Like an American tale, like Fievel, he was actually, I didn't feel bad for him. I felt like he was actually growing as a mouse, as a little mouse.

12:11his character was growing. But I think that - Labor forms personality, okay? I know what you're saying. But the thing is this, though, is that when she says low-demand parenting, that to me did not strike me as I want my children to be stridently independent, where to me that's kind of like hands-off parenting or whatever. Low-demand parenting, I was like, okay you just don't want to deal with your kids do you that's what it is and she's trying to assign all this all these lofty ambitions like they're going to become really independent i was like i don't know about that but i but at this point i know you're saying the jury's still out we're gonna see if she actually yeah we didn't know yet what she meant but at this point i thought love it she's great but there was some signs there were some signs that about this lady being crazy Which we'll get to in a minute.

13:07So Dylan's like, yeah, our mom does her own thing. She's always crocheting or playing with the animals. One of these kids has that stupid hair. It's like a new version of the mushroom hair where they comb it all forward. But this one, he comes forward and he doesn't curl it anymore. Now it's just flat. It's like an awning at a restaurant that comes out. Yeah, I feel like it looks like a flying saucer that landed on his head. Yeah, poor thing. So he's got that. And he's like, yeah, she just wants to crochet. She doesn't give us haircuts or anything like that. It's really that we don't wash our hair.

13:37Please wash my hair. Yeah. And she is like, you know, a few years ago, we lived in New York. We lived such an overscheduled life. Everything had to be perfect. They were booked fun. Play dates eight days a week in advance. It was just so suffocating. They had the worst friends. And then ultimately that led to burnout. And when we moved to Florida, I found another way to parent, which is just a hole up in the room and do crocheting all day and then see if their kids are alive at the end of the day. It's just more stressful for you. You know, it's way more stressful for you, but like, you don't have to be scheduled and I want to share it with another family.

14:09Yeah. And Dylan says, yeah, mom's always crocheting. And one of the kids goes, yeah, I wish my mom could dinner more often. And the other kid goes, yeah. And also a mom that's not lazy. Oof. Ouch. I mean, the first second that the cameras come in, your kids are begging for a new mom. That's not good. Yeah. It's one thing to be like, to encourage your kids to be independent. And that when they are like complaining and saying things like, mom, make me this, you say, no, you have to make it yourself. Cause that's, that is parenting still. Cause right. You're still, you're still saying I'm teaching you a lesson that you have to be independent, but sometimes it would just be like, you're just not present.

14:46And then you're starting to say, um, I think you're just trying to make a, You're creating a narrative for what's going on in your life right now. That's trying to make you sound like you're doing more than you are. Yeah. So Wendy is finding out where she's going to go. They get it on the phone. And so all the family gathers around. And it's Naples, Florida. And she screams. And Eddie's like, you know that has crocodiles, right? And she's like, oh, my God, crocodile? It's the swamp people. Carter's like, I'm going to pray for you at 845, right? Yes, mother. so then and also being sent to florida i mean wendy is a political commentator and she's an extremely liberal commentator and you know i think we all had the same thought like when you're going to florida it's like oh shit what part of florida is this how bad is this what am i in store for is this going to be political fighting am i allowed to say again is naples on the east coast or the west coast of Florida.

15:47Somewhere. Oh, no. That's where the alligators are. So Althea gets a thing that says, welcome to Potomac, Maryland. She's like, oh, okay. All right, interesting. And so Wendy arrives and she's like, honey, I'm home. Althea finds out and she doesn't have any idea. She does not watch his show. You can tell. Because she was so excited to be on a Bravo show. And then she's like, Potomac, Google the cast, honey. It's like, oh. Naples is on the West Coast. I guess it's out of Fort Myers. Wendy's like, wait a second. Where's the furniture? There's no furniture in here. The foyer, the living room, there's no furniture.

