#3088 Below Deck Med S10E09 Part 2: Good Ol’ Unreliable Nathan

0:03Watch What Happens Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Happens. This is part two of a two-part recap. If you're like, hey, wait a minute, I didn't hear part one. Guys, it's because we put out a lot of recaps. Go back and listen to part one, okay? It's before this one. Bye. Enjoy the show. So now we go to Joe and V, and Joe is like, I've got a good feeling about this charter. What about you? And Nate, oh, whatever, Nathan, sorry. And he's like, oh, I'm really excited. it could be a good challenge just to really do the decky part we know it's coming so everybody gets to work and then we see captain sandy you know like look at me just because i'm a captain doesn't mean i don't work look at me hand me a chamois i'm gonna do a window this window's filthy this is disgusting this is disgusting i want the whole deck crew up here we need a preference sheet meeting before i yell at nathan Okay, everyone, preference sheet, but it's an angry preference sheet meeting.

1:21And it's not even a sheet. It's an iPad. Preference iPad. But I prefer, you know, like I prefer Zoom, you know, but that's just neither here or there. Okay, the next two days, co-primaries Camille and Patricia with a J. Think about it. With a J. Yeah, where's the J? I'll let you figure that one out. They're celebrating their 20th wedding anniversary. Ooh, I'll take it over here in this new preference sheet meeting. He wants to treat his friends Imran, Andrew McGill, Dr. Carla, Dr. Rossi, and Mike to a dream vacation. Why does that sound like a murder mystery? It really does.

1:57Itinerary requests. On day one, the guests want to indulge in the water toys that the yacht has to offer. Everything goes out, people. Within five minutes, I want to see all those water toys. God, I love singing my greatest hits. God, if they put the water slide out, put the little crocodile, the inflatable crocodile, put the banana out, put the naughty boys out. If you got a yo-yo, throw it in the ocean, every single toy out there right away. The group would love to have a romantic party set in ancient times like Cleopatra and Mark Anthony. Do you know what happened in that relationship? they want to have a special romance like oj simpson and nicole brown as long as we're talking about 1994 am i right they're requesting a night to dinner theme of sexy nightlife of spain and they would like a little taste of tapas sucking pig from madrid and intense seafoods from barcelona you know these themes are very out of the box are they tapas tapas in spain come on josh josh you're proving not to be the worst chef in the world but seriously here's an out of the box theme intense seafood from barcelona whoa suckling pig oh crazy intense seafoods and tapas.

3:27You know, I've gone skinny dipping with a bunch of hippies, drinking ayahuasca in the Sacred Valets of Peru, playing guitar with a drummer from Queen, although I'm pretty sure that when I played guitar with a drummer from Queen, I was still on my ayahuasca trip, so I cannot verify that that actually happened. But the point is, I've never been to me.

3:45And then we see the photo of Josh naked with rose petals all over his wiener as he reaches towards the sky. And the sky says, no, I just fuck any man, really. I'm right here. Sorry. So now on the bridge, Joe and V are talking about how excited they are for the charter. And Sandy goes, oh, oh, by the way, one other thing. When that sun starts to come up, the boat better be clean on the outside. But otherwise, 40 years of, you know, on and off weather. It could happen. So that's just my threat to you. You know, in the beginning of this season, Nathan had a rocky start because he didn't have a strong deck team.

4:32And, you know, now he has a strong crew and he's still struggling. And we're headed into Charter 5. And this is the third charter with this new deck team. And I got big expectations, buddy. Okay. So I want to see Nathan take charge. I want to see him delegate. and I have a smooth running deck. Fresh in the decks all the time. I'm going to be paying attention. All right? Greens. Greens. Nothing but greens. All right? Let's get to it. And just remember, at the stroke of midnight, if I see a streak on this window, then you all will be sleeping for the next eight hours or so as mandated by the employee handbook.

5:12Okay. Good night, everyone.