16:28There's just many different plastic basketball hoops that are hanging. It's weird. There's no couches, nothing. It's a big blank room except for basketball hoops. Then a TV hanging on the wall, but there's nothing to sit on and watch the TV. It's bizarre. She just gives it to the kids to play basketball in. That's fucking crazy. It's like a janky Dave and Bust. Well, she's not. I meant it's like one of those Airbnbs you go into. You're like, what? And she calls it a makeshift Dave and Busters. Here's what I don't understand. This is, as far as we can tell, like a kind of a Florida. It's not necessarily maybe a McMansion, but it's like a nice size home.

17:02Were they not able to convert any other room into like the playroom? Could they turn the garage into the basketball zone? It just seems strange that they just have no interest in even using that space for any sort of seating or not luxury, just comfort. Yeah. So Althea loves Wendy's house. And as we see her driving through Wendy's neighborhood and just looking at all these homes and she's like, oh, my God. Wow. Because those are big, you know, East Coast mansions, basically. And she's like, wow. So then we see Wendy's. She loves it. She's like, oh, it's a nice brick colonial house. Dorothy's not in Kansas anymore.

17:44She's in Maryland. Wow. So she walks in, and this is the first sign that she's crazy because she's wearing a jumpsuit, and it has peace signs and yin and yang signs all over it, and we know what that means. Fucking crazy person just barely, you know, white-knuckling it through life trying to keep it together. Yeah, she's like trying to be super positive, And it's like, lady, no. So then Wendy is walking around and she's like, oh, wow, four kids. Okay. All right. Let's see. And then she walks around the corner and she's like, oh, my God, what's that? And it's like a cat. The cat's just staring at her like, oh, God.

18:23She starts screaming at the cat. She's ridiculous. She's like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. It's a cat. It's a cat. You've never seen a cat before? I know. I felt like I thought it was going to be some, I thought it would be like a snake or some other pet, but it was just a cat. I mean, Wendy had to deal with a full-on pig last week. not wendy emily yeah it's time for a commercial it's time for a crappin's commercial

18:49so she screams at the top of her lungs when she sees the cat and uh she's like dr doolittle what is this dr doolittle and althea walks to her house and goes oh cute kids wow this house doesn't really look ball friendly no ma 'am that's also the running uh theme with the Real Housewives houses that they are sterile and cold. That's also me in general. Don't throw a ball at me. Don't throw a ball at me. We all know, do not throw it at me. I'll just scream and start yelling and run away. So now it's time for the house rules. And hers, this lady, Althea, because she's wacky. She's handwritten the rules on different colors of paper.

19:28So each page is a different color. And Wendy's like, oh, okay. So she doesn't want to use the computer. Okay. Well, I use Canva for her rules. So I guess when he is so disgusted by this handwritten, like construction paper rule set, she's like, really? You don't even have any, you don't, you don't have like Microsoft word or pages, Clara's works, anything. Come on. So when he's like, dear mom, she's reading the rules, dear mom, animals are a big part of our family. So please treat them like your fur babies. And she goes, Oh Jesus, no. And in this house, we don't wear, we don't sweat, sweat, sweat, the small stuff.

20:02And then like a dog walks up to her and when he's like, I'm like, Wendy, it's a little dog. You can't use up all your screams. There's still a chinchilla to meet. She's ridiculous. And she has dogs. What is she so afraid? It's like this little furry dog. Like you've got the same size dogs. It's like, dog. So this was where I was kind of worried that Wendy was just going to be an asshole through this episode. Same. Make like every single thing seem disgusting. But by the end, I was completely on her side. I was like, wow, Wendy's nicer than I would have been in this situation. Yeah, Wendy was great.

20:36I would have called social services, honestly. Not with the dogs, but throughout the episode. I just, you know, don't tell Gina that. She'll get very upset. So Althea's reading her rules, and they say, there's a clear schedule in the house, and the schedule must be adhered to. That means you, my dear friend, must be awake no later than 5.30 a.m. And then back to Wendy reading rules. in this house, we don't have a lot of rules and routines. Routines are hard for us to stick to. So bedtime chores and homework, she's like, wait, they don't have a schedule? Oh God. First, no computer, then no schedule.

21:13I don't know what I'm going to do. Yeah, and then of course, Wendy's schedule is like, get the kids out of bed by 7.15. House has to be vacuumed and organized by 10. Begin dinner prep by one. Dinner served no later than six. Bath time at seven. Prayer time is 8.45. Everyone in bed by nine. Yikes. uh so then wendy reads hers and so we moved to florida from new york to embrace a no stress lifestyle good luck no schedule no rules and wendy's like what am i weeding yeah so then wendy goes into the laundry room and surprise there's a guy in there she's like oh you've been here you've been hearing me screaming around the house you know that's probably what She was thinking like, I've just been doing these big screams for the animals.

21:58And there's been a guy here listening the entire time. And of course this guy here screaming in the house and doesn't come out of his little hobby hole. So she's used to it. Yeah. So what are you doing? I thought my wife was back rubbing lipstick all over her face, turning in circles in the living room, you know, crying softly. So he's like, yeah, hi, I do. I do some trading and some financial consulting back here. and she's usually in her room crocheting or playing with the animals. And I think you met some of the cats outside. She's like, how many cats are there? I think there's five. I don't know.

22:31I haven't left this room in about six years. So I don't really know what's out there anymore. Yeah. Five cats, two ferrets, a chinchilla. Then we got some ducks. She's like, love that. Love that. Love that for you guys. And he's like, yeah, we put my laundry, we put my office in the laundry room. So, you know, I get the full dual purpose. I can do my full-time job and I do the laundry. but it works for me it works for me you know does not work for you literally doing laundry and day trading at the same time so then um althea meets the kids and um dylan who's that's wendy's daughter is like i wasn't sure what to expect high heels and makeup and hair and everything i was kind of taken aback but i was also informed that i only have a five minute slot on my schedule to be taken aback and then I have to go forward with prayer.

23:26So Althea is asking Eddie, does your wife really get up at 5.30 PM? And by the way, the rule said no later than 5.30 PM. So she's like, she gets up at 5.30 AM. Is that crazy? And he's like, oh yeah. Well, what time do you get up? She goes, oh no, I don't even set my alarm he's like so six she's like no no no no sir that's my favorite i have to say one of my favorite things is when i talk to people who have families and like if i say oh i had to wake up at eight this morning or or if i i mean i usually wake up around eight ish anyway but if i say I'm like, I have to wake up at 7.30. They just look at me like, fuck off.

24:11Seriously. I know that's true. I get up at 6.30. Well, I wake up at 6.30, but I do not get up at 6.30. I wake up at 6.30. I do my morning routine for my children, which is give the dog food and then let him go outside. And then I go back to bed until I have to do this. Yeah, it's just so funny. Like parents, it's like, you get to sleep later than 6 a.m.? What's that like? So then back at the other house, Wendy is learning that the husband does all the morning duties and takes care of the kids and all that. And she's like, okay, well, what time does mommy duty start? And the kids are like 12. They're like, 12?

24:58And they're like, yeah, she sleeps in. And Wendy's like, she sleeps till noon every day? And they're like, yeah. And then now I'm starting to worry. Because Althea at first seemed like fun. But now we're seeing that Althea's version of no pressure parenting means no pressure on her. The husband has to do everything. And then we learn she has a daughter that does everything else. She's parentified, which is fucking terrible. And so her daughter is raising her children. And then it's getting sad. because it's like this selfish woman sleeps till 12 and then crochets all day while her family does all the work it's not cool yeah i think when she had that breakdown in new york she was like i can't do this anymore and her husband was like please don't leave us we'll live a life where you can just do whatever you want i'll do everything just don't leave yeah that might be true i mean that's what i'm saying like there's some there's darkness on the edges of this of this episode with this lady where it's like there's something there's something deeper going on i firmly believe because this is not a situation of reiterating what I said earlier of like, no kids, you can't rely on me.