5:19It's the last midnight It's the last curse So we see everybody getting ready for charter And you know Kizzy's miserable in laundry Love to see it And so they have to get in their whites And Max is bringing Kathy a mug of coffee or tea And she's like Oh, a man after my own heart I'm sorry I really know he wants to get married When there's a bit of donut in here

5:47so uh max is like oh congratulations um so kathy's getting her two stripes and um she's like kizzy might have beat me to my man but she will not beat me at my job and it's all it's all exciting and asia says coming into charter five i'm worried that there's going to be to be a bit of residual tension between Kathy and Kizzy after the kiss. I'm just going to shower everybody with positivity.

6:18Well, maybe not. I'll read them for filth, but I'll say it with a very positive tone and a smile on my face. So the guests arrive and Sandy's like, hello everyone, welcome to the boat. This is a beautiful boat and we have all sorts of fun things for you. We got toys. So many toys. You can't even imagine how many toys there will be. But if by dawn the next morning and the sun is rising, the toys are not back in the boat, then you and your families will suffer a terrible feat. You might get sunburned. Here's what I want to see before the sun rises on this boat. One, the cow is white as milk. Two, the chamois is red as blood.

7:05Three, Is someone going to take these napkins from us? Is someone going to take these napkins from us? Damn it, foiled again. You know, when someone's going to cast a magic spell and you really should listen to all the bullet points.

7:23So the guests come and Imran, some guy named Imran, interrupts everything, interrupts the welcome. And he's like, yeah, someone should probably take our clothes from us. That would be nice. Mike you are not even the primary How dare you Imran Always the guy who's not the primary Is going to make the splash So yeah he basically interrupts Sandy's little introduction to demand That someone take the towels from their hands God forbid they hold on to it for five seconds Oh the cloths Yeah it was like little cloths I demand you take all of our clothes From us right now Okay that's kind of an odd request Well he does basically say I need my laundry done In fact, as they go on the tour, he's like, I need to do laundry ASAP.

8:09Is there like a servant you can send to do this for us? And he's just like, he's here a servant. Oh God, that was pretty gross. And she starts laughing and she's like, I think this guy thinks he's being funny. And he goes, yeah, this is the guy you've been worried about. His friend says, this is the guy you've been worried about. She goes, well, I'll grant him the grace and this might be a joke. but if there isn't, there might be an uprising amongst the servants. She should meet Ramona Singer, who literally called them servants without a wink and a nod on that one season of New York. She's like, we're the servants.

8:49So Josh is preparing in the galley, and they're leaving the dock, and you know the usual stuff like lines and anchors and things like that, and Kizzy is sad. This is funny. Yeah. Kizzy has to do the laundry and she's like, oh God, Imran's laundry stinks, which I love for Imran because he's going to come on here and be a jerk. And everyone hates him and he's smelly. Yeah, but also laundry should stink. I will allow him that. Like, I mean, Kizzy, what are you expecting? So then Imran's like - She's making out with it. She's like, but hey, I'm doing this for other women everywhere. Well, there's no other eligible men to make out with, unfortunately.

9:29so Imran's like I mean guys I mean how do like how do I call the servants like what do I call them I mean servants they're servants aren't they servants what else do we call them servants and this you know his friends are mortified they're like oh my god we can't believe it yeah they're like please stop god please geez let's stop so now Josh is wrapping grape leaves I love a man who can wrap a grape leaf listen you're suddenly hot to me sir and then we go to Nathan who is in the bridge with Sandy and he's like can I just leave the flaters inflated the fenders sorry can i leave the fenders inflated can i leave the flaters and fender what was that if you oh see this is this is what happened you didn't clean the windows by dawn now you've been cursed you've been cursed to say things i was white his milk chamois red his blood hair is yellow his corn slippers pure his cold

10:23so uh he's like hey nathan just remember one thing nice is different than good okay so he's like can i so can i just leave the fenders inflated because we are pros remember i mean we're not a floating trailer park geez this guy over here

10:45so now um the the boat is like wobbling you know or like waving or whatever and um a guest falls in her chair and then a dryer door hits kizzy in the head and then i cheer for a dryer door and then sandy starts looking out at the water with her binoculars and she's like oh my god a live version of my favorite show is coming to town wind oh god look at that and they actually show us the waves that for the first time ever they actually put a little graphic that's like look, there's the waves. Look how big they are. I was like, okay. Normally we just take their word for it, but sure. We got to talk.