26:02You need to do this independently. And you know, uh, I'm going to be doing this for the, I'm doing this right now for the household or for my job or for whatever I need to do. And you need to do this. You need to take care of yourself. This sort of feels like she's absent. It's like absent parenting, not so much low demand parenting. Yeah. She's just a roommate in a house with someone with kids or something. And it's interesting that we have this theme two weeks in a row because last week Emily was in bed all day and she didn't want to come out and hang out with her kids. Like she had to actually learn to spend time with her kids.

26:34And Emily's complaint about her mother is that her mother was always depressed and would never take care of her. So it's weird that it keeps coming back. Well, it's also why I'm grateful that the season was only four episodes because already within like two or three episodes, there are a lot of like recurring themes. It was like animals, dirtiness, attentiveness to family time. And so the novelty is already actually kind of like wearing pretty thin for me. Like I feel like four and I'm like set, I'm done. I really think this is actually a very charming show. And like, but I've, it's like, it's done all that I need to do.

27:09It's not, every episode is like, is covering decreasingly new ground. Is that even a grammatically correct way to say something? But it is fascinating the overlap that we do see. It's interesting, or at least what they are presenting, and that we have this overlap two weeks in a row. Yeah. Wendy is dressed to the nines. She's wearing these gold, really high, high heels, and this really fancy outfit. And they're like, okay, well, you're going to be like your mom today. You're going to be like our mom today, so you need to change. And she's like, oh, God, well, I got to wear a maxi dress. Very comfortable.

27:45but she comes out in like a little jogging outfit or whatever. Which is cute. Yeah. And Althea has to dress fancy, which is hilarious because what are you, Paula Poundstone? Is this like a Paula Poundstone karaoke? What are you doing? She clearly, I mean, obviously she got heads up that she had to dress this way because she packed some sort of ill fitting business suit from like 1989. Like there definitely needed to be a brick wall behind her and a microphone. So she could like tell stories about being caught in traffic. but I was like what business suit is this yeah um so then let's see here so Susan is like okay well what's the typical dinner you cook for your family and I'll see oh wait oh this is Wendy's mom Susan okay so Wendy's mom comes over and she just looks at this lady like already she's like what is this suit who who is this person so she's like we're gonna make okra soup for the family So they sit down and they're, okra's not easy.

28:47Like okra takes a lot of prep and work and all the family sits around and does it together. So they're doing that. And Susan's like, okay, so what's the typical dinner you cook for your family? And she's like, uh, yeah, I didn't inherit that trait. So what do you want me to do? She goes, wash the okra. So she just runs water over it and she goes, am I doing it right? She goes, no. God, what am I going to do with you? She's like, this lady's an idiot. And she does not pretend that this lady is not an idiot. Susan is so disgusted by this lady's lack of initiative and like world experience. She's like, I raised my daughter to get four degrees and it's still not enough.

29:23She needs to get three more. This lady can't even put degree on his deodorant. Like, where did you find this loser? So then Cruz goes, Cruz says to Althea, she's like, you don't even know what you're doing. And Susan goes, okay, one, two, three slice. You have to get it together. I mean, you have to treat it with respect. I mean, do you need help cooking with your kids? Like, what's wrong with you? She's like, well, my mom comes over and teaches my daughters how to cook and my sons. And Susan goes, and you just stay in bed? And she goes, yep. She goes, what kind of person are you?

30:01Because, well, it makes me very happy that she's passing on the skills. Oh, my goodness. I can't get you. You are the bystander. God help me. so then we go oh no so then she's like the best reflection of my parenting style is that I always get glowing reviews about my children I mean they do well in school even without me enforcing homework and she goes you're against homework she goes yeah she goes oh my god and you're taking credit for your kids coming out right you know what they have no choice but to work hard because you're kind of lazy she's like she just looks at the camera and she's like damn this lady's eating me alive Yeah, she does not care.