11:17We got to talk. Nathan, Nathan, get to the bridge. And then she tells us, now listen, sometimes there's storms and they're happening in other places where you have wind effects. So I'd like to introduce my new spinoff show to Netflix. Wind effects may not be actually windy, but you're still suffering the consequences. starring the girl from Revenge.

11:46So everyone, everyone. Okay, okay. So, oh, so, oh, sorry. I thought I was gonna go talk to the guests but I decided that was just my practice. Let's see what else is happening in the boat before I go and tell the guests what's happening. I just, okay, let me try that again. So everyone, yeah, that's a good starter. I like that. So everyone, it's a good way to start the conversation. Okay, Aisha, you have to tell the guests we have to go back to the doc because we're going to go because it swells. I'm overwhelmed. I saw so many big waves out there. The wind is actually happening in real life. It's so exciting.

12:16My heart's racing. Yeah. We're going to go to Villanova because it's, you know, just for the night. It's a nice protected marina. And tomorrow our hope is to be able to get off the dock. But we're going to have to see how many episodes of wind effects are released. And so Nathan is back in the bridge with her. And she's like, weather update just came through. Oh, my God. We're in trouble. So now Asha goes to tell the guests. and she's like, well, Sandy said to let you know that the swell is picking up a lot, so we're going to head into the marina and you can watch all episodes now on Netflix. For a limited time only.

12:53So they're docking, and so Norma Lee, Norma Lee, hey, that was a joke. It was a pun on Norma Lee, as if she could get with Captain Lee. Norma, remember? It's like when I said Norma Lee. He didn't even want to fuck her. so normally i'll never be able to say normally normal again oh wow i sound like i'm doing sunday hey that could be a great song for into the woods as well normally norma cannot be normal right that's good that's right play it takes two normally normally why can't you be normal normally so it's time for docking and um v is like oh god it's so hard to be professional around Joe. I mean, I just look at him and I'm like, I want to kiss you, but I mean, we're on charter.

13:41So professional handshake, not blushing, don't look into your eyes, not seeing the sparkle and I'm nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. Okay. Have you not seen this show before? Have you not listened to half the things he's told you? I don't feel for you V though. Back away. Back away. So they usually, I have to say usually, cause I literally cannot say normally anymore now, but they usually dock the boat, like with the butt, the butt of the boat against the dock, but this time they have to do it sideways, and this is causing Nathan to have a true mental breakdown because they've never done it sideways.

14:14Portside, portside, portside, portside, portside, portside, portside, portside, portside, but if it's portside, the lines are completely wrong for portside. And so Imran's eyes like, servants, am I right? Hey, so you're going to use the bow thrusters with the stern thrusters, but am I right? You ever see a fin on a fish? It's like a keel. Am I right? Keels and holes. rudders anchors right she's like yeah I don't have a stern thruster and he goes you don't you're American good one Imran so Nathan's like oh season we've been docking the boat Sam too but now we're gonna do it in the marina now oh we just have to do it dockside too oh this is just a new challenge for our deck I'm gonna lose my I'm walking on complete egg shells what am I gonna do with Captain Sandy right now I pray I can't I pray that it goes well it's not gonna go well I can tell you that right now because Joel's already knocking into walls.

15:09So now Imran is blocking Sandy's view and she's like, excuse me, I need to see, stupid. And he's like, get me a crust of bread, you dumb bitch. Hey, this is an A docking and you're a B person, so see your way out of this conversation.

15:28See, spelled S-E-N, it's wordplay. There's a wordplay union starting up. I don't know if you heard. This guy's terrible. So she's like, we need spring lines, spring lines. He's like, ah, that's American ass. Jesus, God. We call them. I was going to try and make a joke about spring rolls. But in America, we call them. What do we call them? The fried ones. Egg rolls. So you get egg rolls. Yeah, sorry. Okay, that failed. Just cut that out. You know what? Cut that out. Hey, okay, come on. Okay, come on. What's going on with the spring lines? Okay, what's going on? You don't have enough lines. It takes two lines.

16:03Two lines. It takes two. I thought one was enough. It's not true. It takes two spring lines. You came through. When the journey was rough, it takes two. It took two. It took two lines of us. Come on now. Hurry up.

16:18So Nathan's like, I don't know if I can do it. I'm just like, anything can happen on the sea. Will you kiss me? Oh, guys. Come on. Stay present. Stay present. every moment. Every moment is a present for the present moment. Come on, guys. So everyone's like, oh my God. And Joe's like, oh my God, what happened? What happened to the spring lines? And he's like, oh my God, I removed the wrong line. Oh my God, never mind. And Sandy's like, oh my God, leave the line, leave the line. Hello, little girl. What's your rush? You're missing all the flowers.

16:57And Nathan's like, oh, Joel, come on, go over there. Go over there, guys. Come on, guys. I was like, don't get mad. Don't get mad. Come on. Be calm. Be calm. Be calm, little one. Be calm. Who out there could love you for the night? Who out there that I cannot supply? And Nathan's like, I can't get the line there. I can't get the line there. Agony. She's like, oh, my God. Stop yelling already. And so V is like, it's so much pressure. It's so much pressure. I've never talked like this before. And Joe's like, well, I don't like getting spoke to like I'm a piece of shit. You shouldn't communicate to anyone in this way.

17:35There's no need for it. And meanwhile, Nathan's running around like belting at the top of his lungs. Hey, quiet, Nathan. Use your walkie-talkie. Careful the words you say. Charter guests will listen. He's like, agony. All alone in the night. Stop getting mad. He's like, I'm not getting mad. I'm just being assertive. Isn't that what you want from me? and Max is like, well, like you work with, he's like, you work with Captain Sandy, she never screams. Look at her. If she gets mad, she gets short of pant. That is all she do. You need to learn like this. We have the best role model. Just replicate.

18:14You do copy paste of doing what Captain Sandy do. Watch, voila. You are best groomer ever. And you wake up to somebody saying, hello, baby. Hello, baby.

18:26I'll tie this one off. I'll tie this one off, everyone. Stop yelling. Stop. Use your radio. Use your radio. Come on. Use the radio, Nathan. You can do it. He's like, copy. So they dock. So they finish docking. Everything's fine. Everything's fine as usual. They really needed Captain Kerry here to be like, this time we got to go in port side. And let me tell you what happens to port side. People die. All right. It's fine. We got in there fine. There we go. It's fine. He really does the best doomsday docking. I know. Monologues. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial.

19:07Okay. All right. It's time to talk to the guests. Okay. Time. It's showtime, Sandy. Do it. So everyone. God, that was such a good opening line. So everyone. He. So we're hearing a different. I practiced that one. Sometimes it's good to have some locked and loaded. We're in this marina because there's weather. There's no easy way to say it, so I'll just sing it. There are storm clouds in the sky.

19:35So they're like, oh, my God, we're stuck here for the night, and you sing. She's like, yeah, you know what? Today's not going to be safe out of there. We're just going to stay here tonight. Listen, I am the captain. I've got a record to keep, and my record is turning back the boat and refusing to go on the ocean more than any other captain in below deck history. Okay. We're staying on dock tonight. Yeah. But the good news is that we decided to dock in the most scenic dock in all of Spain, the Villanova parking lot. Enjoy the view. Okay, great.

20:13Guys, just enjoy it. You know, where else can you see the lights reflecting off of the big lots? You're going to love it here. Okay. Okay, so enjoy, enjoy. It's just not safe out there. It's dangerous. So Nathan and Kizzy are talking in the galley and Kizzy's like, I actually really hate everyone today. I'm sad. Like, do you ever get in a mood where you're just like, I don't like anyone today? Boo, boo, hoo. He's like, oh, sorry, did you hate me too? Hmm, I haven't really spoken to you today. You've been ignoring me. He's like, well, shall we never speak then? She goes, should we not just randomly come kiss me in the laundry?

20:53And he's like, oh. She's like, oh.

20:58A swing and a miss for Gizzy. Swing and a miss.