30:41She's like, I don't care if the mandate of the show is to be uplifting and show how we can grow from our differences. She's like, you are failing. You're a fucking loser. Love Wendy's mom. She's like, you suck, bro. So then we go over to the other house and Wendy is like, so Craig, you do everything. You walk the dog, you do the laundry. And the kid's like, yeah, he does everything. She goes, you take the kids to the sport? She goes, yep. and one of the kids is like, I'm like, mom, she just leaves me there. And he goes, but she comes to your games. Yeah, but she doesn't even watch them. And the dad's like, that's not true.

31:16And he's like, uh-huh, she's just on her phone the whole time. When this mom's getting dressed. I don't dress. So whatever she does, I'll do it. So then now it's 9 o 'clock and basically the kids, the Shapiros are playing basketball. The Ocephos are going like praying and going to bed. And now it's like, it's after midnight and the kids are still playing basketball. They're making so much noise. And Wendy's like losing her mind. So now it's day two. And Wendy's like, okay, Wendy's rule. I'm sorry. This is Wendy's rule in the void. My voice is going to you. Althea wake up at five 30, wake up the kids by six 30.

31:56So she wakes up at six 39, which is significantly later. And she's the only, I feel like she's the only wife we've seen who like blatantly disrespects the rules of anyone else. And that goes for all housewives and wives or whatever. So she's just like, whatever, I'm sleeping until 630. And she basically wakes the kids up at 709. Yeah. So they're late. You know, they're running late. And Eddie's like, okay, we're going to take them to school. You're coming, right? She goes, I mean, I guess. Does she wear pajamas? And she's like, no. so then over at the other house Wendy is just lying in bed and she's like I don't I don't know what to do just lying there in bed like a dead person like what in the hell am I supposed to do so one of the kids Haley comes in and she says well we could do the animal morning routine I'll hold him back and you can get the poop you're gonna do great she goes great so then basically She's like, this is, she hates it.

32:57So then she basically, we then go to, Wendy essentially picks up the poop. And then three hours later, it's like three hours until the rules change and Althea has to vacuum the whole house. So she starts vacuuming and she's like, being a real housewife is a lot harder than expected. I mean, Wendy's rules just leave no room for error and no room to relax. I can't wait to change the rules of the house. so wendy is like yeah there was also wendy's when wendy cleaned up the poop she was like wait this is your mom's the only thing she does all day is she just cleans up this poop that took like three seconds yeah lady doesn't have to do anything and also the daughter hayley who was helping her clean the poop or showing her is the daughter that's parentified so there's an older kid who comes over and she's got a boyfriend i think did she bring her boyfriend or was it just her later they're kind of like the parents to the kids and she hugs each of the kids and she makes sure they're okay and when they come home from school she hugs each of them and it's like welcome home from school how was school and Wendy's like okay so Haley's the mom you know and Haley is a hands-on mom so that's why these kids are doing okay because they have someone raising them they have the dad and this this daughter mom yeah and actually the two daughters um seem uh at the Shapiro's like very bright young women.

34:18I mean, the kids seem, I mean, the kids are like, the two boys are young. Oh, the kids are sweet. Yeah, they're all real sweet. But like the two like daughters seem like they're really like very, very sharp and they're like ready to kind of like break free of this chaos. So Wendy is like, okay, everyone, welcome to Wendy's world, first order of business. Gotta protect your home from robbers. You never know when they may strike. Okay, we're gonna cover all of our cameras. I know that sounds counterproductive, but trust me, It's what you do when the robbers come. Hide this book and with the chachilla, rule number two.

34:52So she's like, okay, 7 p.m. is dinner, no devices. We've got to come together, and we're going to spend time doing what each of you want to do. So she hangs out with Haley, and she's crocheting, and she's like, yeah, my mom taught me to crochet. And she goes, yeah, well, you know, baby Skylar was talking about football, and he was talking about how your mom doesn't go to his games. And she goes, well, you know, maybe she's aloof and a little bit in her own world. But, you know, when I was growing up, she was a PTA mom and me and Dylan were in theater and she was like making the costumes. She was there at every single meeting.

35:28And so we find out that that mom, these other kids don't get that mom, you know, and she was very type A. But now she moved to Florida and had a nervous breakdown. That's me just guessing. and she's like it's like two different people and she goes well you know i see the way you're embracing the kids and you're like the mother do you feel like you and your mom switched roles and she's like the child and you're the mom she's like well i kind of parent the kids how i want my parent how i want to parent my kids when i'm older like with more structure more regimen and like i don't know if that makes me sound crazy like a military person she's like no i don't think that like making breakfast for your brothers and sisters crazy.

36:10So Haley is basically like, I'm just glad that my mom isn't stressed out like as she used to be. But like, sometimes I wish she could be more present in my life, you know, kind of like how I had it when my, you know, my sister and I were growing up, which is also interesting that there's like this divide around like the two daughters and then the two sons. Like, was it, I don't know. Like I want to like know more. Did she like, did something change when she had like her third child? Was she like planning just to stop after two? I just keep on like creating these stories in my head about what, what changed for this lady.

36:40Yeah. Like I'll give you two more if you don't make me do anything or something. I don't know, but I can't do this. I already got two, I already got two up and running and now there's a third one. I don't know if I could do this anymore for those of my life. Yeah. So then back at the other house, Althea is teaching the kids to crochet and they love it. They're having fun. And then they want to paint stuff. And Eddie's like, this is going to be messy. Is this water soluble? And she goes, we'll find out. And so they put up this big, like, protective blanket over the carpet. And they're all doing this in the living room.

37:13But, like, why not? The foyer is right there. And, like, why are you doing it here on the carpet? Unless Wendy and Eddie already had a plan to dig up that carpet. And they knew they were going to be renovating. So who cares? But it just seemed like such a strange place to do these arts and crafts. Like, you may not have any rules. But don't you have some logic? Do you like, why not say let's do it in the kitchen on the counter or like, wow, why there? Yeah. She doesn't care. Like that he's that he asks is the water, is it water soluble? And she's like, I don't care. Let's go do it on the white carpet.

37:44You know, she's an asshole. Like this lady's just an asshole. She doesn't care about anybody else. And she hides it with a smile, you know, but she's just, at the end of the day, an asshole is an asshole. Here comes one right now.

38:02The crew spills the paint, of course, immediately. Red, bright red paint all over the carpet. And they're like, oh my God, oh my. Eddie's like, I'm going to get in so much trouble. He's freaking out. And Cameron's just like, I'm going to show mama my crochet work. So then in the other house, Wendy goes to the beach with Shane. She plays the piano with Dylan. She goes and watches football with Skylar. And she's like, that's my baby. That's my baby. He does really well. It was cute. Did I earlier say that Dylan was Wendy's child? I don't know how I, where that came from. I was like, when I said that, I was like, that's strange that she had one child that doesn't have a K.

38:41Dylan is not Wendy's child. So they, yeah, Wendy's like covering a lot of ground. She's like out and about doing a million things down in Florida, but the other family, but over the CFOs, they're just in the living room painting, doing crochet. so um eddie's asked eddie's like so are you guys uh you guys about you guys about to do this you know play some basketball because they're putting up the basketball hoop in the kitchen and they're like yeah and then they're and then althea's gonna order dinner in she's like no dishes it's great that means more fun time yeah so now that wendy wendy's people no devices at family meal.