21:04So Captain Sandy checks in on V and asks her how she's feeling. And she's like, oh my God, this was my first time doing it sideways. I didn't mean it like that. I want to go slowly. I want to go slowly. I wasn't talking about that. So now they're decorating for their luxury ancient Greece dinner. and Asha's talking to Josh and asking about canapé beginnings or start time. And he's like, all right, we've got grape leaves, oysters, going to tempura. Then I'm going to, you know, I used to do tempura oysters at a restaurant like 15 years ago. It was delicious. Haven't done it for 15 years. Surely it will still work.

21:43Yeah. What could go wrong with, you know, fried food a la minute? So Josh is like, when I hear ancient times dinner, I think of feeding them grapes, you know those kind of vibes he's like they're like do you think about the Roman Empire a lot he doesn't even pick up on really what that means he's like you know I actually come from a town in England that has a lot of Roman influence called Bath which has the Roman Baths which I hated going to because I hate Baths and it brings me back memories of Rome even though I have no memories of Rome because I wasn't actually there what was the question again

22:16so yeah we're doing our Greek romantic dinner featuring the inspiration of Anthony and Cleopatra. I would also suggest maybe a great love story like, I don't know, Antigone, or maybe a real laugh, real belly, heartwarming one like Medea. I don't know. They could go in so many different directions. Oedipus. Love that love story. Great. It's a good one. Yeah. Yeah, it's a good one for Mother's Day. So the guests are complaining that they're just sitting in the parking lot, which, you know, you deserve it because you brought Imran. Okay. He's fit for the Big Lots parking lot. So then we go to Kizzy and Kathy decorating.

23:00And Kizzy's like, I don't even think I've been outside today. And Kathy's like, oh, you do seem a little bit down today. I'm sorry, do I have a hickey right here on my neck? And Kizzy's like, I'm just in one of those moods where everyone's pissing me off. You know, when you have those days? And Kathy's like, not really. are you cleaning a window while you're setting the table? I am sorry, it's just how I stay happy did you just windex my forehead I did I'm restless so now everybody gets ready for C and let's see whatever, Kizzy's like oh god if I'm going to be in the cabins is there much point to even dressing for this?

23:41Oh god I'll just stay in this, I'm not changing into anything Uh oh, Kizzy's starting to spiral I know, she cannot deal with being squirreled away in laundry And also not have any guys to flirt with So Sandy checks in on Josh Hey, those are some impressive grape leaves What, they're edible too? Oh wow, you're working on different levels now Josh Wow, very impressed You know what, here's a question for you Why don't grapes ever just stay? You know, where are they always leaving? You know, it's the headline. Grape leaves. Yeah. I feel so sad. So sorry for grapes wife. You know, stay with me.

24:28Now everybody's in their Greek outfits and Kathy's feeding Max grapes. And someone calls Imran a peasant boy and asks how he likes the wine. And he's like, not a fan, not a fan of this wine. Okay. okay well we can keep trying until you find one that you like that's not a problem um and then one guy is like i love the vibe and the friendship friendships and us being here on this beautiful boat in this parking lot it's just fucking unbelievable right and they all laugh so and it seems like everyone's actually pretty normal except for that one guy that one guy is just awful and the rest are just like you know they're just kind of joking about the situation so uh josh brings out his grape leaves and stuff like that and uh asia sends kathy to campus with kizzy and kizzy's just she's just being a spoil sport and kathy's like oh how are you baby cakes she's like really good i know i can be grumpy it's like if i was in front of the guests i'd be like hee hee but i know that in front of you it's just fine you know what like i'm tired of you announcing that you're grumpy at this point just be grumpy because now it's just performative now Now you're just really begging people to say nice things about you to get you into a good mood.

25:39And no one's taking the bait. It's hilarious. Yeah. She's like, but I know that I can be grumpy around you and that's fine. She goes, no, it's not. I need full energy. Okay. Happy to Sammy. Happy to Sammy. She's like, oh, fuck off. So then Aisha's clearing dinner and Imran's like, for my 40th birthday, I'm going to steal one idea from your 40th birthday. And the guy's like, oh, is that the hookers or the Coke? and Imran goes no the quotes the quotes oh yeah this one I've been poor and I've been rich and I choose rich every single time okay you know what never mind I take back everything I just said about these guests but I love the Erica Jane nod so the crew is serving the main chorus now and everyone's like well can we give it a slow clap to Josh slow clap to Josh it's basically what Kizzy's giving to everybody else so and josh is like well we've got mushroom puree the gnocchi is truffled it's also gluten-free just in case god that's traumatizing the asparagus red red juice reju beef oh i hope it's cooked to your liking god does anybody here want to kiss me like no god get out of here had to try uh so he goes back down to the galley be like because i'm a lemon squeezer Giza crowd, please.