39:22So then Althea's parents come and join. And one of the kids is like, I'm bored. And she's like, come talk to me. So she's like, nope, it's the, you're not doing anything. It's the thick of dinner. You're going to sit right here and you're going to enjoy it. And the kid's like, my mom would let me go outside and play in the clubhouse. And she's like, I'm not your mother. Sit down. Yeah. And he's like lying on the table because he's having a tantrum because he's bored. It's like, okay, kids, this is why you need to have some sort of rules for your children because they become monsters. Yeah. And so no one knows how to sit at the table.

39:58They're like, we haven't done this. And Craig says, we haven't done this since we lived in New York. And she's like, wow, you know, well, I've enjoyed you guys. I've learned so much from me today. And you've exceeded my expectation. You're my own. Like, you're my own now. I went to a football game and played piano. You are my children now. So Wendy gets really into it, which is surprising. It was a nice turn to see Wendy, like, get so soft and sweet. And Haley is like, you really listen, and I appreciate that. Like, you hear me. We see each other. And Grandma's like, that's very nice. So Haley loves Wendy.

40:32I think it's because, like, Haley seems like a little brainiac, and she probably, and, like, Wendy sees that and probably, like, takes her under her wing, which is very cute. Well, and also they had the conversation where Wendy's like, so you're basically the parent here, and the kid's trying to excuse the mom, like, well, she doesn't mean it. Wendy's like, yeah, you're the mom. And it's like finally someone acknowledging what this kid does for the family, which is nice and terribly sad as well. So then it's over at the Asafo's house. Normally it would be time for bedtime and praying, but Althea's like, okay, well, no more bedtime.

41:09Have fun. Eddie, what do you think? And he's like, I'm tired. But now the kids just get to play. And they're like, they're playing with that basketball hoop like crazy. And they're pretty much up till like 1 a.m. Yeah. And now we get a spontaneous life adventure because that's another rule. So they go see alpacas. Althea takes them to go see alpacas at an alpaca farm. And Cameron's so funny. She has one and it's kind of following her around. And she's like, why are you following me? Am I your favorite lover? yeah what was the name of that one alpaca forgot what it was like davante and he's like davante and the lady's like yeah his name is davante oh so then at the other house um althea is getting ready to go the kids are like when do you leave please make it soon but no they said that they had fun with her and carter's like yeah you guys never let us have fun.

42:10Yeah. So Wendy, Wendy says her goodbyes to Shapiro's and, and she's, she, she enters, she comes back home and like, oh my God, oh my God. Hi. And they're like, Eddie's like, Wendy, maybe Althea, Althea meet Wendy. They're like, hi, nice to meet you. They hug, it's nice and everything. And right away, Cameron goes, mom, look at her carpet. And he looks, she's like, uh, I'm like, Althea's lucky that Susan wasn't there to see that stain because Susan would have let her have it. Susan would have killed her. So Wendy's like, okay, let's have a seat. Well, I can have a better view of the spot you left on my carpet.

42:46Althea's like trembling. She's like, oh my God, I'm nervous. She's like laughing like nervously. Wendy goes, well, I'd really love to know your honest opinion. Just kidding. I'm not really going to listen. She goes, well, do you really wake up at 5.30 a.m.? No, I wake up at 5 a.m. I'm up no later than 5.30 a.m. You didn't really read that very carefully. is does a printer type look scary to you is that why you can leave all my directions and she's like wow i wish i was a morning person that's the only thing she takes out of it is that she had to get up early this woman is a mess and wendy's like well i wasn't a morning person i made myself a morning person because of my kids and she goes well i mean i just did that for so many years yeah and you still have kids yeah wendy's like okay i got that you do your own thing and you take up space in the house and everyone revolves around you.

43:35And then it really struck me because that daughter of yours, Haley, who is so amazing, she gives to your other children the type of mothering that she wishes that she had. And she said, you see me. And I feel that means that she feels that she has been unseen. So from one mother to another, from a very type A organized and successful mom to someone who is a disaster sitting here in front of the red stain and she put on my carpet. Try to meet your kids where they are, okay? And your husband does everything. And I know, you know, he's doing, you know, he does what he does in the house for you. And, you know, I want to impart on you maybe one day or two during the week.