26:57Gee, I can't understand why he's not getting laid. So then everyone is like, the dinner's done. Guests are going to bed. Kizzy's helping with dishes. Asha and Kathy are just hanging around talking and stuff. And Kizzy's just annoyed because that's her thing today. And Imran says he's going to go masturbate so he can be ready for tomorrow.

27:23That's a real classic. So Kizzy's talking to Josh and she's like, you know what I was just thinking right now? I'm not really a yachty, you know? And I feel like being around people who are super, super yachty, you know, I just find it draining, you know? And he goes, you mean Kathy? He's like, oh, let me guess. It's the person who won the man that you were trying to steal from her, Kathy. And she's like, yeah, I mean, I really like her, but she is really yachty, you know what I mean? Now Kizzy is going to do that thing where she's going to reframe the whole narrative to be like, oh, I'm actually not, like, like, I'm happy for her, but, like, I'm also above her.

27:59Like, yeah, she may be better at the job than me, but that's because I just don't care about the job, because she's, like, so all about being a yachtie. Isn't that just so sad? She's now gonna, like, change this whole thing as if she is not literally a yachtie on a boat about yachties, right? On a show about yachties right now. Yeah. I like how you say it, like, aunties. Yachties. Yachties. Yachties. Yachties. Yachties. but he is so annoying and josh is actually very good like he's very sensitive um i think he's annoying but he's also like a very sensitive nice person and he's like so are you feeling left out she goes maybe and he goes you'd like to be the center of attention and i'm not right now and he goes exactly i mean maybe she's a little on the nose but uh he's like well i mean she's just making me feel like a little bit small you know and i hate the fact that someone has the power to do that to me.

28:49I mean, what the fuck? How can you not feel small when you base your entire self-worth on what men think of you and attention that you're getting from everybody else? You're never going to feel any self-worth that way, Kizzy. Come on, get with it. You're like such a beautiful girl. You've got such a good personality. Well, you've got such a charm about you and such charisma. You don't have to be like this. There's still hope for you. All those things, attention, attention male attention all the things that she is seeking those are all fleeting and ephemeral okay they're not lasting and that's why she will always feel small because uh she's not really she's filling a cup that has a hole in it and it's just not going to work out so tizzy josh is like shall i stick my penis in that hole the cup's like no all i want is leave me alone all i want us a male attention for once in my life.

29:40Well, you know, I'm here for you. I have to. Oh, I'm sorry, Ben. I didn't mean to cut you off. No, her saying that she wants male. She wants to be the center of attention. She's actively the center of Josh's attention at this moment. And she's like, well, not your attention. I just wish I could get one male to pay attention to me. He's just staring at her like, any more about your deep-seated feelings? It's like, no, God, not you. But I think, honestly, one of the best things to happen to me was aging because I've you know, I think so much of your time being young is spent like, oh my God, what do I look like?

30:12And who wants to fuck me? And like, am I good looking enough? And like everywhere you go, it's like, am I good looking? Like who's looking at me and who's looking at my friend? I mean, I think that's just such a normal part of growing up. And then there's a certain point where you just go bald and you get chubby and you age a little bit and there's like no running from it. And you actually have to start like talking, talking to people differently. And like you start having to have other skills in life to get you by. And I think that that's going to be good for Kizzy. So maybe we need to check in with Kizzy in 20 years.

30:45It'll probably be much more palatable. Yeah. Cause like in your four, the forties are great because you really do get a sense of just more of who you are. I think, I don't know. I mean, listen, I love therapy. I think therapy helps, you know, it's, it's great that we have, well, I love ice cream too. You know, I think it's great that we have, you know, like our podcast is doing well. You know, when you spend so many years in L.A., you know, just trying to make ends meet and trying to find success and trying to make it as a writer and trying to make it this and that. Like it can it can actually do a number on your psyche.