44:14Maybe you could help him because I foresee happening, like you guys are going to exchange burnout. And she's like, oh yeah, well, he's also kind of a martyr. So let's not forget that about old craggy boy. Wendy just looks at her like, Are you fucking kidding me? Like you are after. First of all, Wendy very kindly read this woman for filth. I mean, she literally called out every single issue very well, but she wasn't totally mean about it. She was extremely blunt, but she wasn't mean. And then this lady is like, oh, yeah, my husband's a martyr. You're calling your husband a martyr. He's raising your kids.

44:49He's paying for everything. He's doing all the laundry. You got a lot of fucking nerve, lady. Yeah, that was shocking when she did that. she threw him under the bus when yeah well give it to me okay because i give it right to you she's okay i i know you did she's like yeah well welcome to housewives 101 okay well i think um um she's so nervous to tell wendy what's wrong with like her life she's like um i think my biggest takeaway is that the kids feel like they're too scheduled and there's not enough fun and i i want you to build in some more flexible free time so that way they can find their passion and they're happy so they can find joy.

45:24Maybe you can find joy. I don't know. Please don't hate me. Please don't hate me. And Wendy's like, flexibility, fun, and free time. I love that for other people. We'll see. So Althea's like, are you going to keep the basketball hoop? No, you're lucky she's not like shoving it over your head and strangling you with it. Frankly. She's like, that's the first thing that I'm taking down when you leave. But there's nothing breakable. She's like, yeah, you can take that with you. She's like, what's the worst case scenario? I don't know. Maybe coming home to a red carpet, Althea. I don't know, but this time it's blood.

45:58So Althea says that Wendy reminded her to empower her kids and they still need a mom and they want their mommy. So she's got work to do, guys, and she'll be a better team player with her martyr-ass husband and maybe even do some more housework. And Wendy learned to give her kids more latitude. Neither one of them are going to do these things. And we know, I think this is the first episode that it's like, yeah, no one's listening here. I don't think either of these are going to listen. So we see Althea came home and made her family a priority. She even visited Haley at her internship in Washington.

46:33She surprised the family by cooking scrambled eggs one time. And, you know, she only cooked them one time. If that's the big deal they're going to make of this. On paper plate, scrambled eggs, one of the easiest things you could ever make. Literally so easy. Wendy replaced her carpet and took the kids to the beach or something stupid. And she let the basketball hoop stay up for like three extra days. It got three bonus days before it was thrown in the trash. Yeah, they did not learn. Yeah, I think Althea is probably not going to stay with this family. I think she's going to be out. Something's going to happen.

47:07But I got bad vibes from that one. And I feel bad for her because I do see her posting on Reddit and stuff. And she does seem really sweet. And I haven't read any comments or anything about this episode. because like who's going to go read a wife swap thread? You know what I mean? Even I'm not that sad. But I feel like she's probably going to get eaten alive in there. Yeah, I think it's, yeah. I think wife swap was a very pleasant surprise. I thought it was going to be awful. I thought it was going to be awful and super produced and scripted and planned. And that's definitely, it definitely is produced and everything.

47:44But it was a much better show than I thought. I really enjoyed watching it, but I did feel like four episodes is perfect. If this was like an eight episode season, I would be like, okay, let's wrap this up. So nice four episode kind of like afternoon snack of a show. And now we just move on to, well, we've got more shows coming up on the schedule. We got Southern Charms coming back. Beverly Hills is coming back. Vanderpump Rules is back in December also. So, like, the roster is filling up all over again. Yeah. So here we go, everybody. Buckle up. So until next time, we will see you over on Patreon with bonus episodes and Crappins On Demand with videos.

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