31:18But like, you know, to finally have like a stable job that's doing nicely, like all those things kind of like help you relieve some pressure. and you start to realize you can, you can sort of focus on yourself a bit more and you start to realize what you like, what you don't like. And, and, and you can just kind of let a whole bunch of bullshit go. And, um, I'm looking forward to that for Kizzy, like you said, in 20 years, when she hits 43, unfortunately it doesn't always work out that way. We're, we're, we're lucky. Yeah. When it's just not all attention from men, you know, and I, and I know as someone who wanted attention from men too, you know, and it's not just a woman thing, men do it too.

31:55So, But it's just not the way to live. It's sad. It's sad to watch it. It doesn't work out for everyone. Look at Brittany Bateman. She's like 53 and she's still in her kizzy face. Well, that's true. Yeah, that's true. I guess everybody doesn't change. But I mean, I said when you get chubby and bald. Oh, that's fair. There was also that element to it. But yeah, yeah, yeah. But anyway, just God, I hope the best for her. But God, right now she's fucking obnoxious. So now the next morning on the boat, everybody's getting up in the morning and captain's like, Joe, Joe, wake up the whole crew because they are leaving the dock in 15 minutes.

32:31You understand me? Into the sea, it's time to go. I hate to leave. I have to though. Oh God, wake up, wake up. Okay, we're going to go. We're going to go. Get the anchor, get the anchor. All right, now we're out. Okay, we're going. Departure, that was a great departure. Now all we have to do is drop an anchor and nothing could go wrong here. Two shackles in the water. Two shackles in the water. Not more than two. Okay, how many shackles do we have? Three shackles in the water. No, why do you have the extra shackle in the water? How'd you miss that? He's like, I was looking back on the finger. And she's like, ah, God, stop staring at your fingers.

33:07Jeez. So then breakfast time and the anchor is fine. Everything's fine. But Nathan is just fucking up left and right. He's not doing so great. So now's water toy time. And Imran asks Max if he could drive the tender. And Max is like, yes, of course. You can do it. You should do it. Enjoy. Good night. He gives him the hands of the keys. How could you do that? What an idiot. So they're like, they're doing that. And then meanwhile, Nathan is, Nathan's in the galley. He goes in the galley and he's like sort of joking around with V and some other people, etc. And Captain Sandy comes in. She's like, Nathan, could you go do your job, please?

33:52It's like, oh, God. I'm like, and he's like, oh, God. I feel like I intense my body for one moment. And I got fucking chewed out. I'm working my ass off. Yeah, don't intense your body. You're on the clock. Meanwhile, while this is happening, Max is out in the tender with some guest who's driving it, sir. Don't intense. So, no, you're not really doing your job. Stay focused. I don't understand why Nathan keeps being goofy. Okay, I need a bosun. Not, wait, wait for everyone. A brosun. That was good That's right, that's right Nailed that one, hold on Did you hear that BB? BB, that was so good BB Let me go tell the guests So everyone I said, you need a bosun Not a brosun You understand bros, right?

34:43You're not, okay, great Not gonna laugh, that's fine Okay, so Then she gets up on the deck and she sees the Tinder situation. She goes, oh, fuck, who's in the Tinder? And he's like, oh, Max is away with one of the guests. And she's like, Max, Max, get back to the boat right now, you dumb fuck. So Max is like, oh, let us not go too much far from boat because Captain Sandy will not like it. And he's like, oh, what, is she going to get mad at you? Poor people. You can't let the guest drive the Tinder. Why is he over there? Get your fucking shit together on deck, Nathan. You understand? This isn't a free-for-all.

35:20I'm now pissed. Get Max back to the boat now. Dun, dun, dun. And that will end your journey. Boom. I wish. And that brings us to the end of Below Dick Mediterranean, everybody. Wow, what a shit show. Everyone, we will see you for our Salt Lake City recap. And definitely check out our bonus episode on Patreon this week, which was the trailer trash of the Valley Persian style and all that good stuff. Thanks for being here. We'll talk to you next time. Bye. Watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. It's always a party on Alison Block. Our way is the Amber way.

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38:54She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar. We love you guys.